Chasing the Forbidden

Kiara Amaris North knew that her parents are not really in love with each other, she was just a product of a loveless marriage. On her 24th birthday, her mother announced that she wants to be legally separated from her father because she has a new boyfriend. But of course, she won’t let that happen, she’ll do anything to save her parents’ marriage even if that means she has to seduce her mother’s boyfriend, Xanthos Archante.

• ────── ✾ ────── •

NOTE: I will mute disrespectful readers from now on. PLEASE. Please stop mentioning other writer’s stories or characters in my stories. Call me sensitive or whatever you want, but I found comments like that offensive, I won’t… and I will never take those as a compliment. Please stop doing that to me and to other writers as well. I love reading comments from the stories I worked hard writing… yes, writing is my relaxation but I can’t deny the fact that it is tiring as well. So please, be mindful of your comments, that’s all I ask for. Please, let’s respect each other. Thank you.

MOODBOARD

✿❯────「Kiara North」────❮✿

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

»Xanthos Archante«

credits to pinterest ~

Chapter One

WARNING: Nakakainis, unreasonable, toxic, at mababaw ang characters. Kung mataas ang standard niyo sa story at characters, please wag niyo na lang basahin ’to… salamat.

• • • ~ ~ ~ * * *

Kiara Amaris North

“Ano’ng plano ng family mo sa birthday mo?” tanong ng kaibigan kong si Abilene.

I just shrugged my shoulders. I don’t know, and honestly, I don’t care. A simple birthday celebration is fine with me, I’m so done with the extravagant and costly birthday celebrations. My parents always invite their business associates and investors during my birthday, and it sucks. Wala pa yata sa kalahati ang kilala ko na imbitado kapag birthday ko.

“I don’t know, I just want to sleep on my birthday for a fucking whole day. Business trips always exhaust me. I just want to take a long rest,” I said and closed my eyes.

“Magpahinga ka rin minsan, saka maghanap ng boyfriend,” Abi said while typing something on her phone.

“I don’t like commitments, Abi. I’m too busy to even look for a boyfriend who will agree to my conditions, like, we can only meet for at least once or twice a week for I am always busy. Kaya nga hanggang fling lang ako, e,” I said and drank my black coffee.

Mas convenient ang flings, they don’t demand loyalty, affection, and time. Kahit naman sobrang busy ko palagi, I need to have some fun din naman paminsan-minsan.

“Why don’t you just date my brother, Kiara? He won’t demand for your time and such. He’s a big catch too, right? Handsome, smart, and successful. Ano pa’ng hahanapin mo?” Abi put her phone inside her sling bag and smiled sweetly at me. I just rolled my eyes.

“Bakit ba ibinubugaw mo sa’kin palagi ang kuya mo?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ko. Napangisi na lang siya.

“Two reasons, bitch. One, I want you to be my sister-in-law, I don’t want anyone else, and number two, I just want to!” she squealed. I just shook my head and just focused on my laptop.

“Whatever, umalis ka na nga lang. Wala ka bang trabaho?” I asked and raised my eyebrow. Abi pouted and stomped her feet on the floor. I grimaced at the sound of her killer heels clicking on the floor.

Tumayo na lang siya saka isinukbit ang sling bag niya.

“Fine, I’ll go ahead. Make sure to take a rest tomorrow, you can call me if you wanna have some fun… you know,” she said and giggled. I just chuckled and shook my head.

Umalis na rin siya kaagad. My friend since elementary, Abilene, works as a hotel manager in a well-known hotel, siya na yata ang pinakastress-free na manager na nakilala ko.

Her brother on the other hand, Archer, is a businessman. Their family owns a successful company that manufactures different kinds of gadgets and Abi’s brother, Archer, is the chief operating officer of their family’s company at an early age. Abilene is actually right when she said that her brother is a big catch… but no.

I sighed while staring at my laptop’s screen. I bit the upper tip of my fountain pen while tapping my fingers on the table. This month’s sales decreased 1.2 percent. I closed my eyes and massaged my temple.

After graduating in college, I instantly took CPA board exam and passed the exam in just one try. I started working at our company as soon as I passed the CPA exam. I worked as a company accountant first but my Dad promoted me last year and made me the chief financing officer of North Technologies Corp. (NTC). Our family owns NTC, my late grandfather was the founder but Dad made it more successful. Kaya pressured din ako dahil ako ang magiging tagapag-mana nito since I’m the only child. I don’t know if I will be able to make NTC successful in the future just like my Dad did.

“Manang, where’s Mom and Dad?”

I put my bag on the table and slumped on the chair. Manang Celina, our maid for almost two decades, served me a cold water and started massaging my back. I smiled and closed my eyes, the best talaga ang hilot ni manang.

“Ang Mommy mo naroon sa kuwarto niya maghapon, ang Daddy mo naman hindi pa nauwi galing trabaho,” sabi ni manang habang hinihilot pa rin ang likod ko.

“Sige po, manang, salamat. Punta na po ako sa kuwarto ko.” Tumayo ako at kinuha ang handbag ko saka iniwan si manang sa dining area.

I threw my bag on the bed as I entered my room. I removed my heels and threw it too. I slumped on my bed and sighed.

I know that my parents are not in love with each other. Uso noon sa mayayaman ang arranged marriage at iyon ang nangyari sa kanila. But in my twenty-three years of existence, they did their best to be good parents to me… but these past few weeks, something is off between them. They rarely talk to each other, kung mag-uusap man sila, puro sigawan at away na lang. They are not like this before, siguro nga hindi nila mahal ang isa’t isa pero hindi sila palaging nag-aaway para sa ’kin.

Napailing na lang ako at nag-shower saka nagpalit ng damit. I’ll just have some fun tonight and get wasted. Napapagod ako sa trabaho araw-araw, dumadagdag sa sa iniisip ko sina Mom at Dad.

I looked at myself in the mirror and start applying make up. I wore a silver puff-sleeved velvet mini dress and paired it with a black platform stiletto heels. I look sexy, this outfit is far from my everyday office attire.

I stared at my face again before applying dark red lipstick. Mas kamukha ko talaga si Dad. I also got my naturally dark brown hair from his genes. I have almond-shaped and hazel-colored eyes, perfectly shaped eyebrows, pointed nose, and natural plump lips. Marahil labi lang ang nakuha ko kay Mommy, lahat halos kay Dad na.

Napailing na lang ako at inayos ang buhok ko. My hair is long and naturally wavy, which everyone finds sexy, that’s why I always let it down because it’s one of my asset.

I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror once again and took my black sling bag and my car key. Lumabas na ako ng silid ko pakatapos kong mag-ayos. Natigilan ako nang makita ko si Dad sa living room. He’s sitting on the couch while massaging his temple. Napabuntong hininga na lang ako at lumapit sa kanya.

Dad opened his eyes and looked at me. I just smiled at him and sat beside him. He just smiled back and tapped my shoulder.

“Tomorrow is your birthday, is it okay if we will just have simple dinner? I’m too busy these past few days kaya hindi ko na naasikaso,” Dad said and sighed.

I like this about Dad. He’s my father here in our house but he’s my boss in our company. He’s very professional and doesn’t favor me at work just because I’m his daughter. Madalas ay napapagalitan niya ako sa harap ng mga empleyado ngunit hihingi rin siya ng tawad kapag nasa bahay na kami.

“It’s fine, Dad. I actually plan to take a whole day rest tomorrow and besides, nagsasawa na rin ako sa parties,” I said and chuckled. Dad just nodded while still smiling at me.

“What do you want for your birthday?” he asked and gently caressed my hair.

“Nothing, Dad, gusto ko lang magkaayos na kayo ni Mom. That’s more than enough.”

Napawi ang ngiti sa labi ni Dad dahil sa sinabi ko. He turned his gaze away from me and cleared his throat. There’s really something wrong with them.

“May pupuntahan ka pa yata, go ahead. Be careful, hmm,” Dad said and kissed my forehead.

Tumayo na siya at iniwan akong mag-isa sa sala. Napabuntong hininga na lang ako at agad na lumabas ng bahay. Sumakay na ako ng kotse at agad na pinaharurot iyon.

I just need something to ease my mind right now. Halo halo na sa isip ko ang trabaho pati na rin sina Dad.

I parked my car at CAD Bar’s parking lot. This my favorite bar because I like the ambiance and the loudness, marami ring guwapo. Dito ako madalas nakakadampot ng ka-fling. Most of the male customers here are handsome bachelors.

Pumasok na ako sa bar, agad na sumalubong sa akin ang malakas na tugtog at amoy ng naghalo-halong alak. I just shook my head and go straight to the counter. Napangiti na lang ako nang makitang yung guwapong owner ng bar ang nasa counter.

“Hey, Cadence,” I greeted him. I sat on the stool and put my sling bag on the table. Cad gave me his signature sexy grin.

“Hey, Kiara. Long time, no see,” sabi na lang niya habang nagtitimpla ng drinks.

“Yeah, busy, e. I just came from a business trip. By the way, one Aperol Spritz please,” I said and smiled at him.

“Okay, Miss,” nakangising sabi niya. Napailing na lang ako at pinanood siya sa ginagawa.

Madalang lang kaming magkita ni Cadence dahil bukod sa busy ako lagi, minsan lang din naman siya nagpupunta rito.

Actually, Cad and I had a fling. We made out a lot of times, one thing I like about him is that he’s not into commitments too. We’re just enjoying each other’s company without pressure. Sa lahat ng naka-fling ko, si Cad ang pinaka-paborito ko. Let’s disregard that he’s the most handsome among the guys I flirted, what I like about him is that he’s funny and easy-going.

“Aperol Spritz for a beautiful lady,” Cad said and gave me my drink. I just giggled and shook my head.

“H’wag mo na ’kong bolahin, wala ako sa mood makipag-make out,” napapailing na sabi ko na lang at ininom ang aperol.

“Aw, sayang.” Napakamot siya sa kilay niya. “By the way, what’s bothering you? Medyo pumangit ka dahil mukha kang stressed,” napapailing na sabi pa ni Cad.

I glared at him, he just laughed and pinched my nose. Hinampas ko naman ang kamay niya.

“Nothing, I’m just tired,” I mumbled and drank my aperol.

“Aw, kawawa ka naman. By the way, Kiara, gusto pa sana kitang samahan kaso may kailangan pa ’kong puntahan.” Lumabas si Cad sa counter saka lumapit sa akin. “Just call me if you need something, o kapag nalasing ka. Bye.” He kissed me on my right cheek before he left.

I just shrugged and ordered another drink to another bartender. Hindi ko alam kung gaano ako katagal uminom doon, umalis na lang ako sa counter at umupo sa bandang sulok na parte ng bar nang makaramdam ng hilo.

I’ll just take a rest for a bit before I’ll go home. I should have called Abi to accompany me, malakas ang tolerance ng babaeng ’yon sa alak kaysa sa ’kin.

Napatingin ako sa lalaking katabi ko na kanina pa tahimik. Actually, nauna siya rito, nakiupo lang talaga ako nang hindi nagpapaalam. He didn’t say anything naman. It’s kinda dark here in this area kaya hindi ko maaninag ang mukha niya. He’s wearing a black shirt and a black cap. He’s just silent while drinking his whiskey.

He smells good, I can smell the scent of mint and musk from him. His muscled arms are fully tattooed which I find so attractive. Damn.

“Hey.”

The guy looked at me when I called him. Inilapit ko ang mukha sa kanya upang maaninag ang mukha niya pero blurry na talaga ang paningin ko, dahil siguro sa kalasingan.

“What?” the guy asked in a cold tone. My whole body shivered because of his deep and husky voice. His voice alone is enough to turn me on.

“You’re hot.” Mas lumapit pa ako sa kanya.

Hindi na lang ako pinansin ng lalaki at muling ibinaling ang atensyon niya sa whiskey. Napakunot ang noo ko. Did he just ignore me? Unbelievable.

“Hey.” Kinalabit ko pa ang matigas niyang braso.

I’m not really like this, hindi ako nagfi-first move. Mahirap lang talaga sa ’kin ang makainom, kumakapal ang mukha ko.

“Let’s make out,” I said and touched his arm. Damn, his tattoos are cool.

I sighed when the guy ignored me again. I just pouted and was about to stood up but the guy held my waist and pulled me closer to him. Napasinghap na lang ako nang walang babalang siniil nito ng halik ang labi ko.

I was stunned for awhile but I instantly clung my arms around his nape and responded to his rough kiss.

I moaned against his kiss. Damn, I can taste whiskey and mint from his lips. I kissed him back with equal fervor, I moaned again when he put his tongue inside my mouth tastes its insides. My knees weakened when his hand reached my nape, he pulled my head closer to him and deepened our kiss.

He bit my lower lip and started sucking it. I gripped his nape tightly his hot tongue played with my small one. His hard chest crushed against my soft bossoms. My body shivered when he released a manly groan.

This guy just gave me the best kiss of my life. Cadence is a good kisser but I never felt something like this every time we kissed. This mysterious guy can make me feel something inside my system that I couldn’t explain.

I moaned helplessly when his rough kiss goes down to my jaw. My eyes dilated when his hot tongue ran on my soft skin, his kisses reached my neck. I gripped his hair when he gently bit my skin there. Saglit lang ’yon at muli siyang umangat at hinalikan ang labi ko.

Good thing everyone is busy with their stuffs. Kami lang ang narito sa puwestong ’to kaya walang nakakapansin sa amin, dagdag pa na maingay na talaga sa paligid.

I was gasping for air when the guy finally broke our hot kiss. I gulped as my lips parted in satisfaction. I bet my lips are swollen right now, I can still feel his hot lips and tongue on my neck. Damn, I want more.

I just shook my head and calmed myself. Calm your malanding hormones, Kiara. Baka maibigay ko pa sa lalaking hindi ko kilala ang virginity ko ng wala sa oras… I don’t want that, ni hindi pa nga ako nagkakaroon ng boyfriend.

“Thank you for that amazing and mind-blowing kiss, Sir. I won’t forget that,” I said and took my sling bag.

Hindi ko na siya binalingan ng tingin, agad na ’kong tumayo at iniwan siya ro’n. My heart is still beating faster and my knees are still shaking when I came out of the bar.

I hope I’ll meet that guy again… and I hope I’m not drunk when that happens.

MY FRIENDS and colleagues greeted me on social media, but some of them just texted me. I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror after taking a bath.

I’m now 24 years old, I’m still young but it feels like I’ve already done so many things in my life. I just shook my head and replied to my friends’ greetings to me.

Natigilan ako nang makitang natawag si Cad. Agad ko namang sinagot iyon.

“Hello, Kiarabog. Nakita ko sa facebook na birthday mo ngayon. Ano’ng gusto mong regalo? Ako ba?” Nararamdaman kong nakangisi siya ngayon. Napailing na lang ako.

“No, I want free drinks for the rest of my life.” I chuckled.

“Tang ina, baka naman malugi ang bar ko sa ’yo, girl.”

Natawa na lang ako sa sinabi niya.

“Just kidding, hindi mo na kailangang regaluhan ako.”

“Aw ’no, sige, happy birthday na lang. Punta ka mamaya sa bar kapag

may time ka. Chat ko na lang birthday greeting ko sa ’yo,“ sabi niya na lang.

“Whatever. Sige, bye na.”

Hindi ko na hinintay na sumagot siya at agad ng binaba ang tawag. Lumabas na ako ng kuwarto ko at dumiretso sa dining area, naabutan ko ro’n si Dad na tumutulong kay Manang maghain. Napatingin naman si Dad sa direksyon ko at agad na napangiti.

“Good morning, Kiara. Happy birthday,” Dad greeted. Lumapit siya sa ’kin at niyakap ako.

“Thank you, Dad. Where’s Mom? Is she still in her room?” I asked with concern in my voice. Palagi na lang nagkukulong si Mommy sa kuwarto niya, minsan naman palaging umaalis.

“Take a sit, anak. Ipaghahain kita.”

Dad didn’t answer my question and guided me to my seat. I looked at him with confusion in my eyes. Is it that hard to answer my question? What the hell is happening here?

Natigilan ako nang mag-ring amg phone ko, I instantly answered the call when I saw Mom’s name.

“Hello, Mom. Bakit tumawag ka pa po? Masama ba pakiramdam mo? Pupuntahan kita sa room niyo.” Akmang tatayo na ako nang agad na magsalita si Mom.

“No need, darling. I’m not in the house right now. I’m sorry kung hindi na kita nahintay gumising at umalis ako kaagad.” Napakunot ang noo ko sa sinabi niya.

“Where are you? B-bakit ka po umalis?” kinakabahang tanong ko.

“Maghihiwalay na kami ng Daddy mo, anak.”

Tila binuhusan ako nang malamig na tubig sa sinabi ni Mom. Agad na nanginig ang mga kamay ko kasabay ng panghihina ng mga tuhod ko.

“Is this a prank or what? A-are you doing this to surprise me for my birthday?” I stuttered.

“I’m sorry, Kiara. Actually, three months ago pa naming napag-usapan ’to. Your Dad is also aware that I already have a boyfriend. I’m sorry for telling you this on your birthday, honey. But I really want to be happy this time. I can’t live with your Dad anymore.”

My lips quivered as my vision became blurry. Nabitiwan ko ang phone ko dahil sa panginginig ng kamay ko. Agad na lumapit sa ’kin si Dad at hinawakan ang kamay ko. Inalis ko ang pagkakahawak niya sa kamay ko at agad na napatayo.

“W-why did you let her go just like that, Dad?! And what? She has a boyfriend?! What kind of fuckery is that? Pinaglololoko niyo ba akong lahat?!”

This is probably the first time I shouted on my Dad like this. I’m always a good daughter to them, I thought we’re just fine and living like a happy family but all this time… I’m just the one who think that way. My Mom can’t live with my Dad anymore but how about me? Iiwan niya na lang ako nang gano’n gano’n na lang? For what? For her boyfriend?!

I get it, Mom is just 43 years old, she’s still young and beautiful, 19 lang siya nang mabuntis siya sa akin… pero hindi pa ba siya kuntento sa amin?

“Kiara, this is for the best, anak. Sinubukan naman naming mahalin ang isa’t isa para sa ’yo, pero hindi talaga namin kaya. We’re both done with this setup, we’re not happy anymore. Ayokong pigilan si Akira na magmahal, we never love each other in the first place anyway, Kiara. Just let your Mom be kung doon siya masaya,” Dad said. He seemed unaffected, tila ba wala siyang pakialam sa mga ginagawa ni Mom.

This can’t be, I will never let this family fall apart. Alam ko na kahit papa’no, minahal nila ang isa’t isa, imposibleng hindi!

“Where’s Mom?” I asked. Dad sighed and held my arm.

“Kiara, let’s just–”

“Where the hell is Mom?!” I shouted. I never shouted like this at Dad before. I’ll just apologize to him later, after I talk to Mom.

“She’s in her house, Kiara. You know where it is, right?” Dad asked in a calm tone. Tila ba hindi naiinis sa paninigaw ko.

Agad ko silang iniwan sa dining area at nagtungo sa kuwarto ko para kuhanin ang susi ng kotse ko. I need to talk to Mom right now.

Paano kung hindi katiwa-tiwala ang boyfriend niya? Paano kung lokohin lang siya no’n at perahan? Paano kung killer pala ’yon or what?

My mind is clouded while I’m driving my way to Mom’s villa. Naluluha na naman ako, nanghihina na naman ang buong katawan ko. Why does it have to happen on my birthday? I should be resting right now or having a breakfast with my family. Why does it turned out like this?

Agad akong bumaba ng kotse nang makarating sa sariling bahay ni Mom. Agad kong pinindot ang doorbell, saglit lang ang hinintay ko at pinagbuksan na ako ni Mom.

“K-Kiara, what are you doing here?” Mom asked, she seems shocked. Maybe she didn’t expect that I’ll barge in like this.

“What the hell are you thinking, Mom?! Wala ka na bang pakialam sa akin? Naiintindihan ko na ayaw mo ng kasama si Dad, but how about me, Mom?!”

Mom remained silent, she let out a heavy sigh and held my hands.

“Anak, please understand. I had enough, gusto ko rin namang sumaya,” she pleaded.

“Am I not enough to make you happy?! Bakit kailangan mo pang magka-boyfriend?! Para saan?!”

Hindi nakasagot si Mom, napabuntong hininga na lang siya at tila hindi alam ang sasabihin sa akin.

“What’s happening here, Akira?”

Natigilan kaming pareho at napatingin sa pinanggalingan ng boses. Agad akong natulos sa kinatatayuan ko nang makitang may lalaking lumabas ng bahay ni Mom.

Gano’n na lang ang gulat ko nang mapagtanto kung sino iyon… a man with a magnificent jet black curly hair, strong dark brown eyes, pointed nose, sharp stubbled jaw, sexy luscious lips, and a domineering aura… He’s wearing his typical three piece suit.

“What is this, Mom? What the hell is that man doing here?! Why are you with him?” I asked and turned my gaze at Mom. Mom just sighed and held my arm and caressed it.

Of course I know that man, he’s the owner of Archante Automobile Corp. and ARC airlines… But why the hell is he here? What the fuck is happening here?

“He is Xanthos Archante, Kiara. He’s my boyfriend.”

Chapter Two

My Mom and Xanthos were both quiet as I stare at them. I raised my eyebrow and made myself look intimidating. Mas lalong tumaas ang kilay ko nang hawakan ni Mom ang kamay ng Xanthos na iyon.

Seriously? In front of me? Really?

Sumandal na lang ako sa sandalan ng couch habang nakatitig sa kanila. Ang sakit nila sa matang dalawa, talaga bang ipagpapalit ni Mom si Dad sa lalaking mas bata ng ilang beses sa kanya?

I turned my gaze at Xanthos Archante. He’s still quiet, there’s no hint of emotion in his eyes, as usual, as if he’s not intimidated nor affected by my presence. It’s not surprising, that’s what made him a well-known businessman.

Xanthos is incredibly attractive, I honestly don’t like men with beard or stubble, but this man is probably an exception, he looks so handsome and manly with his stubble. He’s kinda light-skinned but it suits him well.

I just cleared my throat and straightened my back, why am I admiring him in my mind? I just shook my head.

“So, makikipaghiwalay ka kay Dad para sa lalaking ’yan? Are you for real, Mom? Ang bata bata pa niyan!” I exclaimed and pointed her boyfriend.

I’m always calm, I rarely lose my composure but I really lose it this time knowing that Mom’s boyfriend is way younger than her. Sobrang naiinis ako!

“You’re exaggerated, she’s just nine years older than me. Besides, who gives a fuck about age gap nowadays?” he asked in a kinda mocking tone. I just glared at him.

So, he’s 34 years old, huh.

“I’m not talking to you, Mr. Archante.” My eyebrow shot up. I’m not a bitch, but this ridiculous situation is making me.

Kung iba lang ang boyfriend ni Mama, sasabihin kong pineperahan siya nito… but damn, he’s Xanthos Archante. Is that means he’s really in love with my Mom? I mean no, that’s absurd. Bakit Mommy ko pa? Ang daming babae riyan, bakit sa may pamilyang tao pa siya pumatol?

“Anak.” Lumapit sa akin si Mom at umupo sa tabi ko. “Please understand, I just want to be happy this time. Of course, you are my happiness, but I want to be happy as a woman too. Your father agreed because we both know our relationship didn’t work out in the first place. Just accept it, anak. We will sign the divorce papers next week. Nasa sa ’yo naman ang desisyon kung kanino sa amin mo gustong sumama. Hindi naman porke’t maghihiwalay na kami ng Dad mo, hindi mo na kami magulang. Please, h’wag ka namang magalit sa ’kin, ’nak. I just want to love and to be happy.”

Natahimik ako sa sinabi ni Mom. Of course, I want her to be happy… but not this way. Hindi niya ba kayang sumaya sa piling namin ni Dad? Sa lalaking ’to lang ba talaga siya sasaya?

“Gaano na kayo katagal ng lalaking ’yan?” tanong ko at itinuro si Xanthos.

“Anak,” tila nananaway na sabi ni Mom.

“Just answer me, Mom.”

She sighed before answering my question.

“Four months.” Mom avoided my gaze.

I licked my lower lip to calm myself. Mas lalong nangitngit ang kalooban ko… four fucking months, ganoon na pala katagal. Kaya naman pala palagi siyang wala sa bahay.

I looked at Xanthos. I just sighed and rolled my eyes. I need some time to think first, kapag kinausap ko pa sila ngayon ay baka mag-init lang ang ulo ko.

I stood up and took my car key.

“I’ll take my leave. Mag-uusap ulit tayo bukas, Mom…” I looked at Xanthos. “…and you, I will never accept you for my Mom.”

He didn’t say anything nor reacted with what I’ve said. Muli akong napairap at tinalikuran na lang sila pagkasabi ko no’n. Dali dali akong lumabas ng bahay ni Mom at sumakay sa kotse ko.

What a great birthday gift.

---

“Saan ka pupunta, anak?”

Natigilan ako at napatingin kay Dad nang akmang lalabas na ako ng bahay. Agad siyang lumapit sa ’kin at hinawakan ang kamay ko.

Dad seemed to be worried about me. I understand him, buong araw akong nagkulong sa kuwarto. Ngayon lang ako lumabas dahil pupunta ako sa bar ni Cad.

I sighed and gave my Dad a faint smile. Oo nga’t naiinis ako, pero ayaw ko naman na pag-alalahin pa si Dad.

“Don’t mind me, Dad. I just want to have some fun for a bit. Don’t worry, I won’t be a rebellious daughter like what you have in mind right now. I just need to ease this frustration. Don’t worry about me. Bye, Dad, I love you.” I gave him a peck on his cheeks. Dad just sighed and nodded.

“I love you too, please take care.”

Nginitian ko na lang si Dad bago ako tuluyang lumabas ng bahay. Agad akong sumakay sa kotse. Kinuha ko ang phone ko para mag-leave ng message kay Cadence. Natigilan ako nang mapansing may message pala siya sa ’kin. Hindi ko na nabasa dahil umiyak at natulog lang ako buong araw sa kuwarto ko.

Cadence: Hbd, mbtc, tc, imy, ily… Kiss na lang pala regalo ko sayo. Punta ka sa bar mamaya. Mwah mwah tsup tsup!

Natatawang napailing na lang ako at muling ibinalik ang phone sa pouch ko. Pinaandar ko na rin agad ang kotse at hindi na ni-reply-an pa si Cad, papunta na rin naman ako ro’n.

My mind was preoccupied the whole day, buti nga at nagawa ko pang makatulog. My Mom called me several times but I didn’t answer, I don’t wanna talk to her yet, baka may masabi lang akong masakit sa kanya. Siguro nga naiinis ako sa kanya ngayon, but she’s still my Mom.

“Kiarabog, here!”

Napangiti na lang ako nang makita si Cad sa counter. Agad akong lumapit sa kanya saka umupo sa stool. Cadence leaned closer and gave me a peck on my lips.

“Mukhang badtrip ka na naman ah, anyare ba, sis?” tanong ni Cadence saka muling bumalik sa pagtitimpla ng drinks.

“Maghihiwalay na parents ko,” tipid na sagot ko at inilapag ang pouch sa hita ko. Napangiwi na lang si Cadence.

“Ayos ka lang?” he asked and gave me a drink. Agad kong kinuha ’yon at ininom ng isang tunggaan.

“Malamang hindi… at alam mo ba? Halos ka-edad mo lang ang ipinalit ni Mom kay Dad. Mas lalong nakakainis! Give me another drink,” I said and let out a heavy sigh.

Cadence gave me another drink, lumabas siya ng counter at lumapit sa ’kin. Hinawakan niya ang kamay ko at hinila ako papunta sa VIP room. Nagpatianod na lang ako dahil gusto ko rin naman ng privacy. I like the loud noise from this place but not this time, wala ako sa mood.

Cadence sat on the red couch. Hinila niya ako paupo sa kandungan niya saka humawak sa baywang ko. Yumakap na lang ako sa batok niya. Cadence really knows how to comfort me with his simple gestures. I can say that he’s my only boy-friend, well, we kiss and make out a lot, but I consider him as my friend.

“Kwento na, makikinig ako. Nakaka-pogi raw kapag gentleman yung lalaki tapos palaging nakikinig,” nakangising sabi pa niya. Hinampas ko na lang ang dibdib niya at tiningnan siya nang masama.

“You’re not helping,” I said and raised my eyebrow. Cadence let out a manly chuckle and gently squeezed my waist.

“Hindi na, sige na, ano ba ’yon? Make kwento, sis.”

I sighed and rolled my eyes. I’m here to forget my family issue for a while but he wants me to make kwento. Sapakin ko na lang kaya siya?

“Basta, Mom’s new boyfriend is pissing me off. He’s so young, he’s handsome too and effin’ hot. Hindi lang ’yon, he’s absolutely rich. Bakit sa dinami-dami ng babae si Mom pa ang pinatulan niya? I mean, pamilyadong tao ang Mommy ko, naninira siya ng pamilya. Bakit hindi na lang siya sa single pumatol?” pag-aalburoto ko. Napangisi na lang si Cadence.

“Kanino? Sa ’yo?” natatawamg tanong niya. I smacked his chest again.

“I’m serious here, Cadence Lettiere.” Pinaningkitan ko siya ng mga mata.

Cad just shook his head and scratched his thick eyebrow. Saglit pa ay naging seryoso ang mukha niya na minsan ko lang makita, seryosong tumitig siya sa mga mata ko.

“I understand what you’re feeling right now… pero sa tingin ko, dapat hayaan mo na lang ang parents mo. Mukhang desidido na talaga silang maghiwalay, saka palagi mong naku-kuwento sa ’kin na wala na talaga silang gana sa isa’t isa. Saka wala naman siguro masama kung magmamahal ulit ang Mommy mo, ’di ba?”

Napaismid na lang ako sa sinabi niya, naiinis ako dahil may punto ang mga sinabi niya… pero naiinis pa rin talaga ako. I can’t accept that just like that. I know I still can do something about this situation.

“Akala ko ba sa ’kin ka kampi?” nakasimangot na tanong ko kay Cadence. Natawa na lang siya saka pinitik ang noo ko.

“H’wag ka ngang ano riyan, doon ako palagi sa tama, sa kabutihan palagi ang side ko… Gano’n akong klaseng tao, Kiara,” nakangiting sabi ni Cad saka tinapik-tapik pa ang dibdib niya. Napairap na lang ako.

“Ewan ko sa’yo.”

Natahimik na lang ako at napatulala… that man, Xanthos Archante, I will never accept him for my Mom. I will do everything just to make him back off. Kahit ano yata ay gagawin ko mawala lang siya sa buhay ni Mom.

“Sino ba ’yang boyfriend ng Mommy mo?” Cad asked. I just rolled my eyes and shook my head.

“He ain’t important,” sagot ko na lang. Cad just shrugged off and didn’t ask me again.

“Ano na’ng plano mo?” tanong niya. Natigilan ako nang maramdaman kong bumababa ang kamay niya sa legs ko. Hinampas ko naman ang kamay niya.

“I don’t know, that’s why I’m here. I need your advice,” I said and encircled my arms around his nape.

“My advice won’t change. Just let them be, malaki ka na naman, e. Hayaan mo ng maging malaya ang parents mo,” he said and pinched my nose. My eyes narrowed with his remark.

“That’s not what I want to hear, Cad. Bigyan mo ako ng tips kung paano ko aalisin sa landas ni Mom ang lalaking ’yon,” I said as my eyebrows puckered.

“Kill him,” he instantly responded.

Nasamid naman ako sa isinagot niya.

“Hindi ’yan! Yung maayos kasi,” naiiritang sabi ko at kinurot ang tagiliran niya. Natatawang napangiwi na lang siya.

“Ano pa ba? E ’di inisin mo. Bwisitin mo hanggang sa siya na mismo ang umalis sa landas niyo. Tibayan mo lang kasi baka bumaligtad ang sitwasyon at ikaw pa ang mainis niya.”

Napatitig ako kay Cadence. Cad’s brows drew together. I stared at him and my lips parted when an idea comes to my mind. Agad akong napatayo sa kandungan niya habang may malaking ngiti sa labi.

“Thanks for your advice, Cad! I know what to do now…” I said and held my chin. Cad remained staring at me, waiting for what I will say next. “…I will seduce him.”

Napaubo si Cadence sa sinabi ko. Agad niyang kinuha ang drinks na nasa table at tinungga ’yon habang nauubo pa rin.

“Tang ina ba? Hindi naman ’yon ’yung advice ko, e.” Cadence complained and scratched his nape.

“Kahit na, you still gave me a wonderful idea.” A sweet smile plastered on my face.

“Pag-isipan mo muna, paano kung ma-fall ka ro’n kagaya ng sa mga wattpad,” sabi niya saka napasimangot.

“What the hell is that?” I asked in confusion. Cadence just chuckled handsomely.

“Di mo alam ’yon? Ang boring naman ng buhay mo, girl. Magbasa ka ng stories sa wattpad para malaman mo kahihinatnan mo sa pina-plano mo,” tila nanenermong sabi niya. Inismiran ko na lang siya.

“I know what I’m doing. Wala ka bang tiwala sa ’kin? I’m a seductress. No one can resist me, Cadence, you know that, right?” I gave him a sexy smirk.

Sumandal si Cad sa sandalan ng couch saka napangisi.

“Couldn’t agree more… Hay, dapat pala ako na lang ang naging boyfriend ng Mommy mo para ako ang aakitin mo,” nakangising sabi niya saka tumayo at yumakap sa baywang ko.

“Shut up… By the way, I’ll go ahead. I’ll start planning now, bukas na lang ulit. Bye!” I gave him a peck on his cheek and stormed out of the room. Hindi maalis ang ngiti sa labi ko habang naglalakad palabas ng bar.

Bakit ngaton ko lang naisip ito? Xanthos Archante… I’ll make sure he’ll be a prisoner of my charms.

---

“OMG, he’s a real hottie, Kiara! Your Mom absolutely hit the jackpot!” Abi squealed on the other line. I just told her about Xanthos and she immediately searched about him on the internet. Kilig na kilig tuloy siya.

“Stop reacting as if he’s the most handsome man alive,” naiinis na sabi ko habang inilalagay ang mga damit ko sa maleta.

“Are you really gonna seduce this almost perfect man? I mean, you’re beautiful, but this man can make your panty dropped in any ways possible… Ako na lang kaya ang umakit sa kanya? Gano’n din naman ’yon, ’di ba? Saka may Kuya Archer ka na nga, may Cadence ka rin, tapos gusto mo rin ’tong Xanthos na ’to. Aba, pinagpala ka sa lahat… Sige na, Kiara, gagalingan ko.” Napahagikhik pa siya.

“Ewan ko sa ’yo. Sige na, I have to go, let’s just talk again later. Bye,” sabi ko na lang at agad na ibinaba ang tawag. Kinuha ko ang maleta ko at agad na lumabas ng room ko. Naabutan ko si Dad na naghihintay sa akin sa living room.

Agad na lumapit sa ’kin si Dad saka napabuntong hininga. Tutol talaga siya sa desisyon kong ’to ngunit hinayaan na lang ako.

“Always take care, Kiara, and please, always visit me here.” Dad caressed my hair and smiled faintly at me. I smiled back and held his hand.

“Babalik din naman ako, Dad. Just give me three months, babalik ako rito together with Mom.” Napawi ang ngiti niya. Napailing na lang siya.

“I don’t know what you’re planning, anak. But I hope you’ll realize and finally understand everything as you stay there with your Mom.”

I don’t know what he meant by that. Hindi ko na lamang pinansin ’yon at nagpaalam na sa kanya saka umalis.

Mom doesn’t know that I’ll be staying there with them from now on. I want to surprise them, especially that assh-le, Xanthos Archante.

I’m sure I can make him surrender… Siguro nga ay guwapo siya, pero hindi ako bibigay ng basta na lang dahil lang do’n. Siya ang matatalo.

Agad akong bumaba ng kotse nang makarating na ako sa bahay ni Mom. Kinuha ko ang maleta ko mula sa kotse saka pinindot ang doorbell. Ilang saglit lang ay nagbukas na ang gate.

Natigilan ako nang si Xanthos ang bumungad sa akin. He’s wearing a white long sleeve shirt and pajamas, his hair is disheveled. Mukhang kagigising niya lang. Agad na napataas ang kilay ko.

“Why the hell are you here? Bakit dito ka ba nakatira kay Mom?!”

Xanthos remained emotionless.

“I don’t have anything to explain,” he said and was about to turn his back at me but I immediately grabbed his arm.

“I’m still your girlfriend’s daughter, Mr. Archante. I have all the rights to know everything about my mother, right?” I asked and raised my eyebrow.

Hindi nagsalita si Xanthos at tinalikuran na lang ako saka muling pumasok sa loob. Napaawang na lang ang labi ko sa ginawa niya. Is he for real?!

Naiinis na pumasok na lang din ako sa loob ng bahay.

“Mom!” I shouted.

Mom immediately came out from the kitchen. She’s still wearing an apron, may hawak pa siyang sandok kaya alam kong nagluluto siya.

Halatang natigilan siya nang makita ang maletang dala ko. I just gave her a sweet smile and tapped my luggage.

“You said I can choose where I want to stay, right, Mom? Nakapili na ako, I will stay here, Mom,” I said and slumped on the couch.

Xanthos sat on the couch in front of me but he didn’t even glance at me. Kumuha siya ng diyaryo at binuksan iyon saka nagbasa. Napairap na lang ako sa kanya.

“A-are you sure, anak?” Mom asked. I know she’s shocked, galit na galit ako kahapon kaya alam ko na nakakagulat talaga ang desisyon kong ’to.

“Don’t worry, Mom. Hindi naman ako maninira ng sweet momemts niyo ng lalaking ’yan,” I said and pointed Xanthos who’s currently not giving a fuck about what’s happening.

He’s so stiff, mukhang wala man lang sweetness sa katawan. Paano ba nagustuhan ni Mommy ang lalaking ’to?

“Kiara Amaris,” tila nananaway na sabi ni Mom. Napairap na lang ako.

“Just let me stay here, Mom,” I said and pouted my lips. Napabuntong hininga na lang si Mom at tumango.

“Okay, you can stay at the room upstairs. Yung kuwarto na dati mong tinulugan dito. Babalik na ’ko sa niluluto ko,” sabi ni Mommy saka muling bumalik sa kusina.

I crossed my legs while staring at Xanthos. He’s not looking at me and he seems so engaged with the news he’s reading, mukhang hindi talaga siya interesado sa akin. Is that fucking news more amusing than me? Impossible.

Natigilan siya nang hablutin ko ang newspaper mula sa kanya. I threw it beside me and stared at him. Hindi naman siya nagpatalo at nakipaglabanan din ng titig sa akin.

His dark brown eyes are beautiful. I always admire green and blue-eyed men… but Xanthos looks hot and manly with his dark brown eyes.

“So… We’re gonna live under the same roof now, right, Mr. Archante?” I asked and smiled sweetly at him.

Xanthos remained emotionless like he doesn’t give a fuck about me. That pisses me off.

“Hmm, since you’re my Mom’s boyfriend, what should I call you? Mr. Archante is too formal, right?”

“Mr. Archante is fine,” he muttered. Damn, he really has a deep sexy voice.

“No it’s not… Should I call you Kuya? Tito? Uncle? Hmm, how about…” I seductively touched my lower lip and gave him a sexy smirk.

“…Daddy.”

Chapter Three

“So, what happened? Ano’ng reaksyon nila nung pumunta ka?”

I continued putting my clothes in the huge closet while listening to Cadence through my AirPods. Tsismis kaagad ang bungad ng lalaking ’to imbis na kumustahin ako. Grabe talaga.

“Mom was shocked, maybe she didn’t expect that I’ll choose to stay here… and about his hot boyfriend, I called him daddy… and his reaction? Nothing.” Napaismid ako bago isinara ang closet nang marinig kong humagalpak ng tawa si Cad sa kabilang linya.

“Grabe, sino ba ’yon ha? Idol ko na ’yon, pinakamatatag na lalaki sa Pinas,” natatawang sabi nito.

“Damn him, wala ba siyang pakiramdam?!” naiinis na tanong ko saka umupo sa kama.

“Baka naman he’s really into older women kaya wala kang epekto sa kanya o baka naman he finds your mother hotter than you, I mean, to be honest, Tita Akira is beautiful. Akala ko nga nasa 30s lang siya noong una ko siyang nakita.”

I just let out a heavy sigh and closed my eyes. Paano ko pa masisira ang relasyon nila kung ganoong ka-loyal ang Xanthos na ’yon?

“Ang hirap ’di ba? Sumuko ka na lang at hayaan sila.”

Napailing ako sa sinabi ni Cad kahit hindi niya ako nakikita.

“No, I know that man has his weak point,” I said and stood up. I heard Cadence sighed.

“Tigas talaga ng ulo mo ’no? Mas matigas pa sa ulo ko sa baba.”

I just rolled my eyes.

“Mas matigas pa rin ang ulo mo sa baba, ’yan lang pinapagana mo, e,” natatawang sabi ko na lang.

“Aw, grabe. Salamat na lang sa lahat ha, Kiara,” pagda-drama niya.

“Whatever. Sige, bye na. Bukas na lang ulit.”

“Bye, punta ka sa bar bukas ha.”

“Hmm,” sabi ko na lang saka tumango. Binaba ko na rin kaagad ang tawag saka tuluyang humiga sa kama.

Inabot na ako ng gabi sa pag-aayos ng bago kong kuwarto. My previous room is way better than this one, pero hindi na rin naman masama. There’s a huge closet and TV. Wala nga lang sariling bathroom, but okay na rin.

Natigilan ako nang makarinig ng katok sa silid ko. I stood up and opened the door. Napapitlag na lang ako nang si Xanthos ang bumungad sa akin, as usual, there’s no hint of emotion in his eyes again.

Ano ba ang nagustuhan ni Mom sa kanya bukod sa guwapo siya?

“Hey, what’s up?”

I grinned at him and playfully traced my fingers on his hard chest. Natigilan lang ako nang hablutin niya ang kamay ko saka pabalyang inilayo sa dibdib niya.

What a rough man.

“It’s time for dinner, Akira wants you to join us,” tipid na sabi niya saka agad din akong tinalikuran at iniwan ako.

Napailing na lang ako at sumunod sa kanya. This man is a living thrill, his actions just excites me even more.

“Kiara, take a sit,” Mom said while serving food on the table.

I just smiled at her and sat on the chair. Si Xanthos naman ay umupo na sa tapat ko, si Mom ang nasa pagitan naming dalawa.

“Inabot ka na ng gabi sa kuwarto mo, malamang napagod ka. Take a rest after this. H’wag ka munang pumasok bukas sa trabaho,” sabi ni Mom. Napatango na lang ako.

“Actually, I’m on a vacation leave and–”

Natigilan ako nang mapansing ipinaghahain pa ni Mom si Xanthos. My eyebrow instantly raised. I just smiled bitterly and shook my head.

“Bakit ipinaghahain mo pa ’yan? He has his own hands,” I muttered and rolled my eyes.

“Kiara,” tila nananaway na sabi ni Mom. Napaismid na lang ako at nagsimula ng kumain.

Kung alam ko lang na ganito ang makikita ko, hindi na lang sana ako sumabay sa kanila kumain.

“Kiara, matagal mo ng kilala si Xanthos, ’di ba?” Mom asked and smiled at me. I gave her a bitter smile and nodded. “Xanthos, kilala mo na ba si Kiara noon? Mataas ang posisyon n’ya sa NTC,” my Mom said proudly.

“I don’t remember her,” tipid na sagot niya ni Xanthos. Agad na napataas ang kilay ko.

This man, how can he forget me just like that?! Ilang beses niya akong pinahiya kada may business proposal ako sa kanya. Wala siyang tinanggap na business proposal ko kahit isa. I hate how he doubted my capabilities every time he opens his shitty mouth. Xanthos Archante will be our best client if he just accepted even one of my proposals. Totoo talaga ang chismis na napaka-strikto at mapili ng Xanthos na iyan.

Natigilan ako nang masanggi ng paa ko ang binti n’ya. Halatang natigilan din siya. Napangisi na lang ako nang may kalokohang pumasok sa isip ko.

I ran my toe on his leg gently. My toe went higher until it reached his knee. I looked at him to see his reaction. Natigilan ako nang mapansing tila wala lang sa kanya ang ginagawa ko. He remained emotionless and unbothered.

“What do you want for dessert, Kiara? Cake or muffin?”

Natigilan lang ako sa ginagawa nang magtanong si Mom. Napatikhim na lang ako at umayos ng upo.

“I don’t like sweets, Mom. Don’t you know that?” I asked with a hint of resentment in my voice.

“Oh, sorry, honey. Nawala sa isip ko,” hinging-paumanhin ni Mom saka nilagay sa sink ang mga plato.

How can she forget that? Dumating lang ang Xanthos na ’to sa buhay n’ya parang kulang na lang makalimutan n’yang may anak siya. Xanthos is bad influence to my mother. Dapat mawala na siya sa buhay ni Mom.

Mom was about to wash the dishes but her phone rang.

“Xanthos, ikaw muna maghugas ng mga plato, pwede? Kakausapin ko lang ang investor,” sabi ni Mom habang pinupunasan ang kamay niya.

Xanthos nodded and stood up. Lumapit siya sa sink upang ituloy ang paghuhugas ng mga plato. Mom answered the call and left the dining room.

Under ba ’tong si Xanthos kay Mom? I can’t believe it. He looks domineering and has authoritative aura at work but he’s actually like this? Damn, it annoys me.

Tumayo ako at kumuha ng baso para uminom ng tubig. Pagkainom ko, inilagay ko ang baso sa sink.

“Pakisabay na rin ’to,” I said and smiled sweetly at him. Xanthos didn’t react and just continued washing the dishes.

Xanthos is indeed a tall man, ngayong halos magkadikit kami, kitang kita ko ang difference ng height naming dalawa… and he smells awesomely good too.

His black curly hair caught my attention. His hair looks shiny and soft. Mukhang natural ding kulot ang mga ’yon.

Xanthos froze when I gently stroked his curly hair. Agad naman siyang kumilos at umatras nang kaunti sa akin. An evil smile plastered on my face when he finally looked at me.

“What are you doing?” he asked as his forehead creased.

“I’m curious, is your hair naturally curly?” I asked and smiled at him.

Muli na lang ibinaling ni Xanthos ang atensyon sa mga pinggan.

“I’m not obligated to answer that,” he muttered. I just rolled my eyes and hissed.

“Do you have plans to marry my mother?” I asked out of curiosity.

“I’m not obligated to–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“Of course you are obligated to tell me. I’m asking you right now as your girlfriend’s daughter… I think I’m obligated to know, right?” I asked and raised my eyebrow.

Xanthos looked at me, I almost taken aback when our eyes met. I think I won’t be able to stare at his eyes longer than three seconds. His stare makes me weak for some unknown reason.

“Why do you want to know? You’re against it anyway,” he said and continued washing the dishes again.

“Just answer me, do you really have plans on marrying my Mom?”

Xanthos sighed heavily. He looked at me before answering my question.

“Of course I do, young lady. I won’t fuck everything up in my life for nothing. I’m serious about Akira, I don’t give a shit if you believe it or not, or if you don’t want me for her.” He continued washing the dishes. “I don’t play around so stop wasting your time on me.”

I remained silent and just stared at him. I was stunned, ito na yata ang pinakamahabang nasabi n’ya sa ’kin… his words are kinda harsh, but here I am, admiring the side view of his face, his pointed nose and sharp jaw are to die for.

“Wow, you two are getting close, huh.”

Agad akong napaatras kay Xanthos nang marinig ko ang boses ni Mom. I just looked at her and smiled. Tila pabirong hinampas ko ang braso ni Xanthos. Damn hard.

“I just want to know your boyfriend more, Mom.”

Umalis na lang ako ng dining room at agad na nagtungo sa silid ko. Wala sana akong balak magpunta sa bar ni Cad ngayon pero nagbago na ang isip ko. Xanthos is stressing me out. Why is he so difficult to deal with? Mukhang ni hindi siya naaapektuhan sa akin, talaga bang loyal siya kay Mom?

Nagbihis na ako ng pang-alis saka agad na lumabas ng kwarto ko. Tinext ko na rin si Abi na samahan ako sa bar ni Cad tutal palagi naman siyang may time.

My mind’s still clouded on my way to Cad’s bar. My mind is filled with thoughts about Xanthos and how I will break them apart. Kung katulad sana ni Cadence ang naging boyfriend ni Mom, hindi ako mahihirapang paghiwalayin sila.

Nauna na si Abi sa akin sa bar, naabutan ko siyang kakwentuhan si Cadence. Lumapit na lang ako sa table nila at umupo sa tabi ni Abi.

“Hey girl, mukha kang pinagsakluban ng heaven and hell,” Abi said and chuckled. I just rolled my eyes at her.

“Akala ko bukas ka pa pupunta, sis?” tanong ni Cad.

“I’m in a bad mood,” I mumbled and massaged my temple.

“Why? Failed ba ang mission mo na akitin yung future step-dad mo?” natatawang tanong ni Abi. Naiinis na hinampas ko na lang ang braso n’ya.

“Sino ba kasi ’yang future step-dad n’ya?” tanong ni Cad.

“Ah, he’s Xan–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin ni Abi.

“Stop, I don’t even wanna hear that name,” I muttered with gritting teeth. “Damn, why is he so hard to deal with? This shit should be easy as pie, I’ll seduce him, he’ll give in, and then it’s over… And fuck, he said he has plans to marry my Mom! Is he for real?!” Kulang na lang ay itaob ko ang mesa sa inis na ngayon ko lang nailabas.

“If he seems serious about his feelings for your Mom, why don’t you just give up? May mga lalaki naman talagang tulad niya, e,” Abi remarked. I sighed and stroked my hair using my fingers.

“No, kailangan nilang maghiwalay ni Mom.”

I can’t let them be, maybe Xanthos is just confused or what. Why my Mom of all people? I can’t let them be together. Hindi ko maaatim.

“Hayaan mo na lang sila, maghihiwalay rin naman sila panigurado dahil walang forever,” sabi ni Cad.

“Correct ka riyan,” sabi naman ni Abi at nakipag-apir kay Cadence. Napairap na lang ako.

What should I do? Should I really just give up?

---

“Ganito na lang, Kiarabog. Tingnan mo na lang kung talagang sincere ’yang boyfriend ni Tita Akira. Kapag mukha namang sincere talaga, e ’di give up ka na lang.”

I let out a heavy sigh and looked at myself in the mirror. I’m wearing a terno sportswear, may mini gym dito si Mom. Baka kahit papa’no kumalma ang isip ko habang nagwo-workout.

“Honestly, I don’t give a fuck if he’s sincere or not. Ayaw ko pa rin sa kanya for Mom sincere man siya o hindi. I want my parents back together, it won’t happen if that man is still in my Mom’s life.”

Itinali ko ang buhok ko at lumabas na ng silid ko pagkatapos kong makipag-usap kay Cadence. Kagabi pa bumabagabag sa isip ko ang mga advice sa ’kin nina Cad at Abi.

Should I just give up and let them be? Xanthos seems serious about Mom. Hindi naman siguro niya papasukin ang ganitong sitwasyon kung hindi. He’s handsome as hell, he’s incredibly rich too, and he’s undeniably intelligent… He has all the qualities of a perfect man. He doesn’t even need Mom’s money or connection. Kaya ano pa ba’ng dahilan kung bakit siya nasa tabi ni Mom?

It’s pretty obvious… he’s sincere.

I just sighed and put the towel on my nape. Nagtungo na ako sa mini gym, natigilan ako nang makita si Xanthos sa treadmill. He’s just wearing a short, he’s freakin’ topless.

My lips parted when I saw his muscular and fully tattooed body. His arms and his bare back are fully tattooed. Nakatalikod siya sa puwesto ko kaya hindi ko nakikita ang harapan niya, but I bet he has tattoos there too… Hindi halata sa hitsura niya na marami siyang tattoos sa katawan. Well, he always wears business suit or long sleeves, ngayon ko lang nakita ang katawan n’ya nang ganito. His body was ripped all over, pero hindi naman sobra katulad ng sa mga bouncer sa bar.

He has a huge dragon tattoo on his back, may Hebrew characters din doon at iba’t ibang klaseng characters and images na hindi ko matukoy ang meaning. He has lots of tattoos pero hindi ’yon makalat tingnan, maayos ang pagkaka-tattoo sa kanya. Actually, his tattoos make him hotter and sexier. I appreciate tattoos ever since because I think it’s a wonderful art, but I never thought I will find someone’s tattoos sexy and hot.

Napailing na lang ako at pasimpleng lumapit sa kanya. Saglit na napatingin naman siya sa ’kin ngunit umiwas din agad ng tingin.

“Can I use the treadmill after?” I asked and smiled at him even though he’s not looking at me.

He stopped the treadmill without saying anything. Umalis na siya sa treadmill at umupo sa upuan. Kinuha niya ang towel na nakasabit sa sandalan ng upuan saka nagsimulang punasan ang pawis n’ya.

Napailing na lang ako, he’s so cold and distant. No one ignores me like he does, pakiramdam ko may nakakahawang sakit ako kung iwasan n’ya.

Is he that loyal to my Mom? I mean, no one can resist me, I can steal someone’s boyfriend with just a simple wink. Kahit yata maghubad ako sa harapan ng Xanthos na ’to, hindi n’ya ako papansinin.

Napabuntong hininga ako at lumapit sa kanya. Natigilan si Xanthos sa pagpunas at napatingin sa ’kin. His thick eyebrow shot up as he looked at me.

“Do you really love my Mom?” I asked in a soft voice.

“I woudn’t be here if I don’t,” he answered blandly. I sighed and bit my lower lip. Damn it.

Fine, I’ll give up.

“Do you still have anything to say or ask?” Xanthos asked as if he’s wasting his precious time just by looking at me.

“Wala na,” tipid na sagot ko at napaiwas na lang ng tingin sa kanya.

Xanthos stood up and nodded. Natigilan ako nang mapadako ang tingin ko sa kaliwang braso niya. His tattoos there, why does it feel like I’ve seen those tattoos before? The unique design of skulls and a compass, his left arm is fully tattooed with that design… I’m sure I’ve seen it before.

Akmang lalabas na ng mini gym si Xanthos nang tuluyan ng pumasok sa isip ko ang pilit kong inaalala… Naaalala ko na.

“Xanthos!”

Lumapit ako sa kanya. Natigilan naman siya nang harapin ko siya saka ngumiti nang matamis sa kanya. I took the towel from him and gently wiped the sweat on his neck. Halatang natigilan siya sa ginawa ko.

“Thank goodness I saw your tattoos,” I said seductively. Bumaba sa matipunong dibdib n’ya ang kamay ko at ’yon naman ang pinunasan ko.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asked in a cold tone and gripped my wrist, stopping me from wiping his hard chest.

“I was about to give up, Xanthos. Good thing I saw these tattoos,” I muttered and held his muscled arm. I ran my fingers there and smiled at him.

Napakunot namab ang noo ni Xanthos sa sinabi ko.

“That night when you kissed me at the bar, you already cheated on my Mom, Xanthos.” An evil smirk plastered on my face.

Halatang natigilan si Xanthos ngunit nanatili siyang walang emosyon habang nakikipaglabanan ng titig sa ’kin.

“You’re not a decent loyal boyfriend to my Mom after all, huh. You even kissed me that night as if you don’t have a girlfriend.” I mumbled and ran my fingers on his chest. Tila wala na ’kong pakialam kahit dumating pa si Mom at makita kami. Mas maganda nga ’yon, e.

I finally have a reason to keep on seducing him… Tingnan lang natin kung hanggang saan siya tatagal.

Chapter Four

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he mumbled and turned his back on me. I crossed my arms over my chest and raised my eyebrow.

“Of course, hindi mo naman aaminin na totoo ’yon. But I don’t care, sigurado ako na ikaw ang naka-make out ko sa bar,” sabi ko saka muli siyang hinarap. I wanna see his reaction.

As usual, he looks cool about it. Mukha ngang hindi siya kinakabahan sa nalaman ko. He’s just staring at me as if what I’ve said wasn’t a big deal. I sighed and bit my lower lip… He excites me more now. Malakas ang pakiramdam ko na nasa loob ang kulo ng isang ’to. He’s just fighting it. I’m sure.

“You’re just being delusional,” he said blandly.

Hinablot n’ya ang t-shirt niya na nasa isang upuan saka sinuot ’yon. Napataas na lang ang kilay ko. Akmang lalabas na siya ng gym pero agad ko siyang hinarangan. Napakunot naman ang noo n’ya sa ginawa ko.

I guess he’s still a human after all, even his simple reactions are cute. Until now I’m still wondering how Mom fell for this emotionless man. Kahit yata tutukan siya ng baril, hindi siya magre-react.

“Do you really think you can get away with it, Xanthos?”

Xanthos remained silent.

“Why are you making it a big deal? If I really kissed you then sorry to burst your bubbles but I can’t recall that anymore. For sure I was just drunk when that happened. Just forget about it,” he said and held my arm and pulled me away from the door.

Lumabas na siya ng gym pero agad ko naman siyang sinundan. Damn working out, this man is more important to deal with. I won’t let him get away with it.

I held his arm to stop him from walking away. He took a deep breath and faced me again. Sa pagkakataong ’to, mukhang naiinis na talaga siya. But I’m not scared. Sa aming dalawa, siya ang dapat matakot.

“What the hell do you want?” mariing tanong niya at marahas na binawi ang braso mula sa pagkakahawak ko.

“You’re a cheater,” I muttered with gritting teeth and pushed his chest.

“I don’t have time with your games. Pinagpapasensyahan lang kita dahil anak ka ni Akira. Don’t make me lose it, Kiara,” he mumbled while looking directly at my eyes. His eyes scream authority and dominance.

Pakiramdam ko nagtayuan ang lahat ng balahibo sa katawan ko nang banggitin n’ya ang pangalan ko. I find my name ordinary, nothing special… but hearing it from him makes my name more pleasing to hear.

A smirk formed on my lips. I bit my lower lip and held his arm gently. I felt his strong and hard muscles there. I think his arms are enough to crush my whole body… Now, I’m turned on.

“Am I a bad girl?” I asked in a seductive tone. My hand goes down until it reached the hem of his shirt. Tila nanunuksong ipinasok ko ang kamay ko sa loob ng t-shirt niya. Nanatiling nakatitig sa akin si Xanthos. I can’t read what’s on his mind right now. He’s just staring at me with the usual look in his eyes.

“You’re indeed a bad girl,” he muttered in a low tone. Hinawakan n’ya ang kamay ko at inilayo iyon sa damit n’ya.

“Then spank me, punish me with these large hands,” I whispered and ran my fingers on his hands.

Saglit siyang natahimik. Naglalabanan lang kami ng titig dalawa. I honestly don’t know where I took the courage to say or do these stuffs to him. Hindi ko ginagawa ang mga ganitong bagay sa mga naka-fling ko noon… but Xanthos is a different case.

I was stunned when he held my hand and pulled me closer to him. Ang mas lalong nagpagulat sa akin ay nang walang kahirap-hirap na pinatalikod n’ya ako saka ako pinadapa sa malapit na couch. My knees instantly weakened when his hands held my lower abdomen and lifted it up, my cheeks heated when I realized that my hips are elevated. Napakapit ako nang mahigpit sa sandalan ng couch. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang init ng katawan niya mula sa likuran ko.

Mas lalo akong kinakabahan dahil hindi ko nakikita ang reaksyon n’ya.

“W-what are you doing?” I asked in a nervous tone. Pakiramdam ko nawalan na ako ng kontrol sa larong ako ang nagsimula. I felt so weak beneath him.

Inilapit n’ya ang labi sa tainga ko. Pakiramdam ko may dumaloy na kuryente sa buong katawan ko nang dumampi ang malambot niyang labi sa tainga ko.

“You told me to spank you,” he mumbled. Tila nagkagulo ang sistema ko nang dumampi ang mainit niyang hininga sa tainga ko.

“X-Xanthos…”

Napatingin ako sa pinto, anumang oras pwedeng dumating si Mom. Hindi ba siya natatakot?

“Why? Scared? I thought you want to be punished, I’ll give it to you if that’s what you want… bad girl,” he whispered. His voice is so deep and sexy.

I gasped when his hand touched my lower back gently.

Damn, I didn’t know he’ll do this for real. I didn’t expect that he has courage to do this… to tease me like this.

“Kiara! Xanthos! Nagluto ako ng almusal!”

Tuluyan ng bumigay ang mga tuhod ko nang marinig ko ang boses ni Mom mula sa kusina. Agad na nahawakan ni Xanthos ang baywang ko upang hindi ako sumubsob sa couch.

“Do you want her to see us like this? Huh?” he asked in a deep husky voice.

“L-let me go,” I muttered weakly.

Nakahinga lang ako nang maluwag nang tuluyan na n’ya akong bitiwan. Agad na bumagsak ang nanghihinang katawan ko sa couch. My knees are still shaking, I can feel the sweat all over my body for some unknown reason.

Wala pa nga siyang gaanong ginawa pero ganito na ang epekto sa akin… Damn, Xanthos is really something.

Xanthos stood up and stared at me with blank expression.

“Stop bothering me if you don’t want me to punish you for real… If that happens, I won’t stop punishing you even if you beg me to stop.” He took his towel and wiped his nape while staring at me.

Hindi na ako nakapagsalita nang umalis na siya sa gym at iniwan akong nakatulala rito.

To be honest, his threat didn’t scare me at all… it just excites me and made my insides churned… I’m turned on.

Damn, I want him… I want him to do me, I want him to take me. I want him so much.

AS EXPECTED, Xanthos acted like he didn’t tease me at all.

“OMG, I knew it, Xanthos Archante is really a beast. Girl, just leave him to me.”

Tiningnan ko nang masama si Abi. Siya ang kausap ko ngayon dahil ayaw ko namang i-kwento kay Cad ang tungkol sa ginawa ni Xanthos kanina. Mas expert si Abi sa kalandian. Maybe she can give me an advice… Pakiramdam ko kasi ako ang matatalo sa aming dalawa ni Xanthos and of course I won’t let that happen. I have to be the dominant and seductress in the game I started.

“Xanthos is so hard to read, Abi. Hindi ko alam kung ano’ng tumatakbo sa isip n’ya. Does he find me attractive or he’s just want me get the fuck out of his life? Pinagti-trip-an niya lang ba ako o talagang naaakit siya sa ’kin? I don’t know, Abi. I can’t let him win this shit,” I said and gritted my teeth.

I drank the liquor that Cad served me awhile ago. By the way, where is he now? May iba na naman bang nilalandi ang lalaking ’yon?

“If he teased you like that, then he’s just playing hard to get, bitch. He really likes playing with you, you should grab the chance… But wait, are you willing to lose you v-card to him?” Abi asked and raised her eyebrow. Natigilan naman ako sa tanong n’ya.

Damn, why did I even tell her that I’m still a virgin? Wala pa namang preno ang bibig nitong si Abi kung magtanong.

“Sa akin na lang ’yon, masyado ka ng tsismosa ha,” pag-iwas ko na lang sa usapan at basta siya sinubuan ng fries.

“By the way, pansin ko pa-chill chill ka na lang nitong mga nakaraang araw ha. Hindi ko na workaholic ngayon?” tila natatawang tanong ni Abi. Napairap na lang ako.

“I’m on vacation leave. Babalik din ako sa work after two weeks kaya kailangan ko ng mapasuko ang Xanthos na ’yon hangga’t hindi pa ’ko busy.”

“Iyon naman pala, e. Bakit mo sinasayang ang oras mo rito sa bar?” Abi asked and chuckled.

Natigilan ako… oo nga ’no. Why am I wasting my precious time here?

Agad akong tumayo at kinuha ang sling bag ko. Natigilan ako nang makita si Cadence na papalapit sa amin. Nagtatakang nakatingin siya sa ’kin.

“Aalis ka na agad?” Cad asked and sat beside Abi.

“Oo, kailangan kong pagplanuhan nang maigi kung paano ko aakitin si Xanthos, I have a limited time only, you know,” sabi ko na lang saka pinagpag ang damit ko.

“Xanthos? Did I hear it right? Is that his surname or–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin ni Cadence.

“I don’t want to chit chat now, mamaya na lang tayo mag-usap. Call me if you want, bye!”

Bumeso ako kay Abi saka humalik sa pisngi ni Cadence bago umalis ng bar. Sumakay na agad ako sa kotse at pinaharurot ’yon. Buti na lang kaunti lang ang ininom ko, light drinks pa.

Nakauwi rin agad ako sa bahay, agad akong bumaba ng kotse at kinuha ang susi ng gate sa sling bag ko. Papalapit na sana ako sa gate nang madapa ako, naputol ang takong ng heels ko.

“Fuck,” I mumbled and removed my heels.

Napangiwi ako at agad na tiningnan ang tuhod ko. Nakahinga lang ako nang maluwag nang makitang wala naman ’yong sugat.

Akmang tatayo na ako nang maagaw ang atensyon ko ng ilaw galing sa kotse. That car is familiar, as far as I remember, that is Xanthos’ car.

Tama nga ang hinala ko, lumabas ng kotse si Xanthos. Mukhang kakagaling n’ya lang sa trabaho dahil naka three-piece suit pa siya.

Hinabol ko siya ng tingin. Saglit siyang tumingin sa ’kin na nakaupo pa rin sa sahig, ngunit nilagpasan n’ya rin ako at nagtungo na sa gate upang buksan ’yon. Napaawang na lang ang labi ko sa ginawa n’yang pag-dedma sa ’kin.

“Xanthos!” I shouted and threw my heels at him. He looked at me with creased forehead.

“What?” he asked as if he doesn’t give a fuck.

“What are you doing?! Help me get up! Nakita mo ng ganito ang hitsura ko, ’di ba?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ko.

“Can’t you just stand up?” tanong na n’ya. Naningkit ang mga mata ko.

“Hihingi ba ako ng tulong sa ’yo kung kaya ko namang tumayo?” Actually, kaya ko naman talagang tumayo.

“I don’t know, maybe this is just a part of your scheme,” he said and shrugged. I rolled my eyes in annoyance.

“To hell with that, if you don’t want to help me, fine. Pumasok ka na sa loob.” Napaismid na lang ako.

Natigilan ako nang tumango siya at pumasok na nga siya sa loob. Napangiwi na lang ako at hinilot ang paa ko. He’s far from being a gentleman, paano ba siya nagustuhan ni Mom?

Akmang tatayo na ako nang maramdaman kong may malakas na braso na bumuhat sa ’kin. Gulat na napatingin ako kay Xanthos at napakapit sa batok n’ya. Xanthos carried me, bridal style. Did he just carry me? Ano naman kaya ang nakain n’ya?

Hindi na lang nagsalita si Xanthos at binuhat ako hanggang sa loob, natahimik na lang ako dahil baka bigla na lang n’ya akong bitiwan kapag nang-inis ako.

Xanthos put me on the couch. I just cleared my throat and scratched my nape. Should I say thank you? Well, maybe that’s not a good idea, that will just make the atmosphere more awkward.

Akmang iiwan na ako ni Xanthos dito nang hawakan ko ang laylayan ng coat n’ya. Natigilan naman siya at napatingin sa ’kin. Inangat ko na lang ang kanang paa ko at ipinatong ’yon sa mini table.

“Massage my foot, it really hurts,” I said and slightly pouted.

Xanthos just sighed and sat on the mini table. He gently held my foot and put it on his lap. He starts massaging my foot gently. Napapangiwi na lang ako dahil talagang masakit ang paa ko.

Anyway, hindi ko inasahang susundin n’ya ang sinabi ko. Siguro naawa na siya sa kalagayan ng paa ko.

“It’s swelling,” Xanthos murmured.

“It’s nothing, yelo lang ang katapat n’yan,” sabi ko na lang at sumandal sa sandalan ng couch at tinitigan siya.

I guess Xanthos has a soft side too, huh.

Pinanood ko siya habang hinihilot ang paa ko. Obvious naman na wala siyang alam sa ginagawa n’ya, but I still enjoy it. His gentle touch contradicts his large and calloused hands. Pakiramdam ko nga ay kayang kaya n’yang baliin ang buto ko ro’n ng walang kahirap-hirap.

Masyado siyang focused sa paghilot sa paa ko kaya yata hindi na n’ya napapansin na nakatitig ako sa kanya. Kahit sino’ng nasa posisyon ko mapapatitig sa kanya nang matagal.

“Where’s Mom?”

“Work,” tipid na sagot n’ya.

Mukhang bumalik na ulit si Mom sa pagiging workaholic.

Napatitig na lang ako sa kanya ulit. Kung ano-anong ginagawa n’ya sa paa ko, pinipindot-pindot n’ya rin. Kung ire-rate ko ang hilot n’ya, malamang 2.5/10.

“Kung hindi ka lang kabit ni Mom, I’ll definitely date you,” I murmured while staring at him.

Natigilan naman si Xanthos sa ginagawa at napatingin sa ’kin. He just gave me a slight smirk and scratched his thick eyebrow.

“Kung hindi ako kabit ng Mom mo, I still won’t date you.”

Bumalik na siya sa paghilot sa paa ko. Napaismid na lang ako sa sinabi n’ya. Why is he so confident? Am I really not attractive in his eyes? Ano ba’ng mali sa akin? Or am I too provocative?

“So, you’re really into older women?” I asked and raised my eyebrow.

“Maybe I just don’t like immature and younger ones like you.”

Grabe talaga siya magsalita, masyadong direct to the point at wala man lang filter.

“I’m not immature and I’m already 24.” My forehead furrowed.

“It’s okay to be immature though. Stop acting like a mature woman, take it easy, and enjoy your pace. Life is short.”

Napatingin ako sa kanya. Seryoso ang mukha n’ya habang sinasabi ang mga ’yon ngunit hindi siya nakatingin sa ’kin kundi sa paa ko.

Natigilan ako nang tumingin siya sa ’kin. I blinked twice because of the intensity of his stare. Why is he looking at me like that?

Tumayo na siya at muling ipinatong ang paa ko sa mini table. Nanatili akong nakatingin sa bawat galaw n’ya. Nakapamulsang tumingin siya sa ’kin.

“Enjoy everything while life’s still not fucking you up. Stop wasting your time on me for it won’t benefit you.”

Pagkasabi no’n ay agad na n’ya akong iniwan dito sa living room. Napakunot na lang ang noo ko, na-gets ko naman ang sinabi n’ya… pero pakiramdam ko may mas malalim pang ibig sabihin ’yon.

---

“Sunggaban mo na lang siya basta pagkatapos magpahuli ka kay Tita Akira, tapos ang problema mo.”

Napailing na lang ako sa sinabi ni Cadence. As if naman gano’n lang kadali iyon.

“I won’t do that. Baliw ka ba?”

“Ano ba kasi talagang plano mo, sis? Gusto mo ma-fall sa ’yo ’yung soon to be step-dad mo para makipaghiwalay siya kay Tita Akira?” tanong ni Cad.

“Yeah, that’s right. I will make him fall for me just like in the movies,” I said with a smirk plastered on my lips.

“I think it will be the other way around,” natatawang sabi na lang ni Cad. Napairap naman ako.

“Hindi ako gano’ng karupok, Cad. Besides, nothing’s special about him aside from being sinfully handsome. I’ve already flirted with handsome guys like him before.” But

Xanthos is exceptionally handsome though

Napailing na lang ako, what the hell am I thinking?

“By the way, bye na. Mag-aalmusal muna ’ko, baka hindi ako pumunta sa bar tonight. Not sure. Bye!” Hindi ko na siya hinintay na sumagot at basta na lang binaba ang tawag.

Tumingin muna ako sa salamin bago lumabas ng kwarto. Pambahay lang ang suot ko, cotton shorts and t-shirt.

Dumiretso agad ako sa dining room. May nakahandang pagkain do’n pero walang tao. Sumilip ako sa living room para tingnan kung nandoon sila. Natigilan ako nang makita si Mom at Xanthos doon… bakit may dalang maleta si Mom?

Agad akong lumapit sa kanila, napatingin naman sila sa ’kin. Mom gave me a smile and pulled me into a tight hug. I just blinked and hugged her back. What the hell is happening?

Kumalas na si Mom sa pagkakayakap sa ’kin saka tumingin kay Xanthos. She gave him a peck on his lips, agad naman akong napaiwas ng tingin. They just kissed in front of me, great.

“Kiara, anak. I’ll be on a business trip for a week or two. Is it okay? You can stay with your Dad if you’re–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“It’s fine!”

Nagtatakang napatingin sila sa ’kin ni Xanthos. I just cleared my throat and scratched my nape. Damn, I just made it so obvious.

“I mean, it’s fine. I’ll still stay here. I want to know my future step-dad more,” I said and smiled sweetly at her.

Damn, this will be the perfect opportunity, I shouldn’t waste this one.

“By the way, where will you be staying, Mom?” I asked and held her hand.

“Sa Vietnam, may ipapatayong ilang branch do’n.”

Napatango na lang ako sa sinabi n’ya.

“Should I just come with you?” Xanthos asked. My eyebrow instantly shot up. Damn this man.

“You don’t have to, I’ll be fine. Sanay na naman ako sa business trips. Just take care of my daughter, hmm?”

“Let me take you to the airport,” sabi pa ni Xanthos. Napailing na lang si Mom habang natatawa.

“I’m fine, seriously. May trabaho ka pa. Kaya ko naman mag-isa.”

Tumango na lang si Xanthos kahit halatang napipilitan.

“By the way, I have to go. Male-late ako sa flight, bye! Don’t skip meals.” Pagkasabi no’n, binitbit na ni Mom ang maleta n’ya at agad na lumabas ng bahay.

Naglakad kami ni Xanthos hanggang pinto at sinilip si Mom hanggang sa makasakay siya sa kotse at makaalis ’yon.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos nang kami na lang dalawa. Hinahabol pa rin n’ya ng tingin ang kotse ni Mom. An evil grin plastered on my face. He was taken aback when I suddenly hugged his arm.

“What are you doing?” He tried to push me but I just hugged him tighter.

“Mom said you should take care of me,” I said and smiled sweetly at him. Napakunot naman ang noo n’ya.

Idinikit niya ang dulo ng hintuturo sa noo ko at itinulak ako palayo. Napaismid na lang ako at sinimangutan siya.

“You’re not a Daddy material,” I said while shaking my head.

Muli akong lumapit sa kanya at humawak sa braso n’ya. Napakunot naman ang noo n’ya.

“By the way, tayo lang dalawa sa bahay na ’to for a week… it will surely be chaotic, right?” I asked and gave him a sweet smile. Xanthos sighed and faced me.

Natigilan ako nang humakbang siya papalapit sa ’kin, ako naman ang napaatras dahil sa intensidad ng tingin n’ya. Damn, this man is moody as fuck.

“Yeah, it will be chaotic… and it will surely not gonna to be easy for me, it will give me hard time.”

A smirk plastered on my face. He just emphasized the word hard. What does he mean by that?

“So, you find me seductive?” I asked and ran my fingers on his chest.

“No, I find you troublesome…” He gave me a sexy smirk. “…and I won’t find you seductive for you’re far from being one.”

Pagkasabi no’n, agad na rin n’ya akong tinalikuran at bumalik na sa loob. Napaawang na lang ang labi ko sa sinabi n’ya.

Did he just… insult me?

Chapter Five

“You insisted on seducing him pero tanong ka rin naman nang tanong sa ’kin. Sana ako na lang ang nang-akit sa kanya, ’di ba?”

Napairap na lang ako sa sinabi ni Abi. Ang kapal talaga ng mukha n’ya.

“I just need advice, okay? I can handle him,” I muttered while gritting my teeth.

“Oh sure you can,” she said in a mocking tone.

“Whatever, just give me some advice. I’m a natural seductress, but Xanthos isn’t an easy opponent.” I sighed and bit my nail unconsciously.

“Kiara, sa tingin ko si Xanthos ’yung tipo ng tao na mas gusto ang pakipot-type. Iwasan mo kaya siya, try mo.”

Napangiwi ako sa sinabi n’ya.

“Mas pabor sa kanya kapag ginawa ko ’yon,” sabi ko na lang at napailing. That’s not a good idea.

“Kulitin mo na lang nang kulitin, ano pa ba’ng ibang option mo? Galingan mo na lang. Sa tingin ko naman bibigay rin siya kapag nakulitan sa ’yo.”

I sighed and put my hair into a messy bun. I don’t know what trick will work for him anymore. Is he allergic to me or what?

“Dapat ba sunggaban ko na siya?” tila pabulong na tanong ko. Narinig kong napahagalpak ng tawa si Abi sa kabilang linya.

“Woooh! That’s mah friend,” she said while laughing. I just rolled my eyes and gritted my teeth.

“Whatever, bye na.” Hindi ko na siya hinintay na sumagot at basta na lang binaba ang tawag.

I looked at myself in the mirror and took a deep breath. I stayed up late last night just to think of ways on how to make Xanthos surrender to his desires. I know he wants me too… he’s just denying it. Yeah, I’m sure.

Instead of putting my hair into a messy bun, I just let it down. I want to show Xanthos that we both have curly hair. Well, my hair isn’t curly like his, but it’s wavy, we’re still kind of meant to be.

What the hell am I thinking?

Napailing na lang ako at inayos ang buhok ko. I’m just wearing a simple large t-shirt and shorts but I still look fine.

Lumabas na agad ako ng silid ko at dumiretso sa kusina, pa-ika ika pa ako maglakad dahil masakit pa rin ang paa ko.

Natigilan ako nang maabutan ko ro’n si Xanthos na nagluluto. He’s just wearing a white t-shirt and pants kaya kitang kita ang tattoos n’ya sa magkabilang braso n’ya, he’s also wearing my Mom’s pink apron. It looks cute although it contradicts his manly physique.

I sat on the table and stared at his back. I’m dying to hug him from behind. Mukhang bagong ligo lang siya, I bet he smells incredibly good right now.

“What do you want to eat?”

Napapitlag ako nang magtanong siya. Dahan-dahan na nga ang kilos ko para hindi n’ya ko marinig, e. Mukhang malakas ang pakiramdam ng isang ’to.

“You’re not a food but it’s you I wanna eat,” I said and smiled sweetly.

Hindi man lang nag-react si Xanthos sa sinabi ko at tinuloy lang ang pagluluto. My lips twitched in irritation.

Xanthos sighed and faced me. As usual, there’s no emotion evident on his handsome face.

“You can’t eat me, I’m too much for you to handle,” he said and gave me a small smile.

Damn, my heart almost fell with that small smile of his. Maybe he’s really too much for me to handle. Even his simple movements can melt my insides. How can he be so effortlessly charming?

Damn, now I can’t blame my Mom, she’s clearly bewitched by this man. But that won’t happen to me, I shouldn’t let that happen to me. I will always be the master of this game.

I just cleared my throat and avoided his cold gaze.

“What did you cook by the way?” I asked, pulling myself off from his charm.

“Eggs and bacon,” he answered and put the plate on the table, beside me. My mouth agape when I saw his dish.

What the fuck? Bakit parang hilaw ang bacon? ’Yung itlog hindi rin naluto nang ayos.

“There’s no way I’ll eat this crap,” I said with gritting teeth and pushed the plate away from me.

“Then cook for us, I honestly don’t know how to cook,” walang kaabog-abog na sabi ni Xanthos na tila ba hindi man lang siya nahiya sa ’kin.

“I can’t touch those utensils, Xanthos… Believe me, I’ll just end up burning this whole place,” I said and laughed awkwardly at him.

It’s true. I always spend my time at work and partying, of course, because I rarely have time for that. Hindi ko na pinagkaabalahan pa ang aralin na magluto for I don’t think it’s necessary.

“This won’t do, let’s just order pizza,” I suggest and smiled at him.

Xanthos sighed and nodded. Natawa ako nang mapakamot siya sa batok n’ya. Kung magiging mag-asawa siguro kami, puro order na pagkain lang ang kakainin namin since wala sa amin ang marunong magluto.

Agad kong binuksan ang phone ko para um-order ng two boxes ng pizza. Minsan lang naman ako kumain ng mga ganito kaya okay lang. Mamayang gabi nga yayayain ko si Xanthos bumili ng beer at buffalo wings, para naman magkaroon kami ng moment.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos nang umupo siya sa upuan na malapit sa ’kin. Napatingin ako sa tattoos n’ya sa arms n’ya… damn, I’ll admire those forever.

Umangat naman ang tingin ko sa buhok n’ya. I gently touched his soft curly hair. Napapitlag naman siya sa ginawa ko at napakunot ang noo. Napangisi na lang ako sa reaksyon n’ya.

“Your hair makes you look like a Greek God from Mount Olympus,” I muttered and twirl his hair around my finger. Madaling iikot ang buhok n’ya sa daliri ko dahil may kahabaan nang kaunti ang buhok n’ya.

Napapitlag ako nang hawakan n’ya ang kamay ko at pabalyang inilayo ang kamay ko sa buhok n’ya.

Ang arte.

He just took his phone from his pocket and typed something there. Pasimpleng sumilip ako nang kaunti sa phone n’ya. He’s texting his secretary.

“What are you gonna do after we eat?” I asked and touched his hair again.

“Magtatrabaho, ano pa ba?” sarkastikong sabi n’ya. Napaismid na lang ako.

“Look at my foot.” Itinaas ko ang paa ko na namamaga at ipinakita sa kanya. Napatingin naman siya ro’n. “Ganito na nga ang paa ko tapos iiwan mo pa ’ko. Paano kung may manloob dito ha?”

Xanthos scratched his eyebrow and tilted his head.

“You’ll be guarded by my bodyguards,” he said then typed something in his phone again.

“I won’t entrust my life to your bodyguards!” I exclaimed. Xanthos put his phone in his pocket and faced me.

“But you entrust your life to me? That’s worse, Kiara,” he said while staring at me. Nakakatunaw ng pagkatao ang titig n’yang ’yan.

“It’s fine, only you can ruin my life,” I said and smiled sweetly at him. I touched his chin and gently pinched it… so handsome.

Inalis n’ya agad ang kamay ko.

“I don’t have time to babysit you, Kiara,” masungit na sabi n’ya.

“So sungit,” I muttered and rolled my eyes.

Ilang minuto pa ang nakalipas, dumating na ang order naming pizza. Si Xanthos na ang kumuha at nagbayad since hindi ako nakakalakad nang ayos.

He put the boxes of pizza on the table and sat on the chair. Nanatili akong nakaupo sa table while swaying my feet. Xanthos opened the box of pizza. I gasped in excitement. I missed eating pizza.

Natigilan ako nang mapansin kong inaalis ni Xanthos ang pineapples sa pizza. I chuckled and took the pineapple from him and put it on my pizza.

“You don’t like pineapple on pizza? Why? That’s what social media tells you?” I asked and raised my eyebrow. Xanthos’ forehead furrowed.

“I don’t even use social media. I just don’t like pineapples,” he said and started eating his pizza. Ang cute n’ya kumain ng pizza.

“Sana pizza na lang ako,” I mumbled and pointed the pizza he’s eating right now.

Napakunot ang noo ni Xanthos.

“Para ako ang kinakain mo.” I giggled. Mas lalo namang napakunot ang noo ni Xanthos.

“We’re wishing the same thing, I wish you’re a pizza like this. I just have to eat you and you’re gone,” he said and continued eating his pizza again. Napaawang na lang ang labi ko habang nakatitig sa kanya.

Damn this man.

INIWAN PA rin ako ni Xanthos at pumasok sa trabaho kahit masakit ang paa ko. He’s a heartless jerk. I almost though he has a soft side in him but he just… whatever, damn him!

“Kaya nga ako nagpunta rito kasi akala ko makikita ko ang future step-dad mo. Tapos nasa trabaho pala?” reklamo ni Cadence habang hinihilot ang paa ko. Napataas ang kilay ko sa sinabi n’ya.

“Lumilihis ka na ba ng landas, Cadence?” I asked and drank my orange juice.

Kung mababago man ang sexuality ni Cad, that’s completely fine, there’s nothing wrong with it naman. He’s still my friend, but I guess if that’s the case, I won’t kiss him anymore… baka magalit pa siya sa ’kin.

“Ouch!” napahiyaw ako nang itulak n’ya ang paa ko na nasa kandungan n’ya.

“Issue ka masyado, e. Curious lang kasi ako, okay? Titingnan ko lang kung sinong mas guwapo sa ’ming dalawa.”

“Bakit kailangan mo pang tingnan?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ko.

“Siyempre, kapag mas guwapo ako, sige landiin mo lang siya… pero kapag mas guwapo siya, ako ang lalandi sa kanya,” nakangising sabi n’ya saka nagtaas-baba ng kilay.

I kicked his leg and punched his muscled arm. Napangiwi naman siya sa ginawa ko.

“Tangina, ang sakit ha! Banned ka na sa bar ko from now on, ekis ka na, girl.”

Napailing na lang ako sa mga nonsense na sinasabi ni Cadence. Kung hindi lang talaga busy si Abi, si Abi na lang ang yayayain ko rito, e.

Natigilan ako nang may maalala ako.

“Cadence, ano’ng pwedeng pag-usapan kapag late night talks?” tanong ko. Nagtatakang napatingin naman sa ’kin si Cadence. His forehead is furrowed as if I asked him something ridiculous.

“Ano pa ba? E ’di landian. Pwede naman mag-kwentuhan about life para kunwari deep… pwede rin dirty talks saka sex–aray! Tangina naman, Kiarabog, seryoso akong nag-a-advise dito, e.” reklamo ni Cad nang batukan ko siya.

Cadence can’t be serious even for a minute, but I guess that’s what makes him more charming.

“Be serious!” I said and glared at him.

“Sus, kunwari pa ’to. Maharot ka naman kaya okay lang ’yan,” natatawang sabi n’ya at tinapik-tapik pa ang braso ko. Tinulak ko na lang siya palayo sa ’kin.

Kwentuhan about life? Pwede rin ang isang ’yon. I’ll get to know him more. Pero ang problema ko, hindi naman ako sanay mag-bring up ng gano’ng topic.

“Pst, Kiara.”

I turned my gaze at Cadence. He looks serious this time. He sighed, held my hand, and gently squeezed it. He gave me a small smile and intertwined our fingers.

“Don’t always let your emotions win over your mind. Isipin mo rin ang lahat ng consequences ng gagawin mo. The last thing I want is seeing you in pain. Loko-loko lang ako, but you know how much I care for you, right?” He gently caressed my cheek.

There are times that Cadence is like this. Magsisinungaling ako kung sasabihin kong hindi ako naaapektuhan o wala lang sa ’kin ang mga sinabi n’ya. I’m aware that he cherishes and cares for me so much and I’m so thankful to have him as my friend.

“If that future step-dad of yours hurt you in any ways possible, I won’t step back and stay still, Kiara,” he mumbled while staring at me.

Ito ang mga pagkakataon na nakakatakot si Cadence. I know he’s more than just a happy-go-lucky billionaire, I know there’s still something more to know about him, but I’ll still choose to trust him. He’s my friend.

“Hindi bagay sa ’yo magseryoso,” natatawang sabi ko at hinawakan ang kamay n’ya na nakahawak sa pisngi ko.

“Parang gago naman ’to, feel na feel ko na, e. Feeling ko mas guwapo ako ng ten times sa gano’n tapos panira ka. Ang pangit mo ka-bonding,” napapailing na sabi n’ya saka binatukan ako.

Walang hiya talaga ’to!

Natigilan kami nang tumunog ang phone ni Cad, pasimple akong sumilip. May nag-text sa kanya na Zakarius ang pangalan.

“Shit, badtrip talaga. Aalis na ’ko, Kiara. Gusto ko pa sanang makita future step-dad mo kaso urgent ’to. Bukas na lang ulit, bye.”

Napakurap na lang ako nang basta siya tumayo at umalis. Mukhang seryoso nga ang kailangan n’yang puntahan dahil nakalimutan n’yang humalik sa ’kin na never nangyari.

I just ordered buffalo wings and canned beers pagkaalis ni Cadence. Medyo okay na ang paa ko, pero hindi pa rin ako makalakad nang ayos. Maybe I should refrain myself from always wearing high heels which is a real torture. I feel so confident whenever I wear high heels.

Agad akong napatayo nang bumukas ang pinto. Napangiti ako nang makitang si Xanthos ’yon. Pa-ika ikang naglakad ako papalapit sa kanya. Napakunot naman ang noo n’ya habang nakatingin sa ’kin.

“One of the guards told me that a man around your age came here,” he said and removed his coat.

Man around my age? Mukha bang ka-edad ko lang si Cadence? Mas matanda nga ng eight years sa akin ang lalaking ’yon, e.

“Ah, I invited my friend here,” I said and smiled at him.

“Sino?” tanong n’ya saka tumingin sa ’kin.

Damn… it’s just ‘sino?’ but my heart almost literally came out of its ribcage.

“Why do you want to know?” I asked in a teasing voice and smiled sweetly at him.

“Don’t tell me if you don’t want to.”

Nilagpasan na n’ya ako pagkasabi no’n. Napaismid na lang ako nang agad siyang dumiretso sa silid n’ya at sinara ang pinto… He’s so boring.

Nagtungo na lang ako sa kusina at kinuha sa ref ang isang plastic ng canned beer. Ininit ko rin ang buf wings na in-order ko. After that, bumalik ulit ako sa living room at nilagay sa mini table ang beer at buffalo wings.

Bakit hindi pa nalabas si Xanthos?

Makalipas ang ilan pang minuto, lumabas na si Xanthos. He’s just wearing a huge plain t-shirt and cute blue-striped pajamas. Mukhang kaka-shower n’ya lang.

“Have you eaten already?” tanong ni Xanthos habang pinupunasan ang basa n’yang buhok gamit ang towel saka umupo sa tabi ko. Hindi naman sobrang lapit, mga ilang pulgada rin ang layo n’ya.

“Yup, may friend brought me something to eat. How about you? Kumain ka na?” tanong ko.

Tumango na lang siya. Natigilan siya nang mapatingin sa beer at buffalo wings na nasa mini table. Agad na napakunot ang noo n’ya.

“By the way, mag-bonding tayong dalawa.” I took one canned beer and opened it then gave it to him. Tinanggap naman n’ya ’yon kahit halatang nag-aalangan.

“I don’t have time for this,” he said and put the beer on the table again. My forehead furrowed.

“Sige na. Hindi naman kita lalasingin tapos pipikutin ’no,” naiinis na sabi ko at muling ibinigay sa kanya ang beer.

Kumuha rin ako ng sa akin at binuksan ’yon.

“Cheers!” sabi ko saka pinagdikit ang canned beers na hawak namin. Napakamot na lang si Xanthos sa kilay n’ya saka tumango.

Pagkainom ko ng beer, inilapag ko ’yon sa mini table saka kumuha ng buffalo wings at kinain ’yon. Pasimple akong tumingin sa kanya at napangiti nang makitang ininom n’ya ang beer.

“Xanthos, look at me.”

Natigilan naman siya at tumingin sa ’kin.

“Do you honestly don’t find me attractive?” I asked and took another bite on buffalo wing. Xanthos’ forehead creased.

“You’re beautiful… but you’re not my type,” sabi n’ya saka muling uminom ng beer. Napaismid na lang ako.

“May kapatid ka ba?” tanong ko ulit. Tumango naman siya.

“I have a younger brother.”

Napasinghap ako sa sinabi n’ya. I suddenly want to see his brother. Magkamukha kaya sila ni Xanthos?

“Where’s your parents?” I asked again out of curiousity.

Natigilan siya sa pag-inom dahil sa tanong ko.

“They’re gone,” tipid na sagot na lang n’ya saka muling ininom ang beer. Napatikhim na lang ako at napakamot sa batok ko.

“S-sorry, I was insensitive,” I mumbled and scratched my nape.

“It’s fine,” sabi na lang n’ya saka sumandal sa sandalan ng couch. Pasimple akong tumingin sa kanya. Mukha namang hindi siya na-offend, pero nakakahiya pa rin. I’m so insensitive.

Nawalan tuloy ako ng gana na landiin siya.

“Xanthos,” pagtawag ko sa kanya. Napatingin naman siya sa ’kin.

“Hmm?” he asked and opened another canned beer.

“Ano’ng iniisip mo tungkol sa ’kin?” tanong ko.

Xanthos gave me a sexy smirk and shook his head. Muli siyang uminom ng beer bago sinagot ang tanong ko.

“There will be no thrill at all if I tell you that, right?” he asked. I just rolled my eyes at him.

“Whatever,” bulong ko na lang saka inilapag ang canned beer na iniinom ko sa mini table.

Natigilan ako nang tumayo na si Xanthos. Akmang aalis na siya nang hawakan ko ang kamay n’ya. Muli ko siyang hinila paupo sa tabi ko.

I sat on his lap and hugged his nape. Halatang nagulat siya sa ginawa ko at napatingin sa mukha ko. I just gave him a sweet smile and touched his curly hair.

“Diba magbo-bonding tayo? Bakit aalis ka kaaga–” Hindi na natuloy ang sasabihin ko nang walang kahirap-hirap na naihiga ako ni Xanthos sa couch. Napasinghap ako nang pumaibabaw siya sa ’kin.

Xanthos stare at my eyes with no emotion in his. He gently caressed my cheek down to my jaw then to my chin. I can’t read what he’s thinking right now. Halos magwala ang puso ko dahil sa kakaibang emosyon na hindi ko maipaliwanag.

Bakit ako kinakabahan? Diba ito ang gusto kong mangyari? Dapat handa na ako sa ganito… I’m not a freakin’ newbie.

Halos matunaw ako sa intensidad ng titig n’ya. Tila may kuryente ring dumadaloy sa katawan ko dahil sa kamay n’ya na hinahaplos ang pisngi ko. I felt so weak and helpless beneath his large frame, beneath his touch, beneath his intense stare.

“I think should commend you for having the courage to seduce a veteran like me… but you’re still an amateur, Kiara. You are no match for me.”

Tumatama ang mainit n’yang hininga sa labi ko na lalong nagpahina sa sistema ko.

“I know what’s running in this pretty head of yours, Kiara. You must be thinking that you’ll be able to control me, you must be thinking that you can seduce me and play with my heart so I’ll end up leaving your Mom. You’re confident that I’ll be at your mercy.” Inilapit n’ya ang labi sa tainga ko saka bumulong do’n. “I think it will be the other way around, Kiara.”

My whole body shivered because of his hot breath on my ear. Agad na nagtayuan ang mga balahibo ko kasabay ng panghihina ng mga tuhod ko.

Nakahinga lang ako nang maluwag nang tumayo na siya at iniwan akong nakahiga sa couch, tulala pa rin at hindi makagalaw.

I don’t know but his words kinda frighten me. The fact that he knows what I’m thinking scares me.

It seems like I underestimated Xanthos Archante; he’s not an ordinary man… and definitely not an easy prey.

Chapter Six

I won’t give up. Hindi ako magpapasindak sa mga sinabi ni Xanthos last night. I’ll make sure to make him surrender; he’ll be at my mercy. That’s for sure.

“Smells good,” I muttered while inhaling the scent of brewed coffee.

Natigilan ako nang makitang lumabas na si Xanthos ng silid n’ya. He’s now wearing his typical work attire, three piece suit. I unconsciously bit my lower lip while staring at him. He’s sinfully handsome face and manly physique is too much to handle for this morning. Ang aga aga kung ano-ano’ng tumatakbo sa isip ko ngayon kahit pa kumpleto naman ang damit na suot n’ya.

Nakaayos ang buhok n’ya at hindi nakabagsak, he looks neat and professional that way but I like his disheveled hairstyle more. Sa bahay lang n’ya yata hinahayaang nakabagsak ang buhok n’ya.

“I hope you’re aware that you’re shamelessly showing your admiration to me right now.”

That woke me up from my reveries. I cleared my throat and drank my coffee. Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya saka hinawi ang buhok ko.

“Do you want coffee?” I asked and smiled at him. “or do you want me?”

Hindi pinansin ni Xanthos ang tanong ko at kumuha ng tubig sa ref saka uminom. Napaismid na lang ako at umupo sa mesa.

“Are you going out?” Xanthos asked and glanced at me. Saglit n’yang hinagod ng tingin ang kabuuan ko.

Oh right, I’m wearing a peach skater dress and flat sandals. Hindi ako makapagsuot ng heels dahil medyo masakit pa ang paa ko.

“Yeah, I need to buy some necessities.” Lumapit ako sa kanya at humawak sa necktie n’ya. “Will you accompany me?” I asked and gave him my sweetest smile.

Xanthos just slightly pushed me. Napaismid na lang ako at inirapan siya. Allergic ba siya sa ’kin? Para namang may nakakahawa akong sakit.

“I’m busy and even if I’m not, I still won’t accompany you. I don’t like wasting time over small things,” he said and fixed his necktie.

He really doesn’t filter his words. Sasabihin n’ya ang gusto n’yang sabihin. Hindi pwede ang sensitive sa taong ’to.

Akmang aalis na siya ngunit agad kong nahawakan ang braso n’ya. Hinila ko siya paupo sa isang upuan saka umupo sa kandungan n’ya. Halatang natigilan siya sa ginawa ko.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asked and was about to push me but I encircled my arms around his nape.

“Wait lang kasi.” I cleared my throat and unbuttoned his coat and waistcoat. He tried to stop me but I immediately slapped his hand. Sunod kong inalis ay ang necktie n’ya.

“Are you out of your mind?” mariin tanong pa ni Xanthos.

Muli kong sinuot sa kanya ang necktie, halatang natigilan siya at nagtatakang napatingin sa ginagawa ko. I somewhat felt satisfied when I saw him showed his emotions. Minsan lang siya mag-react ng ganyan kaya talagang satisfying. Mukhang litong lito talaga siya sa ginagawa ko at nakakunot pa nang maigi ang noo n’ya.

“From now on, ako na ang magsusuot ng necktie sa ’yo, okay?” I asked and smiled sweetly at him again. Muli kong binalik sa pagkakabutones ang waistcoat n’ya.

Umalis na ako sa kandungan n’ya. Xanthos cleared his throat and stood up too. He fixed his coat and turned his back on me. Hindi na ito nagsalita pa at basta na lang umalis ng kusina. Agad ko namang kinuha ang handbag ko sa mesa at hinabol siya.

“Xanthos, wait!” I shouted but he continued walking as if he didn’t hear me.

Hanggang sa makalabas na ng bahay ay hindi n’ya ako nililingon. Agad kong hinawakan ang braso n’ya at pinaharap siya sa ’kin.

“Ihatid mo ako sa mall. I can’t drive,” I murmured and bit my lower lip. Xanthos sighed; he didn’t say anything. Pumasok na siya sa kotse n’ya. Napangiti na lang ako at pumasok na lang din sa kotse n’ya. Sa shotgun seat ako umupo, katabi n’ya.

Natigilan ako nang makitang nag-text si Abi.

Abilene: Where the hell are you, bitch?! Kanina pa kami naghihintay ni Cadence dito!

I just put my phone inside my bag. I don’t want any disturbance while I’m with Xanthos. Napatingin ako kay Xanthos na seryosong nagd-drive sa tabi ko. Napangiti na lang ako at sinundot ang braso n’ya… Hard.

“What?” tila iritadong tanong n’ya.

“You look hot while driving,” I mumbled and smiled like a crazy woman.

Hindi na lang siya nagsalita. Napaismid na lang ako at napatingin sa buhok n’ya. I missed his disheveled curly hair. Hindi na ako makapaghintay na umuwi siya galing sa trabaho.

“Mom texted me last night, her business trip might last for two weeks… Destiny is on our side, isn’t it?” I giggled.

Xanthos remained silent. Napaismid na lang ako at tumitig sa kanya. Simula ng ayusin ko ang necktie n’ya, hindi na siya nagsasalita. Ano ba’ng problema n’ya?

Tinigil na n’ya ang kotse nang nasa tapat na ng mall. Napairap na lang ako at isinabit ang handbag sa bisig ko. Feeling ko gusto na n’ya akong sipain palabas ng kotse n’ya.

“Hmm, Xanthos, do you want to–” he immediately cut me off.

“No. Get out.”

“Psh!” Napaismid ako saka agad na lumabas ng kotse n’ya. “Magpapakasaya ako at hindi uuwi! I’ll screw up with any men I want. You’re so boring, ang sungit pa,” naiinis na sabi ko saka padabog na isinara ang pinto ng kotse n’ya.

The only good thing about him is that he’s overly handsome… bukod do’n, wala na.

“Wow, ikaw pa talaga ang nakasimangot, e kami na nga ang pinaghintay mo rito nang matagal,” nakapamaywang na bungad sa akin ni Abi pagdating ko sa coffee shop na hintayan namin.

“Don’t start with me,” I mumbled and clenched my teeth.

“Ay, mukhang failed na naman pang-aakit n’ya sa future step-dad n’ya kuno,” natatawang sabi ni Cadence. Napahagalpak naman ng tawa si Abi at nakipag-apir pa kay Cad.

“That man is really something. He got my respect,” natatawang sabi ni Abi.

I glared at them. Napahawak silang pareho sa labi nila at tumahimik na. They’re making fun of my struggle, ang sasama ng ugali.

“Oh siya, let’s go shopping!” Abi exclaimed and raised her hands.

“Teka, bakit kailangan kasama palagi ako sa ganito?” tanong ni Cadence nang hilahin na kami ni Abi palabas ng coffee shop.

“Okay lang ’yan, let’s go!”

Nagsimula na kaming mamili ng kung ano-ano. Todo reklamo si Cadence pero panay naman ang lagay ng items sa cart n’ya. Ililibre daw kasi siya ni Abi kaya pumayag na siya… kapag libre talaga, ginaganahan palagi si Cadence.

“Wait, Kiara, is that your future step-dad kuno?”

Agad akong napalingon sa tinuro ni Abi. I gasped in disbelief when I saw Xanthos inside a jewelry store. What is he doing there? Balak n’ya bang regaluhan si Mom no’n? Ang corny.

“Saan?!” tanong ni Cad saka napatingin sa tinitingnan namin ni Abi.

Cad’s eyes narrowed while staring at Xanthos’ back. Nakatalikod na kasi si Xanthos sa pwesto namin.

“Medyo pamilyar ’yung likod n’ya. Tawagin mo nga, Kiara, para makita ko ’yung mukha,” sabi ni Cad at tinapik pa ang balikat ko.

“Abi, bayaran mo muna ang mga ’to for me. Magkita na lang tayo sa same coffee shop later, okay? Bye!”

Hindi ko na sila hinintay sumagot at agad silang iniwan doon. Agad kong pinuntahan si Xanthos sa jewelry shop, naabutan ko siya na nagtitingin pa ng mga kwintas.

“Xanthos,” I mumbled and tapped his back. Agad naman siyang napalingon sa ’kin.

“What are you doing here?” he asked as his forehead creased. I just shook my head and smiled at him.

“I should be the one to ask you that. I thought you’re busy, why are you here?” I asked and clung my arms around his hard one.

Hindi na siya nag-abala na itulak ako at tumingin na lang sa mga kwintas. Mukhang reregaluhan n’ya nga talaga si Mom.

“I think I’m not obligated to answer your questions,” tipid na sabi n’ya at lumabas na lang ng jewelry shop habang nakayakap pa rin ako sa braso n’ya.

“Are you planning to give my Mom a gift? You can ask me, I know what she likes… ahm, kinda.” Mas close nga pala ako kay Dad, hindi kami masyadong magka-vibe ni Mom.

“I think I know what she likes more than you do,” Xanthos muttered. I just rolled my eyes at him.

“How about you? I’ll give you a gift. Sabihin mo lang kung ano’ng gusto mo, ibibigay ko. Basta kiss ang kapalit,” nakangiting sabi ko saka hinigpitan ang yakap sa braso n’ya.

“Hmm, really?” he asked and looked at me.

I was kinda taken aback when our eyes suddenly met. Ang ganda talaga ng mga mata n’ya. His long eyelashes contrast the manly features of his face which I found cute. I can stare at his eyes like this for hours, I won’t complain.

I just cleared my throat and avoided his gaze when my heart starts beating faster. I gulped and tried to calm my heart and myself. I took a deep breath and looked at him again.

Is he bewitching me?

“Ahm, yeah. I’ll buy anything you want.” I smiled at him.

Xanthos sighed and held his chin. Nilibot n’ya ang tingin sa paligid.

“If you want my kiss, buy this whole mall and give it to me,” he said and looked at me. Napakurap naman ako sa sinabi n’ya.

“You want this whole mall?! My goodness, sa ginto ba gawa ang labi mo ha?!” naiinis na tanong ko at tinulak siya.

“I don’t settle for less, Kiara,” he said and gave me an evil smirk. Napaawang na lang ang labi ko nang maglakad na siya at iniwan ako ro’n.

---

“Wow, Xanthos is really a faithful man. Rare na ang mga katulad n’ya sa panahon ngayon,” sabi ni Abi sa kabilang linya.

Napairap na lang ako at umupo sa kama.

“What the hell is his problem, Abi? No man can resist someone like me. Well, I know my Mom is beautiful but still… how can be resist me? Hindi na ba ako maganda?” Napahawak ako sa pisngi ko.

“Of course you’re beautiful. Baka sadyang hindi ka lang talaga n’ya type. May mga gano’n naman kasi, girl. If I were you, sumuko ka na lang. Hayaan mo na ang Mom mo, mukhang hindi na rin naman sila magkakabalikan ng Dad mo, e.”

Natapos na kaming mag-usap ni Abi pero bumabagabaag pa rin sa isip ko ang mga sinabi n’ya. Am I just really wasting my time here? Wala na ba talagang pag-asa na magkabalikan ang parents ko?

Hindi ko na maalala kung gaano katagal akong nakatulala habang nag-iisip. Ngayon ko lang yata ginamit ang utak ko sa pag-iisip ng mababaw na bagay.

Tumayo ako at huminga nang malalim. Lumabas ako ng kuwarto at agad na dumiretso sa living room. Natigilan ako nang maabutan ko si Xanthos doon.

Wait, bakit may dala siyang maleta?

“Xanthos!”

Agad akong lumapit sa kanya. Natigilan siya at napatingin sa ’kin.

“What are you doing? Are you going somewhere?” I asked with a hint confusion. I don’t know why he’s doing this. Sobra na ba siyang naiirita sa ’kin?

“I’ll follow your Mom in Vietnam,” tipid na sagot n’ya. Agad na napakunot ang noo ko.

“Mom clearly said that you don’t have to do that. My goodness, Xanthos. Kaya na ni Mom ang sarili n’ya. Wala ka bang trabaho rito?!” nakapamaywang na tanong ko.

Ito na lang ang pagkakataon na meron ako tapos aalis pa siya?

Xanthos sighed and stared at me.

“I’m not obligated to answer your question.”

Here we go again with his favorite line.

“Just tell me, please. I’ll let you go if you have an acceptable reason,” I said and crossed my arms over my chest.

“I want to be with your Mom, I miss her so much. It’s an acceptable reason, right?” he asked and put his hand inside the pocket of his jeans.

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. I avoided his gaze and bit my lower lip. Hindi ko alam kung bakit nakaramdam ako nang kaunting sakit sa dibdib ko dahil sa sinabi n’ya. Masyado ba akong na-carried away sa pang-aakit ko sa kanya kaya nakakaramdam ako ng ganito?

Hindi ako nakagalaw sa kinatatayuan ko. Hindi ko na alam ang dapat kong sabihin… wala naman akong karapatan na pigilan siyang umalis.

I thought everything is working fine. Ayos pa naman kami sa mall kanina, may nagawa ba akong mali para maging ganito siya?

“Kung wala ka ng sasabihin, I’ll go ahead–”

He was about to turn his back on me but I immediately grabbed his wrist. Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko at nanatiling nakatungo.

“What are you doing?” Xanthos asked and removed his hand from my grip.

Dahan-dahan kong inangat ang tingin ko. Muli akong napalunok nang magtagpo ang tingin naming dalawa. Wala akong makitang emosyon sa mga mata n’ya, hindi ko mabasa ang iniisip n’ya ngayon.

“Wala ba talaga akong epekto sa ’yo? Am I really not seductive nor attractive in your eyes?” I asked, my voice almost came out as a whisper. Pati boses ko nanghihina na rin dahil sa hindi ko matukoy na dahilan.

I don’t want him to leave. I don’t know why but I want him to stay here with me… and it’s not because I have to seduce him, it’s because… I just want him to stay. Gusto ko lang siyang makasama.

My mind went blank. I held both of his cheeks and crushed my lips on his. Halatang natigilan siya sa ginawa ko dahil hindi agad siya nakagalaw. Halos magwala ang puso ko nang dumampi ang mainit n’yang labi sa labi ko.

Natauhan lang ako nang hawakan ni Xanthos ang baywang ko at bahagya akong itinulak palayo sa kanya.

“What the hell are you doing, Kiara?” he asked as his jaw clenched.

“You have to prove me that you don’t find me seductive before I let you leave. You have to prove me that–”

Ako naman ang natigilan nang siya na mismo ang sumiil ng halik sa labi ko. Mas lalong nagwala ang puso ko kaysa kanina dahil siya ang nag-initiate ng halik sa pagkakataong ’to.

I didn’t waste time, I clung my arms around his nape, closed my eyes, and responded to his sensual kiss. Xanthos held my waist and carried me. I instantly encircled my legs around his waist and let him carry me. Dinala n’ya ako sa malapit na table at iniupo ako ro’n habang patuloy akong hinahalikan.

I missed his lips, I’ve been craving for this ever since the first time we kissed at Cad’s bar. It feels heavenly. I forgot everything around us for a moment, all I want to focus on is his warm and soft lips against mine.

Xanthos sensually moved his lips and tongue together with mine. He gently nibbled on my lower lip while his tongue is caressing it. I almost lost my sanity when he pulled me closer to him, making me feel his hardness in between my legs. I let out a breathy moan and moved my hips against his hard bulge.

I gripped his hair when he put his tongue inside my mouth. His warm and moist mouth demanded a response and I voluntarily gave it to him. I kissed him back with equal passion. My knees weakened as his tongue explored the insides of my mouth, tasting my saliva, and playing with my tongue.

His hand reached the hem of my dress. I gasped for air when he put his hand inside my dress and caressed my thigh. I hugged his nape tightly and arched my back. There was a tingling sensation in the pit of my stomach and my heart jolted as my pulse pounded. The feeling he’s giving to me is too overwhelming… I can’t take this anymore.

Tila naghahabol ako ng hininha nang ilayo na n’ya ang labi sa akin. Dahan-dahan kong idinilat ang mga mata ko. Matiim na tumitig siya sa mga mata ko at marahang hinaplos ang pisngi ko.

“Fine,” he muttered and kissed my neck lightly. He buried his face there, my heart raced faster because of his hot breath on my neck.

He continued stroking my thigh with his calloused hand. I bit my lower lip and closed my eyes.

“I’ll give you what you want, I’ll fuck you. You’ll leave me alone after I give you a good fuck, right?” he muttered against my neck. “Tatantanan mo na ’ko pagkatapos, ’di ba?”

Natulala ako nang walang pasabing pinunit n’ya ang dress ko… pero hindi iyon ang nagpatigil sa akin. Tila binuhusan ako ng malamig na tubig dahil sa sinabi n’ya. Agad akong napadilat at itinulak siya palayo sa ’kin.

My hands as well as my lips instantly trembled. My vision became blurry and my whole body shivered. I tried to gulp but there’s suddenly a lump in my throat. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko nang may maramdaman akong kakaiba sa dibdib ko na hindi ko maipaliwanag.

“L-leave,” I mumbled and pointed the door.

Xanthos didn’t move. He’s just staring at me with an unreadable emotion in his eyes.

“U-umalis ka na. I will finally stop bothering you. Just leave as soon as possible. ’Di ba iyon naman ang plano mo? A-ano pang tinutunganga mo riyan?”

I don’t know why my voice is shaking like this. Halos hindi ko na rin maaninag ang mukha n’ya dahil sa nanlalabong paningin ko.

Am I about to cry? Why? I shouldn’t be crying over this. I threw myself at him, normal lang siguro na mababa ang tingin n’ya sa ’kin dahil do’n… kung iba ang magsasabi no’n sa akin, galit ang mararamdaman ko. But hearing it from Xanthos makes me feel pain instead of anger… Mas nangunguna ang sakit na halos natabunan na ang galit na siyang dapat nararamdaman ko ngayon.

I avoided his gaze when my tears finally fell. I immediately wiped my tears and bit my lower lip, trying to stop myself from sobbing.

“I will never bother you again. J-just… just leave me. Hindi ko na kayo paghihiwalayin ni Mom, b-basta umalis ka na at h’wag na h’wag ka ng magpapakita sa ’kin ulit. P-please.”

Nanginginig ang mga kamay na napayakap ako sa sarili ko dahil napunit ang dress ko. Umalis ako sa mesa at bahagya siyang itinulak palayo sa ’kin.

“Kiara,” he murmured and tried to hold my arm but I immediately pushed him away with all the energy I have left.

Kahit nanghihina ang mga tuhod ko, pinilit ko pa rin na maglakad at agad siyang iniwan do’n saka dumiretso sa kuwarto ko.

I’m sure he’ll be gone tomorrow. That man doesn’t give a fuck about me anyway. For him, I’m just an annoying insect that keeps on pestering him. I don’t know why it feels like something is pierced in my heart and it’s giving me a different kind of pain I never felt before… Xanthos Archante is dangerous indeed.

Chapter Seven

Gaya ng inaasahan ko, wala na si Xanthos paggising ko. Hindi na rin naman ako nag-e-expect. Xanthos hates me, he finds me annoying… he will never like me.

“Ano’ng trip mo? Bakit ka pupunta rito?” tanong ni Cad sa kabilang linya.

“H’wag ka munang magtrabaho ngayon. Kailangan ko ng kasama,” sabi ko saka tiningnan ang sarili ko sa salamin bago lumabas ng kuwarto ko.

I’m ready to go, I’m just wearing a black long sleeve mesh crop top with black tube beneath and paired it with a high-waisted jeans. I missed wearing clothes like this. Palagi kasi akong busy sa trabaho.

“Cook breakfast for me. Make sure your ref has lots of beer in it. Tinatamad ako pumunta sa bar mo, gusto ko muna ng tahimik,” sabi ko saka dumiretso sa kusina para uminom ng tubig.

Napakunot ang noo ko nang mapansing may nakatakip sa mesa. Agad kong inangat ang pantakip na kulay red na may butas butas na palaging ginagamit ng mga katulong sa bahay pantakip ng ulam.

Fried rice with egg and bacon? Who cooked this? Xanthos? I thought he doesn’t know how to cook?

Napailing na lang ako at tinakpan ’yon ulit. I won’t eat this, baka hindi masarap.

“Huy, bakit natahimik ka na riyan?”

Natauhan lang ako nang marinig ko ang boses ni Cad sa kabilang linya. Napabuntong-hininga na lang ako at napakamot sa batok ko.

“H’wag ka na pala magluto ng breakfast, dito na ’ko kakain,” sabi ko na lang at kumuha ng spoon and fork sa lagayan saka umupo sa upuan.

I don’t want to waste food and besides, it seems like Xanthos wasn’t the one who cooked this. I’ll give this one a try.

“Parang timang. Nga pala, anong oras ka pala pupunta?”

“Give me at least thirty minutes,” I answered and instantly ended the call.

Napalunok ako saka sinubukang tikman iyon. Napangiwi ako nang mapansing masyadong maalat ang fried rice pati na rin ang itlog. Kung araw-araw ko ’tong kakainin baka magkasakit ako dahil sa alat.

Napailing na lang ako at itinuloy ang pagkain. I’m just eating this because I don’t want to waste food, iyon lang.

Pagkatapos ng ilang minutong pagtitiis kainin ang fried rice na ’yon, nag-toothbrush na ako saka umalis. Hindi na ako naglagay ng make up dahil kay Cadence lang naman ako pupunta.

Dumiretso na ako sa unit ni Cadence. Nag-taxi na lang ako para hindi hassle. I’ve been there for how many times. Madalas doon ako natutulog kapag nalalasing ako nang sobra. I trust Cadence naman, he may be a goofball but he never took advantage of me.

Sa isang high-end condominium natuloy si Cad ngayon, malapit lang sa bar n’ya kaya rito na n’ya ko dinadala kapag lasing na lasing ako. Alam n’ya kasi na magagalit ako kapag inuwi n’ya ako sa bahay ng lasing. Ayaw kong makikita ako nina Dad ng lasing.

Alam ko na ang PIN code ng unit ni Cad kaya hindi na ’ko nag-doorbell. Basta na lang ako dumiretso sa loob.

My forehead creased when Cadence immediately rushed to my direction. He’s wearing a simple t-shirt and short with apron. Cadence is a good cook, he’s way better than me.

“I told you not to cook breakfast for me anymore,” I said and kissed him on his cheek. Nasanay na siguro ako na gano’n ang bati sa kanya.

“Ahm, hindi mo ba nabasa ang text ko? Sabi ko h’wag ka munang pumunta kasi pupunta ’yung mga kaibigan ko,” bulong n’ya. Napakunot ang noo ko saka umiling. Naka-silent ang phone ko.

“Ano naman kung pupunta ang friends mo?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ko.

“Puro lalaki ’yung mga ’yon, e. Baka mailang ka,” tila nag-aalalang sabi n’ya.

“Basta ba hindi sila masamang tao, e. Hindi naman siguro sila killers, ’no?” natatawang sabi ko na lang saka yumakap sa braso n’ya.

“They are killers though,” he murmured.

“Ha?” tanong ko dahil hindi ko gaanong narinig ang sinabi n’ya. Alanganing ngumiti na lang siya saka napakamot sa kilay n’ya.

“Wala, sabi ko umupo ka.”

Hinawakan ni Cad ang kamay ko at pinaupo ako sa couch. Umupo rin siya sa tabi ko saka inalis ang apron na suot n’ya.

“Sabihin ko na lang sa kanila na h’wag ng pumunta,” sabi ni Cad saka kinuha ang phone n’ya at nag-type ro’n.

Hindi na lang ako kumibo at sumandal sa balikat n’ya.

“What’s wrong?” Cad asked and put his phone on the mini table. He held my hand and gently squeezed it. There’s a hint of concern in his voice.

“Wala naman, nasaktan lang ang pride ko,” bulong ko saka napabuntong-hininga.

“Weh? Baka naman brokenhearted ka?” tila nang-aasar pa na tanong n’ya.

“Ewan ko sa ’yo,” sabi ko na lang saka yumakap sa braso n’ya.

Mamaya na ako makikipagkwentuhan sa kanya. Gusto ko munang matahimik kahit saglit. Wala akong ginawa kagabi kundi ang isipin nang isipin si Xanthos.

Cad held my jaw and made me face him. He looks serious while staring at me. I just bit my lower lip and sighed.

“Kiara, what’s wrong? I know there’s something wrong, tell me or–”

I sealed his lips with a deep kiss to shut him up. Mukhang effective naman dahil talagang natahimik siya.

Cadence held both of my cheeks gently and deepened the kiss. I hugged his nape and responded to his sensual kiss. I sat on his lap, his hand goes down until it reached my back. He pulled me closer to him.

Cadence is really one of the best kisser, he can take you to different places and dimensions with just a simple stroke of his soft lips… but Xanthos’ kiss was… Xanthos?

Tila binuhusan ako ng malamig na tubig. Wala sa sariling itinulak ko si Cad. Natigilan naamn siya at napatingin sa ’kin.

“Sorry, I was… carried away,” hinging paumanhin ni Cad saka napakamot sa batok n’ya.

“No, it’s okay. May naalala lang ako,” sabi ko na lang saka napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya.

“Your future step-dad?” tila natatawang tanong n’ya.

“Hindi ’no,” sabi ko na lang at sinubsob ang mukha ko sa leeg n’ya.

Cadence gently stroked my hair. He let me sit on his lap for a few minutes and just stroked my hair quietly.

Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili ko. I never felt this way before while making out with Cad. Hindi lumilipad ang isip ko sa kung sino, hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit bigla na lang sumilpot si Xanthos sa isip ko.

“Hindi ka ba kinikilig kapag magkalapit tayo nang ganito?” tanong ni Cad.

Tumunghay ako at tumingin nang masama kay Cadence. Natawa na lang siya saka kinurot ang ilong ko.

“Hmm, hindi,” natatawang sagot ko. Napaismid naman si Cad.

“Hindi ka normal na babae. Lahat ng naging girl-friends ko nagkagusto sa ’kin, pati nga si Abi, e,” pagyayabang n’ya.

My eyebrow arched.

“Porke hindi nagkagusto sa ’yo hindi agad normal na babae?” natatawang tanong ko.

“Oo naman. Look at me, Kiara. I’m epitome of perfection. I’m handsome, fit, intelligent, rich… and my sense of humor? Dang, I’m perfect. Pati sa sex magaling ako. Lahat na sa ’kin na,” pagyayabang pa n’ya.

“Pati kayabangan,” pambabara ko na lang.

But I kinda agree, Cadence is almost perfect. I don’t understand myself why I didn’t like him romantically.

Natahimik kaming pareho. Hindi na lang nagsalita si Cad at hinayaan akong tumulala. Cad’s presence is enough to comfort me. I honestly want a brother like him.

“Kiara.”

Natigilan ako sa pag-iisip at napatingin kay Cad na seryosong nakatitig sa ’kin. Napabuntong hininga siya saka inipit ang ilang hibla ng buhok ko sa ilalim ng tainga ko.

“May gusto ka na sa kanya, ’di ba?”

Natigilan ako sa tanong n’ya.

“Kanino?”

“Kanino pa ba? E ’di sa future step-dad mo kuno,” natatawang sabi na lang n’ya.

Natawa na lang din ako sa sinabi n’ya.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Lettiere. I don’t like him. Naapakan lang talaga ang pride ko dahil wala akong epekto sa kanya,” sabi ko na lang saka napailing.

Tumango na lang siya kahit ’di siya mukhang convinced. Yumakap na lang ulit ako sa batok n’ya.

“Hello, Cadence, my friend–oh fuck!”

Napapitlag ako sa gulat nang makarinig ng boses. Dali-dali akong umalis sa kandungan ni Cad at umupo na lang sa tabi n’ya. Mabilis kong inayos ang damit ko pati ang buhok ko.

“Gago talaga, kaya pala ayaw mo na kami papuntahin ha. Nakakasama ka ng loob p’re.”

Napatingin ako sa nagsalita. Nakangisi siya sa ’min habang nakapamulsa, may dalawang lalaki pa siya na kasama na hindi ko masyadong makita. Agad namang kinuha ni Cad ang unan sa tabi n’ya saka binato sa lalaki na nasalo naman nito.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko at napatungo dahil sa kahihiyan. Naramdaman ko na lumapit sa ’min ang mga kaibigan ni Cad at umupo sa kabilang couch.

Napatunghay ako at pasimpleng tumingin sa mga kaibigan ni Cadence. Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa kanya na nakaupo sa single sofa habang nakatingin sa amin ni Cad.

There’s no hint of emotions in his eyes but I don’t know why I suddenly felt uneasy.

What the hell is he doing here?

“Guys, kaibigan ko nga pala, si Kiara,” pagpapakilala ni Cadence sa ’kin sa mga kaibigan n’ya.

“H-Hello,” I muttered and smiled at them awkwardly.

I can’t take my eyes off him. He’s staring at me too with an unknown emotion in his dark brown eyes. I still can’t believe that he’s one of Cad’s friends. I feel so uneasy right now, my hands are shaking.

“Kiara, that blonde guy is Ashteroh. The guy next to him, ’yung mukhang gago, si Eron ’yon. ’Yung nakaupo sa single sofa, si Xanthos ’yon.”

Nanatili akong nakatitig kay Xanthos. Of course I know him.

“Lumayas na kayo, baka hindi komportable si Kiara sa inyo,” sabi ni Cadence.

To be honest, Cad’s friends are all handsome. Ashteroh looks like a pure foreigner, mukhang walang bahid ng dugong pinoy rito. His blonde hair makes him look like a Greek God, mukhang suplado nga lang. Eron is dashing too. Parehas sila ng charm ni Cadence, they both look friendly, kumbaga playboy type ang hitsura.

“Hello, Kiara, single ka ba?” nakangiting tanong ni Eron sa ’kin.

Ngumiti lang ako sa kanya saka tumango.

“Ako rin,” sabi ni Eron.

Natigilan ako nang mapahagalpak ng tawa si Cadence. Natawa rin si Eron at nag-apir pa silang dalawa. Napakunot na lang ang noo ko. Ano’ng nakakatawa ro’n?

“Sure ka ba na okay lang sa ’yo na nandito sila? Pwede naman kita ihatid sa inyo ngayon,” sabi ni Cadence saka umakbay sa ’kin.

Pasimple akong napatingin kay Xanthos. Matiim na nakatingin siya sa amin ni Cad. Napaiwas na lang ulit ako ng tingin sa kanya.

Why is he looking at us like that?

“It’s fine,” sagot ko na lang kay Cad saka ngumiti sa kanya.

Inilapit ni Cad ang labi sa tainga ko.

“Bakit mukha kang kinakabahan? Natatakot ka ba sa mga tropa ko? Akong bahala sa ’yo, kurutin mo lang ako kapag gusto mo na magpahatid,” bulong n’ya.

Muli akong napatingin kay Xanthos. Matiim pa rin siyang nakatitig sa ’min. Hindi nakawala sa paningin ko ang pagkuyom ng kamao n’ya pati ang pag-igting ng panga n’ya.

“O-okay,” sabi ko na lang saka mas sumiksik sa tabi ni Cad.

Bakit ganyan siya makatingin sa ’min? Saka bakit nandito pa rin siya sa Pilipinas.

“Ahm, iinom lang ako ng tubig,” pagpapaalam ko saka agad na tumayo.

I didn’t wait for Cadence to respond, I immediately stood up. Nanginginig ang mga tuhod na nagtungo ako sa kusina.

Huminga ako nang malalim at kumuha ng tubig sa ref saka uminom. I wanna go home, but I don’t want to show Xanthos that I’m uneasy around him. I want to show him that he doesn’t affect me at all.

“What are you doing here?”

Napapitlag ako nang may magsalita sa likuran ko. Napabuntong hininga na lang ako at pilit na pinakalma ang sistema ko bago siya hinarap.

I raised my eyebrow and put my hand on my waist. Xanthos crossed his arms over his chest and stared at me. I bit my lower lip because I find him sexy on that pose. He can be a model. Kahit nga nakatayo lang siya, ang lakas na ng dating n’ya.

“Why are you here?” he asked again.

“Because I want to. Cadence is my friend, am I not allowed to stay at my friend’s house? Stop acting like my dad, it doesn’t suit you,” I said with confidence. I don’t have any plans to show him that I’m intimidated by his presence.

“Do you always seat on your friend’s lap?” he asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice, emphasizing the word ‘friend’

Agad na naningkit ang mga mata ko sa sinabi n’ya. Ano’ng gusto n’yang iparating?

“So what if I seat on my friend’s lap? I can kiss my friend, I can sleep with my friend, I can have sex with my friend… I can do whatever I want with my friend, Xanthos. You want me to stop bothering you, right? Bakit ikaw naman ngayon ang nangungulit?” nakangising tanong ko.

His eyes darkened with what I’ve said. Xanthos is usually emotionless, seeing him like this kinda scares me… but I don’t know why I find him hot at the same time. I’m so weird… he made me like this.

“Kung wala ka ng sasabihin, aalis na ’ko.”

Hindi ko na siya hinintay na sumagot at agad ko na siyang iniwan sa kusina saka dumiretso sa living room. Umupo kaagad ako sa tabi ni Cadence.

“Ba’t ang tagal mo? Akala ko nilamon ka na ng ref,” natatawang sabi ni Cad saka umakbay sa ’kin.

Sumunod din agad si Xanthos. Napadako ang tingin ko sa kanya. Walang kibong bumalik na siya sa kinauupuan n’ya kanina.

“Hindi ka ba komportable? Gusto mo yayain ko si Abi?” tanong ni Cad saka marahang hinaplos ang buhok ko.

Kinakabahang napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Hindi ko alam kung bakit kinakabahan ako sa mga tingin n’ya sa ’min. Pakiramdam ko sasapakin n’ya si Cadence ano mang oras.

But why would he do that though? Maybe he’s just irritated or in a bad mood. Of course he’s not jealous. He doesn’t like me, right? He’s just irritated, that’s all.

Why am I trying hard to convince myself with his shit? Why am I so bothered?

Muli akong napatingin kay Xanthos. Nakatitig pa rin siya nang masama sa ’min. Kinuha n’ya ang baso sa mini table saka ininom ang tubig do’n. Umigting ang panga n’ya na tila pinakakalma ang sarili.

“H’wag na, uuwi na rin ako,” sabi ko na lang saka napaiwas ng tingin kay Xanthos.

“May masakit ba sa ’yo? Ba’t ang putla mo?” nag-aalalang tanong ni Cad saka hinawakan ang pisngi ko.

“Wow, Cadence. Sinasadya mo talaga kaming inggitin, ’no?” nakangising tanong ni Eron habang nakatingin din sa ’min. Si Ashteroh naman tahimik lang na nakatutok sa cellphone n’ya na tila walang pakialam sa amin.

“Gusto mo ng umuwi? Ihahatid na kita.”

Tumayo si Cad at inalalayan din ako patayo. Hinawakan n’ya ang kamay ko at akmang aalis na kami nang may humawak sa kabilang braso ko. Halos mapatalon ako sa gulat.

“I’ll take her home.”

Napalingon ako kay Xanthos na seryosong nakatingin kay Cad. Napakunot naman ang noo ni Cadence.

“Ahm, bakit mo ihahatid si Kiara, ’tol?” tanong ni Cad at napakamot pa sa batok n’ya.

“Because she’s my girlfriend’s daughter and we live under the same roof,” Xanthos answered blandly.

Cad’s mouth agape. Eron gasped and covered his parted lips. Si Ashteroh naman na kanina ay walang kibo, napatingin na sa amin.

Gulat na napatingin sa akin si Cad. Kulang na lang yata himatayin siya dahil halos naubos ang kulay ng mukha n’ya.

“W-wait, Kiara, so meaning to say… He’s… He’s the one you are talking about?” he asked, still shocked.

I bit my lower lip and nodded.

“Eron, p’re,” pagtawag ni Cadence kay Eron.

Tumayo naman si Eron saka lumapit kay Cad.

“Bakit, p’re?” tanong ni Eron.

“Pakisalo ako ha, hihimatayin ako,” sabi ni Cad bago saka napasapo sa dibdib n’ya.

Natigilan ako nang basta na lang ako hilahin ni Xanthos paalis sa unit ni Cad. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ako pumalag at nagpatianod na lang sa kanya.

Tahimik kami hanggang makarating sa kotse n’ya. Tahimik din kaming pareho sa biyahe. To be honest, marami akong gustong itanong sa kanya pero hindi ko alam kung bakit walang lumalabas na salita sa bibig ko.

Nakarating na kami sa bahay. Naiinis na hinubad ni Xanthos ang coat n’ya saka basta na lang hinagis sa couch. Umupo siya ro’n at sumandal saka ipinikit ang mga mata n’ya.

Nanatili akong nakatayo sa gilid habang nakatingin sa kanya.

“Bakit ka nandito? Akala ko ba susundan mo si Mom business trip n’ya?” tanong ko.

Xanthos didn’t respond.

“Gaano mo na katagal kaibigan si Cadence?” tanong ko pa pero hindi n’ya rin sinagot. Napabuntong-hininga na lang ako.

Xanthos finally opened his eyes and stared at me. I blinked twice when he stood up and took a deep breath as if he’s trying to calm himself.

Napaatras ako nang humakbang siya papalapit sa ’kin. Muli akong napakurap dahil may kung anong nagwawala sa dibdib ko na hindi ko maipaliwanag. Mas kinakabahan pa ’ko sa sitwasyon ko ngayon kaysa noong nag-take ako ng CPA board exam.

I don’t know how Xanthos managed to be scary and sexy at the same time. He looks scary with his glaring eyes but it also made him look sexier which I found weird. How is that even possible?

“You have to take responsibility, Kiara.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Hinapit n’ya ang baywang ko papalapit sa kanya nang nasa tapat ko na siya. Napasinghap ako at tila wala sa sariling napakapit sa dibdib n’ya dahil sa ginawa n’ya.

“W-what did I do? Why do I have to take responsibility?” I murmured. I felt so weak in between his muscular arms. Pakiramdam ko bibigay ang mga tuhod ko anumang oras, idagdag pa ang puso ko na ayaw kumalma.

“Did you kiss him?” he asked and touched my lower lip gently.

I don’t know but it seems like he put some magic to my soul. I answered his question honestly and nodded.

His jaw clenched while staring at my lips. He took a handkerchief inside his pocket and gently wiped my lips. My mouth parted because of what he did. I absentmindedly stared at him while he’s wiping my lips gently.

“What have you done to me?” He stopped wiping my lips and stared at my eyes.

“H-huh?” I asked, still absentminded.

“You bewitched me,” he mumbled before he crushed his soft lips against mine… and I became helpless once again.

Chapter Eight

I know I shouldn’t respond to his hot and teasing kiss. I’ve decided to finally give up on him but here I am, underneath him while he’s kissing me like there’s no tomorrow.

He held my cheek and deepened the kiss. I encircled my legs around his waist and arched my body. I respond to his kiss with equal hunger, as if our lives depend on our kiss, on this moment.

Nakahiga ako sa couch habang nakapaibabaw siya sa akin. Pakiramdam ko wala ng iba pang pumapasok sa isip ko. Ang alam ko lang, gusto ko ang nangyayari at wala akong balak na pigilan siya.

The sensual movement of his lips against mine, the gentle caress of his calloused hand on my waist, and his hardness pressing against my center make my whole body shiver in too much sensation.

I hugged his nape and pressed my hips against his harder. He let out a manly groan when I started thrusting my hips to feel his hard on. He bit my lower lip harder making me gasped in shock. Xanthos didn’t let the opportunity slide and forced my lips open, thrusting his hot tongue inside my mouth. I groaned and hugged him tighter, giving him more access.

Xanthos put his hand inside my crop top. I gasped for air when he slowly put his hand inside my black tube and fondled my bosom gently. I moaned against his hungry kiss as an unusual electricity rushed through my veins, making my whole system alive.

Xanthos’ rough kiss became gentler. He explored the insides of my mouth slowly unlike earlier. He gently bit my lower lip again and sucked it as if it’s the sweetest thing he ever tasted. I moaned helplessly and sucked his lower lip too. Damn, I want him more than ever now.

“Is it okay if I touch you like this?” he asked in a hoarse voice as he teased my hard nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

“I’ll kill you if you stop,” I mumbled and moaned when he gently pinched my aching nub.

Xanthos let out a manly chuckle and kissed me again. He moved his hips and pressed his hardness against my already wet feminity covered with my underwear and jeans. I suddenly want to remove all of my clothes as soon as possible. I can’t take this heat anymore. Xanthos is bewitching me too.

I lost my inhibitions again when his other hand goes down until it reached the zipper of my jeans. I unconsciously bit Xanthos’ bottom lip when I felt him gently pulling down the zipper of my jeans. Xanthos stopped kissing me and stared at me. I avoided his raking gaze, I suddenly feel embarrassed. I look like a drunk woman right now, begging for him to kiss and touch me more. I bet my face is red all over.

“If you don’t want me to continue, just push me and I’ll stop,” he muttered in a low tone. I just bit my lower lip and nodded.

That will never happen, I don’t want him to stop.

Xanthos stared deeply into my eyes. There was a hint of fire in those sexy dark brown eyes, as if he wants to consume me whole. This is the first time I saw his eyes became align with his emotion. He’s very good at hiding his true feelings but I guess not this time. His heavy breathing, his dark eyes, and his hard on prove how much he wants me too… just like how I want him.

“Ohh.” A helpless moan came out of my mouth when he cupped my bosom in his hand again.

I was disappointed when he suddenly removed his hand out of my tube. It feels like the heat left my body and it feels cold.

“Xanthos,” I mumbled softly.

Xanthos pulled my jeans down. He just threw it somewhere when he finally succeed on removing it from my body. I just bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze.

“I’m sorry in advance, I’ll just buy you another one, hmm?” Xanthos mumbled.

I was just about to analyze what he meant by that but he immediately ripped my mesh crop top off, he also ripped my tube off. Leaving me with only underwear. My cheeks heated and my pulse raced when his eyes turned dark with desire as his gaze went down from my eyes to my breasts. I didn’t bother to cover my exposed bosoms but it doesn’t I’m not embarrassed.

Napailing na lang ako saka umupo. I won’t let embarrassment beat me.

I removed Xanthos’ necktie and threw it somewhere just like what he did to my jeans. I start unbuttoning his long sleeve polo. He just chuckled and helped me. He hastily removed his polo after that and threw it on the floor.

I bit my lower lip as I stare at his tattooed muscular body. He’s the sexiest man I’ve ever seen. His tattoos made him look hotter and he has a sleek, powerful build that makes me feel weak just by staring at it.

I gently touched his hard and tattooed chest. Xanthos held my back, pulled me closer to him, and kissed my lips. I instantly responded and kissed him with equal fire. I honestly couldn’t keep up with his kisses. His kisses are fierce and cruel, devouring my will to suppress.

Muli n’ya akong inihiga sa couch. Hinayaan ko lang siya habang pilit na hinahabol ang ritmo ng halik n’ya.

He’s too eager that I can’t keep up with it anymore… but I like it. It just proved that he wants me so much as I want him.

I gasped in shock when I felt his other hand went down to my underwear and put his hand inside. I groaned against his rough kiss when his hand finally reached my wet feminity. My core feels helpless against his large hand.

“Can I fuck you with my fingers?” he asked in a deep husky voice after he stopped kissing me.

My lips parted with his question. My knees weakened and my flesh quivered against his gentle touch. The tingling sensation is too much to handle, it wants to devour the last string of sanity.

I didn’t answer his question. I just gripped his broad shoulder and arched my body, giving him permission to do what he wants, giving myself fully to him.

Xanthos separated my folds with his fingers and touched my cl-t with his index finger, teasing it. I bit the insides of my cheek when he starts rubbing it gently.

He fondled my breast with his other hand. He squeezed and caressed it while playing with its hard-pebble tip. I gasped and gripped his hair when his soft lips touched my other bosom.

“X-Xanthos,” I mumbled helplessly.

He teased my nipple with his tongue. He whirled his tongue around my aching nub, purposely avoiding my nipple. I groaned and arched my body against him again.

“Xanthos, p-please,” I begged.

Sweats are forming on my forehead because of the unbearable pleasure. I never let anyone went this far. I don’t even let them touch my breasts… but I don’t know why I felt so helpless against Xanthos’ touch and kisses.

“Aahhh, fuck.” I moaned in satisfaction when Xanthos’ finally lashed my nipple with his sinful tongue.

I looked down at him. I unconsciously bit my lower lip when I noticed that he’s staring at me with his dark eyes while licking my nipple. My eyes dilated when he rubbed my cl-t with his index finger faster. I gripped his hair tightly and thrust my hips against his hand.

“Oohhh… X-Xanthos–aahhh!”

I quivered beneath him when he took my nipple into his mouth and sucked it while lapping its throbbing tip with his playful tongue. How can he do that at the same time expertly? Is he planning to make me lose my sanity?

I gasped and covered my mouth when he slowly put his index finger inside my soaking flesh. I inhaled deeply and encircled my arms around his nape tightly.

My whole body trembled as he slowly penetrate his long and slender finger inside my tight hole. I bit my lower lip to stop myself from wailing. It fucking hurts.

Daliri pa lang n’ya nasasaktan na ako, paano pa kaya kung…

“X-Xanthos, p-please… slowly oohhh!”

I gripped his hair tightly when he finally put his finger wholly inside me. My knees shivered with much need and unknown pleasure crawling into my system. His finger inside me and his mouth sucking and licking my nipples are too much to bear for a first-timer like me. I’m really no match for a veteran like him.

“When was the last time?” he asked in a deep voice after he stopped playing with my nipple.

What does he mean by that?

I blinked twice while staring at him. I gulped when I finally realized what he meant. I bit my lower lip. Right, he doesn’t know I’m still a virgin.

“Ahm, s-seven months ago,” I mumbled and turned my gaze away from him.

“Hmm, that’s why you’re this tight,” he muttered while slowly moving his index finger inside me. I just groaned and spread my legs wider for him.

I unconsciously closed my legs when he slid another finger inside me. I moaned helplessly when starts moving his fingers faster inside me. I finally adjusted to the pain I’ve felt earlier, the pain is now bearable.

“You have no idea how many times I played with myself while thinking about you,” he whispered and thrusts his fingers faster inside me.

“Y-you have no idea how many times I touched myself while thinking about you too,” I muttered and looked at him with a drunk-like face.

Xanthos’ eyes darkened with desire. I know he can see it in my eyes too.

“Aahhh! X-Xanthos, faster oohhh!” I can’t recognize my own voice anymore. I never moaned like this before.

Xanthos fucked me with his fingers faster and rougher. My eyes dilated with desire and need and spread my legs wider. Xanthos buried his face on my neck and starts kissing me there as his other hand kneaded on my bosom. My body can’t keep up with the pleasure he’s giving to me. I’m wriggling like a drunk woman beneath him as he pleasures me. I still can’t believe that this is happening, maybe I’m still dreaming… a very steamy dream.

He stroked his fingers faster, sending me into shivers of ecstasy. My toes curled as my back arched while writhing underneath him. Xanthos stared at me while still thrusting his fingers and fondling my bosom. His skillful hands alone can do wonders to my body. I’m so helpless, I can’t think of anything right now, I can only think of overwhelming pleasure that he’s giving to me right now.

“Aahhh… P-please fuck me more, Xanthos,” I muttered while moving my hips against the thrusts of his fingers.

Xanthos smirked and swirled his fingers inside me. I gasped in shock when he starts playing with my cl-t using his thumb while swirling his fingers inside my tight hole. I moaned and writhed helplessly underneath him. This is too much, his fingers are too much to handle.

“X-Xanthos… what are you doing–fuck, aahhh! P-please oohhh…” I gripped his hair tightly when he curved his fingers as he stroked it inside me deep and slow.

“It’s just my fingers but you’re already this wet. You’ll go crazy when I fuck you with my tongue, baby,” he mumbled in a deep and husky voice as he continued pleasuring me with his talented fingers.

“Aahhh, h-harder, please oohhh,” I moaned.

Xanthos obliged and thrusts his fingers faster. My toes curled when I felt something building up in my stomach. I can feel something an unfamiliar and ticklish feeling bulding up in my system that I couldn’t explain.

“X-Xanthos, s-stop, I need to pee,” I mumbled and pushed his chest weakly. Xanthos just let out a sexy chuckle and didn’t stop thrusting his fingers and playing with my cl-t.

“You’re still a virgin, aren’t you?” he asked in his sexiest voice. I gulped and stared at him. How did he know that?

“I-I’m not, you’re wrong–oohhh!” I moaned louder when stroked his fingers deeper. It feels like his fingers are about to reach the depth of my feminity.

“Release it, baby. Give it to me,” he whispered and ravage my mouth with kisses. I moaned against his lips and responded with equal heat.

My legs quivered when an unfamiliar feeling build up in my belly again. I gasped and clasped Xanthos’ ripped arm. He moved his fingers faster. I helplessly moaned against his kisses. I writhed as the ticklish feeling goes down to my damped flesh.

I gently pushed Xanthos’ hard chest, he stopped kissing me and just stared at me. I moaned loudly while he’s still moving his fingers and playing with my cl-t.

“Aahhh…”

I collapsed on the couch when I finally released the strange feeling I’ve been fighting earlier. Xanthos stopped thrusting his fingers and pulled it out of my feminity. He crushed his lips on mine. Even though I’m still weak because of the overwhelming pleasure I’ve just experienced earlier, I still closed my eyes and responded to his wet, coaxing, and slow kisses.

I instantly opened my eyes when I realized what I’ve done. Agad kong itinulak si Xanthos at umatras papalayo sa kanya.

What the hell? Bakit bumigay agad ako nang gano’n gano’n lang?!

“So you’re regretting it now?” he asked. He pulled my legs closer to him. I gasped when he spread my legs again and stared straight into my eyes.

“Y-you! How dare you put those fingers inside me?!” I asked and pointed his right hand.

I gulped and bit the insides of my cheeks when I noticed that his two fingers are still glistening with my fluid. Xanthos just gave me a sexy smirk.

“I’m not done though, I’m about to eat you and fuck you with my tongue… but I think you don’t want that anymore,” he mumbled and slowly pulled my underwear down.

I bit my lower lip when I felt something ticklish in between my legs again.

“Do you want me to fuck you with my tongue?” he asked. He threw my underwear somewhere and slowly spread my legs. “You’re so beautiful,” he muttered while staring at me. My heart throbbed with his remark, he just complimented me for the first time.

I just gulped and avoided his raking gaze. I want him to do that, to fuck me with his expert tongue… but I don’t want to admit it.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he mumbled and buried his face in between my legs… and I was lost to waves of pleasure once again.

---

“Nasaan ka na ba? Bakit ang tagal mo?” naiiritang tanong ko kay Abi sa kabilang linya.

“Chill ka lang, girl. Traffic kasi, e,” pagdadahilan n’ya.

I know she woke up late. Nagsisinungaling pa siya sa akin, e kilalang kilala ko na siya.

“Fine, bilisan mo ha.” Binaba ko na ang tawag.

I took a deep breath and scratched my nape. I woke up as early as possible to avoid Xanthos… pero tanghali na wala pa rin si Abi.

After what happened yesterday, I don’t know how to face him anymore. Desidido na sana akong sukuan siya at hayaan sila ni Mom. Bakit n’ya pa ginawa ’yon? Paano ko pa siya masusukuan n’yan?

I sighed, closed my eyes, and drank my coffee. Nandito ako sa coffee shop na nasa building lang ng company ng pamilya nina Abi. Dito gustong makipagkita ni Abi dahil didiretso na rin siya sa kuya n’ya.

I inhaled deeply when yesterday’s happenings appeared in my memories again. I bit my lower lip and gripped my own hair. Why did I let Xanthos finger-fuck me and… fuck. He was so good that I almost forgot everything even my own name, and his tongue and lips… my goodness.

Napailing na lang ako sa mga pumapasok sa isip ko. Tanghaling tapat, kung ano-anong naiisip ko dahil sa Xanthos na ’yon.

I just shook my head and stood up. Makabili na nga lang muna ng pagkain sa labas. Baka gutom lang ’to, puro kape ang ininom ko.

Lumabas na ako ng coffee shop. Babalik din ako rito pagkatapos kong bumili ng kung ano mang pwedeng kainin. Sigurado naman na male-late nang sobra si Abi.

“Hey, Kiara.”

I was taken aback with that familiar voice. I turned around and a smile formed on my lips when I saw Archer, he’s Abi’s older brother.

“Archer!” pagbati ko rin sa kanya.

Lumapit siya sa ’kin saka umakbay. Napangiti na lang ako at yumakap sa baywang n’ya. Mabait si Archer at masaya kasama kagaya ni Abi.

“What brings you here?” Archer asked and pinched my nose gently.

“Abi and I planned to meet up here, kaso hanggang ngayon wala pa rin siya,” natatawang sabi ko na lang.

“Hindi na talaga nagbago ’yon. By the way, saan punta mo?” tanong n’ya.

“Bibili lang ng makakain sa labas habang naghihintay kay Abi.”

“Samahan na kita, bibili rin ako,” nakangiting sabi n’ya. Napatango na lang ako saka ngumiti sa kanya.

“Stop.”

Akmang lalabas na kami ng building nang may magsalita sa likuran namin. Agad na nanlaki ang mga mata ko dahil pamilyar sa ’kin ang boses na ’yon.

What the hell is he doing here?!

Nilingon namin ni Archer ang pinanggalingan ng boses at tama nga ang hinala ko.

“Mr. Archante, is there a problem? Do you still have something to say?” Archer asked. Maybe he’s here because of business related matter.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. He’s wearing his typical business attire. There’s a beautiful woman beside him, maybe that’s his secretary, nakasuot din kasi ito ng business attire.

Xanthos stared at me with no hint of emotion in his eyes. I just bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze. Bigla akong nailang dahil nakaakbay nga pala sa akin si Archer.

“Kiara will come with me and will you please take your hands off her?” Xanthos asked in a cold tone.

“I beg your pardon?” Archer asked. He seemed pissed-off.

“I said take your hands off her.”

“Who are you to tell me that? Are you Kiara’s boyfriend or what?” Archer asked sarcastically.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko. Bakit parang nagkakapikunan na sila? May alitan na ba talaga sila dati pa?

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. He’s still staring at me with an unknown emotion in his eyes.

“No… I’m her daddy,” Xanthos said and smirked.

Muntik na akong matumba sa sinabi n’ya, maski si Archer ay halatang natigilan.

“My girl…” Xanthos said while staring at me. He put his right hand inside his pocket and touch his bottom lip with his other hand.

“…come to daddy.”

Chapter Nine

I’m still speechless until now. I’m just sitting quietly here inside Xanthos’ car. I don’t even know where he’ll take me, or maybe I don’t care anymore.

Kanina pa ako tahimik, ni hindi ako pumalag sa panghihila n’ya sa ’kin dito sa kotse n’ya.

“What the hell are you doing, Xanthos? Lumayo na nga ako sa ’yo gaya ng gusto mo, e. Bakit mo ba ’to ginagawa sa ’kin?” Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko at nagtanong sa kanya.

Xanthos remained silent. He just tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. Napaiwas ako ng tingin do’n kasabay ng pag-iinit ng magkabilang pisngi ko.

Those darn fingers! Those long and expert fingers!

“I don’t know what happened, Kiara. I don’t know why I’m the one who’s chasing you now. How did you make the tables turn just like that?” he asked and glanced at me. I just sighed and hissed under my breath.

“Hindi ko alam kung ano’ng trip mo sa buhay, Xanthos,” sabi ko na lang at napaismid.

Natahimik na lang si Xanthos pagkatapos no’n. I just bit my lower lip and inhaled the familiar scent lingering in my nose. I can smell Xanthos’ familiar manly scent. I really love the manly scent of his perfume, I love how it mixes to his natural scent. Amoy na amoy ko ’yon lalo rito sa kotse n’ya.

“Where do you want to eat?”

Natigilan ako sa tanong ni Xanthos. Napakunot ang noo ko saka nagtatakang napatingin sa kanya.

“Why do you wanna know?” I asked and raised my eyebrow.

“You said you were about to grab something to eat. Let’s eat together,” he said blandly.

I guess he’s back to his old self again, emptionless jerk.

“No thanks, I don’t want to eat with you,” I said and smiled sweetly.

Why the hell is he doing this to me?

“Eat with me or I’ll eat you… you choose,” he muttered in a low tone.

Agad na nag-init ang mukha ko sa sinabi n’ya, naalala ko na naman tuloy ulit ang mga nangyari kahapon.

“You’re hella rich business tycoon, aren’t you busy?” I asked sarcastically.

“I am,” he answered. I took a deep breath and faced him.

“Then why are you wasting your precious time for this bullshit?”

His intention is clear… he obviously wants to play with my feelings. Tanga na lang siya kung iisipin n’yang magpapa-uto ako sa kanya.

“I’m trying to be flirty here, Kiara.”

Gusto kong matawa sa sinabi n’ya. Iyon na ba ang flirty para sa kanya? Ang hina naman pala n’ya kung gano’n.

“I don’t know what you’re trying to pull right now, but I don’t give a fuck anymore… just take me to a private and quiet restaurant where I can eat peacefully,” I said, mumbling the last sentence.

Xanthos just nodded and didn’t say anything. I sighed and closed my eyes. I don’t know what’s happening to us right now, I can’t read what he’s thinking right now… I don’t understand him at all!

Tumahimik na lang ako at hindi na rin nagsalita. Hinayaan ko na lang siya kung saan man n’ya ako gustong dalhin. Gusto ko na lang makakain, kanina pa ’ko hindi nakain.

Nakarating kami sa garden-like restaurant makalipas ang ilang minuto. Agad na bumaba ng kotse si Xanthos at pinagbuksan ako. Napaismid na lang ako at bumaba ng kotse saka nialgpasan siya.

The restaurant isn’t bad. It’s just a simple glass walled restaurant but it gives off a homey vibes. Marami kasing halaman sa paligid ng restaurant, kaunti lang din ang nakain sa loob at may side na open area.

Hindi ko na hinintay si Xanthos at pumasok na agad sa loob ng restaurant at nagtungo sa bandang open area ng restaurant saka dumiretso na sa table do’n. Umupo na ako, umupo na rin naman si Xanthos.

May lumapit na waiter sa amin at ibinigay ang menu sa amin.

“One carbonara and mango juice,” I said and return the menu to the waiter.

“Pasta Bolognese and… just water,” Xanthos said and gave the menu to the water.

Mukhang hindi siya mahilig sa juice. Napansin ko rin na palaging tubig lang talaga ang iniinom n’ya. Kahit kape hindi siya mahilig uminom.

I just crossed my arms over my chest and looked at the plants outside while waiting for our food. I don’t want to look at him. He looks exceptionally handsome with his gray three-piece suit… Dang it.

“Why aren’t you looking at me?”

Napabuntonghininga ako sa tanong ni Xanthos. Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko saka tumingin sa kanya.

“Tell me honestly, what do you want, Xanthos? Why are you doing this? Do you desperately want to have sex with me?” I asked and raised my eyebrow.

Nanatiling nakatingin nang seryoso sa ’kin si Xanthos. Mukhang hindi man lang siya natinag sa tanong ko.

“What do you take me for?” he asked. He’s still staring at me.

I sighed and scratched my nape. He’s confusing me… Ano ba talaga’ng gusto n’ya?

“You said you love my Mom? If you really love her, why are you doing this then?” I asked as my forehead furrowed.

“When did I say that?” he asked as if it’s just nothing.

I licked my lower lip to calm myself. I mean, yeah, he didn’t say anything like that directly but… damn, he is so twisted!

“So pine-perahan mo lang si Mom, gano’n?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ko.

A smirk formed on Xanthos’ sexy lips. He sighed and touched his bottom lip.

“Is that a joke? In case you don’t know, I’m three times wealthier than your family,” he said and let out manly chuckle.

Ang yabang.

“Iyon naman pala, e. Bakit kayo may relasyon ni Mom kung gano’n? Bakit ka naninira ng pamilya?”

Wala akong pakialam kung below the belt ang tanong ko… Naiinis ako, sobrang naguguluhan ako sa mga kinikilos n’ya.

“I hate explaining myself, Kiara. Let’s just say that I’m an erratic kind of person.” He scratched his eyebrow. “Well, I must commend you for you did great on seducing me. That’s why I have a prize for you.”

Napakunot ang noo ko sa sinabi n’ya. Anong prize ang pinagsasasabi nito?

“I’ll give you a chance. If I find you more amusing than your Mom, I’ll break up with her,” he said and gave me a small smile.

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko at tiningnan siya nang maigi, ina-analyze ko kung nagbibiro lang ba siya o ano.

“Are you pranking me or what? Is this a joke?” I asked suspiciously and raised my eyebrow.

“Mukha ba akong nagbibiro?” tanong ni Xanthos saka sumandal sa sandalan ng upuan. “Let’s have a scoring system… Akira is a good cook, one point for her.”

Napaawang ang labi ko sa sinabi n’ya. Seryoso ba talaga siya? Bakit ba siya nanti-trip ng ganito? All this time I thought Xanthos is a serious and matured guy.

“So, meaning to say, nakipagrelasyon ka kay Mom dahil magaling siya magluto? Kung gano’n naman pala edi sana katulong ang hinanap mo at hindi girlfriend!” naiinis na asik ko.

Xanthos chuckled and shook his head. I just rolled my eyes and hissed.

“You always make me laugh, one point for you.”

Naningkit ang mga mata ko sa sinabi n’ya. Dapat ko bang ikatuwa ’yon o dapat ba akong ma-insulto?

Dumating na rin ang order namin makalipas ang ilang minuto. Hindi ko na lang pinansin si Xanthos at nagsimula ng kumain. Baka matadyakan ko lang siya kapag kinausap ko pa siya.

Pasimple akong tumingin kay Xanthos. Pinanood ko siyang paikutin ang spag sa tinidor n’ya saka kinain ’yon. Napakurap ako nang mapatingin ako sa labi n’ya… sa labi n’ya.

Agad akong napailing sa mga pumapasok sa isip ko.

It seems like X anthos is cute too.

I gasped when Xanthos looked at me. I immediately avoided his gaze, I just drank my mango juice and cleared my throat.

Xanthos took a tissue beside him and leaned forward. I was stunned when he suddenly wiped the side of my lips. I blinked and looked at him with disbelief. I can feel something weird in my heart right now. What the hell is that?

Xanthos crumpled the tissue paper and stared at me. There’s really something in his eyes that will make you stare at it for a long time. Is it because his eyes are beautiful or maybe because his eyes are the only soft features of his face.

“You’re cute, another point for you,” Xanthos said and continued eating his pasta.

I just bit my lower lip and calmed myself. Xanthos’ simple gestures and compliments will give me a heart attack.

---

“Hey! Are you just going to stare at me?” I asked and raised my eyebrow. Cadence just sighed and scratched his nape.

Gusto kong matawa sa hitsura n’ya. Halatang hindi siya nakatulog nang ayos. Gulat na gulat ba talaga siya na si Xanthos ang tinutukoy ko sa kanya? Hindi ko rin naman kasi alam na magkakilala pala silang dalawa, e.

Cadence glared at me and threw me his pillow. Natawa na lang ako at binato ’yon pabalik sa kanya. Lumapit ako sa kanya at umupo sa kama n’ya. Nandito ako sa unit ni Cad dahil gusto ko ng mapagku-kwentuhan. Busy kasi si Abi.

“Ang sama ng ugali mo, Kiarabog. Hindi mo man lang sinabi na si Xanthos pala ang future step-dad mo kuno. Grabe, nakakasama ka ng loob,” pag-iinarte n’ya.

Natawa na lang ako at umupo sa tabi n’ya saka yumakap sa braso n’ya.

“Sorry na, hindi ko naman alam na magkakilala pala kayo ng Xanthos na ’yon, e,” pangangatwiran ko na lang.

Napaismid na lang si Cadence saka inirapan ako. Pinigilan kong matawa, cute din talaga ang baliw na ’to kung minsan.

“Nagtatampo pa rin ako, gaga. Lambingin mo ’ko.”

Binato ko na lang siya ulit ng unan. Puro kalokohan talaga ’to.

“Nagpaalam ka ba kay Xanthos na pupunta ka rito?” tanong ni Cad, naging seryoso ang tono ng boses n’ya.

“Why do I have to?” I asked and rolled my eyes.

“Malamang, teh. Halos patayin na nga ako sa tingin no’n nu’ng huling punta n’yo rito, e,” napapailing na sabi n’ya. “Akala ko ba failed ang pang-aakit mo sa kanya? E, bakit parang hindi naman?”

I sighed and leaned on the headboard of his bed.

“I don’t understand him at all, Cad. Gaano na ba kayo katagal magkaibigan ni Xanthos? Ano ba’ng ugali n’ya?” tanong ko.

Napakamot si Cad sa kilay n’ya saka napahawak sa baba n’ya na tila nag-iisip.

“Hmm, teenager pa lang kami, kaibigan ko na si Xanthos pero tahimik din kasi ang isang ’yon. Hindi siya mahilig magkwento pero kilalang kilala ko na siya. Goal-oriented siya, nabubuhay na lang yata siya ngayon para magawa ang dapat n’yang gawin,” napapailing na sabi n’ya.

“Ano ’yung dapat n’yang gawin?” tanong ko, nagba-baka sakali na sabihin n’ya sa ’kin.

“Sorry ha, wala ako sa posisyon na sabihin ’yon. Pero basta, magulo ang utak ni Xanthos. Wala sa ’min ang nakakabasa ng iniisip n’ya,” sabi na lang n’ya. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako saka tumango.

“I don’t know what he’s trying to pull, Cad. I finally decided to give up my seducing schemes but he’s the one who’s chasing me now.” I sighed.

Natigilan ako nang may pumasok sa isip ko. Agad kong hinawakan ang kamay ni Cad saka mas lumapit sa kanya.

“Cad, magkunwari kaya tayong may relasyon? Para hindi na ako pag-tripan ni Xanthos,” sabi ko saka ngumiti nang matamis sa kanya.

Ngumiti rin si Cad sa ’kin saka inalis ang pagkakahawak ko sa kamay n’ya.

“Ayoko. Ano ako? Rebound?” tanong ni Cad saka inismiran ako.

“Hindi naman rebound ’yon, e! Saka ’di ba sabi mo ayaw mo ’kong masaktan? E ’di ilayo mo ako kay Xanthos, ’di ba kaya ko namang gawin ’yon?” pangungulit ko pa.

“Ahh, ’yung sinabi ko noon na haharapin ko ’yung mananakit sa damdamin mo? Binabawi ko na ’yon, sis. Hindi mo naman kasi sinabi na si Xanthos pala, e. Kung katulad ni Xanthos ang kakalabanin ko, masaktan ka na lang pala–aray! Tangina ha!” reklamo ni Cadence nang hampasin ko ang braso n’ya.

“Takot ka ba kay Xanthos?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ko. Napangisi naman si Cadence.

“Mali ka riyan, sis. Hindi ako takot sa kanya, takot na takot ako. Kaya bahala ka sa buhay mo,” sabi n’ya saka bahagya akong tinulak palayo sa kanya. “Si Xanthos, mas malala pa ’yon kay Arken. Hindi maganda kalabin, hindi rin maganda ka-bonding,” napapangiwing sabi pa n’ya.

Napakunot na lang ang noo ko dahil hindi ko ma-gets ang ibig n’yang sabihin.

“Whatever, ang pangit mo rin ka-bonding!” asik ko saka hinagisan ulit siya ng unan.

What the hell should I do with Xanthos? Pakiramdam ko nagkapalit na kami ng posisyon ngayon… It feels like he’s the one seducing me now.

DUMIRETSO NA ’ko sa bahay pagkagaling ko kay Cadence. Ginabi na ako dahil nawili ako ka-kwentuhan si Cad, nagpunta rin kasi si Abi kaya hindi ako makaalis agad.

Napapitlag ako nang makita si Xanthos sa living room. Nakaupo siya sa couch habang nakatutok sa laptop n’ya. Napaismid na lang ako at akmang lalagpasan siya at hindi papansinin pero bigla siyang nagsalita.

“Saan ka galing?”

I sighed and faced him. Xanthos removed his laptop from his lap ang put it on the mini table. He leaned on the backrest of the couch and stared at me. He’s just wearing a black t-shirt and pajamas, his muscular tattooed arms are visible. I just licked my lower lip and avoided his gaze.

“I’m not obligated to tell you that,” I said and gave him a sweet smile.

Hindi nakasagot si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. Inirapan ko na lang siya saka dumiretso sa kuwarto ko para mag-shower at magpalit ng damit.

Maraming tanong sa isip ko ngayon. Hindi ko maintindihan ang mga katulad ni Xanthos. Hindi ko talaga mabasa ang iniisip n’ya. Hindi ko maisip kung anong motibo n’ya sa ginagawa n’ya ngayon.

Napailing na lang ako at lumabas ng kuwarto ko pagkatapos kong magbihis, simpleng cream two-piece night gown na lang ang sinuot ko.

Naabutan ko si Xanthos na nasa living room pa rin paglabas ko at nakatutok sa laptop n’ya. Inismiran ko na lang siya saka dumiretso sa kusina.

“Oh my God!” I shouted and clasped my chest in shock when I saw a woman cooking in the kitchen.

The woman looked at me and gave me a small smile. She’s wearing a business attire with apron on. She looks familiar, saan ko nga ba ulit siya nakita?

“Hello, sorry kung nagulat kita. By the way, I’m Denise, I’m Sir Xanthos’ secretary,” pagpapakilala n’ya saka bumalik na sa pagluluto.

Pasimple ko siyang sinuri ng tingin. She’s beautiful and she looks sexy with her fitted skirt… secretary lang ba talaga siya ni Xanthos?

“What are you doing here?” I tried not to sound rude but I failed.

Kahit pa secretary siya ni Xanthos, bakit basta na lang nagpapapasok ng kung sino ang lalaking ’yon sa bahay?!

“Ahm, Sir Xanthos said none of you knows how to cook. So I’m here to cook food for the both of you,” she explained professionally.

Hindi na ako sumagot sa sinabi n’ya at basta na lang umalis ng kusina saka pinuntahan si Xanthos sa living room.

“Sino ka para magdala ng kung sino rito sa bahay?!” nakapamaywang na tanong ko.

Xanthos stopped typing on his laptop and looked at me. He put the laptop beside him and stood up to face me.

Nanliit na naman ako, ang tangkad n’ya talaga.

“I brought her here to cook food for us. Don’t worry, she’s a good cook.” he said as if it’s nothing.

I inhaled deeply to calm myself. I suddenly want to punch the hell out of him.

“I can order or buy my own food. Hindi ko kakainin ang niluto ng secretary mo. Baka kung ano pa’ng ilagay n’ya sa pagkain,” naiinis na sabi ko habang nakatingin nang masama sa kanya.

“It’s not healthy for you to eat instant food everyday. She’s harmless, Kiara, and besides–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“No thanks. Pupuntahan ko na lang si Cadence. He’s a good cook too, he’s probably way better than that Denise girl,” I said ang immediately turned my back at him.

Agad akong nagtungo sa kuwarto ko at kinuha ang phone at wallet ko sa drawer. Hindi naman totoong kay Cadence ako pupunta, actually si Abi ang pupuntahan ko dahil paniguradong busy si Cad sa bar ng ganitong oras.

Hindi ko rin alam kung bakit naiinis ako. Ibig sabihin kasi, madalas siyang ipagluto ng Denise na ’yon… and besides, that Denise girl is beautiful. Imposibleng secretary at boss lang talaga ang naging turingan nilang dalawa.

Napailing na lang ako sa mga naiisip ko. Whatever. Bahala sila sa buhay nila.

Napapitlag ako nang si Xanthos ang bumungad sa ’kin paglingon ko sa pinto. Seryosong nakatitig siya sa ’kin na para bang may kasalanan ako sa kanya.

“Where do you think you’re going? Hmm?” he asked while staring at me with his dark and sexy eyes.

“Sinabi ko na kanina, di ba? Just enjoy that Denise girl’s dish and don’t mind me.” I pushed him away.

Lalabas na sana ako nang hawakan ni Xanthos ang braso ko at hinila ako pabalik sa kuwarto. Napasinghap ako nang isandal n’ya ako sa pader saka humawak sa baywang ko.

“Don’t make me mad, Kiara. Cadence will suffer on your behalf,” he muttered and caressed my waist with his calloused hand.

“Who are you to stop me?” I asked and while looking straight into his dark eyes.

“How can I stop you then?” ganting tanong n’ya.

“You can’t stop me,” I said while gritting my teeth and tried to push him again but he’s too strong.

“I guess it’s time to show my seducing skills, huh.” He smirked at me.

Xanthos removed his t-shirt without any warming revealing his tattooed muscular body. I unconsciously bit my lower lip and gulped. What the hell is he doing?!

He encircled his strong arm around my waist and carried me without exerting much effort as if I’m light as a feather. He held my leg with his other hand, encircled it around his waist, and pressed me against the wall again. I gulped while staring at his dark eyes.

“We’re both jealous, right? I guess we have to do something about it,” he muttered in a deep husky voice.

“How about that Denise girl? Nandito pa ba siya?” tanong ko.

“I guess?” Xanthos answered, unsure.

He was taken aback when I pulled his nape closer to me and crushed my lips against his soft one. Mukhang hindi n’ya inasahan na ako ang mag-i-initiate ng halik. Agad din naman n’yang tinugon ang halik ko.

Dapat nandito pa ang Denise na ’yon… at dapat makita n’ya ang ginagawa namin ni Xanthos.

Chapter Ten

WARNING: The whole chapter contains a kinda detailed bed scene. Don’t read this part if you’re not comfortable with it. Thank you.

• • • ~ ~ ~ * * *

My mind was fuzzy while we’re kissing as if our lives depend on it. I can almost familiarize the mint taste of his saliva and the movement of his tongue thrusting in my mouth, exploring its inside, and playing with my tongue. The sound of our wet kisses ignite the fire within my belly. He’s so talented with his tongue and lips. I’m about to lose my sanity.

Hindi ko na maalala kung gaano katagal kaming naghahalikan habang nakaupo siya sa kama ko at ako naman ay nakaupo sa kandungan n’ya… Tila nawalan na ako ng pakialam sa lahat.

“K-kiss me more, Xanthos,” I mumbled.

I hugged his nape and encircled my legs around his waist. I thrust my hips against his to feel his hardness. Xanthos let out a ferocious groan and caressed my waist.

The movement of his lips and tongue became gentler. He held my jaw and stroked it gently with his thumb while savoring the taste of my mouth with gentleness. Every move of his lips against mine makes my insides churned and my knees quivered.

Xanthos removed my silk robe and threw it on the floor while still kissing me. He put his hand inside my night gown and caressed my legs up to my waist.

My mind went blank, all I want right now is to feel his touch and kisses without any hindrances. I pushed Xanthos’ chest gently to stop him from kissing me. I removed my night gown and threw it on the floor too just like what he did.

Xanthos’ eyes turned dark with desire as he raked his gaze at my exposed breasts. Underwear is the only fabric left on my body. This is embarrassing, but his intense stare makes me confident. He can’t take my eyes off me.

I ravaged his mouth with my kisses again. Xanthos didn’t waste time and instantly kissed me back. Xanthos cupped my heaving bosoms with his calloused hands. I moaned against his kisses and rubbed my feminity against his hardness. He’s still wearing his pajamas but I can still feel how hard he is for me.

Xanthos held my waist, he settled me on the bed gently and positioned himself on top of me. He didn’t broke our kiss. We’re still exchanging salivas and playing with each other’s tongue.

My back arched when he tweaked my nipple with his thumb and index finger. He rolled it against his fingers and pulled it gently. I unconsciously bit his bottom lip earning a groan from him.

I was disappointed when Xanthos broke our kiss. He stared at me and gently stroked my swolen lips with his thumb.

“Do you trust me?” he asked.

I don’t know why he’s asking that but I just nodded as a response. Xanthos gave me a small smile and planted a soft kiss on my lips.

Natigilan ako nang bumangon siya at umalis sa kama. My forehead furrowed when he opened my drawer and look for something there… he smiled and took a handkerchief there before he closed it.

“This will do,” he mumbled.

What is he planning to do?

Muling bumalik sa kama si Xanthos. Pumaibabaw siyang muli sa akin saka marahang hinaplos ang pisngi ko.

“I want your eyes covered with this as I pleasure you, Kiara,” he muttered in a deep and sexy voice.

I bit my bottom lip and stared at the white handkerchief he’s holding right now. I’m nervous… but it seems exciting.

“Do what you want,” I whispered, giving him permission to cover my eyes.

Xanthos smirked, he folded the handkerchief and covered my eyes with it. I bit the insides of my cheeks when darkness consumed my vision.

“Remove this blindfold and I’ll stop, Kiara.”

I gasped when I felt something wet on my breast. I let out a soft moan when I realized that it was his tongue. I felt a tingling sensation on my belly when he flicked my nipple with his tongue while fondling my other bosom with his rough hand.

“X-Xanthos, aahhh…”

He lapped my nipple with his tongue. I almost lose my marbles when he starts licking both of my nipples alternately. I gasped and gripped his hair. The fact that I can’t see what he’s doing excites me more.

“Fuck!” I shouted when he finally sucked my aching nub like a hungry baby.

My mouth agape while catching my breath. He’s sucking my nipple deep in his mouth while lapping it with his tongue. I don’t know what’s happening to me anymore. Nasisiraan na yata ako ng bait.

I was still catching my breath when Xanthos stopped playing with my nipples. I unconsciously bit my lower lip. I can already feel the sweat all over my body even though my room is air-conditioned.

I gulped and gripped the bedsheets. Pinakiramdamdaman ko ang kilos n’ya. I felt him moved but I don’t know what he’s doing.

I gasped when I felt his hand on my underwear. He pulled it down gently and took it off my body. I licked my bottom lip when his strong hands held both of my legs and spread it wider.

“Aahhh!” I moaned loudly when I felt his soft lips on my wet center.

Xanthos nibbled on my cl-t with his lips. I buried my head on the bead and gripped his soft hair while he’s teasing my feminity with his sinful mouth. He rubbed my thighs gently, trying to calm me down. I tried to close my legs but his head is in between.

He spread my legs wider. I moaned louder when I felt his fingers separating my folds and licking the insides of my core. My eyes dilated against the handkerchief covering my eyes.

“Fuck! X-Xanthos, aahhh! Lick me more, please. Oohhh…”

Xanthos gladly obliged. I almost lost it when the movements of his tongue became faster. My lips parted and my knees quivered as well as my legs when he lapped and stroked my insides with his expert tongue. This is too much, he’s planning to make me lose my mind.

His tongue went down from my cl-t to the hole of my core. I wailed like crazy when his tongue teased the hole of my feminity. I gripped his hair tighter but he doesn’t seem to mind and just spread my legs wider.

“X-Xanthos… this is too much, aahhhh! P-please oohhhh!”

I cried when he moved his tongue faster on my hole. My toes curled when he starts thrusting the tip of his tongue in and out of my wet core. How can his tongue moves and thrusts this fast? I’m about to lose my mind because of his expert tongue.

“Aahhh… Xanthos, I-I’m about to–oohhh!”

I’m fighting the urge to remove my blindfold but I don’t want him to stop.

My insides churned when I felt something building up in my tummy. I gasped when I felt Xanthos’ finger playing with my cl-t while licking and lapping my hole. I bit my lower lip and writhed on the bed. I can’t take this anymore… This is too much.

“Aahhh…” Convulsive waves of pleasure gripped me.

I collapsed on the bed when I finally had my release. My knees are literally shaking as I catched my breath. Xanthos on the other hand continued licking my core. I bit my lower lip and tried to push his head away from my center but he just spread my legs wider and continued lapping his tongue there.

“X-Xanthos, oohhh…” I mumbled weakly. My flesh is still sensitive because I just had my release but he’s still licking and sucking it. He’s really determined to make me lose my marbles.

I was panting hard when he finally stopped licking my center. I gulped and removed my blindfold with shaking hands. My vision was still blurry.

Even though I’m still weak because of that mind-blowing orgasm I still did my best to get up and stared at Xanthos. I bit my lower lip when I realized he’s now wearing nothing too just like me. My eyes went down to that thing in between his legs. I gasped and covered my mouth when I finally saw it.

Damn, it’s so huge and long! Will that thing even… Will it fit inside me?

Umalis ako sa kama at lumuhod sa harapan n’ya. Halatang natigilan siya sa ginawa ko at bahagyang napaatras pero hinawakan ko kaagad ang hita n’ya.

“I want to make you feel good too,” I mumbled and looked at him.

“Y-you don’t have to do this,” he said in a low tone. This is probably the first time I heard him stutter.

I looked at his huge c-ck again that’s in front of me right now. I’m honestly not confident right now and I’m afraid he might not be satisfied with what I’m about to do… but I still want to do it.

I gulped and covered my eyes with the blindfold again. I don’t want to see his reaction while I’m doing it. It’s kinda embarrassing.

Xanthos let out a manly groan when I touched his pulsating hard c-ck with my shaky hand. I touched the tip of his length and teased it with my thumb. I took a deep breath before I licked the tip of his hardness with my tongue. I flattened my tongue under his sensitive tip and gently rubbed it.

“Fuck.” Xanthos cussed under his breath.

I’m still a virgin but that doesn’t mean that I know nothing about this kind stuff.

I’m rolling my tongue on its tip while moving my hand up and down on the base of his c-ck. Xanthos gripped my hair tightly while panting hard. That boosted my confidence… he likes what I’m doing.

I slid the head of his c-ck in my mouth. I tried to calm myself. It’s just the head of his shaft but my mouth felt full already. I just did my best not to scratch his c-ck with my teeth and licked the tip of his cock while slowly putting it into my mouth.

“Fuck, Kiara… Ahh.” His moans sounds sexy as hell.

He gripped my hair tighter and moved his hips against my mouth. I held his thighs, trying to stop him from thrusting his hips and shoving his c-ck deep into my mouth. I can’t handle his size. I can’t even put the half of it inside my mouth.

“What the fuck are you doing to me? Fucking hell, ahh…” Xanthos moaned when I sucked his huge c-ck and tried to penetrate it deeper into my mouth.

I can feel him panting heavily and moaning while gripping my hair. It’s kinda painful but it’s bearable. I don’t know why but I like him gripping my hair while losing his inhibitions.

I stopped putting his c-ck deeper in my mouth because I’m already tearing up. I start moving my head up and down, sucking his c-ck while licking its tip.

“Fuck, ahh…” Xanthos thrusts his hips gently and shoved his c-ck deeper into my mouth.

I also moved my hands up and down to the base of his c-ck. I removed my blindfold with my other hand and looked at him. I want to see his reaction, I want to see how good I make him feel.

Xanthos’ muscular body is glistening with sweat. The muscle on his arms are moving as he gripped my hair and moved his hips. He looks so hot in every angle. He’s bitting his lower lip, his eyes are closed, and he’s head was tilted upward. He looks magnificent right now… so hot.

I was taken aback when he suddenly held both of my arms and pulled me up to stop me from what I’m doing. Inihiga n’ya ako sa kama saka pumaibabaw sa akin.

“I-I’m not yet done,” I mumbled. He just stared at me with his intense eyes.

“Where the hell did you learn that?” he asked in a deep husky voice.

I bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze.

“F-from books and… porn,” I mumbled.

“You haven’t done it to anyone yet?” he asked and touched my lower lip with his thumb gently.

I just nodded as a response… Why is he asking that?

“Good,” he mumbled.

I was about to ask him why but he immediately cupped my face and kissed my lips. I instantly responded to his kiss and played with his tongue inside my mouth. He massaged my bosoms gently then rougher, then gentle again while playing with its tips using his fingers.

“Push me if you don’t want me to go further,” Xanthos whispered against our kiss.

I hugged his nape and encircled my legs on his waist. He released a fierce groan when the tip of his c-ck touched the entrance of my wet center.

“Fuck me, don’t stop fucking me until I can’t take it anymore. Fuck me hard with your huge d-ck… in any position you want,” I mumbled and looked at him with drunk-like face.

I saw how his jaw clenched and his eyes darkened with desire.

“I hope you won’t regret that… because no one can stop me now.”

He spread my legs wider and settled himself in between. I took a deep breath to calm myself and bit my lower lip. Xanthos just stared at me as if I’m his priceless possession.

“You’re beautiful and everything about you feels wonderful,” he mumbled before he gently slid his c-ck inside me.

I gasped and gripped his broad shoulder. Xanthos caressed my waist and kissed my lips as he slowly penetrate my core with his huge and hard length. I bit my lower lip to restrain myself from sobbing. It freakin’ hurts like fuck!

“Relax, you’re too tensed,” he mumbled and planted soft kisses all over my face down to my jaw and my neck.

“I-it hurts, Xanthos,” I muttered weakly and gripped his shoulder tighter. My vision became blurry as tears dwelled in my eyes.

“Do you want me to stop?” he asked and caressed my cheek gently.

“N-no… don’t stop,” I mumbled and hugged his nape.

I thrust my hips towards him earning a groan from him. I let out a soft sob when pain stabbed me again.

Xanthos spread my legs wider and slowly penetrate his c-ck deeper into my tight opening. My nails scratched on his back when he slowly pull his d-ck out and shoved it again inside. Damn, his length is huge and long… I bet he didn’t even manage to put the half of it inside me. Now I understand why it hurts like fuck.

“X-Xanthos, aahhh…”

Xanthos played with my bosom while thrusting slowly above me. He sucked the skin on my neck and ran his tongue there. I felt the waves of pleasure on my belly down to my core.

“X-Xanthos… slow down–aahhh!”

He starts thrusting inside me faster. My mouth agape when pain subsided the pleasure I was about to feel earlier. His thrusts are becoming rough and fast, it feels like my feminity is tearing apart.

“X-Xanthos… s-slowly, please.” I tried to push his chest but he just held both of my wrist and pinned it on the bed, side by side, and shoved his c-ck deeper inside me. I wailed and writhed underneath him.

It feels like he finally lost his self control.

“Fuck, so good… ahh,” Xanthos moaned while bitting his lower lip.

He pulled out almost all the way, then shoved his c-ck deeper. My eyes dilated as my toes curled. My mind went blank. I don’t understand what I feel anymore. There’s still pain, but it’s no bearable unlike earlier, and the pleasure is now trying to take over.

“Xanthos, fuck me more. Own me… Aahhh,” I moaned and arched my back to give him easy access.

Xanthos stopped thrusting and let go of my wrists. He raised his body and stared at me. I looked at him with confusion in my eyes. I gasped in shock when he held both of my thighs and raised it in the air. I bit my lower lip when I saw his muscles clenched as he moves.

“Aahhh! X-Xanthos!”

I gripped the bedsheets tightly when Xanthos starts thrusting again. He slammed his c-ck much deeper and his thrusts became rougher. Our position feels awkward. My butt is raised while he’s holding both of my legs, pulling it closer to him as he thrusts deeper. I gripped my own hair and cried due to the unbearable pleasure he’s giving me.

I can’t take my eyes off his clenching biceps and arms as he moves my legs, pulling it closer to him while thrusting deeper and rougher. My lips parted to catch my breath. I want to move my hips against his but I can’t move it since he’s the who’s taking control of my movements and my hips and butt are raised, it’s hard for me to move with his rhythm.

“You feel so good, fucking good,” he mumbled in a deep sexy voice while staring at me with his intense eyes.

I bit my lower when I feel something building up in my belly again. My eyes dilated and my lips parted, I know I look like a sex-starved woman right now but I don’t care anymore.

“X-Xanthos, I-I’m almost there, aahhh…” I tried to reach for his hand.

Xanthos let go of my legs and collapsed on top of me again while still slamming his c-ck inside me. I held his right hand and put it on my neck.

“Choke me with this strong hand, p-please.” I mumbled while staring at him. “Choke me, daddy,” I whispered and bit my lower lip.

I just called someone ‘daddy’ aside from my father… Damn, I’m not myself anymore.

Xanthos’ eyes darkened. He licked his lower lip and closed his eyes as if he’s trying to control himself.

I want to be choked and spanked while having sex. That’s one of my sexual fantasy.

Xanthos gladly obliged and choked me with his large hand while thrusting roughly inside me. My knees and legs quivered in too much pleasure, his hand on my neck and him thrusting like a madman inside me is taking the last string of my sanity away.

Xanthos held both of my hand with just one hand and pinned it above my head. His other hand is still around my neck, choking me, while thrusting his hips faster and rougher. My wet insides clenched around his c-ck earning a sexy moan from him.

“Aahhhh… Hmm,” I moaned when the sensation sizzled through every part of me.

Xanthos is still thrusting even though I already had my release. His movements became desperate as if he’s catching something. His grip on my hand and on my neck became tighter. I just bit my lower lip and gasped for air while staring at him… The way he bit his lower lip, part his lips, and closed his eyes are so erotic and hot.

“X-Xanthos…”

My toes curled when I feel his c-ck becoming bigger as he thrusts. He let out a groan and moved his hips faster.

I gasped when he suddenly pulled his length out of my core without any warning. My lips parted when he let go of my wrists and neck.

“W-what are you going to—” hindi ko na natapos ang sasabihin ko nang walang pasabing pinadapa ako nito sa kama.

He took the handkerchief beside us. He tied both of my wrist with it around the headboard. My mouth agape in shock, but an unknown feeling rushed through my veins… Why do I find this so exciting?

“Hmp!” I was shocked when he suddenly spanked my butt with his large hand. He spanked my butt hardly that it almost went numb.

“Do you still want me to continue?” he asked and spanked my butt again. I unconsciously groaned clenched my fist. My insides churned due to excitement. Damn. Xanthos just unleashed a beast inside him.

“S-spank me again, please,” I mumbled and raised my butt for him.

Xanthos gladly obliged and spanked me again. I gasped when he suddenly pulled my hair tightly. He spread my legs wider and shoved his c-ck from my behind without any warning.

“Fuck,” he muttered and pulled my hair tightly.

It’s painful, it feels like he finally lost control of himself but I find it so pleasurable and erotic. I want him to lose his mind just like what he did to me.

“Aaahhh! X-Xanthos, please fuck me harder… oohhh!”

I can’t recognize my own voice anymore while Xanthos is thrusting like a beast on my behind. My core feels so stretched in this position but it feels good, and his hand pulling my hair makes it more erotic.

“Damn.” Xanthos moaned when my feminity tightened against his c-ck.

“Xanthos… oohhh.” I collapsed on the bed when I had my release again.

Xanthos continued banging his c-ck like a madman. He held my waist tightly and rode the hell out of me as if this will be the last time.

“Fuck, ahh…” Xanthos pulled his c-ck out.

I bit my lower lip when I felt his d-ck in thrusting in between my buns. His movements became slower and slower before he finally stopped. I lick my bottom lip when I feel something sticky dripping on my back. He finally came.

We remained silent for a while. He stroked my hair gently and massaged my scalp. I bit the insides of my cheeks because of that gesture.

“I’m sorry, does it hurt?” he asked softly.

“I’m fine… you pulling my hair like that, I loved it so much,” I mumbled and closed my eyes.

I gasped and opened my eyes when I felt his c-ck throbbed on my behind again… Is he turned on again? Damn. It seems like Xanthos has a raging libido.

Napasinghap ako nang tanggalin n’ya ang pagkakatali ng kamay ko saka muli niya akong pahigain nang ayos sa kama. He got off the bed and pulled me up. He held my waist and carried me like I’m just a piece of paper. I instantly encircled my legs around his waist. He made me sit on the table nearby and spread my legs.

He raised my butt and gave it a hard slap before he shoved his hard length inside me again. I moaned and gripped the table in surpise. Xanthos gave my butt another hard slap before thrusting his hips like a sex-starved man. He pulled me closer to him and licked my earlobe. My whole body shivered when he whispered something.

“Damn, you’re a masochist, baby… I’ll make you feel good.”

Chapter Eleven

My whole body never felt this painful before. My arms, my legs, my calves, my waist, my swollen ass, my scalp, my neck, even my wrist and lips especially my center are aching like hell. It feels so good last night that I never thought that the aftermath will be torturous.

Xanthos is insatiable. He literally rocked my world last night… until dawn. My eyelids are heavy, I can’t even open my eyes right now. I just slept for 3-4 hours because of Xanthos.

“Let me go,” I muttered and tried to remove Xanthos’ arm around my waist.

I need to take a shower. Xanthos cleaned me up before we slept but it’s not enough. Maarte pa naman ako sa katawan.

Xanthos just groaned and hugged me tighter. I fought the urge to roll my eyes. Sigurado ako na gising na siya at nag-iinarte lang. Dapat siguro sampalin ko siya para talagang magising na siya.

“Xanthos, I’ll take a shower. Let me go before I kick your ass,” I warned him.

“Let’s sleep more,” he mumbled and nuzzled his face on my neck. I unconsciously bit the insides of my cheeks. His voice sounds inappropriately sexier in the morning.

I just sighed and let him hug me. I stroked Xanthos’ curly hair gently and rolled it around my index finger.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Nakapapikit pa rin siya habang nakayakap sa baywang ko. Habang natititigan ko siya nang ganito, bigla akong napaisip na medyo ka-hawig n’ya si Zayn Malik. They both have long and curly eyelashes and sexy lips. I just shook my head and continued stroking his hair.

Bumigat na ang paghinga n’ya at lumuwag ang pagkakayakap n’ya sa baywang ko makalipas ang ilang saglit. Mukhang kulang talaga siya sa tulog at napagod. Sino ba namang hindi?

I removed his arm around my waist gently. I covered him with comforter and let him sleep peacefully like a baby.

Sinubukan kong bumangon. Napangiwi ako at napakagat sa ibabang labi ko nang makaramdam ako ng kirot sa pagitan ng mga hita ko. Pakiramdam ko makakalas ang buong katawan ko dahil sa pananakit.

I glared at Xanthos. This is all his fault. He was too insatiable last night.

Kahit nahihirapan akong tumayo, pinilit ko pa rin saka umupo sa malapit na upuan para tingnan ang hitsura ko sa vanity mirror. I’m wearing Xanthos’ t-shirt right now.

“Fuck.” I hissed under my breath when I saw my face in the mirror.

Sabog ang buhok ko, halata rin sa mata ko na kulang ako sa tulog, in short, mukha akong bruha. Napakunot ang noo ko at napatingin kay Xanthos na mahimbing pa ring natutulog.

He still looks like a Greek God even though he seemed tired. Damn, this is so unfair! Bakit ang guwapo n’ya pa rin?!

Kinusot ni Xanthos ang mata n’ya at kinapa ang katabing puwesto n’ya habang nakapikit pa rin. Napangisi ako habang nakatingin sa hitsura n’ya ngayon. He’s obviously looking for me.

“Kiara,” he mumbled and opened his eyes.

Agad siyang napatingin sa ’kin. Tinaasan ko na lang siya ng kilay. Bumangon naman siya habang napapakamot sa batok n’ya.

“Come here,” he mumbled and tapped the space beside him.

“No, I don’t want to. I’m hungry and I need to take a shower.”

Sinubukan kong muling tumayo pero napaigik na lang ako nang muling kumirot ang pagitan ng mga hita ko. Napatayo naman si Xanthos at agad na lumapit sa ’kin. He held my arm gently and he was about to carry me but I instantly stopped him

“I can manage,” I muttered and pushed him gently.

I know where this shit leads. Magvo-volunteer siya na siya ang magsh-shower sa akin… tapos sa iba rin ’yon mauuwi.

“I know your body hurts like hell, I won’t do what you’re thinking right now, Kiara,” he said while staring at me. He looks serious, well, he always looks serious but this he seemed offended. Medyo nakonsensya naman ako ro’n.

Natahimik na lang ako sa sinabi n’ya at napaiwas ng tingin. I want to say sorry but I’m too embarrassed to say it.

Hindi na ako kumontra nang buhatin ako ni Xanthos at dinala sa bathroom.

WE’RE STILL quiet when we finally finished taking a bath. Halos si Xanthos na ang nagpaligo sa akin dahil maski pag-angat ng braso, hirap na hirap ako.

“Come here,” Xanthos signalled me to come closer to him. He’s sitting on my bed with only boxer shorts on. I’m so distracted with his exposed body.

Napatikhim na lang ako at paika-ikang lumapit sa kanya. Kinuha ni Xanthos ang underwear ko na nakahanda na sa kama saka inalis ang pagkakabuhol ng robe ko at hinubad ’yon sa akin.

I’m fully naked in front of him now. Xanthos just turned his gaze away from my body and cleared his throat. It seems like he’s having a hard time right now.

“X-Xanthos, I can do that,” I murmured and bit my lower lip.

“I’ll do it,” sabi na lang n’ya saka pinasuot sa akin ang underwear ko. Wala na akong nagawa kundi iangat ang paa ko saka hinayaan siyang isuot sa akin iyon.

Halos umusok ang magkabilang pisngi ko nang matapos na n’yang isuot sa ’kin ang underwear. Isinunod naman n’ya ang flowy dress ko at isinuot din sa ’kin ’yon. Hindi na lang ako kumontra at hinayaan siya.

“What do you want to eat?” he asked while staring at me.

“Anything as long as it’s edible,” I mumbled and turned my gaze away from him.

Xanthos carried me again. Lumabas kami ng kuwarto ko at nagtungo sa kusina saka ahan-dahan n’ya akong iniupo sa upuan.

“Let’s just order something to eat,” he said and took his phone.

“Sa mga nababasa kong romance books… after a wonderful sex, men will wake up early in the morning to cook something for their woman,” I said and raised my eyebrow at him.

“But I don’t know how to cook, should I just call my secretary again to cook for–” I immediately cut him off.

“Shut up. Just order something to eat, anything is fine.” I glared at him.

Speaking of that secretary girl. I forgot about her last night. Ang agenda ko talaga kagabi ay ang mahuli n’ya kami ni Xanthos… bakit nawala na ’yon sa isip ko?

“Damn,” I mumbled and bit my lower lip.

Napangiwi ako at inayos ang upo ko. My butt hurts. Ang tigas pa naman ng inuupuan ko ngayon. Masyadong nanggigil si Xanthos do’n kagabi… but it’s fine, I liked it anyway.

Natigilan ako nang umupo si Xanthos sa tabi ko. Hinila n’ya ako patayo at pinaupo sa kandungan n’ya. Akmang tatayo na ako nang yakapin n’ya ang baywang ko nang mas mahigpit.

“Does your ass cheeks hurt that much?” he asked with a hint of concern and worry.

“It’s bearable,” I mumbled softly.

“How about your neck? Let me see,” he said and touched my neck gently and stroked it with his thumb softly.

“I’m fine. Mawawala rin ’yan,” sabi ko na lang at inalis ang kamay n’ya sa leeg ko.

I can’t let him touch me like that again. I can feel a tingling sensation in between my legs again just because of his simple touch.

“Do you really like hard sex?” he asked and pulled my waist closer to him.

“Yeah. By the way, thank you for letting me experience it. I now have something to show off to Cadence,” I said and smiled sweetly at him.

Xanthos’ forehead creased and his eyes darkened. I don’t know why but for some reason, his reaction gave me a sense of satisfaction.

“Why? You’ll do that with Cadence too?” he asked.

I fought the urge to laugh my ass off when I saw his jaw clenched. The ‘pretty mad Xanthos’ looks ten times hotter than the ‘emotionless jerk Xanthos’

“Of course. I’ll let him spank my ass too, I’ll let him choke me and fuck me hard as I call him ‘daddy’. I just can’t do that with him since I’m still inexperienced. But the situation is different now, I can finally have sex with him,” I said and smiled sweetly at him, pissing him off.

Xanthos remained silent. I stared at him and tried to know what he’s thinking right now.

“You won’t be able to do that if he’s dead. I mean, he wouldn’t be able to spank you, choke you, and fuck you if he’s dead, right?” he asked in a serious tone.

Napakurap ako sa sinabi n’ya. He sounded like he will and he can kill Cadence for real. Alam kong hindi naman siya seryoso sa sinabi n’ya pero kinabahan ako nang kaunti.

“I’m just kidding. Cad is just a friend to me. Well, we made out a lot of times before. He’s a good kisser and–”

“Kiara.” He warned me. I just bit my lower lip to restrain myself from smiling.

“What I mean is, I don’t see Cadence as my lover. I won’t do that with him because I only see him as a friend,” paliwanag ko.

“So, you see me as a lover then?” he asked. I rolled my eyes and punched his chest gently.

“Of course not, baliw ka ba? I don’t like commitments, but I might consider it if you will end your relationship with Mom,” I said and playfully ran my fingers on his chest.

The dragon tattoo on his chest looks magnificent. I just can’t stop admiring his body covered with tattoos, it looks sexy on him.

“We’re still on the scoring system. I’ll give your Mom another one point because she never made me jealous,” he said and pulled me closer to him. “But I’ll give you another point because I can kiss you,” he mumbled and gave me a gentle kiss on my lips.

I looked at him with confusion in my eyes.

“You mean, you can’t kiss my Mom? Why?” I asked as my forehead creased.

“That’s… a secret,” he muttered and let out a sexy chuckle.

What does he mean by that? I’m curious as hell but it seems like he’s determined not to tell me the reason. I just sighed and scratched my nape.

Whatever, I’ll just ask him another question.

“When did you start having tattoos?” I asked and ran my fingers on his tattooed chest again, down to his ripped abs, there are also tattoos there.

“I was eighteen when I had my first tattoo. It’s here on my right arm,” he said and showed me his right arm. There’s a eagle-like tattoo there. Right, this tattoo kinda looks old.

“Hindi ba masakit?” tanong ko saka marahang hinaplos ang braso n’ya.

“It was painful when I was eighteen. I get used to it as time goes by.” He took my hand and gave it a soft kiss. “Do my tattoos look disturbing to you?” he asked and buried his face on my neck.

Why is he being clingy and touchy? Is he aware that my heart is beating like hell right now?!

“No, it’s not disturbing. I honestly find your tattoos sexy. Do you still have plans to have another tattoo?” I asked and gently stroked his curly hair.

“Hindi na siguro. I will stop having tattoos if I finally finished my only goal in life… I can feel it will happen sooner,” he muttered and looked at me.

My forehead furrowed because of the way he looks at me right now, am I related to his goal?

“Ano ba’ng goal mo?” tanong ko kahit walang kasiguraduhan na sasagutin n’ya iyon.

Xanthos gave me a small smile and caressed ny cheeks gently while staring at me.

“To be happy… my only goal is to be happy, Kiara.”

---

“Wow, akala ko kinalimutan mo na ’ko kasi ilang araw kang walang paramdam,” tila nagtatampong sabi ni Cadence at nakamapaywang pa.

“I was just busy, okay?” I said and rolled my eyes at him.

Hindi lang naman ako nakakapunta dahil pinapagaling ko pa ang ilang pasa sa katawan ko pati na rin ang paika-ikang paglalakad ko. Sa sobrang tsismoso ni Cad, malamang tatanungin n’ya ako nang maigi kung saan ko nakuha ang mga ’yon. Kahit ganyan si Cad, matalino siya. Mage-gets n’ya agad kung saan galing ang mga ’yon kung sakali.

Xanthos didn’t go to work for the past days too. Sa bahay n’ya dinala ang paperworks n’ya dahil kailangan n’ya raw akong bantayan dahil masakit ang katawan ko kahil ilang ulit ko ng sinabi na kaya ko naman ang sarili ko.

“Akala ko kinalimutan mo na ’ko dahil masyado kang busy kay Xanthos, e. Muntik na ’kong magselos,” napapailing na sabi n’ya.

“Saka ka na magselos kapag hindi ka na takot kay Xanthos,” pambabara ko sa kanya.

Natigilan ako nang batuhin ako sa mukha ng unan ni Cad. Tiningnan ko siya nang masama saka binato ’yon pabalik sa kanya. Walang hiya talaga ang lalaking ’to!

“Hindi naman kasi ako takot kay Xanthos–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“Takot na takot?”

“Hindi, tanga. Nagjo-joke time lang kasi ako no’n. Pangit mo ka-bonding ha, ’di ka maka-gets ng sarcasm,” nakasimangot na sabi n’ya at umupo sa couch, sa tabi ko, saka humiga at umunan sa kandungan ko. Hinayaan ko na lang siya.

“It didn’t seem sarcasm to me,” I said and raised my eyebrow. Cadence glared at me and gripped my chin tightly.

“Aw!” I grimaced and slapped his hand.

“Nga pala, pinayagan ka ba ni Xanthos dito?” tanong n’ya.

Napangisi ako.

“Akala ko ba hindi ka takot kay Xanthos?” natatawang tanong ko.

“Tanginanto, nagtatanong lang, e.” Pumikit na lang siya at umayos ng higa sa kandungan ko.

“I don’t need his permission, Cad. Hindi ko naman siya tatay,” sabi ko na lang saka sumandal sa backrest ng couch.

I called him ‘daddy’ when we had sex but it doesn’t mean that… wait, what the hell am I thinking?

“Kumusta naman ang pang-aakit mo kuno sa kanya?” tanong ni Cad at idinilat ang mga mata n’ya saka tumingin sa ’kin.

Nag-init ang magkabilang pisngi ko sa tanong n’ya. Hindi ko na rin talaga alam kung ano na ang nangyari.

“Ewan,” sagot ko na lang saka napakagat sa ibabang labi ko.

Napabuntonghininga si Cad saka bumangon. Seryosong tumingin siya sa ’kin. Minsan kinakabahan ako kapag ganyan siya tumingin dahil minsan lang siya maging seryoso.

“This is getting out of hand, Kiara,” he said and held my hand.

“What do you mean?” I asked, confusion is evident in my voice.

“Hindi mo ba naiisip ang mararamdaman ni Tita Akira kapag nalaman n’ya ang tungkol sa inyo ni Xanthos? I know what you’re trying to do, gusto mo lang naman na mabuo ulit ang pamilya n’yo pero mabubuo ba talaga ang pamilya n’yo kapag maghiwalay si Xanthos at Tita Akira? And come to think of it, ’di ba parang inaagawan mo ang sarili mong nanay?”

Natigilan ako sa tanong n’ya. I felt a sudden throb in my heart.

“Sino ba ang mas masama sa ’ming dalawa, Cad? I love my Mom but I also hate her for having an affair with someone way younger than her even though she’s still married to my Dad. Alam n’ya kasi na hindi ugali ni Dad ang magalit, alam n’ya na mabait si Dad kaya ginaganito na lang n’ya! Hindi na n’ya nirespeto ang kasal nila ni Dad at si Dad mismo. Sa tingin mo sino ang mas masama sa ’ming dalawa?! Tell me, Cad.”

Natahimik si Cad sa sinabi ko. He held my cheek and gently stroked it with his thumb.

“Okay, I’m sorry. Hmm? I understand what you’re feeling… but I want to ask you one thing, Kiara.”

I nervously looked at him. Bakit pakiramdam ko hindi ko magugustuhan ang itatanong n’ya.

“Ginagawa mo ba talaga ’to dahil gusto mong paghiwalayin si Xanthos at Tita Akira para magkabalikan ang parents mo… o baka naman ginagawa mo ’to dahil may gusto ka na kay Xanthos?”

I saw an emotion in Cad’s eyes that I couldn’t explain. Cad never looked at me this way before. There’s something in the way he looks at me right now.

“W-what the hell are you talking about?” I asked, stuttering.

“You like him already, aren’t you?” Cad asked once again.

His question is just easy to answer… I can easily ‘no’ but I don’t know why I couldn’t open my mouth to say it.

Napabuntonghininga na lang si Cad at marahang hinawi ang buhok ko habang nakatitig sa akin.

“Ayaw mo bang masaktan, Kiara?” seryosong tanong n’ya. Napakunot naman ang noo ko.

“Sino ba namang gustong masaktan?” nasabi ko na lang.

“Kung ayaw mong masaktan, h’wag mong mahalin si Xanthos. Kahit sino, pwede… pero h’wag si Xanthos.”

Chapter Twelve

“Kung wala kang magawa sa buhay mo, bumalik ka na lang sa trabaho.”

Napaismid ako sa sinabi ni Abi sa kabilang linya. Why is she being like this? I thought she wants me to take a long rest and enjoy myself away from work. This is my one of a lifetime relaxation from my exhausting work… tapos pinapabalik n’ya agad ako sa trabaho?

My Dad let me take a long rest from work. He said I can decide when I will come back. I don’t know why but I still don’t want to go back to work. Ngayon ko na lang ulit naranasan ang walang masyadong iniisip na trabaho.

…or is it because of Xanthos?

Napailing na lang ako sa naiisip ko. Ano naman ang kinalaman ng lalaking ’yon sa hindi ko pagpasok sa trabaho?

“Kapag niyayaya kita sa bar, game ka kaagad, pero kapag sa simba kita niyayaya ganyan ka?” nakaismid na tanong ko saka tiningnan ang sarili ko sa salamin.

Magsisimba ako ngayong araw. Matagal na rin akong hindi nakakapagsimba dahil palagi akong busy sa trabaho.

“I can’t even stand up, Kiara. My head hurts like hell. Next week sasama ako sa ’yo magsimba, h’wag lang ngayon dahil sobrang sama talaga ng pakiramdam ko.”

Natigilan ako nang mapansing kong iba nga talaga ang boses n’ya ngayon at mukhang sinisipon pa siya.

“Fine. Pupuntahan kita riyan sa unit mo after ko magsimba, dadalhan kita ng fruits, okay?” sabi ko na lang saka isinukbit ang sling bag ko saka lumabas ng kuwarto ko.

“Okay, I’ll wait for you. Take care,” sabi na lang ni Abi bago ibinaba ang tawag.

Nilagay ko na ang phone sa bag ko saka pinagpag ang suot kong jeans. I’m just wearing a simple blouse and jeans. I don’t know why I prefer simple clothes every time I go to church.

I was about to go to kitchen to drink water but I was taken aback when I saw Xanthos standing there while stirring something on a cup. What is he doing here?! Nakita ko siyang umalis para pumasok sa trabaho kanina.

3 pm pa lang, bakit ang aga n’yang umuwi?

Pasimple na lang akong unatras hangga’t hindi n’ya pa ako nakikita. Kahapon ko pa siya iniiwasan. I don’t know why I’m doing this… maybe I was bothered about Cad’s warning last time. But I couldn’t understand myself at all, I’m avoiding him but I don’t want to leave this house. Pwede namang umalis na lang ako rito at bumalik kay Dad pero hindi ko alam kung ano ang nagtutulak sa ’kin na manatili pa rito.

“Kiara.”

I sighed when Xanthos called me when I was about to reach the door. I took deep breath and calmed myself before facing him. Xanthos looked at me as if I did something terrible to him. I just raised my eyebrow and put my hand on my waist.

“What?” I asked in a cold tone.

I’m pissed off just by looking at him like this. I hate the fact that my heart throbs like hell just by looking at him like this. I’m sure he did something to me, I’m sure he bewitched me or what.

Hindi ko dapat nararamdaman ’to.

“Why are you avoiding me?” he asked and took a step closer to me.

“Why would I avoid you? I just have no reason to talk to you nor approach you,” I said and immediately turned my back at him.

Xanthos held my arm to stop me and pulled me closer to him. I pushed his chest and removed my arm from his grip.

“What the hell is your problem, Xanthos?!” I yelled while glaring at him.

“My problem is you because you’re avoiding me on purpose. Now it’s my turn to ask you, what the hell is your problem, Kiara?” he asked, irritation is evident in his voice.

“My problem is you because you keep on bothering me! What do you still need from me, Xanthos? We finally had sex and I stopped bothering you, but why are you being like this? Do you want to have sex with me again or what?” I asked while looking straight into his eyes. Xanthos’ jaw clenched.

Saglit siyang natahimik. Hindi ko mabasa ang iniisip n’ya ngayon dahil walang emosyon na nakatitig lang siya sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung galit ba siya o ano. Hindi ko rin alam kung bakit nakatitig lang ako sa kanya ngayon at hinihintay ang sasabihin n’ya kaysa ang umalis na lang dito.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“Church,” I answered blandly and immediately turned my back at him.

Napailing na lang ako at basta na lang lumabas ng bahay. Baka mapatitig na naman ako sa kanya hanggang sa hindi na ako makaalis.

BUTI NA lang at hindi gaanong karami ang tao sa simbahan nang makarating ako. Nagdasal muna ako saka nakinig sa sermon ng pari.

Natigilan ako nang maramdaman kong may umupo sa tabi ko. Gano’n na lang ang gulat ko nang makitang si Xanthos ’yon. He’s just wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans.

Did he follow me here?

“What are you doing here?” I asked as my eyebrow shot up.

“Nagsisimba,” tila pilosopong tanong n’ya saka tumingin na lang sa pari na nasa unahan at nagsasalita.

Nag-focus na lang din ako sa pakikinig sa pari.

“Bakit ba hindi n’yo dapat hayaang maghari ang galit sa mga puso n’yo? Dahil kapag hinayaan n’yong mangyari ’yon, maaring mas maging masama kayong tao kaysa sa nagkasala sa inyo. Normal na makaramdam tayo ng galit, it’s human nature… Pero kung hahayaan nating balutin no’n ang puso, hindi na natin makikilala ang sarili natin. Maaraing mawala ang mismong pagkatao natin,” sabi ng pari.

“Easy for him to say.”

Natigilan ako nang magsalita si Xanthos. Nagtatakang napatingin ako sa kanya.

“What do you mean?” I asked. Xanthos just looked at me and gave me a small smile.

“Nothing, he said we shouldn’t let wrath take control of our feelings. I just find it ridiculous because that doesn’t apply to every situation,” he murmured and looked at the priest again.

Nanatili akong nakatitig sa kanya. What does he mean by that? Did he experience something terrible before?

TAHIMIK KAMING nakaupo ni Xanthos sa bench na malapit sa simbahan matapos ang misa. Kanina ko pa napapansin na tahimik siya habang nakatitig sa mga batang naglalaro mula sa di kalayuan.

He seems bothered about something. Is it because of what the priest said earlier? I want to ask him but I’m hesitating. I don’t want to offend him more. What can I do to make him feel better?

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa nagtitinda ng dirty ice cream malapit sa amin. Nagkakagulo kasi ang ilang mga bata ro’n.

Tumayo na lang ako at lumapit do’n, ibibili ko na lang ng ice cream si Xanthos. Sa sobrang lalim ng iniisip n’ya, hindi n’ya yata nahalata na wala na ’ko sa tabi n’ya.

“Mga bata, si miss ganda muna,” sabi ng tindero nang makalapit na ako sa kanila. Nahihiyang ngumiti na lang ako.

“Magkano po ang ice cream sa cone?” tanong ko.

“Ten pesos lang, miss.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Ten pesos only? That’s so cheap. How is that possible?

Napatingin ako sa mga bata na naghihintay sa amin. Kumuha na lang ako ng 500-peso bill saka inabot ’yon sa tindero.

“I want two ice cream. For these kids, I’ll pay for their ice cream too. ’Yung mga bata ro’n sa gilid, pakibigyan din ng ice cream,” sabi ko saka itinuro ang mga bata na naglalaro sa gilid.

“Thank you, ate!” tuwang tuwa na sabi ng mga bata. Napangiti na lang ako saka bahagyang ginulo ang buhok nila.

I don’t like the idea of having my own family but I have a soft spot for kids and animals. Kaya madalas akong mag-donate sa mga programang sumu-suporta sa mga bata pati na rin sa mga hayop.

Ibinigay na sa ’kin ni kuyang tindero ang dalawang cookies and cream flavored ice cream. Napatingin ako sa puwesto ni Xanthos at gano’n na lang ang gulat ko nang makitang nakatingin siya sa ’kin.

Napatikhim na lang ako at muling umupo sa tabi n’ya saka inabot sa kanya ang isang ice cream. Kinuha naman n’ya iyon.

“You know what, this ice cream only costs ten pesos. How amazing is that?” I licked the ice cream. I gasped and my eyes widened in shock. “My goodness, this tastes too good for its price,” I murmured and licked the ice cream again.

I heard Xanthos chuckled beside me. He’s looking at me as if I’m an amusing kid who ate ice cream for the first time. I just rolled my eyes at him and focused on my ice cream.

“I think you’re not aware, but there’s also a five-peso ice cream,” he said and start eating his ice cream too.

“Really?! Wow,” I murmured. The cheapest ice cream I always eat before costs five hundred pesos. I guess I wasted too much money.

“Why did you buy ice cream for me?” Xanthos asked while staring at me.

“Hindi ako bumili ng ice cream para sa ’yo. Gusto ko lang tikman ang dirty ice cream, ang rude ko naman kung sarili ko lang ang bibilhan ko, ’di ba?” pagdadahilan ko na lang.

“Hmm, I though you want to comfort me with this since I looked so down earlier,” he said and gave me a small smile. I just rolled my eyes at him.

“Hindi ’no,” sabi ko na lang saka inismiran siya.

Kumain na lang kami ng ice cream. Nang maubos na ang ice cream namin, hinila ko siya papuntang tindahan para makabili kami ng tubig.

Akmang kukuha na ng pera si Xanthos sa wallet n’ya pero agad ko siyang pinigilan.

“No, I’ll pay for this,” I said and took my wallet from my sling bag.

“This seems like a date to me, I can’t let you always pay on our date,” he said put his hand inside the pocket of his pants.

“Whatever,” I murmured and paid the two bottled waters. I gave the other one to Xanthos.

Umalis na kami ng tindahang ’yon pagkatapos. Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa bilihan ng mga damit mula sa di kalayuan. Agad kong hinawakan ang kamay ni Xanthos at hinila siya papunta ro’n.

“Look, Xanthos. These wonderful clothes cost one hundred to three hundred pesos only! This is awesome,” I exclaimed and pulled him inside the small clothes store.

Maraming magagandang damit pero mura lang. I never bought clothes with three-digit price before. I don’t know why these cheap clothes amaze me.

“Look at this dress, Xanthos. Do you believe it’s only three hundred fifty pesos?” I asked and pointed the mint green dress on the mannequin.

Nakatingin lang sa ’kin si Xanthos habang ako naman ay manghang mangha sa mga murang damit. Minsan ay napapangiti siya habang nakatitig sa ’kin kaya napapaiwas na lang ako ng tingin. May kung ano na namang nag-iingay sa puso ko.

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa mga batang namamalimos sa gilid ng kalsada. Napakunot ang noo ko dahil ’yung isang bata halos wala ng damit. ’Yung iba naman ay punit punit ang damit. Bakit mas dumami yata ang mga batang namamalimos ngayon?

Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at tumingin sa tindera.

“May mga damit po kayong pambata?” tanong ko sa tindera.

“Opo, ma’am. Marami po,” sagot naman n’ya.

I took my wallet and from my sling bag and took three thousand pesos and gave it to her. Halata namang natigilan ang tindera.

“Pakibalot po ng mga damit pambata na kasya riyan sa perang ’yan,” sabi ko saka muling napatingin sa mga bata sa gilid ng kalsada.

Pagkatapos ilagay ng tindera ang mga damit sa malaking plastic agad n’ya iyong inabot sa ’kin pero natigilan ako nang kuhanin sa akin ni Xanthos iyon.

“Ako na,” tipid na sabi n’ya. Napatango na lang ako at hinayaan siya.

Hinila ko naman siya papunta sa malapit na grocery store. Namili ako ng maraming pagkain do’n, bumili na rin ako ng ilang soap at shampoo pati ng mga toothbrush. Umalis din kami agad ng grocery store pagkatapos mamili saka lumapit sa mga bata sa kalsada.

“Hi, kids!”

Napatingin sa ’kin ang mga bata. Lumapit ako sa kanila, si Xanthos naman ay wala ng nagawa kundi ang sumunod sa ’kin.

“Ito, para sa inyo.” Inabot ko sa kanila ang mga plastic ng groceries na pinamili ko. Kinuha ko rin mula kay Xanthos ang pinamili kong mga damit saka ibinigay sa kanila. Halata namang nagulat sila sa ginawa ko.

“Para sa amin po ’yan, ate?” tanong ng isang batang lalaki na sa tingin ko lagpas sampung taon ang edad.

“Oo naman. Umuwi na kayo sa inyo at dalhin n’yo ang mga ’yan sa bahay n’yo. Okay? Nasaan nga pala ang mga magulang n’yo?” tanong ko.

“May sakit po ang nanay ko,” sagot ng isang batang babae na may hawak na maliit na box na may lamang ilang barya.

My heart throbbed while looking at them. I’m so weak when it comes to these situations. I don’t romanticize poverty since everyone shouldn’t be experiencing it but seeing kids at this age work to help their parents instead of studying pains me. I just sighed and smiled at them.

“Ako po walang magulang,” sabi naman ng isang batang lalaki saka napakamot sa tiyan n’ya.

Natigilan ako nang lumapit sa kanya si Xanthos. He squatted to meet the child’s gaze and gently brushed the kid’s hair with his hand.

“You’re a strong lad,” Xanthos murmured and smiled at the kid. The kid’s forehead creased.

“Ate, ano po’ng sinabi ni kuya?” tanong ng bata sa ’kin. Natatawang napailing na lang ako.

Napatingin si Xanthos sa ibang mga bata.

“Kayo, maging mabait kayo sa mga magulang n’yo. Hmm?” sabi ni Xanthos.

“Opo!” sagot naman ng mga bata.

Napangiti na lang ako habang nakatingin kay Xanthos. It seems like he has soft spot for kids too. What a revelation.

GINABI NA kami ni Xanthos. Hindi muna kami umuwi agad at naglakad-lakad na lang sa may plaza na malapit lang din sa simbahan. Maganda maglakad-lakad dito dahil ang ganda ng mga ilaw na nanggagaling sa street lights pati na rin sa mga tindahan sa gilid ng kalsada.

Nagulat ako kay Xanthos ngayong araw dahil nangako siya sa mga bata na pag-aaralin n’ya ang mga ’yon. Hindi ko talaga inasahan na may ganitong side siya.

“Xanthos, I’ll give you one thousand points.”

Natigilan si Xanthos sa paglalakad dahil sa sinabi ko. Napakunot ang noo n’ya. Ngumiti na lang ako sa kanya saka yumakap sa braso n’ya.

“Why?” he asked while staring at me.

“Well, because you are surprisingly and unexpectedly generous and has soft spot for kids. To be honest, it turned me on,” I murmured held his hand.

Halatang natigilan siya sa ginawa ko.

“Your parents must have taught you to be a good man as you are right now,” I said and smiled at him.

Xanthos gave me a small smile and nodded.

“My mother taught me to be a perfect man.” He intertwined our fingers and kissed the back of my hand. I gasped as my cheeks heated up. I avoided his gaze and calmed my raging heart.

“W-where is she now?” I asked while still avoiding eye contact with him.

“She left me.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Agad akong napatingin sa kanya. Wala akong makitang emosyon sa mga mata n’ya pero alam kong nalulungkot siya.

“She’s an irresponsible woman who left her responsibility as a mother,” he muttered and smiled bitterly.

I don’t know what to say. I want to say something to comfort him but I don’t have the courage to do so. Baka hindi naman makatulong sa kanya ang sasabihin ko.

“But you know, I’ll give you ten points for making me go to church for the first time after 19 years. The last time I went to church was 19 years ago, with my mother. After she left us, I never went to church again,” he murmured and stroked my arm gently with his hand.

I gave him a weak smile. I sighed and hugged him. Halatang nagulat siya sa ginawa ko pero mas hinigpitan ko na lang ang yakap sa kanya.

This is the only way I know to comfort him since I have no idea what to say.

I was taken aback when Xanthos hugged me back. My heart throbbed and my pulse raced. I bit my lower lip when I felt his strong arms encircling around my waist.

“I’ll give you one million points, Kiara.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Bahagya kong itinulak ang dibdib n’ya at nagtatakang napatingin sa kanya.

“O-one million points?” I asked as my lips parted.

Xanthos nodded, he touched my cheek and stroked it gently with his thumb. He’s staring at me as if I’m the most beautiful woman in his eyes. I gulped and stared at him too, why is he looking at me like that?

“I gave you one million points because you’re beautiful,” he whispered.

“W-what? You gave me one million points just because I’m beautiful? But I’m always beautiful and that’s really shallow, Xanthos,” I said and raised my eyebrow. Xanthos smiled at me and held my chin.

Dinampian n’ya nang magaan na halik ang labi ko bago nagsalita.

“I’m not talking about your appearance, Kiara.”

Chapter Thirteen

“Xanthos, let’s just order something to eat. Baka sunugin mo pa ang bahay!” nakapamaywang na sabi ko.

Xanthos just gave me a sexy smirk and continued cooking something. I just sighed and stared at his sexy back. He’s just wearing a loose sleeveless undershirt and cotton shorts. He’s just wearing a simple pair of clothes but he still managed to look like a high-end brand model. His muscled arms covered with tattoos clenched every time he moves it.

I bit my nail while staring at him. How can someone’s back be this perfect? He’s sinfully attractive. I suddenly wanna pinch his ass cheeks.

“Xanthos.”

Natigilan siya at napalingon sa akin. I smiled sweetly at him and gave him a flying kiss. He was taken aback with I just did. I giggled when he blinked twice, as if he’s processing it in his mind.

“You’re so hot, Xanthos,” I mumbled while staring at him as if I wanna devour him whole.

“Natural na sa ’kin ’yan,” sabi n’ya saka napangisi.

Muli na siyang bumalik sa pagluluto. Tinitigan ko na lang siya habang nakaupo sa mesa. I crossed my legs and brushed my hair using my fingers. I suddenly want to seduce him again.

“It’s finally done,” anunsyo n’ya.

Nanatili akong nakatitig sa kanya habang sinasandok n’ya ang pagkain na niluto n’ya sa mangkok. Lumapit siya kaagad sa ’kin saka ipinakita sa akin ang niluto n’ya na tila ba proud na proud siya.

Well oddly, it smells good.

“Is this menudo?” I asked and pointed the food.

He just nodded and took the spoon. Hinipan n’ya muna ang menudo bago ako sinubuan. I was actually hesitant to eat it but I don’t want to offend him. I’m aware that he’s not really a good cook.

Pero kinain ko pa rin.

“So… what do you think?” he asked and gave me a small smile.

My eyes widened when I finally had a taste of his menudo. I don’t want to admit it but it tastes wondeful. This is probably the most delicious menudo I’ve tasted… Xanthos just gave me a sexy smirk when he saw my reaction.

“This is cheating, akala ko ba hindi ka masarap magluto?” nakakunot-noong tanong ko.

“This is the only food I can cook properly. My Mom taught me how to cook this before and I still remember how she cooked it and how she made her menudo delicious. My menudo is not that bad, right?” he asked.

He took a spoonful of his menudo. I gulped while staring at his luscious lips when he sexily ran his tongue there. I unconsciously bit my lower lip.

“Hmm, it tastes good,” he said and nodded.

I took a deep breath. It seems like he’s unconsciously seducing me.

“Indeed,” I muttered while staring at his lips.

Natigilan siya nang kinuha ko ang kutsara mula sa kanya. Akmang susubuin ko na ’yon pero nakaisip ako ng kalokohan at sinadya kong papatakin menudo sa legs ko. Medyo mainit pa iyon pero hindi naman sobrang nakakapaso. Napangisi ako nang bumaba ang tingin n’ya ro’n.

“Sorry, daddy… I spilled it,” I murmured seductively and ran my fingers on his hard chest.

I smirked when I saw how his sexy eyes darkened. He put the bowl on the table and took a chair. He sat in front of me and spread my legs while staring at me with his burning eyes.

“It’s okay, baby. I’ll take care of it,” he muttered in a deep and husky voice.

I gasped in shock when he ran his hot tongue on my right leg. I unconsciously gripped his hair when he ran his tongue up to the upper part of my leg, his tongue almost reached my lady part covered by thin underwear. I’m just wearing his shirt and an underwear so it’s easy for him to have access. I just took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Damn.

“X-Xanthos…”

Xanthos ripped my underwear without exerting much effort. I bit my lower lip when he suddenly attacked feminity with his hot lips without any warning.

“Fuck, Xanthos… Aahhh!”

I gripped his hair tightly as my eyes dilated. Nanghihinang napahiga ako sa mesa nang mas ibuka n’ya ang mga hita ko saka inilapit pa ang mga ’yon sa kanya.

He clung both of my legs on his broad shoulders. He teased my cl-t with the tip of his tongue. My knees instantly weakened as my moans became louder.

He’s so fast… ni hindi siya nag-aksaya ng oras.

“Xanthos! Aahhh! P-Please, fuck me more with that tongue, oohhh!”

He suddenly swirled his tongue around my swollen cl-t, as if he’s purposely avoiding it. I let out a needy moan and pulled his head closer to my pulsating wetness.

“Xanthos, s-stop torturing me… Aaahhh…”

It feels like I finally lost it when he lapped my hole with his tongue. He separated my folds and played with my cl-t using his calloused fingers while thrusting the tip of his tongue inside my hole.

I was the one who seduced him first but he’s the one who’s making me lose my mind. Damn his expert tongue and fingers!

My toes curled when he sucked my juices while still playing with my aching cl-t. My mouth agape, catching my breath.

“Fuck, X-Xanthos! Aahhh! Aaahhh, fuck. P-Please…”

His tongue was replaced by his fingers. He thrusts his two fingers inside me slowly at first. I bit the insides of my cheeks when his tongue teased my cl-t again. He lapped it with his tongue roughly. My whole body shivered as I cry because of too much sensation.

I’m about to go crazy… and I’m actually liking it.

I gasped for air when he starts thrusting his fingers inside me deeper and faster. I bit my lower lip and moved my hips against his fingers. Xanthos just held my abdomen with his other hand, as if he’s stopping me from moving.

I bit my tongue when his movements became slower. I groaned in protest. He’s obviously teasing me.

“Xanthos… S-Stop torturing me, please,” I said, almost pleading.

“Beg for me more… try harder, baby,” he muttered. My whole body shivered when I felt his hot breath on my core.

I bit my tongue when his thrusts became slower. What the hell? What does he want?

“X-Xanthos… please,” I said and tried to pull his head closer to my feminity but he refused.

Why is he torturing me like this?! What does he fucking want ba kasi?!

I bit my lower lip when I suddenly realized what he wants. Napangisi ako saka itinukod ang mga siko ko sa mesa para tingnan siya. He looked at me with his dark sexy eyes. I spread my legs wider for him and bit my lower lip.

“P-Please, daddy… Fuck me with your tongue and fingers,” I mumbled.

Xanthos’ jaw clenched and his eyes darkened with desire. He gave me a sexy smirk and thrusts his fingers faster and deeper.

“That’s not what I mean… but it’s not bad, baby,” he said and burried his head in between my legs again.

---

“FUCK, XANTHOS! YES! H-Harder, please. Fuck me more, hmm…”

Xanthos gladly obliged. He held my legs tighther and thrusts in between my legs harder. My eyes dilated when his huge length wrecked my core as he thrust. I just moaned and spread my legs wider for him.

Our sweats are mixing but I don’t care anymore. The only thing that matters to me right now is his c-ck inside my wetness. Xanthos let out a husky moan and spanked my butt cheek with his large hand.

My lips parted when he clung his calves on his shoulder while staring at me with his dark eyes. I bit my lower lip and moved my hips against his. His c-ck goes deeper because of our position and I almost lost my marbles again.

My wrists are tied up again while he’s fucking my brains out. I find it so erotic, I don’t know why I want to be tied up, spanked, and choked by him during sex. I’m so turned on right now.

“Fuck,” he muttered and thrusts deeper.

I gasped and moved my hips against his when his movements became rougher. He gently pull his length out of my feminity and slammed it hard inside me again. Halos maubusan ako ng hininga sa ginawa n’ya.

“Mine… you’re mine, baby. Don’t let any man aside from me kiss you and pleasure you like this from now on, please.” He let out a breathy moan. “If you don’t want me to kill whoever the fuck he is… Be a good girl, baby,” he mumbled while still thrusting roughly.

I just bit my lower lip… He wouldn’t kill Cadence right? Cad is his friend.

“X-Xanthos…” I clung my legs around his waist and tried to keep up with his savage movements… but he didn’t let me keep up with his roughness.

“What does my baby want? Hmm?” Xanthos asked in a rugged and sexy voice as he caressed my left leg with his rough hand.

I felt something churned inside my tummy when he called me my baby. I just avoided his hot and raking gaze and bit my lower lip. Damn him.

“X-Xanthos, I want more… Please fuck me more,” I muttered and moved my hips against his.

He gripped my hair and spanked my ass while thrusting faster. My lips parted and my eyes dilated. He’s so good, I might really lose my sanity at this rate. His hard and rough thrusts will be my death.

“Tell me if it hurts and I’ll stop,” he murmured while thrusting and gripping my hair at the same time.

“N-No, please don’t stop… Aahhh! Fuck, oohhh,” I moaned as my toes curled when he suddenly thrust his manhood deeply inside me.

I bit my lower lip and tried my best to stop myself from moaning loudly. This is too. I’ll become a sex-starved woman at this rate. He’s so good that I almost forgot my name.

I gasped when I suddenly heard a knock. Xanthos stopped thrusting for a while as his forehead creased.

“Kiara, are you there?”

My eyes widened when I realized it was Mom’s voice.

“X-Xanthos, let’s stop… Mom’s here,” I mumbled and bit my lower lip when he slowly buried his c-ck inside me again.

Xanthos didn’t listed. He raised my legs and thrust faster inside me. My eyes dilated when his manhood went deeper. I tried to pull my hips away from him savage thrusts but he just held my waist to stop me and spread my legs wider. I gasped for air when he continued thrusting as if his life depends on it.

I want to push him but my hands are tied up. I just bit my lower lip to suppress my moans.

“Kiara, are you sleeping?”

“X-Xanthos,” I mumbled softly.

“I can’t stop, baby. I’m fucking near… Ahh, fuck,” he moaned and thrust faster. I just bit my lower lip and moved my hips against his earning a deep and suppressed moan from him.

I cried weakly when I felt something building up in my belly. Xanthos cussed under his breath and started thrusting desperately… it seems like he finally lose his self control.

He crushed his lips against mine and played with my tongue inside. I moaned against his hungry kisses and responded with equal fire. I arched my body when he started fondling my breast while thrusting his tongue inside my mouth.

“Aahhh, X-Xanthos…”

My knees quivered when I finally had my release. My lips parted while he’s still thrusting roughly inside me. He pull his c-ck out and shoved it inside me again with much force. I released a breathy moan because it feels like he hit something extremely erogenous inside me.

“Kiara! I’ll open the door, are you there?”

Fuck, may susi nga pala siya ng kwartong ’to.

“Fuck,” Xanthos murmured as his c-ck grew bigger inside.

My lips parted when he released his hot and thick fluid inside me. I was shocked but I don’t know why I spread my legs wider for him, letting him release all of his cum inside me. Xanthos gripped my hair tighter while moaning sexily. He continued thrusting, but slower this time as he fill my womb with his heavy load. He closed his eyes and licked his lower lip. His jaw clenched as if he’s restraining himself from ravaging my insides with his huge manhood all over again.

“Ahh, fucking good,” he mumbled in his sexiest voice.

Damn. He just came inside me.

“U-Untie me now,” I muttered while still catching my breath.

Xanthos didn’t listen. He pulled his length out of my feminity and planted soft kisses all over my face.

Nag-init ang magkabilang pisngi ko, halos malimutan ko na ang tungkol kay Mom.

He kissed me one last time on my lips before he untied my wrists. I immediately stood up and took a shirt in my drawer and wore it. Xanthos just covered his lower body with a comforter and stared at me calmly. He doesn’t seem nervous or worried at all.

“Mamaya tayo mag-uusap, Xanthos. You fucking came inside me,” I said and threw a pillow at him.

“Sorry, I lost my mind for a second,” he said while still staring at me.

“H’wag kang lalabas ng kwartong ’to hangga’t nasa labas si Mom. Naiintindihan mo?” tanong ko saka pinaningkitan siya ng mga mata.

Magsasalita pa sana siya pero agad ko siyang tinalikuran. Lumabas agad ko ng kwarto at sinara ang pinto.

“Hey, Kiara!”

Napatingin ako kay Mom na naglalakad na papalapit sa ’kin. I bit my lower lip when I saw her holding a key. I gulped and tried to calm myself.

Parang ngayon ko lang naramdaman ang kaba.

“Kanina pa ako katok nang katok, bakit ngayon ka lang nagbukas ng pinto?” tanong ni Mom.

“Ahm, I-I was sleeping. By the way, w-welcome home.”

I wanna punch myself when I stuttered. Damn, my knees are still shaking because of that mind-blowing sex and now I’m in front of my Mom right after that extreme orgasm. Damn, my body feels weak all over.

“Thank you, sweetie. By the way, where’s Xanthos?” she asked.

I bit my lower lip and scratched my eyebrow.

“I-I don’t know, it’s not my duty to look after him,” I said and laughed awkwardly.

Mom sighed and avoided my gaze.

“Xanthos is acting weird. He suddenly broke up with me last night through phone call that’s why I immediately rushed here from my business trip,” Mom mumbled.

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Did Xanthos really broke up with her? Bakit hindi man lang sinabi sa akin ni Xanthos?

“Ahh, k-kaya pala hindi masyadong nauwi si Xanthos dito. I don’t know what’s his problem, Mom. We’re not that close. Ahm, by the way, I still want to sleep. Let’s just talk later,” I said and smiled awkwardly at her.

“Oh, okay. Pupunta lang ako sa office saglit. Sige, matulog ka na ulit.”

Pagkasabi no’n, tumalikod na rin agad si Mom at umalis. Tila nakahinga naman ako nang maluwag at muling pumasok sa kwarto ko.

Naabutan ko si Xanthos na nakaupo sa kama habang nakatingin sa akin. He’s now wearing his boxer shorts. His hair’s messy but it just made him look hotter.

“What the hell is happening, Xanthos? Why did you break up with my Mom? And wait, let’s also talk about what you did earlier.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

Xanthos brushed his hair using his hand and closed his eyes. I bit my lower lip because he’s so beautiful right now. Baka malimutan ko pa ang inis ko sa kanya ng wala sa oras.

“This is what you want, right? I broke up with your Mom,” he said as if it was just nothing.

My forehead creased. “Why are you doing this? Are you playing with me or what?”

“My relationship with your Mom is purely for our both gains only. Ginamit n’ya ’ko para makawala sa tatay mo.” He opened his eyes and stared at me. “I used her because she promised she’ll sell me her shares in North Technologies Corp. that I desperately need… Falling in love is not included in our agreement… but she just confessed that she fell in love with me. That’s why I broke up with her.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Tila hindi nagproseso agad sa isip ko ang mga ’yon.

“So… are you telling me that you and my Mom weren’t in a relationship in the first place? B-But why did you act like you really love her? You even tried to follow her on her business trip?” I asked in confusion.

“Well, nothing… just to make it kinda realistic, and besides, you’re also not part of our agreement. I tried my best to resist you and your advances but damn, I lost. You’re truly irresistible.” He let out a sexy chuckle.

I bit my lower lip and avoided his raking gaze.

Damn this man.

---

“Wow, what a fucking plot twist!”

Napailing na lang ako sa sinabi ni Cadence sa kabilang linya.

“Hindi mo ba talaga alam ang tungkol do’n? Diba magkaibigan kayo ni Xanthos?” tanong ko.

“Hindi kami sobrang close ni Xanthos. Ang lakas kaya ng sapak no’n,” sabi na lang ni Cadence.

I rolled my eyes and took my car key.

“Ano ng plano n’yo ni Xanthos ngayon? Kayo naman ang magjowa?” tanong pa ni Cadence.

“Of course not. I will never initiate that topic to him. I’ll just… wait for him to talk about it,” I mumbled.

I took my sling bag before I stormed out of my room. Sinabi ko kay Xanthos kagabi na kung makikipaghiwalay siya kay Mom, gawin n’ya nang maayos kahit pa hindi totoo ang relasyon nila.

Natigilan ako sa naabutan ko nang magtungo ako sa living room. Agad na nanghina ang mga tuhod ko nang makitang nakayakap si Mom sa baywang ni Xanthos habang si Xanthos naman ay nakayakap din kay Mom.

Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit parang nanikip ang dibdib ko sa nakita. Napalunok ako at napahawak nang mahigpit sa phone ko.

“Kiara, hey, still there?” Cadence asked on the other line.

Napatingin si Xanthos sa direksyon ko. His jaw clenched while Mom’s face is buried on his chest. I just avoided his gaze and tried to calm my heart.

Mabigat ang pakiramdam na nilagpasan ko sila at agad na lumabas ng bahay. Nanginginig ang mga kamay na binuksan ko ang gate saka agad na sumakay ng kotse ko. Nanatili akong nasa loob ng sasakyan at hindi iyon pinapaandar.

I’m hoping that Xanthos will come out and follow me. I just laughed bitterly and bit my lower lip.

Fake relationship my ass. Damn him.

“Hoy, Kiarabog! Tangina kanina pa ’ko salita nang salita rito ha. Para na ’kong timang.”

Tila doon ko lang napagtanto na kausap ko pala si Cadence sa phone.

“C-Cad, where are you? Pupuntahan kita,” sabi ko na lang saka agad na pinaharurot ang sasakyan.

Chapter Fourteen

“Mukha ba akong takbuhan ng mga brokenhearted?”

I glared at Cadence and threw a pillow at him when I heard a nonsensical complain from him. I hugged another pillow and buried my face there.

“Totoo naman, e. Nu’ng brokenhearted si Abi sa akin din nag-rant at umiyak. Nakakasawa na rin kaya maging crying shoulder. I don’t deserve this! I deserve better, I deserve you. Yiee–aray! Tangina, pangit mo talaga ka-bonding. Cancelled ka na,” reklamo n’ya nang muli ko siyang batuhin ng unan.

I just stayed quiet and stared at the ceiling. I sighed and closed my eyes. My heart still feels heavy until now. I’m obviously jealous… but why the hell would I be jealous? I rarely feel jealousy, but right now, I easily got jealous of my own mother. I can’t forgive Xanthos for making me feel like this. He’s the only man who made me feel like this and I hate it!

“Kanina pa natunog ’yang phone mo. Baka si Xanthos ’yan,” sabi ni Cad saka itinuro ang phone ko na nakapatong lang sa kama.

“So?” I asked and raised my eyebrow.

“Aw ’no, kunwari strong pero marupok naman,” bulong ni Cadence na narinig ko naman.

Natahimik na lang ako sa sinabi n’ya. Wala ako sa mood makipaglokohan kay Cadence. Gusto ko lang talaga ng may kasama ngayon. Kung nakapag-isip pa ako nang ayos baka si Abi ang pinuntahan ko at hindi siya.

“Baka naman kino-comfort lang ni Xanthos ’yung Mommy mo. Diba nga sabi mo bigla na lang nakipag-break si Xanthos? Kahit naman kunwarian lang kuno ’yon, malay mo na-fall talaga si Tita Akira at nasaktan pero ikaw talaga ang legit, true, tunay, at totoong gusto ni pareng Xanthos.” Napakamot si Cad sa kilay n’ya. “Oh, ’di ba? Grabe ’yung theory ko, ’no? Pwede na ’ko maging author sa wattpad. Ang ilalagay kong title, ‘Nanay ko, karibal ko’ shet. Magiging best selling book of the history ’yon, masisira career ni JK Rowling.”

I let out a heavy sigh and stared at my phone. Sa totoo lang, nangangati na akong tingnan ang cellphone ko. Pero ayoko namang ipakita kay Cad na marupok ako.

“Kiarabog, magjowa na ba kayo ni Xanthos?” tanong ni Cad.

My forehead creased with his question.

“Not yet… I mean, no. Why?” My eyebrow shot up.

Cadence smirked and held my arm. I gasped in shock when he suddenly pulled me closer to him and made me sit on his lap without exerting much effort.

“W-What the fuck are you doing?” I asked, stammering.

He took his phone and took a picture of us. I was taken aback when he suddenly kissed my neck and took another picture. I tried to push him but he just held my back and pulled me closer to him.

Tila nakahinga na ako nang maluwag nang ilayo na n’ya ulit ang mukha sa leeg ko.

“Now, let me see,” he murmured and looked at his phone. Napatingin din ako ro’n.

Napasinghap ako nang makitang kinuhanan n’ya ng picture ang hitsura namin kanina. Akmang kukuhanin ko ang cellphone mula sa kanya pero agad n’yang nilagay ’yon sa likuran n’ya.

“Send natin ’to kay Xanthos. Kapag nagselos siya, ibig sabihin tama ’yung theory ko. Ano? Game?” nakangising tanong n’ya.

“Ano naman sa tingin mo ang gagawin n’ya sa ’yo kung magseselos talaga siya?” nakakunot-noong tanong ko.

“Ah, good question. I bet he’ll kill me for real this time. Knowing him, kahit mata ko magkakaroon ng latay,” nakangiwing sabi n’ya.

I bit my lower lip and took a deep breath. I shook my head and scratched my nape.

“Don’t send those pictures to him. Paano kung hindi naman siya magselos at isipin n’ya na masyado akong papansin,” bulong ko saka napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya.

“Tanga, kunwari wrong send lang. Sige na, tingnan lang natin magiging reaksyon n’ya. Pero nga pala, kung sakaling may mangyayaring masama sa ’kin pagkatapos nito, sa ’yo na ’yung bar ko. Saka paki-donate na lang ng lahat ng kayaman ko sa mga charity, salamat,” sabi n’ya at pinagdikit pa ang dalawang palad.

Napairap na lang ako at muling sinubukang kuhanin sa kanya ang cellphone pero nagmatigas siya.

“Send ko na ha. H’wag kang mag-alala dahil magseselos talaga ’yon. Tingnan mo naman, ang hot natin sa picture,” nakangising sabi ni Cad saka muling tiningnan ang phone n’ya.

Napairap na lang ako at umalis sa kandungan n’ya. I sat beside him and hugged his pillow. I closed my eyes and let out a heavy sigh. I can’t take Xanthos off my mind. How dare he play with me like that?

Sabi na nga ba, hindi dapat ako nagtiwala sa mga pinagsasabi n’ya. Kung tutuusin hindi ko pa naman siya gano’ng kilala. I just unknowingly fell for his trap. I’m ashamed of myself. Why did I become like this?

“Woah, na-seen n’ya na.”

Agad kong naidilat ang mga mata ko sa sinabi ni Cadence. Agad akong tumingin sa cellphone n’ya at gano’n na lang ang gulat ko nang makitang ni-send n’ya nga kay Xanthos ang pictures namin kanina.

“What the fuck, Cad?!” I asked in shock. Cadence just chuckled and pinched my cheek.

“Trust me on this one, Kiara. I know what I’m doing,” he said and gave me a playful grin.

I just rolled my eyes and shrugged. Yeah, right. I shouldn’t give a fuck anyway. Ano naman kung nakita ni Xanthos? Wala akong pakialam sa reaksyon n’ya o sa iisipin n’ya.

“Ano kayang iniisip ni gago? Bakit hindi nag-reply?” bulong ni Cadence habang nakatitig sa cellphone n’ya.

I snatched his phone away from him and put it on the bedside table. I glared at him and threw anothet pillow.

“Wala ka sigurong magawa sa buhay kaya pinagti-trip-an mo ako?” nakapamaywang na tanong ko.

“Ay grabe ka naman po, ate girl. Hindi ba pwedeng concerned lang talaga ako sa ’yo at tine-test ko kung seryoso ba talaga sa ’yo si mareng Xanthos? Ayaw mo bang gawin ko ’yon?” Napabuntonghininga si Cad. “Sorry ha, eto lang kasi ako, e. Sensya na, hindi mo ’ko pwede ipagmalaki. Ayaw talaga sa ’kin ng mundo. Life is so unfair. Sensya na, ako lang kasi ’to, walang kwenta. I’m just a simple person lang kasi, low-key. I’m just nobody. Sorry kasi–aray naman, Kiara!” reklamo n’ya nang sipain ko ang tagiliran n’ya.

Kung ano-ano na namang pinagsasasabi n’ya.

“Just shut up, Cad! Nag-iisip ako!” naiinis na sabi ko saka muling yumakap sa unan n’ya.

“Make out tayo para makapag-isip ka nang ayos saka—de joke lang. Grabe ka na talaga, ate girl. Hindi ka mabiro,” agad na sabi n’ya nang tingnan ko siya nang masama.

Natigilan lang kami nang marinig ang pagtunog ng doorbell ni Cad. Mahina kong sinipa ang binti ni Cadence para patayuin siya.

“Tingnan mo kung sino ’yon,” utos ko sa kanya.

“Boss ka ba?” tanong naman ni Cad.

I glared at him and was about to throw another pillow at him but he immediately stood up.

“Ito na nga po, boss Kiara,” sabi na lang ni Cad saka lumabas ng kwarto n’ya

Napabuntonghininga ako at muling pumikit. Mukhang dito muna ako matutulog ngayong gabi. Wala na rin naman akong lakas na umalis. I’ll be staying here for tonight muna. Bukas kay Abi na lang ako pupunta.

I frozed when I heard a strange noise from Cad’s living room. What the hell was that? Was that a gunshot or what?!

I immediately stood up and stormed out of his room. My lips parted when I saw Xanthos pointing a gun at Cad who’s hiding under the table. My eyes widened in shock. Xanthos has a gun… what the hell is he doing?!

“Dude, k-kalma ka naman muna. Kapag napatay mo ’ko mawawalan ka ng poging kaibiga–ay puta! Saglit lang naman! Let me explain, pare!” hiyaw ni Cad nang paputukin ni Xanthos ang baril sa sahig malapit sa paa ni Cad.

“Xanthos! What the fuck is your problem?!”

Hindi ko na napigilang sumigaw. Napatingin naman sa ’kin si Xanthos kasabay ng pagkunot ng noo n’ya. Agad siyang lumapit sa ’kin ag hinila ako palapit sa kanya.

“If you don’t want me to kill that asshole, come with me,” Xanthos muttered while staring at me.

Napatingin ako kay Cad. Lumabas na siya sa ilalim ng mesa na pinagtataguan n’ya. Napangisi siya saka inayos ang buhok n’yang nagulo.

“Pareng Xanthos, intindihin mo ’ko. Concerned friend lang ako ni Kiara. Saka dapat stick to one ka lang, mare. Hindi pwede na dalawa silang kini-keep mo. H’wag gano’n, mare. Gentleman tayo, e. Hindi tayo gago,” nakangising sabi ni Cad.

Xanthos glared and pointed his gun at him again. Hinawakan ko ang braso n’ya upang pigilan siya pero hindi siya natinag.

“Since you’re my friend just like you said… I will kill you quickly without torturing you. Consider yourself lucky.” Kinasa ni Xanthos ang baril n’ya.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ako kinakabahan. Malakas ang pakiramdam ko na hindi talaga babarilin ni Xanthos si Cad. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at muling humawak sa braso ni Xanthos.

“Kapag pinaputok mo ulit ’yang baril mo, magagalit talaga ako.”

Halatang natigilan si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. Napabuntonghininga siya at itinago na lang ang baril sa bulsa ng coat n’ya. Napasinghap na lang ako nang bigla ako nitong buhatin na parang sako.

“W-What the fuck are you up to?!” I asked, stammering.

“I’ll kidnap you,” he mumbled.

My eyes widened as my lips parted. He can’t be serious.

“Hindi ako papayag pareng Xanthos. Dadaan ka muna kay Cadence Lettiere bago mo ma-kidnap si Kiara–” Naputol ang sasabihin ni Cadence. “–joke lang, boss. Sige, dalhin mo na si Kiara. Gusto naman talaga n’yan sumama sa ’yo, e. Pabebe lang ’yan. Sige, good luck. Fighting!” agad na sabi ni Cad.

Napasinghap ako sa sinabi n’ya. Hindi ko nakikita ang mukha ni Cadence ngayon dahil likod lang ni Xanthos ang nakikita ko pero gusto ko ng sapakin ang mukha n’ya ngayon.

“Cad, how dare you?! You worthless piece of–”

Hindi ko na naituloy ang sasabihin ko dahil agad ng tinalikuran ni Xanthos si Cad at lumabas ng unit nito habang buhat pa rin ako. Napabuga ako ng hangin at sinuntok ang likod ni Xanthos pero hindi siya natinag at tuloy pa rin sa paglalakad.

“Xanthos! Put me down! Ang sakit sa ulo!” I held my temple and gently massaged it.

I was taken aback when Xanthos put me down. I blinked and stared at him. He gave me gentle kiss on my forehead and carried me again… in a bridal style carry this time. I gasped and clung on his nape for support.

“Y-You don’t have to carry me! I can walk.”

Hindi pinansin ni Xanthos ang sinabi ko at tumuloy lang sa paglalakad hanggang sa makarating kami sa elevator.

My face went crimson red when other people in the elevator looked at us. I heard a group of girls giggling. I bit my lower lip and hide my face on Xanthos’ chest. I will kill him later. I will kill him for embarrassing the hell out of me!

“Ang sweet nila, ’no? Sana all.”

“Ang pogi ni kuya. Swerte ni ate.”

“Bagong kasal yata sila. Nakakakilig naman.”

Lalong nag-init ang mukha ko nang marinig ang bulungan nila. Napakapit ako nang mahigpit sa coat ni Xanthos dahil sa kahihiyan.

Tahimik pa rin ako hanggang sa makarating kami sa kotse n’ya. I don’t know why I’m just letting him take me, I don’t know why I’m not protesting. I bet he’s using some kind of magic to control me… or maybe I was just out of my mind.

I just looked at the window. Xanthos also remained quiet while driving. Nagpatuloy ang biyahe hanggang sa makarating kami sa village or subdivision na hindi gaanong pamilyar sa akin. Pero mukhang mayayaman din ang mga nakatira dito.

Itinigil n’ya ang kotse sa tapat ng mataas na gate. Kusang bumukas ’yon at agad naman n’yang pinaandar ang kotse papasok.

Lumabas si Xanthos ng kotse. Hindi ko na hinintay na pagbuksan n’ya ako at agad na ring bumaba. Muling lumapit sa akin si Xanthos at binuhat ako.

“Where are we?” I asked. I just clung on his nape for support.

“My place,” Xanthos answered.

It seems like we’re in his bachelor’s pad. It’s a two-storey glass-walled bachelor’s pad with a rectangular pool. His place is spacious, I don’t even know if I still have to call it a bachelor’s pad because this place already looks like a mansion. The color theme of his house are black and gray. Unang tingin pa lang malalaman na agad na lalaki ang makatira dito.

Napatingin ako sa paligid ng bahay n’ya nang makapasok kami. Hindi ko maiwasang mamangha dahil mostly, sa glass wall gawa ang bahay n’ya. Nasa second floor ang kwarto dahil narito na sa first floor ang kusina at living room, may mini gym din.

Nasa iisang parte lang kami ng bahay pero makikita na ang kabuuan ng bahay n’ya maski sa second floor. Masasabi ko na magaling ang architect na nag-design ng bahay n’ya.

Pinaupo ako ni Xanthos sa table. Akmang itutulak ko siya pero agad n’yang iniharang ang mga braso sa magkabilang gilid ko. Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya dahil masyadong malapit ang mukha n’ya.

“W-What the fuck do you want?” I asked and tried to push him again but he just leaned closer to me.

I bit the insides of my cheeks when I suddenly inhaled his manly scent. My knees weakened and I unconsciously held his broad shoulder for support.

“I’m sorry.”

Nagtatakang napatingin ako sa kanya. Hinila n’ya ang isang upuan saka umupo ro’n. Natigilan na lang ako nang hawakan n’ya ako sa baywang at walang kahirap-hirap na pinaupo ako sa kandungan n’ya.

“Bakit ka nagso-sorry?” nakakunot-noong tanong ko.

“I’m sorry because I made you jealous. There’s really nothing going on between us. I don’t have any romantic affiliation with her and she knows that. I just felt bad because she fell in love with me for real. I’m sorry, Kiara. That won’t happen again,” he explained while staring at me.

“Why do you have to say sorry? We’re not in a relationship anyway,” I mumbled and turned my gaze away from him.

Xanthos held my chin and made me face him. I gasped when he suddenly gave me a soft kiss on my lips.

“I know that but even so, we have mutual feelings, right? It’s not clear or official but we have feelings for each other. Even though our relationship isn’t clear yet, you have all the right to get jealous and I have to apologize for making you feel that way.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya at napakurap. Seryoso ang mga mata n’ya na nakatitig sa ’kin. Lalong nanghina ang mga tuhod ko at nag-init ang magkabilang pisngi ko. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko at pilit na pinakalma ang paghinga ko.

My heart is beating crazily right now. I don’t know why I can’t take my eyes off him. How can he be so honest and straightforward about his feelings? I’ve been denying what I feel for him because I know there’s no assurance.

“T-This is awkward, Xanthos. I just seduced you to get the fuck out of my Mom’s life. We can’t be together for real. That will be really awkward, especially for Mom… and if she really fell in love with you… that will be a problem,” I muttered in a soft voice.

Natigilan na lang ako nang pagdikitin ni Xanthos ang noo namin. Pumikit siya saka mas hinila ako palapit sa kanya.

“Let’s not talk about that now. I need to rest first. Those pictures that Cadence sent to me drained my energy,” he murmured and buried his face on my neck.

“Those pictures are nothing. Pinagti-trip-an ka lang ni Cad,” sabi ko na lang.

Nag-explain siya sa akin ng side n’ya, kaya siguro dapat din akong mag-explain.

Hindi nagsalita si Xanthos at hinigpitan na lang ang yakap sa ’kin. Marahan ko namang hinaplos ang buhok n’ya… mukhang pagod nga talaga siya.

Natigilan ako nang alisin ni Xanthos ang mukha sa leeg ko saka tumitig sa akin.

“Your presence feels home,” he mumbled and gently caressed my cheek.

Hindi na naman ako nakapagsalita sa sinabi n’ya. His simple words can destroy all of my defenses… this is not good.

NAGISING AKO NANG maramdaman na wala si Xanthos sa tabi ko. Bumangon ako at kinusot ang mga mata ko. Napatingin ako sa cellphone ko na nakalapag sa bedside table. Agad kong kinuha ’yon at tiningnan kung may text.

My forehead creased when I saw a message from Dad.

Dad: Kiara, when will you come back? The company is not in good situation right now. I need your help, but I’m not forcing you.

I sighed and massaged my nape. I almost forgot my job because of Xanthos. Mukhang kailangan ko ng bumalik sa trabaho. I can’t let my Dad be stressed out alone.

Ano kayang problema ng kompanya? Mukhang seryoso ang problemang ’yon dahil nag-text na talaga si Dad para pabalikin ako.

Napailing na lang ako at hinanap si Xanthos. Tumayo ako at inayos ang t-shirt ni Xanthos na suot ko ngayon. Lumabas ako ng kwarto at agad na nagtungo sa first floor para hanapin siya. Napakunot na lang ang noo ko nang makitang wala rin siya ro’n.

Lumabas ako ng bahay at doon ko na siya nakita. He’s sitting at the chair near the pool with a glass of liquor in his hand. He took a sip while staring at the dark sky.

Hindi gano’ng kalayo ang pwesto ko sa kanya pero mukhang hindi n’ya ako napansin. Tahimik na nakatitig lang ako sa kanya at hinayaan siyang mapag-isa.

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa mukha n’ya.

“X-Xanthos,” I mumbled when I saw his eyes.

His eyes… they look so empty and sad. His eyes are probably the loneliest eyes that I’ve ever seen. He’s staring at the sky full of stars with a hint of sorrow and melancholy.

It feels like this is his real emotion. He looks miserable, he seems lonely, and his eyes are full of pain.

My heart throbbed while staring at him. Hindi ko alam kung bakit bumigat ang pakiramdam ko habang nakatingin sa malungkot n’yang mga mata na nakatingin sa langit.

For some unknown reason, my vision became blurry because of tears forming in my eyes… seeing him like this, seeing his true feelings… makes me sad too.

Bakit? Bakit sobrang lungkot ng mga mata n’ya?

Chapter Fifteen

“You’ve been staring at me as if your world revolves around me, Kiara.”

Hindi ako nag-react sa sinabi ni Xanthos at nanatiling nakatitig sa kanya habang nakatutok siya sa laptop n’ya.

“Is there a problem?” he asked and closed his laptop. He removed his eyeglasses and faced me.

I sighed and hugged him. I nuzzled my face on his neck that made him let out a soft but manly chuckle. He smells good, it makes me feel comfortable for some unknown reason.

“I’ll come back to work starting tomorrow, Dad needs me,” I mumbled.

Xanthos went silent for a while. He hugged me back and kissed my forehead. I smiled and hugged him tighter, I don’t want to let him go. I can hug him like this forever. I don’t know why I’m acting like this towards him. I don’t know why I’m acting like a clingy and immature girlfriend.

“You’re still here with me but you miss me already? You’re kinda scary, Kiara,” he said and let out a manly laugh. I smacked his muscled arm.

“I’m serious, Xanthos. Magiging busy ulit ako. Hindi mo alam kung gaano ako ka-workaholic,” sabi ko saka tinaasan siya ng kilay.

“What are you implying?” he asked while staring at me.

Hindi agad ako nakasagot. Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya dahil naramdaman kong nag-iinit ang magkabilang pisngi ko. Agad namang hinawakan ni Xanthos ang pisngi ko at pinaharap ako sa kanya.

“Kiara, is there a problem?” he asked and gently caressed my left cheek with his thumb.

“We won’t see each other that much,” I mumbled and averted his raking gaze.

Xanthos chuckled again and pinched both of my cheeks. I glared at him and punched his chest but it didn’t bother him. Xanthos gave me a soft kiss on my lips and smiled at me. He looks like a cute soft boy every time he smiles like that. Bago pa kami dumating sa ganitong punto, naririnig ko na ang mga usapin tungkol kay Xanthos. Most people says he’s a cold-hearted businessman who doesn’t feel sympathy nor compassion to anyone. He only cares about his own gain and easily disposes people he doesn’t need.

I don’t believe those rumors now though. I know he’s not like that.

“You don’t have to worry about that,” he said and while planting soft kisses all over my face.

“Hmm?” I asked, confused.Xanthc

“I will always visit you in your office. I’ll help your father with his problem regarding NTC, so I’ll be there more often. Okay ba ’yon?” he asked in a soft voice and kissed me on my lips.

I just sighed and nodded.

“Why is my baby still sad? Hmm?” he asked and cupped my face gently.

I held his large and calloused hand and intertwined our fingers. Xanthos looked at our hands and then looked at me again. He seemed confused with my actions, well, so do I. I don’t know why I’m like this. I just want to be with him and cling with him as much as possible ever since I saw his sad eyes that night.

Pakiramdam ko ang dami n’yang tinatago sa ’kin.

“Xanthos,” I muttered and caressed his cheek.

“Hmm?” he asked in a soft voice.

“Ahm, is it too much to ask for if I want you to be honest with me?” I asked and caressed his hand with my thumb.

“No, it’s not. Why? Do you think I’m not honest with you right now?” he asked in a teasing voice.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko at napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya. Mas lalo akong nahiya, baka isipin n’ya masyado akong nagde-demand kahit wala naman kaming relasyon.

“T-That’s not what I mean,” I mumbled.

“I want to have sex with you right now.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi ni Xanthos at gulat na napatingin sa kanya. Napangisi naman siya sa naging reaksyon ko.

“What the hell are you saying, fucker?!” I growled in an angry voice. Xanthos just let out a manly laugh.

“You said you want me to be honest,” tila pa-inosenteng sabi n’ya.

“Hindi ganyan!” naiinis na sabi ko saka sinuntok siya sa dibdib. Tinawanan n’ya lang naman ako.

“Ah, what a drastic change. You were like a cute puppy earlier,” he said and hugged me.

“H-Hindi kasi ’yon ang ibig kong sabihin. What I mean is… I want you to express your true feelings. I-If your sad, show it to me and don’t try to conceal it with a smile. Do you get what I’m saying, Xanthos? I-I mean, if it’s not too much to ask for,” I muttered and then averted his gaze.

Saglit na natahimik si Xanthos. Napatikhim ako at inalis ang pagkakahawak n’ya sa kamay ko dahil baka maramdaman n’yang nanlalamig iyon. Hindi na lang ako tumingin sa kanya at kumuha ng isang unan saka niyakap ’yon.

I can smell his scent on his pillow, so comfy.

Xanthos cupped my cheeks and made me face him. He looks serious now. I just gulped and tried my best to avoid his gaze but he’s persistent. I sighed and just looked at his handsome face.

“Well, that’s honestly too much to ask for,” he said and gave me a small smile.

Napasinghap ako sa sinabi n’ya at agad na inalis ang pagkakahawak n’ya sa pisngi ko. Mahina siyang natawa nang irapan ko siya saka dumistansya nang kaunti sa kanya. Agad naman n’yang hinawakan ang baywang ko at muli akong hinila palapit sa kanya saka pinaupo ako sa kandungan n’ya.

“Paano ba ’yan? I will only show my true feelings to you if you’re my girlfriend,” he said and kissed my hand.

Naningkit ang mga mata ko sa sinabi n’ya.

“Sinuswerte ka ba?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ko.

“Should I court you first then?” he asked and held his chin.

“Of course, I don’t settle for less,” I smirked.

“Hmm.” Muli siyang napahawak sa baba n’ya na tila nag-iisip. Natigilan ako sa naging reaksyon n’ya.

“Hey, I’m just kidding. You don’t have to do that if you don’t want to,” natatawang sabi ko saka pabirong hinampas ang braso n’ya.

Well, I’ll be lying if I will say that I’m not disappointed, but what can I do? I shouldn’t force him force him again just like I did when I seduced him. Medyo nakakapagsisi na ginawa ko ’yon, pero kung hindi ko ginawa ’yon, wala kami sa ganitong sitwasyon ngayon.

“Well, I honestly want to marry you right now, but I think you’re kinda traditional, huh. If that’s the case, I’ll court you first,” he muttered and kissed my cheek gently.

Nag-init ang magkabilang pisngi ko sa sinabi n’ya pati na sa magaan na paghalik n’ya sa pisngi ko. I feel special and treasured. I guess Xanthos will be a good lover. How can I not like someone like him?

“Just to inform you, I’ll definitely give you a hard time, Mr. Archante. I will never forget how you hooked up with my mother.” My eyes narrowed.

“Hey, hook up is not a good term, baby. It’s just a business-related relationship. No romantic nor sexual relationship involved,” he said, defending himself.

“Don’t baby me!” I rolled my eyes.

“Why, baby?” he asked in a teasing voice.

Muling nag-init ang pisngi ko. Kinikilig ako sa tuwing tinatawag n’ya ako sa endearment na ’yan, pero ayaw kong ipahalata. Baka isipin n’ya na masyado ko siyang gusto. Hindi ako papayag na ako lang ang kinikilig nang ganito sa aming dalawa.

Natigilan ako nang may pumasok na ideya sa isip ko. Napangisi na lang ako saka napahawak sa ibabang labi ko. Nagtatakang napatingin naman sa akin si Xanthos.

“Hmm…” I ran my fingers on his hard chest.

“Are you calling me baby because you’re my daddy?” I asked in my seductive voice.

Xanthos’ mouth agape. I smirked and clung my arms around his nape.

“Am I right, daddy?” I asked in a hoarse voice.

Inilapit ko ang mukha ko sa leeg n’ya saka marahang inilapat ang labi ko ro’n. Muli akong napangisi nang maramdaman kong natigilan siya.

“You better stop this, Kiara. I said I’ll court you,” he muttered and tried to push me away from him.

“You teased me first, daddy,” I said and glared at him.

“Stop calling me that. Baka magselos ang totoong daddy mo,” natatawang sabi n’ya saka dinampian ng halik ang labi ko.

“But you like it every time I call you daddy while we’re having sex,” I mumbled and chuckled sexily.

“Hindi kaya,” pagtanggi n’ya.

Napahagalpak ako ng tawa sa sinabi n’ya. Para siyang bata nu’ng sinabi n’ya ’yon. It seems like he really has a cute side.

“Totoo kaya! H’wag kang liar ha.” Pinaningkitan ko siya ng mga mata.

Natawa siya sa sinabi ko. Napasimangot na lang ako at hinampas siya sa dibdib.

“Prove it to me then.” He grinned and buried his face on my neck.

“Let’s have sex,” I mumbled and grind my hips against his.

Xanthos let out a manly and sexy moan. He gripped my waist tighter as if he’s telling me to move my hips more.

Napangisi na lang ako at mas pinag-igihan ang ginagawa ngunit natigilan na lang ako nang agad akong inihiga ni Xanthos sa kama at pumaibabaw sa ’kin. Natawa ako sa ginawa n’ya.

“Akala ko ba manliligaw ka muna?” natatawang tanong ko.

“Fuck it, I’ll just court you tomorrow. For now…” He removed his shirt revealing his sexy body. “…I’ll punish my baby for teasing his daddy.”

---

“Welcome back, Ma’am Kiara,” the employees greeted me.

“Good morning, everyone,” nakangiting bati ko rin.

Sa totoo lang tinatamad pa ’kong bumalik sa trabaho pero wala naman akong magagawa. Kailangan ni Dad ng tulong ko. Dumiretso muna ako sa office n’ya bago ako magtungo sa office ko. I missed him. Nawala sa isip ko ang bisitahin siya dahil kay Xanthos. Sana hindi nagtatampo si Dad sa ’kin ngayon.

Naabutan ko si Dad na nakatutok sa laptop pagpasok ko sa office n’ya. Mukhang busy talaga siya dahil halos hindi n’ya napansin na pumasok ako.

“Dad, good morning.”

Dad stopped typing on his laptop and looked at me. Agad siyang napangiti at tumayo saka lumapit sa ’kin. Niyakap ako ni Dad, gumanti naman ako nang mas mahigpit na yakap sa kanya.

“I missed you, Dad,” I mumbled and hugged him tighter.

“I doubt that, Kiara Amaris. You didn’t visit me,” tila nagtatampong sabi ni Dad saka kumalas sa pagkakayakap sa ’kin.

“Sorry, Dad. May kinailangan lang ako asikasuhin, babawi ako sa ’yo, promise.” Itinaas ko pa ang kanang kamay ko.

Natawa siya sa sinabi ko saka bahagyang ginulo ang buhok ko.

“I’m just kidding. I know you have something you want to prioritize now and it’s okay. I’m sorry for making you come back here just because everything’s kinda messed up. You can quit working here once everything is okay. I don’t want to pressure you on something you don’t want,” Dad said and caressed my hair.

“What are you saying, Dad? You don’t have to say sorry for this. I’m very much willing to help you in any ways I can.” I hugged him again.

“My daughter is the best. What did I do in my past life to have a daughter like you?” Dad chuckled and kissed the top of my head.

“Dad, I know how much you value our company but please take care of your health too. Napansin ko na pumayat ka,” nag-aalalang sabi ko habang nakayakap pa rin sa kanya.

“Oh, sorry for making you worry, dear. I’ll take a rest once this crisis is done. I promise,” he said and tapped my back.

Mukkhang hindi talaga maganda ang lagay ng kompanya. Ngayon ko lang nakita si Dad na na-stress nang ganito. Hindi ko alam kung anong nangyayari, ayaw ko rin naman magtanong kay Dad dahil ayaw kong ito ang pag-usapan namin ngayon. Magtatanong na lang ako sa mga empleyado.

Gaya ng inaasahan ko, agad akong sinalubong ng secretary ko pagpasok ko sa opisina. Napabuntonghininga ako at umupo sa swivel chair saka nilapag ang handbag ko sa table.

“Ma’am Kiara, I don’t want to burden you with a lot of paper works as soon as you came back but…” My secretary scratched her nape. Mukhang nahihiya siyang ipakita sa akin ang mga kailangan kong gawin.

“It’s fine. Normal lang naman na matambakan ako ng trabaho dahil matagal din akong nagpahinga. Bring the files here, I’ll work on them now,” I said and smiled at her.

I guess I will be really busy, huh. Mukhang pansamantala akong mawawalan ng oras kay Xanthos. Sana lang talaga totoo ang sinabi n’yang bibisita siya rito sa office ko pero mukhang wala akong matatapos na trabaho kapag ginawa n’ya ’yon.

“What happened to the company while I was gone? Bakit mukhang hindi maganda ang lagay ng NTC?” tanong ko sa secretary ko nang madala na n’ya sa opisina ko ang mga files na kailangan kong asikasuhin.

“Sabay-sabay pong nag-pull out ng investment ang mga major investors natin. Ayaw na rin magpa-supply ng mga materials ng ibang branch sa ibang bansa. Sa totoo lang po nakakapagtaka na sabay-sabay nangyayari ’to, Ma’am Kiara. Nawawalan na rin ng tiwala ang board of directors at shareholders kay Mr. North,” paliwanag ng secretary ko.

Napabuga ako ng hangin at napahilot sa sentido ko. Ngayon lang nangyari sa ’min ang ganito. Kapag hindi naagapaan ’to, may posibildad na ma-bankrupt ang NTC o kaya mapatalsik si Dad sa sarili n’yang kompanya.

As expected, I spent my whole day in my office. Halos nalimutan ko na rin kumain pero buti na lang dinalhan ako ng pagkain ng secretary ko.

Napatingin ako sa cellphone ko nang mag-vibrate ’yon. Nabuhayan ako ng dugo nang makitang nag-text si Xanthos.

Xanthos: Still at work?

Me: Yup. I’m so busy right now. May meeting pa ako sa possible investors bukas. I wanna hug you already :(

Hindi agad siya nakapag-reply sa text ko. Napakunot na lang ang noo ko at muling bumalik sa trabaho. Napapitlag na lang ako sa gulat nang tumunog ang phone ko. Agad akong napangiti at sinagot ang tawag nang makitang si Xanthos ’yon.

Malala na ’ko.

“Hello, Xanthos.” I did my best to sound normal. I can’t show him that I’m excited just by the fact that he called me.

“Have you eaten? It’s late,” he said. He seems worried.

“Ahm, yes.” I lied.

Hindi pa ako nakakapag-dinner, mamaya na lang. Baka fast food or instant noodles na lang ang kainin ko since fast food chain at convenience stores lang naman ang bukas ng ganitong oras.

Napakurap na lang ako nang basta na lang akong binabaan ng tawag ni Xanthos. Gulat na napatingin ako sa phone ko para siguruhin na binabaan nga n’ya ako ng tawag. Napaawang na lang ang labi ko.

What the fuck is wrong with him?! I can’t believe I became excited because he called me… but that asshole dropped the call just like that? How dare him?!

I just shook my head and did my best to focus on my work. Hindi ko na lang iisipin ang lalaking ’yon… maybe he’s just busy. Well, whatever, I don’t care.

Natigilan ako nang makarinig ng katok makalipas ang ilang minuto. Agad akong napapitlag nang mapatingin sa pinto. Ngumiti sa ’kin si Xanthos at inangat ang paper bag na hawak n’ya matapos n’yang pumasok nang basta basta sa office ko.

“W-What are you doing here?” I asked, still shocked.

“I know you didn’t have dinner yet. You’re not a good liar, Kiara,” Xanthos said and sat on the chair in front of my table.

He put the paper bag on my table and took my laptop away from me. Hindi na lang ako pumalag nang niligpit n’ya rin ang mga papel sa table ko at itinabi ’yon sa gilid. Inilabas n’ya ang container na laman ng paper bag saka ipinaghain ako. Napangiti na lang ako habang nakatitig sa kanya.

“I know how dedicated you are but don’t starve yourself. Aanhin mo pa ang lahat ng pera mo kung mamamatay ka naman sa sakit?” tila nanenermong sabi n’ya.

Natawa ako sa sinabi n’ya. Grabe, bakit naman mamamatay agad ang nasa isip n’ya?

“Tatay ba kita?” natatawang tanong ko.

“No, I’m your future husband.” He grinned. He took my hand and kissed it.

“Hmm, if you’re my future husband, then my Mom will be your mother-in-law. That will be so awkward, Mr. Archante,” I said as my eyes narrowed.

“That will be chaotic, isn’t it?” he said as if it didn’t bother him at all.

I smiled when I suddenly imagine being married to him. I guess he’ s right. It will be chaotic… but exciting.

---

“Don’t skip lunch,” seryosong sabi ni Xanthos sa kabilang linya.

“Oo nga po,” sabi ko na lang habang nakatutok sa laptop.

“I’m serious, Kiara,” seryosong sabi ni Xanthos na tila nagbabanta. Natawa na lang ako at inayos ang earphone sa tainga ko.

“Fine, hindi na ’ko magpapalipas ng gutom ulit,” sabi ko na lang. Baka abutin pa kami ng ilang oras dito kapag ininis ko pa siya.

Ilang minuto rin kaming naglandian ni Xanthos sa tawag. Kailangan ko na kasing maghanda para sa meeting ko mamaya. I hope it will be successful. Wala na rin kasi kaming choice.

“Ikaw ng bahalang kumausap sa market team, you know what to fo, right?” I asked to my secretary while fixing my skirt.

“Yes, Ma’am.”

Kinuha ko na ang bag ko at agad na lumabas ng opisina ko ngunit natigilan ako nang mapansing tila nagkakagulo ang mga empleyado sa floor kung nasaan ako. Ano’ng nangyayari?

“Ma’am Kiara!”

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa ’kin ang ilang empleyado, ’yung iba nagsilapitan pa at halos napalibutan ako.

“W-What’s happening here?” I asked, stuttering.

“Ma’am Kiara, t-totoo po bang hindi na si Mr. North ang chairman ng NTC?”

Napapitlag ako sa tanong ng isang empleyado. Nagtatakang napatingin ako sa kanila, halos nasa akin naman ang tingin nilang lahat na tila hinihintay nila ang sasabihin ko. Nanghina ang mga tuhod ko at agad na napaiwas sa natatakot nilang mga mata.

“I-I will talk to Mr. North first, h’wag kayong magpanic at bumalik na lang muna sa trabaho,” pagpapakalma ko sa kanila.

Hindi ko alam kung saan ko nakuha ang lakas ng loob na sabihin ang mga ’yon kahit ako mismo ay kinakabahan ngayon. Wala akong alam sa nangyayari, hindi ko maintindihan kung ano ang nangyayari pero ayaw ko namang magtanong sa kanila. Ayokong isipin nila na masyado akong mangmang sa mga pangyayari sa sarili naming kompanya. Ayokong mawalan sila ng tiwala sa ’kin.

Agad akong nagtungo sa office ni Dad. Natigilan ako nang mapansing bahagyang nakaawang ang pinto at mukhang may kausap si Dad ngayon.

“I-I thought you’ll help me, why did you buy all the major shares behind my back?” Dad asked. His voice is shaking as if he’s about to cry.

I never saw him like this before.

“Mr. North, business is not a charity. You know that, right? Stop fighting, you’ve had enough. Hindi ko naman kinuha lahat sa ’yo. Hindi ka naman mamumulubi kung wala na sa ’yo ang NTC, ’di ba? You still have a lot of properties. Stop fighting, old man. Just sell your remaining shares to me, name your price and just take a rest with your daughter. That’s not a bad deal, right?”

Natigagal ako nang marinig ang pamilyar na boses na ’yon. Nanghihinang napakapit ako sa pintuan… hindi. Mali ako ng naririnig ngayon… imposibleng gawin n’ya sa ’kin ’to.

Dahan dahan kong itinulak ang nakaawang na pinto pero gumawa pa rin ’yon ng ingay. Napatingin sa ’kin si Dad, nanlaki ang mga mata n’ya nang makita ko pero ako ang mas nagulat sa naabutan ko. Halos nakaluhod na si Dad sa harap ng kausap n’ya ngayon.

Napatingin sa ’kin ang kausap ni Dad, tuluyan ng nanginig ang katawan ko nang makita kung sino iyon. Agad na nanlabo ang paningin ko dahil sa mga luhang nagbabadyang kumawala mula sa mga mata ko.

“Cadence…”

Chapter Sixteen

“What the hell are you doing, Cad?!”

I immediately rushed to my Dad and helped him stand up.

“W-What are you doing here?” Dad asked, stuttering.

Hindi ko sinagot ang tanong ni Dad. I guided him back to his swivel chair and glared at Cad. Mukhang hindi siya apektado na narinig ko ang mga sinabi n’ya, para bang wala siyang pakialam na magkaibigan kami.

“E-Explain this to me because I don’t understand why you’re doing this, Cad.” My voice trembled.

“The world we live in revolves around money, Kiara. I will definitely choose money over my friends and you’re not an exception,” Cad said in a calm tone. He brushed his tousled hair with his fingers and sighed as if our conversation bores him.

I gritted my teeth and glimpsed at my Dad. Nakatulala lang siya habang nakahawak sa tuhod n’ya, kumirot ang dibdib ko nang makita siya sa gano’ng estado. Huminga na lang ako nang malalim upang pakalmahin ang sarili ko. Tumingin ulit ako kay Cad at naglakad palapit sa kanya. Hinawakan ko ang kamay n’ya at hinila siya palabas ng office ni Dad. Hinila ko siya papuntang meeting room, buti na lang at walang tao ro’n ngayon.

“Cad, if this is a prank or something, I’ll kick your ass,” I warned him while gritting my teeth.

“You know, Kiara. I have no time for this. Wala na rin naman akong dapat ipaliwanag. What you hear is what you get. You heard us clearly, right? I’m now the major shareholder of NTC, you know what it means. Just convince your father to sell his remaining shares to me… for our friendship’s sake, at least.” Cad grinned and put his hand inside his pocket.

My vision became blurry as my hands trembled. I bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze. I don’t want to believe his words. The Cad I know won’t do this to me. He’s my friend whom I trust more than anyone… and he knows that.

“Why are you doing this? I’ll try to understand, do you desperately need money or something? I-I will help you, you can borrow money from me. H’wag lang ’tong kompanya. My Dad spent almost all his life making NTC successful as it is now. Please, Cad, I’ll hear you out,” I mumbled softly.

I froze when Cad chuckled as if it’s the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard. I bit my trembling lower lip and just stared at him, waiting for him to say something… even though I have a feeling that I won’t like what he’s going to say.

“Kiara, I told you before that you shouldn’t trust anyone easily… and that ‘anyone’ is me. By the way, I have to go now. It’s up to you if you still want to hook up with me or not. I really enjoyed the time we spent together.” Cad grinned and tapped my shoulder before he left.

Nanghihinang napaupo ako sa malapit na upuan. I honestly don’t know what to feel right now. My mixed emotions are uncontrollable that I don’t know what to do… I want to shout, I want to cry, I don’t know what to do. Cadence is my friend that I trust the most. His words, his actions, everything he does felt sincere that I let myself be fooled.

TAHIMIK KAMING pareho ni Dad. Nakatitig lang ako habang nakatulala siya sa kung saan. I don’t know what to say to make him feel better. I want to help him, but I’m not that influential in business world. I’m not confident, I know I can’t help him regarding NTC.

“Dad, I’ll give my shares to you. I-I know kulang pa ’yon para mahigitan ang kay Mr. Lettiere, pero baka pwede nating kausapin ang ilang shareholders para–”

Naputol ang sasabihin ko nang hawakan ni Dad ang kamay ko. He gave me a small smile and caressed my hand gently.

“It’s fine, darling. I’ll handle it. You don’t have to stress yourself over this. Pinilit ka lang ng Lolo mo na tahakin ang career na ’to, gusto kong maging malaya ka na sa gusto mo… I’m fine, your Dad can handle this.” His smile grew wider, but I know he’s just forcing himself.

The dark circles under his eyes show that he’s not okay. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko at napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya nang maramdaman kong nagbabadyang kumawala ang mga luha ko.

He’s not a perfect father but he’s perfect and the best father for me… and seeing him like this pains me. He doesn’t deserve this. My precious Dad doesn’t deserve to be tormented like this.

“Dad, I’m fine with a simple life. I don’t need a lot of money and luxuries. You know that, right?” I smiled at him. “Kung nahihirapan ka na po talaga, b-bitiwan mo na po ang kompanya. Just like Mr. Lettiere said, we still jave properties around the country. Ako na lang ang magtatrabaho para sa ’tin,” I said and gave him a smile, a reassuring one.

Napangiti na lang si Dad sa sinabi ko. Marahang hinaplos n’ya ang buhok ko habang nakatitig sa akin na para bang ako na lang ang nananatiling lakas n’ya sa lahat ng problemang kinakaharap n’ya ngayon.

“I don’t deserve a sweet and kind daughter like you,” he mumbled while caressing my hair.

“Dad, don’t change the topic. I want you to take a rest from all the stress you’ve been fighting alone. Can’t you just let go of the company? It’s just stressing you out,” I muttered softly.

Saglit na natahimik si Dad.

“I’ll think about it,” he said and gave me a smile.

I let out a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, Dad. Alam ko pong importante ang NTC para sa ’yo, ayaw ko lang po na nakikita kang nahihirapan. It pains me seeing you suffer like this.”

Marahang pinisil ni Dad ang kamay ko na tila sinasabi n’ya sa ’kin na magiging maayos din ang lahat. Tipid na napangiti na lang ako at tumango… Sana nga. Ayoko ng mahirapan pa siya lalo.

---

“I need Xanthos right now,” I murmured while staring at his picture on my phone.

I’m still staying here at Xanthos’ pad. Ayoko pa sanang iwan si Dad pero nagpumilit siya na gusto n’ya munang mapag-isa at mag-isip. Nagbilin na lang ako sa mga katulong sa bahay dahil nag-aalala ako. Dad is at his weakest right now. Sa oras na mapagdesisyunan n’yang itigil na ang pag-handle ng NTC, babalik ako sa mansyon at doon na ulit titira.

“Damn.”

I let out a heavy sigh when I suddenly remember Cadence. That jerk, he should have just explained himself properly or made an excuse. I can’t lose him like this, he’s my precious friend. He betrayed and used me and yet… deep inside I’m hoping that he has a good reason for doing it.

I took my phone when I was about to cry again and called Xanthos. I need to relax, I need to hear his voice.

“Hello, Kiara.”

I unconsciously smiled when I heard his manly and husky voice. Hearing his voice works like magic. It made me feel good somehow. I sighed and tightly closed my eyes, fighting the urge to go and see him right now. I know his a busy man too, I should know my limits.

“Ahm, a-anong oras ka uuwi?” nauutal na tanong ko.

Gusto kong batukan ang sarili ko. Bakit ngayon pa ’ko tinablan ng hiya? Mas marami pa ’kong nakakahiyang nagawa sa kanya noon.

“Why? Do you miss me already?” he asked in a teasing voice.

“Yes,” I answered immediately.

Natahimik naman siya sa kabilang linya na tila hindi n’ya inaasahan na gano’n ang magiging sagot ko. Natatawang napailing na lang ako.

“Where are you?” he asked. I can hear the sound of papers on the other line. It seems like he’s really busy.

“At your place,” I mumbled.

I looked at the time on my wristwatch. Maaga pa pala, 5 pm pa lang. Mukhang matagal pa ’kong maghihintay bago ko mayakap si Xanthos.

“Why did you ask?” I curled my hair with my finger and sighed.

“I miss you too,” he mumbled and ended the call.

I blinked twice when he suddenly ended the call. Nahihiya ba siya o sadyang busy lang talaga?

Napailing na lang ako at bumangon para mag-shower at magpalit ng damit. Sa tulog ko na lang muna idadaan ang lahat ng ’to para hindi ko na isipin nang isipin.

I took a long shower. Inabot yata ako nang mahigit isang oras sa bathroom habang nakababad sa bath tub. As much as I want to stop thinking about Cad and some stuff, I can’t stop myself thinking about them. My chest feels heavy, it seems like I won’t be able to sleep right now even if I want to.

Nagsuot ako ng robe pagkatapos kong mag-shower at agad na lumabas ng bathroom, pero halos napatalon ako sa gulat sa bumungad sa ’kin paglabas ko.

“Hi,” he said casually and waved his hand.

“W-What are you doing here, Xanthos?” I asked in disbelief. He’s really full of surprises.

He’s sitting on the bed while staring at me. He’s still wearing his work attire and it seems like he skipped his work. Did he skip his work for me? Or maybe he just forgot something important?

“Did you just cry?” he asked in a serious tone while staring at me.

I avoided his gaze and cleared my throat. Maybe I look like a messed up bitch right now.

“I asked you first,” I said and bit my lower lip.

Tumayo si Xanthos at naglakad papalapit sa ’kin. Natigilan na lang ako nang marahan n’yang hinawakan ang pisngi ko at pinaharap ako sa kanya.

“X-Xanthos?”

I stared at his handsome face. He gave me a refreshing smile that, his smile is so beautiful that it almost reached my soul. I unconsciously smiled and held his hand.

“Let’s have a date,” he said and kissed my hand. “We will go wherever you want.”

Mas lalo akong napangiti sa sinabi n’ya. Mukhang kanina pa lang napansin na n’ya na hindi maganda ang mood ko kaya umuwi siya kaagad galing sa trabaho.

I hugged his waist and buried my face on his neck. He smells good, parang hindi siya galing sa trabaho dahil ang bango pa rin n’ya.

“Hmm, how about a movie date? Kahit dito na lang para hindi na tayo lumabas,” sabi ko saka tumingin sa kanya.

Xanthos smiled at me and nodded. “That sounds good.”

XANTHOS TOOK a shower too and we just decided to order food since none of us knows how to cook properly. This is just a simple movie date but I’m still thrilled. Maybe the place or simplicity of the date doesn’t matter as long as you are with someone you really enjoyed being with. I never imagined myself being like this before. Xanthos is really something.

Sa living room na lang namin napagdesisyunan manood ng movie. Hinanda ko na ang pagkain at beer namin saka binuksan ang TV.

“Ano’ng gusto mong panoorin?” tanong ko kay Xanthos nang umupo siya sa tabi ko.

Napatingin ako sa kanya na nagpupunas ng buhok n’ya gamit ang towel. Tumayo ako saka kinuha sa kanya ’yon at ako na ang nagpunas ng basa n’yang buhok. Hindi naman siya nagreklamo at hinayaan lang ako. Napangiti na lang ako nang bigla siyang yumakap sa baywang ko.

“You smell good,” he muttered and buried his face on tummy. I let out a soft chuckle and gently caressed his curly hair. “What movie genre do you want?” he asked and looked at me.

“Hmm, hindi naman ako mapili sa movie… but I like horror and action movies more, especially zombie movies. How about you?” I asked and kissed the tip of his nose.

“I rarely watch movies. I prefer watching documentaries. But I think I like action movies too.” He sounded unsure.

“Hmm, how about a horror movie?” I excitedly asked.

“Okay, if that’s what you want,” he said and let me sit on his lap.

We decided to watch a horror movie that Xanthos and I haven’t watched yet. It seems like he’s really not into watching movies, hindi n’ya alam halos lahat ng suggested movies ko sa kanya.

“What is that movie all about?” Xanthos asked while eating fries.

“Ahm, ghost?” I chuckled. “By the way, kailangan ba talaga nakakandong ako sa ’yo?” natatawang tanong ko.

Hindi sumagot si Xanthos at sinubuan na lang ako ng fries saka mas niyakap ako papalapit sa kanya. Natawa na lang ako at hinayaan siya sa trip n’ya.

Nagsimula na kaming manood. Gusto kong mapaismid habang nanonood na kami dahil hindi naman gaanong nakakatakot ’tong pinapanood namin. Dapat tiningnan ko muna ang reviews bago ako pumili ng movie… o baka naman sadyang sanay na ’kong manood ng mga ganito kaya hindi na masyadong nakakatakot para sa ’kin.

“What the fuck?”

Natigilan ako nang halos mapatalon si Xanthos sa gulat nang biglang magpakita ang multo a movie. Natatawang napatingin ako sa kanya.

“Are you scared?” I asked while trying to stop myself from laughing out loud. I didn’t expect him to react like this on a horror movie.

“No, it’s just… the background music is exaggerating,” he said and cleared his throat.

Natatawang napailing na lang ako at muling binaling ang atensyon sa movie habang nainom ng beer. Medyo nagiging blurry na ang paningin ko dahil marami na rin akong nainom.

Pinakiramdaman ko si Xanthos na kanina pa tahimik. Gusto kong matawa sa tuwing napapapitlag siya at pasimpleng nagtatago sa likuran ko kapag nakakatakot na ang scene. I honestly didn’t expect him to be scared over a horror movie. Nahahalata kong pinipigil n’ya lang ang sarili n’ya na h’wag mag-react.

“Ah, the movie’s finally done. It was boring as hell. Hindi naman nakakatakot.” I let out a heavy sigh.

Xanthos looked at me with disbelief in his eyes. I want to laugh my ass off because he looked like a scared child right now. Mukhang hindi agad siya makaka-move on sa pinanood namin.

“Y-You didn’t find that fucking movie scary?” he asked, still stunned.

Natawa na lang ako at yumakap sa batok n’ya. Medyo lasing na yata talaga ako dahil gusto ko siyang pagtrip-an ngayon. Ang cute talaga ng reaction n’ya sa movie na pinanood namin. Hindi ko talaga ine-expect ’yon.

“Let’s watch another movie, I want something scarier than that,” I said and smiled sweetly.

“S-Something scarier?”

Tuluyan na akong natawa nang halos mawalan ng kulay ang mukha n’ya. Nanggigigil na kinurot ko ang pisngi n’ya saka dinampian ng halik ang labi n’ya.

I laughed. “You’re such a cute baby.”

“You’re making fun of me,” tila nagtatampong sabi n’ya.

Napangiti na lang ako at yumakap sa batok n’ya. Napatitig ako sa gwapong mukha n’ya habang hindi maalis ang ngiti sa labi ko. Gusto kong matawa dahil napapaismid pa rin siya.

“Thank you, Xanthos,” I mumbled and gave him a soft kiss on his right cheek.

His expression softened. He smiled at me and caressed my hair gently.

“For what?”

“For making me feel better,” I answered.

“I knew it, you had a hard time today, haven’t you? You can tell it to me if you want to,” he said in a soft voice while still caressing my hair.

I bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze.

“W-Well, Cadence is your close friend, right?” I asked, stuttering.

“Hmm, you can say that. But we’re actually not that close. Why are you asking that?” he asked.

“Ahm, today I discovered that he’s just betraying me. He’s now the major shareholder of NTC and he did that behind my father’s back. I don’t want to think that he really wanted to betray me. Gusto kong isipin na kailangan n’ya lang talaga ng pera kaya n’ya nagawa ’yon. I keep on making excuses inside my head because I don’t want to lose a friend like him… but what about Dad? He’s suffering too. As much as I want to let this pass and let Cad become my friend again… I just… I can’t stop thinking about how my Dad was on his knees, how my Dad suffered from stress and everything. I don’t know what to do anymore,” I mumbled softly. I just bit the insides of my cheeks, trying to stop myself from bursting into tears. “W-Why did he do that, Xanthos?”

“I don’t know why Cad did that, but Cad loves money more than everything. I guess he had a rough childhood regarding money or something. I don’t know so I can’t judge him. What he did was wrong but the business world is always like that. You can’t trust everyone around you.” He sighed and hugged my waist. “Do you want me to help you?” he asked and looked at me.

“No, you don’t have to. Being with me right now is already a big help. Thank you for making me feel better,” I mumbled and hugged him tighter.

“I should be the one to say that,” he said and kissed my lips gently.

“Why?” I didn’t do something for him to thank me.

Hindi siya sumagot at mas hinigpitan ang yakap sa ’kin. Napangiti na lang ako at hinaplos ang buhok n’ya na tuyo na ngayon.

“Xanthos.”

“Hmm?” he asked while staring at me as if I’m the most beautiful in his eyes.

“I love you.”

Halatang natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. Napangiti na lang ako sa naging reaksyon n’ya. Bahagyang napaawang ang mga labi n’ya na para bang hindi n’ya inaasahan na sasabihin ko ’yon.

“K-Kiara, I-I don’t know what to say or how to react… I–” Dinampian ko ng halik ang labi n’ya para patigilin siya sa sasabihin n’ya.

“You don’t need to respond. I know it’s too fast for you. I just want to say it but I don’t want to burden you with my confession,” I said and smiled at him.

I don’t know why I’m not nervous or anything right now. This is the first time I told that special three words to someone but for some unknown reason… I’m not nervous at all.

Saglit siyang natahimik habang nakatitig pa rin sa ’kin. Natigilan na lang ako nang bigla n’yang hawakan ang likod ko at hinila ako para yakapin. Napakurap na lang ako at gumanti ng yakap sa kanya.

He gave my cheek a soft kiss and murmured something to my ear. “Damn, you’re full of surprises… and you’re really the most amazing woman.”

• • • ~ ~ ~ * * *

Ely’s note: miss u all hehez

Chapter Seventeen

“Kumusta po si Dad? Nakakakain po ba siya nang ayos?” tanong ko kay Manang Lanie na katulong namin sa mansyon.

Tumingin ako sa salamin habang sinusuklay ang buhok ko. Balak kong bisitahin si Dad ngayon dahil malamang hanggang ngayon namomroblema siya sa kompanya. Ayaw n’ya lang ako i-text o tawagan dahil ayaw n’yang naaabala n’ya ako.

“Nitong mga nakaraang araw, walang gana kumain si Sir. Madalas din siyang napapainom ng alak,” sabi ni Manang Lanie sa kabilang linya.

I let out a heavy sigh and tightly closed my eyes. I expected this to happen. Dad always deals with his problem alone and I don’t like it. I want to be by his side at the weakest point of his life.

“Sige po, pupunta po ako riyan ngayon para bisitahin siya.”

Muli akong tumingin sa salamin nang matapos kong kausapin si Manang Lanie sa phone. Hindi na ako naglagay ng heavy makeup at simpleng dress na lang din ang sinuot ko.

“Kiara.”

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Lumapit siya sa ’kin at humawak sa balikat ko. Mukhang may lakad din siya ngayon. He’s just wearing a simple white shirt with black blazer and jeans.

Tumayo ako at lumapit kay Xanthos saka yumakap sa baywang n’ya, agad naman siyang gumanti ng yakap sa ’kin. “Pupuntahan ko si Dad. Ikaw? May lakad ka rin?”

Xanthos nodded. “Yes. I have a scheduled meeting with the board of directors, Akira will be there too.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Bigla kong naalala si Mom, ang tagal ko na rin siyang nakakamusta.

“Why are you telling me that?” My eyebrow arched.

“I want to be honest with you. Well , it’s not a big deal anyway,” he said and shrugged.

I sighed and bit my lower lip. Xanthos kissed my forehead gently while caressing my hair. He loves doing that especially before we go to sleep. It’s really comforting. It feels home.

“Let’s have sex tonight,” I muttered and hugged him tighter.

Halatang natigilan si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. Marahan siyang kumalas sa pagkakayakap sa ’kin saka tumingin sa mukha ko. Napaismid na lang ako at napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya.

“Damn, Kiara. I honestly can’t keep up with your boldness.” Xanthos let out a sexy chuckle. “Hmm, let’s just cancel our schedules today. Let’s have sex right now, all day,” he said and hugged me. His hands started roaming around my body.

“A true man can wait,” I said with a teasing voice and pushed him gently.

Xanthos chuckled and pinched my nose. “What a tease.”

“Ewan ko sa ’yo, bye na nga. I have to go.” I took my sling bag and gave him a soft kiss on the lips.

Umalis na rin ako kaagad pakatapos kong magpaalam kay Xanthos. Habang nasa byahe, hindi maalis sa isip ko si Dad.

Mukhang kailangan ko ng dalasan ang pagbisita sa kanya. Nag-aalala na rin talaga ako.

---

“Nu’ng nakaraan pa kita gustong tawagan, Kiara. Kaso ayaw naman ng Daddy mo na mag-alala ka kaya ayaw n’yang tawagan o i-text ka,” sabi ni Manang Lanie habang inaayos ang mga pinamili kong pagkain para kay Dad.

Napabuntonghininga ako. “Manang, sabihan n’yo pa rin po ako ng updates about Dad. Kahit palihim na lang po. Nag-aalala rin po kasi ako sa kanya.”

I roamed my eyes around the house. Happy memories from my childhood filled my mind. I didn’t notice that my parents weren’t in good terms before. I didn’t notice that they were just pretending to be perfect parents in front of me. I don’t know if I should be happy about it knowing the efforts they had gone through just to give me a perfect family and a happy childhood… but thinking about it doesn’t make me happy at all.

I just shook my head and sighed.

“Nasaan po si Dad?” tanong ko kay Manang Lanie.

“Nandoon sa library, may kausap siya ro’n na mukhang importanteng tao.”

I nodded. “Okay, I’ll just wait for him here.”

Lumabas ako at nagtungo sa garden at doon na lang ako tumambay habang naghihintay kay Dad. Napaisip tuloy ako kung sino’ng kausap n’ya ngayon. Simula ng maagaw kay Dad ang posisyon na chairman ng NTC, wala na rin paramdam ang mga tao sa kanya… siguro nga gano’n talaga ang realidad.

Halos kalahating oras din akong nakaupo sa bench at naghintay. Napatayo lang ako nang mapansing may lalaking lumabas ng bahay, pero natigilan din ako nang mapagtanto kung sino ’yon.

Cadence…

“W-What are you doing here?! Did you give my Dad a hard time again?!”

Lumapit ako sa kanya at nakipaglabanan ng tingin sa kanya. Napabuga na lang siya ng hangin at bahagyang ginulo ang buhok n’ya.

“Damn give me a break,” he murmured.

He didn’t answer my question and just left me hanging here. Napaawang na lang ang labi ko nang talikuran n’ya ako basta. Napaismid ako at pinigilan ang sarili ko na habulin siya at suntukin. Ano ba’ng problema n’ya?!

I bit my lower lip and shook my head. I honestly missed him. I missed our moments together. Na-miss ko rin ang kakulitan at trip n’ya sa buhay, pero napapaisip ako kung totoo ba talaga ang mga pinakita n’ya noon.

Napabuntong hininga na lang ako at pumasok na lang sa loob. Bahala na siya sa buhay n’ya. I shouldn’t be acting like this towards him, he betrayed my Dad… He’s a money-obsessed asshole!

“Nasa library pa rin po ba si Dad?” tanong ko kay Manang Lanie.

Tumango siya. “Oo hija, hindi pa siya nalabas sa library.”

“Sige po, nasaan na po ang hinanda n’yong lunch for him? Ako na po ang magdadala.”

Dumiretso agad ako sa library dala ang tray na may pagkain. Siguradong hindi makakatanggi si Dad kapag ako ang nagdala ng pagkain sa kanya.

“Dad.”

Agad na napatigil si Dad sa pagbabasa ng dyaryo at napatingin sa direksyon ko. Napangiti siya at agad na tumayo para salubungin ako.

“What are you doing here, Kiara?” Dad asked and took the tray from me.

“Well, I just want to visit you. Bawal po ba?” may bahid na pagbibirong tanong ko.

Dad guided me to sit beside him. I sighed and hugged his waist. “Dad, ano pong pinag-usapan n’yo ni Mr. Lettiere?”

Natigilan si Dad sa tanong ko, pero ngumiti lang siya sa ’kin at bahagyang hinaplos ang buhok ko. “I sold my remaining shares to him.”

My mouth agape. I looked at Dad with disbelief in my eyes. I wasn’t expecting that he’ll really do that. His life revolves around NTC, he spent almost all his life, working his ass off for NTC… I don’t know what trick Cadence used to manipulate Dad like this. Siguro nga hindi ko pa talaga siya gano’ng kilala. He’s more dangerous than I imagine.

“You have 15 percent company shares, Kiara. You can do whatever you want with it… it’s up to you. I’ll always support your decision,” Dad said and gave me a faint smile.

Now that he mentioned it, I honestly don’t know what to do with my shares. Should I just sell it too? But I don’t want to sell my shares to Cad. Kung sa iba ko ibebenta ’yon, malamang magagawan pa rin ng paraan ni Cad para mabili ’yon.

Napailing na lang ako. Sabagay, ano naman kung mabili ni Cad ’yon? Siya na rin naman ang bagong chairman ng NTC. Wala ng epekto sa posisyon n’ya kung bibilhin n’ya o hindi ang shares ko.

“Dad, magtatrabaho ako sa ibang kompanya. I’ll start over again, you don’t have to stress yourself about financial matters. Leave it to your daughter. All you have to do from now on is to relax. You spent all years working like there’s no tomorrow. Magpahinga ka na lang po rito sa bahay or magbakasyon paminsan-minsan.” I smiled at him.

Dad let out a refreshing laugh. “You’re treating me like a helpless old man, Kiara.”

“You’re not getting any younger, Dad. So please stop acting like a rebellious Dad and live a healthy life. Okay?” I said and pointed the food.

Natawa na lang si Dad sa sinabi ko at napatango. “I can’t say no to my precious daughter.”

Saglit pa kaming nagkwentuhan ni Dad bago ko napagdesisyunang umalis. Balak ko na rin kasing asikasuhin ang paghahanap ko ng bagong pagtatrabahuhan. Ayokong mag-stay sa NTC kung kay Cadence lang din naman ako magtatrabaho. Baka araw-araw lang akong mainis.

“Manang Lanie, isumbong n’yo pa rin po sa ’kin ang mga ginagawa ni Dad,” bilin ko.

Napangiti naman si Manang. “Sige, Kiara. Kapag hindi na naman nagkakakain si Sir, isusumbong ko siya sa ’yo.”

Pagkatapos kong magbilin kay Manang Lanie, lumabas na ako ng mansyon… ngunit natigilan ako nang mapansing nandoon pa rin si Cad. Nakasandal siya sa kotse n’ya habang nakatitig sa ’kin. Napaismid na lang ako at nag-iwas ng tingin sa kanya.

Don’t mind him, Kiara. He’s just here to make fun of me or brag that he’s finally the new owner of NTC.

I didn’t talk to him and just typed on my phone. Ang tagal naman dumating ng taxi.

“Hoy.”

Natigilan ako nang marinig ko ang boses ni Cad. Nagmatigas na lang ako at hindi siya nilingon. Ang kapal naman ng face n’ya kung iniisip n’yang papansinin ko pa rin siya.

Naramdaman kong naglakad siya papalapit sa ’kin. Natigilan ako nang hawakan n’ya ang kamay ko saka hinila ako.

“Hey! What the fuck are you doing, jerk?! Let me go!” I tried to remove my hand from his grasp but he just held my hand tighter.

Binuksan n’ya ang kotse n’ya at sapilitan akong pinaupo sa shotgun seat. Akmang lalabas ako pero agad n’yang isinara ang pinto saka umikot at sumakay sa driver seat. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at hindi na lang pumalag.

“What the hell are you up to? Why are you doing this?” I asked.

Hindi sinagot ni Cad ang tanong ko at pinaandar na lang ang kotse n’ya.

“Did you wait for me to brag? or are you interested on my remaining company shares?” My eyebrow arched.

“Wala akong pake sa shares mo, tanga,” sabi n’ya na nagpasinghap sa ’kin.

“H-How dare–” agad n’yang pinutol ang sasabihin ko.

“H’wag ka na lang magsalita, please. Ihahagis kita sa labas.”

Agad akong natahimik sa sinabi n’ya. I don’t know if he’s just joking or what, his face looks serious but I can’t take him seriously for some reason.

“Saan mo ’ko dadalhin?” tanong ko na lang saka napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya.

“Sa pad ni Xanthos. Diba do’n ka natuloy ngayon? Ihahatid lang naman kita ro’n, e. OA ka lang talaga.” parang wala lang na sabi n’ya.

My lips parted. “H-How did you know?”

“Alam ko lahat. Gano’n ako kagaling,” sabi na lang n’ya.

I bit my lower lip to stop myself from laughing out loud. This man is ridiculous and unfair as fuck. He’s obviously doing this on purpose. He knows I can’t hate him. He’s so unfair!

“Kiara.”

Natigilan ako nang tawagin n’ya ko. Tumingin ako sa kanya habang siya ay seryoso pa rin ang mukha na nagmamaneho.

“I like money.”

I examined his face to see if he’s just kidding or if he’s actually serious… It seems like he’s really serious right now. But why is he telling me this?

“Well, I like you too, but I like money more.”

Saglit siyang tumingin sa ’kin saka tipid na ngumiti. Natulala na lang ako sa sinabi n’ya dahil hindi ko maintindihan ang ibig n’yang sabihin.

It seems like Cad is weirder than I thought.

---

“He’s not here yet,” I mumbled while massaging my leg.

I looked at the wall clock. It’s already 8 pm. I haven’t eat dinner yet. Nagugutom na ako pero ayaw kumilos ng katawan ko para um-order ng pagkain. Naiisip ko si Dad, si Mom, si Cadence, pati na rin si Xanthos. Bakit wala pa rin siya hanggang ngayon?

Baka nawili siyang kausap si Mom?

I shook my head and gently slapped myself. What the hell am I thinking? I’m jealous of my own mother, that’s weird. But can you blame me? Mom is still beautiful as hell, some people even say that she’s more beautiful than me. Well, I can say that it’s true. Mom is naturally beautiful that even her age doesn’t give her justice.

“Kiara.”

Napatayo ako nang marinig ko ang boses ni Xanthos. Agad siya nagtungo papalapit sa ’kin at niyakap ako. Napaismid na lang ako at gumanti ng yakap sa kanya. Ang bango n’ya talaga, nakakawala ng inis.

Napalayo rin agad ako sa kanya nang kumalam ang sikmura ko. Agad akong napakagat sa ibabang labi ko nang maramdaman kong nag-init ang buong mukha ko.

Damn, that’s so unwomanly.

I expected him to laugh but he just held my shoulder and looked at me with his typical serious face.

“Hindi ka pa nakain?” nakakunot-noong tanong n’ya.

I bit the insides of my cheeks. He looks like an angry Dad right now.

“Ahm, I forgot,” I said and smiled sweetly at him.

He sighed. “How can you forget something important?” He pinched my nose. “Go, change your clothes. We’ll have a dinner date.”

Natigilan ako. “Diba nakapag-dinner ka na? Sabi mo sa text kanina.”

“Joke lang ’yon,” sabi naman n’ya.

Natawa na lang ako. Gano’n ba siya mag-joke?

Wala na ’kong nagawa kundi ang magpalit ng damit. Mukhang desidido talaga siya sa dinner date na ’to. Saka gusto ko rin naman kumain sa labas kasama siya.

Agad din kaming umalis pagkatapos kong magbihis. Hindi na ako nag-ayos nang sobra dahil nagugutom na rin talaga ako. Beige chiffon dress lang ang sinuot ko at hindi na rin ako nag-abalang ayusin nang sobra ang buhok ko.

“You’re beautiful, as always,” Xanthos muttered and held my hand while driving. I just chuckled and shook my head.

“By the way, where do you want to eat?” he asked.

“Hmm, I’m craving for Japanese food. Nakain ka ba no’n?” tanong ko naman sa kanya.

“Yeah, I usually eat Japanese food since I have a lot of Japanese investors.”

Napagdesisyunan naming kumain sa Japanese restaurant. Maayos ang napili n’yang restaurant, wala ring masyadong tao na mas gusto ko.

“How’s your Dad?” Xanthos asked and held my hand on top of the table. We’re currently waiting for our order.

“He’s doing fine, I think.” I let out a heavy sigh. “Binitiwan n’ya na ang NTC. Babalik na rin ako sa ’min since ayaw kong iwanan si Dad mag-isa ro’n. Okay lang ba ’yon sa ’yo?” tanong ko.

“Well, I’ll miss you more and it won’t be easy for me. But your Dad needs you more right now. I’ll always visit you, I hope you’ll do the same.” He kissed my hand gently.

“You can visit me to my new workplace. I’ll find a new company to work for tomorrow. Ayoko ng magtrabaho sa NTC.” Hindi katulad ni Dad, hindi ko gaanong pinanghahawakan ang NTC.

“Why don’t you work at AAC?” Xanthos asked with a grin on his face.

My eyebrow arced. “AAC? You mean, Archante Automobile Corp?”

“Yeah. I’m not saying this because I like you… You are a competent worker. Someone like you will be an asset to my company,” he said and intertwined our fingers.

I bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze. Did he just realize what he just said? He indirectly said that he likes me! My heart is beating like hell right now.

I calmed myself and looked at him. “I-I will think about it.”

Napangiti na lang si Xanthos saka muling dinampian ng halik ang kamay ko. Buti na lang talaga walang gaanong tao rito.

Xanthos has more malanding hormones than me. I won’t let him beat me!

Nang dumating na ang order namin, napansin ko na konti lang ang kinakain n’ya. Mukhang busog na siya, buti na lang gutom na gutom ako kaya ako na ang kumakain ng sa kanya.

“Busog ka na?” tanong ni Xanthos.

Magkahawak-kamay na lumabas kami ng restau. Kinuha ko ang kamay n’ya at nilagay ’yon sa tiyan ko.

Napasimangot ako. “Ang laki na ng tiyan ko. Kailangan kong mag-exercise nang matindi bukas.”

“What a cute tummy.” Xanthos let out a chuckle. He gently pinched my tummy.

I pouted and hugged his arm. “Maglakad-lakad muna tayo, Xanthos.”

Napangiti na lang ako nang magsimula kaming maglakad. Kahit gabi na, maliwanag pa rin sa paligid. Naalala ko tuloy noong nagsimba kami. Simpleng lugar lang ang mga pinuntahan namin pero isa ’yon sa date na pinakanagustuhan ko.

“Kiara.”

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos nang tawagin n’ya ’ko. Napatingin din siya sa ’kin saka inipit ang ilang hibla ng buhok ko sa ilalim ng tainga ko.

“Hmm?” I asked. He’s staring at me intently right now. I feel like melting under his stare… His eyes are passionate. His eyes are telling me something that his lips can’t tell. I can’t take my eyes off him, it feels like I can stare at him forever.

“You said you love me last time, right? Are you serious about it? I mean, do you really love me?” he asked.

“W-Why are you suddenly asking me that?” I stuttered.

Napaiwas siya ng tingin sa ’kin. Hindi nakawala sa paningin ko ang bahagyang pamumula ng tainga n’ya. Dahil ba ’yon sa lamig ng hangin o dahil nahihiya siya?

“I love you too,” he mumbled that I almost didn’t hear it.

Napakurap ako. Hindi kaagad nagproseso sa utak ko ang sinabi n’ya.

“Huh?” I asked absentmindedly.

Did I hear it right? Did he really say he loves me?

I took a deep breath and try to calm myself. My heart beats faster than before. My hands became sweaty and I can feel something ticklish in my stomach.

“W-What did you say, Xanthos?”

“I love you, Kiara. I’m so in love with you.”

Chapter Eighteen

“Kanina ka pa tahimik.”

I glared at Xanthos and punched him lightly on his arm. He just chuckled and hugged me closer to him.

“Paano ako hindi matatahimik? Binigla mo ’ko! Y-You just said you love me too,” I murmured the last part.

Xanthos held my hand and slowly intertwined our fingers. He stared at me as if his world revolves around me. Every time he looks at me like that, it feels like I’m the most beautiful woman in his eyes. His eyes and stare alone boost my confidence. He always makes me feel beautiful and worth it.

“You don’t know how shocked I was when you told me that you love me… and the fact that you confessed smoothly, with confidence. Damn, how can you do that?” He sighed and put my hand on his chest. “Can you feel how nervous I am right now? My hands are still sweating. I’m nervous as fuck,” he mumbled and let out a heavy sigh.

I laughed when I felt his fast heartbeat. He’s really nervous his hands are still shaking until now. I didn’t expect him to react like this. He looked confident when he confessed earlier… He’s 34 now but he’s still cute. Xanthos is really driving me crazy.

“Hindi ka naman mukhang kinakabahan kanina, e,” natatawang sabi ko na lang saka yumakap sa baywang n’ya.

“Of course, I want to look cool on that moment,” he murmured.

I laughed again and pinched his cheeks. “You’re so cute, Xanthos.”

His eyes narrowed. “What? I’m cute? I hope you can still say that later… on our bed,” he said seductively and gave my cheek a soft kiss.

“Bring it on.” I chuckled.

Tumuloy na kami sa paglalakad. Sa mga oras na ’to, ito ang pakiramdam na ayaw kong matapos. Hindi ko pa naramdaman ang ganitong pakiramdam sa iba. Hindi ko alam kung ano’ng ginawa ni Xanthos sa sistema ko… pero gusto ko ang pakiramdam na ’to.

“Are you my boyfriend now?” I asked and hugged Xanthos’ arm.

“Hmm, it’s up to you… Sinasagot mo na ba ako?” tanong n’ya saka tumitig sa ’kin.

Natawa ako. “Hindi ka naman nanliligaw.”

“I honestly don’t know how courtship works. Do I need to chop woods or something?” he asked. He doesn’t seem sarcastic. It looks like he’s really curious about courtship.

“Well, not really. There’s no rules in courting anyway. Courting someone means you’re doing your best to make yourself worthy of that person’s love. It’s a way of showing your feelings to someone. It’s like saying to someone that you love her, but instead of saying it, you’re showing it with your actions. Just like that,” I explained.

Natahimik naman si Xanthos habang nakatitig sa ’kin. Napakurap na lang ako at nilabanan ang titig n’ya. Bakit ganyan siya makatingin sa ’kin?

“That sounds good. You deserve to be courted so… I’ll court you first,” he said and kissed my hand.

I bit my lower lip to prevent myself from smiling. Damn this man. Where did he learn those cheesy lines? I found those corny before and now here I am… smiling like an idiot because someone told me those ‘cheesy’ lines.

Hinubad ni Xanthos ang blazer n’ya at pinasuot sa ’kin bago kami tumuloy sa paglalakad.

“Kiara, your Mom invited me to her birthday party tomorrow.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi ni Xanthos. Oo nga pala, birthday ni Mom bukas. Bakit hindi n’ya man lang ako tine-text para imbitahan ako? Nagtatampo ba siya dahil hindi ko siya nabibisita o nakakamusta?

“Do you want to come?” I asked.

“I’ll only attend if you’ll be there,” he said and held my hand again.

“Siguro nga dapat akong pumunta. Baka nagtatampo na si Mom sa ’kin.” Napabuntonghininga ako.

“Pupunta rin ako,” sabi na lang n’ya.

“But we can’t go there together. Hindi pa alam ni Mom ang tungkol sa ’tin. Mag-iipon pa ’ko ng lakas ng loob. Okay lang ba?” tanong ko saka tumingin sa kanya.

“It’s okay, I will always respect your decision. I know it won’t be easy for us anyway. I’m sorry,” he mumbled and caressed my cheek gently.

My eyes narrowed. “You should be. How dare you seduce my mother?”

“Hey, I didn’t seduce her. Our relationship is clear from the start. I never thought she’ll like me for real. But still, I’m responsible for it. So I’ll deal with it.”

Napangiti na lang ako at tumango sa sinabi n’ya. “My man is responsible, I’ll give you one point.”

Xanthos let out a sexy laugh. He held my waits and pulled me closer to him.

“What have you done to me, Kiara Amaris?” he asked in a low tone.

“I should be the one asking that. What have you done to me, Xanthos Archante?” I asked and raised an eyebrow.

Xanthos hugged me and kissed my temple. I just closed my eyes and hugged him back. His warm embrace is the most comfortable feeling that I’ve felt. It feels like I truly belong in his arms, it feels like this is where I should be.

---

“Can’t we just go there togeher?” Xanthos asked while hugging my waist.

“It will be suspicious,” I said and took the car key from him.

“We can just tell her that I happen to saw you and–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“H’wag kang makulit. Iisang lugar lang naman ang pupuntahan natin, e,” natatawang sabi ko saka dinampian ng halik ang labi n’ya.

Xanthos sighed and hugged me tighter. “Fine.”

Agad na akong kumalas sa pagkakayakap n’ya at nagtungo sa isang kotse. I don’t have my car with me so I just borrowed one of his cars.

Agad ko ng pinaandar ang kotse pagkasakay ko dahil baka bigla na namang bumuntot si Xanthos. Habang tumatagal, nakikita ko ang makulit na side n’ya.

Saglit na napatingin ako sa paper bag na nasa shotgun seat. Bumili ako ng kwintas na ireregalo ko kay Mom. Mukhang nagtatampo talaga siya kaya plano kong lambingin siya mamaya kapag nakita ko siya.

Nakarating din agad ako sa hotel na paggaganapan ng birthday ni Mom. Bumaba ako ng kotse bitbit ang paper bag saka inayos ang buhok ko… I hope I don’t stand out too much. I’m wearing a silver long gown and I realized that it’s too attention-grabbing… Well, whatever.

Hindi ko na hinintay si Xanthos at nauna na ’kong dumiretso sa hotel. Alam ko na naman kung saan gaganapin ’yon. Dito sa Spade Hotel nagce-celebrate si Mom ng birthday n’ya every year. Siya ang may ari ng hotel na ’to, napag-usapan pa namin noon na itong hotel ang plano ni Mom na iregalo sa 25th birthday ko.

Nakarating na ’ko sa venue ng party, sa garden ng hotel. Buti na lang at alam ng guard na anak ako ni Mom at pinapasok ako kahit wala akong invitation card. Marami-rami ring bisita si Mom. Mukhang kilala rin ang ang mga bisita n’ya sa business world.

“Where’s Mom?” I mumbled while roaming my eyes around the place.

“Hoy, Kiara!”

Napalingon ako sa tumawag sa ’kin. Napangiti na lang ako nang makitang si Abi ’yon. Nasabi n’ya nga pala sa ’kin kanina na pupunta siya sa birthday ni Mom.

“Abi, I missed you!” I hugged her.

“Hindi kita na-miss, slight lang,” sabi na lang n’ya saka gumanti ng yakap sa ’kin.

“By the way, nakita mo ba si Mom?” tanong ko sa kanya.

“Ah, Tita Akira’s over there. May kausap siyang bisita,” sabi ni Abi saka itinuro kung nasaan si Mom.

“Thank you, bitch. I’ll just talk to her and give my gift for her… gonna talk to you later,” I said and tapped her shoulder before I left.

Pinuntahan ko si Mom. Halos matulala ako nang makita siya. I’m her daughter but my Mom’s beauty never fails to amaze me every time I see her. She’s more beautiful right now with her gold long gown. My Mom is the most beautiful woman in my eyes. I won’t even blame Xanthos if he’ll admit that he found my Mom attractive, because she really is. She looks like an angel that most people thought she’s just my sister and not my mother.

Huminga ako nang malalim bago tuluyang naglakad palapit kay Mom. Buti na lang at wala na siyang kausap.

“Mom.”

Natigilan si Mom nang mapatingin sa akin. I just gave her a small smile and scratched my nape.

“Hello, Mom. Happy birthday,” I said and gave her my gift.

“Akala ko nakalimutan mo ng may nanay ka,” nakapamaywang na sabi ni Mom na tila nanenermon.

I pouted and gave her a hug. “Sorry po, Mom. Busy lang po talaga,” I mumbled the last part.

I can’t tell her I’m busy flirting with Xanthos… But that’s not the only reason why I’m busy though.

Mom’s eyes narrowed. “Do you have a boyfriend already?” she asked in a teasing voice.

Napakurap ako sa tanong ni Mom. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko at umiling.

“I don’t have a boyfriend, Mom.”

Xanthos is not my boyfriend yet so… I think that’s the right answer.

“I told you to settle on a serious relationship. Stop fooling around with men you just met at some place,” Mom said while shaking her head.

Natigilan si Mom nang mapatingin sa likuran ko. Agad siyang napangiti.

“Xanthos, you came.”

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko nang lumapit si Mom kay Xanthos. Pasimple akong tumingin kay Xanthos na nakatingin sa ’kin ngayon. Tiningnan ko naman siya ng masama.

“Happy birthday, Akira. By the way, I forgot to buy you a gift,” Xanthos said coldly.

I let out a heavy sigh. I told him to buy gift earlier but he doesn’t want to. Tinatamad daw siya.

“Oh, it’s okay. Ang mahalaga nagpunta ka rito,” nakangiting sabi ni Mom.

Napabuntonghininga na lang ako habang nakatingin sa kanila. It seems like Mom really like Xanthos. Paano pa ako magkakalakas ng loob na sabihin ang tungkol sa’min ni Xanthos? Ayokong saktan si Mom pero ayoko namang magsinungaling pa sa kanya.

“Hmm, wala ka na bang sasabihin? Birthday message for me or something like that?” Mom asked.

“Well, I wish you won’t die early,” Xanthos said.

Mom laughed. “You and your weird remarks,” Mom said while shaking her head.

They seem closer than I think.

I cleared my throat. “Mom, I’m here,” I said, trying to stop myself from rolling my eyes.

Hindi ko na sila kayang tingnan nang matagal. I hate the fact that they look good together.

“Oh, sorry, sweetie. By the way, since you said you don’t have a boyfriend yet, I’ll introduce to a handsome bachelor,” Mom said and held my hand.

Hindi nakawala sa paningin ko ang pagkunot ng noo ni Xanthos na para bang hindi n’ya nagustuhan ang narinig n’ya. Nakaramdam ako nang kaunting kaba.

Sana makapagtimpi siya.

“Ahm, Mom, you don’t have to. I don’t need…”

Hindi nakinig si Mom at hinila ako palapit sa isang table.

“Hello, Mr. Farthon.”

Pinaupo ako ni Mom sa upuan na katabi ng lalaking tinawag n’ya na Mr. Farthon. Napakurap na lang ako nang mapatingin sa akin ang lalaki.

“Mr. Farthon, this is my daughter, Kiara North. Kiara, dear, this is Mr. Farthon, the current chairman of Farthon Group,” Mom said and tapped my shoulder.

Napalunok na lang ako nang bigla kaming iwan ni Mom.

He’s really handsome that I couldn’t take my eyes off him. His blue eyes are the coldest eyes I’ve seen.

“I’m not interested in you and I’m already married,” he said in a cold tone.

I smiled awkwardly and nodded.

“Ahm, yes, sorry about my Mom, Mr. Farthon. She thought you’re still a bachelor,” I said and smiled at him.

“Okay,” sabi na lang n’ya saka tumayo at umalis.

Napakurap na lang ako at hinabol siya ng tingin. Hindi ko alam kung matatawa ba ako o maiinis sa ginawa n’ya.

Natigilan ako nang maramdaman kong sunod-sunod na nag-vibrate ang phone ko. Agad kong kinuha ’yon mula sa sling bag ko para tingnan kung sino ang nag-text.

Xanthos:

Where are you?

This is so frustrating.

Who are you with right now?

Damn, Kiara. We should just tell Akira about us. As in right now.

I bit my lower lip while reading Xanthos’ messages. Damn this man. I can imagine what he looks like right now.

Agad akong nag-reply sa kanya.

There’s a swing at the corner part of this garden. Let’s meet there… it’s also dark there, if you know what I mean.

I smiled at my own message. Mukhang kailangan ko siyang lambingin.

Nagtungo na ako sa pagkikitaan namin. Medyo sulok na parte na ng garden ’yon at wala talagang tao. Tago rin ang pwestong ’yon sa mga tao.

I sat on the swing while waiting for Xanthos. Maybe he’s having a hard time looking for this place.

I smiled when I saw Xanthos walking to my direction but my smile vanished when I saw his face. He looks pissed and annoyed.

Uh-oh.

“Bakit mukhang kang pinagsakluban ng langit at lupa?” natatawang tanong ko.

“Who’s the handsome bachelor you just met? I’ll ruin his life,” Xanthos said while gritting his teeth.

I chuckled. “You can’t do that. He’s a powerful man too… besides, he’s not interested in me and he’s already married.”

Napaismid na lang si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. Mas lalo akong natawa. Agad naman akong tumayo saka yumakap sa kanya.

“He’s handsome but you’re the most handsome in my eyes.” I kissed his chin. “I love you.”

I smiled when his expression softened. He let out a heavy sigh and hugged me back.

“I love you too,” he muttered and kissed me.

He held both of my cheeks as he deepened our kiss. I responded to his lingering kiss and hugged his nape.

“Are you still mad?” I asked in between our kisses.

Napabuntonghininga si Xanthos saka pinagdikit ang noo naming dalawa.

“I can’t be mad at you, you know that.” He smiled at me.

“Now that you’re not mad anymore, we should go back to the party. I need to talk to my friend. Uuwi na rin tayo maya-maya… I’ll go ahead,” I said and gave him a soft kiss on his lips.

He sighed and nodded.

Binitiwan ko na ang kamay n’ya at akmang aalis na nang makita ko si Mom na nakatayo mula sa di kalayuan at tila hindi makapaniwalang nakatingin sa ’min.

Agad na nanlamig ang buong katawan ko.

“W-What’s the meaning of this, Kiara?” Mom asked. Her voice is shaking.

“M-Mom…” I don’t know what to say right now.

Xanthos held my hand and intertwined our fingers.

“There’s no point in denying it now, Kiara,” he muttered. “I’ll be by your side. Don’t be scared.”

His words didn’t ease the nervousness I feel right now… but it did help a bit and I appreciate it. Sadyang nangunguna lang ang kaba sa puso ko ngayon.

“Xanthos, I want to talk to Kiara alone. Please leave us alone,” Mom said in a cold tone while looking at me.

Xanthos didn’t listen to her and just held my hand. I sighed and looked at him. I gave him a reassuring smile.

“It’s fine, Xanthos. She’s still my Mom, please respect her,” I mumbled.

Xanthos sighed and nodded. “Okay. Text or call me if anything happens. I’ll be here right away.” He caressed my cheek.

Kahit labag sa loob ni Xanthos, napilitan siyang umalis at iwan kami ni Mom. Mas lalong bumigat ang pakiramdam ko nang umalis si Xanthos.

Kinakabahang napatingin ako kay Mom na walang emosyon na nakatingin sa ’kin. I don’t know what she’s thinking right now and that’s what scares me the most.

“You’re really a bitch… just like your mother.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi ni Mom. Pakiramdam ko tila binuhusan ako ng malamig na tubig… What does she mean by that?

“You ungrateful brat. I took care of you and treated you like my own daughter even though I don’t want it and this is what I get in return? You’re really cheap just like your real mother,” Mom said and shooked her head in disappointment.

“M-Mom, what are you saying? I don’t get you at all. Please explain it to me so I can understand,” I said. My lips are trembling, my hands are sweaty, and my knees are shaking.

“Xanthos is the only one I want after suffering for years from you and your asshole father. You don’t know how hard it is for me to take care of a cheap maid’s daughter for years. You took my freedom from me, and now Xanthos? You’re a bitch indeed. I’m not surprised, your Paula’s daughter after all.”

Naninikip ang dibdib ko habang pinapakinggan ang mga sinasabi ni Mom. Ayaw magproseso sa isip ko ng mga salitang binitiwan n’ya… o baka ayaw lang tanggapin ng sistema ko ang sinasabi n’ya.

“Y-You’re not my mother?” I asked. My vision became blurry because of tears pooling in my eyes.

Lumapit siya sa ’kin. She held my jaw tightly and made me face her.

“Look at me, Kiara. Hindi ka ba nagtataka? Wala ni isa ang nagsabi na magkamukha tayong dalawa.” Mom grinned. “You don’t know how I suffered all these years, Kiara. Hindi mo alam kung gaano kita gustong itulak palayo sa tuwing nakikita ko ang pagmumukha mo noon pa man. Naiinis ako na kinailangan kitang alagaan at ituring na anak kahit ayaw ko,” mariing sabi n’ya saka binitawan ako.

“M-Mom, I’m sorry for what I did. Y-You don’t have to go this far just because you’re mad at me. Stop lying, p-please.”

I can’t even talk properly right now because of my tightening chest. Even breathing feels painful. I know her words can’t be true. I’m her daughter… she’s my Mom.

“Why don’t you ask your father about Paula Carino? She’s our maid 24 years ago. Look for her and you’ll see how you resemble that bitch… She’s your real mother after all.”

Mom left me hanging here after saying those devastating words. My tears are flowing uncontrollably from my eyes. I can feel that my makeup is completely ruined right now but I couldn’t care less. My chest feels heavy, it’s so painful that I can’t even breathe properly.

I punched my chest and tried to calm myself but it didn’t help. My whole body is shaking and I couldn’t control my loud cries anymore. My chest feels heavy, it’s so hard to breathe. I feel like dying.

No, that can’t be true. Mom is just mad at me that’s why she said that. She’s my only mother, she’s my Mom and no one else. She’s lying. She’s just lying to me.

Naiyak pa rin na lumabas na ako ng hotel. Nanghihinang napaupo ako sa tabing kalsada at napatakip sa mukha ko. Hindi ko na napigilang mapahagulgol ng iyak.

I can feel some people looking at me right now but I don’t care about it anymore. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to believe… I just want this nightmare to end.

“Kiara.”

Natigilan ako nang marinig ang pamilyar na boses na ’yon. Napatingala ako at napatingin kay Xanthos na nakatitig sa ’kin ngayon.

“X-Xanthos,” naluluhang sabi ko.

Xanthos sat in front of me and wiped my tears. Hinubad n’ya rin ang blazer n’ya at pinasuot iyon sa ’kin.

“M-Mom said that I’m not her daughter… she said I’m someone else’s daughter. H-How could she say that just because she’s mad? I’m so mad at her too!”

Xanthos nodded while staring at me. “You should be.”

Napayakap ako sa sarili ko habang patuloy na umiiyak. Sobrang nakakasama ng loob. Alam kong mali ang ginawa ko kay Mom pero bakit umabot sa punto na kailangan n’yang magsinungaling nang gano’n?

Siya lang ang nanay ko, walang iba. Nagsisinungaling lang siya.

“Gusto mo bang lumayo muna tayo sa lahat?”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi ni Xanthos saka napatingin sa kanya.

“W-What do you mean?” I asked.

Xanthos caressed my cheek gently.

“Your mother was just mad that’s why she said ridiculous things. You should unwind first. We’ll talk to her again once she cooled down. Let’s stay away from everything for the meantime. How about that?” He held my hand and gently kissed it.

I bit my lower lip and nodded. That’s not a bad idea… everything is too much for me to take anyway.

• • • ~ ~ * * *

A/N:

Grr, excited na ’ko sa mga susunod na chapter 🤗🤗

Chapter Nineteen

“Where are we going, Xanthos?” I asked him when I finally calmed down a bit.

Xanthos held my hand and gently gripped it while driving. His eyes remained on the road. We’re currently in his car, trying to stay away from everything. Maybe this is really what I need right now.

“Where do you want to go?” He glanced at me. “I’ll take you wherever you want.”

I bit my lower lip and sighed. “I want somewhere near the sea,” I mumbled.

I always go to a private beach whenever I’m having a hard time. It makes me feel a little bit better. My hands are still shaking right now, the calm sea is what I need.

“I have a yacht, do you want us to go there?” he asked and kissed my hand. He loves doing that, I don’t know why.

Tipid na ngumiti ako saka tumango. That’s not a bad idea.

Tahimik na tumingin na lang ako sa mga nadadaanan naming gusali. Wala akong lakas na magsalita. Mukhang naiintindihan naman ni Xanthos ’yon dahil tahimik lang din siya sa tabi ko pero hinahawakan n’ya pa rin ang kamay ko na para bang pinapakalma n’ya ako kahit papa’no.

I just quietly waited for us to reach our destination. I badly want to text Abi to let her know I wasn’t at the party anymore but I don’t have strength to do so.

Makalipas ang halos kalahating oras na biyahe, nakarating din kami sa pupuntahan namin.

“Kiara, we’re here,” Xanthos announced when he stopped the engine.

Agad na lumabas ng kotse si Xanthos at pinagbuksan ako ng pinto. Agad n’yang hinawakan ang kamay ko na para bang inaalalayan ako. Tipid na ngumiti na lang ako sa kanya.

“Can you walk? Do you want me to carry you?” Xanthos asked.

I shook my head. “I can manage.”

Sinalubong kami ng lalaking sa tingin ko ay isa sa mga bodyguard ni Xanthos.

“Sir, ready na po ang yacht,” sabi ng lalaki.

Xanthos nodded. “Thank you.”

Napatingin ako sa malaking yacht na nasa harapan namin ngayon. It looks like a very expensive yacht. It’s also incredibly huge unlike the typical yachts that I’ve seen.

“Cerniah,” I murmured when I saw the name of his yacht.

Xanthos smiled at me. “Cerniah is my mother.”

I smiled at him too. He’s a sweet son.

Sumakay na kami sa yacht. Medyo kinakabahan ako dahil ito ang unang beses na nakasakay ako sa ganitong kalaking yate. Pero tila nawawala ang kaba ko sa tuwing pinipisil nang marahan ni Xanthos ang kamay ko.

“This won’t sink, right?” I asked him.

Xanthos let out a refreshing laugh. “Of course not, baby.” He kissed my forehead lightly.

Umakbay siya sa ’kin, yumakap naman ako sa baywang n’ya. Nararamdaman ko na kaagad ang malamig na hangin. Pasimple akong tumingin sa ibaba para makita ang dagat. Hindi ko na masyadong makita ang dagat dahil gabi na pero nagliliwanag ang dagat mula sa liwanag ng buwan. Ang ganda tingnan no’n, nakakakalma ng sistema.

“You can take a shower first, I have extra clothes here that you can wear,” Xanthos said and caressed my hair.

Xanthos guided me inside the yacht. There’s two rooms here and there’s also a bathroom. He prepared a shirt and shorts for me. He also ordered his secretary to buy underwear for me which I found uncomfortable but I just let him be. I need those anyway.

Hindi ko alam kung gaano katagal akong nag-stay sa bathroom. Pakiramdam ko inabot na ’ko ng mahigit dalawang oras. Napilitan lang akong tapusin at lumabas dahil nakailang katok na si Xanthos at mukhang nag-aalala na.

Nagbihis na ako ng damit na inihanda n’ya, si Xanthos naman ang sumunod na nag-shower kaya lumabas na muna ako ng silid para tingnan ang buwan at dagat. Halos sumakit na yata ang mga mata ko dahil sa pag-iyak. Hindi ko na maalala ang huling beses na umiyak ako nang ganito katindi. Hanggang ngayon nga ay mabigat pa rin ang dibdib ko.

I want to call Dad right now and ask him about that woman, Paula. But if I do that, it means I’m doubting myself as Akira North’s daughter. She’s my mother and no one else. I know she’s just mad that’s why she said that. I’m her daughter, I shouldn’t doubt that.

I was taken aback when I felt a warm embrace behind me. Amoy pa lang alam ko na kung sino ’yon. Tipid na napangiti na lang ako at napahawak sa braso ni Xanthos.

“You can tell me what’s bothering you. I can’t give you the help you need but I will listen to you and I won’t leave you.” He kissed my hair and hugged me tighter.

“Your presence is enough, Xanthos. Thank you for your efforts,” I mumbled.

Saglit kaming natahimik habang nakatitig sa dagat. Napapakalma ako ng dagat dagdag pa ang mainit na yakap ni Xanthos. Alam kong hindi ko matatakasan ang problema ko pero gaya ng sabi ni Xanthos, dapat ko munang ipahinga ang isip ko sa lahat at bumalik nang mas matatag.

Natigilan lang kami nang kumalam ang sikmura ko. Agad na nag-init ang mukha ko. Natatawang pinaharap naman ako ni Xanthos sa kanya.

“I think you should eat first, baby,” he muttered and kissed my lips.

Napaismid na lang ako saka tumango. Inakbayan na lang n’ya ako at muling iginiya pabalik sa loob. Hanga na talaga ako sa laki ng yacht na ’to. Mas malaki pa ang espasyo nito sa loob kaysa sa tinuluyan kong unit noon.

Nakarating kami sa dining area pero agad akong natigilan at napahawak sa damit ni Xanthos nang may makita akong lalaking nakain do’n.

“What the fuck are you doing here, Xceron?” nakakunot-noong tanong ni Xanthos.

“Eating… obviously,” tipid na sabi ng lalaki na tinawag ni Xanthos na Xceron.

I stared at the man intently. He looks like a slightly younger version of Xanthos. I blinked twice and stared at him again… don’t tell me he’s…

“He’s my younger brother, Xceron Archante,” Xanthos said.

I gulped and nodded. No wonder Xceron looks like him a lot. I think the only difference between them is their hair. Xceron is not curly-haired like Xanthos. I think Xanthos is a little bit taller than him. But it seems like he’s colder and more intimidating than Xanthos.

“H-Hello, Xceron. I’m Kiara North,” I said and smiled awkwardly at him.

Xceron didn’t say anything, he didn’t even look at me. I just sighed and bit my lower lip. It seems like he’s a rude guy.

“Xceron,” Xanthos said in a warning tone. I just held his arm and shook my head.

“It’s fine,” I mumbled and smiled at him.

“I’m done,” Xceron announced and immediately stood up.

Naiwan kaming dalawa ni Xanthos sa dining area. Napailing na lang si Xanthos at iginiya ako paupo sa upuan.

“I’m sorry about him. He’s worse than me when it comes to communicating with people. I’ll kick him out of this yacht later,” he said and caressed my hair.

I chuckled. “You can’t kick him out now.”

“Wala akong pakialam kahit malunod siya,” dagdag pa ni Xanthos.

Muli akong natawa at hinampas ang braso n’ya. “Baliw ka.”

Xanthos smiled and pinched my cheeks. He looks satisfied and happy seeing me laugh.

“I’ll cook for you. But you know that menudo is the only food I can cook, right?” he asked and scratched his nape.

“It’s fine. I really like your menudo.” I caressed his cheek and kissed his lips softly.

He held my hand and kissed it before he stood up and went to the kitchen counter. Napatitig na lang ako sa kanya habang nagsisimula na siyang magluto. Tipid na napangiti na lang ako. Maybe I should really attend a cooking class.

Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya buong oras habang nagluluto siya. Watching him cook is more entertaining than watching dramas.

Agad n’ya akong pinaghain matapos n’yang magluto. Napapangiti na lang ako habang pinapanood ang bawat kilos n’ya. Pakiramdam ko ang swerte ng magiging asawa n’ya.

Alam ko namang mahal namin ang isa’t isa ngayon pero hindi naman ibig sabihin no’n, kami pa rin sa huli. Maraming pwedeng mangyari… But of course, I’m hoping that he’s the one for me until the end because I can’t imagine myself with another man.

Umupo na ulit si Xanthos sa tabi ko matapos n’yang maghain. Agad kong tinikman ang niluto n’ya at napangiti na lang ako nang matikman ko ang masarap na lasa no’n. Natigilan lang ako nang humarang ang buhok ko sa mukha ko. Agad namang hinawi ni Xanthos ang buhok ko at inipit ’yon sa likod ng tainga ko.

“Do you want to eat to?” I asked and offered him my food.

“No, I’m good. Just eat,” he said and stared at me.

I just smiled and continued eating. I didn’t even realize that I was hungry earlier. This always happens when I’m stressed out. Palagi akong nalilipasan ng gutom. I’m weak when it comes to stress so I easily get depressed and disheartened. Mom knows it and she still lied to me like that and said something ridiculous. I’m so mad at her. How can she say that to her daughter.

I sighed and looked at Xanthos. He’s still staring at me. I just cleared my throat and wiped the side of my lips. I hope I don’t look like freakin’ mess right now. He’s staring at me intently, with emotions in his eyes that I couldn’t read. I just smiled at him and scratched my nape.

“Is there something on my face?” I asked.

Xanthos nodded.

I gasped and touched my cheeks. “Ano’ng meron sa mukha ko?”

“Perfect eyebrows and eyelashes, beautiful eyes, pointed nose, and tempting lips,” he said while staring at me.

Napasinghap na lang ako at napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya. Hindi ako prepared sa gano’ng atake n’ya. Bakit ba bigla na lang siyang nagpapakilig?

I just cleared my throat to look calm and unaffected even though my heart beats like crazy right now.

“T-Thank you. I know I’m beautiful,” nauutal na sabi ko na lang.

Natawa si Xanthos saka hinawakan ang kamay ko at dinampian ng halik ang likod ng palad ko. Napangiti na lang ako at hinayaan siya.

Xanthos really gives comfort to my heart in a way that no one can do.

PAGKATAPOS KONG kumain, tumambay ulit kami sa labas ni Xanthos. Nakahiga kaming pareho sa beach chair. Nakayakap siya sa ’kin habang nakaunan naman ako sa braso n’ya.

Napabuntonghininga ako habang nakatitig sa langit. Napapapikit na lang ako sa tuwing nararamdaman ko na hinahaplos ni Xanthos ang buhok ko.

“Xanthos, why are you so perfect? It feels like you’re way out of my league.” I looked at him.

Xanthos let out a sexy laugh. “What are you talking about? I still don’t deserve you. I have to work harder to prove my love for you… that’s what courtship means, right? I want to be worthy of your love,” he muttered and inhaled the scent of my hair.

I just closed my eyes and hugged him tighter. His embrace is the warmest place. The comfort it gives is enough to make me feel better. Being with him like this makes me forget all the things that caused me pain.

“Kiara, you make me forget all the grudge and wrath I feel inside. I told you before that your presence feels home… and it’s true. I really love your warmth and the feelings you make me feel,” he mumbled and kissed my temple.

I bit my lower lip while letting his words processed in my mind. I almost felt the chills within me as he said those words. I never heard something that sincere before. It makes my heart jump out of happiness.

“Xanthos, I love you… and I also love the feelings you make me feel,” I muttered and gave him a soft kiss on his cheek.

He smiled. “I love you more, Kiara.”

I just buried my face on his neck and tried to stop myself from crying. This moment warms my heart. I really want this moment and feelings to last forever.

XANTHOS REALLY helped me to unwind. Dalawang araw na kami sa yate na ’to at halos makalimutan ko ang lahat sa mga nagdaang araw. Nakikita ko minsan ang kapatid n’ya na si Xceron, pero tila wala naman itong pakialam sa presensya ko na mas ayos sa akin. Hindi ko rin naman siya madalas na makita.

“Wow, ngayon lang nagparamdam ang bruha.”

I just chuckled when I heard Abi’s voice on the other line. Nawala na sa isip ko ang tawagan siya simula ng umalis ako sa party ni Mom kaya malamang nag-alala talaga siya.

“I’m sorry, it’s just a lot of things happened. Ngayon ko lang din na-charge ’tong phone ko,” sabi ko na lang saka kumagat sa apple na kinakain ko.

“Why? What happened? Are you alright?”

Napangiti na lang ako sa sunod-sunod na tanong ni Abi sa kabilang linya. Naging seryoso rin ang boses n’ya. Alam n’ya rin kasi kung paano ako ma-stress.

“I’m fine, don’t worry.” I smiled even though she can’t see me right now.

“Are you sure?” paninigurado pa n’ya.

“Yes, I’m doing good right now.”

Matagal pa kaming nagkwentuhan ni Abi. Hindi ko na kinwento sa kanya ang tungkol sa ’min ni Mom dahil ayokong mag-alala pa siya lalo. Baka pati si Mom sugurin n’ya. Alam ko kung paano mainis si Abi dahil siya na talaga ang tagapagtanggol ko noon pa. She’s the only female friend that I love and trust. She’s like a sister to me.

Napatingin na lang ulit ako sa dagat matapos kong makipag-usap kay Abi. Nasa loob kasi si Xanthos at may inaasikaso. Naiintindihan ko naman dahil iniwan n’ya ang trabaho n’ya para lang mapagaan ang loob ko.

Natigilan ako nang tumunog ang phone ko. Agad kong sinagot ang tawag nang makita ko ang pangalan ni Manang Lanie sa caller ID.

“Hello po, bakit po kayo napatawag? Kumusta na po si Dad?” agad na tanong ko.

“Nako, Kiara. Bakit ngayon ka lang sumagot sa tawag? Alam mo bang nasa ospital ngayon ang Dad mo?”

Agad akong napatayo mula sa kinauupuan ko dahil sa sinabi ni manang. Agad na umakyat ang kaba sa dibdib ko.

“P-Po? Bakit po? Ano po ang nangyari?” kinakabahang tanong ko.

“Hindi ko masyadong naintindihan ang nangyari pero sa pagkakaalam ko, nanakaw ang pera n’yo sa bangko. Nabalitaan din namin na nasunog ang mga gusaling pag-aari n’yo kasama ang mga importanteng papeles. Hinimatay kahapon si Sir at nasa ospital siya ngayon.”

I closed my eyes tightly and tried to calm myself. What the hell am I doing? Dad needs me right now. Kailangan ko na siyang puntahan kaagad.

Dali dali akong nagtungo sa kwarto kung nasaan si Xanthos. Naabutan ko siya na may kausap sa phone. Agad naman siyang natigilan nang makita ako.

“I’ll talk to you later,” Xanthos said and ended the call. “Why Kiara? Is there a problem?”

“X-Xanthos, we need to go back. Dad is at the hospital right now. Nanakawan siya at nasunog ang mga properties na pag-aari n’ya. H-He’s suffering, he needs me right now so we need to go back,” I said with shaking voice.

Nanlalabo na rin ang mga mata ko dahil sa mga luha.

Lumapit sa ’kin si Xanthos at marahang pinahid ang mga luha ko.

“Stop crying…” he mumbled. “That motherfucker deserves it anyway.”

Pakiramdam ko binuhusan ako ng malamig na tubig dahil sa sinabi n’ya. Tama ba ako ng narinig?

“W-What are you saying all of a sudden, Xanthos?” I asked and held his hand.

“It’s not enough, Kiara. Your father needs to suffer more. He deserves the worst pain possible and I’ll give it to him. This is not enough. You see, I’m still being kind to him. He should be thankful. He doesn’t even deserve to die early. He should live longer and suffer at the palm of my hands,” Xanthos murmured while caressing my cheek.

“X-Xanthos, I don’t understand you at all.” My tears are now unstoppable. My whole body is trembling with unknown emotion. I don’t know what to feel right now. I’m so confused.

“Thank you for letting me use you.” Xanthos smirked. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure the love you gave me will be worth it… I’ll make good use of it, Kiara North.”

Chapter Twenty

“Xanthos… h-hindi kita maintindihan. A-Ano ba’ng sinasabi mo?”

I held his hand with my trembling one. A sob escaped from my lips. I don’t know what to feel right now. My whole body is trembling with emotions that are too much for my mind and heart to take.

“You’re so gullible, Kiara. No wonder Cadence easily fooled you.” He held my chin and gave me his coldest stare.

Pakiramdam ko hindi siya ang lalaking minahal ko. Hindi siya ang Xanthos na nakasama ko at nagpasaya sa ’kin… baka nananaginip lang ako ngayon.

He held my arm. “Cad is not the new chairman of NTC… it’s me.”

Mas lalong bumigat ang dibdib ko dahil sa sinabi n’ya. It feels like I need a break, my mind needs a break from all of this. Pakiramdam ko mas mabigat ang pakiramdam ko ngayon kaysa noong sinabi ni Mom na hindi n’ya ’ko anak.

Xanthos comforted me. He stayed with me and took care of me, I felt his love… it felt sincere. The words he said, the actions he did, the way he looked at me… all of it felt sincere that I never doubted those, not even once.

But why is he doing this? Bakit ngayon pa na patong patong ang iniisip ko?

“Y-You said you love me, it felt sincere… So why are you lying to me right now?” I don’t even have the energy to say all of the things I really want to say.

This is draining me. Xanthos is draining all my remaining strength until nothing left.

Tumalim ang tingin ni Xanthos sa ’kin. Napaigik na lang ako nang humigpit ang hawak n’ya sa braso ko. Napadaing ako at sinubukang alisin ang pagkakahawak n’ya ro’n pero masyado siyang malakas kumpara sa ’kin.

“Do you even see yourself in the mirror? This face…” He held my jaw tightly. “…this face looks like a replica Kairo North. This face reminds me of your asshole father. What? I love you? Don’t make me laugh,” he said in a sarcastic manner.

“B-Bakit ba galit na galit ka kay Dad? What did he do to you to deserve that hatred from you? I-I will try to understand,” I mumbled.

Napapikit ako nang mariin nang mas dumiin ang hawak n’ya sa braso ko na pakiramdam ko babaon na ang mga daliri n’ya ro’n.

“You don’t have to understand, Kiara. Just let me use you because I’m telling you… your father deserves it. It’s just a shame that your grandfather died early. I should have…” Bumigat ang paghinga ni Xanthos. Hindi rin nakawala sa paningin ko ang pamumula ng mga mata n’ya. Kitang kita ko ang matinding galit sa mga ’yon. “…I should have killed him myself. I should have tortured him to death. He doesn’t deserve a peaceful death.”

Hindi ko alam kung bakit mas lalo akong nanghina nang mapatingin ako sa mga mata n’ya. I never saw him this angry before. What weakens me more is the fact the anger and wrath in his eyes are matched with pain. Kitang kita ko sa mga mata n’ya ang sakit na itinatago n’ya sa ’kin.

What happened to him? What did my family do to him? I want to know… I want to understand him.

Binitiwan n’ya na ang braso ko. “Don’t try to understand me because you will never understand unless you experience it yourself,” he mumbled as his teeth gritted.

I held my arm and looked at him with tears pooling my eyes. Xanthos closed his eyes and clasped his chest as if he’s having a hard time to breathe.

“A-Are you alright?” I asked, stuttering.

Lalapit na sana ako sa kanya ngunit agad n’ya ’kong tinulak palayo. Napadaing na lang ako nang mawalan ako ng balanse at napaupo sa sahig.

“You good, bro?”

Natigilan ako at napatingin sa pinto. Nakatayo ro’n si Xceron habang nakapamulsa.

“It seems like you finally showed your fangs to that North girl,” Xceron coldly said and looked at me.

Muli akong tumingin kay Xanthos. Mukhang maayos na siya ngayon. Bahagya akong napaatras nang tumingin siya nang masama sa ’kin.

He squatted to meet my gaze. I gasped when he forcefully took my phone from me and put it in his pocket.

“Now, be a good girl, Kiara. You said before that you want me to be happy, right?” He caressed my hair. “I will only be happy if I see you and your father suffer and feel the worst pain possible… I’ll include you since you’re Kairo North’s number one weakness.”

Lumayo na siya sa ’kin saka lumabas ng kwarto, sumunod naman sa kanya si Xceron. Napasinghap ako nang isara nila ang pinto. Agad akong nagtungo ro’n at sinubukang buksan ang pinto pero naka-lock na ’yon.

Nanghihinang napaupo ako sa sahig at napayakap sa mga tuhod ko. I don’t know what’s happening anymore. This is too fast for my mind to process. I want to know why Xanthos is doing this… but my Dad, he’s at the hospital right now. He needs me right now… I don’t know what to do anymore.

Why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? The people I love… why are they causing me pain? Why them, of all people?

I DIDN’T EVEN realize that I fell asleep while crying. Sa sahig na rin ako nakatulog dahil na rin wala akong lakas na magtungo sa kama kanina.

I sat on the bed with my shaking knees and closed my eyes. My chest still feels heavy.

Napatingin ako sa namuong pasa sa braso ko dahil sa pagkakahawak ni Xanthos kanina. Napabuntong hininga ako at marahang hinawakan ’yon… this just made me realize that everything happened isn’t a dream… and I have to face it whether I like it or not.

Halos napatalon ako sa gulat nang bumukas ang pinto. Iniluwa no’n si Xanthos na may dalang plato. Lumapit siya sa ’kin at inabot ’yon.

“Eat,” he said.

“W-Wala akong gana,” sabi ko na lang saka napaiwas ng tingin.

I’m actually hungry right now… but I don’t want to eat. I don’t have the strength to do.

“Eat that if you still want to see your asshole father.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at nanginginig ang mga kamay na kinuha ang plato mula sa kanya.

Xanthos sat on the couch. I just bit the insides of my cheeks and avoided his gaze. Nagsimula na ’kong kumain. Medyo nahirapan pa ako dahil walang table pero hindi na lang ako nagsalita at tumuloy sa pagkain.

Nararamdaman kong nakatingin siya sa ’kin pero pinigilan ko ang sarili ko na tumingin din sa kanya.

What is he still doing here? Knowing his real agenda, it’s now uncomfortable to be watched by him while eating. I can’t read what he’s thinking… But whatever he’s thinking about me right now, I know it’s not good.

Tumayo na ako at lumapit kay Xanthos matapos kong kumain saka inabot sa kanya ang plato. Napalunok na lang ako nang makitang hawak n’ya ang phone ko. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at akmang babalik sa kama ko nang marinig ko siyang nagsalita.

“Hey, Kairo North.”

My eyes widened when I heard Dad’s name. I looked at him and it looks like he’s talking to my Dad through video call. What the heck is he planning to do?

“Where’s my daughter, Mr. Archante?! What did you do to my daughter?!”

I gasped when I heard Dad’s voice on the phone. My heart beats faster. Is he alright? Gusto kong malaman kung anong kalagayan ni Dad ngayon.

“Chill, old man. I’m not even starting yet. By the way, I told you not to tell this to the police. I mean, I know you know what will happen to your precious daughter if you do that. I don’t want distractions like them right now,” Xanthos said and looked at me.

“D-Dad…”

“What do you want? I doubt you need money from me. So tell me what the hell do you need from us?!”

I bit my lower lip. I’m worried about Dad. Paano kung lumala ang pakiramdam n’ya? Sabi ni manang nasa ospital siya. Baka makasama ’to lalo sa kanya.

Xanthos held my hand and pulled me. He made me kneel on the floor in front of him.

“Now, be a good girl. Let’s make your father lose his mind,” Xanthos murmured and took something from his behind.

My eyes widened when I saw him holding a gun. I gasped when he shoved the tip of the gun inside my mouth. Mas lalong umakyat ang kaba ko nang itapat n’ya sa ’kin ang camera.

“Kairo North, should I pull the trigger? I’m dying to do it right now,” Xanthos said in a cold tone.

“No! No, please! P-Please, Mr. Archante. I-I will do everything you want. Please don’t hurt my daughter, p-please, I’m begging you. Tell me what you want, I’ll do everything… Please let go of my daughter.”

Muling nag-alpasan ang mga luha mula sa mga mata ko nang marinig ko ang nagpa-panic na boses ni Dad. I don’t want him to see me in this situation. Ayokong palalain ang nararamdaman n’ya… pero mukhang iyon ang gustong mangyari ni Xanthos. Gusto n’yang makitang nagdurusa si Dad.

My body trembled more when he shoved the gun deeper. Xanthos smirked while staring at me.

“W-Why are you doing this to my daughter? Kung may kasalanan man ako… just punish me instead. H’wag mo ng idamay ang anak mo. N-Nagmamakaawa ako sa ’yo.”

Xanthos sighed and finally pulled the gun out of my mouth. Sumandal siya sa backrest ng couch habang malamig pa ring nakatitig sa ’kin.

“How dare you forget me, Kairo North? Don’t tell me you forgot about my mother too? You shouldn’t forget her. You should remember her for the rest of your life and suffer more than she did,” Xanthos said and pushed me away from him.

Muli n’yang itinapat ang camera n’ya sa kanya at siya na ngayon ang nakikita ni Dad.

“How dare you forget this face, asshole? This face should remind you of her… This face should remind you of Cerniah Dela Paz,” mariing sabi ni Xanthos.

Nakita ko kung paano namuti ang mga daliri n’ya sa higpit ng pagkakahawak n’ya sa phone.

Cerniah… it’s his mother. How is his mother related to my Dad?

“You… y-you’re Cerniah’s son?”

Kahit hindi ko nakikita si Dad, ramdam ko ang pagkagulat n’ya sa boses n’ya pa lang… Kung gano’n, kilala ni Dad ang nanay ni Xanthos.

Bumigat ang paghinga ni Xanthos. Napasinghap na lang ako nang nanggigigil na inihagis n’ya ang phone ko sa pader dahilan ng pagkabasag no’n.

“That asshole… I can’t even look at his face for that long. Damn him! I will kill him, I will fucking kill him!”

My body trembled when Xanthos looked at me. I can see a strong emotion in his eyes. His eyes… it’s full of hatred and pain. Pakiramdam ko nanunuot din sa pagkatao ko ang matinding galit sa mga mata n’ya.

“P-Please don’t kill my Dad, Xanthos. J-Just kill me instead, please,” I begged while tears are uncontrollably pooling my eyes, making everything I see blurry.

Xanthos held my arm and pulled me up. He looked at me with his intense eyes. My whole body weakened because of the intensity of his stare. His eyes alone are saying something that he can’t. His eyes are full of wrath. Why didn’t I realize it before? He doesn’t love me, he can’t love me because he’s blinded by hatred towards my family… I’m so naive.

“This is not the right time to kill you. I’ll kill you in front of your father. I will kill all his relatives until no one left. Then after that, I’ll give him a punishment worse than death. That is what I’m living for, Kiara. Not you or your petty love can make me happy. Your family’s downfall is the only thing I need to be happy.”

Pagkasabi n’ya no’n, agad n’ya rin akong binitiwan at iniwan sa kwartong ’to. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko at napahagulgol ng iyak.

I don’t know what to feel about him right now. I don’t even want to focus on it. There’s a lot of things running in my mind right now… Mom, Dad, Xanthos… I don’t know how to handle all of it in my mind. This is just too much for me. Bakit sabay-sabay nangyayari ang lahat ng ’to sa ’kin?

---

“Hmm…” Napahawak ako sa sentido ko. Ang sakit ng ulo ko.

Kahit nanghihina ako, pinilit kong bumangon. Kagaya kahapon, mukhang nakatulog na naman ako habang naiyak… at kagaya kahapon, nagising ako na hinihiling na sana panaginip na lang ang nangyari kahit na alam kong imposible.

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa pinto. Agad akong napatayo nang mapansing nakabukas ’yon. Dali dali akong lumabas ng kwarto. Ngunit napatigil ako nang maabutan ko sina Xanthos at Xceron na nakaupo mula sa di kalayuan… ngunit mas lalo akong natigilan nang makita ang secretary ni Xanthos na si Denise… nakaupo siya sa kandungan ni Xanthos at nakayakap sa batok nito.

I clasped my chest when it felt heavy again. I tried to calm myself while looking at them. I never thought that their relationship is like this… Maybe I really trusted Xanthos too much.

I’m gullible and foolish indeed.

“Hey, that North girl woke up,” Xceron said while looking at me.

Napatingin din sa ’kin sina Denise at Xanthos. Agad akong napaiwas ng tingin sa kanila.

“L-Let me go, Xanthos. I have to see my Dad. P-Please.”

Xanthos didn’t say anything. Nanatili siyang. Gusto ko siyang tingnan ngayon upang mabasa ang iniisip n’ya kahit papa’no. Napahawak na lang ako sa braso ko habang hindi pa rin makatingin sa kanya.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing naglalakad na si Xanthos papalapit sa ’kin. Napalunok ako at napatingin sa kanya nang nasa tapat ko na siya ngayon.

“Do you want to see your asshole father?” he asked and held my chin. He raised my chin and made me face him.

My whole body shivered when my eyes met his. His eyes… it looks different from before. The way he looks at me is different from before.

“If you really want to see you father that bad… Why don’t you jump out of this yacht and swim all your way to him?” he said in a cold tone that I almost hugged myself.

Muling nanlabo ang paningin ko dahil sa mga luhang nagbabadyang kumawala mula sa mga mata ko. Nanginginig ang mga kamay na inalis ko ang pagkakahawak n’ya sa ’kin.

“W-Why are you being like this to me? H-Hindi… hindi mo ba talaga ako minahal?”

Nanatiling walang emosyon na nakatingin sa ’kin si Xanthos na tila ba hindi siya apektado na lumuluha ako sa harapan n’ya.

“You’re really foolish, Kiara North… After all I did, you still managed to ask that stupid question… Well, I don’t love you, Kiara. I didn’t even like you, not even a second. You don’t know how much I hated myself every time we kiss… You’re Kairo North’s daughter… I’ll never love you.”

His words are like daggers that shot my heart a hundred times. I never thought someone’s words will hurt me like this. He’s not even a family member… but the fact that I love him so much… makes his words more painful than any physical pain.

Napatungo na lang ako at bahagyang napaatras habang patuloy na lumuluha.

Nanginginig ang buong katawan na tumakbo ako palayo sa kanya at nagtungo sa railings ng yate. Hindi na ako nakapag-isip nang ayos. Agad akong sumampa ro’n.

“What the hell is she planning to do?” Narinig kong tanong ni Xceron.

Napapikit ako at agad na tumalon sa dagat… Desperada na ’ko, gagawin ko ang lahat kahit ang magpakalunod makaalis lang sa poder ni Xanthos.

I just can’t take the pain anymore… I can’t be with him anymore.

Chapter Twenty-One

Xanthos Archante

“Akira Montreal North?” I asked and held my chin.

What a perfect timing.

“Yeah, you know who she is, right? She’s Kairo North’s wife,” Xceron said and crossed his arms. “What are you planning to do now?”

I smirked while looking at Akira North from the ground floor who’s currently talking to one of my employees. She’ll be the representative of NTC. This will be the perfect opportunity.

“I’ll start with her. She’s not in good terms with her Kairo, right?” I asked. Xceron nodded.

“Yeah, based on Cadence… They’re on verge of divorcing. What they have was just a marriage of convenience after all.”

Akira North…

I didn’t take my eyes off Akira during the meeting. She seems professional, she’s a Montreal after all. I sighed and played with my pen. I need to follow my plan, if anything goes wrong. I don’t have a choice but to kill her.

“Mrs. North,” I called her when we’re the only ones left in the meeting room.

She looked at me with uneasy eyes. She seems uncomfortable with my presence.

“You did a great job earlier,” I said and smiled at her.

Akira gave me a shy smile. “Thank you.”

“Why don’t we talk about your proposal more? Let’s have a dinner together,” I said and sat on the table, near her.

Damn, I just hope this will work.

Akira looked at me with widened eyes. I just smiled at her, waiting for her answer. I did my best to hid my smirk when her face reddened. I knew it, someone like her who was stucked at a loveless marriage is still looking for love. She just made my plan easier.

“Your husband is the worst,” I said and sipped on my wine while staring at her.

I actually didn’t listen that much at her gibberish the whole time. I need to play a gentleman role here even though I don’t want to.

Akira sighed. “I just want to end everything with him.”

I held her hand on top of the table. She was taken aback and looked at me with widened eyes. I smiled at her and stared directly at her eyes.

“Do you need my help? I’ll help you in any ways I can,” I said, I did my best to sound sincere as much as possible.

“W-What are you doing to a married woman, Mr. Archante?” she asked nervously. She took her hand from me and avoided my gaze.

“Married woman? Your husband never treated you like one. Why don’t you just leave him?” I leaned my back while staring at her intently.

“Even though I want to, I can’t do that just like that.” She let out a heavy sigh.

I know she’d say that. Montreal Corp. is surviving because of Kairo North’s help and connection. Montreal will not survive the business world once they ended their marriage.

“I told you earlier that I’ll help you, right? You’re the sole owner of Montreal, everything must be too much for you to handle.” I smiled at her. “I’ll help you, I will help Montreal Corp. so that you won’t need NTC or Kairo North’s help anymore.”

Natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. I did my best not to smile devilishly while staring at her. She seems tempted. Kahit tanggapin n’ya ang alok ko, walang kokontra sa kanya. She’s the sole owner of Montreal Corp. now. I purposely waited for this opportunity to happen, I won’t let this slide.

“W-Why are you doing this just to help me?” she asked.

I leaned closer to her and smiled. “Because we want the same thing, Akira Montreal. We both want to ruin Kairo North’s life, right?”

She became more uneasy. I can read what she’s thinking right now just based on her actions. I know how much Akira hated Kairo North. Her marriage with him took her freedom and besides, she had to take care of Kairo’s daughter with someone else. That’s a really big insult to her but she couldn’t do anything since she needs Kairo the most.

“And besides… it’s such a waste to let a beauty like you remained by his side forever. You deserve better, Akira.” I held her hand again and this time, she just let me hold her hand.

“What do you mean?” she asked and finally looked at me too.

“I’m interested in you, Akira,” I lied. Lying and pretending couldn’t be helped if I want to reach my goal.

Her face reddened even more. “W-Why? I’m like… ten years older than you.”

“Does that matter? I don’t care about things like that and besides… you’re still beautiful, you’re even more beautiful than your daughter,” I said even though I haven’t seen Kairo’s daughter yet.

Her eyes widened and looked at me with disbelief… Bullseye. Cadence was right. Akira’s number one insecurity is Kairo North’s daughter.

I started planning everything with Akira after she fell in my trap. It seems like she really hated Kairo and his daughter, it helped me a lot. She gave me access on Kairo’s funds and properties. She gave me more information more than Cad can give.

But it seems like she really fell in love with me which I find irritating. I just need to be patient. I’ll dump her after I get her company shares on NTC. I just need to wait more.

But Kairo North’s daughter, Kiara Amaris North came into the picture at the perfect timing. I saw her for the first time at Cad’s bar. She’s different from Akira. She’s a wild young girl. She always looks happy… I hate it. Kairo North’s daughter doesn’t deserve to be this happy. I’ll make sure that I will turn her smiles and laughs into misery and suffering.

I still remember how hard I brushed my teeth after kissing her for the first time. I fucking hate her too, not the way I hate Kairo… but I hate Kiara Amaris too. I just hate everything about Kairo North.

“Xanthos… what are you planning to do with Kiara?”

I stopped typing on my laptop and looked at Cadence. I sighed and removed my eyeglasses.

“Of course I’ll make her suffer too. Why are you suddenly asking that?” I asked. This is not like him. Cad doesn’t give a fuck about other people.

“Can’t you just let her be? I know what Kairo North did to you is unforgivable… but Kiara is innocent. Wala siyang kinalaman do’n at hindi dapat siya madamay. If you just get to know her, you’ll see that she’s different from Kairo and Aldovino North,” Cad explained.

I smirked and touched my bottom lip. “Do you like her, Cad?”

Hindi nakasagot si Cad sa tanong ko. I just shrugged and let out a heavy sigh.

“Just forget your petty feelings about her as I’m gonna ruin her life, Cad. Not even you can stop me.” My voice became serious.

Cadence remained silent. I know he’s contemplating his feelings right now… but I know he’ll choose money until the end. No woman can change him. That’s the same case for me. No one can stop me reaching my only goal… not even petty love and disgusting feelings can stop me.

Cadence sighed. “You better pay me thrice for this,” Cad said before he left.

Everything is going well according to my plan. And as I get to know Kiara Amaris… I realized Cad was right. She’s really kind and sweet… but her kindness and her feelings didn’t reach the hatred in my heart. I don’t give a fuck about her or her feelings. I’ll just use her feelings to my advantage.

’Your parents must have taught you to be a good man as you are right now.“ Kiara gave me an innocent smile.

“My mother taught me to be a perfect man,” I muttered. I intertwined our fingers and kissed the back of her hand even though it disgusts me.

“W-where is she now?”

“She left me,” I said with a heavy heart. “She’s an irresponsible woman who left her responsibility as a mother,” I lied.

Yeah, she left me. She’s an irresponsible woman… She shouldn’t have left us. She shouldn’t have left me and my brother like this… fucked up and beyond repair. But it’s not her fault… It’s their fault, and I will never forget them for doing that to my mother.

I ended up everything with Akira after buying her shares.

“Why are you breaking up with me, Xanthos? I-I thought–”

“Akira…” I held her shoulder. “…I have priorities. I don’t have time for this. We can still remain as friends if you want. Once I’m done with everything, we can go back together. Okay?”

Akira just nodded and hugged me. I sighed and hugged her back.

Sorry but that will never happen.

Kiara isn’t Akira’s daughter but she’s just as gullible as she is. She’s innocent and trusts people easily. How can someone like her managed to survive in this cruel world?

“My relationship with your Mom is purely for our both gains only. Ginamit n’ya ’ko para makawala sa tatay mo. I used her because she promised she’ll sell me her shares in North Technologies Corp. that I desperately need… Falling in love is not included in our agreement… but she just confessed that she fell in love with me. That’s why I broke up with her.” Even though the fact that I just used Akira is right, some of it are lies.

Of course I won’t tell her that Akira and I had a real relationship… I don’t know if it’s even right to call it ‘real relationship’ though, I just acted like his boyfriend in front of Kiara. It was obvious that I’m just using her but Akira just let me be. She must really like me that much.

“So… are you telling me that you and my Mom weren’t in a relationship in the first place? B-But why did you act like you really love her? You even tried to follow her on her business trip?” Kiara asked in confusion.

“Well, nothing… just to make it kinda realistic, and besides, you’re also not part of our agreement. I tried my best to resist you and your advances but damn, I lost. You’re truly irresistible,” I said with a smile on my lips.

I didn’t expect her to believe that. But damn, luck must be with me because of Kiara. She just made my plan easier. Kiara is Kairo North’s greatest downfall, I can’t just let her be.

“You seem to be enjoying your time with that North girl, Xanthos,” Xceron said and sipped on his wine.

I glared at him. “I want to end my shitty time with her but I can’t just do that. I have to fully gain her trust.”

“Really? I hope you’re not falling in love with her or something. I want to remind you what kind of blood flows in her veins,” Xceron warned me. I just laughed and shook my head.

“Where did you get that stupid thought? That won’t happen.”

I can’t even look at Kiara without remembering his father, how can I fall for that woman?

“I love you.”

I did my best not to smile when Kiara said those words. I’m happy not because she loves me… I’m happy because I can finally go through my plan completely. She fully trusts me now, nothing can stop me now. I should just have to make her more attached to me so that she won’t be able to turn back.

“Wala ka ba talagang feelings kay Kiara? Kahit konti?”

Tiningnan ko nang masama si Cadence. He just sighed and scratched his nape.

“Damn, how can you not like her? Are you a monster or something?” Cad mumbled.

“That woman’s family made me a monster, Cadence.” I gritted my teeth.

I don’t feel anything at all. I just want to reach my only goal… the only thing that I’m living for. I survived all these years just for that. Pati pagkatao at emosyon ko inalis ko na para lang mangyari ’to. I can even die right after I reach my goal. I just don’t care about everything anymore. I just want to see Kairo North at his lowest. I want to see him suffer as I take his loved ones and make them suffer in front of him. After that, I’ll give him the worst death possible.

That’s why loving someone is impossible for me. I will never be saved, I will never change myself and my goal. I lived as a monster and I will die like one until the end.

“I didn’t know you’re hooking up with Kiara,” Akira said and crossed her arms.

I puffed my cigarette and smiled at her. “You lost your cool, Akira. Why did you suddenly admit she’s not your daughter?” I smirked. “But well, thanks to that, you just made my plan easier.”

“What are you planning to do with her?” Akira asked.

“Why? Are you worried about her?”

Akira rolled her eyes. “You can use her, do whatever you want… for all I care,” she said as if Kiara was just nothing to her.

Can’t blame her, Kiara isn’t her daughter after all. But she still took care of her… Akira is heartless indeed.

I took advantage of Kiara’s vulnerable state and took her. She depended on me more, it seems like she didn’t even doubt my intentions. How can she be so trusting? But well, that’s not my problem and her innocence helped me a lot. She also seems a kind of person who easily gets disheartened.

“Y-You said you love me, it felt sincere… So why are you lying to me right now?”

I find Kiara’s crying face so satisfying. I hope Kairo is seeing how messed up his daughter is right now… and did she just say it felt sincere? She’s really stupid indeed. I never showed sincere feelings for her. I removed that kind of feeling from myself a long time ago. I made myself like this because I don’t like hindrances like foolish feelings and emotions.

“You’re being a softie, Xanthos. You’re torturing that North girl mentally but not physically. That’s new,” Xceron said.

I glared at him. “Stop giving meanings to everything I do to her.”

“Then why aren’t you hurting her, I mean… physically? The Xanthos I knew won’t give a fuck even if she’s a woman,” Xceron said, challenging me.

“Mental torture will be more painful for someone like her,” I said and just looked at the calm sea.

“Oh, really?” Xceron said, it sounded like he’s still doubting me.

Hindi na lang ako nagsalita. Whatever he’s thinking right now won’t happen… He should stop watching romance stuff. It won’t happen in real life, it won’t happen especially to me.

“Sir, why did you call me?” my secretary, Denise, asked.

I was about to tell her to take care of my paper works for awhile but I saw Kiara coming out of her room. I pulled Denise and made her sit on my lap. I heard Xceron whistled beside me.

“Sir?” Denise asked, she seems clueless.

“Hug me, I’ll pay you for that,” I murmured.

Denise immediately hugged my nape. Denise is just like Cadence. She loves money more than everything.

I was satisfied when Kiara saw us. I know she truly loves me. I want to torment her more using her feelings for me. I don’t care even if she’s innocent about everything that her family did. She’s still Kairo’s daughter. She’s no exception. She will face my wrath too.

“W-Why are you being like this to me? H-Hindi… hindi mo ba talaga ako minahal?”

Her eyes are pooling with tears as she asked that. Seeing her like this is so satisfying. I’ll make sure Kairo’s loved ones will suffer more than this. I’ll make them lose their minds.

“What the hell is she planning to do?”

Natigilan kami nang biglang tumalon si Kiara sa dagat. Xceron immediately stood up and looked for her. I stood up too and put my right hand in my pocket. Lumapit ako sa railings para silipin si Kiara. What the hell is that woman thinking?

“Damn, Xanthos. Why aren’t you doing anything? We still need her.”

Xceron jumped out of water too to save Kiara. I remained emotionless while looking at her, struggling on water. I just don’t feel anything at all. All I feel right now is hatred. The only emotion that I need right now is hatred, I don’t need any feelings other than that as I don’t want distractions.

I won’t let Kiara and her feelings distract me.

Chapter Twenty-Two

“Hmm…” I groaned and opened my eyes slowly.

My head feels heavy and my whole body is trembling unconsciously. I sighed and closed my eyes again, trying to remember what happened before this. I just bit my lower lip when I remembered that I suddenly jumped out of the water. Why am I here in this room again? Did Xanthos save me?

I just shook my head. Nah, it’s impossible.

“Kiara.”

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa tumawag sa ’kin. Lumapit sa ’kin si Denise at inabutan ako ng mangkok. Hindi ako nagsalita at tumingin lang sa kanya.

“Try this soup para mabawasan ’yung lamig na nararamdaman mo,” sabi n’ya saka umupo sa tabi ko.

Bumangon ako at kinuha sa kanya ’yon ngunit hindi ako nagsalita. Iba na ang suot kong damit at tuyo na rin ako pero pakiramdam ko nilalamig pa rin ako. Kahit ayaw kong tumanggap ng tulong sa kanya, ayaw makisama ng katawan ko.

“I’m sorry about what happened. Sir Xanthos and I aren’t in a relationship. Bukod sa hindi ko siya type, inutusan n’ya lang ako na gawin ’yon. Sorry, hindi ako makatanggi sa pera,” sabi na lang n’ya saka napakamot sa batok n’ya.

I just stared at her. I don’t want to trust her words. Halos lahat ng tao sa paligid ko ay niloko lang ako dahil masyado akong mabilis mapaniwala… si Cadence, si Mom, at si Xanthos. Ayoko ng magpauto ulit sa kahit sino. I know I don’t have any pride left in me, but I’ll do my best to regain it.

My love for him will fade… but I shouldn’t let my self-love fade too.

“Nakakainis talaga si Sir Xanthos, obvious naman na may feelings siya para sa ’yo pero todo deny siya sa sarili n’ya. Puro siya revenge revenge, feeling n’ya yata nasa movie siya o wattpad story. Gigil n’ya ’ko talaga. Kung ako sa’yo, tataguan ko ’yon ng anak,” sunod-sunod na sabi ni Denise.

Napakunot na lang ang noo ko. I didn’t know na ganito pala siya kadaldal.

“W-Wala kaming anak,” sabi ko na lang habang nagtatakang nakatingin pa rin sa kanya.

“Eh? Malay mo buntis ka pala tapos syempre siya ang tatay. Kapag gano’n ang nangyari, pumunta ka sa ibang bansa tapos palakihin mo ang anak n’yo nang hindi alam ni Sir Xanthos. Tapos maghanap ka na rin ng ibang boyfriend, ’yung pogi rin saka mayaman para kapag nagkita uit kayo ni Sir, magselos siya nang sobra. Tapos makikita n’ya na kamukha n’ya ’yung tinagong mong anak at hahabulin ka n’ya pero hindi ka na babalik. Hay! Deserve n’ya talaga Witaguan ng anak, promise. Gago siya, legit na gago. Kung ’di lang talaga siya mayaman, malamang matagal na ’kong nag-resign,” napapailing na dagdag pa ni Denise.

Hindi ko alam kung anong movie ang pinanood n’ya at ganyang kalawak ang imagination n’ya. Napailing na lang ako at muling humigop ng soup.

“Kiara, do you want me to kick his ass?” Denise asked, her face looks serious.

My forehead creased. “W-What the hell are you saying?”

“Basta bayaran mo ’ko, sisipain ko si Sir.”

I bit my lower lip to stop myself from smiling. I never thought that Denise has a cute personality like this. She looks like a professional secretary every time I see her but now, she doesn’t act like one. She acts like a close friend or something right now.

“I don’t have money with me,” I said and chuckled.

“Ay shet, ang ganda mo tumawa, Kiara. Medyo crush na kita.” Kinurot n’ya ang pisngi ko. “Kaya talagang sure ako na may feelings sa ’yo si Sir Xanthos kasi kanina hindi maalis ’yung tingin n’ya sa ’yo habang wala kang malay tapos–”

“Denise, gusto mong isumbong kita kay Xanthos?”

Natigilan lang si Denise nang biglang sumulpot si Xceron. Napairap siya at napakamot sa batok n’ya.

“Badtrip amputa, wrong timing,” bulong pa ni Denise.

Xceron smiled and leaned his back on the wall. I think this is the first time I saw him smile.

“Are you saying something, Denise?” Xceron asked and raised an eyebrow.

“Wala po, Sir. Ang sabi ko po h’wag assumera si Kiara dahil walang feelings sa kanya si Sir Xanthos at h’wag n’yang taguan ng anak si Sir kung sakaling buntis siya kagaya ng sa wattpad,” sunod-sunod na sabi ni Denise saka dali-daling tumayo.

Napailing na lang ako nang agad na kumaripas ng alis si Denise sa kwarto. Kami na lang ang naiwan ni Xceron.

“Are you okay now, North girl?” Xceron asked and sat on the couch.

My forehead furrowed. “Please just call me Kiara.”

Xceron nodded. “Okay, North girl.”

I just bit my lower lip to control my temper. I suddenly want to kick his ass instead of Xanthos’ right now.

“Don’t worry, I’ll find a way to get you out of here,” he said and crossed his arms.

Confusion filled my eyes. “Bakit mo ’ko tutulungan?”

Xceron shrugged. “Labas ka sa galit ko. I want to kill your father right now but you’re not him,” he said.

Saglit akong natahimik, wala akong balak paniwalaan ang sinabi n’ya o pagkatiwalaan siya pero sa ngayon wala akong magagawa kundi ang pakinggan siya.

“Xanthos doesn’t think the same way,” I muttered and avoided his gaze.

“Xanthos’ case is different, North girl. He saw everything with his own eyes. He saw something tragic at a young age that your father and grandfather caused. I can’t do anything about his rage and hatred. I want to make your father suffer too but Xanthos… he’s too blinded by it. To be honest, I just want to kill your father immediately because I want Xanthos to be free.” He sighed and leaned his back on the backrest.

“A-Ano ba’ng ginawa nila sa inyo? Ano’ng ginawa ni Dad at ng lolo ko para magkaganito kayo?”

Hindi sumagot si Xceron at seryosong tumingin sa ’kin.

“Mas maganda kung hindi mo na lang alam. Just forget everything about Xanthos once you escaped here. You’ll live better if you don’t know. Trust me,” he said in a serious tone.

I bit my lower lip and gripped the spoon on my hand. I really want to know everything. I don’t want to remain clueless forever. I won’t be able to live normally again after this anyway. Why can’t he just tell me about it?

Galit ako kay Xanthos ngayon, galit na galit ako sa kanya pero gusto ko pa ring malaman ang dahilan kung bakit n’ya ginagawa ’to. Ayokong magalit sa kanya nang walang alam… gusto kong magalit sa kanya na alam ko ang dahilan n’ya.

“We’re killers, North girl. We blindly killed a lot of people to get here. But Xanthos did a lot of things that are even too much for you to imagine to get here. He lost himself in the process… Do you think he’s a monster?”

Hindi ako nakasagot sa tanong n’ya.

“Yes, he’s a monster, North girl… but I don’t need that heartless monster, I just need my brother back.”

I can feel the sadness in Xceron’s voice. I don’t want to trust him or his words because Xanthos seems sincere too when he fooled me. But Xceron looks like he’s really yearning for his brother.

“Kainin mo na ’yan bago lumamig,” pag-iiba ni Xceron sa usapan saka itinuro ang mangkok na hawak ko. Napatikhim na lang ako saka tumango.

Ang daming tumatakbo sa isip ko ngayon. Ang dami kong gustong malaman, pero natatakot ako na baka hindi ko kayanin ang malalaman ko.

---

“Why are you here again?”

Ngumiti nang matamis si Denise sa ’kin saka nag-peace sign. Natigilan na lang ako nang basta na lang siya humiga sa tabi ko.

“Hayaan mo siya, busy sina Sir Xanthos sa pag-e-emote sa labas. Saka nabo-boringan na kaya ako sa pagmumukha ni Sir. Nakakaurat kaya siya, pakipot pa eh halata namang gusto ka n’yang kumustahin. Pa-epal siya, wala siyang bayag,” bulong ni Denise saka basta na lang nagkumot.

“I really didn’t expect that you’re like this,” I said and bit my lower lip, suppressing my laugh.

“Iba ako sa work siyempre. Pero ganito talaga personality ko, typical makulit girl na na-fall sa cold na bad boy tapos sinandal sa locker at na-bully pero na-fall sa ’kin ’yung bully at naghabol siya sa ’kin.”

Tuluyan na ’kong natawa sa sinabi n’ya. Here we go again with her out of this world imagination.

“You should be a writer, Denise.”

“Writer naman kaya talaga ako. Search mo sa wattpad ’yung elyjindria. Ako ’yon, marami na ’kong followers, 66k na pero humble pa rin ako. May bashers din ako pero putangina nila.”

Muli akong natawa sa sinabi n’ya. Sobrang kulit n’ya talaga.

“Ang ganda mo talaga, Kiara. Parang nafa-fall na rin ako sa ’yo. Sana ako na lang makatuluyan mo,” sabi n’ya saka napabuntonghininga.

“Pwede rin,” natatawang sabi ko na lang.

“Luh, pa-fall ka kamo. Hindi ’yan tama.” Napailing siya. “Ay teka, gusto mo bang tawagan si Mr. North? Dala ko ’yung cellphone ko,” sabi n’ya saka ipinakita ang phone na dala n’ya.

Pakiramdam ko literal na nangislap ang mga mata ko nang makita ang phone n’ya. Agad n’ya namang inabot ’yon sa ’kin.

“Is it okay, Denise? Baka malaman ’to ni Xanthos?” nag-aalalang tanong ko.

“Hindi ’yan. Kapag nahuli tayo edi babatukan ko na lang siya tapos magkakaroon siya ng amnesia tapos mai-in love na naman siya sa ’yo kahit wala siyang alaala tapos–”

Hindi ko na pinakinggan ang mga sunod na sinabi ni Denise. I immediately dialed Dad’s number and called him. I’m so worried about him. I just hope he’s doing fine even though it’s impossible. I know he’s worried as hell about me right now.

“Hello?” My body trembled when I heard Dad’s voice. His voice sounded weak that I almost didn’t hear it.

“H-Hello, Dad?”

“Kiara? Kiara! Is that you, darling?!” tila nagkaroon ng buhay ang boses ni Dad.

“Dad, h’wag n’yo po ako masyadong isipin. Please take care of your self, Dad. I’m so worried about you,” naluluhang sabi ko.

“How can I not worry about you? Where are you now? Is he hurting you? Please tell me where you are right now, Kiara. Pupuntahan kita kahit saan pa ’yan,” puno ng pag-aalalang sabi ni Dad.

“I’m fine, Dad. Don’t worry, h-he won’t hurt me again. He just did that to scare you so please stop worrying about me and take care of yourself,” I said. I did my best not to stutter. I don’t want him to worry about me any longer. His health can’t handle too much stress.

“Kiara, please tell me where you are. Hindi ako mapapalagay hangga’t wala ka rito, anak.”

I sighed. “Don’t worry, Dad. Pauwi na ’ko, stop stressing yourself over this, please. Malapit na ’kong umuwi.” Agad ko na ring binaba ang tawag pagkasabi ko no’n saka muling ibinalik ang phone ni Denise sa kanya.

Sa ngayon, wala akong ibang choice kundi ang panghawakan ang sinabi ni Xceron. Hindi ko rin alam kung may magagawa ako dahil hindi ko alam kung nasaan kami ngayon.

“Sabihin mo lang sa ’kin kung kailangan mong makitawag ulit. Pwede namang ipa-track ng Dad mo ang tawag natin para malaman ang location natin. Kahit ako kasi, hindi ko alam kung nasaan tayo ngayon. Lakas kasi ng amats ni Sir Xanthos. Mabaog sana siya, pero h’wag pala kasi tataguan mo pa siya ng anak,” sabi ni Denise saka hinampas ang braso ko.

Napangiti na lang ako sa sinabi n’ya.

“By the way, kung gusto mo lumabas, pwede na. Hindi na pinapa-lock ni Sir Xanthos siraulo ’yung pinto. Talon ka ulit sa dagat hehe,” tila nang-aasar na sabi n’ya.

I glared at her and threw her a pillow. “Nang-aasar ka ba?”

MATAGAL DIN kaming nagkulitan ni Denise. I remember Abi in her, mas makulit at mas madaldal lang siguro na version ni Abi.

Natigilan si Denise at napatingin sa phone n’ya.

“Ay punyemas. Bye na muna, Kiara my crush. Tinatawag ako ni Sir Xceron. Ang kapal ng mukha n’ya, si Sir Xanthos kaya ang nagpapasweldo sa ’kin,” paghihimutok n’ya.

Naiwan ulit ako nang umalis siya. Napatingin ako sa nakabukas na pinto. Ayos lang ba talaga kung lalabas ako saglit?

I shook my head and took a jacket and wore it before heading out. I immediately hugged myself when I felt the cold breeze despite wearing a jacket… but I was taken aback when I saw Xanthos sitting on a beach chair while drinking his wine.

Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya at lumapit sa railings upang tumingin sa dagat. Napahawak ako sa railing nang maramdaman kong nakatingin si Xanthos sa direksyon ko.

Pinakikiramdaman ko na lang siya habang nakatingin sa dagat. Hindi ko alam kung ano’ng nararamdaman ko sa mga oras na ’to… alam kong galit ako sa kanya ngayon, pero may parte sa ’kin na gustong malaman ang nangyari sa kanya… kung bakit siya nagkaganito.

I glanced at him. He’s not looking at me anymore. Sa langit naman siya nakatingin. Pamilyar sa ’kin ang emosyon sa mga mata n’ya ngayon. Ganitong ganito rin noong una ko siyang nakita na nakatingin sa langit… He’s looking at the sky with melancholic eyes.

Muli akong tumingin sa dagat. I’m still weeping inside. How come he didn’t love me at all? How come he didn’t feel comfort with me just like how I felt with him? How come I didn’t reach his heart just like how he reached mine?

I bit my lower lip to suppress my tears. I thought I can get over him easily. I thought I just need to realize my worth and I’ll get over it eventually. But maybe he took all the love I have in my heart with him and crushed it. He doesn’t care about it at all… or maybe I’m not worthy of his love.

I tried to calm my heart when my vision became blurry because of tears. I didn’t know that loving someone can make you doubt yourself and make you lose the confidence you built for yourself… Loving Xanthos is so painful. Loving someone with pure hatred in his heart is painful indeed.

“Xanthos, are you still not telling to North girl where we’re heading?”

Natigilan ako at napatingin kay Xceron nang marinig ko ang boses n’ya. Nasa tabi siya ngayon ni Xanthos.

Hindi naman sumagot si Xanthos.

“North girl, ibabalik ka na namin sa inyo,” sabi ni Xceron saka kinindatan ako.

Xceron is kinder than I thought. Akala ko noong una mas intimidating at mas nakakatakot siya kaysa kay Xanthos. Mukhang akala ko lang ’yon.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Wala siyang sinabi. Nakatingin lang siya sa dagat habang nainom ng wine. Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya.

Why did he suddenly change his mind? What is he up to? Does he had a change of heart of is he just planning something? I don’t know what he’s thinking. His mood swings are second to no one.

Hindi na lang din ako nagsalita. Masaya ako na makakabalik na ako kay Dad at makikita ko na siya pero hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit may nararamdaman pa ’kong kakaiba na hindi ko maipaliwanag.

Saglit pa kaming naghintay at nakarating na rin kami sa pinanggalingan namin. Pakiramdam ko ang tagal kong nanatili sa yate na ’yon dahil sa dami ng nangyari.

“Hey, North girl. What are you waiting for? Let’s go,” sabi ni Xceron.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ako makahakbang paalis. Nanatili akong nakatingin kay Xanthos na nakaupo pa rin at hindi ako binabalingan ng tingin.

Huminga ako nang malalim at lumapit sa kanya. He finally looked at me, but his eyes are still emotionless.

“I don’t know why you’re doing this. I know you have a reason. Whatever my father had done to you, I won’t apologize for it because I know I’m not involved. You shouldn’t–”

Natigilan ako sa sasabihin ko nang tumayo si Xanthos. Napasinghap na lang ako nang kwelyuhan n’ya ako saka matalim na tumingin sa ’kin.

“Just leave before I change my mind, Kiara North. Fucking leave and don’t show yourself in front of me again,” he said and pushed me away.

Muntik na akong mawalan ng balanse pero buti na lang agad na naalalayan ni Denise ang likod ko.

I just bit my lower lip and nodded. What am I even trying to do? This is hopeless, trying to open his heart is hopeless and impossible. I should just leave and forget everything about him just like Xceron said.

But I know even if I finally get over Xanthos, I know I won’t be able to love someone again. Xanthos just gave me the worst trauma… he’s my greatest downfall.

Chapter Twenty-Three

“Thank you.”

Xceron just gave me a small smile and nodded. Sinenyasan n’ya na lang ako na pumasok na sa loob ng mansyon. Sumakay na rin siya sa kotse n’ya at agad pinaharurot ’yon. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at pinindot ang doorbell.

Saglit lang akong naghintay at pinagbuksan agad ako ni Manang Lanie. Nanlaki ang mga mata n’ya nang makita ako.

“Nako naman, hija! Buti dumating ka na, bakit naman ngayon ka lang umuwi? Nag-alala ako sa ’yo.”

Mukhang hindi alam ni manang ang totoong nangyari. Mas okay na ’yon, ayoko rin naman na mag-alala siya.

“Halika na sa loob,” sabi ni manang at iginiya na ’ko sa mansyon.

My footsteps are heavy as I walk my way inside the house. The house felt empty. Nawala na ang mga katulong at guard pati na rin ang ilan naming gamit. Hindi na ako nagulat, alam ko ng mangyayari ’to dahil kay Xanthos.

“Manang, how’s Dad? Is he alright?” I asked.

“Na-discharge na siya sa ospital pero ilang araw na siyang hindi makatulog at makakain nang ayos kakahintay sa ’yo,” tila nanenermong sabi ni manang.

I smiled shyly. “Sorry po, manang.”

Dumiretso ako sa silid ni Dad dahil nandoon daw siya ngayon. Naabutan ko siyang nakaupo sa malaking kama n’ya habang nakatitig sa bintana… He doesn’t look okay, I’m still worried now that I finally saw him.

“Dad…”

Dad immediately looked at me and stood up. Mukha siyang nabunutan ng tinik nang makita ako. Agad siyang lumapit sa ’kin at niyakap ako.

“Salamat sa Diyos. Sobra akong nag-alala sa ’yo, Kiara. Kapag may nangyaring masama sa ’yo, talagang magpapakamatay ako,” halos naluluhang sabi ni Dad habang nakayakap nang mahigpit sa ’kin.

“Please don’t say that, Dad… and I’m sorry for making you worry. I-It won’t happen again,” I muttered and hugged him back.

Kumalas ng yakap si Dad at nag-aalalang sinuri ako ng tingin.

“What did he do to you? Did he hurt you?” he asked while looking at me.

I shook my head. “Xanthos didn’t hurt me physically.” But he hurt my heart. He caused great damage to my heart.

Dad sighed and caressed my hair. It seems like he didn’t have a proper sleep. Napansin ko rin na mas pumayat siya. Pakiramdam ko may tila kung anong kumirot sa puso ko nang makita siyang ganito.

“That man… d-did he say something to you?” Dad asked. For some unknown reason, he seems kinda nervous. His hands start trembling.

“He didn’t… Is there something I need to know?” I asked.

Dad just shook his head and caressed my cheek.

“No, darling. Are you tired? You can take a rest,” he said and smiled at me.

“You too, Dad. You look tired, I told you to take care of yourself,” tila nanenermong sabi ko.

“Okay, okay… I’m sorry, I’ll take a rest now.”

Pagkatapos kong kausapin si Dad, nagtungo na ’ko sa kwarto ko para mag-shower at magpahinga. Wala naman akong masyadong kinilos pero pagod na pagod ang katawan ko.

Ang daming tumatakbo sa isip ko ngayon. I’m wondering… Dad saw how Xanthos pointed a gun at me, he saw what Xanthos did to me. Why isn’t he doing anything? Why isn’t he filing a case or something? I understand that he couldn’t call the police when I was with Xanthos but how about now? It doesn’t matter to me anyway, but I’m just wondering. Dad is very protective when it comes to me.

Is it because we don’t have money anymore? Or is there another reason?

Napailing na lang ako sa mga tumatakbo sa isip ko. Dahil sa pananatili ko kina Xanthos, nagagawa ko tuloy pagdudahan si Dad. Hindi dapat ’yon ang iniisip ko ngayon.

I need to find a job as soon as possible. Ako na ngayon ang dapat aasahan ni Dad lalo pa’t halos wala ng natira sa ’min. I should be the one to take care of Dad now.

For now, I’ll take a rest first. I just desperately need to close myself from everything even just for a moment.

---

“I won’t allow it, Kiara!”

Natigilan ako nang magtaas ng boses si Dad. Halata rin namang natigilan siya. Napabuntonghininga na lang siya saka napailing.

Umagang umaga, heto kami at nagtatalo ni Dad. Sinabi ko sa kanya na kailangan ko ng maghanap ng trabaho. Alam mong ganito ang magiging reaksyon n’ya pero wala naman kaming ibang choice.

“I’m sorry… Iniisip ko lang na paano kung may mangyari na namang masama sa ’yo?” bakas ang pag-aalala sa boses n’ya.

“He won’t bother me again, Dad. I need to find a job for us. Don’t you trust your daughter?” I asked him.

“Ako na ang magtatrabaho, Kiara. Just stay here, I can still work for the both of us.”

Napailing ako sa sinabi n’ya.

“I finally decided, Dad. Abi will help me find a job. Please don’t worry about me and just worry about yourself. Like I said before, you’re not getting any younger. Just take a rest and leave everything to me. I’m a strong and independent woman, Dad.” I smiled at Dad to give him assurance.

Dad sighed and held my hand. “If you’re really decided, I guess I can’t do anything about it… but please be careful, Kiara. I’ll lose my mind if something happens to you. Please take care of yourself too, darling,” Dad said, still disheartened.

After that conversation, I prepared myself to look for a job. I have a good educational background and work experience but it’s all because of my connections before. I know things won’t be easy from now on… but I have to be strong.

Lumabas na kaagad ako ng mansyon pagkatapos kong mag-ayos. Wala na ang kotse ko kaya sa taxi na lang ako sasakay. Buti na lang talaga at hindi kami iniwan ni Manang Lanie. Hindi mabigat sa dibdib ko ang umalis sa bahay dahil may kasama si Dad.

“Kiara, girl!”

Natigilan ako nang makita si Abi na nakaabang sa labas. Dala n’ya ang kotse n’ya. Napangiti na lang ako, mukhang hindi ko na kailangan mag-commute.

“Ihahatid mo ba ako?” natatawang tanong ko nang makalapit ako sa kanya.

“Kung mag-a-apply ka sa kompanya ng pamilya namin, ihahatid kita. Pero kung sa iba ka mag-a-apply, aba manigas ka teh,” sabi ni Abi at naghawi pa ng buhok. Natatawang napailing na lang ako.

“Okay, fine. I’ll give it a shot.”

Agad namang napapalakpak si Abi dahil sa excitement at pinagbuksan ako ng pinto. Papasok na sana ako sa kotse n’ya nang marinig kong may tumawag sa ’kin.

“Kiara my crush!”

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang makita si Denise na tumatakbo papaalapit sa ’kin. Hinihingal naman siya nang makahabol sa ’kin.

“What are you doing here, Denise?” I asked.

“Wait lang, crush. Hihinga muna ko. Wooh!” Napasapo pa si Denise sa dibdib n’ya habang hinihingal.

Abi’s eyebrow shot up. “Who is she?” she mumbled.

“Ahm, she’s a friend,” sagot ko na lang. “By the way, Abi, this is Denise. Denise, this is my best friend, Abi.”

Denise pouted. “Akala ko ba ako na ang new best friend mo?” tila nagtatampong tanong n’ya.

I blinked. “H-Huh? When did I say that?”

“Okay, fine. Crush na lang talaga kita. By the way, tinanong ko kay Sir Xceron ang address mo kaya ako nandito. Weird man pero pinag-day off ako ni Sir Xanthos ‘walang bayag’ kaya nagpunta agad ako rito,” paliwanag ni Denise.

Kaya pala simpleng pants at blouse lang ang suot n’ya imbis na work attire.

“Saan pala kayo pupunta?” tanong pa n’ya.

“Mag-a-apply ako sa kompanya nila,” sabi ko na lang at tinuro si Abi.

“Ah gano’n ba? Sama ako, Kiara. Sige na, ’diba second best friend mo na ’ko?” Kumapit si Denise sa braso ko.

“Ang feeling close mo naman,” mataray na sabat ni Abi.

Napataas ang kilay ni Denise. “Wow, ang sungit mo ha. Mamatay ka sanang virgin.”

Napasinghap si Abi sa sinabi n’ya.

“Sorry ka na lang, I’m not a virgin anymore,” Abi said and flipped her hair.

Napasinghap si Denise. “Lah, sana all,” tila naiinggit na sabi nito.

“I’m gonna be late, guys. Hanggang kailan ba natin pag-uusapan ang virginity stuff?” nakataas kilay na tanong ko.

Napapailing na pumasok na lang ako sa kotse ni Abi at pumwesto sa shotgun seat. Si Denise naman basta na lang sumakay sa backseat. Napairap na lang si Abi pero hindi na lang kumontra.

Buong biyahe, panay ang sagutan nina Abi at Denise. Pakiramdam ko napanggigitnaan ako ng dalawang maingay na babae.

Kahit papa’no naka-survive ako sa ingay nung dalawang ’yon at maayos na nakarating sa kompanya nina Abi. Pumasok na kami sa loob at hanggang doon nakasunod si Denise.

“Kay Kuya Archer ka magpa-interview, Kiara. Para tanggap ka kaagad. Ship ko na kayo ulit since sabi mo wala na kayo ni Mr. Archante,” nakangiting sabi ni Abi saka yumakap sa isang braso ko.

“Sino naman ’yung Archer na ’yon? Hindi pwede, si Sir Xanthos pa rin dapat kahit mapanakit siya. I believe in tinaguan ng anak supremacy. Pero sige, pwede rin maging boyfriend n’ya ang Archer na ’yon tapos magseselos si Sir Xanthos,” sabi naman ni Denise at sa kabilang braso ko naman siya yumakap.

“What the hell is that woman saying?” bulong ni Abi sa ’kin. “But well, I kinda like her, she’s cute,” dagdag pa n’ya.

I just smiled and nodded. She’s right. Denise is cute indeed. You can forget all your problems just by talking to her and listening to her out of this world stories.

“Hala, si Sir Cad ba ’yon?” tanong ni Denise

Natigilan ako sa paglalakad dahil sa sinabi n’ya. Tiningnan ko ang tinitingnan n’ya at tama nga siya, naglalakad si Cadence papalapit sa ’min ngayon.

I don’t know what to do. Should I just avoid him or what?

“Kiara… Can we talk?”

I just sighed and looked at him. I can’t just ignore him. He seems serious this time. Maybe he has to say something important. I guess it won’t hurt to hear him out.

“Kausapin mo na siya, Kiara. Isa siya sa potential second lead. Baka siya ang kilalaning ama ng baby n’yo ni Sir Xanthos,” bulong ni Denise.

“Ano ka ba? Hindi naman ako buntis,” natatawang sabi ko na lang.

“Di mo sure,” sabi naman n’ya.

Tumingin na lang ako kay Cad saka tumango. Napilitan sina Abi at Denise na iwan kaming dalawa. Nagtungo kami sa malapit na coffee shop. Tahimik lang ako habang magkasama kami.

“Kiara, ano… Sorry, a-ano, sorry sa kasalanan ko. Wala na ’kong masabi kasi ayoko namang i-justify ’yung ginawa ko. Ginusto kong gawin ’yon, ’yung mga ginawa ko, choice ko ’yon. Pwede akong tumanggi pero pumayag ako.”

I don’t know what to say, I remained quiet while listening to him… It’s just, I don’t know what to say because deep inside, I want him to defend himself.

“I know you won’t believe me if I say that I didn’t do that because of money… I actually did that because I want to help Xanthos,” Cadence added.

“W-Why do you want to help him do something like that?” My voice broke.

“I’ve been his friend for almost twenty years. His actions shouldn’t be justified but he had gone through a lot. His past made him like that. Your family, especially your father and your grandfather made him like that. You don’t need to understand us… you don’t need to understand him. Just live a normal life again and be happy. Isipin mo na lang na hindi kami dumating sa buhay mo. You don’t deserve to be tormented by him, you know nothing, you’re not involved.”

Nanatili akong tahimik. Napatungo ako at napahawak sa sling bag ko. Gustong gusto kong itanong sa kanya kung ano’ng kasalanan ng pamilya ko… pero pakiramdam ko gaya ni Xceron, hindi n’ya ’yon sasagutin dahil gusto n’yang mamuhay ako ng normal.

Pero ginulo na ni Xanthos ang buhay ko… hindi madali ang mamuhay ng normal ulit. Hindi gano’ng kadali.

NATANGGAP AKO bilang accountant sa kompanya nina Abi. Isang linggo na rin akong nagtatrabaho ro’n at pilit kong binabalik sa normal ang sarili ko kahit na mahirap.

Napapansin ko sa sarili ko na nahihirapan na ako lalong matulog sa gabi at palagi akong walang gana kumain. Hindi mapalagay ang isip ko.

Naiisip ko si Dad, si Mom, si Xanthos… naiisip ko kung ano’ng atraso ng pamilya ko ang tinutukoy nila. Gusto kong malaman at pakiramdam ko, patuloy akong magiging ganito hangga’t hindi ko nalalaman.

Sinubukan kong tanungin si Denise pero wala siyang alam tungkol do’n. Si Cad naman, kahit tanungin ko siya… alam kong hindi n’ya sasabihin.

“Crush, ang laki ng pinayat mo. Maganda ka pa rin naman pero baka naman napapabayaan mo na ang health mo,” sabi ni Denise habang nakain ng turon.

Napansin ko na palagi yatang may time si Denise na samahan ako. Tinanong ko siya kung nag-resign na ba siya kay Xanthos pero secretary pa rin daw siya nito. Pero nakakapagtaka na lagi siyang nakabuntot sa ’kin. Hindi naman ako nagrereklamo dahil gusto ko naman siyang kasama palagi, nakakapagtaka lang talaga.

Gaya ng paulit-ulit na nangyayari, umuwi ako ng walang lakas. Agad akong humiga sa kama at tumitig sa kisame habang nag-aalpasan ang mga luha mula sa mga mata ko.

As I expected, this is not easy. I don’t know why I have to love him too much and suffer from it big time. This is so unfair. Do I even deserve this?

I stood up and wiped my tears. I can’t take this anymore. I need to talk to Cad. I want to know everything now. It feels like I need to know it now.

Lumabas ako ng bahay nang hindi alam ni Dad. Agad akong sumakay ng taxi at nagtungo sa unit ni Cad.

Pakiramdam ko, alam ko man o hindi ang totoo, mahihirapan at mahihirapan pa rin ako kaya mas maganda ng alam ko. Ayoko ng manatiling walang alam sa mga nangyayari.

I won’t be able to get over Xanthos if I don’t know his reason. I have to know it. Kung maaari pilitin ko si Cad, gagawin ko para lang sabihin n’ya sa ’kin ang totoo.

Pinindot ko ang doorbell nang nasa tapat na ako ng pinto ni Cad. Pero nakailang pindot na yata ako, wala pa ring nagbubukas ng pinto.

Sira ba ang doorbell n’ya?

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko nang maalala ko ang PIN code ni Cad. Sana iyon pa rin ang code n’ya.

Napabuntonghininga ako at pinindot ang PIN code n’ya. Tila nakahinga ako nang maluwag nang magbukas ’yon.

“Cad?” tawag ko sa kanya nang pumasok na ako sa loob.

Tila walang tao sa loob dahil tahimik pero nakabukas naman ang ilaw. Siguro nandito si Cad. Baka hindi lang talaga gumana ang doorbell n’ya.

Nilibot ko ang tingin sa paligid. Himala na wala masyadong kalat sa unit ni Cad ngayon… pero nasaan ba siya?

Nagtungo ako sa balcony. Natigilan ako nang makitang nandoon si Xanthos, kausap n’ya si Cadence.

Nandito rin siya? Mukhang kailangan ko ng umalis nang palihim. Buti na lang at nakatalikod sila sa pwesto ko.

Akmang aalis na ako ngunit narinig kong binanggit ni Cad ang pangalan ko.

“Kung wala ka talagang pakialam kay Kiara, bakit tinatanong mo siya sa ’kin palagi? Saka akala mo ba hindi ko alam na pinapabuntot mo ’yung secretary mo sa kanya? Bakit hindi mo na lang siya kausapin, mag-sorry ka, ayusin n’yo ang problema n’yo,” sabi ni Cad saka nagbuga ng usok mula sa sigarilyo n’ya.

“Why would I say sorry? She’s Kairo’s daughter, Cad… and besides, I just want to make sure that she’s living a miserable life,” Xanthos said.

I bit my lower lip and suppressed my tears. It seems like coming here wasn’t a good idea.

“Ulol, sa ’kin ka pa magsisinungaling. Mas matagal mo ’kong nakasama kaysa kay Xceron. Kilala kita, ibang level ’yang pagiging in denial mo. Niloloko mo lang ’yang sarili mo,” napapailing na sabi ni Cad.

Natahimik si Xanthos. Napalunok ako at napahawak nang mahigpit sa laylayan ng damit ko. Bakit hinihintay ko ang sasabihin n’ya?

“She’s a North, Cad. Kairo North raped my helpless mother… A-And Kiara’s grandfather, Aldovino North, killed my mother after that. So tell me, Cad. How can I love her?!”

Pakiramdam ko literal na nanlamig ang buong katawan ko sa sinabi ni Xanthos. Agad na nanginig ang mga tuhod ko dahilan para mapaupo ako sa sahig. Bumigat ang paghinga ko na halos hinahabol ko na ’yon dahil sa matinding paninikip ng dibdib ko.

Agad na napatingin sa ’kin sina Xanthos at Cad nang gumawa ng ingay ang pagbagsak ko sa sahig.

“K-Kiara…” mahinang usal ni Cad.

Napasapo ako sa dibdib ko habang pilit na hinahabol ang paghinga ko. Sobrang sakit ng dibdib ko. Naiiyak ako dahil hindi na ako makahinga.

“I-I can’t breathe… h-help me,” naghahabol hiningang sabi ko habang lumuluha.

Nakita ko na lang na nagmamadaling lumapit sa ’kin sina Cad at Xanthos bago ako tuluyang nawalan ng malay.

• • • ~ ~ ~ * * *

NOTE:

Guys, kung madi-disappoint man kayo kung sakaling hindi mangyayari ang expectations n’yo sa story, sana wag n’yo ko i-bash huhu. Feeling matapang lang ako pero softie at crybaby talaga ako sa mga harsh words at bash.

Pero pwede n’yo murahin ’yung characters ko especially kapag mali talaga sila. Hindi ko naman jina-justify mga mali nila. Kahit ako minumura ko sila sa isip ko hehe (lol)

Chapter Twenty-Four

“Nag-hyperventilate siya kaya siya nahirapang huminga kanina, usually panic, anxiety or stress ang cause no’n. Buti napadaan ako rito dahil may inutos si Sir Arken, pero mas maganda kung dadalhin n’yo siya sa ospital. I’m still a med student, baka may iba pa siyang sakit o ano.”

“Sige. Thank you, Adham.” Narinig ko ang boses ni Cad.

I slowly opened my eyes. My eyelids and my chest are heavy, but it’s bearable now unlike earlier. I never experienced hyperventilating before. I never thought it would be that painful, it felt like my heart is ripping apart. It was so hard to breathe.

Natigilan sila nang mapatingin sa ’kin. Nanghihinang bumangon ako. Bukod kina Cad at Xanthos, may isa pang lalaki sa silid na ’to na hindi pamilyar sa ’kin pero wala na akong pakialam do’n.

Kahit nanghihina ako, pinilit kong tumayo. Hindi maalis ang tingin ko kay Xanthos na nakatingin din sa ’kin. I can’t read what’s going on in his mind right now.

“Hey, you should rest more,” sabi ng lalaking hindi pamilyar sa ’kin saka marahang hinawakan ang braso ko.

“Let me go,” mariing sabi ko saka inalis ang pagkakahawak n’ya sa ’kin.

Agad akong lumapit kay Xanthos at kinwelyuhan siya. Nanatili naman siyang walang emosyon na nakatitig sa ’kin.

“Kiara, a-about what you heard earlier, let me explain about–” agad na pinutol ni Xanthos ang sasabihin ni Cadence.

“Leave us alone.”

Cad sighed and nodded. He tapped the other guy’s shoulder and left us alone in this room. Nanatili naman akong nakakapit nang mahigpit sa damit ni Xanthos na tila doon ko binibigay lahat ng natitirang lakas ko.

“A-Ano ang karapatan mong pagbintangan nang gano’n si Dad at Lolo?! Bakit kailangan mong magsinungaling nang gano’n dahil lang galit ka sa kanila?!”

My hands are literally shaking right now. I can’t even think or talk straight because of the raging emotions I feel inside of me. I don’t know what to think or believe anymore. My emotions are taking full control of my judgement.

“Calm down, Kiara,” Xanthos said and tried to remove my grasp on him.

“How can I calm down after I heard those bullshits from you?! W-What did you say? D-Dad raped your mother?! You’ve got to be kidding me, Xanthos! He won’t do that, he will never do such thing! Bakit ka nagsisinungaling?!”

Nanlalabo na naman ang paningin ko dahil sa mga nagbabadyang luha. Nanginginig na rin halos buong katawan ko. Natatakot ako sa sasabihin n’ya, pero ang mas kinakatakot ko ay ang katotohanan na kanina lang gusto kong malaman.

Kung gano’ng kasakit din pala ang totoo, sana hindi ko na lang inalam.

“Say something, Xanthos. Tell me that you’re lying! P-Please, say something!”

Xanthos closed his eyes and clenched his jaw.

“Fine! Do you really want to hear the truth, huh, Kiara?!” Xanthos asked. “Yes, everything that you heard is true. Y-Your father raped my mother and I saw how my mother suffered from it. A-After that, Aldovino North killed her to shut her up… and I saw it Kiara. I-I saw how your grandfather mercilessly killed my mother like her life is only for him to take. Until now, I can’t sleep peacefully because I remember everything every time I close my eyes. T-That’s why I want you to suffer too! I want Kairo North’s loved ones to suffer too…” Xanthos’ eyes glistened as if he’s about to cry. Every words he said felt like daggers that stabbed me deep within my soul. I can feel his pain in every words… and it left me speechless.

Nanghihinang napaatras ako. Patuloy sa pagdaloy ang mga luha ko na halos hindi ko na maaninag ang mukha ni Xanthos. Naluluhang lumabas ako ng silid na ’yon. Nakita kong naghihintay sina Cad sa living room. Akmang lalapit na siya sa ’kin pero agad akong tumakbo palabas ng unit n’ya.

Patuloy akong lumuluha at halos lahat ng nadadaanan ko ay napapatingin sa ’kin pero wala na ’kong pakialam sa lahat ng ’yon. Dali dali akong sumakay ng taxi pabalik sa bahay.

Hindi kayang paniwalaan ng puso ko ang lahat ng sinabi ni Xanthos. Si Dad lang ang gusto kong paniwalaan. Kilala ko si Dad, imposibleng gumawa siya ng gano’ng bagay pati na rin si Lolo. Mabuti silang tao, hindi nila magagawa ang binibintang ni Xanthos… hindi.

Nanghihinang naglakad ako papasok ng bahay. Agad akong sinalubong ni manang na mukhang kanina pa naghihintay sa ’kin.

“Ano ka bang bata ka? Bakit naman bigla kang umalis ng ganitong oras? Halos atakihin ako sa puso nang makitang wala ka sa kwarto mo… Teka, b-bakit ka naiyak?” natigilan si manang nang makita akong naluha.

“M-Manang, nasaan po si Dad?”

Napakunot ang noo n’ya. “Nasa library si Sir, hindi pa rin siya natutulog.”

Hindi ko na hinintay na sumagot si manang. Dali dali akong nagtungo sa library upang puntahan si Dad. Naabutan ko naman siya na nakatayo ro’n habang nakatitig sa bintana. Napalingon naman siya sa ’kin nang maramdaman n’yang pumasok ako sa loob. Dali dali siyang lumapit sa ’kin.

“What brings you here, Kiara? Do you need something?” Napatitig sa ’kin si Dad. “B-Bakit ka umiiyak, anak?”

I bit my lower lip and suppress my sobs. I held Dad’s hand to gather strength and did my best to stop myself from shaking terribly… I know Dad will definitely deny it even if I ask but I don’t care, I just want to hear him say that it wasn’t true. I want to hear from him that everything that Xanthos said wasn’t true… Kung totoo man ’yon, malamang hindi ko kakayanin. Hindi ko talaga kakayanin.

“D-Dad, kilala mo ba si Cerniah Dela Paz?” naluluhang tanong ko.

Natigilan si Dad sa tanong ko. Kitang kita ko kung paano nawalan ng kulay ang mukha n’ya. Hindi rin nakawala sa ’kin ang panginginig ng kamay n’ya na hawak ko ngayon.

“D-Did you… did you rape her, Dad?” I felt a lump on my throat. “I-I’m sorry for asking that, Dad. Of course that can’t be true, right? S-Some liar said grandpa killed her after you raped her to silenced her… That’s not true, right? P-Please tell me, Dad.”

Hindi nakapagsalita si Dad. Mas lalong umakyat ang kaba at takot sa puso ko nang makita ko ang naluluhang mga mata n’ya. Nanghihinang napaatras siya at napaiwas ng tingin sa ’kin. Agad na nag-alpasan ang mga luha mula sa mga mata ko.

“Say something, Dad! B-Bakit hindi mo tinatanggi?! Pinagbibintangan ka ng kung sino sa krimen na hindi mo ginawa! Magsalita ka, Dad! Sabihin mo sa ’kin na hindi totoo ang sinabi n’ya!”

Napahilamos si Dad sa mukha n’ya. Nanghihinang napakapit siya sa table kasabay ng tlyang pagdaloy ng mga luha sa pisngi n’ya.

“H-Hindi ko sinasadya ’yon, Kiara… I-I loved her too much that time. Believe me, Kiara… I-I was drunk and I lose my mind for a second.”

Nanghihinang napaupo ako sa sahig. Napatakip ako sa bibig ko habang patuloy na tumatakas ang mga luha mula sa mga mata ko. Tila wala na ’kong maintindihan sa mga oras na ’to. Sobrang bigat sa dibdib. Ang hirap na huminga.

“N-Nagising na lang ako isang araw na patay na siya. I was too late. Desperado na ang Lolo mo ng mga panahong ’yon dahil ayaw n’yang masira ang kompanya dahil sa kasalanan ko. W-Wala akong nagawa, Kiara. Wala akong ibang pagpipilian dahil ayokong masira ang kompanya pati ang kinabukasan mo. K-Kahit gusto kong pagbayaran ang kasalanan ko noon, h-hindi ko magawa dahil ikaw ang nasa isip ko–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“Sinasabi mo bang dahil sa ’kin kaya nandito ka at malaya?! Hindi mo pinagbabayaran ang kasalanan mo para sa ’kin?! Sa tingin mo ikakatuwa kong marinig ’yon?!”

Kahit hinang hina ako ngayon, pinilit kong tumayo. Nanginginig ang mga kamay na lumapit ako kay Dad at sinampal siya. Pakiramdam ko kusang gumalaw ang kamay ko. Pakiramdam ko unti-unting nawawala ang ang respeto ko para sa kanya.

“K-Kiara, anak… p-patawarin mo ’ko,” lumuluhang sabi ni Dad.

“Napakasama mo! Sobrang sama n’yo! Paano n’yo nagawang sirain ang buhay ng inosenteng tao para sa pansariling interes n’yo?! Galit na galit ako sa ’yo, Dad! Kinamumuhian kita! K-Kinakahiya ko na ikaw ang tatay ko!”

Tuluyan akong napahagulgol ng iyak. Pakiramdam ko ngayon lang sumakit ng ganito ang dibdib ko. Iba ang sakit na nararamdaman ko sa puso ko ngayong napatunayan kong totoo ang binibintang ni Xanthos sa pamilya ko. Hindi ko na alam kung magagawa ko pang lumunok ng pagkain o matulog sa gabi… pero walang wala ang sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon kumpara sa sakit na ilang taong tiniis ni Xanthos.

“K-Kung gusto mo, ipapakulong ko ang sarili ko ngayon din, Kiara. H-Habang buhay kong pagdurusahan sa kulungan ang naging kasalanan namin ng Lolo mo. H’wag mo lang akong kamuhian, anak… Ikaw na lang ang meron ako.” Sinubukang hawakan ni Dad ang braso ko ngunit agad akong umiwas sa kanya.

“H’wag mo ’kong hawakan!”

Nanghihinang humakbang ako palayo kay Dad. Ayoko ng marinig pa ang mga sasabihin n’ya o ang makita man lang ang mukha n’ya. I hate him so much, I hate him and grandpa to death!

Naramdaman kong humabol sa ’kin si Dad hanggang sa makalabas ako ng mansyon pero dali dali akong tumakbo palayo. Kahit hinang hina ang mga binti ko, pinilit kong makatakbo palayo hanggang sa hindi ko na siya makita. Nang makakita ako ng taxi, agad akong sumakay ro’n pabalik sa unit ni Cad.

Patuloy akong naiyak sa biyahe. Nararamdaman kong tumitingin sa ’kin ang driver pero minabuti n’yang hindi na lang magtanong. Hanggang ngayon nanginginig ako sa sobrang galit. Pakiramdam ko ngayon lang ako nakaramdam ng ganitong katinding galit, sobrang bigat sa pakiramdam.

I’m mentally and physically tired right now. I’ve never been this tired before. Pati ang mga mata ko ay pagod na rin sa pag-iyak pero ayaw tumigil ng mga luha ko sa pagdaloy.

Agad akong sinalubong ni Cadence pagpasok ko sa unit n’ya. Kitang kita ko ang pag-aalala sa mga mata n’ya nang makita ang kalagayan ko ngayon. Nanginginig ang mga kamay na napayakap ako sa sarili ko habang patuloy na naluha.

“I-I don’t want to go home, Cad… Can I stay here for awhile?”

Napalingon si Cad sa likuran n’ya, napatingin din ako ro’n. Natigilan ako nang makita si Xanthos na nakaupo sa couch habang nakatingin sa direksyon namin. Agad akong napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya… Nandito pa rin pala siya.

“You can stay here, Kiara,” he said and caressed my hair.

Nanginginig ang mga tuhod na nagtungo ako sa kusina. Naramdaman kong hinahabol ako ng tingin ni Cad ngunit hindi na lang siya nagsalita. Agad akong kumuha ng kutsilyo.

“Kiara!”

Agad na lumapit sa ’kin si Cad at sinubukang kuhanin sa ’kin ang kutsilyo ngunit hinigpitan ko ang hawak ko ro’n.

“Kiara, p-please calm down. Don’t do this.”

I can’t hear Cad’s voice anymore. I don’t know what to feel anymore. My mind is stuffy, my chest feels heavy… Sobrang bigat na ng pakiramdam ko.

“Cad, I’ll talk to her. Iwan mo muna kami,” sabi ni Xanthos nang makalapit na siya sa ’min.

Napabuntonghininga si Cad. Tila nagdadalawang isip pa siya kung iiwan kami pero napatango na lang siya at lumayo.

Nanghihinang napaupo ako sa sahig at napahagulgol ng iyak habang nakahawak pa rin sa kutsilyo. Lumuhod si Xanthos at hinawakan ang kamay kong may hawak na kutsilyo. Agad ko namang itinutok ang kutsilyo sa tiyan ko.

“I-I give you the liberty to kill me, Xanthos. Make my Dad pay by killing me. P-Please, kill me now.”

Xanthos didn’t say anything. He forcefully took the knife from me and threw it away.

“Stop it, Kiara. Just stop,” he muttered.

Napapikit ako nang mariin habang patuloy pa ring umiiyak sa harapan n’ya. Pakiramdam ko kusang kumilos ang katawan ko at hinila siya para yakapin. Halata namang natigilan siya sa ginawa ko.

“Kiara…”

“S-Sorry, Xanthos. Sorry dahil kinailangan mong danasin ang lahat ng ’yon dahil sa pamilya ko. S-Siguro hirap na hirap ka pa rin hanggang ngayon. S-Sorry dahil kinailangan mong magkaganito dahil sa kanila. A-Alam kong hindi ka masama, napilitan kang maging masama at mahirapan mag-isa dahil sa pamilya ko… S-Sorry, Xanthos. Sorry dahil nahihirapan ka nang sobra. H-Hindi mo deserve maranasan ang lahat ng ’yon. H-Hindi ko alam kung paano namin pagbabayaran ’yon, hindi ko alam kung paano aalisin ang sakit na nararamdaman mo. S-Sabihin mo sa ’kin kung paano ko mapapagaan ang pakiramdam mo… kahit konti lang, kahit sariling buhay ko ’yung kapalit… mawala lang ’yung bigat sa puso mo.” Mas lalong humigpit ang yakap ko sa kanya.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing nanginginig ang balikat ni Xanthos. Napalunok ako at napatigil sa pag-iyak…

Umiiyak ba siya?

“X-Xanthos…” Akmang kakalas ako sa pagyakap sa kanya upang makita ang mukha n’ya pero agad siyang humawak sa likod ko. Tila ba pinipigilan n’ya akong kumalas ng yakap sa kanya.

“P-Please, don’t look at me. J-Just keep hugging me like this, please.”

Pakiramdam ko ay lalo akong nanghina nang marinig ko ang nanginginig n’yang boses. Palagi kong nakikitang malungkot ang mga mata n’ya pero ito ang unang beses na nakita ko siyang umiyak. He looks like a lost child crying in his mother’s arms. I just found myself caressing his back, letting him cry. He hugged me tighter and buried his face on my neck. Naramdaman kong nababasa ’yon ng luha pero wala na ’kong pakialam. Ang gusto ko lang ay ang mapagaan ang pakiramdam n’ya kahit sa ganitong paraan.

“Kiara, I-I don’t know what to do anymore…”

Napaluha na rin ako nang marinig ang tila nahihirapan n’yang boses. Halos hindi ko maisip kung gaano katagal n’ya kinimkim at sinarili ang mga luhang inilalabas n’ya ngayon. Pakiramdam ko parang batong dumadagan sa puso ko ang mga paghikbi n’ya at ang pagtulo ng mga luha n’ya sa balikat ko.

Napakapit ako nang mahigpit sa damit n’ya nang maramdaman kong nanlalabo ang paningin ko. Napailing ako at pilit na nilabanan ang pag-ikot ng paningin ko pero pakiramdam ko unti unti akong nilalamon ng pagkahilong nararamdaman ko.

“X-Xanthos…” nasabi ko na lang bago tuluyang nagdilim ang paningin ko at bumagsak sa mga bisig n’ya.

I OPENED my eyes slowly. I groaned softly when I felt a slight pain on my stomach. I roamed my eyes around the place. I saw Xanthos sitting on the chair beside my bed. Nakatitig siya sa ibang direksyon kaya malamang hindi n’ya napansing gising na ako. Napadaing na lang ako at pinilit na bumangon.

Mukhang nasa ospital kami ngayon. Siguro dinala agad nila ako rito matapos kong mawalan ng malay.

Muli akong tumingin kay Xanthos, nakatingin na siya sa ’kin ngayon. Napatingin ako sa namumula n’yang mga mata na mukhang kakagaling sa pag-iyak. Napabuntonghininga siya saka tumayo at lumapit sa ’kin. Nanatili lang akong nakatitig sa kanya nang marahan n’yang inilapat ang palad sa noo ko.

“Humiga ka ulit,” sabi na lang n’ya saka muli akong inalalayan pahiga sa kama. Hindi na lang ako kumontra at sinunod siya.

Muling umupo si Xanthos sa upuan n’ya at tumitig na lang sa ’kin. Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya. Pakiramdam ko sobrang daming nangyari ngayong araw na halos hindi ’yon nagpo-proseso nang ayos sa isip ko.

Natigilan lang ako sa pag-iisip nang may pumasok na doktor sa silid.

“Good evening, Mr. Archante, Ms. North,” sabi ng doktor nang makalapit ito sa amin.

“How’s the result, doc? How is she?” tanong ni Xanthos sa doktor.

“Ms. North collapsed because of fatigue or too much stress.” The doctor looked at me. “You have to be careful from now on, Ms. North. Avoid stress as much as possible because it won’t be good for you and your child. Buti na lang at malakas ang kapit ng bata.”

Pakiramdam ko tumigil ang lahat sa paligid ko nang marinig ko ang huling sinabi ng doktor. Maski si Xanthos ay halatang natigilan din.

“What did you just say?” tanong ni Xanthos at napatayo pa mula sa kinauupuan nito.

Muli akong natigagal sa isinagot ng doktor.

“Ms. North is seven weeks pregnant.”

Chapter Twenty-Five

Natahimik kaming pareho nang makaalis na ang doktor. Sa mga oras na ’to, hindi ko alam kung ano ba’ng dapat kong maramdaman. Pilit kong pinakikiramdaman ang sarili ko pero hindi ko matukoy kung ano’ng emosyon ang nararamdaman ko ngayon.

“Xanthos…”

Xanthos looked at me. I stared at him and tried to read what he’s thinking right now but I couldn’t. Pakiramdam ko ayaw ko na ring malaman ang iniisip n’ya dahil baka hindi ko ikatuwa ’yon.

“What should we do?” I asked in a weak voice. “I-Ipapalaglag ko ba ang bata?”

Hindi agad nakasagot si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. Nakatitig lang siya sa ’kin na tila ba binabasa n’ya ang iniisip ko.

“I-I’m mentally unstable, Xanthos, and besides, I don’t want the child grew in a toxic environment. I-I think it will be better to get rid of–” agad na pinutol ni Xanthos ang sasabihin ko.

“Do you want to get rid of our child?” Xanthos asked while staring at me.

Natigilan ako sa tanong n’ya. Agad akong napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya saka napakapit nang mahigpit sa bed sheet.

“W-Whether I want to or not is not important. What important is that–”

Muli akong natigilan nang lumapit sa ’kin si Xanthos. Inilapat n’ya ang mga kamay sa kamang hinihigaan ko saka mas lumapit sa ’kin.

“Answer my question, Kiara. Do you want to get rid of our child?” he asked while staring directly at me.

I sighed in defeat. I can feel something in his eyes right now that I can’t explain. His stare makes me want to be honest with myself. I bit my lower lip and shook my head. “I-I don’t want to.”

I didn’t expect him to ask that. Akala ko nga ay siya pa ang unang magsasabi na ipalaglag ko ang bata dahil galit siya sa pamilya ko.

“I know it’s your body, Kiara, our child is in your body. You’re the one who’ll bear our child and it’s your choice whether you want to get rid of it or not. B-But if you’ll ask me… I-I don’t want you to get rid of it. I want our child to live,” he muttered in a soft voice.

My lips parted while staring at him. The look on his face can’t lie. It’s been awhile since the last time I saw his soft expression. It seems like he really want our child to live. He doesn’t want to get rid of it too.

“A-Are you sure? This child’s grandfather is the man who made you and y-your mother suffer,” I mumbled and touched my tummy.

“I know it feels wrong hearing this from me… but our child is innocent… you too,” he murmured the last part that I almost didn’t hear it.

I bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze… Why did he say that? Sinabi n’ya lang ba ’yon dahil buntis ako?

Natahimik na lang kami pareho matapos naming mapagdesisyunan na h’wag ipalaglag ang anak namin. Nahalata ko rin sa kanya na talagang wala siyang balak pumayag sa bagay na ’yon na hindi ko inaasahan.

I honestly didn’t expect him to care for our child. I know how he hates my family, the blood in my veins… and I expected that he’ll hate our child too.

Pero siguro masyado lang masama ang tingin ko sa kanya.

“Can you walk?” Xanthos asked while walking beside me.

Binabagalan n’ya nang kaunti maglakad para makasabay sa mga hakbang ko.

I smiled and nodded. “I can manage.”

Pwede na ’kong lumabas ng ospital. Marami lang binilin sa ’min ang doktor bago kami pinaalis. Mukhang mas kailangan ko na talagang mag-ingat ngayon dahil hindi na lang buhay ko ang nasa kamay ko ngayon.

Tahimik pa rin kami ni Xanthos sa kotse n’ya. Pasimple akong napatingin sa kanya.

“Xanthos, I’ll stay at my friend’s place. Can you take me there?” I asked and gripped the seatbelt.

Napakunot ang noo ni Xanthos. “Kanino? Kay Cad?”

Natigilan ako sa tanong n’ya. Hindi ko alam pero tila iba ang dating sa ’kin ng tanong n’ya.

“Hindi… sa isang kaibigan ko, si Abi,” sabi ko na lang.

Saglit na natahimik si Xanthos. Nakatingin pa rin ako sa kanya na abala sa pagmamaneho. Hindi ko na naman malaman ang tumatakbo sa isip n’ya ngayon.

“Why don’t you just…” He cleared his throat. “…why don’t you just stay at my place?”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Tila hindi nagproseso sa isip ko ’yon. Pakiramdam ko nagkamali lang ako ng narinig.

“I’m not forcing you if you don’t want to… but I think we should consider it. I mean, living together. I know you don’t trust me anymore, but I promise I won’t harm you. I won’t even touch you without permission. I just want to take care of you while you’re pregnant,” he said while his eyes is still on the road.

Napatingin na lang ako sa kamay ko. Saglit akong natahimik habang iniisip kung ano ang isasagot ko sa kanya. Totoo ang sinabi n’yang nawalan ako ng tiwala sa kanya, sa kilos n’ya, sa mga salita n’ya… paano kung umasa na naman ako na okay kami ngayon pero ma-realize n’ya na hindi n’ya ako kayang sikmurain?

“Just stay with me for one week. After that, I’ll take you to your friend. But please let me visit you there. Denise will always visit to check on you too. Is that alright?” he asked and glanced at me.

I sighed and nodded. “Okay.”

Muli kaming natahimik pagkatapos no’n. Hindi na lang din ako umimik at tumingin na lang sa mga nadadaanan namin. Wala naman sigurong masama kung pagbibigyan ko siya ngayon. Tutal isang linggo lang naman, wala rin akong balak magtagal sa pad n’ya.

“Do you want to eat something?” Xanthos asked, breaking the silence between us.

I shook my head. “I’m not hungry. I just want to take a rest.”

Xanthos nodded. The atmosphere became silent again and no one dared to talk after that. I just leaned my back on the backrest and closed my eyes.

Galit na galit ako kay Dad ngayon pero hindi ko maiwasang isipin siya. Kahit na galit ako sa kanya, hindi ko pa rin maiwasang isipin na sana okay lang siya dahil ayaw ko munang siyang harapin o makita man lang.

Hindi dahilan na nalasing siya o kaya naman mahal n’ya kaya n’ya nagawa ’yon sa nanay ni Xanthos… Lasing man o hindi, hindi n’ya dapat ginawa ’yon. Namumuhi ako sa kanya sa tuwing naiisip ko na nagawa n’yang pagsamantalahan nang walang kalaban-laban ang nanay ni Xanthos.

Sa lalim ng iniisip ko, halos hindi ko na namalayan na nandito na pala kami sa pad ni Xanthos. Agad n’ya kong pinagbuksan ng pinto at inalalayan pababa ng kotse. Hindi na lang ako nagsalita at hinayaan siya dahil medyo nanghihina rin naman talaga ako.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing nakabukas ang ilaw sa pad ni Xanthos pagpasok namin. May tao na ba ritong nauna sa ’min?

“Kiara my crush!”

I smiled when Denise immediately run to my direction and hugged my arm. I don’t know why she’s here but it’s not a bad thing. The atmosphere will be much lighter if she’s here.

“Hi, North girl.”

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa living room. Nandoon din sina Xceron at Cadence. Nagtatakang napatingin ako sa kanila. Bakit nandito rin sila?

“Upo ka, Kiarabog,” sabi ni Cad saka sinenyasan ako na umupo sa tabi n’ya.

Kahit medyo nagtataka, lumapit na lang ako sa kanila. Si Xanthos naman ay tahimik lang na nakasunod sa ’kin. Akmang uupo na ako sa tabi ni Cad pero agad akong nahila ni Denise paupo sa tabi n’ya. Hindi na lang ako kumontra at hinayaan siya.

Si Xanthos naman ay umupo sa single sofa. Nanatili siyang tahimik habang nag-uusap usap kami.

“Kiara, congrats nga pala. Sana kunin mo ’kong ninong,” sabi ni Cad.

My forehead creased. “How did you know?”

Cad grinned and scratched his thick eyebrow. “Alam ko lahat ng bagay sa mundo, sis.”

“Ano’ng meron?” tila walang ideyang tanong ni Denise.

“North girl is pregnant, Denise,” Xceron said.

Denise gasped and looked at me with disbelief. She took a deep breath and stared at me again.

“Hala, sino’ng tatay?” tanong ni Denise at napatakip sa bibig n’ya.

“Ang bobo mo naman, Denise. Siguro ako ’yung tatay ’no?” puno ng sarkasmong sabi ni Cad. “Paltan mo na nga ’yang secretary mo, Xanthos. Parang timang.”

“Alam ko naman kasing si Sir Xanthos ’yung tatay, parang sarcasm lang kasi ’yung pagkagulat ko kanina. Ikaw ’yung bobo, e,” sabi naman ni Denise saka inismiran si Cad.

Napatingin sa ’kin si Denise. “Paano na ’yung mala-wattpad story na plano natin, Kiara? Hindi mo na matataguan ng anak si Sir Xanthos sa ganitong sitwasyon. Wala ka ng kawala ro’n,” bulong n’ya sa ’kin.

Tipid na napangiti na lang ako at umiling. “Does it even happen in real life? Taguan ng anak stuff?” natatawang tanong ko. “And besides, even though we’re not in good terms, I think it will be unfair to hide our child from him. I’m not that selfish.”

Denise sighed and hugged me again. “You’re an angel, Kiara. Lalo kitang nagiging crush,” sabi ni Denise.

“Ano ng plano n’yong dalawa, guys? Magpapakasal ba kayo for the baby’s sake kagaya ng sa wattpad?” tanong ni Cad.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos na nakatingin din sa ’kin. Napaiwas na lang ulit ako ng tingin sa kanya.

“We will take care of the child but it doesn’t mean we have to get married or what,” I said and touched my tummy.

We haven’t talk about it yet but I’ll take it like that. I know he has no plans of marrying me anyway, and so do I. I’m the only one who’s in love with him. He doesn’t have feelings for me and I don’t want to burden him with marriage just because I’m pregnant… That kind of marriage will never work.

UMALIS NA rin kaagad sina Denise pagkatapos nang saglit naming pag-uusap usap. Muling naging tahimik sa pad ni Xanthos nang kaming dalawa na lang ang naiwan.

“Go to sleep now,” Xanthos said. I just nodded and laid my back on the bed.

He was about to head out of the room but I immediately called him. “Xanthos…”

Xanthos looked at me. “Hmm?”

“S-Saan ka matutulog?” tanong ko sa mahinang boses.

“Sa living room,” tipid na sagot n’ya.

“Are you sure?” I asked and hugged his pillow.

Xanthos nodded. “Yeah, just call me if you need anything.” Pagkasabi n’ya no’n ay agad din siyang lumabas.

Pumikit na lang ako at sinubukang matulog nang walang iniisip. Sabi ng doktor makakasama sa baby kung hahayaan ko na naman ang sarili ko na magpatalo sa stress. Pipilitin kong matulog nang payapa… sana kayanin ko.

Inabot na yata ako ng mahigit isang oras na pagtitit sa kisame pero hindi man lang ako makaramdam ng antok. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako nang kumalam ang sikmura ko.

“I’m hungry…” I murmured and stood up. I went out of my room and looked for Xanthos at the living room.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing wala siya ro’n. Lumabas ako at naabutan ko siyang nakaupo sa beach chair sa may pool area.

Hindi ba siya matutulog?

Napapitlag ako nang mapalingon siya sa direksyon ko na tila ba naramdaman n’ya ang presensya ko.

“Do you need something?” he asked in a soft voice while staring at me.

“I-I’m hungry,” I mumbled and played with my nails.

Xanthos stood up and walk to my direction. “What do you want to eat? I’ll buy it for you.”

“I want a burger with a lot of mayonnaise in it, as in lots of mayonnaise, Xanthos,” I said and bit my lower lip.

I really really want it right now.

“Okay, wait for me inside. It’s cold here,” Xanthos said. I just nodded and went inside.

Naghintay na lang ako kay Xanthos sa living room nang makaalis na siya. Hindi ko alam kung may mabibilhan pa ba siya no’n ng ganitong oras pero magtitiwala na lang ako sa kanya.

Saglit lang akong naghintay kay Xanthos. Dumating siya na may dalang burger. Agad akong napangiti nang makitang maraming mayonnaise ’yon.

“Go to sleep after you eat, Kiara. Masama sa ’yo ang magpuyat,” sabi ni Xanthos na katabi ko ngayon habang pinapanood akong kumain.

Hindi ko na lang pinansin ang sinabi n’ya at ine-enjoy ang burger na kinakain ko.

Pakiramdam ko ngayon na lang ulit ako ginanahan kumain. Ilang araw din akong nawalan ng gana dahil sa pag-iisip ng mga kung ano-anong bagay.

Pakiramdam ko mabilis kong naubos ang isang burger at nakulangan ako, buti na lang tatlo ang dala ni Xanthos. Halos ’di ko namalayan na naubos ko na pala ang lahat ng ’yon.

“Kiara, don’t sleep yet. You ate too much burger, you might have a stomachache,” Xanthos said when he saw me laid my back on the backrest and closed my eyes.

“I’m sleepy,” I muttered.

“You haven’t brushed your teeth yet.” Xanthos sighed.

Naramdaman kong binuhat ako ni Xanthos. Napakapit na lang ako sa batok n’ya nang magtungo siya papuntang banyo. Pinaupo n’ya ako sa sink at halos siya na ang nag-toothbrush sa ’kin dahil napapapikit na ’ko sa antok. Muli n’ya naman akong binuhat at dinala sa kwarto saka marahang pinahiga sa kama.

Naramdaman kong kinumutan n’ya muna ako bago siya lumabas ng kwarto.

“Hmm…” I slowly opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. Pakiramdam ko nawawala na naman ang antok ko nang pumasok sa isip ko ang mga nangyari sa buhay ko.

Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at napatitig sa kisame. Hindi ko na alam ang nangyayari sa buhay ko ngayon. Pakiramdam ko sobrang daming nangyari simula ng dumating si Xanthos sa buhay ko.

Napayakap ako nang mahigpit sa unan. Kahit pala anong pilit kong h’wag isipin ang lahat, hindi ko ’yon mapipigilan. Mahina ako sa mga ganitong bagay, noon pa man mahina na talaga akong tao… I’m emotionally and mentally weak and those traits of mine can harm my child. I should stop it, I should be strong not just for myself but also for my child.

I sighed and closed my eyes tightly. I should just stop thinking about anything. I’ll just relax. I will try to relax, I know I can do it.

“Kiara.”

Natigilan ako nang makita si Xanthos na nakasandal sa pinto ng kwarto. Napakurap na lang ako nang mapagtantong hindi pala siya umalis ng kwarto.

Lumapit siya sa ’kin. Napatitig na lang ako sa kanya nang marahan n’yang inilapat ang palad n’ya sa noo ko habang nakatingin sa ibang direksyon.

“Stop thinking about stressful things, Kiara. Your mind deserve a rest,” sabi n’ya habang hindi pa rin nakatingin sa akin.

“Xanthos…”

“I’m sorry for causing you pain that you don’t deserve. I know I’m close-minded, I’m selfish, I’m not a good man… and the fact that I’m the father of your child is too dangerous for someone like you… but please give me a chance. I… I want to be a good father.”

Hindi maalis ang titig ko kay Xanthos. Naramdaman kong bahagyang nanginginig ang kamay n’yang nakalapat sa noo ko. Napalunok ako nang maramdaman kong tila nagwawala ang puso ko dahil sa mga binitiwan n’yang salita.

I don’t know if I should trust him this time… but unvoluntarily, my heart trusts his words, his eyes, his actions… and I hate myself for it.

“I-I know you won’t say something like that if I’m not pregnant,” I muttered in a soft voice.

Xanthos finally looked at me. I gulped and stared at him too with equal intensity as his.

“I will still apologize to you even if you’re not pregnant,” he said and finally removed his hand on my forehead. “Go to sleep now. Stop making me worry,” sabi n’ya pa bago siya tuluyang lumabas ng silid.

Pakiramdam ko tila may kung anong humaplos sa puso ko. Simpleng salita lang ’yon galing sa kanya pero sapat na para mapagaan ang pakiramdam ko.

Napayakap na lang muli ako sa unan at napatitig sa kisame… Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko at napailing. Sa mga oras na ’to, naglalaban ang puso at isip ko kung dapat ko bang pagkatiwalaan ulit si Xanthos o hindi.

Chapter Twenty-Six

TRIGGER WARNING: RAPE AND MURDER

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Xanthos Archante

Wala akong pakialam kahit pa habang buhay pa kaming mamuhay ng mahirap, wala akong pakialam kahit minsan wala kaming makain, wala akong pakialam sa kahit anong sitwasyon… basta kasama namin si nanay. Lahat kakayanin ko.

“Nay, nasaan po ang tatay namin ni Xanthos?”

Napatingin kami ni nanay kay Xceron na abala sa paggawa ng pamaypay. Naiinis na binato ko siya ng basahan na nasa tabi ko.

“Sabing tawagin mo ’kong kuya, e!” sabi ko na lang para malayo ang usapan sa tatay namin. “Nay, tingnan n’yo naman po si Ronron, hindi na po nakakatuwa,” paghihimutok ko.

“Eh bakit mo ba kasi ako tinatawag na Ronron? Ang ganda ganda ng pangalan ko, e,” nakangusong sabi ni Xceron saka binato ako ng pamaypay.

Natawa na lang si nanay habang pinapanood kami. Napatigil siya sa paggawa ng pamaypay at lumapit sa ’min saka niyakap kami.

“Kayo talagang dalawa ang nagtatanggal ng lahat ng pagod ko. Alam n’yo ba ’yon, mga baby ko?” nakangiting tanong ni nanay saka pinupog kami ng halik sa pisngi.

“Nay naman, binata na po ako,” sabi ko na lang saka bahagyang tinulak si nanay.

“Anong binata? Gusto mong kurutin ko ’yang singit mo? Hindi pa binata ang 15 years old,” napapailing na sabi ni nanay.

Ang totoo n’yan madalas akong mapagkamalang 12 years old o pababa dahil maliit ako para sa edad ko. Nasabi sa ’kin ni nanay na kinulang ako sa buwan noong pinagbubuntis n’ya pa lang ako kaya masyado akong maliit at mahina kumpara kay Xceron kahit mas bata siya sa ’kin ng dalawang taon. Madalas din akong magkasakit kaya palaging napapagod si nanay pagdating sa pag-aalaga sa ’kin.

Gusto ko na agad lumaki para ako naman ang mag-aalaga sa kanya, sa kanila ni Xceron. Kapag lumaki na ’ko, hindi ko na hahayaang mapagod si nanay at magtrabaho.

“Xanthos, Xceron… pasensya na kung kailangan n’yo munang tumigil sa pag-aaral ngayong taon ha? Babawi si nanay next school year. Ibibili ko kayo ng maraming notebook kaya dapat top 1 ulit kayo next year,” nakangiting sabi ni nanay saka hinaplos ang buhok namin ni Xceron.

“Nay, okay lang naman po sa ’min. Basta po magkakasama tayo lagi,” sabi ni Xceron at nag-thumbs up pa.

Napangiti si nanay. “Siyempre gagawin ko pa rin lahat para mapag-aral kayo. Kasi diba may mga pangarap kayo? Ano nga ulit ’yon?” tanong ni nanay.

“Nay, pangarap ko po maging macho na pulis tapos ipagtatanggol ko ang mga naaapi tapos ikukulong ko ’yung masasamang tao,” mayabang na sabi ko. Natawa naman sina nanay.

“Ako ’nay, pangarap ko po maging superhero kagaya ni Superman!” sabi naman ni Xceron. Binato ko siya ng pamaypay.

“Hindi naman pinag-aaralan sa school ’yon, e. Saka hindi na kailangan ng superhero kung may pulis na katulad ko,” sabi ko na lang.

Natatawa na lang si nanay habang pinapanood kami. Bahagya n’yang ginulo ang buhok namin ni Xceron.

“Ako naman ang nanay ng future macho na pulis at superhero kaya kailangan mas magsipag ako para matupad n’yo ang mga pangarap n’yo. Kaya kapag pumasok na kayo sa school next year, galingan n’yo ulit. Okay?” nakangiting tanong ni nanay.

“Opo, ’nay!” sabay na sagot naman namin ni Xceron.

Wala kaming reklamo ni Xceron sa simpleng pamumuhay namin. Walang ibang importante sa ’min kundi si nanay. Maski sa tatay namin wala na rin kaming pakialam. Pangalan lang ang alam namin sa kanya, ni hindi namin alam kung ano’ng hitsura n’ya at kahit hindi sabihin ni nanay… alam naming inabandona kami ng tatay namin.

“Hello, kayo ba ang mga anak ni Cerniah?”

Nagtatakang napatingin kami ni Xceron sa lalaking lumabas ng kotse. May dala siyang mga pagkain at tsokolate. Napakunot na lang ang noo ko at hinawakan ang kamay ni Xceron at ipinwesto siya sa likuran ko kahit pa di hamak na mas matangkad siya sa akin.

Wala si nanay ngayon kaya ako ang bantay sa bahay. Sinabi n’ya na h’wag kaming magtiwala sa hindi namin kilala.

“Sino po kayo?” nakakunot-noong tanong ko.

“Ako si Kairo, tawagin n’yo na lang akong Tito Kairo,” nakangiting sabi ng lalaki.

“Bakit ka po namin tatawaging Tito? Kapatid ka po ba ni nanay?” tanong ko pa.

Natawa na lang ang lalaking nagngangalang Kairo at napakamot sa batok n’ya.

“That’s not what I mean.”

Natigilan kami ni Xceron nang dumating na si nanay. Agad kaming tumakbo papalapit sa kanya at yumakap sa bewang n’ya. Napangiti naman siya at hinaplos ang buhok namin.

Natigilan si nanay nang mapatingin sa lalaking Kairo ang pangalan.

“S-Sir Kairo, bakit po kayo napadaan dito?” sabi na lang ni nanay.

Lumapit ang Kairo na ’yon sa amin at inabot kay nanay ang mga dala n’yang kung ano-ano. Nagkatinginan naman kaming dalawa ni Xceron.

“Pwede ba tayong mag-usap, Cerniah?” tanong ng lalaki.

Napabuntonghininga si nanay at napatingin sa amin ni Xceron.

“Mga anak, pumasok muna kayo sa bahay… Kakausapin ko lang ang amo ko,” sabi na lang ni nanay.

Kahit ayaw namin, napilitan kaming sumunod ni Xceron at pumasok sa loob. Ngunit nanatili kaming nakadungaw para marinig ang usapan nila.

“Cerniah, seryoso ako sa sinabi ko noong nakaraan. Mahal talaga kita, hayaan mo ’kong ligawan ka.”

Agad na napakunot ang noo ko. Sabi na nga ba at may iba akong pakiramdam sa Kairo na ’yon. Maganda ang nanay namin kaya alam ko kaagad na may crush siya kay nanay.

Wala namang kaso sa amin ni Xceron kung magkakaroon si nanay ng bagong asawa… basta ba hindi n’ya sasaktan si nanay, walang kaso sa amin.

“Sir, may asawa’t anak na po kayo. Ayoko pong makasira ng pamilya at isa pa, wala na po akong balak na pumasok sa relasyon ulit,” sagot naman ni nanay.

Napakuyom ang kamao ko. Aba, may asawa’t anak na pala siya pero may crush siya kay nanay. Ayoko na sa Kairo na ’yan para kay nanay.

“Sabi ko naman sa ’yo na handa akong hiwalayan si Akira. Alam mo rin naman na hindi namin mahal ang isa’t isa umpisa pa lang… Please, Cerniah, please give me a chance. Handa akong akuin ang mga anak mo, kahi ano gagawin ko. I really love you, Cerniah,” sabi ng lalaki saka hinawakan ang kamay ni nanay.

Napabuntonghininga si nanay at marahang inalis ang pagkakahawak ng Kairo na ’yon sa kanya.

“Sorry po talaga, Sir. Nasa mga anak ko lang po ang atensyon ko ngayon. Sila lang po ang gusto kong pagtuunan ng pansin. Wala po akong panahon sa mga ganitong bagay, Sir. Pasensya na po,” sabi na lang ni nanay.

Hindi na namin nakita ulit ang Kairo na ’yon pagkatapos no’n. Ayaw na rin naman namin sa kanya dahil may pamilya na pala siya pero gusto n’ya pa ring ligawan si nanay.

Pero isang araw… lahat nagbago sa buhay naming lahat.

“Nay! Nay! N-Nawawala po si Xceron!” naluluhang sabi ko nang makitang wala na si Xceron sa labas ng bahay.

Sinubukan ko na rin siyang hanapin sa mga posibleng lugar na pwede n’yang puntahan pero wala siya ro’n.

“A-Ano? Nawawala ang kapatid mo?” tanong ni nanay. Tila ito ang unang beses na nakita ko siyang namutla nang ganito.

Dali daling lumabas ng bahay si nanay at nagsuot ng tsinelas. Napalingon siya sa ’kin at hinaplos ang pisngi ko.

“Anak, h’wag kang aalis ha. B-Babalik ako rito na kasama ko na si Xceron. H’wag na h’wag kang aalis, dito ka lang.”

Kahit hindi ako mapalagay, sinunod ko ang sinabi ni nanay at naghintay na lang sa bahay. Mahigit sampung oras din yata akong naghintay. May naiwang pagkain sa mesa pero hindi ko ’yon nagalaw…

…gusto ko sabay-sabay kaming tatlo na kakain sa mesa.

Natigilan ako nang dumating si nanay… pero hindi n’ya kasama si Xceron. Pero ang mas nagpagulat sa ’kin ay ang hitsura n’ya pagkauwi n’ya.

Sira sira ang damit ni nanay na halos nakahubad na siya. May mga pasa at sugat sa ilang parte ng katawan n’ya at mukhang hinang hina siya. Hindi rin nakawala sa paningin ko ang lumuluha n’yang mga mata.

“Nay! A-Ano pong nangyari sa ’yo? S-Sinong gunawa nito sa ’yo, nay?!” naluluhang tanong ko habang binabalutan siya ng towel.

Nanginginig na napayakap si nanay sa sarili n’ya habang lumuluha. Pakiramdam ko pati ako nasasaktan habang nakatingin sa kalagayan n’ya ngayon. Galit na galit ako, nangingitngit ang kalooban ko habang nakikita si nanay na umiiyak at mukhang takot na takot.

Kinse anyos pa lang ako pero may ideya na ako kung ano ang nangyari sa kanya… at kapag naiisip ko na tama ang hinala ko, lalong nagliliyab ang galit sa puso ko.

Anong karapatan nilang pahirapan at paglaruan ng ganito ang nanay ko?

“Nay! A-Ano pong nangyari? S-Sabihin mo sa ’kin…”

Napapikit nang mariin si nanay at napahagulgol ng iyak. “G-Ginahasa ako ni Sir Kairo…” naluluhang usal ni nanay.

Bumigat ang paghinga ko sa sinabi n’ya. Hindi ko na namalayan na nanlalabo na rin ang paningin ko dahil sa mga luha. Agad kong niyakap si nanay habang lumuluha.

Kunalas din agad si nanay sa pagkakayakap sa ’kin at tumingin nang diretso sa mga mata ko.

“P-Pupunta ako ng presinto para magsampa ng kaso… dito ka lang sa bahay, Xanthos. H’wag kang aalis, h-hintayin mo at magbaka-sakali ka na darating si Xceron dito.”

Napailing ako at kumapit sa braso n’ya.

“S-Sasamahan po kita, nay. Paano kung may mangyaring masama sa ’yo? H-Hindi po ako papayag na umalis ka mag-isa,” sabi ko at pilit na humawak sa braso n’ya.

Walang nagawa si nanay kundi ang isama ako. Nagmamadali kaming umalis ng bahay para magtungo sa presinto… pero hindi pa kami nakakarating do’n, nakaaninag na si nanay ng tatlong kotse na papalapit sa amin.

Agad na napaatras si nanay. Nanginginig na itinulak n’ya ako sa malapit na poste na tila itinatago n’ya ako ro’n.

“H’wag na h’wag kang aalis d’yan, Xanthos. K-Kahit anong mangyari, kahit ano pa’ng makita mo, h’wag na h’wag kang aalis diyan, anak…” naluluhang sabi ni nanay at iniharang ang basurahan sa akin at pinaupo ako para magtago ro’n.

Pakiramdam ko kailangan kong sundin ang sinabi n’ya kaya tumango na lang ako kahit mabigat sa loob ko.

Hinabol ko na lang ng tingin si nanay nang agad n’ya akong iniwan sa poste at sinalubong ang tatlong kotse na tumigil sa harapan n’ya. Sumilip ako sa nangyayari, gustong gusto ko ng lumabas at lapitan si nanay.

Napansin kong may sinasabi ang matandang lalaki na nasa unahan. May sinasabi siya kay nanay na hindi ko marinig, gano’n din naman si nanay at mukhang may sinasabi sa kanya.

Sino ba ang matandang ’yon?

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko kasabay ng pagdilim ng lahat sa paligid ko nang walang habas na binaril ng lalaki si nanay. Agad na nanginig ang buong katawan ko nang limang beses pa yata nitong binaril ang nanay ko.

Pakiramdam ko tumigil sa pagtibok ang puso ko nang bumagsak ang duguang katawan ni nanay sa sahig.

Tila wala na ’kong pakialam sa bilin ni nanay. Nanginginig na lumabas ako sa pinagtataguan ko at nagkukumahog na tumakbo papunta kay nanay.

“N-Nanay!” hiyaw ko at agad na nilapitan si nanay at niyakap ang duguang katawan n’ya.

“Sir, may bata pala. Anak yata ni Cerniah ’yan, anong gagawin natin?” tanong ng lalaking kasama ng matandang bumaril kay nanay.

“Just let him be… wala rin naman siyang magagawa,” walang emosyon na sabi ng matanda at sumakay sa kotse at pinaharurot ’yon.

Naiwan kami ni nanay nang umalis na silang lahat.

“N-Nay, gising ka… g-gumising ka, nay… p-pakiusap.” Hinubad ko ang damit ko at itinapal ’yon sa duguang katawan ni nanay.

Patuloy akong naluha at pilit na tinatakpan ang dugong tumatagas mula sa katawan ni nanay kahit na alam kong wala ’yong magagawa.

“X-Xanthos…” nanghihinang sabi ni nanay at hinawakan ang kamay ko na tila pinapatigil n’ya ako sa ginagawa ko.

“N-Nay, h’wag ka na pong magsalita. D-Dadalhin kita sa ospital. P-Please, ’nay, h’wag kang pipikit. Nagmamakaawa ako, nay…”

Nanginginig na ang buong katawan ko sa takot. Takot na takot ako ngayon, hindi ko na rin mapigilan ang mga luhang patuloy na umaalpas mula sa mga mata ko.

“X-Xanthos… m-mahal na mahal k-ko kayo ni Xceron. M-Mahal na mahal ko kayo…” tuluyan ng napapikit si nanay matapos n’yang sabihin ’yon.

Pakiramdam ko tumigil ang lahat sa paligid ko nang mapagtantong hindi na humihinga si nanay. Nanginginig ang mga kamay na inilapat ko pa rin ang damit ko sa dumudugo n’yang katawan habang umiiyak nang malakas.

“Aaah! Nay! N-Nay gumising ka! Tulong! T-Tulungan n’yo kami! Nay!” Hindi ko na makilala ang sarili kong boses. Patuloy akong sumisigaw pero parang walang nakakarinig sa ’min.

Sumigaw ako nang sumigaw hanggang sa maubusan ako ng boses. Patuloy kong pinagdarasal na sana magising na ’ko sa bangungot na ’to… pero ang walang buhay na katawan ni nanay na nasa mga bisig ko ang nagpatunay sa ’kin na nasa masakit na katotohanan ako.

---

“Pinatay n’ya ang nanay ko! K-Kitang kita ko na pinatay n’ya si nanay! Bakit ayaw mong maniwala sa ’kin?!”

Lumapit ako sa abogado at kinwelyuhan siya. Nanginginig ang buong katawan ko sa galit habang naluluha. Napabuntonghininga naman ang abogado at inalis ang pagkakahawak ko sa damit n’ya.

“Kilala mo ba ang pinagbibintangan mo, bata? Si Aldovino North ang pinagbibintangan mo. Bakit naman n’ya papatayin ang nanay mo? Wala siyang mapapala ro’n,” tila wala lang na sabi nito.

Napakuyom ang kamao ko kasabay ng bumibigat kong paghinga.

“Wala akong pakialam kung sino pa siya! Gusto kong makulong siya! I-Ipapakulong ko siya!” hiyaw ko at binato ang lahat ng gamit na nasa mesa.

Napabuntonghininga ang abogado at tinapik ang balikat ko.

“Kumalma ka muna, hijo. Pag-isipan mo munang maigi ang mga binibitiwan mong salita,” sabi ng abogado bago ako iniwan.

Mabigat ang loob ko sa nangyayari. Alam kong ganito sila dahil wala kaming pera… pero gusto ko pa rin umasa na mapagbabayaran ng mga hayop na ’yon ang ginawa nila sa nanay ko.

“Matigas ang ulo ng batang ’yon, Sir. Desidido talaga siya na tumestigo laban sa ’yo.”

Natigilan ako habang nakikinig sa usapan ng abogado at ng matandang ’yon na pumatay kay nanay. Sinundan ko ang abogadong may hawak ng kaso ni nanay at nakita ko siyang nagtungo sa isang coffee shop kausap ang hayop na pumatay kay nanay. Napakuyom ang kamao ko habang nakatingin nang masama sa kanila… sabi na nga ba at magkasabwat silang dalawa.

Agad ko silang sinugod. Binato ko ng bato ang ulo ng Aldovino na ’yon. Napasinghap naman ang mga tao sa paligid namin.

Kinaladkad nila ako palabas. Hindi naman nagsalita ang matanda na tila wala lang sa kanya ang ginawa kong pagbato sa kanya. Lumapit siya sa ’kin at hinarap ako. Nanatili naman akong nakatingin nang masama sa kanya habang pilit na nagpupumiglas sa hawak sa ’kin ng mga tauhan n’ya.

“Hindi ka ba nagtataka kung nasaan ang kapatid mo?” tanong n’ya.

Pakiramdam ko natulos ako sa kinatatayuan ko.

“Kung gusto mong makita ulit ang kapatid mo, mamuhay ka ng tahimik at kalimutan ang nangyari… naiintindihan mo ba?”

Wala akong naging laban nang banggitin n’ya ang kapatid ko. Pakiramdam ko sobrang hina ko na hindi ko man lang magawang malaman kung nasaan si Xceron…Wala akong laban sa lahat, wala akong laban kay Aldovino North.

“Iyan na ang kapatid mo. Mas maganda kung mananahimik na lang kayong magkapatid. Magpasalamat kayo at naawa pa sa inyo si Sir Aldovino.”

Itinulak ng isang lalaki si Xceron palabas ng kotse nila saka agad na umalis. Agad ko namang nasalo ang kapatid ko. Nanginig ang buong katawan ko nang makitang maraming sugat at pasa sa katawan si Xceron na tila ba binugbog siya ng mga ’yon.

Nakuyom ko ang kamao ko habang puno ng galit na lumuluha. Kahit na mabigat si Xceron. Pinilit ko siyang ipasan sa likod ko at dinala sa bahay.

TULALA AKONG naglakad palayo sa sa bahat. Gusto ko munang mapag-isa saglit hangga’t hindi pa nagigising si Xceron. Nagtungo ako sa tahimik na lugar at umupo habang nakatitig sa papalubog na araw.

Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko. Sobrang bigat na para sa ’kin ng lahat.

“Xanthos Dela Paz…”

Natigilan ako nang maramdaman kong may umupo sa tabi ko ngunit hindi ako nag-abalang tingnan kung sino ’yon… wala na ’kong lakas, wala na ’kong pakialam.

“Hindi madaling kalabanin si Aldovino North, ’di ba?” tanong pa ng lalaki.

Hindi na lang ako nagsalita.

“Gusto mo bang maghiganti?”

Natigilan ako sa tanong n’ya. Walang emosyon na napatingin ako sa kanya. Hindi pamilyar sa ’kin ang lalaking nasa harapan ko ngayon. Hindi ko rin alam kung bakit kilala n’ya ako pero wala na ’kong pakialam do’n.

Napangisi ang lalaki. “I like the look in your eyes, Xanthos Dela Paz. Your eyes look lifeless, but it has unbearable wrath and anger deep inside.”

Hindi ko pinansin ang sinabi n’yang ’yon.

“Paano ako maghihiganti? Paano ko sila magagawang pagbayarin sa ginawa nila? Sabihin mo sa ’kin, paano sila magdurusa sa mga kamay ko?” sunod-sunod na tanong ko.

Napangiti ang lalaki. “Before that, I’ll introduce myself first. I’m Zachariah Cavalcante… tutulungan kitang maghiganti sa mga taong ’yon sa abot ng makakaya ko.”

SA HINDI inaasahang pangyayari, biglaang nagparamdam si Xavion Archante… siya ang tatay namin ni Xceron. Sinabi n’ya na gusto n’ya kaming dalhin sa poder n’ya.

“Ano’ng nararamdaman mo sa tatay mo?” tanong ni Zachariah.

“Galit,” malamig na sagot ko.

Napangisi siya. “Gawin mo kung ano’ng dapat mong gawin. Sundin mo ang halimaw sa loob mo.”

Sumama kami ni Xceron kay Xavion Archante. Naging malinaw sa ’kin na kinuha n’ya lang kami dahil kailangan n’ya ng magmamana ng kayamanan n’ya.

Balak n’yang hati-hatiin ang kayamanan n’ya sa ’min pati na rin sa iba n’ya pang kamag-anak… pero wala akong pakialam. Sisiguruhin ko na sa amin lang ni Xceron mapupunta ang lahat ng ’yon.

“Xavion Archante…” mariing sabi ko habang nakatitig sa kanya na mahina na at nakahiga na lang sa malaking kama n’ya.

Halatang natigilan siya sa sinabi ko.

“Magpahinga ka na ngayon, matulog ka na at h’wag ka ng gigising. H’wag kang mag-alala dahil pakikinabangan ko ang lahat ng pera mo,” walang emosyon na sabi ko habang malamig na nakatitig sa kanya.

Napasapo si Xavion sa dibdib n’ya marahil sa gulat dahil sa mga sinabi ko.

Inilapit ko ang labi ko sa tainga n’ya at binulungan siya.

“Ang lakas ng loob mong kuhanin kami ni Xceron para pakinabangan matapos mong abandonahin at hayaang mamatay si nanay… ang tigas din naman ng mukha mong putangina ka.”

Walang emosyon na nakatitig lang ako kay Xavion hanggang sa mga huling sandali ng buhay n’ya. Wala akong naramdamang lungkot o kahit ano… siguro nga talagang unti unti ko ng naaalis ang lahat ng hindi mahalagang emosyon sa loob ko.

---

I became more heartless and merciless. I can’t even recognize myself anymore. I let my monster took over to reach my only goal in life.

Kairo and Aldovino North made me like this… And they have to pay for it in the most painful way possible.

“Bakit mo hinahanap ang bahay ni Atty. Berosa? Kilala mo ba siya?” Cad asked and puffed on his cigarette.

“Mind your own business,” I said and took my gun.

“Ah, still cold as ever, huh,” Cad said and laughed.

I went inside Atty. Berosa’s house easily. His guards are weak as fuck. They didn’t even make me sweat.

I reached his room. I kicked the door that it almost flew inside his room. Atty. Berosa woke up. He gasped and immediately stood up.

“S-Sino ka?! A-Ano’ng kailangan mo sa ’kin?!”

I grinned and walk my way inside his room. “You’re hurting my feelings, attorney… How could you forget me?”

I can’t blame him. My built drastically changed over the years. I trained hard for my goal, I made myself physically strong to achieve what I want to accomplish.

“I’m Xanthos Dela Paz, attorney. Do you not remember my mother, Cerniah Dela Paz, anymore? You were the attorney of her case before… right?”

I felt his body trembled in fear while staring at me. I smirked when I felt a satisfying feeling within me seeing him tremble with fear.

“T-That was a long time ago… M-Magkano ba ang gusto mo? Babayaran kita kahit magkano… P-Pakiusap, h’wag mo lang akong patayin.”

Inilabas ko ang baril ko at ikinasa ’yon saka itinutok sa kanya. Atty. Berosa’s eyes widened in fear. I just smiled at him before I buried the bullets in his head five times.

“I don’t need your money, asshole.”

I came back to my job after killing Atty. Berosa. I honestly want to kill Kairo and Aldovino now but I want to save the worst people for last. I have to prepare for it and make sure I’ll execute it perfectly.

I’ll make them suffer… without mercy.

I OPENED my eyes while catching my breath. I sighed and massaged my temple, trying to calm myself.

It’s the same nightmare again. I never had a peaceful sleep for almost 20 years. Everything is haunting me every time I close my eyes… I’m really hopeless.

I sighed and stared at the night sky. If Zachariah Cavalcante is still alive… he’ll be disappointed in me.

I just shook my head and went inside. I took a shower to calm myself even a little bit. I sighed and stared at myself in the mirror.

I stared at my almost fully-tattoed body. I started having those tattoos because I want to feel physical pain, I want my emotional pain to be substituted by physical pain. Halos hindi ko na namalayan na napupuno na no’n ang katawan ko sa mga nakalipas na taon.

I promised to myself that I’ll stop having tattoos when I finally reached my goal… when I’m finally happy.

I sighed and shook my head. I just wore pajamas and didn’t bother to wear something to cover my tattooed body. I went to Kiara’s room and I saw her peacefully sleeping while hugging my pillow.

Lumapit ako sa kanya at umupo sa tabi n’ya. I fixed her blanket and gently caressed her hair.

I smiled when I suddenly realized that her peaceful face can help me calm down. It feels like my heart is at peace even for a moment.

Before, I should have realized too that I only get to sleep peacefully without nightmares and sleep paralysis every time she’s sleeping beside me.

Maybe because I don’t want to admit it to myself. I can’t accept the fact that Kairo North’s daughter can give comfort to my existence… It was foolish. It was ironic.

“Hmm…” Kiara groaned and hugged the pillow tighter.

I just smiled while staring at her. Cadence is right, I’m the most in denial person. Even at this moment, even if I’m unconsciously smiling while staring at her, my mind is still denying what Kiara can do to my system… but I guess there’s really nothing I can do now. I’m so helpless.

And maybe… I should stop having tattoos now.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

I only stayed at Xanthos’ place for one week. I stayed at Abi’s unit after that. Gulat na gulat siya nang malamang buntis ako. Nagtanong din siya kung bakit ayaw kong umuwi sa bahay pero hindi ko na lang sinabi ang totoong dahilan sa kanya. Ayaw ko na rin naman kasing pag-usapan pa ’yon.

Even though we’re having a child, Xanthos and I have separate lives. Hinahayaan ko naman siya na bisitahin ako sa unit ni Denise. Kung minsan nagdadala siya ng mga pagkain o prutas kung minsan naman si Denise ang pinapapunta n’ya. Mas maganda na rin ang malayo kami sa isa’t isa ni Xanthos, ito ang tamang desisyon.

Maraming nangyari habang buntis ako. Nang mahigit apat na buwan na ’kong buntis, nagpa-ultrasound ako kasama ni Xanthos at doon namin nalaman na kambal ang anak namin. Sa mga oras na ’yon, nakita ko ang kakaibang emosyon sa mga mata ni Xanthos. Tila ba masaya siya na kambal ang anak namin.

Si Dad naman, ipinakulong n’ya ang sarili n’ya para pagbayaran ang kasalanan nila ni Lolo sa nanay ni Xanthos. Xanthos didn’t say anything about it to me. I don’t know if he purposely avoid the topic about it because he doesn’t want it to be the cause of my stress or maybe… he doesn’t care about it anymore.

I don’t want to see or visit my Dad at the prison. Si manang na lang ang nabisita kay Dad. Nasabi rin sa ’kin ni manang na alam na ni Dad na buntis ako at masaya siya para sa ’kin. Hindi ko alam kung masasabi n’ya pa rin ’yon kapag nalaman n’yang si Xanthos ang tatay ng magiging anak ko.

Mabilis na lumipas ang siyam na buwan. Kinakabahan ako nang sobra nang dumating na ang araw na ipapanganak ko na ang kambal. Alam kong hindi na kami malapit ni Xanthos tulad noon pero napilitan akong humawak sa kamay n’ya at doon kumuha ng lakas. Nararamdaman kong hinahaplos n’ya ang buhok ko na tila pinapakalma ako. Wala siyang sinasabi, nanatili siyang tahimik pero ipinapakita n’ya sa bawat kilos n’ya ang pagpapalakas ng loob ko sa mga oras na ’to.

Pakiramdam ko bawing bawi ang sakit na dinanas ko sa panganganak nang marinig ko ang iyak ng kambal. Napangiti ako at nanghihinang napakapit sa kamay ni Xanthos. Naramdaman ko rin na marahan n’yang pinisil ang kamay ko.

“I’m proud of you, Kiara…” narinig kong sabi ni Xanthos bago ako pumikit at tuluyang hinila ng antok.

NANG MAGISING ako, nasa tabi ko na ang kambal. Napangiti ako habang nakatingin sa dalawang anghel na habang buhay na magpapasaya sa ’kin. Ito ang unang beses na nakita ko sila pero pakiramdam ko, sobrang mahal ko sila na handa akong gawin lahat para sa kanila.

I looked at Xanthos beside me. He’s staring at our children too as if his world revolves around them. Mukha siyang pagod at walang tulog pero tila hindi n’ya alintana ’yon. Nakatitig siya sa mga anak namin na para bang sapat na ’yon para mawala ang lahat ng pagod na nararamdaman n’ya.

“Do you want to carry them?” I asked him. Xanthos gulped and shook his head.

“I-I don’t know how to, they look delicate. I don’t want to hurt them,” he murmured in a soft voice.

I just smiled and held my little girl’s hand. Hinawakan ko naman ang kamay ni Xanthos at inilapit ’yon sa anak naming lalaki. Agad na nanginig ang kamay n’ya. Napangiti na lang ako sa reaksyon n’ya na para bang takot na takot siyang hawakan ang mga anak namin.

“What will be their name?” I asked.

We haven’t talk about their names yet. I don’t want to decide about it without consulting him first. He’s still their father.

“Do you have something in mind?” he asked and looked at me.

“Hmm, I want to name our little girl Xianariah, and this cute boy will be Xevan… Xianariah and Xevan Archante,” I said and looked at my babies. Xanthos is right, they really look delicate.

Xanthos smiled and nodded. “Then that will be their name,” he mumbled and touched Xianariah’s small hand.

Dumating din kaagad sina Cadence at halos pagkaguluhan nila kami lalo na ang kambal. Gusto pa sana n’yang buhatin si Xevan pero agad siyang tiningnan nang masama ni Xanthos.

“Ninong nila ako, pareng Xanthos. Please h’wag epal,” sabi ni Cad saka muling tumingin sa kambal.

“Hala ang cute talaga nila, parang bola,” sabi naman ni Denise habang nakikipagtulakan kay Cad dahil masyado itong nakaharang sa kambal.

“OMG, I’m gonna be a Tita now!” Abi said and clapped her hands.

May dumating din na dalawang lalaki na hindi pamilyar sa ’kin. The other man has blue pair of eyes, he looks like a foreigner. Napatingin ako sa isang lalaki at pilit na inalala kung saan ko siya nakita… natigilan ako nang maalala kong Eron ang pangalan n’ya. Nagpunta na siya sa unit ni Cad noon.

“Congrats, pareng Xanthos. Magbagong buhay ka na,” sabi ni Eron saka tinapik ang balikat ni Xanthos. “By the way, do you still remember me, Kiara?” tanong ni Eron sa ’kin. Napangiti na lang ako at tumango.

The other unfamiliar man tapped Xanthos’ shoulder too. “Take good care of them, Xanthos.”

“Hala, kilala mo ba ’yung poging ’yon, Kiara?” bulong ni Abi sa ’kin saka itinuro ang lalaking may asul na mga mata. “Si Director Zakarius Cavalcante ’yan. OMG, bakit ang daming gwapong kaibigan ni Cad?” tila kinikilig na sabi ni Abi. Natatawang napailing na lang ako.

Xanthos and I live together again. Bumalik ako sa pad n’ya para parehas naming maalagaan ang kambal. I can see that Xanthos is really trying his best to be a good father. I never heard him complain even though he’s always tired from work and taking care of our twin. He actually looks happy every time he’s with Xiana and Xevan.

I can say that I’m still lucky that he’s the father of my children.

Nang tumungtong na sa tatlong taon ang edad nina Xiana at Xevan. Napagdesisyunan kong humiwalay ulit kay Xanthos. Ayokong masanay sa presensa n’ya, ayokong masanay na magkasama kami, ayokong mahalin siya ulit. Gusto kong manatiling mga magulang nina Xiana at Xevan ang relasyon namin… at hindi na hihigit pa ro’n.

Nagkaroon kami ng schedule ni Xanthos sa pag-aalaga kina Xiana. Linggo linggo kaming naghahalinhinang mag-alaga sa kambal. Walang naging reklamo si Xanthos sa lahat ng naging desisyon ko. Sa unit ni Denise ako natuloy ngayon, gusto ko sana na kumuha ng sarili kong unit pero pinilit ako ni Denise na sa kanya na lang tumira dahil mag-isa lang siya. Napamahal na rin kasi siya sa kambal.

Itinuloy ko naman ang trabaho ko sa kompanya nina Abi at direktang nagtrabaho sa kuya n’ya na si Archer. Buti na lang at mabait siya at naiintindihan n’ya ang schedule ko sa pag-aalaga sa mga anak ko. Kung minsan nga binibisita n’ya rin ang kambal at binibili ng kung ano-ano.

Mahirap ang set up namin ni Xanthos ngayon pero mas mabuti na ’yon kaysa ang tumira kami nang magkasama. Ayokong magaya sa ’kin ang mga anak namin. Lumaki ako na akala ko masayang pamilya kami. Ayokong paniwalain ang mga anak ko sa hindi totoo.

Habang lumalaki ang kambal, mas lalo nilang nagiging kamukha si Xanthos. Maski ang buhok nila ay nakuha rin nila kay Xanthos. Hindi naman ako nagrereklamo, mahal na mahal ko pa rin naman sila… medyo nakakatampo lang talaga sa side ko.

Nang tumungtong na sa limang taon ang edad ng kambal, nagsimula na silang magtaka sa sitwasyon namin ni Xanthos, lalo na si Xianariah.

Xiana hugged my waist. “Mama, I don’t understand po… Bakit po separate kayo ng house ni Papa? Sabi sa school namin ang family nasa iisang house together. Bakit po hindi na lang tayo magsama-sama para po hindi na namin kailangan magpalipat-lipat ni Kuya Xevan every week?” Xiana asked.

Hindi talaga nagdadalawang isip si Xiana na itanong at sabihin ang nasa isip n’ya kahit ano pa ’yon. Si Xevan naman ay tahimik lang sa tabi ng kambal n’ya. Salungat ni Xiana, hindi masyadong nagsasalita si Xevan. Alam kong gusto n’ya ring magtanong gaya ni Xiana pero mas pinipili n’ya ang manahimik.

“Baby, I already explained it to you before, right? Your father and I are not married or in love with each other… but we love you both and we’re doing our best to be good parent to you and Xevan, that’s what important, right?”

Xiana sighed and just nodded. I know she wants us to be together. I know this set up is hard for them too but I don’t want to end up falling in love with their father again. Ginawa ko ang lahat ng makakaya ko para maalis ang nararamdaman ko para kay Xanthos at ngayong hindi ko na siya mahal… ayokong gumawa ng bagay na maaaring magpabalik ng nararamdaman ko sa kanya noon.

“Hey, kids! Delivery time. Salubungin n’yo naman ang pinakapoging ninong n’yo,” sabi ni Cadence pagdating n’ya rito sa unit ni Denise.

“Ninong Cad!”

Agad na sinalubong ng yakap ng kambal si Cad. Napangiti na lang ako habang pinagmamasdan sila.

“Alam n’yo na, kids. Ihahatid ko na kayo sa pangit n’yong tatay. Excited na ba kayong makita ang Papa Xanthos n’yo?” tanong ni Cad at nagtaas-baba pa ng kilay.

“Opo! I want to see him now, we missed him,” Xiana said and pouted.

Lumapit na sa ’kin sina Xiana at Xevan para magpaalam. Napangiti na lang ako at pinupog sila ng halik. Napahagikhik naman sila at yumakap sa ’kin.

“Magpapakabait kayo sa Papa n’yo ha. I love you both my babies,” sabi ko saka muling hinalikan ang pisngi nila.

“Ops, okay na ’yan, mare. Halika na kayo, kids,” sabi ni Cad at binitbit ang bag ng kambal. “Bye, Kiarabog, see you next week!”

Si Cadence ang naghahatid sa mga bata kay Xanthos, si Denise naman ang naghahatid sa kanila rito. Kung iisipin, magulo talaga ang set up namin pero nasanay na rin naman kami sa ganito. Mahigit dalawang taon ng ganito ang sistema namin.

“Kiara, wala ba talaga kayong balak magbalikan ni Sir Xanthos?” tanong ni Denise habang nainom ng kape sa tabi ko.

I smiled and drank my coffee too. “We don’t love each other, Denise. I don’t want to be with him just because we have children. I don’t want to be in a loveless relationship. I know I’m being unfair to Xiana and Xevan but I don’t want to fool them with something like that. I experienced it before and it was terrible.”

Napabuntonghininga na lang si Denise saka napatango. “Ano kasi… diba hate ko si Sir Xanthos five years ago pero ngayon kasi naaawa ako sa kanya. Mukha siyang malungkot sa tuwing kinukuha ko na sa kanya ’yung kambal. Alam kong hindi lang nagsasabi si Sir pero alam kong gusto ka n’yang i-approach ulit. Diba sabi ko naman sa ’yo na nakikita kong mahal ka n’ya noon pa?”

Napailing na lang ako sa sinabi ni Denise. Hanggang ngayon hindi pa rin siya nasuko sa pag-iisip ng kung ano-ano tungkol sa nararamdaman ni Xanthos.

“Reading romance stuff is too bad for you,” natatawang sabi ko na lang sa kanya.

It’s impossible… and even if he does, that won’t be my problem anymore. I respect Xanthos as the father of my children and that’s it… nothing more, nothing less.

KINUMUSTA KO si Dad mula kay manang. Kahit galit ako sa kanya, binigyan ko pa rin siya ng litrato ng kambal at pinaabot ’yon kay manang. Sa tingin ko naman ay may karapatan pa rin siyang makita man lang ang mukha ng mga apo n’ya.

“Kiara…”

Napatingin ako kay Archer nang mapadaan siya sa opisina ko. Agad akong napangiti at sinalubong siya.

“Do you need something, Sir?” I asked him.

He tilted his head and scratched his nape. “How many times do I have to tell you that you don’t need to call me Sir? Just call me by my name,” tila may bahid ng pagtatampong sabi n’ya.

I shook my head. “You’re still my boss, Sir Archer.”

Archer just sighed and licked his lower lip. He took a deep breath as if he’s preeparing himself to say something.

“Ahm, Kiara… Can we have… ahm, dinner together?” he asked.

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Napatikhim ako at napaiwas ng tingin saka pilit na pinakalma ang sarili ko. Bakit naman kaya bigla siyang nagyayaya mag-dinner?

“Sure, I have free time.”

Pumayag ako sa pagyayaya n’yang mag-dinner kahit na medyo uncomfortable para sa ’kin. Masyado siyang mabait na siya na mismo ang nag-adjust sa schedule ko. Hindi n’ya pa rin ako inaalis sa trabaho kahit pa two weeks a month lang akong nakakapasok sa trabaho. Ayoko namang maging masama at tanggihan siya sa ganitong bagay.

“Kiara…”

Natigilan ako at napalingon kay Archer nang tawagin n’ya ’ko. Kakatapos lang namin mag-dinner at naglalakad lakad na lang kami dito sa labas.

“Hmm?” I asked and smiled at him.

“I love you,” he said while staring directly at me.

I literally froze with his confession. Inaasahan ko ng ganito ang nararamdaman n’ya para sa’kin pero hindi ko pa rin inaasahan na magagawa n’yang aminin ’yon sa ’kin.

“I-I don’t know what to say, Sir Archer… alam mong meron na ’kong mga anak at–”

“Does it matter?” tanong n’ya habang serysosong nakatingin sa ’kin. “I can take care of Xiana and Xevan too. I already love them and treat them as my children.”

Hindi ako nakasagot sa sinabi n’ya. Napatingin ako sa mga mata n’ya at wala akong makitang bahid ng pag-aalinlangan sa mga ’yon.

Dapat ko na bang buksan ulit ang puso ko sa ganito?

Kumpara kay Xanthos, alam kong hindi ako masasaktan kay Archer. Kuya siya ni Abi at alam ko kung gaano siya katino at kabait.

“I’m not pressuring you, Kiara. I just want you to let me prove my sincerity to you. I love you, Kiara… Please let me court you.”

Pinayagan kong manligaw si Archer. Sari sari ang mga reaksyon na natanggap ko kina Denise. Payag na payag si Abi habang sina Denise naman ay todo kontra sa naging desisyon ko.

“Kiara, sana pag-isipan mo munang maigi. Baka naman nabibigla ka lang o ano,” sabi ni Denise at hinawakan ang kamay ko.

I smiled and looked at her. “I want to give him a chance, Denise. Tinanong ko na rin ang opinyon ng kambal tungkol do’n, they don’t seem to be against it too. Besides, Archer is a good man.”

Wala na rin siyang nagawa sa naging desisyon ko. Walang imik sina Cadence pero nararamdaman ko ang hindi n’ya pagsang-ayon sa panliligaw ni Archer sa akin. Alam kong katulad ni Denise, isa siya sa mga umaasa na may pag-asa sa pagitan namin ni Xanthos.

Pero alam din nila na imposible ng mangyari ’yon.

DALAWANG BUWAN ding nanligaw sa ’kin si Archer. Habang nililigawan n’ya ako, tila nililigawan n’ya rin ang mga anak ko. Habang tumatagal, natatagpuan ko na lang din ang sarili kong nahuhulog ang loob sa kanya.

Siguro mahal ko na rin siya.

“Kiara, what should we buy for Xiana and Xevan this time?” Archer asked and smiled at me.

Napangiti na lang din ako. Pakiramdam ko may kung ano sa ngiti n’ya at napapangiti na rin ako.

“You’re spoiling them too much,” I said and chuckled.

Nandito kami sa kotse n’ya at balak naming pumunta sa mall, balak na naman yata n’yang bilhan ng kung ano-ano ang kambal.

“Of course, because I love them… and I love you too,” he said and caressed my cheek.

I smiled and held his hand. “I love you too, Archer.”

Natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. Natawa ako nang bahagyang napaawang ang labi n’ya habang tila hindi makapaniwalang nakatingin sa ’kin ngayon.

“W-What did you say?” he asked, still stunned.

“I said I love you, my boyfriend.”

Ang pagkagulat n’ya ay napalitan ng malaking ngiti. Nanginginig ang mga kamay na hinila n’ya ako para yakapin ako. Napangiti naman ako at ginantihan ang mahigpit n’yang yakap. Kumalas din naman siya agad at muling napatitig sa ’kin. Marahan n’yang hinaplos ang pisngi ko habang maluha-luhang nakatitig sa mga mata ko.

“Damn, Kiara… I love you more.”

He immediately sealed my lips with a soft kiss. I hugged his nape and instantly responded to his kiss… I guess loving a man like him isn’t so bad after all. I like this feeling, I missed this feeling.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Xanthos Archante

“Xanthos…”

I looked at Kiara. She’s currently caressing Xiana’s hair who’s peacefully sleeping beside Xevan. The three of them together is a sight to behold. I can stare at them forever, I won’t get tired of this wonderful sight in front of me.

“Hmm?” I asked.

“Bubukod na ’ko ulit. Napag-usapan naman natin na titira lang ako rito para sabay nating maalagaan ang kambal habang maliit pa sila, diba? Tatlong taon na sila, pwede na ’kong bumukod. Ituloy natin ang naging usapan natin noon na halinhinan tayong mag-aalaga sa mga bata… Okay lang ba ’yon, Xanthos?”

Usapan namin… hindi ko maalala na pumayag ako sa usapang sinasabi n’ya.

I just stared at her and remained silent for a moment. I stared at her eyes and tried to read what she’s thinking right now. She seems determinated to leave… and even if I say that I don’t want her to go I know she’ll still leave. The look in her eyes is way different from before. She doesn’t want to be here… she doesn’t want to be with me anymore.

I don’t want to force her to be with me. I don’t want to imprison her with someone like me. I didn’t pursue her all these years because I know I’m fatal for her… someone like me is dangerous for her. She’s too good for me. I should even be thankful that someone like her is the mother of my children… wanting to be with her is too much to ask for.

I don’t deserve it and she doesn’t deserve it too. She deserves someone who can give her comfort, someone who won’t hurt her.

“Sure, if that’s what you want,” I just said and avoided her gaze.

I’ve done many wrong things in my life. I know it’s out of character but I want to repent from all of it. I should suffer from all the things I did to Kiara. She seems alright now, I don’t want to stir her feelings again. I want her to be alright without me, I know she already did it anyway… She’s a strong woman.

“What the fuck are you doing, Xanthos?! Putangina, nanggigigil ako sa ’yo, pare. Bakit hindi mo pinigilang umalis si Kiara? At anong meron sa pagsasalit-salitan n’yo sa pag-aalaga sa kambal?! Ano ba ’yan, Xanthos? Akala ko pa naman inaayos mo na ang buhay mo,” naiinis na sabi ni Cadence at napahampas pa sa table ko.

“She looked decided, Cad. She really wanted to leave. Why would I stop her if that’s what she wants?” I just said and continued typing on my laptop.

“Bahala ka na nga! Sana pagsisishan mo ’yan! Tinataga ko sa pinakamatigas na bato sa buong universe na pagsisisihan mo ’yan. Gago ka,” naiinis na sabi pa n’ya.

I looked at him and smiled lightly. “That’s what I want to happen, Cad.”

Natigilan si Cad sa sinabi ko. His expression softened. He sighed and slumped on the swivel chair. He shoved his hair with his fingers and let out a heavy sigh.

“Kailan mo ba titigilan ang pagpapahirap sa sarili mo, Xanthos? Please, stop tormenting yourself. Oo, hindi tayo santo… masasama tayong tao. Pero sa lahat ng masamang tao… ikaw, deserve mong sumaya, pare. Noon ka pa nahihirapan sa lahat, hindi ba pwedeng sumaya ka naman? Si Kiara ang kailangan mo para sumaya, Xanthos. ’Yung trauma, takot, pag-aalinlangan… mawawala lahat ’yon dahil kay Kiara.”

I sighed and removed my eyeglasses. I looked at him and smiled bitterly. “I know, Cad. Kiara can make me happy. She’s like my cure, cure from everything that tormenting me for years. She can heal my trauma, my fear, my doubt… everything. But I don’t want to use her. She’s not obligated to heal me or make me happy… No one is obligated to do that, I should do it myself… Yes, I had a painful and traumatic past but that won’t justify everything that I did to her. I need to suffer like this. Actually, I deserve to suffer more than this.”

Cad sighed and went silent. I just don’t tell this to him but I really appreciate his presence. I do appreciate what he’s trying to do and I know he really wants me to be happy. Being a feroci member for almost twenty years gave me a bunch of idiot friends like Cad, but I know they truly care for me… and I’m very thankful for that even though I don’t deserve it.

For another two years that passed, I rarely see Kiara. Sometimes, I secretly visit her to her workplace and I’m happy to see that she’s doing good… She looks happy and free and that’s what she deserves. She deserves a happy life.

“Papa, I want to have something like this too when I grow up,” Xevan murmured and pointed at my tattoos.

I smiled and carried him. I made him sit on my lap and caressed Xiana’s hair who’s currently busy, she’s playing with her dolls.

“I don’t mind, my boy. But ask your mother first… Maybe she won’t like it,” I said and gently pinched his nose.

Xevan pouted and hugged me. He’s just quiet but he’s actually clingy and loves to hug and nuzzle on me. I don’t dislike it though, I actually love it. It makes my heart leap with joy. I really love my children… more than myself.

I looked at Xiana when she suddenly stopped playing with her dolls. Lumapit siya sa ’kin at umupo rin sa kandungan ko. I just smiled and kissed her forehead.

“Papa, Tito Archer always visits Mama. Always din po siyang nabili ng toys and food for us. Baka po may crush siya kay Mama,” Xiana said and sighed.

I just smiled and caressed her hair. “Is he a good man?” I asked.

Xiana nodded. “Yes, Papa. He’s really kind, as in really kind, but I don’t want you to be replaced by him. You’re always the number one man in our hearts. Right, kuya?”

“Yes, Papa is the best,” Xevan said and hugged my nape tighter.

I never thought before that these kids will be able to make me this happy. Their simple words are giving me so much happiness. I really love them, I can even die for them without hesitation.

“Sir Xanthos naman! Hooh! I know professionalism is important pero wapakels na ’ko ro’n… Gigil mo ’ko, Sir! Bakit hinayaan mo lang na magkaroon ng ibang boyfriend si Kiara? Oo nga, gwapo si Archer, yummy rin, mayaman, matalino, super bait, mga one thousand times na mabait kaysa sa ’yo… pero ikaw ’yung manok ko eh. Paano na kayo? Paano na ang KiaThos love team?!”

I shook my head while listening to Denise. I’ve never seen her outburst like this. She’s always professional and polite in front of me… but maybe just like Cad, she wants Kiara to end up with me.

“Denise… Is Kiara happy?” I asked while looking at her.

Halatang natigilan si Denise sa tanong ko. She was stunned. She avoided my gaze and nodded.

“S-She looks happy, Sir,” she answered.

I smiled at her even though I felt a sudden and unexplainable pain in my chest.

“That’s what I want to hear the most, Denise. If she’s happy, then let her be. She’s still a good mother to our children despite having a boyfriend. She deserves pure happiness and comfort… we both know someone like me won’t be able to do that. My presence alone is a threat to her,” I said and continued reading the files.

Yes, Kiara’s happiness… that’s what important.

“Pareng Xanthos! Dahil hindi ikaw ang naka-schedule sa kambal, tagay na lang tayo, lods.”

Biglang sumulpot sina Cad sa bahay ko. He’s with Zak, Arken, Ashteroh, Eron, Xceron, and Remor. They even brought lots of beer with them. I just shook my head and let them be.

“What’s with Xanthos today? He looks gloomier than usual,” Remor said and threw a pack of cigarette to me.

Remor is one of the best sniper in our organization. He was merciless when it comes to killing before but he drastically changed after getting married.

“Chismis lang sa ’kin ni Cad, may boyfriend na raw si Kiara,” Eron said and opened the canned beer.

“Just kill yourself, man. That feeling will kill you anyway,” Arken said and closed his eyes.

I know he’s talking based on his experience. He loves someone too much too but he had to let her go. He’s foolish too, just like me.

“Tatawagin kitang kuya ngayong araw, kawawa ka naman,” napapailing na sabi ni Xceron. Binatukan naman siya ni Cad.

“Parang timang ’to… Kita mong miserable na nga si pareng Xanthos dahil sa sarili n’yang desisyon at katangahan pati na rin sa hindi n’ya paninindigan sa feelings n’ya kay Kiara edi sana masaya siya… tapos aasarin mo pa siya. Anong klase kang kapatid?” napapailing na sabi ni Cad.

I just chuckled while staring at them. They are so chaotic.

“Are you alright?” Zakarius asked.

Cavalcante always acts cold and reserved but I know he truly cares for each one of us in the organization. He’s not even our leader anymore but he’s still always there for us. He’s a year younger than me but he acts like an older brother to me and I truly appreciate that.

“Of course, I’m alright… Did you forget that I’m feroci’s emotionless killing machine?” I said and chuckled.

I drank the beer that Cad gave me. I just closed my eyes and shook my head. Of course, I’m alright. Seeing Kiara happy is more than enough.

“If I were you, I’ll steal her away and won’t let her get away from me,” Ashteroh said and drank his beer too.

Cad laughed and threw a pillow at him. “Sus, naalala ko nga dati muntik mo ng ipakulong si Nathalie, e. Gano’n ka ba magmahal? Kinukulong mo literal?”

“That was before, asshole!” Ashteroh growled and kicked Cad’s leg.

“Oo naalala ko ’yon. Laptrip amputa. Lakas ng amats mo, Ashteroh Alexeev,” natatawang sabi naman ni Eron.

I just shook my head and watched them fight like kids. I just don’t want to say it but I’m actually thankful that they’re here with me right now… it made my night less cold. It gave a familiar warmth to my heart.

“Xanthos…”

I looked at Xceron. He’s looking at me intently as if he’s trying to read what I have in mind right now.

“Hmm?” I asked and drank my beer.

“Paano kung masaktan ni Archer si Kiara? What will you do?”

Natigilan ako sa biglaang tanong n’ya. I just smiled and drank the remaining beer in the can. After that, I clutched the can with my bare hand.

“If that happens… I will kill him myself, Xceron. And no one, not even Kiara, can stop me,” I said and opened another canned beer.

It’s been six years since the last time I killed someone. I promised to myself that I won’t kill people anymore when Xevan and Xiana was born… but I won’t hesitate to kill again if it’s for Kiara.

“Papa…”

I looked at Xiana. She pouted her cute lips and hugged my nape and buried her face on my neck. Xevan just sat beside me and hugged my waist. I smiled and hugged them back.

“Why does my baby looks sad? May nang-away ba sa ’yo? Isumbong mo kay Papa kung meron,” I murmured softly while caressing her hair.

“I love Mama… but why does she need to have a boyfriend? Sinabi ko na lang po na pumapayag ako sa kanila because I don’t want Mama to be disappointed in me… Doesn’t she love us anymore, Papa?”

I sighed and tapped her back gently.

“Xianariah… Your mother loves the both of you more than anyone. Having a boyfriend doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you anymore. I know how much she loves you, Xiana. Stop thinking something like that about your mother… Your mother deserves to be happy. Of course, both of you are her happiness but if Archer can make her happy too, you should be happy for her, right?” I caressed her hair and kissed her temple.

Xiana hugged me tighter and nodded.

“Papa, why are you so selfless?”

I looked at Xevan when he suddenly asked that. He’s staring at my eyes as if he’s telling me a thousand words that his lips can’t say… Is he really… five years old?

“We want Mama to be happy… but we want you to be happy too,” he added and hugged me tighter.

I smiled and caressed his hair. “What are you saying? I’m happy, Xevan. Both of you are enough to make me happy.”

Being this happy with the twin is more than what I deserve. I should already be thankful for this. I shouldn’t be selfish and shouldn’t ask for more.

When the twin are finally asleep. I went outside to buy some ingredients for their breakfast and lunch tomorrow. I don’t know how to cook before but I attended cooking class five years ago for my kids.

I was taken aback when I saw Kiara and her boyfriend having a dinner at a well-known restaurant. I stopped my car and stared at them.

I smiled bitterly when I saw her smiling and laughing with Archer. Denise is right… Kiara looks happy indeed.

I can’t take my eyes off her, I don’t even know how long I’ve been staring at her like this through the restaurant’s glass wall. She seems so happy that she doesn’t care about her surroundings anymore… I stared at her smiling face for a while. I can’t take my eyes of her smile, her laugh, the look in her eyes, and the every movement she makes.

“What a beautiful sight,” I muttered.

This is for the better. Everything is in their respective places… She deserves to be in a warm ray of sunshine and I should remain in the dark. That’s how it should be.

“Papa… Susundin ko po ang sinabi n’yo at magiging happy po ako for Mama,” sabi ni Xiana habang nakayakap sa ’kin.

I smiled at her. “That’s my girl.”

I looked at Xevan. He didn’t say anything but he just hugged me and nuzzle his face on my neck.

Denise will be here tonight to get them. It will be Kiara’s turn to take care of our kids.

“Papa, mami-miss po kita for one week,” Xiana said and pouted.

I just chuckled and pinched her chubby cheeks. “My girl is so sweet. Do I even deserve to have a perfect daughter like you?”

Xianariah giggled and kissed my cheek. “Of course, Papa. You’re the best father in the world!”

I smiled when I felt something in my heart. Her words is enough to make me feel like I’m really the best father even though I know I’m not.

“Hello, kids! It’s time!”

Natigilan kami nang dumating na si Denise. Xiana and Xevan ran to her direction and hugged her. I just smiled and stood up.

“Bye, my angels. Give me a kiss before you leave,” I said and squatted. I pointed my cheeks.

Xiana and Xevan kissed both of my cheeks and hugged me. I rumpled their hair gently and kissed their forehead.

“Please be good to your mother. Okay? I love you both, Papa will miss you,” I said and smiled at them.

I just watched them as they walk away from my house. I sighed and sat on the beach chair near the pool when they finally left.

I sighed and looked at the night sky. I smiled bitterly and closed my eyes as I let myself indulge the emptiness I felt.

I guess my nights will be cold again.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

“Tama na ang pagiging bitter mo, Denise. Tanggapin mo na lang na si kuya ang pinili ni Kiara,” nakangising sabi ni Abi na tila inaasar si Denise.

“Leche! Manahimik ka, please. Never kong matatanggap kahit maging puti pa ang uwak at lahat ng hayop sa mundo. Team Xanthos lang ako forever,” sabi ni Denise at napaismid.

I just shook my head while preparing breakfast for my kids who are busy playing with their toys.

“Xiana, Xevan… dito muna kayo mga anak. Kakain na kayo,” sabi ko nang matapos silang ipagluto ng pancake.

My kids immediately ran to me and hugged my waist. I smiled and squatted to give them both lots of kisses.

“Mama, next time I want carbonara just like Papa’s recipe. Pleaseee,” Xiana pleaded and hugged me tighter.

“Carbonara? Your father can cook that?” I asked, stunned.

“Of course, Mama. Papa is the best cook!” Xiana proudly said.

“Really? That’s surprising,” I mumbled.

He can only cook menudo before. Hindi ko alam na marunong na siyang magluto ngayon.

“Oo naman, mareng Kiara. Um-attend pa ng cooking class si Sir Xanthos noon pa. Nu’ng unang beses n’yang sinubukang magluto, muntik pang nasunog ’yung pad n’ya. Pero ngayon, kung titikman mo ang mga luto ni Sir, baka ma-fall ka ulit sa kanya,” sabi naman ni Denise at nagtaas-baba pa ng kilay.

I just laughed and shook my head. That was really surprising. I never thought that Xanthos will go that far for our kids… but well, seeing how much Xevan and Xiana love him, I guess he must be a good father to them. They even call him the best father in the world.

“Sorry ka na lang, Denise. Magaling din magluto si Kuya Archer. Malamang nga natikman na ni Kiara ang mga luto n’ya. Right, my dear friend?” tanong ni Abi, tila ayaw ipatalo ang manok n’ya na si Archer.

I smiled and nodded. “Hmm, magaling magluto si Archer.”

Ipinaghain ko na sina Xiana at Xevan habang sina Denise at Abi ay patuloy pa rin sa pag-aaway. Kulang na lang yata ay magsabunutan silang dalawa. Hindi na lang ako umaawat dahil lagi naman silang ganyan simula nang maging boyfriend ko si Archer.

Natigilan lang kami nang makarinig ng katok. Agad akong napangiti, malamang si Archer na ’yon.

“H’wag n’yong pagbuksan, unit ko ’to kaya ako ang masusunod,” nakapamaywang na sabi ni Denise.

“Tanggapin mo na lang kasi, Denise girl. Nasa akin ang huling halakhak, ako ang magiging sister-in-law ni Kiara,” nakataas-kilay na sabi ni Abi.

“Gusto mong tadyakan kita palabas ng unit ko? Ako ang mananalo, ako ang magiging secretary-in-law ni mareng Kiara!” sabi naman ni Denise.

Napailing na lang ako at pinagbuksan ng pinto si Archer. Agad siyang napangiti nang makita ako. Sinalubong ko naman siya ng yakap at dinampian siya ng halik sa pisngi.

“It’s not good to be that beautiful first thing in the morning, Kiara,” he muttered and hugged my waist.

“Bolero,” sabi ko na lang at hinampas ang dibdib n’ya.

“Hoy malalandi, kung maglalandian lang kayo diyan sa pinto forever please magsilayas na lang kayo sa pamamahay ko, ASAP!” sigaw ni Denise.

Natatawang napailing na lang ako at pinapasok si Archer sa loob. Agad naman siyang lumapit kina Xiana at Xevan at binigyan ang kambal ng halik sa noo.

“How are you, kids?” Archer asked.

“Hindi sila okay kasi nandito ka na raw,” bulong ni Denise habang napapaismid.

“Ang sungit mo pa rin sa ’kin hanggang ngayon,” natatawang sabi ni Archer kay Denise.

Napaismid na lang si Denise at inirapan siya. Masyado n’yang pinanghahawakan si Xanthos. Maayos naman kami ni Xanthos ngayon, wala namang sama ng loob sa pagitan naming dalawa.

Pagkatapos kumain, agad na rin kaming umalis. Ihahatid muna namin ni Archer ang kambal sa school bago kami papasok sa trabaho.

“Tito Archer, papakasalan mo po ba si Mama?” tanong ni Xiana mula sa backseat.

“Xiana, why are you suddenly asking that?” I asked and looked at her.

Xiana just pouted and curled her already curly hair with her finger. Xevan remained quiet while looking outside.

“Of course, Xiana, we’ll get married eventually. But we have to wait first until you mother’s ready,” Archer said and held my hand.

I don’t have plans with marriage yet. But Archer is right, we’ll get married eventually.

“Magpakabait kayo ha, h’wag kayong mang-aaway ng classmate. Always be good to your teacher. I love you, my babies. Give me a kiss,” sabi ko saka yumuko.

Yumakap naman sa ’kin ang kambal at pinupog ng halik ang mukha ko. Napangiti na lang ako at niyakap din sila.

“I love you too, Mama! I’ll be a good girl po,” Xiana said and kissed me on my cheek again.

“I love you so much, Mama,” sabi naman ni Xevan na nagpangiti sa akin.

Nang nakapagpaalam na sila, pinanood ko na lang sila hanggang makapasok sila sa school. Naramdaman kong umakbay sa ’kin si Archer.

“Ako, walang kiss?” bulong n’ya.

Pabirong siniko ko ang tagiliran n’ya. “Puro ka kalokohan, halika na sa kotse. Male-late na tayo sa trabaho,” natatawang sabi ko na lang.

My three months relationship with Archer were pure bliss. I can’t say that he’s a perfect boyfriend, but he’s doing his best to be like one. He has his ways on making me happy and comfortable with him. He’s not just a boyfriend to me, he’s also a friend that I can share my feelings and burdens with. Archer is a perfect boyfriend for me… he’s more than what I deserve.

“I have to get off now, Archer. Alam mo namang hindi tayo pwedeng makita ng employees mo,” sabi ko na lang nang pigilan n’ya ’kong bumaba ng kotse n’ya.

Archer sighed and just pulled me into a tight hug. I smiled and hugged him back.

“I’m proud that you’re my girlfriend… why do we have to hide our relationship to them?” tila nagmamaktol na tanong n’ya.

Kumalas ako sa pagkakayakap sa kanya at hinarap siya. Hinawakan ko ang magkabilang pisngi n’ya at marahang pinisil ’yon.

“Ayaw ko lang na magkaroon ng kaaway sa kompanya. Alam mo naman ang magiging tingin nila sa ’kin kapag nalaman nila na boyfriend kita, diba? Iisipin nila na inakit kita or what dahil ikaw ang boss.”

Napabuntonghininga si Archer sa sinabi ko. He just kissed my forehead and nodded. I smiled and kissed his lips. He instantly responded to my kiss and hugged my waist. Good thing his car is heavy tinted.

“H’wag na lang kaya tayong pumasok ngayon,” sabi ni Archer sa pagitan ng halik n’ya.

Hinampas ko ang dibdib n’ya. “I’ll kick your ass.”

He just chuckled and hugged me tighter as if he doesn’t want to let me go.

“Kiara, gusto na talaga kitang ipakilala sa parents ko,” bulong n’ya saka isinubsob ang mukha sa leeg ko.

“Kilala na naman nila ako, e,” natatawang sabi ko na lang.

“I mean, gusto kong makilala ka na nila bilang girlfriend ko,” tila naghihimutok na sabi n’ya.

Napangiti na lang ako at tumango. “Fine, let’s do that.”

Napangiti rin naman siya at muli akong siniil ng halik sa labi.

Matagal din kaming naglandian sa kotse na halos muntik na naming malimutan ang oras. Dali dali na ’kong bumaba ng kotse n’ya. Sa likod ng building n’ya ako dinala dahil may daan do’n papasok ng kompanya na walang masyadong nadaan. Alam naman ng guard do’n ang relasyon namin ni Archer at mapagkakatiwalaan daw ito sabi n’ya.

“Kiara… totoo bang may relasyon kayo ni Sir Archer?”

Natigilan ako sa agad na tanong nila sa ’kin pagpasok ko sa kompanya. Agad na nanlamig ang mga kamay ko dahil sa kaba. Paano nila nalaman ’yon?

“H-Ha?” tanong ko na lang dahil hindi ko alam ang sasabihin.

“May nakakita sa inyo ni Sir na nakain sa isang restaurant. May nagsabi rin na nakita nila si Sir Archer na kasama kang ihatid ang mga anak mo sa school. So… ibig sabihin no’n may relasyon kayo diba?” tanong pa ng isang empleyado.

Huminga ako nang malalim at pilit na pinakalma ang sarili ko kahit pinagpapawisan na ako nang malamig ngayon.

“I-It’s not like that…” I mumbled and forced a smile.

“What do you mean ‘it’s not like that’? Bakit dine-deny mo pa? Kaya naman pala na-promote ka, ang lakas mo kay Sir,” tila nanunuyang sabi naman ng isa.

I bit my lower lip and tried to calm myself. I want to be professional and reserved as much as possible. I shouldn’t let this took over my emotion. I’m like a tamed cat here but they don’t know how can I be when I’m angry… I want to have a good image here. Ayokong ma-turn off sa akin ang mga magulang ni Archer kapag pinakilala n’ya na ako sa kanila bilang girlfriend n’ya… pero sinasagad ng mga ’to ang pasensya ko.

“Why are you all so insecure? Why? Can’t accept the fact that I can have a boyfriend as perfect as him while you can’t?” I asked and raised an eyebrow.

Tila namula sa galit ang mga mukha nila. Agad na nag-angat ng kamay ang isang empleyado at akmang sasampalin ako nang may agad na humawak sa balikat n’ya.

“Hey, woman… what do you think you’re doing?”

Natigilan ako nang makita si Xanthos na malamig na nakatingin sa babae. Bahagyang napaatras sa akin ang empleyado nang bigyan siya nang nakakatakot na tingin ni Xanthos.

“I’m asking you…” Xanthos added in a cold tone while staring at the woman.

What is he doing here?

Natahimik naman ang lahat at tila natakot sa presensya ni Xanthos. Maski ako kung hindi ko siya kilala, matatakot din ako sa presensya n’ya. Di hamak na mas malaki siya kaysa sa mga tao rito. Idagdag pa na kita ang tattoo n’ya sa kamay na dumagdag sa kakaibang aura n’ya.

Xanthos looked at me, his expression softened. “Are you alright?”

I smiled and nodded. “I’m fine, you don’t have to do that.”

Hindi ko na maalala ang huling beses na nakita ko si Xanthos. Pakiramdam ko isang taon na yata ang nakakalipas nang huli kaming nagkita.

Xanthos finally let go of the employee’s shoulder. Dali dali namang nagsi-alisan ang mga empleyado at iniwan kami dahil na rin siguro sa takot kay Xanthos.

There’s nothing to fear about him if we will talk about how he is now. I know that he became a good man for our children. I’m actually proud that he’s their father.

“Thank you, Xanthos,” I said and smiled shyly. It’s kinda embarrassing that he has to see me in that situation.

“Where’s your boyfriend? Why isn’t he with you right now?” he asked, his forehead creased again.

“We don’t need to be always together. It’s just a shame that the employees discovered about our relationship,” I said and held my arm. “Ahm, by the way, what are you doing here?”

“I’m here for work related matters… I’ll go ahead, take care of yourself,” he said and gently tapped my head before going inside the elevator. I just smiled as I watch him leave.

Our kids are right… Xanthos became a better man indeed. I’m happy for him.

I just sighed and let out a deep breath. It seems like I have to resign and look for another company now.

“I’m nervous, Archer… Ngayon na ba talaga?” kinakabahang tanong ko.

Archer laughed and held my hand and intertwined our fingers. “Don’t be nervous. Alam mo namang mabait ang parents ko, diba?”

I know that. Ilang taon ko ng kaibigan si Abi at madalas akong napunta sa kanila noon. Mabait nga talaga ang mga magulang nila at hindi matapobre kahit pa mayaman sila. Pero kinakabahan pa rin ako. Ibang sitwasyon na kasi ito.

Kinakabahan pa rin ako hanggang sa makarating kami sa mansyon nina Archer. Ang tagal na noong huling beses akong nagpunta rito. College pa yata ako no’n.

“Manang, where’s Mom and Dad?” Archer asked one of the maids.

“Nasa dining area na po sila, Sir. Kanina pa po sila naghihintay.”

Mas lalong umakyat ang kaba ko habang naglalakad na kami papuntang dining area. Halatang nararamdaman ni Archer ang kaba ko kaya marahan n’yang pinipisil ang kamay ko.

“H’wag kang kabahan, nandito lang ako lagi sa tabi mo,” sabi ni Archer saka dinampian ng halik ang likod ng palad ko. Napangiti na lang ako kahit nangunguna ang kaba sa puso ko.

Naghihintay nga ang mga magulang n’ya sa dining area pagdating namin. Agad kaming pinaupo ng mga ’to habang pinaghahain kami ng mga katulong. Halos hindi ko na marinig ang paligid sa sobrang kaba.

“I didn’t imagine that you’ll end up with one of Abi’s friends, Archer. I’m happy, Kiara is a good woman,” Tita Celina, Archer’s mom said.

I just felt a little better as time passes by. They’re still kind as ever. Archer’s Dad is not talking that much but he’s always like that even before. He rarely talks and kinda looks scary and intimidating but Abi said that her father is actually kind as you get to know him.

“May balak na ba kayong magpakasal?” tanong pa ni Tita Celina.

“We’re not going there yet… but we’ll eventually get married. I’m hoping to get your blessing on that moment, Mom.” Archer held my hand under the table.

“Of course, I don’t mind,” Tita Celina said and smiled at me.

Nang matapos na kaming kumain. Nag-request si Tita Celina na kausapin ako nang mag-isa sa living room. Iniwan naman kami ni Archer at ng Dad nito para makapag-usap.

“I’ll be honest, Kiara. I heard what happened to NTC and your father,” Tita Celina said. Her voice became serious and the smile on her face vanished.

My hands trembled as well as my knees. I don’t like where this conversation is leading. I have a bad feeling about this.

“I know NTC has a new owner now and your father is currently in prison because of rape and murder case. Alam ko rin na may dalawa ka ng anak,” seryosong sabi nito habang nakatitig sa ’kin.

Alanganing napangiti na lang ako. “O-Opo, tama po ang lahat ng sinabi n’yo,” mahinang sambit ko na lang.

“Don’t get me wrong, Kiara. I liked you before. You’re smart, classy, a business tycoon’s heiress, you were almost perfect before… But things are different now. You know what I mean, right?”

I bit my lower lip and avoided her gaze. Of course, I know it… I know what she’s trying to say.

“Kung ikaw ang nasa posisyon ko, papayag ka bang babaeng may mga anak na at anak pa ng kriminal ang makatuluyan ng anak mo?” deretsahang tanong ni Tita Celina.

Hindi ako nakasagot. Pakiramdam ko wala akong kalaban laban sa kanya sa mga oras na ’to.

“I’ll go straight to the point, Ms. North… I don’t like you for my son. My son deserves a better woman. I’m planning to marry him off with my friend’s daughter. Please, get what I’m trying to say. I don’t have grudge against you or something. I just want my son to end up with an ideal woman… and you’re not that kind of woman.”

Tita Celina’s words left me speechless that I didn’t even get to say a word. I don’t know why I didn’t defend myself. Maybe it’s because I know she’s right. I’m not the kind of woman that Archer deserves. I’m helpless against the woman that his mother wants him to end up with.

“Kiara, bakit kanina ka pa tahimik? Okay ka lang ba?” tanong ni Archer at hinawakan ang kamay ko.

I just smiled at him and nodded. “I’m fine.”

Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at tumingin sa bintana… Siguro nga ay hindi gano’ng kadali ang gustuhing sumaya sa lalaking mahal mo lalo na kung masyadong mataas para sa ’yo.

Chapter Thirty

Hindi ko matukoy kung ano’ng problema ko. I just found myself distancing myself from Archer without giving him a proper explanation of my behavior. I was affected by his mother’s words, I was so affected that it made me question my worth as a woman.

“Kiara, may problema raw ba kayo ni Kuya Archer? Ayaw ka lang n’ya tanungin directly pero alam kong gusto n’yang malaman kung bakit distant ka sa kanya these past few days,” sabi ni Abi habang nainom ng beer.

Na kay Xanthos ang kambal ngayon kaya ayos lang na mag-inom sila. Ako naman hindi na masyadong mahilig uminom. Naalis ko na sa sarili ko ’yon simula nang nanganak ako.

Napapalakpak si Denise. “Nako, mareng Abi. Sign na ’yan.”

Abi’s forehead furrowed. “What do you mean?”

“Sign na ’yan na ang ship ko ang lalayag at sa ’yo naman ’yung lulubog. Sorry mare pero may butas na ang bangka mo, lulubog na ’yan.” Napahagalpak ng tawa si Denise.

Napailing na lang ako at kinuha ang inabot na canned beer ni Denise. Wala akong balak uminom ngayon pero mukhang mapipilitan ako. Ilang araw na ang nakakalipas noong nagpunta kami sa mansyon nina Archer pero hanggang ngayon dinadamdam ko pa rin ang mga sinabi ni Tita Celina.

“Ano ba’ng problema n’yo ni kuya? Sabihin mo sa ’kin, hindi ko sasabihin sa kanya, promise,” sabi ni Abi at tinaas pa ang kanang kamay n’ya.

Mapait na napangiti na lang ako at napailing. Ayokong sabihin sa kanya ang tungkol do’n lalo pa’t magulang n’ya ang mga ’yon.

“Palagi lang talaga akong pagod kaya wala na ’kong masyadong time. Wala naman akong problema kay Archer,” sabi ko na lang.

I don’t want to avoid him but I can’t help it because I’m still contemplating. I have to think everything through especially our relationship. Pakiramdam ko pa naman ay kahit na ano pang gawin ko, hindi ako matatanggap ni Tita Celina. She has someone better for Archer… What if…

I sighed and shook my head. Negativity and insecurity are poisoning my mind.

“Kiara, nay problema ba tayo?”

Natigilan ako nang marahang pinisil ni Archer ang kamay ko. Hindi ko na napansin na nakatulala na lang pala ako sa pagkain. Napatikhim na lang ako at tipid na ngumiti sa kanya.

“Bakit naman tayo magkakaproblema?” ganting tanong ko at muling tumuloy sa pagkain.

“You’re not being yourself for the past few days. I’m worried, Kiara. Please tell me if we have a problem and don’t try to hide it from me. Please…”

Archer’s words left me speechless. I realized that I’m being unfair to him. He’s doing his best to make me feel better but here I am, making myself distant and trying to conceal the real problem. I feel pathetic.

“Archer…” I murmured.

Archer stopped walking and looked at me. He intertwined our fingers and gently caressed my hand with his thumb. We just finished eating and we’re on our way to his car.

“Why? Is there a problem?” he asked.

I bit my lower lip and looked at him. “Tita Celina doesn’t want me for you.”

Archer froze with what I said. I know this will be his reaction but I still chose to tell it to him. I don’t want to be unfair to him anymore.

“Is that so? That’s the reason why you’re suddenly distant to me?” he asked and held my shoulder.

I sighed and nodded.

Archer sighed and held both of my cheeks. “Now I know why Mom keeps on pairing me up with some woman. I don’t know that she did say something to you… I’m sorry for being oblivious. I should have known,” he said while caressing my cheek.

I smiled and shook my head. “There’s nothing to be sorry about. I chose to hide it from you… and besides, I can’t blame Tita Celina for choosing a woman that you deserve better. I have children, our company is not ours anymore, and my Dad is in prison right now. She’s just doing her role as your Mom,” I muttered and avoided his gaze.

“I told you before that I don’t care about those, Kiara. So what if you already have children? They’re wonderful kids. So what if you’re not a company heiress anymore? So what if you’re Dad is in prison? His crime is not yours too… You’re a wonderful woman, you’re the best girlfriend for me. You’re the only one who can make me this happy and you are the one I love.”

Napangiti ako sa mga sinabi n’ya. Hinawakan ko ang kamay n’yang nakahawak sa pisngi ko. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang sinseridad n’ya sa bawat salitang binibitiwan n’ya.

Pero tama bang ipaglaban pa namin ’to?

Archer and I came back to normal after that conversation. We decided to face and solve problems together for that’s what we should be doing. We didn’t talk about his parents again but he told me that he will make sure that his parents will like me. I actually doubted his words… Tita Celina will never like me for him.

Mabilis ding natapos ang masasayang araw namin ni Archer dahil sinadya akong bisitahin ni Tita Celina sa unit ni Denise at saktong nandoon din ang kambal. Buti na lang at wala si Denise sa unit dahil kung nandito siya, bala mapikon lang siya sa mga sasabihin ni Tita Celina.

May kasama siyang babae na hindi ko kilala o pamilyar sa akin… pero maganda ito at mukhang nanggaling sa mayamang pamilya.

“Sila ba ang mga anak mo?” tanong ni Tita Celina habang nakatingin sa kambal na abala sa paglalaro.

Pakiramdam ko may kung ano akong naramdaman sa puso ko sa paraan ng pagtingin n’ya sa kambal… Hindi ko ’yon gusto. Wala akong pakialam kahit ano pang tingin ang ibigay n’ya sa ’kin, pero ayaw kong tingnan n’ya ang mga anak ko na para bang nakakadiri sila.

“Opo, sila ang anak ko,” sagot ko na lang. Pilit kong pinakakalma ang sarili ko.

“Who’s their father?” Tita Celina asked.

“Xanthos Archante,” I answered. I bet she knows Xanthos. Xanthos is well-known in business industry.

Halatang natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. Hindi n’ya naitago ang pagkagulat sa mukha n’ya.

“Xanthos Archante? The powerful business tycoon, Xanthos Archante?” she asked to make sure.

I bit my lower lip and nodded. I don’t know why I felt a little proud about it. Xanthos is not just a wise businessman, he’s also a good man and a good father to our children.

“Kung katulad n’ya naman pala ang tatay ng mga anak mo, bakit hindi ka na lang makipagbalikan sa kanya?” tanong ni Tita Celina nang mahimasmasan na ito sa pagkagulat nito kanina.

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. “Hindi na po namin mahal ang isa’t isa,” nasabi ko na lang.

Tita Celina’s eyebrow shot up. “Is that important? I married Archer’s Dad without any feelings for him but I eventually fell in love with him. And nowadays, love is not important, Kiara… Being practical is more important.” She crossed her arms. “Xanthos Archante is on another level. He’s above us, he’s more powerful. I’m Archer’s Mom but if I were you, I will stick with Mr. Archante. You’re not being practical enough, hija. Someone like you won’t survive this harsh world.”

Hindi ako nakapagsalita sa sinabi n’ya. Gano’n n’ya bang ka-ayaw sa akin at pinagpipilitan n’ya ako kay Xanthos? Alam kong nanay siya ni Archer pero buhay ko ’to, ako ang masusunod kung sino ang gusto kong mahalin.

“By the way, I want you to meet the woman who’s way better for my son. She’s Yvette De Gracia, she will be my son’s fiancée. She’s the perfect choice for Archer,” Tita Celina said.

“Tita, don’t be like that po. Nakakahiya sa girlfriend ni Archer,” tila nahihiyang sabi ng babaeng nagngangalang Yvette.

“Why? I’m just telling the truth. Magpapakasal din naman kayo ni Archer sooner or later.”

Napatingin ako kay Yvette na napapatungo. I’m not getting any bitch vibes from her. Mukha talaga siyang mabait at tila nahihiya talaga siya sa mga sinasabi ni Tita Celina. Napatingin siya sa ’kin at tila nahingi ng paumanhin ang mga mata n’ya.

Napatingin si Tita Celina sa kambal. I felt another pang in my chest the way she looks at my innocent children. My jaw clenched… I hate it.

“Kahit na ipagpilitan mo pa ang sarili mo kay Archer, sa tingin mo ba magiging madali ang lahat para sa mga anak mo? They will be mistreated, Kiara. Ituturing sila na sampid at basura, gusto mo ba ’yon? Ina ka rin at alam kong ayaw mo ’yon. Anak sa labas ang magiging lagay nila at ikaw nga hindi ko matanggap, sila pa kaya? Ayoko ng mga sampid at pakalat-kalat sa pamilya ko, Kiara.”

Napakuyom ang kamao ko. Bumigat ang paghinga ko at napatingin sa kambal. Nakatingin sila sa ’min at tila ba narinig nila ang sinabi ni Tita Celina. Tila may kumirot sa puso ko nang makita ang malungkot nilang mukha.

“Saglit lang po.” Tumayo ako at nagtungo sa kitchen counter.

Dumakot ako ng asin at walang habas na inihagis ’yon kay Tita Celina. Napahiyaw naman siya at dali daling tumayo upang pagpagin ang sarili.

“Wala akong pakialam sa sasabihin mo sa ’kin pero wala kang karapatang pagsalitaan nang gano’n ang mga anak ko! Wala akong pakialam kahit nanay ka pa ni Archer! Kaya umalis ka na bago ko maisipang kumukulong tubig naman ang ihagis sa pagmumukha mo!”

Tuluyan nang naputol ang pagtitimpi ko. Wala siyang karapatan na tawaging sampid ang mga anak ko at sa harap pa nila mismo. Pakiramdam ko nawala na ang kakarampot na paggalang na nararamdaman ko sa kanya nang oras na nakita kong nasaktan ang mga anak ko sa sinabi n’ya.

“Gaya nga ng sabi mo, ina tayong pareho… Kaya alam kong alam mo ang pinakaayaw ng mga inang katulad natin! Ayaw na ayaw kong nasasaktan ang mga anak ko, kaya umalis ka! H’wag kang magpapakita sa akin ulit!” sigaw ko pa at muli siyang sinabuyan ng asin.

Hindi nakapagsalita si Tita Celina pero masama ang tingin nito sa ’kin. Dali dali na lang siyang umalis kasama si Yvette at iniwan kami.

Nanghihinang napakapit ako sa mesa saka napapikit nang mariin. Sinanay ko na ang sarili kong magtimpi sa mga bagay bagay pero nawawala ang lahat ng ’yon kapag mga anak ko na ang napag-uusapan.

“Mama…”

Napatingin ako sa kambal na tila nag-aalangang lumapit sa akin. Napabuntonghininga ako at ako na mismo ang lumapit sa kanila. Hinaplos ko ang buhok nila at niyakap sila nang mahigpit.

“Sorry mga baby ko. Hindi totoo ang sinabi n’ya, hindi kayo sampid o basura. Sorry kung kailangan n’yo pang marinig ’yon… H’wag n’yo ng isipin ’yon ha? Hindi totoo ’yon. Mahal na mahal kayo ni Mama,” sabi ko habang hinahaplos ang buhok nila.

Yumakap naman sa ’kin ang kambal. Pakiramdam ko kahit papa’no ay kumalma ang puso ko dahil sa simpleng yakap mula sa kanila.

“Love ka rin po namin, Mama… Hindi na po namin ’yon iisipin dahil sabi po ni Papa, treasure daw po kami ni Xevan sa buhay n’yong dalawa,” sabi ni Xiana saka kumalas sa pagkakayakap sa ’kin at binigyan ako nang matamis na ngiti.

Pakiramdam ko nahawa ako sa magandang ngiti na ’yon at napangiti na lang din ako.

“Tama ang Papa n’yo… Kayo ang pinaka-importanteng treasure sa buhay naming dalawa.” Muli ko silang niyakap at pinupog ng halik ang mukha nila. Pakiramdam ko gumaan lalo ang pakiramdam ko nang marinig ko ang matunog na tawa nila.

Tuluyan na akong umiwas kay Archer pagkatapos ng tagpo namin ng nanay n’ya. Alam kong ramdam n’ya ’yon pero pilit n’yang inaayos ang lahat sa pagitan namin.

“Kiarabog! Tangina ni Archer, nakita ko may kasamang babae. Nagde-date pa sila,” sumbong sa ’kin ni Cadence.

Napabuntonghininga ako. “Hindi n’ya kabit ’yon, Cad. Malamang iyon ’yung babaeng ipinipilit ng nanay n’ya sa kanya. Kung ano-anong iniisip mo kay Archer… H’wag mong sasabihin ’yon kahit kanino, lalo kay Xanthos,” sabi ko na lang saka uminom ng tubig.

Alam kong hindi magagawa ni Archer ang gano’ng bagay.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing pa-sipol sipol si Cad at hindi makatingin nang ayos sa ’kin. “B-Bakit bawal kong sabihin kay Xanthos?”

“Malamang, baka kung ano pa’ng magawa n’ya kay Archer,” sabi ko na lang saka umupo sa upuan na malapit.

Hindi na nakapagsalita si Cad. Napakunot ang noo ko nang mapansing pagalaw-galaw siya.

“Don’t tell me… you already told him that gibberish?” I asked and stood up.

“Actually, mare… kay Xanthos ko unang sinabi. Hehe, h’wag kang mag-alala, hindi naman siya mukhang galit pero may dala siyang baril,” sabi ni Cad at nag-peace sign pa sa akin.

Napapikit ako nang mariin. Gusto kong tadyakan si Cad ngayon pero wala na ’kong oras para do’n.

“N-Nasaan siya ngayon?” tanong ko kay Cad.

“A-Ano… Papunta siya ro’n sa restaurant kung nasaan sina Archer saka ’yung babae n’ya,” sabi ni Cad saka napakamot sa batok n’ya.

Agad na ’kong umalis nang sabihin na ni Cad kung saang restaurant ‘yon. Pinagpapawisan ako nang malamig habang nasa taxi. I know Xanthos’ past. I know that he killed a lot of people. He admitted it to me before.

I know he can kill Archer if he wants to.

Umakyat ang kaba sa dibdib ko nang makitang wala na sina Archer sa restaurant nang magpunta ako ro’n.

“Kiara…”

Natigilan ako nang may babaeng lumapit sa akin. Napakunot ang noo ko habang pilit na inaalala kung sino siya… Yvette?

“H-Hinahanap mo ba si Archer? Nagpunta sila ro’n, kinaladkad siya ni Xanthos Archante papunta ro’n,” sabi n’ya at itinuro ang building na malapit na sa pagkakatanda ko ay abandonado na.

Dali dali akong nagtungo ro’n. Naramdaman kong sumunod sa akin si Yvette pero hinayaan ko na lang siya.

Napasinghap ako nang maabutang sinusuntok ni Xanthos si Archer na walang kalaban-laban. Dali dali akong pumasok upang pigilan siya.

“X-Xanthos! Stop it! Please, stop!”

Natigilan naman siya nang marinig ang boses ko. Napatingin siya sa ’kin at pabalyang binitiwan ang kwelyo ni Archer. Duguan ang kamao n’ya pero mas malala ang kalagayan ni Archer.

Agad akong lumapit kay Archer at inalalayan siyang tumayo.

“M-Mali ka ng iniisip, Xanthos. Archer didn’t cheat on me, he will never do that… Please, believe me, d-don’t hurt him anymore.”

Xanthos just looked at Archer with his emotionless eyes. He sighed and took a handkerchief inside his coat and wiped his hands. Hindi na siya nagsalita at napasandal na lang sa pader.

“K-Kiara… I’ll explain everything. T-There’s nothing going on between Yvette and I. P-Pinagbigyan ko na lang si Mom para hindi na siya–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin ni Archer.

“I know. I know you won’t cheat on me, Archer,” I said and smiled at him.

Archer smiled despite having many wounds. “T-Thank you.”

“B-But, let’s… let’s end this relationship, Archer.”

Halatang natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. Pati si Xanthos na kanina pa tahimik at nakatingin lang sa ’min ay halatang natigilan din.

“W-What do you mean, Kiara? I thought you believe me, w-why are you suddenly breaking up with me?” Archer asked. His voice is shaking.

“I believe in you, Archer… B-But we can’t be together anymore. Your family is against us, they don’t want you to end up with a woman who has children and a criminal’s daughter… I-I understand their concern, Archer. You should too,” I said while trying to stop myself from crying.

“I-I told you before, Kiara. All of it don’t matter as long as I love you. A-Akala ko ba okay na tayo, Kiara? Bakit naman ganito? Y-You know how much I love you… H-Hindi mo na ba ako mahal?”

Tuluyan ng kumawala ang mga luha ko sa sinabi n’ya.

“I love you, Archer. I really do… but I love my children more and I’m choosing them… I don’t want them to be mistreated, Archer. Gusto ko ng tahimik na buhay kasama sila pero kung ipipilit natin ang sa atin, magugulo lang ang buhay ng mga anak ko at ayaw kong mangyari ’yon. S-Sila ang pinakamahalaga para sa ’kin at ayokong tratuhin silang sampid. Ayoko ng kailangan pa nilang ipagsiksikan ang sarili nila. K-Kung ako lang din ang tatratuhing masama ng nanay mo, wala akong pakialam. Pero ibang usapan na kapag mga anak ko, Archer. M-Mahal kita pero sana maintindihan mo kung bakit kailangan kong gawin ’to.”

Hindi nakapagsalita si Archer pero kitang kita ko ang mga luhang dumadaloy sa pisngi n’ya. Nasasaktan ako habang nakatitig sa naluha n’yang mukha pero wala akong magagawa… Mga anak ko ang palagi kong uunahin.

“Yvette… P-Please pakidala sa ospital si Archer,” sabi ko kay Yvette na nakatayo mula sa di kalayuan habang nakatingin sa ’min.

Kahit nag-aalangan, lumapit si Yvette at sinubukang alalayan si Archer. Mukhang nanghihina na rin si Archer dahil sa mga natamo n’ya kaya wala siyang nagawa kundi ang sumama kay Yvette.

“M-Mag-uusap pa tayo, Kiara… H-Hindi pa tapos ang pag-uusap natin,” sabi ni Archer bago sila tuluyang umalis ni Yvette.

Umalis na rin kami ng building na ’yon ni Xanthos at naglakad lakad. Nakasunod lang siya sa ’kin hanggang sa makarating kami sa malapit na pasyalan. Umupo ako sa bench, naramdaman kong umupo rin si Xanthos sa tabi ko pero medyo malayo-layo ang pwesto n’ya sa akin.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko nang tuluyan na akong napatakip sa mukha ko kasabay ng paghagulgol ng iyak. Hindi ko alam kung gaano ako katagal umiyak. Hindi naman nagsasalita si Xanthos sa tabi ko at hinayaan lang akong umiyak.

“A-Ang sakit sakit Xanthos… H-Hindi talaga kami pwede pero mahal ko siya. Mahal ko talaga si Archer…” naluluhang sabi ko habang patuloy na pinapahid ang mga luhang kumakawala mula sa mga mata ko.

Hindi agad nakapagsalita si Xanthos. Kahit papa’no nagpapasalamat ako na nandito siya sa tabi ko at nakikinig sa akin.

“I know, Kiara… Just cry and let it all out. I won’t leave you here.”

Chapter Thirty-One

“If you love him, why did you break up with him?” Xanthos asked.

“Narinig mo naman, ’di ba? Ayaw sa ’kin ng parents ni Archer lalo ng nanay n’ya… Pinagsalitaan din ng nanay n’ya ng masasakit ang kambal. Nandoon ang kambal ng mga oras na ’yon at naiinis pa rin ako kapag naaalala ko,” sabi ko na lang at napatingin sa dumidilim na langit.

Hindi nga talaga ako iniwan dito ni Xanthos hanggang sa tumigil na ako sa pag-iyak. Hindi siya nagsalita habang naiyak ako at nasa tabi ko lang. Marahil hindi n’ya alam ang sasabihin pero malaking bagay na ang pananatili n’ya sa tabi ko.

“Ano’ng sinabi n’ya sa mga anak ko?” nakakunot noong tanong ni Xanthos.

Agad na umakyat ang kaba sa dibdib ko nang sumama ang tingin n’ya.

“Ahm, d-don’t worry… Tinapunan ko naman siya ng asin pagkatapos no’n at ipinaliwanag ko sa mga bata na hindi totoo ang sinabi n’ya,” sabi ko na lang.

“Do you want me to ruin her life?” nakakunot-noong tanong ni Xanthos.

Agad akong napasinghap at umiling. “No! Y-You don’t have to. I mean, I already gave her a lesson. You don’t have to do anything.”

Xanthos chuckled and gently rumpled my hair. Nagtatakang napatingin na lang ako sa kanya.

“Relax, I’m just kidding,” he said and smiled at me.

Tiningnan ko siya nang masama at hinampas ang braso n’ya. “Nasasaktan na nga ako rito, niloloko mo pa ’ko.”

He just laughed and flicked my forehead. I just sighed while listening to his refreshing laugh. Ang tagal na noong huli ko siyang narinig na tumawa nang ganito.

Maya maya pa ay naging seryoso ulit si Xanthos. Bahagya siyang ngumiti saka marahang hinaplos ang buhok ko. Nagtatakang napatingin ako sa kanya ngunit hindi ko siya pinigilan.

“Kiara… Thank you for choosing our children. Thank you for letting him go for their sake,” he said in a soft voice.

I just smiled and avoided his gaze. “You don’t have to thank me for it. Natural lang na piliin ko sila dahil mga anak ko sila. Kahit na mahal ko pa si Archer, hindi ko siya pipiliin kung mga anak ko na ang pag-uusapan dahil mas mahal ko ang mga anak ko. Paulit-ulit ko silang pipiliin…” Napabuntonghininga ako. “…at isa pa, mas maganda na rin na makahanap si Archer ng babaeng mas karapat-dapat sa kanya. He’s actually too good for me, no, he’s the best for me. Someone like him doesn’t deserve a messed up woman like me. H-He deserves a better woman like Yvette. I’m no match for her… She’s the kind of woman that Archer deserves.”

Saglit na hindi nakapagsalita si Xanthos. Napatingin ako sa kanya. Natigilan ako nang mapansing nakatitig siya sa ’kin.

“You’re a perfect woman,” he said while staring at me.

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya at tila hindi agad ’yon nagproseso sa isip ko.

“You’re the best mother, you’re a wonderful, strong, and independent woman… and you’re a perfect lover too. He’s actually lucky to have you as her girlfriend. He will never find someone like you again… you’re one of a kind,” he added. He smiled at me, and his smile alone almost reached my heart.

I unconsciously smiled too with his remark. I never thought that I’ll get to hear something so heartwarming from him. It feels like all of the self-doubt that Archer’s mother caused to me suddenly vanished without a trace. Simple words from his is enough to help me regain my confidence.

“T-Thank you so much, Xanthos.” I smiled at him.

“Do you wanna feel better, Kiara?” he asked and stood up.

“O-Of course, I do,” sabi ko na lang.

Inilahad ni Xanthos ang kamay n’ya. Kahit nag-aalangan, tinanggap ko iyon. Marahan naman akong hinila patayo ni Xanthos.

“Let’s go at my place. Xiana and Xevan are sleeping there. You’ll feel much better once you see them,” he said and smiled.

I wiped my tears and nodded. “Yeah, that’s right. Just seeing them will make me feel better.”

Sumakay na kami sa kotse n’ya. Tahimik na tumingin na lang ako sa mga gusaling nadadaanan namin. Mabigat pa rin sa loob ko ang nangyari. Alam kong hindi ko basta basta makakalimutan si Archer at ang nararamdaman ko para sa kanya… pero iisipin ko na lang na ginawa ko ’yon para sa ikabubuti ng mga anak ko at iyon ang mahalaga… ang mga anak ko ang mahalaga.

Hindi ko na namalayan na nakarating na kami sa pad n’ya. Ang tagal na rin noong huli akong nagpunta rito, pero walang nagbago sa paligid.

Agad akong inihatid ni Xanthos sa silid ng mga bata at naabutan ko silang mahimbing na natutulog. Pakiramdam ko agad na naalis ang bigat sa dibdib ko nang makita sila. Napangiti na lang ako at agad na lumapit at tumabi sa kanila. Buti na lang at malaki ang kama nila.

“You can sleep there beside them… You can also take a shower if you want to, your old clothes are still there,” sabi ni Xanthos sa mahinang boses na tila nag-iingat siya na magising ang mga bata.

Napangiti ako at tumango. “Salamat, Xanthos.”

Tumango na lang siya bago lumabas ng silid.

Sinunod ko ang sinabi n’ya at nag-shower muna at nagpalit ng damit saka muling humiga sa tabi ng kambal. Ipinikit ko ang mga mata ko at hinayaan na lang na hilahin ako ng antok… Pakiramdam ko talagang napagod ako ngayong araw.

NAGISING AKO nang maramdaman kong may tumatalon sa kama. Kinusot ko ang mga mata ko saka unti-unting idinilat ang mga mata ko.

“Yehey! Nandito si Mama, kuya! Meaning to say, we will finally live together as a whole family!” excited na sabi ni Xiana at muling nagtatalon sa kama.

“Yehey!” sabi rin ni Xevan at nakitalon. Hindi ko inaasahan na sasabihin n’ya ’yon.

“Mga anak…”

Napatingin silang dalawa sa ’kin at agad akong sinugod ng yakap. Napangiti na lang ako at niyakap din sila.

“Mama! Dito na po ba tayo ulit titira kay Papa?” excited na tanong ni Xiana.

I sighed and caressed her hair. “No, baby. I’ll just stay here for today. Babalik din ako kay Ninang Denise n’yo mamaya.”

Kitang kita ko ang pagkadismaya sa mukha ni Xiana dahil sa sinabi ko, gano’n din naman si Xevan.

“Mama, isusumbong po kita kay Papa,” paghihimutok ni Xiana at dali daling lumabas ng kwarto. Agad namang sumunod si Xevan sa kanya.

I just shook my head and stood up to take a quick shower before heading out of the room. Umaga na pala. Mukhang tuloy-tuloy ang naging tulog ko rito kagabi.

Dumiretso ako sa kusina nang makaamoy ako ng mabangong niluluto. Naabutan ko si Xanthos na nagluluto habang ang kambal naman nakayakap sa baywang n’ya at ginugulo siya.

Napatitig ako sa kanila. Napapatawa na lang si Xanthos at tila hindi ito naiirita sa pangungulit na ginagawa ng kambal. Hindi ko namalayang napangiti ako habang pinagmamasdan sila.

“Sabi po ni Mama aalis din siya. H’wag ka pong pumayag, Papa! We should live together again, forever and ever! Iyon po ang gusto namin ni Kuya Xevan… Diba?” tanong ni Xiana sa kakambal.

“Opo, Papa,” pagsang-ayon naman ni Xevan kay Xiana.

“We can’t force your mother to stay here… Now, go back to your seat. I’ll prepare your favorite carbonara,” Xanthos said and turned off the stove.

Excited na umupo ang kambal sa upuan nila. Ipinaghanda naman sila ng plato ni Xanthos. Natigilan siya nang mapatingin sa akin.

“Come here, Kiara. Eat with us,” he said and prepared another plate for me.

Kahit nag-aalangan, lumapit ako sa kanila at umupo. Pinanood ko na lang si Xanthos habang pinaghahain kami. Naghanda siya ng gatas para sa kambal at juice para sa ’kin. Umupo na rin agad siya sa tabi ko pagkatapos maghain.

Napatingin ako sa carbonara na niluto n’ya. The carbonara he cooked really looks appetizing. I bit my lower lip and took my fork to have a taste.

“Wow,” I mumbled. My eyes widened and looked at Xanthos with disbelief in my eyes. He just smiled and scratched his eyebrow.

“Sabi po sa inyo, Mama. Super masarap magluto si Papa. Kaya po dito na lang po tayo lahat para palagi ka pong ipagluluto ni Papa!” sabi ni Xiana habang ganado sa pagkain.

“Wow, this is so good. I never thought you’ll be able to cook something this good other than menudo,” I said and giggled.

“Well, I have a weird memory with menudo so I stopped cooking it. If you still remember, you intentionally spilled yourself with it and we ended up making the twins–”

Agad kong tinakpan ang bibig ni Xanthos. Nagtatakang napatingin naman sa ’min ang kambal. Pakiramdam ko nag-akyatan ang lahat ng dugo sa mukha ko dahil sa kahihiyan. Bigla na naman tuloy pumasok sa isip ko ang mga kahihiyang ginawa ko kay Xanthos noon… Sobrang nakakahiya talaga kapag naaalala ko.

Xanthos removed my hand from covering his mouth and let out a refreshing laugh. I just glared at him and punched his muscled arm. Hindi na lang kami pinansin ng kambal at tumuloy na lang sa pagkain.

“H-How dare you remember such an embarrassing moment?” I asked while stuttering.

“Well, that embarrassing moment created two angels who are in front of us right now. So you shouldn’t regret that,” he said, still laughing.

Napaismid na lang ako at muling ibinalik ang atensyon ko sa carbonara. Bakit ko pa kasi binuksan ang topic sa menudo? Inaasar n’ya tuloy ako ngayon.

Hindi muna ako umalis kaagad pagkatapos kumain dahil sa request ng kambal. Nakipaglaro muna ako sa kanila rito.

“Hello, everybody! Kiarabog, alam naming nandito ka kaya h’wag ka ng magtago!”

Napapitlag ako sa gulat nang marinig ko ang boses ni Cadence. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at napirap. Ang lakas talaga ng tama ng lalaking ’yon kahit kailan.

“Sino ba’ng nagsabi na magtatago ako?” nakapamaywang na tanong ko at sinalubong sila.

Napakunot ang noo ko nang makitang kasama n’ya sina Denise at Xceron. Natigilan ako nang makitang kasama n’ya rin si Abi.

“Mareng Kiara, narinig ko ang tsismis na hiwalay na kayo ni Archer,” nakangiting sabi ni Denise. Abot tainga na yata ang ngiti ng baliw na babaeng ’to.

Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at tumango. Sabi na nga ba at siya ang pinakaunang matutuwa kapag nalaman na hiwalay na kami ni Archer.

“Abi… Kumusta na ang kuya mo?” tanong ko, bakas ang pag-aalala sa boses ko.

“He’s fine… mukhang matinding bugbog talaga ang inabot n’ya sa lalaking ’yan.” Itinuro n’ya si Xanthos na buhat si Xiana. “Pero keri naman,” matamlay na dagdag pa n’ya.

Natawa si Denise at inakbayan si Abi. “Mare, okay lang ’yan. Gano’n talaga ang buhay, e. Hindi naman kasalanan ni Kiara kung ’di siya tanggap ng mudrakels n’yo, diba? Saka mother’s instinct ang sinunod ni Kiara imbis na pag-ibig, ’yon na lang ang isipin mo,” nakangising sabi ni Denise.

Napatingin si Denise kay Xanthos. “Sir Xanthos, baka naman pakigalaw si Kiara–este ng baso pala,” sabi ni Denise saka napahagikhik.

Napailing na lang ako sa kadaldalan n’ya. Bakit ang dami n’ya yata masyadong alam? Mukhang nai-tsismis na ni Cad ang buong kwento sa kanilang lahat.

“Kiara, my friend. At dahil break na kayo ng Archer na ’yon. Magce-celebrate–este dadamayan ka namin sa pagluluksa mo. Napagplanuhan namin na mag-outing para sa celebration–este sa pagluluksa dahil single ka na ulit,” nakangising sabi ni Cadence.

Napataas ang kilay ko. Bakit masyado naman yata silang mukhang masaya na brokenhearted ako? Saka celebration ang tunog ng outing na sinasabi n’ya sa akin imbis na pagluluksa.

“H’wag kang mag-alala sa kambal dahil si Abi raw ang magbabantay sa kanila habang nasa beach tayo,” dagdag pa ni Cad.

“Bakit hindi na lang isama ang mga anak ko?” nakapamaywang na tanong ko.

“Marecakes, hindi pwede dahil may inuman na magaganap do’n. Gusto mo bang maaga mapariwara ’yang kambal? Sige na, pumayag ka na. Alam mo bang pupunta na ang mga kaibigan namin ni Xanthos pati mga girlfriend at asawa nila. Bawal ka ng tumanggi, mare. Mahiya ka naman sa kanila,” pangungulit pa ni Cad.

“Hindi papayag ang mga anak ko na iwan ko sila,” pagdadahilan ko na lang.

“Mama, okay lang po sa amin,” sabi ni Xiana.

Gusto kong mapasapo sa noo ko dahil pakiramdam ko wala na akong kawala sa sitwasyong ’to. Para saan ba kasi ang outing na ’to? Sobrang saya ba talaga nila na single na ulit ako?

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Wala naman siyang reaksyon sa narinig. Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at muling tumingin kay Cad.

“Oo na, sige na!”

TATLONG ARAW daw kaming mananatili sa beach na tinutukoy ni Cad. Kanya kanya kami ng way papunta ro’n at kay Xanthos na raw ako sumabay. Sa totoo lang medyo kinakabahan ako dahil alam kong mga kasamahan nila sa organisasyon nila ni Xanthos ang mga nandoon.

Hindi naman siguro sila sobrang sama kagaya ng iniisip ko.

“Do you want to eat something?” Xanthos asked while driving.

I just shook my head. “I’m not hungry.”

Natigilan ako nang mapansing nakikita ko na ang dagat sa nadadaanan namin. Medyo nakaramdam ako ng excitement. Ang tagal na rin pala noong huli akong nagpunta ng beach. Nawalan na ako ng time simula ng magtrabaho ako.

Makalipas pa ang ilang minuto, nakarating na kami ni Xanthos. Mas lalong umakyat ang kakaibang pakiramdam sa puso ko nang makakita ng maraming kotse na nakaparada.

Agad na bumaba ng kotse si Xanthos at pinagbuksan ako. Kinuha n’ya ang bag ko mula sa ’kin at siya ang nagbuhat no’n.

“So… let’s go?” Xanthos asked.

I just smiled and nodded.

Nagtungo kami sa malaking rest house. Talagang malaki ’yon at halos mapaawang ang labi ko sa ganda ng disenyo. Modern rest house ang style n’ya at hindi biro ang laki no’n.

Pumasok na kami sa loob. Bahagya akong napaatras nang makitang halos puro couple ang nasa loob at tila may kanya-kanyang mundo ang mga ’yon. Napakapit ako sa damit ni Xanthos at bahagyang napaatras.

“You’ll be fine, Kiara,” bulong ni Xanthos sa ’kin at marahang hinawakan ang likod ko.

“Mareng Kiara! Kanina ko pa kayo hinihintay punyemas kayo. Namuti na mga mata namin kakahintay, special kayo, ghorl?”

Tiningnan ko nang masama si Cadence dahil napatingin halos sa amin ang lahat dahil sa lakas ng boses n’ya.

“Halika, mareng Kiara. Ipapakilala kita sa kanila. Don’t be shy, mare. Isipin mo na lang na mga itlog sila,” sabi ni Cad at hinila ako palapit sa mga kaibigan nila.

“Ito kilala mo naman ’diba? Si Zakarius ’to saka ’yang pangit na katabi n’ya, asawa n’ya ’yan… Si Angel Mendoza,” sabi ni Cad.

Napaawang ang labi ko nang mamukhaan ang babae… Artista siya diba? Grabe, hindi ko inaakalang ganito siya kaganda sa personal.

“Hello, Kiara. Nice to meet you,” nakangiting sabi ni Angel at naglahad ng kamay. Napalunok ako at nakipagkamay sa kanya.

Ang lambot ng kamay n’ya, nakakahiya.

“Next naman, halika, mare. Ito naman kilala mo na rin. Si Ashteroh ’to, itong katabi n’ya, si Nathalie.”

Rainbow ang kulay ng buhok ni Nathalie pero bagay naman ’yon sa kanya. Bumagay ’yon sa features ng mukha n’ya.

“Hello, beh. Ang ganda mo. Akin ka na lang, iingatan ko ang imong heart–aray! Tangina naman, Ashteroh!” reklamo ni Nathalie nang batukan siya ni Ashteroh.

Natawa na lang ako dahil ang cute nilang dalawa.

“Okay tama na kayo. Next naman, kilala mo na rin, si Eron ’to tapos katabi n’ya si Cristina,” sabi ni Cad.

Mukhang hindi makabasag pinggan si Cristina. Mukha siyang mabait at talagang maamo ang mukha n’ya. Hindi ko maisip na si Eron ang nakatuluyan ng katulad n’ya.

“Hello, Kiara,” mahinhin na sabi ni Cristina at nahihiyang ngumiti sa akin.

“H-Hello,” sabi ko na lang din.

“Next malanding couple… Ito naman sina Pirius at Mary Faith.”

Napatingin ako kay Pirius, mukha siyang masungit at galit sa mundo. Nakayakap siya sa baywang ni Mary Faith na para bang ayaw na n’yang pakawalan ito.

“I told you just call me Faith, asshole!” asik ni Mary Faith kay Cad. “Don’t listen to him, Kiara. Please just call me, Faith,” nakangiting sabi n’ya.

“Okay, Faith,” nakangiting sabi ko na lang din.

“Ito namang dalawa, sina Remor at Cherry,” sabi naman ni Cad.

“Hi, Kiara,” nakangiting sabi ni Cherry.

“Hello, Cherry. Nice to meet you,” nakangiting bati ko rin sa kanya.

“Siyempre, save the best for last. Ito nga pala ang maganda kong girlfriend na hanggang ngayon hindi mo pa kilala kasi gusto ko pa-mysterious… Ito nga pala Kamelliah Jomelyn, Liah for short,” sabi ni Cad at inakbayan ang babaeng huli n’yang pinakilala.

Napaawang ang labi ko. Hindi ko alam na may babae na magagawang pumatol kay Cad.

“Shut up, bitch… Hindi mo ’ko girlfriend,” nakapamaywang na sabi ni Liah.

“Aw ’no, hindi na naman kita girlfriend. So kailan? Bukas na lang ulit gano’n? Bitch na bitch talaga datingan ko,” reklamo ni Cad.

“May reklamo ka, bitch? Kung ayaw mo, pwede na nating tapusin ang–”

“Sige po, I’m your bitch. Kiss mo na lang ang bitch na ’to para manahimik na,” sabi ni Cad saka niyakap si Liah.

Napakamot na lang ako sa batok ko dahil puro naglalandian ang mga tao sa paligid. Bakit kailangan kong maranasan ’to?

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos na wala namang kibo at nakatingin lang sa ’kin. Alanganing ngumiti na lang ako sa kanya.

“Okay, guys. Pag-uusapan na natin ang hatian sa kwarto… Since puro naman tayo mag-asawa at magjowa, couples na lang ang maghahati sa kwarto. Eight ang rooms dito, sakto sa eight couples. Okay na ba? Hahatid ko na kayo sa bawat room n’yo para malagay n’yo na mga gamit n’yo ro’n,” sabi ni Denise.

“D-Denise… Hindi kami couple ni Xanthos, it will be awkward for us to share a room,” I said and raised my hand.

Natigilan ako nang magkatinginan sila. Napakunot ang noo ko nang mapansing tila nagbubulungan sila lalo na ang mga babae.

“Pasensya na, mareng Kiara pero mas komportable ang mga babae rito na tumabi sa mga asawa nila kaya walang may balak tumabi sa ’yo. Wala namang malisya kung mag-share kayo sa kwarto ni Sir Xanthos, diba? Saka may mga anak na kayo, magkakahiyaan pa ba kayo? Hehe,” sabi ni Denise at nag-peace sign.

Napakurap na lang ako at napakamot sa batok ko. Muli akong napatingin kay Xanthos… Tamang desisyon ba na pumayag akong sumama rito?

Chapter Thirty-Two

“Don’t worry, I’ll sleep on the couch,” Xanthos said and put our bags on the couch.

“No, you can sleep here on the bed… I just hope things won’t be awkward for us, you know,” I just said and scratched my nape.

“Of course not. Just be comfortable, Kiara,” he said and smiled at me.

Napangiti na lang din ako at tumango. Umupo ako sa kama at marahang hinaplos ’yon, buti na lang talaga at malaki ’tong kama. Hindi kami gano’ng kalapit kapag nagtabi na kaming dalawa.

Natigilan kami nang makarinig ng katok. Agad na tumayo si Xanthos upanng buksan ang pinto. Bumungad sa kanya sina Denise at Angel.

“Sir Xanthos, pahiram muna kay mareng Kiara. Girl things ’to kaya bawal ka kumontra,” sabi ni Denise saka sinilip ako rito sa loob.

Napapailing na tumayo na lang ako at lumapit sa kanila.

“Sure, make her feel welcome and be good to her,” Xanthos said.

“Siyempre naman, boss. Sige ha, alis na kami. Let’s go Kiara girl,” sabi ni Denise at basta na lang akong hinila palabas ng kwarto namin ni Xanthos.

“Saan tayo pupunta?” tanong ko kay Denise.

“Magpapagandahan tayo ng katawan… Charot, alam kong wala kang dalang two piece dahil KJ ka kaya papahiramin ka ni Angel,” sabi ni Denise at itinuro si Angel na katabi n’ya.

“Nakakahiya naman,” sabi ko na lang at napakamot sa batok ko.

“H’wag ka ng mahiya, mare. Isipin mo naman, masusuot mo ang two piece ng isang Angel Mendoza. Saan ka pa diba? Sosyal ka teh kaya h’wag ka ng magpabebe,” sabi pa ni Denise.

Napatingin ako kay Angel, ngumiti siya sa ’kin at tumango na para bang sinasabi n’ya na okay lang sa kanya. Nahihiyang napangiti na lang din ako sa kanya.

Nagtungo na kami sa isang silid na parang fitting room ang style. Natigilan ako nang ingay ng girls ang agad na bumungad sa ’min. Mas lalo akong nahiya dahil mukhang nandito ang lahat ng babae ngayon at nakabihis na rin sila ng swimsuit, kami na lang nina Denise at Angel ang hindi pa. Parang nahihiya na tuloy akong magsuot no’n, hindi na kasi nawala ang kaunting stretch mark ko sa tiyan dahil sa pagbubuntis.

“Kiara girl! Hello!”

Nahihiyang napangiti na lang ako nang batiin nila ako. Mukhang hindi naman pala ako dapat kabahan. Hindi lang sila magaganda, mukhang mababait din.

“Ang ganda mo talaga, Kiara girl. Deserve mong makipagbalikan kay Xanthos,” sabi ni Nathalie saka yumakap sa braso ko.

Naiilang na natawa na lang ako. Mukhang hindi lang sina Cad at Denise ang Team Xanthos dito ah. Mukhang sila rin ay balak akong ibugaw kay Xanthos.

“Hanapan na natin siya ng swimsuit. Ang daming dinala ni Angel for her. Tayo na ang mamili para kay Kiara dahil mukha siyang shy type,” sabi naman ni Faith habang naghahalungkat na ng swimsuit sa bag.

Napakurap na lang ako nang magkagulo sila ro’n habang namimili ng sususotin ko. Napakamot na lang ako sa batok ko at napangiti. Si Cristina at Cherry naman ay hindi nakigulo at lumapit na lang sa ’kin. Silang dalawa lang yata ang tahimik sa kanila.

“Hello, Kiara… Hindi namin ine-expect na ganito kaganda ang Mommy ng mga anak ni Xanthos,” nakangiting sabi ni Cherry.

Nag-init ang mukha ko dahil sa pamumuri n’ya sa ’kin. “Salamat, Cherry. Sa totoo lang medyo nahihiya ako sa inyong lahat,” nahihiyang sabi ko saka ngumiti.

“Nahihiya rin ako pero wala akong nagagawa kapag hinihila ako ni Denise,” natatawang sabi naman ni Cristina.

Natigilan kami sa pag-uusap nang biglang pumagitna sa ’min si Denise.

“Mareng Kiara, isukat mo ’to! Luluwa ang mata ni Sir Xanthos kapag sinuot mo ’to, promise,” sabi ni Denise at inabot sa ’kin ang pulang two piece.

Nahihiyang napakamot ako sa batok ko. Nagsusuot naman ako ng mga ganito noon pero siyempre hindi na ’ko sanay ngayon.

“No, ito ang isuot mo, Kiara. I think mas maganda ’to,” sabi naman ni Liah saka ngumiti sa akin. Inabot n’ya sa ’kin ang mint green na one piece swimsuit.

“Kiara, how about this one? Ang girly diba? Baka magka-baby ulit kayo ni Xanthos kapag sinuot mo ’to,” sabi naman ni Angel at inabot sa ’kin ang peach colored two piece.

Alanganing napangiti na lang ako. Isang Denise pa lang ang sakit na sa ulo. Feeling ko ang dami ng Denise sa harapan ko ngayon.

“I’ll go for this,” sabi ko na lang at kinuha ang peach swimsuit na suggested ni Angel dahil ito ’yung hindi masyadong revealing kumpara sa iba.

Nagbihis na rin kami nina Denise. Muli akong nahiya nang pagkaguluhan na naman nila ako paglabas ko. Mukhang tama nga ang sinabi nina Cad na para sa ’kin ang outing na ’to. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang atensyon na binibigay ng girls sa ’kin.

“Ang ganda mo, mare. Deserve mo na madiligan,” sabi naman ni Nathalie na nagpa-init ng pisngi ko.

Napailing na lang ako sa pinag-uusapan nila. I just realized that it’s been a long time since I had sex with someone… but come to think of it, si Xanthos lang naman ang nag-iisang lalaki na naka-sex ko at wala ng iba.

“Wow, mareng Angel. Ganyan ka ka-sexy tapos kakapanganak mo lang last year. Sana all,” nakapamaywang na sabi ni Denise nang makapagsuot na ng two piece si Angel.

“Well, gano’n talaga…” mayabang na sabi ni Angel. “Hay, I miss my daughter already,” dagdag pa n’ya.

Na-miss ko rin tuloy bigla ’yung kambal.

Lumabas na rin kami agad pagkatapos naming magbihis lahat. Medyo nahihiya pa ’ko pero wala na ’kong nagawa nang nahila na ’ko ni Denise palabas.

“Ang ganda mo, mareng Liah. Pakagat nga,” sabi ni Cad at agad na yumakap kay Liah.

“My Angel looks ravishing as always,” sabi naman ni Zak at agad na pinaupo sa kandungan n’ya ang asawa.

“Xceron, wala kang balak purihin ako? Aba, galaw galaw,” nakapamaywang na sabi ni Denise.

Napangiti na lang si Xceron at hinila siya para yakapin. “Gandang ganda ka naman lagi sa sarili mo.”

Napangiwi na lang ako habang pinapanood silang maglandian sa paligid ko. Pakiramdam ko parang sinasadya na nila ang ipamukha sa ’kin na single na ako ngayon. Napailing na lang ako at lumabas ng rest house. Magpapapahid sana ako sa kanila ng sunblock pero mukhang busy silang lahat.

Titingnan ko na lang ang dagat. Mamaya pa naman ako mags-swimming dahil mainit pa.

Natigilan ako nang makita si Xanthos na nakaupo sa beach chair sa may lilim ng puno. Lumapit naman ako sa kanya at umupo sa beach chair na katabi ng inuupuan n’ya. Napalingon siya sa ’kin nang maramdaman n’ya ang presensya ko.

“Hey, why are you not with the other girls?” Xanthos asked.

I just chuckled and shook my head. “They are with their husbands, I felt out of place around them being lovey dovey,” I said while laughing.

Xanthos let out a laugh too. “Sorry about that. My friends are kinda different when they’re with their wives,” he said and scratched his eyebrow.

“It’s fine, I’m happy for them. They look contented and happy, it was a wonderful sight,” I said and closed my eyes.

Hindi na lang nagsalita si Xanthos sa tabi ko. Natahimik na lang din ako at dinama ang hangin. Medyo mainit ang singaw ng hangin pero hindi naman masakit sa balat. Binuksan ko na lang ang sunblock na dala ko at agad na pinahiran ang katawan ko. Napabuntonghininga ako nang likod ko na lang ang hindi ko malagyan. Napatingin ako kay Xanthos.

“Ahm, Xanthos… can you put some sunblock on my back… I mean, if you don’t mind,” I said and smiled shyly at him.

Xanthos didn’t say anything and just took the sunblock from my hand. “It’s fine,” he said.

Tumalikod ako sa kanya. Napapitlag na lang ako nang maramdaman ko ang marahang paglapat ng palad n’ya na may sunblock sa likod ko.

“Does it hurt?” Xanthos asked in a soft voice.

I shook my head. “No, it doesn’t. Please continue.”

Itinuloy na n’ya ang pagpahid sa likuran ko. Napakuyom ang kamao ko at pilit na pinipigilan ang sarili ko na mag-react sa balat n’ya na dumadampi sa likuran ko. His hands are still the same as before. Mainit pa rin ang mga kamay n’ya kapag dumadampi sa balat ko.

“It’s done,” he murmured and gave me the sunblock.

I faced him and smiled. “Thank you.”

Napatingin ako sa kanya. Nakasuot pa rin siya ng sando pero litaw na litaw ang matipunong braso n’ya. Napatingin na lang ako sa sunblock na hawak ko.

“Xanthos, you should put sunblock too, para hindi masaktan ang balat mo,” sabi ko at inabutan siya ng sunblock.

“Will you put some on my back too?” he asked and chuckled.

“Oo naman. Tanggalin mo ’yang sando mo, lalagyan din kita sa likod,” sabi ko at tumayo saka lumapit sa kanya.

“Ahm, I-I’m just kidding. It’s not necessary,” sabi na lang ni Xanthos.

My eyes narrowed. “It’s necessary. Kapag nagka-sunburn ka, ikaw rin ang magsu-suffer. Sige na, sa likod lang naman kita lalagyan. Ikaw na ang bahala sa iba,” sabi ko na lang saka binuksan ang sunblock.

Napabuntonghininga na lang si Xanthos at hinubad ang sando n’ya. Napatikhim na lang ako at napaiwas ng tingin sa maganda n’yang katawan. Sa pagkakatanda ko, nasa 40 years old na siya ngayon… pero bakit mas lalo lang gumanda ang katawan n’ya? It’s honestly unfair.

Pinahiran ko na ng sunblock ang likod n’ya. Hindi naman siya nakibo at hinayaan lang ako. Pakiramdam ko nanliliit ang kamay ko sa likod n’ya. He has scars on his back but it just made him more appealing, and his tattoos too. They really look appealing and it suited Xanthos’ manly and domineering aura.

“Xevan wants to have tattoos too because of you,” I said and chuckled.

Natigilan si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. “Sorry about that.”

“You don’t have to. I’m not against it anyway. Hahayaan ko siya kapag nasa tamang edad na siya. Tattoo is an art too, there’s nothing wrong with it,” sabi ko na lang saka inabot sa kanya ang sunblock matapos kong pahiran ang likod n’ya.

Napangiti si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. “I can really see why the twin always calls you the best mother,” Xanthos said while smiling.

“I can also see why they are calling you the best father.” I chuckled.

Matagal din kaming nag-usap ni Xanthos dito. Mas okay na sa ’kin ang makipagkwentuhan sa kanya rito kaaysa makita ang mga naglalandiang couple sa loob ng rest house na ’yon.

Tinawag din naman kami ni Denise para kumain kaya wala kaming choice kundi ang bumalik sa loob. Sina Cad ang nagluluto ng mga pagkain. Puro seafood ang pagkain na pabor naman sa ’kin dahil mahilig ako ro’n. Umupo na ako sa pwesto ko, agad namang umupo si Xanthos sa tabi ko.

“Mga mare, for today swimming muna at kainan ang plano. Bukas na ang mga laro, naghanda kami ni Nathalie ng mga kalokohan–este laro bukas kaya bawal ang KJ. Ang KJ ipapabaril ko kay Xceron, bawal ang KJ ha, Kiara?” sabi ni Denise at agad akong tiningnan.

Napaismid na lang ako at tumango. Sa totoo lang hindi maganda ang kutob ko sa laro laro na sinasabi n’ya lalo kung siya ang nagplano.

“Ito na ang pagkain n’yo, mga boss,” sabi ni Cad at inihain na ang mga inihaw at niluto nila.

Kumuha ako ng alimasag dahil paborito ko ’yon. Napakamot na lang ako sa batok ko nang maalalang hindi nga pala ako marunong magbukas no’n.

“Akin na, I’ll open it for you,” sabi ni Xanthos saka kinuha ang alimasag sa akin para siya ang magbukas.

“Ganyan dapat ang galawan, pare,” sabi ni Eron saka napapalakpak pa.

“I’m proud of you, man. Akala ko hindi ka na talaga gagalaw,” sabi ni Ashteroh at nakipag-apir pa kina Cad.

“Shut the fuck up,” mariing sabi na lang ni Xanthos at muling nag-focus sa pagbubukas ng alimasag.

Napangiti na lang ako nang mapansing nahihirapan din siyang buksan ’yon pero hindi na lang ako nagsalita. Ayoko namang sirain ang effort n’ya sa ginagawa n’ya.

Halos hindi na makakain si Xanthos dahil pinagbubuksan n’ya lang ako nang pinagbubuksan ng seafood pero hindi siya nagrereklamo. Kung hindi ko pa nga siya hahatian sa pagkain ko baka hindi na talaga siya nakakain.

“Ganyan dapat, mareng Kiara. Parehas dapat kayong nagalaw ni Sir Xanthos para layag na layag talaga ang ship,” nakangising sabi ni Denise.

Napailing na lang ako sa mga kalokohan n’ya. Pakiramdam ko isa talaga siya sa kasabwat ni Cadence dito.

Nang lumipas na ang bandang hapon, napagdesisyunan na naming mag-swimming dahil hindi na gaanong masakit sa balat ang araw. Hinila ako nina Denise at medyo lumayo kaming girls sa mga lalaki.

“Kiara, ito legit na tanong… Wala ba talaga kayong chance na magbalikan ni Sir Xanthos?” tanong ni Denise at napakagat pa sa kuko n’ya.

Nakatitig lang silang pito sa akin na tila hinihintay ang sagot ko. Alanganing napangiti na lang ako.

“Magkaibigan na lang kami ni Xanthos. Saka ano ka ba? Kakahiwalay lang namin ni Archer, binubugaw mo na agad ako,” napapailing na sabi ko na lang.

“Obvious naman kasi na hindi mo minahal si Archer kagaya ng naging pagmamahal mo kay Sir Xanthos. Kinilig ka lang nang slight sa comfort na kayang ibigay ni Archer. Tingnan mo nga ang sarili mo ngayon, hindi ka masyadong malungkot na naghiwalay kayo hindi tulad ng kay Sir Xanthos noon,” paglalaban pa ni Denise.

“Woah, intriguing,” komento ni Angel.

“Wala akong time na malungkot dahil ang kulit mo,” napapailing na sabi ko na lang.

“Ay gaga, ako pa ang ginawang excuse. Awit sa ’yo, mare,” napapangiwing sabi ni Denise.

Napangiti na lang ako at inilublob ang katawan ko sa tubig.

“To be honest, pinayagan kong manligaw si Archer dahil nararamdaman ko sa sarili ko na hinihintay kong mag-first move si Xanthos. Nakokonsensya pa rin ako kapag naiisip ko na nagawa ko ’yon kay Archer… pero minahal ko naman talaga siya,” sabi ko na lang saka napayakap sa sarili ko.

Napasinghap si Denise at napatakip sa bibig n’ya. “What the fuck, mare? Totoo ba ’yan? Ibig sabihin almost five years ka palang naghihintay na kumilos si Xanthos, gano’n?” tila hindi makapaniwalang tanong ni Denise.

I smiled and nodded. “Parang gano’n na nga… Pero wala siyang ginawa, isa lang ang ibig sabihin no’n diba? Ibig sabihin, hindi n’ya ’ko mahal. Kaya hindi n’yo na dapat ipagpilitan pa ang sa amin. Okay na kami sa ganito,” sabi ko na lang.

“Ano’ng hindi mahal?! Mahal na mahal ka kaya–” agad na tinakpan ni Liah ang bibig ni Denise.

“Shut up, Denise. Let Xanthos say that,” bulong ni Liah. Binatukan naman nina Faith si Denise.

Napailing na lang ako at muling lumublob sa tubig. Mas okay na rin ang ganito kami ni Xanthos. Hindi kami magkakasakitan kapag ganito lang kami. Mas maganda ang magkaibigan lang kami.

“Are you sure, Kiara? I can sleep on the couch. Kasya naman ako ro’n,” sabi ni Xanthos saka umupo sa kama.

“Yes, I’m sure. Masyado namang malaki ang kama kung ako lang mag-isa ang matutulog dito, saka may tiwala naman ako sa ’yo,” sabi ko na lang at humiga saka nagkumot.

Kahit nag-aalangan, humiga na lang din si Xanthos pero dumistansya siya nang kaunti sa akin. Napapikit na lang ako at binalot ang sarili ko sa kumot. Hanggang ngayon ang lamig ng katawan ko dahil sa matagal na pags-swimming. Mahina pa naman ako sa lamig.

“Kiara, are you alright?” tila nag-aalalang tanong ni Xanthos.

Idinilat ko ang mga mata ko at tumingin sa kanya. Nakaharap siya sa akin ngayon.

“O-Okay lang ako, medyo nilalamig lang,” sabi ko na lang saka tipid na ngumiti.

Napabuntonghininga siya at bahagyang lumapit sa ’kin. “Come here, I’ll hug you.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. “H-Ha? I-I’m fine, you don’t have to.”

“I won’t do anything, I’ll just hug you. My body is kinda hot, I mean, literally. It will help you ease the cold you’re feeling,” he said and tapped the space beside him.

I just bit my lower lip and nodded. Lumapit ako sa kanya. Hinawakan n’ya ang baywang ko at bahagya akong hinila saka pinaunan sa braso n’ya. Napayakap na lang ako sa kanya nang ikulong n’ya ako sa mga bisig n’ya.

Pakiramdam ko nawala agad ang lamig na nararamdaman ko. Totoo nga ang sinabi n’ya, mainit nga talaga ang katawan n’ya. Gumanti ako ng yakap sa kanya at napapikit.

His familiar scent is giving me a nostalgic feeling. His warm hug felt familiar as if my heart and my body recognizes it. I just sighed and buried my face on his chest.

Naramdaman ko ang marahang paghaplos n’ya sa buhok ko. Napakapit na lang ako nang mahigpit sa damit n’ya nang may maramdaman akong kakaiba sa tiyan ko.

This is just because of his warmth. Right, this has no meaning. His warmth is just overwhelming, that’s it.

Chapter Thirty-Three

Dahan-dahan kong idinilat ang mga mata ko. Napabuntonghininga ako nang nakaramdam nang mabigat na nakadagan sa baywang ko. Natigilan na lang ako nang mapansing nakayakap ang braso ni Xanthos do’n.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos na nakapikit pa rin. Minsan ko lang siya makitang tulog na ganito. Nasabi rin sa ’kin noon ni Cadence na hirap makatulog si Xanthos at madalas hindi na lang siya natutulog.

I bit my lower lip and just stared at his sleeping face. Nahiya ang pilikmata ko sa kanya, mas mahaba pa yata ang sa kanya kaysa sa akin. Sa lahat ng lalaki, sa kanya ko lang nakita na bagay ang gano’ng pilikmata.

I gently touched his clean shaved jaw. He’s always leaving stubbles on his face before. Pero nasabi ni Xiana na ayaw n’ya ang may gano’n sa mukha ni Xanthos kaya siguro lagi na siyang nagsh-shave ng balbas. Napangiti na lang ako.

Napapitlag ako nang marahang idinilat ni Xanthos ang mga mata n’ya. Agad akong lumayo nang kaunti pero agad n’ya rin akong hinila palapit sa kanya.

“Good morning,” he whispered.

I gasped when I heard how sexy his voice was. His husky voice complimented his sexy morning look. How can someone be this attractive at the moment of waking up? This is not fair anymore.

I bit the insides of my cheeks and avoided his gaze. “I-I need to take a bath,” I muttered.

Itinuro ko ang braso n’yang nakayakap pa rin sa baywang ko na para bang sinasabi ko na alisin n’ya ’yon. Tila natauhan naman si Xanthos at agad na inalis ang braso n’yang nakayakap sa ’kin.

“Oh, sorry. Go ahead, take a bath,” he said and stood up. He disheveled his curly hair and stretched his body.

Tila nakahinga ako nang maluwag nang makalayo na siya sa ’kin. Kanina ko pa kasi pinipigil ang paghinga ko sa hindi ko malamang dahilan. Napailing na lang ako at kumuha ng damit sa bag ko saka nagtungo sa banyo para maligo.

Pagkatapos kong maligo, naabutan ko si Xanthos na nakaupo pa rin sa kama at tila naghihintay sa ’kin.

“Ahm, ikaw naman ang maligo,” sabi ko na lang saka alanganing ngumiti sa kanya.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit nakakaramdam ako ngayon ng awkwardness sa kanya samantalang siya naman ay walang nararamdamang pagka-ilang. Napailing na lang ako.

Hindi ko na nagawang hintayin si Xanthos, lumabas na agad ako ng kwarto namin pagkatapos kong magbihis ng beach dress. Nagsuot na rin ako ng swimsuit sa loob no’n.

“Kiara! Good morning!”

I just smiled when I saw them preparing breakfast. I think I should help them out too.

“Good morning,” nakangiting bati ko sa girls. “Nasaan ang mga asawa n’yo?” tanong ko nang makitang wala sina Cad.

“Nasa labas sila, sabi namin maghanap dila ng panggatong,” sabi ni Nathalie saka kumagat sa apple.

Napangiti na lang ako at napailing. Mukhang sa mga babaeng ’to lang lumalambot ang mga tigasing lalaki na ’yon.

“Kumusta naman ang tulog kasama si Sir Xanthos, Kiara?” nakangising tanong ni Denise. Nagtaas-baba pa talaga ng kilay ang loka.

“Ayos lang,” sabi ko na lang saka uminom ng tubig.

“We don’t want a vague answer, Kiara girl. We need a detailed answer,” Angel said and crossed her arms.

I just chuckled and shook my head. “We just slept, nothing special happened,” I said.

“Ay wow, grabe sa hina ng manok natin, girls. Akala ko pa naman naging mainit na ng tuluyan ang gabi ni mareng Kiara. Ilang taon ng walang dilig ang mare natin, aba,” napapailing na sabi ni Denise.

Hinampas ko ang braso n’ya. Kahit kailan talaga ang babaeng ’to, ang sarap sabunutan.

“My night was warm though,” I murmured and smiled unconsciously.

“Bakit?” bulong din ni Denise.

Tinakpan ko na lang ang mukha n’ya at bahagyang itinulak palayo sa ’kin. Napanguso na lang si Denise at nagmaktol.

“Pa-mysterious, bahala ka, magkaanak sana kayo ng sampu ni Sir Xanthos,” bulong n’ya.

Wala kaming ginawa maghapon kundi ang kumain, mag-swimming, at maglaro. Hindi ko na maalala ang huling beses na nakapag-enjoy ako nang ganito. Next time nga ay pupunta ulit ako sa beach at isasama ko ang kambal.

Nang sumapit na ang gabi, gumawa ng bonfire ang mga lalaki. Maglalaro na naman daw kami na pakana ni Denise. Malamang hindi ko magugustuhan ang mga ganyang laro n’ya.

“Bawal may malagpasan ha. Typical na truth or dare lang naman laro natin, pero kapag hindi nagawa ang dare o hindi nasagot ang tanong, kailangang uminom ng basong puno ng alak. Malakas ang tama nito, guys. Kung ako sa inyo game na lang,” sabi ni Denise saka inangat ang bote na walang laman.

Napakamot na lang ako sa batok ko. Napatingin ako kay Xanthos na nasa tabi ko ngayon. Tahimik na nakikinig lang siya sa mga sinasabi ni Denise.

“Okay! Game na!”

Napabuntonghininga na lang ako. Sana walang kalokohan na ipagawa sa ’kin ang mga ’to kung sakali… pero duda ako ro’n lalo na kay Denise. Malamang siya pa ang mangunguna sa kalokohan.

Kinakabahan ako sa tuwing naikot ang bote. Umaakyat ang kaba ko sa tuwing titigil ’yon… buti na lang hindi pa ako natuturo ng boteng ’yon.

“Cadence, I dare you to suck your toe,” nakataas-kilay na sabi ni Angel.

Napahagalpak naman ang lahat sa sinabi nito. Maski ako at natawa rin.

“Tangina naman nito, anong klaseng dare ’yan?! Ang panget,” reklamo ni Cad.

“Gagawin mo ba o hindi?” nakapamaywang na tanong ni Angel.

“Hindi! Tanginang ’yan, gago ba ako?” Kinuha ni Cad ang basong puno ng alak at ininom ’yon.

Natawa na lang ang lahat sa naging reaksyon n’ya. Muli ng pinaikot ni Denise ang bote at kay Remor naman sumunod na tumutok ang bote.

“Truth or dare?” tanong ni Denise.

Remor scratched his nape. “Truth.”

“Kailan ang huling beses na pumatay ka ng tao?” nakataas-kilay na tanong ni Denise.

Natigilan si Remor sa tanong n’ya at napatingin kay Cherry. Mukhang aware ang mga babae rito kung anong klaseng organisasyon ang pinapatakbo ng mga lalaki.

“Pare, h’wag mo ng tangkain magsinungaling dahil alam namin kung kailan ’yon huling nangyari,” nakangising sabi ni Eron saka yumakap sa baywang ni Cristina.

Akmang iinom ng alak si Remor pero agad siyang pinigilan ni Cherry.

“Sagutin mo ’yung tanong ni Denise,” sabi ni Cherry saka ngumiti nang kakaiba kay Remor.

Napalunok si Remor at napakamot sa batok n’ya. “I-It was last month, believe me, I didn’t intend to do that,” paliwanag ni Remor.

Nagtawanan sina Cad sa naging reaksyon ni Remor.

“Under na under naman tayo n’yan, pare,” natatawang sabi ni Cad at binato ng canned beer na walang laman si Remor.

“Shut up, moron!” naiinis na sabi ni Remor.

Napailing na lang ako habang nakikitawa sa kanila. Sobrang kukulit nila.

“Tangina, ba’t ako na naman mga mare?” reklamo ni Cad nang sa kanya tumutok ang nguso ng bote.

“Cad, truth or dare?” nakangising tanong ni Angel.

Nakita naming kinabahan si Cad. Alam n’ya kasi na puro kalokohan at talagang nakakahiya ang mga pinapagawa sa kanya ni Angel.

“Truth na lang, mare. Bati na tayo, Angel. Please be good to me,” pakiusap ni Cad.

Napangisi si Angel. “Who is your first love? Don’t lie, Cad. Alam kong nandito ang first love mo,” nakangising sabi ni Angel.

Napakamot si Cad sa batok n’ya. “Tanga ka ba? Hindi n’yo kilala first love ko. Si Ailee kaya first love ko,” sabi na lang ni Cad at napaismid.

“Na-uh, sabi mo puppy love lang ’yung kay Ailee before… Nandito ’yung first love mo,” sabi naman ni Angel.

Napabuntonghininga si Cadence at napakamot sa batok n’ya. Natigilan ako nang mapatingin siya sa akin.

“Si Kiara first love ko, ang landi n’ya kasi dati. Pero ngayon si Liah na lang ang malanding nagpapatibok ng puso ko. Yiee! I’m your bitch talaga, baby,” sabi ni Cad saka yumakap kay Liah.

Napakurap na lang ako sa nalaman ko. Hindi ko alam na nagkaroon ng romantic feelings si Cad sa ’kin noon. Hindi naman kasi halata dahil puro siya kalokohan kahit noon pa.

“Pareng Xanthos, it’s your turn… Pero dahil truth na ang sinabi ni Cad, hindi ka pwede mag-truth. Dare ang sa ’yo,” nakangising sabi ni Eron.

Xanthos sighed and nodded.

Napangisi sina Cad at nagkatinginan. Mukhang kalokohan ang ipapagawa nila kay Xanthos ah.

“Pareng Xanthos, dare namin sa ’yo… sexy dance ka sa harapan ni Kiara, walang music,” sabi ni Cad saka napahagalpak ng tawa.

Nagtawanan na rin ’yung iba. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko para magpigil ng tawa. Napatingin ako kay Xanthos, wala siyang reaksyon sa dare ni Cad.

Akmang kukuhanin na ni Xanthos ang baso na may alak pero agad siyang pinigilan ni Zak.

“Xanthos, it’s your first time doing a dare… Don’t be a kill joy,” Zak said and smirked.

“Sige na, Xanthos…” sabi ko na lang habang natatawa.

“Yon oh! Si Kiara na ang nag-request. Magagawa mo bang tanggihan ang nanay ng mga anak mo, pare? H’wag gano’n, pangit ’yon,” pamimilit pa ni Cad.

Natigilan si Xanthos at napatitig sa ’kin. Napabuntonghininga siya saka tumayo. Napatakip ako sa bibig ko nang talagang pumwesto siya sa harapan ko… Gagawin n’ya ba talaga?

“I’ll kill you after this, Cad,” mariing sabi ni Xanthos saka huminga nang malalim.

Naghiyawan sila at nagsimulang i-cheer si Xanthos. Napabuga ng hangin si Xanthos bago nagsimulang sumayaw. Mas lalong lumakas ang hiyawan nila maski ako na kanina pa tahimik ay napahiyaw rin sa gulat… Hindi ko alam na marunong mag-sexy dance si Xanthos.

Pakiramdam ko pulang pula ang mukha ko ngayon dahil nasa harapan ko pa man din siya.

Tinakpan nina Cad ang mga mata ng mga girlfriend at asawa nila dahil tila nagiging heart shape ang mga mata ng mga ’to. Napatakip ako sa bibig ko habang hindi maalis ang tingin ko kay Xanthos.

Binato ng canned beer ni Pirius si Xanthos.

“Stop it, Xanthos! You’re seducing my wife!” reklamo ni Pirius habang nakatakip sa mga mata ni Faith na pilit inaalis ang kamay nito sa mga mata n’ya.

Bumalik na si Xanthos sa tabi ko pagkatapos n’yang sumayaw. Napahawak ako sa magkabilang pisngi ko dahil hindi ako makamove on sa nangyari.

“Gago, Xanthos. Kapag naghirap ka pwede kang mag-apply na macho dancer. Bentang benta ka ro’n, legit,” sabi ni Cad at nag-thumbs up pa.

“Fuck you,” sabi ni lang ni Xanthos at binato ng canned beer na walang laman si Cad.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Hindi siya makatingin nang ayos sa ’kin ngayon at hindi rin nakakawala sa ’kin ang pamumula ng tainga n’ya. Napangiti na lang ako at bahagyang dinutdot ang braso n’ya. Nahihiyang napalingon siya sa ’kin.

“I didn’t know that you’re a good dancer,” I murmured and let out a giggle.

Xanthos covered my face with his hand. I just laughed and removed his hand on my face.

“Are you embarrassed? You shouldn’t be, you’re talented. You really should become a macho dancer or something,” pang-aasar ko pa sa kanya.

“Stop, Kiara… I did it because you requested it. Stop teasing me,” he said while avoiding my gaze.

“Thank you for that performance, Sir. You are truly talented,” I mumbled and pinched his muscled arm gently.

“Guys, pwede na nating itigil ’to. Kiara, doon na kayo sa kwarto n’yo ni Xanthos at gumawa na kayo ng kapatid ng kambal. Please lang,” sabi ni Denise.

Tiningnan ko siya nang masama saka binato rin siya ng walang laman na canned beer. Kahit kailan talaga ang babaeng ’to, walang filter ang bibig.

Muli na kaming bumalik sa paglalaro… at dumating na nga ang kinatatakutan ko. Tumapat sa ’kin ang nguso ng bote.

“Kiara, my dear friend… Truth or dare?” nakangising tanong ni Denise.

Natahimik ako. Hindi ako pwedeng uminom kung sakaling di ko kayang sagutin ang tanong o gawin ang dare dahil ito ang unang beses na tumapat sa ’kin ang bote. Saan ba ako mas safe? Kung truth ang pipiliin ko, malamang tungkol kay Xanthos ang itatanong nila sa akin… pero kung dare, mapapahiya man ako pero saglit lang siguro.

“Ahm… Dare,” sabi ko na lang.

Naghiyawan ang girls sa sinabi ko. Mas lalo akong kinabahan nang makitang bumubulong sina Angel kay Denise. Lumaki ang ngiti ni Denise.

“Okay, mareng Kiara. Ang dare namin sa ’yo… Sabihin mo sa ’ming lahat ang sinabi mo kahapon sa aming girls. ’Yung sinabi mo na dahilan kung bakit mo pinayagang manligaw si Archer sa ’yo.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi ni Denise. Bumigat ang hangin nang mapatingin sa akin ang lahat. Pasimple akong tumingin kay Xanthos na nakatitig lang sa ’kin na tila hinihintay ang sasabihin ko.

“A-Ayoko…” nauutal na sabi ko at napailing.

“Mareng Kiara, walang ganyanan,” nakangising sabi ni Nathalie.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko nang kumabog nang malakas ang dibdib ko. Napabuntonghininga ako at saglit na napatingin kay Xanthos. Agad din akong napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya at napahawak nang mahigpit sa laylayan ng dress ko.

“P-Pinayagan kong manligaw si Archer noon dahil hinihintay kong mag-first move si Xanthos. I-I waited for him to do so for five years and I got tired waiting… But don’t get me wrong, I-I really did love Archer,” sabi ko saka muling napatingin kay Xanthos.

Agad na naghiyawan ang lahat sa sinabi ko. Pati ang mga lalaki lalo na sina Cad ay napahiyaw at pinaikot-ikot pa ang damit nito.

“Tangina, ayan ang sinasabi ko, pareng Xanthos! Wooh!”

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Tila hindi makapaniwalang nakatingin siya sa ’kin. Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko habang nakikipaglabanan ng tingin sa kanya.

“I told you, pare. Dapat dati ka pa kumilos,” nakangising sabi ni Ashteroh kay Xanthos.

Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya at napatikhim. Ang lakas ng kabog ng puso ko. Nanlalamig din ang mga kamay ko kasabay ng panginginig ng mga tuhod ko.

Hanggang sa matapos ang larong ’yon at makarating ako sa kwarto ko… nararamdaman ko pa rin ang pamumula ng mukha ko dahil sa kahihiyan. Nagpaiwan sina Xanthos sa labas at nag-inuman pa silang mga lalaki.

Napahiga na lang ako sa kama pagkatapos kong mag-shower at yumakap sa isang unan. Hindi ako mapakali… Gusto kong malaman ang iniisip ni Xanthos at ang reaksyon n’ya sa sinabi ko kanina. Paano kung bigla siyang umiwas sa ’kin dahil do’n at maging awkward na naman kami?

Makalipas pa ang ilang minuto. Narinig kong bumukas ang pinto. Napabangon ako nang makitang pumasok na si Xanthos sa silid namin. Umupo siya sa kama habang nakahawak sa sentido n’ya.

Tumayo ako at lumapit sa kanya. Napatingin naman siya sa ’kin.

“O-Okay ka lang ba?” nag-aalalang tanong ko.

Napatingin ako sa sentido n’ya. Napasinghap ako nang makitang may maliit na bukol siya ro’n.

“Ano’ng nangyari diyan? Bakit ka nagkabukol?” nag-aalalang tanong ko.

“It’s nothing, nagkauntugan lang kami ni Cad,” sabi na lang n’ya saka nahihiyang napakamot sa batok n’ya.

Marahan kong hinawakan ang bukol n’ya. Tiningnan ko ang reaksyon n’ya, hindi naman siya nag-react kaya sa tingin ko hindi naman ’yon masakit.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing nakatitig siya sa ’kin. Medyo namumula na ang leeg at tainga n’ya dahil siguro nakainom siya.

“Lasing ka na ba?” tanong ko.

Umiling naman siya. “Not really, konting tama lang.”

Napatango na lang ako. Nanatili pa rin siyang nakatitig sa ’kin. Napahawak na lang ako sa braso ko dahil sa matiim na tingin n’ya. Hindi ko alam kung iiwas ba ako ng tingin o patuloy na makikipaglabanan ng titig sa kanya.

“Kiara, d-did you… did you really wait for me?” he asked in a low tone.

I bit the insides of my cheeks and avoided his gaze. “T-That was before,” I muttered.

Xanthos held my wrist and pulled me closer to him. I lost my balance and accidentally sat on his lap. I gasped and held his shoulder for support.

“I should have known,” he murmured and gave me a faint smile.

I gulped while staring at him. My hands became sweaty and I suddenly don’t know what to do.

Patuloy siyang nakatitig sa ’kin. Marahan n’yang hinawakan ang pisngi ko nang bumaba sa labi ko ang tingin n’ya.

“Can I kiss you?” he mumbled and gently touched my bottom lip with his thumb.

Hindi ko alam kung ano ang nagtulak sa ’kin. Yumakap ako sa batok n’ya at marahan siyang hinila palapit sa ’kin.

“Y-Yes,” I answered and looked at his lips too.

Hindi na nagsayang ng oras si Xanthos at agad na siniil ng halik ang labi ko. I instantly responded and hugged his nape tighter.

Xanthos held my back and pulled me closer to him as our kiss deepened. My mind suddenly becomes clouded. I don’t know why my body is not listening to me at all. I can taste the beer in his mouth but it just added fire to our hot kiss.

I moaned against his kisses when I felt his tongue having its way inside my mouth. His hand went down to my leg and gently caressed it while kissing me passionately. My heart is beating so hard and I can feel a familiar tingling sensation in my stomach. His hands, his touch feels so familiar, it feels nostalgic… like I truly belong in his arms.

He gently bit my lower lip and sucked it. He let out a sexy groan and hugged my waist with his other arm. I gripped his hair while kissing him with equal fervor.

“Hmm…” I moaned when his hot tongue ran on my bottom lip. My heart beats faster when his lips reached my jaw, down to my neck.

“X-Xanthos…” I mumbled and gripped his shoulder for support.

Pareho kaming hinihingal nang matapos ang halikan namin. He looked at me with his drunk-like eyes. I can almost see the fire in his eyes.

He gave little kisses to my lips, down to my chin, down to my neck. I just hugged him tighter and closed my eyes. My whole body is shivering in excitement… I guess he’s still the man who can make my knees weak with just his simple kiss.

Xanthos hugged me and buried his face on my neck. He murmured something in my ear.

“You just made me want to be selfish again, Kiara.”

Chapter Thirty-Four

“Mga mare, gusto pa sana namin magtagal ’to kaso busy tayo sa kanya kanyang life. Sana maulit ’to guys, bye! Ingat kayo sa biyahe!” paalam ni Denise at kumaway sa ’min bago sumakay sa kotse ni Xceron.

“Bye, girls. I had a great time with you all. Sana makapag-chikahan tayo ulit next time,” sabi naman ni Angel bago sila umalis ni Zak.

Nagpaalam na rin ako sa kanila bago ako pinagbuksan ng kotse ni Xanthos. Sumakay na lang din siya agad sa loob pagkasakay ko. Natahimik na lang ako at minabuting tumingin sa labas.

Kanina ko pa siya hindi kinikibo, pagkagising pa lang namin. Hindi naman sa ayaw ko siyang kausapin, sadyang nahihiya lang ako nang sobra sa nangyari kagabi. Kung pwede lang talaga burahin ko sa isip n’ya ang nangyari kagabi para lang maging normal ulit kaming dalawa.

“Do you want to eat something?” Xanthos asked while his eyes is still on the road. He’s always asking that… kahit ano pa’ng sitwasyon namin.

“I-I’m not hungry,” I answered and just closed my eyes.

Magpapanggap na lang ako na tulog para hindi na n’ya ako kausapin.

Natahimik na siya nang mapansing nakapikit ako. Pilit kong pinakakalma ang paghinga ko pati na rin ang nag-iingay kong puso. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang nakain ko kagabi at pumayag akong makipaghalikan sa kanya… Ano na lang ang iisipin n’ya tungkol sa ’kin?

Pasimple akong napahawak sa labi ko. Halos hindi ako nakatulog nang ayos kagabi. Hindi ko maalala kung anong oras na ’ko nakatulog habang si Xanthos tulog na tulog na sa tabi ko.

Paano n’ya nagawang matulog nang mahimbing sa kabila ng nangyari?

I just shook my head and screamed internally. I really couldn’t handle this anymore. Mababaliw ako kakaisip at kaka-overthink. Naiinis ako na sobrang cool lang ni Xanthos sa mga nangyayari habang ako para ng masisiraan ng bait dito.

“I’m thinking about it too.”

Natigilan ako at bahagyang napadilat saka lumingon kay Xanthos nang magsalita siya. Nagtatakang napatingin ako sa kanya.

“Ha? What do you mean?” I asked.

“Our kiss last night, I’m thinking about it too… Hindi rin ako mapakali, Kiara,” sabi n’ya habang nasa daan pa rin ang tingin.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing bahagyang namumula ang tainga pababa sa leeg n’ya. Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko upang pigilan ang sarili ko na mapangiti sa hitsura n’ya ngayon.

Minabuti ko na lang na hindi magsalita at muling pumikit. Hindi ko alam kung bakit sumaya ako nang kaunti nang malaman na hindi lang ako ang hindi mapakali tungkol sa nangyari. Akala ko talaga ako lang ang nag-iisip ng nangyari.

PAGKARATING NAMIN sa pad ni Xanthos, agad akong bumaba ng kotse. Si Xanthos na ang nagbitbit ng bag namin pareho at agad ding sumunod sa ’kin.

Excited na pumasok ako sa loob at naabutan ko ang kambal sa living room habang nakikipaglaro kay Abi. Agad akong napangiti nang makita ang mga anak ko.

Napalingon sila sa akin. Agad na napasinghap si Xiana at dali daling tumakbo papalapit sa akin. Gano’n din naman si Xevan.

“Mama! We missed you so much!” hiyaw ni Xiana at nagtatatalon habang nakayakap pa rin sa baywang ko.

“Mama…” sabi naman ni Xevan saka yumakap din sa ’kin.

“Na-miss ko rin kayo, mga baby ko.” Lumuhod ako at pinupog ng halik ang mukha nila. Todo hagikhik naman sila na ang sarap pakinggan.

Napalingon si Xiana sa likuran ko. “Papa!”

Nagsilipatan ang kambal kay Xanthos at agad na nagpabuhat dito. Sabay na binuhat ni Xanthos ang kambal. Napayakap naman silang dalawa sa leeg ni Xanthos at halatang tuwang tuwa rin sila na makita ang Papa nila.

“Papa! Meron na po ba kaming new sister?” excited na tanong ni Xiana.

Pakiramdam ko nasamid ako sa tanong n’ya. Maski si Xanthos ay halatang natigilan.

“W-Where did you get that ridiculous idea?” Xanthos asked and looked at me.

“Sabi po ni Ninang Denise, pagbalik n’yo raw pong dalawa galing sa beach, magkakaroon na raw po kami ng new sister or brother ni Kuya Xevan,” sabi ni Xiana habang hindi maalis ang ngiti sa labi nito.

Napasapo ako sa noo ko. Parang gusto ko tuloy puntahan ngayon si Denise at tadyakan. Kung ano-anong tinuturo n’ya sa mga anak ko.

“Nandito na kayong dalawa, aalis na ’ko ha…” sabi ni Abi saka kinuha ang bag n’ya.

“Abi, usap tayo sa labas,” sabi ko saka hinawakan ang kamay n’ya. “Xiana, Xevan… dito muna kayo sa Papa n’yo. Mag-uusap lang kami ng ninang Abi n’yo sa labas.”

Lumabas din kami agad ni Abi at nagtungo sa pool area.

“Abi, kumusta na si Archer?” tanong ko, bakas pa rin ang pag-aalala sa boses ko.

Abi sighed and gave me a faint smile. “He’s fine, don’t worry… pero hindi n’ya pa rin matanggap ang break up n’yo. Last time lang, nakipag-away siya kay Mom dahil nga nalaman n’ya ang nangyari.”

Napabuntonghininga ako at napahawak sa laylayan ng damit ko. Sabi na nga ba at mangyayari ’yon.

“Wala kang kasalanan, bitch. Sadyang gano’n talaga si Mom. Ayoko na ring ipilit ang sa inyo ni kuya dahil magugulo lang ang mga buhay n’yo pareho. Siguro hindi lang talaga kayo para sa isa’t isa,” sabi ni Abi at napabuntonghininga saka hinawakan ang kamay ko.

“S-Sorry, Abi… You know I love your brother, right? I really love him, but my children are the ones who will suffer if we continued our relationship… You know too that I love my children more than anything,” I said and smiled faintly.

“I know, Kiara, and I understand. You don’t have to be sorry. Just focus on your kids and if possible, try to look deep inside your heart. I guess there’s someone that you really love more than you love my brother… I can see it anyway, Kiara. Kahit noon pa, masyado ko lang ipinipilit ang sa inyo ni kuya dahil gusto kita maging sister-in-law,” natatawang sabi n’ya.

Napakunot ang noo ko. Napangiti na lang si Abi at yumakap saka nagpaalam na bago umalis.

Siguro mas makakabuti na rin para sa amin ni Archer ang h’wag na lang muna mag-usap. Darating naman siguro ang araw na magiging komportable ulit kami sa isa’t isa… kapag naka-move on na kaming pareho sa mga nararamdaman namin.

“Papa, na-miss ko po ang mga luto n’yo,” nakangusong sabi ni Xiana habang nakaupo sa kandungan ng Papa n’ya.

“Me too,” segunda ni Xevan na nakaupo sa sahig habang nakayakap sa binti ni Xanthos.

Napangiti na lang ako habang tahimik na nakaupo at nakatitig sa kanila. Mas lumalabas ang kulit ng kambal kapag si Xanthos ang kasama nila. Pakiramdam ko ay kaya kong umupo lang dito maghapon at panoorin silang tatlo.

“What do you want me to cook?” Xanthos asked and pinched Xiana’s nose gently.

“I want to try your menudo, Papa. Hindi ko pa po natitikman ’yung luto n’yong menudo,” nakangusong sabi ni Xiana.

Natigilan si Xanthos at napaubo. Pasimple siyang tumingin sa ’kin. Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya at napakamot sa leeg ko.

“Okay, I’ll cook it for you if that’s what you want,” Xanthos said and rumpled Xiana’s hair gently.

Nagtungo na sina Xanthos sa kusina para magluto. Nakasunod naman ang mga anak namin sa kanya at mukhang balak na namang guluhin siya sa ginagawa.

Nagtungo na lang din ako sa kusina para panoorin sila. Hindi ko alam kung bakit sobrang nakukuntento na ’kong panoorin ang kulitan nilang tatlo… Ang cute lang kasi talaga nilang tingnan.

Naghain na si Xanthos pagkatapos n’yang magluto. Nitong mga nakaraang araw ko nakita na asikasong asikaso n’ya lagi ang kambal. Hindi ko talaga maiwasang isipin na swerte pa rin ako at siya ang tatay ng mga anak ko.

“Here’s yours, please don’t spill it again just like before,” Xanthos murmured when he sat beside me.

“W-Why do you keep on reminding me that?!” naiinis na sabi ko at hinampas ang braso n’ya.

Xanthos just laughed and started eating. I just rolled my eyes at him and started eating too… His menudo still tastes like before. Pakiramdam ko ito pa rin ang pinakamasarap na menudong natikman ko.

“Wow, Papa! It tastes so good. This is my favorite na!” tuwang tuwa na sabi ni Xiana.

Napangiti si Xanthos habang nakatitig sa mga bata na ganado kumain.

“Kanina ka pa titig nang titig sa ’kin.” Xanthos looked at me. “You make me wanna bite you,” he said and gave me a teasing smile.

I gasped and covered his face with both of my hands. Xanthos chuckled and removed my hands on his face. Akmang babawiin ko na ang kamay ko mula sa kanya pero hinawakan n’ya lang nang mahigpit ang mga ’yon nang isang kamay n’ya lang… pero hindi naman gano’ng kahigpit na tipong nakakasakit.

“X-Xanthos… my hands,” I mumbled while trying to avoid his gaze.

“You’ve been staring at me as if you wanna be kissed again… You don’t play fair, why keep teasing me like that?” he mumbled while still staring at me.

I gasped when he suddenly pulled my chair closer to him. He finally let go of my hands but he cornered me with his arms… Todo iwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya. Pakiramdam ko nag-iinit ang mukha ko sa hindi ko malamang dahilan.

“OMG! Ang sweet n’yo po! Ibig sabihin po ba dito na tayo titira kasi love na ni Mama at Papa ang isa’t isa?”

Natigilan naman kaming pareho ni Xanthos at napalingon kay Xiana. Agad akong napailing at bahagyang tinulak si Xanthos palayo.

“N-No, it’s not the case, Xiana…” I said and tried to push Xanthos again but he just pull me closer to him.

“Kiara…”

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Ang kaninang nang-aasar na mukha nito ay naging seryoso.

“Why don’t you consider it?” he asked in a soft voice. “I promise I won’t touch you without your permission or do something that you won’t like… I won’t hurt you and I will be good to you.” He gulped, he seems nervous. “Why don’t you just… stay here with me? I’m just… I’m just so done with the cold nights, I’m so tired of sleeping alone… You don’t have to sleep beside me, you don’t have to always talk to me, you’ll have the liberty to do whatever you want… Just stay here with Xiana and Xevan. That’s all I ask for,” bulong n’ya habang hindi maalis ang seryosong titig sa ’kin.

Natahimik ako habang nakikipaglabanan ng titig sa kanya. Napahawak ako nang mahigpit sa laylayan ng dress ko. Napalunok ako at pinakatitigan nang maigi ang mga mata n’ya.

Napatingin ako sa kambal. Nagsusumamo ang mga mata nila na tila ba sinasabi nila na dito na lang kami tumira kasama si Xanthos.

Muli akong napatingin kay Xanthos. Napalunok ako at napatango… pakiramdam ko kusang gumalaw ang katawan ko at ang labi ko.

“S-Sige, dito na lang ulit kami titira.”

Agad na napatayo sina Xiana at Xevan at nagsisigaw sa tuwa. Napangiti naman si Xanthos at tila nakahinga nang maluwag sa naging sagot ko.

“H-Hindi ako pumayag para sa ’yo, pumayag ako na dito ulit dahil sa kambal,” bulong ko saka napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya.

Natigilan ako nang marahang hinawakan ni Xanthos ang baba ko at pinaharap ako sa kanya. Ang ganda ng ngiti sa labi n’ya ngayon.

“Of course, baby. It’s for Xiana and Xevan. I know, but I’m still delighted,” he said and took my hand and gently kissed it while staring at me.

My heart beats faster and my face instantly reddened. I immediately took my hand away from him.

“Y-You said you won’t touch me without permission,” I said while stuttering.

Xanthos chuckled. “Oh, sorry. I did it unconsciously… I won’t do it again,” he said and slightly distanced himself from me.

“S-Siguraduhin mo lang,” nauutal na sabi ko na lang saka napaismid.

Tamang desisyon ba ’to? Nitong mga nakaraang araw napapansin ko na parang nagiging padalos-dalos ako sa pagdedesisyon.

“Mareng Kiara, sana h’wag ka ng bumalik sa unit ko at dito ka na lang talaga forever,” nakangiting sabi ni Denise matapos n’yang dalhin ang mga gamit ko mula sa unit n’ya.

Mukhang tuwang tuwa na naman ang bruhang ’to.

“H’wag kang mag-isip ng kung ano-ano diyan. Pinagbigyan ko lang ang gusto ng kambal,” sabi ko na lang at kumagat sa French fries na iniluto ni Xanthos kanina.

“Ay weh? Ang tagal ka ng pinipilit ng kambal na tumira kayo rito, bakit ngayon ka lang pumayag?” nakangising tanong ni Denise.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos na nakikipaglaro sa kambal sa living room. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko at muling napatingin kay Abi.

“Kung ano-ano namang iniisip mo… Sadyang hindi na kami mga bata, saka na-realize ko na hindi naman masamang pagbigyan ko ’yung kambal sa ganitong bagay dahil sila rin ang nahihirapan sa palipat-lipat kada linggo,” sabi ko na lang saka muling kumain ng fries.

“Ay sus, sige na, oo na,” sabi na lang ni Denise. “Dahil sa kambal daw, lol,” narinig kong bulong ni Denise. Tiningnan ko naman siya nang masama.

Umalis din agad si Denise dahil may kailangan pa raw siyang gawin. Pagsapit ng gabi, inasikaso ko na ang kambal para sa pagtulog nila. Akmang tatabi ako sa kanila pero agad nila akong pinigilan.

“Mama, dapat po magkatabi ang Mama at Papa,” napapahikab na sabi ni Xiana. Napakunot ang noo ko.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Dapat po kayong dalawa ni Papa ang share sa room,” dagdag pa ni Xiana.

Nagkatinginan kami ni Xanthos na nakatayo at nakasandal sa pinto. Wala na kaming nagawa kundi ang lumabas ng kwarto dahil pinagpipilitan nila na dapat kaming mag-share sa kwarto ni Xanthos.

“Don’t worry, I’ll just sleep on the couch if you’re not comfortable,” sabi ni Xanthos at kumuha ng isang unan. Akmang aalis na siya ngunit agad ko siyang tinawag.

“X-Xanthos!”

Napalingon siya sa ’kin. “Hmm?”

“W-We can just… sleep here together. The bed is big anyway,” I murmured while trying to avoid his gaze.

Napatitig sa ’kin si Xanthos. Hindi ko mabasa ang iniisip n’ya ngayon.

“Teasing me should have limitation too, Kiara,” sabi ni Xanthos at lumapit saka umupo sa kama.

“I-I’m not teasing you! Nagmamagandang loob lang ako,” nakakunot-noong sabi ko.

Natawa si Xanthos sa naging reaksyon ko at bahagyang ginulo ang buhok ko.

Tahimik na humiga na kaming pareho. Medyo malaki-laki naman ang espasyo sa pagitan naming dalawa kaya sa tingin ko magiging okay lang ang lahat.

Natigilan ako nang tumunog ang phone ko sa bedside table. Kinuha ko ’yon at binasa ang text… Natigilan ako nang makitang mula kay Archer iyon.

Kiara, please let’s talk. Even for the last time. Please, Kiara.

I bit my lower lip when I read his text. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang dapat kong gawin. Napabuntonghininga ako nang magsend ng address si Archer. Napakagat na lang ako sa kuko ko.

“Who’s that?” Xanthos asked, he’s staring at the ceiling.

“A-Archer,” I answered in a soft voice.

I sighed and stood up. Maybe I should really talk to him one last time. Hindi maayos ang huli naming pag-uusap, siguro nga ay kailangan muna namin ng closure para wala kaming samaan ng loob pareho.

Nagtungo ako sa pinto ng kwarto at akmang bubuksan ’yon ngunit natigilan na lang ako nang agad na humarang ang kamay ni Xanthos do’n.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he murmured to my ear.

My whole body shivered because of some unknown reason. I turned my back on the door and faced Xanthos… Seryoso siyang nakatingin sa mga mata ko ngayon.

“I-I’ll talk to him one last time, it’s just for closure. I think we both need it,” I said and avoided his gaze.

Xanthos held my chin and made me face him. He sighed and gently caressed my cheek.

“Do you want to see him?” he asked in a low tone while staring at me.

Hindi ako nakasagot. Nanatili akong nakatitig sa mga mata n’ya at pilit na inaalam ang iniisip n’ya ngayon. Napatitig ako sa mga mata n’ya. Sa hindi malamang dahilan, pakiramdam ko nagsusumamo ang mga mata n’ya na h’wag na ’kong tumuloy at manatili na lang dito.

Pakiramdam ko kusang gumalaw ang kamay ko upang hawakan ang kamay n’ya na nakahawak sa pisngi ko. Napalunok ako habang nakatitig pa rin sa kanya.

“S-Siguro… hindi na lang ako aalis.”

Chapter Thirty-Five

“Xanthos, hindi na nga ako aalis,” sabi ko habang nakatitig sa kanya.

Xanthos just hugged me tighter and kissed my forehead. I bit my lower lip and slapped his chest.

“Wala kang tinutupad sa mga sinabi mo,” nakasimangot na sabi ko habang nakatingin pa rin sa kanya.

“I can’t stop hugging you. I can’t sleep without hugging you like this. I helped you last time when you were cold, help me too. Hmm?” he said and pulled me closer to him.

Napaismid na lang ako at gumanti ng yakap sa kanya. Nakita kong napangiti siya sa ginawa ko. Isinubsob ko na lang ang mukha ko sa leeg n’ya at pasimple siyang inamoy. Hindi pa rin talaga nagbabago ang natural n’yang amoy.

Tumunghay ako at muling tumingin sa mukha ni Xanthos. Napatingin din naman siya sa ’kin.

“Hmm?” tanong n’ya saka sinimulang haplusin ang buhok ko.

Napailing na lang ako at tumitig na lang sa kanya dahil wala naman talaga akong sasabihin. Gusto ko lang talaga siyang titigan.

Nakipaglabanan na lang siya ng titig sa ’kin. Iniyakap n’ya ang braso sa baywang ko habang nakatitig sa ’kin. Pakiramdam ko matatalo ako dahil sa intensidad ng titig n’ya sa ’kin.

“I told you, stop staring at me as if you want to be kissed again,” he muttered and gently caressed my cheek.

I bit my lower lip and help his hand on my cheek. Napapikit na lang ako nang dinampian n’ya nang magaan na halik ang labi ko. Tila nadidismayang napatingin ako sa kanya nang agad din n’yang inilayo ang mukha n’ya sa ’kin.

“Hey, I said stop looking at me like that,” Xanthos said and pinched my nose.

Napakapit ako nang mahigpit sa damit n’ya habang nakatitig pa rin sa kanya. Tila napigtad ang pagtitimpi n’ya at tuluyang siniil nang malalim na halik ang labi ko.

Agad kong tinugon ang halik n’ya. Napayakap na lang ako sa batok n’ya nang tuluyan siyang pumaibabaw sa akin habang patuloy akong hinahalikan.

I don’t know what pushed me to do this. I just found myself wanting to tease him, wanting to be kissed by him again, as if my body is craving for it for a long time… or maybe I really am.

Xanthos’ tongue explored the insides of my mouth. I just found myself moving my tongue against his while arching my body to give him more access. Xanthos’ hand went down to my stomach. I gasped for air when he suddenly put his hand inside my shirt and touched my bare stomach.

We were both panting when he finally distanced his lips from mine. He stared at me for a moment but he immediately planted small kisses all over my face, especially at my lips. The sound that his little kisses makes is making my body shiver with sensation. I just opened my eyes slowly and looked at him with drunk-like eyes. He stared at me and gently caressed my lips with his thumb.

“I told you to stop teasing me,” he mumbled and gave me a soft kiss on the lips again.

Hindi ko na naalala kung gaano katagal kaming naghalikan. I just fell asleep while hugging him… I just fell asleep with swollen lips.

WALA KAMING naging problema ni Xanthos ng mga nakalipas na araw. May mga pagkakataon na kailangan n’yang umalis at pumasok sa kompanya, pero gumagawa siya ng paraan para magkaroon ng time para sa mga bata. Minsan nga ay naaawa ako sa kanya dahil nakikita ko kung gaano siya kapagod pagkagaling sa trabaho.

“Xanthos, wala ng masyadong laman ’yung ref,” sabi ko habang nakatingin sa laman ng ref.

“Is that so?” Napatigil si Xanthos sa pagtitipa sa laptop n’ya at napatingin sa ’kin. “I’ll go out to buy groceries.”

Natigilan kami nang biglang lumapit sa ’min si Denise. Hinawakan ni Denise ang braso ko at hinila ako palapit kay Xanthos.

“Kayong dalawa ang mag-grocery. Suportahan n’yo ang isa’t isa, mga mare. Lumabas-labas naman kayo. Ako na ang bahala magbantay rito sa kambal. Sige na, lumabas kayo, mag-date o kung ano man,” sabi ni Denise habang bahagya pa ’kong tinutulak palapit kay Xanthos.

“Ano ba’ng pinagsasasabi mo?” nakakunot-noong tanong ko na lang saka pinitik ang noo n’ya.

“H’wag ka ng pabebe, mareng Kiara. Sige na, kayong dalawa ang mag-grocery. Isama mo siya, Sir Xanthos. Tingnan mo naman, ang putla na ni Kiara dahil hindi na nakakalabas,” sabi ni Denise at itinuro pa ako.

Napatitig sa ’kin si Xanthos. Napataas na lang ang kilay ko dahil titig na titig siya sa ’kin na tila ba tinitingnan n’ya kung maputla talaga ako. Gusto ko tuloy matawa. Naniniwala talaga siya sa mga kalokohan ni Denise?

“Do you want to come with me, Kiara?” tanong ni Xanthos.

Bahagyang siniko ni Denise ang tagiliran ko. “H’wag ka ng mag-inarte, mare. Hindi na kayo mga bata kaya maglandian na kayong dalawa at magparami,” bulong ni Denise. Tiningnan ko na lang siya nang masama saka hinampas ang braso n’ya.

“Oo raw, Sir. Gustong gusto sumama ni Kiara,” sabi ni Denise. “Hintayin mo siya rito, Sir. Magbibihis lang siya… Halika na, mare,” sabi ni Denise at basta na lang ako hinila papunta sa kwarto namin ni Xanthos.

Napakamot na lang ako sa batok ko habang ipinipili n’ya ’ko ng damit sa closet.

“Nako, nai-i-stress ako sa inyong dalawa ni Sir. Kailan ba kayo kikilos nang kusa? Bakit kailangan ko gumawa ng way para sa inyong dalawa? Hay nako, hirap na hirap na ’ko maging president ng fans club n’yo ha,” panenermon ni Denise saka lumapit sa ’kin at inabutan ako ng damit.

“Bakit kailangang ito pa ang isuot ko?” tanong ko at inangat ang dress na pinili n’ya para sa ’kin.

“Siyempre, date ’yon kaya kailangan maganda ka. I know naman na lagi kang maganda, pero need mo maging maganda lalo. Okay?” sabi n’ya na lang.

Napaismid ako. “Hindi naman kasi ’yon date. Grocery lang ang habol namin kaya kami lalabas,” nakapamaywang na sabi ko.

“Basta, hindi ’yan. Magbihis ka na mare at baka mainip si Sir Xanthos sa labas,” sabi ni Denise at agad din akong iniwan para makapagbihis.

Napailing na lang ako at sinuot na lang din ang dress na binigay ni Denise. Naglagay lang ako nang simpleng make up at hinayaang nakabagsak ang buhok ko bago ako lumabas ng kwarto.

Naabutan ko si Denise na panay ang bulong kay Xanthos paglabas ko. Agad na napataas ang kilay ko. Hindi maganda ang kutob ko sa mga pinagsasasabi ng babaeng ’yon kay Xanthos.

“Oh siya, sige na. Umalis na kayong dalawa. H’wag kayong mag-alala sa kambal dahil ako ang bahala sa kanila,” pagtataboy sa ’min ni Denise.

Pagkatapos naming magpaalam sa kambal, umalis na rin kami agad ni Xanthos. Tahimik lang kaming pareho sa kotse. Napapaisip ako sa sarili ko kung bakit nasasakyan ko ang trip ni Denise sa buhay.

Napailing na lang ako at napahilot sa sentido ko.

Agad akong pinagbuksan ng kotse ni Xanthos pagdating namin sa mall. Nginitian ko na lang siya saka agad na bumaba ng kotse.

“Kiara…”

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos na seryosong nakatingin sa ’kin.

“Hmm? Bakit?” tanong ko saka napahawak sa braso ko.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit bigla na lang akong nailang. Dapat talaga mas simpleng damit na lang ang sinuot ko. Grocery lang naman ang ipinunta namin dito… Kasalanan talaga ’to ni Denise.

“Can I hold your hand?” tanong n’ya.

Pakiramdam ko nasamid ako sa sarili kong laway dahil sa tanong n’ya. Tinitigan ko pa siya lalo para alamin kung seryoso ba siya o nagbibiro lang… Mukhang seryoso siya.

“W-Why do you have to hold my hand?” I asked and cleared the lump in my throat.

“I want to. You can say no if you don’t want me to hold your hand,” he said and smiled at me.

I bit my lower lip while staring at him. How can I say no when he’s giving me a smile like that? Is he doing this on purpose?

“I don’t know why do you want to hold my hand… b-but I don’t mind,” I murmured and avoided his gaze.

Natigilan na lang ako nang maramdaman kong hinawakan n’ya na ang kamay ko. I looked at him when he intertwined our fingers. He bit his lower lip as if he’s suppressing himself from smiling.

Hindi na lang ako nagsalita nang maglakad na kami papasok sa mall. Pilit kong pinapakalma ang sarili ko para hindi n’ya mahalata na nanlalamig ang mga kamay ko.

“Look at him, ’yung maraming tattoos, ang gwapo n’ya, ’no?”

Napakunot ang noo ko nang mapansing may mga babaeng nagbubulungan malapit sa ’min. Nakatingin sila kay Xanthos ngayon. Napatingin ako sa hitsura ni Xanthos. He’s just wearing a casual clothes, pants and plain white T-shirt so the the tattoos on his arms are visible. It makes him more handsome and appealing.

My forehead creased. I glared at those girls. Napatigil naman sila sa pagbubulungan nang mapansing tumingin ako at agad na lumayo.

The fact that Xanthos is so handsome and attractive despite of his age is kinda irritating for some unknown reason.

“Ahm, Kiara…”

I tried to calm myself when Xanthos called me… Why am I even pissed off?

“Why?” I asked and looked at him.

Natigilan ako nang may ipakitang ticket sa ’kin si Xanthos. He cleared his throat and scratched his thick eyebrow.

“Denise gave these to me. Maybe we should… watch a movie first,” he said and avoided my gaze.

I blinked and gulped as my heart beats faster than usual. I bit my lower lip and held his hand tighter. He looked at me when I did that.

“I-It would be a waste if we won’t watch that movie,” I said and scratched my nape.

Napangiti si Xanthos sa sinabi ko. Natagpuan ko na lang ang sarili ko na nasa loob ng sinehan at katabi si Xanthos, buti na lang at kaunti na lang ang nanonood ng movie dahil last week na nito sa sinehan. Tragic romance daw ang movie na papanoorin namin. Buti na lang at hindi horror dahil naalala ko na takot si Xanthos sa mga gano’ng movie.

Habang tumatagal ang movie, mas lalo itong nagiging emosyonal. Napapatingin naman si Xanthos sa ’kin sa tuwing naririnig n’ya na napapahikbi ako.

Inabutan ako ng panyo ni Xanthos nang tuluyan na ’kong maiyak sa pinapanood namin. Naramdaman kong bahagya n’ya ’kong hinila palapit sa kanya at inakbayan ako.

“Hey, are you alright?” tila nag-aalalang tanong n’ya.

“W-Why did she have to die? He’s all alone now, t-this is so heartbreaking. I won’t watch something like this again,” naiiyak na sabi ko.

Naiiyak pa rin ako hanggang sa makalabas kami ng sinehan. Hinawakan ni Xanthos ang kamay ko at pinaharap ako sa kanya. Nakasimangot na napatitig na lang ako sa kanya. Marahan n’yang inangat ang mukha ko upang magtagpo ang mga mata naming dalawa.

Marahan n’yang pinunasan ng panyo ang pisngi ko at gilid ng mata ko. Hinayaan ko na lang siya saka kumapit sa t-shirt n’ya.

“Tingnan mo, ang sweet nila.”

“I want a boyfriend like him.”

Napansin kong may mga napapatingin sa ’min pero tila wala siyang pakialam do’n… Nasa akin lang ang atensyon n’ya.

“Why are you crying like this over a movie?” Xanthos asked softly and chuckled.

I glared at him. “And you were a scaredy cat over a horror movie,” ganting asar ko sa kanya.

“Hey, that was before. Hindi na ’ko takot ngayon,” natatawang sabi na lang n’ya.

Kumain muna kami sa isang restaurant bago namin tuluyang napagdesisyunan na mamili. Pakiramdam ko nga siya ang nanay sa ’ming dalawa dahil mas alam n’ya ang mga dapat na bilhin.

Nang matapos na kaming mamili, isinakay na namin sa kotse ang mga pinamili namin. Akmang sasakay na ako sa kotse nang mapansing pamilyar ang kotse na katabi ng sa amin ni Xanthos.

Bahagya akong napaatras nang bumukas ’yon. Natigilan ako nang makitang bumaba ng kotse si Archer. Maski si Xanthos ay halatang natigilan.

“Kiara…” sabi ni Archer habang nakatingin sa akin.

“W-What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Can we talk? Kahit saglit lang, please,” pakiusap n’ya habang nakatitig sa ’kin.

Napatingin ako kay Xanthos. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ko ginawa ’yon… Bakit tila nagpapaaalam ako sa kanya kung pwede kong kausapin si Archer.

Xanthos just gave me a small smile and nodded.

Napagdesisyunan ko na lang na sumama kay Archer. Nagtungo kami sa malapit na coffee shop at doon nag-usap.

“Kumusta ka na, Kiara?” tanong ni Archer saka ngumiti sa akin.

Napatungo ako at napahawak sa laylayan ng dress ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ako makatingin nang ayos sa kanya.

Hiwalay na kami pero pakiramdam ko nahuli n’ya ako na may kasamang iba… hindi komportable ang pakiramdam ko dahil siguro ilang linggo pa lang ang nakakalipas nang maghiwalay kami.

“Don’t worry, hindi kita pipilitin na makipagbalikan. Gusto ko lang humingi ng sorry sa mga nasabi ni Mom sa ’yo. I’m really sorry, Kiara,” hinging paumanhin n’ya.

Napatingin ako sa kanya. “You don’t have to say sorry. It’s not your fault,” I mumbled and smiled faintly at him.

Saglit kaming natahimik. Sa totoo lang sobrang naiilang ako sa mga oras na ’to. Ang mga gusto kong sabihin kay Archer noon ay ayaw ng lumabas sa bibig ko ngayon.

“I know you still love him, Kiara. Kahit noong tayo na, alam kong mahal mo pa rin siya… Alam kong iba ang pagmamahal mo para sa kanya,” sabi ni Archer saka tipid na ngumiti.

Pakiramdam ko may kung anong kumirot sa puso ko nang makita ang ngiti n’yang ’yon.

“I-It’s not like that, Archer. You know that I really loved you, right? I was sincere, I-I admit I kind of used you at first but I really developed feelings–” agad n’yang pinutol ang sasabihin ko.

“Don’t worry, I know, Kiara… I know you were sincere. I know that you loved me… but not the way that you did towards him. And that’s okay. I was lucky enough to be loved by you even for a short time. I’m more than thankful,” Archer said and smiled at me.

I bit my lower lip when my vision became blurry because of my tears. Agad namang tumayo si Archer at lumapit sa ’kin. Lumuhod siya at agad akong inabutan ng panyo.

“Hey, don’t cry… Baka isipin ni Xanthos, pinapaiyak kita,” sabi ni Archer saka bahagyang natawa.

“I’m sorry, Archer… I was so lucky too, I’m lucky to be loved by a good man like you even though I don’t deserve it,” I said while crying.

Archer smiled and gently wiped my tears with his thumb.

“Thank you for saying that. Thank you for everything, Kiara. I will never forget you, and I hope… when everything’s fine, I hope we can still be friends.” He stood up. “I’m sincerely wishing for your happiness. I hope you’ll be finally happy with him.”

Pakiramdam ko nabunutan ako ng tinik matapos ng naging pag-uusap namin ni Archer. Napagtanto ko kung gaano ako kaswerte na may nagmahal sa ’kin na katulad n’ya… alam n’ya ang totoong nararamdaman ko pero pinili n’ya pa rin ang mahalin ako.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing tahimik lang si Xanthos na nagmamaneho sa tabi ko. Hindi na lang din ako nagsalita hanggang sa makarating kami sa pad n’ya. Hindi ko alam kung bakit siya natahimik… may naging problema ba kami?

“Kiara, Cad is inviting me at his bar. I’ll go home before 12,” pagpapaalam sa ’kin ni Xanthos nang sumapit ang gabi.

Tumango na lang ako at hinayaan siyang umalis. Hindi ko alam kung bakit tila hindi ako mapakali dahil sa pagiging tahimik n’ya. Gusto kong malaman kung ano’ng problema, pero nahihiya akong magtanong sa kanya.

Malapit ng mag-12 pero hindi pa nauwi si Xanthos. Tumambay na lang ako sa living room para hintayin siya. Hindi rin kasi ako makatulog dahil sa kakaisip sa kanya. Dapat hindi na lang siya nagsabi ng oras para hindi ako nag-aalala.

“Mareng Kiara! Help!”

Napatayo ako nang marinig ang boses ni Cad. Agad akong lumapit sa kanya nang makitang akay akay n’ya si Xanthos na mukhang lasing na lasing.

“D-Dalhin natin siya sa kwarto,” sabi ko na lang at tinulungan siyang akayin si Xanthos.

“Bakit naman siya nagpakalasing nang ganyan?” tanong ko kay Cad nang maihiga na namin sa kama si Xanthos.

“Nako, secret na lang, lods. Sige, sibat na ’ko.” Akmang aalis si Cad pero napalingon siya sa akin. “Ingat ka, mare. Nagiging honest si Xanthos kapag lasing,” nakangising sabi ni Cad bago tuluyang umalis.

Napailing na lang ako at inasikaso na si Xanthos. Pinunasan ko na lang siya matapos kong hubarin ang sapatos n’ya.

Akmang tatayo na ako ngunit agad na nahawakan ni Xanthos ang kamay ko. Natigilan ako nang bumangon siya habang malamlam ang mga mata na nakatitig sa ’kin.

“X-Xanthos?”

Natigilan ako nang marahan n’ya akong hinila para yakapin. Hindi naman agad ako nakakilos sa ginawa n’ya.

“Ikaw ba si Kiara? S-Si Kiara North?” bulong n’ya habang nakayakap sa ’kin.

Bahagyang ngumiti ako at tumango. “Oo, ako si Kiara North.”

Hindi agad siya nakapagsalita. Naramdaman ko lang ang mabibigat n’yang paghinga sa leeg ko.

“If you’re Kiara North… then you must be the woman I love the most.”

Pakiramdam ko natulos ako sa pwesto ko ngayon nang marinig ko ang sinabi n’ya. Bumigat ang paghinga ko at tila nanghihinang napakapit sa damit n’ya.

“W-What did you say?” I asked.

Is he saying the truth? But Cad said… Cad said that he’s honest when he’s drunk.

“I-I will try to forgive your father. I will try to forget everything they did. I will even release him from that prison if you want me to… I will be a better man, I will be a better version of myself yesterday, I will be better everyday. I will always be good to you… Just please, stop loving him. Don’t love him anymore… Just love me instead. P-Please,” he muttered and hugged me tighter.

“X-Xanthos,” I mumbled and gripped his shirt tighter.

Ang lakas ng kabog ng puso ko na tila nabibingi na ako dahil do’n. Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili ko kung bakit tila naluluha ako dahil sa mga sinabi n’ya.

“I-I love you so much, Kiara North… Mahal na mahal talaga kita, sobrang mahal na mahal kita.”

Chapter Thirty-Six

Nagising ako na wala si Xanthos sa tabi ko. Agad akong lumabas ng kwarto namin at dumiretso sa kusina pero wala siya ro’n… Pumasok ba siya sa trabaho? Okay na ba siya? Lasing na lasing siya kagabi.

Natigilan ako nang mapansing may pagkaing nakatakip sa mesa. May sticky note rin na nakadikit do’n. Agad ko ’yong kinuha at binasa.

Denise will be there later. I already cooked breakfast for you and the kids. I will be in a business trip for a week.

Naiinis na nilukot ko ang sticky note pagkabasa ko no’n. Bakit ngayon pa siya pupunta ng business trip? Bakit kung kailan pa umamin siya ng nararamdaman n’ya kagabi?

Sinubukan kong i-text si Xanthos para itanong kung nasaan siya pero nakalipas na ang ilang oras, hindi pa rin siya nagre-reply.

Napailing na lang ako at pinakain ang kambal pagkagising nila. Hindi rin ako naghintay nang matagal at agad na dumating si Denise kasama si Cad.

“Denise, saan ang business trip ni Xanthos?” tanong ko.

Napakunot ang noo n’ya. “Wala namang scheduled business trip si Sie Xanthos.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. “But… he said he’s going on a business trip.”

Her forehead creased. “Ha? Lahat ng schedule n’ya, alam ko at wala naman sa schedule n’ya ang business–” hindi naituloy ni Denise ang sasabihin nang takpan ni Cad ang bibig n’ya.

“Hindi lahat ng schedule ni pareng Xanthos, alam mo. May business trip siya na hindi mo alam, okay ba?” mariing tanong ni Cad saka pinitik ang noo ni Denise.

I glared at Cad. He just cleared his throat and avoided my gaze. I stood up and walk to his direction. I grabbed his collar and pulled him closer to me.

“What the hell is wrong with Xanthos? Where the fuck is he?” I asked and grabbed his collar tighter.

Napabuga ng hangin si Cadence at napakamot sa ulo n’ya. “He’s currently contemplating right now, mare. Let’s give him some time alone,” sabi na lang ni Cad saka alanganing ngumiti sa ’kin.

My forehead furrowed. “What is he contemplating for?”

“Kaya nga kasi naglasing ’yon kagabi kasi nagseselos kay Archer. Akala n’ya magbabalikan na kayong dalawa ni Archer. Nagpapakalayo layo muna siya para kontrolin ’yung sarili n’ya na maging selfish pagdating sa ’yo… Ayaw n’ya na kontrolin ka at natatakot siya na masakal ka sa magiging setup n’yo kaya nagpapakalayo layo muna siya. Hindi mo maiintindihan kahit i-explain ko sa ’yo. Kahit ako ginagawa ko ’yon kapag masyado akong nagiging possessive kay Liah dahil hindi healthy sa relasyon ’yon,” paliwanag ni Cad.

Natahimik ako at napabitiw sa kanya. Nagtatakang napatingin na lang sa ’min si Denise na tila hindi n’ya naiintindihan ang nangyayari.

“Mahirap lalo sa kanya dahil wala pa naman kayong label. Ilang taon ding nagkontrol ng sarili si pareng Xanthos tapos ngayong magkasama ulit kayo, nati-trigger ’yung possessive side n’ya.” Natawa si Cad. “Siguro nasa isip n’ya, hindi pa nga siya naamin sa ’yo na mahal ka n’ya tapos–”

“Bakit n’ya pa sinabi sa ’kin kagabi na mahal n’ya ’ko kung bigla rin naman siyang mawawala paggising ko?” tila wala sa sariling nasabi ko na lang saka napabuntong hininga.

“Oo nga, e. Bakit pa n’ya sinabi sa ’yo kagabi na mahal ka n’ya kung bigla rin–teka ano?!” gulat na tanong ni Cad.

Maski si Denise ay napasinghap sa sinabi ko at agad na lumapit sa ’kin.

“OMG, Kiara. Legit ba ’yan?!” excited na tanong ni Denise saka kumapit sa braso ko.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko saka tumango. “S-Sinabi n’ya sa ’kin kagabi na mahal na mahal n’ya ’ko… Sa tingin n’yo totoo ’yon? Lasing siya kagabi tapos… bigla naman siyang nawala ngayon. Baka hindi n’ya lang talaga sinasadya na sabihin ’yon,” sabi ko at muling umupo sa couch.

“Lah, gaga ka? Tumataob ang pagiging in denial ni Xanthos kapag lasing. Lagpas dalawang dekada ko ng kaibigan ’yon kaya alam ko. Kaya nga namin nalaman nina Zak na mahal ka n’ya five years ago pa, e. Nalasing siya no’n tapos halos pinagsigawan sa bar ko na mahal ka n’ya. Nakakahiyang moment talaga ’yon, tangina,” napapailing na sabi ni Cad.

“OMG talaga teh, akala ko forever ng hindi kikilos si Sir. Hay, sana man lang nakita ko ang confession moment ni Sir Xanthos. Deserve ko ’yon bilang number one supporter n’yo since day one,” paghihimutok ni Denise.

Napabuntonghininga na lang ako at napayakap sa sarili ko… Kung gano’n, ibig sabihin totoong mahal ako ni Xanthos at matagal na n’ya ’kong mahal. Kung alam ko lang…

Napailing na lang ako. Bakit ko ba iniisip ’yon? Balewala ang pag-amin n’ya kung hindi n’ya naman ako haharapin. Saka isa pa, lasing siya noong umamin siya. Posibleng nakalimutan na n’ya ang tungkol do’n.

Wala naman akong lakas ng loob na ipaalala sa kanya ’yon kung sakali… saka bakit ko naman ipapaalala? Hindi pa naman ako nahihibang para gawin ’yon.

Hindi ko na lang hinayaan ang sarili ko na magmukmok. Napagdesisyunan kong magpunta sa mall para mamili kasama ang kambal. Ngayon na lang ulit ako nakalabas kasama sila. Bibilhan ko na lang sila ng mga gusto nila at hahayaan silang maglaro sa arcade.

“Mama, saan po nagpunta si Papa?” tanong ni Xiana habang nakain ng ice cream.

“May inasikaso lang ang Papa n’yo, uuwi rin siya… Bakit? Nami-miss n’yo na ba siya?” tanong ko saka pinunasan ang labi n’ya na medyo makalat na dahil sa ice cream.

Napanguso si Xiana. “Opo, Mama… Kailan po tayo makakalabas together as a family?”

Natigilan ako sa tanong n’ya. Hindi ko siya masagot dahil hindi ko alam kung kailan mangyayari ’yon.

Nagtungo na kami sa department store pagkatapos nilang kumain ng ice cream. Ibibili ko sila ng mga bagong damit. Medyo lumiliit na sa kanila ang mga damit nila.

“Mama, pwede po ba maghiwalay na kami ng room ni Kuya Xevan? Gusto ko po ng princess theme na room, ayaw po ni Xevan ng gano’n,” sabi ni Xiana habang nakahawak sa kamay ko.

“Sige, sasabihin natin sa Papa mo. May isa pa namang extra room sa tabi ng room n’yo ni Xevan,” sabi ko saka bahagyang kinurot ang pisngi n’ya.

“Mama, I want a batman theme room,” sabi naman ni Xevan saka yumakap sa hita ko.

“Okay, sasabihin natin sa Papa n’yo ’yan,” sabi ko na lang.

Natigilan ako nang mapatingin sa home appliances section. Napatigil ako sa pamimili ng damit ng kambal nang makita si Mom na nakatingin sa direksyon ko. Kagaya ko, bakas din ang pagkagulat sa mukha n’ya.

“Mama, is there a problem po?” tanong ni Xiana saka yumakap din sa hita ko.

Napatingin si Mom sa mga anak ko na nakayakap sa magkabilang hita ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi agad ako nakakilos nang maglakad siya papalapit sa ’kin. Nanatili akong nakatitig sa kanya. Nararamdaman ko rin na nanlalamig ang mga kamay ko ngayon.

“Kiara… is that you, sweetie?” she asked and gave me a faint smile.

Akira North… No, Akira Montreal is still beautiful as ever. Her age really didn’t do justice to her beauty. I just sighed and avoided her gaze. This is so awkward. I never expect to see her again like this… Hindi pa naman naging maganda ang huling pagkikita namin noon.

“Sila na ba ang mga anak mo?” tanong n’ya habang hindi maalis ang tingin sa kambal.

Hindi ako nagsalita at tumango na lang. Hindi ko alam kung paano siya tatratuhin o pakikisamahan ngayon matapos ang mga nangyari… Sinabi n’ya na hindi siya ang tunay na nanay ko, wala naman sigurong dahilan para pakisamahan ko siya nang ayos… pero dahil siya pa rin ang kinilala kong nanay, hindi ko magawang mainis o magalit sa kanya.

Natagpuan ko na lang ang sarili ko na nasa isang restaurant kasama siya. Ang kambal naman ay nagkukwentuhan lang sa tabi ko habang nakain.

“Kiara, I thought I’ll never get to see you again,” Akira said and smiled at me.

“What do you want to say? Please go straight to the point, Akira,” I said while staring at her.

There’s no point in calling her ‘Mom’ anyway. Maglolokohan na lang kami kung gano’n.

Akira sighed and held my hand on top of the table. “I missed you, Kiara. I missed my daughter.”

Tuluyan ng natunaw ang depensa ko sa sinabi n’ya. Napaiwas ako ng tingin sa kanya kasabay ng panlalabo ng paningin ko dahil sa mga luha.

“Kung meron man akong pinagsisisihan, ’yon ay ang pinili kong sabihin sa ’yo na hindi ako ang tunay mong ina… Kahit na matagal kong tinatak sa isip ko na hindi kita anak, a-alam ko sa sarili ko na napamahal na ’ko sa ’yo… Hindi mo alam kung gaano ako kasaya na makita ka ulit ngayon, ikaw at ang mga anak mo,” sabi n’ya saka napatingin sa kambal na abala sa pagkain.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko at napaiwas ng tingin sa kanya. Isa si Mom sa noon ko pa talaga gustong makausap. Marami akong gustong itanong at gustong malaman sa kanya pero heto na siya ngayon, kusa na n’yang sinasagot ang mga tanong sa isip ko.

“Y-Yung tunay kong ina, nasaan siya?” tanong ko habang nakatungo pa rin.

“Matagal ng patay si Paula, Kiara. She died after she gave birth to you. Inako ko na ang responsibilidad ng pagiging ina mo ng mga oras na ’yon. I honestly hated you at first, I asked myself why I have to take care of someone’s child. I hated you for being alive… but I learned to love you as time passes by and I just couldn’t accept it to myself… I’m really sorry, Kiara. I’m so sorry.” Akira gave me a faint smile and caressed my hand. “You don’t have to forgive me, I just want to apologize for everything… I just want to apologize to my only daugher.”

I bit my lower lip when tears finally streamed down to my cheeks. I held Mom’s hand too and looked at her.

“I-I’m sorry too, I’m sorry for taking your freedom from you. Whatever your intention is, you’d been a good and responsible mother to me even though I’m not your real daughter. I still should be thankful for that,” I mumbled while my tears are falling continuously.

Namula na rin ang mga mata n’ya at tuluyang naluha. Nagtatakang napatingin sa ’min ang kambal. Natigilan ako nang maramdaman kong pinunasan ni Xiana ang luha ko. Napangiti na lang ako sa ginawa n’ya.

“Mama, why are you crying?” tila naluluha na ring tanong ni Xiana saka yumakap sa akin.

Si Xevan naman ay tumayo at lumapit kay Mom. Umupo siya sa tabi nito at pinahid din ang mga luha nito. Natigilan naman si Mom sa ginawa n’ya.

“Thank you,” Mom mumbled and hugged my son… her grandson.

Pakiramdam ko muli akong nabunutan ng tinik matapos ang naging pag-uusap namin ni Mom. Ang sarap sa pakiramdam na wala ng sama ng loob. Kahit pa anong nangyari sa amin noon, itinuring ko pa rin siyang tunay na ina at kahit ano pa ang mga sinabi n’ya noon, mas lamang ang naramdaman kong sinseridad mula sa kanya sa mga nagdaang taon na pag-aalaga sa ’kin. Alam kong itinuring n’ya kong anak sa kabila ng inis na naramdaman n’ya sa ’kin.

“Mama, is she really our Lola?” Xiana asked when we finally got home.

“Yes, baby. Lola n’yo siya ni Xevan,” nakangiting sabi ko habang pinagluluto sila ng hapunan.

Mom and I exchanged numbers. Hindi siya nangako na palagi siyang dadalaw pero gagawa raw siya ng paraan para madalaw ang kambal paminsan minsan. Si Mom na lang ang mag-isang nagha-handle ng Montreal Corp. kaya palagi siyang busy.

Nang sumapit na ang gabi, tumambay na lang ako sa pool area na palaging tinatambayan ni Xanthos. Dito siya madalas tumingin sa langit habang puno ng lungkot ang mukha n’ya… Xanthos had been through a lot. I can’t say that everything he did in his life was right but he’s a strong man. I won’t be able to survive if I experienced the same thing as his… I suddenly miss him… I miss Xanthos already.

Kailan ba siya uuwi? Bakit kailangan n’ya pang idistansya ang sarili sa ’kin?

“Mareng Kiara, bakit hindi ka pa natutulog?”

Natigilan ako nang biglang sumulpot si Cadence. Basta na lang talaga siyang napasok dito, parehas sila ni Denise.

May dala siyang dalawang plastic bag. Napakunot na lang ang noo ko habang nakatingin sa kanya.

“Sabi ni Xanthos punuin ko raw ulit ang laman ng ref n’yo… Saka bakit hindi ka pa natutulog, mare? Miss mo na ba si Xanthos?” nakangising tanong ni Cad nang makalapit na siya sa ’kin.

“Oo, miss ko na siya,” agad na sagot ko.

Nasamid naman si Cad sa sinabi ko at napasapo pa sa dibdib n’ya. Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya habang hinihintay siyang matapos na mag-inarte.

“Grabe, mare… Hindi ka na in denial ngayon? Ebarg, sis. Ganyan dapat, h’wag na kayong magpabebe dahil matatanda na kayo. Lalo na si Xanthos, uugod ugod na ’yon, e,” napapailing na sabi ni Cad.

Hindi ko na lang pinansin ang pinagsasabi n’ya. “Alam mo kung nasaan si Xanthos, diba?”

Napatango si Cad. “Oo, bakit mo natanong?”

“Sabihin mo sa ’kin ang address kung nasaan siya. Pupuntahan ko siya ngayon din… Ikaw muna ang magbantay sa kambal,” utos ko sa kanya.

Napakamot si Cad sa batok n’ya at may inabot na susi sa ’kin. “Ayan ang susi ng bahay na tinutuluyan n’ya ngayon. Text ko sa ’yo ’yung address.”

Agad akong lumabas ng pad ni Xanthos nang mai-text na sa ’kin ni Cad ang address. Dali dali akong sumakay ng taxi. Kung alam ko lang na malapit lang pala ang tinutuluyan ni Xanthos ngayon, sana kanina pa ako nagpunta sa kanya.

Tahimik na naghihintay lang ako na makarating kami sa address na ’yon. Pilit kong pinakakalma ang sarili ko pero nagwawala na ang puso ko ngayon… Sasabihin ko na talaga ngayon ang nararamdaman ko, bahala na kung ano ang mangyari. Wala na ring panahon para magpatumpik-tumpik ako… Gaya nga ng sabi nina Cad, hindi na kami mga bata para maglaro.

Agad akong bumaba ng taxi matapos kong magbayad. Bumungad sa ’kin ang malaking bahay na kulay black and white ang disenyo ng bahay at malaki rin ito… Hindi ko alam na may iba pang bahay si Xanthos na malapit lang.

Agad na ’kong pumasok sa loob gamit ang susi na binigay sa ’kin ni Cad. Agad kong nilibot ang tingin ko sa paligid upang hanapin si Xanthos pero sasakit yata ang ulo ko dahil nakapatay ang ilaw.

“X-Xanthos…”

Sinubukan kong maghanap ng switch. Agad kong pinindot ang nahawakan ko at laking pasasalamat ko nang bumukas ang ilaw.

Natigilan ako nang maabutan ko si Xanthos na nakahiga sa couch at nakapikit. Natutulog ba siya?

“I said I’m fine, Cad. Just leave me alone,” he said while his eyes are still closed.

Lumapit ako sa kanya at umupo sa tapat n’ya. Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko at marahang dinutdot ang braso n’ya.

“Xanthos… Open your eyes, I’m Kiara,” sabi ko saka muling niyugyog ang braso n’ya.

Dahan dahan n’yang idinilat ang mga mata saka napatitig sa ’kin. Napalunok na lang ako nang magtagpo ang mga mata namin.

“Bakit bigla kang umalis? Akala ko ba mahal mo ’ko?” tanong ko sa mahinang boses habang nakatitig sa kanya.

Hindi siya nakapagsalita at nakatitig lang sa ’kin. Napatungo na lang ako at napahawak sa damit n’ya.

“W-Wala ka bang sasabihin?” tanong ko na lang.

Agad na bumangon si Xanthos at napaiwas ng tingin sa ’kin. Bahagya n’yang ginulo ang sariling buhok saka napabuntonghininga.

“What are you doing here?” he asked and stood up.

Hinabol ko siya ng tingin nang agad siyang lumayo sa akin at nagtungo sa kusina. Agad akong tumayo at sumunod sa kanya saka humawak sa braso n’ya.

“Why are you suddenly avoiding me, Xanthos?” I asked in a soft voice.

Xanthos sighed and looked at me. “I need self-control, Kiara. Being with you for now doesn’t help. I-I just need a few days and I’ll be back with you again. I just need to–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“I love you, Xanthos.”

Natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. Kitang kita ko kung paano siya natulos sa kinatatayuan n’ya at tila hindi makapaniwalang napatitig sa ’kin.

“You said last time that you love me so much… hindi ba totoo ’yon?” tanong ko habang nakatitig sa kanya.

Hindi nakasagot si Xanthos. Nakatitig pa rin siya sa ’kin at mukhang hindi pa siya nakakamove on sa sinabi ko kanina.

“I-It’s true, of course it’s true… I love you so much, Kiara,” he muttered while staring at me.

I just smiled. I hugged his nape and crushed my lips against his. Halatang nagulat siya sa ginawa ko pero makalipas lang ang ilang saglit, yumakap na siya sa baywang ko at agad na tinugon ang halik ko.

Naramdaman ko na marahan n’ya kong binuhat at pinaupo sa malapit na mesa habang patuloy na nakikipaglabanan ng mainit na halik sa ’kin.

“Do you have a room here, Xanthos?” I asked against our kisses.

Xanthos bit and sucked my lower lip before answering. “Yes, why?”

I distanced my face from him and stared at him… “Let’s make love, Xanthos.”

Xanthos smiled at me and suddenly pulled me closer to him and encircled my legs around his waist.

“You don’t have to say that, baby… we will surely do.”

Chapter Thirty-Seven

I don’t know how we made our way to his room. I’m just hugging his nape while kissing him with equal fire as his. I don’t even care about everything anymore… I just want his kisses, his touch, I want all of him.

Xanthos gently laid my back on the bed and stared at me. His eyes are telling thousand words, his eyes alone reached my heart. I just smiled at him and caressed his cheeks.

“Take me all night, Xanthos. I’m all yours as you are mine…” I mumbled and gave his lips a soft kiss.

Xanthos stared at me lovingly. I can see in his eyes how he treasure this moment. He’s not even blinking as if I’ll disappear once he closed his eyes.

“I love you so much, baby… I love you so much that I can even die for you,” Xanthos murmured while staring at me.

“I love you too, Xanthos… You don’t know how long I waited for this moment,” I said and smiled at him.

Xanthos crushed his lips on mine and kissed me slowly as if he’s savoring every seconds of our hot kiss. I hugged his nape and played my tongue with his. I moaned softly when his hand reached my leg and caressed it. I gripped his shirt when his hand went inside my silk night gown, up to my waist, up to my breast… I didn’t even realize I’m just wearing something like this when I came here.

Xanthos distanced himself from me for a moment and removed his shirt and just threw it somewhere. I unconsciously bit my lower lip while staring at his ripped and sexy tattooed body.

Xanthos spread my legs and positioned himself in between. I just hugged his nape when he started kissing me again. I didn’t waste any time and immediately responded to his passionate kiss.

“X-Xanthos…” I mumbled and started moving my hips against his that earned a needy moan from Xanthos.

“Kiara, behave… Let me handle this,” Xanthos warned me and kissed me again.

I moaned when his hand reached my breast again. I gripped his hair gently when his thumb and forefinger teased my aching nipple. I bit his lower lip and licked it when he suddenly pinched my nipple with his fingers. I gripped his hair tighter and arched my body.

My body became more sensitive now, it’s been so long since the last time I had sex with him… My body is really yearning for him right now.

I gasped when Xanthos suddenly ripped my night gown. He also put his hand on my back and ripped my clothes again from my behind. My night gown was torned into two. I’m just wearing an underwear and brassiere right now. He threw my torned night gown somewhere. My heart beats faster when he started roaming his eyes around my body. I bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze.

“I-I’m not that sexy just like before… I-I hope I can still satisfy you,” I mumbled.

Xanthos held my chin and made me face him. I stared at his eyes. His eyes look serious as if he didn’t like what I said.

“No other woman can satisfy aside from you. I don’t find other women attractive if they’re not you… You don’t know how much enthralled I am at this moment… You are so beautiful that I can’t take my eyes off you. Every part of you is beautiful, every inch of your body is a sight to behold…” he said while staring at me and kissed my hand.

I felt something churned in my stomach with his remark. His words are enough to make me feel beautiful more than ever. I never felt this beautiful before… How can his words drastically change the way I see myself?

I just closed my eyes when he planted soft kisses all over my face, down to my jaw, to my neck, to my chest… He started kissing every part of me. I held his shoulder and gently gripped it.

“Xanthos… kiss me, please.”

Xanthos gladly obliged and gave me a slow and captivating kiss. The movement of his lips are slow and tender as if he’s savoring every moment. I just found myself kissing him back with equal manner.

I felt Xanthos hand on my back. He expertly unclasped my brassiere and finally removed it from my body. I didn’t bother to cover myself and let his hand do the magic there. I unconsciously bit his bottom lip when he started fondling my breast in a gentle manner. I moaned against his kisses and hugged his nape tighter.

“Hmm…” I moaned when Xanthos’ tongue find its way inside my mouth. I just gripped him tighter when his lips went down to my jaw… His slow kisses went down and down until it reached my neck. I let out a heavy breath when he bit my sensitive skin there and sucked it afterwards. I’m sure it will leave a mark but I don’t care anymore.

His lips went down again until it finally reached my breast. My eyes dilated when he ran his tongue around my nipple, as if he’s purposely avoiding it. I gripped his hair as I arch my body.

“X-Xanthos… please, I-I want you so much,” I mumbled desperately.

I finally let out a breathy moan when his tongue flicked my aching nipple. He fondled my other breast with his hand. My body arched more when he finally put my nipple in his mouth and sucked it. I moaned helplessly when he played with it with his tongue while sucking it. I just found myself convulsing in so much pleasure… My body really became sensitive indeed.

“Aahhh…” I moaned when Xanthos’ other hand went down in between my legs. He put his hand inside my underwear and touched my damp center.

“You are so wet for me… This is making me lose my sanity, Kiara,” Xanthos murmured and sucked my other nipple.

“X-Xanthos… Oohhh!” My toes curled when his forefinger touched my quivering cl-t. He stopped playing with my nipple and stared at me, as if he’s looking what kind of reaction I make.

Xanthos’ slowly put his finger inside me. My eyes dilated and my body arched in pleasure when he started thrusting his finger slowly. I gripped his arms when he added another finger and started thrusting his fingers faster.

“X-Xanthos! Aahhh… P-Please, oohhh…” I spread my legs wider to give him more access. Xanthos gladly obliged and thrusts his fingers faster. I let out a breathy moan when he gently bit my nipple and pulled it then ran his tongue on it. I let out a soft sob because of unbearable pleasure that he’s giving me.

“Aahhh…” I moaned softly. He alternately played with both of my nipples while thrusting his fingers faster. I gripped his shoulder and let my nails dug his skin when he suddenly curled his fingers inside me.

But I suddenly groaned in protest when he removed his fingers inside me. Xanthos just smirked at me when he saw my reaction. He distanced himself a little and removed the last piece of cloth covering my body. He also threw my underwear and held both of my legs… I bit my lower lip when he slowly spread my legs. My body, especially my center part quivered in excitement. I just let him see that part of me. He stared at it as if it will be the last time. I can feel his heavy breathing, he gripped my legs tighter as if he’s controlling not to lose himself in this moment.

“Aahhh!” I gripped the bedsheets when Xanthos suddenly buried his face in between my legs. I cried his name when I felt his soft lips on my wet center.

I almost lost it when he ran his tongue from my shivering hole up to my cl-t. I unconsciously gripped his hair as my legs trembled in pleasure but he didn’t seem to mind. His lips moved on my core, as if he’s just kissing my lips. I buried my head on the pillow and arched my body more. I even spread my legs wider for him and gave him full access to my center.

“X-Xanthos… Aahhh, m-more… Please lick me more… oohhh!” I moaned louder when he suddenly tried to put his tongue inside my tight hole and teased me there. My eyes dilated when I felt his thumb on my cl-t, he massaged it with his thumb while the tip of his tongue is playing and teasing my hole.

I looked at Xanthos… My body shivered even more when I saw him staring at me while. Tila hindi nito pinalalagpas ang bawat reaksyon ko sa ginagawa n’ya.

“Fuck… Xanthos aahhh…” I moaned helplessly when I felt his fingers separating my folds and licking my insides more. I gripped his hair tighter when I felt something familiar building up in my stomach.

“S-Stop, Xanthos oohhh! I-I’m almost… aahhh!” I moaned loudly when Xanthos didn’t listed and just moved and thrusts his tongue faster. His fingers also didn’t stop working on my center. His thumb and index finger are playing with my cl-t, gently pinching and pulling it while his tongue is playing with my hole.

My toes curled when I felt the need to release this heat building up inside me. I tried to push Xanthos’ head away from my center but he just spread my legs wider and buried his head deeper in between… Then suddenly, my body was awash with overlapping waves of pleasure.

“Aahhh! I’m… aahhh! X-Xanthos,” I moaned his name when I finally came. My eyes dilated in pleasure as I came in his mouth. I already came but he didn’t stop moving his lips and tongue. I moaned weakly and tried to push his head.

“Xanthos… I-I can’t… I can’t take it anymore, please stop…” I mumbled when he starts playing with my cl-t again.

Xanthos stopped and went up to see my face closely. I just stared at him back with my sated face. Xanthos smirked at me and gently caressed my face.

“My baby didn’t last ten minutes. We’ll work on that again next time…” he said and distanced himself to remove his short together with his boxer.

Xanthos held both of my legs and spread it wider. I just bit my lower lip when he positioned himself in between my legs.

I bit my lower lip and stared at him. I know this will be kinds painful again, I have to prepare myself considering the last time I had sex and his size… It’s no joke.

“Just tell me if you want me to stop or if it’s too painful for you,” Xanthos muttered and caressed my cheek. I just smiled at him and nodded.

My legs shivered when I felt the tip of his manhood on my wet center. I gripped his shoulder and arched my body closer to his. Xanthos whispered sweet nothings to my ears while slowly penetrating my core. I gasped as my nails dug on his skin when he finally put c-ck inside.

“I’m halfway in… are you alright?” he asked in a soft voice.

He’s halfway in? Just half?

“I’m fine, it’s bearable… please, continue,” I said and encircled my legs around his waist and moved my hips.

“Fuck, Kiara… stop that,” he mumbled and held my hips.

“I said I’m fine… P-Please, stop making me wait,” I pleaded and tried to move my hips again.

Xanthos’ jaw clenched and his eyes darkened with desire when I tried to move again. I gasped when he held my hips and started moving on his own. I hugged his nape when he suddenly shoved all of his manhood inside me. I moaned loudly and gripped his hair for support.

“X-Xanthos… Aahhhh! T-This is too… this is too much,” I mumbled and held his chest down to his abs and tried to push him but he just held my legs and spread it wider before pulling out his c-ck then shoving it again inside, this time, it’s much deeper.

“Fuck, baby… Relax your muscles, you’re so tight… I might really lose it,” he murmured while thrusting slowly.

I bit my lower lip and tried to control my folds just tightened around his shaft more when Xanthos suddenly played with my nipples. Xanthos let out a sexy moan when my core tightened around his c-ck again. He spread my legs wider and started thrusting faster.

“X-Xanthos… s-slowly, aahhh!” I moaned helplessly when he didn’t listen to me and just shoved his c-ck deeper into my depths. My eyes dilated and my body arched because of the familiar feeling building up in my stomach.

He rammed himself faster. I tried to move my hips to meet his hard and fast thrusts but I guess it was too much for me. Xanthos crushed his lips on mine, we exchanged saliva as his relentless thrusts rammed into me… his thrusts were merciless, out of control, and wild… It seems like he finally lose control of himself.

“Aahhh! X-Xanthos, oohhhh!” I moaned loudly when he removed his c-ck from me and shoved it inside in one swift move. My eyes dilated and my toes curled because of that wild movement.

“X-Xanthos… I’m almost there, p-please, let me have it,” I moaned and moved my hips against his.

Xanthos gladly obliged and thrusts faster inside me. His movements were to rough as if it will break me. Even the bed is creaking uncontrollably as it hits the wall loudly… But we didn’t bother giving a fuck over it.

“Aahhh! X-Xanthos, fuck! I’m near, aahhh! Aahhhh…” My folds tightened around his hige shaft when I felt another waves of pleasure building up inside me.

I closed my eyes and parted my lips when I finally had my release. My body arched on its own and I held his shoulder with my shaking hands because of that intense orgasm that I just had. I can feel my legs shaking uncontrollably. I let out a soft cry because of too much pleasure that he’s giving me.

“Fuck,” Xanthos muttered and thrusts faster. My toes curled when I felt his manhood convulsing inside me. I gripped his shoulder and my lips parted when I felt his c-ck becoming bigger inside. He spread my legs wider and rammed himself faster and rougher.

“Aahhh…” I moaned helplessly when he clasped my hips and poured his seed inside me. Xanthos’ thrusts slowly as he cam. My eyes dilated when I felt thick liquid gushing inside me.

We’re both panting and sweaty after that mind-blowing sex. Xanthos gave me a soft kiss on my forehead hugged me while our bodies are still connected. I gasped and gripped his arms when I felt his manhood becoming hard again.

I gulped and pushed him. He was taken aback when I suddenly switched our positions, I sat above him without letting our bodies separate. His sexy lips parted while staring at me. I smirked and ran my finger on his ripped body.

“I’m the one in charge now,” I said and started moving above him.

Xanthos gripped my legs tighter and closed his eyes when I rotated my hips in slow circles around his c-ck. His jaw clenched as if he’s trying his best to control himself. I smirked when I saw his reaction. I suddenly want to tease him more.

“Xanthos…” I moaned his name and grinded my hips above him. I can see his muscled arms clenching while holding my legs.

I gasped when Xanthos changed our positions again. My lips parted when he suddenly pulled his c-ck out of my wet feminity. I arched my body when my cented immediately longed for his shaft.

“Kiara, dumapa ka,” utos n’ya habang matiim na nakatitig sa ’kin.

I don’t know but there’s something domineering in his voice that made me follow his order. I just bit my lower lip and did what he wanted. I gripped the bedsheets tightly when I felt him spread my legs from my behind. I just let out a loud moan and buried my face on the pillow when he suddenly pushed his heavy erection in my opening.

I gasped when Xanthos held my arm without much effort and pulled me closer to him. I can feel his sweaty body on my back. He held my jaw while thrusting slowly but deeply inside me… But he immediately began thrusting faster, his other hand is holding the headboard. The bed created louder sound because of his harsh movements. He murmured something in my ear.

“I have energy drink in my ref… please drink it, Kiara,” he mumbled and suddenly rammed himself deeper inside me.

“W-Why?” I asked and held the headboard too for support.

“You need a lot of energy, baby… because we’re gonna do this all night.”

Chapter Thirty-Eight

“Damn, I’m still not good at this.”

Napangiwi ako nang matikman ang soup na ginawa ko. I already attended cooking class before just like Xanthos but I’m still not as good as him. That’s not fair. He’s almost good at everything… well, especially in bed.

I just giggled and shook my head. Masakit na nga ang buong katawan ko, nagawa pang gumana ng malanding hormones ko.

Sana lang talaga mapagtyagaan ni Xanthos ang soup na ’to. Tulog pa siya ngayon kaya ako na ang nagluto dahil ako naman ang unang nagising. Masakit pa talaga ang katawan ko pero kaya ko namang kumilos.

“Hmm, maybe I should add some seasonings,” I mumbled. My soup really tastes bland.

“Kiara!”

Halos mapatalon ako sa gulat nang marinig ko ang nagpa-panic na boses ni Xanthos. Nakapamaywang na hinarap ko siya.

“Why are you shouting my name first thing in the morning? Kung makasigaw ka naman akala mo may sunog o–”

Hindi ko na natuloy ang sasabihin ko nang agad na lumapit sa ’kin si Xanthos at sinugod ako ng yakap. Napakurap na lang ako at ginantihan na lang din siya ng yakap.

“Damn, I though it was just a dream. I can’t believe last night was real… I’m so damn happy,” he murmured and hugged me tighter.

Napaismid na lang ako nang nanlambot na naman ako sa yakap n’ya. Yumakap na lang ako nang mahigpit sa baywang n’ya. Agad namang sinubsob ni Xanthos ang mukha sa leeg ko.

“What makes you think that last night was just a dream?” I chuckled.

Xanthos distanced his face on my neck and stared at me. I smiled when I saw his face. He really looked scared as if I will be gone in his sight.

“Last night was too good to be true… You said you love me, we kissed, we had a wonderful sex… I was scared when I woke up without you by my side. I though everything that happened last night was just a dream,” he mumbled while staring at me.

I laughed and hugged his waist. “Ang praning mo naman… Gano’n mo ba ako kamahal?” natatawang tanong ko.

“I love you more than myself,” agad na sagot n’ya habang titig na titig sa ’kin.

Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko at nagpigil ng ngiti. Dinampian ko ng halik ang labi n’ya saka yumakap sa batok n’ya.

“Upo ka muna, tatapusin ko lang ’tong ginagawa ko. Okay?” sabi ko saka bahagyang kinurot ang matangos n’yang ilong.

Muli ko na siyang tinalikuran at ibinalik ang atensyon ko sa niluluto ko. Natigilan na lang ako nang maramdaman kong agad na yumakap si Xanthos sa akin na tila ayaw n’ya ’kong pakawalan.

“Xanthos… hindi naman ako mawawala,” sabi ko na lang saka hinawakan ang kamay n’ya na nakayakap sa baywang ko.

“I love you so much,” bulong n’ya saka muling sinubsob ang mukha sa leeg ko.

Napailing na lang ako at hinayaan siyang nakayakap sa ’kin habang inaayos ko ang ginawa kong soup. Mukha namang wala ng balak magpapigil ang lalaking ’to.

Nang matapos na ’ko, pinaupo ko na si Xanthos. Akmang uupo ako sa tabi n’ya pero agad n’ya ’kong hinila paupo sa kandungan n’ya. Muli siyang yumakap sa baywang ko.

“Dito ka lang,” sabi n’ya saka bahagyang kinagat ang balikat ko.

“Xanthos… Why did you do that?” I asked and chuckled when he bit my shoulder again.

Nahihirapan akong kumilos dahil ayaw n’yang humiwalay sa ’kin pero hinayaan ko na lang siya. Hindi rin naman ako makakatanggi kapag tumingin ako sa mukha n’ya.

“Xanthos… ikaw na lang ang gumawa ng soup for us,” sabi ko saka tumagilid at yumakap sa batok n’ya.

Xanthos’ forehead creased. “Why? You already made one, let’s eat this,” he said and pointed the soup I made.

“That soup… is terrible,” I murmured and scratched my nape.

Xanthos chuckled and kissed my lips. “I will still eat it because you made it,” he said and took the spoon to have a taste of the soup I made.

I stared at him and waited for his reaction.

“It doesn’t taste terrible, it’s just kinda bland. We can still do something about this,” he said then hugged my waist tighter.

“Mahal mo pa rin ako kahit ganito ako magluto?” nakakunot-noong tanong ko.

Natawa si Xanthos. “Of course… I can cook for us anyway.”

I sighed and buried my face on his neck. “Teach me how to cook, Xanthos. I want to learn how you cook delicious menudo and carbonara,” I said and played with his hair.

“Sure, baby,” he mumbled and kissed my temple.

HINDI KO alam kung gaano kami katagal naglandian ni Xanthos sa bahay n’ya na ’yon. Kung hindi ko pa ipapaalala sa kanya ang kambal, baka nakayakap pa rin siya sa ’kin at hindi nakilos.

“Ay wow, matapos kong alagaan ang mga anak n’yo at papasukin sa school, babalik kayo rito nang hindi na mapaghiwalay? Grabe naman, mga mare,” napapailing na sabi ni Cad habang nakatingin sa ’min.

Hindi siya pinansin ni Xanthos at tuloy lang na nakayakap sa ’kin. Natatawang napailing na lang ako at marahang hinaplos ang likod n’ya… para siyang bata.

“H’wag ka ngang panira, Cad. Nakakakilig kaya! Myghad, sa wakas at nangyari na talaga ang matagal ko ng hiling,” tila kinikilig na sabi ni Denise habang nakatingin sa ’min ni Xanthos.

Natigilan lang kami nang umalis si Xanthos sa pagkakasubsob sa leeg ko saka tiningnan nang masama sina Cad.

“Umalis na kayong dalawa,” masungit na sabi ni Xanthos saka mas lalo akong hinila palapit sa kanya.

“Ay grabe, Sir… wala kang utang na loob sa president ng fans club n’yo. Excuse me lang, pero ang laki ng contribution ko. Kung wala ako, malamang hanggang ngayon hindi pa kayo nagbabalikan kasi mga pabebe kayo,” nakapamaywang na reklamo ni Denise.

“Thank you, Denise,” nakangiting sabi ko na lang.

Si Xanthos naman ay tila walang pakialam sa pag-e-emote ni Denise at patuloy lang na nakayakap sa ’kin.

“Fine, makalayas na nga lang. Mukhang gusto na kaming sipain paalis ni Sir, e,” napapailing na sabi ni Denise saka tumayo at lumabas na ng pad ni Xanthos

“Bye na rin, malalandi.” Napakamot naman si Cad sa batok n’ya at sumunod na lang din kay Denise at umalis.

“Umalis na sila, Xanthos,” sabi ko na lang saka marahang hinaplos ang buhok n’ya.

“I love you so much,” Xanthos murmured and planted soft kisses on my neck.

I smiled and swirl his curly hair around my finger. “I love you too.”

Napatunghay si Xanthos sa sinabi ko saka tumitig sa ’kin. He let out a heavy sigh and caressed my cheek gently. He smiled at me and kissed my lips.

“Please, say it again,” sabi n’ya habang titig na titig sa akin.

“I love you, Xanthos Archante. I love you, I love you, I love you…”

Xanthos bit his lower lip and smiled. Tila nanggigigil na niyakap na naman n’ya ako saka sumubsob sa leeg ko. Natawa na lang ako ay niyakap din siya. Para talaga siyang bata ngayong araw.

NANG SUMAPIT na ang uwian ng kambal, napagdesisyunan na naming puntahan sila sa school para sunduin. Malamang magugulat ang kambal dahil ito ang unang beses na parehas kami ni Xanthos na susundo sa kanila.

“Xanthos, dalhin muna natin sa mall ang kambal bago tayo umuwi,” sabi ko saka yumakap sa braso n’ya pagkalabas namin sa kotse.

“Sure, baby…” he said and kissed my hand.

“Mama! Papa!”

Agad akong napangiti nang marinig ang boses ni Xiana. Nag-uunahan silang tumakbo ni Xevan papalapit sa amin ni Xanthos. Agad akong yumuko at pinupog ng halik ang kambal. Napahagikhik naman sila sa ginawa ko.

“Mama, parehas po kayong pumunta ni Papa! I’m so happy!” tuwang tuwa na sabi ni Xiana nang buhatin sila ni Xanthos.

“Mama, love n’yo na po ang isa’t isa?” tila inosenteng tanong ni Xevan habang nakayakap sa leeg ng Papa n’ya.

Natawa na lang ako at bahagyang kinurot ang maliit na ilong ni Xevan. Kung ano-ano talaga ang tinuturo ni Denise sa mga anak ko.

Panay ang kwento ni Xiana nang nasa kotse na kami. Halatang tuwang tuwa sila na sabay kaming sumundo ni Xanthos sa kanila. Hindi pa kasi kami nakapunta nang sabay sa school nila, ito ang unang beses.

Nagtungo agad kami sa mall. Nakahawak sa ’kin si Xevan habang si Xiana naman ay buhat ni Xanthos. Panay pa rin ang kwento n’ya. Napapangiti na lang ako habang nakikinig.

“Tapos Papa, meron pong lumapit sa ’kin na classmate ko. He said crush n’ya raw po ako,” sabi ni Xiana.

Kitang kita ko kung paano nagbago ang ekspresyon ni Xanthos. Agad na napakunot ang noo n’ya. Napakagat na lang ako sa ibabang labi ko upang magpigil ng tawa.

“Who is he?” mariing tanong ni Xanthos kay Xiana.

Pabiro kong hinampas ang braso ni Xanthos saka bumulong sa kanya.

“Don’t be so mad, Daddy… It looks like you wanna beat someone up,” natatawang sabi ko saka hinawakan ang kamay n’ya.

Napaismid na lang si Xanthos. “Kiss me if you want me to calm down,” sabi n’ya saka inilapit ang pisngi sa ’kin.

Natawa na lang ako at dinampian ng halik ang pisngi n’ya.

“OMG, Mama! Ang sweet n’yo po ni Papa,” tila kinikilig na sabi ni Xiana.

Natawa na lang si Xanthos at dinampian ng halik ang pisngi ng anak namin. Napangiti na lang ako habang nakatitig sa kanila.

Ang tagal din naming naglaro at naggala sa mall. Kitang kita ko sa kambal na tuwang tuwa sila. Kung minsan ay napapatitig na lang ako sa kanilang tatlo sa tuwing naglalaro sila… Napapaisip ako na sobrang swerte ko dahil kitang kita ko kung gaano kamahal ni Xanthos ang mga anak namin.

“Mama…”

Napatingin ako kay Xiana. Hinihintay namin dito ang Papa n’ya pati si Xevan na bumili ng ice cream. Natigilan ako nang yumakap si Xiana sa baywang ko saka ngumiti nang matamis sa ’kin.

Pakiramdam ko tila may kung ano’ng humaplos sa puso ko nang makita ang magandang ngiti ng anak ko.

“Super happy ko po na love n’yo na ni Papa ang isa’t isa. Super happy ko po talaga,” sabi n’ya habang nakayakap pa rin sa akin.

Napangiti ako at marahang hinaplos ang buhok n’ya.

“Sorry kung kayo ang nahirapan ni Xevan sa naging setup namin ng Papa n’yo… Don’t worry, babawi kami sa inyong dalawa. Mas magiging mabuting magulang pa lalo kami sa inyo,” sabi ko saka dinampian ng halik ang noo n’ya.

“Best parents na po kayo para sa ’min ni Kuya Xevan. Kaya nga po love na love namin kayo,” sabi ni Xiana saka mas hinigpitan ang yakap sa ’kin. Lalo naman akong napangiti at napayakap din sa kanya.

Natigilan kami ni Xiana nang makarinig ng iyak ng bata sa bilihan ng ice cream kung nasaan sina Xanthos. Agad kong hinawakan kamay ni Xiana at nagtungo kami ro’n.

Natigilan kami nang makitang may batang babae na naiyak sa harapan nina Xanthos. Agad akong lumapit sa kanila dahil nagtitinginan na ang mga tao sa direksyon nila.

“What happened here, Xanthos?” tanong ko nang makalapit sa kanila.

Xanthos scratched his nape. “I-I don’t really understand. She just suddenly cried,” Xanthos said while looking at the kid.

“He’s scary!” iyak ng bata saka itinuro si Xanthos.

Napakurap si Xanthos at nagtatakang itinuro ang sarili n’ya. Agad kong hinampas ang braso ni Xanthos at tiningnan siya nang masama.

“Pati ba naman bata, tinatakot mo?” panenermon ko sa kanya.

“I-I didn’t do anything to that kid, baby. Tanungin mo pa si Xevan,” depensa n’ya saka itinuro si Xevan na tahimik lang sa tabi n’ya.

“Papa didn’t do anything bad to her, Mama. Sinabihan lang po siya ni Papa na h’wag siyang sisingit sa pila dahil bad ’yon,” paliwanag naman ni Xevan.

Agad na dumating ang nanay ng batang naiyak.

“Bakit ka naiyak? Sino’ng umaway sa ’yo?” tanong nito habang pinupunasan ang luha ng anak.

“Ate, that scary guy got mad at me! Sumingit lang naman po ako sa pila!” sumbong ng bata saka itinuro si Xanthos.

Mukhang kapatid pala ng babae ang bata.

Agad na tumayo ang babae at galit na hinarap si Xanthos. “Ano ba ’yan, Sir? Pati ba naman bata papagalitan mo dahil sa maliit na bagay lang–”

Natigilan ang babae nang mapatingin kay Xanthos. Agad na napataas ang kilay ko nang mapalitan ng ngiti ang kaninang galit na mukha ng babae.

“Oh… Sir, pasensya na sa kapatid ko. Medyo makulit talaga siya… Nasaktan ka po ba? Pwede ko bang makuha ang number mo kung sakaling–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

“Mukhang wala ng problema, Xanthos. Halika na, sa iba na lang tayo bumili ng ice cream para sa mga anak natin ,” sabi ko at pinagdiinan pa ang huling salita.

Agad akong humawak sa braso ni Xanthos at hinila siya palayo ro’n.

Mukhang mamomroblema pa yata ako kay Xanthos. Bakit ang lapitin n’ya pa rin sa mga babae?

---

“Hey, are you still mad?” Xanthos asked and hugged me from behind.

Humarap ako sa kanya at yumakap sa kanya. Naramdaman ko na lang na napangiti siya saka marahang hinaplos ang buhok ko.

“Ang tanda mo na… bakit ang dami pa ring babaeng interesado sa ’yo?” nakasimangot na tanong ko.

Natawa na lang si Xanthos saka mas hinila ako palapit sa kanya. Pinaunan n’ya ako sa braso n’ya. Napapikit na lang ako nang maramdaman kong inaamoy n’ya ang buhok ko habang hinahaplos ’yon.

Ang sarap sa pakiramdam ng ginagawa n’ya, lalong nakakaantok.

“Kiara…”

I slowly opened my eyes and looked at him. Seryoso ang mukha n’ya na nakatitig sa ’kin habang patuloy pa ring hinahaplos ang buhok ko.

“Balak ko ng palabasin sa kulungan ang tatay mo.”

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. Hindi agad ako nakasagot at napatitig na lang sa kanya, pilit kong binabasa ang iniisip n’ya ngayon.

“Bakit? Iyon ba ang gusto mo?” tanong ko sa mahinang boses.

Hindi agad nakasagot si Xanthos. Napabuntonghininga siya habang nakatitig pa rin sa akin.

“He’s still your father, Kiara… I-I still can’t forgive him, but he’s still your father,” he mumbled and avoided my gaze.

Napabuntonghininga ako at hinawakan ang magkabilang pisngi n’ya at pinaharap siya sa ’kin.

“Xanthos… Is that what you really want?” I asked while staring at him. “He may be my father, but what he did to you and your family was unforgivable… You don’t have to force yourself like this just because he’s my father… Even I can’t forgive him until now,” I whispered and gave him a soft kiss on his chin.

Xanthos gave me a faint smile and caressed my cheek.

“I… I will try to forgive him. I can’t promise that I can… B-But I’ll try. I have to let go of my past if I want to be a better person for you and our children.”

I sighed while staring at him. He seems serious and determined. I just nodded and smiled at him even though I know that he can’t do that… He will never be able to forgive my father.

But even though he can’t, I will respect it… I’m more than thankful seeing him trying his best to be a better person for me and our children… It’s more than enough.

Chapter Thirty-Nine

“Xanthos, I can go alone. I know you’re not ready to see him yet.”

Napailing si Xanthos sa sinabi ko saka dinampian ng halik ang likod ng palad ko.

“I’ll go with you, Kiara. I can do this.” Xanthos smiled at me and intertwined our fingers.

Napatitig na lang ako sa kanya. Alam kong ngumingiti lang siya sa ’kin pero hindi magagawang makapagsinungaling ng nanginginig n’yang kamay.

Nakalabas na ngayon ng kulungan si Dad at balak naming magkita. Unofficial ang kaso ni Dad at wala rin naman siyang napakitang ebidensya sa mga sinabi n’yang kasalanan n’ya kaya nasabi sa ’kin ni manang na hesitant ang mga pulis na ikulong siya noon… alam kong ipinakulong ni Dad ang sarili n’ya dahil sa akin. Pero sana… sana pinagdusahan na n’ya ang naging kasalanan n’ya kay Xanthos at sa nanay nito. Alam kong kulang pa ang pamamalagi ni Dad sa kulungan, pero pinili ni Xanthos na palayain siya at subukang patawarin siya para sa pamilya namin.

Tahimik kami sa kotse ni Xanthos. Napapatingin ako sa kanya habang nagmamaneho siya at kitang kita ko na malalim ang iniisip n’ya ngayon. Hindi ko siya masisisi. Sa totoo lang ayaw ko na siyang pasamahin sa ’kin pero sadyang mapilit siya.

Makalipas ang ilang minuto, nakarating din kami agad sa restaurant kung saan kami magkikita ni Dad. Agad na bumaba si Xanthos at pinagbuksan ako ng kotse saka hinawakan ang kamay ko. Muli ko namang naramdaman ang panlalamig ng kamay n’ya.

Napatigil siya sa paglalakad nang makita n’ya si Dad mula sa glass wall ng restaurant. Nakaupo si Dad habang naghihintay sa akin. Naramdaman ko kung paano mas lalong nanginig ang kamay ni Xanthos.

“Kiara… I-I’m sorry but I can’t… I can’t face him yet. I’m sorry, I really can’t forgive him yet. I-I can’t even look at him,” sabi ni Xanthos saka napaiwas ng tingin kay Dad.

Napabuntonghininga ako at hinawakan ang magkabilang pisngi ni Xanthos saka pinaharap siya sa ’kin. Napatingin naman siya sa ’kin. Kitang kita ko sa mga mata n’ya ang takot, pag-aalinlangan, at halo halong emosyon. Nanginginig din ang mga kamay n’ya sa mga oras na ’to.

“Xanthos… makinig ka sa ’kin.” Seryosong tumingin ako sa mga mata n’ya. “Hindi mo kailangang patawarin si Dad para sa ’kin kung hindi mo pa kaya… Maiintindihan ko nga rin kung hindi mo pa siya magawang patawarin habang buhay. H’wag mong pilitin ang sarili mo dahil maiintindihan kita, mapatawad mo man si Dad o hindi. Alam kong mabigat pa rin sa loob mo, hindi madaling kalimutan ang lahat para sa ’yo… Kaya maiintindihan kita kahit hindi mo siya magawang patawarin… Mahal pa rin kita kahit anong mangyari,” sabi ko saka bahagyang ngumiti sa kanya.

Hindi nakapagsalita si Xanthos. Agad n’ya ’kong hinila at niyakap nang mahigpit. Napangiti na lang ako at marahang hinaplos ang likod n’ya.

“Thank you for understanding, Kiara… I honestly want to be a better man for you and I want to start by forgiving your father but–” agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin n’ya.

Bahagya akong dumistansya sa kanya at tinitigan ang mukha n’ya. Napabuntonghininga ako at marahang hinaplos ang pisngi n’ya.

“You already became a better man for me. You don’t need to forgive him to be a better man for me… you are already the best and the perfect man for me… So don’t force yourself to forgive him. Don’t forgive him if your heart is still not ready for it. It’s okay… Naiintindihan ko.”

Xanthos bit his lower lip. Bahagyang namula ang ilong n’ya pati ang tainga n’ya. Napangiti na lang ako nang muli n’ya ’kong yakapin nang mahigpit.

“You’re also the best and the perfect woman for me, Kiara… I love you so much,” he muttered and kissed my forehead.

I smiled and gave him a soft kiss on his lips. “I love you too.”

Nanatili na lang si Xanthos sa kotse at ako na lang ang pumasok sa restaurant. Agad na napatayo si Dad at halatang nagulat nang makita ako. Huminga ako nang malalim at pilit na pinakalma ang sarili ko saka umupo sa tapat n’ya.

Umupo na lang din si Dad. “N-Nasaan si Xanthos? Akala ko kasama mo siya,” sabi n’ya.

Napatingin ako kay Dad. Halos puti na ang lahat ng buhok n’ya at malaki ang pinayat n’ya. Tila naging magaspang din ang mga kamay n’ya dahil sa pagtatrabaho sa kulungan. Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya at uminom ng tubig.

“Sa tingin mo magagawa ka n’yang harapin matapos ng ginawa mo sa nanay n’ya noon? Sobra sobra na nagawa ka n’yang palabasin sa kulungan, sobra ka naman kung hihilingin mo pa na makita siya,” mariing sabi ko saka muling tumingin sa kanya.

Natahimik si Dad sa sinabi ko.

“G-Gusto ko lang sanang makahingi ng tawad sa kanya ng personal. Alam kong hindi n’ya ’ko mapapatawad kahit na lumuhod ako sa harapan n’ya… pero gusto ko pa rin humingi ng tawad,” sabi ni Dad saka napatungo.

“You and grandpa caused him too much trauma. Just seeing your face is already too much for him to bear. Just… Just don’t your face to him, it will be better that way. He can’t forgive you yet, but he chose to get you out of the prison because he loves me so much. That man… that man loves me so much that he’s willing to forget everything you did just for me. But I don’t want him to do that. Ayaw kong patawarin ka n’ya dahil hindi mo deserve ang kapatawaran n’ya,” dire-diretsong sabi ko habang nakatitig sa kanya.

Mas lalong lumamlam ang mga mata ni Dad. Naikuyom ko ang mga kamao ko sa ilalim ng mesa.

“Mamuhay ka na lang ng tahimik, Dad. Hahayaan kong makita mo ang mga anak ko paminsan-minsan. Napag-usapan na namin ’yon ni Xanthos at pumayag siya… pero hindi ibig sabihin na hahayaan kong makita mo ang kambal ay pinapatawad na kita. Galit pa rin ako sa ’yo, Dad… Galit na galit pa rin ako sa ’yo at kay Lolo dahil sa pagpapahirap na ginawa n’yo kay Xanthos at sa nanay n’ya,” mariing sabi ko at napakapit nang mahigpit sa sling bag ko.

Tipid na ngumiti si Dad at tumango. “I know, Kiara. Malaki na ang pasasalamat ko na pumayag kang magkita tayo ngayon at pinapayagan mo ’kong makita ang mga apo ko. Salamat, Kiara,” sabi ni Dad saka bahagyang ngumiti sa akin.

Napaiwas na lang ako ng tingin sa kanya at agad na tumayo. “Aalis na ’ko,” sabi ko na lang at dali dali siyang iniwan palabas ng restaurant.

Mabigat pa rin ang dibdib ko habang naglalakad palayo. Napatingin na lang ako kay Xanthos na nasa kotse at naghihintay sa akin… Pakiramdam ko muling gumaan ang pakiramdam ko nang makita ko ang mukha n’ya.

Maybe just like how I give comfort to his existence just like he said to me before… he can give comfort to my heart too.

---

“Bakit bigla kang nagyayaya lumabas?” natatawang tanong ko kay Xanthos.

“Wala lang, I just want to spend some time with you alone… Don’t worry, Denise is taking care of Xiana ang Xevan right now,” Xanthos said and hugged my waist.

Wala na lang akong nagawa kundi ang pumayag. Sabagay, sa tingin ko kailangan nga naming mag-date paminsan-minsan. Pambawi na lang sa ilang taon naming pag-aalinlangan sa isa’t isa.

“Saan tayo pupunta?” tanong ko kay Xanthos habang nagmamaneho siya.

“Church,” sagot n’ya saka hinawakan ang kamay ko.

Natigilan ako sa sinabi n’ya. “I thought you don’t like going to church,” I said while staring at him.

“You don’t know? I weekly go to church with the kids,” he said and intertwined our fingers.

Napasinghap ako sa sinabi n’ya. Hindi nabanggit sa ’kin ng kambal na nagsisimba sila kasama si Xanthos. Hindi ko akalaing magagawa ni Xanthos na magsimba linggo-linggo para sa kambal. Naalala ko noong unang beses kaming nagsimba noon, halos patayin na n’ya sa tingin ang pari dahil hindi n’ya nagugustuhan ang mga sinasabi nito.

Ang laki nga talaga ng pinagbago n’ya.

Tahimik na nakinig kami sa pari nang nasa simbahan na kami. Nakahawak lang siya sa kamay ko habang nakikinig sa pari. Mukhang marami pa talagang nakakagulat na bagay ang hindi ko pa alam kay Xanthos.

Nang matapos ang misa, lumabas na kami ni Xanthos. Natigilan ako nang hilahin n’ya ako papunta sa bilihan ng dirty ice cream.

“Kuya! Nasaan po sina Xiana?”

Natigilan ako nang may mga batang lumapit kay Xanthos. Napangiti naman si Xanthos at bumili ng ice cream para sa mga bata. Natagpuan ko na lang ang sarili ko na nakangiti habang pinagmamasdan siya.

“Bakit hindi n’yo sinusuot ang mga damit na binili namin ni Xiana sa inyo?” tanong ni Xanthos sa mga bata.

Medyo marurungis ang mga bata pero tila hindi n’ya alintana ’yon. Tahimik na nakaupo lang ako habang pinagmamasdan siya. Mukhang kilala ng mga batang ’yon pati ang mga anak namin… Hindi maalis ang ngiti sa labi ko habang nakatititg sa kanya.

“Nilalabhan pa po, kuya. Sino po pala siya?” tanong ng isang bata saka napatingin sa ’kin.

Napangiti si Xanthos bago sumagot. “Siya ang nanay nina Xiana. Siya ang babaeng mahal ko,” sabi ni Xanthos saka bahagyang ginulo ang buhok ng batang nagtanong.

Tila may kung anong humaplos sa puso ko nang marinig ko ang sinabi n’ya sa bata. Bahagyang nanlabo ang paningin ko dahil sa luhang nagbabadyang kumawala. Ang lakas ng kabog ng dibdib ko sa mga oras na ’to dahil sa tuwa.

Ano’ng ginawa ko past life ko para mahalin nang ganito ng katulad ni Xanthos?

Matapos makipag-usap sa mga bata. Nagsimula na kaming maglakad-lakad ni Xanthos. Yumakap ako sa braso n’ya at isinandal ang ulo ko ro’n.

“I love you, Xanthos…” bulong ko.

Halatang natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. Pero agad din naman siyang umakbay sa ’kin at dinampian ng halik ang sentido ko.

“I love you more, Kiara… Mahal na mahal kita,” sabi n’ya saka hinawakan ang kamay ko.

Napangiti na lang ako at tahimik na naglakad kasama siya. Natatandaan ko ang pinupuntahan namin ngayon. Dito kami unang naglakad-lakad ni Xanthos noong unang date namin… Ng mga panahong ’yon, malamang hindi n’ya pa ako mahal at paghihiganti pa lang ang nasa isip n’ya.

Pero ibang iba na ngayon. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang pagmamahal n’ya sa ’kin kahit sa simpleng kilos n’ya.

Inabot kami ng dilim at nakarating kami sa tabing-dagat sa paglalakad. Natigilan ako nang makakita ng pamilyar na yate.

Ito ang yate na una naming sinakyan… marami ang hindi magandang alaala sa yate na ’yon.

Naramdaman kong bahagyang humigpit ang hawak ni Xanthos sa kamay ko. Tumingin siya sa ’kin at tipid na ngumiti.

“I know we don’t have a good memory in that yacht… But I want to remove those memory and replace it with something good. I know what I did back then was unforgivable, but I’ll work hard to repent on it. I promise that I will do everything I can to make you happy,” he mumbled and kissed my forehead. I just smiled and closed my eyes.

Nilibot ko ang tingin sa yate nang makasakay na kami ro’n. Walang masyadong nagbago ro’n at pakiramdam ko ito pa rin ang hitsura nito nang huli kong nakita ang yate na ’to.

Tahimik na pinagmasdan ko ang buwan pati na ang dagat. Napapikit ako at dinama ang malamig na hangin na tumatama sa katawan ko.

Natigilan na lang ako nang maramdaman kong yumakap si Xanthos mula sa likuran ko. Isinandal n’ya ang baba n’ya sa balikat ko saka sinubsob ang mukha sa leeg ko.

“Kiara… I know I already told this to you like a hundred times… But I still want to tell you that I love you so much… Sobra… sobrang mahal na mahal kita, Kiara.”

Pagkasabi n’ya no’n, natigilan ako nang biglang may lumitaw na fireworks sa langit. Napaawang ang labi ko habang nakatitig sa maingay na kalangitan. Ayokong isipin na siya ang may gawa no’n… pero nakatingin siya sa ’kin ngayon na tila ba hinihintay n’ya ang reaksyon ko.

Maya maya pa, natigilan naman ako nang mapansing may apat na malalaking yacht ang papalapit sa pwesto namin. Napaawang ang labi ko nang sunod sunod na humilera iyon sa tapat ng yacht na sinasakyan namin ni Xanthos ngunit ang ikinagulat ko ay ang mga tao na nakasakay sa yacht na ’yon. May hawak silang mga sky lantern saka sabay sabay na inangat ’yon at pinalipad. Mas lalo akong nagulat nang makita ang mga kaibigan namin, sina Denise, Abi, sina Cad, at ang mga kasama ni Xanthos sa organisasyon nila. Pati ang kambal ay nandoon din at nagtatatalon.

Umilaw ang tila Christmas lights na nakapalibot sa bawat yacht at doon ko lang nakita ang nakasulat sa apat na yate.

Kiara…

Will you

marry

me?

Napatakip ako sa bibig ko kasabay bg tuluyang pag-alpas ng mga luha mula sa mga mata ko. Ang lakas ng kabog ng dibdib ko habang tila hindi pa rin makapaniwala sa mga nakikita ko ngayon. Nanlalamig ang mga kamay ko at nanginginig din ang mga tuhod ko. Tuloy tuloy ako sa pagluha na halos hindi ko na makita ang paligid.

Hinawakan ni Xanthos ang kamay ko. Natigilan ako nang dahan dahan siyang lumuhod sa harapan ko habang hindi maalis ang titig sa lumuluhang mukha ko. Narinig ko ang malakas na hiyawan ng mga tao sa apat na yate nang makitang lumuhod si Xanthos.

Kinuha ni Xanthos ang maliit na box mula sa bulsa ng blazer n’ya at binuksan ’yon. Nakita ko ang makinang na singsing na nasa loob no’n.

“You can say no if you’re still not ready for this or if everything’s too fast for you… I can wait for you even if it takes forever, someone like you is always worth the wait. Married or not, I will do everything to make you happy. I will cherish every moments that we will have together with our kids. I will love you more than myself for the rest of my life… I will give you the love that someone like you deserve… At the end of the day, my words right now are just words and it can’t do anything… I’ll just show it to you, how much I love you. I will show it to you everyday, endlessly, without boundaries… Araw-araw kitang mamahalin, Kiara North… walang sawa, hanggang dulo… palagi kitang mamahalin.” Pasimpleng pinahid ni Xanthos ang luhang tumakas mula sa mga mata n’ya. “I love you so much, baby. Mahal na mahal kita.”

Hindi ko na napigilan ang muling pag-alpas ng masasaganang luha mula sa mga mata ko habang ninanamnam ko ang bawat salitang sinasabi n’ya. Pakiramdam ko nasa loob ako ng isang napakagandang panaginip… pero ang init ng kamay ni Xanthos na nakahawak sa akin ang nagpapatunay na totoo ang lahat… totoong nangyayari ang lahat ng ’to.

Agad akong yumuko at sinugod siya ng yakap. Napahagulgol ako ng iyak at mas hinigpitan ang yakap sa kanya.

Mas lalong lumakas ang hiyawan ng mga tao nang makitang niyakap ko si Xanthos.

“M-Magpapakasal ako sa ’yo kahit kailan mo gusto, Xanthos… kahit ngayon pa mismo… Mahal na mahal din kita. Mahal na mahal kita, Xanthos,” naluhang sambit ko habang nakayakap sa kanya.

Natigilan si Xanthos at bahagyang dumistansya sa akin. Napangiti ako nang makitang tuluyan na siyang napaluha habang nakatitig sa ’kin.

Agad siyang tumayo nang mahimasmasan at niyakap ako nang mahigpit. Napangiti na lang ako at ginantihan ang mainit na yakap n’ya. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang bahagyang panginginig n’ya pati na rin ang malakas na tibok ng puso n’ya.

Kumalas din agad siya sa pagkakayakap sa ’kin. Nanginginig ang mga kamay na kinuha n’ya ang singsing sa box at akmang isusuot sa akin ang singsing pero hindi n’ya malusot-lusot ang singsing dahil sa panginginig ng kamay n’ya.

“Damn,” mariing mura n’ya.

Natawa na lang ako at kinuha ang singsing mula sa kanya at ako na mismo ang nagsuot no’n sa sarili ko.

Muli ko siyang sinugod ng yakap. Naramdaman kong napangiti siya saka gumanti rin nang mahigpit na yakap sa ’kin.

“I can’t wait to be your husband… I love you so much, Kiara.”

I smiled and closed my eyes… Me too, I can’t wait to be his wife.

LAST CHAPTER

Xanthos Dela Paz Archante

I don’t know when I realized that I love Kiara. I know to myself that I love her even before I realized it. When did I fall in love with her? Is it when she hugged me and told me how sorry she was about everything that happened to me? Is it when I saw her giving birth to our children?

Who am I kidding? I already love her even before those moments. I just don’t know when because maybe, I was still too in denial that time.

I know I fell in love with her the moment I realized she’s different from Kairo and Aldovino North. I fell in love with the moment she gave me her pure and sweet smile. I fell in love with her the moment I saw how beautiful she is inside… I just fell in love about everything about her. Every part of her is lovable, even the smallest things.

“Hey, baby… Wake up.” I gently pinched Kiara’s nose to wake her up.

“Hmm…” She just groaned and hugged me tighter. “Later.”

Ginantihan ko siya ng yakap. “Baby, you have to wake up now. Pupunta pa kayo ng kambal kay Kairo.”

Today, they will visit Kairo North at his house. They always visit him at least once a week. I’ve got no problem with it. I still can’t forgive him but he’s still the grandfather of my kids.

“Ayoko ng umalis, maglambingan na lang tayo maghapon,” she said and nuzzled on my neck.

“Baby, your offer is tempting but you really have to go. The kids are looking forward to meet him again. Mamayang gabi na lang tayo,” nakangising sabi ko saka hinaplos ang buhok n’ya.

Wala ng nagawa si Kiara kundi bumangon at maligo. I just went to the kitchen to cook breakfast for them. I’m always busy at work but I still find time to cook for my wife and my kids. They love the food I cook so I will always find time to cook for them.

“Papa! Good morning po!”

I smiled when Xiana and Xevan ran to my direction and hugged my waist. I carried them both and planted small kisses all over their face. My heart leaped with joy when I heard their laughter.

Ipinaghain ko na sila pagdating ni Kiara.

“Papa, bakit po always kang hindi nasama kapag pinupuntahan namin si Lolo?”

I looked at Kiara when Xiana suddenly ask that. She always asks everything she’s curious about, so I should have prepared for this sooner. I sighed and held Kiara’s hand under the table.

“Baby, you still won’t understand because you’re still young… but Lolo did something bad to your Papa. That’s the reason why your father doesn’t want to see him,” Kiara explained and smiled at the kids.

Xiana stared at us. I know that look, she’s thinking what she’s gonna say or do about it.

“Okay po. Maybe it was a really serious matter. Sorry for asking, Papa,” Xiana said and stood up. Lumapit siya sa ’kin at niyakap ako.

I smiled and caressed her hair. “Well, sorry too for not explaining it to you clearly.”

I know our setup is not easy to explain to them anyway… But I love how understanding our kids are. Xianariah really took after Kiara. Xiana had her boundless understanding.

“Kiara, sorry if I still won’t be able to come with you and the kids to see him,” I said and held her hand.

Kiara smiled at me and kissed my lips. “How many times do I have to tell you that it’s fine? I’m not forcing you to forgive him if you’re still not ready for it. Stop apologizing for it, Xanthos. I understand… Okay?” she asked and hugged my waist.

I smiled and nodded. I’m so lucky to have an amazing woman like her in my life… someone like me… someone like me who don’t deserve peace of mind and this kind of happiness. I’m everyday thankful to have her and our kids in my life. This is too much, this is more than what I deserve.

“Stop bothering me. I have to finish these as early as possible,” I said and threw the paper weight to Cad but he immediately catched it.

“Wow, pare… Ano ba’ng meron today?” Cad asked and sat on the chair in front of my table.

“We will have a family picnic, so stop bothering me.” I glared at him.

Denise is not my secretary anymore so it’s harder for me to finish my work papers earlier. Denise knows what to do more than anyone, but she needs to have a life of her own too. Until now, I still couldn’t find a suitable secretary. I want a male secretary because I always have problems with female secretary. Si Denise lang talaga ang babaeng secretary na hindi ko tinanggal sa trabaho.

“By the way, how’s the mission last time?” I asked and glanced at Cad.

“Ayun, ayos naman. Muntik ng sumabit pero pumasok sa eksena si Papi Zak. Scam talaga ’yon, paalis alis pa ng feroci pero hindi rin naman makatiis. Puta parang siya pa rin leader, e,” napapailing na sabi ni Cad.

I just chuckled and shook my head. “It’s because you always fuck things up,” I teased him.

“Hoy, mag-ingat ka sa pananalita mo, pare. Ako ang best strategist ng feroci, hindi lang halata sa gwapong mukha ko.” Napaismid si Cad.

Well, it’s true. Cad is one of the best strategist in feroci aside from Draxon and Fiero. He just doesn’t look like it but Cad is actually clever. Feroci wouldn’t survive without his reckless ideas and strategies.

“I’m done… By the way, Cad, please find me a male secretary. I want someone as efficient as Denise,” I said and stood up. I wore my blazer and fixed my table.

“Medyo mahihirapan tayo diyan, pare,” napapailing na sabi ni Cad.

“I’ll pay you for it,” I immediately said.

“Piece of cake, pare. Sobrang dali lang ng pinapagawa mo, legit,” napapatangong sabi ni Cad.

Napailing na lang ako at agad na lumabas ng office. I have to go home now and cook something for our picnic. I still have to bake cookies for my kids because they requested it yesterday.

I immediately went home after buying groceries. They’re still not home when I got there which is a good thing. I still have time to cook.

Saktong umuwi na sina Kiara pagkatapos kong magluto. I smiled when I saw them. The kids immediately ran to my direction and hugged me. Kiara hugged me too and kissed my lips.

“Papa, did you bake cookies for us?” Xiana asked while hugging me.

I laughed and pinched her cheeks. “Of course, my princess.”

“Yehey!” nagtatatalon na sabi ni Xiana. Agad naman silang tumakbo papunta sa sarili nilang kwarto para kuhanin ang bag na hinanda nila sa picnic namin.

“They said perfect husband doesn’t exist… but what are you?” Kiara asked with a sweet smile on her face and hugged my nape.

“Hmm, maybe I’m trying to be a perfect husband because my wife is beyond perfect,” I said and wrapped my arms around her waist.

Kiara let out a refreshing laugh and gently smacked my chest. She rubbed her nose against mine and gave me a soft kiss on the lips… Damn, all the exhaustion I felt for this day had gone just like that. How is that even possible?

“Papa, I want a dinosaur tattoo when I grew up,” Xevan randomly said.

Natatawang napatingin si Kiara sa backseat para tingnan si Xevan.

“Why dinosaur though?” Kiara asked.

“Because dinosaurs are scary,” Xevan said and took a bite on his cookie. I just laughed and shook my head.

After a few minutes, we finally reached the park where we will have picnic together. Excited na bumaba ng kotse ang kambal dala ang bag nila. I immediately open the car door for Kiara and took the basket from the compartment.

There are also a lot of families and couples having a picnic here. The place is refreshing and has the perfect vibe for a picnic.

Inilatag ko na ang tela at inilapag ang basket do’n. Nagpaalam naman ang kambal na maglalaro sa malapit. Kami na lang ang naiwan ni Kiara na nakaupo rito.

“Come here, Xanthos. Humiga ka sa lap ko,” Kiara said and pulled me closer to her.

I obliged and rest my head on her lap. I just closed my eyes and let her carress my hair with her gentle hands.

This moment is just too good to be true. Kiara is just too good to be true. I’ve never done something good in my life to have someone like her… She still love and accepted me despite knowing what I did in the past and after all unjustifiable things I’d done to her… Kiara and our kids just made my life worth living for. I’m hopelessly in love with her.

I opened my eyes and stared at Kiara. She smiled at me and gently caressed my cheek.

“Kiara, have I told you that I’m loving you more in every second of our lives? I mean, I’m more in love with you now than one second ago… Is that even possible?”

Kiara laughed and smacked my chest.

“Mas lalo kang nagiging corny, ganyan ba kapag tumatanda na?” natatawang tanong n’ya.

Napabangon ako sa sinabi n’ya. “Hey, you’re being harsh, baby. I’m not that old,” I said and pinched her nose.

Kiara hugged my waist and kissed my cheek. “I know how much you love me, Xanthos. Araw-araw mong pinaparamdam sa ’kin,” she said and smiled at me.

“Well, you deserve to be loved that much. You actually deserve more, baby… Until now, I’m still thankful that God gave me a wonderful woman like you. God is really good for giving someone like me an amazing family even though I don’t deserve it. You just gave light to my life. You made me forget about my hatred that I kept inside my heart for years. You made my heart feel peace, you made me forget about my revenge that I lived for for almost all my life. You don’t know how much thankful I am to have you and our kids in my life. I will love you more every each day.” I took her hand and kissed it.

Kiara smiled at me and buried her face on my neck. “Bakit hanggang ngayon saulo mo pa rin ’yung wedding vow mo sa akin? Nakakapagtaka rin na kinikilig pa rin ako kahit halos araw-araw mo ’yang sinasabi sa ’kin.”

“Wait, is that my wedding vow? Damn, I didn’t even realize. I’m just saying what I always feel,” I said and chuckled.

Kiara bit her lower lip and kissed my lips. Tila wala na siyang pakialam sa makakakita. I just smiled and found myself kissing her back.

Kiara is like a forbidden fruit to me before. Out of all the woman in this world, loving her is what I consider the most forbidden… The number one rule I had before is not to love someone like her… But I just found myself chasing that forbidden love. I just found myself drawn in that forbidden love… and I never regret loving her. The love I have for her, the love I once considered a taboo and forbidden is now the most wonderful love that I will cherish forever.

• • • ~ ~ ~ * * *

Thank you Kiara Hilaga for letting me use your name. I love you 💛

Thank you for reading this story despite its flaws, errors, and loopholes. You’ve been with me on my writing journey and watched me improve in every story 🤧

Please leave a comment and let me know your thoughts about this story. I’ll read your comments and will surely appreciate it. Thank you, my elies. I love you all 💛

~ You can interact with me on my social media accounts ~

FACEBOOK ACCOUNT: Elyjindria Farthon

INSTAGRAM: elyjindria

TWITTER: elyjindria

Published on PSICOM!

You can now purchase/buy the copy of Chasing the Forbidden (SERIE FEROCI 3) at PSICOM ’s online stores (shopee , lazada, and tiktok shop) , and it will soon be available in bookstores nationwide!

Price: 325 php

416 pages

with 4 SPECIAL CHAPTERS!

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/e84aec0a14465f81f2238dcce89fdbe3ee8633e1/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f48356e626e77305a6933546857413d3d2d313338333834393333332e3138323534623465343461383730373937333631323735313230352e6a7067)               

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/73ddb642fa2492a3338821c5c236cc79ab9b8ade/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f527033384b4e79583353363532413d3d2d313338333834393333332e313832353462356533643835363765343831393636323338323336302e706e67)               

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/715bb14013b851e97480e4b7a718a2dfc9f7c8f5/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f4d4976465877664c366c6f5644513d3d2d313338333834393333332e313832353462383834383763653965313332323437353139323230382e6a7067)               

SPECIAL CHAPTERS SPOILERS:

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/368b43fd9d7097c0f8b56e94efefa1afd154cd76/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6144736d42635232326e374664773d3d2d313338333834393333332e313832353465356634663737316361663235393833313637343733352e6a7067)               

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/92d42bf17c632faa46cc9d938a2bf16920a6b1fd/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f4f74754877364d374865553473673d3d2d313338333834393333332e313832353465363064613639336162353430333236363232373230312e6a7067)               

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/ebcd7dfe7d028b5f474e193d8197f87ad7386be2/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6c5930734e795043614a553668673d3d2d313338333834393333332e313832353465363236313536383563653136363236313231363635392e6a7067)               

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/0530a9f04fa76dff3372f2628a7c269232037abd/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f794a32724f5378734b50767261513d3d2d313338333834393333332e313832353465363361633735336334623538353739383638383337392e6a7067)

NEXT

Caught and Conquered (SERIE FEROCI 4)

Nathalie Mariano is an unfortunate woman. Her family abandoned her when she was just a kid, she was forced to live with a group of thieves to survive. She became a thief for as long as she can remember, she can say that she’s already an expert in that field. Ashteroh Alexeev is a wealthy jewelry company owner who’s rumored to be a weak old man and he’s her new victim. But she regretted it afterward because he’s far from being a weak old man she expected.

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A/N: medyo light ’to kumpara sa story ni Xanthos, mas laptrip din kasi loka loka ’yung bida, lol. Hindi yata ’to mapanakit, parang kagat lang ng crocodile. Hehe.