Fire In Your Fears

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Fire In Your Fears

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Written by chamdreixx

To feel scared is normal but to live in it, it isn’t.

Nakakatakot magtiwala sa taong alam mong magkaiba ang mundong ginagalawan n’yo. Pero sumugal pa rin ako. That is life, taking risks for someone you loved. Trusting someone is easy. Promises should be actualized. But what will you do if he left you? Waiting for him alone in the darkness? Without knowing that he will never be coming back.

Is that what really happened or I am just blind by my passion?

What if I’m scared of the person I loved. Fear crept in me when I saw him firing a gun to the people who gave me life. It tore me into small pieces that gave my heart a reason to catch fire.

Darkness consumes me. Fear crept in me. And now the embers inside me begin to flame. That is the fire behind my fears. 

Should I let him enter my life again when he comes back?

If we’re meant for each other, destiny will find its way to bring us together again.

Fire In Your Fears

Elite Series #1

Disclaimer:

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters,

songs,

businesses, places, events, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

(

All rights reserved) No part of this story may be reproduced, modify and transmitted in any form or by any means. Please obtain permission.

Plagiarism is a crime.

Warning:

This story contains

typos

and

grammatical errors.

I’m writing this on my phone so forgive

my errors! T

hanks!

Simula

Simula

Fire

I’ve been keeping this fire since the day he betrayed me. I want to revenge on the people who break their promises and burned them into ashes.

The timid and extremely soft girl begun to change as the years passed. I never made myself to this, them…they made me into this.

“Ma’am Blair, tapos na po ang pinapagawa niyo. We already cut the wires and shut down the electric power system of the OV Hotel.” Anang tauhan kong si Denis mula sa kabilang linya.

I proudly looked at the building outside as the sky filled with darkness.

“Good. Make sure that no one will know about this. That you have done it clean and safe. If you had left a mess, I’ll turn you down. Are we clear?” I said, reprimanded.

“Yes, Ma’am. Copy,” he replied, then I ended our conversation.

Nakatingin ako ngayon sa laptop kong nakapatong sa table dito sa opisina, habang pinapanood kung paano’ng mag-panic ang mga tao sa loob ng bagong bukas na branch ng Oriental Ventura Hotel.

The whole place were in dark, shadows gone because the lights are off. ’Di magkamayaw sa kakalakad ang mga tao sa paligid. I can even clearly picture how people good at squealing each other earlier and how their states change into lost old in the dark.

Napangiti ako dahil naaayon ang lahat sa plano. Nagsisimula palang ako. I looked at my phone and dial Denis’s number. I smirked and it didn’t leave my lips anytime soon.

“Denis, proceed to the next step of our plan. The most exciting part of our plan,” sabi ko sa kabilang linya na tahimik lang na nakikinig.

“Denis are you there? Denis?” Tumigil ako sa pagsasalita at pinakinggan ang nasa kabilang linya. Shit. “Talk to me, whoever you are having this phone with.” My breath started to heave.

Where’s Denis? Bigla nalang nawala ang tawag sa kabilang linya at nanggagalaiti kong binagsak ang cellphone sa table.

Augh! Bakit hindi sumagot si Denis? Tinakasan na ba ako nito dahil hindi sapat ang perang natatanggap niya mula sa’kin? Pero imposible! Hindi niya ako pwedeng iwan sa ere sa panahong ganito ang sitwasyon. Matagal na ang pinagsamahan namin at ng aming pamilya, kaya imposible ’tong mga pinag-iisip ko.

Malakas ang kutob kong may kumuha nang kaniyang telepono, pero paano? He was trained and very professional. You can’t even notice him sneaked out through the window.

“He needs to stick to our plan or else lahat ng pinaghirapan ko ay masasayang,” I mumbled to myself, stressed out about what is going on.

Akala ko ay naayon na sa plano ang lahat. But maybe I failed this time.

Mabilis na naagaw ang atensyon ko ng laptop nang makita kong bumalik na ang kuryente sa hotel. What the hell. Bakit bumalik ang kuryente? How could this happen? No! This is not happening. Papasabugin ko pa ang tuktok ng building na iyon! I’m not yet done with all of this.

Nakakuyom ang aking mga kamay na nakapatong sa ibabaw ng lamesa. I gritted my teeth, my heart filled with anger, uneasy to tame. I can’t even control myself this time. I want to burst and kill them all.

Bakit ang bilis nilang nagawan nang paraan na maibalik ang kuryente? We’re not yet done. Nag-uumpisa palang ako at nalusutan agad nila ito? I don’t care if they are an elite family here in Asia or here in our country. I will not let them be happy. I will ruin them.

Where are you, Denis? Why is this all happening? Bakit ngayon pa pumalpak ’tong plano natin?

Bahagya naring naibsan ang takot sa mata ng mga tao. Habang ang iba naman ay nag-aasikaso sa iba pang mga nagpapanic. Employees of the hotel assisted them as my glace caught them relaxed when the light comes back.

And I saw a man standing near to the door where I put the only CCTV that could work during a blackout. And it’s only connected to my laptop.

I felt my anger fueled by this man’s view. He’s the reason for it all. It’s his family who made me a reason to end up doing things like this.

My eyes eyed him over the screen. I felt my brows furrowed than it’s usual.

Ace…

Unti-unting nawala ang inis na nararamdaman ko at napalitan nang matinding pagakamuhi. Pero hindi ko maintindihan ang kabang nabuhay sa aking dibdib habang nakatingin sa lalaking nakatayo at matiim na nakatitig sa CCTV.

He’s tall, taller than before. And his body became more massive and his gray eyes became darker. Maybe because of the camera but I know it’s not. I knew him…very well. I memorize every part of him back then. And I can say that he changed…a lot.

Naninikip ang dibdib ko na parang nahihirapan sa paghinga. Napatukod ako sa lamesa habang nakahawak sa parteng puso ng aking dibdib.

I will never forget this man…the man who broke my young heart. Who made damage in my life. The reason why my heart began to flame. I felt angry for what he did to me.

I trusted him. But he failed me. And it shatters me into million pieces every time I see him.

Bumagsak ang mga luha kong naipon sa aking mga mata. Nasasaktan ako’ng isipin na it’s been years…a damn freaking years ago and yet I’m still crying for him.

I shouldn’t be crying. Yes, I should not be. He’s not worthy of my tears. My tears are only for the people who have cared for and loved me. But now they are gone.

And he makes me a reason to show them the anger that I clasp for a long time. That I keep, even it burden and bugging me every single day of my life.

Sinarado ko ang aking laptop at agad na dinampot ito kasabay ng cellphone at tinawagan ko si Denis. I can’t take watching him see how my plan ceased to function. He must be celebrating by now.

The phone keeps on ringing and ended unattended. This is frustrating! I stood up and stop trying to call him.

Nagmamadali akong lumabas ng opisina at kinakabahan na ako kung bakit hindi ko makontak si Denis, at kung bakit unattended ang cellphone nito. I hope that at least he’s safe.

Pumasok na ako sa elevator at pinindot ang ground floor. Quarter to ten PM na ngayon at hindi na nangyari ang pinaplano ko. Paniguradong pinapaimbestigahan na nila ngayon ang nangyari sa electric power supply ng hotel. Kung bakit bigla nalang nag-blackout.

Did they find out the bombs? Bakit hindi napasabog nila Denis ’yon?

Bumukas ang elevator at naglakad ako palabas. Tunog lamang ng stilettos ko ang maririnig sa buong ground floor. Madilim narin ang paligid dahil nakauwi na ang mga empleyado.

Maarte akong naglakad papunta sa glass door palabas ng building nang mapansin kong walang nagbabantay na guards sa labas.

“Where on earth the guards are?” nagtatakang tanong ko sa aking sarili.

Tinawagan ko ang aking secretary at agad naman nitong sinagot.

“Good evening, Ms. Cortez.” aniya, namamaos pa ang boses nito, mukhang naistorbo ko ang mahimbing nitong pagtulog.

“Where are the guards here on the ground floor? Bakit wala sila rito?” I asked her curiously like she knew where they are.

“Maybe they are doing rounds po in every floor ma’am.”

“But at least one of them should guard the ground floor.” I hinted.

“Yes po, Miss Cortez, I’ll call now the head of security to inform them.” nagmamadaling anito.

“Good,” sabi ko at saka ibinaba ang tawag.

I went out of the building to went home immediately. They can track where my CCTV is connected and I remove all the traces they can be found. But for safety, I gotta go home now.

Tumingala ako sa madilim na kalangitan at napansin na walang mga bituin. Ang malas ng araw na ’to. Our mission was failed. And I don’t know how it happens. Marami na kaming nagawang ganito and it all successful at ngayon lang ito nangyari, ang pumalpak.

I walk towards my car and I immediately turn my gaze to a car with a rich-like texture parked in beside my car. Nag-iisa lang ang sasakyan ko sa parking lot ngunit nagtaka ako na may katabi ito.

Nagtaka ako nang bumakas ang van at lumabas ang tatlong kalalakihan na malaki ang pangangatawan. Nakatakip ang kanilang mga mukha dahilan para hindi ko sila makikilala.

Kinakabahan akong napatitig sa mga ito. Humakbang ako paatras para pumasok na sa loob ng aking sasakyan ngunit masyadong naging mabilis ang naging kilos ng mga kalalakihang nasa harap ko na ngayon.

“Anong kailangan n’yo?” My voice was in a stoic stance but it shivered right now.

Hinawakan nila ako at pilit ko namang binabawi ang kamay ko mula sa pagkakahawak nila sa akin. “Bitiwan n’yo ako! What the– I said let go off my hands!” I yelled, scared of what they’ll gonna do to me.

Akmang sisigaw pa sana ako nang biglang tinakpan ng isa sa kanila ng panyo ang ilong at bibig ko. Hindi ako makahinga dahil sa ginawang pagtakip nito. Hinawakan ng isa sa kanila ang mga paa ko habang ang isang may hawak ng panyo ay hawak ang dalawa kong kamay pahaltak patalikod. Pinagtulungan nila akong buhatin pasakay sa loob ng van habang patuloy ako sa pagpiglas.

Nakaramdam ako ng pagkahilo at panghihina sa hindi ko malamang dahilan. Pinilit kong sumigaw ngunit walang lumalabas sa bibig ko. Mabilis na nanghina ang katawan ko.

Ano ba ang nangyayari? Sino sila? At bakit nila ako kinuha? Is this kidnapping for ransom? Oh God, this isn’t happening.

I heard them closed the door. They tied my hand and wrapped my mouth with tape. I lost my balance and fell on my sit.

Nanghihina kong tiningnan sila pero hindi ko na talaga kaya. Parang mahuhulog na ang katawan ko sa antok at pagod kakasigaw at kakapiglas sa hawak nila sakin kanina.

“Boss, nakuha na namin siya. Yeah, we’re on our way.” Anang lalaking hindi ko na makita dahil nakapikit na ang aking mga mata, dala ng pagkahilo.

“Let’s go. Bago pa mainip si boss at baka malintikan pa tayo.” sabad ng kasamahan niya.

Sinong boss? Whoever he is, I’ll make sure he’ll regret that he did this. I tried to keep my sanity but I’m mentally and physically drained. I felt dizziness that made me lost my consciousness. Damn it.

Kabanata 1

Kabanata 1

Leave

“Tayo na. Let’s leave her alone here.” I heard them spoke.

Marahan kong iminulat ang aking mga mata nang maramdamang nananakit ang aking katawan. My eyes were adjusting from the light when the sunlight strikes my eyes. I groaned. Mariin akong napapikit at nagulat nang bigla kong maalala ang nangyari.

They kidnapped me. And I don’t know where I am right now. Where the hell I am right now?

Napatingin ako sa paligid. I’m in a room. An extravagant and luxurious room. Tumayo ako mula sa pagkakahiga at namalayang wala na palang tali ang aking mga kamay at wala naring takip ang aking bibig.

I look up to see the ceiling and I was surprised to see this very nice chandelier. Then I look straight to see the walls and I was not surprised to see that it’s made of marble.

A dramatic marble accent that suits this kinda big room. I turn around and look at the curtain. Its color gray that covered something from behind. There comes the beam of light that struck me once.

Naglakad ako patungo sa gawing ’yon. I pulled off the curtain and I instantly covered my eyes as the powerful light shone on me. Marahan kong inalis ang kamay na nakatakip sa aking mga mata. Oh, God! This place is so pleasant. Namamangha ako sa aking nakikita.

Tanaw na tanaw ko mula rito ang ganda ng karagatan. As the sunlight reflects the water makes it more beautiful. The tall palm trees and the row of sun loungers underneath. Tranquility defines it all.

Napaisip ako kung nasaan ako ngayon base sa paligid ko. It looks like a beach. I’m on an island. But what am I doing here? I thought they kidnap me for ransom but here I am on a beautiful beach.

But I should always expect the worst in my case. I don’t even know who’s behind this setup. Hindi ako makakapante hangga’t hindi ako nakakaalis sa lugar na ’to.

Agad akong napabaling sa pinto nang bumukas ito. Tumalim ang aking tingin nang makita ang tatlong kalalakihan na kumidnap sa akin. They still wearing their mask kaya hindi ko parin sila matignan ng maayos.

Nakahilera silang tatlong humarap sa akin. Lalapit na sana ako sa kanila at handa ng pagsusuntukin nang matigilan ako nang makita ang huling pumasok.

Oh my god… Hindi ko napigilang manlaki ang aking dalawang mata. Nasapo ko ang aking bibig dahil sa gulat nang makita ang lalaking nasa harap ko ngayon. So he’s the mastermind of this all.

I stand straight to cover up the struggling feeling that I felt. Inalis ko ang kamay kong nasa aking bibig. Then I look into his eyes. Nalilito kung ano ba ang nangyayari.

I was standing at the end of the bed while they are all in the opening of the door, staring at me and observing every move I will make.

Naninikip ang dibdib ko dahil sa galit na nararamdaman nang makita ko siyang muli. He is staring at me languidly, his eyes were very dark as anger painted them.

Kaya naman ginawaran ko rin siya ng nakamamatay kong tingin. Kung nakakapatay lang ang pagtitig ng masama sa isang tao, paniguradong pinaglalamayan na ito ngayon.

I noticed his black button-down shirt and black pants sported with his black leather boots. He looks decent but the roughness remains. I smirked bitterly.

Tahimik ang paligid at walang nagtangkang magsalita ni isa man sa amin. Then I stepped forward to get a little closer to him. We are only a few inches away from each other. Matiim ko siyang tinitigan habang unti-unti nang namumuo ang luha sa aking mga mata.

His jaw clenched like he’s struggling to tame his temper. I never saw him blinked as he glared at me. Then, until I spoke.

“Are you now happy?” My voice shivered as I speak. I hardly tried to manage to sound tough but it turns out to be weak.

He sighed, then took a step towards me. “Do I look happy?” pilosopong sagot nito sa’kin. “Tell me if I looked like one.” He said in a very stern voice.

Peke akong tumawa at sabay patakbong lumapit sa kaniya nang bigla akong hawakan ng mga tauhan niya. What the hell!

“Let me go! You bastards remove your hands off me!” naiiritang sigaw ko sa dalawang lalaking humahawak sa dalawang braso ko.

Then I look up to Ace, who’s intently watching me.

“How dare you do this to me! What’s all of this? Is this one of your hobbies now? Kidnapping someone who is not worthy? I’m nothing Ace! I’m nothing compared to you! And you get nothing to me.” Nanggagalaiti kong sigaw sa kaniya.

He gazes at me from head to toes. Tracing every part of me. I felt cold in the way he stares at me. As if he was insulting me that way. Af if he’s disgusted.

“I know you aren’t nothing and we both know it.” taas noo niyang ibinalik muli ang tingin sa aking mga mata.

“Don’t act like you didn’t do anything. You’re done with messing me around. I know you’re the one behind it all and I let you. I let you do that before, but now it’s done. You are doing this too much, Blair. So I won’t let you get what you want now. Dahil maraming tao ang madadamay sa pinaplano mong pagsabog.” His baritone voice thundered. Hindi man siya sumisigaw pero ramdam ko ang galit niya sa bawat diin ng salitang binibitiwan niya. He’s mad at me and I know I’m at fault.

I swallowed hard. His eyes looked so dark when he’s angry. I couldn’t help but look away from his glares as if he were eating my whole being now. I’m like a kitten scared of the lion for doing something wrong.

But that doesn’t change my outrage. I’m still mad for what he did to me, to my family. The anger inside me will never easily go away. It’s like a part of me, living in it. Dala dala ko na ito simula nung niloko n’ya ako at sa tingin ko ay hindi na ito mababago.

Napasinghap ako at mataman s’yang tinitigan. “Let me go now. Tutal hindi naman natuloy ang pagsabog, wala naring saysay pa ang mga ito.” kalmado kong sinabi pero sa loob loob ko ay kumukulo na ang dugo ko.

He smirks without any humor in it like he’s pissing me off, which makes me more irritated.

“No. You will be staying here for a couple of days. Dahil hindi ko hahayaang makapanakit ka ng ibang tao.” He uttered, eyes dagging me.

“What? Are you for real? Did you kidnap me to stay here? You want me jailed on this island and do nothing? And why is that? It’s its bullshit!” I exclaimed, furious at what he said.

He rolled his fist. He’s still mad as I am too. His jaw clenched and brows furrowed, eyes glistening with raw anger. “I’m captivating you, so whether you like it or not…you can do nothing,” he said in a dismissive tone.

Tinalikuran n’ya ako at walang sabing lumabas nang silid. Binitiwan narin ako ng dalawang tauhan n’ya. Lumabas silang lahat at iniwan akong mag-isa.

I let a frustrating heavy sigh, brushed my head with my two hands as I heard them locked the door. Parit-parito ang lakad ko habang nahihibang sa kaiisip kung paanong makakaalis sa lugar na ito.

I sat on the floor and tears flowed down my cheeks when nothing runs on my mind. I can’t think properly in these circumstances.

What now? Hindi naman ako makahingi ng saklolo kasi wala sa akin ang cellphone ko. And I can’t even shout because that’s for sure, no one will hear me. Nilibot ko ang aking paningin sa loob ng silid. Naghahanap ng pwedeng madaanan palabas. Ano ba’ng pinaplano n’ya? What is he really wants?

Why is he doing this? We are not even, so this is his way of vengeance? I need to get out of here as soon as I can. Marami pa akong dapat na asikasuhin. Damn it!

If I only have a way to escape here I will, but I know this house is fully guarded and secured. If only someone can help me to escape…Denis! Yes, Denis is the key!

He possibly currently finding my whereabouts. He’s my only chance to get away from here. Hindi dapat ako mawalan ng pag-asa. Makakaalis din ako dito at hindi ko hahayaang makalapit silang muli sa’kin. Over my dead body.

I wiped my tears as I rise with hope. Tumayo ako mula sa pagkakaupo sa sahig. Nabuhayan nang loob at tiningnan ang buong paligid kung posible bang may magamit ako para sa pagtakas.

Gulat akong napabaling sa bumukas na pintuan at pumasok ang isa sa mga tauhan ni Ace. He was holding a tray of food.

“Kumain ka na, Ms. Cortez.” aniya at tinalikuran agad ako.

I rolled my eyes, annoyed. I do admit that I feel nauseate towards his treatment. He shouldn’t deal with me this way, mas lalo lang n’yang pinapalala ang lahat.

Hindi nalang ako nagsalita at nanahimik na parang walang narinig. Nilapitan ko ang pagkaing nakalapag sa table malapit sa akin. Kumain ako dahil sa gutom na nararamdaman ko. I will need this food to give me energy at wala akong oras para mag-inarte.

Tumingin akong muli sa glass wall na natatakpan nang kurtina. Hinawi ko ’yon kanina at nakita ang nasa labas. Maganda ang lugar na ito. At enggrande rin ang silid na inuukupahan ko.

Ano pa ba’ng aasahan ko? Halos lahat yata ng bagay sa loob ng kuwarto na ito ay sobra sobra ang halaga. But I don’t want this kind of life kung ang taong makakasama mo naman ay isang masamang tao.

Tumayo ako at tinungo ang bathroom, I need to clean myself. Hindi na ako nagulat nang makita ang isang large bathtub na nakaharap na naman sa isang glass wall na tinatakpan nang kurtina.

Napakaganda ng disenyo ng bathroom na ito. Maski ang shower at ang sink nito ay may nagkikintabang kulay pilak.

I discarded my mind from being amazed at what luxury stuffs this room has.

Nilagyan ko nang tubig ang tub at ng mangalahati na ito ay nilagyan ko nang sabon. It’s an almond-coconut-scented bath that makes me feel so relaxed.

Hinubad ko ang suot kong dress at itinira ang lingerie ko. Nilubog ko ang aking katawan sa tubig at dinama ang ginhawa na dulot nito sa’kin. Ipinikit ko ang aking mga mata at ninamnam ang panandaliang kapayapaan.

I feel at peace because of the warmth of this tub.

Nang namalayan kong halos kalahating oras na akong nakababad ay umahon na ako. I went to the sink and crouched to get a towel in the cabinet. Tinuyo ko ang sarili at sinuot ang roba bago lumabas.

I went to the closet and I was in awe. Namamanghang tinignan ko ang loob nito. Nandito lahat ng kailangan ko mula undergarments at iba’t ibang uri ng damit.

Kinuha ko ang isang simpleng sleeveless white dress na nakita ko at ’yon ang piniling isuot. Pagkatapos mag bihis ay nilapitan ko naman ang vanity at nakitang may mga kagamitang pambabae rin doon.

Mga makeup na branded. I winced at that. Did they really kidnap me? Kasi pakiramdam ko hindi. Dahil lahat ng kailangan ko ay nandito sa loob ng kwartong ito. ’Di nga lang ako maaaring lumabas.

But these things are vulnerable to what I want. Does he think that he can tame me by having these freaking luxurious matters? He’s wrong. He can’t buy us again, never again.

I blew dry my hair and looked at myself in the mirror. May kumatok sa pintuan at bumukas ’yon pero hindi ko tinapunan ng tingin dahil alam kong ang mga tauhan na naman niya ’yon.

But unexpectedly, I raised my brow when I saw his reflection in the mirror. I intently glared at him back.

“Come with me downstairs and don’t you even try to escape. Wala kang kawala dito kaya wag ka ng magtangka pang tumakas.” malamig na boses nitong sabi.

I turn around and face him.

“Hanggang kailan mo ba akong balak ikulong dito? Bakit ayaw mo nalang akong hayaan-” he cut me off.

“Hahayaan lang kita sa oras na alam kong hindi mo na ipapahamak ang sarili mo.” aniya at tinalikuran na ako.

“The hell your words burn into ashes. I won’t let myself hear another one from it. You want to end it, right? Then let’s end it now. Freed me…” I uttered in prospect as I stood from my sit and neared over him. He stopped and stayed still but turn around to face me.

I saw his menacing eyes when I glimpsed at him seducingly. He licked his lower lips, then I muttered.

“You want me to stop doing things that can ruin you, is that it? Then I’ll stop, pakawalan mo ako kung ganon.” I demanded.

“Stop me with your spell, I’m not an idiot.” He forewarned, at nagmartya palabas ng silid.

Isang marahas na buntong-hininga ang aking pinakawalan sa sobrang pagka-inis na nararamdaman ko sa kan’ya. I rolled my eyes in so much irritation for him.

Lumabas ako ng silid at agad s’yang nakita na kausap ang isa sa mga tauhan n’yang umaaligid sa aking kuwarto, nagbabantay. Walang takip ang mukha ng mga tauhan niyang ito, ’di gaya ng kumuha sa akin kagabi.

He looked at my way when he noticed my presence. Tinignan ko siya ng may galit ang mga mata. I saw him sighed before he walked downstairs, I stalked him as the bodyguards are roaming around me.

My view caught by this vintage modern house as I walked downstairs.

Namamangha paring inilibot ko ang paningin sa bawat sulok na madaanan ng aking mga mata. So expensive and looks so luxurious. Everything here is made of silver or gold. From the railing of the stairs. From the chandelier that hanging on the ceiling. It does not look like a house it’s a mansion.

The vase and the paintings on the wall make it more accurate. Napatigil ako sa pagtingin sa mga nakakamanghang bagay nang makita ko si Ace na nakahinto sa tapat ko at mataman lang akong tinitingnan. Binaling ko ang tingin ko sa iba at tumikhim.

Agad ko lang siyang sinundan ng tingin nang tulyan itong maglakad paalis.

“Where are you going?” I asked that made him stop.

“The bodyguards will hunt you down whenever you attempt to escape. The place is fully guarded, so is you. Kaya kung ako sa’yo, mananatili lang ako sa kwarto, dahil wala ka ng kawala pa.” Anito.

“Paulit-ulit,” I murmured in so much annoyance.

“What did you say?” He asked sternly, pretending like he never heard.

“You said it more than twice, Ace. As if I’m terrified by your guards.” I hinted, hostile.

Inalis niya ang tingin sa’kin at umalis na siya kasunod ng iba pang mga bodyguards niya. Tinanaw ko nalang siya palabas ng pinto. Ano namang gagawin nila sa’kin dito? Nasaan ka na ba kasi Denis?

Kailangan kong gumawa ng paraan habang wala ka, Ace. I’ll make sure you tremendously let me go after this. I smiled evilly as I glimpsed at his built walking outside the door.

Kabanata 2

Kabanata 2

Past

Nakatanaw ako sa papalubog na haring araw ngayon habang dinadama ang haplos ng maalat na hangin sa aking balat. Kaninang tanghali pa nang umalis si Ace at naiwan ako kasama ang mga guard na iniwan niya sa’kin para magbantay.

They have eyed me every time I went out of my room. In every part of the house I am going to, they were also there to watch over me, observing every move I will make.

I lost my eagerness to escape this place. Except that I can’t help myself rather than keeping my pride and ego. I also have nothing to ride here on this island that can help my way out of here. No boats, either speed boats or any kind of watercraft.

Wala nga talaga akong takas dahil bantay sarado pa ako ng mga bodyguards n’ya.

Nakaupo ako ngayon sa isa sa mga sun lounger dito sa beachfront. Pagkatapos kong mapagod sa maghapon kakaisip ng posibleng paraan para makaalis ako rito sa isla ay napagpasyahan kong mamahinga nalang at pagmasdan ang magandang tanawin.

I was leaning and my eyes were fixed at the beautiful sunset.

Ang gandang pagmasdan ng kalangitan na kulay kahel. Ang mga ibong malayang nagsisiliparan patungo sa lugar kung sa’n man nila naisin.

Malapit ng mag-agaw dilim at nakikita ko na ang unti-unting paglubog ng haring araw. Payapa ang dagat at tama lang ang hampas ng mga alon. Hindi gaanong malakas kaya masarap pakinggan ang nililikhang tunog nito.

I never thought I will going to love to watch the sunset because I’m never fond of watching the beautiful end of my day. My life before is so amazing and peaceful like it never gonna end. Like everything that happens will remain forever.

Our family is happy and contended. We have everything. They provide everything and anything for me. They love me and I love them so much too. They taught me a lot of things. They comfort me when I’m sad. Took care of me every time I feel sick.

But then nothing lasts forever.

Everything has its end.

Until he came into my life. Like he’s another bonus to my happy life. But then I’m wrong. That’s where I started to love watching the sunset.

Sunset tells that everything in this world ends.

But we never know if our ends will be good or bad because that’s how sunsets work for me.

Marahan kong ipinikit ang aking dalawang mata kasabay nang paglubog ng araw. Gaya ng pagsakop ng dilim sa liwanag na namamayani sa kalangitan, binalot din ng dilim ang aking paningin kasabay ng pagbabalik tanaw sa aking nakaraan.

“Mom, sa’n po tayo pupunta?” tanong ko kay mommy habang hinihintay s’yang matapos sa pag-aayos ng sarili.

I am watching her reflection in the mirror as she puts her makeup on.

Nakabihis na ako ngayon ng isang simpleng dress at naayos narin ni mama ang pagkakatali sa aking buhok.

“We’re going to the party of Madame Helena, Blair. They invited us because we’re one of their stockholders.” My mom answered me with a glint in her eyes.

“Madame Helena Victoria Ventura, Mom? The wife of the owner of Ventura Hotels and Real Estates?” namamanghang tanong ko pang muli rito.

She glances at me from the mirror of her vanity then smiled at me warmingly.

“Yes, sweety. Kaya let’s go and call your dad now. Baka ma-late pa tayo ng dating, nakakahiya. It’s a grand birthday celebration that’s for sure.” Aniya at sabay na kaming lumabas ng kwarto nila ni Dad.

Bumaba na kami ng hagdan at naabutan namin si Dad na naghihintay sa living room, prenteng nakaupo sa pang-isahang sofa habang hawak ang susi ng aming sasakyan.

He then noticed our presence, his eyes lifted on our way walking downstairs.

Namamanghang sinuri n’ya ng tingin si Mommy mula ulo hanggang paa at saka nilapitan at ginawaran ng isang matamis na halik sa labi. Well, one of their sweet moments together. Kissing even I’m just here besides them. I rolled my eyes.

Dad lowered his gaze on me and give me a soft peck of a kiss on my forehead while caressing my hair.

“My little princess is really becoming a young lady, you’re so beautiful, sweety. You both to look stunning,” Dad complimented us then took notice of my mom just beside him. Giving us a genuine smile.

“Of course! My husband looks dashing as ever, kaya dapat lang na maging maganda rin kami ng anak mo.” Mom said proudly and they both laughed a bit. I chuckled as my shoulders shook then hugged them both.

“Look at our little princess, honey. Mukhang naglalambing.” Dad huskily muttered and softly caressed my hair.

“I’m not little anymore, Dad.” I reminded them because I’m twelve.

“Aww, my sweety is so adorable. I love you, Blair.” Mom’s voice soothed my ears then they both embraced me afterward.

“Fine, you’re still my little princess. We love you, Blair,” Dad uttered.

My lips grew wider, plastering a wide smile because of that, “I love you, mom. I love you dad. I love you both.” nakangiti ko silang tiningala habang sinasabi ko ’yon.

I used to this. Hugging them is normal. They raised me with full of love. No more, no less. And I appreciate all their efforts and hard work for me. For my future. I’m happy to have a family like this. I will be forever grateful to have them as my parents.

Naglakad na kami palabas ng bahay at sumakay na ng sasakyan. Nang makarating kami sa venue ay mabilis akong nakaramdam ng hiya.

Maraming tao at halos lahat ay nakatingin sa amin, maybe because we just arrive. May mga reporters ding nag-aabang sa bukana ng enggrandeng pintuan ng hall.

They asked my mom who created the gown our mother and I are wearing tonight when we got there, stuck in there when some interview my parents.

Nag flash ang ilang kamerang nakaharap sa amin ngayon habang nagsasalita si mom. Nagtago naman ako ng bahagya sa likuran n’ya. While Dad is on her side, waiting for mom to finish answering the reporters’ questions.

Umalis na rin kami at hindi na rin nagtagal doon. I was still behind Mom as we walked to the small stage where madame Helena was with her family.

I really never get used to the crowds. Hindi rin naman ito ang unang beses kong um-attend sa isang enggrandeng selebrasyon. Possibly because I just find people nosy and very curious about someone’s private life. I hate invaders, I guess.

Most of the guest are from elite families. While the others are share, stockholders, and the directors of their company. I noticed the gowns they are wearing, looking so luxurious and grand just like the occasion.

They talk to each other like it wasn’t their first meet. I adore them in the way of how they communicate with each other. It’s as if they don’t run out of topic. I’ve never been a good conversationalist. Even socializing with people, I always failed.

Bumalik ang tingin ko sa aking harapan. Kinakabahang nasa likod ako ni mom habang nasa pila kami para batiin si madame Helena. Isang pamilya nalang ang nasa harapan namin at kami na ang susunod na babati sa kan’ya.

At nang kami na ay napahinto at namanghang napatitig ako kay madame Helena na napakaganda ng gayak ngayon, nananatili pa rin akong nakatago sa likuran ni Mom. She looks more than stunning.

Her sophisticated looks that can intimidate others by just glancing at them. She wears a fancy gown that screaming how elegant she is. I couldn’t help but admire her beauty.

“Happy birthday, Madame Helena!” my Mom courageously greeted her at sabay segunda ng beso kay madame. Habang si Dad naman ay sunod na bumati rin at pagkatapos ay kinausap s’ya ni Don Denver, ang asawa ni madame Helena.

“Oh! Thank you for this, Beatrice!” Magiliw na sabi ni Madame Helena kay Mom nang maiabot nito ang regalo namin para sa kan’ya.

Abot tainga ang ngiti nito na nakatingin kay Mom nang biglang bumaba ang tingin nito sa’kin. Naglapat ang paningin naming dalawa at nginitian n’ya ako.

Nagulat man sa ginawa n’ya ay nagawa ko pa ring sinuklian siya ng tipid kong ngiti. At first, I thought she was hostile and snob because she looks so intimidating. And I’m wrong for judging her.

“Hello hija! Are you enjoying the party?” nakangiting tanong nito sa akin. Her voice was subtle and very welcoming.

When my Mom noticed that I’m she’s talking to ay hinawakan niya ang balikat ko.

“This is our daughter, Britney Clair Cortez. May pagka mahiyain din kasi itong anak ko. She’s not used to the crowds and scared to socialize with them.” Mom smiled at Madame Helena as she introduced me to her. I’m gripping my mom’s arms as she spoke.

Nginitian lang ako ng pagkatamis tamis ng ginang at hinawakan ang aking kamay. I was stunned by her sudden move. My mouth is half-open to gain some air to breathe.

Nakayukod pa ito sa akin mula sa kan’yang upuan upang maglebel ang aming mga paningin.

“It’s ok to be shy but don’t be scared hija. You are too beautiful so you should not be shame.” She smiled and calmly told me that.

Nakahinga ako ng maluwag nang bitiwan na n’ya ang aking kamay. I nodded in response to her words.

When she go back and sat on her chair, she took a glance at the man beside him. Napasulyap din ako ng tingin sa lalaking nakatitig din pala aking gawi. Nakaramdam ako ng hiya sa paraan ng pagtitig n’ya. He looks so formal with his black coat and tie. His eyes gaze at me in full of curiosity.

He’s kinda intimidating too. Kaya iniwas ko ang aking mga mata mula sa kan’yang gawi nang hindi ko na matagalan ang mga titig nito.

“This is my son, Ace Holden Ventura.” pakilala ni madame sa nag-iisang anak nila na kalaunan ay magmamana ng kumpanya.

I saw how serious he was when he offered his hand to my mom who instantly accepts it. And he turned his hand to me after mom left his, offering it for a handshake.

I just took a glance at his hand in the air, waiting for me to accept it. Then my eyes crawled into his eyes and saw how it made me shivers because of his seriousness.

“Blair, take his hand.” My mom whispered to my ears when she noticed me hesitantly stared in it.

Umatras ako at nagsumiksik muli sa likuran ng aking ina.

I saw how the man’s lips parted in awe when I didn’t accept his hand. He just withdraw it hastily and looked away.

Nang mag-angat ako ng tingin kay Madame Helena ay nakita ko kung paanong magulat ito sa ginawa ko pero kalaunan ay tumungo na lang ito.

“I apologize for my daughter, she’s just really that not adroit with getting knowing other people and at the same time make conversations with them.” I felt uncomfortable when my Mom apologizes to them for me. I mean we don’t owe them an apology just for not shaking his hand. That’s insane.

“Yes. That’s for the sure thing. Magugustuhan talaga nila ang mga bago mong designs lalo na at magaganda at unique ang mga ’yon.” Dinig kong ani ni Don Denver kay dad na nasa kabilang gilid lang din namin na nag-uusap.

“Thank you.” taos pusong pagpapasalamat ni Dad sa papuring sinabi sa kanya ng Don.

“No. Thank you. All your successes today are due to your hard work and talent.” Don flattery says to my dad.

My dad’s smile grew wider after that. Nangingiting nagtapikan ng balikat ang dalawa saka kami binalingan ni Dad. Nagpaalam na rin kami at hindi na nagtagal dahil may susunod pa sa amin na babati rin.

Pumunta na kami sa designated table na para sa amin. Habang nakaupo ako at naiserve na rin ang pagkain ay hindi pa rin ako mapakali sa mga taong katrabaho ni dad na tumutungo sa table namin. They introduced me to them at pilit lang ang ngiting naibibigay ko sa kanila.

I’m not used to the crowd. I am not accustomed to socializing with others. I’m a timid type of girl who only wants is silence. The reason why I rarely go to parties either even it’s my classmate’s birthday.

We go home after that night. The party was fun. There’s an orchestra that beautifies the event.

Iyon lang ata ang na-enjoy ko. Except sa kinakabahan ako dahil hindi talaga ako sanay makihalubilo sa maraming tao. Naiilang din ako sa isang tao na nasa maliit na entablado sa harapan. Who is looking at me intently for a while ago.

His gaze was dark. It’s not menacing or something, it’s just something that makes me feel little in his eyes. That makes my heart beat fast than usual. I may be terrified by his glare. I reasoned out to myself because it’s quite strange to me.

The feeling is really strange, I mean he’s totally a stranger to me but the presence he was giving me, makes my skin creep.

But I think he’s years older than me. He looks like my senior when I’ll be in grade seven in junior high this upcoming school year.

I didn’t pay much attention to him when some girls in my age approached him. Until we got home and I couldn’t help but think about the way he looked at me.

Kabanata 3

Kabanata 3

Familiar

Nagising ako kinabukasan nang maramdamang may nakadagan sa paanan ko. Ang damit pang eskwela na inihanda ni Manang Soling para sa akin.

Iminulat ko ang aking mata at hinawi ang kaunting buhok na nakatabon pa sa aking mukha.

Nang tingnan ko kung ano ba ang nasa paanan ko ay saka lang pumasok sa isipan ko iyon at napabalikwas ng bangon. Shocks! I forgot this is the first day of school. I don’t want to be late. It’s the first day of school for Pete’s sake.

Nagmamadaling bumangon ako sa pagkakahiga at agad na tinungo ang bathroom. Mas binilisan ko pa ang pagligo nang marinig kong bumukas ang pintuan ng kwarto ko.

“Blair! Are you done? Go downstairs after you finish everything at mag be-breakfast na tayo.” Rinig kong sigaw ni mom habang nagmamadaling binabanlawan ko ang sarili.

“Yes, mom! Coming!” sigaw ko para marinig niya ako.

“Make it fast Blair dahil naghihintay na rin ang driver mo sa ibaba. Anong oras na at ngayon ka palang naliligo.” mom said with a hint of dismay.

I sighed and then dried myself. I came out of the bathroom wearing my robe. I went to the vanity and there I had dry my hair. I hurriedly put on my uniform after drying my hair. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and began to sort myself out.

Napangiti ako nang makontento na sa ayos ng sarili. Konting pulbos lang at tap tap ng cheeks para mamula ng kaunti. I smiled and look at myself in awe.

I can tell my mom and I are alike. From my brown eyes and small pointed nose. A heart shape face with thin lips that I inherited from my dad.

When I heard a knock on my door I started to have checked on my things. And when I heard that it opens, I saw my mom approaching me with a smile on her lips.

“You’re so beautiful, Blair. Even with your school uniform.” She uttered softly then cupped my cheeks with her both smooth hands.

“Thanks, mom.” nahihiyang sagot ko sa kaniya.

Inalalayan ako nito sa pagtayo mula sa aking kama at pagkatapos ay kinuha ang bag ko at naglakad kami palabas ng aking silid.

“Are you excited to go to school? You’re now in high school so it’s gonna be a new environment for you.” tanong ni mommy habang naglalakad na kami pababa ng hagdan, patungo sa dining area.

“Just a bit mom. I’m more excited about the life of being a teenager in high school.” Nakangiting sabi ko habang palapit na ng dining table.

When I saw Dad reading a newspaper silently on his chair, I approached him to have kissed his cheek and greeted him with a good morning.

“Morning,” dad responds.

I smiled at him sweetly then I went to the chair beside his seat at doon naupo katapat si mom.

“Kumain ka na hija at baka mahuli ka sa iyong klase. Your driver is waiting for you outside. At siya na rin ang susundo sayo after your class.” Dad informed me then continue drinking his coffee.

I just nod my head as I agreed. Kahit sa pagkain ay binilisan ko para lang hindi ako mahuli sa klase. It’s nearly eight in the morning at nandito pa rin ako sa bahay.

At nang maubos ko na ang pagkain ko ay tumayo na ako at nagmamadaling naglakad palapit kay mom and dad para halikan sila sa pisngi at m0agpaalam na.

Nagmamadali akong naglakad palabas ng bahay namin.

“Dahan dahan lang hija at baka madulas ka sa bilis ng lakad mo!” mom shouted at me when I’m nearly out of the door.

Agad namang binuksan ni manong ang pinto sa backseat ng kotse para makapasok na agad ako.

Pakiramdam ko ay napakabagal ng takbo ng sasakyan namin kaya hindi ako mapakali.

“Uhm, manong pwede po bang pakibilisan ng kaunti? Malilate na po kasi ako.” sabi ko kay manong na agad rin namang tumalima sa utos ko.

Chineck ko ang gamit ko kung kumpleto na ba ito at dala ko ba ang lahat at walang naiwan kahit na isa. I’d even see the lunch box that my mom prepared for me. Napangiti ako niyon. Mom is so thoughtful in preparing this for me.

Namalayan ko nalang na nasa school na pala kami nang huminto ang sasakyan. Lumabas ako dala ang aking mga gamit.

Mabilis ang lakad at nagmamadali kong hinanap ang building ng Junior high. May mga tao pa naman sa mga corridors at mga halls kaya medyo nakampante ako.

When I exactly found my room I saw a teacher approaching and ready to go inside. So I hurriedly went in, just next to her.

I find and sat on a chair at the back.

As usual. Dahil first day of school ay more on introducing lang ang mga naganap. And they give to us the syllabus for this quarter.

Nang matapos ang dalawang subject ay may babaeng lumapit sa akin. At first, I didn’t expect that it was me she’s going into. Because I used to be alone back then.

This girl is pretty. Tall, fair skin and has an angelic face.

Halos lahat ng kaklase ko ay nakatingin sa akin habang nagliligpit ako ng gamit. Maybe they are used to seeing me alone. I don’t have friends when I was in primary. And I don’t intend to get one here in secondary.

“Hi! I’m Maica,” the girl who approached me introduce herself then lend her hand to me.

I was hesitant to take it at first dahil baka niloloko lang ako but then, I accept her hand.

“Hello. I’m B-Blaire.” nahihiyang pakilala ko sa kaniya. Ayaw ko man siyang kausapin dahil wala naman sa plano ko ang makipag kaibigan, pero may parte sa aking natutuwa na nilapitan niya ako at kinausap.

“Sa cafeteria ka ba pupunta after mong magligpit ng mga gamit mo?” she asked while I’m continued fixing my things.

Sinulyapan ko muna siya bago ibinalik muli ang tingin sa mga gamit kong tapos ko ng ligpitin.

“Ah. Yeah,” tipid kong sagot. Tinalikuran ko na siya dala ang lunch box ko nang mag salita siyang muli. I stopped walking.

“Sabay na tayo. Doon din naman ang punta ko.” pagprisinta niya.

Napahinto ako sa paglalakad saka siya binalingan at tipid na nginitian.

“Sure” tangi kong ani at nagpatuloy na sa paglalakad.

Sabay naming tinahak ang daan papuntang cafeteria. Tahimik lang ako at gano’n rin siya pero nang magsalita siyang muli ay binalingan ko siya ng tingin.

“Are you new in this school? I mean, gaya ko. Galing kasi ako ng ibang school at dito ko nalang napiling mag-aral ng high school.” She taled a bit.

“Hindi. Dito na ako nag-aaral since elementary.” sagot ko sa tanong niya.

“Ahh. Kaya pala mukhang pamilyar ka na dito.” aniya at napatango tango pa.

I just gave her a small smile before I looked away. I don’t think I remember having a friend back then. I can even say that this might be my first time to have someone walked with me in the same direction and having a short conversation before we got there.

Nang nasa tapat na kami ng cafeteria ay napahinto ako sa paglalakad nang makita ko ang grupo nila Elena. Kasama ang dalawang kaibigan niyang babae. Par-parehas ang paraan nito ng pagbitbit ng handbags nila. Nakasabit ito sa kaliwa nilang braso at maarteng naglakad patungo sa amin.

Naramdaman ko namang napahinto rin si Maica sa paglalakad at nagtatakang tumingin sa akin. I just glance at her then took my glance back towards Elena’s way.

“Hi there Blair! What a coincidence? Dito ka parin pala nag-aaral? I thought you transferred, sayang at hindi mo ginawa.” She mocked, at isang mapang-insultong ngiti at tingin ang ibinigay nito sa akin habang nakataas ang isang kilay.

Maarteng hinawi ng isa sa mga kaibigan niya ang sarili nitong buhok at saka nagsalita.

“Maybe it’s because she will miss us when she goes to another school,” she said sarcastically. I looked down.

At nag-angat lang ako ng mga mata para tapunan sila ng tingin at hindi nalang pansinin. I used to them insulting me in front of many. They never changed. They still humiliate me in front of the crowd. Yumuko ako at saka umalis nalang dahil ayaw ko ng gulo.

Naglakad ako para makaalis na sa kanila ngunit mukhang ayaw pa nila akong paalisin.

“Oh wait! Don’t you dare turn your back on me. Baka nakakalimutan mo. I am the granddaughter of the owner of this school.” nananakot ni Elena na sinabi, dahilan para mapaharap akong muli sa gawi nila.

“Good. Mabuti ng nagkakaliwanagan tayo rito. Don’t act like your the princess of this campus. Find your place, goner.” she said then laugh afterward with her friends.

Inunahan niya na kaming maglakad papasok ng cafeteria. At sinadya pa talaga nilang dumaan kung nasaan kami nakatayo kahit na maluwag naman ang daanan, dahilan para mabunggo niya ako sa balikat. Napaatras ako ng bahagya dahil sa ginawa niya.

“Who are they? Bakit ka nila ginanon? Tanong ni Maica na walang alam sa mga nangyayari nang tuluyan ng makapasok ang tatlo sa loob.

I took a glimpse at her then just smiled at her a bit, to make her feel like it’s nothing.

“Let’s just ignore them if you don’t want a fight with them,” I said then started walking to the entrance of the cafeteria.

I was looking for a seat when I got inside, and I immediately went to a vacant table near the seniors’ table.

When I got there I immediately take my seat and saw Maica ordering her food on the line, when I saw a familiar man standing behind her. Waiting for his turn to order his snacks.

Hindi na naalis doon ang mga mata ko at napako na ang paningin ko sa lalaking seryosong nakatayo sa pila mula sa likuran ni Maica.

His manly features caught my attention and his intimidating aura. My heart is pounding unconsciously as my eyes riveted at his way. I look at him in the eyes. And shock consumed me when our eyes met.

I immediately looked away. I turned my attention to others to get rid of the feeling of seeing him. What is he doing here? Maybe he is also studying here. But why am I seeing him only now? Why I didn’t see him before?

He’s the guy I met at the party. The only son of madame Helena and Don Denver.

Kinain ko nalang ang sandwich na baon ko habang nakayuko. Nahihiyang makita at baka mamukhaan niya ako.

Hindi ko naman maiwasang mamangha nang inaalala ang gabing nagkita kami sa party ni madame Helena.

He looked so casual that made him more manly that night. And now I’m seeing him wearing his uniform. He looks like a serious type of student. It suits him though.

Namumukod tangi ito sa mga kalalakihang kasing edad niya. Bukod sa mas higit na matangkad siya ay bakas na rin ang magandang hubog ng katawan nito.

It’s even visible in his uniform. From his broad shoulders down to his biceps and triceps. One glance and you knew that he worked hard for it.

“Hey! Bakit hindi mo ako hinintay na kumain?” nagtatampo kunwaring boses na sainabi ni Maica ng makalapit siya sa akin.

Napaangat ako ng tingin sa kaniya. “S-Sorry, nagugutom na kasi ako.” Ani ko at sinubo na ang natitirang piraso ng sandwich na hawak ko.

“You know what. There’s a super handsome guy behind my back kanina habang hinihintay ko yung order ko! And I heard one of his friends call him ’Ace.” masayang masayang aniya na parang kilig na kilig habang inaalala ang pangyayaring iyon kanina.

Tipid na nginitian ko lang siya habang umiinom sa isang bote ng orange juice ko.

“At saka hindi lang isa. Tatlo sila! Oh good god. May mga ganon pala talagang nag-eexist?” ngingiti ngiting aniya at hindi makapaniwala sa kagwapuhang taglay ng mga nilalang na nakita niya.

I chuckled a bit then look straight at my lunchbox na kakatapos ko lang isarado.

“Bakit parang wala ka man lang reaksyon diyan?” nagtatakang tanong niya sa akin. Na para bang palaisipan sa kaniya ang pagkatahimik ko.

I frozed. Simpleng tanong lang niya ay hindi ko masagot dahil ako mismo ay hindi rin alam ang isasagot.

“W-Wala naman,” bulalas ko na hindi ko alam kung saan nagmula.

She pursed her lips then smiled at me teasingly afterward.

“Alam mo ba, I caught him staring at you kanina.” She muttered.

I felt my face paled and numb like all my blood in my face is gone.

“S-Sino?” I stutteringly asked.

Maica smirked at me. “The one they called ’Ace. The most handsome one.”

And there where I almost lost my consciousness. He noticed me?! But…why am I feeling like I just wanna be eaten on my seat right now.

Kabanata 4

Kabanata 4

Senior

Hinintay ko pang matapos sa pagkain si Maica bago kami tuluyang makaalis ng cafeteria.

“Let’s go. Baka malate na tayo sa next class natin.” Nakangiting baling ko sa kaniya nang makitang tapos na siyang kumain.

Tumayo na kami at nag lakad na palabas ng cafeteria nang biglang magkaroon ng problema. Agad akong napabaling sa aking likuran nang may narinig na nahulog.

Halos lahat ng tao sa cafeteria ay napasulyap sa banda namin dahil sa malakas na ingay na iyon.

“Oh my God! Look what you did! You ruined my clothes!” Nanggagalaiting sigaw ni Elena sa babaeng nakaluhod sa harapan niya sa sahig habang pinupulot ang mangkok at tray na nahulog nito mula sa pagkakabunggo.

“Bakit hindi ka kasi tumitingin sa dinadaanan mo? Bulag ka ba?” Sulsol ng kaibigan ni Elena na si Catherine.

Nanginginig na sa takot ang babaeng nananatiling nakaluhod sa sahig at saka nagmamadaling tumayo at may kinuhang panyo mula sa bulsa ng palda nito. Nanginginig pa ang dalawang kamay nito habang sinusubukang punasan niya ang natapong soup sa palda ni Elena habang paulit ulit na humihingi ng paumanhin dahil sa nangyari.

“S-Sorry, h-hindi ko talaga sinasadya. P-Pasensya na talaga.” She said, stutteringly.

Nakatingin na halos lahat ng narito sa loob ng cafeteria sa kanila. Nakikiusyoso sa nangyayari.

“Don’t touch me! You dirty poor girl! Go away! I don’t wanna see your face here anymore!” Nandidiring tinulak ni Elena ang babae dahil sa ginawang paglapit nito sa kaniya.

Dahilan upang tuluyang matumba sa sahig ang babae nang biglang may umalalay sa kaniya at tinulungan itong tumayo.

Namilog ang mga mata kong inangat ang tingin sa lalaking sumagip sa babae mula sa pagkakatumba sa sahig.

I gulped.

Ace…

“OMG! Si Ace ’yan! Siya yung sinasabi ko sa ’yong nasa likuran ko kanina habang hinihintay ko yung order ko.” mahinang sambit ni Maica sa akin habang ang mga mata ko’y nananatiling nakatutop sa kanila.

Hindi ko nalang pinansin ang sinabi niya dahil ang totoo naman ay kilala ko naman talaga si Ace. Tahimik nalang akong nagmamasid sa nangyayari.

Ace approached the girl as he held her elbow, helping her to stand properly because of Elena’s sudden dragged.

“Are you okay?” Ace asked the girl who’s still holding on his arm as she glances at him in awe.

Nahihihiya man ay marahang tumango ang babae at tinulungan siyang tumayo ni Ace. Bahagya pang namula ang pisngi nito na ikinayuko niya. Iniwas niya ng tingin ang kaniyang mukha upang hindi makita nito.

Napakunot ang noo ko ro’n.

Itinago siya ni Ace sa likuran nito na para bang handa siya nitong protektahan. Habang ang babae sa likod niya ay magkasalikop ang dalawa nitong mga kamay at nagpipisilan ang mga daliri dahil siguro sa kabang nararamdaman niya.

Pinagmamasdan ko ang bawat galaw ni Ace kung paano niya tinulungan ang babae kanina. Halos hindi ko man lang siya napansin na paparating.

He is towering the girl at the back of him as he glares seriously at Elena’s way.

“Seriously, Ace? Tinutulungan mo pa ’yang babae na ’yan? Eh, siya na nga itong tinapunan ako ng soup sa skirt. It’s her fault, Ace.” Hindi makapaniwalang ani ni Elena kay Ace na nakamasid lang sa paghihisterya nito. Peke pa siyang natawa at nilapitan si Ace at ang babaeng nasa likuran niya ngayon.

“You’ll pay for this!” Inis niyang sigaw at akma niyang hahaltakin ang buhok ng babaeng nakatago sa likuran ni Ace.

“Elena!” Ace voice thundered inside the whole cafeteria, bago pa man tuluyang maabot ni Elena ang buhok ng babaeng nakatago sa likuran ni Ace.

Dumagundong ang baritonong boses nito at natahimik ang lahat ng nasa loob ng cafeteria dahil sa malakas at ma-awtoridad niyang tono.

Dinig sa boses nito ang nagsusumigaw na awtoridad. Na walang pwedeng bumangga o sumalungat sa ano mang gusto niyang mangyari. His eyebrows shot up and his lip forming in a thin line. Making him more serious because of his narrowed eyes.

“Stop making a scene Elena, and let this girl away.” Pagtatapos nito sa usapan at saka niya binalingan ng tingin ang babaeng nasa kaniyang likuran, saglit pa silang nagkatitigan bago niya tuluyang hinawakan sa palapulsuhan at tinangay paalis ang babae palabas ng cafeteria.

Napamaang namang tiningnan ng dalawang kaibigan ni Elena si Ace at ang pinagtanggol nitong babae habang paalis ng cafeteria.

They walked past us. Dinaanan lang niya kami habang hawak hawak ang palapulsahan ng kasama niya. I swallowed hard. And letting myself breathe as if I were still holding back the air inside me.

“What is up with Elena? Is she a queen bitch here in school?” You could feel the fear in Maica’s voice when she asked me that.

Nananatili naman ang mga mata kong nakatunghay sa gawi nila Elena, na may nanggagalaiting tingin sa entrance ng cafeteria kung saan lumabas sila Ace.

“She’s a typical spoiled brat with a bitch attitude.” I simply replied to Maica’s question.

Hindi na namin tinignan pa ang grupo nila Elena at lumabas narin kami dahil baka mahuli pa kami sa klase kung magtatagal pa kami rito.

Magkasabay kaming pumasok sa loob ng classroom. Naupo ako sa bandang likuran at bahagyang namilog pa ang aking mga mata nang tinabihan ako ni Maica. I’m a bit surprised by her sudden move. Maybe she thinks that I am her friend now. 

“Tabi tayo ah.” nakangiting paalam nito sa akin at saka inukupa ang upuang nasa kanang bahagi ko dahil wala namang nakaupo.

Tinanguan ko lang siya bilang tugon sa sinabi niya.

Nang may guro na ay tumayo na kami at bumati. At nang uupo na ay napatingin kaming lahat sa may pintuan nang may kumatok do’n. Bumukas iyon at pumasok si Ace kasama ang babaeng tinulungan niya kanina.

Nagulat akong makita siya dito sa loob ng classroom namin. I saw how his eyes roamed the whole room as he entered. At nahanap ng kaniyang mga tingin ang pwesto ko at agad naman akong nanigas sa kinatatayuan ko. Napayuko ako ng bahagya at nag-iwas ng tingin.

“I’m sorry Miss to interrupt your class. Hinatid ko lang po itong bagong magiging student n’yo narin po sa klase na ito.” mababang boses na saad ni Ace.

I noticed that my classmates were attentive to what Ace will going to say. Their eyes were fixated on every moved he was about to do.

“No, it’s okay magsisimula palang rin naman ako.” sabi ni Miss habang sinusuring tingnan ang babaeng kasama ni Ace.

Binalingan ng tingin ni Ace ang babae. “I leave you here now. I need to go.” Ace said to her.

The girl nod at him shyly and when Ace got satisfied with it, ay diretso na rin siyang naglakad palabas ng pinto.

I gasped at that. I even thought of him looking at my place again. But he didn’t.

“So you’re miss?” Tanong ng guro naming medyo naging istrikto naman ang dating ngayon.

“Tuscon, Miss. Angela Tuscon po,” Nahihiyang aniya at saka kalauna’y yumuko.

“Okay, find and take your seat now, Ms. Tuscon.” Mahinahon na niyang sabi ngayon.

Naglakad sa bandang gitna si Angela at dire-diretsong naglakad papalapit sa upuang nasa kaliwang bahagi ko. Magiging katabi ko siya kung dito siya uupo. Pero may isa pa namang vacant seat sa kanang bahagi rin sa harapan ko.

Napapantastikuhan akong napatingin sa kaniya nang pinili niyang upuan ang nasa tabi ko. Agad siyang umupo at inilabas ang mga gamit niya.

“Siya diba ’yung tinulungan ni Ace kanina?” Bulong ni Maica mula sa aking tabi.

“Oo. Siya nga.” Mahinang sagot ko.

Sobrang lapit naming dalawa sa isa’t isa para walang makarinig sa pinag-uusapan namin.

Nag-umpisa na rin ang bulungan ng iba nang makaupo na sa tabi ko si Angela. Makikita sa mata ng mga kaklase kong usisero ang inggit at inis nila para rito. Lalo na sa mga kababaihan. But the boys didn’t mind her but some are mad at her dahil sa nangyari kanina sa cafeteria, they all loved Elena so I wouldn’t ask if why.

“Kala mo kung sinong maganda, natulungan lang ng isang Ace Ventura.” sabi ng isa kong kaklaseng babae at nandidiring tinignan nito si Angela na nakaupo sa aking tabi.

“Kaya nga! May pahawak hawak pang nalalaman. Eww!” The girl agreed to the statement of her friend.

“Paniguradong tinulungan lang ’yan ni kuya Ace dahil naaawa sa kanya.” I heard some in front mumbled.

“Yuh. Correct ka dyan girl!”

“Class stop whimpering! I can even hear your noises here.” istriktang sabad ng Miss sa harapan.

Nagsibalikan naman sa dating postura ang mga kaklase kong babae na parang walang nangyaring bulungan kanina.

Sinulyapan ko si Angela na nakayuko sa kaniyang upuan na parang wala namang narinig na bulungan. Maybe she heard it and she’s acting normally as if nothing happened.

My other classmates also watching and having her as a subject but when our class started they didn’t mind her at all.

Natapos na ang pang umagang klase at nang nag-lunch ay sabay kaming kumain ni Maica sa cafeteria. Hindi rin namin kinakausap si Angela dahil mukhang wala naman itong balak makipag kaibigan sa amin. I’m also amazed that Maica stayed with me until lunch break. It’s once in a blue moon.

I’m actually expecting to see Ace, here in the cafeteria this afternoon but I didn’t saw him. Even when we went out for the recess in the afternoon I am also hoping to at least see him from afar. I don’t get this feeling but one thing I know and it’s that I wanted to see him.

Nanlulumo akong naglalakad palabas ng campus kasama si Maica sa aking tabi.

Nakakapagod na natapos ang unang araw ng klase. Nagpaalam na ako kay Maica nang makita ko na ang sasakyan namin na nakapark sa labas ng school.

I haven’t even seen him at lunchtime nor recess. Pumasok na ako sa backseat ng sasakyan at isinandal ang ulo sa backrest ng upuan dahil sa pagod na nararamdaman.

Grabe. First day of school palang feeling ko sobra na akong napagod. Minasahe ko ang gilid ng aking ulo at iminulat ang aking mga mata nang maramdamang mag-umpisa nang umandar ang aming SUV.

I took a glance at the window to glance outside the street when my eyes caught by him.

Napahinto ako sa ginagawa at napakunot ang noo nang makita ko si Angela na kasama si Ace. Inaalalayan siya nitong makapasok sa sasakyan nito. Siguro ihahatid siya ni Ace sa bahay nila.

I even saw how the people glared and watched them intently like they are was some kind of celebrity.

Pinilit kong hindi nalang pansin dahil umandar narin naman ang aming sasakyan at nalagpasan na ang gawi nila. But my mind was too busy and exhausted thinking about it until I realize that our car was parked in front of our house.

Bumaba na ako ng sasakyan nang makitang nasa tapat na kami ng bahay namin. Sinalubong ako ni mommy nang makababa ako. I kissed her cheek and hugged her for a while.

“You looked exhausted, sweety.” Puna ni mommy nang mapansing matamlay akong nilapitan siya.

I smiled at her tiredly. “Yeah, I guess Mom. First day of school is tiring.” sabi ko at nauna ng pumasok sa loob ng bahay.

Umakyat na ako ng hagdan at pumasok na sa kwarto ko para makapag palit na ng damit.

I lazily put my bag on the table as well as the rest of my belongings. I took off my shoes and put them on my shoe rack near my closet.

I change my uniform to a simple spaghetti strap and pajamas after I cleaned myself. I went to bed when my body couldn’t handle the stress of the day.

Pinikit ko ang aking mga mata. Patagilid akong nahiga at niyakap ang isang malambot kong unan.

Bakit kaya ngayon ko lang nakita si Ace sa campus? Baka dahil hindi siya pumupunta sa grade school before kaya hindi ko siya nakikita noon. Well, baka nga ganoon. Bukod naman kasi ang mga program ng grade school sa High School but it’s still impossible that I haven’t noticed someone liked him back then. And he looks like my senior, now. Maybe he’s in his Senior High School.

Ano kayang strand niya? And where is their building? Malayo kaya samin iyon? Hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili ko sa pag-iisip ng kung ano-ano tungkol kay Ace.

And when I remembered him earlier when I was on our SUV helping Angela to get on his car, makes me feel something aching a bit. Is it possible that I felt envy for Angela because of Ace’s attention to him?

No! I’m not that kind of a person. I never love the attention of anybody else. But if it’s from Ace, I probably trembled even how much I wanted to have it from him.

But then, I’m fine at seeing him every day at school. His attention didn’t matter. Lalo na at ganito pala siya kakilala sa school. I don’t want people to gamble my life, kahit pa ilan na sa mga ito ay naging bullies ko na noon.

I smiled when I realized that I’m only in my first year of High School and I am already thinking about the man who is become my Senior for this year!

Mahigpit kong niyakap at bahagyang pinanggigilan ang una’ng yakap yakap ko.

I can’t believe that I haven’t forgotten him since that night I ignored his hand. But I still can’t get away enough from how my body shivered and frozed every time his glares darted on me.

Kabanata 5

Kabanata 5

Heartbeat

I woke up early the next morning. Good thing dahil nakatulog agad ako kahapon pagkauwi dahil sa pagod ay maaga akong nagising ngayon. I even forgot to eat my dinner. Hindi narin naman ako ginising nila mommy kasi alam niyang pagod ako sa first day of class.

I do the same routine as I did yesterday. At nang tapos na ako sa pag-aayos ‘kuno’. Lumabas na ako ng kwarto ko.

I go to our dining area. Nakita ko si dad na nagbabasa ng tabloid habang nagkakape.

I come to him then hug him tight from the back. Bahagya pa siyang nagulat sa ginawa ko dahil siguro hindi niya ako napansing papalapit sa kaniya.

“Good morning, Blair,” Dad muttered while his eyes are still on the tabloid.

“Good morning din po,” Sabi ko at kumalas na sa pagkakayakap. I sat on the chair near Dad when Mom came.

I took a glance at her way then smile sweetly. “Good morning, Mom!” I greeted her.

Nakangiti itong bumaling at lumapit sa aking gawi para gawaran ng marahang halik sa noo.

“Morning! Seems like you had a very nice sleep, ha?” mommy asked.

“That’s what I think, Mom. I had enough.” I answered then chuckled a bit.

Malawak namang nangiti si Mom sa akin at saka siya naupo sa aking tabing upuan. I started to put some food on my plates when dad spoke.

“So how’s your school yesterday, Blair?” he asked then bite the food on his fork.

I looked at him and stop slicing the bacon on my plate. “It’s good. I mean yeah, it’s fine. Nothing is new.” naguguluhang sagot ko kay Dad, dahil ako man mismo sa aking sarili ay hindi masabi kung kailan ba naging maganda ang mga nangyayari sa akin sa school.

Well, what happened yesterday was a bit unique based on my experience when I was in elementary days. Someone approached me and it’s kinda a big deal for me.

Because I used to be alone the whole time in my grade school. Hindi nila ako kinakausap or nilalapitan kung hindi naman kailangan. They are not even friendly. I always tried to be nice at them but always end up leaving me alone. At kung hindi naman ay sa una lang nila ako nilalapitan at kinakausap tapos kinabukasan ay wala na.

Seems like they are ignoring me. Like I’m such a special thing that you couldn’t get in touch with. But in my case, I’m nothing special. I’m really confused about that time when my friends slowly drifting away from me.

Hindi na nila ako kinakausap at hindi narin nila ako sinasali sa mga group activities nila. Pero dati kami halos lagi ang magkakagrupo.

Noong una ay hindi ako sanay sa gano’ng uri ng trato nila sa akin. But as time pass by, I get used to it.

I wondered what I had done wrong. Until I found out it was because of our family state.

Our family before is not as rich as my other classmate’s elite families. We are contented with what we have. Dad worked so hard to gain more and be successful up to this day. And served the life that he wanted for me and my mom.

He became a popular architect not just in town but in the whole country. And now he is known all over Asia because of his great architectural designs.

He had received numerous awards that proven that he is doing very well in his field. Until the state of our lives changed. From the low state of life to be one of them. We have become one of the elites families here all over our country.

We had a lot of property. Assets. Not just in one place but in different parts of Asia. Our influence also expanded when my Dad entered the business field. He’d been great in everything.

But even so, we never forgot where we came from. Dad is helping charities here in the Philippines. He supports other children’s needs in return for the abundance we enjoy today.

We still keep our feet on the ground. Because we know how hard life is, especially to my Dad who worked harder and harder to elicit everything we have today.

At nang mga panahong umaagat na kami sa buhay ay doon na nag-umpisang mawala isa-isa ang mga kaibigan ko. And then I transferred to a private school because we afford it now.

I thought people will flock to me and I’d made so many friends here in my new school. But then I’m wrong. Mas malala pa ang naranasan ko rito.

They bullied me not physically but verbally. I was in my fifth grade in elementary when that started.

Nalaman nila na mula lang pala kami sa mahirap na buhay na biglang yumaman. They think that my father used Don Denver Ventura to be on the top. But they didn’t even think that my dad worked so hard for it.

They judged me that I’m like my father.  A user. They humiliate me in front of my other schoolmates. In the cafeteria, in our room, even our teacher was in there. They embarrass me in every corner of our school.

Kaya hindi na ako magtataka kung umabot na ’yon sa high school department. The high school campus of our school is just next to our gate connected to them.

Nasanay na rin ako sa gano’ng trato nila sa akin. I used to be eating alone on a bench under the tree. Studying alone at the library and no one dares to approach me.

No one knows about my situation. I never tell that to my dad and mom. I know they would just get worried about me. And I don’t want them to worry about me.

Medyo nawala na rin naman ang ilang pang-aasar nila sa akin nang mag grade six na ako. They are not bullying me anymore. They are just eying me from afar and never come nearer to me.

But of course, except kila Elena. Ang numero unong bully ko. Kaya nasanay nalang din ako sa kanilang ginagano’n ako. I just ignore them para iwas narin sa gulo.

Kaya siguro ganito na lang din ako ngayon, nahihirapang magsabi ng araw ko kahapon sa school kila Mom and Dad. Naging mahiyain at ilag narin ako sa ibang mga tao. But then I think if you are eager to be my friend, I will never hesitate to be your friend.

I go to my chair and sit there silently. Maaga akong pumasok ngayon unlike yesterday na halos ma-late na ako.

Nakita kong dumating na si Maica nang bumaling ako sa pintuan. Nagtama ang mga tingin naming dalawa. Akala ko ay iiwasan niya narin ako dahil paniguradong alam niya na ngayon kung bakit walang nakikipag kaibigan sa akin.

But in my surprise ay umupo siya sa upuang katabi ng sa akin kagaya ng kahapon. Napangiti ako ng bahagya dahil hindi naman siguro siya uupo dito sa tabi ko kung hindi niya ako papansinin.

“Ang aga mo today, ah,” Maica uttered which makes my head turned to her.

“A-Ah, hindi naman. Kadarating ko lang din.” I said then looked at the doorway when I saw Angela. Pumasok siya at dire-diretsong naglakad sa upuang inukupa niya kahapon sa tabi ko.

I remember her yesterday when I saw her with Ace guiding her toward his car. Ano kayang nangyari pagkatapos non?

“You know what Blair. Usap-usapan ngayon ’yang si Angela sa buong campus dahil nakita raw nilang hinatid daw siya ni Ace kahapon.” Mahinang bulong ni Maica sa tabi ko habang pareha naming pinagmamasdan si Angela.

I don’t know what is up to her but she’s just like me. But at the same time, I find us both differently. She doesn’t have friends because she’s new in our school, but she also seems not fond of having those. Sanay siyang mag-isa at mukhang wala ring interest makipag-kaibigan kahit sa amin.

Binawi ko ang tingin ko kay Angela nang mapansing nakikiramdam ito sa amin. I shifted my eyes in Maica’s way and curiously glared at her because of what she just said.

“Oo. Actually, I even saw them near our house. Nagulat nga ako kasi nakita kong doon pumasok si Angela. We’re neighbors pala.” Namamangha ring ani Maica sa akin.

Nagparte ang aking bibig at handa na sana sa sasabihin nang pumasok na ang iba pa naming kamag-aral. Tumayo kami agad nang makitang  pumasok na ang aming guro.

The two subjects passed by until break time came.

Nakaupo kaming dalawa ni Maica ngayon sa loob ng cafeteria. Napansin kong matigilan ang lahat ng nasa loob nang makitang papasok ngayon si Ace with his two friends sa loob ng cafeteria.

The students were grumbling about him and some of the girl students grinned when he entered the door.

My eyes caught him at hindi ko na nagawang mag-iwas pa.

His intimidating presence comes again. Kaya ganito nalang ang epekto nito sa iba. I froze in my seat when our eyes met.

Binaba ko ang tingin ko sa kinakain at saka uminom ng juice nang maramdamang nanunuyo ang aking lalamunan.

I gulped, then took a glance at him again when he’s near the counter. I saw him turned his gaze at me. Namilog ang mga mata ko at nag-iwas agad ng tingin dahil hindi ko kinakayang tagalan iyon.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit may pakiramdam akong hindi mapakali sa tuwing nakikita ko siya. I feel uncomfortable when he’s around but the people around him seem adored and intimidated at the same time but the astonished never left their sights.

“Uy…si Ace nandiyan.” mahinang imporma ni Maica sa akin na para bang hindi ko pa alam na nandyan nga ito. She said it normally but she’s in awe as she glances at him.

I just cleared my throat at nagpanggap nalang akong walang narinig at nagpatuloy muli sa pagkain. Hanggang sa natapos na ang recess at bumalik na kami ulit sa klase.

Nagpatuloy ang klase hanggang sa mag-lunch break. Like what happen yesterday ay sabay ulit kaming kumain ni Maica sa cafeteria at hindi ko narin napansin si Ace doon hanggang sa matapos kaming kumain.

Hindi naman sa inaabangan ko siya tuwing magpupunta kami ng cafeteria pero iba lang talaga ’yung pakiramdam ko kapag nakikita ko siya. Kinakabahan ako at hindi mapakali pero ramdam ko na masaya ang pakiramdam ko tuwing gano’n ang epekto niya sa akin.

Nang maghapon na ay inutusan ako ng aming guro na pumunta nang disciplinary office dahil may ipinaaabot itong mga folders na kailangan daw isumite. Hindi ko rin alam pero sa dami raming estudyante na nasa loob ng silid namin ay ako pang nasa likuran ang naatasang dalhin ito.

“Samahan kita,” Suhestyon ni Maica na akma na sa pagtayo sa kaniyang upuan.

“No need, ako nalang. Makinig ka nalang sa lesson ni Miss so I can ask you regarding our topic kung sakaling mahuli ako.” Ani ko sa kaniya.

She just nodded at me so I proceed to go outside of our room.

May kalayuan din ang disciplinary office mula sa grade seven building. Lagpas pa ito ng cafeteria at marami pang pasikot sikot.

Bitbit ko ang mga papel na nasa folders na ipinaaabot sa akin habang naglalakad ako sa initan. Alasdos na ata ng hapon kaya tirik na tirik pa ang araw.

I didn’t mind the heat of the sun that’s lacing on my skin. But I run a bit so I don’t penetrate my skin from the exposure to the sun.

Nang makitang malapit na ako ay binagalan ko na ang lakad ko at sumilong sa lilim ng mga puno na malapit sa building. Katabi ng library ang senior department at ang disciplinary office ng makita ko ito.

Kaya pala ang layo nang narating ko dahil malapit na pala ito sa Senior High building. Tumingin muna ako tinted sliding window nito para tingnan ang nasa loob ng office at nang hindi maaninag ang nasa loob ay bahagya ko munang inayos ang sarili.

I get my handkerchief and wiped my bolter sweat on my forehead. I tucked some strands of my hair at the back of my ear when it stranded on my cheeks.

Pumasok ako ng disciplinary office nang makumportable na sa ayos ng sarili. Bahagya pa akong nakaramdam ng hilo dahil sa sobrang init sa labas habang dito naman ay malamig dahil naka air-conditioned ang buong silid.

Nang makapasok ako ay binati ko ang ilang tao na nasa loob at saka tinungo ang isang glass sliding door kung saan naroon ang pinaka counselor. I knocked first before I slide to open the door.

Napatingin ako kay Mrs. Ramirez na siyang guidance counselor namin. Napayuko ako nang mapansin niyang pumasok na ako sa loob. She looked at me strictly like some real counselor that has this surly appearance.

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Ramirez.” Bati ko rito nang tuluyan na akong humakbang papasok sa loob.

Ngunit natutop ang bibig ko at napako ang aking paningin sa lalaking naka upo sa visitors chair nito sa harap ng table.

He’s facing Mrs. Ramirez’s way and his back was my view. I gulped hard when I noticed he looks familiar. Hindi nga ako nagkamali nang humarap ito para siguro tingnan kung sino ang pumasok.

“Yes Ms. Cortez, what can I help you with?” Istriktang sabi ni Mrs. Ramirez sa akin habang ramdam ko ang seryosong mga mata nitong nakatitig sa akin.

Nananatiling napako ang aking dalawang mata kay Ace na seryosong nakatitig lang din sa akin ngayon. Tumikhim naman si Ace nang mapansing nakatitig pa rin ako sa kaniya at hindi pa sinasagot ang tanong ni Mrs. Ramirez.

Natataranta akong tiningnan si Mrs. Ramirez at sinabing…

“Uhm, p-pinapabigay po ni Miss Shiena itong mga folders sa inyo.” Natataranta kong inilahad ang mga folders na hawak ko.

My shaking hands were noticeable as I held the folders.

Palapit na ako sa table ni Mrs. Ramirez para ilagay iyon don nang muntikan ko nang mabitiwan ang mga ito nang kuhanin ni Ace ang mga papeles mula sa aking pagkakahawak.

“Let me help you bring this,” he said in a very deep voice that immediately made my throat run dry. I swallowed hard.

Kinakabahan man ay agad ko ring binitiwan ang pagkakahawak ko sa mga folders nang maramdaman ko ang kamay niyang nakahawak sa ibabaw ng aking kamay.

“Ah, s-sige. Thank you.” I stutteringly said then bit my lower lips afterward. Binasa ko pa ang pang-ibabang labi ko nang maramdaman ang panunuyo nito.

“Naku! Ito talagang si Shiena sa’yo pa talaga inutos ito, e’ may kabigatan pa naman ito at tirik pa ang araw sa labas.” Bahagya pa akong nagulat nang mag-iba ang tono ng pananalita ni Mrs. Ramirez.

“A-Ayos lang naman po. Urgent daw po kasi.” I shyly replied to her.

“Yes, pero sana kahit sa iba nalang sana niya inutos. But thank you for giving me this early.” pagpapasalamat nito sa akin na nasa aking mga braso ang tingin.

Nang bumaling ako sa gawi ni Ace na halos katabi ko na dahil nasa harap na rin ako ng lamesa ay nakita kong nasa braso ko rin ang kaniyang mga mata.

I looked at my arms and my eyes widened a bit when I notice my pale skin was now reddened. Dahil siguro sa init kanina sa labas.

“Sigi po. Aalis na po ako.” Nahihiyang sabi ko kay Mrs. Ramirez at hindi nalang din pinansin ang aking namumulang balat. I feel like my face was also flushing at the moment. Nakakahiya at nakatingin pa naman sa akin si Ace.

Hindi ko na hinintay pang magsalita si Mrs. Ramirez at walang lingon-lingon akong umalis ng silid na iyon. But when I heard Ace speak, I stopped.

“Sandali,” Narinig kong anito. Huminto ako at marahang pinihit ang nakatalikod kong katawan paharap sa kaniya.

His serious glares were on me as he offers me his hand.

“Take this, masyadong mainit sa labas.” Anito at ang mga mata ko naman ay nagbaba ng tingin sa dark blue umbrella na hawak niya.

“H-Hindi na, baka wala kang magamit,” I said.

Bahagyang nagtaas ang isang kilay nito sa akin na animong nagtataka.

“My room is just outside. Malayo pa ang building mo, take this.” He said then held my hand as he gave it to me when he noticed that I was hesitant.

Napalunok ako nang hawakan niya ang aking kamay. “S-Salamat, isasauli ko nalang sa’yo bukas.”

“Mm,” then he nods his head.

Mabilis akong naglakad at isinarado ang pintuan at lumabas na ng office. Napahawak ako sa ang aking dibdib habang mahigpit ang kapit ng isa kong kamay sa hawakan ng payong na ipinahiram ni Ace sa akin.

He held my hand. That moment I remember how my heart skipped a beat. I have felt the speed of my heartbeat for some unknown reason. I don’t know why I feel like I can’t breathe every time I’m in front of him. I feel like I’m suffocated every time I know he’s around.

But when his hand held me, I feel like I stop from breathing and my heartbeats beaten up my chest…and it makes me lost my hearing. Because of the loud throbs of my heart.

Kabanata 6

Kabanata 6

Blushed

Excited at hindi ako mapakali nang matapos ang klase namin sa pang-umaga. It was now break time and we’re heading to the cafeteria. I was smiling the whole time simula nang pumasok ako kaninang umaga because I’m hoping to see Ace dahil isasauli ko na sa kaniya ang payong na ipinahiram niya sa akin kahapon.

“Bagong bili ba ’yang payong mo, Blair? Kanina mo pa kasi hawak sa room ’yan.” Maica said nang makaupo na kami sa loob ng cafeteria.

“Ah, hindi may nagpahiram lang sa akin kahapon.”

“Oh? Sino? Isasauli mo na ba ngayon?”

Napakagat labi ako at inilibot ang aking mata sa loob ng cafeteria para hanapin si Ace, but he wasn’t here yet pa.

“Uhm, yes maybe later.” I simply replied to her.

Napalibot din ng tingin si Maica sa buong paligid, animong hinahanap kung saan ako nakatingin. Pumirmi naman ako ng upo at tingin dahil baka magtaka siya sa inaasal ko.

“Bakit mamaya pa? You can give it back now so we can eat our foods.” She probed.

“Mamaya ko nalang isasauli,” ani ko at binaba na ang hawak kong payong sa tapat kong lamesa.

I pursed my lips when we finished our snacks at napansin kong hindi pa rin dumadating si, Ace.

Bakit kaya wala siya ngayon? Baka late ang recess nila sa amin.

I sighed then stood up together with Maica nang wala na kaming gagawin pa rito. Maybe this afternoon ay pumunta siyang cafeteria, do’n ko nalang isasauli ang payong na pinahiram niya sa akin. I hopefully said to myself.

But when afternoon came ay hindi ko ulit siya nakita. Maybe he’s busy. Pangatwiran ko sa aking sarili nang matantong hindi na siya nakapuntang cafeteria.

His friends weren’t here also kaya baka abala nga talaga sila sa klase nila. Pero malabo iyon dahil mahapon lang ay nandito sila.

But then again, I hoped for the noon break time but I also failed again.

Nakanguso akong kumakain ng turon na binili ko kanina habang nakapwesto sa isang lamesa sa loob ng cafeteria katabi si Maica. Where is him? Hindi ba siya ginugutom at hindi siya lumalabas ng kaniyang classroom?

“What’s with your borrowed umbrella? Kanina mo pang umaga dala ’yan. Hindi mo pa rin ba nakikita ’yong may-ari?” Maica curiously asked beside me. Mukhang hindi na rin siya mapakali at maya’t maya ang naging tanong nito sa akin marahil napapansin niya na kanina ko pangang umaga hawak iyon.

“Hindi pa eh,” tipid kong isinagot sa kaniya dahil hindi ko pa rin nakikita si Ace hanggang ngayon.

“Who’s the owner ba kasi?” Kuryosong tanong niya sa akin.

Napakurap ako sa tanong niya at napaiwas ng tingin. Nahihiya akong sabihin sa kaniya that it was Ace umbrella dahil baka kung ano ang isipin niya. But if I said to her, maybe she can help me return this to him.

At isa pa, wala namang malisya itong tungkol sa payong na ito.

“Ah, ano kasi, ’di ba nung pumunta ako ng disciplinary office kahapon masyadong mainit sa labas. I saw Ace there with Mrs. Ramirez inside her office,” I explained to her.

Nakita ko pa kung paanong mamilog ang mga mata niya. She’s not going to react maliciously, alright.

“Kiya Ace? Oh my…so what happened next? Tell me what happened!” She grinned at me excitedly.

Napangiwi naman ako ng bahagya dahil nahihiya akong ikuwento sa kaniya. Even there is no embarrassment that happened yesterday, I feel like I was embarrassed because he was there.

I gulped before I continued what I’m telling her.

“Uhm, I was about to go when he gave me his umbrella. I refused him at first but he insists dahil mainit daw sa labas.”

“Oh my god! So meaning, it’s kuya Ace umbrella? Hope all!” She giggled and smiled at me like she was kilig.

“Ah, oo sa kaniya ’tong payong.”  I simply said at tipid siyang nginitian.

“Teka nga muna, why didn’t you tell me this earlier?”

“Because there’s no use, I guess?” I hesitantly answered her.

Her lips protruded then his eyes chinks as she glared at me.

“Fine. But please next time tell me when you see him again. Gosh, he’s a living greek god.” She exaggeratedly narrates.

“Kaso mukhang wala siya ngayong araw. Hindi ko siya nakita simula kaninang umaga.” I weakly muttered to her.

She grabbed her bottle of juice from our table and sipped on that before she gazes at me again.

“You’re right, wala nga siya ngayong maghapon. Baka busy ang mga seniors natin ngayon?” She said, concluding.

“But it’s only our second day, of school,” I muttered

She shrugged her shoulders and twisted her lips. “I don’t know. Pero kapag hindi natin siya nakita ngayong araw pwede mo pa namang isauli ’yan bukas.” Then she raised her brow and moved it like she has something up to.

I let a sigh and nod at her. Gano’n nga ang nangyari at hindi ko na siya nakita hanggang sa mag-uwian kami.

When the next morning came ay kasama ko na si Maica na inabangan siya sa loob ng cafeteria. Nakapwesto na kami sa table namin at kumakain ng meryenda at inaabangan ang kaniyang pagdating.

“Sa tingin mo darating siya ngayon?” She asked me.

Nagkibit balikat lang ako sa kaniya dahil hindi ko rin naman talaga alam kung pupunta siya ngayon.

“Baka mamayang lunch, malay mo pumunta na siya.” Ani Maica sa’kin nang hindi pa rin namin nakita si Ace nang umaga na iyon.

We’re almost late nang pumasok kami ng classroom kakahintay sa kaniya kaso ay hindi ulit siya dumating. Napapaisip ako kung bakit hindi na siya pumupunta pa ng cafeteria. Even the other seniors ay hindi ko na rin masyadong nakikita, may iilan but his batch weren’t there.

We wait until lunch but it’s the same as the morning. Wala pa rin ni anino niya sa loob at labas ng cafeteria. At nang maghapon ay gano’n din.

Pagod at bagsak ang balikat kong pumasok ng kwarto ko pagmauwi ko nang hapon nang araw na iyon. Kailan ko kaya siya ulit makikita? Hindi na ba niya kailangan ’tong payong niya kaya hindi na niya kinuha sa akin?

Sana naman bukas makita ko na siya. Ani ko sa aking isipan habang hawak ang maliit na payong na natupi ko na na nakapatong sa aking higaan. At nang gabi ring ’yon ay nilunod ako ng aking isipan kung paano ko kaya siyang muli makikita para maisauli ko na sa kaniya ang payong niya.

Nang sumunod na araw ay mahigpit ang hawak ko sa payong na naglalakad patungong table namin ni Maica sa loob ng cafeteria at nagbabakasakaling masumpungan ko na siya ngayon.

We’re in the cafeteria now waiting for him again. Maica was sitting beside me at mukhang may malalim na iniisip. Habang ako naman ay nakatingin sa payong na ipinatong ko muna sa ibabaw ng lamesa.

“I heard from my cousin busy na daw talaga ang mga seniors. Naiba ata ang schedule nila sa’ting mga junior high kaya hindi natin siya naaabutan.” Maica said.

Napabaling naman ako sa kaniya ng tingin.

“Gano’n ba?” Matamlay kong ani, bahagyang nasurpresa dahil alam ko na ngayon ang posibleng dahilan kung bakit hindi na namin siya nakikita ngayon.

She nodded her head slowly but then she smiled at me afterward.

“Bakit ngayon ko lang naisip ’to. If we can’t catch him here at the cafeteria why won’t we go to their department instead of waiting for him here?” Nakangising ani sa akin ni Maica.

Napakunot naman ang noo ko sa sinabi niya at nabuhayan ng loob. But…

“Isn’t it a bad idea if we go to Senior High School?” Nangangamba kong tanong sa kaniya.

“Hindi ’yan! Akong bahala, sasamahan kita.” She said with giggles on her lips.

Nag-aalinlangan man ay pumayag na rin ako. I need to return his umbrella dahil baka kailanganin niya rin ito. Kaya nang mag-break kami nang hapon na iyon ay dumiretso agad kami ng Senior High para maisauli na ang payong na ito.

“Hindi ba nakakahiya, Maica?”

Kinakabahan kong tanong sa kaniya nang naglalakad na kami sa hallway ng Senior High. May ilang nakatingin sa amin at nginingitian kami pero hindi ko alam kung paano ko iyon susuklian.

I feel shy to face the people here lalo na at hindi ako sanay sa mga mata nilang nakatitig sa akin.

“Ayos lang ’yan. At isa pa, we’re here to return his umbrella, so there’s nothing to be shy of.”

Marahan nalang akong tumango sa kaniya at mas hinigpitan ang kapit sa payong na hawak ko habang naglalakad kami.

“Excuse me kuya, pwede po bang magtanong?” Maica asked the guy who was about to pass on our way.

Huminto ang lalaki na animong napadaan lang talaga at may importanteng dapat na gawin. Nang tumigil ito sa paglalakad at balingan kami ng tingin ay nakita ko pang matigilan si Maica. At kahit ako man ay napalunok nang mamukhaan ang lalaki.

“Yes, what is it about?” It’s one of Ace’s friends who stopped in front of us.

“A-Ah, ’yung r-room po ni kuya Ace.” Maica stuttered at kita ko kung paano niya pilit na tagalan ang titig sa lalaki.

The guy seems very serious and annoyed at the same time when Maica spoke up.

Mabilis akong hinawakan ni Maica at bahagyang hinila para ipakita sa harapan niya.

“My friend is here, may isasauli siya kay kuya Ace.” Ngayon naman ay mukhang naka-recover na siya mula nararamdaman niya kanina. She looks confident when she places me in front of him.

Naglikot ang aking mga mata nang maramdaman kong tingnan ako nito. I didn’t glance at the guy in front of me.

“Wala ba kayong klase ngayon? Hindi ba’t juniors kayo?” He asked me.

Nag-angat ako sa kaniya ng tingin nang tanungin niya ako.

“May isasauli nga lang kami. So tell us the room of kuya Ace para hindi kami mahuli sa klase.” Si Maica na mukhang nagtataray naman ngayon.

Napangunot ang seryosong mukha ng kaibigan ni Ace na bumaling sa kaniya sa aking likuran.

“So where is his room, kuya?” Maica snorted.

The guy in front of me sighed before he uttered words. “Fine. He’s a STEM student, sa third floor, second room.” The man growled lazily.

“Sigi, salamat.” Sabi ko sa kaniya at mukhang may gagawin rin siya at naabala lang namin. Nang humarap na ako kay Maica para makaalis na agad kami ay may bigla pa siyang tinanong rito.

“Eh ikaw? What’s your strand? Anong room mo kuya?” Maica shamelessly asked the guy who seems annoyed to her.

Nahihiya kong hinila ang kaniyang braso paalis ron kaso ay mukhang ayaw niyang paawat.

The guy snobishly glared at her. “It’s none of your business, little girl.” Anito at saka kami tinalikuran ng muli at naglakad paalis.

Naiwang nakanganga si Maica at nakabusangot ang mukhang umakyat kami ng third floor.

“Akala mo kung sinong gwapo, napaka snob naman,” Maica grumbled in so much annoyed.

“Buti si kuya Ace hindi niya katulad. Nakakainis siya. I hate that guy!” Then she exclaimed when we almost reached the third floor.

“Baka may gagawin lang siya, Maica. Huwag ka ng magalit don.” I calmed to her dahil ramdam kong napikon lang siya dahil hindi siya nito sinagot ng matino.

She pursed her lips as we stop from walking. Huminto kami sa barandilya saglit bago muling magpatuloy patungong classroom ni Ace.

“Hmp! I would never dare to asked him again. He’s so suplado. Tayo na nga lang kay kuya Ace, buti pa ang isang ’yon mas matino pa sa kaniya.” She grunted then pulled my hand as she slipshod me towards Ace’s room.

Wala naman akong nagawa dahil mabilis niya akong natangay. Namilog naman ang mga mata ko at naramdaman kong manuyo ang aking lalamunan nang huminto kami sa paglalakad sa tapat ng pintuan ng pangalawang room dito sa third floor. It’s Ace’s room.

“M-Maica, sandali lang naman.” I strumbled and almost back out.

“Huh? Nandito na tayo, anong sandali?”

Binasa ko ang labi kong pinanuyuan na dahil sa kabang nararamdaman ko. Sumilip ako sa bintanang medyo tanaw ko ang mga estudyanteng nasa loob.

“M-May lecturer ata sila. Bukas nalang kaya natin isauli?” Kinakabahan kong sinabi.

Her both eyebrows raised in surprise.

“What? No way, Blair nandito na tayo. Stop kidding me alright. Isasauli lang naman natin yung payong na pinahiram niya sa’yo. At saka ayaw ko ng bumalik dito bukas, baka makita ko pa yung masungit na lalaking ’yon, kaya wala ng ipagpapabukas pa, ngayon na Blair.” She declared.

Napaawang ang aking mga labi nang walang ano-ano ay kumatok na si Maica sa pintuan. Halos mapatakip ako sa aking mukha at gusto ko nalang na umalis na at tumakbo palayo dito.

But when the door open my heart began to beat rapidly.

“Yes? Ano ’yon?” The Miss asked Maica.

Napalunok ako nang bumukas ang pintuan ng pagkalaki laki at kitang kita namin ang mga estudyanteng nakatingin sa gawi namin ngayon. Nakakahiya! Mukhang naistorbo namin ang klase nila!

“Uhm, Miss can we excuse for kuya Ace?” Maica pronounced.

Pinagtaasan naman ng kilay ni Miss si Maica at saka naglipat sa akin ang tingin nito. Napayuko ako at hindi nagawang tingnan ang ginang pabalik dahil sa matalim nitong pagtingin sa amin.

“You’re both from junior high, what are these two little girls doing in here? You have your classes at this hour at nagagawa ninyong magpunta sa department ng seniors?” Nakataas ang kilay na sinabi ng Miss sa amin.

“Where here for kuya Ace po, Miss.” Maica inserted.

“I heard you, little girl–”

“But you asked us if what are we doing in here.” Pagsagot pa ni Maica.

Halos mapasapo ako sa aking mukha nang magsalita pang muli si Maica. Baka hindi na kami makabalik pang muli dito at ma-banned na kami sa gingawa niya.

“You’re being disrespectful, little girl–”

“Excuse me, Miss, is there any problem here?” Mabilis na nag-angat ang mga mata ko nang marinig ko ang boses ni Ace.

Nasa likuran na siya ngayon ni Miss at mukhang napansin na ata kami. Dito nga siya naka-room!

“Wala naman, Mr. Ventura–

“Kuya Ace, may isasauli lang sana si Blair sa’yo.” Putol ni Maica kay Miss na mukhang may sasabihin pa kaso ay naputol nang umungot ang kaibigan ko.

Nahuli naman ng mga mata ni Ace ang gawi ko. Ilang segundo pa kaming nagkatitigan at ang puso ko naman ay halos kumawala na sa aking dibdib dahil sa malakas na pagkabog nito.

Hanggang sa nagbaba ang mga mata niya sa kamay ko na hawak hawak ang payong na isasauli ko sa kaniya.

“Excuse me Miss, may importante lang po kaming pag-uusapan ng mga juniors.” Bigla ay seryosong ani Ace na nagpabigla sa akin.

Tumingin pa munang muli sa aming dalawa ni Maica ang ginang bago kami tuluyang iniwan. Lumabas naman si Ace ng pintuan at saka isinara iyon.

Nang mamataan ko naman si Maica ay nakita kong tumalikod ito sa amin at naglakad palayo sa amin patungong hagdan. Teka, bakit ako nito iniwanan?

“You’re returning it now,”

Napabaling ako kay Ace nang marinig ko siyang magsalita.

“A-Ah, oo s-salamat.” Ani ko at iniabot sa kaniya ang payong na mahigpit kong hinahawakan.

Pinagmasdan niya pa muna ako ng matagal bago naglipat ang mga mata niya sa payong na hawak ko.

“Sa’yo na ’yan.” He said in a large deep voice.

“H-Huh? N-Nako, hindi na may payong na rin akong dala ngayon. Isasauli ko na ito sa’yo, ilang araw na ring nasa akin.” I bit my lower lip after I said that.

Pakiramdam ko ay ang dami ko nang sinabi.

Saglit pang nagsalubong ang kaniyang mga kilay at tinitigan ako ng ilang segundo bago tuluyang kinuha sa aking kamay ang payong niya. I slowly let a soft sigh in relief when he finally have his umbrella.

“Okay,” he growled habang ang mga mata niya ay panandaliang napako sa payong na kaniyang hawak.

“H-Hindi ko agad nasauli ’yong payong mo k-kasi hindi kita laging naaabutan sa cafeteria.” Bigla kong ani.

What am I explaning this though? Oh gosh, I’m doomed.

“My schedule had small changes, naiba na at hindi kasabay ninyong mga juniors katulad nung first-day kaya hindi mo talaga ako maaabutan.”

His voice was large and deep. Hindi ko tuloy maiwasang mailang at kabahan lalo na sa tuwing mag-aangat ako ng tingin sa kaniya ay naiilang ako sa kaniyang mga titig.

“K-Kaya pala,” I mumbled.

“Yeah, may klase kayo ngayong oras hindi ba? Baka mahuli na kayo.” He then said to me.

“Oo, dumaan lang talaga kami para isauli ’yung payong mo,” I muttered hesitantly.

“You should go, I also have classes.” Bigla ay seryoso nitong sinabi sa akin.

Nagulat naman ako sa sinabi niya. “A-Ah s-sigi, aalis na rin kami. Sorry if we disturb you in your classes.” I apologize then give her a small awkward smile.

“No, it doesn’t matter.” Tipid niyang sinabi.

Naiilang man ako ay tinignan ko siya sa kaniyang mga mata. “S-Sigi mauna na ako,” paalam ko sa kaniya at mabilis akong tumalikod at naglakad patungo kung nasaan si Maica.

Hindi na ako lumingon para tingnan siya kung nakapasok na ba siya ng room niya o nananatiling nakatayo sa labas ng kaniyang classroom. Kagat labi akong naglakad patungong hagdan at pigil ang ngiti kong kumakawala sa aking mga labi.

My heart skipped and almost burst out every time my eyes caught him. He really hit on me differently.

“What are you smiling at, Blair? Nasauli mo na ’yong payong?”

Mabilis na nagseryoso ang aking ekspresyon at nawala ang ngiti kong pigil na pinapakawalan ko kanina nang makita ko si Maica na nakatayo na pala sa aking harapan ngayon.

“O-Oo,”

Nanliit ang mga mata nitong tiningnan ako at animong sinusuri ako.

“You’re cheeks were flushing, naiinitan ka ba?” Tanong niya sa akin.

Agad ko namang sinaklolohan ang magkabila kong pisngi na ngayon ko lang naramdamang nag-iinit na pala.

“N-Namumula ba?” Tanong ko pa sa kaniya na animong kuryoso rin sa akin.

“Yes,” she said while she nods her head.

“Baka nga sa init lang, tara na.” Ani ko sa kaniya at iniwasan na ang mga mata niyang nanunuring nakamasid sa akin.

“You’re blushing, Blair. It’s obvious.”

Napahinto ako saglit at nagtuloy din sa paglalakad nang sumunod na sa akin si Maica pababa ng hagdan.

I’m blushing? W-Why? At nang biglang sumagi sa isip ko si Ace ay pakiramdam ko’y mas lalong nag-init ang aking mga pisngi.

I guess it’s because of the umbrella after all. Then I let my smile be plastered on my lips.

Kabanata 7

Kabanata 7

Save

Monday morning and I woke up early. I look at the ceiling for a while.

It’s Monday again. Naaalala ko dati kung gaano ako katamad bumangon tuwing monday. I always want to stay in my bed and sleep. But now I need to go to my bathroom and take a bath.

Hindi ko pa rin makalimutan ang nangyari nung nakaraang linggo. I won’t forget that we go to Aces’ room just to return the umbrella. Hindi ko maiwasang makaramdam ng kakaiba sa tuwing sasagi sa aking isipan ang mga mata niyang nakatitig sa akin na hindi ko man lang magawang tingnan.

After kong mag shower ay nagbihis na ako. Naupo ako sa tapat ng vanity at doon nag suklay ng buhok.

I’m done blow-dried my hair. So I’m gonna comb my hair nalang for a minute.

I go out of my room and went downstairs after all of it. When I’m down there, I choose the path leading to our dining room.

I saw mom preparing my snacks for this day. As usual. As my daily habit, I go to them and kiss them on their cheeks and greeted them with my good mornings.

I sat on my chair and start eating my food. I look up to dad when he stood up and hastily saying his goodbye to us.

“I need to go early to the office today. Something important. I’m gonna go now.” Dad said. Then he approached mom to kiss her and to me also.

Mom just nodded her head as her response.

“Take care, Dad,” I said to him.

“Drive safely!” Mayamaya ay pahabol pang sinabi ni mom kay dad na malapit ng makalabas ng dining room.

“I will wifey!” dad shouted.

Napangiti ako ron. Dad and mom were always good together. I never saw them fight nor having an argument. They always have this care and softness towards each other.

Nang matapos ko na ang aking agahan ay nagpaalam narin ako kay mom.

Nasa kotse ako ngayon habang hinihintay na makapasok si manong para makaalis na kami.

And when the car stop in our school. I immediately open the door and went out.

Naglalakad ako ngayon sa isang path na wala pang masiyadong dumadaan. Maganda kasi ang daan na ito. Even na malayo ito sa building namin ay pinili ko paring dito maglakad. Maaga pa naman kaya may oras pa ako.

Pinagmasdan ko ang iilang matatayog na puno dito sa campus namin. At ang fountain na nasa middle part ng ground field.

Pinagpatuloy ko ang paglalakad ng bigla akong mapaatras dahil sa nakabungguan ko. Medyo mabilis ang paglalakad niya kaya hindi ko agad napansin na magkakasalubong kami.

Nakatingin lang ako sa ibaba at hindi ko man lang nagawang pagmasdan ang taong nakabungguan ko.

I saw his shoes. He’s a male. Dahan dahan kong tiningala ang ulo ko para humingi ng pasensya.

“Uhm, I’m sorry, hindi ko sinasadya.” nahihiyang paghingi ko ng tawad sa kaniya dahil mukhang nagmamadali siya base sa bilis ng lakad niya kanina.

I gulped hard as I looked at him when his serious eyes bore on me.

“Ayos lang. Kasalanan ko rin dahil mabilis yung lakad ko kaya siguro hindi mo ako napansin.” aniya sabay kamot sa kanyang batok. Napansin ko pang pinamulahan siya ng pisngi kalaunan.

Nanliit ang mga mata kong tuluyan na siyang pinagmasdan nang maramdamang kumportable ako sa kaniya. Nahihiya ba siya sa akin? Bakit siya namumula? I asked myself when I noticed his sudden flushed.

“Sean! Nandiyan ka lang pala, kanina pa kita hinahanap. Nakalimutan mo ’tong mga libro mo sa kotse.” I heard a familiar voice of a woman at the back of me.

“Kaya nga, pabalik na sana ako ron para kunin ito, kaso nakabungguan ko ’tong si Blair.” mahinang sabi ni Sean.

Saglit naman akong natigilan sa sinabi niya. Pano niya nalaman ang pangalan ko? Ang weird naman. Ngayon ko lang naman siya nakita pero alam niya na agad ang pangalan ko.

“Blair? Oh my gosh! Blair ikaw nga.” malakas ang boses na sabi ni Maica nang maharap niya ang gawi ko.

Nagulat naman ako nang mapansing siya pala ang babaeng nag-abot ng libro dito kay Sean.

“Hi, good morning,” I greeted her, trying to give her a small smile.

Binalingan niya ako ng tingin. Her eyes were glinting in awe and mockery.

“Morning! Si Sean nga pala, he is my cousin.” pakilala niya sa lalaking nakabungguan ko kanina.

I lifted my glance at Seans’ way and I saw him took out his hand. I hesitated at first but when I noticed Maica’s glares on me, I took it and shook our hands.

“I’m Sean. Nice meeting you” nakangiting pagpapakilala nito sa akin.

His handsome. I can say it in one glance. May katangkaran din ito kumpara sa mga kasing edad ko. Maputi ang kutis at bagsak ang buhok. I smiled at him a bit.

“Blair. Nice meeting you too.” nahihiyang sabi ko.

Binawi ko rin agad ang kamay ko sa pagkakahawak niya. Nakita kong umawang ang bibig niya dahil sa biglaang pagbawi ko ng aking kamay.

Lumapit si Maica sa akin saka isinukbit ang kaliwang braso niya sa kanang braso ko. I looked at her.

“Una na kami ni Blair, baka ma-late na kami sa first period.” sabi ni Maica sa pinsan niyang si Sean.

He glances at me for a while then looked at his cousin beside me. “Sigi, I have to go as well.” sabay baling nito sa akin at tipid akong binigyan ng tipid niyang ngiti.

Naweweirdohan man ako sa mga kinikilos niya ay nginitian ko parin siya bilang respeto.

“Bye couz! See yah later!” nakatalikod na kami nag sinabi iyon ni Maica.

“Naaalala mo ba si Sean? Siya yung sinasabi ko sayong pinsan kong may gusto sayo.” Nakangiting aniya.

Napag-usapan namin ni Maica ang tungkol sa pang aasar sa akin nila Elena noon. And to be in fact alam niya na pala iyon. Dahil may pinsan daw siyang dito rin nag aaral at palagi daw itong nagkukwento tungkol sa akin.

Nagulat ako sa nalaman kong iyon. At sinabi pa sa akin ni Maica na may gusto raw iyon sa akin. Nagtaka naman ako kung bakit ako non magugustuhan.

Her cousin is one of the gang who bullied me before. At nagtino lang daw ito ng kausapin siya ng counselor ng school namin, at nangakong hindi na mauulit iyon.

Hindi ko alam na pinagsabihin pala sila sa disciplinary office ang lahat ng mga kaklase kong kumukutya sa akin noon. Lagi lang kasi nito silang sinasaway. Kaya nagulat ako nang maikwento sa akin ito ni Maica.

All this time ang akala ko ay huminto na sila sa pangungutya sa akin when I’m on my last year in primary school. Pero ’Yun pala ay kinausap silang lahat at sinabihang suspended sila ’pag ginawa pa nila iyong muli sa akin.

Maybe dad knows about it before. Kasi hindi naman sila kakausapin ng guro namin kung walang lumapit na magulang. Pero bakit parang wala naman silang alam? And to be fact ni minsan ay hindi rin ako nagsumbong kaya nakakapagtakang may nagtangkang magsumbong sa aming guro kaya napagalitan sila.

Maybe that person who saves me from all the hate I gathered is not one of my haters. Maybe he or she is on my side and he or she just felt pity for me. But then, thanks to him or her.

My forehead creased and shook my head in the meantime. “Hindi eh. Tsaka sabi mo isa siya sa mg bullies ko before pero hindi ko siya matandaan. Sa dami ba naman ng mga kumukutya sakin na manggagamit ako maaalala ko pa siya?” nangingiting sabi ko sa kaniya.

She pursed her lips as glanced at me. “Well, sa bagay. Pero may hitsura naman yung pinsan ko diba? Aminin mo.” pangungulit pa nito sa akin.

“Yeah. He’s good-looking.” I agreed, smiling at her. I give that to her. He really is.

Sabay kaming pumasok sa loob ng classroom at halos magkasunod lang na naupo sa aming magkatabing upuan.

“By the way. Excited na akong mag recess mamaya,” she said with a giggle on her lips.

Nagtataka naman akong bumaling sa kaniya.

“Why? What is up?” I asked her innocently.

She eyed me like I’m some old who forget what is the matter. Her brows moved consecutively like she’s giving me the hint to the idea I already really know.

“Makikita ulit natin sila kuya Ace with his cool friends! Not his other one friend, he’s not cool to me though, sobrang snob at masungit. Anyway, it’s a piece of good news, I heard na bumalik na raw sila sa dati nilang sched. But the bad side of it was magiging hectic na raw yung schedule nila next sem kaya sulitin na natin ’tong first sem nila na nakikita natin sila sa cafeteria.” Aniya nang may nakakalokong ngiti sa mga labi.

So it just means that I’m gonna see him again at the cafeteria? I don’t know but that idea makes me feel heated and bit my lower lips as I started to felt my heart thumped.

“Gano’n ba? Okay.” I simply uttered like it was something that didn’t important nor I really don’t interested at all even I really am caught by excitement.

Nangunot ang noo niya at bahagyang nagsalubong ang dalawang kilay nito. “Ito naman ang aga aga parang walang ka energy energy.” She spatted.

“Hindi naman. Ganito lang talaga ako.” I said to her, biting my lower lips to hide my smile.

Ngumuso siya bago nag-iwas sa akin ng tingin. Napansin ko ngang masyado kang mahiyain. Naku! Hindi magandang attitude yan lalo na at maganda ka pa naman. Ano’t bakit ka nahihiya? You should be confident Blair.“ She said to me convincingly. Then she raised her moving brows like she’s having an idea again.

“Bakit?” kinakabahang tanong ko sa kaniya. The last time she glares at me this way ay nagpunta kami ng senior high to return the umbrella of Ace. And looking at me this time with the same old thoughts is making me feel nervous.

She smirked at kalaunan ay ngumiti siya sa akin. “Ngayon palang tayo magbobotohan para sa class officers including muse and escort ng section natin, samantalang yung iba first day of school palang naka pag botohan na.” Aniya sa nalulungkot na boses. She even pursed her lips before she completely tuned her gaze on me. “I think dapat kang mag muse. You’re even qualified!” She then announced at mapapapalakpak pang aniya.

Napailing iling naman agad ako sa kaniya. “Ano bang sinasabi mo. Nakakahiya. Ayoko.” I refused with a wince plastered on my face.

“Ay hindi, basta I will nominate you. For sure ikaw pa ang mananalo.” taas noong sabi nito na parang siguradong sigurado na mananalo nga ako.

The class started and without any excitement and right projection of Maica, we had nominations for the class officers. Madalas akong masali diyan noon but they just usually nominate me for fun, and not for serious purposes. Kaya kapag may ganito, hinahayaan ko nalang sila.

Break time na ngayon at nandito na kami ngayon sa loob ng cafeteria. Maica was sitting beside me as she glances at me proudly.

“I told you girl, na ikaw ang mananalo and guess what ikaw nga ang nanalo bilang muse ng section natin.” Masayang masaya nitong sabi sa akin.

Nag-iwas ako ng tingin at bumaling sa aking bote ng juice na hawak ko ngayon sa lamesa.

“Kahit na, nakakahiya pa rin. At ano namang gagawin ko dun sa pageant sa darating na intrams? I can’t face the crowd and you know that. “

May parte sa aking masaya dahil nanalo ako sa botohan namin kanina bilang muse. Pero may parte rin sa aking kinakabahan dahil sa may sasalihan daw na pageant ang muse ng bawat section sa darating na intramurals.

Hindi pa rin ako sanay na humarap sa maraming tao kaya nag-aalangan pa ako nung una. Pero dahil sa pamimilit ni Maica at napa oo nalang ako kalaunan sa aming guro. I get pressure, I guess.

“Don’t worry, I will help you deal with it. Tsaka matagal pa naman ’yon. Kaya huwag mo munang isipin.” pagpapakalma nito sa akin dahil hindi na talaga ako mapakali kahit na sabihing sa darating na mga buwan pa iyon gaganapin.

“Okay, basta tulungan mo ako ah,” I said to her, expecting her to really help me with it.

She then gives me a smug smile. “Of course! Basta treat moko ngayon dahil nanalo ka.” nang-uuto pa nitong sabi sa akin.

I just nod my head at her. Naglakad na kami papunta ng counter at saka umorder. I paid for her snacks like what she said at nang makuha na namin ang aming mga pagkain ay naglakad na kami pabalik sa bakanteng table namin kanina.

“Balita ko nanalo ka raw bilang muse sa section niyo? Edi magkakalaban pala tayo niyan sa intramurals.” paasik na sinabi ni Elena kasama ang dalawa niyang kaibigan na nakaaligid sa kaniya.

Hinarangan nila ang dinaraanan namin kaya napahinto kami sa paglalakad. I glanced in Maica’s way and looked down, saying that we just need to go and to just avoid them.

Hindi ko nalang sila pinansin at nagtuloy tuloy lang kami sa paglalakad ni Maica. But then I halted from walking when one of her friends blocked my way.

“At saan ka naman pupunta? Aalis ka na, eh hindi pa tapos magsalita si Elena.” She said like I did the wrong move.

Napayuko at hindi sila nagawang pagmasadan. “A-ano bang kailangan ninyo sakin?” I stutteringly asked when I felt like almost everyone inside the cafeteria was looking at us.

“Wala naman. Gusto ka lang naman naming balaan na hindi ka mananalo dahil ako ang mananalo. Even seniors pa ang makalaban natin hindi ako magpapatalo.” Nang mag-angat ako ng tingin kay Elena ay nakita kong nakataas ang isang kilay nito sa akin.

She took another step, getting more nearer on my way.

“At sino namang nagsabi sa ‘yong ikaw ang mananalo? Huh! Baka nga ni ’ best in’ wala kang makuha!” paghahamon ni Maica kila Elena.

Napaangat ako ng tingin kay Maica at tiningnan siya ng mariin. She shouldn’t talk to her this way dahil mas lalo lang kami nitong pag-iinitan at madadamay pa siya.

Hinawakan ko siya sa braso niya para pigilan siya sa mga sinasabi niya para di na siya masali pa sa gulo ko.

“At sino ka naman para makisawsaw sa usapan namin?” Asked Elena with her raised brow on Maica.

Hinigpitan ko pa ang pagkakahawak ko sa kamay ni Maica para iparating sa kaniya na huwag na lang siyang mag salita.

“Oh, you didn’t know me? Akala ko ba apo ka ng may ari ng paaralang ’to. You should check all my records then if you want to know my name.” Maica hissed at her.

I saw how Elena’s eyes sharpened and her brows arched more. She then took several steps that could go on our way and do something that we couldn’t have to take. I step back, frightened.

Pero bago pa siya tuluyang makalapit sa amin ay napatingin na ako sa lalaking nasa harapan ko na ngayon.

“What is happening here, Elena?” Ace asked her seriously that made her stop from getting to us.

My heart raced with the unknown feeling when his back blocked Elena’s way a bit. Hindi ko makita ang kaniyang mukha dahil nasa likuran niya kami.

“But Ace, siya ang nagsimula ng gulo na ito. Right girls?” pagsisinungaling nito kay Ace.

“Sinungaling ka! Tahimik kaming naglalakad ni Blair dito kuya Ace nang bigla kaming hinarang niyang Elena na yan!” pagsusumbong pa nga ni Maica sa lalaking nasa harap namin ngayon.

Ace slowly turns his gaze on me. Binalingan niya ako ng may seryosong mga tingin. Hindi ko naman nagawang salubungin ang mga mata niya dahil sa kabang nabuhay sa aking loob kaya napayuko nalang ako.

“Maica! Blair! Anong nangyayari dito? May problema ba?” Then suddenly I heard Sean’s voice beside me, asking us in worried.

He roamed his eyes around and looked on Elena’s way together with her friends.

Mukhang napadaan lang ito at napansing may komusyon dito kaya pumunta siya. Halata sa dala nitong mga libro na galing pa atang library.

“W-Wala ito, ayos lang naman kami ni Maica.” mahinang sambi ko sa kaniya.

This wasn’t that big deal but if it’s Elena’s who is making a commotion, everyone always gets updated. Pero kung hindi naman dumating si Ace ay oaniguradong nasaktan na kami ngayon ni Maica. Base on her extremely annoying glares at us, I am so sure that she will attack us.

Naramdaman kong nakatingin lang sa amin si Ace habang kausap ko si Sean. Umalis nalang din bigla ang grupo nila Elena kaya nagsi balikan narin ang lahat sa dati.

“Bro! Come on, nagugutom na ako. Let’s take our order na.” sabi ng kaibigan ni Ace na natanaw kong mukhang naghihintay na rin sa kaniya.

Bumaling ang tingin ko kay Ace at nagulat nang mapansin na sa akin pa rin pala ang kaniyang paningin. Remain in seriousness and nothing to read on it.

“Thanks kuya Ace for saving us. Kung hindi ka lang dumating paniguradong pagtutulungan na kami ng mga ’yon.” pagpapasalamat ni Maica sa kaniya na nasa aking tabi.

Naramdaman ko pang sulyapan ako ni Maica at ani mong hinihintay akong magsalita at may sabihin sa lalaking nasa harapan na namin ngayon.

My mouth parted, searching for the right words to utter. “Uhm. T-thank you,” I simply said to him.

Pingmasdan niya pa ako nang ilang sandali at saka nalang bigla kaming tinalikuran at umalis.

Bakit para siyang galit? Kanina naman kalmado pa siya. Dahil ba kila Elena?

“Samahan ko na kayo sa table niyo Blair.” pagpiprisinta ni Sean sa tabi ko na hindi ko namalayang nandoon pa rin pala siya. Nakalimutan kong nasa tabi ko pa nga pala si Sean. Kinuha niya ang dala dala kong tray at siya na ang nagdala.

“Sigi, salamat.” I said, letting him get my tray dahil mabilis niya iyong dinampot at nakuha sa aking kamay kaya hindi na ako nakaangal pa.

Nagtungo na kami sa sarili naming table kanina. Hindi ko na binalingan pa ng tingin kung nasaan si Ace.

Nakakapagtaka namang nag iba agad ang mood niya. Maybe it’s just his reaction and I misunderstood it. But I’m sure that he looked pissed when he glanced at me before he left.

But then, thanks to him for saving us.

Kabanata 8

Kabanata 8

Change

The next day until the following days ’til it becomes a week, Sean is always with me and Maica. He’s being a good friend to me. However, I easily get fond of him. He’s talkative and a very compromising man.

Sinasamahan niya kami palagi kapag break time niya. And even his vacant subjects he spent it with me and Maica. I don’t know if it is because of her cousin ’Maica or about his feelings towards me that Maica told me before.

I don’t want to give meaning towards his actions. But I just can’t help it every time he held me his hand for help that I know that I don’t even need it.

“Blair, let me hand your bag and books.”  

He said it every time we headed to the cafeteria. He will take out his hand for my book and bag.

“No need Sean, thanks. Kaya ko na ito, hindi naman masyadong mabigat.” I will just only reply to him.

“Then at least give me your book. Let me carry it.” mapilit pa ring aniya.

“Sigi na Britney Clair. Tutulungan ka lang namang buhatin yung mga aklat mo. Pagbigyan mo na si couz.” nanunudyong ani pa ni Maica sa akin at saka bahagyang humagikgik sa tabi ko.

I blinked and think of it first. Kung tutuusin ay hindi ko na rin naman pa kailangang ibigay sa kaniya ang mga gamit ko dahil unang una ay hindi naman din ito sobrang bigat. And it’s my things, I can carry it my own.

Pero dahil mapilit si Maica sa akin at si Sean naman ay nakangiti at mabait na hinihintay ako…

“Uhm, sigi. Pero itong bag ako na, merienda ko lang naman ang laman nito.” nahihiyang sabi ko sa kay Sean na nakaabang sa akin. Iniabot ko sa kaniya ang dalawang aklat na medyo may kakapalan din naman kaya may pagka mabigat din.

“Okay, tayo na,” mayamaya ay sinabi ni Sean.

“Huh? What did you say, couz? Kayo na?” Tanong ni Maica na may namimilog na mga matang nakatingin sa pinsan at sa akin.

Natigilan naman ako sa sinabi niya. “H-Huh? Ano ka ba, Maica, what I mean is that ’let’s go and not what you are thinking.” Maagap na sagot ni Sean kay Maica na mukhang nalinawan naman sa sinabi ng kaniyang pinsan.

Ako naman ay napansin ang pag-iwas ng tingin ni Sean sa gawi ko. Bahagya pa siyang napakamot sa kaniyang batok bago ako binalingan ng tingin. Then he showed me a boyish smile after that.

We continued our walk until we reached the cafeteria and found a seat on a vacant table.

That was the first time I noticed his actions. I know that he is just being a gentleman to me but why when Maica was the one carrying a book, he didn’t asked her and offer for help. So I wondered. He also gave me some stuff and food that really made me uncomfortable but then I didn’t give it any meaning so I just see it as being part of his kind personality.

“Hey, Maica. Hello Blair.” nakangiting bungad ni Sean sa aming dalawa ni Maica nang lumabas kami ng classroom dahil tapos na ang huling klase namin sa araw na ito. Hapon na at uwian na ng mga estudyante.

“Hi, couz!  What are you doing here?” Nangingiting tanong ni Maica kay Sean na nakatayo ngayon sa harapan naming dalawa, saka ako binalingan ni Maica ng tingin na para bang may ideya ito kung bakit.

Nagtataka ko namang binalingan si Sean. Ang mga kamay nito ay nasa likuran niya. Napasulyap ako don nang mapansin iyon.

“Ah, I have something to give you, Blair.” He then uttered to me, without taking his stares off me.

“What is it?” Tanong ko sa kaniya ng may tipid na ngiti na nakaguhit sa aking labi, kahit na takang taka na rin ako.

Si Maica naman ay nakangiti lang din sa aking tabi at ginagalaw galaw ang isang kilay niya.

I then took my glance back at Sean in front of me. Tiningnan niya ako ng tuwid sa mga mata. Ngumiti siya ng pagka tamis tamis kalaunan. His eyes glisten and pinkish lips plastered a sporting smile. Saka inilabas ang isa niyang kamay na nasa likuran niya at ipakita sa akin kung anong mayroon don.

Saglit akong natigilan nang marinig ang ilang impit na hiyawan ng mga taong nakakakita sa amin. Hindi ko namalayan na nasa corridor pa pala kami kaya may mga kaeskuwela pa kaming dumadaan at napapatingin sa aming gawi.

“Omg! Chocolates are so sweet! Sean is so sweet!”

“Ang sweet naman ni kuya Sean para bigyan si Blair ng chocolates. Sana ako rin,” Dinig kong ani ng ilan kong kaklase na pinapanood na pala kami.

“Hala! Sila na ba?”

“Bagay naman sila ni kuya Sean. Guwapo si kuya and Blair is also pretty. So I’m not against it.”

“No, they are not good together. Baka gamitin lang niyang si Blair si kuya Sean, noh.”

“Akala mo kung sino ng maganda porque may nabibigay lang sa kaniya ng chocolates, tss, marami rin kami niyan sa bahay.”

“Grabe ka naman, Jade. Hindi naman namin tinatanong-”

“Heh! Kahit na, huwag niyo na ngang pansinin ’yan. Para chocolates lang manghang mangha na kayo.”

I heard some of my classmates shrieked and some are harshly talked behind my back. I didn’t pay attention to it. Mas marami pa rin naman kasi ang namangha at nagulat sa ibinigay sa akin ni Sean.

Nakangiti at masaya ko namang pinagmasdan ang isang basket ng tsokolate na iniabot sa akin ni Sean. Ang ganda ng pagkakalagay nito sa basket na may magarbong disenyo sa bawat gilid nito. It was sealed by clear plastic.

The chocolates appear not to come from locally. Pangalan pa lang halatang galing ibang bansa na ito. Nag-angat ako sa kaniya ng tingin.

“What for Sean?“nakangiti pero hindi parin nakatakas sa aking tinig ang kuryosidad at pagtataka.

He can’t just give me this basket of chocolates in front of so many. I feel uncomfortable about it actually lalo na at ang daming kuryosong kaklase namin ang nakatingin din sa amin ngayon.

“Wala naman. I just want to give it to you. Kakauwi lang nila Mama galing abroad so… naisipan lang kitang bigyan ng kaunting chocolate.” Aniya na may ngiti pa rin sa kaniyang mga labi. “Nabigyan ko na rin si Maica kahapon kasi nasa amin sila.” mabilis nitong dagdag sa sinabi niya kanina.

I still managed to smile at him, genuinely. “Salamat dito Sean. Masyadong marami ito baka hindi ko maubos. Pero salamat pa rin.”  I thanked him.

Hindi naman talaga ako mahilig sa matatamis kaya lalong lalo na sa mga chocolates. Pero tinanggap ko pa rin iyon dahil ayaw ko namang mag-isip siya ng iba kung bakit hindi ko tinanggap iyon. He said that her mom just came back from abroad and he just thinks of giving me some of their chocolates. I’m his friend and that is what I want to think of his reason.

He’s a good guy. And he’s a good friend too. So I don’t want to give him the benefit of the doubt. I’m just a year younger than him. And I’m not into fancy relationships. It’s also actually didn’t come up to my mind at this age. Kahit na sa batch naming ito ay may mga kaklase na akong may mga boyfriend and girlfriend.

I maybe have a crush on him because he’s handsome, tall, kind, and sweet but turning it into something more serious, into a relationship level. I don’t think so.

Dumaan ang dalawang buwan ko sa school and for the whole month of it is not a bit hectic. I also have few friends now. Syempre I’m still shocked to have that.

They treated me now differently unlike when I was in grade school and I was happy about that.

Mahiyain pa rin naman ako pero hindi na ganoong kagaya ng dati na mahilig iyuko ang ulo. Through, with the help of these few friends, I slowly started to build up my confidence.

They also help me out in my comfort zone. They said that the way I am before is kinda stiff so they want me to change it.

I admit that I also wanna try to change myself for what they want me to be. But it’s really hard. And thinking about myself being another version of me is terrifying.

Then I realize that time… Changes is constant. You don’t need to try changing yourself for others. What you need is acceptance from others for being who you truly are.

So if having these friends who want to change you for their own sake, para lang makibagay ka sa kanila, it’s a no-no. Have friends who will accept and bond with you in what your personality may be. And help you change for good not in a way of forcing you of doing such things that are not even part of you.

“Blair, malapit na pala ’yung intramurals natin ah. You need to prepare yourself na for that. Paniguradong naghahanda na rin ’yung ibang grade candidates para don.” Ani Maica sa akin kinaumagahan.

“Malapit na pala? Kelan daw ba?” Kinakabahang tanong ko sa kaniya dahil hindi ko alam kung dapat ko rin bang ituloy iyon lalo na at hindi ako sanay at panatag ni tumayo man lang ng entablado, paano pa kaya ito na pageant pa.

Kahit na nagkaroon na ako ng iilang mga kaibigan ay hindi parin ako sanay na humarap sa maraming tao. I still feel nervous every time I saw them stare on me.

I don’t think na kakayanin kong lumaban sa darating na intrams. I bite my lower lip and gaze at Maica who’s beside me reading her book here inside the library.

Nagbubulungan lang kami para hindi kami marinig ng librarian na nag uusap dahil paniguradong masisita kami nito at ang malala pa ay baka mapalabas pa kami ng wala sa oras. Masungit pa naman ang may katandaan ng ginang na librarian namin.

“Next month na. Last week of October gaganapin. Para after daw non ay sembreak na for at least a week.” mahinang sabi ni Maica sa akin.

I gasped as I glance at her. “Nahihiya ako Maica. Pwedeng iba nalang mag-represent ng section natin?” nag-aalala na talagang sabi ko sa kaniya.

I don’t know what to do. This is my first time joining a contest. And I’m not used to a big crowd.

Lalo na sa school namin. Most of the students here are from elite families and the other was from an old rich family.

Halos lahat mayayaman ang estudyante ng paaralan na ito. Ang mahal ng tuition nila at kung gusto mo talagang makapasok, they have a scholarship. You need to pass their over a thousand questions in their test. Eighty percent of your answers should be passed.

“Ano ka ba! You can do it! You are not only a pretty face, but you are also smart. And you need to use that to win this contest. Huwag kang mahiya.” She said to me reassuringly with a small smile on her lips.

I frowned at that thought. I’m so worried about the upcoming intramurals and my school works plus the projects that I need to submit on time.

“Five! six! five, six, seven, eight!” sigaw ng lalaking nagtuturo sa akin kung paano rumampa ng tama.

I tell my mom about me being the representative of our section in the pageant this coming intramural. Bukod sa hindi na ako pwedeng mag back-out ay nalaman na rin niya from my classroom adviser in school. Hindi naman na daw siya nagulat dahil sa ganda ko raw na ito ay hindi malabong hindi ako ang ipambato ng section namin.

When she heard about it, she then immediately called her trainer that she knows that it’s the best in this line. That can teach me a lot of things to learn about the pageant thing.

I’m happy because mom helps me to prepare everything I needed. From my instructor and now she’s busy with my gowns, etc. that I will need when the contest came. She actually seems more excited than me.

Hindi na rin naman ako nakatanggi sa guro namin dahil nahihiya rin akong magsabi kaya ayan at ako na talaga ang magiging representative.

I do a walk kanina because my trainer said that he wants to see how I walk. And base on my observation, he grimaced when he saw me walk into our living room.

Napangiwi rin ako dahil ganon nalang siguro ako kapangit maglakad. I have no actual poise, actually. I only walk freely with a short step because I used to it, shy and not to draw anything that they can pay me their attention. I don’t like it.

I’m wearing two inches heels as a beginner in doing a catwalk. I struggled to walk at first but then my trainer taught me to walk freely and how to sway my hips to see more of my curves. Even though I know that I don’t have.

I don’t actually care about my body figure because I know that I’m just a kid but when this contest came I’m started to be conscious.

Nagpatawag na rin kasi ng meeting kahapon para daw sa lahat ng contestant na kasali sa Mr. And Ms. Intramurals. And the all members are around fifteen and each has their pair so a total of thirty candidates overall.

The seniors look so matured. So their body figure is totally highlighted.

“That’s it for today Blair. You know some walks and I will teach you another sa next session natin. Just practice what we have done. I’m pretty sure you will make it perfect in time.” My trainer said to me.

“Sigi po, thank you.” I nodded my head and smiled at him.

Then he looked at my mom, saying his goodbye. I go upstairs after that and went inside my room to have cleaned up myself.

Saglit pa akong tumitig sa kawalan nang sumagi sa aking isipan si Ace. Matagal ko na rin siyang hindi nakikita simula nang mag-iba ang schedule nila this second grading namin. Not that I want to see him frequently, it’s just that I feel like he sometimes made my day at school. The last time we had interaction with each other was about the umbrella he offered me. That’s it and after that is when he helped us with Elena’s commotion. It happened a few months ago already. Maybe he’s get preoccupied with his studies. He’s on senior high and I know that he’s on top.

But then, when I remember the upcoming intramurals pageant, part of me started to feel the thrill and uneasiness whenever I think of him together with the crowds watching me up on stage.

I suddenly feel so shy and my heart began to race every time I think of it. I need to practice and take this seriously dahil ayaw kong mapahiya. Ayaw kong mapahiya lalo na kapag alam kong manonood siya.

This day tired me of practice and school. Thinking about Ace in my mind exhausts me more in worried. I lie down myself in my bed until the tiredness I felt turned into a deep sleep.

Kabanata 9

Kabanata 9

Girlfriend

The first class for today was dismissed. Maica pulled me and I found myself in front of the cafeteria.

“What are we doing here? “ I asked her out of my curiosity.

“Duh! Kakain, ano pa ba?” pilosopong sagot nito sa akin.

“Okay,”  I simply uttered like it was normal to me. Even I find it weird. She’s not like this, anyway.

And now she was dragging me here in front of our school cafeteria. Weird?

Pumasok na kami sa loob and of course the usual, they turn their heads on us. Naiilang man sa ilang mga tingin nila sa aming gawi ay hindi ko nalang binigyan ng pansin. Marahil ay sa nangyaring pagtulong sa amin ni Ace nung nakaraan kaya ngayon ay pinagtitinginan nila kami.

We sat on the vacant table near the end of the row of tables on the right side of this huge school cafeteria.

“What do you want to eat? “ Maica then asked me as I roam my eyes on the other tables.

I look at her and raised my brows. Like I was asking what she just said.

Her forehead creased.

“Sabi ko, baka kako may gusto kang pagkain?” pagtatanong nitong muli sa akin.

“Why? Libre mo?” I asked and a smile plastered on my lips.

Napanguso siya. She looked up as she seriously thinking about what I’ve said.

I was about to say that ’I’m just kidding when she suddenly spoke.

“Sure! So anong gusto mo?” she benevolently asked.

“Are you sure? That’s new…” I was in shock. My eyes widened and my mouth was drawn in small ‘o’.

She never wants to make libre to others even to me. She was a kind of girl na super thrifty, kaya ganito nalang din ang naging reaksyon ko.

“Yes. Ayaw mo ba?” nakataas ang kilay na anito sa akin.

“Who would reject your offer?! Your so thrifty kaya.” I merrily announced to her.

“Ah-huh, and you’re the lucky one I guess,” she murmured.

I chuckled softly at that and smile at her softly later on.

“I want some slices of pizza and a fruit shake. That’s all.” I excitedly said what I want.

“Yun lang? Akala ko pa naman dadamihan mo na yung order mo kasi alam mo na, minsan lang ako manlibre ’di mo pa nilubos!” Natatawang aniya.

“I’m not that greedy, Maica,” I uttered softly on her.

She gives me a teasing smile. I just frowned at that. Then later on she turned her back on me and started walking towards the counter to get in line.

Napangiti nalang ako at napailing dahil sa pinag gagawa niya.

Maica was a good friend. She always helped me with everything. I am so thankful to finally have someone like her. A girl friend that we can talk about things we can both relate to.

I excitedly looked at her way slowly walking towards me. Hawak ang isang tray na puno ng pagkain.

“Thank you for the food,” I said while I was looking at the snacks she bought for me.

She just smirked at me.

“Hey girls! Can I join you here?” Napalingon ako sa pinagmulan ng boses na iyon.

Sean came and smiled sweetly at me when I turn my gaze on him. Seems like he’s just out for his morning subject.

“Can I, Blair?” He directly asked me.

I blinked. “Sure, maraming binili si Maica na pagkain baka hindi namin maubos. You can join us.” I granted at him. He then beams a boyishly smile at me.

“Ikaw magbabayad niyan Sean ah!” Maica teasingly informed him.

“Huh? Akala ko ba nabili mo na?” Tanong ni Sean na saglit pang natigilan habang ang ngiti ay hindi nabubura sa kaniyang mga labi.

“Alam ko kasing darating ka, so I take that advantage para um-order ng pagkain. Nakalista to’ng mga foods under your name so don’t forget to pay it when you finish your snack, couz. So for now, let’s just enjoy our food!” natatawang ani Maica kay Sean.

Napakurap kurap pa ako saglit sa sinabi ni Maica at pinagmasdan ang iba’t ibang klase ng pagkaing nasa table namin ngayon. It was so many that even I, cannot exhaust.

“Akala ko pa naman inilibre mo na ako. Yun pala pinsan mo magbabayad.” I then uttered to Maica and grimaced afterward.

Bahagya naman siyang ngumiti sa akin na patungo na sa pag-ngiwi. “You know naman Blair na nagtitipid ako right? So maybe next time nalang yung real treat ko sa’yo,” she said then started eating her food.

Napailing iling nalang ako. Then I chuckled softly.

Sanay na ako sa ganiyang kakulitan ni Maica. Minsan lang talaga hindi ko alam kung kailan susumpong yung pagka oportunista niya when it comes to her cousin.

We start eating when Sean spoke.

“Mamaya na ba yung practice n’yo para sa pageant sa darating na intramurals?” he asked then bite his pizza on his hand.

Bumaling ako sa kaniya. “Ah oo. Mamayang three PM ang call time.” I replied to him.

“Anong oras kayo matatapos?”

“Hindi ko pa alam e’. Siguro by five PM tapos na.” I muttered in uncertainty and shrugged.

“So mauuna na akong umuwi o hihintayin pa kita?” Maica asked.

“No. You can go home. I told my driver naman na to wait for me in the parking lot.” Nakangiting sabi ko sa kaniya.

“I can wait.” Sean immediately announced.

I looked at him with my eyes widen a fraction.

“Hindi na kailangan Sean.” nahihiyang ani ko sa kaniya.

“May gagawin din naman ako mamaya at baka matagalan ako. At kung matapos ako ng maaga, pupuntahan nalang kita sa gymnasium para sabay na tayo pauwe.” Nakangiting anito sa akin.

Nahihiyang tumango na lamang ako sa sinabi niya. Ngumiti naman siya at pinagpatuloy na namin ang pagkain.

Lunch came and passed. Until it’s three in the afternoon. I go to our school gym with Mikko, the escort in our room. He’s gonna be my partner in the runway on stage.

“I’m done doing the flag nga pala para sa parade,” he said as he broke the silence between us.

Tiningnan ko lang siya at nginitian. It’s good to hear that he finished it earlier.

I’m not closed to Mikko at hindi rin naman kami masyadong nag-uusap. He’s good-looking and he’s one of the heartthrobs in our batch. He’s notorious to be exact. Even Micah admits that she is attracted to him. But I find him not in my eyes. Maybe he’s just not my type.

We reached the entrance of the gymnasium and already saw some students there. Must be the other candidates. Pumasok na rin kami. I saw some men on stage who would guide us for the practice.

“Kayo na ba lahat ng candidates?” may pagka istriktong tanong nito sa aming mga nandito na.

“Yes, ito napo lahat.” Sagot ng Student Council President namin.

“Okay, let’s start na para maaga tayong matapos.”

At first, I feel awkward and shy dahil hindi ko alam ang gagawin. But then nang sundan ko lang ang sinasabi at ginagawa ng instructor ay nakuha ko naman agad.

Tinawag nila ang bawat section kada grade levels. At napansin kong hindi um-attended ang ibang candidates. I also did not see Elena here with us. She really is competitive in this contest so why would she back out.

Napabaling ang lahat sa entrance ng gymnasium nang makita naming paparating palang si Elena kasama ang mga alagad nito.

“Hoy ikaw girl! Bilisan mo naman at huwag kang babagal bagal mag lakad d’yan! Late ka na nga ang bagal mo pang maglakad!” The gay instructor shouted at her at the entrance of the gymnasium.

I saw how Elena’s brows furrowed at that. She is now near on stage at huminto siya nang marating na niya ang kinaroroonan namin. We are in front of the stage.

“Who are you to say those words?! Baka hindi mo ako kilalang bakla ka? Don’t you ever say that I’m mabagal kung ayaw mong mawalan ng trabaho. Ako ang masusunod kung maaga akong darating o hindi and you have nothing to say on it.” Elena’s exclaimed in a remark on them both.

“Gaga ka bakla! Apo ’yan ng may-ari ng eskuwelahan na ito.” bulong ng isang bading na katabi nito na halatang kinakabahan na rin.

Napansin kong mapalunok siya sa sinabi ng kasamahan niya. And then, later on, I saw them both shaking. Frightened by Elena’s words.

“G-Gano’n ba? Pasensya na. Pwede naman po kaming hindi muna mag-umpisa kapag wala pa kayo. Pasensya na po talaga.” napapayuko at kinakabahan pang anito.

Elena just raised her left brow on them who looks frightened now.

“Ang ganda niyo po pala sa malapitan. You can enter the showbusiness if you wanted.” nahihiyang singit pa ng isang bakla kay Elena.

Nagsitigil na rin sa bulungan ang iba ng mapansing nag-iba agad ang mood ni Elena dahil sa papuring sinabi nito sa kaniya.

“I know! And you should better know your place! Let’s start! Ayaw kong umuwi ng gabi!” Elena then exclaimed but the smug smile on her lips plaster proudly.

But when I saw Elena caught my way, her lips pursed and she glared at me with annoyance. Nagtataka naman akong umiwas ng tingin sa kaniya.

Nag break muna kami sandali para makapag pahinga. Habang si Elena naman ay ina-assist na sa mga tinuro sa amin kanina nang wala siya. Tinuro pa lang sa amin ang magiging puwesto namin at kung saan maglalakad at pupwesto para mag pose.

And of course, Elena the bida. She’s in the center of all as she wishes in the production and the instructor commanded what she wanted.

Mayamaya pa ay pumasok ang ilang mga seniors sa loob ng gymnasium. And I was stunned when I saw his menacing eyes on me. I looked away and suddenly panicked.

It almost a weeks passed the last time I saw him. I heard that the senior was busy in their second sem. So they have a hard time with their subjects and term papers. Especially this third sem they will gonna have a thesis and research kaya malabong makita ko siya.

“Hi, Ace!” Elena called her sweetly to get his attention.

Ace glance at her and suddenly looked away later on.

“Ay gwapings! Ang sarap naman nitong mga batang ito! Este you guys are dropped dead handsome.” the gay mischievously said just behind Elena.

Nagtawanan naman ang ilang seniors na nakarinig. Si Ace at ang dalawang kaibigan niyang si Jayden at Alex lang ang lalaking seniors na nandito.

Napangisi naman si Ace nang marinig niya iyon.

“Ay jusko! Mga estudyante pa ba talaga kayo boys?!” naghihisteryang sabi pa ng isang bading na naglakad palapit sa kanila.

The gay stared at them, surveying every part of them. I noticed that Ace seems to be indulgent and his friends as well.

“Ang creepy mo bakla! Halika nga rito mga bagets pa ’yan, hoy! “ sigaw nito sa kasamahan niya.

But when I noticed Ace took a glance on my way. I hardly tried to composed my body even deep inside me, I’m shaking. Especially when I saw Ace approaching me. My heart throbs and my eyes started to panicked.

I gulped the lump at the back of my throat when he’s getting nearer each second.

“Ace come here I have something for you!” Elena suddenly said then clung her bands on Ace’s arm.

He looked at Elena with asking eyes. Then he lowered his gaze down to his arms where Elena’s hands clung.

“What is it?” I heard Ace asked her in a serious tone.

Malapit na siya sa aking gawi dahil nandito lang rin naman ako sa harapan ng stage malapit. As well as Elena.

“Come with me and I’ll show you,”  Elena muttered on him in a flirtatious way.

I looked away when I felt my heart thumped.

“Ace! Nariyan ka lang pala, kanina pa kita hinahanap.” sabi ng isang babaeng kadarating lang na mabilis na nakakuha ng aking atensyon.

She’s beautiful and she’s on Ace’s age. She approached Ace at napamaang ng makita si Elena na nakakapit sa braso nito.

Ace tried to remove Elena’s arm that was holding him. The woman in front of them just silently watching Elena’s way. Her brows met and her forehead creased a bit.

Inalis ni Elena sa pagkaka-angkla ng braso nito kay Ace at mataray na hinarap ang babaeng tumawag kay Ace na ngayon ay tahimik siyang pinagmamasdan.

“I’m looking for you as well, Lisa.” Ace said at the woman when he finally faces her way nang tuluyang maalis ang kamay ni Elena sa kaniyang braso.

“Oh, just wait for me there malapit na rin naman kaming matapos,” Lisa said sweetly to Ace.

Elena rolled her eyes and walked out when she noticed that she’s being a standee there.

“Girlfriend ba ’yan ni kuya Ace?” I heard the girl asked just near my way. She’s just beside me and I saw her curious glared on Ace’s way.

“Maybe. Sabi nila, Ate Lisa confessed her feelings towards Kuya Ace kaya baka sila na nga. Bagay rin naman sila.” the girl answered her.

I blinked and took a glance on their way. Nakita kong sabay pang maglakad si Ace at Lisa patungong bleachers kasama ang dalawa pa niyang kaibigan na si Jeydon at Alex.

Naalis lang ang tingin ko sa kanilang dalawa nang marinig ang pamilyar na boses sa aking tabi.

“You done?”

“Sean… Ah, sorry, hindi pa kami tapos eh. But you can go na if you want.” nahihiyang sabi ko sa kaniya na hindi ko namalayan ang paglapit sa aking gawi.

“I’m okay, I can wait for you. It’s still early pa naman. Nauna na si Maica kanina hindi na siya nakapag paalam sayo.” he informed me.

“Mm, sigi ikaw ang bahala.” Ani ko at tipid siyang binigyan ng ngiti.

“Aba! mukhang may love birds pa dito ah. Later na yan at umpisahan na ang rehearsal para makauwi na kayo ng maaga!” ani ng bading ng bumaling sa amin.

Nahihiya ko namang tiningnan si Sean. I felt my cheeks flushed. So I slightly bowed my head to hide my face.

Ilang sandali pa muna niya akong pinagmasdan na mas lalo sa aking nagparamdam ng hiya. Hindi na rin naman siya nagtagal at naramdaman kong umalis na rin siya pagkatapos.

We practice some basic steps for the introduction. Thank god that I can dance a bit. At first, I hesitantly moved my body together with the beat but then nakisama na rin ako kalaunan at sinubukang kalimutan ang hiyang nararamdaman.

Nagulat naman ako nang makitang bigay na bigay sa pagsayaw si Elena sa kaniyang pwesto sa gitna.

She moved her hips sexily. I saw how Ace’s friends turned their gaze on her. Ani mong nang-aakit ito sa paraan ng kaniyang paggalaw sa ritmo ng tugtog.

Napabaling naman ako ng tingin kay Ace kalaunan. And when I feel my heart jumped, I gulped hard and dance slightly. I felt shy when I saw him watching me. Naging mas mabagal at tipid ang naging pagsabay ko sa tugtog dahil tanaw at ramdam ko pa rin ang mga titig niyang hindi inaalis sa akin.

I shook my head at that. I focused on our production number para mawala iyon sa aking isipan.

We do the stants that they taught us. We all walk and do the ramp confidently on the stage. And when it’s my turn to walk I stand straight, chin up and chest out like what my instructor at home said to me.

I started walking in the middle alone, leaving Mikko at my back when I saw Ace watching me below the stage with the glint in his eyes.

I struggled to walk when I noticed him lifted his glare on me. I looked away and try to compose myself para hindi ako mapahiya. I hardly focused and ignore his stares and presence below the stage where I’m having my ramp.

Natapos ko naman iyon nang hindi ako nadudulas o natatapilok. I let a sigh, thank god for that.

“Okay, girls! You did a great job today. Next time nalang namin ituturo yung next na gagawin n’yo. And dito ulit yung meeting place and same time pa rin. Packed up your things kasi dumidilim na.” ani ng nagtuturo sa amin habang pumapalakpak ang kamay, to get our attention.

Napalingon naman ako sa mga bleachers at mabilis na nahagip ng aking paningin si Sean na palapit na sa akin ngayon. He approached me and get my things. He really is waited for me.

I used to him carrying my stuff. I don’t wanna fight for a small help that he insisted so I decided to let him do that.

At nang palabas na rin kami, I saw Ace walking with his girl outside the gymnasium. I looked away and ignore them. Binalingan ko si Sean na kanina pa pala nakatitig sa akin.

“I bought you a bottle of water.” He then said to me.

Inabot niya sa akin ang isang cold water na may kasama pang biscuits. I get that and smile at him.

“Thank you,”

Hindi na rin kami nagtagal ron at umalis na kami ni Sean. Hinatid niya ako sa parking lot papunta sa kotse namin.

He said his goodbye and I said to him my thank you’s as well dahil hinintay niya talaga ako para may makasabay ako sa pag-uwi. I go home late and I tell Mom earlier that we have our first practice for the preparation in the school pageant. So she would not be worried about me.

I entered my room with my mind full of amusement.

Ace is staring at me kanina. And I find it uncomfortable. So why he keeps on glaring at me? And hey, I think he’s there for his batchmate representative.

Is that his girlfriend? The woman looked matured, halata rin iyon sa hubog ng pangangatawan niya. Gano’n kaya ang mga tipo niya sa isang babae?

For sure it is! They look like they were in a relationship. It’s obvious that Ace was there for her.

It feels sucks that I’m thinking of him kahit na hindi naman dapat. But I just can’t help it. Ilang araw ko rin siyang hindi nakita and now that I saw him, he has a rumored girlfriend.

I let a heavy sigh as I shook my head in that thought. I shouldn’t be thinking of him. Ano ngayon if Lisa was his girlfriend? Bagay naman daw sila.

And the bitterness suddenly dripped on me. Is she really his girlfriend? If yes, I have nothing to do with it, but then I feel my chest tighten about it.

Kababata 10

Kabanata 10

Being gentleman

“Blair how was your practice yesterday? I heard dumating daw sila Kuya Ace ro’n kasama sila Kuya Jayden and Alex.” Maica said and grinned.

She looked so excited to hear me say that…

“Yep. They came when the end of the practice.” I responded to her.

I looked at my notebook and continue writing on it.

I and Maica were in the library for our assignment. We decided to do it today even tomorrow morning pa ang submission.

Maica shrieked. I looked at her and cover her mouth to stop her giggling wails.

The librarian might hear her so I covered her mouth.

Pero ang magulo at makulit na ito ay nagpatuloy pa rin. Napakamot nalang ako sa aking noo nang huminto rin siya sa impit na pag tili.

I shook my head then looked at her.

“Stop it Maica! Baka palabasin tayo ng librarian niyan eh!” Paimpit kong ani sa kaniya.

She just looked at me and pouted her lips.

“What?“dagdag na tanong ko pa rito.

“Dapat pala hinintay nalang din kita para nakita ko din sila Kuya Ace. By the way, I heard na may girlfriend na raw si Kuya Ace? Lisa was the name of the lucky girl as I remember.” she said like she was envied Lisa for being Ace’s girlfriend.

“Ah-huh. Yun ata yung pinunta niya kahapon sa gymnasium. How did you know?” I said then inquired nonchalantly.

“You know how fast the rumor can pervade in the internet, girl. Especially that Kuya Ace is a handsome man. Actually, he’s more like a Greek god. And every girl in his batch wants him to be their boyfriend. Who wouldn’t want a Ventura who has the looks and the money! I mean he has everything kaya lahat ay pinapangarap siya.” she said as her hand lifted through her cheeks like she was dreaming about his gorgeous man of his life.

Well, she’s right. Ace was so high compared to us.

He’s like the moon in my night sky that I just looked up in above. Amazed by his looks. Looking at him from afar. Never get nearer from where he was.

Can I even touch him? He’s way older than me. Will I be her friend if I approached him?

Maybe not. He can’t even notice me from afar. Marami nga sa kaniyang nagkakagusto na kaedad niya na hindi niya man lang matingnan, ako pa kayang bata lang sa pningin niya.

I turned my gazes on Maica and chuckled a bit. She glared at me wondering.

“What’s funny? I have just stated the fact Blair!” she exclaimed like she feels ashamed.

I stood up on my chair and covered her mouth again, stopping her.

“I was just chuckling because you looked like a little princess dreaming for her prince,” I said to her for stopping her in her loud voice.

She sighed. Looks like defeated. Her shoulder shrugged.

“Well, fortunately, someone tried to court me and I said yes,” she said like it was nothing.

I was shocked at what she just said. My mouth was parted while my jaw dropped.

“For real?” I asked curiously.

“Yes! Ano akala mo sa akin, pangit? Hoy, maganda kaya ako! Maganda ’tong genes namin kaya dapat gwapo maging boyfriend ko.” she bragged like I insulted her by my question.

“No! What I mean is that we are just in grade seven, yet you let someone courted you?” I asked her in a whispering way.

Napansin ko namang napatingin sa amin ang ilang nasa loob ng library kaya hininaan ko ang boses ko.

“Age doesn’t matter, duhh. So what kung grade seven palang tayo? It’s just a puppy love kaya it’s okay to explore. No harm Blair trust me.” she said nonchalantly.

I shook my head at that.

We fixed our things after we finished our homework. Yes, we finished it even Maica was so noisy.

I was walking with her out of the library when someone approached her near the doorway. I looked at them curiously.

Is that her manliligaw? I smirked. May taste din pala talaga ang isang ’to.

“Ah… Blair, can I leave na? May pupuntahan lang kami nitong suitor ko.” she shyly said to me with her eyes looked apologetically.

Tiningnan ko pa muna siya saglit at ang lalaking nasa harapan namin ngayon. He looks like Sean’s age. A year older on us.

“Sigi, ako nalang muna ang pupunta mag-isa sa cafeteria.”

“Sorry talaga, may sorpresa raw kasi siya eh.” he pointed the guy in front of her.

“Maybe Sean will gonna be there since malapit naring matapos yung last subject nila. Sasamahan ka naman non.” She added.

“Okay,” I just simply said then nod my head to say that it was fine with me.

They leave me there alone so I started to walk towards the cafeteria. Maica looks so happy when the guy came to her. Maybe she’s right that there is no wrong being courted by someone.

Napatigil ako sa pag iisip nang makita ko si Ace na naglalakad din papasok ng cafeteria.

I walked to the entrance of the cafeteria when the turbulent students came out. I stopped, waiting for them to exit.

My forehead creased when I see Ace in my peripheral vision that is now beside me. He also halted from walking in. Doing the same thing as me, waiting for the student to come out first.

And when the entrance has space, I continue walking but I felt Ace walk together with me. So I stop once again para paunahin siya. Nakita niyang papasok din ako kaya huminto rin siya.

I looked at him with shamefaced. 

He lowered his gazes to level on me. He’s tall and my height was just on his shoulder.

“You go first.” his low baritone voice said.

I gasped. “N-No, you can go first.” Kinakabahang sabi ko pa sa kaniya.

He then chuckled boyishly. My lips parted when I heard him chuckling.

“You should go first. I’m being gentleman here.” he insisted.

Being gentleman? Uhm, well, that is what boys are doing anyway.

“O-Okay thanks,” I said stutteringly without glancing at him this time.

Nauna akong naglakad sa kaniya at naramdaman ko naman ang presensya niyang nakasunod sa aking likuran.

I feel shy to see him and talk to me that way. I feel delighted as well as heated when his serious eyes directed on me. Pakiramdam ko ay yung huling pag-uusap pa namin ay yung isinauli ko ang payong sa kaniya.

Mabilis akong lumiko patungo sa pila at hindi ko inasahang do’n din ang kaniyang tungo. I bit my lower lip as I think of him on my back. At nang mapaatras ang mga lalaking nasa aking harapan ay muntik na akong mapaatras kay Ace.

I glance at him when I felt his hand caught my back. His eyes were on me as my lips in purse. I swallowed hard.

“Careful,” aniya sa mahina at mababang tono.

“Sorry, Kuya Ace, miss pasensya na.” The boys in front of us said when they see me bump against them.

Natauhan naman ako at mabilis na humiwalay kay Ace.

“A-Ayos lang,” I just simply uttered without looking at them.

I ordered my food and found a vacant table to get away from Ace’s way. Kinakabahan at hindi ako kumportable sa tuwing alam kong nasa paligid lang siya. Lalo na at nasa aking likuran ko siya kanina.

Nagmamadali at mabilis ang naging paghakbang ko patungo sa bakanteng lamesa nang maiabot sa akin ang tray. And when I saw Sean roaming his eyes around nang makaupo ako. I raised my hand for him to see me as I sat on my chair.

He smiled when he saw me. He then approached me with the tray in his hands.

The smile on his lips was the first thing I notice when he approached my table. He then took his sit on the chair in front of me.

“Why are you alone? Where’s Maica? Why she’s not here with you?” he asked as he started to open his food.

“She’s with her suitor—” napatigil ako sa susunod kong sasabihin ng bigla siyang nasamid sa kaniyang pagkain.

I hurriedly open his bottle of water and gave it to him.

“Are you alright?” I asked him worriedly.

He wiped the dripping water from his mouth when he drunk it hurriedly. Then he spoke.

“Yes, thank you. Where is Maica?” He asked me once again, darkly.

Nagtataka naman akong sumagot sa kaniya.

“With his suitor?” I hesitantly replied.

“Why would she have that thing? She’s still young for courting kinds of stuff.” He whispered. He looks annoyed. Pissed at the same time.

I shrugged my shoulders and didn’t speak.

“By the way, hihintayin kita ulit mamaya after ng practice niyo,” he pronounced.

I looked at him with my brows shot up.

“Why? You have something important to do again?” I asked him innocently.

Lumaki ng bahagya ang mga mata niya na parang nagulat sa aking sinabi.

“Yup. So I will wait for you again para sabay na tayo palabas ng school,” he stated like it should be normal to me, then continue eating his food.

“Okay,” I muttered breathily.

There’s nothing wrong naman siguro if he waits for me again. Kaso ay hindi ba nakakaabala sa kaniya? But he said that he has something important to do, kaya baka ayos nga lang talaga sa kaniya.

The practice came that noon and we started pronto when Elena came early.

“So ganito ang magiging ayos niyo sa casual wear. Don’t forget your position girls and boys para hindi kayo mapahiya” The gay informed us.

Nagsi-tanguan naman ang mga kasamahan ko as they agreed to it. They looked so professional in this kind of pageant. I noticed how these girls seem so serious on it. So competitive to win this pageant.

I also wanted to win this, so I will do my very best. The senior high candidates are tall and looked so elegant by their posture and body built. Sa tindig pa lang nila ay mukhang isa na sa kanila ang mananalo.

But the junior high also appears to be competitive as well. Some of them are matured lalo na sa mga grade nine and ten. So they had a fought against the seniors.

But how about us? However, grade seven and eight candidates looked so cute. We are not that matured enough by the body but we are also tall. We have also those unidentified curves.

Even Elena who’s in grade eight looks like a grade ten student.

Me, I may not tall like Elena but I’m enough to say that my body looked matured than my real age.

The instructor declared our breaktime.

Last practice na namin tomorrow kaya tinuturo na sa amin lahat ngayon. Because next week will be the intramurals will hold.

Everyone seems so excited. The candidates already prepared their dresses and hired their own make-up artist for the event.

I don’t know if Mom already done with my clothes but I trusted and give her that part.

She says that I don’t need to worry about anything except in my practice. She says that I need to improve my walk and to start building my confidence.

“Oh, nandito nanaman yung mga boys!” sigaw ng instructor namin habang naglalakad palapit kila Ace kasama ang dalawang kaibigan nito.

“Hey, candidates!” Jayden greeted as he waves his hand on the ladies on the left side of the bleachers.

“Ay jusko! Why so yummy! Grr!”

“Ano ka ba bakla tumigil ka nga riyan at baka mawalan pa tayo ng trabaho niyan sa ginagawa mo eh!” saway sa kaniya ng kasamahan niya.

I am now on the other side of the bleachers while I was only glancing at their way. I looked at Ace who approached Lisa.

Lisa stood up and run towards Ace. Agad nitong inangkla ang kaniyang kamay sa braso ni Ace. Nagtataka naman akong napatingin do’n. They looked sweet together. Maybe they really are together.

Lisa is a pretty girl. So why not? He’s Ace’s type. She has the big in front and a body like a royal bottle. She’s also one of the representatives of their batch. Though, I haven’t pay attention to her in our every practice.

Marahang hinawakan nito ang braso ni Ace pababa. I winced at that. I looked away when I can’t take their view anymore.

I feel like something in my heart collapsed. I don’t know this feeling so I looked at the entrance instead, to get away from my sight on them. And when I saw Maica and Sean walking towards me the smile suddenly plastered on my lips.

Maica hugged me and I embrace her back.

“How was your practice? Patapos na ba?” She asked me happily while her eyes glint with naughtiness.

“Yeah. Malapit na.” I answered and turned my gaze to Sean.

“Hey! Are you done working on something?” Tanong ko.

He looked at me with a stern expression. I even saw how his ears turned into red color. Napayuko siya ng bahagya at napakamot sa kaniyang batok.

“Yup. Kakatapos ko lang.” He said without gazing at me.

“Uy Sean, anong nangyayari sayo? Bakit ka namumula? “ Maica asked her worriedly.

“Oo nga? Bat ka namumula Sean?” nagtataka na ring tanong ko sa kaniya nang mapansing namumula ang maputing kutis nito.

Napailing iling lang siya at sabay iwas ng tingin sa amin.

Napaiwas din ako ng tingin at nahagilap ng mga mata ko ang gawi nila Ace. Nahuli kong nakatingin siya akin pero agad ding nag-iwas.

“That was Lisa I’m telling you kanina.” Ani Maica sa aking tabi nang mapansin ang aking pinagmamasdan.

I took my gazes away from them and glance at Maicah beside me instead.

“Yeah, I know her.” Simpleng ani ko sa kaniya.

“Kasali pala siya sa pageant? Paniguradong inspired ’yan kaya galingan mo Blair ah! Huwag kang magpapatalo lalo na sa Elena na ’yon.” She spatted.

I bit my lip and just nod at her.

“Oh, you’re here!” nagugulat kunwareng ani ni Elena kay Maica na kanina ko pa naman napansing nakatingin sa aming gawi.

“Oo nandito ako. Hindi mo ba ako nakikita? Huh? Bulag ka ba?” Maica mockingly said to her.

Elena just rolled her eyes irritatedly at us. “How pathetic. Akala mo ba mananalo ’yang kaibigan mo? Asa ka pa! She will never win this contest.” she fired on my friend.

Maica didn’t move. “Huh! Ikaw ang umasa dahil paniguradong hindi ka makakapasok ng top three!” ngingisi ngisi pang sabi ni Maica rito.

I hold Maica’s arm to stop her. She’s too preoccupied kaya hindi niya napapansin na napapatingin na sa gawi namin ang ibang tao.

“Look who’s talking? Coming from an old rich family na umaasa lang naman sa yaman ng ninuno nila!” Elena shouted at her.

I tighten my hold on Mica’s arm when Elen’s word became something deep and personal.

“How dare you insult me! You bitch! Whore!” Maica exclaimed at her.

When she was about to come near Elena, Sean obstructs her way, stopping her to do something we will regret later on.

“Huwag mo ng patulan, Maica. Mas lalo ka lang niyang hindi titigilan kapag pinatulan mo pa.” Sean whispered at his cousin.

“Maica, hayaan mo na siya. Baka kung ano pang mangyari sa’yo. Huwag mo nalang patulan.” Mahina at nag-aalalang sabi ko sa kaniya.

She rolled her eyes and just shut it harshly. Halatang nagpipigil ng kaniyang galit.

“Hmm, wala ka naman pala eh.” Elena hissed. “Bye Blair. Good luck nalang sa’yo kung manalo ka,” she uttered with her evil smirked on me.

Tinignan ko na lang siya saglit. At hindi na binigyang pansin pa. Umalis na rin siya at inanunsiyong tapos na ang practice at bukas nalang daw ulit magkita kita.

I looked away and saw Ace looking at me curiously. I felt my heart jumped a bit so I then immediately looked away.

Hindi na rin kami nagtagal at umalis na kami nila Maica and Sean sa gymnasium ng magkakasabay.

I still remember how he glared at me. It looks foreign. There is something in his serious menacing eyes that I can’t tell if what’s in it.

“Blair! Dito na kami, nandyan na rin naman yung sundo mo. Goodbye na!” Maica uttered and hugged me for her farewell.

“Ah, oo sigi. Take care!” I looked at them as I entered inside our car.

My mind was allured and busy contemplating things about Ace. About his serious glares on me. The way he spoke and how he said he’s being a gentleman on me earlier.

But when Lisa’s image came up to my mind. I suddenly shook my head off to get away from thinking of him.

Kabanata 11

Kabanata 11

Dinner

It’s sunday morning when I woke up because of the beam of sunlight that coming from the window in my room.

I stared at the ceiling. Kinusot ko ang aking mga mata. Hinawi ko ang buhok kong tumatabing sa aking mukha.

Sa Wednesday na gaganapin ang Mr. And Ms. Intramurals so I need to prepare for that special day. I stood up out of my bed. I wear my comfy slipper and went to the bathroom.

I checked myself in the mirror. Then I take a bath after. Lumabas na ako ng bathroom at saka tinungo ang vanity mirror. There were I combed my hair after I blew dry it. Then later on I decided to went out of my room at tinungo ang salas. Naabutan ko si mommy na may kausap sa telepono.

“Yeah… yeah. We need it within this week kaya sana sa Tuesday morning ma-i-deliver n’yo na rito iyan. Alright, thanks.” Mom said to the other line then she ended the call.

Nakatayo siya malapit sa mga couch. And when she turned on my way, she caught me in her eyes. Ngumiti siya ng pagkatamis tamis.

“Hey sweetie, have you eat your breakfast?” Mom asked as she approached me.

She gave me a hugged and greeted her with good mornings. I welcomed her and say my good morning as well.

“Hindi pa po. Kagigising ko lang rin Mom.” I said then looked around.

“Gano’n ba? Halika at sasamahan na kita sa kusina para makakain ka na. I prepared your food earlier kasi akala ko maaga kang magigising para makapaghanda ka na sa contest mo at darating ang instructor mo today. So feed yourself now and prepared everything, okay?” she said as we walk towards our dining area.

I sipped on my glass. Mom cooked so many foods for breakfast. And it’s all my favorite. She’s so thoughtful for doing this.

I looked at her amused and she just smiled at me sweetly.

“I know you need energy for today so I cooked all your favorites for breakfast.” She then grinned at me.

“Thanks, Mom.” I winked at her and started eating my bacon, sausages, omelet, and many more foods that mom prepared for me.

Kinuha ko ang toasted bread at saka ito kinain. Mom is just there watching me while I’m eating.

“Kumain na kayo Mom?” I asked her when I noticed that she’s only sitting, watching me with a smile plaster on his lips.

“Yes, tapos na all sweetie. I ate together with your Dad earlier, kaso maaga rin siyang umalis para sa trabaho,” she said then stood up from her seat.

I shifted my gaze on her. “Eat well sweetie. May gagawin lang muna ako sa study room, just call me when you need anything.” I nodded at her as she turned her back palabas ng dining room.

I finished my food. Manang Soling washed the dishes because she insisted. I even tried to compel her na ako nalang ang maghuhugas ng pinagkainan ko kaso ay sinabi niyang siya na lamang at alam niyang may gagawin pa ako, so I let her.

Naglakad ako patungo sa pasilyo ng bahay namin when I heard the doorbell rung.

Pumunta ako sa labas para tingnan kung sino iyon. At nagugulat akong napatingin sa babaeng nakabungisngis sa labas ng gate nang pagbuksan iyon ng guard namin.

I hurriedly walked towards our gate when I saw Maica there.

“Oh my gosh, girl! Ready ka na ba para sa Wednesday?” She asked me while we’re still hugging each other.

“Hindi parin ako handa e,” I said as I looked at her and pouted my lips.

Napangisi naman siya sakin.  “That’s why I’m here nga ’di ba? Come on, I know you can do it!” masayang anito sa akin.

We entered our house and I called mom that my friend is here. I introduced Maica to her and she looked happy that I am now having friends.

“Mabuti at may bumisitang kaibigan itong si Blair dito sa bahay. I assumed na wala siyang friends sa school dahil sa sobrang pagka mahiyain niya, yet she has a friend like you.” Mom stated and smiled warmingly at Maica as she welcomed her here in our house.

Inkyat ko siya kanina as study room para sabihing may bisita ako. And I was surprised that she looks more excited than me when she heard that it was my friend.

“Oo nga po. Mahiyain nga po itong si Blair when I approached her nung first day of school. Pero mukhang friendly naman po. That’s why we end up being friends.” Masayang pagkuwento ni Maica kay Mom.

“O siya, maiwan ko na muna kayo dito. If you both need anything I’m just there in our study room Blair, don’t hesitate to call me okay? O kaya naman ay kay Manang Soling.” Mom announced then looked at Maica,  “Enjoy your stay here hija.” nakangiting anito bago niya kami tuluyang iniwan sa salas.

Mom left us in the living room. Maica was standing in front of me while I’m sitting on the couch. She is roaming her eyes all over our house.

“Take a seat Maica, baka mangawit ka diyan kakatayo. I’ll just go to the dining to get you some orange juice. Do you want anything?”

“Grabe Blair, ang ganda naman pala ng bahay niyo. Mala mansion! Our house was huge too but your house is more larger than us!” she exclaimed in awe.

Bumaling siya sa akin ng tingin at saka nginitian na ani mong manghang mangha ito. My forehead creased. But she remains glaring at me with a glint of amusement.

Napailing nalang ako at bahagyang nangiti as kaniya.

“Anyway, I want some orange juice and a slice of Strawberry cake if you have some,” she said and smiled at me sweetly.

“Okay, coming. Just wait for me here or you want to come with me to our kitchen?” I probed.

“Sama nalang pala ako! Para naman makita ko rin kung gaano kagarbo ’yang kusina niyo.” Natatawa pang aniya.

I chuckled softly as well. We ate in our dining area but not at the dining table. Maica chose to eat at the kitchen island countertop, and I agree with that.

“Anong oras darating yung magtuturo sa iyo?” Maica asked me then she sipped on her glass of orange juice.

“Mamayang twelve pa. Dito na rin daw magla-lunch sabi ni Mommy.”

“So my time pa pala tayo! So what should we do then?” She then asked me excitedly.

“Hmm, I’m gonna practice my walk? You judge,” naiilang na sabi ko rito.

Dahil iyon lang naman ang alam kong pwede kong gawin at saktong nariyan naman siya ay may makakapagsabi sa akin kung maayos lang ba talaga ang lakad ko.

“Sigi, papanoorin kita. Titingnan ko kung magaling na ba.”

At ’yon nga ang nangyari pagkatapos naming mag-snack. I practiced my walked and she teaches me some poses when she noticed that I just only standing… doing nothing.

“Parted your legs and pointed it sharply, Blair. To make you look like you’re long-legged.” Maica said as she crossed her arms, sitting on our couch while I’m doing my runway.

“Ganito ba?”

Nagsalubong ang kilay nito. Mabilis kong iniba ang ayos ng aking mga hita dahil nakuha ko sa kaniyang ekspresyon na mali ang ginagawa ko.

“Ayan, ’yan tama. Just move your body freely. And when you do the poses just gave the audience a very alluring smile, Blair. I’m sure that you will kill it.” She muttered with a smirk on her lips and wink at me afterward.

Pagkatapos kong magpractice ay naupo muna ako sa tabi ni Maica na nakapwesto sa couch.

“You know what Blair naaasar na talaga ako sa Elena,” biglang aniya ng makaupo ako.

Napatingin naman ako sa kaniya habang tinatanggal ang strap ng heels na ginamit ko. Well, hindi ko siya masisisi dahil nakakainsulto nga naman kasi ang mga pinagsasasabi nito sa kaniya noong nakaraan.

Even me, I felt hatred towards her. Pero hindi ko nalang din siya binibigyang pansin. Because I believe that the more you pay attention to people like her, the more na ng nang aasar sila. Kaya I decided to just ignore her and didn’t pay attention to her harsh judgment.

“Akala mo kung sinong mayaman porket apo ng may ari ng eskuwelahan. Kala mo lahat matatakot sa kaniya at makukuha niya lahat.” she spatted, annoyed.

Pinapakinggan ko lang siya sa kaniyang mga hinaing tungkol kay Elena.

“Sorry nalang siya, si Kuya Ace nga hindi niya masungkit e’ nakuha pa niyang magmataas pa?” she said then grimaced later on with a boast of smirk drew on her lips.

Napamaang ako ng marinig ang pangalan ni Ace. I gasped and looked at her.

“Alam mo, ang gwapo talaga ni Kuya Ace no? Grabe, lalo na pag tititigan mo siya, mas lalo mong masasabi na ang perpekto niya.” She said like she was describing him with adoration.

Bahagya pang nakangisi ang labi nito habang nakatingin sa akin ng mataman.

I gasped when I know where it gonna comes next. She teasingly stared at me with the tugged-up corner of her lips.

I looked away.  “O-Oo nga,”  I uncertainly uttered. Kinakabahan sa mapanuya niyang pagtitig sa akin.

“Hahaha, ikaw ah. Akala mo hindi kita napapansin?” She probed.

“Napapansin saan?” nagtataka at mabikis ang tahip ng dibdib kong tanong sa kaniya.

“Napapansin saan? Saan nga ba?” she mimicked then rolled her eyes. Ani mong nag-iinarte sa akin.

I bit my lower lip when I know what’s running on her mind.

“Yung mga tingin mo at pamumula ng pisngi mo minsan kapag nakikita natin sila Kuya Ace. Do you really think I didn’t notice any of it?”

Saglit naman akong nagitla at namilog ang aking mga matang humarap ako sa kaniya. Nagtataka kunware akong tumingin sa mga mata niya.

I don’t know if what is she saying, but one thing is I can say now. That I do not feel comfortable when I know that Ace is around.

She eyed me curiously. Ani mong huhulihin ako sa akto pag may nagawa at kinilos akong kakaiba.

“Do you have a crush on him?” ngingisi ngising anito sa akin. She stared at me with her cat eyes now.

Natigilan naman ako sa sinabi niya. I gulped hard when I noticed her glares. It was like she needs to know what am I thinking. No, it seems like she already knew it and she just only wants to confirm it.

“Tell me, Blair. I thought we were friends? So why hiding secrets on me?” she asked me like she feels sullen.

Napalunok pa muna ako bago nangapa ng isasagot sa kaniya.

“W-Wala naman kasi akong tinatago Maica.” nakangiwing ani ko sa kaniya.

“Oh is that it? So why did you stutter? Bakit Ace lang tawag mo sa kaniya instead of kuya Ace?” Nagtataka na talagang anito.

I was struggling with words. I can’t seem to tell her why I feel this way towards Ace. Because even me, I can’t seem to recognize it. But when I heard someone came. It was my instructor who comes in with our maid. Mabilis na nabaling do’n ang aming atensyon.

They called mom and we eat our lunch before we started our last practice. I feel at ease that I haven’t answered Maica’s question on me. I feel like I’m being interrogated with pressure.

Thank god that he came. Hindi ko talaga alam kung ano ang sasabihin ko kay Maica kanina. Naguguluhan ako kaya buti nalang at dumating itong instructor ko para mawala ang topic namin.

Maica was silent the whole practice. She seems thinking about things while her glares are not leaving my way. I just hope she’s not thinking about our topic earlier.

Natapos rin ang practice ko hanggang sa umalis na rin ang trainer ko na hinatid pa ni Mommy sa labas. Maica looked exhausted for watching me the whole time.

“Uuwi na rin ako Blair. I’m feeling exhausted, see you tomorrow nalang. Thank you for the company.” She said then give me her hugs and said her goodbyes. She did the same to mom. “Thank you po, Tita. Sa uulitin po ulit.” She grinned a bit when she uttered that.

“Salamat din, hija. O siya, mauuna na akong pumasok sa inyo.” It was my Mom.

Nauna na ngang pumasok si Mom sa loob ng bahay habang ako ay nananatili rito sa labas para ihatid si Maica.

“Ipapahatid na kita sa driver namin–” she then suddenly cutted me off.

“Ah hindi na, I texted Sean to pick me up. Bka andito na yun sa labas,” she said while smiling widely at me.

Buti nalang at mukhang nakalimutan na rin nito ang tungkol sa pinag-uusapan namin kanina.

And when I saw a car parked outside our gate, I was surprised to see Sean came out of his car.

He looked handsome in his simple black loose shirt and jersey shorts.

“Hi Blair!” he said as he removes his wayfarer.

“Hello, Sean.” I wave my hand at him.

“Una na kami Blair, bye! Salamat ulit.” Maica said and walked towards the door of their car.

“Sayang naman at hindi ako nakasama sa inyong dalawa ngayong araw. You both seemed so happy.” Sean spoke nang makalapit siya sa akin.

“Ah, girl bonding kasi e’, pasensya na Sean.” nahihiyang ani ko sa kaniya.

“No, it’s okay. I’m just kidding you anyway, but I understand. Sigi una na kami. Bye Blair, take care.” Nakangiting paalam na ni Sean sa akin kalaunan.

Kumakaway pa si Maica sa loob ng sasakyan ng mag umpisa ng umandar ito.

I waved my hands to them.

Tumalikod na rin ako papasok ng gate nang mawala na sa paningin ko ang sasakyan nila. Ngunit nang matanaw ko ang paparating na sasakyan ni Daddy ay hinintay ko pa muna ito.

The guards started to open the gate towards the garage. I waited for Dad until he parked his car.

Lalapit na sana ako sa kaniya nang makababa siya ng sasakyan para salubungin nang makitang may dumating pang isang itim na sasakyan.

The black luxury car parked just at the back of my Dad’s car. And I was stunned to see Ace came out on his black Aston Martin car, wearing his wayfarer. He’s wearing a simple black polo-shirt and rugged pants. Hapit ng bahagya ang manggas ng damit nito sa braso niya na mabilis na nakuha ang aking atensyon.

He looks so handsome, more like a god even he’s just wearing a simple black polo shirt. I felt my body froze and gasped when I saw him. What is he doing here?

I was so shocked when his eyes sighted me from afar. He then walked and what stunned me more is when he’s leading towards my way, near the entrance of our house. I was expected that he came towards me when Dad suddenly called him.

Napasinghap pa ako nang tuluyan niyang maalis ang suot nitong wayfarer. At saglit pa muli akong natigilan nang magtama ang aming mga tingin.

And when I noticed that Dad started to walked with him towards my way, ay do’n na ako tuluyang nanigas sa aking kinatatayuan. Hindi ako nakagalaw hanggang sa namalayan ko nalang na nasa harapan ko na sila.

“Blair, this is Ace Holden Ventura, do remember him? He’s the son of Don Denver at Madame Helena.” nakangiting pakilala ni Daddy kay Ace sa akin.

Napakurap kurap pa muna ako ng ilang segundo bago binalingan si Ace ng sulyap.

“O-opo,” kinakabahang sagot ko. My words stuttered as I spoke in so much nervousness.

“Tell your mom that he’s here. I invited him for dinner.” Dad said, informing me as well.

I immediately nodded my head and awkwardly walked away papasok ng bahay.

He’s here for dinner. Hindi ko alam na close pala sila ni Daddy. It seems to me like they are business partners. Or they are not close, Ace is just here for his parent’s business? But why does it have to invite for dinner?

I called mom and tell that Ace Ventura is here and he will dine with us tonight. She hurriedly went downstairs when she heard what I just said.

While me, I entered my room and started fixing myself. Mukhang ang dumi dumi ko pa naman kanina ng makita niya ako dahil hindi pa ako nakakapagbihis after ng practice ko kanina. I’m sweating bullets kaya paniguradong amoy pawis na ako.

And he seems so fresh all the time. I shook my head. What am I thinking? Aughh! Bakit ba ako kinakabahan ng ganito dahil lang sa nandiyan siya. Why do I feel so conscious unlike when Sean’s came earlier, ni hindi ko nga napauna na hindi pa ako nakakapagpalit ng suot.

Pabagsak akong nahiga sa aking kama at tiningala ang ceiling para pakalmahin ang aking sarili. To calm the unknown strong beating of my heart. Easy, Blair…calm down yourself. We’re just gonna have dinner with him. With my family as well.

Kabanata 12

Kabanata 12

Pageant

I was walking towards our dining area when I heard my Dad’s hearty laugh. Napangiti ako dahil mukhang nagkakatuwaan na sila ro’n. Pumasok na ako ng dining room at naupo sa tabi ni Mom nang hindi binabalingan ang lahat.

And when I lifted my gazes on them ay nakita kong nakaupo si Dad sa kabisera habang si Ace naman ay nasa kaliwang upuan nito. My mom was on the right side as I am beside my Mom.

Ace looked serious. His manly features are highlighted in my view. He’s slightly siding in my view when I entered the kitchen but now that he’s just in front of me, I can’t take long to stare at him without getting a heart turbulent.

Nag-umpisa na kaming kumain at hindi ko magawang tumingin sa kanila. I felt uncomfortable by his intimidating presence. Ace is just in front of us eating silently. Magsasalita lang kapag may sasabihin si Daddy about their work.

“Buti at pinayagan ka ng ama mo na ikaw ang humawak ng mga ganitong klase ng architectural designs. I heard engineering daw ang gusto mong kuhanin. Ano at kinuha mo parin ang offer ng iyong ama?” Dad then asked in the middle of our meal to Ace who’s seriously eating his food.

He shifted his gaze to Dad. Pinagmasdan ko sila at mabilis din akong mag-iiwas ng tingin kalaunan.

“He said that I will learn a lot about it and basic architecture lang naman po yung aaralin. I’ll focus on my engineering degree when I’m in college.” his low baritone voice said.

Dad looked at him with an amazing glint on his eyes. Napalabi pa ito bago nagsalita.

“Architecture and engineering, both are integral to the design and construction of structures. So it’s not bad actually to take that piece of advice from your Dad.” My father said proudly.

“Yeah, it will benefit me.” Ace responded then turned his glare on me.

I moved on to my chair. Bumaba ang tingin ko sa aking pinggan nang mabilis akong makaramdam ng matinding kaba dahil sa biglaan niyang pagsulyap sa akin.

Nagpatuloy sila sa pag uusap ni Dad at hindi ko nalang pinakinggan. Hindi ako kumportable sa kadahilanang alam kong nandyan siya.

I felt his stare at me. So I just act normally like I’m not feeling disturbed by his presence and glares.

“Ito ngang si Blair gustong sumunod sa yapak ko. She also wants to be an architect someday.” Dad uttered proudly. He looked at me and gave me a genuine smile.

I slightly smiled at my Dad. I began to feel my heartbeat throbs when I know he’s telling Ace what I wanted to be in the future. Napatingin tuloy ako kay Ace. His forehead creased. I frowned at that. Then I looked away immediately to get away from his serious glares.

“I believe she’s gonna be the best architect someday. A legendary father-slash architect like you Mr. Cortez, I know your daughter will be as good as you are.” Ace exclaimed that made me left in a hang.

I then lifted my gaze on him, surprised. My lips parted when I heard him say it. My heart skipped a beat for a while. He noticed me looking at him so I dripped my gaze on my glass of water in front of me and immediately get it to drink.

“Yeah, I believe in it. Or maybe she can be more good than me.” Dad asserted then let a chuckle afterward. He glances in my way.

“She’s still young that’s why I don’t want to pressure her. I want her to enjoy her life for the meantime and when the time comes at gusto na niyang matuto, I’ll help her on that part,” he said then smiled at me sweetly.

Natapos ang dinner na parang lumulutang ako. I didn’t even notice kung nabusog ba ako o hindi. Hinatid pa nila Dad and Mom si Ace sa sasakyan nito sa labas ng bahay.

I took a peek at them when Ace is in front of his car. I was in the doorway standing there as I looked at them.

“Salamat sa pagpapaunlak mo hijo para dito kumain ng gabihan. We really appreciate it. Don’t forget to send my regards to Don Denver.” Dad told as he slightly tapped Ace’s shoulder.

“Salamat din po. I enjoyed your company and the foods are all taste so good. Don’t worry, I will tell my Dad po, Tito.” he politely pronounced to my parents.

And when his dim eyes met mine from where I’m standing. I didn’t look away instead, I stare at him straight in the eyes sa unang pagkakataon. I felt my chest bursting inside in so much scruple. But at the same time, I felt relieved when I saw his beautiful cloudy smoke eyes bore into mine.

I saw how his jaw clenched as he looked away. He entered his car and the engine start roaring.

Tumalikod na rin si Mom at Dad at naglakad na pabalik sa loob ng bahay nang umandar na ang sasakyan ni Ace.

Mabilis naman akong naglakad papasok sa loob ng bahay. Umakyat na ako ng hagdan at tinungo ang aking silid. I sat on my bed and put my right hand on my chest. I felt my heart is beating loudly. It’s getting wilder and wilder as I remember how his glare on me.

I was amazed by his simple moves. Napakagaan at pino ng bawat galaw nito kanina habang kumakain kami. I smiled widely when I remember what he just said about me being a good architect someday. Wait. Not just good, he said I will become the best!

Payapa akong nakatulog ng gabing iyon. Dala na rin ng pagod sa maghapon. I rested enough and woke up early the next morning.

“Hey, Blair! Prepared ka na ba para sa contest? This Wednesday na ’yon ah.” Ani Maica sa akin kinaumagahan.

Kadarating ko lang ng classroom. I sat on my chair when Maica asked me.

“Yup,” tipid kong sagot sa kaniya.

Maica just smile and nodded at me. Luminga linga pa ako sa paligid nang makita ko ang kadarating lang na si Angela.

Maica leaned on me a bit. I looked at her. Nagtataka sa biglaang pagdikit nito sa akin.

“Why?” I asked Maica curiously.

“Usap-usapan ngayon ’yang si Angela sa buong campus. Ang dinig kong sabi nila ay nakita raw nilang kausap niya si Kuya Ace. It seems like they are closed to each other.” she whispered as we both looked at Angela who’s now taking her seat beside me.

My forehead creased. Palagi nalang may nasasagap itong si Maica na sabisabi. Ang lakas din ng radar ng isang ito e’. And why is it big deal talking to Ace? What if Angela just approached him one time at naaktuhan lang nilang nag-uusap. Close na ba agad na matatawag iyon?

“Kanino mo nalaman?” I then asked her normally. Na para bang hindi ako ganoon kainterisado sa mga binabalita niya ngayon.

“Well,  believe me or not I heard it from Elena’s friends. I was walking in the hallway kanina and they are talking about the girl na tinulungan daw ni Kuya Ace sa cafeteria before. And I guess that was Angela, the only girl he helped so I assumed that it is her.” she said as she pulled herself back to her seat.

I sighed and looked in Angela’s way.

This past few months, being her classmates I noticed that she’s always quiet. We even try to reach her out but her too much snob. O baka hindi lang talaga siya sanay ng may nakikipag kaibigan sa kaniya. Well, I felt it before but I never declined someone who offered to be my friend.

We invite her for lunch and she ignores it. I don’t know why she does it. But I think she’s not comfortable being with us or in anyone. Kaya hinayaan nalang namin siya kalaunan.

Tuesday came and I prepared everything that I needed for the pageant. Mom helped me with everything kaya hindi naman na ako nahirapan. At kasama rin naman ang mga parents ng ibang candidates na dadalo para sa pagtitipon bukas.

Mom volunteered to assist me for tomorrow. She already prepared everything. Dress, Makeup artist and she even hired a photographer only for me. She said that it was my first time so it should be memorable and special.

Maica and Sean are also there to support me, and even how much they wanted to go in backstage to help me where the candidates are, they can’t. Because they are not allowed. Dahil bilang lang ang makakapasok sa likuran.

Malaki naman ng backstage but they are only allowed people around two to three persons each contestant. So the room will have more enough space to set up everything.

Mom is beside me taking some pictures of mine. Tapos na akong ayusan and I wear a heavy make up. I’m not feeling comfortable at first but then I like it now when I saw the final touches.

“You’re so beautiful, Blair!” My mom exclaimed when the makeup artist finished my look.

My light brown wavy hair is now on a high ponytail. It makes me looked more mature than my real age. I find my hairstyle a bit sophisticated but I can bear it with elegance later when I’m on stage.

“Ladies and gentlemen, candidates! Mag uumpisa na tayo within 5 minutes. So better you line up na.” the woman informed us and went on stage.

Kinakabahan naman akong bumaling kay mommy. Pakiramdam ko ay may namumuong luha sa mga mata ko sa sobrang kaba. But Mom smiled at me. Seems like she knows and understands what I’m feeling right now.

“You can do it, Blair. Just believe in yourself and do your best. Mommy is just here to support you. Come on, stand up.” Mom held my elbow and hand as she helped me to stand up from the stool I am sitting in.

I feel solace by her words. It’s really motivated me to be not afraid. To be confident to face other people.

“Good luck, kaya mo ’yan. I know you can do it. Just don’t be shy, okay? Just enjoy it and don’t pressure yourself to win this.” My Mom advice on me before she gave me a calming embrace. I accept her arms wholeheartedly.

I let a heavy sigh then smile afterward. You can do it Blair, kaya mo ’yan. Huwag ka lang kakabahan mamaya habang naglalakad. Para hindi ka matapilok at mapahiya. I reprimanded myself.

My mind was talking to myself as I fall in line dahil ilang minuto nalang ay mag-umpisa na.

“Oh kasali ka pa pala? I thought you back out?” nang-aasar na sabi ni Elena sa harapan ko sa pila palabas ng stage. Hindi ko siya binigyang pinansin at nag-focus nalang ako sa mga gagawin ko para mamaya.

“Huwag ka ng umasang mananalo ka. Kaya kung ako sa’yo huwag ka nalang lumabas para hindi ka umuwing luhaan. You can still back out, Blair.” she mockingly said to me.

’Yan nanaman siya sa mga linyahan niya. Hindi ba siya nagsasawa sa kakasabi niyan sa akin?

Tiningnan ko lang siya sa mga mata bago ako bumaling sa aking likuran. For sure Mom is now outside. Naghihintay na ito doon dahil malapit ng mag-umpisa ang pageant.

“O, anong tinitingin tingin mo sa likod? If I were you I will start packing my things now and leave. Tss, diyan ka na nga. Loser!” she daggered and leered before she left me.

I gasped. Akala mo naman kung sinong makapag salita. Hindi pa nga nagsisimula hindi na agad ako mananalo? She’s not one of the judges so she’s not the one who will decide if I will stay or not. If I win or not.

I’ll promise myself to do my very best. To just enjoy what will I’m gonna do. Oo nga at marami kaming kandidata pero hindi naman ibig sabihin no’n ay wala na akong pag-asang manalo.

And it’s okay with me too if I don’t win. The important is that I enjoyed it. It’s more than enough than the title.

“Let us all welcome our Mr. And Ms. Intramurals candidates! Give them a big round of applause.” the emcee announced.

The contest started as the candidates walking out from backstage. The music was so loud as the dim view of the audience showed on me. There was also a spotlight that moving on us directly on stage.

We are now wearing our casual wear.

The boys are wearing their simple plain printed white shirt from our school covered by different styles of a denim jacket. It’s either autumn and ripped denim jackets that are complimented on their simple shirt and maong pants.

Meanwhile, the girls are wearing different kinds of tops as long as it color is white, it is also printed by the intramurals but some candidates made it into something artsy and not just a simple shirt. And it’s being paired with skinny jeans.

Me, I am wearing a one-shoulder ruffled crop top and black high-waisted skinny jeans.

The crowd inside the school gymnasium became wild. I saw some banners for my co-candidates when it’s Elena’s turn. Natatanaw ko mula rito sa loob ang mga tao dahil ako na ang susunod na lalabas.

“Go Elena!!! Go! Go! Elena!”

“Win the crown, girl! You can do it!” her friends chanted from the crowd below the stage.

I even saw a big picture of Elena who’s in the tarpaulin on the bleachers. It’s like a backdrop but it’s still looking good.

The junior high was shouting for their bets. The seniors are on the back but still shouted for their representatives as their support.

And when it’s my turn to come out, my heart began to beat wildly in so much nervousness.

I looked around and I saw my Mom below near on the stage smiling widely at me. She giggled and raise her hand.

“Go Blair! Just enjoy it! Ok?!” Mom cheered. I didn’t hear what she said but I understand it when she mouthed.

I smiled genuinely at my mom who supported me. And my smile grew wider when I saw Maica with Sean behind my Mom’s back. They also prepared a tarpaulin which my photo is attached there that was taken from my social media account for sure.

“Go Blair! Ang ganda ganda mo!” Maica shouted together with my other classmates who supported me.

Nagulat pa ako nang ilabas nila ang gold letter foil balloons at pinagtabi tabi iyon para mabuo ang pangalan ko. Walang paglagyan ang aking ngiti sa labi ko habang pinagmamasdan ang mga taong sumusuporta sa akin.

I walked freely and confidently on stage. I didn’t mind the nervousness I am feeling that started to subside when I saw people who supported me. I feel overwhelmed about it that gives me the confidence to walk on stage glamorously.

Some of the student varsity whistled. I even heard their loud bark of laughter.

I looked at them and saw how different the stares they are given to us. I find it malicious but some of them look at me with awe.

I even heard how they asked their co-varsity player if whats the name of the girl candidate.

I was a bit shocked when one of them pointed at me and winked his eyes. I looked away when I find it a bit weird.

Nagpatuloy ang hiyawan ng mga tao. Napabaling ako ng tingin sa lalaking nakatayo kasama ng ibang mga varsity players.

I gasped when I noticed his serious glare on me. His jaw clenched. I can see it even he’s too far from me. It’s like he’s pissed by something. He’s so serious and his smoky eyes were a bit dark than its usual.

Nabalik lang ako sa wisyo nang mag-uumpisa na kaming maglakad isa isa. Natapos na namin ang maikli lang namang introduction number. So we proceeded for the ramp.

But then, Ace’s menacing glares on me on the crowd giving me a different vibe. He seems pissed or what that I don’t get if why.

Kabanata 13

Kabanata 13

Confidence

I walked gracefully when it’s my turn again. It’s now me and Mikko’s turn as a pair. We walked sideways. Mikko has an air of being a playboy so the crowd cheered for him, and for me I guess.

“Ang guwapo mo Mikko! Woohhh!!”

“Go Blair! You looked so pretty! Para kang living barbie doll!”

Some of the crowd praised below loudly. I gave them a very confident smile. My chin is up, chest out and my toes were on their point.

I do different poses and changing my smile into a fierce one. I parted my lips to be looked fiercer.

I even tried to winked at some of my classmates and the crowds became wilder. I was a bit surprised by that. Simple gestures of mine, I didn’t think that it will have an effect on them.

It boosted my confidence.

And when Mikko is on the halfway through the stage and we need to meet in the middle. I walked slowly and surely with a wide smile plaster on my lips.

His arms snaked on my waist when we meet in the center stage. I didn’t expect his sudden move. But then I guess it was one of the best poses we should gonna do. So I’ll go with him. I put my arm on his shoulder. We did that pose for a second.

And when we are started going to walk in front of the stage I started to feel not comfortable with his hands.

I thought we’ll gonna do it for a while but I was wrong. Until we reach the boundary of the stage in front while his hands still on my waist. He didn’t remove it.

I tried to avoid it in my mind when the flash of the camera strikes us. It’s becoming more flashy because our school has their own cameraman to take us a shot but mom got her own photographer for me. Sabay pa sila sa pagkuha ng larawan kaya mas lalo akong nagseryoso sa ginagawa. They were also a lot of cameras scattered below.

I smiled at the camera when it flashed for the third time. I already removed my hand on Mikko’s shoulder and put it on my waist as I pose on the camera.

Nakahinga rin ako ng maluwag nang matapos namin iyon at maghiwalay na sa backstage ni Mikko. The men’s rooms were different on us.

We’re now on the back stage changing our clothes from casual wear into sportswear.

“You did a great job, Blair! While I’m watching you kanina I was amazed. Your instructor was so good kaya hindi ako nagkamali sa pagpili sa kanya.” Mom said as she dried my sweat on my forehead.

I smiled at her.  “Thanks, Mom,” mahinang ani ko.

People here inside were busy changing their clothes. And minutes after, I am wearing now my sportswear attire.

It’s golf attire. A woman golf outfit. It’s a stripped slimming golf skirt short-sleeved t-shirt. It’s like a summer skirt suit and a pink visor on my head while my hair was still on its high ponytail.

We line up when it’s our time to comes out. There’s a production number that our school dancers performed. And when we need to change again there is someone who will entertain the students para hindi mainip.

The crowd was still on their loud cheers. People remain shouting as we started coming out from backstage.

Mikko is also wearing his golf attire. We talked about it before this day so our outfit would be matched.

Marahan kaming naglakad patungo sa pinakaharap ng stage. We do some poses again and the crowd became wild once again. I was smiling the whole time. Nagtabi kami ni Mikko and we did our last pose together.

My smile on my lips slightly quivered when my eyes caught Ace’s way still with the varsity team. I composed my smile even I fake it, I still try to make it look like a real one.

I felt my heart pounding so loud because of his dark glares on me. Kahit na malayo siya sa akin ay ramdam ko pa rin and riin don.

Alam kong hindi ito dahil sa kabang nararamdaman ko sa maraming tao king hindi dahil ito sa tingin niya sa akin. I’m still not used to him glaring at me that way not even watching me here on stage doing my runway. He’s just seriously looking at me and I get immediately nervous.

I lifted my eyes on my friend Maica with Sean. Maica was cheering for me while Sean is standing straight, looking at me intently.

I smiled at him. He then smiled at me when he notices my smile for him.

Naglakad na kami patalikod ni Mikko and we parted our ways when we’re in the middle.

Pinakalma ko muna ang puso kong naghuhuramentado bago lumapit kay Mom sa backstage. Nakabalik na siya agad galing sa labas dahil every time I go out to ramp on stage she also immediately came out to watch me.

Mom handed me a bottle of water. I took it and drank it abruptly. I sat on my chair that is designated for me. Nagpahinga ako ng bahagya para makapagbihis na rin ako ng formal attire pagkatapos.

I was about to stand up to change my dress when I heard the crowds noise.

Napakalakas ng sigawan nila. Ibang iba sa sigaw na ibinigay nila sa amin at sa iba pang kandidata.

Kaya naman ay napabaling ako ng tingin sa iba pang kadarating lang. Kahit sila ay nagtataka rin kung ano ba iyon. Iilan pa lang kaming kandidata ang nandito sa back stage dahil ang iba ay rumarampa pa.

“Oh my gosh! What the hell!” the girl shouted.

Everyone in the room looked at her. Kahit ako ay napabaling sa kaniya. Nakasilip kasi siya sa stage kaya hindi namin alam kung ano ba ang nangyayari. Lumapit sa kaniya ang iba pang mga kandidata para makiusyoso.

“OMG! Pwede ba ’yang ganyan?” tanong ng isang kandidata rito.

“Grabe naman si Elena! She’s really that desperate para manalo sa contest na ito?” the girl said like she was disgusted.

“Baka too desperate mapansin lang ni Ace! She knows that Ace has a girlfriend but she’s still pushing herself to him.” Another girl exclaimed then rolled her eyes.

My forehead creased. Bakit kaya nila pinag-uusapan si Elena? And Ace? What about him? Nauna na kasi ako kay Elena sa mga sumunod na ramp because of her grade level, unlike nung production ramp number namin.

I shook my head then stood up from my sit. I need to focus on myself para naman sulit lahat ng pagod at efforts ni Mommy, at nila Maica for me.

Mom helped me to change into my long gown. It was a strapless silk satin gown that featured asymmetrical draping, pleating at the bustier, and gorgeous triple folds, volants that formed an overskirt at the dress skirt portion.

It hugs in my body perfectly. My body curves are slightly highlighted because it’s fitted. Nakaayos na rin ang aking buhok and very different from my high ponytail. It has now larger curls are made on its very end and smaller on the bottom part of my long hair that made into a bun. It was not in a clean bun but the curls from my some escaping little hairs made it more functional gorgeously.

It looks so elegant and classy on me.

“You really are beautiful, sweetie!” My Mom complimented me.

She took a lot of pictures of mine before we go out for the last ramp. And also she took a picture of us two.

Lumabas na sila Mommy kasama ang bading na makeup artist ko at ang isang lalaking nag-aassist ng susuotin ko. Nasa pila na ako ngayon at naghahanda na sa paglabas nang makita ko na naman si Elena.

She stops and narrowed her eyes on me. Tinignan niya ako na para bang nagulat siya sa itsura ko pero agad din namang nawala at napalitan ng inis.

“Hmm, don’t expect na makakapasok kapa ng top three. Dahil for sure etsepwera ka sa slot na ’yon. So better start readied yourself for the loss.” She said then rolled her eyes at me.

She looked beautiful in her gold shimmering long gown. Pero sa ugali niya… I cannot say.

Umalis na siya at bumalik na sa kaniyang pila sa bandang likuran ko. I am candidate number two kaya nasa unahan talaga ako.

I walked out of backstage and slowly walking on the stage when it’s finally my walk. Sumabay ang aking mga paa sa paghakbang kasabay ng mabagal na indayog ng tugtog. Dahan dahan akong naglakad papunta sa pinakagitna.

Mikko wasn’t with me. Solo runway na ito dahil formal wear na. Dito pipiliin ang magiging top three for the Miss Intramurals. Na kung saan ay sasabak sa isang question and answer.

I walked gracefully as much as I can. I give my very best dahil ito na ang finals.

“Wow! You’re so sexy, Blair!”

“Go gorgeous Blair! Go gorgeous Blair! Go gorgeous Blair!!!” My classmates cheered for me.

The crowd was a bit loud when it’s my last pose in the middle. I gave them a very warmheartedly smile as I did my remarked, slowly turned around, and face them slowly with my left leg on its partial pointed stance.

I even glanced at each jury before I turned my gaze back on the audience.

Napabaling ang tingin ko sa banda ng mga varsity para tingnan kung nandoon pa ba si Ace at pinapanood ako. Pero bahagya akong nadismaya nang makitang wala na siya roon.

I was on the side now positioning, waiting for the other candidates. Tapos na kaming mag ramp ng aming formal wear. We’re now waiting for the result for who will gonna be in the top three.

“Okay! The results are finally here with me. So partner, unahan mo na kung sino ba ang unang makakapasok sa ating top three!” the emcee said at his partner in hosting.

“We started at fifteen candidates and now we are down to three. Here. We. Go.” nakakakabang anito.

“The first candidate that made it into the top three is contestant number…”

Kinakabahan man ay nakangiti pa rin akong nakatayo sa harap ng maraming tao. Tumunog ang drumroll.

The candidate besides me was a bit tensed. I felt it and I don’t want to feel the same way.

I should think positive instead of being negative.

“Candidate number thirteen!”

“Woohhh!! Go Lisa! I know you can win this!”

Naghiyawan ang mga estudyante. Especially the senior students cheered for her. She stepped forward.

Lisa was candidate number thirteen. She’s in her grade eleven now. Bakas ang gulat sa kaniya dahil nakapasok siya ng top three. But the smile on her lips indicates that she’s happy that she made it as the first slot.

“And now, she will be joined by candidate number… Four!”

I saw Elena stepped forward and started walking confidently kung nasaan si Lisa nakapwesto. She waved her hand na ani mong siya na ang nanalo. She’s not even shocked when the emcee announced her name. The crowd was also cheering for her. So she really made it into the top three.

Habang ako naman ay kinakabahan na ngayon dahil kahit papaano ay gusto ko ring mapabilang sa top three. Pero kung hindi man ako makapasok ay tatanggapin ko dahil unang beses ko pa lang naman itong sumali. 

And I admit that I enjoyed it as well.

“This is it, partner! Our final candidate in the top three that will join our two beautiful ladies in front is candidate number…”

Pakiramdam ko ay pulos drumroll nalang ang naririnig ko. Malakas din ang hiyawan ng mga estudyante para sa mga pambato nila.

“Go Blair! Alam naming ikaw ang makakapasok!” I heard one of the crowd shouted.

Napangiti ako niyon pero hindi pa rin niyon naalis ang kabang nararamdaman ko.

“Amanda, ikaw na ’yan! And ganda mo!”

“For sure it’s Andrea! Go girl! Kahit pang top 2 ka lang overall okay lang, beauty ka naman e!”

Dinig kong hiyawan pa ng iba. But when the emcee spoke everyone became wilder.

“Number two! Si Blair na ’yan panigurado! Go best friend!!!” Si Maica na nakita kong naghihisterya na sa baba ng stage.

I looked at her then smiled a bit. Afterward, I pursed my lips. Napapikit lalo ako sa kaba ng huminto na ang drumroll, senyales na magsasalita na ang emcee.

“Candidate number two!” sabay pang ani ng dalawang emcee na nagpabingi sa aking tainga dahil sa malakas na hiyawan ng mga manonood.

Napakurap kurap naman ako nang lumakas at halos hindi magkamayaw ang hiyawan ng mga estudyante.

I looked at my number and I was shocked that it was me. I’m candidate number two!

My mouth dropped dramatically as I slowly stepped forward. Still shocked that I made it into the top three.

The students shouted. Supports every candidate who has entered the top three including me.

I was happy for being one of the three. Kumalma lang ako nang magsalitang muli ang isa sa mga emcee.

“Ladies and gentlemen, your top three finalists!”  

Mas lalo pang lumakas ang hiyawan ng mga estudyante. Kahit ang mga varsity players ay nakita kong nag babatukan sa sobrang saya. I don’t know why. Baka dahil nakapasok si Lisa sa top three. But I heard some of them are cheering for me.

Nagpatuloy naman ang host sa pag announced ng top three para sa mga lalaking kandidato.

Nakapasok rin si Mikko kaya nakangiti ko siyang binalingan. He looked at me with a smug look on his face.

Nakapasok din ang partner ni Lisa na si Jayden na kaibigan ni Ace. The girls in the crowd are hysterically shouting dahil nakapasok ito.

At ang isa naman ay mula sa grade ten at marami ring tagasuporta.

“The final round of the competition starts right now. Dito na natin malalaman kung sino ba ang karapat dapat na itanghal bilang Mr. And Ms. Intramurals!” the host informed lively.

“And it’s called the final word! Here is how it works!” sabi ng host sabay lingon sa katabi nito na magpapaliwanag ng gagawin.

“You will be asked the same questions kaya habang ang isa ay sumasagot, the other candidates will be wearing their own soundproof headphones. So now candidate number four and two, headphones on.”

May lumapit naman sa aming dalawang babae at tinulungan kaming isinuot ang malaking headphones sa aming tainga.

Wala akong marinig ng suot ko na ito. Malakas ang tunog ng music kaya masisigurado talaga nilang wala kang maririnig n kahit ano.

Natapos ng sumagot si Lisa at mukhang maganda ang naisagot nito sa tanong.

It’s obvious on how the audience reacts to her answer. So maybe she answered it beautifully.

And when Elena’s turned, the audience was also cheering for her.

Naglakad na itong pabalik sa tabi ko ng matapos na siya ilang sandali pa. Someone took out my headphones at bahagya pa akong nagulat roon.

“It’s time for your final word candidate number two, please join me here in front,” the emcee said then give me a reassuring smile.

I walked towards his way as the crowd cheered for me.

“How are you feeling, candidate number 2?” He asked that made me feel nervous.

I held the mic as I glance at the emcee beside me.

“G-Great, I’m happy that I made it into the final round.”

And then the crowd cheered again. I smiled at that, nervously.

At nang ilibot kong muli ang aking paningin sa paligid para sana hanapin si Ace kung nandito na ba siya ay hindi siya namataan ng aking paningin.

“Okay, now here is the question for you candidate number two.”

And that made me back in my state when the emcee spoke. I focused and managed to calm myself so I can answer the question beautifully. I gasped.

“For you, what is the purpose of intramurals, and how does it helped you as an individual?” the host asked me.

I exhaled softly. Then I take a breath first before I took the microphone to answer the question.

“Kaya mo ’yan Blair! Wohhh!!!”

“Go Blair! We know you’re the best! We know you can answer it!”

I cleared my throat and held the microphone tightly.

“For me, it is an opportunity for students to compete in any variety of sports. It is open to all students. The purpose of the intramurals is to provide a fun and structured play experience that promote the physical, mental and social development of every child. And it helps me as an individual to build my confidence that was lacked before by joining this kind of contest. It helps me to gain myself again. Facing my fear like facing the crowd helps us to boost our confidence. To be us again, to be not scared of something. To show them what we are and what we can be. This pageant reminds me that anyone has their own talents and capabilities. So you should not be ashamed because no one is incompetent. That would be all, thank you.” I said with confidence.

Nakahinga ako ng maluwag nang matapos ko iyong masagot.

I just answer the question base on what I know and what I’ve experienced. I hope it reached the people who struggled with their self low-esteem personality.

People shouted after I answered the question. I feel like I answered that well because they shouted at me in support. Chanting my name with admiration.

Kabanata 14

Kabanata 14

Picked up

Natapos naring tanungin ang mga lalaking kandidato. They are now computing the total scores for the final results.

There have only three categories. The first is casual wear, second is the sportswear and lastly was formal wear or the long gown.

They are now preparing the sash and the other trophies as well as the crown and certificates na ibibigay nila sa mananalo.

Inanunsyo muna nila ang nanalo sa sportswear and it was Elena. She confidently waves her hand at the crowd.

Next is casual wear and I was shocked that it was me who got the award. The crowd cheered for me again.

Habang inaanunsyo naman kung sino ang nanalo sa mga lalaki sa casual wear ay naghahanda na uli kami para sa isa pang award.

“And for the formal attire or long gown. We have candidate number… Two!” the host announced.

I smile widely when I heard my number again. I feel lucky for this. It’s great that I won for the second time, I didn’t even expect it so I was so happy to know that I did a great job.

Isinuot sa akin ng isa sa mga jury na lalaki ang sash. And they gave me the certificate also. We took some photos and I go back to where I was again.

At ngayon naman ay ia-anounce na nila kung sino ba ang tatanghalin bilang Mr. And Ms. Intramurals. The crowd was wild and on their peaks because of the excitement, they’ve been feeling.

“Who do you think will gonna win the crown being Ms. And Mr. Intramurals this school year?” the host exclaimed at the audience.

The scream of the crowd was a bit bearable but as time pass by, the noise was being more harsh in my ears. Sabayan pa ng malakas na pagkabog ng dibdib ko.

They firstly announced the second runner up and that was Elena for Ms. And Mikko for the Mr.

And now, I and Lisa were both facing ourselves. Holding each other’s hand as the host announced the grand winner.

“Whoever the first number we will mention will be presented as Ms. Intramurals. So here we go ladies!” the host shrieked a bit.

Tumunog ang umaatikabong drumroll na sumasabay sa malakas na kabog ng dibdib ko.

I closed my eyes when I heard Lisa chanting words. I open my eyes and looked at her.

“Me. Me. Me. Me. Please I should win this.” Lisa chanted as her eyes were shut.

I gasped. She was so competitive like Elena. They both want to win this kaya hindi na ako magtataka na ibinigay nilang pareho ang lahat ng makakaya nila.

We all did our best pero isa lang ang dapat na mag stand out.

She holds my hand, slightly squeezing it.

“Our Miss Intramurals for this school year is contestant number…” pagbibitin ng host.

Hindi pa rin tumitigil ang lahat sa pag sigaw kung sino ba sa amin ni Lisa ang mananalo. Napapikit ako dahil sa kabang nararamdaman ko.

“Contestant number two!” the host announced.

Mariin kong idinilat ang aking mga mata dahil sa gulat at pagkamangha dahil sa hindi makapaniwalang ako ang nanalo.

“Candidate number two please join us here.” masuyong ani ng host sa akin.

The crowd is at their peaks of victory when the host announced that I’m the winner.

“Woohh! Best friend ko yan!!!”

“Hanep ang ganda mo Blair! Well, deserve mo ’yan!! “

“Ang galing galing mo! Congrats!”

I smiled when I heard their cheers for me. It was heart melted and I really appreciate it.

Dahan dahan naman akong naglakad patungo sa pinaka harap ng stage. They put the sash on me and give me another certificate. It was bigger than the casual and formal wear certificate I have received earlier.

They also gave me a bouquet and handed me a trophy with ’Miss intramurals engraved in it. Then put the crown at the top of my head.

Hindi ko magkadaugaga sa kakawahak sa mga nakuha ko habang nakikipag kamay sa mga hurado.

“Congratulations!” the woman said then hugged me a bit.  

“Thank you po!” Masayang ani ko.

The handsome model came into my way also, his one of the jury. “Congrats!” he said then we shook our hands.

“Thank you po!” I politely said.

Then our school principal approached me as well and greeted me with congratulations.

We’re now still on the stage. Tapos narin ang program for today. Tanghali ng hapon na rin nang mag-umpisa ang pageant kanina kaya inabot na kami ng gabi.

Some of my classmates and schoolmates took a picture with me.

Masyado silang madami kaya hindi pa kami tapos hanggang ngayon. Nakita ko si Elena na umalis na rin naman agad pagkaraan. She frantically looked at me. Like she was mad because I was the reigning Ms. Intramurals.

I shook my head and ignore her. Ayaw ko ng gulo kaya mas mabuti ng iwasan ko nalang siya.

“Grabe Blair! I really adore your long gown. Who is your designer so I can contact her if I need gowns to wear at some formal parties! I really love the style and the design!” The woman said then giggled after we took a photo together on her phone.

I smiled at her. “My mom was the one who contacted the designer kaya hindi ko kilala. But I heard from Mom na International designer yung gumawa non. I’m gonna ask my Mom if you want.” I then happily said to her.

“Ate Blair pa-picture naman po! Idol ko na kayo simula ngayon! Cuz you are so pretty!” the girl said then slightly hugged me.

We took some photos when the varsity team was the next one who approached me.

Nagbulong bulungan naman ang ibang babaeng estudyante ang iba naman ay parang kinikilig pa dahil lumapit ang mga sikat na kalalakihan sa amin.

“Hi! I’m Johnson!” pakilala ng isang sa kanila. Nakangiti ito at nakaporma ang ayos.

“Hey! Ako nga pala si Clark.”  nangingiting anito sabay kindat sa akin.

He looked familiar. Napaisip ako saglit. Naningkit ang mga mata ko. Ah! He’s the one who winked at me while I was still on the ramp!

“Hello! Nice meeting you.” inabot ko ang kamay nilang dalawa na nakaabang sa akin.

“Nice to meeting you too, Blair.” sabay pang ani ni Clark at Johnson sa akin.

Sunod sunod naring nagpakilala ang iba pa nilang kasamahan. Naiilang man ako ay tinanggap ko pa rin ang pakikipag kamay nila sa akin.

“Ang ganda mo pala talaga sa malapitan. Grabe! You look so hot in your long gown!” the other guy said. I forgot his name dahil sa dami ba naman nilang nagpakilala sa akin ay hindi ko na magawang tandaan pa ang pangalan nila isa-isa.

I felt my cheeks flushed. I shyly looked at him and smile.

“Casual wear pa nga lang ikaw na agad ang napansin namin!” ani naman ng isa pa nilang kasamahan.

I gave them another smile. Napakurap kurap ako ng maalala kong kasama nga pala nila si Ace kanina bakit parang hindi ko na siya makita ngayon?

“Well, I was really amazed by your answer. You’re not just pretty huh, you are also smart. I like that.” Johnson uttered.

Nginitian ko naman siya. Mukha naman siyang seryoso hindi gaya ng iba nilang kasama na mukhang mga playboy. He’s cute and has a manly feature like Ace.

Kumuha sila ng larawan kasama ako. Merong solo shot at meron ding group shot.

The boys were fun, they really entertained me. Hindi lang talaga mawala sa isipan ko si Ace. Bakit nawala agad siya kanina? Napanood niya kaya ako ng manalo ako?

I hope he’s here even my heart was pounding so loud when he’s around. I would rather like it than not seeing him here in the crowd.

Bahagya akong napayuko. At nagulat nang lumapit si Maica sa akin.

“Oh my gosh, Blair! I told you, you can win this! I’m so proud of you my friend! Hinakot mo lahat ng award! My goodness!” she hysterically said before she gave me a warm embrace.

“Napakagaling mo kanina! I didn’t expect you to walk and make some poses like that! You looked veteran when you did that!” she giggled as she said that.

“Thank you, Maica. I really appreciated your efforts for me!” Madamdaming sabi ko sa kaniya.

“You’re always welcome Blair,”

Then I turned my gaze on Sean who seems waiting for me to glimpse on his way.

“Congrats Blair!” he said then hug me.

I was shocked by his sudden move. Buti nalang at saglit lamang iyon at hindi naman gaanong mahigpit.

He smiled at me. There’s something glisten in his eyes when he stares at me for a while. He then looked at me passionately.

I just smiled at him and said. “Thanks Sean!” 

“Nako! If you only knew, he was drooling over you the whole time when you’re on stage!” pangbibisto nito sa ginagawa ni Sean. Maica chuckled.

Bahagya naman akong nagulat ng malaman iyon.

“Well, he has a long-time crush on you. Hindi ba at nasabi ko naman na sayo ’yon?” Tanong pa ni Maica.

I looked at Sean. Bahagya naman siyang yumuko pero ang mga mata ay nakatutok pa rin sa akin.

“Yeah, I have a crush on you,” he confessed. I saw how his adam’s apple move.

He seriously admits to me. My eyes widened a bit. He just confessed that he has a crush on me! I bit my lower lip. Well, paghanga lang naman ang ibig sabihin niyon sa pagkakaalam ko.

“Oh! Tama na nga ’yan baka langgamin ako dito eh!” Ani pa Maica kalaunan.

Bahagya naman akong natawa sa sinabi ni Maica at saka nag-iwas ng tingin kay Sean.

“Blair are you done here? Let’s go home. Invite your friends to come to our house. I prepared you a small buffet to celebrate. Tell them to join us.” Mom said when she goes on my way near the stage.

“Sure, Mom. Wait for me for a minute.” I said then kissed her cheek.

Nauna na siyang umalis patungo sa SUV namin sa parking lot kasama ang mga nag-assist sa akin kanina.

I also already have changed my gown into my simple short dress.

I invited Sean and Maica to come over and they said that they will come. Naglakad na rin ako paalis, nauna na rin sila Maica at magpapalit pa raw sila ng damit bago sila magtungo sa amin.

Madilim na ngayon sa campus at iilang lamp post lang din ang nakabukas pero maliwanag parin naman.

May ilang bumabati sa akin habang naglalakad ako. Hindi ko naman maiwasang tingnan sila at ngitian at saka magpapasalamat kalaunan.

I didn’t expect this to happen. Na mananalo ako at mabilis na nag-iba ang turing ng ibang tao sa akin.

Before they are not even approaching me. Bihira lang din nila akong kausapin, kaya hindi mawala wala ang ngiting nakaguhit sa mga labi ko ngayon. Because now, they are all greeting me naturally.

I reached the parking lot. Lumingon lingon pa ako at hinahanap kung saan ba nakapark yung sasakyan namin. And I almost jumped a bit when I saw Ace standing beside his black aston martin car. He’s now wearing his simple white tee with his black pants.

Then I noticed that he slowly walks towards my way. Nagtataka akong nakatingin sa kaniya. Ako ba ang lalapitan niya?

Napalingon pa ako sa aking bandang likuran at bandang gilid ko at makitang wala namang tao ro’n

And when I realize that he is really walking towards my way, my breathe immediately heave. My heart pounded so loud as he continued walking straight into me.

Napakurap kurap naman ako. I was struggling with my breathing. My heart was beating so fast. And when he’s now finally in front of me. Naglilikot ang mga mata ko at hindi ako mapakali sa aking kinatatayuan.

I can smell his scent. It was a mixture of an expensive male body wash and perfume. It seems that he got home first before going here. He looked so clean and fresh as I looked at him.

“Your dad texted me. He said that I’ll pick you up here. Come on I’ll drive you home.” he then said in a deep large voice.

Napamaang akong bumaling ng tingin sa kaniya. Bakit naman ako ipapasundo ni Dad sa kaniya? Bakit hindi nalang sa driver namin? And where is my Mom? Nandito lang ang SUV namin dahil nagpaalam akong hintayin nila ako rito.

“H-Huh? But my Mom is just here. I’ll just need to find if where they parked the car. Maybe they are waiting for me.” I said as my heart hammering so fast. I can even hear the loud beat of my chest throbs.

He moved a bit and lowered his gaze on me. He was towering over me now. He’s tall and my height raises just above on his shoulder.

“Your mom is in your house now. Kaya sumabay ka na sa akin. Alam niya rin na ako susundo sa’yo,” he uttered in a serious tone.

I only nodded my head as my response. Then I followed him towards his car when his intimidating stared seems not to leave my sight if I shouldn’t go with him.

Napakaseryoso niyang tingnan. That is why I find him intimidating. 

Nasa likod niya lang ako habang naglalakad. I already changed my gown kanina at the backstage into a simple white floral print long sleeve mini dress. Medyo malamig na nga lang sa pakiramdam dahil above the knee ito kahit na may long sleeve.

Napahinto ako sa paglalakad nang tumigil ito sa harapan ko. Huminto siya sa gilid ng sasakyan at pinagbuksan ako ng pinto.

“Thank you,” I said softly but in a low voice. He just looked at me then nodded.

He’s so serious. While I was here struggling for my breath while him standing seriously looking at me.

I looked away. Tumikhim pa siya bago sinarado ang pinto ng sasakyan nang makaupo ako sa loob nito.

His car scent was good. It has some freshener there that makes the smells good and the interior looks luxurious. Well, he’s Ventura anyway. He’s one of the elites families all over Asia. Baka nga isa lang ito sa cheapest car na meron siya.

Napatingin ako ng tuwid sa harapan ko at napaayos ng upo nang makapasok na siya sa loob ng sasakyan. He’s intimidating air made me shiver a bit. Pinaandar na niya ang sasakyan at nag-umpisa na kaming umalis.

We’re both silent the whole time. I tried to look at him. And I saw his jaw clenched.

Why is it moving? Tanong ko sa sarili at takang taka na nakatitig doon.

“Don’t you know that staring at someone is rude?” he said in a husky deep voice.

It doesn’t seem that he was irritated or something because his voice was gentle when he spat it. Ngunit agad pa rin naman akong nag-iwas ng tingin sa kaniya.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to-” he then immediately cutted me off

“No, it’s ok. I used to it when it comes to you.” makahulugang anito.

My forehead creased as my heart began to hammer on its cage. Napakurap kurap naman ako ng ilang sandali pang napalunok.

Nahuhuli niya ba akong tumititig sa kaniya kaya sanay na siya pagdating sa akin? But how? I’d always looked away when I noticed him turning his glare on me. I gulped. Pumirmi nalang ako ng upo at tumingin sa labas ng bintana ng kaniyang sasakyan.

Medyo malayo pa kami sa bahay. Hindi naman traffic but I find his driving was slow. O sadyang pakiramdam ko lang ay parang ang bagal ng oras dahil siya ang kasama ko?

Naiilang ako sa kaniya kaya hindi ko na siya binalingan muli. Tahimik kaming nakarating ng bahay. I unbuckle my seatbelt at nauna ng lumabas ng sasakyan.

I was about to say thank you to Ace when I saw Dad walking towards our way pagkababang pagkababa naming dalawa ni Ace ng sasakyan.

“Hijo! Salamat at nasundo mo ang unica hija ko! Sorry for the hassle.” ani Dad at saka ako nilapitan.

Ngumiti ako kay at saka siya hinalikan sa pisngi.

“Congratulations Blair! I heard from your Mom that you win the pageant,” he said, smiling widely at me.

“Yes po, thanks Dad.”

Akala ko ay aalis na si Ace pauwi. Kaya bahagyang akong nalungkot sa kaalamang iyon. At saglit naman akong nagulat nang biglang magsalita si Daddy.

“Tara hijo! Dine with us. We prepared lots of food inside dahil nanalo itong si Blair. Her friends are also gonna be here soon. Come on join us!” Dad happily invited him as he invited Ace to my small celebration.

Ace then glance at me before he turned his gaze to Dad like he’s checking what would be my reaction to it.

“Sigi po.” He then agreed and accept Dad’s invite.

Nauna na akong maglakad papasok sa loob ng bahay habang saposapo ko ang kumakalabog kong dibdib. Para akong nahihirapan sa paghinga sa kaalamang dito ulit siya mag dinner sa amin.

Part of me was excited to see him dine with us and at the same time, I was tensed to know that he’s gonna be here again. Gosh, I need to be looked fine.

Kaya inayos ko ang paglalakad ko at hindi nagpahalatang kinakabahan nang maramdaman kong nakasunod ang kaniyang mga yabag sa aking likuran.

Kabanata 15

Kabanata 15

Goodnight

“Blair! What took you so long? Kanina pa kami nandito. Akala ko naman ay mauuna ka na sa amin!” Maica hissed as I went inside our house.

“Ah, Mom wasn’t there na pala kaya medyo natagalan ako. Pinasundo lang ako dahil nauna na pala siya dito.” I said and I felt my cheeks flushed.

“Gano’n ba? Kaya pala nandito na si Tita at ikaw ay wala pa. By the way, who drives you home?” She asked normally.

I then swallowed hard. Shit! Anong sasabihin ko? Wait, ano naman kung sabihin kong si Ace yung sumundo sa akin? Maybe she will think about it in a different way if she knows that! But… Well, I believe she already forgot it, our last talk about Ace.

I looked at her and didn’t speak. I was just silently staring at her.

“Never mind. Tara na sa dining, I’m starving!” she sulked but exclaimed at the same time.

Sean was behind her looking at me with a wide smile. He walked towards me but he stops. Nakakapit na rin sa aking braso si Maica when he noticed Sean.

“Oh? Bakit hindi pa kayo tumutungo sa aming dining? I know you all starving kids! Tara na hijo! Don’t be shy. Mga kaibigan lang ’yan ng anak ko.” Dad said then looked in Ace’s way. Nauna na itong naglakad papunta ng dining room.

Ace was just there and standing proudly.

I frantically looked at them. I turn my gaze to Maica and saw how she was shocked to see Ace in here! She’s actually very surprised! Her mouth was dropped open. Then she looked at me with her eyes wide open and brows shot up.

Kinakabahan naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Pinipilit kong ngumiti, but I can’t. I just wish she wouldn’t think something about it. For sure she’s now thinking about me and what is my feelings for Ace! I bit my lower lips harshly in that thought.

Sa pagkakakilala ko pa naman sa babaeng ito e’ masyadong matalas ang pandama. She knows what you feel and what you’re thinking.

I don’t know if I was just that transparent that she can easily determine what I’m up to. But one thing I know she has in mind right now. I just hope it’s not that.

“Ace?!” Maica exclaimed like she was amused by his presence here in our house.

What? Did I hear it right? She calls him ‘Ace’ where’s her sign of respect? Sa pagkakaalala ko ‘Kuya Ace’ ang tawag nito dito, but why now change?

But then I saw Sean smiled at Ace like they were friends. “Hey, bro!” Sean said then come near to him.

Kasali rin naman sa varsity si Sean kaya hindi na ako magtataka if they know each other.

“Hey, man.” Ace just simply uttered to Sean. He looks cool the way he said it. It seems like it was normal to them greeting friends on that way.

Ace glance at Maica’s way afterward. He looked at her curiously. His brow was a bit elevated.

“Yes?” Then he asked her.

Napapantastikuhan namang tumawa ng bahagya si Maica. She was laughing faux. At napangiwi ako ron.

“Ikaw pala yan! You’re invited? So you are close to Blair?” She asked him curiously.

She then looked at me mockingly. Her gaze was doubtful na pinanlakihan niya pa ako ng mata. Then the smirked tugged on her lips afterward.

I looked away and brows creased at Maica’s reaction. Ano bang ginagawa nitong babaeng ’to? Why did she ask Ace things like this? She knows that we’re not even close! I sighed and shook my head. I suddenly feel embarrassed.

Napakamot ako ng bahagya sa noo ko.

“No. Her father invited me.” I heard Ace answered her question. He’s on his serious mode again.

“Ahh, I thought it was Blair who invited you.” Nagtataka pa kunwareng tanong ni Maica kay Ace.

I sighed heavily. What is she talking about?! It’s like, her words have a double meaning! I need to do something to divert their attention. Tutal wala pa namang kumpirmasyon sa akin ang mga iniisip nitong si Maica.

She’s unbelievable! She makes me look like I have a crush on Ace. Bakit wala ba? I almost leered my eyes in my own thought. Of course… I don’t know. I’m not sure!

“T-tara na! Uhm, punta na tayo sa kusina baka lumamig pa yung mga pagkain.” I then suddenly inserted to them. And in a sudden, they turned their gazes on me.

I was slightly panicking but I managed myself to be looked fine.

“Let’s go then,” Sean said, agreeing with me.

Sabay kaming naglakad patungo sa kusina habang si Maica naman ay napansin kong sumunod narin sa aming dalawa ni Sean. I didn’t take a look at Ace and just ignored his presence.

Thank God that Maica is now finally out of her curiosity.

We sat on our chairs and started our meal. The food was fine. Mom really knows the best when it comes to a buffet. About the best foods. She graduated in culinary arts and I can say that she has different degrees.

Maica is sitting beside me. Si Dad naman ay nasa kabisera while Mom is on her right side so I was on his left. Beside mom was Ace. At sa tabi ko naman ay sina Maica at Sean. At sa kabilang side naman malapit kay Ace ay ang makeup artist ko at ang tumulong sa pag-assist kay Mom sa aking mga damit.

They greeted me first again. They are now talking about how good I was at the ramp earlier. I was just smiling at my Mom who tells her opinion about it.

“Blair did a great job, indeed. Sabi pa nga ng trainer na kinuha ko para sa iyo ay pwede ka raw mag-modeling. But I refused. You’re so young for that and if you will ramp a designer cloth I think it’s okay. But for now, the photoshoot was enough.” Mom said then continued eating her food.

I was amazed for a moment. Mom will let me do a photoshoot? For sure it’s an expensive apparel!

“Well, okay lang naman din sa akin kung ’yan ang gusto ng anak mo,” Dad spoke.

I looked at them and just nod. I was surprised that they will let me do it. Even I have no any idea on how it all gonna happened if ever I really go into this industry.

“By the way, kilala niyo pala itong si Ace?” Dad then asked us profusely.

I shifted at my sit. Maica glanced at me. I lifted my gaze on her. And she was smiling at me widely. Like she was teasing me.

Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. For sure, she already assumed that I have a crush on Ace. I sighed at that thought.

“Yes po, we’re schoolmates,” Sean politely replied to my Dad.

“So nakikita mo pala itong si Blair, Ace sa eskwelahan ninyo kung gano’n? It’s good to know that you’re in the same school.” Dad told nonchalantly.

I felt Ace took a glance at me before he looked at my Dad. My heart thumped.

“Hindi naman po madalas,” he just simply answered.

And by that, I immediately felt my cheeks reddened for a while.

“Ah! Nakikita lang po namin si Ace minsan kapag break time sa cafeteria.” Maica suddenly spoke.

Shit! Why does she have to intervene in the conversation of others! Bakit hindi nalang siya manahimik?!

Nakaramdam naman agad ako ng matinding kaba. Mabilis ang kabog ng aking puso at hindi alam kung bakit ba ganito ang epekto sa akin ng mga sinasabi ni Maica. Bahagya pa akong nag-panic pero hindi ako nagpahalata.

I relaxed for a short period of time. Breathe in, breathe out. Wait! Bakit ba ako kinakabahan ng ganito e’ wala naman akong dapat na ikabahala.

It was just a simple conversation and I immediately felt nervous and worried about it? I need to relax, okay?

Marahan akong umupo ng tuwid para umayos ang upo at pustura ng aking katawan. I looked at my Dad who looked in my way also. Our eyes met.

“Gano’n ba?” he said while his eyes are all on me then he shifted it turning back in Ace’s way.

“Kung gano’n pwede palang sabay na kayong pumunta rito pauwi kapag may pag-uusapan tayo about the projects,” Dad muttered to Ace sounding like it’s an idea.

“It’s fine with me, Tito. If that’s okay to your daughter.” Ace uttered then took a glance at me.

My heart pounding so loud. What’s the problem with my heart? Why am I hyperventilating? Hindi mapakali ang mga mata ko sa pagtingin kung saan saan.

And he said what? It’s fine with him to drive me home? Well if his way home is in our house I think it’s just okay if he’ll give me a drive. And it’s my Dad who says it.

Tsaka pupunta siya sa amin for the project? What projects? So does it mean na mapapadalas siya dito sa amin? Oh my god.

As if namang umangal siya? Is he just constrained because it’s my Dad who gave him a favor? I hope he’s not. I shifted my gaze on Ace and my heart almost burst out when our gaze met.

I promptly looked away and sipped on my glass.

Nagulat naman ako bahagya nang maramdamang may kumikislot sa paanan ko. Nagtataka naman akong sumilip sa sahig. At napangiwi ako ng makita kong paa pala iyon ni Maica.

I looked at her with questioning eyes and my brows were slightly elevated.

“I smell something fishy, huh?” She mumbled beside me then plaster a teasing smile for me.

My forehead creased in frustration.

“H-huh? Ano bang sinasabi mo?” I asked her like I’m innocent of what she is saying.

“’Yan ka na naman. You’re acting like you didn’t know what I meant! Be yourself girl! Admit it!” Her voice was slightly raised but it’s still in a whisper.

I gasped. Nangangapa na naman ako ng mga salita. What’s wrong with Maica at this moment? Hindi ba siya makapaghintay na sabihin ko nalang sa kaniya? Ang babaeng ’to talaga. She’s always curious and I feel pressure at the same time embarrass that Ace is here and she talks like I always count on her about him.

And she said what? Admit? Admit what? Ano naman ang aaminin ko sa kaniya? I sighed.

The dinner was overall fine. I didn’t talk at Maica that much and Sean was just also silent the whole time. I saw him sometimes staring at me but he immediately looked away when he saw me glancing at him too.

Tiningnan ko ng mariin si Maica kalaunan pagkatapos namin sa hapag kainan. Pinaparating na huwag na siyang magsalita pa. 

“Congratulations ulit Blair! I’m so proud of you my friend! Paniguradong naglulumpasay na ngayon sa lungkot si Elena dahil ikaw ang nakabingwit sa korona.” Maica said then she laughed a bit afterward.

I smiled at her. Now I feel relief that she’s bringing up a different topic.

“Hmm. So back to the topic. Bakit Ace lang tawag mo kay Ace? Huh?” she asked me mockingly.

I sighed heavily. My brows shot up and didn’t expect her sudden question about Ace. Buti nalang at nandito kami ngayon sa salas habang sila Sean at Ace ay naiwan sa hapag kasama sila Dad at Mom.

“Ah. Dahil ’yon yung gusto kong tawag?” I said hesitantly and winced at her later on.

“I know that you are lying, Blair. Don’t use it to me. I know you better kaya hindi mo ako maloloko.” aniya na bahagya pang nakangisi habang ang mga mata’y nagdududang nakamasid sa akin.

I gulped. I bit my lip. I nervously stared at her this time.

“I don’t know. H-Hindi ko din alam. Basta ang alam ko hindi ako kumportable kapag alam kong nandiyan lang siya sa paligid.” I now confessed to her.

She’s staring at me seriously. As if she was listening carefully to everything I will gonna say.

“You have a crush on him. I bet!” she then grunted nonchalantly. She shifted at her sit and slightly caressed her hair. She was staring at me with a teasing smirk tugged on her lips.

“Huh?! Ano ka ba naman? I just find him intimidating that’s why I’m not comfortable.” I answered her confidently but I was panicking inside.

“Okay! Sabi mo eh.” nakanguso pang anito.

Para akong nakakita nang multo ng biglang lumabas sila dad kasama si Ace at Sean galing sa dining area. I composed myself to sit properly. Nakatungo ang noo akong bumaling kay Maica na may nakakalokong ngiti.

I looked at her intently. I even widened my eyes as I looked at her. Stopping her from speaking. Maica then sighed loudly.

We both shut up and looked at each other. And when she stood up and I do the same way.

“Congrats Blair and thank you for the dinner.” Pagbati pa muli sa akin ni Sean.

At saka kunwari pang napaubo si Maica sa aking tabi.

“Uuwi na kami Blair, it’s getting late na rin kasi. Thanks for the dinner,” si Maica na animong wala kaming pinag-uusapang kakaiba kanina.

“Salamat din sa pagpunta. Maica, Sean take care, ingat kayo sa biyahe pauwi.” I said then walked with them towards our gate outside our house.

“Bye Blair! Don’t forget to say goodnight to him!” she shouted then went inside their car.

My forehead creased as my lips slightly protruded from what she just said. Kami lang ngayon ang nasa labas at naiwan si Ace kasama sila Mom sa loob kaya siguro malakas ang loob nitong sumigaw ngayon.

Tinanguan naman ako ni Sean. “Goodnight! Just see you tomorrow,” he said then open the door of his car’s driver seat.

I waved my hand at them, saying my goodbye.

“Bye! Salamat ulit sa pagpunta. Sean, ingat sa pagmaneho.” Pasigaw ko pang habol sa kanila.

Maica opens the car’s window kaya paniguradong narinig ako niyon. Nakita ko pa siyang ngumisi at saka kumaway sa akin.

“Bye Blair! Bye Ace, huwag ka ng umuwi, diyan ka na matulog kila Blair!” she shouted then laugh hysterically as the car started moving on.

I bit my lip because of what she just said. Napailing iling ako at saka bahagyang napabuntong hininga.

Pasalamat ka at wala dito si Ace, buti at hindi niya narinig ’yang mga pinagsasasabi mo Maica. We left Ace inside with my Mom and Dad para mahatid ko sila dito sa labas.

“Should I sleep here instead?” his low baritone voice filled my ears.

I blinked then my eyes abruptly widened. My lips parted as my heartbeat began on its race. Na para bang nag-uunahan ito sa pagkabog ng mabilis at malakas.

I gulped hardly and slightly frozed at my place when his voice registered in my hearing.

I heard his low husky voice coming from my back. So he’s there the whole time? Kung gano’n ay narinig niya yung mga sinabi ni Maica? That girl! Aughh! Humanda talaga siya sa akin bukas.

Wala paring preno sa pagtibok itong naghuhuramentado kong puso. And when I heard footsteps approaching me, my feet rooted to where I am standing right now.

I hurriedly turn around and looked at him bago pa man ako tuluyang lamunin ng lupa. And my eyes widened in panic when I felt his body in front of me.

His manly scent immediately filled my nose. And his expensive perfume falls me into a daze. His eyes were intently looking straight into my eyes. The astonished gloomy grey eyes I have only seen from afar are now near in front of me.

His brows were thick, his nose was narrow and perfect for his high cheekbones and his luscious red thin lips were parted.

I looked down as I could no longer bear to glance at him. I gulped and move backward.

“D-Did you hear what she said?” I stuttered as I spoke. Kinakabahan at ano mang oras ay pakiramdam ko ay tatakbo nalang agad ako paalis.

“Uh-huh,” his deep husky voice mumbled.

“J-Just ignore what Maica said! W-Wala lang yung mga sinabi niya.” nahihiyang ani ko.

He didn’t say anything. So I slowly raised my eyes to him. I saw him licking his lower lip. I swallowed hard when I felt my throat dried.

Seryoso lang siyang nakatingin sa akin ngayon nang maglapat ang aming mga tingin.

“Congrats… Blair,” he then said hoarsely after a long deafening silence in between us.

My lips parted as I looked at him uttered it word by word. It’s like a beautiful song in my ears when I heard his low manly voice.

He’s near on me. Inches away actually. Napabaling ako ng tingin sa aking dibdib nang maramdaman ko na naman ang naghuhuramentado kong puso.

“Thank you… Uhmm,” I said but I can’t continue what I about to say.

I looked at him. His eyes were asking as he looked at me.

Hindi ko matuloy tuloy ang sasabihin ko dahil sa nakakailang at nakakaintimida nitong mga matangsa akin nakatutop.

Should I ask him if he watched me answering the question? Or he has watched me till the end? But why I didn’t see him after the casual wear?

I know it isn’t right to ask him like that. We’re not even friends, so what’s the use of asking him? But part of me wants to know if he finished watching the pageant. I sighed then looked at him.

“What?” he asked me in a smooth and very low voice. Ani mong nababasa niya ang laman ng aking isipan nang tanungin niya ako no’n.

We’re here in front of our house. The guards are far from us kaya hindi kami masyadong pansin. And our spot was in dim light as well.

I bit my lower lip before I uttered.

“Uuwi ka na?” I asked. Kahit na hindi naman ’yon ang gusto kong itanong sa kaniya.

He just remains to stare at me with his serious glares. And I was amazed when I saw him smiled a bit later on. My eyes were amused when I heard him chuckled a bit after he took a glance at me.

I felt my cheeks flushed.

I looked away. For sure my cheeks are now reddening. I panicked so I get away from his stares on me para hindi niya mapansin ’yon.

“Yup. Goodbye Blair…Goodnight,”  he said then pat my head softly.

I felt his hand over my head.

I looked at him shocked by his sudden move. He’s still smiling at me, genuinely. I swallowed hard. 

Our eyes locked on each other for a moment. And my heart throbs like it’s on its battlefield. Panting and actively throbbing wildly as his eyes directed on me

Then later on he started walking away towards his Aston martin. He didn’t look back at tuloy tuloy na pumasok sa loob ng kaniyang sasakyan at pinaandar iyon kalaunan.

Napakurap kurap pa ako ng ilang sandali bago naproseso kung ano ba ang nangyari. He pats my head and disheveled it a bit! He just holds me! And he said what? Oh my gosh. He said ’goodnight to me!

Napakagat labi pa ako ron nang ngayon lang pumasok sa aking isipan ang nangyari. Pinigilan ko rin ang malaking ngiti na kusang kumakawala sa aking labi.

I wish we can bond some time. He seems good to me. I find him serious and intimidating but the reality is, he’s kind and adorable when I saw his smile.

My eyes glisten as I remember it. I was now here in my room. Staring blankly at the ceiling. Smiling crazily as I remembered and doing a flashback of him in my mind about what happened earlier.

Kabanata 16

Kabanata 16

Kid

I woke up early the next morning and I started fixing myself. I go to my bathroom and take a bath. It’s still early than my usual time.

Maybe I am excited to go to school for today? I smiled sheepishly then I felt my cheeks flushed. I bit my lower lip as I went out of my room and go downstairs to our dining area.

Dad was there with Mom nang makarating ako.

“Good morning,” I greeted then approached them.

I kissed their cheeks as I said it. They greeted me back.

They look serious when I came, so I didn’t ask them if what they are talking about. Labas na ako sa usapan nang mga magulang ko. Hindi rin namang maganda na makisali pa ako sa usapan nila.

“So what about the project again?” Mom said. He looked at Dad who’s now sipping on his cup of coffee.

“Ang mga Fuentes ay nag-alok ng isang malaking project sa kumpanya ng mga Ventura. As if the Ventura’s doesn’t have enough capacity and capability to make their own big projects. In fact, they can make it bigger than the proposal they had given to us.” Dad said and I saw him shifted on his sit.

I started eating my food and tried to not listen to them.

“For sure it was a cheap project for the Ventura. Kita naman sa mga real estate nila, not just here in the Philippines but all over Asia. Maybe that senator Fuentes is just making his alibi to make it with the most influential and richest family here in our country. To used them for their platforms and ongoing projects, na ipapangako sa bayan.” Mom explained while her forehead was a bit creased.

“Yeah. ’Yan din ang iniisip ng mga Ventura ngayon. Dahil kilala naman natin ang mga Fuentes na ganid. They are just acting kind for a show.” Dad hissed then looked at me.

Naramdaman ko ang pagbaling ng tingin nito sa akin.

“Blair, is it okay with you na iba nalang ang susundo sa’yo mamaya after school?” Dad asked me. He looked worried but he hesitantly asked me that.

What? Why? I mean wala ba ’yung mga drivers namin mamaya?

Napakurap kurap ako ng bahagya. Tumingin ako sa aking pinggan saka ko binalingan ng tingin ang aking ama.

“It’s fine with me Dad,” I consent then looked back at my plate again

I want to ask them if we do not have a driver who can come after me later. Kaso mukhang problemado si Dad at Mom sa pinag-uusapan nila kanina, kaya hindi nalang ako nagtanong.

“Sorry, sweety. May lakad kasi kami ng Dad mo para mamaya and it’s a big convention kaya baka mawala kami ng dalawang araw. But maybe tomorrow evening nandito na kami or in the next day.” Mom informed me softly.

I glanced at her. Nagulat ako nang sabihin niya ’yon. Mom and Dad were always in the convention before and it was the sad days for me without them.

Lagi silang kasama ron dati lalo na nung nag-uumpisa pa lang si Daddy sa larangan niya. Kinakailangan niyang dumalo ron, dahil madalas na rin siyang maimbitahan lalo na at siya ang madalas na hinahanap ng mga politicians.

I didn’t know why. Pero kahit businessmen and structural firms ay si Dad ang madalas nilang makuha at mairekomenda. Kaya siguro ganoon na lamang ang pagkasabik nito sa kaniya.

I felt a bit sad when I heard Mom say it.

“Uhm. Can I come?” nangungusap kong sabi kay Mom.

Nakakalungkot na aalis sila ni Dad para sa convention kahit na alam kong importante iyon. Maiinip at malulungkot ako at the same na wala sila sa bahay. Our house is big at ako lang kasama ang iilang mga kasambahay namin ang nandito sa loob.

I’m not close to our servants here except to Manang Soling. She’s kind but a bit strict when it comes to the chores of the house.

“Hindi pwede anak. And you also have your classes. You’re a big girl now. Two days from now and its the weekend. Nandito na naman kami non by that time.” mom said assuring me.

My lips protruded. Nakalimutan kong may pasok pa nga pala kami. Pero ayos lang din naman kung lumiban ako sa klase pero ayaw ko naman na may absent na ako for the third quarter.

I nodded my head. Mom smiled at me.

“Manang is just here lang naman kaya don’t worry, alright?” Mom uttered.

“Uuwian ka rin naman namin ng pasalubong kaya huwag ka ng malungkot,” Dad said playfully.

Agad namang may sumilay na ngiti sa mga labi ko nang marinig ko ’yon.

Dad knows me well. He always bought me souvenirs and sometimes it’s food, things or dresses. He always spoils me and I like it. That’s why I love my Dad so much!

“Yeah. We both know you love pasalubong.” Mom inserted.

My smile became more widely. “Okay, fine. Thanks, Mom and Dad. Ingat po kayo sa biyahe.” I said as I stood from my sit.

“Take care as well, sweetie.”

Dad hugs me and I hugged them back.

I went out of our car nang marating ko ang school. Bahagya pa akong nagulat nang makita si Clark sa harapan ko. His hair was a bit damp but the water were not dripping. It was fixed in a clean stylish way. Maybe it was his hair gel?

“Ah, good morning Blair.” He said, genuinely smiling at me.

Then my forehead creased as I glanced at him.

“Good morning din Clark.” I hesitantly said.

His eyes glistened with amusement.

“So you remember me?” he inquired.

“Oo naman. You’re one of the varsity team.” I said while my brows were puckered.

“Yes,” he drawled deeply.

He seems cool and mature and as I know he’s in grade ten now.

Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Boys rarely go in my way kaya nakakapagtaka. Maybe yesterday, was one of those days that people approached me but it’s just because I win the pageant.

“Flowers for you beautiful Blair,” he said and boyishly smiled at me afterward.

Natitigilan at namamangha naman akong napabaling sa isang lumpon ng bulaklak na ibinigay nito sa akin.

“For what? But… Thank you,” I uttered with a surprised visible in my expression.

This is my first time receiving a bouquet from a guy. Kaya hindi mawala wala ang ngiti at pagkamangha sa aking mga labi habang tinatanaw iyong inilalagay sa bisig ko.

“Gusto ko sanang manligaw,” he then said that made me stop for a second.

The smile on my lips slowly faded.

I could not help but look at him.

“L-Ligaw?” I asked him slightly shocked.

“Yes, I will court you if you only say yes to me,” he said playfully.

Hindi ko naman naramdaman ang sinseridad niya nang sinabi niya iyon.

I don’t like him and I can say that he’s not my type. He’s cute okay! But I just really find him a playboy. To be a fact, he’s a notorious playboy here on our campus.

I was about to say that I’m sorry if I can’t answer him for a yes when someone approached me from behind.

She clung her arms to mine.

“Suitor alarming Blair,” she suddenly said.

Narinig niya ba ang sinabi ni Clark?

“I was there kanina pa and look around, halos lahat ng nandito nakatingin sa inyo.” bahagya pang napangiwi si Maica pagkatapos niyang sabihin iyon.

I looked around and was stunned consume when I notice their glare on us.

Ang iba naman ay nakangiting nakatingin kay Clark na parang sinusuportahan ito sa ginagawa. Maraming estudyante at halos ang ibang napapadaan ay napapatingin din sa amin. Because we are also near on the gate.

Mabilis tuloy akong nakaramdam ng kaba dahil sa maraming tao ang nakatingin at mukhang nag-aabang nang isasagot ko kay Clark.

“Ah, kasi Clark an-” and then someone cutted me off.

“She’s too young for having a suitor. And she didn’t like you.” Sean suddenly uttered from beside me.

My eyes widen when I saw Sean’s dead glare on Clark.

“Bakit Sean? May gusto ka rin siguro dito kay Blair kaya dinadahilan mo lang ’yang mga sinasabi mo, dahil ayaw mong maunahan ka.” mayabang na ani Clark.

Nagulat naman ako sa sinabi nito at bahagya ng umatras at hihilain na sana si Maica at Sean para makaalis na kami.

I don’t want a fight. I don’t want a commotion. So as much as possible iiwasan ko nalang. And for what Clark said, he’s serious. Na parang naghahamon ang boses nito.

Maica didn’t move. I looked at her but she didn’t do the same.

“Yes. I like Blair. That’s why I’m saying this to you. Get away from her.” mariing ani Sean na nagpatigil sa akin.

I was stunned when I heard Sean say it. I know he has a crush on me but the whole time when I was with him, he never confesses his feelings.

It’s not that I’m waiting for him to confess. I just only want confirmation towards the meaning of his actions and to confront him that we’re only just friends.

Sean looked at me in the eyes. I was looking at him too.

“I like you, Blair. I know na masyado akong maaga pero ayaw ko lang na maunahan ako ng iba.” he sincerely said.

My lips parted as I paused on breathing for a while.

“You know what? Umagang umaga at ganito na ang mga ganap. Let’s go Blair male-late na tayo sa klase natin!” Maica suddenly spoke.

She pulled me away from Sean and Clark who’s now standing and glaring at each other. They both looked dismayed when I now slowly walking away because of Maica’s hand on my wrist. Pulling me away out of that surprising circle.

We’re now taking our sits inside our room when she spoke.

“Ganda mo talaga friend! Nanalo lang ng Ms. Intramurals may nanliligaw na agad?” She said mockingly.

Bahagya naman akong napangiwi. I put down the bouquet on my table. Baka ilagay ko nalang ’to mamaya sa locker ko para hindi ako mahirapan sa pagbitbit.

“But Blair, please don’t hurt my cousin.” Maica seems so serious when she says that.

I gulped. “Pero Maica, I don’t like Sean and you know that,” I said worriedly honest on her.

I want to be honest on her dahil ayaw ko namang paasahin siya at isiping may pag-asa si Sean.

“I know because you like Ace,” she probed then smirked on me languidly.

Namilog naman ang mga mata kong tumingin sa kaniya. Natigilan.

“Kahit hindi mo sa akin sabihin alam ko. So don’t deny it girl.” nakangising aniya.

I didn’t speak. Then I sighed heavily. Then the morning class started, kaya hindi na rin kami nakapag-usap pa ni Maica. But when lunch break came,

“Let’s go, Blair! Bilisan mo na riyan, nagugutom na ako.”

“Mauna ka na muna Maica. Pupunta pa ako ng locker room. I’ll just gonna put this flower on my locker.” I replied as I raised the bouquet in my hand.

“Fine! Make it fast okay? I’ll order you a lunch,” she said then started walking away out of our room.

Inaayos ko lang ang ibang gamit ko bago ako tuluyang lumakad at umalis na rin. Nagtungo na ako ng locker room.

The hallway was silent when I got there. There are no people here. They are in the cafeteria now for sure, because it’s lunchtime.

I walked towards my locker and I halt from taking steps when I heard some whispers. I slowly walk towards the sound where it came from. It was just near the side of my locker when I find out the chirping low noise was from.

Sumilip ako ng bahagya sa pakaliwang bahagi ng hallway para sana tingnan kung ano ’yon.

“You said you like me. I thought you’re a serious type of man. But you are just like with others… you just playing around.” I saw Lisa muttered as her tears flowing down her cheeks.

“I didn’t say anything like that. You are just assuming things. I’m sorry, but please stop pretending that you are my girlfriend. We’re just friends.”  I heard a familiar low baritone voice. He said it softly to Lisa.

I can’t see him because he’s on the left side and Lisa was on the right side, which I can perfectly see her.

I froze when I realized it was Ace’s voice. Then I gasped when I realize what am I doing in here. I’m eavesdropping for Pete’s sake!

Alam kong mali ang makinig sa usapan ng iba and here I am doing it! But no, I just accidentally hear them talking and I get curious so I trace where that voice is coming from. And in surprise it was them. I didn’t intend it.

Natauhan lang ako sa ginagawa ko nang mabitiwan ko ang bungkos ng bulaklak na hawak ko. Lumikha ito ng mahinang tunog pero dinig na dinig iyon dahil tahimik ang buong hall.

Natataranta ko itong pinulot nagbabakasakaling hindi nila iyon mapansin.

“Who is that?” Her broken voice asked.

Tumayo ako at nagmamadaling tumalikod na, handa ng tumakbo paalis. But when I felt his hand holding my wrist. I froze in place. I didn’t look at him. I remain my sight on the floor.

Nananatili akong nakatalikod sa kaniya at hindi ko siya hinarap nang mahuli niya ang aking palapulsuhan nang aamba na ako sa pag-alis.

“Blair? Is that you? Anong ginagawa mo rito?” I heard Lisa’s voice asked me.

I let a heavy sigh. I have nowhere to escape now, they found me. Kaya dahan dahan akong humarap sa kanila.

Ace let go of the hold from my wrist when I finally glance at him. He looks serious and humid when his eyes met mine. His thick brows were now on the lift while his thin red lips are in a grim line. Like he was controlling his temper.

I swallowed hard.

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hear your voices. I was walking here and accidentally my flowers slid from my hold.” nagmamadaling paliwanag ko sa kanila.

Iniwas ko ang aking tingin kay Ace dahil hindi ko ito matagalan. Mukha siyang galit at naiinis sa akin na hindi ko magagawang tagalan ang pagtingin ro’n.

I feel like I was at fault now. And he needs to lecture me.

I was holding my both hands, twitching at each other because of the nervousness.

“Are you eavesdropping?” Ace suddenly asked.

I looked at him hurriedly.

Umawang ng bahagya ang aking mga labi at naghahanap ng maisasagot. Napalunok ako dahil hindi ko alam kung aamin ako o hindi. But I really didn’t intend it to happen.

“I s-said that I was just walking here and accidentally I-”

“It didn’t answer my question,” he said coldly.

Bumuntong-hininga nalang ako dahil halata naman na kung anong dahilan at nandito ako.

But hey! Naglalakad lang naman talaga ako dito kanina nang may narinig akong nag-uusap. It’s not my hobby to eavesdrop, kaya hindi ko rin alam kung bakit pa ako nakinig sa kanila.

And I was curious by their voice that’s why… that’s why I find out where is that mumbling noise is coming from.

“Let’s not make it a big deal, Ace. Blair, you should shut up, huwag mo nalang ipagsabi ’yong mga narinig mo. Your just a kid to make our a gossip. So better back off.” Lisa retorted as she dried her cheeks from crying.

“Stop scaring her Lisa.” Ace reprimanded.

“Y-Yeah of course, saka wala naman akong narinig.” I then inserted to what Lisa said to me.

“Really? Denying it in front of us? Huling huli ka na Blair na nakikinig ka sa usapan namin. Tapos itatanggi mo pa?!” Lisa yelled at me.

I almost jump on my place when her sudden rise of voice crept on me.

“Do not shout at her, Lisa.” mariing ani Ace.

Like he was threatening Lisa for shouting at me. I saw how Lisa’s lips parted and shivered in shock by Ace’s words.

Kinakabahan naman akong nag-angat ng tingin sa kaniya. I jump a bit when our gaze met. He was seriously looking at me but his eyes became soften when he saw my frightened stares at him.

Tumalikod si Ace.

“Where are you going? We’re not done talking!” Lisa exclaimed at him.

Ace didn’t bother to stop walking and even turn his head for Lisa, he didn’t dare. Nagtuloy tuloy lang siya sa paglalakad hanggang sa tuluyan siyang makatakas sa aking paningin.

Nagmamadali naman akong tumalikod na rin pabalik sa locker ko para ilagay don ang bulaklak na hawak ko.

“It’s your fault Blair! Kung sana hindi ka nakinig sa pinag-uusapan namin, edi sana nagkabalikan pa kami!” she exclaimed at me.

Nahinto ako sa paglalakad. Bahagya akong nakaramdam ng sakit at matinding kaba sa aking dibdib nang sinabi niya iyon.

So they come back if I’m not there? Magkakabalikan ba silang talaga? But I heard Ace said that they were just friends.

“Ikaw na nga ang bida ngayon sa buong campus dahil nanalo ka sa walang kwentang pageant na ’yan kahit na ako dapat ang nanalo! Tapos ngayon kasalanan mo pa kung bakit ako hiniwalayan ni Ace!” Lisa screams hysterically at me.

I was stunned by her words. Tumalikod ako at kinakabahang hinarap siya.

My brows were now lifted as if they were asking her. Ako? I’m the reason why they broke up?

I sighed loudly. “What are you talking about Lisa? Bakit ako ang sinisisi mo?”  nagtatakang tanong ko sa kaniya.

Nahuli lang naman nila akong nakikinig sa kanila tapos ako na agad ang sinisisi niya kung bakit sila tuluyang nagkahiwalay? What the…

“You will pay this Blair kapag hindi kami nag kaayos ni Ace,” she remarked like she was threatening me. Then she walked out leaving me alone in the hallway.

Then the nervousness I am feeling earlier change into a rage. As if I’m scared of her. Wala naman akong kinalaman sa kanila e’.

Padabog kong binagsak ang bungkos ng bulaklak na iyon sa loob ng locker ko. Kung hindi dahil sa bulaklak na ito hindi sana ako mababagabag ng ganito at madadamay sa gulo ng iba. Ito pa naman ang pinaka iniiwasan ko dahil ayaw ko ng gulo.

“Oh, bakit ang tagal mong pumunta rito?” Maica asked me nang makarating ako ng cafeteria.

“Nagkaproblema lang sa code ng locker ko kaya natagalan ako.” mahinang ani ko kahit na hindi naman talaga iyon ang dahilan.

I ate the food she ordered for me.

“Where is Sean?” I asked her when I notice Sean is not with us.

“Nagtatampo ata kaya hindi ako sinabayan dito. I saw him walking here and I called him and invited him to join us for lunch but he declined. Maybe because of what happened this morning.”

I let a sigh. This is what I expected from him. Kapag umamin na siya sa akin at tinanggihan ko siya ay malabo ng maging magkaibigan pa kami. I wish we still can be friends. He’s a good friend of mine and I can’t lose him.

“Hey Blair, can I join you here?” 

I looked up to see if who is that. It was Johnson. He was smiling at me with the tray in his hands.

“Sigi, maluwag pa naman,” I said then give him a genuine smile.

His aura was so alluring. He looks matured than Clark. Probably because he’s a senior like Ace. He doesn’t look like he’s playing around. He seems a kind guy. His feature was soft but mixed with the light rugged.

“You’re Johnson right?” Maica suddenly spoke beside me.

Nagulat naman akong napatingin sa kaniya. She looked amused as she looks at him. Then suddenly I noticed that people here in our cafeteria were glaring at us.

“Ah-huh,”  he simply drawled.

“Oh my God! The MVP of the varsity team is here eating with us?!” she then exclaimed.

I suddenly stop eating when she said that. I didn’t know that he’s an MVP. Kaya pala halos lahat ng nandito ay nakatingin sa amin. He’s popular and that’s for sure.

“And your colt defense or arms manufacturer has grown internationally!” Maica added.

Why is this girl known so many things? Napailing iling nalang ako.

So that’s him, he’s also rich and one of the elite’s families. Hindi ko pa naririnig ang family surname niya ay nagsusumigaw na sa galaw nito ang karangyaan. That explains it.

“Hmm. Yeah.” matamang sagot nito kay Maica.

“After class niyo may gagawin ka pa ba Blair?” Johnson then asked me.

I glanced at him. I think of it before I spoke.

“Wala naman na. Uuwi na ako after school.”

Tumango tango pa siya na parang may naiisip.

“Can I invite you for coffee? Don’t worry, diyan lang sa labas ng school may cafe,” he probed.

Maica shifted at her sit. Binunggo niya pa ng bahagya ang aking siko.

“Grab it, Blair. It’s just a friendly date.” Maica murmured when she leans on me.

“Ok lang naman, basta saglit lang. Bawal kasi akong gabihin.” I replied to him politely.

“Sure, don’t worry.”

Natapos na kami mag lunch at hinatid pa kami ni Johnson sa aming classroom. It’s a bit weird because most of the girls are turning their heads on us.

After the pageant, my schoolmates were now good in me. They are always come near me and make a little chitchat. Nawala na rin ang hiya at pgkailang ko sa kanila.

“Nililigawan ka rin ba ni Johnson, Blair?” Maica suddenly asked.

“No, he’s not. Maybe he’s only that friendly to me.” I answered as I read my notes.

Maica raised her brows like she didn’t buy my statement. Nilakihan ko lang siya ng mata nang mag-angat ako sa kaniya ng tingin dahil alam kong iba na naman ang nasa isip niya.

“We are just in grade seven Blair and you look like a grade nine student. That’s why boys flock to you. You looked mature.” She uttered.

I winced. I know what she means. That boys not our age are more matured than us.

I am now waiting for Johnson here in our classroom. Sabi niya kanina ay pupuntahan niya lang raw ako rito.

Nauna na si Maica na umalis. Pumunta dito si Sean kanina but he didn’t even look at me. I felt sad about it. Hindi ko pa naman siya nakakausap simula kanina and I didn’t explain my side on him tapos hindi na niya ako pinapansin.

I sighed and looked away.

“Bye! Blair!” some of my classmates said.

“Bye!” I replied.

“Sorry natagalan ako. We’re just having a hard time on our last subject.” Johnson explained when he came up.

“Ayos lang,” tangi kong ani.

We went out of the campus and go to the near cafe. I was now sitting when he called the waiter for us.

“Tell her anything you want. It’s my treat,” he then announced.

Nahihiya naman akong bumaling sa waitress.

“Strawberry cake and white chocolate mocha. Thanks.” I looked at him.

He said his order then stare at me.

“Thanks for coming here with me,”  he said happily. His eyes were hooded when he licked his lips.

Nagbaba ang tingin ko sa lamesa bago inangat ang tingin pabalik sa kaniya.

“Ako nga dapat ang mag thank you dahil sinagot mo pa yung order ko.” I shyly said.

“No! It’s me who invited you to come over kaya sagot ko talaga dapat iyon,” he prompted assuringly.

Our order came. Johnson was kind to me. He tells me about his favorite sport which is basketball and his hobbies. He asked me things a lot. And I enjoying answered it. Overall he’s fun to be with.

We’re about to go back to our school when I saw Ace standing in front of his car, near the parking lot.

Malapit lang ang campus namin dito sa cafe at konting lakad lang ay mararating mo na.

We’re now at the gate. Nagpaalam na si Johnson na pupunta lang siya ng parking lot dahil nandoon nakapark ang kaniyang sasakyan kaya mag-isa ako ngayong naghihintay sa kaniya.

I bit my lips when I saw Ace looking at me intently.

I came near him. Wala pa yung sundo ko kaya hihintayin ko nalang muna. O kaya naman makikisabay nalang ako kay Johnson kung ayos lang sa kaniya.

I gulped when I’m now near his car.

Nilakasan ko ang loob ko para makalapit ako sa kaniya. I want to say my sorry about what happened earlier in the locker room.

“Kanina bouquet and now another man to a cafe.” his voice growled in a deep baritone voice.

I bit my lip. What is he talking about?

“I just want to apologize about what ha-”  he abruptly cutted me off.

“I don’t mind if you hear us. Just leave Johnson alone. You are a kid and it’s not good seeing you with him.” he seriously muttered to me.

My forehead creased. I’m a kid? My lips parted at that.

So that’s what he thinks of me. A child…a kid.

Kabanata 17

Kabanata 17

Blame

Part of my heart hurt about what he said. I know that I’m still a kid but it hurts when he’s the one saying it.

Yeah. I don’t know why I feel this way. Maybe it’s my ego who gets hurt. I looked up at him so much and he just said it nonchalantly.

I’m not sure about my feelings for him. I just only know that I’m not comfortable with him around. And I admit that I have a crush on him. That’s why it hurts when he thinks of me in that way.

“Let’s go home. Kanina pa kita hinahanap. Your dad called me. He said that I’ll drive you home.” he said while his eyes roaming around me.

Bigla ko namang naalala ang sinabi ni Daddy sakin na iba ang susundo sa akin ngayong araw. So it’s him? Bahagyang umawang ang aking mga labi.

“Ikaw pala yung susundo sakin?” I asked him hesitantly but also in surprise.

“Yes. Now get in the car because the sun was setting,” he said as he goes to the door of his car and opens it for me.

I went in. He closed the door and walks towards the driver’s seat. I was now sitting beside him. I put on my seatbelt when he entered the car.

“Sorry kung pinaghintay kita. I didn’t know na ikaw pala yung sinasabi ni Dad na susundo sa akin.” nahihiyang ani ko sa kaniya.

He then looked at me after he starts the engine. We’re now moving when he spoke.

“It’s alright.” he just simply drawled.

I looked at the side view mirror. I can’t pick up the topic so I just shut up.

There’s no traffic but when the traffic light becomes red we stop. It takes a minute before he drove again.

Sumusulyap sulyap ako sa kaniya kapag busy siya sa pagtingin sa kalsada. I noticed him that he’s looking at me sometimes and it makes me feel conscious and uncomfortable. I’m getting nervous when he’s around me but what more now that I’m inside his car once again? I feel stoic and I can’t move easily because of his presence.

“Are you hungry? We can stop somewhere if you want.” he suddenly spoke.

Natataranta naman akong nangapa ng sasabihin ko sa kaniya.

“Huwag na. Ah, kumain naman na ako kanina sa cafe.” I immediately responded.

He took a glance in my way. It was quick but I saw his eyes were serious. I can even see it through the mirror.

“D-Diretso nalang tayo sa bahay, maybe you have important things to do.” I then muttered softly to him.

My heart is not that pounding so loud like it was before. But it still throbbing a bit wilder. Maybe I used to him when we’re together? But how will I use to him? Maybe it was just because I’m trying to calm myself whenever I know he’s around.

“Wala naman. Pero kung ayaw mo ayos lang din naman.” he slowly said.

Parang nagtatampo ang tono ng pananalita nito pero hindi ko nalang pinansin, because that’s next to impossible.

I bit my lip. Kung wala siyang gagawin maybe I can invite him for dinner? Wait! Baka nakakahiya naman kung yayayain ko siya. At saka parang ang feeling close ko naman kung iimbitahin ko siya. Kahit na si Dad ay madalas siyang imbitahan sa hapag, nahihiya at naiilang pa rin ako.

Dad and Mom are definitely not there in home kaya mag-isa lang ako sa hapag ngayong gabihan.

I didn’t speak. We’re just silent till we reach our house. I went out of his car when he parked it in front of our garage. Sunod siyang bumaba sa akin dahil narinig ko ang pagsarado ng pintuan niya.

I turned to him. I thought he will go after he sent me home.

“Ihahatid kita sa loob,” he suddenly inserted.

Seryoso lang siyang naunang naglakad patungo sa pinto ng bahay. I even saw Manang Soling in our living room, sitting on the couch. And she stood up when she saw us. Then she approached us later on nang nasa hamba na kami ng pintuan.

“Nahuli ka na ng uwi Blair. At kanina pa tumatawag ang iyong ama kung nakauwi ka na raw ba.” nag-aalalang anito sa akin.

“Sorry, Manang. I just hang out with…uhm, ah, a friend kaya natagalan ako. I will just call Dad instead, to say that I’m home.” I said to her para naman mawala ang pag-aalala nito sa kaniyang mga mata.

“I already did. Better you tell your Dad kung aalis ka o kung mahuhuli ka ng uwi para hindi sila mag-aalala sa iyo.” Ace suddenly spoke behind me.

Napangiwi naman ako ng bahagya. Ngumuso ako. Bakit ba parang ang sungit naman niya ngayon.

I turned my head on him and I raise my brow a bit.

“Mabuti naman at nasundo ka nitong si Ace. Sa pagkakaalam ko eh may pinapagawa raw sa iyo ang iyong ama.” ani Manang Soling sa lalaking nakatayo na ngayon sa aking tabi.

“Opo. Medyo natagalan lang sa paghihintay sa kaniya.” anito at naramdaman kong balingan niya ako ng tingin, animong ako ’yung tinutukoy niya.

And I’m started to get annoyed.

“Manang pupunta lang po muna ako sa kwarto ko. I will just change my clothes.” marahang ani ko para makawala na rin sa mga seryoso niyang tingin sa akin.

“Mabuti pa nga at maghahain na rin ako para pagbaba mo rito ay handa na ang hapunan. Ikaw ba Ace? Dito ka na maghapunan para may kasabay itong si Blair sa hapagkainan.” Nakangiting anyaya nito kay Ace.

I jumped a bit. My heart start beating crazily because of Manang’s invite. And I felt my throat run dried.

Kinakabahan akong hinintay ang isasagot niya. He took a glance at me first before he spoke. His glare was intense like he was annoyed by me.

What’s wrong with him? He keeps on glaring at me like I did something wrong. Hindi ko nalang siya tiningnan at nag-iwas ako sa kaniya ng tingin.

“Sigi po.” He then answered.

Pumanhik na ako ng hagdan papunta ng aking silid. My heart continuously pounding so loud. I can even hear the loud sounds that it makes.

Dito ulit siya magdi-dinner! And thinking that idea making me so nervous. Pang ilang dinner niya na ba ito sa amin at bakit ganito pa rin ako mag react every time I know that he’s gonna be here with me at the dining.

I know that I’m still not comfortable pero sa tingin ko hindi na ’yon mawawala dahil masasanay nalang din ako sa presensya niya. I hope that that time will come.

I go downstairs after I change my dress.  He’s now comfortably sitting on his chair in the dining area nang maabutan ko siya ron. He looked at me when he saw me arrived.

Manang is now standing beside the table. I walked towards my chair and sat, in front of me was Ace. We started eating our meal when I finally get my spoon. And since that, he didn’t look back at me again.

I focused on my food as well. Dahil seryoso lang din siya sa kaniyang pagkain. And I suddenly stopped sipping on my glass when I caught him in front of me staring.

Halos muntik ko pang maibuga ang tubig na nasa bibig ko dahil sa seryoso niyang mga matang nasa akin ang titig. I slowly swallowed the water inside my mouth later on.

“Eat more. Kaya pala ang payat mo dahil ang konti ng kinakain mo,” he muttered which made me swallowed hard.

I bit my lip. I looked in my arms. Hindi naman ako sobrang payat ah? Katamtaman lang naman ang katawan ko. But he finds me skinny?

At natigilan ako sa gulat nang nilagyan nito ng kanin at gulay na ulam ang aking pinggan.

My lips parted as I looked at him in awe. I didn’t expect his sudden move that’s why I’m really shocked. I felt my cheeks flushed when I remember him doing it. It’s like a dream come true.

He’s my crush. And my crush put some food on my plate!

Hindi nalang ako nagsalita at kinain nalang ang pagkaing nilagay niya sa plato ko. Natapos kaming kumain at pinahatid sa akin ni Manang si Ace sa labas.

We’re now here walking towards his car.

I never thought that we can walk together. He’s walking seriously and his eyes were glinting by the lights from our house.

Huminto siya sa paglalakad nang marating namin ang sasakyan niya kaya natigil din ako sa paghakbang.

“Thanks for driving me home again,” I said after a minute of silence in between us.

“You’re welcome. Thanks for the dinner,”

We stared at each other for a moment when our eyes met. I saw him licked his lips before he spoke.

“Go back inside and I’ll go home,”

“Hihintayin na muna kitang makaalis.” ani ko pa.

“No, go now inside kid,” he then said mockingly.

My lips protruded. Here he goes again, calling me a kid.

“I’m not a kid. I’m now a teenager.” I told to him.

“Still a kid,” he said then smirked immaculately.

I smacked his arm. He didn’t even move a bit. His arms were like iron. Matigas ito ng tinampal ko.

“I’m not a kid Ace! Stop saying it.” I said, getting annoyed at him.

“Okay, okay just go inside now.”  Aniya na may multo ng ngiti sa kaniyang mga labi.

Tiningnan ko naman siya ng nakakainis na tingin. And he was just smirking at me teasingly.

At kalaunan ay naglakad na rin ako papasok ng bahay. I heard his car roared. I go upstairs and went to my room.

Mom and Dad called me that night. Dad asked me kung nasundo ba ako ni Ace and I said ’yes. Nalaman niya ring natagalan akong nakauwi pero hindi naman niya nabanggit ang dahilan.

Probably Ace didn’t say my reasons to Dad.

The call ended. Nagkamustahan lang kami nila Mom at nasabi nilang baka bukas ay hindi pa sila makauwi.

Then later on I finally lay down on my bed as I think of Ace. We’re getting closer I guess, or am I that assuming? He’s fond to be with even he annoyed me I still like it, anyway.

I’m happy na nakakausap ko na siya ngayon. Masungit nga lang at minsan hindi ko maintindihan pero nag-eenjoy naman ako every time I was with him.

The next day came. It was Friday morning. Weekdays were near so Mom and Dad were probably home by that.

“Come on Blair! I’m hungry! Paniguradong nando’n na rin si Ace kaya halika na.” Maica said to me as I arranged my notebook inside my bag.

Tiningnan ko siya ng nakakunot ang noo. This girl is always hungry. Even she’s really not. Ginagawa lang naman niyang rason ang gutom niya to go at the school cafeteria. And she even says Ace’s name! For what? For making me come and hurry to join her?

I’m saying this because she often talks about the guy who was her new suitor. Yes, it was a new guy again. I just noticed that she frequently has a new suitor. Parang every week ata ay iba. But then I didn’t mind her. It’s her choice kaya hindi ko na rin siya pinapakialaman.

As long as her safe and the guy never hurts her, I’m fine with it.

“Oh my god! Hi Mark!” Maica exclaimed. We’re now here in front of the cafeteria.

The guy he called approached us. He’s good-looking. Maica has always a good sense when it comes to her choice of boys.

Pinagmasdan ko lang muna sila habang nag-uusap. Para kong tanga dahil hindi man lang ako napapansin ng dalawang ’to. It seems like they having their own world as they glance and talk to each other.

Tumikhim ako para makuha man lang ng bahagya ang atensiyon nila. Kaso wala pa ring epekto.

I was about to walk away when I saw Sean. Papasok na rin siya ng cafeteria nang magtama ang aming mga tingin.

I smiled at him. Nagbabakasakaling lalalapitan niya na ako at hindi na iiwasan. Marahil nagtampo lang ito nung nakaraan pero hindi pa rin naman namin napag-uusapan kung anong dahilan ng pag-iwas nito. Or is it about his confession to me yesterday?

He smiled back. I immediately feel surprised that he’s now responding. Naglakad siya papalapit sa gawi ko.

“Sorry, Blair.” He simply said when he’s here now standing in front of me.

Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kaniya dahil sa sinabi. My forehead creased.

“Sorry saan?” nagtataka kong tanong sa kaniya.

“You know…about what happened yesterday,” he said uncomfortably.

Umiwas pa siya ng tingin sa akin. Ani mong hiyang hiya talaga siya tungkol doon. Napakurap kurap pa ako.

“I understand. I mean, we’re just friends, right? We can still be friends and still in that stage?” I asked to lighten the topic for him.

I want our friendship more than the latter one. I don’t want to take risks for ourselves especially that I do not fancy him.

He chuckled. Fakely.

“Y-Yeah. Sure.” He said, while his eyes were vapid. Trying to get life even I know that he can’t hide it from me.

“Let’s go, libre nalang kita.” pagbawi pa nito sa akin.

I smiled at him and just ignore what I saw in his hopeless eyes. Pumasok na nga kami ng cafeteria without Maica. Hindi rin niya ata kami napansin na pumasok ni Sean.

Well, She’s busy with Mark.

I’m glad that we’re back in our good state. Sean was a good friend to me at ayaw ko nang hindi niya ako pinapansin o kinakausap man lang. And I feel relief because he’s trying. He’s respecting what my decision will be.

“Sean,” I called him when he came back with the tray in his hands.

He looked at me. Inilapag niya ang tray at inilagay ang inorder niya para sakin.

“Yes?” he asked normally.

He takes his seat and sipped on his juice.

“I just want to clear things that we can just only be friends. I know what you mean about what you’ve said yesterday. I’m sorry but that’s all I can give.” I said as I looked at him straight in the eyes.

I want us to clarify things so we can get along normally without feelings involved. Except for our friendship.

I saw him looked down at what I’d said. While I look away as I think of what will I’m gonna say next. I don’t want him to treat me differently. I want him to treat me normally. Like his usual friends, cool.

“I know. Just don’t mind what I’ve said to you yesterday. And don’t worry, we are still friends.” he suddenly spoke.

I lifted my gaze at him. I felt light about what he said. It’s better that we know these things earlier and clarifies them.

I smiled at him.

“Blair,”

Someone spoke from behind me. Napalingon ako sa kaliwang bahagi ng likuran ko at nagugulat na makita si Clark.

“I bought this for you.” Aniya at naglakad siya papunta sa tapat ko.

Nakaawang naman ng bahagya ang labi ko habang pinagmamasdan ang isang box ng donut. It was bavarian when I saw him opened it for me, and it’s my favorite! How did he know?

Nilapag niya sa ibabaw ng lamesa ang dala niyang pagkain.

“Thank you for this, Clark,” I said as I looked at him wondering.

“You’re welcome. I just wanna tell you that I still want to court you if that’s okay with you. I’m willing to wait hanggang sa pumayag ka na.”

My eyes widen a bit. Napakurap kurap ako ng bahagya bago tuluyang nakapag salita.

I forgot about him asking me to court me! Hindi ko naman alam na seseryusohin niya pala talaga iyon. While here I am shocked by his words.

Kakatapos ko nga lang kausapin si Sean about us being friends and here’s him asking me for that. Clark is a notorious playboy. And I know what he’s up to.

Naging usap-usap lang naman ako nitong nakaraan dahil ako ang nanalo sa Ms. Intramurals. Nilalapitan na rin ng ibang kalalakihan, even my batchmates. And now that I’m being busy rejecting all of them. I feel bad for them but I really not into relationships.

I’m still young for it and I know to myself that I have another man in my heart. Well, definitely he’s only my crush. And I know someday it will also fade.

But I know if I like a person particularly. Hindi na ako tumitingin sa iba. Hindi ko alam kung saan ko ba nakukuha itong mga sinasabi ko but one thing is for sure, I just only like Ace.

“You know what Clark, Blair doesn’t need a suitor. At pag nalaman ’to ni Tito paniguradong mapapahamak pa siya.” Sean muttered to Clark for me.

“Why? Because you like her too? Kaya ikaw lang ang pwede? Don’t stop me, bro, I know what I’m doing.” Maangas na singhal naman ni Clark.

I gasped. Hindi ko na alam kung ano ba ang gagawin ko. They are now arguing about me. And it’s my fault. I need to stop them.

I lifted my eyes on Sean who’s now gritting his teeth. Pareho silang nakatitig sa isa’t isa nang mariin.

“A-Ano kasi, Clark hindi pa ako pwede magpaligaw,” I said to change the intense air between the two of them.

Clark shifted his gaze at me.

“Gano’n ba? But I’m still willing to wait. I hope you consider it.” He said as his former vigorous eyes were now replaced by dismay.

“Yeah, but we can be friends if you want,” I said like I was offering him to be my friend instead of him being my suitor.

Gusto ko naman na hindi makasakit ng damdamin ng iba kaya yun lang ang nakikita kong magandang paraan. And being my friend was a great offer instead of being his girlfriend.

He smiled. His eyes glint joy now as he stared at me.

“Kung ayos lang sa iyo?”

“Syempre naman. It’s okay with me.” I said lightly on him.

Natigil lang kami sa pag-uusap nang biglang tumikhim si Sean sa aking harapan. I bit my lip as I turn my head to his way.

“I deal with it. As long as you keep your distance to her.” He said directly to him as his eyes darted to Clark.

Sean was really a good friend. He’s like my older brother. He always protects me. Kahit na dati ay isa siya sa mga naiinis sa akin.

“I know my role as her friend. No need for your words.” Clark cooly said.

Nagpaalam na rin si Clark kalaunan na lumipat ng kabilang lamesa kung nasaan ang kaniyang mga barkada. Kinawayan pa ako ng mga kaibigan niya bago siya tuluyang maupo ron.

Bumaling na ang atensiyon ko kay Maica na kadarating lang galing sa labas, mag-isa, hindi na kasama ang lalaki niya ngayon. I looked at her and I was surprised when I noticed her irritated face.

Mukha siyang pinagsukluban ng langit at lupa dahil sa ekspresyon nito. She looks sad but at the same time, she looks annoyed.

Pabagsak niyang inilapag ang handbag nito sa lamesa. She takes her seat and looked at me. Bahagya naman akong kinabahan ng tiningnan niya ako ng matalim.

So I turn my gaze to Sean who’s beside her. He just shrugged. I gulped as I look at her too.

“Kahit kelan talaga ’yang Elena na ’yan, ubod ng sama ang pag-uugali! She’s a freaking slut!” Nanggagalaiting anito.

I frowned, critically thinking her statement.

“Why? What happened?” nagtataka kong tanong sa kaniya dahil hindi ko naman maintindihan kung ano bang pinagsasasabi niya.

I know that Elena is not kind. But she’s now telling me that Elena is a freaking slut?

I looked at Sean. He was just silently glaring at Maica. Seroyoso lang siyang nakikinig sa mga sinasabi nito.

“Inagaw niya sakin si Mark! And for goodness sake. Mark was a big catch! Pero ano namang mapapala ko ron kung sulutera naman ang nang-agaw. Elena is a slut. I know what she wants from boys. Kaya hindi na ako magtataka kung maluwang na siya.”

My forehead creased. Maluwang? What was she meant by that?

“Maica. Your language!” Sean suddenly spoke.

But Maica just leered at him.

“Kaya nga nung sa pageant naging wild ang mga boys dahil tuwang tuwa sa pinapakita niya. That’s why I was not surprised that she won the best in sportswear.”

Nagtataka naman akong napatingin sa kaniya.

“What do you mean?” I asked her curiously.

“Oh! Hindi mo ba nakita yung suot niya?” Tanong nito pabalik sa akin.

Umiling iling naman ako bilang tugon.

“Maybe you’re busy changing your gown that time, kasi nauna ka sa kaniyang mag ramp. Well, let me just tell you the story. She’s just only wearing her car racing outfit and in a surprise, she unzipped her upper cover up revealing her tube top!”

My eyes widen at that.

“Of course, the boys became wild. They saw a big in front so they drool and get berks. Because her cleavage was more than noticeable.” 

Yun siguro yung time na nakisilip ang ibang mga kandidata sa labas kung bakit naghiyawan ng ganoon kalakas ang mga tao. I just ignore it and I didn’t know that it was Elena and her show.

“At alam mo ba, sabisabi na ginawa niya daw ’yon for Ace! She wants him to notice her that way. How desperate slut she is.” She said disgustingly.

I looked away. Maybe Ace would like her. She looked mature too, like Lisa her ex-girlfriend.

“You know what? Maybe you’re the reason kaya kami nag break ni Ace. Because you’re a slut! You freaking showed him your cleavage! You want others drooling over you!”

Napabaling ang tingin namin sa biglang sumigaw. And when I saw it was Lisa with her friends. And Elena in front of her with her gang. The students inside watched them and became attentive by the sudden commotion they are making.

“There it is. Sino ba naman ang hindi magagalit sa isang katulad niyang higad.” mahinang bulong sa akin ni Maica.

Sean was behind us. We’re now looking at them. The students turned their heads at them too. It seems like there will be a catfight.

“Ano bang sinasabi mo? Huwag ka ngang feelingera Lisa. You were just his friend so don’t act as if you’re the girlfriend.” Elena hissed at her.

“You planned all of this. Kaya siguro kami nagkakaganito. He doesn’t pay attention to me anymore!” Lisa exclaimed hysterically.

Nakatingin na halos lahat ng estudyante ngayon sa loob ng cafeteria sa kanila. They open their phones and take some photos, some are taking videos.

“As if he does it before? Maybe you’re just his pastime.” Elena fired back like she wants more to irritate Lisa.

“Kung past time ako, ano ka pa? Huh. You’re just his stuff toy. Itatapon ka rin niya kapag luma na.” Seryosong ani ni Lisa kay Elena.

“I don’t care! At saka, bakit ba ako ang sinisisi mo? Why don’t you blame Blair? Hindi ba siya itong madalas na nakakasama si Ace?” ngingisi ngisi pang aniya.

I almost jumped at my sit. When they turned their glares on me now. Some of the cameras are now focusing on me.

Kinakabahan akong bumaling sa kanila. Tumingin naman sa akin ng masama si Lisa.

“I saw her so many times with Ace. Siguro hinahatid siya ni Ace sa kanila.” sulsol pa ni Elena rito.

I swallowed hard. I didn’t expect this will happen. Silang dalawa kanina ang nagbabangayan tapos ngayon ay masasali ako?

Panong nangyaring nakita ni Elena na sinundo ako ni, Ace? And to be real, hinatid ngang talaga niya ako sa amin. And it was just only my Dad’s favor to him. No malice at all.

Kaya bakit ako ginagawan ng ganitong issue ni Elena? Just to save herself? How evil she is!

She’s using me to turns the blame on me instead of her.

I then sighed heavily. What’s happening right now was really unbelievable. I wish this wouldn’t change the people around me who are now treating me better. I do not want to repeat the past without anyone talking to me anymore just because of this issue that Elena is insinuating.

Kabanata 18

Kabanata 18

Promised

They are all staring at me.

Ang kaninang na kina Elena at Lisa ang mga atensiyon nila, ngayon ay nasa akin na. I nervously roamed my gazes on them all who’s now seemingly glaring at me.

“Ano nanaman ’tong sinasabi ni Elena? Mapupuruhan na talaga siya sa akin.” Maica irritatedly uttered beside me.

I swallowed hard then lifted my gaze at her. Sean was also there for me. Lumipat siya ng pwesto patungo sa likuran ko.

I then heard some of the student’s gossips.

“Kaya pala nando’n ka at nakikinig sa usapan namin ni Ace? Because you are probably celebrating that time that we’re now detached!” Lisa hysterically shouted at me.

“Akala mo kung sino ng diyosa nanalo lang naman sa pageant. And for your information dapat ako talaga yung nanalo inakit mo lang naman yung lalaking judge!” Elena seconded to her.

I gasped and my mouth left in dropped dramatically. What are they up to? My eyes literally widened as I watched them contemning me in front of everyone.

Mabilis at malakas ang kalabog ng aking dibdib dahil sa kanilang mga pinaparatang sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang gagawin ko. Ang kaninang maayos at magandang umaga ay ngayon napapalitan na ng takot at pangamba.

Why they are complaining me those things? And all their accusations weren’t reasonable. I swallowed hard as I tighten the grip of my both holding hands. Trembling in so much confusion and nervousness.

“Hoy ikaw Elena! Your mouth is really trash! Puro garbage lang ang inilalabas niyan. And don’t you dare turn the blame on Blair! How dare you say that!” Maica yelled at them back. She’s protecting me against the two who insulting me now.

“Huwag ka ngang makisali!” it was Lisa who snorted at her.

Akmang lalapit na si Lisa sa akin para haltakin ang buhok ko nang humarang si Sean sa aking harapan. Hindi siya nagpaawat at pilit talaga na lumalapit sa akin.

I step back as I held onto our table.

“Ako? Are you out of your mind, girl? Ako lang naman ang kaibigan nitong pinagtutulungan niyo ngayon. And don’t mess with us, kayo ’yung nag-aaway riyan kanina tapos dinadamay niyo siya.. Don’t me, girl… Don’t me.” Maarte pero bakas pa rin sa boses ni Maica ang inis at galit nito lalo na kay Elena.

I bit my lip as I think of this all. I can’t help but stare at them and shut my mouth in frighten.

Napaatras pa ako ng bahagya dahil sa takot kong baka masaktan ako ni Lisa. Nahihiya at natatakot akong magsalita. I can’t even save myself.

I’m thankful that Maica was here to save my ass. But it shouldn’t be this way. She shouldn’t be getting involved with this trouble. And I promise and taught myself to be not afraid. I should have saved myself because I am the oppressed here.

“Huh! Kinakampihan mo pa ’yang malandi mong kaibigan. Pareho lang kayo!” Elena exclaimed.

Hindi ko alam kung saan nanggagaling ang mga pinagsasasabi nitong si Elena. I felt something strange inside me. A wave of burning anger towards them.

Kanina pa ako nagtitimpi at naiinis na ako. I don’t want to hit on her because I don’t want trouble. But she is the one who starts the scandal. She’s the one bringing me the commotion I never wanted to be involved in.

“Ang kapal rin naman ng muk-” I cut her off, it was Maica

“Don’t you ever say it to me again. Wala akong ginagawang ganiyan, alinman sa mga pinaparatang mo sa akin Elena. And how scandalous you are to make a scene here?” I fired at her, voice not in raise but enough for them to hear me out.

I’m so full of anger that I need to burst it out loud. Lahat ng tao sa loob ng cafeteria ay saglit na natahimik.

They even turned off their phones. They looked shocked at what I’ve said. Marahil siguro ito ang unang beses na sumagot ako kay Elena.

Before, I just only ignoring her. Hinahayaan ko lang ang lahat ng pamamahiya niya sa akin. But now I can’t hold it all. I wanna spill it all out.

Elena’s face was stunned by my words.

“And you Lisa. How many times do I have to explain it to you? That I was there for my locker and that I just accidentally heard you. It’s not my problem anymore if you couldn’t believe me.” I said as I looked at them straight in the eyes.

Matalim pa rin ang mga matang nakatingin sa akin si Lisa. Her lips were in a grim line like she was really that furious.

Tumigil na rin siya sa pagpupumiglas mula sa hawak ni Sean at lumayo na sa amin.

My lips trembled as I spoke. My hands were shaking in a fist of stone. Inalis ko ang tingin ko sa kanila at bumaling kay Maica.

She gets what I meant when I looked at her. Umalis na kami kasama si Sean sa likuran namin. Hindi na inalintana ang mga matang nakamasid.

“Elena. Sumusobra ka na! You’re so bully! Marami ka ng nasasaktan.”

I heard Clark saying it to her and the other students agreed with him as we walked out of the exit. Nakalabas na kami ng cafeteria nila Maica.

“Are you okay Blair?” I suddenly lifted my gaze at him.

“I’m fine, Clark.” ani ko kahit nagugulat mang makita siyang sumunod pala siya sa amin.

Hindi ko namalayang nakasunod pala ito hanggang dito sa isang bench malapit sa mga puno hanggang sa makaupo kami.

“Iwasan mo nalang sila Elena, Blair hanggang maaari. Wala siyang maidudulot na maganda sa atin. And you Maica, do the same. Huwag mo ng patulan.” Sean spoke.

Tiningnan ko lang sila ng may lungkot sa mga mata. Maica seems irritated about what happened. I know that this is all happened because of me. And now they are getting involved which I don’t want to happen.

“I’m sorry. Hindi ko sinasadyang madamay ka pa sa gulo ko Maica.” I sincerely apologize at her.

“No Blair. It’s their fault. Nananahimik tayo tapos biglang ikaw yung aawayin nila? They’re crazy.”  Naiiling na ani pa ni Maica.

I just bowed my head out of shame. I do not know what to say to them. I know I’m not at fault but I don’t want to implicate them. I feel like I’m the one to blame.

“Come on Blair, vacant niyo naman sa next subject right? Sumama nalang kayo sa amin sa gymnasium. We have our basketball practice.” anyaya ni Clark sa amin kalaunan.

“That’s a great idea. Tara na Blair. Don’t mind it, huwag ka ng malungkot.” Sean muttered to me.

Pumunta kami ng gymnasium. The players were already there. Sean and Clark were now in their locker room to get their things and to change their clothes. Nakaupo kami ngayon ni Maica sa isa sa mga bleachers dito sa bandang ibaba.

The boys were now doing their warm-up. Inalis ko na rin sa isipan ko ang tungkol sa nangyari kanina. It’s not healthy for me to think those things.

At kung tungkol naman kay Ace, hindi ko alam kung siya ba ang dapat kong sisihin kung bakit ako ngayon pinagtutulungan ng dalawang iyon. He’s just doing my Dad’s favor and I know that there is nothing wrong with that.

Mga taong makikitid lang talaga ang mga utak ang gumagawa ng mga gano’ng issue. And Lisa who’s blaming me about their break up is absolutely insane. I don’t know if it’s just because she’s really that broken-hearted or she’s just only finding a reason kung bakit sila naghiwalay, para yun ang buntunan niya ng galit.

Nahihirapan na akong intindihin ang mga ’yon. I’m trying my best to understand all of it. But now it’s all happening.

“Blair! Kanina pa sayo tingin ng tingin si Johnson.” Maica called me as my mind go back to where I am right now, out of my reverie.

I looked at the players and saw Johnson there. Bahagyang pawisan ang maputi nitong braso. He then smiled and wave his hand at me when he caught me looking on his way.

I smiled and waved back to him as my response. Sean and Clark were now also down there. Hindi nila napansin si Johnson na nakabaling sa akin.

“Ano nga pala ang nangyari sa inyo nung in-invite ka niya for coffee?” Maica then asked me curiously.

Napabaling naman ako sa katabi ko na ngayon ay kuryosong nakatingin sa akin.

Bahagya pang sinasagi ni Maica ang braso ko habang ang dalawang kilay ay tumataas baba pa.

“Nag-usap lang kami about different kinds of stuff. At…” I paused as I remember what happened next.

“And… What?” Maica maliciously asked.

“Nakita ko si Ace.” I bit my lower lip after I said it.

Namilog naman ng bahagya ang kaniyang mga mata. Her lips were now tugging up, forming into a smirk.

“So ’yon pala yung sinasabi ni Elena kanina.” Makahulugang aniya.

I know what she wants me to say. That Ace is sending me home.

“Wala kasi si Mom at Dad ngayon sa bahay. They are now on their convention. At wala yung isa naming driver dahil umuwi raw sa kanila.”

“Hmm, so bakit nga nando’n si Ace?”  Nanliliit ang mga mata nitong tanong sa akin.

“To just pick me up. Inihatid niya ako sa amin. And that was only my Dad’s favor to him. Sinusunod niya lang.” Pagtatapos ko sa usapan dahil mukhang marami pa siyang gustong itanong at wala naman na akong dapat na sabihin pa.

Dad’s favor to Ace was questionable. It makes me think kung bakit nauutusan ni Dad itong si Ace.

Ace was the only child of one of the elite families here in Asia at malapit na ring maging isa sa buong mundo. Kaya nakakapagtaka na si dad na isang empleyado lang naman nila e’ nagagawang utusan si Ace.

I’m not pertaining to my Dad’s position in their company. Actually, Dad was one of the stockholders and has investments with them. But, fortunately, my father is so loyal to his job that he still wants to make an architectural design for the Ventura holdings.

And Ace was cool with it. He’s not even complaining about what my father is giving on him as an order. I’m really confused about their relationship.

“Baka naman apprentice ng Daddy mo?” Maica suddenly uttered.

I looked at her. Her eyes are focused on the basketball players who are now starting to play. My forehead creased. What is she talking about?

Hindi naman ako nito binalingan ng tingin kaya bumalik nalang uli ako sa iniisip ko. Hindi ko parin maintindihan pero sa tingin ko naman ay wala lang itong iniisip ko. Masyado silang malayo kumpara sa amin. They achieved more than what we have right now.

Natapos ang buong maghapon. Hindi ko na rin nakita pa sila Lisa at Elena. Hindi rin naman nag-iba ang pakikitungo sa akin ng iba kong schoolmates. I’m glad that I’m still fine with them.

Kasabay kong maglakad si Sean at Maica ngayon patungo sa parking lot ng school.

“He,y Blair!” Someone shouted.

I turn around and saw Clark and Johnson from behind. I plaster a small smile when they approached us.

I heard Sean cleared his throat on my side.

“Uuwi ka na ba Blair? Maybe you wanna join us, diyan lang uli sa cafe na pinuntahan natin kahapon.” Johnson kindly invites me for the second time again.

“Please Blair, come and join us. Buti pa ’tong si Johnson nakasama mo ng magpunta ng cafe.” Nakasimangot na ani Clark sa akin.

Tumingin naman ako kina Maica at Sean.

“Well, it’s Friday. Maybe we can join them.” Masayang ani Maica na nasa akin ang tingin.

“Sasama rin ako.” Sean suddenly spoke.

Napamaang naman ako nang marinig na sasama sila. I don’t have any choice but to go along so I just nodded my head as I agree with them.

“Okay! Treat ko si Blair.” Nakangiting sabi ni Clark sa akin.

“Hindi na, ako nalang magbabayad ng o-order-in ko. Nakakahiya.” Singit ko sa kaniya.

“No. It’s a friendly date for me kaya ako ang magbabayad ng sa iyo.” He insisted.

“New friend? Bago ka pala naming friend? Bakit hindi ako na-orient? At saka bakit siya lang ililibre mo? Make it two! Isama mo na rin ako.” Maica winned at Clark.

Nakita ko namang bahagyang napamaang si Clark pero agad rin namang ngumiti at tumango nalang bilang tugon rito.

Nakarating na kami sa cafe. May iilan din kaming schoolmates na nandito ngayon. Marahil ay weekend na kaya nandito sila ngayon.

At isa pa, this cafe is great. It’s a nice place for the senior students who make their meetings about their thesis and school projects, term papers, and research.

The cafe has a nice ambiance. It has a rustic interior that makes the ambiance more relaxing. Their inside has a lot of natural elements, including plants in pots, plants on the walls, and flowers. The mix of wood types, including reclaimed wood are all set as the finish decoration of their cafe. There has also jars or vintage milk crates on the corner. That emphasis on rugged beauty.

Ngayon ko lang napagtuunan ng pansin ang lugar. Dahil kasama ko sila ngayon at may kaniya kaniya silang pinag-uusapan.

Clark and Sean take our orders on the counter. Mas gusto raw nilang sila nalang ang magdala rito sa table namin.

Napakurap kurap naman ako nang mapabaling ang tingin ko sa kabilang table. My eyes were a bit stunned when I saw Ace there staring at me intently.

He’s with his friends. The two boys as usual. Jayden and Alex beside him and he’s in the middle among the three.

Some of the customers are looking at them. Even our schoolmates are talking about them. They look out of place here. Kahit na suot nila ang uniporme nila ay nagmumukha silang mga sikat.

The cafe was great but it looks cheap pag nakita mo silang tatlo na nag-uusap lang dito sa loob.

I swallowed hard. Ace was staring at me as he talked to Alex. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ba ako nito tinitingnan. Naiilang man ako ron ay nagagawa ko parin siyang tignan pabalik.

But I immediately looked away when Sean and Clark arrived.

“Nandito pala sila Ace!” mahina pero matinis na ani Maica sa kabilang gilid ko.

Napabaling naman ng tingin ang mga kasamahan ko sa banda nila. Nasa bandang gilid lang kasi namin sila Ace na katapat ng puwesto namin.

I looked at my coffee that Clark gave me.

Naalala ko bigla kung bakit kaya sya nandito. Hindi kaya siya ulit ang susundo sa akin? Dad didn’t tell me na siya ulit ang maghahatid sa akin pauwi ngayon. I thought I will be having a new driver for this day.

I sighed as I think of it. I feel stressed about it. What if someone caught us again and make it an issue. It can be fuel in Lisa’s anger towards me.

Well, if it’s just someone will do it. But I’m too scared to be with him right now. I don’t want to be tangled with him. I don’t wanna be in trouble and get involved with the school issues that Elena is putting on me.

Natapos kami nang hindi ko man lang nagagalaw ang inorder ko.

Maica and Sean were busy talking with Clark and Johnson. Minsan ay sinasali rin nila ako sa usapan pero mas pinipili kong manahimik. Nakita kong nauna ng umalis sila Ace kasama ang dalawang kaibigan niya. We also left after them. We went to the parking area of the school.

“Blair, kanina ka pa tahimik. What’s bothering you?” Maica asked me curiously nang marating na namin ang parking lot.

I looked at her. Nangangapa pa ako ng salita nang hindi pa nagsi-sink in sa akin ang sinabi nito.

“Uhm, wala naman. My driver wasn’t here pa kaya I’m worried.” I then make an alibi.

“Gusto mo ba, sumabay ka nalang sa amin?” Sean suddenly asked me.

I shifted my gaze at him.

“Kung gusto mo sa akin nalang Blair.” Prisinta pa ni Clark.

“Anong sa’yo? Sa amin siya sasabay.” Giit pang muli ni Sean kay Clark.

Mas lalo tuloy sumasakit ang aking ulo dahil sa dalawang ito.

“Hindi na, salamat Sean. Thanks, Clark, I’ll just wait for my driver nalang.” I said weakly.

“Let’s go, Blair. We need to go home. Your Dad and Mom are coming home tonight.” I heard his familiar low baritone voice from behind me.

Clark, Sean, and Maica except for Johnson immediately turn their glares at the man behind me.

I gulped. My heart began to pound so loud.

“Si Blair ba? Kami na ang maghahatid sa kaniya.” Clark said.

Narinig ko namang hindi sumagot si Ace. Nakatingin lang sa akin si Maica habang ngumingisi ngisi ito.

I nervously standing there still not turning to face him.

“Blair.” Ace said strictly nang hindi ko pa siya hinaharap.

Kumabog naman ng malakas ang dibdib ko nang marinig ko siyang banggitin ang aking pangalan.

I hurriedly turned to his way.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit ganito nalang ang kabang nararamdaman ko ng tawagin niya ako. My mouth parted as I tried to speak for word but nothing came out.

“A-Ahh, hindi na, sasabay nalang ako sa kanila,” I said as I stuttered.

“You said that you’ll wait for your driver here? At saka mukhang andyan na yung sundo mo. Sumabay ka na sa kaniya.” Maica said playfully.

This girl!

“Sabi mo kanina pwede niyo naman akong ihatid ah?” Agad ko namang sagot sa kaniya.

“Huh? Wala akong maalalang sinabing gano’n Blair.” Maang maangan pang anito.

I bit my lower lip as I shook my head. I frowned.

“I can drive you home if you want,” Clark spoke.

“Huwag na Clark si Ace na. Siya naman talaga yung sundo ni Blair.” Maica retorted.

I saw Clark’s brows knit. He looks confused by what Maica is saying. Nakita ko namang seryosong nakatingin si Ace kay Clark.

“Ace,” Johnson called him like it was a greet. Sean seconded. Clark was still there waiting for my response by his offer.

Nagtanguan lang sila Sean, Johnson at Ace. Johnson is a senior student kaya siguro magkakilala na sila.

“S-Sigi. Kay Ace na ako sasabay.”

I saw how Maica make face after I say it.

“Sigi. Ingat ah! Una na kami.” Maica said then hugged me for seconds. She leaned on beside my ear and whisper.

“Don’t be nervous Blair. Masyado kang halata na kabado kapag nandiyan siya.” She mumbled on my ears.

Umlis na sila Maica at Sean patungo sa sasakyan nila. Clark and Johnson were still there.

“Let’s go. Baka mag-alala na naman sa iyo si Manang.” Ace abruptly said.

“Alis na rin kami. Ingat kayo sa pag-uwe.” ani ko ng hinarap ko si Clark at Johnson bilang paalam.

Clark’s eyes were darted on Ace. Like he was reading Ace’s mind. Nanliit naman ang mga mata kong tumingin sa kaniya.

“Sigi. Take care also.” Johnson replied.

Narinig kong binuksan na ni Ace ang pintuan ng kaniyang sasakyan.

Nagmadali naman akong naglakad papalapit roon.

Hindi ko man lang napansin itong sasakyan niyang iyon na nakaparking dito sa tapat namin kanina, habang pabalik kami rito.

I went inside and he closed the door. Sumunod narin siyang pumasok. Nakita kong umalis na rin sila Clark at Johnson patungo sa sarili nitong mga sasakyan.

“Put your seatbelt.” mahinang aniya sa akin.

I forgot to wear my seatbelt when I come in. I hurriedly obey what he said.

At nung sinubukan ko ng ikabit ay hindi ko maipasok. Pilit kong isinusuot ito pero nahihirapan talaga ako. Last time I remember it was easy to lock. Pero ngayon ay mukhang nahihirapan ako.

I was shocked when I felt his arms beside my waist. His face is just now inches away from me. I can even smell his manly perfume filled my scents.

Umalis na rin siya at umayos na rin ng upo nang makabit niya na ang seatbelt ko.

“Thank you.” Nahihiyang ani ko, pigil ang hininga dahil sa kaninang paglapit niya sa akin.

My heart is now beating so tough and fast as I looked at him. Iniwas ko ang tingin ko sa kaniya at bumaling nalang sa labas kalaunan.

Pinaandar na niya ang sasakyan habang ang mga mata ko ay nasa labas pa rin ang mga tingin.

“You’re now having a circle of friends, huh?” He spoke in the middle of silence.

Napakurapkurap naman ako at bahagyang nanlaki ang mga mata na mapansing sumulyap siya sa akin.

“Ahh, hindi naman. Kakakilala ko pa lang kila Clark at Johnson. They are kind to me, so we get along.”

“Kakakilala lang pero nag cafe na kayo agad kahapon?” he said while his eyes are still on the road.

My forehead creased. Who is he pertaining to?

I bit my lip and didn’t speak.

Tumikhim naman siya ng maramdaman ang katahimikan muli sa pagitan namin. Nahihirapan akong kumilos at magsalita ng maayos dahil nandyan siya.

It feels awkward every time that I saw him in my peripheral vision that took a glimpse of me.

“I’m sorry.” He then uttered out of nowhere.

Napakunot noo naman ako sa sinabi niya. Why is he saying sorry?

I looked at him curiously. Diretso pa rin ang mga mata niyang nakatingin sa daanan.

“You’re not involved with us. It’s Lisa’s problem. Pasensya na kung ginugulo ka nila.” Ace suddenly spoke.

I bowed my head when I remember what happened earlier. Lisa was hysterically screaming at me. Blaming me for their broke up.

Hindi ko alam kung mganda pa ba itong ideya na itong paghatid niya sa akin. I’m happy that he drives me home. Pero kung ganito naman yung magiging resulta ng paghatid niya. Better him to stop it.

Pwede naman niyang tanggihan si Dad kung sakaling utusan siya ulit nito. O ako nalang ang magsasabi kay Dad na huwag na niya akong ipahatid kay Ace.

I was thinking when I felt the car parked. Hindi ko namalayan na nasa bahay na pala kami. Binuksan ng isang guard ang gate para makapasok na kami ng tuluyan.

Nang mai-park na ni Ace ang sasakyan niya ay bumaling muna ako sa gawi niya.

“Mabuti siguro kung kausapin mo muna si Lisa tungkol sa break up niyo. Mukha kasing hindi pa siya nakakalimot at nasasaktan pa rin siya sa naging desisyon mo.” I said to him.

I looked at him straight in his eyes as I said that. He just glared at me seriously.

He didn’t speak. He just only stared at me. I was waiting for him to say anything but nothing came so I utter again.

“Maybe it’s better kung hindi nalang din ako sasabay sa iyo sa pag-uwi.” Naglilikot na ang mga mata ko ngayon nang sabihin ko iyon sa kaniya.

He didn’t move a bit. Wala man lang nagbago sa reaksyon niya o puwesto niya simula kanina. Kaya naman ay naiilang na inalis ko nalang ang seat belt ko para makaiwas sa kaniyang mga tingin.

I can’t take it, his grey eyes were in deep that I can’t seem to look at for long.

Binuksan ko na ang pintuan ko at aamba na sa pagbaba when he suddenly spoke.

“Ihahatid pa rin kita,” he muttered deeply.

Napahinto naman ako sa pagbaba at saka bumaling sa kaniya.

“Pero ayaw ko ng issue at gulo, Ace. Pinagtutulungan na ako nila Elena at ginagawang dahilan itong paghatid mo sa akin.” 

“Hindi na nila gagawin ’yon. I promised.” he then seriously said. His eyes looked weary as he looked at me.

Tumalikod na ako at umalis na. Alam kong bastos ang ginawa kong pagtalikod pero ’yon lang ang alam kong gawin sa ngayon.

To walked away because I can’t keep his words. I don’t know where to stand right now. To be with him or to get away from him.

It’s his personal issue at nadadamay ako sa kanila. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero isa lang naman akong bata para sa kaniya. And her girls became crazy for him.

Pumasok na ako ng bahay. Hindi na rin naman siya sumunod sa akin para magpakita kay manang.

“Nandiyan ka na pala. Nasaan si Ace? Siya ba ulit ang naghatid sa iyo?” Manang Soling asked me.

I looked at her and smile weakly.

“Opo, Manang.”

“Bakit hindi mo inanyayahang pumasok man lang at dito na rin kumain ng gabihan? Parating na rin ang iyong ama at ina mayamaya kaya sana ay inimbitahan mo.” 

“Umalis na po siya Manang, baka po may importante pang gagawin.” palusot ko dahil wala rin naman sa isip kong anyayahan siyang dito ulit mag-dinner.

I was preoccupied with what he said. Hindi na daw gagawin iyon nila Elena. I don’t know if what he meant by that. Pero ang pakiramdam ko ay totoo ang sinabi niya.

His words were like a shield in my life. Like he will protect me from any pain. He’s serious when he said it. And I hold on to that. I believe that tomorrow there will be no commotion again between me, Lisa, and Elena.

Kabanata 19

Kabanata 19

Attention

The days had passed at hindi na naman nanggulo pa sila Elena. I also rarely see Lisa.

Nakauwi narin sila Mom and Dad that night. Kinabukasan non ay may driver na ngang naka assign sa akin sa paghatid at pagsundo sa school. Hindi ko na rin nakikita si Ace. After that day, hindi ko na muli siyang nakausap. Hindi narin kami masyadong nagkakakita sa cafeteria maybe it’s their last term kaya busy na ang mga seniors.

Sean and Maica was always with me. Johnson and Clark became my friends as well. That year passed and I was in my grade eight in high school.

Ace was in his grade twelve on senior high. Hindi na rin naman ako madyadong tinutukso o tinatanong ni Maica tungkol sa kaniya.

Madalas namin siyang makita nung mga first grading and second grading. Lagi niyang kasama si Angela kapag nasa cafeteria siya.

“Bakit laging umaaligid aligid kay Ace itong si Angela?” Maica asked me.

Nandito kami ngayon sa cafeteria with Sean, Clark, and Johnson.

Maica whispered it to me kaya hindi narinig ng mga kasama namin.

I just shrugged my shoulder. I looked at their way. I saw Angela talking to Ace. And Ace was just listening to her. Kasama nila sa table yung dalawang kaibigan ni Ace. Para bang sanay na sila sa presensya ni Angela na kasama siya sa grupo.

I looked away when I noticed Ace glaring at me.

This year we have a pageant again for Ms. And Mr. Intramurals. And my classmates supported me again. Luckily, I was the winner for the second time. And for the third and the fourth time. I win for four consecutive times in the pageant as the Ms. Intramurals.

Lagi ako ang pinapambato nila sa contest na ito kahit na sinabi ko ay iba na lang, but my classmates and advisers are supporting me because it has a counted grade. At sinuportahan din naman ako ni Mommy dito.

Elena is still not good to me. Hindi na niya ako nilalapitan pero lagi namang masama ang tingin nito sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung bakit gano’n pero masaya ako na hindi na niya ako ginugulo pa.

Like was before. They bullied me and one day they’d stopped doing it.

Pero ang kaibahan lang ngayon ay yung hindi na sila ilag at umiiwas sa akin. Marami na rin ang sumubok na manligaw pero wala naman ako ni isang pinagbigyan. Bukod pa sa wala akong interes sa ganoon e’ lagi akong may bantay na mga kaibigan.

Sean and Clark were too oblivious by what they are doing. They always scared my suitors. Minsan nga pinagkamalan pa na isa sa kanila ay boyfriend ko kaya umaayaw nalang ang iba.

Maica has now her boyfriend. Tumigil na rin siya sa paiba iba ng manliligaw at nakontento na sa isa.

We’re now in grade eleven. Kaklase ko pa rin si Maica hanggang ngayon. Same strand and track lang naman kami ng kinuha at same field ang gusto namin which is to be an architect someday.

Hindi ko rin alam na gusto rin pala ni Maica ’yon. Kaya parehas lang kaming nagulat ng napagkuwentuhan na namin ito.

“Blair, malapit na naman ang intrams. Sasali ka ba ulit?” Maica asked me.

Nandito kami ngayon sa school library at tahimik na nagbabasa nang biglang magtanong itong si Mica sa akin.

I looked at her way.

“Yes. Ako nanaman yung pinili nila to represent our track.” I whispered languidly.

“Uhmm. Wala ka bang balak na hindi sumali? You know? Since junior high ikaw na palagi ang nananalo, why don’t you give them a chance?”

Napaisip-isip naman ako sa sinabi niya.

Well, I can give them a fair chance if they’ll win over me. I mean, kahit naman umayaw ako ay ako pa rin ang pipilitin nilang sumali. Isa pa ay si Mom. She’s always forcing me to join.

“Ewan,” I said then shrugged. Dahil kahit gustuhin ko man ay nauuwing ako pa rin ang pinapambato ng batch namin.

I bit my lip as I read my book. My gaze lifted when someone came. It was Ace.

My eyes were now panicking. I don’t know where to look. So I just bent down and pretended that I’m reading.

“Blair, si Ace. Grabe, mas lalo siyang gumwapo! For sure pinagkakaguluhan na siya ngayon ng mga college girls.” Nakakagat labing ani ni Maica sa akin.

I didn’t bother to look at him. I also just ignore Maica. She’s telling what is obvious so I don’t mind.

Ace is now in his third year in college. I heard that he’s taking civil engineering and when he graduated he’ll take business management.

That was what I heard, probably because of their company.

Ace is really popular since then. Kaya hindi na ako nahihirapan pang makarinig ng usap usapan tungkol sa kaniya.

He was known as a serious and intelligent man. There’s a lot of women have also been involved with him lately.

And his women are not only simple but also have something to say in life. Most of them are the children of famous families from big companies. And I just noticed his patterns of his women. They are all have the same denominator. Same curved and mound chest. That’s all his type.

Napatingin naman ako sa katawan ko.

My body matured now. I have now curves and my boobs were fine. It’s not that big but it’s enough to say that I have. And my height changed. I am taller than before.

Kaso kung gaano kataas ang tinangkad ko ay ganoon rin ang tinangkad ni Ace.

He’s now taller than he’s usual before. His looks became darker now. It became matured, manly in short. And his body is now well toned. That’s what I like about him before. His complexion.

Nakaupo siya ngayon malapit sa amin. Hindi naman ako nagpahalatang tinitingnan siya.

I remember our last time conversation. It’s in his car. His promises are real I guess.

Kasi pagkatapos no’n ay hindi naman na ako ginulo pa nila Elena at Lisa.

Hindi naman ’yon ang naging huling pag-uusap namin pero ’yon ang pinaka masasabi kong matinong naging usapan namin.

Every summer, our family took a vacation in different countries but we only stays there for a month. Bumabalik rin kami rito sa Pilipinas at dito nalang ipagpapatuloy ang isang buwang bakasyon.

And the whole month na nandito kami bago ang pasukan. Ace was always in our house. He frequently comes to my father for some things.

I think it’s about his designs and works that need my father’s approval. Minsan nga kaming nagkasalubong isang umaga at bumati lang siya.

“Good morning.” He said and his face softens when it turns to me.

I plaster a small smile before I spoke. “Morning,”

That was one of our encounters every time he came into our house. Until it became our usual greetings to each other.

Madalas lang rin akong nasa kwarto ko kapag alam kong nandyan siya kaya minsan hindi rin kami nagkakasalamuha.

I know that we’re not that close when I was on my grade seven. He just picked me up and we have some conversation which is I think became often that time.

But now, we rarely talked to each other. I have a crush on him before and up until now, nothing has changed.

Parang mas lalo ko pa siyang nagustuhan habang tumatagal. Kahit sa malayo ko lang siya nakikitang muli. Na parang dati ay naabot ko na dahil nahawakan at nakakausap ko na siya.

I adore him that much. Na kahit ilang taon ko na siyang gusto ay mas lumalim lang ito.

I thought my feelings for him before will fade, but eventually, it’s getting worse.

“Nakatingin siya sa’yo kanina Blair. Ayiee! Kinikilig na ’tong si gaga oh,” sabi ni Maica habang nakatingin din sa librong binabasa niya. Animong wala siyang sinabi dahil prente itong nakaupo.

My forehead creased. I used to her mocking me. Ngayon na nga lang ulit dahil sa tuwing ginagawa niya iyon ay kapag nandyaan lang si Ace.

Madalas rin siyang magreto sa akin ng iba’t ibang boys pero tinigil niya rin dahil alam na raw niya kung bakit ayaw ko.

I looked in Ace’s way and I saw his gazes on me. His grey eyes were humid. Like he’s intimidating everyone by his glares. His intimidating air didn’t change, he became more stern and stoic.

Nahuli niya ang tingin ko kaya naman ay agad akong nag-iwas ng tingin. Umalis na rin siya agad kalaunan nang makita niya ang hinahanap niyang libro.

Nagtaka naman ako ng dito pa siya sa library namin naghanap at nagpunta para sa isang libro. While there is a library in the college department.

The pageant came for Mr. And Ms. Intramurals and me as a representative of the seniors. Nag-umpisa na rin ang practice at parang normal nalang sa akin ito dahil taon taon din naman akong sumasali.

Nakita ko si Angela nang mag-uumpisa na kami ng practice. Iba ang strand niya kaya magkalaban kami.

At mukhang siya rin ang napili nila na mag represent ng track nila. Nag-iba na rin ang ayos niya. Mula sa dating hindi maayang paningin ay naging maayos na siya.

I can even see her makeup. I also put some makeup on my face but it’s just a pressed powder. Nakikita ko rin siya minsan sa practice na pinupuntahan siya ni Ace.

I admit that I envy her for that.

Ewan ko kung anong meron sa kanila ni Ace pero simula pa no’n ay madalas ko na siyang makita kasama niya sila. Maybe they were friends and Ace was just helping her.

Marami ring naiingit kay Angela pero marami naman ang nagsasabi na bagay daw sila.

Sa bagay, Angela comes from a rich family as well. Hindi lang agad napansin iyon dahil hindi siya palaayos sa kaniyang sarili noon. Hindi sila nagkakalayo ni Ace kaya bagay na bagay sila.

I feel bitter every time I think of it.

The pageant came. Nagramp na kami ng casual at sportswear at nakapasok ako sa top three. Nasagot ko naman ang tanong at naghiyawan ang lahat pagkatapos.

“Go, Blair!!! You’re a legend! Ang galing galing mo sa Q and A!”

“Wooo!!! Mananalo ka nanaman this year! Ang galing galing mo!”

“Go pretty Blair! Go pretty Blair!”

“We love you Blair!”

Some of the crowd cheered for me. I am happy to hear it from them.

Magpasahanggang ngayon ay medyo hindi pa rin ako nasasanay sa ganoong sigaw nila para sa akin pero nakakataba ng puso ang kanilang mga suporta.

I really appreciate it. Their balloons, tarpaulins, and whistles that contribute to their huge support for me.

This school was a huge campus, kaya kapag nakilala ka, it’s either hahangaan ka nila o sisiraan. And I’m thankful that they are supporting me and admire me at the same time.

The host will now announce the winner.

I’m candidate number thirteen, Angela is one of the top three and she’s the number twelve.

Kaming dalawa nalang ang natitira para sa winner ng first runner up and for the reigning Ms. Intramurals title for this school year.

“The winner of Ms. Intramurals is candidate number…” pambibitin ng host.

The crowd was now shouting their bets.

“We have a new winner! Candidate number twelve!” the host announced.

My smile slightly fade. But I still composed it. The crowds became wild when Angela started to walk near at the host.

Nakangiti niyang ikinaway ang kamay niya sa mga tao.

For four consecutive times na nanalo ako bilang Ms. Intramurals ngayon ay nanalo bilang first runner up. Bahagya akong nalungkot pero masaya pa rin ako dahil may nakatalo na sa akin.

My supporters looked sad about the result. I waved at them to show that it’s fine with me. That I am happy even though I am no longer the reigning Ms. Intramurals.

I smiled and waved my hand at them when I receive the sash.

Natapos ang pageant at nagligpit na rin sila Mommy ng gamit kasama ang dalawa niyang alalay.

“Nako, Ma’am. Mas maganda naman ang naging sagot ng anak ninyo kesa sa nanalong kandidata.” ani ng isang bading habang tinitiklop ang isang gown na sinuot ko kanina.

I am now sitting here in front of the mirror. I already changed my clothes with a simple knee-ripped black skinny jeans with a white top and draped gray cardigan.

Medyo malamig na rin sa labas dahil gabi na.

“Opo Ma’am. I swear! Baka nadaya tayo sa scoring? Hindi ba at lagi namang si Blair ang nananalo?” tanong pa ng isang bading na katulong ni Mom sa pag-aayos.

We’re now here at backstage at wala na ang ibang kandidata. Kami nalang ang nandito ngayon sa loob.

“Hindi ko alam. Pero sa tingin ko, Blair should be the winner!” Mom exclaimed with conviction.

Napatingin nalang ako sa cellphone ko ng tumunog ito sa ibabaw ng table sa aking harapan.

It was Maica who texted me.

Maica:

Sayang Blair at hindi na ikaw ang nanalo bilang Ms. Intramurals ngayon. But it’s okay. You’re still my number one! Congratulations pa rin!

I smiled a bit at her text.

Ako:

Thank you! Don’t forget our dinner. I also invited Clark and Johnson and said they were going.

I replied to her.

Nag packed up na rin sila Mommy at lumabas na kami.

Naabutan namin sila Angela at ang iba pang mga estudyanteng nagpapapicture sa kaniya sa baba ng stage.

May iilan namang tumingin sa gawi namin. May mga bumati rin sa akin. Umalis na kami at umuwi na ng bahay.

That day is so tiring. And like the usual routine hindi na ako pumasok the next day dahil napagod ako kahapon. Bukas nalang ako papasok.

I rest the whole day. I just sleep in my bed and eat afterward. Nanood rin ako ng iilang mga movies at nakatulugan na rin kalaunan.

I woke up the next day. I go to my bathroom and take a bath. I go out and went to my vanity after I wear my uniform. I put some pressed powder on my face and lip tint for my lips to redden it a bit. I didn’t put blush on. I like my blushing cheeks naturally.

I went out of my room and went downstairs. Pumasok na ako ng dining room namin at nakita ko si Dad na nakaupo na sa kabisera ng lamesa. While Mom is on her sit, sipping on her coffee.

I approached them and kiss them on their cheeks as I greeted them.

“Good morning Dad, Mom.”

“Morning sweety” Dad uttered.

“Hmm. Morning Blair. Eat your breakfast na at baka mahuli ka pa sa klase mo.” Mom said.

I smiled and go to take my seat. I started eating my food when Dad suddenly spoke.

“Friday ngayon at pupunta rito mamaya si Ace, Blair,” Dad informed me.

I stopped and looked at his way. My forehead creased.

“Maybe it’s better if he’ll take you home. Kasi dito na rin naman ang punta niya. Like before, hindi ba at sya rin naman ang naghahatid sa iyo pauwi when me and your Mom were at the convention? Sabay nalang kayo papunta rito.” Dad said nonchalantly.

He said it like it was nothing. He used to Ace hanging here in our house when they have something to talk about. I refused about what he said. But I don’t know how I will decline Dad’s offer.

And it wasn’t like an offer. It was his command that I should obey.

Ibinaba ko ang hawak kong kubyertos.

“Uhmm, Dad wala po ba tayong ibang driver? Ace is now a college student and his department was far from our campus.” I suggested muttered.

“I already told him and he said it’s fine. So don’t worry. Hintayin mo nalang siya sa parking lot ng school mo.” He reassured me.

I sighed. I think it’s time to face him. And I shouldn’t be worried about being with him. It’s actually what I like, right?

I went out of my car when it was parked in front of our school gate. Natanaw ko naman agad ang gawi ni Maica na pababa ng kanilang sasakyan.

“Hi! Good morning Blairy!” She giggled then approached me.

“Goodmorning! Bakit dito ka nagpahatid? Hindi ba at sa parking ka usually bumababa?” I asked her.

The parking was on the other side of our campus and we are now here at the front gate.

“Wala lang gusto kong maglakad lakad sa umaga. Let’s go!” She said as she clung her arms to me.

We walked to the school field and go to the garden side. The school fields and the garden look really refreshing, especially in the morning.

Marami ring estudyante ang dumadaan dito. There are a few benches in the shade of the trees so it’s nice to hang out here.

“Bakit ka absent kahapon? Hindi ka nakamove on?” Maica asked out of nowhere.

Nagtataka naman akong napatingin sa kaniya.

“Sa pageant,” she then explained nang mapansing hindi ko naintindihan ang kaniyang sinabi.

Napamaang naman ako ng bahagya.

“Hindi ah! Napagod lang ako at saka lagi naman na akong ganito after the pageant.” I said.

“Joke lang! ito naman so defensive! Buti nga at hindi na sumali itong si Elena, kung hindi baka si Angela na itong inaway niya dahil hindi siya yung nanalo.” she said then laugh afterward.

Well, Elena was really competitive. Nagtaka nga rin ako kung bakit hindi siya sumali this year.

“Good morning Angela!”

“Hi Angela! Grabe ang ganda mo!”

“Goodmorning! Thank you!”

I heard Angela’s voice near us.

Marami sa kaniyang bumabati at lumalapit ngayon. Dahil na rin siguro sa pagkapanalo niya kahapon.

“Tingnan mo nga naman, marami lang bumabati sa kaniya lumaki na ang ulo! ‘Thank you!’ Ganda ka girl?” Ani Maica habang ginaya pa nito ang sinabi ni Angela.

I winced at that. I looked at Maica to shut her up dahil baka marinig nito ang pinagsasasabi niya.

“Why? Look at her face! Ang kapal niyang mag make-up. Mukha na siyang clown sa kapal ng concealer niya.” she said sarcastically.

I sighed. Marami pa namang estudyante ang kasabay naming maglakad at hindi malabong marinig nila ang sinabi ni Maica.

This girl is really unstoppable. Her mouth is so noisy and has no filter.

“What did you say?” It was Angela who asked from behind.

Bahagya naman akong nagulat nang bigla siyang magtanong. She heard it! We stopped walking when Maica turned her head to face Angela’s way.

“Sino’ng mukhang clown?” Nakakunot na ang noong tanong ni Angela.

Animong alam niyang siya ang tinutukoy ni Maica pero gusto pa rin niyang malaman.

A few students were also looking at us.

“You? Oh wait. Do you want me to give you a mirror to see your self? Ang kapal mo kasing maglagay ng concealer and your foundation were too thick.” Walang prenong sinabi ni Maica.

I gulped. Oh god. This is gonna be trouble. Bakit ba kasi ayaw pa ni Maica na manahimik? She’s judging Angela in front of the crowd. Paniguradong pag-iinitan siya ng ibang estudyante dahil sa ginagawa niyang ito.

Angela’s mouth was dropped open. She raised her brows at Maica.

“Gano’n ba? Sigi hindi nalang ako maglalagay, pangit atang tingnan.” malungkot na sabi ni Angela.

Nagulat naman ako sa sinabi niya. Even Maica shook her head.

“Hindi ah! You are pretty kaya Angela! Don’t mind her, inggit lang yan.”

“Hoy Maica! Di mo ba alam na nakakadown ’yang mga pinagsasasabi mo?”

“Hay nako! Naiinis lang ’yan kay Angela because she’s the new Ms. Intramurals Queen at hindi na si Blair!”

“Mga inggratang ’to! Go away and stop being bitter.”

Sigaw ng ilang mga estudyanteng nakarinig sa sinabi ni Maica.

Hinila ko na paalis si Maica palayo ro’n dahil nag-iinit na ang mga tao sa amin. Aapila pa sana siya kaso pinigilan ko na dahil mas lalo lang siyang pag iinitan ng mga ito.

“That woman is very pretentious! I know that I cursed her. But what she just said? What is that? She just only wants other sympathies!” Maica ranted.

Napailing-iling naman ako sa kaniya.

“Maica, what you did was wrong. You should apologize to her.” I told her calmly.

Her forehead suddenly creased like I have said something wrong.

“I heard her Blair. Kausap niya si Elena about the pageant. At ikaw talaga dapat yung nanalo kaso dinaya nila yung score mo. They knew the jury and said it was Elena’s relative.”

Nagtataka naman akong tumitig sa kaniya.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“The jury was so biased! And it was Angela from the beginning. It was all planned.” she said in a very disgustingly and disappointing way.

Pumasok na kami sa klase namin at hindi mawala wala sa isip ko ang sinabi ni Maica. She heard them in the locker room. Hindi ko alam na hanggang ngayon ay may galit pa rin pala itong si Elena sa akin.

And Angela? What’s wrong with her?

Natapos ang klase maghapon na puro ’yon ang laman ng isip ko. Maghapon din naming topic ni Maica iyong sinabi niya sa akin.

Wala naman na akong pakialam kung siya ang nanalo. Pero sana hindi nila ’yon dinaya. It’s still so unfair.

Pumunta na ako ng parking lot para hintayin si Ace dahil sabi ni Dad ay dito niya raw ako susunduin.

Naglalakad ako ng makita ko si Elena at Angela na nag-uusap.

“Hahaha! Akala niya talaga siya na naman ang mananalo? She’s so full of herself! Dapat na ikaw naman ang manalo, lalo na at first time mo. Buti nalang at napakiusapan ko si Auntie.” I saw and heard Elena said.

I was now hiding behind the wall nang maabutan ko sila ni Angela na nag-uusap ro’n.

“I know. At saka dapat ako naman ang mapansin ni Ace. Hindi yung puro siya nalang palagi.” I heard Angela uttered.

My forehead creased at that. Ano bang sinasabi nila? I mean, ako, napapansin ni Ace?

“She’s just pretty face but she’s a slut!”

Nanlaki naman ang mga mata ko nang marinig ko iyon.

Ano na naman ba ang nagawa ko sa kanila? And if I wasn’t mistaken, it’s about Ace. Hindi ko naman inaagaw sa kanila si Ace ah!

“Yeah, I will agree!”

Hindi ko na natagalan pa ang pagtayo sa likod ng pader. I went out and showed myself to them.

“So it was planned from the very beginning?” I then asked them.

Nagitla naman sila ng ilang sandali nang makita akong lumabas mula sa pagtatago sa pader.

“Hmm. Yes? Bakit may magagawa ka pa ba?” Pag-amin ni Elena. She’s smirking now.

I turned my gaze at Angela who’s looking at me languidly.

“Ano yung sinasabi mo kanina Angela? That I’m a slut?” naiinis na tanong ko sa kaniya.

She raised her brow at me. And eyed me like she’s being superior.

“Oo! You always get their attention! Simula ng nanalo ka sa pageant na iyan. Even Ace, I like him but he only sees you! You are a slut!” Nanggagalaiting sinabi niya.

Nagtataka at hindi makapaniwala naman akong nakatingin sa kaniya ngayon.

I rarely see Ace and then he gets my attention? Eh siya nga itong madalas na kasama niya.

“Hindi niya ako mapansin kahit na lagi ko siyang kasama dahil sa iyo!”

Nagulat ako ng bigla niya akong nilapitan at hinila ang aking buhok. Napahawak naman ako sa kamay niya at saka ko siya kinalmot ng kuko ko para bitiwan ako.

Masakit ang sabunot niya. Habang si Elena naman ay nanood lang sa amin.

Pilit kong inaabot ang ulo ni Angela para sabunutan din sya pero hindi ko magawa. She was moving out her face as she pulled my hair profusely.

Pero hindi pa rin ako tumigil hanggang sa nahatak ko na ang kaniyang buhok. She screamed as I pulled her hair down.

At saka tinulak ko siya ng buong lakas para maghiwalay na kami at malayo ako sa kaniyang pagkasabunot at kalmot sa aking mga braso.

Napabagsak naman siya sa sahig. Nakatukod ang siko sa simento, magulo ang buhok habang ang mga mata’y nanlilisik na nakatingin sa akin.

“Hindi ko alam kung ano ’yang mga sinasabi mo! Kaya tigilan mo ako Angela dahil wala akong ginagawang masama sa iyo. And if it because of Ace’s attention, why don’t you try to ask him about it? Baka sakaling bigyan ka niya ng atensyong gusto mo.” Ani ko habang habol habol ang aking hininga.

My hair was messed up. Nagusot na rin ang uniform ko. Hinawi ko ang buhok kong tumatabon sa aking mukha at hinarap siyang muli.

I saw her glares towards my back. I didn’t pay attention to it.

I noticed that she was slowly crying. She started to sobs like I hurt her so much even it was her who started and hurt me in the first place.

And I was surprised when I saw Ace suddenly showed up to attended to her.

Nagulat at natigilan naman ako nang balingan ako ni Ace habang hawak niya ang braso ni Angela. It seems like it was my fault. His gaze was judging me already. I looked away when I can’t take it anymore.

I swallowed hard when I heard Angela’s sobs. It was getting hard and heavy as seconds passed by.

Kabanata 20

Kabanata 20

I like you

“Ace! She pushed me! Wala naman akong ginagawang masama sa kaniya. She’s said that I’m not worthy to be the winner.” Angela said in between her sobs.

Her tears are falling down to her cheeks. She looked at Ace like she was offended and bullied by me. Nagtataka naman akong nakatingin sa kaniya.

She’s acting that I did something bad to her even she’s the one who hurt me first.

“Why did you push her?” seryosong tanong sa akin ni Ace.

His eyes were like daggers on me, piercing. It’s like that I hurt her girl.

Mukha siyang galit habang nakatingin sa akin nang tinanong niya ako. Hindi naman ako makapaniwalang tumingin sa kaniya.

My lips parted when I tried to say something but Elena suddenly spoke.

“Sinabunutan niya si Angela, Ace! Pinapalayo niya ako dahil ako daw ang sasaktan niya kapag nakialam ako sa kanila.” Elena interrupted.

Doon na tuluyang nanalaki ang mga mata ko. Umawang ang bibig ko sa hindi makapaniwalang dahilan na ibinibigay nila kay Ace.

I do really pulled her hair but Elena’s next statement was purely a lie!

Sinisiraan nila ako harap harapan kay Ace! And he seems so innocent about it all. He seems to believe them without hearing my statement about what really happens.

Binabaliktad nila ang mga pangyayari at ako ang pinapalabas na masama. Nanlumo naman ang balikat ko nang tumingin ako ulit sa kaniya.

He looked in dismay at me. I’ll try to explain my side to lighten him in what is really happened.

“I didn’t pushed her Ace because of that. And Elena was lying! Sila itong narinig kong nag-uusap about sa pageant and the-”

“Hold on… Ihahatid ko muna si Angela sa kanila. Just wait for me here.” he said like he’s not accepting my reasons. Avoiding me because my explanation has nothing to be validated.

He even hushed me while I’m explaining! So this means that she believes Angela and Elena over me? Oh, God.

“Pero Ace, siya yung nauna. Sinabunutan niya ako kaya ko siya tinulak,” pagpapaliwanag ko pa dahil baka sakaling pakinggan niya ako.

He only took a glance at me. My heart hurt as I looked at him with his eyes bore in seriousness. Hindi na niya pinansin pa ang sinabi ko at inalalayan na si Angela na makasakay ng sasakyan niya.

“Ah! M-Masakit Ace.” Daing pa ni Angela nang bahagya itong nasagi ng hita ni Ace.

“I’m sorry. Dumaan muna tayo ng clinic bago kita ihatid sa inyo.” Ace calmly said to her.

Napayuko nalang ako sa kinatatayuan ko at saka bumuntong hininga.

Bakit hindi man lang ako pinakinggan ni Ace? Bakit parang si Angela pa ang kinampihan niya kahit na ako naman ’tong nasaktan nila?

I feel pity for myself. I felt like I’m such a loser.

Tumingin ako sa gawi nila nang tuluyan nang umandar ang sasakyan ni Ace.

He really left me. And he believes her over than me. He didn’t even try to hear me out. I can’t believe it.

Elena laughs hysterically afterward that caught my attention. I lifted my eyes on her.

“Kawawang Blair. Hindi man lang pinakinggan ni Ace. Hindi ba at gusto mo ’yon? Kaso mukhang iba ata ang gusto, kasi hindi ka niya kinampihan. So pathetic.”

My forehead creased at her assertion. Tumingin ako kay Elena nang may naiinsultong mga mata.

“I know that you like him. Masyado kang halata girl! But sorry because he wouldn’t like you back, kapag napanood niya na ’tong video na ito.” sabi niya, sabay pakita ng video sa kaniyang cellphone.

My eyes widened as I looked at the screen of her phone.

Pinapakita roon kung paano ko hinila ang buhok ni Angela pababa. Pati ang pagkalmot ko sa kaniyang braso ay nakuhanan doon. And Angela looks so helpless.

At ang saktong pagkakatulak ko sa kaniya. The video was cut and continued when she started to cry. It ended when Ace suddenly came up to help her. At ako lang mismo ang lalabas na nananakit dahil puro ako lang ang pinapakita sa video na ’yon!

“No! Don’t do this. Hindi naman talaga ako ang unang nanakit! You know that! Please stop this!” I said as I plead with her.

Mahaba ang mga kuko ko kaya kitang kita sa video ang pagkakaguhit ng pagkalmot ko sa braso niya. Paniguradong maraming tao ang magagalit sa akin dahil sa video na ’yon.

“No, way. Bakit ko naman gagawin ’yon? Bakit kita kakaawaan? Baka nakakalimutan mo yung ginawa mo sa amin ni Lisa before?”

Napaisip naman ako sa sinabi niya.

What is she talking about? Eh sila nga itong nanggugulo sa akin that time.

“Wala akong ginawa sa inyo noon, Elena. And it was you and Lisa who humiliate me in front of the crowd.”

“Hindi mo ba alam? We are suspended for a week! Because someone reported us! At sinabihan kaming huwag nang lumapit sayo dahil tatanggalin nila kami sa eskwelahang ’to! And without saying na apo ako ng may ari ng paaralang ito. They will expel us if that happened again.”

“Hindi ko na kasalanan ’yon! And what you’re doing right now is wrong! Hindi mo ba alam na baka tuluyan ka na talagang ma-expelled this time?” tanong ko sa kaniya.

She’s not even stunned by my question.

“Not me. Maybe you. Ikaw ang ma-e-expelled at hindi ako! Kitang kita sa video na sinasaktan mo si Angela, so better prepared your things for the suspension, Blair.” She remarked before she leaves an evil smirk on me. Umalis na siya at tinalikuran ako.

Hindi ko naman alam ang gagawin ko. Pwedeng pwedeng ikalat ni Elena ang video na ’yon para palabasin na ako ang masama. People can easily be fooled when they watched the video.

It’s so frustrating that I can’t do anything to stop her.

Nakita kong sumakay na si Elena ng sasakyan at nagawa pa niya akong kawayan. Nanggigigil ko lang siyang tiningnan mula sa kinaroronan niya.

Mag-isa nalang ako ngayong nakatayo dito sa parking lot. Wala na ring ibang sasakyan ngayon dito dahil nakauwi na ang lahat. Ace is still not here. Natagalan siguro siya sa paghatid kay Angela.

Nanghina naman ako nang maalala ko kung paano niyang alalayan si Angela kanina. It was so gentle like he was very worried about her.

I sighed heavily. I thought he will hear my side but it seems that he doesn’t even care about it. And he just leaves me here alone, waiting for him.

Tumingala ako sa kalangitan at nakita ang unti unting pagdilim ng ulap, senyales ng malakas na pag-ulan. I looked down as the rain fell. I bit my lower lip for seconds.

Napakurap kurap ako nang maramdaman ang pag-agos ng mainit na tubig sa aking mga mata.

I like Ace and he didn’t know it. Paano kapag nalaman niyang gusto ko siya, magugustuhan din kaya niya ako?

I hurt her girl and I know that he’s mad at me, because of that.

Hindi ko alam kung ano ba talaga ang mayroon sa kanila ni Angela, pero halata namang espesyal ito para sa kaniya. And I envy her for that. I wish I have his care for me. I have him even as his friend.

Dahan dahan akong naglakad paalis ng parking lot. Sinuong ang malakas na ulan at hindi inalinta ang lamig ng hangin.

Naiiyak ako sa isiping hindi naman talaga kami naging magkaibigan ni Ace dati. I just became a nobody to him even we have short conversations before.

Ang bigat ng aking loob habang inihahakbang ang mga paa ko.

He treated me better. He even sees me as a kid. And he always appeared on time that I never expect him to be there. I thought he was the one who will protect me. But he wasn’t.

My hot tears tumble on my cheeks as the rain fall and dripped with my tears together.

Nanginginig at basang basa na ako ng ulan pero hindi ko iyon inalintana. Ace didn’t even try to hear me out. Is that how special Angela to him? Is that how much he cared for her more than me?

“Blair! What the fuck. Bakit ka nagpapaulan?” Narinig kong sigaw ng pamilyar na baritonong boses mula sa aking malayong harapan.

Hindi ko namalayan ang pagdating ng sasakyan nito dahil masiyadong malakas ang buhos ng ulan. Dahan dahan ko namang iniangat ang paningin ko sa kaniya at nagtama ang aming mga tingin.

My heart starts pounding so loud. Throbbing with a mix of bitterness that she chose to believe Angela over me.

I saw a wave of raw anger in his eyes as he glances at me from afar with the drawn of flushing raindrops. He looked mad as he approached me.

Natanaw ko pang may hawak itong payong sa kanang kamay niya at dali dali akong nilapitan.

Lumakas ng bahagya ang simoy ng hangin kasabay ng pagbuhos ng malakas na ulan. Agad namang tinablan ng lamig ang aking katawan. Nanginginig na ako nang nilapitan niya. Basang basa na ako nang maisukob niya sa akin ang payong na dala niya.

Nagulat naman ako nang maramdaman ang katawan niyang nakayakap na sa akin ngayon. I didn’t expect his sudden move. He’s now wrapping my cold skin with his warm embrace.

Ace…

I felt the warmth of his body. It gives me comfort and calms the wild beating of my heart.

We stayed in that moment for a while. Standing at the side of the street while his arms around on me.

Dinama ko ang mainit na dulot ng kaniyang katawan sa aking malamig na balat. I shut my eyes as I felt his warm embrace on me.

Hindi naman siya nagsalita at gano’n din naman ako. Kumalas na siya sa pagkakayakap sa akin kalaunan at inalalayan ako papunta sa kaniyang sasakyan.

He held my hand and I felt his callous palm and fingers holding me tightly.

I took a glimpse at him, slightly stunned by his sudden moves. He glared at me with a cloud in his eyes. He looked weary as he roams his eyes on me.

I swallowed hard as I gazed at his body, which is now slightly wet by the rain because of me.

He’s wearing his plain white shirt, at basa na halos ito dahil sa pagkakayap niya sa akin kanina. Walang sabi sabi niya akong inalayan patungo sa loob ng kaniyang sasakyan.

Marahan at maingat ang pagkakahawak niya sa akin habang naglalakad kami. He opened the door for me as I enter inside. Agad naman siyang sumunod na sumakay sa kabila.

Basa ang buong katawan ko kaya paniguradong mababasa ko itong upuan ng sasakyan niya.

“Wear your seatbelt, Blair,” he muttered deeply.

“I’m wet Ace, I’m sorry,” I muttered. I felt my cheeks flushed when I realize what I’d just said.

He only glared at me. His forehead wrinkled and his eyes darken.

Umiwas naman ako ng tingin nang hindi ko na makayanan ang kaniyang mga titig.

Malamig din sa loob ng kaniyang sasakyan at napansin niya ata ang panginginig ko kaya pinatay niya ang aircondition.

Then I saw him getting something from the back seat. Iniabot niya sa akin ang isang coat na kulay itim. Sinuot ko naman agad ito dahil giniginaw na ako.

He started to roar the engine. Pinaandar na niya ang sasakyan habang ang mga mata ko ay nananatiling sa kalsada ang tingin.

Malakas pa rin ang buhos ng ulan at dumidilim na rin ang kalangitan.

I looked at his way when I noticed his gaze on me. Is he mad because I pushed Angela?

Nakakunot pa rin ang noo nitong nakatingin sa kalsada nang balingan ko siya ng tingin. Ang kilay niya ay halos mag-isang linya na sa sobrang pagkakasalubong.

His jaw clenched like he was struggling with something. He gritted his teeth and maybe it’s because of me.

Maybe he is really mad.

“I’m sorry, about what happened. Angela was pulling my hair and I can’t stop her, that’s why I pushed her.” Pagpapaliwanag ko sa kaniya, umaasang sa pagkakataong ito ay pakinggan na niya ako.

Siguro ay galit siya sa akin ngayon dahil nasaktan ko si Angela, pero nasaktan din naman ako. And it’s her who started it. That’s what I want him to know.

Hindi ko alam kung papaniwalaan ako ni Ace ngayon pero wala na akong pakialam. The video will probably out tomorrow. Ano pa bang saysay ng pagpapaliwanag ko kung mapapanood niya naman ’yon at ako lang naman ang pinapakitang nananakit at lalabas na masama.

I frowned. I looked at the window once again and didn’t turn back at him.

Hindi naman siya nagsalita o nagkumento man lang sa sinabi ko. And I was explaining it for how many times now.

“I told you to wait for me at the parking lot. Bakit hindi mo ako ro’n hinintay?” he asked me with his humid deep voice.

I turned my gaze at him. I just looked at him and didn’t bother to answer his question.

As if he cares for me. E’ si Angela lang naman yung tinutulungan niya. Mas inuna niya pa ngang ihatid ’yon kesa sa akin.

“Blair,” he muttered narrowly. Now his voice is cold.

I gulped. “Ang tagal mong dumating kaya nauna na ako.” Sagot ko nang makaramdam ang matinding kaba dahil sa kaniyang tono ng pagtawag sa aking pangalan.

He then chuckled hoarsely but I know it was faked like he was mocking me.

I looked away.

“Naglakad ka paalis. Mabuti sana kung sumakay ka ng taxi.” Ramdam ko ang talim at riin sa tono ng kaniyang pananalita.

Napakurap kurap naman ako.

“What? So, wala ka talagang balak na balikan ako ron para sunduin. Dahil si Angela lang yung priority mo, ganoon ba?” I asked him profusely with my voice in raise a bit.

Sumulyap siya sa akin saglit at agad din naman niyang iniwas iyon pabalik sa daan.

“You’re my topmost priority if you only knew.” mahinang aniya pa.

My heart crazily thumping as I looked at him. I clearly heard what he said but it’s hard to believe it.

“But you’re mad at me because I hurt your girl,” I retorted, enough for him to hear it.

“I’m not mad because you hurt her, I’m mad because I left you. At naabutan pa kitang basang basa sa ulan.” I saw how his jaw clenched after he said that.

Napayuko naman ako. Hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ko sa kaniya. But why he’s mad that he left me when the other way around is he attended Angela first over me?

“Believe me or not, siya talaga yung nauna-” he immediately cutted me off.

“I believe you. No need for your explanation, Blair.”

His words were really gentle to me now. He said it like he was really believed in me.

I licked my lips as I lifted my head to face him. His eyes were still focused on the road.

“I thought you didn’t believe me,”

“Why not? I know you better kaya maniniwala ako sa’yo.”

He knows me better? How well he knows me?

“She’s your girl-”

“She’s not. Stop saying it again. Because I only have one girl and it’s not her, Blair.”

I gulped when he said that.

I thought they have a relationship. I didn’t know that it was just a rumor. But he said that he has one. So who’s his lucky girl?

Agad naman akong naging kuryoso sa sinabi niya. Nakarating na kami ng bahay at hindi pa rin tumitila ang ulan.

Wala na ring liwanag sa kalangitan. Medyo ginabi na kami ng uwi. Pareho kaming sumukob sa isang payong papuntang pintuan ng bahay.

Nakaakbay pa sa akin ang braso nito at nakahawak ng mahigpit. Saka ko lang napansin na nakapatong pala ang kamay nito sa kamay kong nakahawak din sa payong. Inalis din naman niya ng makitang nakatingin ako ron.

Pumasok na kami sa loob ng bahay at agad naman kaming dinaluhan ng iba naming kasambahay nang makitang basa kami pareho ng ulan.

Inabutan nila kami ng tuwalya, pangtuyo sa medyo basa naming katawan ngayon.

Bahagya naman ng natuyo ang aking katawan habang nasa biyahe kami kanina sa loob ng kaniyang sasakyan. Kaya ibinalot ko nalamang iyon sa magkabila kong balikat.

Napatingin naman ako kay Ace nang ipatong niya pa ang tuwalya niya sa akin. Wala tuloy siyang gagamitin ngayon.

“I’m fine. You should use this one, I know you’re cold too.” I then said to him.

Hindi naman niya pinansin ang sinasabi ko. Bigla namang dumating si Manang Soling dala ang isa pang tuwalya at iniabot ito kay Ace.

“Bakit ba kayo nagpabasa sa ulan? Baka magkasakit kayo niyan sa ginagawa niyo,” ani Manang habang tinutulungan akong balutin ang katawan ko.

“Wala pa ang mga magulang mo Blair, marahil ay naabutan din sila ng ulan sa biyahe kaya sila natagalan sa pag-uwi.”

I heard Ace groaned beside me.

“Change your clothes, you might get sick of that.” Ace then reprimanded me.

“Oo nga, hija. Magpalit ka na para hindi ka magkasakit. Ikaw din Ace, may ilang guess room kami riyang bukas. Ipapahatid nalang kita ron.” Manang Soling said worriedly.

Tumango naman ako at tinalikuran na sila. I went upstairs and entered my room.

I gasped as I closed the door. Napahawak ako sa dibdib ko at dinama ang malakas na pagkabog ng puso ko. Hindi ko mapangalanan ang paghuhuramentado nito.

And when I calm down myself for a bit, I went to my bathroom and cleaned myself. Nagpalit na rin ako ng damit ko at nagpahid ng konting lotion sa aking balat bago ako lumabas ng aking silid.

Pababa na ako ng hagdan nang makasalubong ko si Ace na naglalakad kasabay ko pasalubong sa aking gawi.

I looked at him and I smelled his fragrant scent. His scent is so manly. His hair is a bit damp. Bagsak lang ito at ang iba ay nakatabon sa gilid ng noo.

He’s wearing a simple white v-neck shirt and his usual pants.

“Let’s talk,” he suddenly spoke which made me blinked.

I was surprised as I glared at him. Talk about what?

I nervously followed him down the stairs. He headed to our living room then sat there and faced me over time.

Naupo naman ako sa katabing sofa na inuupuan niya.

I saw him tapped the side of his sit. Umusog pa siya ng bahagya na parang binibigyang espasyo ang nasa gilid niyang bahagi. Nakatingin siya sa akin nang ginawa niya iyon.

Nakuha ko naman ang ibig niyang sabihin at naupo na sa tabi niya.

The sofa was large and can accommodate four people. I was just embarrassed to stand next to him earlier but because he invited me, I sat down too.

Malayo naman ang pagitan naming dalawa, pero pakiramdam ko ay ang lapit lapit namin masyado sa isa’t isa.

“What are we going to talk about?” I then asked him curiously.

“Huwag mo ng lapitan sila Elena. They might hurt you next time.”

Kumunot naman ang noo ko sa sinabi niya.

“Just listen to me okay? I am protecting you, trust me.” He said assuringly.

I just nodded my head later on.

I don’t get his point but maybe it’s about what happened earlier. At isa pa ay ayaw ko rin naman ng gulo kaya hangga’t maaari ay iniiwasan ko na sila.

Elena was not just a bitch student base on my opinion. Marami na akong narinig na pinaggagawa niya at lahat iyon ay hindi ko gugustuhing mangyari sa akin. But what am I going to do? Siya ’tong lumalapit sa akin at ginugulo ako.

Manang Soling came and told us that she already prepared the dining for us two. Nauna na kaming kumain ni Ace ng sabay dahil wala pa sila Mom at Dad.

Lately, my parents were busy with our company. Our company wasn’t that big as Ventura’s but it’s promising. We all have good architects and engineers that provide a good foundation in building hotels, villages, and even skyscrapers. It was the group of team that my Dad build with great people.

That is why investors often hire our company to help them. And to be fact, our company is now under by the Ventura Holdings. Kaya napadalas talaga rito si Ace nung bakasyon, marahil ay maraming inaasikaso sa trabaho.

Natapos kami sa pagkain ng tahimik lang, wala ni isang nagsalita. Nasa salas na kami ngayon ng bahay ng matapos kami sa hapag kainan.

We sat on the couch and silence ate us again. Magkatabi kaming muli at ilang pulgada lang ang pagitan ng aming mga katawan ngayon.

Hindi ko rin alam kung ano ba ang pwede kong sabihin para may mapag kwentuhan man lang kami. Then I remember that I’m not good at making conversation so I just shut up.

“Angela is just my friend. Hindi ko siya girlfriend,” mayamaya ay aniya, pagbasag sa katahimikang kanina pa namamagitan sa aming dalawa.

I bit my lower lip. So he still thinking about it. I know that I misunderstood their relationship, but the rumors helped me to conclude that they were together.

“Uhm, y-you said… you have a girl. I mean, surely you have. I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say that.” nahihiyang sabi ko pa sa kaniya. Hindi makatingin ng tuwid sa kaniyang mga mata na nasa akin ang mga titig.

She has a lot of women but I think this one is so special. Kaya hindi ko maiwasang mag-isip kung sino ba iyong babaeng tinutukoy niya kanina. Is it her schoolmate in college?

“Why do you always have to stutter when you are talking to me?”

Napakurap kurap ako sa tanong niya. Hindi ko alam na napapansin niya pala ang pagkautal ko sa tuwing kausap ko siya.

“I-I’m not.” I swallowed hard.

Nanliit naman ang mga mata niyang tumingin sa akin. He then smirked later on when he noticed I was nervous.

Inalis ko nalang ang tingin ko sa kaniyang mga mata at napatingin sa kaniyang mga kamay.

Then, I remember how his hand held me earlier. It was tight.

“My hands are real. You can touch it if you want.”

Nagulat naman ako nang marinig ko ang sinabi niya. Inilapit pa nito ang mga kamay niya sa akin.

Namamangha naman akong pagmasdan siyang ilapit sa akin iyon. The veins on his hands were visible.

Bigla nalang akong napatingin sa kaniya nang guluhin niya ang buhok ko.

“You’re still a kid,”

“Lagi mo nalang akong sinasabihang bata. I am now a senior high school student, please don’t call me that.” My lips pouted after he disheveled my hair.

“You still remember it?” Animong hindi makapaniwalang tanong nito sa akin

Pinamulahan naman ako ng pisngi.

Of course, I remember it! I memorized everything about him. How his voice like before when I was in my grade seven. I even recognized his changes after years.

I liked him before and I still like him up until now. Kaya lahat ay maaalala ko, maliit na bagay man ’yan, basta tungkol sa kaniya.

“Maybe you have a crush on me, hmm?  Wanna inform me about it?” he proudly uttered while his eyes in dim and seriousness even his voice seems playful.

My eyes widen a fraction. And my heart thumped. I felt my cheeks heated as I looked away from his serious stares.

“You’re blushing. That explains it,” He looked at me indulgently.

Then he chuckled hoarsely afterward.

I swallowed hard and looked away. Ganoon ba ako kahalata na may gusto sa kaniya?

Nahihiya akong hinarap siyang muli. Maybe it’s time for me to admit that I like him since before. I don’t mind if he’ll going to be mad at me. At least I tell him that I liked him.

Inunahan naman ako ng matinding kaba nang maalala kong nakakahiya kung gagawin ko ito at aamin ako sa kaniya. But he asked me already if I have a crush on him and that I need to inform him about it.

Kanina lang, he’s acting like he has cared for me. And now I feel that I’m special to him. Pero hindi naman siguro ’yon basehan para umamin na ako sa kaniya.

I saw him licked his lower lip as he glared at me.

Okay, I’ll do it. Whatever will gonna happen next, I’ll handle it. At isa pa, I kept it to myself for almost years so maybe it’s time for me to let my feelings consume me this time.

I equal his glare on me. Nilalakasan ang loob kong umamin sa kaniya.

“Ace, I-I…I,”

Hindi ko matuloy tuloy ang sasabihin ko dahil sa malakas na pagkabog ng puso ko na dulot ng matinding kaba.

“You, what?” naghihintay na tanong nito sa akin.

He’s seriously looking at me. His glare was intimidating the shit out of me. But I still compose and manage myself to say it out.

“I like you. I have a crush on you since before, Ace.” nakapikit na ngayon ang mga mata kong sinabi iyon sa kaniya.

Mabilis ang paghinga ko dahil sa kabang nararamdaman. My lips parted as I breathe. Wala naman akong narinig na reaksyon mula sa kaniya.

And when I slowly open my eyes to see him. Seryoso lang siyang nakatitig sa akin ng tuwid. I even saw how his jaw moved as he looked at me straight in my eyes.

“I like you too,” he muttered huskily.

Mas dumoble pa ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ko nang sinabi niya iyon. I thought he will be mad at me or he will going to ignore me, because of my confession. But I was wrong. Dahil sa mga oras na ito ay pulos ang malakas na pagtibok lang ng aking puso ang naririnig ko.

We stared at each other. His grey eyes became soft as they bore into me. And everything became slow at that moment. It feels ecstatic to know that he also likes me. It was like a dream that left me in awe like a fantasy.

Ace…he likes me as well.

Kabanata 21

Kabanata 21

Slut

“So you like me,” aniya habang diretsong nakatingin sa aking mga mata. It’s not a question, it’s more like a confirmation to him.

Napalunok naman ako at nangapa ng sasabihin sa kaniya. I looked away. My heart hammered when I felt his hand held my chin and turn it onto his way to face him.

“Y-Yeah,” pag-amin kong muli.

Mabilis pa rin aking paghinga habang nakatitig ng tuwid sa kaniyang mga mata. He looked at me in awe. His glare was different from his usual gaze on me. I saw him licked his luscious lips.

Napatingin naman ako ro’n. Ang mapula niyang labi ay mamasamasa na ngayon.

My lips parted as I stare at his lips.

Umusod siya ng bahagya at lumapit sa akin. We’re now inches away from each other.

“Gusto rin kita,” He said in a deep husky voice.

Aniya sa akin habang ang kaniyang palad ay gumagapang patungo sa aking panga. His eyes hooded as he looked at me straight. He said it in a very serious and sincere way.

Pabilis ng pabilis ang tibok ng puso ko. Hindi ko alam kung ano na ba ang nangyayari sa amin ngayon. I just only think is that he likes me.

That it feels like it was just a dream. I confess my feelings for him and he said that he likes me too. I swallowed hard when his face getting nearer. Hinuli niya ng tingin ang naglilikot kong mga mata.

“I-Impossible, you had a lot of women and all of them are different from me. I’m not your type. So why would you like me?” Instutteringly muttered while my heart throbs wildly.

Tumingin siya sa akin, animong nangungusap ang mga mata.

“I’m too young for you. You said that I’m just a kid and-”

“Aand you said that you are not a kid anymore, hmm?” seryosong aniya na mas lalong nagpadoble sa bilis ng pintig ng aking puso.

I bit my lower lip as I hold my breath. Hindi ko magawang paniwalaan ang mga sinasabi niya sa akin ngayon. Inaamin niya sa akin harap harapan na gusto niya ako. And I can’t help but like him more. At ang sarap sa pakiramdam ng idinudulot ng kaniyang mga salitang nagsasabi na gusto niya rin ako.

His deep-set of cloudy eyes were staring at me softly. Na para bang sinasabi nitong totoo ang lahat ng sinasabi niya.

“A-Are you serious?” Hindi makapaniwalang tanong ko sa kaniya.

“Yes. Ikaw ba, sigurado ka bang gusto mo rin ako?”

“O-Oo naman! I like you since before.”

He then smiled at me smugly.

Hindi ko alam kung ito ba ang unang beses na makita ko siyang nakangiti. He looked so handsome as he smiled at me. Ngumiti rin ako sa kaniya ng pagkatamis tamis kalaunan. Inalis na niya ang pagkakahawak niya sa aking mukha.

“The rain stopped. You should go home.” Ani ko sa kaniya nang mapansing tumila na ang ulan.

“Pinapauwi mo na ako agad pagkatapos mong sabihing gusto mo ako?” aniyang parang nasasaktan siya sa sinabi ko.

I was about to say something on him nang nabaling ang aming mga tingin sa gawi ng paparating na si Manang Soling.

“Uuwi na po ako Manang,” mayamaya ag magalang na sabi ni Ace rito nang makalapit si Manang sa amin.

Nagugulat naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Hindi ko inasahan na uuwi na ngang talaga siya. Lalo na at bakas sa tono ng kaniyang pananalita na gusto pa muna niyang manatili rito nang sabihin kong umuwi na siya.

“Gano’n ba, hijo. Oh siya, sigi. Hindi mo na ba nais hintayin ang mga magulang ni Blair? Nasa daan na rin ’yon panigurado.” pahabol na tanong ni pa Manang.

Ace turned his gaze to Manang then drift on me later on.

“Hindi na po. Baka abutan din po ako ng ulan mamaya kung sakaling nagpatila lamang ito.”

Hindi na naman nagsalita pa si Manang at umalis na rin patungong kusina dahil abala raw siya sa ginagawa niya.

Kaya naman nang kaming dalawa nalang muli ni Ace ang naiwan ay mabilis akong tumungin sa kaniya. He was also staring at me gently as well.

“Go upstairs, matulog ka na,” baling nito sa akin.

“Ihahatid na kita sa labas-”

“Hindi na at baka maambunan ka pa. I want you to rest. Aalis ako kapag nakita kong pumasok ka na sa kuwarto mo.”

Napakagat labi naman akong tiningnan siya.

“Sigi,”

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow.”

I get wonder-stricken, a bit stunned that about what he just said. Hindi naman na siguro inutos sa kaniya ni Dad na sunduin ako kaya bakit pa siya mag-aabala bukas?

“Hindi na, magpapasundo nalang ako sa driver namin. And besides, you’re busy.” I inserted.

“Susunduin kita bukas ng hapon,” pagtatapos nito sa usapan na ani mong hindi pinansin ang aking sinabi.

Napamaang naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Kinagat ko ang aking pang-ibabang labi, nagpipigil ng ngiti.

“What? Go upstairs now,” aniya, habang ang mga tingin niya ay animong nagdidilim na.

Napanguso naman ako ng ilang sandali.

“I didn’t know that you wanted to be my driver.” I then muttered to him.

Hindi ko alam kung saan ako nakakuha ng lakas ng loob para tanungin siya niyon. His forehead creased when I chuckled afterward.

Napapamaang naman niya akong tiningnan.

“Why? Do I still need to apply?” He said cockily with a little smirk, smug on his lips.

He looked hot when he said that. Natikop ko naman ang bibig ko. This man! I didn’t know that he was good at teasing.

“Nope. Because you’re already hired,” I then retorted sweetly.

His brow arched like he’s getting like what I just answered to him.

“Is that so? Kung gayon, pumasok ka na ng kwarto mo at aalis na ako. Your driver will just see you tomorrow again.”

Then I remember na uuwi na nga pala siya. Ilang sandali pa muna kaming nagkatitigan bago ako tuluyang tumalikod at naglakad na patungong hagdanan. Nakikinita ko pa rin siya mula rito baitang habang paakyat ako na pinagmamasdan akong makaakyar

I smiled at him.

“Goodnight,” I saw him mouthed.

I bit my lip and then started walking up the stairs again. Nang makapasok ako ng aking silid ay hindi mawala wala ang ngiting nakakabit sa aking labi. Nakagat ko pa ang pang-ibabang labi ko para pigilin ito. 

At hindi pa rin humihinto sa mabilis na pagtibok itong puso ko magpasahanggang ngayon. I felt my heart jumped over and over again as I think of him saying his words that he liked me.

It’s like a dream for me, the moment he touched my chin and jaw. His intoxicating smell makes my heart pound crazily.

The next day I went to school and I couldn’t help but notice how the other students glared at me. Kung ang napakasayang pakiramdam na naramdaman ko kagabi ay ngayon naman ay mabilis na napalitan ng takot at pangamba.

Hindi ko nalang pinansin ’yon at naglakad na patungong building namin. I tried to smile as I walked freely into the hallway of our building dahil sa iilang mga estudyante na nasa akin ang mga tingin.

“Blair! What happened to you? Are you alright?” Eksaheradang tanong ni Maica sa akin nang makapasok ako sa aming classroom.

Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kaniya.

“Huh? Oo naman, bakit?”

“I watched the video and I don’t believe that you did it for no reason.” nag-aalalang aniya sa akin.

What video? Natigilan naman ako nang maalala kung anong video ang kaniyang tinutukoy. My jaw dropped when I remembered the video she was referring to.

Nakalimutan ko ang tungkol sa video ni Elena sa amin kahapon! I get preoccupied with Ace’s confession to me last night. That I forgot what happened to me yesterday.

Malakas akong napabuga ng hininga nang maalala ko iyon.

“Ano na naman ba ang ginawa ng Angela na iyon sa’yo? And who took that video? Bakit mo siya sinasabunutan do’n?” Sunod sunod na tanong ni Maica sa akin.

I need to explain my side to her. About what is really happened.

“I heard them yesterday in the parking lot. She’s talking to Elena and said they cheated on my score at the pageant that’s why I lost. I was eavesdropping behind the wall and I showed them. Inamin sa akin ni Elena na planado na raw iyon, umpisa pa lang.”

“And? Bakit kayo nagsasabunutan?” Hindi makapaniwalang tanong ni Maica sa akin.

“Angela was fuming mad at me because of Ace. Sabi niya, lagi nalang daw ako ang napapansin ni Ace, then she pulled my hair. I just protecting myself that time, kaya ko siya tinulak.”

“Bwisit talaga ’yang dalawang ’yan kahit na kailan. I knew it! Tapos ngayon sinisiraan ka nila?! At paanong ikaw ang napapansin ni Ace? Sibasabi ko na nga bang may gusto ’yang si Ace kaya laging aaligid-aligid.” Maica said angrily.

Hindi ko naman alam ang gagawin ko dahil paniguradong kalat na ngayon ang video sa buong campus.

Kaya pala gano’n nalamang ang tingin ng mga estudyante sa akin kaninang naglalakad ako. They usually greeted me in the morning and now they are just staring at me weirdly.

The morning class passed and all of my classmates are glaring at me. Mga nanghuhusgang tingin ang ibinibigay nila sa akin.

“Hindi pa rin ata siya nakakamove-on sa pagkatalo niya kaya niya sinaktan si Angela. Kitang kita naman sa video, e’.” I heard my classmates whimpering.

“Grabi naman siya! Four consecutive times na nga siyang nanalo, para ngayon lang siya naging first runner up hindi pa niya matanggap? She’s so greedy.”

“Nakita niyo ba? Kawawa kaya si Angela sa video. Kinalmot at sinabunutan niya muna bago niya tinulak ng malakas. Gano’n ba siya kadesperada para sa title na ’yon?”

I shooked my head at hindi nalang sila pinakinggan. They even raised their brows at me when I took a glance at them. Tumingin nalang ako sa ibaba at hindi na tumingin sa kanila.

They are all think that I’m up for the crown kaya ko nagawa ’yon. They judged me and conclude easily because of that video.

Wala si Maica ngayon dahil inutusan siya ng isa naming guro. Tumungo ako sa palikuran ng mga babae, sa floor lang din namin ng mag-isa bago tuluyang bumaba ng hagdan para pumunta ng cafeteria. Dahil don nalang kami magkikita ni Maica.

Nang makapasok ako ng restroom ay may iilang mga tao rin sa loob. They turned their heads at me and archer their brows. Nakaharap sila ngayon sa malaking salamin at nag-aayos ng kolorete sa kanilang mga mukha.

Napakatalas ng kanilang mga tingin sa akin kaya umiwas nalang ako at dire-diretsong tinungo ang pinto ng isa sa mga cubicle.

“Grabe nga namang talaga. Akalain mo ’yon,  hindi pa nakuntento sa apat na koronang nakuha niya at ngayon ay inaaway pa si Angela dahil lang do’n,”

Narinig kong sabi ng isang babae pagkatapos kong maisarado ang pinto.

“Haven’t you heard? Hindi lang daw iyan ang rason niya. Naiingit daw kasi siya dahil hindi siya napapansin ni Ace kaya niya sinabunutan si Angela. Eh ’di ba nga kasi medyo madalas na kasama ni Angela sila Ace?”

“So it’s true that she’s a slut? Hindi ba at iyan din yung pinag-awayan nila ni Lisa noon sa cafeteria four years ago. Inahas niya raw si Ace kaya sila naghiwalay.”

Mariin kong naipikit ang aking mga mata nang marinig ko ang mga sinasabi nila. I knew they were deliberately raising their voices so they could convey to me what they were saying. And it’s all making up stories!

“Oh my gosh! So she really is a slut! Kaya si Angela naman ngayon ang target niya, kasi madalas sila ngayong makitang magkasamang dalawa. She’s unbelievable, gusto niya ba si Ace kaya niya ginawa ’yon?”

“Gosh, girl! Ang slow mo naman. Oo! Gusto niya si Ace, kaya ganyan siya kadesperadang mapansin. Inggrata siya.”

Hindi ko na nakayanang magkulong pa sa loob ng banyo kaya lumabas na ako. Mataray naman silang tumingin sa akin nang makita nila akong nakatingin sa kanila ng tuwid.

“Sorry pero hindi siya ’yung tinulungan ni Ace, dahil masama ang ugali niya. Akala mo kung sinong santa santita, may tinatago rin palang baho.” the girl said mockingly at me as her eyes peevishly glaring at me.

Agad namang nagpuyos ang loob ko sa sinabi niya.

“You don’t know what really happened. Ginawa ko lang ’yon dahil siya ang nauna-” then someone cutted me off.

“Oh, poor explanation. We don’t need that. Take it to yourself. Para sa mga katulad mong slut and whore you better shut up!” she exclaimed at me.

Namilog naman ang mga mata kong nakatingin sa kanila. Tinalikuran nila ako at sabay sabay na naglakad palabas.

Lalapit na sana ako sa kanila nang bigla nilang isara ang pintuan. I was shocked when I heard them locked the door and do something outside the doorknob.

I panicked when I tried to open the doorknob and it wasn’t now working. It’s locked. I’m stuck here inside the bathroom. My chest hurt as I think of what happened. They did it because I hurt Angela.

Hindi naman nila alam ang tunay na dahilan and I even tried to tell them, but they’re not listening. Masyado silang nabulag sa video na napanood nila.

“Buksan niyo ’to! Please open the door!” I shouted for them to hear me out.

Naririnig kong nagtatawanan sila sa labas kaya sumigaw pang muli ako.

“Please, open this door!” pagmamakaawa ko.

Naiiyak na akong nakahawak sa seradura ng pintuan habang pilit iyong pinipihit ng paulit ulit para bumukas pero hindi iyon gumana.

“Diya’n ka nababagay!” Dinig kong sabi ng isa sa kanila.

Then, later on, I heard their footsteps walking away. Paalis na sila at iniwan nila akong nakakulong dito sa loob ng restroom.

I need to get out of here. Dinabog ko ng dinabog ang pintuan kasabay ng malakas na pagsigaw. I tried everything for someone who could ever pass by in the restroom would hear my screams so they can help me get out.

And when I heard a group of laughter outside, I called for help again.

“Tulong! Is anybody out there? Please open the door!” Sigaw ko nang marinig ko ang grupo ng magkakaibigan na dumaan sa restroom.

“Sandali, may tao ata sa woman restroom.” Dinig kong boses iyon ng isang lalaki.

“Sino ’yon? Nakulong ata,” ani pa ng kasamahan niya.

“Pakiusap! Pakibuksan yung pintuan!” Sigaw ko pang muli nang mapansing nakuha ko ang kanilang atensyon. I’m sure they will gonna help me dahil narinig kong papunta na sila sa gawi ko.

But not when I heard someone stopped them.

“Si Blair ata ’yon. Naku, huwag na. Hayaan niyo na siya diyan na makulong.” It was now a woman’s voice.

“Kaya nga! Don’t help her. Magdusa man lang siya sa ginawa niyang pananakit kay Angela.”

Dinig ko ang mga mahihinang mga bulong at nagpanggap na umalis na sila.

“No. No. Hey! Please help me get out of here!” I then felt my eyes grew in hot as I heard deafening silence outside.

I’m tired of doing it for several times. No one can hear me. No one will try to hear me and help me to get out of here. Lahat sila ay nilagpasan lang ako nang subukan kong muli at makarinig ng dumadaan sa labas, but they just ignore my screams of help.

It’s lunchtime and most probably the students are all going to the cafeteria. Nanlulumo akong humarap sa salamin at yumuko. I then felt my tears flowed down my cheeks as I feel woeful to myself.

I used to people humiliating me. But this, I can’t.

Nag-angat naman akong muli ng tingin sa seradura ng pintuan nang mapansing gumagalaw ito. I hurriedly approached the door. And I was surprised when it suddenly opened.

My heart was pounding fast as I looked at him who now looked furious. His thick black brows were furrowed as his thin lips in a grim. While his eyes bore on me in so much worries.

Mabilis akong sumalubong kay Ace at napayakap sa kaniyang katawan. I burried my face on his chest as I still feel my hit tears on my face. Naramdaman ko namang haplusin niya ang aking uluhan at hapitin ang aking likuran.

Ilang sandali pa ay kumawala na rin ako sa kaniya at nahihiya siyang pagmasdan kaya iniwas ko ang aking mga tingin sa seryoso niyang mga mata. And I saw that behind him were Maica and Johnson who both looked worried as well.

“Blair, are you okay? Buti nalang at may nakapagsabing nakita ka nilang dito nagtungo.” Maica said worriedly to me.

Pinunasan ko naman ang mga luha kong dumaloy sa aking mukha kanina.

“I-I’m fine. Thank you for coming,” I muttered with my lips a bit trembled.

“Huwag sa akin magpasalamat. It was Ace who opened the door for you.” Nangingiting aniya sa akin kahit bakas ang lungkot sa kaniyang mga mata.

I then turned my gaze on Ace’s way. He looked worried as he glared at me when our eyes met.

“Salamat,” mahinang ani ko, sapat lang para marinig niya.

“Ayos ka lang ba? Who locked you in the bathroom?” he then asked me in a deep voice, stern and humid.

“Ayos lang, wala naman silang ginawang masama sa akin-”

“They locked you here. And that’s enough reason for me to know if who they are. Hindi iyon ayos lang sa akin, Blair.” he seriously pronounced.

He’s mad. And I’m scared for the things he can do. I don’t want to implicate him in this haywire. Even I know that he’s also one of the reasons why people are hating me more.

“Let’s go to the cafeteria first, for sure Blair is starving.” I heard Johnson inserted behind Ace.

Sabay sabay kaming nagtungo sa cafeteria. Maica told me that Clark and Sean were also worried about me. They were also looking for me. Hinahanap nila ako when Ace suddenly came here and asked them if where I am.

I bit my bottom lip while listening to what Maica was saying. Dahil halos isa’t kalahating oras din akong nakulong sa restroom.

Ace was behind me so I don’t know if he heard what we are talking about. Pumasok na kami ng cafeteria at lahat ng estudyante ay agad na sa amin nakatingin.

Nagtataka naman si Maca na humapit sa braso ko. At hindi pa man kami tuluyang nakakaupo sa table namin nang matanawan ko si Angela na naglalakad patungo sa aming gawi. And Elena was behind her.

“Ace, a-anong ginagawa mo rito?”

Napatingin naman ako kay Ace na nasa gilid ko na pala ngayon nakatayo. Lumapit siya tabi ko.

“Ace, nandito ka pala. Halika at sumabay ka na sa aming kumain.” Si Angela na may ngiting nakaguhit sa labi habang ang mga mata ay na kay Ace lang ang tingin.

“I’m here for Blair, sabay kaming maglu-lunch.” Ace replied sternly.

Nakita ko naman ang galit sa mga mata ni Angela nang marinig niya ang sinabi ni Ace. Pero bigla rin itong nagbago.

“But Ace, she hurt me yesterday. Baka saktan niya ako ulit.” Pag-arte pa nito na may natatakot na tingin sa akin ngayon, animong ano mang oras ay sasaktan ko siya.

My brows met as I looked at her in disbelief. What’s wrong with her? She’s acting too much that it ruined my image.

Lumapit siya kay Ace at saka humawak sa braso nito. All of the students are watching us. Watching how good Angela in making drama.

Some of the students even leered on me. Yumuko nalang ako at inignora ang mga tingin nila dahil masyado silang madami at lahat iyon ay mariin ang tingin sa akin.

“Ace, we don’t know what she can do. Have you watched the video? Napanood mo ba kung paano niya ’kong saktan do’n? She’s too desperate for the crown that she hurt me physically.” natatakot na aniya kay Ace.

Tumingin pa siya sa akin na para bang sasaktan ko siya ano mang oras. Nakaramdam naman ako ng pangamba at takot na baka mas paniwalaan na naman siya ni Ace ngayon kagaya ng nangyari kahapon.

“Huwag ka ngang umarteng inaapi ka Angela! We both know here na ikaw ang nauna!” biglang sinabi ni Maica sa aking tabi.

“Hoy Maica! Huwag ka ngang maki-epal sa usapan nila. Wala ka ro’n no’ng sinaktan siya ni Blair, kaya huwag mo nang ipagtanggol iyang kaibagan mo!” biglang singit ni Elena kay Maica.

Tumingin naman ako kay Ace na ngayon ay may nag-aalalang tingin kay Angela. He said to me that he believes me. Na hindi niya na kailangan pa ng aking paliwanag, kaya alam umaasa akong ako ang kakampihan niya.

“Ace, please, huwag mo na siyang lapitan-” it was Angela’s act.

“Bakit?” putol ni Ace sa sinasabi niya.

Nakita ko namang natigilan siya sa stanong ni Ace. Napalunok pa siya sa sarili niyang laway at nangapa nang sasabihin kay rito. Bumaling naman ng tingin si Ace sa akin.

Kinabahan naman agad ako nang maramdaman ang seryosong titig niya sa akin.

“K-Kasi… he likes you, and she’s not good for you! Sinaktan niya ako Ace. Masyado siyang agresibo, she hurt me dahil inaagaw raw kita sa kaniya.” Ani Angela na ngayon ay mukhang maiiyak na. Her tears were now visible in her eyes.

Napakunot naman ang noo ko ro’n.

The last time I remember, she used the crown as her reason. Ngayon naman yung pagkagusto ko kay Ace ang gagamitin niyang rason at ang pananakit kong siya rin naman ang nagsimula?

At ako? Inaagaw si Ace sa kaniya? Wow. I really can’t believe her.

“You know what Angela, wala namang katotohanan ’yang mga pinagsasasabi mo-”

Natigil ako sa pagsasalita nang may maramdaman akong bumato sa likuran ko.

“Liar! Inahas mo si Ace kay Lisa before kaya sila naghiwalay. We believed you that time pero hindi na kami maniniwala sa’yo ngayon. You are a slut!” sigaw ng isang babae mula sa isang table.

Natanawan ko naman si Sean at Clark na kadarating lang. Agad naman nila akong nilapitan. Pero mas natuon ang paningin ko sa isa pang babae na aamba nang pagbato sa akin.

Iniharang ko ang aking braso sa aking mukha.

“She’s a slut and whore!”

“Inggetera ka, Blair!”

“Mana sa amang manggagamit! Hindi makuntento sa kung anong mayroon!”

I swallowed hard. Ang sakit sa puso ng mga binibitawan nilang salita sa akin. Bumalik na naman ako sa panahong ganito ang trato nilang lahat sa akin.

I bit my lip as I put down my arms from protecting myself for the possible things that they may throw on me. At nang imulat ko ang mariin kong nakapikit na mga mata ay napatingin ako kay Ace na nakaharang na pala sa akin ngayon.

Sa kaniya ngayon tumama ang mga binabato ng ilang mga estudyante sa akin. Narinig ko namang tumigil sila sa pagbato ng mamukhaan nila kung sino ang nasa harapan kong tumatabon sa akin.

Humarap sa kanila si Ace. Magkasalubong ang dalawang makapal na kilay at madilim ang mga matang tiningnan sila.

I held his arm. I was hyperventilating when he glared at me. But I get panting when he faced the crowd with his dark piercing glares

He clenched his jaw. Mas hinigpitan ko pa ang paghawak sa kaniyang braso nang maramdamang nag-iiba na ang kaniyang galit. I wanted him to calm down even I know that he’s just protecting me.

At kalaunan ay mabilis niyang hinawakan niya ang kamay ko at saka hinila palabas ng cafeteria. I didn’t expect that but I just let myself go with him outside. Leaving the crowd while his hands holding on to me tightly.

Kabanata 22

Kabanata 22

Courting

“Where are we going?” tanong ko kay Ace na kakapasok lang sa loob ng sasakyan niya.

“Restaurant. Doon nalang tayo mag lunch.”

Pinaandar na niya ang sasakyan at hindi na ako nagsalita. I didn’t know that the students can make things like that when they are mad.

Nasaktan ko ngang tunay si Angela at siya ang kinakampihan nila. Hinusgahan nila ako gaya ng dati. They even called me slut and whore. Akala ko ay magiging maayos na ang trato nila sa akin, but in just a glimpse, Angela ruined it all.

Elena and Angela detract me.

Hindi ko naman kailangan ng mga papuri at suporta nila. All I want is their kindness to me. I want them to treat me better. Approach me normally. Be kind to me. I just want to be a normal student who just only wants to have friends.

“What are you thinking?”

Tumingin ako kay Ace na ngayon ay nakatuon ang paningin sa kalsada. Napasulyap pa siya sa akin saglit.

I sighed. Ace is always protecting me. He’s always true to his words. He never fails in protecting me. Kahit na dapat ay wala siya sa eskwelahan namin kanina ay nagpunta pa rin siya.

Ngayon ko lang napagtanto kung bakit nga ba siya nasa school namin. He said to me yesterday that he’ll pick me up. Pero hindi pa naman uwian.

“Don’t worry about them, hindi ka na nila pwedeng guluhin.” he seriously said.

My forehead creased. I know that their family is so influential, but what can he do in this situation? He said that as if he had already found a solution.

“Sabihin mo sa’kin kapag may ginawa sila ulit sa’yo.”

I bit my lower lip. I feel like I’m in my primary days but no one ever tells me this kind of protectiveness.

“Thank you,” I sincerely muttered to him.

I felt my chest tighten as I took a glance at him.

“You’re always saving me. Alam kong kaibigan mo si Angela but please don’t believe her.”

“I said it already to you, Blair. That I believe you no matter what.”

“Napanood mo ba ’yung video? They all think that I’m desperate for you.”

“Yes, pero alam ko naman ang totoong nangyari, so I don’t buy her reasons.”

He knows what really happened? How? Hindi ko naman naipaliwanag sa kaniya ang nangyari kahapon.

“And I know how much you aren’t that desperate to me. You just only admit yesterday that you liked me, so you’re not that desperate.”

Agad naman akong napalingon sa gawi niya. My lips parted as I glance at him.

This man is taking it all lightly! Kung tutuusin nga ay ang mga babae niya ang nanggagambala sa buhay ko.

“What?” I then asked him like I didn’t hear what he just said.

“You heard it,” he spoke with a hidden smirk on his lips.

“Ace, seriously? Your woman is disturbing me. Kaya ngayon ako ’yung pinag iinitan sa school.” malungkot na sabi ko sa kaniya.

“Woman?”

Napa-buntong hininga na lang ako.

So hindi niya pala alam na may gusto sa kaniya si Angela? At hindi lang siya kundi marami pang nagkakagusto sa kaniya.

“Angela liked you. Kaya niya ako ginaganito dahil akala niya ay maaagaw kita sa kaniya.”

“Hindi mo naman ako maaagaw sa kaniya. Because I was yours since before.”

Then suddenly I felt my heart thumped that beaten me loudly. I feel my cheeks flushed and heatedas I get away from his way.

Napaiwas naman ako nang tingin sa kaniya dahil sa pamumula ng aking pisngi. Nahihiya akong makita niya ako sa ganoong ayos. This was his effect on me. Paniguradong hindi lang sa akin kung hindi pati na rin sa iba pang mga kababaihan.

Huminto ang sasakyan namin sa tapat ng isang restaurant. Humarap naman ako sa kaniya at nagtatakang tumingin.

“Let’s go, I don’t want you to be late for your next class.” He then muttered.

Lumabas na kaming pareha ng sasakyan. We went inside the restaurant and I noticed the people inside.

The girls are looking at him when we come in. Napapalingon pa ang ibang mga babaeng nasa sarili nilang table. Yes, they are all turning their gaze to him.

The restaurant was high-end and all of them are wearing formal attire. May ilang naka coat and tie pa nang mapansin ko iyon. Kaya naman ay bigla akong napatingin sa uniform na suot ko.

Is it okay that I’m wearing this here?

Nagulat naman ako nang maramdaman ang kamay ni Ace na humawak sa kamay ko. This is not the first time he held my hand but it always surprised me.

There’s an electrifying feeling the moment he held it. Bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko habang sabay kaming naglakad patungo sa lamesang inihanda para sa amin.

Ipinaghila pa niya ako ng upuan para sa akin. Ngumiti naman ako sa kaniya at saka ako naupo. Hindi ako makapaniwalang nandito kami ngayon ni Ace at sabay na kakain ng pananghalian.

It looks like we’re dating. I don’t want to assume that it is. Nagkataon lang naman na dito kami kumain ngayon dahil sa nangyari kanina sa cafeteria.

Naupo na siya sa aking harapan at nakita kong nagtawag ng waiter. Hinawakan ko naman agad ang menu na nasa table namin.

Sinabi ko ang napili ko at gano’n din naman siya. Umalis din agad ang waiter at habang naghihintay ay napatingin ako sa kaniya.

“Hindi kaya ako ma-late dahil dito pa tayo kumain?” tanong ko sa kaniya.

At naalala kong baka may klase rin siya at nandito pa siya, sinasamahan akong mag-lunch.

“Hindi naman, malapit lang ’to sa school niyo.”

“I-Ikaw? You have your classes today. Baka late ka na?” Tanong ko.

He shook his head seriously.

“Nope, mamaya pa ang next class ko sa isang subject. Don’t worry,”

Nakahinga naman ako ng maluwag dahil mamaya pa naman pala ang next class niya. Nakita ko naman ang mga nasa likuran niyang grupo ng kababaihang nakatingin sa aming gawi. Kahit sa ibang table ay may tumitingin din sa kaniya.

Well, he’s known and he’s like a Greek god. So, who wouldn’t dare to look at him in awe? Kahit ako ay hindi maiwasang hangaan ang kaniyang mukha at pangangatawan.

Naramdaman ko namang biglang mag-init ang pisngi ko dahil sa naisip. Yumuko pa ako ng bahagya para hindi niya ito mapansin.

“Uhm Ace, bathroom lang muna ako.” paalam ko sa kaniya.

He just nods at me so I immediately walked towards the bathroom. Mabilis ko namang nakita kung nasaan ang restroom ng resto. Pumasok ako ron at naabutan ang ilang kababaihang nag-uusap habang nag-aayos sa kanilang sarili.

Ako naman ay lumapit sa salamin at tiningnan ang aking sarili. I washed my hand.

“Si Ace ba ’yong nasa labas?”

Halos matigilan pa ako nang marinig ang pinag-uusapan ng dalawa.

“Oo siya ’yon. My god! He’s so hot in person! Mag-isa lang ba siya? Nakita ko kasing mag-isa siya sa table?”

I heard them talking about Ace. Kadarating lang ng ibang kausap nila at  ’yun agad ang napansin.

Hindi na ako nagtakang kilala nila si Ace. Sa yaman ba naman nila ay halos lahat na yata ng pamilya sa industriya ay nagkakandarapa sa kaniya. And these girls are matured. Ito ’yong tipo ni Ace. An hourglass body.

Siguro ay nasa college na ang mga ito kaya madalas rin nila siyang makita.

“Wait, bakit hindi niya kasama si Lisa? Break naba sila?”

Napatigil ako sa pagkuha ng tissue nang marinig ko ang pangalang binanggit ng isang babae malapit sa aking tabi.

“Hindi siguro. Baka busy lang si Lisa kaya si Ace lang ngayon ang mag-isang pumunta rito.”

“Sa bagay, lagi naman sila rito kaya baka nga busy lang si Lisa.”

Tumalikod na ako at umalis na. Hindi ko alam kung bakit may kirot akong naramdaman nang marinig ko ang pinag-uusapan nila.

Si Lisa at Ace madalas dito na pumunta? Are there in a relationship? But how? Ace said to me that he has his girl. And he didn’t say to me if who is she.

Maybe it’s still Lisa. Dati pa lang naman ay sila na. At baka ngayon sila pa rin.

But Ace admits that he likes me. Is it just a lie?

“Blair, take your sit. Sakto lang ang balik mo, the food is served.” sabi ni Ace habang nakangiting nakatingin sa akin.

Naupo naman ako at inalis ang mga narinig kong usapan kanina sa bathroom na maglaro sa isipan ko iyon.

Ace believes me no matter what. Kaya dapat ay magtiwala rin ako sa kaniya. He always true to his words so why would I doubt him now?

Kumain na kami at hindi ko na nagawa pang magsalita. Tahimik lang din siyang kumakain. Minsan nararamdamn ko siyang nakatitig sa akin pero hindi ko nalang binibigyang pansin.

I need to believe him. And that’s what should I do. At isa pa, hindi ko naman siya boyfriend kaya wala akong karapatang pagdudahan siya.

He only said that he likes me. Hanggang gusto lang at hindi para sa pakikipag relasyon. Paghanga lang naman itong nararamdaman ko sa kaniya at gayundin naman siguro siya.

Palabas na kami ngayon ng restaurant nang may biglang bumati sa kaniya.

“Ace! You’re here. Buti at naabutan kita, pinapasabi ni Lisa na bukas n’yo na lang daw gawin.” the girl said at him.

Napatingin naman ako kay Ace.

“Okay, tell her na maghihintay ako.”

Ngumiti sa kaniya ang babae.

“Sigi, sasabihin ko. Mauuna na rin ako.” napabaling pa ang tingin nito sa aking gawi bago tuluyang umalis na ito at tinalikuran kami.

I sighed. I bit my bottom lip as I looked away. Naglalakad na rin kami patungong sasakyan niya ngayon at hindi ko maiwasang hindi isipin ang nangyari kanina sa loob.

“Hey, ang tahimik mo simula kanina. Is there something wrong?” nag-aalalang tanong nito sa akin nang makapasok kami sa loob ng sasakyan niya.

“W-Wala naman. Ganito lang talaga ako.”

Tinitigan niya muna ako saglit, ani mong naninimbang. At saka ko siya narinig na mahinang bumuntong-hininga bago pinaandar ang sasakyan.

“I’ll pick you up later,” he then said after a long silence.

“Okay,” tanging ani ko sa kaniya.

“Tell me, what’s in your mind.” nag-aalalang aniya pa kalaunan.

Natitigilan naman akong napatingin sa kaniya. I swallowed hard. He really noticed my silence and now he’s curious.

“H-Huh? W-Wala naman. Salamat pala sa lunch.” pag-iba ko ng usapan.

“No problem. Sabay na tayo lagi mag lunch,”

Nagulat naman ako ng sinabi niya ’yon.

“Hindi naman na kailangan, I know you’re also busy. Saka baka may kailangan ka pang gawin sa school niyo.”

He looked at me. He gave me a handsome smile that makes my heart fluttered.

“Okay then, pag hindi hectic ang schedule ko ay magsa-sabay tayo.”

Nakangiti na ako ngayon habang nakatingin sa kaniya. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ako makapaniwala sa mga nangyayari. Kung dati ay natatanaw ko lang siyang seryosong nakatingin sa akin sa malayo. At ngayon naman ay nasa harapan ko na siya.

His jaw-dropping looks make me tremble. But at the same time, my heart never stops in beating so loud, every time I know he’s just around.

“Mauna na ako, ingat ka sa pagmamaneho.” nakangiti kong sabi sa kaniya.

Ibinaba niya ako rito sa parking ng lot school.

“Ihahatid na muna kita sa classroom mo.” Iginiit pa niya.

“Hindi na. Baka ma-late ka pa sa klase mo.”

“Ihahatid na muna kita-”

“No need Ace, sigi na. Ayoko ring mahuli ka sa klase mo.” Ani ko nang mukhang hindi talaga siya papayag na hindi ako maihatid sa classroom ko.

Then when he eyed me weakly. I get that as the sigh that he agrees.

“Okay, bye. Take care,”

I waved my hand at him at umalis na. Pumasok na ako ng classroom at lahat sila ay napatingin sa akin. I didn’t mind their glares at me. Umupo ako sa tabi ni Maica.

“Saan kayo nagpunta ni Ace? And what is that walked out effect? Hindi ko alam na close pala kayo ah.”

Tumingin naman ako sa kaniya.

“Sa restau-” she cutted me off instantly.

“Nag-date kayo?!” Eksaheradang aniya.

Agad ko naman siyang pinanlakihan ng mata.

“No, it’s just a normal lunch. At saka dito naman talaga dapat kami kakain hindi ba?”

Hindi pa rin siya tumigil sa panunuksong tingin na ibinibigay niya sa akin.

“Hmm, meron kang hindi sinasabi sa’kin” nanliliit ang mga mata nitong tumingin sa akin ngayon.

I don’t know what to tell her. Nahinto lang ang mapanuksong tingin niya nang dumating na ang next teacher namin.

Natapos ang klase namin sa maghapon at napansin kong nakatingin ang iba kong kaklase sa akin gawi. They are not talking about me anymore but their glares were intense. It was more than piercing than it was earlier.

“Let’s go, Blair, hinihintay na tayo nila Sean sa labas.” napatingin ako sa labas ng classroom at nakita kong nando’n nga ang mga ito.

Lumabas na kami at isa isa silang lumapit sa akin.

“Blair, ihahatid na kita sa inyo.” prisinta ni Clark na nasa tabi ni Sean.

“Hatid ka na namin Blair. Baka mamaya biglang harangin ka nila at wala kami. Mas mabuti ng safe ka.” nag-aalalang tugon ni Sean sa akin.

Napatingin naman ako sa kanila. Hindi ko alam kung paano sasabihing susunduin ako ni Ace.

“Hindi na kailangan, susunduin siya ni Ace.” Johnson suddenly spoke.

Nagugulat naman akong napatingin sa kaniya. Napansin ko rin ang gulat sa mata ng mga kaibigan ko.

“Susunduin ka niya?” tanong ni Sean sa akin pagkaraan.

“A-Ah, e’ oo.”

“Mabuti na rin ’yon para hindi ka lapitan nila Elena at Angela.” ani Maica sa aking tabi.

“Hindi ba mas maganda kung huwag ka munang sumama kay Ace? Kasi the more na nakikita kang kasama siya mas lalo ka nilang mapapansin.” Suhestiyon naman ni Sean.

“Ang sabihin mo, gusto mo lang na ikaw ang maghatid kay Blair at hindi si Ace.” sabad naman ni Maica rito.

Hindi makapaniwalang tiningnan naman siya ni Sean.

“You know what, halina kayo. For sure naghihintay na ’yun don.” Putol ni Johnson sa tinginan ng bawat isa.

Tumingin pa ito sa akin habang sinasabi niya iyon. Jhonson and Clark were also in their college as well pero pumupunta pa rin sila dito minsan. Bihira nalang din kaya nakakatuwa na makita ko silang dalawa ngayon.

“Lez go! Naghihintay na si Papa Ace!” tukso pa ni Maica sa akin na mabilis kong binalingan ng tingin para itikom ang bibig.

Tahimik naman kaming nakarating sa parking lot. Hindi na naman umimik pa si Clark at Sean.

“Oh, ayan na pala si Papa Ace!” hirit ni Maica nang maabutan namin si Ace na nakasandig sa gilid ng kaniyang sasakyan.

Kinakabahan naman akong napatingin sa lalaking nakasandal sa itim sasakyan niya. Agaw pansin ang mamahaling sasakyan nito sa parking lot. I bit my lip as I watched him approaching me now.

Impit namang napatili si Maica sa aking tabi.

“Tsh,” narinig kong singhal ni Clark.

“Hey bro!” bati ni Johnson nang makalapit si Ace sa amin.

Tinanguan naman siya ni Ace.

“Let’s go?” Agad niyang ani sa akin.

“Oh my gosh!” tili pang muli Maica sa tabi ko.

Napakagat nalang ako sa labi habang pinamumulahan ng pisngi. Nagpaalam na muna ako sa kanila bago tuluyang umalis at sumakay sa loob ng sasakyan ni Ace.

“Ingat ka Blair ah!” makahulugang ani Maica. Napailing nalang ako.

“May nanggulo ba sayo kanina?” Ace asked me while he’s driving.

“Wala naman na.”

Nakita ko namang bahagya siyang ngumiti. Napaiwas nalang ako ng tingin.

“Pwede ba tayong magdinner tomorrow? Ipapaalam kita sa Dad mo.”

Nagugulat naman akong timingin sa kaniya. Nakatulala akong nakatitig sa gawi niya ngayon. Hindi makapaniwala sa sinabi niya. Are we going to date-?

“But, if you don’t want it’s okay. Maybe next time?”

I gulped before I answered.

“No. I mean, yeah I’ll go with you tomorrow.” I stutteringly answer.

Nakita ko namang umigting ang panga niya.

“I don’t want to pressure you, Blair,” he said nonchalantly.

I swallowed hard when I turned to him.

What does he mean? Pressure me in what?

“Ihahatid na kita sa loob. May importante rin akong sasabihin sa kaniya.”

He parked his car outside our house. Tumango nalang ako at pinagbuksan niya ako ng pinto kalaunan nang mauna siyang lumabas sa akin.

Sabay naming tinungo ang bahay.

“Oh, Ace! Ikaw pala ang sumundo kay Blair.” Biglang bungad ni Mommy sa aming dalawa nang makapasok kami.

Ngumiti naman si Ace.

“Yes po, Tita. I also want to talk to Tito,” he politely said.

“Nasa study room siya, do’n mo nalang puntahan. Dito ka na rin mag dinner hijo.”

“Sigi po,” sabay na kaming umakyat ni Ace sa pangalawang palapag ng bahay namin.

Napansin ko naman ang nakasunod na tingin ni Mommy sa aming dalawa. Kaya inunahan ko si Ace sa paglalakad, pero itong si Ace ay bigla akong hinawakan sa braso.

“Huwag kang magmadali, baka madulas ka sa hagdan.” nag-aalalang aniya sa akin.

I bit my bottom lip as I looked at him. My heart is beating so fast. Natauhan lang ako nang marinig kong tumikhim si Mommy sa ibaba na nakatingin pa rin pala sa aming dalawa.

Agad kong hinaltak ang kamay ko sa pagkakahawak ni Ace, dahil nakatingin si Mommy sa amin. Ace was a bit shocked when I pulled my arm on him.

Nauna na akong naglakad at agad na tinungo ang aking kwarto.

I didn’t say anything to Ace before I got here. I know it was rude of me to just go here without saying any word. I sighed. Walang namamagitan sa amin ni Ace. And I know that he liked me but he never says that he loves me.

He didn’t say that he wants to be my boyfriend, he just only admits that he likes me. But I can’t help his actions. The way he cares for me.

Mom can notice it if he’ll continue his actions this way in our house.

I like him and I don’t think that I love him. But after all, this happened, I’m falling for him. But I don’t think if he feels the same way.

Nagpalit na ako ng damit at saka ako lumabas ng aking silid. Bumaba na rin ako pagkaraan at tinungo ang dining room at naabutan silang nag-uusap ni Dad sa hapag kainan ngayon. The food was already served.

“Oh, is that it? Hindi ka sasama sa family mo? Bakit naman hijo? If you’re worried about your pending works it’s okay with me. Join your family and take the vacation.” ani Dad.

Napatingin naman ako kay Ace na ngayon ay nasa akin din ang mga tingin.

“It’s not only my reason Tito. May iba rin po kasi akong aasikasuhin, kaya baka dito nalang din ako magki-Christmas. And I also often go to the U.S. So I want to experience the Christmas Eve and New Year here.” Aniya kay Dad habang ang mga tingin ay nasa akin nakatutok.

Inumpisahan ko naman na ang pagkain. Mom was beside me. Napansin kong hinuhuli niya ang tingin ko.

“Baka naman babae ’yang rason mo hijo? Nako, sa gandang lalaki mong ’yan hindi malabong may girlfriend ka na.” Dad said then gave a hearty laugh.

I suddenly lifted my eyes on Ace.

“I don’t have a girlfriend… yet,”

“Tsk, sa gandang lalaki natin wala ka pang girlfriend? Kahit man lang ba nililigawan, wala ba?” Dad curiously asked.

“Clarence, huwag mo nang usisain si Ace. You see, he’s busy in school and with the works he needs to submit to you. Pagpasensyahan mo na itong asawa ko hijo.” Si Mom.

“Okay, lang po, meron po akong nililigawan ngayon, hindi ko lang alam at sigurado kung sasagutin niya ako,”

Namilog naman ng bahagya ang mata ko nang marinig ang sinabi niya. Hindi ko pinahalata dahil nasa akin ang mga mata niya nakatingin.

May nililigawan na siya? Sino? Maybe he’s courting Lisa?

Then I remember the girls at the restaurant earlier. Hindi kaya si Lisa yung nililigawan niya? I felt my heart sank in that thought. Sumisikip ang dibdib ko na para bang nahihirapan ako sa paghinga nang maisip ko iyon.

It’s possible. They are in the same school. And Lisa was her past, kaya hindi malabong balikan niya ’yon.

Nakita ko naman siyang tumingin sa akin muli mula kay Dad. But looked away this time.

“Hmm, I know that you can win her heart.” Dad then told seriously at Ace.

Nararamdaman ko naman ang tingin sa akin ni Ace habang kausap niya ang aking ama.

“Yeah, hopefully, Tito.”

I sipped on the glass in front of me. He never says that he wants to be my boyfriend. And I know that he only likes me. Kaya sana nga ay sagutin siya ng babaeng nililigawan niya.

Napabuntong hininga nalang ako at hindi na sila pinakinggan. Natapos ang dinner at hinatid ko si Ace sa labas.

Mom and Dad were busy with the company, at may kailangan pa daw silang asikasuhin. Nagtungo sila ng office ni Dad sa tabi lang rin ng study room namin.

Nasa labas na kami ni Ace ng bahay para ihatid siya nang binalingan niya alo ng tingin.

“Is there something wrong?”

Hindi naman ako tumingin sa kaniya at nag-iwas nalang nang tingin.

“Hey, why are you ignoring me?” malambing na tanong na nito sa’kin ngayon.

Bumilis naman bigla sa pagtibok itong puso kong naghuhuramentado na. His voice was subtle and husky at the same time when he said it. I swallowed hard before I took a glance at him.

“W-Wala naman,”

“Tell me, hindi ako aalis hangga’t hindi mo sinasabi sa akin kung ano ’yang iniisip mo.” Lumapit siya sa akin.

Napansin ko naman agad ang pagitan naming dalawa. Ilang dipa na lamang ito sa isa’t isa. I smell his manly expensive perfume. Pinigil ko naman ang paghinga nang lumapit pa siyang muli sa akin.

“Tell me,” he huskily uttered while his eyes directly on me.

Tumingin ako sa kaniya at nakita ang nangungusap niyang mga mata. His grey eyes were looked so worried and hopeful as they glanced into me. Hindi ko alam kung sasabihin ko ba itong bumabagabag sa akin o sasarilihin ko nalang.

I don’t have the right to ask him about it. Pero hindi naman ako mapakali sa isipang may nililigawan siyang iba. I sighed. I wanted to know it. Hinarap ko siya at diretsong tiningnan sa mga mata.

Ang bilis nang tibok ng puso ko habang nagtititigan kami. He licked his red luscious lips. Napatingin naman ako ron.

I felt my throat dried.

“Y-You said, you’re courting someone,” kinakabahang sabi ko.

“Yeah, what’s about it?” he asked me in a deep voice.

Ang lapit na namin sa isa’t isa. Pakiramdam ko ay lalagutan ako ng hininga dahil sa sobrang lapit ng katawan niya sa akin. Naririnig ko rin ang malakas na pagkabog ng puso ko. I’m worried if he also hears it.

“S-Sino?” I then inquired curiously stuttered.

“Oh…so you didn’t know?” mahinang aniya pa.

Nakakalasing ang boses na ginagamit niya ngayon.

“Know what?”

“That I’m courting you,” his eyes were a bit dark as he looked at me this time.

I saw how he clenched his jaw. Oh, god. Hindi ko inasahan ang sinabi niya. Is it real? Am I dreaming? He said that he’s courting me. I couldn’t believe that he says it.

Ang akala ko ay may iba siyang nililigawan at hindi ko inaasahang magiging ako pala ’yun. And all he said in the dining, was all about me?

Ang bilis nang kabog ng dibdib ko habang nakatingin sa kaniya. I wish this was all real. And if it wasn’t a dream, please don’t wake me up that fast. I still want to enjoy this moment for a while.

Kabanata 23

Kabanata 23

Kiss

Hindi ko mapigilan ang tuwang umaapaw sa puso ko. It’s like a glass filling with water and the water could not stop from running and it’s now overflowing.

It wasn’t cold actually. It feels warm as I looked at him straight in the eye. My heart is still flattered in knowing that he’s courting me.

Nagha-handa ako ngayon para sa dinner date namin ngayong gabi. Walang pasok ngayon and I were here in our house the whole day.

Walang oras, minuto at segundo na hindi nawaglit sa isipan ko kung gaano kasaya ang gabing darating. I was combing my hair when I heard my phone beeped.

Kinuha ko ito sa tabi ng pursed ko na nasa ibabaw ng table. I saw an unknown number.

Binuksan ko naman ito at binasa.

Unknown number:

Hey, it’s Ace. Please save my number.

Malakas na kumalabog naman ang puso ko nang mabasa ko ang kaniyang mensahe. Where did he get my number?

Nanginginig pa ang kamay kong isinave ang numero niya sa aking contacts. I bit my lip as I think of what should I reply to him.

Walang pumapasok sa isip ko kung ano ba ang pwede kong sabihin sa kaniya. I just only felt happy and nervous at the moment.

Ako:

Okay :)

Napatili naman ako ng bahagya nang ma-hit ko ang send button. Pakiramdam ko ay pulang pula na ang pisngi ko habang tinitingnan ang mensaheng isinend ko sa kaniya.

I put down my phone at the table. At saka ako humarap sa salaming nasa harapan ko. I was wearing a classy and elegant blush pink, short sleeves ruffled dress.  

Hindi na ako makapag hintay na makita siya mamaya. I’m still nervous when I see him. Pero saya ang dulot niyon sa akin. I smiled when I finished brushing my hair.

Napabaling naman ako nang tingin sa lamesa kung saan ko naibaba ang aking cellphone. Kinuha ko ito at nakita ang mensahe muli ni Ace.

Ace:

Are you ready? I can’t wait to see you.

I smiled when I read his text.                           

Ako:

Yep, see you later.

Tumayo na ako at kinuha ang pursed, at saka lumabas na ng silid ko. Naabutan ko si Mom na nakaupo sa salas.

“You’re so beautiful, Blair. I liked your dress. Bagay na bagay sa’yo, hija.”

Nginitian ko naman si Mommy.

“Thanks, Mom,”

“Papunta na ba si Ace?”

Nai-paalam na ako ni Ace sa kanila kaninang umaga nang magtungo siya rito. Nalaman ko nalang nang tanungin ako ni Daddy kung anong oras daw kaming aalis.

Hiyang hiya pa ako at hindi alam ang sasabihin sa kanila nang malaman nila iyon. Hindi naman sila nagtanong kung anong gagawin namin at kung saan kami pupunta. At kung ano ang namamagitan sa aming dalawa.

“Hindi pa po-”

“Oh, ayan na pala siya.” biglang ani Mommy na hindi ko inasahan.

Naramdaman ko namang nanigas ang mga binti ko sa kinatatayuan ko. Nakaharap sa akin si Mommy at nakatingin siya sa likuran ko ngayon.

I swallowed hard as I shut my eyes. Dumilat din naman ako agad nang marinig ko ang mababa ngunit malaki nitong boses.

“Good evening po,” he politely said to my Mom.

“Magandang gabi rin. Aalis na ba kayo?”

“Yes, po. Magpapaalam lang po muna ako sa inyo at sa kay Tito.”

Bumilis naman sa paghuhuramentado itong puso ko. He did not text me that he’s already here! Nananatili akonh nakatalikod sa kaniya at hindi pa rin siya hinaharap.

“Tatawagin ko lang si Clarence. Oh Blair, Ace is here. Bakit ayaw mo siyang harapin?” Si Mom nang mapansing hindi ko pa siya hinaharap.

Simpleng tanong lang naman ang sinabi ni Mommy sa akin, pero ba’t parang naramdaman ko ang panunukso sa tinig niya. Nagugulat naman akong tumingin kay Mom. Nginitian lang niya ako at saka umalis na patungong hagdan.

“Turn around, I wanna see you.” his deep husky voice uttered.

Napalunok naman ako ng maramdaman ang panunuyo ng aking lalamunan. I heard him walked towards me. Kinakabahan naman ako at hindi na alam ang gagawin. Nahihiya akong humarap sa kaniya.

At nang maramdaman kong tumigil na siya sa paglalakad ay agad naman akong humarap sa kaniya. My eyes widened as I looked at him in the eyes.

He’s so near to me. I felt his hand held my arms.

Muntikan na akong matumba pagkaharap ko sa kaniya, but then, he hurriedly held my waist.

Ang bilis ng tibok ng aking puso habang nagtititigan kaming dalawa. He licked his lower lip and clenched his jaw. Napatingin naman ako ro’n.

“Ace, hijo andito ka na pala,” narinig ko ang boses ni Daddy na nagsalita sa likuran ko.

Agad naman akong humiwalay sa pagkakahawak ni Ace sa akin dahil masyado kaming malapit sa isa’t isa. Hindi ko maiwasang pamulahan ng pisngi nang maamoy ko ang kanyang mabangong amoy.

Natauhan lang ako nang makita ko si Dad na lumapit sa banda namin. Kinakabahan naman akong humarap sa kaniya. Hindi kaya nakita niya kami ni Ace kanina? Natatakot akong magalit siya kay Ace dahil lang don.

Dad is a bit strict to me when it comes to the boys, especially if there have feelings for me. One of the reasons kaya hindi ako nagpapaligaw sa school.

“Sir, magandang gabi po.”

Nakangiti naman si Daddy habang nakatingin kay Ace. Mukhang hindi naman niya kami nakita kaya nakahinga ako ng maluwag.

Nang matapos kaming makapagpaalam kila Mom and Dad ay umalis na rin kami at tinungo ang kaniyang sasakyan.

“You’re so beautiful,”

Napatingin naman ako kay Ace nang marinig kong sinabi niya ’yon. Hindi magkamayaw sa pagkabog itong puso ko habang nakatitig ako sa abong mga mata niya.

“T-Thank you,” nauutal kong sabi.

“Damn,” he then murmured.

Napakagat labi naman ako. Hininto niya ang sasakyan sa isang hotel. It’s not their hotel but it’s also luxurious.

We go to the restaurant of the hotel. Nasa entrada pa lamang kami ay nakita ko na agad ang mga matang nakamasid sa amin.

Hindi ko naman maiwasan makita ang paghanga sa tingin ng ibang kababaihan kay Ace. Napatingin naman ako sa kaniya nang maramdaman kong hawakan niya ako sa braso.

At nakita ko naman ang dismaya sa mata ng mga kababaihang nasa amin ang tingin. Pumasok kami ng elevator at hindi ko nakita kung anong floor kami aakyat.

Nabaling ang atensiyon ko kay Ace na ngayon ay deretsong nakatayo sa tabi ko at nakahawak sa kaniyang cellphone.

Hindi ko na ’yun tiningnan pa. Bumukas ang elevator at nakita kong isa rin ito sa resto ng hotel.

Elegante at mamahalin ang parte na ito ng hotel. As I looked on the tables, the setup, and the people here. They are all wearing their formal wear. Nakita ko namang may lumapit sa amin.

The waiter approached and guides us to our dining table. Tinahak namin ang bandang dulo at pinagbuksan kami ng glass door.

Nagtaka naman ako nang mapansing nasa labas iyon.

At natigilan ako nang makita ang isang enggrandeng lamesa na nakahanda para sa aming dalawa nang makalabas kami ng pintuan.

Nasa labas ang puwesto namin kung saan kita ang isang hindi kalakihang swimming pool na ang hangganan ay ang dulo ng palapag na ito.

It was a breathtaking view as I amazingly roamed my eyes over the dark sky. May mga lanterns na nakapalibot sa taas niyon.

We’re on the top floor! And it’s unique to have this kind of setup here. I thought it’s in outside, but it’s just an open side.

May red carpet ding nakalatag patungo sa table namin. The scented candles on our table makes it more romantic and intimate.

Madilim ang gawi namin pero naliliwanagan ito ng mga kandila at lanterns na nakapalibot sa amin ngayon. Kita rin ang ganda ng city lights kaya nakakamanghang pagmasdan ang mga ito. Hindi naman ako makapaniwalang tumingin kay Ace.

Nagulat ako nang iabot pa niya sa akin ang isang bungkos ng bulaklak.

“T-Thank you,” I stuttered. Amazed that I didn’t notice it.

Naramdaman ko naman ang panginginig ng mga binti ko nang alalayan niya akong maglakad patungo sa dining table namin.

My heart raced as I roam my eyes in this place. Did he make this all? Nagkalat ang mga rose petals sa aming lamesa at gayundin sa carpeted floor na part ng table namin.

Marami rin akong nakitang pagkain na nakahanda para sa aming dalawa.

Napaangat ako ng tingin sa kaniya. He looked at me and gave me a boyish smile. Lumapit siya sa isang upuan at hinila iyon para sa akin. Naupo naman ako roon. Nakita ko pa siyang bumaling sa gilid namin na gawing madilim nang makaupo kaming pareho.

He snapped his hand. Nagtaka naman ako sa ginawa niya. At nagulat nang biglang may tumugtog ng violin doon.

Unti unting nagkaroon ng liwanag ang gawi ng mga musikerong tumutugtog para sa amin. Nanikip naman ang dibdib ko nang matanto kung gaano ka-espesyal at kaengrande itong dinner namin.

It’s so intimate and I can’t help but to looked at him in surprise. Hindi ko alam na ganito pala ang dinner na hinanda niya para sa akin. Dahil ang inaasahan ko lang naman ay isang simpleng dinner sa isang restaurant na kasama siya. Pero yung ganito kagarbo at talagang nakakabigla ay nakakataba ng puso.

Slowly, I felt my eyes watered. Hindi ko na namalayan ang pagdaloy ng luha ko sa aking pisngi. Diretso lang siyang nakatingin sa akin at nang makita akong naluluha ay agad niya akong dinaluhan.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” nag-aalalang tanong niya.

Nakaramdam naman ako ng hiya nang daluhan niya pa ako.

“Y-You prepare all of this?” alinlangang tanong ko. But my curiosity about all of this is eating me.

Pinunasan naman niya ang luhang namalisbis sa aking pisngi.

“Yeah, I want to give you a very memorable first date.” mahinang aniya sa aking tainga.

Ang lapit ng mukha namin sa isa’t isa. Dama ko na ang bawat paghinga niya sa aking leeg. Hinawi niya ang ilang hibla ng buhok kong nakatakas at isinabit iyon sa likuran ng aking tainga.

“This is your first date, right?” He hoarsely asked.

“Yes,” mahinang ani ko.

“Then let’s make it special.”

I bit my lip as I glanced at him. The music blends into the loud beating of my heart. Bumalik na siya sa kaniyang upuan. I put the bouquet of flowers on the side of our table.

This place and the moment are so romantic. It feels nostalgic and very special to remember.

Then I take a look at the food on our table. The first course is served.

“Let’s eat, may ipapakita ako sa’yo pagkatapos nating kumain.” nakangiting aniya.

“Meron pa?” Hindi makapaniwalang tanong ko sa kaniya.

Lahat ng ito ay masasabi kong sobra na and now he’s saying that he has something to show more.

“Yeah, so let’s finish this first.”

I smiled at him.

Nang mai-serve na ang main course ay nakita ko namang sinalinan niya ako ng red wine. He only put a small amount of it in my wine glass.

“Just drink a little, your still a kid. Bawal pa ’yan sayo kaya konti lang muna.” then he chuckled hoarsely.

Napamaang naman akong tumingin sa kaniya.

“Really? If I’m a kid then you’re old.”

He suddenly looked at me.

Kita ko ang gulat sa mga mata niya nang marinig niya ang sinabi ko. Kinabahan naman ako dahil baka hindi niya nagustuhan ang aking sinabi. I rarely joked with someone and I just learned it from him.

“Uh-huh, well, I’m just a college and you’re in senior high school. Konti lang naman ang agwat natin.”

I bit my lower lip. Nagpipigil ng tawa dahil mukhang sineryoso niya ang sinabi ko.

“What, are you going to laugh at me?” Nagtatakang aniya sa akin nang mapansin ang aking pagpipigil.

Umiling naman ako. Nanliliit ang matang tumingin siya sa akin. Natigil lang ang titigan namin nang i-serve na nila ang dessert.

I like their foods here but it all looks expensive. Well, what am I going to expect from him? He can pay it all with no sweat. Ilang araw pa lang niya akong nililigawan at wala pang linggo ganito na agad siyang manurpresa.

Hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin ako makapaniwalang nililigawan niya na talaga ako. And now we’re here in a romantic place he’d prepared for me.

“Let’s go?” Tumayo siya at inilahad sa akin ang isang kamay.

Napatingin naman ako ron at saka nakangiting tinanggap. Dinala niya ako sa kabilang side ng pool kung saan kaming dalawa lang. Tanaw ang kalakhan ng syudad.

Tuloy pa rin sa pagtugtog ang dalawang musikero kahit na umalis na kami ng aming lamesa. I can hear the music they made here in our place. Nakatingin kami sa maliwanag na paligid at tinitingnan ang ganda ng city lights at skyscrapers.

He’s beside me. Medyo mahangin kaya tinatangay ang ilang hibla ng buhok ko.

Kalaunan ay umusad siya at lumapit sa akin.

“Salamat sa dinner. It was wonderful.” mahinang sinabi ko sa kaniya.

Seryoso naman ang mga matang nakatitig siya sa akin.

“I’m glad you like it,”

“I love it, and it was one of the best dinners I have.” pag-amin ko.

Tipid naman siyang ngumiti sa akin. His small smile makes my heart jumped. I looked at his shoulder to shift my attention.

Nakita ko ang paghigpit ng suot niyang long sleeve na naka tupi hanggang siko sa kanyang braso. I saw how his biceps fit on his clothes. He became more masculine and his complexion doesn’t change.

Naalala ko pa kung gaano ako kinakabahan tuwing nakikita ko siyang nakatitig sa akin sa cafeteria noon. I can’t take his glare, kaya lagi akong umiiwas. And now I can look at him straight in the eye.

Kinakabahan man ay nakakaya ko na rin naman.

“Ace…”

Diretsong nakatitig ang kaniyang mga mata sa akin nang banggitin ko ang kaniyang pangalan. Hinangin ng bahagya ang akinh buhok.

“Blair… I don’t want to pressure you and I know it’s too quick. But I really want to ask you this.”

I swallowed hard. Hinihintay kung ano ba ang sasabihin niya.

“Can you be my girlfriend?”

I was surprised. I didn’t know that he will be going to ask me that.

I saw him clenched his jaw. He sighed and looked away.

“Shit, dimwit.” he cursed it in a low husky voice in the cold breeze.

Before I was admiring him from afar. And now he’s asking me to be his girlfriend. Ang bilis ng pintig ng aking puso habang nakatingin sa kaniya.

I like him before and now I liked him more.

Hindi mapalitan ng ibang pakiramdam ang kaba at sayang naghahalo ngayon sa aking puso. Nakita kong umigting ang panga niya bago niya ako hinarap muli.

“Blair, it’s okay with me if you’re not ready-”

“I like you Ace, and it’s a yes.” mahinang sambit ko sa kaniya.

Nakita ko namang mas lalong dumilim ang kanyang mga mata na nakatunghay sa akin ngayon. Then he plasters a little soft warming smile before he took and held my hand.

“I like you too. Finally, you’re my girlfriend now,” he said then held my back.

Bahagya naman akong nagulat nang maramdaman ko ang kamay niya sa aking likod. Hinahapit ako palapit sa kaniya.

So my heart began to beat wildly and crazy as my eyes locked on his serious glares on me. My lips parted as I saw him come closer to me. He ate the distance between us more.

Ang lapit ng aming mga mukha sa isa’t isa. Naramdaman ko rin ang paglapat ng kaniyang katawan sa aking dibdib.

Patuloy na naghuhuramentado sa pagtibok itong puso ko habang nakatitig kami sa isa’t isa. Naninikip ang dibdib ko at para bang nahihirapan sa paghinga.

I saw his glare down to my parted lips. He licked his red luscious mouth while his eyes were now hooded as he looked at me. I felt his hot breath touch my chin. I swallowed hard as I looked at his red thin lips.

Hinawakan niya ang aking mukha at dahan dahang iniangat. He slowly bowed and tilted his head while his eyes narrowly piercing on me. And when I shut my eyes, I felt his lips captured mine.

Nakapikit at pigil hininga kong dinama ang kaniyang halik. He kissed me gently. It wasn’t quick but it wasn’t that long as well. It was enough to make me feel that he’s passionate about me.

Unti unti kong idinilat ang aking mga mata nang maramdamang humiwalay na ang kaniyang mga labi sa akin. Ang bilis ng kabig ng aking dibdib habang nakatingin sa kaniya.

Nakita ko pang dinilaan niya ang kaniyang pang-ibabang labi.

Naramdaman ko naman ang pag-init ng pisngi ko. He is now my boyfriend. He kissed me and I let him. He is my first kiss. Gaya ng ibang mga fairytales, I think I found my prince. Who will save and protect me.

This night is so ecstatic. I was on cloud nine when I saw him looked at me genuinely in the eyes. We stared at each other for a while. At naramdaman ko ang kamay niyang hawakan ang kamay ko.

“Come on, I have to show you something.” He then muttered in a low husky voice.

Napakurap kural naman ako at namamanghang tumungin sa kaniya.

“Ano ’yon?”

Hindi naman niya ako sinagot bagkus ay malamyos lang na tinitigan ako ng diretso sa mga mata. He held my hand and pulled me towards the elevator.

Kabanata 25

Kabanata 25

Baby

Naramdaman ko man na may kirot at mahapdi ang nasa pagitan ng aking mga hita ay nagpumilit pa rin ako kay Ace na ihatid ako ng gabing iyon.

Because I know that my Dad and Mom will still be worried about me when the time they limit on me for tonight was already exceeding. Counted and see as a late in my curfew.

Naging tahimik lang kami buong byahe nang ihatid niya ako nang gabing iyon. I feel strange and awkward about what just happened to us on his unit.

He dropped me home and glance on my way before he went out of the car and open the side door for me. Nagtama ang aming paningin at mabilis naman akong nag-iwas sa kaniya. Nasa gilid kami ngayon ng kaniyang sasakyan sa labas ng aming bahay.

“Does it still sore?” He then asked me, breaking the silence between us.

Hindi maman ako nag-angat ng tingin sa kaniya.

“H-Hindi naman na masyado.” I said in almost a whisper.

Naramdaman ko namang gumalaw siya at lumapit pa sa akin.

“Take a rest. I will text you if I’m home.” He muttered then held my hand as I felt him kissed my temple.

“And… I’m sorry for making you feel sore.” He added, mumbled onto my ears.

Napakagat labi naman ako ron sa kaniyang sinabi at mabilis na naalala ang kung anong nangyari kanina. Lumayo siya sa akin ng bahagya at binigyang distansya ang pagitan naming dalawa ngayon.

His eyes stared on me in sincerety with the adoration of passion.

“Goodnight,” he then said before he stared at me as I walked towards the door of our house.

That night was a bliss of pain that I really got enjoy with him.

The next day, I woke up late. Bumangon na ako mula sa aking higaan at saka kinuha ang cellphone sa side table. Ngiti agad ang gumuhit sa aking mga labi ngayong umaga nang makita ko ang mensahe niya.

Ace:

I got home. I will just take a bath then go to my bed afterward.

Ace:

Are you asleep?

Ace:

Goodnight my Blair, I know I get you tired tonight.

Naramdaman ko namang pamulahan ako ng pisngi sa mga messages niya kagabi na hindi ko na nabasa dahil hinila na ako ng antok pagkapasok ko ng aking silid kagabi.

Ace:

Good morning :)

It was his recent text message for me for today. Napakurap naman ako bago nagtipa.

Ako:

Good morning!

I bit my lip as I put down my phone. Hindi naman mawari ngayon ang ngiti na nakaguhit sa aking mga labi nang maalala ko ang nagyari sa amin kagabi.

It was really happened that I can still feel him inside me. Napakagat labi naman ako nang maalala iyon. I still can’t believe it. I just have my first night with him last night, our first official date and yet we get into that in a sudden.

I went to my bathroom for the bath after reminscing what just happen between me and Ace last night. Inalis ko din naman agad iyon sa aking isipan pagkaraan. I choose to wear a simple baby blue dress for today. Lumabas na ako ng silid at bumaba na para mag-agahan.

Saktong pagkababa ko ay nakita ko si Dad na mukhang may inaasikaso sa salas ng bahay. Nakakunot ang noo niya habang nakatingin sa hawak niyang mga papel.

He’s now sitting on the sofa in our living area. Arranging a lot of papers for work. Mukha siyang problemado kaya nagpasya akong lapitan siya.

Palapit na ako sa kaniya nang makita ko si Ace na prenteng nakaupo sa kaniyang harapan.

Nagugulat ko naman siyang tinignan. He didn’t see me because I was on his back.

What is he doing here? I didn’t know that he’s going here today for his work.

I asked Dad last summer if why he’s always here. And he said that he trains Ace. He submit and does some paper works about their company and he consulted it all to my Dad.

Nagtaka rin naman ako kung bakit kay Dad. Besides, Dad is their company architect, he should be trained by his Dad. And they are in business, kaya nagtataka ako kung bakit engineering ang kinuha niya. Even I heard that he has a plan for taking business after school.

Dad turned his head to me when he noticed my way.

“Blair, hija. Good morning, anyway Ace is here.” Dad said. Animong hindi ko napansin si Ace nang sinabi niya iyon.

I smiled at Dad. Lumapit ako at saka humalik sa kaniyang pisngi.

“Morning Dad,”

“Have you eat your breakfast?”

“Hindi pa po. May problema po ba?” I asked him.

Naalala ko kung gaano siya mukhang namomroblema kanina habang nakatingin sa mga papeles na hawak niya. Nagseryoso sandali ang kaniyang ekspresyon pero agad din naman niya akong nginitian.

“Wala hija, don’t mind it, okay. Mga papeles lang ’yan na kailangan kong pirmahan.”

Dad is always good at everything. He can handle it on his own. He managed it perfectly, so I think there is no problem. I smiled at him. At napalingon naman ako sa harap namin at nakita ko si Ace na nakatingin sa akin ng diretso.

I saw him licked his lower lip.

His physique is fitted while wearing his simple grey V-neck t-shirt and faded jeans matched with brown caterpillar boots.

Naiilang namang iniwas ko ang aking tingin. I know that I shouldn’t be shy of him. He’s my boyfriend and I still can’t believe it. But my thought will just immediately fly with our share night last night and I feel shy as well as awkward about it. Nahihiya akong tumingin sa kaniya sa tuwing naaalala ko ang tungkol sa nangyari sa amin kagabi.

“Uhm, punta lang po ako sa kusina.” pagpapaalam ko kay Dad.

He just nodded. Nagmamadali naman akong umalis na ro’n. I sighed in relief nang marating ko ang kusina at makatakas sa seryosong mga mata ni Ace na nasa akin nakadapo.

Manang Soling prepared my breakfast. Kumain naman na ako at umalis na ng dining room pagkatapos.

Pagkarating ko ng living room ay napansin kong wala na sila Dad at Ace ro’n. Maybe they are in our study room or in Dad’s office. Naglakad nalang ako patungo ng veranda. I sat on the chair and looked at the flowers in front of me.

It was the flower he gave me last night. I put it in a vase. Ipinalagay ko ang iba sa aking kwarto at ito naman ay dito sa labas. Hindi ko alam kung paano kakausapin si Ace tungkol sa relasyon namin.

I don’t want it to be public for now. Mom and Dad will be shocked, at hindi ko alam kung ano pa ang pwedeng maging reaksyon nila kapag nalaman nilang kami na ni Ace. Especially Dad, I don’t think that he will be good at Ace if he knew it. Kahit pa magaan ang loob nito sa kaniya. He trusted Ace and I want it to remain that way.

Hindi ko rin muna gustong ipaalam sa mga kaibigan ko iyon.

“Hey,”

I almost jumped in surprise when I heard his voice.

Tumingin naman ako sa gawi niya at nakita ko siyang nakatayo malapit sa akin. Masasabi kong hindi pa rin ako sanay sa kaniyang presensya lalo na sa tuwing maiisip ko ang namagitan sa amin.

“Let’s go somewhere else, naipaalam na kita sa Dad mo.” He then suddenly said, with his usual normal voice. Very different to what my expression is right now.

We’re going out? Where? Is it a date again?

“S-Saan tayo pupunta?” Naiilang at nagtataka ko pa munang tanong.

“Hmm…”

Nakatingin ako sa bahagyang nakanguso niyang labi, na para bang nag-iisip siya kuwari. It was slightly moist when he licked it. Naramdaman ko namang pinamulahan ako ng pisngi, kaya naman agad akong nag-iwas ng tingin.

“I’m going to play my sport. Gusto kong isama ka. Only if you want to.”

Nag-aalinlangan naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Agad bumagsak ang mga mata ko sa kaniyang mapupulang labi. Hindi ko tuloy maiwasang maalala ang halik niya sa akin kagabi. I felt my cheeks burned.

“Do you wanna come?” he asked me.

Lumapit siya sa akin kaya napaayos ako ng upo. Should I come or not? Naipaalam naman na niya ako at saka gusto ko rin naman siyang makasama muli ngayong araw.

I bit my lower lip.

“Blair, may problema ba?” Mayamaya ay nag-aalalang tanong niya sa akin.

Nag-angat naman ako ng tingin sa kaniya. Bakit ba kasi apektado pa rin ako sa nangyari sa amin kagabi? He seems cool right now while I am, still bothered and feeling awkward about it.

I felt his hand touches my chin now again. He lifted it to his way. His eyes were looked worried.

“What is it?”

“N-Nothing, I think I should have change my dress now so I could go with you.”

Tumingin naman siya sa suot ko.

“Yeah, wear your jeans.”

Nagtaka naman ako sa sinabi niyang susuotin ko.

“I’m going to play guns in the airsoft game site. Just you know, there’s a lot of men there. Please just wear something that covers you up.”

Nagugulat naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Is that so? Okay then. Umalis na muna ako at iniwan siya sa labas.

I change my dress into blue jeans and a plain grey shirt. I think this must be convenient for the place.

Ace is wearing almost the same as what I’m wearing, kaya ’yun ang pinagbasehan ko.

I rarely hang out with my friends, kahit na madalas akong yayain nila Maica. Except if our meeting place is gonna be in the café or in the coffee shop near our school.

Lumabas na ako at bumaba ng hagdan nang makita ko siyang sinuyod ng tingim ang sa suot ko. Nagulat naman ako nang makita siyang nakaabang na sa akin sa living room.

“Is this fine?” tanong ko sa kaniya.

“Yeah,” aniya na may multo ng ngiti sa kaniyang mga labi.

Nagpaalam muna ako kay Dad at sinabi niyang naipaalam naman na raw ako ni Ace kaya ayos na raw iyon. And mom is not here. She’s out for the groceries.

Ace open the door of his car for me. Umalis na kami ng bahay. Tahimik lang ako habang nakatingin sa daan.

“Bakit ang tahimik mo simula kagabi?” he asked me.

Napakurap kurap naman ako at nag-isip ng sasabihin.

“Uhh, a-ano kasi-”

“If it’s about the kiss, I’m sorry.”

Nagugulat naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. I felt my cheeks reddened.

He clenched his jaw. Iniyuko ko nalang ang aking ulo.

“You shouldn’t be sorry,” mahinang sambit ko.

I saw on my peripheral vision that he took a glimpse of me.

“Kung hindi ka pa handa na ipaalam sa kanila ang tungkol sa relasyon natin, it’s okay. I’ll understand.”

Hindi naman ako nagsalita. That is actually what I want for us right now.

“Uhm, sasabihin din naman natin sa kanila. But not now.” mahinang ani ko.

His menacing grey eyes gaze at me.

“Let’s take it slow then,” he smiled a bit before he turned his gaze at the road.

Nagtagal ang biyahe namin dahil malayo rin pala iyong pupuntahan namin. Nakatingin lang ako sa daan habang siya ay seryosong nagmamaneho.

“Do you want to eat? Malapit na rin naman tayo. But in case you’re starving,” biglang tanong niya.

“Hindi na, nag-agahan naman na ako. Mamayang lunch nalang.”

“But it’s already lunchtime,”

Napatingin naman ako sa cellphone kong nasa dashboard niya. It’s eleven twenty and it’s lunchtime. Inihinto niya ang kaniyang sasakyan sa tapat ng isang restaurant.

Bumaba na siya ng sasakyan kaya bumaba na rin ako. Pero naunahan niya akong pagbuksan ng pinto. I smiled when I saw him held my hand as I went out. He still holding my hands as we go inside the resto.

Nang makapasok kami ay nandon pa rin ang tingin ng ilang mga kababaihan sa kaniya. When I will get used to it? O hindi lang talaga ako sanay sa mga matang nakatingin sa aming dalawa.

May iilang bumati sa kaniyang grupo ng mga kalalakihan at inanyayahan siyang magtungo ro’n. Ngunit tinanguan lang niya iyon.

May lumapit sa aming isang waiter.

“This way, Mr. Ventura,”

Mukhang madalas rito si Ace dahil marami ring bumabati sa kaniya.

“I’m often here that’s why they know me.” bulong nito sa’kin.

“Hmm,” I smiled at him when what I’m thinking git answered.

Hinatid kami ng waiter sa aming table. Ace pulled the chair for me. The waiter then takes our order. Umalis na rin siya nang masabi namin ang aming gusto.

Napatingin naman ako sa babaeng nasa bandang likuran ni Ace nang mamukhaan ko iyon. It was the girl in the restaurant when we ate for lunch. Siya ’yung lumapit kay Ace at sinabing hinihintay siya ni Lisa.

Naalala ko ’yon at agad na nagtaka kung bakit din siya nandito.

“Malapit lang dito yung airsoft na pupuntahan natin, it’s just at the other side.” Ace suddenly told.

I just nodded my head.

“Is that you’re favorite sport?” biglang tanong ko.

“Yeah, I mostly go here. I also like racing but you can say that this one is my favorite.” ngumiti pa siya sa akin kalaunan.

I didn’t know that he likes this sport. I mean, he looks sporty pero hindi ko alam na ito pala ang gusto niya.

“Ace! I know you’re gonna be here.” sabi ng babaeng kumausap din sa kaniya noon. Bumaling naman ng tingin sa kaniya si Ace.

“What?” medyo iritadong tanong nito sa babae.

Nagtaka naman ako sa tono ng pananalita niya. Nabakas ko rin ang bahagyang gulat sa babae dahil sa inasal ni Ace.

“Lisa, wants to talk to you. She’s here at kanina ka pa niya hinihintay.”

Agad namang napatingin sa gawi ko si Ace. I slightly bowed my head, kunwari hindi naririnig ang pinag-uusapan nila.

Here’s Lisa again. I thought there’s nothing between them but what is this all? Ayaw ko siyang tanungin kung bakit ba siya gustong kausapin ni Lisa. Pero may parte sa aking naku-kuryoso.

“Tell her that I’m with my girlfriend,”

Mabilis akong nag-angat nang tingin kay Ace nng marinig ko ang sinabi niya. Seryoso siyang nakatingin sa babae at agad din namang inalis doon ang mga mata.

Nakita ko naman kung paano nagulat ang babae sa harap niya nang sinabi niya ’yon. She looked at me for a while then she raised her brow. Our eyes met. Napaiwas naman ako ng tingin ng mapansing nagtataray na ito sa akin.

“Gano’n ba, okay. I’ll tell her then.” aniya at saka umalis at tinalikuran kami papunta sa kanilang table.

Nakita ko ang iilang kalalakihang bumati kay Ace kanina na kasama niya na ngayon sa lamesa nila.

It’s Ace schoolmates for sure. They are all looked rich. Marami ring babae ang nandoon pero nabaling lang ang tingin ko sa isa nang dumating iyon.

I saw Lisa… glaring at me.

Ngayon ko lang ulit siya nakita simula nang gumraduate siya ng senior high. She’s more mature now. The curves of her body are more highlighted than before. She has all the bigs in front but her height never change.

Maybe I’m a few inches taller than her. Her makeup was bold and seductive when you looked at her. She’s wearing a fitted black dress that highlighted her body.

Nakita niya akong nakatingin sa kaniya kaya naibalik ko ang tingin ko kay Ace.

“Who is that girl?” Hindi ko na napigilan pang magtanong kay Ace.

Tumitig naman siya sa akin ng diretso.

“She’s Mia, schoolmate ko.” tipid niyang sagot, pagtukoy sa babaeng lumapit sa amin kanina.

Tumango tango nalang ako at hindi na nagtanong pa. Dumating na rin ang pagkain namin at nag-umpisa nalang kaming kumain. Umalis na rin kami ng natapos kami.

Pinagbuksan niya ulit ako ng pintuan bago siya sumakay ng driver sit. At nang nrating namin ang sinasabi niyang game site and it was so big.

It’s was like an extravagant sports complex that has buildings surrounding it. Pumasok na kami at may iilan kaming nakitang lalaking kakilala niya.

Napansin kong halos lahat nga ng nandito ay pulos mga kalalakihan. May iilang mga babae rin naman pero lamang ang bilang ng mga lalaki.

“Hey, man!” tinapik siya nito sa balikat at nakita kong kuryosong tumingin ito sa gawi ko. His face is familiar.

Ace does the same. Natigil lang ako sa pagtingin sa kanila nang marinig kong banggitin niya ang pangalan ko.

“Bench this is Blair, my girlfriend.” nakangiting pagpapakilala nito sa akin.

My heart started pounding. He said that we will take it slow, but now he’s saying to everyone that I’m his girlfriend!

“He’s Bench, Johnson’s brother.” Pakilala naman ni Ace sa kaniya sa akin.

Nagugulat naman akong tumingin kay Bench. Kaya pala pamilyar ’yong mukha niya. Johnson and Bench have the same eyes and looks. But Bench is looked older than him. He has the same body built like Ace, well-toned. Ang pinagkaiba lang nila ay ’yung complexion. Ace was a bit tan but I can see that it’s just because of sports he was doing outdoor, while Bench on the other side, has pale skin.

“Sabi na eh, you don’t bring girls here for nothing. I know you are special to him. Nice to meet you, Blair.” he lends me his hand but I heard Ace groaned so he took it away immediately.

Agad niyang inalis iyon at saka nalang ako nginitian.

“Tss,” Bench hissed.

Pumasok na kami sa isang malaking room. It wasn’t covered inside. It has a field and rows for the people who will use it.

Nagulat pa ako nang marinig ang malakas na putok ng baril. I almost jumped but Ace held me. May iilang mga nandoon ang umaasinta rin.

“Just watched me here. Mabilis lang ako. I’ll teach you when I come back.”

I just only nodded my head to Ace who’s now getting his gear on. Namamanghang pinanood ko siyang magsuot ng gear. He also wears his headphones that Bench reached out to him.

Malayo na sila sa akin at may harang din kaya hindi ako makakalapit. Bench gave me also the headphones.

“Here, wear it.” aniya.

Kinuha ko naman iyon at saka isinuot. Nakita kong kinakalikot ni Ace ang baril.

I don’t know if what is he doing. Nang makita kong tapos na siyang kalikutin iyon ay hinawakan niya iyon at itinutok sa target.

He looks cool as I watched him position his hand, finding the right posture and angle towards his target. The muscles in his arms are flexing as he held the gun.

Bumagay din sa kaniya ang suot niyang salamin sa mata. It’s just clear and I saw how serious he was while looking at his target. Nakita kong kinalabit niya ang kaniyang baril kalaunan. And I was surprised to see that he hit the head of his target.

Sunod pa niyang inasinta ang iba pa. I can see that he’s really enjoying this because he’s really good at it. Namamangha ko lang siyang pinanood hanggang sa matapos siya.

Umalis na siya sa puwesto niya at saka ako nilapitan.

“Grabe, man! Asintado ka pa rin.” Bench said to him.

Nginisian lang siya ni Ace.

“Pa-impress ka lang eh kasi nandyan ang girlfriend, tss.” dagdag pang aniya at saka iiling-iling na naglakad patungo sa isang pwesto.

“Do you want to try? Don’t worry I’ll guide you.” Ani ni Ace nang makalapit na siya sa akin.

Nag-aalinlangan naman akong napatingin sa pinanggalingan niya. It looks hard when you’re going to look at it. But maybe it’s easy when I learned how to use it. And Ace seems veteran when using the guns.

“I’ll help you,” he softly uttered.

I sighed, “Okay,” mahinang ani ko.

Ngumiti naman siya sa akin at saka may inabot sa aking mga gears.

Iilan lang naman iyon at para na rin sa proteksyon ko. He helps me wear it all. Inalalayan niya pa ako patungo sa pwesto katapat ng isang may kataasang table.

Inayos niya ang baril at nakita kong may tinanggal siya sa hawakan niyon. At may inilagay na bala. Hindi naman na ako nagtanong dahil hindi rin naman ako interesado sa mga baril. And I only want to know how to use it.

Iniangat na nito ang baril at itinutok sa mannequin na target.

Nagulat ako nang maramdaman ang kamay niyang hinawakan ang kamay ko.

“Hold tight the gun, Blair,” he whispered.

Nasa likuran ko siya at ramdam ko ang hininga niya sa likod ng aking tainga. Nakikiliti ako niyon ng bahagya nang maramdaman ko. But then, I hardly tried to ignore it and focused to what he is saying.

I hold the gun tightly like what he said.

“Hold the grip tightly. Put your one finger on the trigger guard. And put lightly your other one finger on the trigger.”

He said it as he guides my hands to hold the gun. Marahan ang haplos at hawak niya sa akin. His callous hand pointed my finger at the trigger. Ang magkabilang braso niya ay nasa makabilang gilid ko rin. Seryoso niya akong inaalalayan sa paghawak ng baril.

Hindi ko naman maiwasang tingnan ang braso niyang nakadikit sa akin. Lumakas ang tibok ng puso ko habang hawak ko ang baril.

“Focused on the target. Breathe slowly, Blair. You’re too tensed. Let’s calm yourself first.”

I swallowed hard when I felt his breath behind my ears.

“Inhale…exhale… Inhale…exhale. Looked at target and point the muzzle of your gun to it.”

I need to focused. Masyado akong naliliyo ng boses niya mula sa likod ko.

“And now, fire. Pull the trigger.”

Kinakabahan man ay nagaw kong kalabitin ang gantilyo ng baril. I am literally shocked when I felt the sudden burst of my gun. Bahagya itong tumaas kaya hindi man lang nadaplisan ang target na nasa harapan ko. Mabuti nalang at hawak ni Ace ang kamay ko namg kalabitin ko ang baril.

Napabuntong hininga ako ng malakas. Tinanggal naman na ni Ace sa pagkakahawak ko ang baril at ibinigay kay Bench na nasa gilid lang pala namin.

“Pahinga ka muna. Kinakabahan ka masyado.” Aniya sa akin.

Naupo kami sa labas ng facility. A little moment later ay bumalik ulit si Ace at sumubok muli. He was really great at this. He shoots the target perfectly spotted. At nang halos isang oras na rin at nakabalik na siya ay nakita ko siyang papalapit na sa akin.

Mabilis pa rin ang kabog ng dibdib ko habang nakaupo ako dito at tanaw tanaw siya. Nakita ko si Ace na papalapit na sa akin.

“Drink this,”

I smiled at him and take the bottled if water he brought to me.

“So? Uuwi na ba kayo? Ire-reserve ba ulit kita next month Ace?” Bench asked suddenly.

Hindi ko namalayan ang pag lapit nito sa amin. Ace also teach me as well at naka tatlong salang lang din ako. And I feel satisfied naman about it.

“Yeah, thanks for today.”

Nagpaalam naman na si Bench sa amin. Tumayo naman na si Ace kaya tumayo na rin ako. Inabot na rin kami ng hapon at paalis na kami.

Nang nasa labas na kami patungo sa sasakyan ni Ace ay natigilan pa ako sa paglalakad nang biglang may yumakap sa likuran ni Ace.

Agad namang inalis ni Ace ang mga kamay na pumulupot sa kaniyang katawan. Hinarap niya iyon. At nagulat naman ako nang makitang si Lisa iyon.

“Ace, Hindi mo na ako sinama rito ah. Bakit nauna ka at hindi mo man lang sinabi sa akin na mag pupunta ka rito. You know that I still want to learn how to use a gun. Tsaka magkaiba tayo ng facility kanina kaya hindi kita nakita.” Lisa said as he holds Ace’s biceps.

Napatingin naman ako kay Ace. Nahagip niya ang tingin ng mga mata ko. Napakurap kurap naman ako at saka akmang papasok na ng sasakyan.

“Lisa, I have to go. I’m with my girlfriend. Hindi ba nasabi sa’yo ’yun ni Mia kanina?”

“Oh, she didn’t tell me”

Lumapit naman sa akin si Ace at hinawakan ako sa aking palapulsuhan. Nakita ko naman kung paanong namilog ang mga mata ni Lisa roon.

“B-Blair,” unti-unting napalitan ng inis ang kaniyang tingin sa akin.

Tiningnan ko naman siya ng tuwid sa mga mata. Kanina pa rin ako naiinis sa mga babaeng lumalapit kay Ace and I can’t do anything about it. Lalo na si Lisa, what’s wrong with her? Hindi ba siya makaintindi?

I know that I’m not jealous, okay? I just shouldn’t. Ace is matured than me and he knows how to handle relationships. Unlike me, it’s my first time to be in a relationship.

“Tara na Ace, I want to go home.” mahinang sambit ko kay Ace kalaunan nang hindi matagalan ang presensya ni Lisa.

Nakita ko namng kumunot ng noo ni Lisa at saka agad na bumaling ng tingin kay Ace.

“Okay, let’s go.” Ace said abruptly to me.

“Uhm, Ace… Mag dinner na muna tayo.” Lisa suddenly said.

Tumaas naman ang isang kilay kong nakatingin sa kaniya. He’s inviting Ace, only Ace. Tumingin naman sa akin ang katabi ko. Nag-iwas nalang ako ng tingin sa kaniya. If Ace wanted to come then he’ll come. It’s his choice. I don’t want to stop him.

“I apologize Lisa, but my baby is tired and I have to take care of her instead of going out with you.”

At naramdaman ko nalang ay nakita kong binuksan ni Ace ang pintuan ng kaniyang sasakyan at saka ako inalalayang pumasok sa loob. Ang bilis ng pintig ng puso ko habang iniisip ang sinabi niya kanina.

He called me what? He said that his baby is tired. And I’m his baby? I bit my lip as I watched him entered the car. Then I remembered that he once called me that last night.

Naiwan namang mag-isa si Lisa sa labas. Nakatingin sa amin ng mariin at matalim.

I smirked habang nakatingin sa kaniya. Tinted ang salamin ng sasakyan ni Ace kaya hindi niya rin kami makikita sa loob.

Sorry Lisa, but I’m Ace’s baby.

Kabanata 26

Kabanata 26

Pain

Tahimik lang ako buong biyahe pauwi sa amin. I didn’t take a glance at Ace’s way. Nakita ko naman siyang minsan na sumulyap sa akin.

Ipinark niya ang sasakyan sa tapat ng bahay. The sun is setting. Natatanglawan siya ng kulay kahel na liwanag ng haring araw nang hinarap ko siya.

Every time I looked at him, I can’t help but admire him more. The light is perfectly hitting his face. His perfect jaw clenched as he turned his gaze on me. Nagugulat naman akong nag-iwas ng tingin.

“Nag-enjoy ka ba?” biglang tanong nito sa akin.

I bit my lower lip. Yeah, I think so. I enjoyed everything with you, anyway.

“Yes, thank you for bringing me there.” tumingin ako sa kaniya nang sinabi ko iyon.

I gulped when he licked his lower lip. Tumatama rin ang sinag ng liwanag sa kaniyang abong mga mata. Ang gandang pagmasdan ng kaniyang makakapal na kilay at pilik mata. His tan skin looks good in the sunlight. He then sexily smirk on me.

Napaiwas naman ako nang tingin nang makitang kong kagatin niya ang pang-ibabang labi niya. He held my face and lifted my chin. Hinuli niya ang mga tingin kong nag-uumpisa ng maglikot.

My lips parted. Dahan dahan ay unti niyang inilapit ang kaniyang mukha sa akin. He is staring at me as well. Then I shut my eyes before I feel his soft lips that caress onto mine.

Iba ang halik niya sa akin ngayon. Matagal, at bahagyang gumagalaw. So I then move mine with him.

Napakagat labi ako nang humiwalay na kami sa isa’t isa. Ramdam kong pinamulahan ako ng pisngi dahil sa nangyari. At ang namumungay nitong mga mata ay dumiin ang pagkakatingin sa akin.

We stared at each other for a while then later on, we went out of his car at pumasok na sa loob ng bahay kalaunan.

“I will talk to your Dad first before I go home. Go to your room, I know you’re exhausted.”

Hinarap ko naman siya. Kinakabahan dahil sa hindi ko inaasahang magiging paghalik niya sa akin kanina sa sasakyan.

“Okay,”

Umalis na ako paakyat ng hagdan. Nasa baba pa siya at nakamasid lang sa akin paakyat. Wala namang preno sa malakas na pagpintig itong puso ko habang paakyat ako.

Tinungo ko na ang silid ko at saka pabagsak na humiga sa aking kama. This day is so tiring yet so good. And I really enjoyed his company.

Hindi ko pa rin makalimutan kung paano niya akong hawakan kanina sa kamay nang turuan niya akong humawak ng baril. He held me softly like I was a fragile thing that he should take care of. Like how his hand caress me last night.

I still remember how his hot breath feels like behind my ears. Pinamulahan ako ng pisngi nang maalala kong lahat ng iyon. Pero hindi ko rin maiwasang maalala kung bakit nandoon din si Lisa.

She said that Ace did not inform her that he’s going there. Pero bakit? Madalas si Ace ron at ’yun ang sinabi niya.

Is he coming there with Lisa before kaya gano’n nalang ang reaksyon niya? At saka ano ba yung laging sinasabi ng Mia na ’yon?  That Lisa wants to talk to Ace. They are talking eventually. But is it something private?

Napailing nalang ako sa mga iniisip ko.

I don’t want to ask Ace about all of this. I don’t want him to think that I’m that immature when it comes to relationships.

He knows how to handle it, he’s more mature than me and we’re just new. Ayaw ko namang magkaroon kami ng hindi pagkakaintindihan.

Alam kong naging masyadong mabilis ang lahat pero ayaw ko namang pagdudahan siya. He said that he likes me and I like him too. Pero pakiramdam ko ngayon ay hindi lang pagkagusto ang nararamdaman ko para sa kaniya.

I think I love him, and I don’t want to tell him that now. I said ‘yes’ to him for being his girlfriend because I’m not just simply like him. I fell in love with him.

I don’t know if we feel the same way. Pero ayaw ko munang sumugal. I want to know if he feels the same way.

Bumangon ako sa aking higaan nang marinig kong tumunog ang aking cell phone. Kinuha ko ito at nakita ang mensahe ni Maica para sa akin.

Maica:

Hi Blair! Pumasok ka ng maaga bukas ah, I have something to tell you.

Napakunot naman ang noo ko sa message niya.

Ako:

Okay:) Tungkol nga pala saan ’yung sasabihin mo?

Maica:

Sorry, I want to tell you about it personally.

Mukhang seryoso ang sasabihin sa akin ni Maica kaya hindi nalang ako nagtanong pa. She rarely texts me this seriously. I shrugged and I heard my phone beeped again.

Ace:

Uuwi na ako, huwag ka ng lumabas ng kwarto mo. You should rest.

Ako:

Alright. Ingat sa pagmamaneho.

Ibinaba ko ang cellphone ko sa table ko. At naglakad patungong balkonahe. I slid the glass door as I went out. Dumungaw ako sa ibaba at saktong nakita kong umandar na ang sasakyan ni Ace.

Nagdilim na rin ang kalangitan. Nakangiti ako habang tinatanaw ang sasakyan niya paalis. Bumalik na ako sa loob at tinungo ang bathroom. I change my clothes and went out of my room for dinner.

Nang makababa ako ay wala pa sila Mom at Dad sa hapag. Napatingin ako kay Manang Soling na nakatayo sa gilid ko.

“Manang, where’s Mom and Dad?” nagtatakang tanong ko.

Tuwing gabi at ganitong weekdays ay hindi naman sila nahuhuli ng dating sa hapag kainan. Kaya nakakapagtakang wala pa sila.

“May inaasikaso pa ang ina at ama mo. Nasa opisina sila ngayon ng Dad mo. Mauna ka na raw kumain.” nakangiting sinabi sa akin ni Manang.

But Ace talked to Dad before he left. Baka busy lang talaga ngayon sila Mom kaya hindi na nila ako nasabayan ngayon. Tinapos ko ang pagkain at hindi pa rin nakaka-baba sila Dad.

They are just in Dad’s office upstairs. Tawagin ko nalang kaya sila para makakain na o ipadala ko nalang sa office ni Dad yung pagkain nila para hindi na sila bumaba?

I stood up and went upstairs to check on them. Naglalakad ako patungo ng office ni Dad nang marinig ko ang boses ni Mom nang malapit na ako.

“Ano na ngayon ang gagawin natin Clarence? Pinagkaisahan na nila tayo, and yet you still want to continue that stupid project?!” I heard Mom shouted.

Mabilis naman akong nakaramdam ng kaba sa aking dibdib nang marinig kong humahagulgol si Mommy sa pag-iyak.

Naririnig ko ang boses nila na nanggagaling mula sa kanilang silid. Lumiko ako at lumapit sa pintuan ng kuwarto nila. The door is slightly open, the reason why I can hear them inside.

“Beatrice, trust me. This time it will work-”

“No Clarence! We’re bankrupt now and they are blaming us because of the money that you took!”

“I said I didn’t get anything! How many times do I have to tell you that? Why don’t you believe me instead of that freaking paper! They’re just accusing me.” nagpipigil ng galit na sinabi ni Dad.

His voice is not shaking, he said it in a clear and loud thud baritone voice. I heard Mom’s sobs. Napahawak naman ako sa aking bibig. Naiiyak ako na naririnig ko silang nagtatalong dalawa.

I haven’t seen their wrangle. They are always sweet to each other. Kaya hindi ako sanay na naririnig silang nagtatalong dalawa.

“Beatrice, please believe me. You know I can’t do that. Please, please…” narinig kong pagmamakaawa ni Dad kay Mom.

Hindi ko na napigilan pa ang pag-iyak ko habang nakikinig sa usapan nila. Naninikip ng dibdib ko sa paghikbi. Hindi pa rin tumitigil sa pag-iyak si Mommy. Sumilip ako sa maliit na siwang ng pintuan para tsilipin sila sa loob.

Nakita kong nilapitan ni Dad si Mom sa kama at saka inalo. He hugged Mom tightly as she lamented in wails of tears.

Umalis na ako at tumakbo papuntang kuwarto ko. Pinunasan ko ang mga luhang dumaloy sa aking pisngi. Humiga nalang ako at saka ipinikit ang aking mga mata.

Is this about our company? Or about their projects with the Ventura? And what is my Mom talking about? Someone blaming my Dad?

Nanikip ang dibdib ko kasabay ng mahinang paghikbi. Hindi ko alam na ganito na pala ang pinagdadaanan nila Mom ngayon. Our company was bankrupt. That explains why Dad seems so busy these past few days. I didn’t even notice that they are dealing with this downfall dahil ipinapakita lang sa akin nila Dad and Mom na maayos lang ang lahat.

I bit my lower lip as I cried. Narinig ko namang may tumunog mula sa side table. Kinuha ko iyon at nakita ang mensahe sa akin ni Ace.

Ace:

I’m done taking a bath, I’m about to sleep. Matulog ka na rin.

Binasa ko lang ang mensahe niya at hindi na nagreply. Napatingin ulit ako sa screen ng phone ko nang makitang may mensahe pa siyang muli.

Ace:

Goodnight baby,

Napalunok ako nang mabasa ang huli niyang mensahe. Naipikit ko nalang ang mga mata ko at nakatulugan ang pag-iyak.

Maaga akong nagising kinabukasan. Bahagya pang namamaga ang mga mata ko dahil sa pag-iyak. Tinakpan ko nalang ito ng kaunting concealer para hindi masyadong halata.

Hindi talaga ako sanay na makita at marinig sila Mom na nagtatalo. And hearing them screaming and lamented to each other tear me apart.

Tinignan ko muna ang phone kong hindi ko na nai-charge kagabi dahil nakatulugan ko dahil sa pag-iyak. I turn it on and see that there was a message from Ace.

Ace:

Good morning. I’ll pick you up mamaya :)

Ako:

Morning, okay.

Nakakapanibagong pumasok ako ng ganito. Nag-away sila Mom at Dad kagabi, hindi ko alam kung nagkasundo na ba silang dalawa. Hindi ko kayang makita silang hindi nagpapansinan sa hapag.

At kaya naman nang pagkapasok ko ng dining room ay napansin ko agad na wala si dad. Napabuntong hininga agad ako.

Nagulat naman ako nang makita ko si Mom na naghahain sa lamesa. Ngumiti siya sa akin nang makita niya akong dumating.

I let a small weakly smile for her and kissed her cheeks.

“Good morning Mom,”

“Morning, kumain ka na,” she said softly.

Hindi naman nakatakas sa aking tingin ang mga mata niyang namamaga. She acted like she’s fine and nothing is bad happening. Even I can see through her eyes the sorrow.

I sat on my chair and glanced at her wearily.

“Where’s Dad, Mom?”

Binalingan naman niya agad ako ng tingin. She slightly smiled before she answered me but it didn’t reach her eyes.

“Maagang umalis ang Dad mo patungong trabaho. Marami kasing inaasikaso.”

“I missed you both, Mom.” naiiyak kong sambit.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit biglang ’yon nalang ang nasabi ko. Siguro ay marahil bihira ko na silang makasama ngayon sa hapag. Recently they are busy with the company. And I’m not used to it. Madalas kaming sabay sabay na kumakain, at nitong mga nakaraan ay hindi na.

Nilapitan naman ako ni Mommy at saka niyakap. She kissed my temple as she caressed my hair softly.

“Aww, sorry sweety. We are just busy with the company kaya madalas kaming wala. Don’t worry I will talk to your Dad to celebrate Christmas out of the country so we can have time to spent together.”

Inilayo niya ang kaniyang mukha para tingnan ako.

“Is that okay with you, sweety?” Mom asked with a smile on her lips.

Napangiti naman ako sa ideyang iyon. I just nodded my head to her. Nakangiti ko namang tinapos ang aking agahan dahil sa sinabi ni Mom. Mukhang nagka-ayos na rin naman sila Dad kagabi kaya nakahinga ako ng maluwag.

Inihatid na ako ng driver ko sa school. And as I went out of the car and I saw Clark. Kakababa lang rin niya ng sasakyan na gaya ko. Nagtagpo ang aming mga tingin kaya kumaway ako sa kaniya. Nagtataka man na dito siya bumaba ay hindi ko na iyon inalintana pa.

I noticed that he looked sad when his eyes met mine. Pumikit siya ng mariin at saka umalis na.

My forehead creased at that. He didn’t wave back. Samantalang dati ay siya pa ang lumalapit sa akin at binabati ako ng magandang umaga. Nagtataka ko naman siyang tinignan habang naglalakad palayo sa akin.

I looked down. Hindi ko maiwasang alalahanin kung paano akong tinalikuran ni Clark kanina. Hindi naman siya gano’n kaya nakakapagtaka.

Dumaan ako sa garden side ng school papunta ng building namin. Tahimik at iniisip kung bakit gano’n ang naging pag-iwas ni Clark sa akin kanina. At nang makasalubong ko naman si Sean na nagmamadaling naglalakad. I smiled and greeted him.

“Hi Sean!” he looked at me but he didn’t mind to spoke.

Diretso lang ang lakad niya hanggang sa malagpasan ako. Naiwan namang napamaang ang aking mga labi dahil sa ginawa niyang paglagpas sa aking gawi.

Why they are all ignoring me? Nag-aalala akong tumingin sa likuran ni Sean habang tinatanaw siyang naglalakad palayo.

He saw me and he just ignored me. He didn’t even stop walking. They are acting weird. Clark and Sean weren’t like this.

Nagpatuloy nalang ako sa paglalakad papuntang senior high building. And I also noticed the strange glares of my schoolmates on me. I just ignored it, probably because of the fight between Angela and me. Because of the video they cannot get to move on abrupt.

May iilan ding nagbubulungan akong nakita habang nakatingin sa akin. Yumuko nalang ako para iwasan ang kanilang mga tingin.

Pumasok ako ng aming classroom at nakita ko si Maica na nakaupo sa tabi ng isa kong kaklaseng babae. Umupo naman ako sa upuan ko.

Hindi ko alam kung nakita ba ako ni Maica nang pumasok ako. Nasa kaliwang row siya at nakatalikod sa akin. Kausap niya si Jean.

“Maica,” I called her. Dahil naalala kong may importante nga pala siyang sasabihin sa akin.

Napatingin naman sa akin ang kaklase kong nasa unahan ko. But Maica didn’t turn her back. Maybe she didn’t hear me. So I called her again pero hindi pa rin niya ako tiningnan.

Natigil lang ako sa pagtingin sa kanila nang dumating na ang aming guro. The first and second periods of morning class passed and Maica is still ignoring me.

Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko dahil hindi niya man lang ako tinitingnan. At nagulat ako na hindi man lang siya bumalik sa upuan na nasa aking tabi kung saan siya nakaupong talaga.

When the break came, I approached her. Paalis na sila ni Jean nang lumapit ako sa kanila.

“Uhm, Maica,” pagtawag ko sa kaniyang muli.

Natigil naman siya sa pag-aayos niya ng mga gamit.

“Mauna ka na Jean, susunod ako,” she said to Jean.

Humarap sa akin si Maica. Nakita ko ang pag-aalinlangan sa mga mata niya nang maglapat ang aming mga tingin.

“You said that… you have something to tell me. What is it?” tanong ko sa kaniya.

Hindi naman siya nagsalita. Nakatitig lang siya sa akin.

“I-Iniiwasan mo rin ba ako?” I asked nervously when I noticed that her glares on me were lifeless.

Hindi ko maiwasang malungkot at magtaka sa mga nangyayari. Clark and Sean ignored me. And now my best friend Maica is avoiding me as well.

“Sorry, Blair.” ’yon lang ang tangi niyang sinabi at tinalikuran niya na ako at saka umalis.

Mag-isa naman na ako ngayon dito sa loob ng classroom na naiwan. I sighed as I felt alone again. I feel like I’m back to normal. That others do not notice and get to even interact with me. Instead, they are all avoiding me.

Nakayuko kong tinungo ang cafeteria ng mag-isa. Halos lahat ng nandoon ay napatingin sa akin nang pumasok ako.

Pumunta ako sa counter at inignora ang kanilang mga tingin. Nakita ko pang naglakad si Elena patungo sa gawi ko. Paalis na ako dala ang tray sa kamay ko nang makita ko siyang lumapit sa akin.

“Hey, pathetic slut Blair. Guess, what. Baka paalisin ka na ng school na ’to dahil hindi mo na afford ang tuition fee.” tumawa siya kasabay ng ilang mga estudyanteng nakarinig sa sinabi niya.

Napatingin naman ako sa gawi nila Maica at Sean. Kasama rin nila si Johnson at Clark. Nakita ko pang pinigilan ni Sean si Maica na tumayo. Yumuko nalang siya at saka sila bumalik sa dating ayos, na parang walang naririnig at hindi binalingan ang aking gawi.

Hindi ko man naintindihan ang sinabi ni Elena sa akin ay ang mga tawanan at pangmamaliit na mga tingin ng ibang estudyante dito sa loob ng cafeteria and nagpapaliit sa akin.

“Such a loser! Get out on my way. Baka matapunan mo pa ng dumi itong mamahalin kong bag.” maarteng aniya.

I swallowed hard then I walked away. I just ignored what she said. Hindi ko rin naman alam kung ano ba ang ibig niyang sabihin.

Lumapit ako sa table nila Maica kung saan kami laging nakapwesto. Inilagay ko ron ang tray na hawak ko.

And I was stunned when they suddenly stood up and get their snacks. I was about to sit and they did that.

“S-Sandali, saan kayo pupunta?” tanong ko sa kanila.

Naiiyak na ako habang nakatingin sa kanila habang hindi naman ako magawang tingnan ng tatlo.

Tanging si Johnson lang ang tumingin sa gawi ko.

“We are going,”

“B-Bakit niyo ba ako iniiwasan?” tanong ko sa kaniya.

“Let’s go Johnson,” Maica then muttered to him.

Napalunok akong muli nang mauna na siyang maglakad paalis. Sumunod naman sa kaniya si Sean at Clark.

Naiwan naman kaming dalawa ni Johnson.

“Pasensya na sa inasal namin. Napag-utusan lang kami ng mga magulang namin na huwag kang kausapin at huwag nang kaibiganin.” nag-aalinlangan man ay sinabi pa rin sa akin ni Johnson.

What? I mean why? How? 

“B-Bakit naman?” Naguguluhan at natitigilan kong tanong sa kaniya.

“About you’re company. It’s now bankrupt and losing money, Blair. All the projects are postponed. They thought that your Dad made all of this. The Ventura is investigating about the money they lost for the project at kung saan ’yon napunta. Natigil din ang construction sa ginagawang malaking proyekto ng senator. It’s under the Ventura Holdings at ang Dad mo ang namumuno ro’n.”

Hindi naman ako makapaniwalang tumingin sa kaniya.

“But my Dad is just an architect. He’s not an engineer. Bakit siya ang namuno? And what about the money? Dad will never do the things they are accusing.”

Napailing iling naman siya habang ang mga mata ay nagyo’y nagseryoso na.

“I’m sorry Blair, but maybe you should ask your parents about this. Hindi ako ang dapat na nagsasabi nito sa’yo.” He only said then turn his back on me, now leaving with Maica and others.

Napabuntong hininga naman ako at naiwang naguguluhan sa mga sinabi niya. Kalaunan ay umalis na rin ako ng cafeteria at nagtungo ng bathroom. Walang estudyante ngayon ang nandito.

Naghilamos ako ng mukha habang pinagmamasdan ang sarili sa salamin. Nanlulumo akong napayuko at ipinikit ang aking mga mata sa sink.

Tahimik lang akong umiyak. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ito nangyayari sa amin ngayon. ’Yun din siguro ang pinagtataluhan nila Mom at Dad kagabi. Hindi ako makapaniwalang ganito kaseryoso ang problema namin sa kompanya.

I thought Dad handle it all fine. And we have nothing to worry about. Ano nalang ang sasabihin ni Ace sa’kin? About my Dad that his trainer and their company’s employee. We’re also one of their stockholders for goodness sake.

I believe that Dad cannot do it to them. Dad cannot take the money they are inserting that lose from my Dad’s firm. Maybe someone is just dragging him down.

Hindi na malabong mangyari iyon kay Dad dahil marami sa kaniyang naiinggit. Sa lahat nang natamo niyang success sa murang edad. Hindi imposibleng mangyari iyon.

The whole day passed and I was dejected. At hindi man lang ako nagawang balingan at kausapin man lang ni Maica.

Tumungo ako ng parking lot ng mag-isa. Nakita ko sila Sean at Clark na nauna nang umalis. May sumundo rin kay Maica at nakita kong may kasama pa siyang isang bodyguard.

Tuluyan na talaga nila akong iniwasan. Akala ko pa naman ay hindi sila katulad ng iba. But they are just like them.

Maybe it’s not their fault, right? They are just obeying their parents. Pero nakakalungkot pa ring isipin na dahil lang sa inaakusa nila kay Daddy ay iniwasan na nila ako.

Their families are one of the richest too. Kaya hindi malabong sa karera ng industriya na ito ay mangyari ang ganitong problema. Kaya siguro nila ako iniiwasan ay dahil ayaw nilang mainvolve sa amin.

That’s why I wanted to go home now to ask Mom and Dad about it all. For sure it’s just a rumor to stain my Dad’s name. I need their explanation about this all.

“Tss, Look who’s here?” Mabilis naman akong napatingin sa pinagmulan ng boses na narinig ko kung saan.

I saw Elena with Angela. They are both glaring at me. Nakangisi pa si Elena sa akin habang nakataas naman ang kilay ni Angela sa akin habang masamang nakatingin sa akin.

“Sinong sundo mo? Haha, asa ka pang darating siya.” ani Elena sa akin.

My forehead creased.

Lumapit naman ng bahagya sa akin si Angela. I stepped backward. Baka manakit na naman siya ng hindi ko inaasahan at ma-video-han na naman ako.

But I was surprised when Angela smirked at me.

“Si Ace ba ang susundo sa’yo ngayon?” si Angela.

Napatingin naman ako sa hawak kong cell phone. Wala pa ring text si Ace kung papunta na ba siya ngayon para sunduin ako. Pero hindi naman na ako naghintay dahil madalas naman siyang dumarating ng walang pasabi at mas maaga pa sa inaakala ko, ngunit ngayon ay mukhang natagalan siya.

I looked at Elena when I heard her made the soft round of applause. That seems annoying… Mocking me intently.

“Oh Blair, you’re really such a loser! You really believe Ace that he likes you? Gosh! Look at yourself, you’re not even his type. You are so stupid for not knowing that.” ani Elena sa akin.

Natigilan naman ako sa sinabi niya. What is she talking about? I then felt my chest tighten because of what she was saying.

Nalilito ko silang tiningnan kalaunan.

“Ano bang kailangan niyo sa akin Elena, Angela? Please lang dahil ayaw ko na ng gulo.” I then asked them dahil kahit papaano ay napapagod na rin ako sa panggugulo nila sa akin.

“Wala naman Blair. Kung tutuusin nga may itatanong lang kami sa’yo.” Elena muttered playfully.

Mabilis namang nangunot ang aking noo at magsalubong ang aking mga kilay. At nang magsalita si Angela ay do’n na unti unti nawala ang pagkakakunot ng aking noo.

“Did Ace even tell you that he loves you? Or did you answer him because you were the only one who really loved him? You fell into the trap of an Ace Ventura, Britney Claire Cortez.” biglang bulalas ni Angela sa akin.

Bumibilis ang pintig ng puso ko habang naririnig ang mga sinasabi nila. No, they just want to ruin us kaya hindi ko paniniwalaan ang anumang sasabihin nila sa akin.

“B-Bakit niyo sinasabi ’to sa akin?  Wala namang kami ni AAce.” pagtanggi ko sa relasyon namin dahil wala akong ideya kung saan nakuha ni Angela ang mga pinagsasasabi niya sa akin kanina.

“Huh, we know that you are now his girlfriend. Pero ang hindi mo alam you are just his rebound. Dahil sila talaga ni Lisa! Pampalipas ka lang!” Elena exclaimed like it was some revelation that would kill me.

And she never fails to make me feel weken about what she just said. Nanginginig ang mga labi kong pinilit na mag salita.

“Stop this, Elena! Sinisiraan niyo lang sa akin si Ace dahil alam kong gusto niyo siya. And you can’t get even to me.” hinihingal kong sabi dahil sa mabilis na pagtibok ng aking puso.

I felt my eyes watered as I looked at them. Pero kahit na gano’n ay hindi ko hinayang tumulo iyon at ipakitang naiiyak na ako.

But when Elena showed me her phone, I felt my legs trembled.

“Here’s the proof that you are just a rebound, Blair. And don’t act that he really loves you. Iiwan ka rin niya gaya ng ginawa niya sa akin!” Angela shouted at me.

My eyes blurred as I looked at the phone in front of me.

It was Ace and Lisa in the picture. They are kissing, wildly. Magulo ang suot ni Ace na damit habang nakakapit naman ang mga braso ni Lisa sa kaniyang batok. Hinapit pa ni Lisa ang pagkakahawak sa braso ni Ace na parang sabik na sabik sa halikan nila.

My grew hot tears rolled down to my cheeks as I feel like I’m going down onto my knees. What is that picture? I can’t take to look at it for long so I immediately looked down.

Napatingin ako sa ibaba habang iniisip ko kung ano ba talaga kami ni Ace. I suddenly feel stupid for being in love with him. I feel stupid for loving him. I am so stupid for letting him be my boyfriend even I thought that he only likes me and didn’t love me enough.

I am so stupid for trusting him and believing him.

I am damn freaking stupid.

Walang tigil sa pagtulo ang luha ko habang nakatingin sa sahig.

“Hmm, ayan na ang sundo mo Blair. If I were you, I will stop being stupid for him. He’s like other guys, pagkatapos niyang makuha ang gusto niya iiwan ka rin niya.” mahinang ani ni Angela sa akin na may mariing mga tingin.

Umalis na sila at iniwan akong mag-isa.

Ang sakit sakit ng dibdib ko habang pinipilit kong tumayo. Habol ang hininga kong kinuha ang cellphone ko at nanginginig ang mga kamay na ti-next ang driver ko para magpasundo.

Gusto ko sanang hindi paniwalaan ang mga sinasabi nila Elena at Angela sa akin tungkol kay Ace but the picture they threw on me, shatters the barrier I made for Ace. It was the boundary that will set on us two. To keep us both in line. But when I saw the picture of him kissing Lisa thoroughly, he just cutted and broke the line I made for us.

Nakakapanghina at bagsak ang balikat kong hindi kayang tanggapin ang litratong aking nakita. So I am just a rebound? He just played my feelings? What am I to him? I do even let him get inside me. I let him get the whole me.

“Britney Clair Cortez,” then suddenly, I heard his cold baritone voice called me from behind my back.

Mariin kong naipikit ang aking mga mata kasabay ng pagpatak ng dalawang butil kong pagluha.

What is happening now? Why it seems like everything I have, starting to avoid me… At ngayon ay malalaman ko nalang ang tungkol kay Ace na ganito pala. Hindi ko alam kung paanong haharapin ang ganito kasakit na katotohanang si Lisa naman pala talaga ang gusto niya.

Masakit at nakakapanlumo.

Kabanata 27

Kabanata 27

Evil

Ang sikip sikip ng aking dibdib habang naglalakad palayo sa kaniya. Hindi ko na alam kung ano ba ang gagawin at paniniwalaan ko.

“Britney Clair Cortez, where are you going?” Mariin niyang pagtawag sa aking pangalan dahil hindi ko siya magawang harapin.

Natigilan ako sa paglalakad pero ang luhang dumadaloy sa aking mga pisngi ay walang tigil. Hirap na hirap ako sa paghinga habang dahan dahan ko siyang hinarap.

I bit my lower lip as I glanced at him. His grey eyes were bloodshot.

Marahan siyang naglakad palapit sa akin, na para bang alam niya na kung bakit ako nagkakaganito. My heart is tearing apart as he slowly approached me.

His eyes were weary. Does it mean that it’s really true? He only lied to me? He only played with me. I’m just his rebound.

Napahagulgol na ako sa sakit na nararamdaman ko. Akmang tatakbo na ako palayo sa kaniya nang maramdaman ko ang mga braso niyang nakayakap sa akin.

Naririnig ko ang kaniyang mabilis na paghinga habang mahigpit na nakayakap sa akin mula sa aking likuran. I tried to speak but no words came out. Only my stopping sobs, that my broken heart can give.

“S-So you and Lisa… are in a relationship?” mapait kong tanong sa kaniya.

He did not speak. I heard him sighed loudly. His breathing heavy and I can feel it.

“P-Please, don’t hurt me this way Ace. Sinagot kita kasi hindi lang kita gusto and now we’re in this relationship at malalaman kong may iba ka pa lang talaga.” I then shook my head with my voice strained as I spoke.

Pilit kong inaalis ang kamay niyang nakayakap sa aking tiyan. Masyadong mahigpit iyon na hindi ko halos magawang alisin.

That really struck me hard.

“Don’t believe them, you said that you’ll trust me. So just stick to it…please.”

Paano pa ako maniniwala sa kaniya kung wala naman pala akong kasiguraduhan. I do love him in a short period of time because I thought my feelings for him was only infatuation. But he broke my heart that easily. Because I give him my heart and trust in a sudden.

“Tell me, Ace, d-do you love me? Lahat ba ng ginawa natin is all a lie? Did you just pretend?”

My tears are like waterfalls, never stop from falling to my cheeks. I breathe heavily. My chest is so heavy and the feelings inside it. I want it to burst for myself. But how? Nanghihina ako sa tuwing iisipin ko palang ang gabing may nangyari sa amin at makikita ko sa litrato na may kahalikan siyang iba.

I feel so drained. I am so tired of crying since last night because of my Mom and Dad’s quarrel, and earlier about my friends avoiding me and now, him.

“Let’s go, I’ll take you home.” he only said in a very stern way.

“You did not answer my question, Ace!” I raised.

Nagpumiglas ako mula sa kaniyang pagkakahapit sa akin at nakawala mula sa pagkakayakap niya. Pakiramdam ko ay wasak na wasak ang puso ko. Habang nakatingin sa kaniyang mga matang wala man lang ekspresyon.

He’s my first, and I wish that he will be the last. Kaya hindi ko lubos mainda ang sakit dahil kahit kailan ay hindi ko pa ito naramdaman. Hindi pa ako nasaktan ng ganito ng dahil lang sa pagmamahal.

“Let’s break. I’m breaking up with you! You just freaking fooled me. And I don’t want to see you anymore.” pahina nang pahina ang boses ko habang sinabi ko ang mga katagang ’yon.

Nakita ko namang bumagsak ang kaniyang balikat. He looked at me straight in the eye.

His glare was dark and intense. The subtle stares that I’ve seen to him before was now gone. It breaks my heart more when I saw how menacing and serious his face glaring at me.

He swallowed hard. He clenched his jaw. He parted his mouth and licked his lower lip like he won’t but what I just pronounced.

“Let’s not talk about it Blair, I know you’re just tired from school-”

“No, I’m serious. Let’s stop this shit.” I retorted sharply.

And when I saw our car parked near behind me. I glanced at him first before I turned and look away.

“Blair,” he called me weakly.

I never looked back at him as I started walking away towards my car. Mabigat ang loob at may kirot sa aking dibdib. Agad akong tumakbo palapit sa sasakyan at nagmamadaling pumasok. I shut the door and never look back as our car started moving.

Ang bilis nang pintig ng aking puso. Hindi dahil sa sayang nararamdaman ko dahil alam kong nandiyaan siya. Kung hindi dahil sa alam kong hindi naman niya talaga ako sineryoso.

Because of my heart that leaves in ache. I feel like it’s now broken. I didn’t know that he’s that type of guy. He seems serious and stoic every time he’s with me. He’s more matured than me so I expect him to be that serious when it comes to us. When it comes to our relationship. But then I was wrong.

So that’s all explained it. Mia approached him because of Lisa. And Lisa’s embrace when we are in the airsoft, is that an act that Ace was just pretending? Is he just used me to make Lisa jealous? Do I become his toy?

I didn’t ask him about it because I know that Lisa was just aggressive at that time. I don’t want to stain our relationship and give him a thought that I’m too immature to think of it all.

I trusted him and believed him from the very beginning and yet he lied.

He said that he just only wants to protect me from Angela and Elena. But if you think of it, he just only wants to save his ass. Marahil alam na talaga nila Elena iyon simula pa lang at ayaw niyang malaman ko mula sa kanila iyon.

Nakauwi ako sa amin ng tahimik lang at mabagal ang paraan ng paglalakad.

My friends leave me. They are ignoring me the whole day. At paniguradong magtatagal pa iyon. Or should I say, they will totally be gone into my life. The judgmental glares of my schoolmates. And the gossips they made. It was all excruciating in me.

And now Ace… I left him. No, he’s really not there from the very beginning.

Pulos mabigat na bagay na nakadagan sa aking dibdib nalang ang nararamdaman ng aking puso sa mga oras na ito. Wala ng luhang lumalabas sa aking mga mata.

I go upstairs and went inside my room. Nagmukmok at nagkulong lang ako sa kuwarto ko hanggang sa hindi ko alam na inabot na ako ng gabihan.

“Blair, hija. Are you not hungry? Gabi na anak, halika na at kakain na tayo.” I heard my Mom’s soft voice called me.

Napadilat naman ako ng mata at saka bumangon ng kama. Hindi ko namalayang nakatulugan ko na pala ang pag-iisip sa lahat ng nangyari kanina.

I sighed before I stood up. I need to act that I’m fine because Mom and Dad doesn’t know what’s between me and Ace. I don’t want them to think that I got hurt because of him.

I opened the door and I saw my Mom. She looked stressed but her beauty doesn’t fade.

“May problema ba anak?” nag-aalalang bungad niya sa akin.

Napailing naman agad ako. I smiled at her to see that there is no problem, assuring her that I’m just fine.

“Wala po Mom. Pagod lang po sa school.”

She stared at me for seconds like she was examining me before she nodded and held my arm. Sabay kaming bumaba ng hagdan patungong dining. Umupo ako sa madalas kong puwesto nang marating namin ang hapag kainan. Nakangiti naman akong tiningnan ni Dad.

“How’s my sweety? Are you stressed about your school? You know I can help you with that. O baka naman marami nang nanliligaw sayo, ah. Tell them to come straight to me first before I let them courted you.” He said that in a very light way.

Dad is looked fine today. Well, he always actually. He constantly asked me if I have manliligaw and I always just tell them if ever I will have, I will tell them. But that is when I was on my junior high.

I know that he’s just only protective when it comes to me. Pero hindi ko sinabi ang tungkol kay Ace. And it was a short-lived relationship… I guess.

“Wala naman po Dad,” tipid kong sagot sa mahina at mababang boses.

Narinig ko pang tumikhim si Dad. I looked at him.

“Your Mom told me that you want us to have a bonding moment and this Christmas out of the country. Is that what you want?”

Binalingan ko si Mom ng tingin. Tumaas pa ang dalawang kilay nito habang malamyos na nakangiti sa akin.

“Yes, Dad. It’s been a while, and I really missed you both. Recently puro nalang kayo trabaho and I was busy with my school. At para ma-relax na rin kayo from work.” masaya at umaasang ani ko.

Napansin kong bahagya naman silang natigilan nang sinabi ko ang tungkol sa trabaho.

“Hmm, well I also want to refresh. It was a nice idea. Sige, this twenty of December were going to leave.”

I smiled when Dad announced it. He agreed to it.

Then I remember Ace. Hindi siya sasama sa mga magulang niya sa ibang bansa para rito siya mag pasko at bagong taon. He said that he had something to do here. And dad asked him if it’s about his girl.

Most probably it’s Lisa. Hindi ko pa rin matanggap na ganoon ang kinalabasan ng relasyon namin. He didn’t even tell me his side.

“Pumunta nga pala si Ace dito kanina.” Mayamaya ay seryosong sabi ni Dad.

I immediately looked at my father’s way after hearing what he said. Then I let a heavy sigh as my eyes remain on my food now.

“He said that he wanted to talk to you. May hindi ba ako alam sa inyo ni Ace, Blair? May problema ba?” Dad seriously asked. Nakakunot pa ang noo nitong nakatingin sa akin.

Napakurap kurap naman ako sa tanong niya. He seems doubtful as he looked at me. I know that he just only serious but his facial reaction says the opposite. Mabilis naman akong nakaramdam ng kaba.

“Wala po Dad. I don’t want to see him. I’m still not used to seeing him around.” I alibi.

Naningkit naman ang mga matang tiningnan niya ako ng diretso sa mga mata. Tumataas baba ang dibdib ko dahil sa matinding kabang lumalamon sa aking dibdib.

“If you liked him, Blair, it’s fine with me. But if there is someone else you could choose. Be it, just not Ace. I don’t want him to hurt you.”

Naluluha naman akong napaangat ng tingin kay Dad. Pinipigilan ko ang aking sarili na magsalita dahil alam kong mababasag lang aking boses.

Then dad gave me a genuine smile that I didn’t expect.

“He’s too far from us, Blair. I want you to know it. But you know that I’m just always here for you, right?”

My lips trembled as I smiled at Dad.

“We’re just here for you Blair. Lahat ng ginagawa namin ay para sa’yo, we want you to know it.” Mom then uttered in front of me.

Napatingin ako sa kanilang dalawa. Pakiramdam ko ay tinatabunan ng pagmamahal nila para sa akin ang bigat at sakit na nararamdaman ko sa nangyari ngayong buong maghapon.

“I love you, Mom… Dad.” Hindi ko na napigilan pa ang luha ko sa pagtulo.

They stood up and hugged me.

“Aww, my sweety is too touch. We love you too.” it was Mom and she then kissed my temple.

“We love you, Blair,” Dad said then kissed my forehead as well.

Para akong bumalik sa pagkabata habang ginagawa nila iyon sa akin. I was crying because of happiness, to know that my Dad and Mom are just always there for me. But at the same time, I cried because of the pain, by the thought of Ace fooling me and my friends are avoiding me.

Nangiti naman kami at sabay sabay na napailing sa isa’t isa habang pinupunasan ni Mom ang basa kong pisngi. Masayang tinapos namin ang dinner. Ngayon lang ulit kami nagkasabay sabay sa hapag kaya inalis ko muna sa isipan ko ang tungkol kay Ace.

Paakyat na ako ng aking kuwarto nang maalala ko ang tungkol sa company and the issue about my Dad’s project with the Ventura. I looked down as I think of it. I want to ask Mom and Dad but my instincts say no. Dahil alam kong hindi rin nila iyon sa akin sasabihin.

Nauna na akong umakyat at naiwan ko silang dalawa sa living room na umiinom ng tea.

The next day came. I woke up late. Kinuha ko ang cellphone kong nasa side table. Then I saw Ace messages for me.

Ace:

Blair, let’s talk. I want to clarify things to you.

Ace:

Please, Blair. I will go there.

Ace:

I’m here at your house now. Please talk to me.

That is one of his texts yesterday. His new message to me was,

Ace:

Good morning, baby. I hope we can talk later. I miss you.

Hindi naman na iba sa akin ang mga ganito niyang mensahe. Pero hindi ko matanggap na ang mga ’yon ay wala rin naman palang katotohanan.

Napapikit ako nang mariin at naibaba ko nalang sa side table ko ang aking phone.

Pababa na ako ng hagdan at natigilan ako sa paghakbang nang makita ang maraming tauhan naming nagkalat sa labas at loob ng bahay. This is the first time that we put our security here inside our house. Kaya naman nagtataka ako kung bakit nandito silang lahat.

Kaya naman nang matanaw ko si Mom na nakaupo na sa dining room. Nilapitan ko siya at nagtatakang humalik sa kaniyang pisngi.

“Morning Mom, bakit nandito ang mga tauhan natin? Is there something wrong?” Tanong ko.

Then I sat on my chair.

“We just need our security hija. Marami kasi ngayong problema ang kumpanya. May magbabantay din sa ’yong isang bodyguard sa school.”

Nagulat naman ako sa sinabi ni Mom. But I don’t want to complain if this is for my sake. I don’t want them to get worried about me kaya hindi na ako nagtanong pa at umapila.

Kumain nalang ako ng breakfast at naghanda na sa pagpasok. Wala ulit si Daddy sa hapag kanina. Marahil maaga na naman siyang pumasok sa kaniyang trabaho.

Manong parked the car in our school parking lot. Doon na ako nagpahatid dahil ayaw kong maglakad at makasalamuha ang mga nanghuhusganf mga tingin ng aking mga kamag-aral if I dropped there at the front gate.

My bodyguard was in my back as I walked towards my department. I told him that he can just stay outside my room or if they can, just hide and don’t come near me dahil alam kong magiging agaw pansin itong pagsunod niya sa akin.

Nasa akin pa rin ang paningin ng iba habang naglalakad ako. Iniyuko ko na lamangang aking ulo habang tinatahak ang daan patungong senior high building.

Napansin kong halos lahat sila ay nakatingin sa bodyguard ko na nasa aking likuran nang paakyat na ako ng second floor. May ilan pa akong naririnig na tuloy pa rin ang bulungan kahit na madaanan ko ang gawi nila.

I get inside our room and I take my seat as I ignored my classmate’s glares at me. Maica was there sitting next to Jean again when I looked for her. She didn’t even take a glance at me when I entered.

Mag-isa ako ngayong nakaupo sa madalas naming pag pwestuhan nila Maica dito sa loob ng cafeteria nang mag break-time.

But when I saw Sean and Clark walking towards me. Mabilis akong napangiti. But the smile on my lips gradually fades when they walk past through me. I assume that it was me they were about to approach.

Nilagpasan nila ako na para bang hindi nila ako nakita at dirediretsong tinungo ang lamesa nila Maica kasama si Jean sa kabilang lamesa.

I sighed loudly when I saw their group. And later on, I decided to just stand up and walked away.

The lunch came at gano’n pa rin ang nangyari. Tuluyan na nila akong iniwasan at hindi na pinansin pa.

I am at the library when I felt my phone vibrated. I decided to just go here instead of walking around alone. Kinuha ko ito at nakita ko ang isang mensahe.

Awtomatikong nangunot ang aking noo nang makita kong unregistered ang numero.

Unknown number:

Your family is a disgrace. You ruined everything, our company, and my entire life. I want you all gone. If he just never fell in love with you, this will not gonna happen.

Kinabahan ako nang mabasa ko ang mensaheng iyon.

I didn’t know if who it was, but I was horrified by his message. We do not have a fight with the other companies, so why do I receive this kind of death threat message. And what is this person saying? That someone fell in love with me and that’s the reason?

Binalik ko nalang sa bag ko ang aking cellphone at lumabas na ng library. Hindi na rin naman ako kinulit ni Ace sa mga messages niya.

He wanted to talk to me but I still didn’t want to. I was not ready to listen to him yesterday and up until now, I do not have the strength to listen to everything he has to say.

Pasakay na ako ng sasakyan namin nang biglang may humila ng buhok ko. Napasigaw naman ako sa sakit habang pilit na hinahawakan ang buhok ko palayo sa kung sino man ang nasa aking likuran.

“Ahh! Let go of my hair!” I exclaimed as I held back my hair.

Natigil lang ang taong nananabunot sa akin nang dumating ang bodyguard ko. I was catching my breath as I faced her.

And I was surprised to see Lisa’s face. Lukot ang damit nito at ang kaniyang buhok ay magulo. Her bold makeup and red lipstick were smudges. Nangangalumata rin siya, animong kulang sa tulog. At namamaga ang kaniyang mga mata dahil sa sobrang pag-iyak.

My bodyguard is holding both of her arms. She looked at me angrily. Her eyes narrowed on me gravely as if she was killing me in her mind.

“Walang hiya ka Blair! Talagang sinulot mo sa’kin si Ace sa simula pa lang! You were just a kid and you are already obsessed with Ace! Nakakadiri ka! You are too young to spit on him!” nanggagalaiting sabi niya.

Nagugulat naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. I can’t believe her! She hysterically came here just for that shit? She’s crazy!

“Lisa stop overreacting! I don’t like Ace anymore! At kung gusto mo siya, e’di isaksak mo na siya sa baga mo! Magsama kayong dalawa, mga manloloko!”

And if she thinks I flirted with Ace, it’s not my fault anymore. She should blame Ace and not me! Dahil si Ace ang nagloko at hindi ako.

Napupuyos ang aking dibdib sa sobrang pagkainis habang galit na galit na nakatingin sa akin si Lisa.

“You’ll pay for this, Blair. You will pay for this! Let me go! Get your hands off me!” Lisa screamed as she wildly fled her arms away on my bodyguard.

Binitiwan naman siya ng bodyguard ko at saka ako saglit na tinitigan nang matalim bago siya nanggagalaiting umalis. I let a heavy sigh before I went inside the car.

Lisa is really crazy over Ace. And Ace cheated on her, kaya ako ngayon itong kinokumpronta ni Lisa. Hindi ko alam kung totoo bang may relasyon sila o wala. I just concluded it all. Pero sapat ng ebidensya ang litrato nilang dalawa ni Ace na naghahalikan.

The way Lisa held his nape and gripped his shirt. It was all enough for me to think that they are on the same page.

Napalingon ako sa bintana nang mag-umpisa ng umandar ang aming sasakyan. Saglit pa akong natigilan nang makita ko si Ace na kakababa lang ng kaniyang sasakyan.

Napalingon lingon pa ito sa paligid at ng makita ang aming sasakyan ay nakapameywang niya kaming pinagmasdan.

Nakakunot ang noo nitong nakatingin sa sasakyan namin. Seryoso at madilim ang mga mata nito habang ang kaniyang bagang ay nakatiim. Nakita ko namang biglang dumating si Lisa at nilapitan siya nito.

I immediately looked away and didn’t watch what they will gonna do next dahil umandar na rin ang aming sasakyan. He might be embracing Lisa because she looked awful. Or he may get mad because I made her girl cried.

My phone vibrated. Agad ko namang kinuha iyon sa aking bag.

Ace:

I’m sorry, please let me explain to you everything.

I shut down my phone. So he’s not mad, or he just wants to shout at me instead of telling me what he was about to explain. Ayaw ko nang makarinig pa ng kahit anong galing sa kaniya.

Pagkarating ko ng bahay ay nandon pa rin ang nagkalat naming mga tauhan. Nakita ko si Dad na nakaupo sa living area at may kausap.

Namumukhaan ko ang lalaking kausap niya kaya hindi ko naiwasang hindi sila pagmasadan. And when I realize who he was, I blinked.

He’s our lawyer. Why is he here? Lumapit ako sa kanila para batiin sana.

“The issue here will not going to subside easily. We need a thorough investigation of it. Let the investigator handle it. For now, you should be focused on your funds. Ita-transfer niyo na bang lahat ng ito sa inyong anak?” I heard the lawyer said.

Dad noticed my way when I got there. Napatingin din sa akin ang kausap niya. May katandaan na rin ito. Maputi na ang kaniyang kilay at buhok.

“Anyway, this is my only daughter, Britney Clair Cortez.” Then Dad introduced me to him.

Magalang ko namang nginitian ang ginoo.

“Blair nalang po,” ani ko pa.

“This is attorney Bermudez, he’s our family lawyer.”

“Nice to meet you hija. By the way, how old are you?” attorney Bermudez asked.

“I’m turning eighteen, attorney,” I replied.

Napatingin naman siya kay Dad.

“Well the effectivity for her to attain it all when you transfer everything to her is when she reached her twenty-third birthday. That’s what you want right, Clarence?” tanong nito kay Dad.

Napakunot naman ang aking noo sa sinabi ni attorney. But when Dad glance at me saying that should I leave them for a moment, I kissed his cheeks before I leave them.

Umakyat na ako ng hagdan at pumasok na ng aking silid. Kakabihis ko lang nang marinig kong may kumakatok sa aking pintuan. At napatingin ako kay Mom nang pumasok siya.

“Hey sweety, how’s your day?” nakangiting tanong nito sa akin.

Napaiwas naman ako ng tingin sa kaniya. I don’t want them to know what happened lately. Hindi rin naman ako sanay na magkuwento sa kanila ng tungkol sa masasamang nangyari sa araw ko.

I was sitting on my bed. At lumubog ang kabilang side ng kama ko nang maupo si Mom sa tabi ko at marahang hinaplos ang aking pisngi.

Her eyes were softly staring at me while her soft hand caressed my cheeks subtly.

“People who love you will stay in your heart forever, Blair. They might be ignored and lied to you. I know you still want them to be part of this.” sabay turo ni Mommy sa kanyang dibdib. Pertaining her heart.

Napatingin naman ako sa kaniya. She then gave me a very heartfelt smile. I don’t know what she is saying about but when I realize it’s a rhyme about my situation, I felt my heart throbs.

“Someone who stays and someone who leaves. It’s part of our lives, sweety.”

Hindi ko alam kung bakit ganoon nalang ang lakas ng kabog ng aking dibdib nang sinabi iyon ni Mommy sa akin. Madalas niya akong pangaralan kaya hindi na bago ito sa akin.

“Just don’t let hatred envelop your heart, Blair.” She muttered softly.

Kinuha niya ang aking kamay at inalalayan ako palayo mula sa pagkakasandal sa headboard ng aking kama.

“Let’s go, let’s have our dinner sweety,” nakangiting aniya sa akin pagkaraan.

Tumayo naman na ako. Nakaramdam naman ako kahit papaano ng kakaibang saya dahil sabay sabay kaming kumain muli sa hapag. Hindi naman na nabanggit pa nila Mom at Dad ang tungkol sa problema sa kumpanya kaya hindi ko na rin sila tinanong pa.

Natapos kami sa pagkain and I were now lying in my bed. Hindi ako mapakali at nahihirapan ako sa pagtulog. I faced the ceiling and blankly looked at it.

At nang hindi pa rin ako dinadalaw ng antok ay dinampot ko nalang ang cellphone kong nasa side table. And as I opened it I saw Ace’s text. He’s really that persistent.

Ace:

I will go there tomorrow. We will fix this.

Hindi ko nalang pinansin ang kaniyang mensahe dahil ayaw ko ng pag-isipan pa iyon. We are done, and he should be happy that he’s now with Lisa.

Napadpad ako sa Facebook kalaunan and I notice that nothing special there. At napunta ako sa isang site pagkaraan nang magtungo ako ng Google discoveries. It was an article about Ventura Holdings and their upcoming project called OVH that caught my attention.

I click the site so I can read the article. Nabasa kong nagkaroon ng aberya between Clarence Cortez and Denver Ventura. Nagulat ako nang mabasa ang pangalan ni Dad do’n.

It states that the issue about their postponed project was due to a loss of money. And it said that it was all on hold by their financial marketing team and deposited by Mr. Clarence Cortez. The money is gone and nowhere to be found.

This is gonna be a big project that the Ventura’s will gonna launch after years. And it was all planned with their stockholder slash employee, architect Cortez. And pulled out because of this big problem.

Hindi ko na naituloy pa ang pagbabasa nang makita kong si Dad ang lumalabas at pinaghihinalaan nilang kumuha ng pera. May isa pa akong nakitang senator, it was senator Fuentes na nagsend daw ng proposal to Dad for another project, but Dad declined it. And they didn’t see it as a leaked.

So this is the reason why Maica, Sean, Clark, and Johnson avoiding me.

I believe that Dad is making an investigation about this all. Alam kong hindi niya ’yon magagawa lalo na sa pamilyang Ventura. He’s not that kind of person. He strives for us kaya naabot namin kung anong mayroon kami ngayon.

And what my classmates told me before was all a lie. Their family can’t just believe that my father is one of the closest friends of one of the richest families here in the country.

I closed my eyes and rest my mind. I put back my phone to where it is placed earlier and tried to calm myself about the issue I just read.

Kinabukasan ay tinanghali ako ng gising dahil halos anong oras na rin nang binisita ako ng antok. At napansin kong makulimlim ang panahon nang sumilip ako sa aking balkonahe.

And when my eyes caught my phone I took it and saw Ace messages for me again. But then, I ignored it. I stood up from my bed to went out of my room and have breakfast with my Mom and Dad.

Palabas na ako ng kuwarto ko nang may bigla akong marinig na tatlong magkakasunod na putok ng baril. Nagugulat at natigilan akong napatakip sa aking tainga at napayuko sa aking pwesto malapit sa pintuan.

My heart is beating so loud when I hardly realize that it was a loud thud of a gun. Napamulat ako ng mata nang maalala ko si Mommy at Daddy.

I hurriedly went out of my room and didn’t mind where it came from to went downstairs.

Ngunit napahinto ako sa pagtakbo at napaupong muli sa sahig dahil sa isa pang malakas na pagputok ng baril. Nakalabas na ako ng aking kwarto habang ang aking mga kamay ay nasa aking tainga.

Narinig ko pa ang ilang mga katulong namin na sumisigaw mula sa dining area. My mom and my Dad!

I’m freaked out and panicked because my parents must be in our dining. And when I tried to peak downstairs, I noticed that my Dad’s men were not all there. The maids are panicking and the guards were not here to look and guard us.

I heard a loud bang downstairs as I heard our things being broken. Nagkakagulo ang mga kasambahay namin habang naririnig kong nagkakandabasag ang ilang kagamitan namin sa ibaba.

Napatayo na ako sa sobrang pag-aalala kila Mom. Inalintana ko ang takot na nararamdaman sa aking dibdib dahil hindi ko na matagalan pa ang nangyayari.

At nang nasa hamba na ako ng hagdanan pababa sana ay agad na tumapon ang paningin ko sa lalaking may hawak ng baril.

Ace…

Hinahabol niya ang kaniyang hiningang ibinaba ang kaniyang kanang kamay kung saan naroon ang baril na kaniyang ginamit. He looked shocked and stunned to see me.

At nang mapatingin naman ako sa kaniyang harapan ay mabilis akong nanlamig. Naramdaman kong manginig ang mga kamay, tuhod at labi kong tiningnan kung sino iyong mga nakahandusay sa sahig.

At nang walang minutong lumipas ay mabilis na bumuhos ang mga luha kong naipon sa aking mga mata. Sobrang sakit at pighati ang naramdaman ko nang makita ko si Mom at Dad na nakahandusay sa sahig.

“Mom… Dad!” humahagulgol na ako sa pag-iyak habang nagkukumahog sa pagbaba ng hagdan.

At nang makababa ako ay mabilis akong napayakap sa kanilang dalawa.

Nagkalat ang dugo sa paligid. My Mom and Dad were bleeding. I hugged them both tightly as my tears were unstoppable. And when I felt they are not breathing, my chest immediately dwells in so much pain that I can’t take to believe that my parent’s eyes were now shut, and not breathing anymore.

Hindi ko alam kung ano ang gagawin ko nang mga oras na iyon. Natatakot at nanghihina ang loob ko na parang pinupunit ang buo kong pagkatao na makita ang mga magulang kong wala ng buhay na nakahandusay sa sahig.

“Mom… Dad please don’t leave me. Mommy, please wake up! Daddy….please! Gumising kayo, huwag niyo sa aking gawin ’to. Dad!”

Dinudurog ang puso ko habang yakap ko silang dalawa sa aking magkabilang braso. Nakahapit sa akin at wala ng buhay.

“No…No! No! This is not happening! Please, Dad… Mommy wake up! I love you so much. Don’t do this… Don’t leave me!” walang humpay sa pagbuhos ang aking mga luha at walang paglagyan ang bigat na nararamdaman ng aking dibdib.

I hugged my parents tightly as I cried in their dead bodies in my arms. My clothes were now stained by their blood and it breaks me more to see their bodies not moving anymore. Walang buhay at wala ng hininga.

“Dad! Mom! Hindi…hindi, pakiusap tulungan niyo ako! Mom, no, don’t leave me…” My voice was broken and very unknown to my hearing. My lips trembled as I cried and screamed in so much sorrow.

“Blair,” I froze when I heard his husky voice.

Then slowly I looked at the person in front of me. My eyes narrowed and piercing in anger as I darted my glares on him.

“You… Y-You killed them! Y-You killed my parents! Hinding hindi kita mapapatawad dahil sa ginawa mo! You’re evil! You should rot in hell!” walang humpay kong sigaw kay Ace habang ang mga mata ko ay walang tigil sa pagluha.

His eyes widened. His bloodshot eyes bore into me with the weary one. Bagsak ang balikat at nakaawang ang mga labing hindi makapaniwalang nakatingin sa akin ng may takot at pag-aalala.

“I-I didn’t shoot them, Blair…” He said in a very husky timid voice.

Napailing iling naman ako at hindi pinakinggan ang mga sinabi niya. My face was now full of tears as my body drowned in my parent’s blood.

Patuloy lang sa pagbuhos ang aking mga luha sa aking pisngi habang yakap yakap ng mahigpit sa aking magka-bilang bisig ang dalawang tao na nagbigay ng buhay sa akin. Ang dalawang tao na tangi at lubos kong minamahal.

“Mom… Dad…”

I wish this was all a nightmare. And I badly want to wake up. I badly want to wake up and pray that this would never happen.

Kabanata 28

Kabanata 28

Trust

I was scared and so sick of the things that happened to my life. It was the most excruciating pain that I ever felt when I held my Mom and Dad lying on the floor.

Lifeless and blood dripping on the floor.

I thought the moment I broke up with Ace is the most heartbreaking part but I was wrong. The pain is too much that I can die from it. It’s like a dagger that stabbed me straight in the chest seeing my parent’s lifeless body in my arms is killing me more.

My vision was blurred as I looked at the man who took the life of the people who gave me life.

Mas dumoble pa ang sakit sa isiping minsan ko ng minahal itong taong ito. And I did nothing but trust him.

“May pumasok sa bahay nila at hindi ko nakita ang hitsura. It’s a man wearing a mask.” pagkukwento ni Ace sa nangyari sa mga police.

“Sinungaling! I saw you killed my father, stop lying!” nagsusumidhing poot ang nararamdaman ko habang sinasabi ko iyon.

He didn’t say anything. He just clenched his jaw as he can’t seem to look in my way. I can’t believe him. I don’t want to believe that he really killed my parents but I saw it with my two naked eyes. And it’s hard to believe that he didn’t.

“I didn’t shoot your parents Blair. I once pulled the trigger on the murderer. Pero nakatakas pa rin siya.”

He’s good with playing guns. That was his favorite sport. He barely knows how to use it wisely. And for Pete’s sake! He’s a sharpshooter!

So why wouldn’t I be able to accuse him if that’s the case? I want justice for my parents and I can’t just let this slip.

Pero wala akong nagawa. Ventura is one of the richest here in the country. They are the most influential. They have a lot of connections that can cover up all their mess. I know them for years and Mr. Ventura is ruthless in the business industry.

Hindi ko alam kung ganti ba nila ito dahil sa ibinibintang nila kay Daddy. Pero sobra naman ’to masyado bilang paniningil nila.

Pera lang ang nawala sa kanila at wala akong pakialam kung gaano kalaki ’yon. Buhay ang kinuha nila sa akin at hindi ko ’yon matatanggap.

Walang pera ang makakatumbas sa halaga ng buhay ng isang tao. They are the only what I have. And now they are gone.

Ang kirot at pait ay hindi pa rin nawawala sa puso ko hanggang ngayon.

The media’s talked about the tragedy. The deaths of my father and my mother became the subject of newspapers and TV news.

Buong linggo at inabot nang buwan akong nagluluksa dahil sa nangyari. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa rin matanggap ang karumal dumal na pagkamatay ng aking ama at ina.

At hindi pa rin nahuhuli ang kriminal hanggang ngayon. The Ventura’s are helping us to find the killer.

Ace was always here in our house after the crime.

Hindi ko pa rin magawa siyang tingnan dahil alam kong siya naman talaga ang tunay na gumawa no’n sa aking mga magulang. But I can’t do anything except from hating and killing him in my mind.

Marami silang tauhan na nagbabantay na rin sa loob at labas ng bahay. Our bodyguards were worthless at that time. I don’t know if where they are and they arrived very late.

Nakakapanlumong isipin na marami rin kaming tauhan pero hindi pa rin pala iyon naging sapat para sa seguridad na meron kami. So that’s the reason why our guards are here.

Niyakap lang ako ni Manang Soling habang hinahatid ko sa huling hantungan ang aking mga magulang. Walang humpay sa pag-agos ang mainit kong mga luha sa aking pisngi.

Some of my Dad business partners, employees, friends, and even those people who known Dad and Mom for their kindness are all here. The charities and foundations that my Dad and Mom supporting are all here.

Sabay sabay kaming nagluksa. Pero alam kong kahit na sino man ang nandito ay hindi mapapantayan ang pighati at lungkot na nararamdaman ko.

Maulan ang panahon at sobrang dilim ng kalangitan, animong nakikiramay sa kalungkutang nararamdaman ko ngayon.

“Hija, halika na at umuwi na tayo.” ani ni Manang Soling habang hawak ang magkabila kong balikat.

I didn’t spoke. I was just silently staring at the grave of my parents.

Naramdaman ko namang hinigpitan nito ang pagkakahawak niya sa aking braso at saka umalis at hinayaan na muna ako.

Umalis na kanina pa ang mga taong nakipaglibing at nakiramay. They told me how good my parents were. They will never forget the kindness that my parents gave and helped to them. Even my Dad’s employees and associates and my Mom’s friends are all saying the same. That they are so good and a real kind people.

And hearing their stories about their encounter with my parents makes me feel so lucky to have wonderful parents like them. I will never forget how they comfort and loving me in every way. I don’t think that I can get used to living alone from now on, without them.

It tore me apart as I felt the hot tear rolled down my cheeks. I bit my lower lip to resist myself from sobbing.

Naramdaman ko namang may lumapit sa likuran ko.

“Blair, let’s go.” I heard Ace said in a deep voice.

Ang lakas ng buhos ng ulan at hindi pa rin ito tumitila. Kaming dalawa nalang ang narito dahil paalis na ang iba.

Agad naman akong nakaramdam ng galit sa kaniya. Hindi ko alam kung galit nga lang ba itong matatawag o kinamumuhian ko na siyang tunay.

Because I believe he’s the reason why this all happened. He broke my heart and now it can never be fixed again and can be restored to its former state.

Galit na galit ako, sa punto na kinasusuklaman ko na siya. I don’t want to see him anymore. He fooled and played me around. And the most painful thing is that he is the one I blame for the death of my parents.

I can never accept him in my life again.

I felt his hand touches my arm. Mabilis kong hinawi ang braso ko mula sa kaniyang pagkakahawak at nandidiring tumingin sa kaniyang mga mata.

He looked hopeless and painful as he gazes at me.

My eyes darted at him. I was fuming mad when I looked at him.

I never felt this fire inside me before. I have never been so angry with someone. I used to hold back and always avoid trouble because I did not want to have an enemy. And I just only bow my head when I feel the mocking look they have on me. I lived in a quiet and peaceful world that I created myself. I want to get out now. I want now to live in this cruel reality.

“Don’t… Don’t you ever touch me. I hate you! Kinasusuklaman kita dahil sa ginawa mo sa akin at sa pamilya ko. You’re a living monster that I don’t ever want to see.” lumuluhang sinabi ko sa kaniya.

His bloodshot eyes bore in the ground.

Lumakas ang buhos ng ulan habang magkaharap kaming dalawa. Napatingin ako sa likuran ko kung nasaan ang libingan ng mga magulang ko.

They are now gone. And I am alone now.

“Blair, please stop doing this. You know I can’t do that. I respect your Mom and Dad, so please stop freaking blaming me!” nauubusan ng pasensya niyang ani.

Hinarap ko naman siya.

“Kung hindi ikaw, sino?! Where’s that fucking evil who killed my Mom and Dad?!”

He clenched his jaw. At nagtatangis ko naman siyang tiningnan sa mga mata.

“You didn’t watch the footage. I’ll show and proved to you that you’re blaming the wrong person.”

Napailing-iling naman ako sa kaniya.

“Stop pretending that you’re helping me. I know you better now. You’re a liar and a fucking cheater! And you played me very well!”

“Damn it! Fuck!” he groaned out of frustration.

Napahawak pa siya sa kaniyang ulo. He massaged the bridge of his nose. He seems controlling himself for not bursting out.

“What are you saying, Blair? I’m loyal to you and yet you didn’t believe me. I’m trying to explain my side but what did I get from you? Huh? You are ignoring me. You’re avoiding all my messages for you.” napailing-iling pa siya.

My brows furrowed as I glared at him.

“Stop putting the blame on me, Ace! You just pretend that you liked me. Wala pa lang kwenta yung dinner date na hinanda mo. You know what? I didn’t actually enjoy that night.”

Nagulat naman siyang napatingin sa akin. Nanlalaki ang mga matang hindi makapaniwala sa sinabi ko.

His lips parted. I saw how his jaw moved when he gritted his teeth.

“Halika na Blair. I know you’re just-”

“No! I want you to know that I didn’t really like you back.”

“Shut up, Blair. You just want to get even.” matiim na nakatingin siya sa akin.

I chuckled fakely.

“I’m not, Ace because that is the truth. That I was disgusted by your kisses and by your hold on me that night. I feel dirty for myself that I let you get inside me. I regret that I let you that night.”

His bloodshot eyes widen a fraction as his jaw clenched, taming himself. I saw how the pain strikes his redden eyes for a second.

“I didn’t like it. And all your efforts don’t make any sense to me Ace. It’s all cringe and too dramatic. I don’t like it…And I will never like it.”

Slowly, I felt my heart drowned by anger. The only thing I know is that it’s hard to cease the fire.

Nakita ko naman siyang bumagsak ang tingin sa lupa bagsak ang parehong balikat.

“Gano’n ba? Then, I’m sorry if you didn’t like it. I’m sorry for kissing you. I’m sorry for getting you that night. Kung alam ko lang na disgusted ka sa halik ko, hindi ko nalang sana ginawa.” he said in a deep husky voice.

Nakakuyom ang kamao niya ng tumingin siya sa akin. And I was stunned when I saw his bloodshot eyes. That a lone tear rolled down to his cheeks.

He frustratedly licked his lips. Damn man. I hate his effect on me. He already hurt me and it’s enough. I want him to stop. Seeing him this way makes me feel like I shouldn’t have done this. But thinking about what he caused and the damage to my family, making me realize that what I am doing is just only right.

“Yeah, you should be sorry. And what you’ve done to my parents? Kulang pa ang sorry mo. Hinding hindi kita mapapatawad. You’re a freaked evil monster that ruined my life. And I want you gone… I badly want you gone, Ace.”

Tinalikuran ko siya ng may kirot at pighati sa puso ko pagkatapos sabihin iyon sa kaniya ng walang inhibisyon. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako nasasaktan nang makita ko siyang luhaan.

Mas masakit ang ginawa niya sakin kaya hindi dapat ako magpaapekto sa kaniya. I don’t want to see him after all of this. I’ll prove them that Ace Holden Ventura killed the persons who gave me life.

At kung hindi ko mapapatunayan ’yon, I’ll put justice in my hand. I want them to pay. I want them to feel how to be this broken to the point that they no longer want to.

I want to ruin him. I want him gone…

“Blair… please, bawiin mo ang mga sinabi mo.” Hindi ko inasahang pahabol niyang sinabi sa akin.

Nakalayo na ako sa tent at nauulanan na ngayon. Parehas na kaming naliligo sa ulanan at basang basa ang aming mga kasuotan. Nananatili akong nakatalikod sa kaniya at wala akong balak siyang harapin.

“Please, Blair. Put me in jail if that’s what makes you happy. But just take it back, I can’t stand your words. You’re just mad kaya mo ’yon nasasabi.” he voice sound in pleaded.

Mas dumoble pa ang punyal na nakatarak sa puso ko nang sinabi niya iyon. I love this man but he’s not healthy to me. My world is different from him. We’re not meant for each other.

And I can’t forgive him. I will never forgive him. The embers inside me begin to flame when the face of my Mom and Dad flashed in my mind.

“You better go now in jail and never bail. That’s what you deserve.” I coldly muttered without looking at him back.

I started to walk in the middle of the rain.

“Baby, please…” Dinig ko ang hinang hina na niyang sinabi.

I did not stop walking and I just ignored him. Ang sakit sakit at ang bigat bigat na ng loob ko.

In extreme pain, I feel like I have lost my consciousness. I can’t feel anything. I’m getting numb by the cold wind as the rain showered me unrelentingly. And by the pain I feel in my heart, it’s weakening me. It’s slowly dying my system.

Pumasok ako ng aming sasakyan na basang basa ng ulan at tulala lang sa kawalan. I leave Ace. Because he wasn’t really there for me in the first place. He just fooled me. And now he ruined the family I only have.

“Blair, hija. Kumain ka na muna. Baka magkasakit ka niyan.” Manang Soling worriedly said to me.

Napabangon ako sa aking higaan at pinagmasdan ang pinto ng aking kuwarto. Kanina pa kumakatok si Manang at wala akong lakas para bumangon at tumayo para pagbuksan siya.

“Hija, sigi na. At kailangan mong magpalakas.” Dinig kong ani pa niya mula sa nakasarado kong pintuan.

I let a heavy sigh before I stood up. Nakita ko si Manang na may dalang tray. I open the door for her. She then gave me a soft smile as her eyes scanning me in sorrow. She put the tray on my side table nang tuluyan na siyang makapasok ng aking silid.

Naupo naman ako sa aking kama.

“Salamat po, Manang.” Mahina at walang sigla kong ani.

“Walang anuman. Ilang araw ka na ring hindi lumalabas ng silid mo. Baka magkasakit ka na niyan. Madalas kang dito kumakain sa loob ng kuwarto mo. Ayaw mo bang don sa dining?”

“Sigi po lalabas po ako mamaya, magpapahangin po ako sa veranda.” Tanging ani ko nalang kay Manang.

Manang Soling smiled at me. She looked at ease for what I’d said.

“Sigi, ipaghahanda kita ng cookies at juice. May gusto ka pa bang iba?”

“Wala naman po, salamat.” I slightly smiled at her.

At kalaunan ay lumabas na si Manang ng kuwarto ko. I looked at the food that she prepared for me. It’s my breakfast.

Simula nang mawala sila Mom at Dad ay hindi na ako kumain pa sa dining table namin. Our dining was too spacious and the table was too big for me.

At tanging naaalala ko lang sila sa tuwing uupo ako sa aking upuan. Our happy memories there will just strike me in grief more. And it will hurt me thinking that they will not gonna be here to dine with me. Until I will end up crying, and leaving the dining room without eating anything.

That’s why I choose to eat here instead, inside my room. It’s been a month now and I’m still mourning. Hindi pa rin nahahanap ang taong bumaril sa mga magulang ko.

Ilang beses ko ng sinabi na si Ace ang nakitang kong may hawak ng baril sa mga pulis na nag-iimbistiga pero wala akong napala.

I tried to fight in court but nothing happened.

Ipinakita lang nila ang CCTV footages ng bahay namin mula sa loob at labas at nakita ngang may pumasok sa amin at binaril ang mga magulang ko. Saktong pagdating ko sa mga oras na iyon ay nagpaputok si Ace. Kaya siya ang naabutan ko at pinagkamalang bumaril.

At first, I don’t want to believe the footage. It can be edited or what. Pero sa huli they said that it was the truth. That is what really happened.

Pero hindi ko pa rin tinanggap iyon. I know that his father is accusing my Dad of their postponed project. I read all the articles about it. At hindi ko maiwasang mapansin na nali-linked sa issue na iyon si senator Fuentes.

He seems closed now to Ventura.

And that captivates my attention. Maybe Mr. Ventura planned it all. At pinalabas na may ibang pumatay sa mga magulang ko kahit na siya naman talaga ang puno’t dulo niyon.

And now the suspect is securely hiding somewhere at hindi pa rin nahahanap ng mga awtoridad. And one possible reason kaya hindi nila iyon mahanap ay may taong sumusuporta rito.

I’m sure it’s an influential family that helps the suspect. At walang iba kundi ang mga Ventura na may tanging kakayahan lang na gumawa niyon.

I did not know that this is the kind of filth and chaos that belongs to the elites. We are not one of them but we are affected by their troubles.

Lumabas nga ako ng hapong iyon at nagpahangin sa veranda. Nakatingin ako sa mga bulaklak ni Mom sa hardin na ngayon ay wala na. It still has a plant there but it’s not my Mom’s plant anymore.

I looked at the clear blue sky and breathe heavily.

Naiiyak pa rin ako sa tuwing maaalala ko ang nangyari sa mga magulang ko. It was a nightmare to me that I don’t want to remember. Halos isang buwan na rin akong lumiban sa klase. It’s now sembreak and the Christmas is near.

I felt a pain in my chest as I remembered our plan to go abroad and celebrate Christmas and New Year there. It was now a just dream for me. A dream that will never gonna happened.

Kung gaano kabilis lumipas ang mga araw ay ganon naman kabagal humupa ang lungkot sa aking puso. Nando’n pa rin ang galit ko sa mga Ventura at hindi na ’yon mawawala pa.

After my farewell goodbye to Ace, ay hindi na siya ulit pang nagpakita sa akin. Note, it was sarcasm.

His Mom and Dad were there at the burial of my parents. They approached me and said their deepest condolences to me. But I didn’t buy their dramas.

I may be that rude that time pero umalis ako at iniwan sila ron. I do not want to see the people who caused the death of my parents. If the scandal didn’t come out about that bullshit project of the Ventura, it will not gonna happen.

Maraming naiwan si Dad nang mawala siya. One of those is our company. It is now managed by the Ventura Holdings because it’s under them.

Hindi ko pa naman iyon maaasikaso sa ngayon. And I know nothing about the management. At na build din naman iyon ni Daddy sa tulong ng Ventura Estate so it will gonna fall back to them also in time.

Natapos ang taon na hindi ko naramdaman ang saya. Marahil nangungulila pa rin ako sa kanila. It’s January and I attended my class.

I noticed my schoolmate’s stares are not that judgemental anymore. They looked at me with pity in their eyes. The tragedy that happened about our family is scattered by the newspaper and some personal sights. Kaya hindi na ako nagulat pa sa tingin na iginagawad nila sa akin ngayon.

Hindi naman na ako yumuko at taas noo akong naglakad patungo ng building namin.

Shyness and fear are not on the list of my vocabulary now. I left it the moment I decided to be tough and independent when my parents died. I don’t even need their sympathy. They’re just acting as if they have really cared about it.

I entered our classroom gracefully.

Dire diretso akong naglakad papunta sa upuan ko. I have my activities and homework that I study last year before I decided to take it as my home study. Kaya hindi ako late sa mga lessons na ita-tackle namin ngayon.

I need to study hard now. I need to improve and study everything I have to learn. For the company that Dad left for me. I will not let them take the responsibility for that, especially that I know they are the only ones who will benefit from it. I will not allow that to happen.

“Blair…” I heard her voice beside me.

Hindi ako bumaling ng tingin sa kaniya.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry for what happened. Please talk to me. You know that I’m your friend right?” Maica said.

Her friend? That’s it. People change and choose to be who they wanted to be. I badly need them that time, pero nasaan sila. They chose to be who they are. They did not want to get involved in my family’s trouble so they chose to avoid me.

There’s no wrong in choosing what you are protecting. What is wrong is that turning away your back from the person who trusted you and you choose to leave her just for your own safety. That’s selfishness and being lame.

“Uyy, Blair. Bati na tayo oh.”

I looked at her straight in the eye. Grief, sadness, and raw anger have built up my self-confidence. They can’t blame me for being like this.

Bahagya pa siyang nagulat sa paraan ng pagtingin ko.

I smiled, faked.

“Yeah, we’re good.” I then just simply said, lifeless with my face in just a stoic expression.

Umupo naman siya sa tabi ng aking upuan. Sa dati niyang puwesto. At mukhang hindi inalinta ang panlalamig at pag-iwas na gusto kong mangyari.

“My parents told me to avoid you, so I ignored you and avoided you even though I knew I could not. I’m sorry.” She was weary as she explained it to me.

“So where are you?”

Nagtataka naman siyang napatingin sa akin.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“I thought you couldn’t resist me? Nasaan ka nung kailangan ko ng kaibigan? I thought we were friends. Do you really are?” I asked her softly.

She was shocked when I said that. I don’t get her reaction anyway. It’s not that what I’m expecting from her.

“Blair, I’m really sorry. I hope you can forgive me. We are friends. And friends are always there for each other-”

“It’s just a word. Nothing will happen if you do not take an action like just what you did to me, Maica.”

Magsasalita pa sana siya pero dumating na ang aming guro. Nag-iwas ako sa kaniya ng tingin at tuwid lang na tumingin sa aking harapan. Madalas na rin akong mapansin ng aming guro at ng iilan kong kaklase dahil sa pagiging active ko sa discussion. As I said, I have to give my best and learn everything if I have to.

They also noticed my hair. Mula sa mahaba at may pagkaalon and dulo ng aking buhok ay pinagupitan ko ito ng lagpas hanggang balikat. Konti lang naman ang nabawas. And I also straightened my hair to looked more stronger and sophisticated than my wavy hair before.

“Sabay na tayong magtungo sa cafeteria.” nag-aalangan man ay nakangiti pa ring anyaya sa akin ni Maica.

I looked at her. She became my friend after all. So why not. But I just won’t treat her like what I used to. And I can’t promise that we will bond the same way again.

“Sure,” seryoso at tipid ko lang na sinabi.

Her smile grew wider as we went out of our classroom.

Pumasok kami ng cafeteria at gaya ng nakasanayan ay nakatingin silang lahat sa akin. Pero ang naiba ngayon ay hindi na ako yumuyuko na para bang hiyang hiya ako sa sarili ko.

I ignored their stares and walked over to the counter. Maica was behind my back. At nang pagkatapos kong makuha ang order ko ay napahinto ako sa paglalakad.

“Hey, Blairy pity, sympathy. All the awful things are all for you.” Elena started. Angela was beside her, kasama ang dalawang alagad ni Elena.

“Hey, Elena inggetera, laitera. All the bitches word are all for you.” pagbati ko naman sa kaniya ng may nakakalokong ngiti.

I felt Maica’s hand in my arms.

“Blair, let’s go,” she whispered behind me.

Napamaang naman si Elena sa sinabi ko. I didn’t flinch and just eyed her narrowly.

“Buti nga sayo at nawalan ka ng magulang. You’re so pitiful. And all of that is because of your user father. He really took the money from the Ventura and now it is your karma. Huhu, condolences.”

Her words were foul. It was out of the line. My lips formed in a grim as I walked closer to her. Nakita ko namang manlaki ng bahagya ang kaniyang mga mata.

“Back off bitch. You don’t know me, so better you shut up. Baka gusto mong kumalat lahat ng sex video mo sa buong campus or… I’ll post it in all social media sites that can ruin you and your…family.” I then whispered to her languidly.

Her eyes literally widened as she glared at me. She almost gulped when I took another step to her.

“That can be your karma from being a pervert.” Seryoso at mariin kong sinabi na nagpatigil sa kaniya.

At nang balingan ko naman ng tingin ang mga kasamahan ni Elena. Hindi nakatakas sa aking paningin ang hindi makapaniwalang mga mata ni Angela na nakatunghay sa akin. Ani mong natigilan siya sa aking ekspresyon at pananalita.

Tinalikuran ko na sila ng may napupuyos na galit sa mga mata ni Elena at hindi na nilingon pa pabalik. Natanawan ko naman ang table kung saan naroon sina Sean, Clark at Johnson. It was Sean who called me.

Tinungo namin ni Maica ang table na kinaroroonan nila. It was our usual spot here.

Hindi ko naman namalayan ang kakaibang tingin sa akin ni Maica. It seems like she can’t believe that I’m like this now.

“Blair, I’m sorry for avoiding you. And I sympathize with what happened. Sorry for not being there on your side. I am really sorry. Hindi man lang kita nalapitan ng pumunta kami sa inyo. Nahihiya kase akong lumapit sa’yo dahil sa ginawa namin.” Clark said.

Ganon rin si Sean. Tahimik lang si Johnson na nakatingin sa akin. He didn’t say anything.

I can do nothing because it’s already happened. All I can do now is to distrust people I think I can trust.

I smiled at them without any life and humor on it and didn’t say anything. Tahimik lang din nila akong pinagmasdan.

Genuine friendship is to be able to know someone enough and to trust them enough to be with them in their toughest times is a sign of a real friendship.

Pero paano ko pang pagkakatiwalaan ang mga kaibigan kong minsan na akong tinalikuran. Maybe I am dealing now with my hard time in trusting someone.

Trust… I think it’s hard for me to trust someone again. And even these people, I don’t think I can give them the trust that they once break.

Kabanata 29

Kabanata 29

Wait for my return…

It was summer. Nasa bahay lang ako buong araw. Lumalabas para magpahangin sa veranda o ’di kaya naman ay sa balkonahe ng aking silid.

“Where is Britney Clair Cortez? Is she here?” narinig kong ani mula sa sala.

Nakita ko si Manang Soling na abala sa pag-aasikaso sa kanila. I was looking at the person wearing his corporate attire. I think I saw him before. I just can’t remember where I actually saw him.

Lumapit ako sa kanila at napatingin sa gawi ko ang dalawang kasama niya.

They are holding their briefcase.

“Ah Blair, gusto ka raw nilang makausap.” Manang Soling said.

“Have a seat,” aniyaya ko sa kanila nang tuluyan ko silang maharap.

Nagtataka ako sa presensiya nila rito sa aming bahay. Ilang buwan na rin ang nakalipas ng mamatay sila Mom at Dad. Bihira nalang din ang pumunta rito’ng mga katrabaho nila at ilang mga papeles na inilalakad sa akin.

I had a lot of problems during those times especially when I was about to graduate my grade eleven.

Dad owed a lot of debt to various companies. Others have left and taken their investment. Kaya ang ilang funds ko na iniwan nila para sa pag-aaral ko ay nagalaw ko para ipambayad do’n.

Hindi ko inaasahan na may gano’n pala si Daddy. Na magkakaroon siya ng pinagkakautangan. Naisip ko nalang na ito ay ’yong minsan nang pinag-awayan nila ni Mommy.

I had heard them before but it was not clear to me.

“Andito kami para sabihin sa’yong itong mansion niyo nalamang ang pwedeng maging kabayaran ninyo sa amin.” The man directly said to me.

I looked at him in alarm. Then lately my eyebrows met in line.

“Pwede rin ang kumpaniya ninyo ang maging kabayaran. Lalo na at hindi mo pa naman iyon kayang pamahalaan.” anang isa.

“Who are you again?” nagtitimping tanong ko nang matantong wala akong ideya sa mga sinasabi niya at kung sino ang nagpadala sa kaniya rito ngayon.

I respect him because he’s older than me. Pero ang mga sinasabi niyang hindi ko maintindihan ay ang nakakapagpainit ng ulo ko.

The Ventura is now moving for sure. Maybe this is one of their plans. Are they still not satisfied with what they got from us? They killed my parents and now this is what they are doing? Taking all my father’s realties?

Pinagmasdan kong inilabas ng kasamahan niyang lalaki ang mga papeles at saka iyon iniabot sa akin.

“Ipinadala ako rito ni senator Fuentes, sa kaniya talaga may utang ang iyong ama. And he just suggested this as an offer for you, hija. We know that you already pay the debts to the other companies, but we don’t want you to forget about your Dad’s debt to senator Fuentes. It’s about time for you to pay us.”

Binasa ko ang nakasulat roon. Hindi ko masabi kung totoo ba iyon o hindi.

“How will I know if this is true?” I asked them.

Naglabas pa ng isang folder ang isang lalaki.

“Here’s the contract of your Dad with the senator. And it truly said there that your father has a debt.”

Kinuha ko iyon at nakita ko ngang naroon ang pirma ni Dad. I read the contract and it was legit. And the money is worth thirty million. For Pete’s sake, where can I get that?

Napapikit ako ng mariin habang iniisip ng maigi kung ano pa ba ang pwede naming maipangbayad. Wala na nga ang mga sasakyan namin dahil naipasanla ko ng lahat ng iyon.

At ang mga kasambahay namin ay dadalawa na lamang.

“We just want to inform you that you need to decide before this week ends. It’s either your company or this mansion.” tumayo na sila at saka ako saglit na tiningnan at kalaunan ay dirediretso na ring lumabas.

The hell! They just came here for that bullshit of crap? Hinding hindi ko talaga mapapatawad ang mga Ventura. They got everything we have and now I have nothing. Nothing is left on me.

Nagawa pa nila akong gipitin dahil alam nilang ganito ang sitwasyon ko! And I think they do that because they knew I know nothing about the company. Aren’t they still satisfied with their companies and even ours will be taken over?

Under na nga nila kami at halos sila na ang nagmamay-ari niyon tapos gusto pa nilang tuluyang angkinin ang kumpanyang iniwan sa akin ni Dad?

How cruel they are! I’ll get them pay for this!

I call my attorney after they left. I told the attorney to come over and I’ll talk to him about everything that can be our subject option for the debt of my Dad.

It cannot be our mansion and not, even more, our company. I can’t just resist it to just give it right away.

I just don’t want to lose this special place where Mom and Dad made for me. The place where I live. The place where I started to learn. The place where Mom and Dad’s memories are still alive. This is our home. But now it’s just a normal house because they were now passed away.

Pero hindi ko pa rin hahayaang kahit ang bahay na ito ay mapunta sa kanila.

“Hija, huwag mo masyadong alalahanin ang lahat ng ito. Makakahanap rin tayo ng solusyon para riyan.” Manang Soling said to me. Hinaplos pa niya ng bahagya ang aking likuran.

Nakakataba ng puso na hindi niya ako iniwan kahit alam niyang wala na akong maibibigay sa kaniya. She’s loyal to our family. And I’m thankful to have her. Tipid lang akong ngumiti sa kaniya.

At nang maghapon na ay saka pa lang dumating si attorney. Saglit pa akong natigilan sa gulat nang makita ang kasama niya. Naupo ako sa sofa at inanyayahan siyang maupo na rin. Hindi ko naman binalingan ng tingin si Ace na tahimik lang na nakatayo sa kaniyang tabi.

Ilang buwan na rin simula nang huli kaming magkita. Agad akong nakaramdam ng galit na makita ko siya ngayong nakaupo sa aking harapan.

Presensiya niya pa lang ay hindi na ako kumportable. Mabilis na nag-iinit ang aking dugo dahil sa kaniya.

“Ace, hijo andito ka pala. Anong ginagawa mo rito? May balita na ba tungkol sa imbestigasyon?” I heard Manang asked him.

Hindi ko naman maiwasang mainis. Manang believes that the killer is not Ace. And that’s the truth actually. Pero ang totong may pakana no’n ay ang kaniyang pamilya. So it doesn’t change the fact that they killed my parents.

Wala naman ng ibang magtatangka pa sa buhay ng mga magulang ko kung hindi ang pamilya lang niya. His father was mad to my Dad because of what happened. At kahit pa sinabing tiningnan na nila ang lahat ng anggulo, si Dad pa rin ang inintriga nila.

When my parents died, the issue about their postponed project and the loss of their funds was subsided. Hindi na ako nakarinig ng issue tungkol ron. It can be just their show but it’s my parents life. Their accusations can be the possible cause of their death. Dahil hindi mangyayari iyon kung hindi talaga lahat ito pinlano bilang ganti sa amin.

“Attorney, can you show me all the assets we only have?” I asked him avoiding Ace’s stares at me.

“I’m sorry Blair, pero wala ng natitira. Iilan lang ang nakita kong assets ng iyong ama at lahat ng iyon ay naipambayad na natin. All we have is that your company and this mansion.”

“But the money they want is worth thirty million. Saan po ako kukuha ng gano’ng kalaking pera?” napabuntong-hininga pa ako sa kakaisip kung ano ang maaari kong gawin.

“You can give them this mansion. It also doesn’t help you. Your company is the most helpful asset to you, kaya huwag mo yung hayaang mapunta sa kanila.”

Napaisip naman ako. I’m a sentimental person and if I’ll going to choose between the two. I’ll choose this mansion to be saved.

Wala naman na akong magagawa pa at kailangan ko ng makaisip ng paraan.

“What’s the problem?” biglang singit ng baritonong boses niya.

Tinapunan ko naman siya ng masama kong tingin. He just seriously stared at me.

“She needs the money before this week ends. Kailangang mabayaran niya sila senator Fuentes.” attorney said to Ace.

Nag-iwas naman siya ng tingin sa akin.

What is he doing here anyway? Is he here to check on me if I still have anything? To check if I still have money? Sorry to say but you all get it. I have nothing now.

“I can lend you a money-” he muttered that I abruptly cutted off.

“Shut up! I don’t need your filthy money. And stop acting that you care. Ano? Nagdiriwang na ba kayo ngayon dahil ubos na lahat ng meron ako? Are you even satisfied or still not?!” habol ko na ang aking hininga ng sinabi ko iyon.

Mabilis na nagbadiya ang luha sa aking mga mata kahit pa nanlalaban at sobrang riin nitong nakatitig sa kaniya.

He clenched his jaw before he looked away. Hindi naman ako nag-iwas ng tingin at matalim ko lang siyang tinitigan.

“I will give them the company.” I then announced.

Nagugulat namang napatingin sa akin si attorney, gayundin si Manang Soling.

“You know I can help you with this, Blair. Just let me-”

“You have nothing say on this, Ace. It’s my decision and not yours.”

I guess it’s better to give them our company. Mas gugustuhin kong iba ang mamahala no’n kesa ang mga Ventura ang humawak. They got everything I have, and I won’t let them even get our company.

Umalis na si attorney at siya na raw ang bahala sa mga papeles at mga documents na kailangang ipasa at papirmahan sa mga stockholders at shareholders.

Umalis naman na muna si Manang at nagtungo sa kusina.

Ace was still there, standing in front of me. Hindi siya umupo simula ng dumating siya rito kanina pa.

I didn’t look at his way. Hindi ko masikmura siyang pagmasdan ng walang galit sa aking mga mata.

“We still doing our best to find the suspect-” I cut him off for the third time.

Ace was going here the last time to have and give us a report about my parent’s death. And he’s here again for me to report what he found out, which I can never acknowledge and accept because I know that they just cover it up.

I glared at him.

“You’re hiding him, because it was all planned out.” I accused.

Nakita kong kumuyom ang kaniyang kamao habang nakababa ang tingin sa sahig.

I stood up. He then immediately lifted his gaze on me.

“You can never find the suspect as long as you’re hiding him. The mouse will never come out as long as someone fed him. Like what you are doing now. You’re all the same. Pests.” I remarked.

Akmang tatalikod na ako paalis para sana iwan na siya nang hawakan niya ang aking palapulsuhan.

“Don’t you ever dare to hold me,” I sharply said as I narrowed my eyes on him.

Agad kong inalis ang kamay ko sa mahigpit niyang pagkakahawak sa akin. At saka nandidiring ginawaran siya ng tingin.

He looked in grief as I glared at him.

“I just want you to know that we’re doing our best. That we are helping you here. Hindi mo kami kalaban dito, Blair.”

I smirked at him with no humor in it.

“Oh, shut up! I know people like you. You fooled me once-”

“I need to go. I don’t want to hear it anymore. I’m tired of pleading and hearing those laments from you.” He then uttered that made me astounded.

“Then leave! Who said that I need you?” pasiring akong umalis sa harapan niya.

That brute is really getting into my nerves. Pumanhik na ako patungo sa aking silid at do’n nagkulong.

Napunta nga ang kumpanya sa pamamahala ni senator Fuentes. Pinuntahan niya pa ako rito sa mansion para sa kasunduan. At labag man sa loob ko ay wala na akong ibang pamimilian.

I don’t want to choose the latter one, which is the Ventura’s help. My ego will definitely get hurt if I take it. My pride is too high to accept Ace’s offer to me.

I go to school for my grade twelve. Lumipat ako ng ibang paaralan pero sa pribado pa rin. I take their entrance exam and I passed it. I was their scholar in their school.

Malaki rin ang naitulong niyon sa akin dahil wala na akong maipambayad ng tuition ko sa dati kong school kaya mas pinili ko nalang na lumipat. Hindi ako masyadong nakihalubilo sa mga estudyante at nag-focus ako sa pag-aaral.

I woke up, Saturday morning. Nakita ko ang mensahe ni Maica sa akin. Hindi ko na sila nakausap simula ng lumipat ako ng ibang paaralan.

I always keep my distance from them. In short, I actually cut the strings between us, a long time ago. They are my friends but I do not trust them anymore.

Maica:

Let’s hang out, sa cafe? Tomorrow afternoon. Sa madalas nating puntahan. Please join us, okay? The boys will be there too. We missed you :)

Hindi ako nagreply. Inilapag ko lang iyon sa aking lamesa. Lumabas ako ng aking balkonahe at naupo ako sa couch at saka mahinang napabuntong-hininga.

Tumayo rin ako pagkaraan at saka tumingin sa ibaba ng bahay. Napakunot agad ang aking noo nang may makita akong mga tauhan sa tapat ng aming mansion.

Pababa pa lang ako ng hagdan ay nakita ko na agad ang may edad ng lalaki na nakatalikod sa aking gawi na nakatayo sa aming living area.

“Hija, gising ka na pala.” bahagyang gulat pa na sinabi ni Manang Soling sa akin.

“Sino po sila?” kuryosong tanong ko.

Hindi ko maiwasang tingnan ng masama ang mga tauhang ito. May posibilidad na isa nanaman sila sa pinagkakautangan ni Dad at nandito para maningil. Wala na kaming maipang babayad pa sa kanila at wala na rin akong kayang maiibibigay pa.

Ngumiti naman si Manang Soling sa akin na hindi ko inasahan. Animong masaya siya at nandito ang ginoo.

My forehead creased as I looked at his back. Hindi pa niya ako hinaharap dahil masiyado itong abala sa pakikipag-usap sa kaniyang mga tauhan.

Nilapitan naman ako ni Manang at saka niya ako inalalayan patungo sa gawi ng ginoo.

I was surprised to see the guards he talked to, were scattered inside and outside our mansion. At nang humarap ito sa aking gawi ay nagulat ako nang makita ang itsura nito.

“U-Uncle?” naluluhang ani ko.

“Blair. I’m sorry-” hindi na nito naituloy pa ang sasabihin niya dahil agad ko na siyang tinakbo at sinalubong ng yakap.

I cried as I hugged him tightly. He’s not here when Mom and Dad passed away. He’s the only person I have now as my family. Kaya sobra ang sayang nararamdaman ko nang makita ko siya.

He’s my uncle on my mother’s side. He lives in the U. S. Dalawa lang silang magkapatid ni Mommy habang si dad naman ay nag-iisang anak lang.

My uncle is married but he has no children. He rarely came here to the Philippines. He chose to live there and not here for some random confidential problems. Naaalala ko pa noon na kami pa ang dumalaw sa kanila sa ibang bansa para mabisita siya.

“Pasensya na at hindi ako nakauwi ng mga panahong kailangan mo ako.” maramdaming aniya.

Alam kong may iniiwasan si uncle rito sa Pilipinas kaya nahihirapan siyang umuwi.

Mommy used to tell me that someone had hurt them before. Their family was one of the rich but in an instant, all of that disappeared. They suffered, so uncle chose to go abroad. Uncle found out about the people who collided with our family and he knew we had no ability to fight them so he just chose to stay away and not to live here anymore.

Nakilala naman ni Mom si Dad kaya hindi na sumama si Mom kay uncle sa ibang bansa. Nagsumikap si Dad para maabot ang lahat ng mayroon kami ngayon. Pero gaya lang rin ng nangyari kila Mommy noon… In an instant, all we have disappeared.

Umiiyak ako sa kaniyang bisig habang mahigpit akong nakayakap sa kaniya. I understand uncle why he didn’t come home right away. He’s just scared of the memories of the past that he had encountered.

“I’m sorry, Blair. But I’m here. I’m here now.” pag-alo nito sa akin.

Sandaling katahimikan ang namayani sa amin. At ilang sandali pa ay nakalma ko na rin ang aking sarili.

Ngayon nalang ako muling naupo sa aming hapag kainan nang kumain ako kasama si Uncle ngayon. I can’t even stay longer here, but my uncle is here and we need to talked about what happened.

I told him everything and what I know. I said to him that the Ventura is the primary suspect for me. They killed my parents and I know that they planned it well.

“I watched the footage and I can’t stay in it for long. It’s my sister who they killed. We need justice for it.” my uncle seriously uttered.

He has now having his own investigation. He also found out that the Venturas were helping us. I also saw a wave of anger in his eyes when he found it out.

It seems that he hated the Ventura ever since. At nasabi ko rin sa kaniya ang tungkol sa mga ari arian naming nawala dahil sa mga utang na naiwan ni Dad.

“Do you make sure that the debt of your father was real? Sa pagkakaalam ko ay hindi gawain ’yon ng iyong ama. They may just say that. You know here in the business industry. Masyadong gahaman ang mga tao.” he said it in ferocious.

I can say that my uncle and my perspective are all the same. Pero ang ipinagtataka ko lang ay parang matagal na niyang kilala ang mga Ventura. I also told him about our company that I paid to senator Fuentes.

Napakunot naman ang noo niya sa sinabi ko.

“I don’t want them to get the mansion. At saka ang mga Ventura naman ang namamahala ron lalo na at kasosyo ni Dad si don Denver. Kaya mas pipiliin ko pang iba nalang ang mamahala no’n.”

“You think that senator will let the Ventura handle it? Dapat hindi ka muna nagpadalos dalos sa desisyon mo Blair.” may diing ani uncle sa akin at saka siya mahinang bumuntong hininga.

He’s got a point but I don’t have many options at that time.

“If I only go home earlier, this will not gonna happen.”

I gasped.

“Is that all the assets that your father has? Bakit mukhang kakaunti lang ang meron siya? As far as I know, he still has a lot of property.”

“I have already talked to our lawyer and he has already shown me all of Dad’s assets. That’s all dad left me.”

Nakakunot naman ang noo niya akong pinagmasadan na para bang nag-iisip ng malalim.

“Does he not have any assets left in your name?”

“Wala na po,”

Dalawang araw na si uncle rito sa Pilipinas at nasabi niyang isang linggo lang siyang mananatili rito. He answered all the expenses here in our house. The mansion is purely secured by his men.

Ginagawa ni uncle ang lahat para lang mahanap ang taong gumawa niyon sa mga magulang ko. He also thinks that the Ventura can be the culprit. Kaya pinamanmanan niya ito sa mga tauhan niya.

I was preparing myself for our catch-up. Pinagbigyan ko na sila Maica na pupunta ako ngayon sa cafe na madalas naming puntahan. Hindi ako makatanggi dahil sa pangungulit nito sa akin.

Naisip ko na rin na baka may alam silang bago tungkol sa mga Ventura ngayon lalong lalo na kay Johnson. His brother was close to Ace, paniguradong may nalalaman ito tungkol dito. Kaya napagdesisyunan ko na ring tumungo para mangalap ng impormasyon.

Nagpaalam na ako kay uncle nang paalis na ako ng mansion. Pero nahinto ako sa paglalakad paalis nang tinawag niya akong muli.

At pagkaharap ko ay nakita kong may kasama siyang isa sa mga tauhan niya.

The guy was tall, he has the menacing look as he gazed at me. His manly feature and body built was enough to say that he’s older than me. He’s in his mid-twenties I guess.

“Magdala ka ng isang bodyguard. I want you to be safe kung saan ka man pupunta. Mabuti na ang nag-iingat.” My uncle asserted to me.

Napatingin naman ako kay uncle ng maramdaman kong hinuhuli nito ang tingin ko.

“This is Denis, he will be your personal butler. He’s good and well trained from the agency where I got him. Sasamahan ka niya.”

I looked at Denis. He just only stared at me blankly.

“Okay, thanks, uncle.” Tanging ani ko.

Nakasunod sa aking naglalakad si Denis patungo sa sasakiyang inihanda ni uncle para sa akin. Siya ang nagmaneho at sinabi ko lang sa kaniya kung saan kami tutungo.

When I arrived at the cafe, I sat in the chair next to Maica.

“Hey Blair, I missed you.” malungkot na ani Maica.

I slightly smiled at her. I looked at them and noticed their changes.

“Kamusta ka na? Ayos ka lang ba sa bago mong school?” Clark asked me.

“May mga nang-bubully ba sayo ro’n?” Sean asked me worriedly.

Nakita ko namang napabaling ng tingin si Clark kay Sean.

I just gave them a sweet facade smile. “I’m alright. I like my new school. No one bullied me there.” sagot ko sa mga tanong nila sa akin.

Nakita ko namang nakatingin lang sa akin si Johnson.

Bahagya niya akong nginitian pero hindi iyon umabot sa kaniyang mga mata. I glared at him for a while before I looked away.

We ate the food they order next and talked about their stuff and new hobbies. It was like a usual conversation to them habang tahimik lang ako at madalang na magsalita.

Napabaling ako ng tingin sa kabilang gawi ko at napansin ko si Denis na mag-isang nakaupo sa kaniyang table hindi kalayuan sa aming pwesto. Nakatingin sa akin na animong binabantayan ako.

Well, that was his job anyway. Pero hindi ko maiwasang magtaka sa kaniyang mga tingin.

“Who’s that man?” Agad naman akong napatingin kay Johnson nang tanungin niya ako.

Tiningnan ko lang siya at hindi na sinagot pa. Nakita ko pang tinitingnan ni Johnson ang gawi ni Denis. Hindi ko naman na iyon pa binigyan ng pansin.

I got home after that day. And in the following days, I was planning to come with my uncle to the States. He offered me to come with him. The investigation will go on even I am there. Uncle assured me that he had prepared everything for me.

I also want to leave the country and continue the life I used to have with my family. The only difference now is that only my uncle can be with me.

I don’t think I’m gonna miss this place. Except with the memories of my parents here. I will never forget the pain I get, caused by the people who ruined my life.

I will not let them take all my possessions, especially the property that my father had left for me. I will take it all back when I return.

Just wait for my return and I’ll make you pay for all the damage you caused to my life.

Kabanata 30

Kabanata 30

Fear

Mabilis lumipas ang panahon at hindi ko pa rin nahahanap ang hustisya. At habang tumatagal ay nagiging bato na ang puso ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit naging ganito na ako ngayon.

All I want is to take my revenge to the people who ruined my life. Who ends my happy life with my family.

I study in the U.S. and get busy there. I seldom open my social media accounts unless I’ll contact Manang Soling about the investigation.

And when the years passed. Nalugi at naging mahina ang takbo ng kumpanya ni uncle.

Natigil ang pagmamanman namin sa mga Ventura dahil do’n. Napilitan na rin akong magtrabaho para makatulong kila uncle at auntie. Ayaw ko namang maging pabigat sa kanila kaya mas pinili ko nalang gawin iyon.

Minsan na akong naimbitahan ng isang agency para magmodelo. I grab their offer and take that as an opportunity because I need it that time. Isang Pilipinong bading din ang nakatulong sa aking makapasok doon dahil siya ang nagpasa ng mga kakailanganin ko.

I have no experience when it comes to this but I always do my best to make them satisfied in my every shoot and photos that they took.

Isa iyon sa pinagkaabalahan ko ng mga panahong nasa ibang bansa ako kasama ang aking tiyuhin. I once ramp a clothing brand. May mga endorsement din akong sinalihan pero hindi rin ako agad natanggap. They need professional models that can endorse their product perfectly. At wala akong credentials pagdating sa mga iyon.

Minsan na rin akong kinainggitan ng mga kapwa kong pinay na nagmomodelo rin. They said that I only use my charm and I flirt with the people who I will work with.

Hindi ko nalang binigyang pansin ang mga iyon. I’m doing this to earn money for myself and not because this is my passion and what I want. Madaling kumita sa larangang ito dahil pulos ganda at katawan lang ang kailangan.

But when I graduated, I stopped too. Pinili ko nalang bumalik ng Pilipinas at gawin ang mga plano ko.

“Blair, you’re doing great.” It was Johnson.

Nandito kami ngayon sa isang private room nila.

After years naging kasundo ko si Johnson. Maica, Sean, and Clark are still friends of mine, but I always keep my distance from them. Unlike Johnson, he taught me so many things that can benefit my plan.

They have an arms manufacturer or colt defense. They have also a place where he can train me for using their guns. Gaya lang din ng napuntahan namin ni Ace. But I chose to go to the other place. Sa isang branch niya nila ako dinala. And I enjoyed airsoft.

“Hmm, you train me very well. Thanks.” I smiled at him. I put down the gun and then walked towards him.

He’s now sipping on his glass of bourbon drink. He raised it to me.

“Nah, I’m going somewhere else. I need to drive.” pagtanggi ko nang alukin niya ako niyon.

“Okay, saan ka pupunta? I’ll drive you.” prisinta pa niya.

I raised my one brow and smirked at him. Nanliit naman ang mga mata niyang nakatingin sa akin.

“No need. I can do it. Uuwi lang ako ng mansion.”

Napamaang naman niya akong tiningnan. Tinalikuran ko na siya at saka ako umalis.

Johnson is so professional and strict when it comes to me. He can even read what I am thinking. Kaya alam niya rin na ilag na talaga ako sa kanila simula ng mangyari ang insidente.

He never questioned me on how I feel. He just helped me to control my anger towards the Ventura. Madalas ko siyang makasama lalo na nang makatapos kami ng kolehiyo.

Now I get why I feel something strange to him before when we are in high school. He seems so silent but he always greets Ace when he sees it.

That made me think that this person could help me. His family are closed to the Ventura after all. Napatunayan ko na ’yon nang isama ako ni Ace sa airsoft nila. It was Johnson’s brother.

Mukha silang magkasundong dalawa kaya siguro magkakilala na ring talaga si Johnson at Ace noong mga panahong iyon, pero hindi sila gano’n kalapit sa isa’t isa.

“Yeah, nice man! I know you can do it. Trust me. By the way, how’s uncle Denver? Is he now alright?” I looked at Bench’s way nang makalabas ako ng silid.

He’s now sitting on the couch. He turned his way to me when he noticed my presence.

Agad naman akong nag-iwas ng tingin.

“Okay, bye Ace.”

Palabas na ako ng pintuan nang marinig kong patayin niya ang tawag.

He’s still friends with Ace. Isa rin iyon sa dahilan kaya hindi ko masyadong kinakausap si Bench. Because the last time we talked, he asked me things about Ace. And I didn’t like it.

“Blair, Ace is going on our green zone airsoft game site. He has reservations there. Ang tagal na ng huling punta niya. Kasama ka ba niyang pupunta ulit don?” inosenteng tanong sa akin ni Bench isang hapon.

Kasama ko si Johnson at ito ang unang araw na tuturuan niya ako. Naabutan namin si Bench na nandon kaya niya ako nakausap.

“No, maybe he’s with the other girls.” I simply said to him.

Bahagya pa siyang napaisip sa sinabi ko.

I’m in my grade twelve at that time. Bago pa man ako nagpasiyang sumama kay uncle patungong ibang bansa. Hindi ko alam na hindi pa pala niya sinasabi sa kaibigan niyang hiwalay na kami.

Well, I did not pay attention to it though.

I went to college and changed the course I took. When I was in senior high I wanted architecture because I wanted to emulate Dad. But that has changed and I just chose to get business management. It was also for the sake of our company that Dad left for me. At babawiin ko pa ’yon sa mga Fuentes.

It was hard at first but I still managed. Ginawa kong motibasyon ang isiping nasa kanila pa rin ang kumpanya at kailangan na handa ako sa panahong itetake-over ko na iyon.

They gave me the right amount of money that our company earns. I once attended a meeting there and they explained to me the possibilities and a few changes that would happen to the company. Of course, the family Ventura was there. And I can also feel Ace staring at me during those times.

I graduated college with a dean’s list. It wasn’t an achievement for me. That was just the first step so I could carry out my plans. Kaya nang makauwi na nga ako ng Pilipinas ay hindi ko inaasahang may pagsubok na namang darating sa akin.

Uncle was sick. Nagka ischemic stroke si uncle. Wala na rin kaming mapagkukuhanan ng pambili ng gamot ng mga panahong iyon kaya nagpasiya nalang kaming iuwi siya ng Pilipinas at dito na ituloy ang pag gagamot niya.

It may be good if he takes the therapy in the U.S. but we are short in currency.

“Hija, ang laki mo na at mas lalong umangat ang iyong tunay na ganda. Nakuha mo ang mukha ng iyong ina. Kamusta ka naman?” tanong sa akin ni Manang isang araw nang makauwi na kami galing ibang bansa.

“Salamat po. Maayos naman po ako, kayo po kamusta naman po rito?”

“Mabuti rin naman ako rito. Minsang binisita na rin ako ng pamilya Ventura rito. Binigyan nila ako ng kaunting tulong.”

Saglit naman akong natigilan sa sinabi ni Manang. They are showing their kindness even behind their good image is their demonic behavior.

“Hija, alam kong hindi mo pa rin sila napapatawad dahil sa nangyari. Pero hindi mo sila dapat sinisisi. Gusto kong malaman mo na wala silang kinalaman sa pagkamatay ng iyong mga magulang. At ang tunay na salarin ay hindi pa rin nahahanap.” Ani Manang sa akin.

Matunog akong napabuntong-hininga. Ang sakit sa dibdib na magpasa-hanggang ngayon ay wala pa ring nangyayari sa imbestigasyon. Hindi man lang umuusad ang kaso. Hindi pa rin nahahanap ang taong may kagagawan ng lahat ng ito.

At maging ako ay walang magawa dahil sa kakulangan sa buhay.

I never felt this weak before. We always have everything because Dad can provide it for me. Pero ngayon ay wala na, mansion nalang ang natatanging ari-arian na meron ako ngayon.

I applied to different companies here in Manila. Kung papasok naman akong muli sa pagmomodelo rito sa Pilipinas ay hindi ko masasabing magandang ideya iyon.

Here in the Philippines, the people are so toxic. They might know my background and will declined me. I don’t want them to talk about my past and made me an issue in time.

Masyadong publiko ang trabahong iyon. Lalo na at makakalat pa ang ilang mga pictures ko. Gano’n rin naman sa ibang bansa pero wala naman akong ikinababahala dahil wala namang nakakakilala sa akin do’n.

I tried very hard to apply and they suddenly hired me. Maybe I make them impressed by my credentials and all that I’d submitted. But I chose to work for a company that immediately gave me a high position.

Si auntie ay naiwan sa ibang bansa para na rin magtrabaho. Kami lang ni uncle at Manang Soling ang nasa mansion. Ang dating maraming tauhan ni uncle ay isa nalang ang natitira.

Si Denis ang matyagang nagbabantay sa amin. I do not know why he still chose to accompany us even though we could no longer pay him.

Simula nang mangibang bansa kami ay kasa kasama na rin namin siya ron. Minsan siyang umuwi ng Pilipinas habang kami ay naroon pa.

He didn’t come back that time pero nang makauwi kaming muli rito sa Pilipinas ay bumalik siyang ulit sa amin. And Uncle was so grateful that he came back. Because until now we are still not comfortable with no guards around us.

I was walking towards the elevator of the lobby when I saw the woman who once ruined me. I am wearing a yellow slim split raffle high waist pencil skirt and a white smocked off-shoulder blouse paired with white strap heels.

Pumasok na ako ng elevator nang bumukas ito. Papunta ako ngayon sa top floor para puntahan ang owner ng company na ito. At hindi ko inaasahan ang biglang pagpasok ni Lisa kasama si Ace sa elevator.

They looked surprised when they saw me inside. I didn’t look at their way. Pumasok na rin naman sila.

I acted like I didn’t notice their presence. Naramdaman ko ang tingin sa akin ni Lisa habang si Ace ay hindi naman ako binabalingan ng tingin.

So they are still together. And my decision was right that I broke up with him before. Hinihintay lang naman talaga nilang malaman ko ang totoo para magkasama na silang muli at ginamit lang talaga ako ni Ace.

I feel bitter as I thought of it. But I’ll never be happy until I see Ace suffer. I need to get revenge for everything they did to my parents. To my family and to me.

Hindi pa rin nawawala at hindi na mawawala itong galit ko sa kanila. I swear to god that I will not be satisfied until I cannot take my revenge on them.

Naramdaman ko naman ang mabigat na presensya na naidulot ko sa kanila. I didn’t look at Ace’s way. And I don’t even want to see that bastard.

Maraming taon na ang nakalipas simula nang hindi ko siya nakita at ngayon ay makikita ko siya na kasama si Lisa. Hindi ito ang gusto at inaasahan kong una namin muling pagkikita. I want to surprise them by my presence but then it happened.

Well, it’s really nice to see them both. They are both evils, kaya bagay na bagay silang dalawa para sa isa’t isa.

Bumukas ang elevator at hindi sila lumabas. Bahagya namang napakunot ang noo ko. Kung siniswerte ka nga naman. Mukhang parehas pa ng floor ang pupuntahan namin.

Sumarang muli ang elevator at paakyat na kami ngayon ng top floor. And what are they really doing here? This is not their company, they are not supposed to be here.

“Ace, how’s the meeting kanina? Ayos naman ba?” malanding tanong ni Lisa kay Ace.

I groaned a bit. The perverts are flirting in public, I am so disgusted.

“It went well,” I heard his cold deep voice.

I slightly jumped when I heard him uttered. My heart thumped but I tried to calm myself.

But I smirked then get my phone when I felt it rang. Nakita kong si Johnson ang tumatawag.

“Hey, Blair. Where are you? Kukunin mo pa ba itong mga fake bombs dito sa amin o dadalhin ko nalang sa’yo?”

I cleared my throat before I speak.

“Can you deliver it instead? I’m still here in the office. Baka gabihin ako ng uwi.”

I heard him chuckled.

“Okay, okay what is this for anyway?”

Mas lumawak pa ang ngisi ko nang maisip kung para saan nga ba ito.

“Nothing, just send it right away.”

“Hmm, fine. I know what you’re thinking. But please be careful. Baka mahuli ka nila dahil diyan sa binabalak mo. At mapahamak ka pa.”

The elevator opened. Hindi ako lumabas. Hinintay ko munang mauna sila.

“Yeah, I know what I’m doing.”

“Let’s go, Lisa. Baka mahuli na tayo.”

“Okay, bye.” paalam ni Johnson sa kabilang linya.

Natutop naman ang tingin ko sa paraan ng paghawak ni Ace sa mga braso ni Lisa. I just leered before I went out next to them.

Lumapit muna ako sa receptionist nang makalabas ako. She called Mr. Alvaro and inform him about my appointment.

“Pasok na raw po kayo, Miss.”

Tinungo ko naman na ang office na itinuro nila sa akin. I open the door at diretsong pumasok sa loob.

I was confidently walking inside when I saw the man standing in front of Mr. Alvaro.

Agad naman akong nakaramdam ng inis nang makita kong si Ace iyon at si Lisa. 

Bakit ba kasi sila nandito? I really hate their presence.

“Miss Cortez, sorry for making you wait.” Mr. Alvaro suddenly spoke when I got near them.

Taas noo naman akong lumapit sa kanila. Nakita ko pa ang mapanglait na tingin ni Lisa sa akin.

Walang gana ko naman siyang tinapunan ng tingin. Nothing changed in her. She’s still that pathetic girlfriend of Ace. Who hysterically approached me at the school parking lot.

I rolled my eyes at her then smiled sweetly at Mr. Alvaro. He’s gonna be my boss. They are the supplier and the producer of some lively hood types of furniture in a different part of Asia. At masasabi kong kalebel nila ang mga Ventura. Kaya dito rin ang napili kong pasukan.

“Please take your seat, Ms. Cortez.”

Marahan naman akong naupo sa sofa na naka handa para sa mga bisita.

Prenteng nakaupo si Ace malapit sa akin. I saw him in my peripheral vision that he’s looking at me. I just ignore his stares.

“This is Ms. Cortez that I will assign to you Mr. Ventura for the furniture that you wanted to be shipped. She’s our new employee and I know that she’s the best. Wala ka ng poproblemahin pa sa kaniya.” Mr. Alvaro said.

Bahagya naman akong nasamid sa sarili kong laway nang marinig ko iyon. I didn’t know that he’ll gonna be my first client. I gritted my teeth as I looked at the table. Hindi ko inaasahan na ito ang magiging parte ko rito sa kumpanya umpisa pa lang.

“Is that so? Wala na ba kayong empleyado na sa tingin niyo ay mas magaling kesa sa kaniya? ’Yun bang matagal na rito sa inyo Mr. Alvaro.” Ace asked him.

Hindi ko na napigilang mapatingin sa gawi nila. My lips parted to what he just said.

Maarteng nakataas ang kilay ni Lisa sa akin habang nakapandekwatro pang upo si Ace nang balingan ko silang dalawa sa aking harapan.

Nanliliit ng mga matang tumingin ako sa kaniya. Even in this matter, he will take away the opportunity from me. They are still not satisfied that we have lost everything, and this is what he wants to take from me now? This is the only job I have and I think he’ll do everything to ruin me.

“Well, I can say that she’s the best. Pero kung gusto mo ay ’yung matagal na ritong nagtatrabaho ay wala naman iyong kaso sa akin, Mr. Ventura. Bakit nga pala ayaw mo kay Ms. Cortez? Because she’s actually my highly recommended to you.” Mr. Alvaro retorted.

“Mas gusto ko’ yung maraming nalalaman, especially that I have a lot of questions about the quality of the pieces of furniture that you are selling. It’s for the launching of our newest hotel and I want it to secure and make sure.”

This brute is really getting into my nerves!

Does he think that my knowledge is still not enough to satisfy him with my answers? What does he want? Ask me anything and I’ll throw to his thick face my fucking answers.

“Yeah, I’ll agree to him.” sabad naman ni Lisa sa tabi nito.

Nahuli ko naman ang tingin sa akin ni Mr. Alvaro. Nag-aalangan niya kong binalingan ng tingin kaya inunahan ko na siyang magsalita.

“Well, it’s fine with me Mr. Alvaro. And in fact, I am the manager of the other department and it’s not my job to answer his questions. It’s out of my lane if I will give him a tour inside the furniture.” ani ko kay Mr. Alvaro at saka taas noong bumaling ng tingin kay Ace. I looked straight at his grey eyes.

“And without further ado, I can give you the portfolio of our furniture in no time. Also, I have my team set a presentation for you that can answer and prove your questions. Without any speculation, we want to give you the best service that we can. We want our customers to trust our company and we won’t give you the benefit to doubt us.” Then I lift my eyes to Mr. Alvaro.

“I told you, she’s the best,”

Nakita ko naman kung paano lalong nairita ang mukha ni Lisa sa akin. Ace was silent as he seriously staring at me. Nakita ko pang bumaba ang tingin nito sa katawan ko.

“So? You still need another one?” Tanong pang muli ni Mr. Alvaro sa kaniya.

He licked his lower lip, like what he usually did.

“Yeah, just set our next meeting.” tumayo na si Ace kasabay ni Lisa.

Does he still choose to find another one?! Well, I shouldn’t be care about it anyway. At least I proved to him a while ago that I’m really the best. I smirked at that thought.

Lumabas na ako at tinungo na ang opisinang nakahanda para sa akin. I finished my work first. Marami akong inasikaso nang araw na iyon at hindi ko na rin nakita sila Ace.

Nang matapos ko ang lahat ng dapat kong gawin ay naupo akong muli sa aking upuan. I opened my laptop and searched their company. Nakita ko kung paano itong lumago sa nakalipas na mga taon. It became more bigger and their Estates were established in a different part of the Asia.

And their new launching project caught my attention. Oriental Ventura Hotel… This was the OVH I have remembered that I’d read the article before.

Nakaramdam ako ng matinding kirot sa aking puso nang maalala ang article na ito sa isang site. Ito pala iyong malaking proyektong inihanda at pinagplanuhan nila Dad at ng mga Ventura ng mga panahong iyon. Nahinto lang ng magkaroon ng aberya at si Dad ang sinisisi nilang naging dahilan niyon.

I felt sad as I remember the past. The pain was still there. It is still living in my heart.

Every time I remember about what happened. The moment I saw their bodies lie on the floor. The time I held their arm and hugged them tightly. Their blood was scattered on the floor. And the moment I felt that they’re not breathing anymore.

It hurts my heart so much. It was as if everything I had suddenly disappeared. My heart sank with the pain and sorrow I was feeling. I had no strength during those times. I was just a weak and shy person.

Napapikit ako ng mariin nang maalala ang lahat ng iyon. Hindi ko hahayaang hindi ko maipaghiganti ang mga magulang ko. I know that they are just framed up by the Ventura.

Dad did nothing but do good to the Ventura but they still couldn’t trust him. Hindi sana mangyayari ang lahat iyon kung nagtiwala lang sila at hindi naniwala sa mga sabi sabi ng iba. Pinaimbestigihan nila ang tungkol sa pagkawala ng pera pero si Dad pa rin ang pinapalabas na magnanakaw.

I heard my phone rang at the side of my laptop. Nakita kong si Denis iyon kaya dinampot ko na at sinagot.

“Hello, Ma’am Blair,”

Napaayos naman ako ng upo.

I need to move now. Lalo na at nakita ko ang nalalapit nang launching ng new branch nila para sa OVH. Hindi ko pwedeng palampasin lang ito.

“Have you prepared everything?” I asked seriously.

Napatuwid pa ako ng upo habang hinihintay ang sagot niya.

“Yes, only one thing is missing.”

“Just wait for me there, dadalhin ko riyan.” then I hung up the call.

I stood up and fixed my things. I’m out for today. It’s now six in the evening and I need to do my first plan. Nakasakay na ako ng elevator nang mabasa ko ang mensahe sa akin ni Johnson.

Johnson:

I’m in the basement.

Lumabas naman na ako ng elevator at my iilan pang bumati sa akin paalis. Tinungo ko ang basement at nakita ko nga si Johnson na prenteng nakasandal sa kaniyang sasakyan.

This man is really cool. He noticed me so he looked up on my way. The side of his lips tugged up, forming into a smirk.

Nginisian ko rin siya. I did not expect Johnson and I to be this close to each other after what happened. He understands me, at ’yon ang nagustuhan ko sa kaniya.

“The delivery is here. Want to check it inside?” ngingisi ngising tanong nito sa akin.

I smacked his arm when I got neared him. He just chuckled sexily.

“Halika na, at may kailangan pa akong gawin.” Lumakad ako patungo sa pinto ng kaniyang sasakyan at pumasok.

“Hmm. Let me guess your plan.” biglang anito nang makaupo na siya sa loob at nag-umpisa ng magmaneho.

“No need to guess, I just only want to scare them by those faked bombs.”

Natawa naman siya sa sinabi ko. Naiinis ko siyang tiningnan. Huminto naman siya sa pagtawa nang mapansin niya ang seryoso kong tingin.

“Well, just make sure na hindi ka nila mahuhuli. Wala akong pampiyansa sa’yo.” hinampas ko ng talaga ang kniyang braso sa sobrang pagkairita. Humagalpak naman siya ng tawa.

“You know what? Kung hindi mo lang talaga ako tinutulungan matagal na kitang iniwasan.” Ani ko sa kaniya.

“Okay, okay. Alam ko naman ‘yon. Pero kailangan mo rin naman ako hindi ba? Wala ng ibang makakatulong sa’ yo laban sa mga Ventura.”

“If only I can, I wouldn’t dare to let you help me.” I leered on him before I shook my head.

Hinatid niya muna ako sa mansion.

“Wait for me here,”

I went inside our house. Nakasalubong ko pa si Manang na naghahanda na para sa hapunan.

“Manang, may aasikasuhin lang po ako sa opisina. Hindi po muna ako makakasabay sa inyo ngayong mag-gabihan.” I said to her as I went inside.

“Eh kung gano’n, kumain ka na ba? Hindi magandang malipasan ka ng gutom hija.”

I smiled at her. Maalalahanin talaga si Manang kaya hindi ko maiwasang matuwa tuwing sinasabi niya iyon. Siya na rin ang tumayo kong pangalawang ina kaya malaki ang utang na loob ko sa kaniya.

I went out of my room at saka umalis na ng bahay kalaunan. Hindi naman na ako nagpaalam pa kay uncle dahil alam kong uusisain lamang ako niyon kapag nagpaalam ako sa kaniya.

I hurriedly open the door of his car in the front seat.

“Excited?” Johnson asked me mockingly.

“No,” I just simply answered to him.

I’m not excited nor happy about what will I’m gonna do. I just only want them to know what it feels like to be scared. Kung anong pakiramdam ng matakot ka ng wala ka ng kalaban laban.

Like what they did with my parents. I did nothing for them. Because I was weak and we’re being sabotaged.

I want to scare them. And make them realize how does it feel to be afraid of the things they can no longer control. I’m just getting started. And if I can not find justice in the death of my parents, I will look for them and dismiss them.

They started burning the embers inside me. And now I will start to make a fire. And let the flares of fire consume my fear.

Pinaandar na ni Johnson ang kaniyang sasakyan patungo sa lugar kung saan namin gagawin ang aking unang hakbang.

Let see where your fear will take you… Ventura.

Kabanata 31

Kabanata 31

Revenge

“Denis, naka set na ba ang lahat?” I asked him over the phone.

Johnson was beside me as I looked at the Ventura building. Nasa loob pa kami ng sasakyan niya at dito lang namin papanoorin ang lahat ng mangyayari. His car was parked just near outside the hotel on the other side of the street.

“Yes, everything are all set,” Denis muttered.

I dropped the phone. Hihintayin ko nalang ang pagdating ng mga Ventura.

Tonight, they will gonna have dinner with their associates. I got this info from Johnson and he said that the investors and stockholders are gonna be here.

It will be their best night with the Ventura Estates. Let’s see if they’re still gonna invest if they will find out that the security of their building is not enough to protect the people who live there.

Napatingin ako kay Denis nang matanawan ko siyang lumabas na ng building. This is our call sign if the Ventura’s and their guests are all starting.

“Hmm, let’s now play this game.”

“Hindi pa nila napapansin iyon sa mga panahong ito,” ani Johnson sa tabi ko.

“Okay, let’s just wish that my plan will work.” Then I turn my gaze at the glass wall of their restaurant.

Madaling makita ang loob nito dahil don.

Masaya silang lahat habang nag-uumpisa na sa pagkain. It was just on the first floor. I even saw Ace wearing his business attire. He is still with Lisa. Katabi niya ito sa upuan. Si madame Helena naman at don Denver ay preskong nakikipag-usap sa mga kasamahan nila.

I greeted my teeth while I looked at them. They don’t deserve my father’s kindness. Naalala ko pa kung paanong purihin ni don Denver ang aking ama nang nag-uumpisa pa lang ito sa kanila.

He was so impressed by my Dad’s work and he sees the potential in it. Tapos ngayon ay nakayanan nilang gawin iyon sa mga magulang ko.

It’s now living in the past but the present might collapse if the problems in the past are still unresolved. They are the cause and their effect was lethal in my life.

Kaya hindi ako papayag na buhay ko lang ang masisira.

I smirked when I clicked the red button in my hand. It’s the remote of my faked bombs and it’s now starting to count. The timer was set and the ticking was loud.

“Woah, Blair. You know I’ll support you in this but this can be the cause of their heart attacks!” Johnson suddenly spoke.

“If this will gonna be the reason, then be it. Kulang pa ’to sa kabayarang ginawa nila sa mga magulang ko.”

At ilang sandali pa ang lumipas ay nakita kong may babaeng nagmamadaling lumabas at nilapitan ang guard na nasa labas. Nakita ko namang napatingin sila sa kabilang dako ng resto. Maybe at the counter where the receptionist is. Paniguradong nagmamadali na silang magtawag ng saklolo ngayon.

Nakita ko rin kung panong biglaang napatayo sa kanilang mga upuan ang mga taong nakapansin sa paglabas masok ng mga receptionist ng hotel.

May lumapit pang isang bodyguard sa Don at saka may ibinulong rito. Of course, their employees should not overreact about it. Baka magkagulo at magpanic ang lahat ng tao kapag nagpanic din ang mga empleyado.

Sa mga ganitong klase ng sitwasyon, nagagawa pa ring mag relax ni don Denver pero hindi niya maitatago ang pangamba at takot na kaniyang nadarama. Nakita ko rin kung paano napahawak sa kaniyang dibdib ang Senyora nang makita kong bulungan ito ng isa sa mga tauhan nila.

Ace hurriedly attended to her mother. Nag-umpisa naman ng magmadaling lumabas ang mga tao sa resto maging sa lobby ay nagpapanic ang mga ito nang may isa sa loob ng resto ang mukhang nagpanic at napasigaw na sa takot.

And in no time, I saw the police arrived and their people that will be going to take a look at the restaurant of their hotel.

Nakita ko ring may umalalay kay Lisa habang palabas sila ng building. Napakunot naman ang noo ko nang makita ko ang lalaking umaalalay sa kaniya. It was the old man who negotiated with me about the payment of my father’s debt. At wala akong ibang pamimilian kung hindi ang kumpaniya namin ang ipangbayad sa kaniya.

“Senator Fuentes?” Hindi makapaniwalang nakamasid ako sa kanila ngayon.

I didn’t know that he’s one of Mr. Ventura’s colleagues. Akala ko ay wala na itong naging koneksiyon sa mga Ventura simula ng mawala ang aking ama. He’s a senator so what is he doing here with the businessman? Unless he’s negotiating with them. Sa pagkakaalam ko ay pinamamahalaan na niya ng iniwang kumpaniya ni Daddy dahil iyon ay naipangalan na sa kaniya ng mga Ventura.

“Yeah, you know him?” Johnson asked beside me.

I looked at his way.

“Bakit niya inaalalayan si Lisa?” kuryosong tanong ko.

Bahagya namang natigilan si Johnson sa kaniyang upuan habang diretsong nakatingin ang kaniyang mga mata sa nangyayari. He turned his gaze to my way.

“You don’t know him?” his forehead creased.

“Kilala ko siya pero bakit gano’n nalang ang pag-aalala niya kay Lisa?”

I know that I shouldn’t be care about Lisa. She is out of my plan but then I noticed senator Fuentes.

“That is senator Fuentes, father of Lisa Fuentes. I was surprised na hindi mo pa pala kilala ang ama ni Lisa.”

Napakunot naman ang noo ko sa sinabi niya.

Senator Fuentes is Lisa’s father? Hindi ko ito alam noon. Kaya pala ngayon ay kasa kasama ni Ace itong si Lisa dahil magkaibigan ang kanilang mga magulang.

Hindi na rin ako magtataka kung ipagkakasudo sila para sa isa’t isa. They are both rich and senator Fuentes seems a good public servant. Madalas mabalita ang mga proyekto nitong inilulunsad para sa mga taong walang bahay na matitirahan. Maraming tao ang sumusuporta sa organization at platapormang kaniyang ipinangako sa mga mamamayan.

Huli na ng mapansin kong halos lahat ng tao ay nasa labas na ng hotel ngayon. Ang iba naman ay umalis na. Hindi ko na nakita ang mga magulang ni Ace. Maybe they are scared of what happened kaya ipinauwi na ito.

And when my eyes caught Ace’s way, he’s busy talking to the police about the bomb they found inside the resto. Lisa is still there with her father.

Nakita ko pang napalingon lingon si Mr. Fuentes sa paligid. Animong may hinahanap o hinihintay na dumating. I saw Lisa approach Ace and join in their conversation. She even managed to clutch her hand on Ace’s arm.

“Let’s go, baka lapitan tayo rito ng mga pulis para mag inspection. We need to go, para hindi tayo pagdudahan.” narinig kong sabi ni Johnson sa tabi ko pero ang tingin ko ay nasa braso pa rin nila Lisa.

Mariin kong ipinikit ang aking mga mata at saka marahang malalim na huminga. All I can feel for him was only full anger. I only liked him before and I won’t let myself to fall for him again.

I went home that night and I was surprised when Denis welcomed me from the door.

“We succeeded in our first plan, I know you did your part and I can’t pay you for now. Baka sa susunod ko na iabot ang paunang bayad ko sa’yo.” mahinang ani ko sa kaniya.

“Ayos lang, makakapaghintay naman ako. At handa na rin ako para sa susunod nating hakbang.” aniya.

Napangiti naman ako nang marinig ang kaniyang sinabi.

Well, I have a long list of plans in taking my revenge. And I can’t wait to do it all my life until I satisfied myself.

“Good. You better get ready.” ’yon lang at iniwan ko na siya.

Umakyat na ako ng hagdan. Madilim na ang mansion marahil tulog na sila Manang. I opened the door of my room and turned on the lights. I went to my bathroom to clean and change my clothes. Naupo muna ako sa aking kama habang nakapatong sa lap ko ang aking laptop.

For sure the media were definitely talking about what happened on the Ventura Estates. May nakita pa akong isang kaka-update lang na video ng isang news reporter na halatang bagong kuha lang.

I saw Ace standing while being crowded by the reporters. His bodyguards are protecting him while he’s talking to the police. And Lisa was still there beside him.

The reporters are asking so many things pero ni isa ay walang pinaunlakan na sagot. May nakita pa akong isang news report. I click the video and there, Ace faces the mic while the reporter was asking him.

“Is it true that a bomb was found inside the Ventura Estates?” the reporter asked him.

The flash of their cameras is all focused on his way. They are all waiting for his answers.

“Yes, but it wasn’t real. It’s just fake.” seryosong sagot nito habang ang mga mata ay madilim ang mga tingin.

I can also see how his jaw moved after he said that. I admit that he’s really immaculately handsome over the camera. At mas lalo pa sa personal.

“How did that happen? Is there anyone threatening your life? Or because you are about to open your first branch here in the Philippines of OV Hotel kaya may ganitong nangyayari? This will have a big impact on the peole who will accommodate your hotels.”

“As of now, we are doing our own investigation about this. At wala pang ibang naiisip na dahilan kung bakit at kung sino ang gumawa nito.”

“Do you consider this as a threat to your company in the business world or a threat to your family’s life?”

Saglit pang umigting ang panga niya bago niya tuluyang sinagot ang tanong ng reporter na iyon.

“We are still speculating and investigating about this all. And all I can say for now is that this is life-threatening. Not just in the industry but to all lives that we are securing under our estates.” ’yon lang ang sinabi ni Ace at akmang aalis na ito nang magtanong pang muli ang isang reporter.

“Sir! Sir! Is it possible that this happened because you will open a new branch of OV Hotel that is related to the death of architect Cortez? Hindi po ba ay ito rin ang tinitingnan niyong dahilan ng pagkabaril niya noon?” tanong ng isang babaeng reporter.

I gulped hard when I feel my heartbeat tightened. It was about the death of my parents that the reporter is asking on him. I watched Ace while he paused for a moment and didn’t move in his place.

Hindi na ako nagulat pa na mahahalungkat ito ng media lalo na at ito ang proyektong binuo ng mga Ventura kasama ang Dad ko noon.

“Sa nakalipas ng anim na taon ay hindi pa rin nahahanap ang suspect sa pagkamatay ng mag-asawang Cortez, magpasa-hanggang ngayon. May kinalaman po ba kayo sa nangyaring trahedya noon-” hindi na natapos ng isa pang reporter ang pagtatanong ng harangan ito ng mga bodyguard.

The video was also ended.

This will have a big negative impact on the upcoming launch of their new branch of OV Hotel. And the main purpose of this all was accomplished.

Hanggang ngayon maging ang lahat ay alam pa rin ang nangyari tungkol sa nakaraan. I do believe that this was all their fault. That is why Ace couldn’t move from where he was when the reporter asked him earlier, because he knew that their family was involved with it.

I caught him standing there that time. I might not see him exactly pulling the trigger towards my parents even the CCTV footage proves that he really didn’t. The man who runs after the incident is the culprit and they were helping him.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit magpasahanggang ngayon ay wala pa ring bakas ng lalaking pumatay sa aking mga magulang. Kaya alam kong sa mga puntong ito ay sinusustentuhan iyon ng mga Ventura para lang hindi mailabas ang tunay na baho nila.

I read some articles in different sites. At nakitang halos lahat don ay laman ng headlines ang tungkol sa nangyari kanina. Unang plano ko pa lang ang naisakatuparan ko at ganito na kaagad kaugong ang balita. Paano pa kaya ang mga susunod kong hakbang. Baka mabaliw na ang mga Ventura sa kakaisip tungkol dito.

I closed my laptop and put it on the side table. The next days passed. Pinalipas ko muna ang mga nangyari at pinahupa ang issue tungkol sa Ventura Estates.

Kailangan ko munang alisin sa isipan ng mga tao iyon bago gawin ang susunod kong hakbang. Because I know after the faked bomb happened, the Ventura is fully secured. Hindi ka basta bastang makakapasok sa alinmang establisyemento nila ng walang humaharang sa’yo. Kaya kailangan ko muna itong palipasin bago gawin ang susunod kong hakbang.

“Kamusta naman sa trabaho mo Blair? Is your workplace is good?” tanong sa akin ni uncle nang sabay kaming nagbreakfast isang umaga.

“The company was good and all their facilities and offices are well, nice. Maganda rin po ang ibinigay sa aking pwesto kaya hindi ganoon kahirap ang trabaho ko.”

“That’s good to hear,” nahihirapan mang tanong ni uncle ay pinilit pa rin niyang magsalita. His left part of the body was paralyzed kaya nahihirapan siya sa pagsasalita at paggalaw.

The doctor said that it may or may not resolved, even with therapy. Some of the stroke symptoms may never resolve or get better. TIA symptoms last for a short time. But in my uncle’s case, we’re having a hard time with his treatment. Dahil na rin sa hindi sapat ang kaniyang mga gamot na iniinom at wala pang therapy treatment session.

Kaya ng makalipas ang dalawang buwan at naka sweldo na ako ay nagbalak na kaming mag undergo si uncle ng therapy. Her wife also called us and she said that she also has the enough amount for it.

Magastos man iyon ay alam kong malaki ang maitutulong niyon sa paggaling ni uncle. Hinatid namin siya ni Denis sa airport dahil babalik na siya ng U.S. at do’n mag-a-undergo ng therapy.

I hugged my uncle tightly as he said his farewell to me.

“Mag-iingat ka Blair. Pasensya na at wala na akong nagawa at naitulong para sa imbestigasyon.” nahihirapang sinabi ni uncle. Hindi masiyadong malinaw ang kaniyang pagsasalita pero naiintindihan ko naman.

Naluluha ko naman siyang tiningnan. I grabbed his arm and then I spoke.

“It’s okay, uncle. Ang importante po ay magpagaling po muna kayo. Huwag niyo na pong alalahanin ang mga expenses, ako na pong bahala para ron.”

“I’m sorry for being a burden to you-”

“No uncle, you’re not. You are the only family I have. Kaya tutulungan ko kayo. Like what you did for me before nang mawala sila Dad at Mom.”

I smiled at him and kissed his cheeks.

“Salamat Blair, ah. Ako nang bahala sa Uncle mo. Mag-iingat ka rin dito.” my auntie said that also take a trip going back here in the country just to take my uncle back to the U.S.

I looked at her then kissed her cheeks as well. Naging malapit ang loob ko sa kanilang dalawa nang nanirahan ako sa ibang bansa. I love them both like how I love my Mom and Dad.

I’ll do everything for them. So I will do everything just to get revenge on the Ventura’s for what they did to us. I will make a way to get back the company that my Dad left for me. Even if it is impossible for that to happen, I will try to do my best to take it back from Senator Fuentes’s hold.

That senator Fuentes and don Denver are partners so I know Ace can do something for the company I want to get back. And that is gonna be my next plan. I need to polish my plan perfectly to make it work.

“Ms. Cortez, pinapatawag po kayo ni Mr. Alvaro.” anang secretary niya.

I looked at my phone to check the time. It’s afternoon and I’m about to finish what I’m doing.

“Okay,” umalis naman na ito.

Bumukas ang elevator at may mga taong sakay din nito.

I went in. “Totoo ba yung usap usapan na engage na raw si Mr. Ace Ventura sa anak ni senator Fuentes?” narinig kong bulungan ng mga babaeng nasa likuran ko.

Napatingin naman ako sa kanila sa salamin.

“Oo ata, hindi pa naman nako-confirm at wala pang balita.” the other girl said.

“Eh kung gano’n bakit kalat na kalat na ang ganoong issue?” tanong ng isa pang babaeng nakisali sa usapan nila.

“Baka para pagtakpan lang ang nangyari nung nakaraang buwan sa Ventura Estates. Alam mo namang magbubukas sila ng bagong branch nila rito sa Pinas at nangyari pa iyon.”

“Pero mukha namang matagal ng may something sa dalawang iyon kaya hindi rin imposible.”

The elevator opened and they exited. I couldn’t help but rolled my eyes at what they were saying. So that is their tactic to divert the attention of the media.

And they are using the word ‘engagement’ to that. It will gonna be a big topic for the media if they heard about it. Pero bakit wala pa akong nakikitang gano’ng balita?

For sure Lisa was really fond of that issue they make to cover up what just happened last time at their hotel. They should be together, but I won’t let them. Hindi ko pa nagagawa ang pangalawang plano ko para magdiwang silang dalawa.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Alvaro.” bati ko sa kaniya na g makapasok ako ng opisina niya.

Isinenyas niya ang upuang nasa harapan ng kaniyang lamesa.

“Have a seat. I have a favor to you,”

Nagugulat naman akong napatingin sa kaniya.

Mr. Alvaro is older than me. Kung titingnan mo siya ay mapapansin mong kaedad niya si Ace. His body built was also big. From the broad shoulders down to his biceps and sexy body. But he’s fairer than Ace. And their heights are the same. They are both tall as well.

“What is it, sir?”

“About Mr. Ventura’s request. Nag take ng leave ngayon ang taong humahawak ng orders nila. And the only thing you need to do is to deliver them the notarized copy of the contract.”

Saglit naman akong natigilan.

“Sir, I will send it soon. I will just call the person who will deliver it to them-”

“No, I want you to personally send it to them. Don’t worry I will give you an incentive.”

Napamaang naman ako sa offer ni sir. Well, this is fine with me though. I also need to take a look inside their territory. And also it’s the money that makes me say yes on this.

I need to take action for the second plan and this contract can help me with it.

“Yes, sir. I will do it myself.”

He just smiled at me before I turned my back to him. Palabas na ako ng opisina kinaumagahan daladala ang kontratang kailangan kong ibigay at papirmahan kay Ace.

I called Denis to pick me up. Dumating naman siya at hinatid ako sa tapat ng Ventura Estates. I was walking at the entrance when the guard suddenly stopped me.

“For security purposes lang po, Ma’am.” anang guard.

“I have an appointment with Mr. Ace Holden Ventura,” ani ko sa babaeng nasa lobby nang makawala ako sa bodyguard pagkatapos akong padaanin sa scanner.

Nakita ko namang may tawagan ang attendant sa kabilang linya.

“What is your name, Miss?”

“Britney Clair Cortez,” pagsagot ko sa tanong nito.

Their building was impressive. The walls and the chandeliers they have were pretty matched to the theme of their interior. The sofa at the waiting part of this lobby was looked fine it’s also matched the color of the wall.

“Pasok na raw po kayo Ma’am. Sa thirtieth floor po ang office ni Mr. Ventura.”

Nakangisi naman akong naglakad patungong elevator. Pagpasok ko ay bahagya pa akong nagulat ng makasabay kong muli si Lisa.

Oh, the bitch is here again. Well, she has the right now to be here. She’s engaged to Ace anyway. The elevator closed and I press the thirtieth floor. Habang siya naman ay tahimik lang na nakatayo sa aking tabi.

“So kay Ace din ba ang punta mo? Hindi ka pa rin ba nakaka move on sa kaniya kaya nandito ka?” she suddenly spoke.

Napataas naman ang isang kilay ko sa tanong niya.

“I’m not that desperate like you,” ani ko.

Nakita ko naman sa salamin na nasa harapan ko ang kaniyang repleksyon. She looked annoyed because of what I just said.

“At least ako fiancé na niya ngayon, eh ikaw? Naghihirap na nga naghahabol pa rin.”

This bitch! Akala niya naman maiinggit niya ko sa engagement ring na ipinapakita niya sa akin.

Oh well, if she only knew how much I hate his fiancé including his family and her. And what she just said? Naghihirap ako? Pathetic. That’s why I’m here to tell him my proposal.

I smirked at that thought.

Bumukas ang elevator at nauna na akong lumabas. May nakita pa akong lalaking palapit sa akin.

“Ms. Cortez, I’m here to escort you to Mr. Ventura’s office.”

“What did you say? You don’t even have to escort her to Ace’s office.” biglang singit ni Lisa sa aking likuran nang marinig ang sinabi ng nakaunipormeng lalaki sa akin.

“But that is Mr. Ventura-”

“No but’s! Just leave her here alone!”

What wrong with Lisa? I didn’t know that she’s a jealous fiancé. Where is her class? So scandalous. Hindi pa rin nagbabago.

“Thank you mister but I can guide myself. Siya nalang ang i-escort mo at baka maligaw.” Tinapunan ko pa ng nang-aasar na tingin si Lisa saka ako umalis at tinalikuran sila.

Nakita ko naman ang pinaka malaking office ng floor na ito. This may be his office. I went inside and I saw Ace back as I entered the doorway. He’s sitting on his swivel chair at nakamasid sa labas ng building.

His office is like Mr. Alvaro’s office, kita rin ang kalakhan ng siyudad. Iba lang ang theme ng kaniyang opisina dahil pulos brown at black lang ang makikitang kulay rito.

I cleared my throat for him to notice me.

“Take your seat.” malamig na anito sa akin habang hindi pa rin hinaharap ang aking gawi.

Tumalima naman ako at tinungo ang harapan ng kaniyang lamesa. Tunog lang ng stilettos ko ang nagbibigay ng ingay sa pagitan namin. Hindi ako naupo at nanatiling nakatayo lang akong humarap sa kaniya.

I prepared everything I planned. I’m here to give him the papers of our office and the filed papers that he needs to sign up for our contract I made for us two.

“Put down the copies on my table.”

Ibinaba ko naman ang sinabi niya.

“I’m here not just for this.” mataman kong sinabi sa kaniya.

He is still not turning to me. I can smell his expensive perfume from where I was standing.

“What else is your reason for coming here?” malalim at hindi mawala ang lamig sa tono ng pananalita niya.

“I want you to give me back the company. I know you can do something about it.”

Sandali siyang nanahimik. Naiirita na ako at hindi niya man lang ako hinaharap. Kailangan kong mabawi ang kumpaniya at ’yon nalang ang makakatulong sa amin ni uncle ngayon.

Nakita ko pang gumalaw ang kamay niya at saka ipinatong ito sa gilid ng kaniyang upuan.

“It’s not under my control.” humarap na siya sa akin ngayon at hindi ko naman siya magawang tingnan.

What?

“You will do it or not?” nagbabanta kong tanong sa kaniya.

I shifted my gaze to him. He’s now wearing his white button-down shirt na nakatupi hanggang siko nito. His body became more masculine. Agad akong nag-iwas ng tingin do’n. His cold glares turned directly on me.

Hindi naman ako nagpasindak at matapang ko siyang tiningnan sa mga mata.

“What? Are you threatening me now? Like what you always did before?”

“No, unless you give me what I want.” matamang ani ko.

“I won’t, do whatever you want I don’t care.” pagmamatigas niya pa.

Napangisi pa ako ng bahagya. Inuubos talaga niya ang pasensya ko.

“You will regret this,” Mariing tingin ang iginawad ko sa kaniya.

“Is that all? Now, you may leave my office.” aniya at saka ako tinalikurang muli.

“Ace! Hey, let’s go for lunch.” narinig ko mula sa pinto ang malanding boses ni Lisa.

Nakita ko pang lumapit ito kay Ace at saka hinila patayo ng upuan. Napasulyap naman si Ace sa akin habang hinihila siya ni Lisa.

I let a heavy sigh at saka ako naiiritang umalis ng opisina niya. Kung hindi ko siya mapapapayag sa gusto ko, pwes, maghintay siya sa susunod kong gagawin.

The next day I planned to shoot one of their floors. Just to scare the people who lived there. Gabi na at mag-isa lang ako sa plano kong ito.

Ibinigay naman sa akin ni Johnson ang baril na kakailanganin kong gamitin dahil mula sa malayo ako aasinta at magpapatama.

I was now here at the tower just a few buildings away from their estate’s building. Natatanaw ko mula rito ang opisina ni Ace na madilim na at wala ng tao.

Nakapikit ang isa kong matang itinutok ang baril mula sa kaniyang salamin ng opisina niya. Then slowly I pulled the trigger. Napangisi pa ako nang maasinta ko ang kaniyang upuan.

I fired several bullets into his office until I saw the light on the ground floor turned on. I immediately left and changed my black outfit into a fitted black dress.

Parang walang nangyari akong naglakad paalis ng tower at sumakay ng sasakyan ni Johnson.

“Naughty girl,” iiling iling na aniya.

Nakita ko nanamang nagkalat ang mga pulis sa ibaba ng building at may iilang mga taong nag panic ang nasa labas na rin ng gusali ngayon.

Hindi malabong malaman nila kung saang parte ng building nagmula ang bala ng baril. I get my phone and called Denis.

“Nadelete mo ba lahat? Just make sure na wala kang naitira kung hindi ay mabubulilyaso tayo.” pagtukoy ko sa CCTV footages na nahagip akong pababa ng tower na pinagpuwestuhan ko kanina.

“Yes, I deleted all the footage. Walang ano mang bakas ang makikita at makakapagsabing ikaw ang may gawa.”

“Good,” then I dropped the call.

Alam kong naghihinala na si Ace sa mga panahong ito kung sino ba ang may gawa nito. Hindi pa ako nakukuntento sa mga ginagawa ko sa kanila. Puro paninindak pa lang ang lahat ng ito.

Kaya sa susunod kong hakbang na gagawin ay sisiguraduhin kong may mapapahamak na. Just wait for your launching and I’ll get my real revenge there.

And I can’t wait for that day to happen.

Kabanata 32

Kabanata 32

Sleep

Naging usap-usapan at naging laman na naman ng balita at ilang pahayagan ang nangyari sa opisina ni Ace. I read all the articles about it all and I can say that they still didn’t find out if who’s behind it all.

Ngayon ay nagpapahinga ako sa veranda habang tinatanaw ang kulay asul na kalangitan gaya nang madalas kong ginagawa noon.

The launching of their first-ever new branch of OV Hotel here in the Philippines is near. I have my plans and it was all set up.

“Hija,” I heard Manang called me.

Napatingin naman ako sa gawi niya. Tumatanda na talaga si Manang dahil mas lalong nadedepina ang kulubot sa mukha nito.

“Bakit po, Manang? May kailangan po ba kayo?” nakangiting tanong ko rito.

“Wala naman hija, gusto ko lang makipagkuwentuhan sa’yo.”

Umayos ako ng upo.

“Ano po ’yon,?”

Ngumiti siya sa akin bago nagsalita.

“Alam kong nababalitaan mo rin ang sitwasyon ng mga Ventura, hindi ba?”

I was slightly shocked while I looked at her. I then looked away nang hindi ko na makayanan ang tingin sa akin ni Manang.

“Hija, alam kong may galit ka pa rin sa kanila. Hindi sila ang dapat na pagbuntungan mo ng galit kun’di ang taong pumatay sa mga magulang mo at hindi sila ‘yon. Nag-aalala ako sa’ yo dahil ayaw kong mapahamak ka.”

Ang sakit isipin na ang lahat ng ito ay nangyayari dahil sa mga taong pinagkatiwalaan ng mga magulang ko. Hindi ko sila mapapatawad sa oras na mapatunayan kong sila ang tunay na puno at dulo ng lahat ng ito.

I miss my Mom and Dad but they are not here anymore to comfort me. To care for me. To hugged and kissed me. I miss them so much.

“Blair, nandito lang ako at ang tiyuhin mo. Hindi mo kailangan kipkipin ’yang galit sa loob mo. Ilabas mo iyan sa amin lahat. Handa akong makinig sa iyo hija. Alam kong matagal mo na ’yang tinatago.”

“Pero Manang, hindi ba pwedeng sa kanila ko nalang ilabas lahat ng galit ko? They were supposed to take my revenge and they have all deserved it. Kulang pa nga kung tutuusin, pinapatay nila ang mga magulang ko.”

Hindi ko na napigilan pa ang pagpatak ng luha sa aking pisngi. I saw Manang come closer to me and hugged me.

I bit my lip as I hugged her back.

Gaya ng nauna kong plano ay pinalipas ko muna ang mga araw bago ko isagawa ang isa ko pang plano. Bahagya na ring humupa ang balitang tungkol sa opisina ni Ace dahil naging usap usapan naman ngayon ang tungkol sa paglulunsad nila ng bago nilang hotel.

“Blair, are you sure about this? Maraming tao ang mapapahamak kung itutuloy mo itong plano mo.” Johnson said as he drinks his vodka.

Nandito kami ngayon sa isang club. We are in the VIP lounge. Kaming dalawa lang.

I get my scotch and sipped on it.

“I’ve been planning this before so I’m sure. And please… wala kang ibang pagsasabihan.” I spoke to him as I stared into his eyes.

He looked away. “You know that I’m with you, right? I helped you, didn’t I? So why would I backstab you.” he seriously uttered.

I sighed in relief. In my next plan, sila lang dalawa ni Denis ang nakakaalam. And I trusted him.

“Bathroom break lang,” pagpapaalam ko sa kaniya. He just nodded.

Naglalakad ako patungong bathroom at sumasakit ang mata ko sa saliw ng mga ilaw. Napadaan ako sa isang counter at nabaling ang tingin sa isa sa mga lounges na kinukumpulan ng ilang kalalakihan at kababaihan.

I slightly raised my brow. The bachelor’s, huh. I saw Ace sitting there and seriously looking at the glass in his hand.

Namukhaan ko rin ang dalawang lalaking nakaupo malapit sa kaniya. It was his high school friends. And Lisa was also with them. Nakaupo ito katabi ni Ace.

I was about to turn my gaze away from them when our gaze met. Seryoso ang mga matang nakatingin siya sa gawi ko. His hair was a bit disheveled and the upper two-button of his white button-down shirt was unbuttoned.

My lips parted as I glance at his lips. He’s too far in me but I still feel his aura. His intimidating air that I always felt every time he is around.

Mariin naman akong napapikit at naglakad na patungong bathroom. He is here with Lisa again. His glare was intense like a hawk staring at me.

I went out of the bathroom afterward. Naglalakad na ako pabalik sa lounge namin ni Johnson nang may biglang lumapit sa akin at harangan ang gawi ko.

“Hi, miss.” he playfully said.

I seriously smirked at him.

“Hey, mister.” mahinang ani ko.

His smile grew wider when I spoke. He’s matured and I guess that he is one of the bachelors there.

“Wanna dance with me?” Tanong pa nito.

“Uh, no. I don’t want to dance, thanks.” naglakad na ako para sana lagpasan na siya nang harangan niyang muli ang aking daraanan.

Hmm. This man is so persistent huh.

“I’m sorry, but can I just give you a drink then? Just a shot, is that fine?” He persistently muttered.

Napakunot naman ang noo ko at napatingin ang mata ko sa gawi nila Ace. I caught him staring on my way, watching me from afar. Mas mariing tingin ang iginagawad niya sa akin ngayon.

Nakita ko pang hawakan ni Lisa ang braso niya at may ibinulong sa kaniya. But he didn’t bother to look at her way. He looked a bit hostile at the man in front of me.

“No thanks, marami na rin akong nainom.” Ani ko sa lalaking nasa aking harapan.

Nagugulat niya ako kunwareng tiningnan.

“If that’s what you want, miss.” bulong nito habang dahan dahang sumayaw sa harapan ko.

His hand slowly crawls down to my body. Pero bago pa ’yon mangyari ay nabayagan ko na siya.

“Don’t you ever dare touch me, mister,” I whispered to his ear after I impale my knees on his balls.

Nakahawak naman siya sa parte ng katawang natamaan ko sa kaniya habang nakatingin sa akin. I noticed that there were also people watching us. Ace’s group also looked at our way. I even saw how Lisa frowned when she saw me. I stared at her and rolled my eyes before I left the crowd.

“What happened there? Ayos ka lang ba?” Jhonson suddenly asked me.

Umiling lang ako. I sat beside him and get my glass to drink.

I don’t know if Ace knows that I am the mastermind of what is happening to them right now. Ace is not stupid for not knowing that.

Malikot ang ilaw sa dance floor habang naglalakad ako paalis. I was now slightly drunk, kaya hindi maayos ang paglalakad ko.

“I’ll give you a ride, Blair.”

“I’m fine Johnson. I texted Denis and he said that he is already outside.”

“I called the valet. Sa akin ka na sumakay kapag wala pa si Denis sa labas, alright?”

Hindi ko naman na sinagot pa si Johnson. Napangisi naman ako nang matanawan ko si Ace. He is still looking at me languidly. Naramdaman ko namang alalayan ako ni Johnson.

“Ma’am Blair,” Denis said as we got outside the club, he’s now here to fetch me.

“Denis is here, thank you for accompanying me, Johnson.” I hugged him before I went inside the car.

That night is our last encounter before the launching of their hotel. I was now walking in the hallway in the company I am working at when someone called me.

I turned to her way.

“Miss Cortez, pinapatawag po kayo ni Mr. Alvaro.” the girl looks shy as she said that.

“Sige,” pumasok naman na ako ng elevator patungong floor ni Mr. Alvaro.

I went inside his office at naabutan siyang may binabasa. Nag-angat naman siya ng tingin sa akin nang maramdamang nakapasok na ako ng kaniyang silid.

“Sorry for the urgent call,” he started.

“It’s alright Mr. Alvaro,”

“The Ventura send an invites to our company for their launching of OV Hotel and I want you to be with me on that night.”

Namilog naman ang aking mga mata at saglit pa na natigilan. Nagtataka naman akong napatingin sa kaniya. I could not attend the event because I couldn’t carry out my plan if I was there.

“You’re one of my best employees and and you’re promotion is near. Kaya mas maganda kung ikaw ang isasama kong dumalo lalo na at maraming businessmen ang pupunta so it means, all the elites are gonna be there.”

I can’t say no to Mr. Alvaro lalo na at malaki ang naitutulong niya sa akin. But I have to say no to him this time para sa mga plano kong dapat na gawin.

“But Mr. Alvaro, I still have a lot of work to do and will take care of that day. I can’t be with you-”

“Ipagpaliban mo muna iyan Ms. Cortez, I want you to attend with me.”

“I’m really sorry Mr. Alvaro but I can’t.”

Nakita ko naman siyang napabuntong-hininga.

“Okay, so mag overtime ka niyan sa susunod na araw?”

I sighed in relief. “Yes, I have a lot of pending works na hindi ko pa nagagawa.”

Tumango tango naman siya sa akin. Ani mong pinag-iisipan pa ang naging pagtanggi ko. But when I saw him gasped, I get that as a cue na hindi na niya ako pipilitin pa.

Sorry, but your employee is in the mood on that day, Mr. Alvaro. I said in my head then glance at him lightly with my lips plaster for a sweet smile.

“Hmm, that’s all.” he then dismissed.

Umalis na ako ng office niya. I was about to shut the door when I was outside when I heard him talking on the other line.

“She didn’t agree. Sa totoo lang hindi naman na dapat siyang sumama sa akin pero mapilit ka. What’s about my employee? Huh?”

Napakunot naman ang noo ko at saglit na ipinilig ang leeg para pakinggan ang kung anomang sasabihin niya.

“Ms. Cortez is really god damn gorgeous and sexy as hell, Ace. What’s about her? I know when you are serious or not in a woman.”

I gulped when I heard Mr. Alvaro. He’s talking with Ace. Agad namang nagpuyos ang nararamdaman ko. What he is up to? Pati ba naman si Mr. Alvaro ay kinukuntsaba niya para pahirapan ako? I can’t believe him.

I went home that day at hindi na tinapos pa ang pakikinig sa kanilang usapan. I have to prepared everything and all I can do is to set it all up before they knew my plan.

And when that special day came I took overtime in the office to make my plan. Gabi na at hindi pa rin ako umaalis ng opisina. This is the night that I will do my plan.

I was sitting on my chair inside my office. Habang ang laptop ko ay nasa aking harapan kung saan makikita ko ang lahat ng manggayari. Nakahanda na ang lahat at hindi ito pwedeng pumalpak dahil ito ang pinakamalaking event nila na sisirain ko.

I watch the people just arrived at the huge entrance while the Ventura’s are busy talking to the few guests near them. It was covered by the media. So it will blast the news if my plan happens to succeed.

Tonight is gonna be their best night with their associates and colleagues. Just have fun with them because that won’t take for last long.

I gritted my teeth as I looked at the screen. Napatingin naman ako sa cellphone kong nasa tabi ng aking laptop. It was ringing so I answered the call.

“Damn, woman. Just don’t let my parents get hurt. Text me kung kailangan na ba naming umalis dito.” ani Johnson sa kabilang linya.

He and his family were also invited to that event and they were one of the people inside of the building. I know that this plan will gonna be reckless.

“Yeah, don’t worry I will inform you.” Then I immediately ended the call. But Denis called me next so I answered him.

“Ma’am Blair, tapos na po ang pinapagawa niyo. We already cut the wires and shut down the electric power system of the OV Hotel.” anang tauhan kong si Denis na nasa kabilang linya.

“Good. Make sure that no one will know about this. That you have done it clean and safe. If you had left a mess I’ll turn you down. Are we clear?” I said on him, reprimanded.

“Yes, Ma’am. Copy,” aniya pagkatapos ay pinatay ko na ang tawag.

I texted Johnson like what I said.

The plan happens but when we took to the next step, it suddenly broke down when the hotel lights came back. I went out of my office at pagbaba ko nang makalabas ako ng building ay may kumuha sa akin.

The person behind this is the man who broke my young heart. Who made damage in my life. I felt angry for what he did to me. And now he is still not satisfied with what I am having right now.

Hindi ko hahayaang mauwi sa wala ang mga plano ko. Nag-uumpisa pa lang ako kaya hindi ako titigil. I had to get everything they took from me. I need justice for my parents. I will not allow this situation to stop me. I will make them pay for all the evil they have done to my family.

The fire is still burning on me and will not die as long as I do not burn the people who ruined my life.

I slowly opened my eyes and my tears rolled down my cheeks. Ang sugat ay nananatili pa ring sariwa kasabay ng mga alala kong hindi pa rin naghihilom.

The sun has now set and you can see nothing but darkness and the stars twinkling in the sky. Bumaba na rin ang tubig mula sa dalampasigan.

“Ma’am, halina kayo at madilim na. Bilin ni boss na huwag kayong hayaan ritong magtungo ng gabi.”

Hindi ko pinakinggan ang sinabi niya. It’s all Ace’s fault. Hindi na sana ako magtutungo rito kung hinayaan niya lang akong gawin ang plano ko.

He acts as if he cares about me even though the truth is not. Tumayo na ako at saka bumalik sa loob. Naaasiwa kong pinagmasdan ang mararangyang mga bagay na nakikita ko sa loob ng bahay na ito.

Pumunta ako ng dining at nakita ang kanilang hapag. Their kitchen looks so modern. I sat on the chair where my plate is. Mag-isa lang akong narito ngayon sa mahabang lamesa na ito.

May nakahaing mga pagkain na hindi ko alam kung sino ang naghanda. I finished my food before I went back to the room where they put me last night.

Nasaan na ba kasi si Denis? Hindi niya ba ako hinahanap ngayon? That was his job, to protect me, and yet he is not here. Uncle will be mad at him if he knew about this.

Hindi naman ako mapakali nang maalala ko si Manang na nag-aalala na sa akin ngayon. I didn’t tell her that I will be home late. Tapos ngayon ay isang araw na akong hindi umuuwi sa amin dahil sa pagkidnap sa akin ni Ace at pagdala sa islang ito.

Augh! This is really frustrating!

I need to go home but how? Nasaan na ba kasi si Ace at bakit hindi pa siya bumabalik hanggang ngayon? I lie on my bed as I looked at the ceiling. What should I do? I’m stuck here in this island and no one can help me.

Walang ibang tao akong nakikita kun’di ang mga tauhan lang ni Ace. Kaya paanong makakaalis ako dito kung bantay sarado ako ng mga ito?

Maybe I can think of another way out of this freaking island. I groaned in so much frustration. Then, later on, I sighed loudly. Hindi ako makatulog at mapakali sa kakaisip kung paano ako makakaalis dito.

Wait. What about Johnson? He knew my plan at hindi iyon natuloy. Maybe he is now finding me to asked what happened. But where he can find me? My phone and laptop were not in me.

Oh! Yes! My phone! I need to find and get my phone back. That is the only way to contact Johnson and Denis to tell them what happened. I need their help now.

Tumayo ako at lumabas na ng aking silid. When I came out, I did not see any security guard outside my room. Napakagat labi naman ako nang makita ang maraming silid ng bahay na ito.

Where do I start?

Marahan akong naglakad sa kabilang bahagi ng hagdan. I bent down when I saw someone downstairs lurking around. He was holding a piece on his ear. It’s like a device which he can talk to his companion.

Napatingin siya sa itaas kaya agad akong yumuko. It’s already midnight and I noticed he was alone guarding the whole house.

Naglakad ako at binuksan ang unang pintuan. Wala akong ibang nakita roon maliban sa kama at ilang kagamitan nang makapasok ako sa loob.

It seems like it was an old room. So I went to the other room and it was just the library. Wala akong nakitang espesyal na silid sa gawing ito.

Kaya dahan dahan naman akong naglakad patungo sa gawi ng kuwarto ko. There are only three consecutive rooms there.

The room beside mine was like the usual bedroom like mine. Napanghinaan naman na ako ng loob nang makitang isang silid nalang ang hindi ko pa nabubuksan.

I need to see and get my cellphone so I can get out of here.

Kaso ay mabilis na nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang may marinig akong mga yabag paakyat ng hagdan.

I was nervous so hurriedly ran to the last room that I haven’t yet opened when I heard footsteps walking upstairs.

Hindi ako mapakali habang binubuksan ang pinto. I still had a hard time opening the door because they might hear me. I avoided making any noise while closing the door when I finally get to open it.

I sighed loudly as I leaned against the back of the door when I completely get inside.

At nang imulat ko ang aking mata ay nakita ko ang isang king-size bed. It was the master’s bedroom. This room is so manly. From the color of the walls and the bed, pillowcases, and the carpet. It all screams in manliness. And also the smell of this room seems familiar to me.

The room was huge, bigger than mine. I can even saw the balcony here. I didn’t turn on the light as I roam my eyes inside while my feet are on their walk.

I stopped looking at things when my eyes caught a table where a laptop was placed. I hurriedly walked over to the table near beside the huge bed and then opened it.

It wasn’t my laptop. Kaya naman napakunot ang noo ko nang makitang hindi ito sa akin. It also has a password! Damn it!

Napatingin ulit ako sa paligid para tingnan kung may makikita pa ba akong makakatulong sa akin paalis dito. Then I saw a drawer on the side table. Nanlalaki naman ang mata kong lumapit do’n at saka binuksan.

But then, I stopped when I felt someone’s presence behind me.

I quickly turned my gaze behind me and I was surprised to see Ace staring at me seriously and…no clothes on. He’s half-naked.

Nakapamewang siyang nakatingin sa akin ng diretso. His hair and body were moist. The water from his damp hair was dripping in his well-toned chest.

I swallowed hard as I trace his body.

“What are you doing?” he asked in a deep voice as his eyes glaring at me darkly.

My heart skipped a beat. Nawala ako sa tamang pag-iisip kung ano nga bang ginagawa ko rito. Medyo madilim ang paligid pero nakikita ko pa rin siya.

Then I snapped out of my reverie. When I felt him walked near me that his body was now very close to me. Sa sobrang lapit niya sa akin ay napaatras na ako sa drawer na nasa aking likuran. My chest tightened as I started to feel the nervousness.

I then tried to push his chest to get away from him. Ngunit bahagyang nabasa lang ang braso kong dumikit sa kaniyang dibdib. Nakita ko naman siyang mariin at madilim lang ang mga matang nakatutok sa akin ng tuwid.

I gulped for the second time. Naiilang akong tingnan siya sa ganiyang ayos. His topless hot body was sending different electricity on me. I feel like I’m getting ground with each step he took that closes our short distance. Tiningala ko siya at saka tiningnan ng masama.

“Pakawalan mo na ako Ace. I told you, I have nothing. Nakuha mo na ang lahat ng meron ako, kaya pakawalan mo na ako! I need to get out of here!”

I saw him clenched his jaw. He cocked his head to the other side. He tied the towel on his waist before he turned his back on me.

Napasinghap naman ako nang tuluyan na siyang humiwalay at tumalikod sa akin. But my forehead creased when I saw how perfect his back is. The ripped and the muscles are visible even on his back.

“Not really, I haven’t got everything you have yet,” he said in a humid tone.

Humarap siya sa akin at deretsong tumingin sa aking mga mata. Malayo na ang aming pagitan ngayon pero ang riin ng kaniyang mga mata ay ani mong walang distansyang pumipigil sa pagtutok sa akin.

“So you are not even satisfied with what you have and what you’ve done to me?” I asked him in disbelief.

Nakita kong umigting muli ang kaniyang panga habang ang kaniyang mga kamay ay nakakuyom. He seems controlling his anger.

“I want to get even Ace, but I have nothing. Because you got everything I have! You ruined my life, you killed my parents! You evil brute! How dare you doing this to me!” I fired to him.

He looked at me indulgently menace this time.

“Tell me, did you planned this all? And your family is supporting that evil who killed my parent’s kaya hindi pa rin siya mahuli huli ng mga police hanggang ngayon? Tama ba ako, ha?!” Eksaheradang tanong ko sa kaniya.

“Sagutin mo ako Ace-”

“Shut up, Blair. Over the past few years, I have done nothing but to find the person who killed your parents. So don’t blame me for what you are accusing me of. Because I know that you know that I can’t do that to your parents.” He firmly uttered in a stoic voice.

I frowned at him. Hindi ako naniniwala sa mga sinasabi niyang puro kasinungalingan lang naman. They are just acting that they are helping us to resolve my parent’s case. Kahit na ang totoo naman ay sila ang may kasalanan.

Gusto lang nilang lumabas na mabuti sa mata ng mga tao dahil si Dad ay naging malapit sa mga Ventura kaya ginagawa nila ito. So I will not believe what he just said. He once lied to me and I can’t believe him anymore.

Nakita ko pa siyang humakbang palapit sa akin. Mariin pa rin ang tinging iginagawad ko sa kaniya.

“Matulog ka na,” he suddenly said.

“Hindi ako matutulog hangga’t hindi mo sa akin ibinabalik ang cellphone ko.”

He raised his one brow.

“No phones or any gadgets are allowed in my place.”

“I don’t care! Just give it back to me.”

“Babalik ka ng kuwarto mo o dito ka matutulog sa kwarto ko?” mariing tanong nito sa akin.

My eyes widened at what he said. Then I blink twice. Hindi makapaniwalang tingin lang ang nagawa ko sa kaniya at saka niya ako tinalikuran.

Augh! I hate you so much! Pumasok siya sa gawi ng bathroom at mabilis na lumabas na tanging black boxer shorts lang ang suot.

Mariin naman akong napapikit nang lumakad siya patungo sa aking gawi na tanging ’yon lang ang suot.

“What? Do you want to sleep in my bed or you go back to your room now? Choose Blair,” walang halong pang-aasar ang kaniyang boses. Seryoso at mariin niya iyong sinabi sa akin.

At nang imulat ko ang aking mga mata ay matalim ko lang siyang tiningnan sa mga mata. At saka padabog akong nagmartsa palabas ng kuwarto niya. At saka padarag kong isinara ang pinto ng kaniyang silid.

I can’t believe him. He just only wants me to get out of his room and he’s giving me a choice like that?

Hindi ko man lang nakuha ang pakay ko kung bakit ba ako pumasok ng kuwarto na iyon. I didn’t even know that he is there. Dahil wala naman akong narinig na kahit anong ingay na nagsasabing dumating na siya kanina pa. Wala naman akong chopper na narinig kaya hindi ko inasahang narito na pala siya.

I went inside my room. Nahiga ako sa malaking kama at saka mariing ipinikit ang aking mga mata. Why is this all happening in my life? I felt stupid for being here with him.

My life is totally fucked up and he is the reason for it. I want to get out of here. I don’t want to see him. I want to stay away from him.

Because I don’t want to get hurt. I don’t want to get hurt because of him again.

Kabanata 33

Kabanata 33

Past

Nagising ako dahil sa sinag ng araw na tumatama sa aking mukha. I sat on my bed as I looked at the wall. The curtains are off. Kaya tumatama ang sinag ng araw sa aking mukha.

Sinong nag-alis ng kurtina? Hinawi ko ang buhok ko habang naglalakad patungo sa balkonahe. I slide the door and went out.

Napakagandang pagmasdan ang ganitong klase ng tanawin sa umaga. The sounds of the waves on the shore were relaxing and the sun that touches my fairer skin.

I closed my eyes as I breathe.

Napakunot ang noo ko nang may marinig akong ingay sa ibaba. Lumapit ako sa barandilya at saka dumungaw para makita kung ano iyon.

Then my brow arched when I saw Ace standing in front of his guards. It’s like he is dealing with them. Bahagya pa akong nawindang nang tumingin ito sa gawi ko.

He saw me looking at them from here at the balcony of my room and his eyes did not leave mine. I looked away.

Bumalik na ako sa loob. He really think that I’m going to escape here, huh? Well, unfortunately, I can’t.

This island is fully guarded and I can’t even think about how I will escape. The only plan I know is to find my gadgets so that I can contact Johnson or Denis.

I sighed as I open the door of my room to went out and I was slightly shocked by Ace’s presence.

“Morning, let’s eat breakfast,” he grunted hugely.

Tahimik lang siyang nakatingin sa akin at wala akong mabakas na kahit anong emosyon mula sa kaniyang ekpresyon. I didn’t speak. I walked first as I ignored him. And I felt him followed me down the stairs.

Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko maiwasang mamangha sa mansyong ito. It’s so luxurious and grandiose. Everything is made of gold and silver. The things here are all modern except for furniture that complements the theme of this mansion.

I sat on my chair and silently started eating my food. Nadatnan kong may nakahanda ng umagahan sa lamesa na mukhang si Ace ang nagpahanda. The food looks tasty and I wonder who prepared these all.

Napatingin ako sa harap ko namg marinig kong mahinang tumikhim si Ace.

“What?” I asked him out of nowhere.

“Nothing,” he just drawled.

I rolled my eyes and didn’t mind him.

“Do you have something to do later?” He then said in the middle of the meal.

Hindi ako bumaling ng tingin sa kaniya at nakatuon lang ang paningin ko sa aking pagkain.

“Wala. And what you expect me to do? I’m stuck in this freaking island,” I irritatedly said.

Hindi naman na siya nagsalita pa nang tumugon ako. Seryoso lang ang madilim niyang mga matang nakatuon sa akin ngayon. At kalauna’y naisipan kong muli na magsalita.

“Don’t worry, I have no plans in getting inside of your room again,” I said sarcastically.

I smirked at him. Tumaas naman ang isang kilay niya, animong nagtatanong sa sinabi ko.

He placed his fork and knife on his plate before he spoke.

“Is that so? Mas mabuti ngang huwag ka nang pumasok pang muli ng aking silid. It’s not good seeing you there.”

My lips parted a bit. Bahagya akong nainsulto sa sinabi niya. What does he mean?

“I’m just there because I’m finding my things. And for Pete’s sake, I’m not there because of you. At isa pa, I find your room stinky. I don’t like the smell. So I will never go back there.” I stagy said to him. I’m just actually lying about the scents of his room to annoy him.

“Hmm. You didn’t like my smell?” he nonchalantly asked.

I sipped on my glass.

“Yup, and I mostly hated the owner of that stinky smell.” I stood up at saka ko siya iniwang mag-isa sa hapag.

That brute! He kidnapped me and now I’m annoyed by his actions. It seems like we are doing it normally.

I sat on the sofa. I need to think of a way on how I will get rid of him. I can’t stay here for long. I’m worried about Manang Soling.

Nakita kong umalis si Ace, at kinausap ang isa sa mga tauhan niya mayamaya. Kailangan kong makuha ang mga gamit ko. That is the only way.

Kaya naman tahimik akong umakyat ng hagdan. Napatingin tingin pa ako sa paligid. The guard is not here inside the mansion, kaya malaya akong makakapaghanap dahil nasa labas silang lahat at kinakausap ni Ace.

Lumapit ako sa pintong pinasukan ko kagabi and it was Ace’s room. I slowly open the door. Then the smell of his expensive perfume filled my nose.

Napasinghap ako ro’n at saka marahan akong naglakad papasok sa loob. Nagmamadali akong naglakad patungo sa drawer na nakita ko kagabi. At nang makita ko iyon ay dalidali kong nilapitan iyon.

Mabilis ang kabog ng aking dibdib habang dahan dahan kong binubuksan ang drawer. Napamaang naman ako nang makitang wala iyong laman.

I let out a heavy sighed.

“You said you’ll never go back here?”

Nagulat ako at agad na bumilis ang kabog ng aking dibdib sa kaba ng marinig ko ang boses ni Ace sa aking likuran.

“Bakit mo ba ako dinala sa lugar na ito?”

Hinarap ko siya at tinapunan ng naglalagablab kong mga mata. Seryoso naman siyang nakatingin lang sa akin.

“Let me go, Ace! You have nothing to do with me. At kung sa tingin mo ay titigilan ko na kayo bilang kapalit sa kalayaan ko rito, ngayon pa lang sinasabi ko na sayong hindi. I won’t let you be to happy.”

Diretso siyang nakatingin sa akin. His grey eyes became darker.

“I just only need proof that it’s your family who planned it all. And this! What you are doing to me is already enough evidence.”

“Shut it, Blair. My family didn’t plan anything.”

“So why you’re defensive? Can’t take the bullets of truth? Huh?” I took a step near him I asked that.

His jaw was clenching. I equaled his glares on me.

“If that’s what you want to believe.” aniya at saka umalis.

How dare him! He’s really doing this because of his family!

Hindi ko makita ang laptop ko and even my phone I can’t find it. What is he up to? Bakit niya ba ’to ginagawa?

Mariin kong ipinikit ang aking mga mata habang pinapahinga ang aking sarili sa lahat ng iniisip. I have to find a way. I can’t be stuck here with him.

Nakahiga ako ngayon sa isa sa mga sun lounger. The big umbrella was between the loungers. I am wearing a black one-piece swimsuit as I lay here to rest myself.

Napag-isipan kong maligo muna ng dagat at magpahinga. I’m so exhausted of thinking a way on how I will escape here. And for goodness sake! I’m on an island! Paano ako makakatakas rito? Ni hindi rin ako sigurado kung sakaling makuha ko man ang cellphone ko ay may signal dito.

It’s all frustrating to think kaya I’m here lying in the sunlounger to refresh my mind. Bumangon ako at saka naupo. Napakunot ang noo ko nang matanawan ko si Ace na nakatayo sa dalampasigan.

He is only wearing his black board shorts. His well-toned body was now shining by the sunlight.

His backs built was perfect. From his broad shoulders, down to the two-deep dimples below the back of him. The biceps and his strong arms. The veins were visible even he is far from me, I can notice it.

He is straightly looking at the waves of the sea. He seems that his in deep thoughts. I then looked away when I noticed myself thinking about what he is doing. I remove my robe then stood up.

I walk towards the shore. I swim for a minute.

Pag-ahon ko ilang sandali nang matapos ako sa paglangoy ay nakita ko si Ace na malapit sa kinaroroonan ko. He looked at me strained. Nag-iwas naman ako ng tingin at hindi nalang siya pinansin.

Tinuyo ko muna ang sarili ko bago ako naupo sa sun-lounger. Agad ko namang itinaas ang tingin ko kay Ace nang maramdaman kong nakalapit na siya sa akin. Nag-iwas din akong muli nang mapansin kong mariin pa rin ang tinging iginagawad niya sa akin.

I can’t look at him straight in the eyes when he’s like that. Wala naman akong ginagawang masama pero ang tingin niya ay parang nang-aakusa. Ganito naman na talaga siya noon pa, but I still can’t look at him that long. I badly admit that he still affects me. He’s intimidating air that I feel again.

I saw him at my peripheral vision sat on the sunlounger beside me. Nagpanggap naman akong hindi ko siya napansin. I shut my eyes and pretended to be asleep.

Alon lang ang tangi kong naririnig. Hindi naman siya nagsalita, maybe he thinks that I’m sleeping. Hanggang sa hindi ko namalayang tuluyan na nga akong nakatulog.

At nang magmulat ako ng aking mga mata ay naupo ako at napakurap kurap nang makita ang isang table sa tabi ko.

“Nakatulog ka kaya hinatid ko nalang dito ang mga pagkain. Let’s eat, I know you are starving.” ani Ace na nasa harapan ko na pala.

Napatingin naman ako sa suot ko. I am now wearing my robe. Napakunot ang noo ko habang itinatali iyon. I don’t remember wearing this before I fell asleep. Hindi nalang ako nagsalita pa at nilantakan ko na ang mga pagkaing nakahanda.

It was all seafood. And I was struggling to open the king crab when Ace suddenly takes it away from me. Nagulat naman akong napatingin sa kaniya.

He parted it easily like it was just that so simple to open. He then gives it to me.

“Thanks,” I said it in almost whispered.

Tumingin lang siya sa akin at saka nagpatuloy sa pagkain. Nasa sun-lounger pa rin ako nang mag-hapon na. Ace was still beside me. We are not talking to each other simula nang matapos kaming mag lunch. Ayaw ko rin siyang kausapin at pansinin kaya hangga’t maaari ay iniiwasan ko ang kaniyang gawi.

“How was your life for the past years?” biglang tanong niya na bumasag sa katahimikang nakapagitna sa aming dalawa.

Nakaramdam naman ako ng kirot sa aking dibdib nang maalala ang mga nangyari sa akin noon. It was all a burden to me until now. It is still bugging me if why is that all happened to my life.

Mapait akong nakatiim siyang hinarap siya.

“I’m sorry,” he then growled largely.

“Is that all you can say?”

He looked away. He licked his lower lip.

“Did you even have a boyfriend?” Tanong pa niya na mas nagpatigil sa akin.

“Are you serious, Ace? You made my life miserable and that is what you are asking me?” napailing-iling pa ako sa kaniya.

I can’t believe him! They put my life on fire and nothing left in me. And he just asked me that?

“I didn’t mean to ask that. I’m sorry.”

I rolled my eyes in so much irritation.

“Ikaw, how’s your life? Your life must be having fun after your family got everything we have. You must be contented now.” I mocked bitterly.

Mabilis ang naging baling ng tingin niya sa akin nang sinabi ko iyon.

“Let’s not talk about my parents,” mariing aniya.

“Then stop bothering me! Don’t ask me stupid things. And can you please stay away from me? I can’t take it to be with you.” I leered at him afterward.

Saglit na katahimikan uli ang namayani sa pagitan naming dalawa.

Nakita ko siyang umalis na. Well, I don’t care about his life though. For sure they are still not contented on what they have kaya niya ito ginagawa sa akin ngayon. And for all I know, wala na silang makukuha pang kahit anong ari arian pa sa amin.

Nagdilim na ang paligid at hindi ko na nakita pa si Ace simula ng umalis siya kanina at iwanan ako sa dalampasigan. Nasa loob lang ako ng mansyon at hindi alam kung ano ang maaaring pagkaabalahan.

I went to the kitchen to get some water. Napatingin ako sa paligid at napansing wala talagang kahit na sino rito ang maaaring magluto. So who’s cooking our food then?

I opened the fridge at may nakitang karne ng manok don. I’m bored and I’m already starving. It’s seven in the evening and Ace was still not here.

Inilapag ko sa hapag ang niluto kong chicken adobo nang maisipan kong magluto na ng gabihan. I learned to cook this from Manang Soling, hindi ako gano’n kasarap magluto but I can say that the taste of this was good.

I was about to sit on my chair when I noticed something seemed missing. Then I remember Ace. Where is that brute?

Well, maybe he can cook his own food right? And where the hell is him right now? And I paused when I remember what I just said to him earlier. I just told him to not bother me and now he’s gone?

I sighed and eat. Tinirhan ko nalang siya ng ulam in case na gusto niyang kumain pagbalik niya. I slept that night without noticing his comeback.

Kinabukasan ay maaga akong nagising. Pababa na ako ng hagdan nang maamoy ko ang mabangong amoy mula sa kusina. I walked towards the kitchen and my eyes widened to see Ace.

Nakatalikod ito sa akin at walang damit pang itaas. He is wearing his black apron nang mapansin kong may nakatali sa kaniyang baywang. His hair was disheveled, looks like he just got up from the bed.

I swallowed when he noticed me watching him. I then cleared my throat when his glace locked on me. But then I looked away and walk towards the ref to get a glass of water.

Hindi naman niya ako pinuna at tahimik lang siyang nagluluto. So he is the chef here? Napaisip pa ako sa mga pagkaing kinakain ko ng mga nakaraang araw. It was all delicious.

Natuon naman ang tingin ko sa dining table at naalala ang adobong niluto ko kagabi.

“The breakfast is ready. Kumain ka na,” he only said before he removed his apron.

Nagtataka naman ako sa sinabi niya. Hinanda niya sa lamesa ang mga pagkaing niluto niya.

“Wait, you are not going to dine with me?” I inquired.

He didn’t look at me, umalis siya matapos niyang mailapag ang lahat. Slowly, I watched him walking away. I am annoyed by his actions. He cooked me food and now he’s just letting me to eat these all alone?

Nang mananghalian ay ganoon pa rin siya. He prepared the food for me and he just goes away. Hindi ko alam kung matutuwa ba ako o hindi dahil hindi ko siya nakikita ngayon. He didn’t talk to me also.

I want him to let me and do not bother me. And now that he is doing my favor ako naman itong hindi mapalagay. Nakaupo siya sa isa sa mga sun-lounger nang matanaw ko siyang kausap ang isa sa mga tauhan niya ro’n.

Malayo ako sa kanila kaya hindi ko maririnig ang pinag-uusapan nila. Napansin niya ang tingin ko kaya napatingin siya sa gawi ko. I was here standing near the shore but on the other side of where the lounges are.

Then my forehead creased when I saw them walking inside the mansion. As if I will hear them from here. Tss.

Pumasok na rin ako at tinungo nalang silid ko at napagpasiyahang matulog na lamang. At nang magising ako at tumingin sa orasang nasa itaas. It’s now five PM, I slept for three hours. Bumangon na ako at saka bumaba na ng hagdan.

Napansin kong nasa loob ngayon ang mga guards ni Ace. Hindi ko nalang sila pinansin at saka lumabas ng bahay para magtungo ng dalampasigan. I went to the shore to watched the sunset.

May nakasunod sa aking isang bodyguard nang masundan niya ako ng tingin palabas ng bahay. Hindi ko nalang siya pinansin dahil medyo malayo naman ito sa akin.

I want to go home. Paniguradong hinahanap na ako nila Manang at Uncle ngayon. I don’t want them to get worried about me. At hindi ko alam kung ayos lang din ba sila sa mansion ngayon.

Nasa loob na ako ng bahay pagkatapos mapanood ang paglubog ng magandang haring araw nang mapansing wala pa rin si Ace dito. He’s not going outside for this day. And he seems to avoid me since yesterday.

At nang magtungo ako ng dining ay nakita kong nakahanda na ang dinner ko. He’s not here again. Natanaw kong nakasunod pa rin sa akin ang bodyguard niya. Siya ’yong madalas na kausap ni Ace. Naglakad ako palapit sa kaniya.

“Where is Ace?”

“Umalis siya kanina bago magdilim,”

Bahagya naman akong nagulat sa sinabi niya.

“Saan siya nagtungo?” kuryoso kong tanong.

Dahil hindi ko naman namalayang umalis siya kanina. Or he is just here in his room again?

“May nilakad ho siya, Ma’am. Baka sa susunod na araw pa siya makakabalik.”

What? Paano siya nakaalis? Wala akong narinig na kahit anong ingay ng helicopter kanina. Napabuntong-hininga ako.

Hindi na ako nang-usisa pa at baka magtaka siya. Kaya umakyat na ako ng hagdan at natanawan ko ang apat na gwardya na magbabantay sa palapag na ito.

Naiinis ko silang tiningnan. Wala naman na akong pwede pang paghanapan ng mga gamit ko dahil halos lahat ng silid rito ay napasukan ko na at wala akong mahanap. And now the guards are all here?

I went inside my room and sat on my bed. Kung wala si Ace ngayon at sa susunod pa siya makakauwi, araw araw na ganito ang mangyayari sa akin?

Oh god. I wish he’ll come back tomorrow.

The next morning I’m expecting him to be here but I failed. He is still not here. Wala na ring nakahandang pagkain para sa akin. I sighed as I went to the kitchen at naghanap ng pwedeng lutuin.

Lunchtime na at gano’n rin ang ginawa ko. Lumabas akong muli pagkaraan at nagpunta sa mga lounger. Halos ganito lang ang ginagawa ko sa araw araw. Paulit ulit.

I’m not going to swim this time. Tapos na rin akong mananghalian kaya napagdesisyunan kong magtungo nalamang muna rito para magpahangin. Hindi ko maiwasang isipin si Ace kung bakit hindi pa siya bumabalik. Last time na umalis siya ay bumalik rin siya kinabukasan. Kaya nagtataka ako kung bakit ngayon ay hindi pa siya bumabalik.

It’s not that I want to see him, okay? I’m just feeling guilty. I know that I shouldn’t be. But I just can’t help it.

He just asked me stupid things and what he expects me to respond on that? My life is in embers. All my life, I live in fire because of them. All I want is him to stop asking me those things caused it’s not my thing. Or else that is why he’s not here because she’s with his fiance. I almost forgot about it.

Natulog ako ng gabing iyon at pilit na inaalis ang isiping iyon na baka umuwi siya kay Lisa. Hindi na ako nag-dinner at natulog nalang ako agad nang gabing iyon.

The next day, I woke up late. Walang sigla akong bumangon at nagtungo ng bathroom. I went out of my room afterward and walk downstairs. I was about to cook my food when I got in the kitchen but my eyes caught the table.

I was surprised to see the usual breakfast that my Mom always made for me. It was all my favorite. Napakunot ang noo ko habang marahan akong naglalakad palapit sa lamesa.

“Who made all of-”

“Me,” agad kong hinanap ang pinagmulan ng boses na iyon.

My lips parted when I saw Ace. Nag-umpisa ang hindi mapangalanang kabog sa dibdib ko habang ang aming mga tingin ay nagtagpo. It’s like I was hyperventilating the moment I saw his face.

Mahina akong bumuntong-hininga at saka nag-iwas ng tingin kalaunan nang hindi na iyon matagalan.

“Nakabalik ka na pala. Akala ko bukas pa ang uwi mo? Napaaga ka ata.” ani ko habang ang tingin ay nasa ibaba.

“Kagabi pa ako dumating.”

Napatigil naman ako sa ginagawa.

“G-Ganon ba,” ani ko, nangangapa ng salita.

I can’t look at him straight in the eye so I remain to stare at the floor.

“Yeah, and you didn’t eat dinner. Why? You know how to cook, right?”

Napaangat naman ako ng tingin sa kaniya ngayon.

“Hindi kasi ako gutom at saka napagod ako sa maghapon.”

I tried to look at him straight and luckily I did.

Before he said something, I sat on the chair. I also saw him walking towards the table near the chair beside me.

“Have you missed me?” he asked profusely that made eyes almost popped out.

Kumunot ang noo ko sa tanong niya at mabilis na umiling.

“W-Why would I? You’re not even my boyfriend. And you kidnapped me, so why would I-I miss you?” Naiirita kong sabi sa kaniya.

Nakataas ang isang kilay niyang seryosong nakatitig siya sa akin. I swallowed hard as we stared at each other for a while. I hardly tried to equal his glares on me.

“Missed me so much to get back your things? Hindi ba iyon naman ang gusto mo?”

Nalilito ko naman siyang tiningnan.

“Y-Yuh, of course. Ibigay mo na sa akin. At saka kelan mo ba ako papakawalan?” I slightly irritatedly asked.

“Here, you can use it. Kaso walang signal dito.” inilahad niya sa akin ang laptop at cellphone ko na nakalagay sa kabilang upuan niya. Hindi ko iyon napansin ah.

How will these things help me to escape here if the signal is not reached? I sighed then took it from him. Hindi na ako umimik pa.

At nang matapaos kaming mag-agahan ay nagtungo ako sa dalampasigan. I was now on the lounger trying to find a signal but there’s nothing.

I was on an island at wala akong makitang malapit na isla kaya malabo talagang magkaroon ng signal rito. And it was their private island. Everything works here because of them.

“How’s your phone? May nahanap ka bang signal? I told you, wala no’n dito.” Ace spoke beside me.

Nakaupo siya malapit sa lounger ko.

“Ace please, I need to go home.”

Nakita ko namang gumalaw ang kaniyang panga. I need to pretend and act like I’m pleading this time. That way I can get his sympathy. I should change my tactic now, to finally get out of here.

“Please, Ace. I will not disturb your family again.” Marahan at malamyos kong ani sa kaniya. Ibang iba sa iritado kong tono kanina.

I stood up at lumapit sa kaniya. Mabilis ko namang naamoy ang mabango niyang amoy. His manly perfume filled my nose. Nakita ko siyang matigilan nang mapansin niyang lumapit ako sa kaniya.

“Ace,”

“Blair, I know what you’re doing. Keep your distance away from me.” mariin niyang sinabi sa akin habang ang mga mata ay nagdidilim na.

Hindi ako nakinig sa kaniya at naupo ako sa bandang gilid ng kinauupuan niya.

He clenched his jaw.

“I miss you… Ace.” pabulong kong sinabi.

Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili ko nang sabihin ko iyon. It feels like I wasn’t pretending and that is what I really felt. Kalaunan ay napaiwas ako ng tingin, hindi makayanan ang paraan niya ng pagtitig sa akin.

“Really? Pero pinagtabuyan mo ako noon,” he said bitterly humid.

Napakunot ang noo ko sa sinabi niya. Hindi naintindihan kung anong ibig sabihin niyon.

“Remember, the day I beg you?” He then told, his voice in deep.

Mabilis naman akong nakaramdam ng isang mabigat na bagay ang dumagan sa aking dibdib nang maintindihan ko siya.

He’s bringing up the past. And that stupid relationship with him that fucked up because he cheated. I was a teenager back then and my decisions were not all right.

I decided so easily without knowing that it can break and tore me apart. I liked him and it’s not enough to put our relationship to the next level.

Because I realize that I didn’t know him enough that much.

“Yes, and I still remember how you lied and pretend to me.” matalim ang mga matang iginawad ko sa kaniya ngayon.

I was planning to pretend and get his sympathy but then it happened. I did the wrong move I guess.

He looked at me coldly. “You never listen to me. I tried to explain but you-”

“Cut it, Ace! Stop bringing up the past. Wala na ’yong nakaraan natin, so stop putting it up!”

Nakaigting ang kaniyang panga na tumingin sa akin. Still cold and stern.

“Guess you are right. There’s is no point to talk about that fucking past.” He then muttered hostily.

Tumayo na ako at saka naglakad paalis.

I don’t know why I feel strange after that. Hindi ko alam mung bakit ang bigat bigat ng loob ko nang maalala ang tungkol sa nakaraan namin.

If you think of it, wala naman talagang magandang nangyari sa past ko kasama siya. Because of him I always got in trouble. Because of him, my life was ruined. Because of him, I lose my parents. And because of him, my heart became stone.

It is burning outside because of the anger that I feel for them but it’s totally freezing inside because of what he did to me.

The past is hard to forget and I can’t force myself to just accept it. In a span of time, nothing change. I’m still hurt and wounded. Bleeding and burning by the living past.

I let out a heavy sigh as my tear rolled down to my cheeks.

My heart hurt about the thought that even he caused a lot of damage in my life, I still want him. To warm the cold heart and to quench the scattered fire in me.

Kabanata 34

Kabanata 34

Truth

Pumasok na ako ng silid ko at hindi na lumabas pa. I can’t take it all. It was all confusing to me. There are so many things that have changed in the past years and I know to myself that all I can feel for him were full hatred now.

Every time I looked at him, hindi pa rin nawawala ang galit na nararamdaman ko sa kaniya at sa kaniyang pamilya. And even now, there’s nothing change. I want to take my revenge on them even I got in trouble by doing those stupid things, just to make them feel how I suffer.

I sat on my bed and let a loud sigh. I put my hair at the back of my ear as I bit my lower lip. Ace is a serious man before I knew him thoroughly. His intimidating air and his powerful words can dictate others. His sports and the job that he wanted to be someday. I knew it all. But one thing is I didn’t know about him. And that is if he loves me before.

Pabagsak kong inihiga ang katawan ko sa kama at matunog na bumuntong-hininga kalaunan.

It is just puppy love I guess, but it seems the opposite. Alam ko sa sarili kong hindi lang pagkagusto ang naramdaman ko para sa kaniya. But I just can’t accept it to myself because of what happened. I can not trust him again and I can’t believe his words.

Napabangon ako sa aking pagkakahiga nang marinig kong may kumatok sa pintuan. And later on, the door open even I haven’t approached it. I left my door unlocked so whoever was knocking outside will have the chance to open it and enter inside.

And I immediately narrowed my eyes when I realized it was Ace who is knocking and now entering inside my room. I then abruptly looked away. Hindi ko siya kayang tingnan sa mga mata. Nararamdaman ko naman ang mga seryosong pagtitig niya sa akin.

“I prepared our dinner, halika na sa dining,” he then said seriously after a while of staring at me.

I assumed that he will still bring up our past once again kaya hindi ko siya nagawang tingnan ng tuwid sa mga mata.

“Hindi pa ako gutom, mauna ka na.” Ani ko na hindi pa rin siya binabalingan ng tingin at saka bumalik uli ng kama at nahiga.

I heard him gasped loudly. I shut my eyes and pretended to be asleep.

“Blair, come on. Get up and go downstairs with me.” ramdam ko ang diin sa kaniyang salita.

Agad namang kumunot ang noo ko. Why is he so demanding?

“I said I’m not hungry, you can eat alone-”

“Britney Clair Cortez,” malalim at malamig ang boses na nitong ani sa pagkakataong ito.

“I said I’m not hungry! Stop being bossy! You are not my father so don’t threaten me with your voice.” I irritatingly said to him. Napadilat ako ng mata at saka matalim siyang tiningnan mula sa pintuan.

His thick black brows meet as his lips were now in a grim line.

“Blair, are we arguing about this? I just want you to eat with me and that’s all-”

“That’s the reason why! I don’t want to dine with you!” I shouted to him. Hinarap ko siya at nakitang natigilan sa sinabi ko.

His eyes were weary and sad as they glance at me. Nag-iwas agad siya ng tingin sa akin pagkaraan.

“Fine, you really don’t want to be with me that bad, huh.” ngumisi pa siya pero walang buhay at panunuya ang mababakas roon.

I looked down. It’s not that I don’t want to be with him. It’s about what I feel for him. Of course, who would want to be with the people who put your life at stake? Who makes you lose everything you have, right? I can’t take to dine with him because of the situation that he makes me remember everything from the past. And it hurts me excruciatingly.

“I understand you, Blair. But…” He probed but then paused.

Napaangat ako sa kaniya ng tingin nang marinig ko siyang magsalita muli. I was now sitting on my bed. While he was now looking at me softly. Nakaramdam naman ako ng kirot sa aking dibdib habang binabanggit niya ang mga salitang iyon. He admits it in a way that will make me feel guilty for accusing them.

“But… I will tell you everything if the right time comes. I won’t let you hate me all your life.” he uttered with his voice in a large deep one. Then he walked towards the door, leaving me now alone inside.

Mabilis naman akong nakahinga ng malalim nang makalabas siya. I want to believe him but it’s just really hard for me. He wants to tell me everything but how could I trust his words when in the first place, he’s the one who ruined my life, my family.

Ipinikit ko ang mga mata ko ng mariin. I can’t understand him. His parents ruined my family and yet he wants to prove me something.

Lumabas ako ng silid nang madilim na ang paligid ng buong bahay. Wala ng masyadong nagbabantay sa labas ng silid ko. I was on my way to go downstairs when I heard a deep noise voice.

Napakurap kurap ako at pinakinggan kung saan nanggagaling ang boses na iyon. Naglakad ako patungo sa kaliwang bahagi kung nasaan ang mga kuwartong bakante na nabuksan ko na noong nakaraang gabi.

“How is the team detective? Tell them to update me every time they find something strange that can help us. Yeah, hindi ko pa alam kung kelan kami makakabalik. I just want to make sure if she is safe bago kami bumalik ng Manila.”

It’s Ace’s voice I was hearing from my place near my room. Medyo mahina ang boses niya pero rinig ko ang bawat sinasabi nito sa kausap niya. I noticed the door was closed but slightly open, kaya naririnig ko ang sinasabi niya mula sa loob. Naglakad ako palapit ron para mas malinawan sa kaniyang mga salita

Wala akong ibang narinig kung hindi siya lang. Does it mean that he is talking over to his phone? But how? Walang signal sa islang ito and I tried so many times to find the spot for the signal that I can get pero wala. So how could he contact someone when there is no signal in here?

“Sigi, salamat. Update me time to time on every record about the case.” Ani pa niya sa isang malalim ngunit baritonong boses.

At nang marinig ko ang mga yabag niyang palapit na sa pintuan ngayon kung saan ako nakikinig ay mabilis na kumalabog ang dibdib ko. So I hurriedly walk away and went towards the railings of the stairs to go downstairs but I heard him shut the door.

Malakas at mabilis ang pintig ng aking puso na napatingin ako sa gawi ng kaniyang pinagmulang silid at nakita kong mariin siyang nakatitig sa akin. I swallowed hard. Sinong kausap niya sa telepono at paano iyon nangyari?

Kaya naman ay unti-unting nanliit ang mga mata kong tumutitig sa kaniya at hindi inalintana ang kabang unti-unti ng naglalaho sa aking dibdib.

“You now hungry?” hindi ko inaasahang tanong niya sa malalim at malaking boses.

I cleared my throat before I uttered.

“Yeah,” ani ko at tinalikuran ko na siya. I have no plans to make conversation with him again so I went downstairs.

Ngunit naramdaman ko nalang sa aking likuran na nakasunod pala siya sa akin hanggang sa marating ko ang kusina. I didn’t mind him and just ignored his presence behind me.

At nang makarating ako sa kitchen ay mabilis na nangunot ang aking noo. Nagugulat kong tiningnan ang countertop at nakita ang steak na hinanda nito para sa akin. Dalawang plato ang nakalagay do’n at mukhang malamig na rin ang pagkain.

Mabilis na nagsalubong ang aking dalawang kilay nang may mapagtanto ako. Hinarap ko naman siya at nakataas ang kilay ko na nagtanong. I crossed my arms.

“Hindi ba at sinabi kong mauna ka nang kumain dahil ayaw kitang makasabay?” bahagyang galit ang tono ng aking pananalita pero hindi pa rin naitago malamyos kong tono.

“But I want to eat with you, and you can’t do anything about it.”

Humakbang siya palapit sa akin at kinain ang kaunting espasyo sa pagitan naming dalawa. He is wearing just his simple white v-neck shirt and his cotton black shorts with his slippers on his feet.

Napatingin ako sa braso niyang hapit ang manggas nito. Halos isang hakbang nalang ang layo namin sa isa’t isa nang huminto siya sa paghakbang.

I looked at his face but my eyes immediately poured onto his luscious lips.

My lips parted as I glanced at it.

“Iinitin ko muna ang mga pagkain dahil lumamig na ito. Just sit here,” he suddenly said.

I snapped out on what I’m thinking when he walked towards the counter. Nilagpasan ako at tinungo ang countertop. Pinapanood ko naman siya sa kaniyang ginagawa. I walked towards his way and sat on the high chair, but when he draws near me. Lean in front of me at the other side of the countertop.

I swallowed hard when I smell his manly scents. Nakapatong ang dalawang braso nito sa lamesa na nasa harap ko ngayon at seryosong nakatitig sa akin.

Napakunot naman ako ng noo at napagtantong hinihintay niya pa muna ang pagkaing iniinit niya. Hindi naman ako nag-iwas ng tingin mula sa kaniyang mga titig. My eyes traced his face as I noticed his changes.

His jaw became more strong and fiercer. His thick brows and lashes and his grey eyes grew darker than before. His proudly pointed nose, his red thin luscious lips. It’s just all become ragged and darker than it was before.

And when my eyes caught him licked his lips then parted them. Napaangat ang tingin ko sa kaniyang mga mata.

“I told you that it’s not good to stare at someone. You can touch me,” he huskily murmured as his eyes gently menaced staring at me.

Malakas naman ang naging pintig ng puso ko. I felt my throat dried.

I wanna touch him like what I once did before. And when I feel the urgency on me to caress his face. I gulped before I lift my hand that will reach his clenching jaw.

And when I finally touch his face. I saw him slowly shut his eyes, accepting my soft hold on him.

“Ace,” mahina at namamaos kong sambit sa kaniyang pangalan habang malakas na kumakalabog ang bawat pintig ng aking puso.

Tinitigan ko ang kaniyang mukha at nakapikit na mga mata na ani mong ninanamnam ang malamyos kong paghawak sa kaniyang pisngi. And when I felt him gasped lightly, my lips parted.

“I’m sorry, Blair. If you just give me another chance to be with you again I will not waste it. I’m not what you were thinking.” nakapikit niyang ani sa malalim at bahagyang namamaos na boses.

I let a sigh. There’s a big rock that pinning down my chest as I heard him say it.

Kaya naman at mabilis kong inalis ang kamay kong nakatangan sa kaniya at agad na nag-iwas ng tingin. I’m not confused about what I’m feeling right now. I’m just scared about my feelings. I’m scared to know the truth that maybe I’m still into him.

Nagbaba ako ng tingin at naramdaman ko namang natigilan siya sa mabilis kong naging pag-iwas. Naramdaman ko namang talikuran niya rin ako kalaunan at hinarap ang mga pagkaing ininit niya kanina.

“Here, kumain na tayo.” ramdam ko ang pagkakaiba ng pananalita niya kumpara sa kanina. It was a bit cold now.

Hindi ko naman siya tinapunan ng tingin at tahimik lang akong kumain. I was in the middle of sipping on my glass when he spoke.

“I’m done, I will just call one of my guards to clean this all when you are done.”

Nagulat naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Halos kakaumpisa pa lang naming kumain at ayaw na niya agad. Hindi nalang ako nagsalita pa at hinayaan nalang siya. Ngunit mabilis naman akong nawalan ng gana pagkaalis niya. I blow out a heavy sigh when I feel that there is something wrong.

Should I talk to him? He seems to regain my trust this past few days at wala akong ibang ginawa kung hindi ang ipag-tabuyan siya. I felt bad about it. Tumayo na ako nang matanaw ko ang isang tauhan niyang tinawag para magligpit ng kinainan namin.

“Ako na dito,” ani ko sa lalaki nang akma niyang kukuhanin ang pinggan sa lamesa.

Natanawan ko naman sa malayo si Ace malapit sa salas na diretso ang mga titig na sa akin nakatutok. Saglit ko rin siyang tinitigan pabalik at saka ako ang unang nag-iwas ng tingin kalaunan.

Nang matapos ako sa kusina ay nagpasiya muna akong pumunta sa tabing dagat. I just want to refresh my mind. I went out and the stars above in the night sky showed on me. Millions of stars and one moon from afar.

I sat on the sand and stared at the sea waves when I got near the shore. Malakas ang simoy ng malamig na hangin na tinatangay ang aking buhok sa likuran.

At nang mapatingin ako sa kanang gilid ko at makitang naroon din si Ace sa malayo, nakatayo at seryosong nakatingin sa kawalan ay mahina akong napabuntong-hininga.

I bit my lower lip afterward when I feel that I should approach him tonight. Tumayo ako at naisipang puntahan siya. Not to say sorry but to talk to him. Hindi naman siya bumaling ng tingin sa aking gawi habang palapit ako ng palapit sa mula sa kaniyang kinatatayuan.

Napakagat labi pa ako nang nasa tabi na niya ako ngayon. I glanced at him and stare at him eventually. He just narrowed his eyes at the sea and didn’t seem to notice my presence beside him now. So I spoke to grabbed his attention.

“Kelan mo ako balak ibalik?” I asked him straightforwardly.

Madilim ang paligid pero nakikita ko ang kaniyang mukha. Ang buwan at ang mga bituin sa kalangitan ang nagsisilbing liwanag sa aming dalawa. Habang ang malakas na hampas ng alon sa dalampasigan ang ani mong naging aming tugtugin sa katahimikang nananaig sa pagitan namin ni Ace.

Nakita ko pang umigting ang kaniyang panga bago siya nagsalita.

“As soon as possible, kung ’yon ang gusto mo.” he bitterly coldly said.

My brows shot up. He will finally send me home? Wait, is that what I want right? Pero bakit parang iba ang naramdaman ko nang sabihin niya iyon. I then looked away nang mapansin kong nakatitig na pala ako sa kaniya kanina pa.

“I want to go back as soon as possible,” I confirmed to him. Even I know to myself that, that is not what I want.

“Excited to go back? Or just too excited to get rid of me.” He then deeply asked.

Napatingin ako sa alon ng dagat matapos niyang sabihin iyon. That is what I want. I want to get rid of him… But something is pulling me out in that thought.

“Yeah,” I said nonchalantly, under my breath.

“Really? Stop showing me this kind of treatment Blair, damn it!” biglang aniya na nagpagulat sa akin.

Hindi makapaniwala akong tumingin sa kaniya. What is he talking about?

He was now glaring at me darkly while his jaw moved recklessly. Humidity and sadness are all I can see in him.

“Ace, is this about the past that you’re bringing up?” I asked, confused.

“Don’t be so dumb, Blair. I know you know what I’m trying to say here.”

Natahimik naman ako. I just held his face earlier. And got neared him to pretend at hindi ko inasahan na ganito na pala iyon. I thought my heart dies a long time ago. But when my hand held him, there was a dazzling ember that lit up something in me.

“Cannot you see it, Blair? All you did was shout your hurtful words to me. You were filled by your anger. Your heart was drowned by the embers you made to yourself.” His thin lips were in a grim line after he states that in a deep painful tone.

Napayuko na ako ng tuluyan sa sinabi niya. It was like I’m backing again on being my old me. Silent and just listening to what others will say about me. I feel like I was a little cat now, scared by this man’s words on me.

Then I think about my anger that I have been feeling for a long time ago. The fire that up until now still hasn’t quenched by anyone. They made me like this. They turn me into this. And being who I am right now wasn’t easy. It feels like I was being burned by myself. Being burned by my own fire of anger.

And I built these flares of anger my own to guard myself, to guard my heart. Because I’m done with being scared of someone that will hurt me again. Scared of trusting that it’s hard to rebuild. Scared by my emotions and feelings that I have always felt when he is around. I am scared to love him like I shouldn’t be. That I believe that I’m already done with.

“Blair, I want you to know that I’m doing my best here just for you to trust me again-”

“But it will never gonna happen again, Ace.” I abruptly cutted him off.

Ang mga mata niyang nakatitig sa akin ngayon na kanina ay nalunod sa dilim ay ngayo’y nangungusap at nagsusumamong pakinggan siya sa pagkakataong ito. Ngunit nang maramdaman kong mag-init ang aking mga mata ay agad akong kumawala sa aming titigan.

“That will happen, Blair…if you will just let me.” naramdaman kong humakbang siya palapit sa akin.

Ang mga mata ko naman ay nananatiling nakatuon pa rin sa baba.

“Just trust me again. That is all I want for now.” Mahina at namamaos ang boses niyang sabi sa akin.

Ang mga mata ko naman ay naramdaman kong may butil na ng luha na umaamba sa pagbagsak. At nang maramdaman kong sakupin ng isang kamay ni Ace ang aking panga at iharap sa kaniya para hulihin ang aking mga tingin. Ngunit bago pa man niya mahuli ang aking mga mata ay mabilis kong pinawi ang luha kong nagbabadya sa pagtulo.

He lifted my chin and caught my eyes. My sight was now weary but I tried to narrow my eyes on him. But when his soft gentle worried eyes locked on mine, I gulped as I feel my heart throbs in ache.

“Please, let me, Blair. Let me regain and rebuild your trust in me that I was once broken.” He said it hoarsely that almost in a breathy whispered one.

Napalunok ako ron. His eyes were glinting at me with pleading and weariness. At nang makitang bumagsak ang tingin niya sa aking mga labi. I do the same.

I saw him damp his luscious lips then parted them eventually. And when my breath began to hitch as my mouth parted in heave, my eyes glance at him in softness.

His weary subtle eyes were focused on my parted lips when I took a glance at him. His hand was still on my cheeks as he now guiding me near to him.

Ang halos ilang pulgada na namamagitan sa amin ngayon ay unti-unti na niyang sinakop ng kaniyang paghakbang. And when his head tilted and slowly nearing on me, I shut my eyes and suddenly felt his soft thin lips crashed into mine.

He slowly kissed me. At first, I was scared but then when I felt his lips moving. I felt mine turn into grim. And when he unstoppably teasing my lips with his subtle moving lips, my in a grim line mouth parted. Accepting his gentle kisses as I began to slowly kiss him back.

I put my hand on his chest as we kissed passionately. Malumanay ang halik niya na sinubukan kong sabayan. I parted my lips to give him more access. Then he slowly sucked on it.

I kissed him back. I felt how soft and gentle his kisses for me. Like it was ensuring and keeping me safe from breaking apart. Like he was so gentle that breaking me in two would break him as well.

I felt his other hand moved at my back. Pulling me near to him. While his other hand gripping my jaw as he kissed me thoroughly.

It was subtle and gentle that I feel the passion into it. But when our kisses became deeper, it feels ecstatic that leads us to something wilder hot kisses.

Bumilis ang kabog ng aking dibdib kasabay ng paghahabol ko sa aking hininga. Napakapit ako ng mahigpit sa kaniyang damit ng maramdaman ang kakaibang kiliti sa sikmura ko.

His kisses were more hungry now. It was like he’s craving for me for a very long time ago. I moaned a bit when I felt him sucked my lower lip. I was catching my breath, panting from the kisses we shared. But I immediately pulled out when I remember what I’m just doing.

Nakita kong idilat niya ang kaniyang mga mata nang maghiwalay ng tuluyan ang aming mga labing sabik na sabik na matikman ang bawat isa. He licked then bit his thin red lips before he looked at me darkly. But then he looked away, after.

“I’m sorry,” he said huskily dim.

Napakagat labi pa muna ako bago nagawang magsalita. “It’s okay, uhm…” hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ko.

“No, I am so sorry. I know that you didn’t trust me enough and I was gaining your belief. But here I am losing my chances by kissing you. I’m sorry.” He muttered in a deep large voice.

Natahimik ako at gano’n din siya. Ilang sandali pa na ang alon muna ang naging saliw sa katahimikang namutawi sa amin. At kalaunan ay napagdesisyonan kong magsalita nang mapansing seryoso at ani mong galit ang dalawang kilay ni Ace na nakatingin sa kawalan ng dagat.

I lifted my glance at him. “I want to trust you again, Ace.” mahinang sabi ko sa kaniya kalaunan.

Nakita ko namang matigilan siya saglit.

“I don’t want you to force yourself, Blair, I told you, I’m willing to wait.”

I looked at his way. His menacing eyes softened when our eyes met.

I smiled a little and nodded my head at him. He then occupies our distance and welcomed me with his sudden embrace.

I froze for a moment.

“I will wait, Blair. I will make you trust me again. I will make you be mine again.” He huskily whispered through my ears.

Slowly, I felt my arms accepting his embrace as the land breeze blown to us. Ilang minuto rin kaming nanatili sa ganoong posisyon bago niya ako inalalayan pabalik ng mansion. Hindi mapangalanang saya at kaginhawaan ng hawak kamay kaming bumalik ng mansion. Nakaalalay siya sa akin nang hinatid niya ako ng aking silid pagkaraan.

No one broke the silence between us as I stood now in front of the door of my room.

“Goodnight,” aniya nang huminto kami sa silid ko.

“Mm, goodnight,” mahina kong sagot pabalik.

Saglit pa muna kaming nagkatitigan bago ako tuluyang tumalikod papasok ng kuwarto. Kakaibang pakiramdam ang naidulot ng halik na iyon sa akin kanina. The moment he held my back and slowly bit my lips. It was all sending me different feelings that I have once felt before.

I blow out a sigh before I lay down in my bed. I want to trust him again. And that is all I wanted to do. To be free in this burden fuel of my fire. Hindi ako sigurado kung tama ba ang ginagawa ko but then I remembered what he just said. And I need to get out of my own fear first before I burned the people around me.

Napakagat labi ako at saka ipinikit ang mga mata para sa pagtulog. This night sends me lots of lightness that made my burdens facile for a while.

Kinabukasan, I was walking down the stairs when I heard Ace’s voice.

“He’s the culprit, matagal ko na siyang pinapaimbestigahan, and now that we had everything, ihanda niyo na ang lahat. We’re going back soon. And make sure that everything was in its place.”

Dahan dahan akong naglakad pababa ng hagdanan pero nakita ako ng isang tauhan ni Ace. Kaya diretso na akong naglakad pababa.

I’m right, he’s talking to someone over the phone. I saw him put down his cellular in his pocket when he noticed my way walking downstairs.

“Morning,” seryoso niyang ani ngunit bakas sa kaniyang mga labi ang tipid nitong pagngiti sa akin.

“Good morning, Ace,” I greeted him back.

Lumapit siya sa akin nang makababa ako. I didn’t expect his sudden move. He held my hand then I looked at him curiously.

He just smirked at me. “Close your eyes, I have a surprise for you.”

Namimilog at pigil ang ngiti kong tumingin sa kaniya habang ang aking noo ay nakakunot dahil hindi makapaniwala sa kaniyang sinabi.

“What is it?” I just asked nonchalantly.

He arched is one brow. “It’s not a surprise anymore baby if I said it to you.” He growled which made me feel that my cheeks reddened.

“Hmm, okay.” I then agree so I close my eyes. Naramdaman ko namang takpan niya ng panyo ang mga mata ko.

“Come here,” malamyos niyang ani sa akin.

“What? I can’t see, tapos pinapalapit mo ako sa’yo?” natatawa kong sabi sa kaniya.

I heard him chuckled too. Then I felt his hand on my waist while his other hand holding my right hand. Inaalalayan ako papunta sa kaniyang surpresa para sa akin.

“Just make sure that you can’t see anything, alright? It’s a surprise so don’t you dare peek with your blindfold.”

Kahit nakatakip ang aking mga mata ay ramdam ko ang ngiti niya. The smile was also plastered on my face, it was contagious.

“Oh gosh, of course, I won’t peek! I want to be surprised as well.” Mahina kong ani sa kaniya.

I just only heard him chuckled softly beside me as he guided me walking somewhere I cannot see.

“You like surprises, huh?” Ani ko pa mayamaya habang patuloy sa paglalakad.

At nang maramdaman ko ang simoy ng hanging dagat. I realized that we are now outside.

“Hmm, what’s make you say that?” He whispered softly in my ears.

Napangiti naman ako niyon. “You surprised me on our first date, how will I forgot it. It was expensive yet so romantic and intimate.” I said as I reminisce that day.

“So you find it intimate,” naramdaman ko ang hininga nito sa aking tainga nang sabihin niya iyon.

We stopped walking. Napangiti naman ako sa sinabi niya.

“Well, yes. I’m impressed by your surprise.” pag-amin ko.

Nakangiti ko namang hinihintay siyang magsalita pero wala akong narinig. Napakunot ang noo ko nang maramdamang nasa tabi ko naman siya ngunit bakit tila natahimik siya.

“Ace?” I called.

Matunog siyang ngumiti kalaunan na nagpatigil sa akin. “I’m happy that you really enjoyed that night.”

Hindi ko maiwasang maramdaman ang lungkot at saya sa kaniyang sinabi. Then I remember myself denying what I really felt that night after my parent’s burial. I told him a lot of hurtful words. Even about that first night, I gave him myself, I denied it all that I was disgusted to it.

“I’m grateful that you have given me another chance.” Slowly, he untied the handkerchief that covers my view. He was now in my back.

“I hope this simple breakfast will also be memorable to you. I make this for us, I hope you like it.” At nang tuluyan na niyang alisin ang tali ng aking piring ay namamanghang pinagmasdan ko ang magandang breakfast na nakahanda para sa amin sa dalampasigan.

Ang gandang pagmasdan ng telang nagbibigay lilim sa amin. It is color white and the bars were black. The table is just enough for both of us. There are two chairs like a gold impressive one.

Our food was perfectly served on our plates. And the drinks were complete, from coffee, juice, water, and wine. My smile grew wider because of that.

I looked at him beside me and the morning sun’s beam hitting his face. Everything became slow as I blinked my eyes and looked at the place that locating the shore and the sunrise was actively happening.

Naramdaman kong hawakan niya ako sa aking baywang at hinarap sa kaniya.

I smiled at him wearily happy. “Thank you, Ace…for this.” malamyos kong ani sa kaniya.

My heart was overwhelmed by all of this. He always does elegant and a bit grandiose surprises but it’s just simple for him. Damn, this man makes my heart beat crazily once again.

He smiled sexily at me then leaned his forehead to mine. Ang lapit ng aming mga mata sa isa’t isa. I feel his breath and his manly fragrance. I then hugged his neck, clinging my hands there at his nape. Inilapit niya ang kaniyang mga labi sa akin at marahang dinampian ng tipid na halik, habang ang kaniyang kamay sa aking likuran ay marahan akong hinahapit palapit pa lalo sa kaniya.

It was fast and soft. It’s a swift kiss. Nanunudyo naman niya akong tiningnan pagkatapos niyang ilayo sa akin ang kaniyang mga labi.

Napanguso naman ako sa ginawa niya. Then he chuckled sexily. My lips pouted more but I fold when he kissed me thoroughly in a sudden that I didn’t expect.

Mas hinigpitan ko ang kapit sa kaniyang leeg sa pagkakataong ito. He held my waist that pulling me more towards him. I parted my lips and I moaned a bit when I felt him bit my lower.

Nalalasing at naliliyo ako sa kaniyang mga halik. I feel the butterfly inside my stomach flying. His kisses were subtle and slightly erotic.

But then he stopped and stared at me for a while. His grey eyes were hooded. He licked his lips then held me towards the table he prepared for us.

I swallowed hard when I felt my throat dried. He also cleared his throat before he took a glance at me. Nakaupo na kami ngayon at namamangha kong pinagmasdan ang mga pagkaing hinanda niya.

“Let’s eat,” he said while his lips were curved which made me plaster a smile on mine as well.

Napaiwas ako ng tingin sa kaniya at saka tinanaw ang paligid. Ang ganda ng tanawin at masaya kaming kumain ng sabay. The morning was ecstatic and our lunch us well.

Ace was so immaculately handsome as he cooked our lunch. I still can’t believe that I’m here right now with him. Happy and the hatred were not felt.

“So, how’s your work with Alvaro?” he asked me in the middle of our lunch.

“Maayos naman, he’s a nice boss and he treated me good.” Nakangiting sagot ko sa kaniya.

I saw his eyes darkened while he stared in his glass and it became soft when he found my eyes.

“That’s good to hear,”

Pareho kaming napatingin sa tauhan niya nang lumapit ito sa amin.

“Pasensiya na boss, sa tingin ko ay kailangan niyo nang sagutin itong tawag.” inabot nito kay Ace ang cellphone na hawak niya.

I smirked at Ace irritatingly. Nakataas naman ang dalawang kilay nitong tumingin sa akin.

“How does that happen? You said there is no signal here and now someone is calling you?”

Bahagyang umawang ang labi niya, “We tricked your phone,”

Napakunot naman ang noo ko sa sinabi niya. This brute! Nakatingin pa rin siya sa akin, ani mong naghihintay ng sasabihin ko.

“Will I answer the call?” he then asked like he’s waiting for my approval about it.

“Yeah, sagutin mo at baka importante.” Tumango siya sa akin bago tinanggap ang tawag.

He was just standing near our table so I can hear what he was talking about.

“I will tell her. But I don’t want her to pressure. Just get everything ready and do not let him escape.”

Napatingin ako sa kaniya. He dropped the call and walk towards the table near me. He looked so serious when he got back. Who is he talking with? I do not want to ask because I don’t want to interfere.

“Halika at pumunta muna tayo sa mga sun loungers, I have something important to tell you.” He said then stood up.

Bahagya pa siyang ngumiti at iniabot ang kaniyang kamay sa akin. I didn’t smile back. My mind was preoccupied with what he was going to tell me.

Nakaupo ako ngayon sa kaniyang harapan. We’re now here near the shore sitting in one sunlounger with him. Isinandal niya ang ulo ko sa kaniyang dibdib. Nakatalikod ako sa kaniya at hindi siya nakikita. Pareho naming tanaw ang dagat habang ang kamay niya ay malamyos na hinahaplos ang aking braso.

“Your family is my family too, Blair. I’m thankful to meet the people like your parents. They are just so good and caring parents.” he started.

Lungkot at pait naman ng nakaraan ang namayani sa aking puso nang marinig iyon sa kaniya. Every time I remembered what happened to them back then, I feel the anger that is still flaming in my heart.

Hanggang ngayon ay wala pa ring hustisya at ’yon ang masakit at nagbibigay sa akin ng baga na mas lalong mag-apoy at magliyab.

“My parents didn’t plan everything-”

“Ace, please tell me the truth. Stop covering up your parents.” hindi ko naiwasang sumikdo ang poot sa aking pananalita.

I heard him sighed heavily. He then reaches for my hand and intertwined our fingers. Hinawakan niya iyon ng mahigpit.

“My family is innocent Blair and I’m not covering them. This is not between your family and mine.”

Naninikip ang dibdib ko at nagbabadya na ang mga luhang tumulo mula sa aking mata. I know that he only wants to protect his family. He wants to clean his family name on me by saying that it wasn’t their fault.

I was about to stand up but he tightened his grip on my hand as he hugged me from behind. Not letting me go when he felt that I was about to move out away from him.

“We are not responsible about what happened before, Blair. It was the Fuentes.” he huskily said.

Pakiramdam ko ay may tumutusok sa puso ko nang sabihin niya iyon. No, it was his family. He’s just covering up his parent’s evilness.

My chest tightened and I was now panting in disbelief. He was just hiding the truth from me.

“I don’t believe you-”

“It was the truth, Blair…trust me, baby, please.”

“No, Ace! H-How? Tell me please…” Ang luhang namuo sa aking mga mata ay ngayo’y nag-uunahan na sa pagbuhos sa aking pisngi.

How could this all happen? Over the years I have lived in my hatred of the Ventura. I tried to ruin them for how many times. And now he’s saying that it’s not them?

He just hugged me tightly. Hinawakan niya ang aking ulo at saka isinandal muli sa kaniyang dibdib. Sinubukan ko siyang harapin at saka matalim siyang tiningnan.

“Please Ace, tell me the truth! Don’t tell me this lies-”

“It’s not my family, Blair. Senator Fuentes was the man behind it all. He’s the one who killed your parents.” mahina at animong nagdadalawang isip niya pang binaggit ang huling dalawang salita niyang binitiwan.

Laglag ang panga kong tumingin sa kaniya. Habang walang hinto sa pag-agos ang mga luha ko sa aking pisngi. Hindi makapaniwala sa kaniyang mga sinabi.

“I’m sorry baby. I’m sorry if I came that late that I haven’t saved your parent’s lives. I’m sorry for seeing you at your lowest point and I can’t do anything for you. I’m sorry, Blair…” he said in his low deep husky voice as he reached for my arms.

I looked at him straight in the eyes. I shook my head.

Tell me that it was the truth. I’m relieved to know that his family didn’t do it. But sadness and guilt crept on me. Pinagbuntungan ko ng galit ang mga taong wala naman palang ginawang masama sa mga magulang ko.

Nahihiya at walang mukha akong maihaharap kay Ace nang bumaling ako sa kaniya.

Ace… I should be the one who apologizes to you. I don’t deserve your sorry’s, Ace… I don’t deserve it.

Kabanata 35

Kabanata 35

Love

I blow out a breath, releasing the guilt that buggering me. It’s a new day and I’m still in my bed.

Hindi ko kayang harapin si Ace ngayon. After all that happened. I already hurt him and destroy his family. I was at the edge of my anger that I almost ruined their hotel.

It didn’t happen because Ace caught me. I felt so guilty about it all that happened. Then I remembered Manang Soling’s words. She’s right, the Ventura’s are innocent. They didn’t manipulate us, they even helped us and here I am suspecting them for the death of my parents. All my life was full of anger and hatred for them, but it was all useless. I hated the people who are innocent. I’m dragging the people who is helping me.

Napatingin ako sa pinto nang marinig kong may kumakatok do’n. Mag-iiwas na sana ako ng tingin nang makitang si Ace iyon. I smell his aftershave and fresh mint scents as he entered my room. I tame my hair because I just woke up.

“Good morning,” papalapit na aniya.

Hindi ako nagsalita at saka bumangon na ng higaan at tinungo ang bathroom. Iniwasan ko siya at hindi binalingan ng tingin.

At nang makapasok ako ng bathroom ay si Ace lang ang laman ng isip ko habang bumubuhos ang tubig mula sa shower. He showed me care and affection at the same time. And all I gave was hatred and foul words that will hurt him.

Wala akong basehan kung totoo nga ba ang kaniyang mga sinabi sa akin kahapon. But the evidence is not what I need.

I went out of the bathroom and I saw Ace sitting on the couch near my bed. Looking at me worriedly.

Mabilis naman akong nag-iwas ng tingin. Then I felt him walking towards me.

“I’m sorry if I didn’t tell you it before. I investigated him and it turns that we’re right. Gusto mo na bang umuwi ngayon? We’ll go if you want it now.” He then said behind me.

Hindi ako nagsalita at nananatili lang ang aking tingin sa ibaba.

“Ipapahanda ko na ang helicopter-”

“Don’t… I want to stay here for a while. Kahit mga ilang araw lang. Just give me some time, please.” nangungusap ang mga mata kong ngayon ay nakatingin na sa kaniya.

Nababasa ko sa kaniyang mga mata na nag-aalala siya para sa akin. Why would this man cared for me. And I hate myself for seeing him being like this. I hurt him and he still doing this. He insisted and save me from danger. When all I did was to find a way in taking my revenge.

Diretsong nakatingin lang siya sa akin, na para bang pinag-aaralan ang reaksiyon ko at naninimbang.

“Ace, hindi ko alam kung tama pa bang ipagpatuloy natin ito.” I didn’t blink while I said it straight into his eyes.

Agad namang nangunot ang kilay niya. Nagtagis ang bagang at mataman akong tinitigan.

“We talked about it next time, not now Blair.” he sternly uttered.

“Ace, can’t you see? I don’t deserve you!”

Napailing-iling niya naman akong tiningnan. Seryoso at mariin ang mga matang nakatutok sa akin.

“No one deserves me except you.” He then muttered hostily.

“No Ace, you didn’t understand me-”

Hinawakan niya ang aking siko at mabilis akong hinalikan. I tried to shut my mouth but I failed. I want his kisses. Damn, I really like it so much.

“Then make me understand it, tell me Blair. I lose you once at ayaw ko na ’yong maulit pa. You gave me another chance, so please don’t take it back.” He said in almost a whisper.

Magkadikit ang noo naming dalawa habang ang kaniyang mga labing sinasakop ang aking bibig kanina ay ngayo’y nakapirmi na. Mabigat ang naging bawat paghinga at ani mong nahihirapan sa sitwasyong ibinibigay ko sa kaniya.

My arms were on his nape while his hands were on my waist. Magkadikit ang katawan naming dalawa at ramdam ko ang malakas na pagkabog ng puso ko.

I let a heavy sighed before I looked at him straight in the eye.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry Ace. S-Sorry,” my voice broke as I felt my tears suddenly crawled down my cheeks.

I then felt him caressed my hair until I stop from crying on his chest. He was brushing my back as he comforted me with his welcoming embrace. Nanginginig ang labi ko sa paghikbi habang nakaupo ako sa kaniyang mga hita ngayon. Naupo siya sa aking kama at inalalayan akong umupo sa kaniyang hita.

He parted his legs then he put me down on his right thigh as he cornered my legs with his left one. I’m like a little girl in his arms, crying on his chest while I’m sitting on his thigh.

“I’m sorry for hurting you and your family. Ako ang nanira ng buhay at hindi kayo. I’m sorry for my rudeness. I’m sorry Ace, I-I’m so sorry.” ani ko na kasabay ng mabibigat kong paghikbi.

“Hush, it’s okay Blair. I understand you.”

“W-Why you always understand me even I am so complicated?”

“You are not complicated baby, fate is the complex.” He then said huskily.

How can he say it? For someone like me who caused a lot of damage on him. I don’t deserve his kindness.

“Come on, stop crying. Let’s make it work, okay?” He then wiped the tears in my cheeks.

“But I have done horrible things on you and in your family, Ace. I can’t seem to-”

“Baby, no. Hear me, okay? I understand why you did that. And I already forgive you for doing it. So please, don’t be so harsh to yourself. I know how much you wanted us to be. Just let us once again, please. Huwag mo nang isipin pa yung nakaraan. I want to make you happy. I want us to be happy together without the traumatizing agony you’ve experienced.” He said while his eyes directly on me. Subtle and extremely mellow.

I then just nod my head at him while his fingers drying the tears on my cheeks.

Bumaba na kami ng hagdan pagkaraan at nagtungo ng kitchen. Then he handed me a glass of water. I don’t know if I can make it work with him. Giving him another chance was happiness for me. But now that this all happened, hindi ko na maintindihan.

I felt the gap between us. I feel like I don’t deserve him. But he always makes me feel that it’s only me. It’s funny that after all that happened one thing is never changed. That I still liked him, I may be denied it a long time ago. But the affection I feel for him that buried by my anger never dies.

The wind here outside was blowing wildly. I tied my hair and looked at the sea. Tirik na ang araw at nandito ako ngayon sa mga sunloungers. Nakaupo… mag-isa. Dahil gusto ko munang mag-isip isip kung ano ba ang dapat kong gawin. Kung ano ba ang tama at mali na dapat kong baguhin lalo na at alam kong hindi ko na kailan pa maitatama ang mga pagkakamaling nagawa ko ng dahil sa galit.

Then I heard someone groaned from my back. Napalingon ako sa likuran ko at nakita ko si Ace na nakatayo ro’n.

“Why are we doing this, Ace? Muntikan na akong makasakit ng ibang tao pero pinipili mo pa ring ituloy natin ito.” Tanong ko sa kaniya at saka nag-iwas ng tingin kalaunan.

Lumapit siya sa akin at hinawakan ang aking baba. Hinuli niya ang aking mga tingin. Nakaupo ako habang siya ay nananatiling nakatayo sa aking harapan.

“You’re doubting me,”

“Maybe our past relationship was only puppy love. I was young and I decided quickly without thinking.” I then muttered.

I saw how his eyes became cold. He gritted his jaw. His hand held my jaw and caressed my cheeks.

Malungkot ang mga mata kong nakatingin sa kaniya ngayon.

“You’re saying that you said ’yes to me before because you’re pressured to me? Or you haven’t any choice so you decided hesitantly.” He said darkly.

I looked away. “Y-Yes, I mean maybe.” napaiwsas siya ng tingin at nakita kong magtangis ang kaniyang bagang.

“So my efforts before was nonsense for you. And that night, you were really that disgusted by my kisses.”

Natigilan naman ako sa kaniyang sinabi. Alam kong hindi pa rin niya nakakalimutan ang mga sinabi ko sa kaniya nang araw na iyon. And I know to myself that it was all just a lie. That I was just drowned and filled with anger that I need to say that on him.

Hindi na siya nagsalita pa at kalaunan ay binitiwan ang pagkakahawak sa aking mukha. Iniwan niya akong nakatanaw na sa kaniyang likuran na papalayo na sa akin. Hindi ako sigurado kung tama ba itong ginagawa ko. I want him to unlike me by hurting him. And hurting him was like hurting myself.

We’re not meant for each other. I want him to stay away from me. I don’t want him to get hurt by me again.

Before I was hurt, badly hurt. Because I was blinded by the truth. I was surrounded by my own fire that I almost burned him on my own.

His family, what will they gonna say if they found out that I’m his girlfriend and the person behind of the scandal of their OV Hotel is the same person. A one-person that once almost ruined and killed their lives if their son, Ace won’t just catch me in the act.

I concluded it all, if ever that we are gonna be end up together. That his parents might hate me for what I did to them. And this thought is kinda hard for me. Leaving and hurting Ace for his safety is what I think is my last option. Getting away from him is what is best to do for not causing him troubles.

I just realized that it’s not him who hurts me before. It’s us and fate that destroyed our relationship. It’s the test for both of us but unfortunately, we failed, I failed him.

Naglalakad ako sa loob ng aking kuwarto, hawak hawak ang cellphone ko. I’m trying to find a signal pero wala talaga. Inilapag ko na ito at naupo sa couch. Napahawak ako sa aking sentido nang maramdamang sumasakit ang aking ulo. Kaya sumandal ako at mariing ipinikit ang aking mga mata.

Hindi ko nalamalayang nakatulog na pala ako at nagising nalang ako nang maraadamang may malamig na bagay na pumupunas sa aking noo.

I blinked and saw Ace. He was sitting beside me on my bed. Inilapit nito ang upuan malapit sa akin. Nakita ko sa side table ang dala nitong pagkain.

Bumangon ako at naupo. “What are you doing here?” 

“You’re sick,” tipid niyang sinabi sa seryoso at malamig na tono.

Bakas pa rin ang pag-iwas sa boses niya. “I’m fine, you can go.”

“You enjoyed hustling me away, huh?” he coldly muttered to me now.

I gulped. He’s mad and he’s annoyed because of me. Namimilosopo siya at alam kong nasaktan ko siya. Gustong gusto ko siyang makasama pero hindi iyon ang nakikita kong paraan.

“Yeah,” I said in almost a whisper.

His lips were in a grim line. The light in my room was off but I can see his face clearly because of the lamp beside us. Tumayo siya at akala ko ay aalis na, he turned on the lights at bumalik ulit sa pwesto niya.

Napakurap kurap pa muna ako, adjusting my sight by the sudden light that struck me.

“Kumain ka na,” aniya habang hawak ang isang mangkok nang sopas na mukhang bagong luto lang.

Akmang susubuan niya ako nang bigla kong inagaw sa kaniya ang kutsara.

“I can do it myself,” I abruptly retorted.

Pero hindi niya hinayaang makuha ko sa kaniya iyon. Matalim kaming nagtitigan ng ilang sandali at kalaunan ay wala akong nagawa kung hindi ang ibuka ng aking bibig. Nakakailang subo na ako at pakiramdam ko ay binubusog na ako niyon.

“Ayoko na,” inilapag na nito sa tray ang mangkok niyang hawak.

Aalis na sana siya nang bigla ko siyang tawagin. Tumingin siya sa akin, wala pa ring ekspresyon ang mga mata.

“Thank you,” ani ko at tinalikuran lang niya ako.

Malungkot akong napabuntong-hininga. Ilang sandali pa ay bumalik siyang muli at may dalang isang baso ng tubig at isang tableta ng gamot na mukhang ipapainom niya sa akin.

“Drink this,” he then gave me the medicine and made me drink the water as he handed the glass to me.

Madaling araw na at nagising ako dahil sa sobrang lamig. Nanginginig ako at hindi sapat ang kumot na nagbibigay init sa akin.

Ngunit nang maramdaman kong may mainit na pakiramdam ang yumayakap sa akin ay mabilis ko iyong binalingan ng tingin.

It was a warm body. And when I saw Ace’s arms hugging me while his eyes shut beside me, I then felt my heart flinched.

This man was so caring and a very warming person that makes my heart softened. Even how much I hurt him, he was still here to take care of me. To help me find if who’s the people inflicted my life into agony.

Kinabukasan, nagising nalang ako na magaan ang pakiramdam. I felt light and good after I got sick last night. Hindi ko rin alam na sakit na pala ang inabot ko dahil nananakit lang naman ang aking ulo ng pananghaliang iyon.

At nang maramdaman kong may mabigat na nakapatong sa aking katawan nang aakma ako sa pagtayo. Napatingin ako sa brasong nakadagan sa aking tiyan. I blinked twice to check if it’s real and not an illusion. The familiar veins in his arms.

Ramdam ko rin ang hininga niya sa aking tainga. Gumalaw ako ng bahagya para harapin siya. Dahan dahan akong tumagilid para hindi ko siya magising. He’s still sleeping.

Kahit nakapikit ang kaniyang mga mata ay seryoso pa rin ang kaniyang mukha. Ang masungit at seryoso niyang ekspresyon ay hindi nagbabago na mas lalong nagbigay ng kakaibang pakiramdam sa akin.

I then lift my hand to caress his cheek. I traced his thick brows with my finger and his proud nose and lashes. Then later on my eyes drifted down at his thin lips.

His lips that I kissed several times. Napahawak ako sa kaniyang braso nang mapansing iba na ang aking naiisip.

And when I saw him licked his lower lip. I get alarmed.

“Morning,” his deep husky voice in the morning greeted me.

Nagugulat akong napatingin sa kaniya. Kinapa niya ang aking noo at ang abo niyang mata ay nasa akin na ngayon ang tuon. Bahagya siyang ngumiti pero agad ring nawala.

This is the first time I woke up in the morning with him in the same bed. And it’s because I’m sick.

Hinawi niya ang buhok ko at ikinawit sa likuran ng aking tainga.

“Trust me again Blair,” mahinang naging sambit niya. Seryoso na at animong nangungusap.

I looked at his lips. I swallowed hard. Ang kamay ko ay nananatili pa ring nasa kaniyang mga braso.

“Ace, I’m scared. I don’t want to hurt you again.”

“Do you think that you are not hurting me by what you are doing?”

I looked at him now in the eyes. I know that this is the only way and it’s hurting me too.

“Pero Ace-”

“No buts, please consider my feelings as well, Blair.”

I bit my lower lip before I speak. “I feel like I’m the hindrance of your happiness. You always got hurt just because of me.” I pronounced weakly.

“I can take all the pain, as long as you are the reason, baby. I will endure it.” He huskily said as his gloomy eyes glinting in hope.

Malakas ang naging pintig ng puso ko habang nakatitig kami sa isa’t isa.

“But-” he shut me again but this time, by kissing my lips until it dawned by his.

I didn’t part my lips. Then I immediately slipped away from his lips. Magkasalubong naman ang dalawang makapal niyang kilay na tumingin sa akin.

Napaiwas naman ako ng tingin sa kaniya. I felt my cheeks flush.

“I just woke up, hindi pa ako nakakapagsipilyo.” nahihiyang ani ko.

That made his lips tugged up.

“Parehas lang tayo,” kagat labi akong bumangon mula sa pagkakapatong sa kaniyang dibdib at nagmamadaling pumasok ng bathroom.

Nakita ko pa siyang umiiling iling bago ako makatayo. Ngunit pagbalik ko sa kama ay wala na si Ace ro’n. Then I smiled as I think of my decision. I want to be with him. And I guess that giving him a chance wasn’t that big deal anymore because he deserves it. And to think, he doesn’t need it.

At nang pababa na ako ng hagdan ay agad na siya ang hinanap ng aking mga mata. Tinungo ko ang kusina dahil alam kong do’n lang siya posible na magtungo. Ngunit napahinto ako sa paglalakad nang marinig ko siyang magsalita. He was in the kitchen near the countertop. Nakatalikod siya sa akin kaya hindi niya ako nakikita.

“Mama no, let me handle this. As soon as I can when I get back, let me do this for her. I want her and I hope you can respect my decision.”

Hindi ko man alam kung saan patungkol ang pinag-uusapan nila pero alam kong ako ang tinutukoy ni Ace.

Ibinaba na nito ang telepono pagkaraan. At saka ako muli nagpatuloy na maglakad patungo sa kaniyang likuran.

“What happened?” Agad kong tanong sa kaniya.

He turned on me and I saw how his eyes widen a fraction. I pursed my lips. He blinked then darken his eyes that directly focusing on me.

“I want you back Blair… and no one can stop me.”

Para naman akong tumakbo ng matagal dahil sa bilis ng kabig ng dibdib ko nang sabihin niya iyon. I made my decision and I’m sure about this. I trust him and I won’t let him get hurt because of my mistakes.

Sa ilang araw kong narito sa isla na kasama siya ay masasabi kong iba’t ibang pakiramdam ang naramdaman ko. At first, I was hesitant and denial about what I feel. But now I will not… deny it anymore.

His eyes darted at me. It was like waiting for my answers. Waiting for me to go back to him again. I blinked and stared at his lips then up to his dim eyes.

“I want it also to happen Ace,” I said in almost a whisper.

I saw his jaw move a bit then lowered his head to capture my lips. It was sudden but I kissed him back, passionate and accepting his embrace.

Nakahawak ang dalawa niyang kamay sa aking likuran at baywang. Slowly, became like a wild vast of waves, our kisses became deeper. I tilted my head and kissed him thoroughly.

I ruck my feet ang clung my arms on his nape. I held his hair and caressed it and disheveled it.

At nang bumitaw siya at tumingin sa akin ng diretso. His eyes hooded with carnal and erotic desire. He bites his lips and pulled me closer to him more this time.

“Is that true? Or you are just pressured and unhesitatingly answered my question,” he whispered at my ears.

I felt his hot breath at my neck. And it sends shivers down my spine as I feel him breathe there. My eyes shut automatically when I feel his soft lips touched my neck teasingly. He dabs soft kisses on it that made me groan into something.

My breathe heave and I bit my lips as he planted soft kisses on my neck. Naliliyo ako sa kaniyang mga halik sa aking leeg.

I tilt my neck to give him more access. “I-I’m not pressured Ace,” nanginginig ang boses kong sinabi.

Patuloy pa rin siya sa pagdampi ng kaniyang mga halik. Mula sa leeg paakyat sa aking panga. I moved my face to the other side. Mabilis ang paghinga ko habang nararamdamang may kumikiliti sa aking sikmura.

“You sure? You want me back?” he asked me sexily. It was like a husky and a deep voice that I have never heard from him.

Hindi ko na napigilin pang kumawala ang halinghing sa aking mga labi.

“Y-Yeah A-Ace, I want y-you.” Nahihirapan kong sinabi.

I grip his shirt when he kissed me on my lips now. He sucked my lower mouth and entered his tongue inside my mouth unguarded.

Mabilis ang aming naging paghinga habang habol habol namin ang isa’t isang mga labi. Then I felt his hand crawling to my buttocks. Nakagat ko ang kaniyang pang-ibabang labi ng pisilin niya ako do’n.

I moaned when his kisses lowered. He kissed my neck. And I felt high when his hands neared to my mounds.

“I want you back Blair. I waited for you for so long.” He said in between his hot wet kisses on my neck.

Naramdaman ko pang inangat niya ang aking pang-upo. Binuhat niya ako at saka patuloy na hinalihalikan. He was carrying me towards the stairs but I felt something behind me I paused.

Naramdaman kong isinandal niya ako sa isang malamig na pader. He sucked my tounge and I moaned a bit. The soft kisses were short-lived, dahil habang tumatagal mas umiinit at nagiging malalim ang kaniyang mga halik sa akin.

I kissed him back, equalling the intensity of his ragged kisses. I sucked his tongue softly and bit his lower lip as well. He groaned and kissed me more. We’re kissing hungrily like we’re starving and waited for this time to come.

Naramdaman kong paakyat kami ng hagdan ngayon. “Ace,” I called.

Mabilis niyang nabuksan ang pinto ng kuwarto. Hindi ko na alam kung aling silid ang aming pinasukan. He kissed me again as he laid me down on his bed.

His hand moves down to my chest. Mapaghanap itong gumapang papasok sa loob ng aking damit. And when I felt his fingers touched the tip of my mound and I immediately let a soft moan. His fingers slid inside my brasier in an instant.

He kissed me and bit my lower lip harshly again. Then our tongues fought in their own battle as I felt him striking me unguarded. I bit his lip as well. Malayang nakakapit ang aking mga kamay sa kaniyang likuran.

His other hand moves to my other boob to give it the same attention. Bumaba ang kaniyang halik sa aking leeg. I arched my backed when I felt the tingling sensation that I feel as he softly rubs his fingers at the tip of my boob.

Slowly, his hand lowered at my abdomen. Tracing and making a line until it reach the hem of my dress. He pulled it up exposing my body, my wealthy breast, and its hardened peaks, wearing just my undies.

I saw how his eyes glared and feasted at my body with carnal erotic desire. He then goes back to kissing me again and in a sudden, I felt him unclasped my bra then remove it afterward.

He kissed my neck down to my healthy breast. I felt his hot mouth dropped to my hardened peaks while his other hand is paying attention to my other boob.

I shut my eyes. I was lost by his kisses. I moaned when I felt the tingling sensation as he sucked my tip. Napahalinghing ako sa kakaibang sensasyong dinudulot ng kaniyang mainit na bibig sa aking dibdib.

He then kissed my other boob and he did the same to the other one. Napaliyad akong muli nang maramdamang may kumikiliti sa aking sikmura. His hot mouth giving me a tingling sensation.

Nakapikit ang aking mga mata, hirap idilat dahil sa kiliting dulot ng kaniyang mga halik. My mind is spinning that I couldn’t open my eyes. Until I felt him kissed my abdomen down to my sensitive clit. And my panty was still on.

He kissed me down there without removing the thin cloth that only covers me. I moaned hard. I can’t stop myself anymore. It’s too much to take. I was catching my breath when I looked at him and saw him slowly removing the thin cloth using his teeth.

It was so hot to see him down on me and I was panting as I watched him doing it. He looked at me with desire and passion.

At nang tuluyan niya iyong mahila pababa sa aking mga binti ay napatingala ako nang dampian niya ng halik ang aking maselang hiyas. I moaned and bit my lower lip to stop myself from making noise.

“Fuck, you’re dripping wet baby,” he whispered darkly.

Uminit ang pisngi ko sa sinabi niya. Damn man, he’s making me wetter when he said that.

He kissed me and sucked me down there using his hot mouth pro. Nakaarko ang aking likod, naliliyo sa sarap na dulot ng ginagawa niya sa akin. Ibinaling ko ang aking ulo sa kabila ng maramdaman kong may nag-uumpisa ng mamuo sa aking kaibuturan.

I felt his thick sharp tongue swirling on my sensitive clit that makes me want to shut my thighs and locked him on there. And when his sword-like tongue became sharper and fasten his sliced on my folds, I held his head and pulled him more on me.

“Ohh, Ace…” I moaned his name like I was chanting it eventually.

And when I felt my near, he paused. Habol ko ang aking hininga at namumungay ang mga mata kong tiningnan siya. Ipinailalim niya kong muli sa kaniya. Then I saw him quickly removed his shirt making him now topless.

His eyes pierced on me darkly and slowly I just suddenly felt his finger touched my sensitive slit. He massaged my clit with his thumb, teasing my entrance so bad. He kissed my neck as I felt his finger slowly entering me. I felt a bit hurt but it was blissful. I moaned then he kissed me replacing the moans I make.

He slowly rocked his finger inside of me. Then later on he entered another digit. I was carried away by his kisses. I moaned and bit his lips as I felt his fingers hammering my clitoris.

He fastens his pace and I was starting to lose my sanity. He gripped my other breast as he rocked his finger inside me. He licked, kissed, and bit my skin as I felt something building in my stomach. I was on the edge when he stopped again!

He kneeled on the floor almost praising me now. My hooded eyes widen a fraction when I saw him kneeled on me down there. His tongue replacing his fingers this time.

It’s the tingling sensation that is now building by his sharp tongue. He twirls and twisted his tongue like it was his delightful meal. Napakapit ako sa bedsheet ng mahigpit at hindi malaman kung saan ibabaling ang aking ulo sa kakaibang sarap na ibinibigay ng kaniyang mainit na bibig at matalas na dila.

I felt something is started to build up inside my stomach once again as he moves his tongue faster than it’s usual and rocked his fingers on me doubling its pace.

“A-Ace, ohhh, ahh…” Halinghing ko sa sobrang pagkakaliyo at sa nararamdaman kong kakaibang lalabas sa kaibuturan ko.

And in a desperate, long moan, my orgasm exploded. He continued kissing and licking me there as my juices spurt on him. Unti unting bumagal ang paghinga ko at mabilis rin na nagbago nang itukod niya ang magkabila niyang kamay sa aking gilid.

He kissed me again. I touched his chiseled chest then traced his abs down to his belt. He groaned softly when I touched his erect manhood bulging inside his pants. I removed his belt but it was hard to do while I’m kissing him back. So he stopped and removed his belt himself. I then pulled him and help him unbuttoned his pants as we shared the kisses when he finally throws the stubborn belt on the floor.

At nang mabuksan ko ang kaniyang pantalon at maibaba niya iyon. I felt his erect manhood poking to my entrance. He was still wearing his boxer brief but his huge bulge making me gulped hard as I felt it rubbed against my clitoris. I moaned when I grind my body to him and feel him more against me.

Ace groaned. “Naughty, Blair,” he whispered on my ears seductively husky.

“Ace…” I said his name like I was begging to him. Na para bang alam na niya ang gusto kong mangyari.

His eyes grew darker as it bore on me. “It will hurt you, baby.”

It was frustrating talking to him as he kissed my neck and poking my entrance at the same time.

“Please… Ace. You hurt me once before. I’m so sure that you won’t hurt me this time again.” I said womanly breathy.

Humiwalay siya mula sa paghalik sa aking katawan at nakita kong ilabas ang kaniyang nag-uumigting na kahabaan. And then my eyes widen when his manhood sprang free. I gulped when I saw it. It was massively long and fully erect.

He looked at me with his eyes dark that filled with the passion of desires. And later on, he crouched and kissed me hard as I felt his manhood brushing against my sensitive clit. His member twitching in my entrance.

“Ohhh,” I moaned as he slowly entered his long tool inside my folds.

Napaungol ako sa sakit na mabilis na napalitan ng kakaibang sarap. Agad namn niyang hinanap ang aking mga labi at saka ako hinalikan.

He pushed himself slowly and I felt the longing filling of his manhood on my sensitive folds. He was penetrating me with his huge sword that making me lost everything inside my head.

I bit my lip hardly and scratch his back because of the pain of bliss. Hindi na siya gumalaw at patuloy lang akong hinalikan.

It was hurt at first maybe because of his massiveness that I can’t bear inside me in so much huge. But as he moved his hips slowly, it became a pleasure. The sensation he made on me that I once felt before.

“Fuck, I missed you, baby. I’m longing for you in so many years.” He huskily whispered as he slowly moved inside me.

He kissed and sucked my earlobes but he couldn’t stop himself from his groans. He went rougher and stronger as the seconds passed by. I moved my hips as well and thrust with him in unison as our skin bumping against each other that making a loud noise like it was clapping of friction.

Then afterward, I felt something familiar inside my stomach is building up. And I can’t stop myself anymore. I am really lost by his pleasure and passionate kisses.

He gripped my waist, his body hammering me now. The bed was making creaks to the walls as he went through inside me, roughly and hardly.

“Ace, ahh, oh god. Ace… Ohh,” I moaned as I felt the building sensation was beginning to explode.

I moaned profusely and I was now hanging at the edge. He moved faster and pounding me like there is no yesterday until I reached my peak.

“Ahhhh,” I moaned so loud as I felt my insides twist and turn after a long pulsating release.

He continued moving until I gasped when I felt his seeds inside my wounds. I felt my clit was dripping wet as we both reached our climaxes.

“Fuck, ahh. I want you, Blair. I want you more.” I heard him whispered to my ears as we both caught our lost air from doing the unstoppable beat of our body movements.

“I love you… I love you, Blair.” Then later on he added in a husky voice.

We’re both catching our breath. I was tired and I felt so weak. But hearing him say those three words. I can’t believe on what he just said. I just can’t expect him to say this to me. Before I was the first who admits my feelings for him and now he is saying the word that I’ve waited for so long.

Hearing him say that he loves me. Makes me don’t want to cause him a lot of damage again. I already did hurt him and now I’m scared of ruining him by loving him again.

Namumungay ang mga mata kong tumingin sa kaniya. He looked at me in dazed, too. He pulled himself inside my womb. At nanatili siyang nakapaibabaw sa akin. Then he kissed my ears and my cheeks, planted it softly with his lips. And now embracing me tightly while his face remained buried on my neck.

Naipikit ko ang aking mga mata at hindi na namalayan ang sumunod na nangyari. Ang mainit niyang hininga sa aking leeg ay naghahatid ng kakaibang kiliting muli sa akin.

He said that he loves me and I was wishing that it wasn’t a lie. Because I also loved him and I wanted to be with him.

Kabanata 36

Kabanata 36

Fiance

Iminulat ko ang aking mga mata at nakitang wala na si Ace sa aking tabi. Madilim na rin ang paligid. I sat on my bed at napangiwi ako ng may maramdamang mahapdi sa aking katawan. I looked down there. I’m still sore and I don’t think that I can walk.

Napangiwi rin ako dahil nung unang gabi naman namin noon ay halos hindi ko naman ininda ng ganito ang sakit na idinulot niya sa akin. Pero ngayon ay ani mong nawarak ako ng sobra. Is that how he became huge and massive when the years passed that we haven’t seen each other? Or it’s on him that he was roughed on me last night unlike our first time before that he was gentle because it’s my first?

I then shook my head to take off my head the running worldly things I am thinking. I looked at the table beside my bed at nagugulat na makita ang mga pagkaing nakahanda roon. The table was set and nicely prepared.

“You’re awake,” rinig ko mula sa aking kabilang banda.

Nakita ko si Ace na nananatiling nakatayo sa aking gilid na nakatapis lamang ng tuwalya. Napaiwas naman agad ako ng tingin.

Naaasiwa akong pinamulahan ng pisngi habang ang mga mata ay nakatingin sa mga pagkaing nasa kabilang gilid ko.

So he takes his bath kaya pala wala siya sa aking tabi.

“Are you still sore, baby? I’m sorry if became that rough on you last night. I just missed you so bad.” mahinang aniya.

Naramdaman kong lumubog ang gilid ng kama ko. Tumingin ako sa kaniya at saka umusod palapit sa kaniyang gawi.

He put his hand at my waist and looked at me. I smiled at him a little. This man who always makes me feel intimidate and mad is the one I want to be with. I didn’t say my proof word to him but what I gave him was enough to say that I loved him.

Hindi ako sigurado kung totoo ba ang narinig kong sinabi niya sa akin kagabi na mahal niya ako. But I believe him. He does so much for me and trust is all I can give to him.

“You’re mine now,” I inherent as I caressed his jaw. Nakangiti ko siyang hinawakan.

I looked at his body and ignored the piece of towel that was only covering his lower body even it’s noticeable. He held my hand who touches his jaw and put it in his chest. I then lift my gazes on him.

I felt his cold chest that became warm as I feel his heartbeat. Napatingin ako sa kaniya. He looked at me and parted his lips. He licked his lower lip before he speaks.

“I’m yours, Blair. Because I never let anyone owns me after you left.”

I equal his glare. The day I left him, it was a heartbreak for me. That day, I was in so much pain and sadness. I decided based on what I feel. I left him because I thought he left me first by playing me around.

“I’m sorry,” tanging nasabi ko.

He let sigh. “That day, I want to explain myself to you. Walang namamagitan sa amin ni Lisa.”

“But I saw your picture together. You… were kissing each other.” iniwas ko ang aking tingin at bumaling sa kaniyang dibdib kung saan nakalapat ang aking kamay.

His heartbeat was loud and intense. It’s like my heartbeat, pounding crazily every time he is with me.

“She kissed me and I pulled out immediately. And that picture was a long time ago. I don’t want it to ruin us again, alright?” He inquired deeply.

Tumingala ako para tumingin sa kaniya.

“It was all in the past. Iba na tayo ngayon Ace. I was naive and innocent before. And I want to make it with you now.”

Isinandal ko ang aking mukha sa kaniyang dibdib habang ang kamay niya ay marahang hinahawakan ang aking ulo.

“I hope you can forgive me, Ace,” I mumbled softly.

He wrapped me with his tight embrace.

“You don’t know how much I’m happy that you are here with me now again. And can I never forgive you because you have done nothing wrong to me, Blair.” His deep husky voice sends shivers on me.

Isinubsob ko na ang mukha ko sa kaniyang dibdib. Hindi na nakayanang pigilan pa ang mga luha kong namutawi dahil sa mga salitang binibitawan niya para sa akin.

This is how Iucky I am to have him in my life. I never thought that this man that I just admire when I was a kid is now here with me. Doing everything just to keep me safe. Doing everything just for me to trust him again.

We finished our meal and that day was a long day for me. We did what we did last night and we both now happy that we’re together again.

I sleep in his bed. Hindi na ako nakalipat pa ng kuwarto dahil hindi niya rin ako hinayaan. Hindi na rin naman gano’n kasakit ang parteng iyon ng katawan ko dahil ilang beses niya rin akong inangkin sa maghapong ito.

The next day, we planned to go back to Manila. We need to clear and get justice for my parents. He says that senator Fuentes was now arrested by the police. Masaya naman ako dahil kahit na ganoon ang nangyari sa amin ay tinulungan pa rin nya ako. I have my own detectives and it was recently. Sigurado akong pareho lang ang lalabas na suspect.

He held my hand tightly as the helicopter maneuvered. We are now leaving the island. Natatanaw ko na ang sibilisasyon sa hindi kalayuan sa ibaba ng himpapawid. Tumingin ako kay Ace. He looked at me assuringly while the grip of his hands on mine getting tight.

Maingay ang helicopter kaya hindi ko marinig ang sinasabi ni Ace nang makababa na kami. The wind was wild and their guards scattered at the helipad of their building.

He holds me and helped me down. At nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa maraming tauhan nila na nandito ngayon at nakaabang sa amin lahat.

This is like the situation in our house before when Dad and Mom were alive. It seems that there is something wrong. Pwede namang limang tauhan lang ang umakyat para sa amin pero ang dami nila ngayong nagkalat sa paligid.

“The media was on the lobby, Sir. They are waiting for Ms. Cortez.” ani ng isang tauhan ni Ace nang makalapit kami ng elevator.

Napatingin naman ako kay Ace, he also glances at me.

“Why are the media are here? Paalisin niyo sila. Use our force to scare them.” seryosong ani Ace.

Hinawakan ko naman siya sa kaniyang braso. He seems mad when he said it.

“Ace,” I called to calm him down.

“They will just interview you about the past and I don’t want to stress you, Blair.”

“Then don’t be angry, it’s your guards and I think they will do what you have said.”

He sighed and looked at his man.

“Go and do what I said,” mahinahon niyang ani ngayon.

“We are going to eat our lunch first before we go home. I made us a reservation.” He then informed me.

Nagtungo na kami ng elevator. Bumaba kami sa basement ng building. Their establishment was not familiar to me but I guess this was one of their big estates. May nakaabang na tauhan sa amin na lumapit at inabot ang susi kay Ace nang makarating kami sa parking lot.

Ace held me towards his car. It was luxurious than ever. He always used flashy things that always caught the attention of others. But like what I said, this was just simple to him. I smiled at that thought.

Nakita kong nagtatakang tumingin sa akin si Ace nang makasakay kami ng sasakyan niya. He arched his brow, asking for what am I plastering about. I looked at him and frowned.

Tinitigan niya pa ako ng ilang sandali, animong hinihintay akong magsalita bago niya paandarin ang sasakyan.

“Uhm, your car was so flashy. Hindi kaya tayo makita ng media, baka makilala nila itong sasakyan mo.” I protruded my lips at him.

“No, they weren’t. The guards will do the job to make their attention diverted.” tumingin na siya sa daan at saka inumpisahang paandarin ang sasakyan.

“Saan tayo?” I asked him nonchalantly.

Nakita ko ang mga taong nagkakagulo sa labas ng building nila nang madaanan namin iyon. My forehead creased when I saw them like they were protesting.

I turned my way to Ace while he is seriously looking at the road.

“Where do you want?” Ngumiti siya ng mapansing nakatitig ako sa kaniya.

I smell that something is happening. I opted to act like normal.

“In the restaurant…to where does our first date happen?” I surmised.

He just tugged up the side of his lips, forming into a smirk. Then I remembered what he said earlier.

“Oh, wait! You said that you made us a reservation? Pa’no na ’yon?” Tanong ko pa dahil baka do’n kami kumain ngayon sa aking sinabing lugar just to not disappoint me.

“Well, definitely we are actually heading to the place you wanted to go. The reservation I made was there.”

I was surprised at first. But later on, I leered at him before I turned my gaze at the road. I shut my eyes to take a nap. Napagod din ako sa biyahe namin kaya nakatulog ako.

I opened my eyes slowly when I felt our car stopped. I saw Ace staring at me with a glint in his eyes. He’s near to me, so close that I even feel his hot breath hitting my skin.

Napatingin ako sa nakaawang niyang mapupulang labi. He licked it and of a sudden, I just found myself kissing him now.

He kissed me thoroughly. I gasped when his kisses lowered then back to my lips again. I felt his hand cupped my boobs. The soft moaned came out as I kissed him back. We’re still inside his car and I can’t just stop myself from kissing him thoroughly.

I was pulling him more closer to me as I grip his button-down shirt. Hindi ko na inisip pa kung magugusot ko ang suot niya. All I think right now is to feel him again.

Mabilis niyang naalis ang pang-ibabaw kong suot. I was wearing my simple ruffled blush off-shoulder top paired with jeans. It was so easy to drop it for him and in an instant, he was now drooling over my hardened peaks that exposed on him.

I arched my back as I felt his hot mouth nibbling my mounds.

“Ace… Ohh, b-baka may makakita sa’tin.” ani ko habang liyong liyo sa ginagawa niya sa aking dibdib.

He paused and looked at me. My eyes were drowned by the tingling sensation that he made in my abdomen. He was tracing a thin circle there that made my head running in the wilderness.

“I won’t let them see this. It is just for me and no one would their touching my girl, I killed them first before they laid at you.” he gravely uttered.

Malakas ang pintig ng puso ko at hindi magkandaugaga sa nararamdaman. He continued doing it while his other hand was giving the same attention to my other boob.

I bit my lower lip to stop myself from growling. I felt him touch my sensitive clit. I moved and pulled him more. He kissed me downward until I heard him unzipped my jeans.

“Ace!” I almost protest but my sounds said it oppositely.

I was now panting when I felt him rubbing my folds. He touches it while his mouth was slowly kissing my sensitive clit.

Naramdaman ko pang yumuko siya ng bahagya at may inabot sa aking tagiliran. At nagulat nalang ako kalaunan nang bumaba ang sandalan ng aking likuran dahilan para mapahiga ako ng bahagya sa aking kinauupuan.

He completely pulled down my jeans down to my knees. And I was losing my sanity when he starts sucking my folds. I arched my back because of the tingling sensation that is now started to build.

His tounge twirl and making some lines like a sword that slicing me crazily. I disheveled his hair when I felt something is building up that early.

Napahawak ako sa bibig ko at napakapit sa buhok niya nang maramdamang malapit na agad ako. He was so sharp that he already makes me cum just by his cunning tongue. It was pointed and quick that made me curls my toes. I was pushing him away to stop it because I was on my verge but he keeps on doing it.

“Ace, stop…s-stop,” I don’t know if it still sounds that I wanted him to stop doing it or it is almost a growl that makes him more inspired to do it.

Then suddenly I convulsed after that hyperventilating explosion. It was mind-blowing that I saw him still licking me. Cleaning the mess that I made because of him.

“Ace I said stop!” it almost sounds like a beg and not a protest to what he is doing.

“You taste so good baby that I can’t stop myself from eating you.” He murmured darkly as his eyes directly on me.

He stopped and zipped my jeans back to their normal after he cleaned me by his mouth then rinse with his wipes just to make it cleaner and make me comfortable. He also put my tops perfectly while me looking at him intently.

He fixed himself and looked at me for a while.

I can’t believe him! I then let a heavy sigh. We just did it here in his frigging car! It’s also my fault but I can’t help but shout at him on my mind.

“We’re here, I know you’re hungry.”

“Baka may nakakita sa atin,” I keep on saying as I felt my cheeks heated. Because it’s still bugging me.

“My car is tinted, and I won’t do it if they will see us.”

“Ace! Stop it! I hate you!” I then rolled my eyes, irritated at him.

He smirked at me and chuckled sexily afterward. I irritatedly looked at him while he is tugged-up lips bore in me.

“I know you can’t hate me. You looked so beautiful when you are blushing even if you look at me angrily.” He then held my hand.

Mabilis kong binawi ang kamay ko sa kaniya.

“It’s your fault Ace! I didn’t know that you are this perverted bastard.” ani ko at nauna nang lumabas ng kaniyang sasakyan.

Mabilis naman niya akong nahabol at hinuli ang aking palapulsuhan. Nagugulat akong tumingin sa kaniya nang makita ang lugar na aming papasukan ngayon.

It was the hotel that saw my first kiss and the first night with him. It was the place where I said my ’yes to him.

I snapped out of my thoughts when someone approached us. It’s their guards. Sinamahan kami nito hanggang sa makapasok ng lobby at makasakay ng elevator.

Tumingin ako kay Ace at tipid akong ngumiti sa kaniya.

“This is the place where I make our reservation. Hope you are not mad at me,” he said then held my waist. Pertaining that I’m his territory.

Bumukas ang elevator at may sumalubong agad na staff sa amin.

“Good afternoon Miss Cortez, Mr. Ventura,” magalang na ani nito sa amin.

Pumasok kami ng isang room that is designated for our private lunch. Walang tao at kami lang ang narito ngayon. We order our meal and wait for it in a bit. Naiilang akong tumingin kay Ace nang mapansin kong seryoso ang mukha nito.

“Are you mad?” he asked me.

“Who wouldn’t I? I’m just irritated,” pag-arte ko.

I’m not mad at him nor irritated. I just like his serious scowl. Because he looked more handsome when he is serious.

I stood up, “I will just go to the restroom,” paalam ko sa kaniya.

He just nodded, nakita ko pang tumingin siya sa labas at nakita ko ang isang tauhan niyang naroon.

“Huwag mo na akong pasundan, I can do it Ace.”

“It’s for our safety Blair, please.” animong alam niyang tatanggihan ko kaya nakiusap na siya. Who am I to disobey his ’please?

I went out and go to the restroom with his man guarding me outside. Pagkatapos ko ay nakita ko ang guard na nakasunod pa rin sa akin. At nang mamukhaan ko siya ay mabilis na nangunot ang aking noo.

I approached him and surveyed his body and face. At halos manlaki ang mga mata ko nang makumpirmang si Denis iyon.

“Denis,” seryosong ani ko, nagugulat at natitigilan kong pagtawag sa kaniya.

He disappeared after the second step of our plan and I no longer know where he went. I thought he left and never had a plan to go back. I thought he will find me dahil matagal na rin akong hindi nakakauwi pagkatapos ng gabing iyon.

He looked at me. “Ma’am Blair,” mayamaya ay aniya habang ang tingin ay naglilibot sa paligid.

“Where did you come from and why are you here now? Why did you disappear that night?” sunod sunod kong tanong sa kaniya.

Wala na akong plano pang maghiganti sa mga Ventura lalo na at nalaman kong wala naman pala talaga silang kinalaman. I was just furious at them that I did those things to them. And it was a pang of whole life guilt for me.

“Halika na po Ma’am Blair, itatakas na kita rito.” Aniya sa akin kalaunan.

Wala ang ibang bantay ni Ace. Siya lang ang nakikita kong nasa paligid ngayon dahil nasa labas lang ito ng restroom na pinasukan ko.

“No, I have my lunch here, hindi ako aalis. And for goodness sake, saan ka ba nanggaling at ngayon ka lang sumulpot?”

“Masyadong mabilis ang mga nangyari Ma’am Blair. Nang gabing iyon ay hindi ko rin alam kung nasaan ako. Nakatakas lan din ako mula sa kamay ng mga Ventura. May pinaplano silang hindi maganda para sa inyo at hindi ko iyon hahayaang mangyari.”

Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. He was also been kidnapped?

“What do you mean? The Ventura  kidnapped you?”

“Yes, at muntikan pa nila akong ipapatay.”

I was shocked. I didn’t know that it happened to him. Buong akala ko ay nagpakalayo layo na siya at iniwanan na ako sa ere pero hindi pala.

“P-Paanong nangyari iyon? The Ventura was not our enemy here. It is the Fuentes who killed my parents. So why would the Ventura’s will do that to you?”

Seryoso niya akong tiningnan sa mga mata. “Ma’am Blair, huwag kayong masyadong magtiwala sa mga taong minsan ng sumira ng tiwala ninyo. They were hiding something from you and I knew that it can help to save their family reputation.”

“But Denis they are not! So stop blaming okay? Your job was to guard me and not to meddle with my problems.”

Tatalikuran ko na sana siya nang maalala ko si Manang.

“Kumusta pala si Manang, Denis? Hinahanap niya ba ako?” baling ko pa sa kaniya.

“Mabuti naman siya simula nang makauwi ako. Oo, hinahanap ka niya kaya nag-aalala na ’yon sa’yo.” tipid niyang sagot at mabilis na naglakad papaalis. He was wearing a cap.

Tatawagin ko pa sana siya ngunit nang makita ko naman si Ace na naglalakad patungo sa gawi ko ay napabaling muli ako ng tingin sa gawi ni Denis. And when I took a glance at Ace’s way, he looked mad and worried at the same as he walked towards me. Lumingon pa akong muli sa gawi ni Denis kung saan siya naglakad paalis pero mabilis na siyang nawala roon.

“Where is your guard?” tanong ni Ace sa akin pagkalapit niya.

“I don’t know, kakalabas ko lang.” Hindi ako nakita ni Ace na nakikipag-usap kanina kay Denis at ayaw ko ring ipahamak siya. Maybe he thinks that it was all Ventura’s agenda.

I want to believe Denis but I trusted Ace. He doesn’t explain everything to me about the Fuentes but I already believed him.

We ate our lunch peacefully that afternoon.

“I want to go home Ace,” ani ko matapos niyang sagutin ang isang tawag mula sa opisina. We are now here inside his car.

Tumingin siya sa akin. “Okay, I’ll drop you home then. I’ll just go there tomorrow to visit you.” aniya habang pinapaandar ang makina ng kaniyang sasakyan.

“I’ll text you when I’m home, just reply to me when you have time. We need to secure your house because the Fuentes was still in their hot state. Magpapadala ako ng mga tauhang magbabantay sa inyo roon ni Manang.”

“But my phone… walang signal,” I told him like it was his fault kaya nasira ang aking telepono.

“I will send you your new phone tomorrow-”

“No! Bibili ako ng sarili kong cellphone. I can buy it myself, Ace. Stop spending your money on me.” apila ko pa sa kaniya.

Iniliko niya ang sasakyan at tinahak namin ang ibang daan. Napapantastikuhan naman akong tumingin sa kaniya.

“Saan tayo pupunta?” hindi niya ako sinagot hanggang sa marating namin ang isang mall.

He parked his car before he turned on me.

“Why are we here? Ang sabi ko gusto ko nang umuwi and now we are here at the mall?”

“Let’s buy your new phone then,” mabilis niyang binuksan ang pinto ng kaniyang sasakyan pati na rin ang sa akin.

Naglalakad kami sa loob ng mall at halos lahat ay napapatingin sa aming gawi. Ace air was always new for the people. He always caught their attention in that hasty way without doing anything.

Pumasok kami sa isang cyber zone. It wasn’t an android so I thought of backing out.

“This is an expensive shop! I don’t need an iPhone, Android phone can do.” ani ko sa kaniya.

He held my wrist at hinila ako papasok.

“I won’t let you pay for this Blair, kahit na tumanggi ka hindi kita papayagang gawin ang gusto mo.” he seriously said.

I pouted, I looked away as he gets the latest phone that this brand has. Nakangiting sinalubong siya ng mga sales lady at naiirita ko namang hinapit ang braso ni Ace.

Napatingin siya sa akin. “Uhm, titingin lang ako don,” turo ko sa mga ibang phones kahit na alibi ko lang naman ’yon.

He just nods at me because he was now busy paying for the phone he wanted to buy for me. Iniwan ko muna siya at naglakad para tumingin tingin sa ibang gadgets na mayroon sila. At nagulat nalang ako nang may biglang humila sa akin.

Napatingin ako sa babaeng kumaladkad sa akin patungo rito sa pinaka sulok ng store.

It was Lisa, she looked at me furiously. “What are you doing here with Ace?” She asked with her brows arched in furrowed.

I build my posture and looked at her pitiful. “You shouldn’t care about our business, Lisa. Make your own and not that you are making a scene here.” I said with my eyes pierced at her.

Ngumisi pa siya sa akin na animong iritang irita na siya pero pinipigilan lang niyang sumabog.

“Why would I make a scene here? Baka ikaw, nang-aagaw ng may fiance na.” she proudly said.

Kumunot naman ang noo ko sa sinabi niya. Fiance? Shit. So the rumored about them was real? My lips parted when I saw her ring on her finger.

“A-Anong ibig mong sabihin?” I tried not to stutter and manage my composure to look like I wasn’t a setback.

She crossed her arms and looked at me from head to foot. Then raised her brows.

“I and Ace were already engaged. The media was trying to find his mistress kaya nandito ako para sabihan ka. You are still a slut, you never changed, Blair.” napaiwas ako ng tingin at tumingin sa gawi ni Ace nang sabihin niya iyon.

He was busy fixing what we bought at the sales lady as I saw him gets his credit card now. I can’t believe that we are here again. I trust him and yet I’m still getting confused about what he is saying to me.

I want to believe him but my mind was clouded by Lisa’s words. He was engaged to her and he just make out with me.

Binalingan ko naman si Lisa ng may kampante at matalim kong mga tingin.

“You’re just saying these because we are now together. You ruined our relationship before kaya hindi ko hahayaang mangyari pa iyong muli.” I said to her sharply.

Nakita ko naman siyang matigilan.

“Kayo na? Huh, I’m his fiance and you’re just the mistress. He’s just using you because of your body and not because he loves you. Remember how you make his life miserable? You think he’ll go back again to you after you break him apart?”

Parang may punyal na sumasaksak sa puso ko nang sinabi niya iyon. I don’t want to believe her but my heart sank when I remembered everything I have done for him. It was all the worse of me.

I never make him happy and all I did was to ruin them. Tinalikuran ako ni Lisa kalaunan na ikinabigla ko makita kong lapitan niya si Ace.

And when I took a glance on Ace’s way, I saw him looking around, animong hinahanap kung nasaan ako. Hindi naman ako lumabas at nananatili akong nakatago at hindi nagpapakita sa kaniya.

Then I saw Lisa go to his way and pressed her cheek to Ace. Ace was just stern and his narrowed eyes were now directly on Lisa. Nakita ko kung paanong magulat at matigilan si Ace sa ginawa jo Lisa pero kalaunan ay nakita kong mag-usap sila.

Nag-usap sila ng sandali pero hindi ko na rin tinapos pa. Umalis na ako at naglakad na palabas cyber zone. Nahinto lang ako s paglalakad nang marinig kong may tumatawag sa akin. It was Ace pero hindi ko siya hinarap.

Sinundan niya ako at ramdam kong hindi siya tumigil sa pagsunod sa akin. I trusted him again and I felt like he lied to me all his life. Pero hindi ko hahayaang masira kaming muli ng dahil lang sa hindi ko pag-unawa.

He said that he loves me and that is enough for me to say that he is not lying to me. Lisa was just a bitter and assuming woman of Ace, a desperate bitch that only want us to tear apart.

“Blair, what’s going on?” Dinig ko ang malalim na boses ni Ace sa aking likuran.

Lumingon naman ako sa kaniya. I took a glance.

“I’m not feeling well, Ace. Please take me home.” ani ko.

Nagtataka niya akong tiningnan pero hindi na siya nagtanong pa. He handed me a paper bag. Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Nasa loob na kami ng kaniyang sasakyan ngayon.

Kinuha ko iyon at nakita ang cellphone na binili niya para sa akin.

“My number is already saved, just text me if you need me, alright?” He said and I just nodded at him.

“Thank you,” mahina pero sinsero kong sinabi.

I looked away as he started the engine. I thought our relationship was getting better now.

I want to ask him about what is Lisa told me earlier. It is really still bugging me. I believed him and I trust what he said and I just wish that he really does mean it.

That he really does love me. Because I don’t know how to take the truth that he was now really engaged to Lisa.

Kabanata 37

Kabanata 37

Doubt

Pababa na ako ng sasakyan nang pigilan ako ni Ace. I looked at him and raised my brow.

“What’s the problem?” he seriously muttered.

I shut my parted lips and just frowned at him. I pulled my wrist and open the door. Narinig kong binuksan rin niya ang kabilang pinto senyales na lumabas rin siya.

Pinasadahan ko ng tingin ang aming mansion. It looks old now but Manang Soling keeps it clean, kaya maganda pa ring pagmasdan.

I walk at the entrance at mukha ni Manang ang agad na tumambad sa akin. Niyakap niya ako at gano’n din ako. She was a bit teary when I tightened my embrace.

“Ilang araw kang hindi umuwi hija, saan ka ba nanggaling? Alalang alala na ako at ang uncle mo sa iyo.”

“Pasensya na po Manang may inasikaso lang po kasi ako.”

“Naku hija, tantanan mo na nga ’yang mga inaasikaso mong sinasabi. ’Yan nalang ang madalas mong idahilan sa akin. Sabihin mo nga sa akin ang totoo, saan ka ba talaga nanggaling, ha?”

Nangangapa naman ako ng isasagot kay Manang. I can’t say that Ace kidnapped me kaya nawala ako ng mahigit halos dalawang linggo.

“Kasama ko po siya Manang,” narinig kong sinabi ni Ace sa likuran ko.

Nakita ko naman kung paanong natigilan si Manang at nagtataka akong tiningnan. If I will say yes, Manang will conclude that we are together. Hindi pa namin napag-uusapan ni Ace na ipubliko ang aming relasyon.

Tumingin ako kay Ace.

“I was with him the other day, Manang. Inihatid niya lang po ako ngayon.” Nag-aalangan kong ani.

I saw Ace clenched his jaw. Napakunot ang noo niya at saka nag-iwas sa akin ng tingin.

“Diyos-miyo marimar, sana ay sinabi mong kasama mo siya at nang makampante ako at ang tiyo mo sa ibang bansa, Blair. Sobrang pag-aalala ang naramdaman namin para sa’yo kung alam mo lang. At nasaan ang iyong bantay? Si Denis? Akala ko ay kasa kasama mo siya sa nilakad mo?”

“Denis?” biglabg singit ni Ace na nasa aking tabi na ngayon.

I leered at him and looked away.

“Hindi pa po ba siya umuuwi rito, Manang?” Tanong ko pa.

“Nung nakaraan ay bumalik siya pero mabilis lamang iyon at umalis na rin siya agad.” inalalayan ko si Manang paupo ng sofa sa salas para hindi siya mangalay sa usapan naming nakatayo.

“Hindi ko po alam kung nasaan na siya ngayon. But I saw him kanina,”

“Saan?” biglang sabi ni Ace.

Hindi ko siya tiningnan.

“Blair,” matigas ang boses niya. He seems mad when he called my name.

I turned my gaze to him and looked at him irritatedly.

“Sa hotel kanina,”

Napakunot naman ang noo ni Ace. He seems remembering who is Denis. Natigil ang titigan namin nang may biglang  tumunog. Tumingin pa siya sa akin bago niya kinuha ang kaniyang phone.

He answered his call. Bahagyang lumayo at tumalikod siya sa amin.

“Hija, nakapagtanghalian ka na ba?”

“Opo Manang, tapos na po kami ni Ace mananghalian kanina bago umuwi rito.”

Naniningkit ang mga matang tumingin sa akin si Manang. She held my hand and looked at me straight in the eye.

“Huwag kang mahiyang magsabi sa akin hija kung anong namamagitan sa inyo. Bata ka pa lamang alam ko na iyang nararamdaman mo.” pabulong niyang sinabi.

I turned my gaze at Ace’s way. He is still busy talking to his phone. I gulped when I looked at Manang Soling. She’s looking at me with bright eyes that tell that it’s fine with her.

I want to tell her about my relationship with Ace but I am not ready for it. I just want it only for us, for now. And if the time comes and I’m ready to tell her, I will tell her and also to my uncle. But before that happened I need to ask Ace if Lisa and him were engaged. I don’t want to just break up with him without knowing the truth. I don’t want the past to bring itself again.

My naive self was gone and I am new now. I believe that I changed now. I need to decide what is right ng hindi nagpapadala sa aking emosyon. I need to act and think rationally this time.

“The police called,” nakatiim ang bagang ni Ace na tumingin sa amin pagkatapos niyang sagutin ang tawag.

My forehead creased and curiously looked at him.

“Nakatakas si Senator,”

My eyes widened as I let a loud sighed.

“Senator? Si senator Fuentes ba hijo?” tanong ni Manang pagkaraan.

“Opo Manang,” sagot ni Ace sa tanong nito sa kaniya.

“Bakit? Ano bang nangyari at napakulong siya?” nagtataka at walang kaide-ideyang tanong ni Manang muli.

“Manang Soling, he’s the killer. He killed my parents and it was all his plan.” my lips were in a grim line when I said that to her. And I saw Ace’s brow shut up.

“Marimar santisima, paanong nangyari iyon? Mabuti naman at nalaman na, na siya pala ang masamang damong ligaw na may gawa ng lahat ng ito. Dapat siyang magdusa at pagbayaran ang lahat ng kasamaang ginawa niya.” Ani Manang na may mariing tingin na ngayon.

“Paano siya nakatakas? Imposibleng makatakas siya, maliban nalang kung may tutulong sa kaniyang makalabas ng kulungan.” Tumingin sa akin si Ace matapos kong sabihin iyon sa kaniya.

“Hindi pa natin alam kung paano pero isang anggulo lang ang tinitingnan namin ngayon. That there is someone is really helping him outside.” Ace then muttered to me.

Napaisip ako at matalim siyang tiningnan. I won’t let that senator escaped from what he did. He deserved to be punished. He needs to be rotten in jail.

“We already informed the airports pati na rin ang mga daungan ng barko. Hindi siya pwedeng makatakas. Our men and the police were there looking for him in case he’s going out of the country.” Ani pang muli ni Ace sa akin.

“By what he is doing now, he only proves that he’s guilty. What about his daughter, have you checked her?” diretsang tanong ko sa kaniya.

I don’t want to be rude and let my feelings surface. But I can’t stop myself from getting mad at him. Lisa said that she’s engaged to him even before that I only thought it was rumored. I didn’t buy their acts because I thought they were just only pretending.

His jaw moved. I then turned to Manang.

“Uhm Manang, magpahinga na po muna kayo.” Marahang ani ko.

“O siya sige. Balitaan niyo ako tungkol sa mga nangyayari. Marami tayong pag-uusapan hija.” she said as she stood up. Tumingin pa siya kay Ace bago kami tuluyang iwanan at umalis.

Nang tuluyan na ngang nakaalis si Manang ay bumaling agad ako kay Ace.

“What if Lisa Fuentes help his father out of the jail? She should be investigated Ace,”

“I know, but first we need to secure your house. Tinawagan ko na ang mga tauhan ko at papunta na sila rito para magbantay.”

“But Ace have you told them about Lisa? Investigate her now baka pati siya ay makatakas.” I said again when I noticed that he wasn’t paying attention to what I’m saying.

“She’s not the suspect Blair. We are now searching about what happens and his footsteps whereabouts-”

“But she can be the suspect Ace! How could you say this? She’s the daughter and she can do everything just to help his father.” I raised my voice in frustration and disbelief that why can’t he saw this angle that Lisa might help his father.

He looked away. Naiinis naman akong lumapit sa kaniya. I stood up and walk towards him.

“Ace, Lisa is so desperate to you and she can be-”

“That’s bothering you, right? Tell me, anong sinabi sayo ni Lisa?”

Naguguluhan naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. What is he talking about? We are talking here about his fiance and not about what she told me.

“She talked to you, kaya gano’n nalang ang pag-iwas mo sa akin kanina matapos natin siyang makita sa mall.”

I looked down. He is right. It is still bugging me. And I didn’t know that he knew that I saw Lisa and have talked to her as well. I just thought that he was pretty preoccupied earlier that he can’t seem to pay attention to me.

Hinawakan niya ang aking baba at inangat ito. Hinuli niya ang aking mga tingin at saka maramdaming idinikit ang noo niya sa noo ko. Naipikit ko naman ang aking mga mata nang maramdaman ko ang kaniyang hiningang tumatama sa aking ilong.

I feel like I was tamed by him. He makes me calm easily in that simple move.

“What is it Blair, tell me please. I’m going crazy by thinking about it. Please, baby, tell me.” he huskily said in plead on me.

“It’s not important. I trusted you Ace kaya alam kong imposible iyong mangyari.” mahina kong sagot sa kaniya.

“Hmm, then why are you mad?”

“I-I’m not, I’m just irritated by what she said and it’s bugging me.”

Iniyapos niya ang isa niyang braso sa aking baywang at saka ako hinapit palapit pa lalo sa kaniya.

“Then tell me what’s bugging you baby,”

I swallowed hard before I started to speak.

“She said that you’re engaged to her. I don’t want to believe her, but… but I don’t know.” I looked at him. Nananatiling nakapikit ang kaniyang mga mata.

“I told you, I am only yours. No one owns me except you Blair.”

“But what about the ring? He showed me a ring, Ace.” I asked like it was the evidence.

But he just only sighed and didn’t answer me. Kumawala ako sa hawak niya. Hindi ko maintindihan kung totoo ba ang mga sinasabi niya. Why he can’t answer my question this time? It’s just only about the ring then he just let out a sigh?

Mabilis niya naman akong hinila pababa ng sahig nang may marinig kaming putok ng baril. Nakapatong siya sa akin at mabilis ang kabog ng dibdib ko.

“Ano ’yon Ace?” kinakabahan at nagpapanic ko nang tanong sa kaniya. I feel like it was like the day I heard a loud thud of the gun when my parents died.

Umalis siya sa pagkakaibabaw sa akin at gumagapang kaming tinungo ang gawing kusina ng bahay. Pinapaulanan kami ng bala ng baril.sa mga oras ito. At halos himatayin ako sa tindi ng kabang nararamdaman ko ngayon. Nagkalat at nagbagsakan ang mga gamit namin at maingay ang buong paligid.

The loud noise from the guns outside was firing us. Ace held my hand and took me to the kitchen. We hide at the back of the wall and duck near the countertop.

Mabilis ang pintig ng puso ko sa kaba at maingay ang paghinga kong humarap sa kaniya.

“S-Si Manang Ace, si Manang! Nasa taas siya at baka kung anong mangyari sa kaniya Ace.” nag-aalala kong sinabi. Nagbabadya na rin ang mga luha sa aking mga mata.

It feels like it happens before. The day when my parents died. I want to keep them safe but I came too late. They were killed and I did nothing.

My tears rolled down as I pulled my hand to Ace. I need to go upstairs for Manang. I need to save her. I don’t wanna lose her too.

“No Blair, stop. Baka ikaw ang mapahamak-”

“But Ace, si Manang! I need to go and make sure that she is safe. Hindi ko mapapatawad ang sarili ko kapag may nangyari sa kaniyang masama. Siya nalang at si uncle ang meron ako, I don’t want to lose someone special to me again. Not again.” My hot tears were falling on my cheeks profusely.

“Stay here, ako ang aakyat.”

Mabilis siyang umalis at hindi na ako nakaapila pa. Naluluha akong nag-iisip kung ano ba ang gagawin. Patuloy pa rin sa pag-ulan ng bala dito sa loob ng aming bahay na nagmumula sa labas.

And when I saw Ace’s phone ringing beside me. I hurriedly get it and swipe the call to answer.

“H-Hello? Sino ito?” tanong ko dahil unregistered ang numerong tumawag.

“How was my surprise, Blair? Do you like it?” malaki ang boses ng nasa kabilang linya.

“Who are you?” Kinakabahan ko ng tanong dahil hindi ko ito mahimigan.

“Hindi ba at mga Ventura ang sinisisi mo sa pagkamatay ng iyong mga magulang pero bakit ngayon ay ako ang nadedehado?” madilim at malamig na ang tono niya ngayon.

Humupa naman na ang ingay ng putok ng mga baril mula sa labas. Napatingin ako sa paligid at nananatiling nakatago sa likod ng pader.

“Hayop ka senator! Magbabayad ka sa mga kahayupang ginawa mo lalong lalo na sa pamilya ko! I will make you suffer to it!” nanggagalaiti kong sagot sa kaniya nang maisip kong siya nga itong kausap ko ngayon at wala ng iba pa.

Malademonyo naman siyang tumawa bago nagsalitang muli mula sa kabilang linya.

“Alam mo ba kung gaano ka kaestupida? Pinaghigantihan mo lang naman ang mga taong walang kinalaman sa iyo. Ano nalang ang gagawin ng mga magulang ni Ace sa oras na malaman nilang ikaw ang may gawa ng lahat ng ito.”

Nanigas ako sa kinatataguan ko.

“Don’t turn the blame on me. It was your fault and you should rot in hell. You killed my parents and now you are trying to kill me. Kaya huwag mo akong matakot takot sa mga pinagsasabi mo. I’m not scared of what they will feel if they know that it was me. I’m aware of my sins and I accept punishments unlike you who escaped, scared to be punished.” I said with conviction as my voice sharpened at the same time.

“Hindi ko alam na ang mahiyain at mukhang takot sa mundong bata na katulad mo noon ay magiging ganito na katapang ngayon. I’m impressed but this will take you time. The justice that you are looking for was now gone. Makukuha mo lang iyon sa oras na mahuli mo ako. Try to catch me, Blair, if you want me to get punished.” That’s all that he said then he dropped the call.

Nangagalaiti akong tumingin sa cellphone matapos niyang ibaba iyon. I saved his number to track him. At nang marinig kong may dumating na mga sasakyan. Lumabas ako ng bahagya para silipin kung sino iyon. Nakita kong mga tauhan iyon ni Ace na kadarating lang.

The guards were actually useless. They came when the trouble was already done.

Nakita kong pababa nang hagdan si Manang at Ace. Agad ko namang nilapitan si Manang at saka niyakap ng mahigpit.

“Ayos ka lang ba hija?” nag-aalalang tanong nito sa akin.

Tango lang ako ng tango at hindi nagsasalita. Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala sa nangyayari. What if one of us shoots by the rain bullets? I can’t imagine myself getting mad and broken if that happens.

Nilapitan ko si Ace at saka mabilis na yumakap din sa kaniya. I buried my face in his chest as he hugged me tightly s well.

“It’s gonna be okay Blair, I’m here now,” he said as he caressed my hair softly.

Inalis ko sa pagkakabaon ang aking mukha mula sa kaniyang dibdib at nag-aalalang tumingin sa kaniyang mga mata.

I then traced his body if he is okay and I gasped in relief when I saw that he’s fine. Then I gulped later on when I remembered that someone called him.

“Someone called to your phone and it was senator,” sabi ko kay Ace na ngayon ay hawak na ang cellphone iniabot ko sa kaniya.

“Sir, dumating na po ang mga pulis.” imporma ng isang tauhan ni Ace.

Napatingin naman kami sa pinto nang sunod sunod na pumasok ang mga pulis roon. I feel angry and bitter that the police weren’t here earlier when the people outside are firing our bullets.

Nakita kong inihanda nila ang mga gamit at nakita ko ang mga taong magbabantay sa mansion. Masyadong maraming tao ngayon ang nandito pero tanging iilan lang ang nakapukaw ng atensyon ko sa mga pumasok.

I saw Johnson and Bench, his brother came up.

“Hey man, anong nangyari?” tanong ni Bench kay Ace. Lumapit naman sa akin si Johnson at niyakap ako. I hugged him back. Napansin ko namang nakamasid si Ace sa amin ni Johnson habang kinakausap niya si Bench.

“Someones called, track his number baka makatulong ito para mahanap natin ang location ni senator.” iniabot ni Ace phone niya kay Bench.

Mabilis namang inilabas nito ang sim at may tinawag siya sa isang grupo at may inilabas na bagay. It’s like they are going to track it now. I saw them tried to call the unregistered number but it was now out of the coverage.

“Kumusta ka na Blair? Ayos ka lang ba?” simpleng tanong si Johnson sa akin.

Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kaniya dahil animong ayos lang na ngayon kami nagkita. It seems like he asked me that it’s normal that he hadn’t seen me for weeks. He doesn’t even ask that where I get from dahil ang tagal ko ring nawala.

Saglit akong natigilan pero kalaunan ay nagawa ko namang sagutin ang kaniyang tanong sa akin.

“Mabuti naman ako. Nagkamali ako ng taong pinaghigantihan Johnson. Hindi ang mga Ventura ang pumatay sa mga magulang ko.” Ani ko sa kaniya dahil simula pa lang ay siya na yung taong sumama at gumabay sa akin nung mga panahong kailangan ko ng katulong sa paghihiganti sa mga Ventura.

“Alam ko,”

Aniya kalaunan na ikinagulat ako dahil sa kaniyang naging tugon.

“Alam mong ano? Na hindi sila ang may pakana ng lahat ng ito?” Nagugulat at natitigilan kong tanong pang muli.

“Uh-huh,” I slapped his arm after he admits.

“I can’t believe you, Johnson! And you let me do all those horrible things to them! Why you didn’t tell me earlier? Pinag mukha mo akong tanga.” nagagalit ko namang sinabi sa kaniya.

He chuckled then looked at me, apologizingly.

“Lately ko lang rin nalaman when Bench was always out then I found out that it is his job to find the culprit. Katulong siya ni Ace sa paghahanap then I helped them then we found out that it was senator Fuentes.”

So he knew it all first? Kelan pa?

“When did you know all of this?” Tanong ko pang muli sa kaniya.

“The day you plant a faked bombs at the OV Hotel of the Ventura’s. It was all planned and set up.”

“What? Anong set up? Why you didn’t stop me then kung napag-alaman mo pa lang hindi sila kung hindi ang hayop na senator na ’yon ang may gawa?” Nangangalaiti ko ng tanong ngayon sa kaniya

“I have no right to tell you things about it, Blair. Asked your man about it all instead of me,”  he smirked. Tumalikod na siya at tumulong sa imbestigasyon.

Natutop naman ang tingin ko nang makita ko si Ace na may kausap sa telepono niyang muli. Nilapitan ko siya at huminto ako ng marinig kung sino ang kausap niya.

“Where are you, Lisa? Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you. Nasa condo ko ba ikaw?”

And there I halt from taking another step when I heard him asked Lisa.

Fuck him. What is he talking about? Lisa was in his condo? The thick face of Lisa to come there unless they were really together. And Ace? Bakit niya hinahayaan si Lisa roong magpunta?

I’m his girlfriend now and I haven’t been there. What if Ace was just playing me around again and he already got what he wants from me? I gave him myself and he is taking his revenge because I hurt him before and I recently ruined their company.

Then, later on, I felt something stabbing my heart. Umalis na ako bago pa niya maibaba ang tawag. Hinablot ko ang damit ni Johnson at saka hinila siya palabas.

“What the fuck Blair! Saan mo ba ako dadalhin?”

Hinarap ko siya at mariing tiningnan.

“Dalhin mo ako sa condo ni Ace,”

Mabilis naman na kumunot ang noo niya.

“It’s not safe for you to go there. Isa pa hindi ba at si Ace ang dapat na magsama sa’yo ron? Don’t tell me hindi ka pa niya nadadala ron?”

. “Hindi pa kaya nga sa iyo na ako nagpapasama hindi ba?” nauubusan na ng pasensya kong sabi.

Hindi naman makapaniwalang tumingin siya sa akin. Hahawakan ko na sana ang braso niya nang may biglang humila sa braso ko.

It was Ace, he looked dark and menacing at me now. Nakita ko pang tapunan niya ng masamang tingin si Johnson bago niya ako dinala sa veranda ng bahay.

“Where are you going? Hindi ka pwedeng magpunta sa ibang lugar ng ganito ang sitwasyon.” mariing aniya sa akin.

I looked at him indulgently. “So where will I stay? Hindi na kami ligtas ni Manang dito.”

He then clenched his jaw.

“You’re staying in my house, isama mo na rin si Manang dahil mas ligtas kayo ron.”

Sa bahay niya? Oh, I forgot that he has a lot of houses here. But what about his condo unit? For sure we’ll be safer there. It was their hotel so I find it safer

Mas lalo lang nadadagdagan ang hinala ko tungkol sa kaniya at kay Lisa nang marinig ko ang sinabi ni Ace sa kaniya. What if they are really engaged? Is he helping Lisa with his father’s case?

But Ace was on my side so why? Senator Fuentes properties were now on the government, he stole all of those kaya nabawi rin sa kaniya. For sure that the Fuentes have nothing now. Except… of our company.

They have my Dad’s company and I need to get it back from them.

Nang gabing iyon ay hinatid kami ni Ace sa bahay niya. It was huge and luxurious too. The design and the theme of his house were a bit manly because of the shade of black, brown, and white. From the pieces of furniture and walls.

Hindi siya natulog rito ngayong gabi. He said that he has something important to do. Which suspicious to me.

“Saan ka uuwi ngayong gabi?” I asked him after he sends us here.

Hinawakan niya ang aking panga at saka ako dinampian ng mabilis na halik sa aking noo at mga labi.

“Uuwi agad ako ng bahay. I will just gonna check Mom and Dad at may tatapusin din akong trabaho kalunan.”

Umalis na siya at nagpaalam na rin kay manang. He put his number on my new phone and his phone was on the investigator in case na may tumawag ulit ay matrace nila kung nasaan.

Nahiga ako ng kama pagkatapos kong maglinis ng katawan. The whole day was tiring and horrible. I get my phone and click on my social media accounts. At nagulat ako nang makitang finollow ako ni Lisa sa Instagram.

I stalked him and I was surprised by her new feed. It was his hand with the engagement ring holding a large hand.

The veins that I already saw and touch was the hand on the pic. His tan complexion which I liked him more. I tapped his profile to watched her story and my tears rolled down when I saw Ace’s body lying on the bed with her right now. It was a a few minutes ago before it was posted.

Nanlulumo kong inalis ang app sa aking phone. I connect my GPS to Ace’s phone para makita kung saan siya pupunta at ganon din siya sa akin.

At nagulat ako nang makita ang location nito. Nasa building nila siya ngayon. Napakagat labi ako habang mariing ipinikit ang aking mga mata.

Masakit isiping nagsinungaling siya sa akin. Sinabi niyang pupuntahan niya ang mga magulang niya tapos ngayon ay makikita kong nasa condominium niya siya ngayon.

By Lisa’s story and feed, it was all saying that they are really together. Why did he lie to me?

I go to google and I was about to search when I saw on the ‘discover’ an article that indicates his picture wearing his formal attire with Lisa clung her hands-on experience Ace’s arm.

‘The only child hot bachelor of Ventura’s empire was now engaged to an also elite daughter of Senator Fuentes.’

and reading that title of the article is already breaking me.

I scroll more and read until I reached the end of the article. Hindi makapaniwala akong napailingling at napatingin sa kawalan.

I thought that our only problem now was the senator. But I got it wrong. Our relationship has been started and I think it’s gonna be ended earlier. The past literally brings itself, that I am scared of to happen.

As fast as we got back to each other, gano’n din naman kabilis masira. And the most painful part is that there is only one person who is always the cause of it all. Lisa always tear us apart.

Why would fate let us go back to each other if it’s still broke us again? I’m tired of crying and the heartache that I already have. I had so many problems that I do not know how can I resolved them.

I had made a lot of mistakes, so maybe this was one of my punishments now.

I may be a fire that can destroy whoever comes to me. But I was a fire who made to help people burned their needs and remove the memories they have from the people who left them aside.

I may be scared and innocent but I’m not that stupid. I am drowned by anger and fear that I almost lost myself.

I am seeking the justice and revenge that I wanted to happen that I almost forgot about myself. I forgot about my worth. I forgot about my safety. I forgot that there are more things I need to explore in this life.

I shut my eyes as I think of my Mom and Dad smiling at me proudly. But it was just only what I wanted to see.

I am now lost and I need to find and love myself first. I shut down my phone and put it on the side table.

I need to heal for myself, not for others. And if Ace was only meant to hurt me, I don’t think that it is our time to be together.

Kabanata 38

Kabanata 38

Company

Nasa hamba ako ng hagdan nang makita ko ang mga tauhan ni Ace na nakabantay sa buong paligid ng bahay niya. He is not here and he didn’t text me if he will come here for breakfast. Naabutan ko si Manang sa kusina na naghahanda ng aming almusal.

“Good morning po,” mahina kong bati sa kaniya.

Nakita naman niya akong umupo sa hapag at naniningkit ang mga matang nakatingin sa akin. When she noticed my stare on her she looked away.

“May aasikasuhin ka ba sa trabaho mo ngayon?” biglang aniya.

Then I remember what should I do this morning. I need to go to the office and talk to Mr. Alvaro. I’d been gone for almost a week. Hindi ko alam kung makakapasok pa ba ako pero titingnan ko kung anong pwede kong gawin.

I need this job and I won’t let this opportunity slid in my hands. I’m sure that I can explain to him and hopefully, he can accept my alibi.

“Papasok po ako ngayon sa trabaho.”

“Sinabi mo na ba ’yan kay Ace? Baka mapano ka kung aalis ka ng walang bantay, hija.”

Mabilis akong napaangat ng tingin kay Manang. It seems like it has a double meaning. I want to assume that it was about me attending to my office and not about what I felt last night.

I can’t explain this excruciating pain every time their articles and pictures that have been featured flash in my mind. I want to ask him but I’m scared to find out the truth. It’s real that the truth hurts. And I’m scared to be broken again.

“I will tell him po,”

I went out of the house with Ace’s man guarding me. Isa lang ang pinasama ko at ayaw kong pagtinginan ako ng mga ka officemate ko sa trabaho.

Hindi ko talaga ipinaalam kay Ace dahil kusa akong nagsama ng isang bodyguard at sinabihang huwag na nilang ipaalam kay Ace na aalis ako. I don’t want to disturb their intimate moment in his condo.

I went inside my office at may kinuhang mga gamit nang makarating ako ng opisina. I checked all my things at nakita ko namang lahat ay naroon pa. To think of it, I’m now curious if why they are not even contacted me after those several days I’d leave.

Pumasok ako ng elevator at tinungo ang opisina ni Mr. Alvaro sa top floor. He is sitting on his chair and looking outside the city when I entered inside his huge office.

I cleared my throat to get his attention. I didn’t fail, he turns around and surprisingly looked at me.

“W-What are you doing here? I mean how is your vacation?” He then asked that made my forehead creased.

Huh? I’m on my vacation?

“Sorry, for being incompetent in my job these past few days. Something happens and I didn’t intend to leave for almost a week. And… I’m not on my vacation.”

If Ace didn’t take me to his island this will not gonna happen. I am now explaining for the sake of my job. I’m good at this and I know that this is the only job that has a high maintenance fee for their employee.

I need my salary for my uncle’s therapy. But Ace ruined it all. I thought this will gonna be okay but I guess I’m wrong again.

“It’s okay, Ace told me what happen and you’re on leave. There is no need for your explanations. You can start your job now.” ’Yon lang at tumalikod na itong muli sa akin.

It’s weird to him that he didn’t invite me to have my seat. Tumalikod nalang rin ako at saka bumalik na ng opisina ko.

Pagkaupo ko sa aking opisina ay may nakita agad akong message sa phone ko. It was Ace.

Ace:

Where are you? Why you didn’t tell me you’re leaving? It’s not safe outside.

I can hear over the phone his baritone voice while scolding me through his message. He is always so bossy when it comes to our relationship. I liked it that way because he’s more mature than me but it was before. It all changed after I read the article last night.

He is hiding something from me. Is he lying or pretending to me? He said that there is nothing between them with Lisa before but how he can explain the pictures on Lisa’s story and posts.

It was lunch break nang makita ko si Ace na naglalakad papasok ng opisina. The employees were drooling at him. They can’t even take off their eyes on him. I was here at the front desk of my floor and my eyes immediately caught his way but I just ignored his presence.

May lumapit sa aking lalaking bago lang rin sa kompaniya at doon natuon ang atensyon ko.

“Ms. Cortez, ito na po ang mga papers na kailangan nyo pong pirmahan at ako na po ang magsasubmit para hindi na kayo mahirapan.” nakangiti ito nang inabot niya sa akin.

“Thank you,” I smiled at him. Napakamot siya sa kaniyang ulo at naiilang na tumingin sa akin.

“My name is Erick, nice to meet you Ms. Cortez.” inilahad nito ang kamay niya sa akin.

“Just call me Blair, it’s more convenient to my ears.” I was about to shake my hands with Erick when someone holds my hand.

“She’s girlfriend boy, back off.” mapagbanta ang tono ni Ace na nakalapit na sa amin ngayon.

“S-Sorry Mr. Ventura, I didn’t know that Ms. Cortez was your previous girlfriend. I thought you’re engaged to Ms. Fuentes.”

“What the heck Ace. What are you doing? Don’t scare Erick,” I whispered to him when I noticed the employee’s staring at us.

Inilagay niya ako sa kaniyang likod pero nagpumilit akong sa tabi niya lamang pumwesto habang kausap ang kinakabahang si Erick.

“Leave my girlfriend alone,” he then clenched his jaw. He said it in his normal tone but the threat was there.

I haven’t seen Ace this jealous over someone. And what he was doing, it makes me feel strange. He wasn’t like this.

I let a heavy sighed. Even Erick knows about the engagement and now I think he is confused. Tinalikuran ko nalang sila at saka dirediretsong pumasok sa loob ng opisina ko.

Napahawak ako sa aking ulo nang makaupo ako. Itinukod ko ang dalawa kong siko sa table at saka iniyuko ang aking mukha.

“I bring you food, let’s eat together.” I heard him said in front of my table. We’re now both here inside my office.

Hindi ko naramdamang pumasok siya ng opisina ko. Nananatili akong nakayuko at hindi siya pinapansin. Narinig ko pang may inilapag siya sa aking lamesa na nasa pagitan ng dalawang sofa ng office ko.

Umahon ako at nakita ko siyang inihahanda ang mga pagkain. Normal siyang umupo at tumingin sa gawi ko pagkaraan. He seems normal and not bothered by my actions. How could this man break my heart for several times? And what just he did outside my office earlier? He’s making a commotion because of me.

“You need to go to the Ventura Estates this one in the afternoon. We have to discuss the company of your Dad na nasa mga Fuentes ngayon.” he just said.

But when I heard what he said, it caught my attention. I looked at him. But then my curiousness about the company subside when I saw his face. I remember what I read last night. I remember Lisa’s engagement ring.

“Tell me, Ace, are you engaged to Lisa?” Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili kong magtanong.

I want to know the truth even it can break my heart. I badly want him to answer me with the word ’no. That’s all I am wishing right now.

He looked at me indulgently then he looked away later on that I didn’t get to know if why. Seeing him this way was a pain in me. Why he can’t answer me?

“Ace, I am asking you.” mariin nang tanong ko sa kaniya ngayon.

His lips parted. I stood up, hindi na makayanang marinig pa ang kaniyang sagot. How dare him lied to me. I assume that his silence means yes, and that’s a cue that he’s lying.

Lumapit ako at naupo sa kaniyang harapan sa sofa. I smiled painfully, the bitterness was only drawn in my lips. While him, he looked at me wearily. I gritted my teeth as I glanced at the food in front of us to get away from our stares.

“So it’s a yes. You really are engaged to her.” tumatango tango pang sabi ko sa kaniya na ani mong nakumpirma ko na iyon sa sarili ko mismo.

I can’tbelievee that we are here again in this part of our love story. Maybe we are really not meant for each other. We’re just destined to know each other but not for forever.

To learn from him and to grow as an individual. It’s hard to accept. I feel the anger and sadness that consumes me once again. I feel angry for him.

“Kelan ang kasal Ace? You know that I can’t go to your wedding. His father killed my parents at hindi ko masisikmurang pumunta.” I saw his jaw clenched as I narrowed my eyes on him when I said those words. His eyes were on the floor now, seems like he was taming himself.

“Are you helping them Ace? Huh? Kaya ba nakatakas ang hayop na Fuentes na iyon sa kulungan dahil ikaw ang tumulong?!” I was catching my breath as I fired him my accusations.

“Hindi ko ’yon magagawa Blair.” mariin niyang sinabi.

“Then who?! How could it happen? Unless someone powerful helped him out of the jail. Your family was influential so why wouldn’t doubt you?” tumayo ako mula sa pagkakaupo ko at saka hindi makapaniwala siyang pinagmasdan.

“Your words might trick me but I won’t let you this time,” I muttered sharply at him.

“I indeed love you, Blair. Don’t ever doubt it-”

“I don’t freaking care about the love you were saying that I never knew if it’s true. How can you say it, Ace? Kung totoo ‘yon e’ di sana hindi ka engaged kay Lisa ngayon. Stop tricking and fooling me, Ace.” I said in dismissive.

“I’m sorry,” that’s all he can say while his eyes were still not focused on me. What’s wrong with him?

The last time I remember back on the island is that he said that he wasn’t engaged with Lisa. And now, he just remains silent while I asked him about it it. Then suddenly he apologizes to me? I don’t get him. I just really don’t.

“I will go for the meeting after this lunch, right?” Tumalikod ako sa kaniya at naglakad sa likuran ng sofa para tanawin ang syudad sa likuran ng glass wall ng aking opisina.

Naramdaman ko pang tumulo ang aking luha at ayaw kong makita niya iyon.

“Yeah,” he said huskily at the back of me.

“Pupunta ako, you can leave my office now.” ani ko dahil hindi ko na makayanan pa ang gulo na namamayani sa aking isipan. Nalilito ako sa mga inaakto niya dahil kahapon lang naman ay maayos pa kami, tapos ngayon nagkakaganito na kami.

“Blair-”

“I said leave, Ace! Just leave!” my tears wearily fell to my cheeks as I heard his footsteps started to make them lead towards the doorway of my office.

Humarap lang ako sa kinauupan niya kanina nang marinig kong tuluyan na niyang maisara ang pintuan at makalabas na ng aking opisina. Tinungo ko ang harapan ng aking lamesa at saka sumandal sa aking table. I didn’t learn from my past. He just played me again for the sake of himself. Umiiling iling akong nagligpit ng mga gamit ko kalaunan.

I need to out early today. I fixed myself and put some makeup to hide my swollen eyes. Hindi ako pwedeng magmukhang kawawa pagdating ko sa kanilang opisina.

I should be looked fine. He’s engaged to Lisa anyway so I will do what I want now. He stopped me from taking my revenge and now that he’s not mine anymore. I won’t let him dictate me again.

I didn’t eat the food that Ace prepared on my visitor’s table earlier. Umalis na ako ng opisina at nag-abang ng taxi. Hindi ako sumakay ng sasakyan ni Ace kung nasaan ang kaniyang mga bodyguard na nagbabantay sa akin. I just want to get away from his hold now. Tutal si Lisa naman pala talaga kasi ang gusto niyang pakasalan.

Tinungo ko ang Ventura Estates. I was just in time nang dumating ako ron. At first, ay hindi ko maiwasang mapansin ang mga tinging iginagawad sa akin ng mga tao sa loob ng building habang naglalakad ako sa lobby patungong elevator.

I didn’t mind them and I just continue walking towards the elevator. I went in at may iilan akong nakasabay. I went out of the elevator eventually when I reached the right floor where the meeting will be held. Ace texted me earlier the details about it so I should know where will I go. As I walk to the floor there was a man who approached me.

“Ms. Cortez, let me lead you the way.” aniya.

Hindi naman na ako nagsalita pa at sumunod na ako. Marahil ay ipinadala ito ni Ace para sa akin. This meeting was about our old company. Hindi ko hahayaang mapunta ito sa kanila. Lalo na at alam ko na ngayon na si senator Fuentes pala ang may pakana ng lahat ng ito. Hindi ko hahayaang pati ang kumpanyang iniwan sa akin ng mga magulang ko ay mapunta sa kanila.

They ruined my life and I have to take back the things they once steal that I deserve to have. The man who is assisting me opens the large door of the conference room. I build my composure at taas noo kong natanaw ang mga taong nasa loob na nito ngayon. Tumambad sa akin ang mga pamilyar na tao sa loob.

At halos mangunot at mamilog ang mata ko nang humakbang ako at tuluyan nang makapasok sa loob. Hindi ako makapaniwalang tumingin kay Maica at Sean na ngayon ay magkatabi sa upuan.

It was the conference room and everyone here inside are familiar to me.

“Blair,” ani Maica at saka mabilis akong niyakap.

Lumapit din si Sean na ngayon ay seryosong nakatingin sa akin. He changed a lot. Pati rin si Maica. Ilang taon ko rin silang hindi nakita.

I’m happy to see them again. I smiled ang hugged Maica back. Gano’n din kay Sean. He’s tall like Ace and Sean’s physique was more built now.

“Hey Blair, we missed you so much.” ani Sean. Naiiyak at naguguluhan naman akong tumingin sa kanilang dalawa.

Ngayon ko lang napagtanto ang paglayo ng loob ko sa kanila matapos mangyari ng insidente sa aking mga magulang. Nagalit ako sa kanila at nagpanggap na maayos kami kahit na ang totoo ay hindi. I chose to blame them for not being there for me. Hindi ko inisip ang sitwasyon nila nang mga panahong iyon.

I lost years without them. I feel alone in all those years even the truth I have friends like them that I can call and count on but my ego and pride just can’t take to swallow it. At mas pinili ko silang iwasan at hindi tawagan.

“Blair, I need your hug too. Hindi pwedeng si Sean lang.” napatingin naman ako sa likuran nila Sean at nakitang si Clark iyon. Napangiti ako at saka niyakap din siya.

Masaya akong makita sila rito. Johnson was also here. Nakamasid lang sa amin habang nakangising nakaupo sa kaniyang upuan.

“You don’t know how much I’m happy to see you again Maica… Sean… Clark.” tiningnan ko sila isa isa at ang kaninang taas noo kong postura at para bang napalitan ng masaya at malambot kong pagkatao.

“Akala ko nga hindi ka magiging masaya na makita kami. Isipin mo Blair, ilang taon na ang lumipas pero hindi mo man lang kami sinipot sa mga hang out natin. Sa tingin mo ba hindi ko naramdaman yung naging pagbabago mo? Sinasakyan ko nalang kaya yung pagiging ipokrita mo, kung alam mo lang.” Maica said with her weary eyes now.

Naiiyak ko naman siyang niyakap muli. “I’m sorry Maica,”

Nanginginig naman ang boses niyang sumagot. “Okay lang ’yon Blair, naiintindihan ka namin. Pero sana kinausap mo kami. You can open up anytime, we’re best friends, right? If you felt that I left you before, it was because of my Dad but I won’t let him decide for myself anymore. Your my best friend kaya namiss talaga kita! But at the same time, I really feel bad about what happened before, I’m sorry Blair.”

“Sorry din, Maica if I hypocritically treated you guys. I was just drowned by my pain and anger.”

“We understand you, girl! Ano ka ba!” Aniya na naluluha na rin.

At kalaunan ay naiiyak at natatawa kami at the same time na tumingin sa isa’t isa nang humiwalay ako sa aming mahigpit na pagyayakapan.

“We have so much to talk about. You missed a lot of our meetings kaya hindi ka na updated.” Si Clark na nasa likuran ko na ngayon.

“Wanna meet my girlfriend, Blair?” biglang ani naman ni Sean sa tabi ni Clark.

Sinapak naman ni Clark ang braso nito.

“The fuck man, as if she’s interested.” ani Clark rito na para bang naiilang sa sinabi ni Sean dahil out of the topic iyong line niya.

“Tumahimik nga kayong dalawa. By the way, Blair let’s have a sit first.” hinila ako ni Maica patungo sa upuan na katabi ng sa kaniya.

Nagtataka naman akong tumingin sa kanila. I thought we’re going to have a meeting about my parent’s company. Ngunit natigil kami sa pag-uusap nang biglang pumasok si Lisa, kasunod nito si Ace na nasa tabi na niya ngayon na nagpatigil sa akin. May pumasok ding isa pang supistikadang ginang sa loob na mas nagpabigat ng hangin sa loob ng conference room na ito.

They have also their men at the back of them. And I was also surprised to see the three men in their corporate attires went inside as well. Hindi ko alam kung kabilang ba sila sa shareholders at stockholders ng kumpaniya o hindi.

We stood up and no one spoke. Katabi ko pa rin si Maica sa upuan at katabi niya si Sean at sa gilid naman niya ay si Clark at Johnson. I was like in front of the right side of the table.

We take our sit nang mag-uumpisa na kami. I took a glance at Ace’s way dahil kanina ko pa nararamdam ang kaniyang mga tingin sa akin.

He is sitting in front of me and beside her was Lisa. Nasa kabisera kami at walang imik sa isa’t isa.

“How are you pagkatapos mong malaman na engaged na pala kami ni Ace?” panimula si Lisa sa akin.

I gave her faked smile. “I’m good. Masaya ako at nagkatuluyan kayo.” I bitterly said in a low voice dahil nasa amin ngayon ang tingin ng lahat kahit na sila Johnson na nasa kabilang dulo ko.

Nakita kong seryosong nakatingin naman sa akin si Ace.

“Yeah, thank you. I’m so happy that he told you now. Ayaw ko na kasing lokohin ka pa niya. Alam ko ang pakiramdam ng masaktan. Kaya naiintindihan ko kung bitter ka para sa amin ngayon.” peke pa siyang tumawa pagkatapos.

I rolled my eyes at her. Nagtitimpi ko siyang tiningnan at saka nginitian ng nakakaloko.

“I’m not bitter though. And to be real, I just find your relationship pathetic. A guy who always pretending and not acing everyone was engaged to a scandalous and obsessed woman like you. Bagay na bagay kayo sa isa’t isa, Lisa. And I feel nothing for the both of you.” then I gave her a sweet smile.

Bumaling naman ako kay Ace. Then I saw his eyes narrowed on me. His glares were like a dagger on me. And I looked away when I can’t take his glares anymore.

“This meeting was called for the sake of our company.” ani ng ginang na nasa tabi ni Lisa. At napasin ko ang resemblance nilang dalawa.

Napatingin kaming lahat sa kaniya. At kalaunan ay dumapo sa akin ang tingin ng ginang at mataman akong tiningnan nito. I equaled her glares. I raised my one brow and not get fired by her glares at me.

“You might be the daughter of Beatrice and Clarence?” She then asked afterward.

I just nodded my head at her with my eyes in a sharp one staring at her.

“Your company was the pay for the debt of your parents. It was a long time ago but some of the papers were not signed by you. You should sign it all now para matapos na ang meeting na ito.”

Napakunot naman ang aking noo. What papers? I’m done signing all the documents back then the moment I decided to just flew our company away instead of our house.

“But it’s the Cortez Corporation, there is another way to pay the debt even it was a long time ago.” singit ni Maica.

Napatingin ako sa kaniya dahil sa sinabi niya. I want to get back our company. And I will go through the hole of the needle if I needed just to get it back from them.

“I won’t sign the papers.” mariin kong sinabi sa ginang kalaunan.

Napamaang naman akong tiningnan ng ginang.

“You’re was in debt, so you should sign it now or else you’ll be in jail.” She stated in a very dangerous way.

Peke naman akong natawa. “Your husband took everything that my parents have and I won’t let you take the company they build in this industry for me. It was for me and not for the monstrous people like you who killed them.” I said with conviction as the pain dripped on me.

“How dare you talk to me like that! Hindi ka ba naturuan ng magandang asal ng mga magulang mo bago sila mamatay?”

“So you expect me to respect you after you killed my parents? I’m not stupid Ma’am.” I fired.

Magsasalita pa sana ang ginang nang pigilan ito ni Lisa. Hinawakan niya ito sa braso.

“You have nothing now Blair so just give it up. Sign the papers dahil wala ka ng ibang paraan pa para mabayaran ang lahat ng utang mo sa amin.” Si Lisa naman ngayon ang nagsasalita.

“Hoy Lisa, totoo ngang kung ano ang puno ay siya ring bunga. You’re just like your father, masyadong ganid at makasarili.” ani Maica sa aking tabi.

“As a representative of the Arizobal Firm. Let’s know who is the real owner. My Dad let me decide here so better you investigate or I pulled out our twenty percent share in the company.” it was Johnson who spoke.

Natigilan naman ako sa sinabi niya.

“Investigate what? It’s now our company and the Cortez’s have nothing to do with it. They had no rights in this company a long time ago.” Lisa said. Bakas ang irita sa mukha ng mag-ina na nakatunghay sa akin ngayon.

Napatingin naman ako sa gawi ni Ace na ngayon ay tahimik lang na nakamasid sa amin. Mas mabuti ng tahimik siya at baka kampihan lang niya ang mag-inang ito sa oras na ibuka niya ang kaniyang bibig.

Lisa looked at him like she was a cadger for some help.

“Hindi ito maaari! Matagal na niyang napirmahan ang ilang kontrata at may patunay kami na sa amin itong kumpanya!” ani ng ginang.

“Uh-oh, Mrs. Fuentes baka kainin ninyo ang lahat ng sinabi niyo.” Clark said annoyingly.

“Ace! Tell them that we will pulled out their shares if they will not shut up. What they are doing was under the law-” Lisa was cut off.

“What you are doing is under the law, Lisa.” mariing ani Ace sa kaniya. Lumingon siya sa mag-ina at saka mariing tiningnan.

Tumingin sa akin si Lisa at masama at matalim ang mga mata nitong dumapo sa akin. I get the bottle of water in front of me and opened it.

“Do you really think Ace would love you after this-”

Ibinuhos ko na sa mukha nito ang tubig nang hindi na ako nakapagtimpi pa. I stood up at inubos ang lahat ng laman ng tubig ng bote sa kaniyang pagmumukha.

“Ah, o-oh my god, what the hell!” Lisa screamed. Basang basa na ang kaniyang buhok at damit dahil sa tubig na ipinaligo ko sa kaniya.

“Ano? Malamig na ba ’yang ulo mo at nahimasmasan na sa mga pinagsasasabi mo? Or I will get a cup of coffee for you to wake up?” I fired to her mockingly.

Her eyes were shocked as she glared at me now. Then she irritatedly stood up in a sudden. I crossed my arms and glared at her, raised brows.

“Sumusobra ka na talaga-”

“No. Ikaw ang sumusobra. Wake up Lisa, Ace will never be yours because he. is. mine. And you are just daydreaming. How pathetic and such a loser like you.” I  fired on her now.

Naluluha at namumula ang mga mata nitong matalim na tumititig sa akin. Ang kaniyang ina naman na nasa kaniyang tabi ay hindi makapaniwalang nakatingin sa akin. Matalim ang mga tingin nito sa akin bago niya dinaluhan ng anak.

I smirked and looked at them ruthlessly. Kulang pa iyan sa ginawa ninyo sa mga magulang ko. Walang wala pa iyan kung tutuusin.

“Anong karapatan mong ganituhin ang anak ko? I will call the guards.” aniya at tumingin sa nakatayong lalaki na mukhang tauhan nila.

“I just serving your daughter right cause she’s a fucking slut and whore.” I said to her darkly as I took my step near them.

“How dare you say that in front of me!” akmang sasampalin ako ng ginang nang biglang may humawak sa braso nito.

I stopped and looked at that hand who held it. I took a glance and saw his anger. Ace’s eyes were dark as his jaw clenched. Gritting his teeth, controlling his anger. Nakakatakot ang kaniyang mga tingin ngayon.

“My girlfriend doesn’t deserve your filthy hand and no one else. Walang pwedeng manakit sa kaniya at walang kahit na sino ang makakagawa no’n dito mismo sa harapan ko. It would be a pleasure to me if I take you on the jail, now.” Ace said gravely with his deep large voice.

At mabilis naman kaming lahat na napatingin sa pinto nang makita naming bumukas iyon. Nagugulat akong napatayo ng tuwid nanh makita ang matandang lalaki na nakaupo sa wheelchair na tulak tulak ni Bench. Pulos puti na ang buhok nito at kita na ang sobrang katandaan.

“This is Attorney Bermudez, the Cortez’s family lawyer. He handed everything you don’t have Mrs. Fuentes, including the paper that you want Blair to sign. It was signed by his father and mother. And their family lawyer has the evidence that can proved that the Cortez’s doesn’t have any debt on Fuentes family.” mariin at matamang sinabi ni Ace habang ipinapakita nito ang hawak na envelop ngayon sa ginang.

He open it and gave to me the real copies of the ownership of my parents company. Nanginginig ang mga kamay ko sa mga oras na ito habang binuksan ko ang envelop at binasa ang nasa loob nito.

“May kasunduan tayo Ace! Hindi mo pwedeng gawin sa amin ’to!” Lisa’s mother screamed.

“You know what will happen Ace kapag pinagpatuloy mo ito. One call away and your family will die.” pananakot ni Lisa.

Mabilis naman akong napaangat ng tingin kay Ace nang marinig ko ang sinabi ni Lisa.

What? His family was in danger? Kaya ba niya hindi sinasabi sa akin ang dahilan kung anong mayroon sa kanila ni Lisa? That bitch trapped my boyfriend!

Ngunit natigilan naman ako nang makita kong ngumisi si Ace at saka tumingin sa pinto. Namamangha akong napatingin kay madame Helena at Don Denver na pumasok ng conference room ngayon.

Diretso ang lakad ni Madame patungo sa gawi ng mag-inang wala ng kawala ngayon. Umalingawngaw ang malakas na mag-asawang sampal ni Madame Helena na iginawad niya kay Lisa at sa ina nito.

“Your actions have their own consequences. And that slap was not enough. Mabuting alam ninyo kung saan kayo lulugar.” Ace’s mom’s words to them.

Naluluha at namumula ang pisngi ni Lisa na tumingin kay Ace.

“Ace, please… Ace,”

Matunog na sampal muli ang iginawad ng ina ni Ace sa kaniya.

“Don’t you ever call my son. You dirty pathetic daughter of a bitch.” It was Madame again.

“How dare you call my daughter-”

“You are under arrest Mrs. Fuentes and your daughter Lisa Fuentes for attempted homicide and kidnapping.”

“Ano ’to! Don’t touch me! Ah! Let me go!” pagpupumiglas ng ina ni Lisa nang mabikis silang nilapitan at pinosasan ng mga pulis.

Si Lisa naman ay masamang nakatingin sa akin habang ang luha ay dumadaloy sa kaniyang mga pisngi.

“Matagal na rin ng huli tayong nagkita Blair, naaalala mo pa ba ako?” Naalis lang ang tingin ko sa kanila nang marinig ko ang tanong sa aking ng matandang ginoo.

I snapped out and turned my gaze to the attorney who helped my family up until now. Naluluha akong lumapit kay attorney Bermudez.

“Opo, I still remember you attorney Bermudez. Ipinakilala kayo sa akin ni Daddy noon bago sila mamaalam. Bakit ngayon lang po kayo dumating?” Umiiyak ko ng tanong sa kaniya.

Naramdaman ko namang nakaalalay sa akin si Maica sa likuran.

“Matanda na ako at kinailangan kong magpagamot sa ibang bansa. At nang taong pumanaw ang iyong mga magulang ay hindi pa ako lubusang gumagaling no’n. Huwag kang mag-alala hija, naisagawa ko ang lahat ng hiling ng iyong ama. Your mother and father has a lot of properties and assets that is now under your name. You’re over age and you reached the age limit before you get what is really for you.” he said it as he held my hand.

Niyakap ko siya dahil sa tuwa at maluwang na pakiramdam ko ngayon. Ang buong akala ko ay tuluyan ng naubos ang mga ari ariang iniwan sa akin ng mga magulang ko. I thought it was now all gone and hearing him say this makes my heart flinched in prosperity.

“Thank you…thank you so much attorney.” umahon ako mula sa pagkakahawak kay attorney Bermudez at nakita ko si Ace na nakatingin sa akin.

“Your company is now back.” he said indulgently serious on me.

“Thank you,” ginawa niya ang lahat ng ito at sobrang saya ang nararamdaman ko.

But I was stunned when Ace walked away. Nagugulat akong tumingin sa kaniyang paalis na ngayon. What’s wrong with him again? He just walk away at hindi na kami nilingon pa. I was about to go and follow him when my eyes caught Lisa and her mom were now out of the conference room.

Nagitla rin ako nang marinig ang pamilyar na boses kanina.

“You must be Blair,” ani ng isang sopistikadang boses mula sa aking likuran.

Nagugulat akong marahang hinarap ang gawi ng ina ni Ace. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang mararamdaman at gagawin ko sa mga oras na ito.

Nahihiya akong humarap sa kaniya dahil alam ko sa aking sarili ang lahat ng ginawa ko sa kanilang pamilya. And I don’t have the guts to face her because of that.

“You looked beautiful as ever. I can see that you changed a lot. Hindi ka naman na mahiyain ngayon hindi ba?” she said. She’s not smiling, she said it in her normal manner.

Kinabahan agad ako. Kung ano ang naramdaman ko nung unang beses na makita ko siya sa kaniyang enggrandeng kaarawan noong ako’y bata pa ay gano’n pa rin hanggang ngayon.

Her sophisticated and intimidating air that Ace got from her has still there. Kung nakausap ko siya ng mga panahong akala ko ay ang mga Ventura ang may kasalanan ng lahat ng ito ay may lakas ako ng loob. But now it’s different, I’m at fault and I need to apologize.

“I am really sorry Madame. I was the person who scared and almost ruined your hotel.”

Ngunit nabigla ako nang hawakan niya ako sa kamay at nakangiting tiningnan sa mga mata.

“I understand. Ace told me everything. Ang gusto ko lang na gawin mo ay kausapin mo ngayon si Ace. You don’t know how devastated he was before.”

“M-Madame,” I suttered as I glance at her wearily.

Binitiwan niya ang kamay ko at saka ako iniwan na. Tiningnan pa ako ng ama ni Ace at saka tinanguan kalaunan.

Naguguluhan at hindi maintindihan ang sitwasyon namin ni Ace ngayon. My company is now back again. But the senator was still not in jail.

Siya na lang ang problema ko at magagawa ko lang na maipakulong siya sa tulong ni Ace. He saved and protect me from all of these. I doubted his love for me and I know now that it’s unfair. I haven’t even told him that I love him. Maybe he thinks that what I said to Lisa earlier was real. I was just saying it to make Lisa bitter and annoyed by my thoughts.

I need to find him. I need to talk to him. I need to tell that I loved him.

“Maica samahan mo ako. Kailangan kong hanapin si Ace.” Mayamaya ay ani ko kay Maica na nasa aking likuran.

Kabanata 39

Kabanata 39

Killer

“Nasaan na ba kasi si Ace? Bakit kailangan pa natin siyang hanapin? Have you tried calling him?” tanong ni Maica habang papasok kami ng elevator.

I was preoccupied that I don’t even know what I’m doing.

“Blair! Dito!” she shouted for me to hear.

Pumasok na kami ng elevator habang hinahalungkat ko ang mga gamit ko. I get my phone and hastily tap my contacts.

I searched for his name at nang makita ko ay agad ko siyang tinawagan. His phone is ringing but he’s not answering it. I hurt him again and my trust was a blur. I need to apologize and say that I loved him too. He shouldn’t be out or going anywhere. I need to talk to him.

“Ace answer the call, please.” And I paused, my brows furrowed suddenly. He hangs up my call!

What will I do? Mabilis akong napatingin sa aking phone nang makita kong may message ro’n. I didn’t read it dahil hindi naman si Ace iyon. It was just an unknown number.

“Ano Blair sumagot na ba? Baka nasa office niya siya.” Maica suggested.

I frowned, “He’s not there.” malungkot at nakayuko kong ani.

The elevator opened and we went out. I was shocked at first when I found the people here in the lobby were so busy. The building was their company and it’s not their hotel.

Napalingon lingon pa ako sa mataong paligid at nang makita ko ang lalaking madalas na sumusundo sa akin sa elevator ay agad ko itong nilapitan.

Si Maica naman ay nasa likuran ko lang at busy rin sa pagkakalikot ng kaniyang phone.

“Nasaan si Ace?” diretsa kong tanong sa lalaki. I am sure that he is his secretary.

Tumingin sa akin ang lalaki.

“Miss Cortez, umalis po si Mr. Ventura.” animong kinakabahan pa ito.

“Saan siya nagpunta?”

“Hindi po pinasabi ni Mr. Ventura, basta nalang po siya umalis dahil wala na rin naman pong appointment na nag-aabang sa kaniya ngayon sa opisina.”

“Wala ka bang ideya kung saan siya pwedeng pumunta?” singit ni Maica sa aking tabi.

“I have no idea kung saan siya maaaring pumunta. Mauna na po ako Ms. Cortez,” paalam na ng sekretarya ni Ace.

Tinanguan ko lang siya at pagod ang mga mata kong tinanaw muli ang paligid.

“Huh? Eh, nasaan na daw? Anong nangyari? I’m here at the lobby. Bumaba ka na at hihintayin kitang bumaba. Sabay na tayong pumunta sa inyo.” narinig kong pagkausap ni Maica sa kabilang linya.

“I need to go Blair, pasensya na at may emergency sa bahay ngayon. Just give me a call kapag nakita mo na si Ace.”

Tiningnan ko siya at saka malungkot na nginitian. Then she hugged me tightly.

“Thank you Maica sa pagpunta. Salamat sa inyo nila Sean.”

She gave me a warm smile that she always gave me before. She’s always true and I thought we will never be the same again. And I was wrong. Because in the first place, I’m the one who made a mistake. I draw an invisible line to us after my parents died. That happens to be the gap between all of us.

“I’m really happy that you are back. Ikaw na talaga ’yan. Yung Blair na kaibigan namin. I missed you so much. Catch up tayo next time ah, tell me about Ace.” nangingiti na para bang nang-aasar akong tiningnan. Malisosya niya pa akong tinapik bago ako binigyan ng isang mahigpit na yakap muli.

Back then, I felt I was alone. I feel like they were all left me at the end. And the worst thing is that I have to stop myself from trusting someone.

“Sure Maica, let’s hang out next time. I missed you so much!” she removed herself and held my shoulders.

She chuckled before she looked at me seriously. She matured and I can say that she’s the old Maica but something has changed. She’s good at hiding her feelings kaya hindi ko rin masabi iyon.

“Okay, okay. Bago ’yon, hanapin mo muna yung boyfriend mong nawawala! Sigi ka at nawala na nga si Lisa sa landas niyo tsaka mo pa siya hahayaang mawala. Hala ka, bilisan mo at baka mahuli ka.” makahulugang aniya.

Nanliit naman ang mga mata kong tumingin sa kaniya. Why I found her suspicious? Did she know something I didn’t know?

“Anong ibig mong sabihin?”

“Wala! I just want you to be with him. You both deserve each other. Find him bago pa mahuli ang lahat.” nakita kong dumaan ang lungkot sa kaniyang mga mata na mabilis ding napalitan ng saya.

I smiled at her. “Maica, kailangan na talaga natin ng catch up. I can see that you have a problem.” mahinang ani ko.

Nagugulat niya pa akong tiningnan.

“A-Ano ka ba naman Blair! I’m fine okay? Thank you. Hanapin mo na si Ace ngayon. I gotta go.”

Nakita kong palapit sa amin sila Sean, Johnson at Clark mula sa kakabukas lang na elevator. Napangiti ako nang makita kong nagbago na rin sila.

“Paano ba ’yan Blair nawawala ang babe mo?” asik ni Johnson sa akin.

Sinamaan ko naman siya ng tingin. We’ve been closed to each other unlike Sean, Maica, and Clark.

“Well, you should find him.” suhestyon ni Sean sa harapan ko.

“Wow, you are not that jealous now huh? Dati lang ay ayaw mo kay Ventura dahil karibal mo. Tunay ngang nag-iiba ang ihip ng hangin” patuya ni Clark.

Natawa naman si Johnson at nakita kong lumapit sa akin si Maica.

“Alis na kami, let’s meet each other again, okay?” tumalikod na siya at mag-uumpisa ng maglakad nang bigla niya akong harapin muli.

“Oh I forgot, give me your number.”

Napangiti naman ako at saka iniabot sa kaniya ang aking cellphone. She typed in her number to my phone and she also did the same on her phone. Hindi ko kasi gaanong memoryado ang aking cellphobe number kaya siya na ang nag-ayos.

She waved her hand to me after. Gano’n din si Sean at Clark. Kinawayan ko rin sila at saka hinarap si Johnson na nananatiling nakatayo sa aking tabi.

Seryoso siya nang tiningnan ko. Napakunot ang noo ko at saka hinarap siya ng maayos.

“Hindi pa rin nahuhuli ang tunay na pumatay sa mga magulang mo Blair. Kailangan mong mag-ingat.” He then seriously said to me.

“Alam ko, pero wala akong seguridad ngayon. At hindi ko pa mahanap kung nasaan si Ace.” I worriedly said.

“Don’t worry about him that much, he can handle himself if he is in trouble. Sumama ka muna sa akin at ihahatid na muna kita sa inyo.”

Mahina pa muna akong napabuntong-hininga at saka kalaunan ay nanlulumo akong sumunod sa kaniya patungong basement kung saan siya nakapark.

“What will you do now to your company? Nasa iyo na ito ngayon at ikaw talaga ang dapat na magmana niyon dahil sa mga magulang mo ito,” he said as he started the engine.

He also handed me the envelope of the documents I left inside the conference room when I walk out to find Ace.

“Gagawin ko ang trabaho ko. Kailangan kong tingnan ang lahat ng kailangan kong aralin tungkol sa kumpaniya. I prepared myself for this for a very long time ago dahil balak ko talagang bawiin ang kumpanyang pinaghirapan ng mga magulang kong itaguyod.”

“Good, seems that you have a great mindset ahead, Blair.” He said like he’s teasing me.

Nangunot ang aking noo at saka nakataas ang isang kilay ko siyang tiningnan habang nagmamaneho siya.

“Ano na naman?” naiirita kong tanong kay Johnson.

“Hmm, you’re not that Blair who only wants is to take her revenge anymore. I’m happy that you’re going back to the old same but with the change of progress of the circumstances that life brought to you.”

Napigisi naman ako. Then I thought about Ace. He was one of the reasons why I changed and now he’s the reason why I became myself again. Nararamdaman kong unti unti nang nawawala yung bigat na pasan pasan ko sa aking dibdib. I take it for so many years and now it slowly becomes lightly. And it’s because of Ace.

“Salamat sa paghatid.” ani ko pagbukas ko ng pinto ng kaniyang sasakyan.

He smiled boyishly, “Mm, the bodyguards of the Ventura’s are all there in the house kaya huwag na kayong mag-alala. Mauuna na ako,” paalam na sa akin ni Johnson kalaunan.

I just nodded and proceed to Ace’s house. Hindi pa rin kami lumilipat ng bahay at nananatiling sa bahay pa rin kami ni Ace nakatira.

“Blair! Kumusta ang trabaho?” Bungad na tanong ni Manang sa akin pagkapasok na pagkapasok ko pa lang ng bahay.

Nakabantay ang mga bodyguards ni Ace sa loob at labas ng bahay. Sinuyod ng aking tingin ang paligid at nagbabakasakaling baka nandito siya.

“Mabuti naman po Manang. May maganda po akong balita.” iginiya ko siya sa sofa para makaupo kami.

Wala si Ace dito at kaming dalawa lang ni Manang at ang iilan naming bodyguards na nasa loob ng bahay.

“Naibalik na po sa atin ang kumpanya.” naiiyak ko pang ani.

Nagugulat naman siyang tumingin sa akin. Nauna pa siyang naluha sa akin at hindi na napigilan dahil sa sobrang ligayang nadarama ng sabihin ko iyon ay tuluyan na rin siyang naiyak.

“Totoo ba ’yan hija? Mabuti kung gano’n at mapapangalagaan mo na ngayon ang kumpanyang iniwan sa iyo ng mga magulang mo. Masaya ako at naibalik na ito sa iyo.” naiiyak na ani manang Soling.

“Opo Manang, at hindi ko sila bibiguin.”

“Paano nga pala iyon nangyare? Hindi ba’t nasa lintik na mga Fuentes na iyon ang kumpaniya natin? Paanong naibalik itong muli?”

Ikinuwento ko kay Manang ang nangyari sa opisina kanina kasama ang mga Fuentes, maliban kay senator na hanggang ngayon ay patuloy pa ring pinaghahanap. Hindi naman makapaniwala si Manang nang matapos kong sabihin ang lahat sa kaniya. Maging siya ay natuwa at naluhang muli sa nalamang balita.

“Bakit ko ba nakalimutan si Attorney Bermudez noon? Dala na siguro ng katandaan pero salamat sa diyos at maayos na ngayon ang lagay niya at nakabalik na siya ng bansa. Si Ace ba ang may gawa ng lahat ng ito, hija? Nasaan nga pala siya at bakit hindi pa nagpupunta rito simula kaninang umaga?”

Napatingin naman ako sa ibaba. Hindi ko alam kung nasaan siya ngayon at marahil nasaktan ko siya ng lubos.

Gusto ko na siyang makita at makausap.

“Hindi ko na po siya nakita at nakausap matapos ang conference namin kanina Manang.” malungkot kong sabi.

Naramdaman ko namang hawakan niya ang buhok ko at marahan itong sinuklay gamit ng kaniyang mga daliri.

“Naalala mo pa ba noong bata ka? Kumakanta ka noon ng awiting hilig ko. Siguro ay nakalimutan mo na iyon pero gusto kong sabihin sa’yo ngayon kung bakit ko nagustuhan ang kantang iyon.” nakangiting sinabi ni amanang.

I still remember it. The day that I was so bored, so I sat on our couch vertically and sang.

“May tao na rin akong minahal noon. Marahil ay nagtataka ka kung bakit ako tumandang dalaga. Minahal ko siya at sinuklian niya rin ang pagmamahal ko ng higit pa. Marami akong pagkakamali pero napatawad pa rin niya ako. Hanggang sa dumating ang araw na hindi na kami muling nagkita pa.” naging malungkot ang huling salitang sinabi ni Manang.

“Ano po bang nangyari, Manang? Paanong hindi na kayo nagkitang muli?” kuryoso kong tanong.

“Wala na siya Blair. Masaya siya bago niya lisanin ang mundo. Naging malungkot ako at sobra akong napag-isa. Binalot ako ng lungkot. Hanggang sa napagtanto kong hindi naman dapat ako maging malungkot. Wala akong pinagsisihan sa lahat ng mga nangyari, na minahal ko siya. Kung mayroon man akong pinagsisisihan ’yon ay ang hindi pagpaparamdam ng pagmamahal ko sa kaniya. Kung sana ay nung una palang ay pinaramdam ko na sa kaniya, e’di sana, hindi na sana ako manghihinayang sa mga panahong sinayang ko.” mapait na ngumiti sa akin si Manang.

Ngayon ay naiintindihan ko na kung bakit siya mag-isa. I felt sad for her. But I’m happy that she’s with me and she never left me. Hinawakan niya ang dalawa kong kamay at saka ako tiningnan sa mga mata ng tuwid.

“Iparamdam at sabihin mo sa taong mahal mo na gusto mo siya, Blair. Dahil hindi natin alam kung kelan mawawala ang mga taong mahal natin sa buhay. Nangyayari nalang iyon sa hindi inaasahang pangyayari.”

Naging mabilis at mabigat ang kabog ng dibdib ko. Kinakabahan akong tumingin kay Manang. Nginitian niya ako bago siya tumayo at iwan akong mag-isa sa sofa at saka siya nagtungo ng kusina para ihanda ang aming gabihan.

I put my hand on my chest and feel my heartbeat. It was fast and loud. It was strange because it wasn’t an ovelwhelming and happiness feeling.

I hold my phone and see the picture that Ace took. It was a selfie picture of him. He set it as my home and lock screen wallpaper when he was at the cyberzone buying this phone. I changed it last night but I put it back again.

Hindi ko alam kung paano ako nakakain ng maayos at nakapaglinis ng sarili nang gabing iyon. Nahiga ako sa aking kama at tumingin sa kisame. I can’t stop thinking about Ace. He was so showy about his feeling towards me. He never failed me. He always give his all when it comes to me.

And all I did was to doubt him. His family forgive me which I can’t believe that they understand me. They have a big heart that can accept me for who I am. They forgive me because they understand me.

Kailangan ko iyong suklian. I want to love him and to be with him all the time. I already missed his smell, his husky and deep baritone voice. I missed seeing him. I missed his touch. I really missed him so much.

I woke up early the next day. I stood up and start fixing myself. I decided to go to the office first this morning dahil kailangan kong kausapin si Mr. Alvaro. At pagkatapos ay pupunta ako ng Ventura building to do my job there.

My company was under them and the main office was also in their building. I don’t know how does that happens but I find it convenient for now, dahil hindi pa rin nahuhuli si senator.

Bago ako umalis ng bahay ay nakausap ko pa muna ang iilang pulis na nagiimbestiga at naghahanap kay senator Fuentes. They updated me about their investigation and their ideas and possibilities that the senator’s whereabouts and they will find him immediately.

Hindi ko pa rin ma-contact si Ace hanggang ngayon. I even texted him but he didn’t reply. Bumaba ako ng sasakyang ipinahiram ni Ace sa akin noong nakaraan nang nasa harapan na ako ng building ni Mr. Alvaro. May dalawang bodyguards na magbabantay din sa akin ngayon. Hindi rin nila ako hinahayaang magmaneho.

“Mr. Alvaro,” I called him when I got into his office. He rosed up from his seat at nakangiti akong tiningnan.

“The Cortez’s heiress is here. I can’t believe that the owner of the Cortez firm is currently working at my office. Kaya pala iba ka at masasabi kong tunay na epektibo pagdating sa negosyo.” Seryoso pero may ngiting nakaguhit sa kaniyang mga labi.

I take that as a compliment. I smiled and walk towards in front of his table. I am happy that after all what happened he was still the same. He always treat me better from the very beginning.

“Thank you for accepting me here in your company nang mga panahong wala pa akong ibang mapasukang kumpaniya. You treat and gave my salary very well. I’m happy and glad that I meet you, Mr. Alvaro.” I genuinely said at him.

“It’s my pleasure to meet and worked with you too.” he smiled then lend his hand. I took his hand and we smiled at each other while we shook our hands.

Wala naman akong naging kalapit na empleyado sa aking opisina pero lahat sila ay hindi makapaniwala na isa akong may-ari na ng kumpanya ngayon. Lahat sila ay binabati ako at ang iba naman ay narinig kong nalaman na nila na ako ang anak ng mag-asawang Cortez.

Umalis na ako ng opisina nang may maramdan akong nakamasid sa akin. Hindi iyon ang mga taong nakatingin sa akin na mga empleyado dahil iba ang pakiramdam ko rito. I used to feel them stare towards me kaya alam ko kung iba ang tingin ng sumusunod sa akin.

Papunta na ako ng parking lot nang maramdaman kong may sumusunod talaga sa akin. Magtatanghali na at sikat ang araw. I heard hasty footsteps towards me. Kinakabahan akong luminga-linga sa paligid sa tuwing mararamdaman kong malapit lang iyon sa akin.

Wala akong nakitang tao na nandito maliban sa akin. Malapit na ako sa sasakyan nang mapansing wala roon ang mga bodyguards ko. Napahinto akong muli nang may maramdaman akong yabag sa aking likuran. Kitang kita ko ang anino nito mula sa sinag ng araw. He was huge and as time goes on it gets closer and closer to me.

I swalowed hard. I was about to run when he suddenly grip my wrist. I struggled and shouted for help. He quickly covered my mouth and I felt him bring his mouth close to my ear.

“Huwag kang magtangkang gumawa ng ingay kung ayaw mong mamatay dito,” he whispered darkly in my ears.

Then I felt sharp cold steel that is now pointed at my lower side of my abdomen. It was a knife and I was afraid of what he might do to me so I kept quiet.

“A-Anong kailangan niyo sa akin. Who are you?” natatakot kong tanong. Nanginginig ang aking mga labi at gayundin ang aking mga tuhod.

I know how to protect myself before but I was afraid right now. Hindi ko alam kung dahil sa patalim na nakatutok sa akin ngayon o dahil wala na akong lakas nang loob kagaya ng dati.

Kinaladkad niya ako sa malapit na sasakyan. Hindi siya nagsalita at pabagsak niya ako ipinasok sa loob. And when he entered, he immediately aimed a knife at me. I tearfully closed my eyes tightly because I thought it will stab me.

Pero kalaunan ay marahan kong iminulat ang aking mga mata nang marinig ko siyang nagsalita at tumingin ako sa kaniya. Natigilan at nagitla ako nang mamukhaan ko siya.

Senator Fuentes is now here in front of me, pointed a sharp knife on my neck. I quickly felt angry when I recognize him.

“Walang hiya kang hayop ka! You’re evil and you deserve to be rot in hell! You killed my parents and now you’re trying to escape?” nanginginig ang mga labi ko sa sobrang galit na nararamdaman habang nakatingala dahil sa punyal niyang nakadikit at konting diin niya lang ay siyang lalaslas sa aking leeg.

Mariin niya pa akong tiningnan bago siya magsalita. His eyes are deep as if lacking from sleep. His face also thinned and slightly sagged. His eyes are red while he staring at me.

Mukha siyang matandang nag-aadik sa sitwasyon niya ngayon. At nagulat ako nang pahisterya siyang tumawa.

“Sa tingin mo ba talaga hindi ako gaganti sa mga ginawa ng pamilya mo sa akin? At ngayon pati ang anak at asawa ko ay ipapakulong mo pa? We should be fair. I won’t let you be happy after you ruined my career and my family.”

I gritted my teeth. Where is he getting his guts to say this to me?

“How could you say this after you killed my parents?! Ikaw ang unang nanira ng buhay at pamilya! Hindi ako!”

“Your family ruined me first! Gumaganti lang ako.”

He then covered my mouth. I shouted and tried to pushed him but he was so strong.

Hindi ko na namalayan at nawalan na ako ng malay pagkaraan. I smell something at the handkerchief that makes me out of my consciousness. At nang idilat ko ang aking mga mata ay bahagyang nanlabo ang aking paningin. Napapapikit ako sa sakit ng ulo ko. Masakit rin ang kamay at binti ko. I looked at my body at nakitang nakatali ako ngayon.

Ngunit mas lalong nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang mapansing nakalutang ako sa ere. My lips parted and I am now catching my breath. I was high from the ground.

Nakatali ang kamay ko paitaas at masakit na ang braso ko sa sobrang pagkakangalay. I can’t even feel my blood flowing in there that it’s now getting numb.

“Tulong!” paulit ulit kong sigaw para humingi ng saklolo sa paligid.

I roamed my eyes and noticed that I am at the abandoned building.

“Gising ka na pala, Blair. Nasaan na nga ba tayo kanina?” I heard Senator creepy voice down there. He was sitting in the chair. He laughed crazily then looked at me intently. I equaled his glared.

“You will pay for this! Ace is on his way now for sure.”

“Iniisip mo talagang pupuntahan ka rito ni Ace?” nagugulat akong napatingin sa kabilang gawi ko nang may marinig pa akong isang boses do’n.

Then my eyes widen when I saw Lisa walking towards me.

“Hindi ka na niya pupuntahan Blair dahil magkikita kami ngayon. Kaya huwag kang umasa na may sasaklolo sa’yo dito. If you think that you got everything back, nagkakamali ka.” umiiling iling pang aniya.

My lips parted and shrugged. My shoulder were getting hurt now in pain of the ropes in my hand. 

“Hindi ’yan totoo! I know that you envied me because of Ace’s attention to me and now that I got him you get hurt. Matuto kang makuntento sa meron ka, Lisa. Hindi lahat ng gusto mo ay gugustuhin ka. Learned to accept what you have and be contented to it. Because if you’re not, you can destroy your own self.”

“I don’t care! It’s all your fault Blair! If you didn’t flirt with him before this will not gonna happen!” she screamed insanely.

Napangisi ako at nang-aasar siyang tiningnan kahit nananakit na ang aking katawan mula sa pagkakatali.

“You can never see yourself to others. Find your own worth, Lisa. Ace is not for you, so let go.” I grunted at her but then I immediately screamed in pain after that.

“Ahhh! B-Bitiwan mo ’yan Lisa!” naluluhang ani ko sa sobrang sakit.

Hinila ni Lisa ang lubid paitaas. Dahilan para mas tumaas ang pagkakatali sa akin ngayon sa ere at masakit na ang kamay at braso ko.

“Bye Blair, your advice was more convenient to you. Apply it to yourself after you die here.” She evilly said then she went out.

“Who killed your parents again Blair?” biglang tanong naman sa akin ni Senator nang makalabas ang kaniyang anak.

Nanghihina akong tumingin sa kaniya sa ibaba ko. Laylay na ang aking ulo at sobra ng sakit ng aking mga balikat.

“You killed them and you-”

“I didn’t kill them hija, gusto mo bang makita ang totoong taong pumatay sa mga magulang mo?” tumayo siya mula sa kaniyang pagkakaupo.

Nalilito ko siyang pinanood papunta sa akin.

“Lumabas ka na at magpakita ka sa Ma’am Blair mo…”

Mabilis akong napalingon sa lalaking pumasok at namilog ang aking mga mata nang makita kung sino iyon.

“Denis,” Hindi ako makapaniwalang tiningnan siyang marahang naglalakad patungo sa gawi ni Senator Fuentes.

Mariin at seryosong nakatingin sa akin si Denis ngayon nang harapin niya ako. Ibang iba sa maamo at masunurin niyang mga tingin sa akin noon.

“Paano mo nagawa ito sa amin? Pinlano mo ba ito simula pa lang, huh?! Niloko mo kami ni Uncle, Denis! You helped me planned to take my vengeance to the Ventura but the truth is you wanted to destroy them!” masama akong tumingin kay senator kahit na pagod na ang aking katawan. “Gusto niyo ring sirain ang mga Ventura gaya ng ginawa niyo sa mga magulang ko, hindi ba? You used me! You used my anger towards them para makapaghiganti kayo sa kanila.” I fired to them with all my strength.

My tears are falling now and I can’t stop myself from sobbing. They all used me. At ang mga taong iniwasan at pinaghigantihan ko ay ang mga taong kakampi ko.

I was doomed. It was all because of me. I made it all complicated and I’m the one to blame.

I wish Ace is here to hug and save me. He is the only one I want to see right now. I missed him so bad. Please, come here and save me like what you always did before, every time that I was in chaos.

“Wala nang magagawa iyang pag-iyak mo Blair. Kung hindi tutupad ang mga Ventura sa gusto kong mangyari ay hindi ka nila makukuha ng buhay sa akin.”

Humigpit ang kapit ko sa lubid na pinagtatalian sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung kakayanin ko pa ba itong nararamdaman ko. Dahil sobra ng sakit ng aking katawan at sumasakit muli ang aking ulo.

“Nandito na ang lahat ng kailangan mo. Let her go, senator.” his cold baritone voice that deep inside my bone, wakes up the sleeping lion in me.

Naluluha kong iniangat ang aking paningin at nagtama ang mga mata namin ni Ace mula sa kaniyang kinaroroonan sa ibaba.

“Ace…” It was almost a breath when I said that to him. Hinang hina na ako. Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras na akong nakatali rito sa itaas. Namamanhid na rin ang aking mga braso at binti.

“Sumunod ka sa usapan Ace kung hindi ay mamatay si Blair. Don’t call any cops and lend me the money I need.”

Lumapit si Denis kay Ace at tinutukan siya nito ng baril. Hindi naman gumalaw si Ace at mariing tingin lang ang iginagawad sa kanila.

Kinuha nito ang bag na dala ni Ace at nakita kong buksan iyon para siguraduhin. It was a bag of money if I am not mistaken.

“Half of a billion is enough. Ibaba nyo siya, ngayon din. Tumupad ako sa kasunduan kaya dapat ikaw rin.” It sent a shiver down my spine. I never heard him spoke this stern and humid.

Naramdaman ko namang unti unti akong bumababa mula sa aking pagkakalutang sa ere.

Pero bago pa man ako bumagsak sa lupa ay naramdaman ko na agad ang bisig ni Ace na nakasaklolo sa akin. He untied my wrist and feet from the tight rope that was tied on me.

Nahihirapan akong tumayo kaya mabilis akong napakapit sa kaniya.

“Your safe now, I’m here,” he said it assuringly in a whisper on my ear. His voice was deep and husky.

“Umalis na tayo dito Ace,” nanghihina kong ani sa kaniya dahil natatakot ako sa ano pang pwedeng mangyari hangga’t nandito pa kami.

“Kung inaakala niyong makakaalis na kayong dalawa rito ng buhay ay nagkakamali kayo. Denis,” dinig ko ang malakas na boses ni Senator na tumawag sa kaniyang utusan

Nagugulat akong napatingin kay Denis nang itutok niya sa amin ang baril. Natigilan ako at pakiramdam ko ay ano mang oras ay posible kaming mamatay ngayon sa aming kinatatayuan ni Ace.

“Denis stop! Alam kong hindi mo gusto ’tong ginagawa mo. Put down the gun, please.” Mahinaon kong pakiusap sa kaniya.

I saw confusion and hesitation in his eyes. He was just commanded by the evil senator but I know he’s a good man.

“Please, Denis!” I tried more to get his sympathy.

“Denis do it! Don’t be so stupid! Do your job, shoot them now!” senator screamed in command that stressed me out.

I felt Ace’s hand held my back. I looked at him wearily. I am scared for us right now. I don’t want us to lose each other.

“I’m sorry Blair. I am really sorry. Handa na akong pagbayaran ang lahat ng kasalanan ko. Patawarin mo ako…” Ani ni Denis sa di kalayuan sa amin ngayon.

Then I saw how Denis slowly put down his gun. Ngunit natigilan naman kami nang biglang damputin ni Senator Fuentes ang baril at tinutok sa akin.

And in a sudden move, he pulled the trigger through me. Halos malagutan ako nang hininga nang marinig ko ang nakakabinging malakas na putok ng baril na minsan nang pumatay sa aking mga magulang. I was about to catch the bullet when Ace covered me with his body.

“Ahh, Blair…” he groaned as his eyes popped out for seconds then stared at me wearily.

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko at walang ano ano ay agad na namalisbis ang mga luha kong hindi ko inaasahang lalabas sa aking mga mata.

My eyes widen and I can’t just blink that I’m seeing him now slowly drifting from my arms.

Then I heard a loud shot of a gun again. I saw senator Fuentes’s body fell down to the ground. Nakita kong dumating sila Johnson at Bench kasama ang mga pulis. Ngunit hindi ko na iyon nagawa pang bigyan ng pansin dahil sa mga luha kong parang gripo na ngayong bumubuhos sa aking magkabilang pisngi.

“A-Ace… Ace, please wake up.” walang humpay sa pag-agos ng mga luha ko. Ang bigat bigat ng pakiramdam ko. Hindi ko kakayanin kapag nawala siya.

He coughs some blood that made me more panicked and horrified to see his blood out of his mouth. He’s now getting short to breathe that he was now panting just to catch the air he is now started to lose. I held his arms and carried his jaw.

Napaupo ako sa sahig at nanginginig ang mga kamay kong inihiga siya sa aking mga bisig.

I’m happy when I’m with him. I felt everything like a roller coaster feeling when he is with me. There are times that I get mad at him. But I still want to embrace my feelings towards him. I wanna say to Ace what I am feeling for him.

I touched his back. My hand was shaking and my lips were trembling.

His blood was scattered on the floor and his back was on my lap. It’s like what happened to my parents before. I am scared and weak as my face is filled with tears. I was shaking and my lips parted like I was searching for the word I cannot find my own.

“A-Ace, please no, no d-don’t close your eyes. Look at me, looked at me, Ace! I love you, Ace, please stay awake. Ace…” tinatapik ko ang kaniyang pisngi ng kamay kong nababalot na ng kaniyang dugo ngayon.

It’s not late for us. I know that we are meant to each other. So please Ace wake up and don’t leave me.

I stared at him as my tears flowed in my cheeks profusely. My chest heave and pounding so loud that screaming in fear that I might lose him. And when I saw him plaster a small smile on his lips while his eyes dilated eyes directed on me. I frozed.

“Ace, I love you…please don’t leave me,” I said in a breathy way as my wails are escaping into my mouth.

But when he parted his lips and tried to utter something, his eyes slowly shut like it now fell into a doze.

Hindi pwede, Ace…

Kabanata 40

Kabanata 40

Broken

Mabilis ang patakbo ng sinasakyan naming ambulansya. Nasa tabi ako ni Ace habang mahigpit akong nakahawak sa kaniyang kaliwang kamay.

My tears were still running as my lips trembled and my hands were shaking while I was holding his hand.

“Ace m-malapit na tayo, huwag kang bibitaw. Please Ace,” pagkausap ko sa kaniya.

His eyes were shut and I have no idea if he can hear me or not. My mind was on its sane even it begins to crumble on what just happened. I need to be fine to check on him. I want to be on his side. I want to hold his hand until he wakes up.

I kiss his fingers. Magkasalikop ang dalawa kong kamay sa isa niyang kamay. Napaahon ako nang huminto ang sasakyan namin at mabilis na kumilos ang mga nurses. Bumaba ako at patakbong lakad ang nagagawa dahil nakasunod ako sa kanila.

“Ace…” Someone stopped me from following the stretcher.

“Ace! Let me in please I need to see him.” napahagulhol na ako at napaupo sa kinatatayuan ko.

“Blair hindi ka pwedeng pumasok. Ace is will be under operation and you need to stay here. He will be okay,” I heard Johnson’s voice.

“I-It’s my fault Johnson, hindi ito mangyayari kung hindi sa akin. Kasalanan ko ’to…”

“It’s not your fault Blair, do you understand?” aniya habang hawak ang dalawa kong braso.

I can’t look at him. I am so drained and tired. I am worried and scared. I’m scared to lose someone like him. He’s special to me and I can’t just lose him.

“Looked at me, Blair. Looked at me!”

Marahan kong iniangat ang tingin ko kay Johnson.

“Hindi mo kasalanan ang nangyari. Tumayo ka na diyan. Maupo tayo ron at maghintay na matapos ang mga doktor sa ginagawa nila. Let’s just pray that he’ll be fine, okay?”

Tumango-tango ako at inalalayan niya akong makatayo. Nanlulumo at bagsak ang balikat akong tumayo at saka naupo sa upuan.

“What happened? Where’s Ace? Where is my son?”

Napatingin ako sa ina ni Ace na nagkukumahog na rin sa paglapit sa amin. She looked so worried that her eyes were weary.

“Nasa loob pa po ng operating room Madame-”

“Ano ba ang nangyari?! If something bad happens to him malalagot ang kumpaniya n’yo. It’s because of your man, kung hindi kayo nagbagal at nagmadali kayong kumilos para mahuli si Fuentes, sana ay hindi na ito nangyayari.” I heard Madame’s furious voice towards Johnson.

I stood up. I can’t let her blame Johnson. It’s because of me kaya iyon nangyari. It’s not because of his man nor their arms. It’s because I’m always in trouble and I implicate him.

“Hindi po kasalanan ni Johnson. Ako po ang dapat na matatamaan ng-”

“Shut up! I told you to talk to him. I accept you for my son because that is what he wants me to do. I warned him to avoid you because I know this will gonna happen but he refused me because he loved you. And now his life is in danger because of you!” She lamented furiously on me.

Hindi ako makatingin sa mga mata ni Madame. Her eyes narrowed and dagging me. That’s all I can take. It’s my fault and I deserved her laments. Ace life is on the edge now. Trembling hands and my shoulders shudders, I just remain my eyes on the floor and didn’t face Ace’s mom in so much shame.

“Kapag may nangyaring masama sa anak ko…huwag na huwag ka ng magpapakita pa sa kaniya o sa amin ng pamilya ko. Puro kapahamakan lang ang ibinibigay mo sa kaniya. Gusto mo bang mawala siya ng dahil diyan sa kapahamakan mo?”

“No Madame, I want him to be safe that’s all I wish for him.”

“Then let him go! Wala kang maidudulot na maganda sa anak ko.” mariing aniya bago niya ako tinalikuran.

I saw don Denver beside her. He just looked at me and never say a word.

“I’m sorry… I-I’m so sorry,” I said in pleading to them.

Huminto si Madame sa paglalakad at nananatiling nakatalikod sa akin.

“Tandaan mo ang sinabi ko sayo hija. Leave my son alone.” Mariin niyang sinabi bago siya tuluyang lumapit sa hamba ng pintuan.

Ilang oras rin ang hinintay namin bago bumukas ang pinto ng operating room. Nahihirapan ako sa magiging desisyon ko. I don’t want to leave him but I can’t let him in danger.

I don’t want him to put his life on the cliff of death. I want him to be with me but if his life is gonna be at stake and will be the reason to take us apart then be it. I’d rather want him to be alive than to be with him without uncertain survival.

My life was a waste in the past years because of the tragedy. He made me a reason to live in the reality of life and not in hatred and sorrow. And now I want him to live where he’s safe and I’m sure that his life will not be at stake anymore.

I need to leave him for the sake of his safety. I find out that I have no choice. It’s just my feelings that make it hard for me to choose.

I hurriedly walk towards the door of the OR when it opens and the doctor came out.

“How’s my son?” his mother immediately asked.

The doctor removed his face mask and looked at us worriedly. The beat of my heart fastened when he concernedly looked at me.

“You’re son’s condition is in danger. We removed the bullet but it affects his lungs. Ace is lucky that the bullet embeds in the chest wall and the bullet didn’t enter his chest. But while the surgery was performed we noticed that his lungs got affected that’s why he coughed blood. It’s good that he arrived early because he could die from bleeding into the lungs, basically drowning in his own blood.”

“So what do we need to do para mapabilis ang kaniyang paggaling?” tanong ng Don.

“Your son needed to run some tests to check if there are some affected organs. He will recover easily after we make sure all of it.”

Tumango ang mga magulang ni Ace bago umlis ang doctor. Nakita ko pang may kinausap ang ama niya sa telepono.

Hindi pa rin ako kumprtable sa kalagayan ni Ace ngayon. Wala kaming kasiguraduhan kung kailan siya magigising. He needs to recover and live his life.

I saw Madame and Don walked away. Johnson comes near me and puts his hand on my shoulder.

“You should rest, Blair. You’re tired and you have some bruises also. Come on I’ll call a nurse to check on it.”

“Ayos lang ako Johnson, hindi ako pwedeng umalis dito hangga’t hindi pa nagigising si Ace.”

“But Blair you need to rest para mabantayan mo siya.”

I sighed before I go with him. May umalalay sa aking nurse at ginamot ang sugat ko sa kamay at binti. Nilinis ko din ang dugo ni Ace na natuyo sa aking katawan.

“Let’s go ihahatid na kita sa inyo.”

“H-Huh? Hindi pwede Johnson. Kailangan kong bantayan si-”

“Blair, look at yourself now. Your dress was painted with blood. And you also have wounds, you need to take a rest. Don’t force yourself-”

“I’m not forcing myself Johnson! I just want to see him and to take care of him. I don’t care if I’m exhausted or I have some fresh wounds that needs to treat. I  just don’t want to leave him here like this…” I cried and I can’t help but bit my lower lip to stop myself from sobbing.

The nurses were looking at us and I don’t care. I am so weak and strained but I choose to be here because of him. It’s not all enough if you will compare all the sacrifices that he made for me.

He offered his life to save me. I shouted at him and hurt his feelings. I pushed him away but he never leaves. And now that he’s here lying on the hospital bed I can’t just leave him here.

“Blair, let’s go. Please, for sure Ace wants you to clean up yourself too. Hindi niya magugustuhan kung makikita ka niyang ganito.”

Sobrang lungkot at ang bigat bigat sa pakiramdam na naglalakad kami palapit sa sasakyan ni Johnson. He opens the door for me. Pumasok ako at nakatulalang isinandal ang ulo sa salamin ng bintana. I shut my eyes together with my hot lone tears.

Hindi ko na namalayang nakarating na pala kami sa bahay. We’re still living here in Ace’s house. Hindi niya kami hinahayaang lumipat hangga’t hindi pa nahuhuli si senator Fuentes. Diretso akong naglakad palabas ng sasakyan ni Johnson at saka tiningnan siya.

“Salamat,” ’yon lang ang tangi kong naisambit sa kaniya at tinalikuran ko na rin nang pumasok na ako ng gate.

I sighed as I think of my life. My life were full of bad luck. People always leave me. I’m scared that Ace would be the same. Pumasok ako ng bahay at bumungad agad sa akin ang nag-aalalang ekspresyon ni Manang Soling. Niyakap ko siya at saka naiyak muli sa kaniyang balikat.

Hinagod naman ng kamay ni Manang ang aking likod. Hindi ko alam pero mas lalo lang akong nakaramdam ng lungkot dahil sa ginawa niya. Maybe because Manang made me feel that she is here for me.

“Manang si Ace…” I said to her in between my sobs.

“Magiging maayos din siya Blair, manalig lang tayo at magiging mabuti rin ang lagay niya.”

Humiwalay ako at saka tumingin kay Manang.

“K-Kasalanan ko po ito Manang. Kung hindi lang ako naging pabaya at hindi pinapaiwan ang mga bodyguards na iniiwan niya para sa akin ay hindi ito nangyari sa kaniya.”

Umiling iling si Manang at naiiyak akong hinawakan sa mga kamay.

“Wala kang kasalanan sa lahat ng nangyayari hija, tandaan mo ’yan. Ang mga Fuentes ang may kasalanan ng lahat kaya ito nangyayari at hindi ikaw. Kaya huwag na huwag mong sisisihin ang sarili mo.”

“Pero Manang natatakot po ako. Natatakot akong mawala siya sa akin.” inalo niya ako at iniupo sa upuan.

Walang hinto sa pag-agos ang mga luha ko.

“Natatakot ako para kay Ace, Manang. I don’t want to miss him. Nawala na ang lahat ng importanteng tao sa akin noon at ayaw kong maging isa siya sa mga iyon. I can’t…”

“Hindi iyan mangyayari hija. Ibahin mo si Ace. Sa pagkakakilala ko sa batang iyon ay masyadong maswerte sa buhay. Lahat naipapanalo at laging may tinatagong alas sa buhay. Pinatunayan niya sa’yo sa loob ng maraming taon na hindi siya yung taong inaakala mo. Kaya naniniwala akong hindi ka niya iiwan.”

“Pero Manang hindi siya ligtas tuwing kasama ko siya. Ang akala ko noon ay siya palagi ang nagdadala ng trahedya sa buhay ko pero mali ako. Siya ang dinadala ko sa panganib. I can’t risk his life again. Not anymore.” I frowned as my hot steamy tears unstopabbly crawled on my cheeks.

“Sa pag-ibig laging may panganib. Nakakatakot mang harapin iyon pero kailangan dahil iyon ang magpapatatag sa relasyon niyo. Hindi niyo malalagpasan iyon kung ang isa sa inyo ay susuko. Kaya huwag mo siyang hayaang mag-isa, Blair. Harapin ninyong dalawa at huwag iiwan ang isa’t isa.”

Tumagos at tumatak sa akin ang mga salitang binitiwan sa akin ni Manang. Hindi ako nakatulog dahil sa pag-aalala at pangamba sa sitwasyon namin ngayon ni Ace.

Hindi ko kayang iwan siya pero ayaw ko ng ipahamak siya. Mas mabuti nang lumayo ako para masiguro ang kaligtasan niya.

Kinabukasan ay maaga akong bumangon at naligo. I want to see him and take care of him. Tumawag din sa akin si Maica at tinanong ako sa nangyari.

“Kumusta ka naman Blair? Are you okay? Wala namang masamang nangyari sa’yo?” puno ng pag-aalala ang boses ni Maica sa kabilang linya.

I was preparing myself before I leave and go to see him when Maica called.

“I’m okay Maica, si Ace ang hindi na sa magandang kondisyon ngayon.”

“Don’t worry he’ll gonna be fine, alright? Are you now going there?”

“Yeah,”

“Sigi pupunta rin ako ngayon para may kasama ka. Just wait for me there, okay?”

“Okay, I’ll wait.” then I put down the call.

I went out of my room and I saw Manang in the living area.

“Manang, what are your things doing in here?” nagtataka at kinakabahang tanong ko.

Nakaempake na ang mga gamit nito sa maleta. Kaya naman ay nagmadali ako sa paglapit sa kaniya kahit pa na naguguluhan ako sa mga nangyayari. Naiiyak akong yumakap sa kaniya para pigilan siyang umalis.

“Manang kailangan ko po kayo. Huwag niyo naman po akong iwan sa ganitong sitwasyon, please.”

Malamyos naman ang mga mata nito akong tiningnan at may matamis na ngiti sa kaniyang mga labi na nagpapagaan sa aking loob.

“Hindi ako aalis hija, inihanda ko lang ito dahil babalik na tayo ng mansion.” nagugulat akong tumingin kay Manang.

“Kung gano’n hindi nyo naman po ako iiwan hindi ba?” Malungkot at kinakabahan kong tanong kay Manang.

She smiled at me. “Oo naman hija. Ikaw lang ang pamilya ko rito kaya hindi ako aalis. Ihahanda ko na rin ang mga gamit mo mayamaya dahil dadalhin na ito papuntang mansion.”

I sighed and wiped my tear. I felt relieved when I heard her say that she won’t leave me.

“Salamat po Manang, pupunta po ako ng hospital ngayon.”

“Mag-ingat ka at alagaan mo ng mabuti si Ace.”

Umalis ako at sumakay sa sasakyang ipinahiram sa akin ni Ace. Pumasok ako ng hospital at saka pumunta sa palapag at tinungo ang kuwartong nakalaan para sa kaniya.

Nakita ko siyang nakahiga at maraming aparatos ang nakakabit sa kaniya. Hindi ko na naman napigilan ang pagbuhos ng aking mga luha. Papasok na sana ako nang may biglang pumigil sa aking boses.

“Huwag kang papasok ng wala kang gown at mask. Wear PPE, Blair.”

Napalingon ako sa boses na pinanggalingan niyon. Iniabot sa akin ni Johnson ang mga dapat kong suotin bago ako pumasok. Hindi pupwedeng pumasok ang maraming bisita ngayon dahil hindi pa mabuti ang lagay ni Ace.

“Blair!” niyakap ako ni Maica nang makita niya ako.

Naluluha akong muli nang makita siyang nandito. Nagulat pa ako nang makita ang dalawang lalaking nasa likuran niya. I tried to smile even weakly at Sean and Clark. They seem serious now but they managed to smile back at me.

Pumasok na ako kasama si Maica pagkatapos makapagsuot ng tamang equipment. Nahihirapan at mabigat ang mga paa ko nang mag-umpisa akong maglakad palapit kay Ace. Nanginginig ang mga kamay kong pinagsalikop ko nalang ito sa isa’t isa.

At nang nasa tabi na kami ni Ace ay hindi ko na naman napigilan pang umiyak muli. Masikip at masakit  sa puso ko ang makitang nasa ganiyan siyang sitwasyon. Naramdaman kong hawakan ako ni Maica sa braso. Nanginginig ang kamay kong inabot ang kamay ni Ace.

“Ace… I’m here, please wake up na. Don’t leave me okay? Hindi ko kakayanin kapag nawala ka rin sa’kin.” humagulhol na ako.

My eyes were blurred as I held and kissed his hand. My chest was in pain and in so much burden that I can’t lift it anymore.

“Ace, I loved you… Mahal kita Ace… G-Gumising ka na please.” It’s hard to stop my sobs while I started to get a deficit of air to breathe.

“Blair,” paghagod ni Maica sa aking likuran.

“A-Ace nandito lang ako, okay hindi ako aalis hangga’t hindi ka nagigising. Hindi kita iiwan. I-I’m sorry,”

Niyakap ako ni Maica mula sa likod at tinatahan mula sa pag-iyak. I can’t, I can’t leave you like this Ace.

Hindi ko kakayanin.

“Ace I-I’m sorry, I am r-really sorry Ace.”

Tumayo ako mula sa pagkakayuko ko kay Ace at niyakap si Maica.

“Maica, hindi ko kaya. H-Hindi ko kaya,” pag-iyak ko sa kaniya.

I can’t leave him. I want to be with him. I want to live my life together with Ace. I want to get older with him. But it’s all a dream for me. My wants will gonna stay like this. My wish will remain him and even he’s too far I still want to get closer and get him someday.

Napahinto ako sa pag-iyak nang biglang may tumunog mula sa aparatos na nakakabit sa kaniya. Hindi ko alam kung ano iyon pero nagmamadali ko siyang nilapitan.

“Ace… Ace, anong nangyayari Maica? Ace, hold on please.”

“Tatawag ako ng doctor, just stay here with him,” nagmamadaling lumabas si Maica ng silid.

Nahihirapan at naguguluhan ako sa nangyayari pero ang tanging alam at gusto ko lang ay makasama at mayakap si Ace. Hindi niya ako iiwan at nangako siyang kailangan ko lang maniwala sa kaniya.

“Excuse me, Ma’am. Doc, the patient…”

“Check the vital signs,”

“What’s happening? Ace!”

“Blair, hindi tayo pwede rito. Halika at lumabas na tayo.” hinihila na ako ni Maica palabas.

Mabilis at pino ang galaw ng mga doctor at nurses na nag-aasikaso kay Ace. I panicked and I was devastated to see him in that kind of situation. Seeing him being rushed by a doctor and lots of nurses are attending him. It gives me chills and nightmares that something bad might happen to him. But then he needs to survive.

“Blair please, let’s go” paghila sa akin ni Johnson palabas ng silid ni Ace.

“Maica si Ace, a-anong nangyayari please tell me,” hinanghina at basang basa na nang luha ang aking mukha.

Nanginginig ang kamay kong pinunasan ang aking pisngi pero mabilis na nabasa ito ng mga luhang walang tigil sa pagdaloy.

“Ace!”

“Ready the defibrillator,” anang doctor.

“Maica si Ace!”

“Halika na Blair,” It was Johnson, he was now dim and sounds hostile but I just ignored him.

“Please Blair lumabas na muna tayo,” si Clark na ngayon ang nandito para tulungan si Johnson na mailabas ako.

“Magiging mabuti rin ang lagay ni Ace, Blair.” ani Sean sa akin.

Nasa pinto na kami ngayon kaya sila nakapasok. My eyes were red and swelling by tears. Nang maramdaman kong nasa labas na kami ay mahigpit nila akong niyakap. Mas napaiyak at malungkot ko silang niyakap na pabalik.

I’m not scared of people before. I knew that I’m just scared to lose them when I get to love them already in time.

I got angry because the people I trust left me, not because of their wrong deeds. I don’t want them to leave me from behind. They are the people I loved and I treasured them. I’m happy to have friends like them. They never left me actually. And it’s just only me who thinks it from a different perspective that they leave me even they come back and I’m wrong for thinking them that way.

“Magiging maayos din siya, Blair.” pag-alo sa akin ni Maica. I just nodded and cried to them profusely.

Umalis na sila Maica at naiwan akong mag-isa rito kalaunan pagkalipas ng ilang oras.

“Ano pang ginagawa mo rito?” Mabilis akong napatayo nang marinig ko ang boses ni Madame.

I looked at her. She looked at me dangerously. I’m afraid that I shouldn’t. I’m here for Ace and I will not leave him. That’s my decision He never left me so I will not leave him this time.

“Didn’t I tell you to stay away from my son? Won’t you really stay away from him until nothing bad happens to him?” she walked towards me.

Hindi ako nagpatinag sa kaba ko. She is the mother so I understand why she hates me.

“I want to stay on his side like what he did with me before. He did not leave me so I will not leave him either, Madame.” I said with conviction.

Matunog siyang pekeng ngumiti sa akin.

“If you do not go away then I will keep him away from you.”

My eyes widened at what she said.

“You can’t take him away from me, Madame. Please, I beg you.”

“Then stay…away…to my son.” Matalim niyang ani at tinalukuran na niya ako.

I will not let the two of us get away from each other in this situation. Ace needs me and I know that he doesn’t want me to leave his side at this point.

The day passed and the next days. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi pa rin gumigising si Ace. I’m scared that something bad might happen to him.

Pumunta ako ng opisina namin ngayon at chineck ang trabahong nakatambak na sa akin ngayon. Walang ibang dapat na gumawa nito kung hindi ako lang. Sa makalipas na dalawang araw, wala akong ibang inuna kun’di si Ace. He’s my topmost priority right now and I want to be on his side when he woke up.

Buong maghapon ako sa hospital at opisina naman sa gabi.

“Magkape ka muna, Blair.” inabot sa akin ni Manang ang isang tasa ng kape.

“Salamat po,”

“Magpahinga ka pagkatapos mo riyan ah. Halatang pagod na pagod ka na Blair. Pagpahingahin mo rin ang sarili mo.” may pag-aalala na sinabi ni Manang sa akin.

“Ayos lang po ako Manang. Huwag po kayong mag-alala sa akin.”

Tinanguan lang niya ako at saka iniwan na ako mag-isa sa opisina ng kwarto ko. Binitiwan ko ang hawak kong papeles na binabasa ko kanina. Napahawak ako sa dalawa kong pisngi at saka ikinulong sa dalawang palad ang aking mukha.

I always cried every time I remembered Ace. I can’t stop myself from the excruciating pain of our situation. I need to be strong for him. He’s gonna be okay. I need to trust him this time.

The next day I woke up and I go to our office first before I dropped in the hospital. Mabilis lang ako sa opisina at iniwan ko lang ang mga papeles na natapos ko ng pirmahan at aprubahan.

Nagpahatid na ako sa driver ko sa hospital. I bought some fruits for him. I’m excited to see him because I got a text this morning from Johnson that his finger moves. Meaning he’s near to wake up.

Mabilis akong bumaba ng sasakyan at pumasok ng elevator. Naramdaman kong nag-vibrate ang phone ko sa aking bag. I get it and saw Maica’s message for me.

Maica:

Where are you? Papunta ka na ba ngayon ng hospital?

Ako:

I’m here, Ace is awake.

I happily typed my message for her then hit the send button afterward. Mabilis din naman akong nakatanggap ng mensahe mula sa kaniya.

Maica:

Nandito na rin ako kadarating ko lang just wait me up there.

I put my phone back and went out when the elevator opened.

Masaya at hindi ako makapaghintay na makita si Ace ngayon. I entered his room and accidentally dropped the fruits I was holding. My eyes widen a fraction as my lips left parted as I roamed my eyes inside his room.

The room was empty. He’s not here. Tiningnan ko pang muli ang numero ng silid dahil baka nagkamali lang ako pero hindi, this is really his room. Then suddenly I felt my eyes grew in heat. My tear suddenly stung in my eyes as I hurriedly went outside of his room to find him.

“Ace? Nasaan ka? Ace!” nagmamadali akong lumabas at tumakbo papuntang elevator.

“No, no-no-no Ace won’t leave me. Where is he?” My tear was forming but I wouldn’t let it fall.

My phone vibrated and I answered it abruptly as I pressed the ground floor of the hospital.

“Hi, baby,” his husky voice welcomed me from the other line that made me froze in my place. A single tear squeezed out of my wild eyes.

I was stunned that my tears fell in joy but also in fear that I can’t see him now. He’s now awake.

“A-Ace, where are you?” Nagpipigil kong paghikbi na tinanong iyon sa kaniya.

“I’m fine Blair, please don’t worry too much about me okay?” mahina pero alam kong pagod ang boses niya.

“N-Nasaan ka Ace? I want to see you, please tell me.” Nagsusumamo ko ng ani dahil hindi na ako mapakali.

“Take care of yourself while I wasn’t there. I will be gone for a while. Please wait for me, I will be back. If we really meant for each other, destiny will bring us closer.”

Napakagat labi ako at paulit ulit na pinindot ang palapag na gusto ko nang babaan at takbuhin dahil pakiramdam ko ay ang bagal bagal ng oras ko para maabutan si Ace.

“Ace don’t leave me, please. What are you saying? S-Saan ka pupunta? Sasama ako, p-please let me come w-with you.” Parang gripo nanamang muli ang mga luhang namamalisbis sa aking pisngi.

“No baby, wait for me, wait for the right time. Huwag ka ng mag-alala pakiusap. Maayos na ang lagay ko.”

“But I already miss you, Ace. I want to see you. I want to hug you so bad. Please tell me where you are. You’re not leaving me right?” nahihirapan sa paghingang ani ko dahil sa pag-iyak.

“I love you, Blair.” Biglang aniya na hindi ko inasahan.

“I-I love you too, Ace.” then suddenly the call ended.

Hindi. Mabigat at wasak na wasak ang puso ko nang marinig ko ang huli niyang sinabi. Nasaan ka Ace? Why are you saying these things like you were saying your goodbye to me?

I fell into pieces as I looked at my phone died. I was knocked sideways as I wiped my running tears.

Bumukas ang elevator at agad na tumambad sa akin sila Maica, Sean, Clark at Johnson na mabilis na nahuli ang aking gawi. Napahagulgol akong tumakbo palapit sa kanila.

I am so damn broken. I am so broke and I don’t know how to fix myself again. Nothing could explain the sadness I feel right now. My heart is just too full of despair as I run towards my friends who immediately attended my weakened knees.

Napaluhod na ako sa tiles bago pa ako makalapit sa kanila. Tinakbo nila ang pagitan namin sa isa’t isa. Tinulungan nila akong tumayo pero ang bigat ng katawan ko ngayon. Sa sobrang bigat ay hindi ko magawang makatayo mula sa pagkakaupo. Pakiramdam ko ay may mabigat na dumagan sa pagkatao ko at hindi ko magawang makatayo pang muli.

My chest hurts a lot. I can no longer cope with the pain. There are not enough tears to bring out all the pain and sadness I feel right now. I am so devastated that I almost do not know how Ace and I will gonna be together. I did not expect him to leave and detached the two of us.

I hold on to his promise and I will still believe in him. I will trust his words. It feels like there is something sharp that pierce my heart when I found out that he was now leaving me. He left me and he didn’t even wait for me.

I was so down and I feel blue to it. My heart sank when I heard him saying he’s fine even I know that he’s not.

With a heavy heart, I will wait for his come back. It will gonna be lonely and heartbroken for me. My chin trembled. My lips shivered as I cried on Maica’s shoulder. I started biting my lower lip and my eyes welled up with tears.

I will wait, Ace, I’ll wait for you. I will keep the promises you made to me.

Kabanata 41

Authors note: This is my first ever story na natapos at nasulat ko and if you are reading this right now I just want to say thank you for reading it until the last Kabanata of this story. Thank you for bearing with my

typos and grammatical errors.

Wakas is next!

Kabanata 41

Marry me

I have been longing for him since the day he left me. There are a lot of changes that happened but it seems normal to me. Every time the day passed I always checked my phone if he has a message for me. I frowned as I looked at my phone blankly.

I sighed and stood up from my bed. Changes are constantly happening every time. But my love for him will remain. It might change but in a good way, I will love him more each time I woke up for another day.

I walk towards the balcony and fixed my hair as I took a step. A small smile plastered on my lips. I’m still waiting for him to come back. I look up and see the sunrise when I got on the balcony. It’s a new day. Last time I remember myself watching the sunset and how it is important to me.

Sunrise was made to tell that every chapter of our lives has its own beginning. If you think that it was the end, you’re wrong. There’s no end as long as the sun, set and the sun, rise.

Beautiful clouds and beams of sunlight hit me while I went out of my car. I remove my sunglasses.

“Magandang umaga Ms. Cortez,” bati ng security guard na sinundan pa ng iba.

I genuinely gave them a warm smile. “Good morning,” I greeted them back positively.

Expecting people to greet and treat you right is base on how you treat them. I hated Ace before but he never gets mad at me. He love’s me instead of hating me. He taught me how love changes a person. I learned a lot of things from him, from single details which are really important.

Appreciate and never hate the people who can never accept you.

“Anong ginagawa mo rito?” Lisa asked me.

“I just want to see how your life will change after this.” ani ko habang hinihila na siya ng mga pulis.

“Kinasusuklaman kita Blair! Inagaw mo ang lahat sa akin at hindi kita mapapatawad!” aniya habang nagpupumiglas sa hawak ng mga pulis.

I just looked away and turned my back to her. People will always reach out for something they want. It’s really impossible for Lisa to forgive me and as I am to her as well. But I learned from Ace to forgive unexpectedly.

I just found myself feeling light after I let out all the burden inside me. Forgiving helps you to live normally. It’s hard to act like you are fine even you are not. Do not pretend that you are fine. People who known you thoroughly can read how your minds work, so stop lying. It doesn’t make sense.

“Maica, I’m fine. Mauuna na akong umuwi.”

“Pero teka Blair, hindi ka na ba sasama sa amin papuntang cafe? Join us, please.” she almost pleads.

I don’t want to be with them because they left me the moment my parents died. It accidentally happened at the same time that it happens to my parents. And I hate and blaming them for avoiding me. They are only what I have, but then they left me. I pretended that I’m fine, that I’m still their friend even I feel the opposite.

It’s okay to pretend when you can’t tell them the truth. But it’s not good anymore when you can’t take the pain. Leave… Rest… That’s all you need.

Refreshed your mind and soul and asked yourself about the things that bothered you. Take a break and go back when you are ready enough to face them.

“Kailan ang balik mo ng Pilipinas Blair?” tanong sa akin ni uncle bago ako umalis para pumasok sa paaralan.

I looked at him while wearing my jacket.

“When I’m ready uncle,”

Tinapik niya ang aking balikat at nakangiting tiningnan.

“Ilang taon na rin ang nakalipas magmula ng sumama ka sa akin rito sa U.S. Pero kung hindi ka pa rin handa, mas mabuti nang dito ka muna. Don’t railroad your time Blair. The right time will come and I hope that’s the day you can fully find yourself.”

I hugged him and he accepts my embrace. Find myself…

For those years I treat myself like a waste. I got it wrong. I am lost and I thought I was left behind. I was the person who always deserved to be alone. I can’t find myself in the darkness where I’ve been trapped for a long time. The light I was waiting is not in the anger and revenge that I wanted to take.

It lives inside our hearts. You will only realized it when you already unleashed the fear and the anger that being replaced by love.

I entered the elevator when it opened. I straightly looked at the closing wall. It closed at the same time as I shut my eyes.

Masayang alaala naming buong pamilya ang bumungad sa aking isipan nang mga oras na iyon. Mapait akong napangiti habang inaalala si Mom and Dad. For sure, they are now happy for me. And I believed that they are always guiding me.

I have achieved justice for my family. The dignity and our name that once happened to be in the mud are now giving color to every house is that our company makes. We take everything back to its normal.

The company of my father bequeathed to me was starting to grow. I am now planning to make it bigger and build a new branch out of the country. The elevator opened and my employees were in their line to greet me. I gracefully walked to greet them back.

Back then, my heart broke when I saw my Dad and Mom lying on the floor. I was heartbroken when Ace lied to me. All I can feel that time was the excruciating pain that made my heart shred into portions.

Until the saddest day of my life happened. The clouds were grey, sympathizing with the tragic event of my life. The cold wind and the threatening cry of heaven, it was all in that day. I feel how the nature vibe with my grieving heart.

I was alone and helpless. Like a flower withering because of the severe storm in his life. No life, dried and tired of continuing.

Masakit at hindi makakalimutang pangyayari iyon ng buhay ko. I’d lost myself as my heart beggin to shatter.

“Britney Clair Cortez,” His cold baritone voice.

I am now leaving him because he lied to me. He just played me.

It broke my heart when he reaches out my wrist and holds it tightly, stopping me from walking away.

Hirap na hirap ako sa paghinga habang dahan dahan ko siyang hinaharap.

“So you and Lisa… are in a relationship?” mapait kong tanong sa kanya.

He didn’t speak. I was believed by lies. He told me to trust him but I didn’t.

My trust became vague and it’s hard to give it easily. I doubted everyone and never believed in them. Even my friends, I doubted them.

I was living in my anger and no one can stop me from hating them. I lost who I am and missing the old me. I’ve changed because of them. They changed me into something I’d never expect myself to be. I became fierce and never scared of drowning.

I’m not scared to face them at those times. But I regret to take it to the wrong person. To the wrong family.

It was another mistake in my life. Ang mga taong tumulong at wala namang masamang intensyon sa pamilya ko simula pa noon ay ang mga taong napaghigantihan ko.

Guilt crept in me and the fire inside me was blown.

The moment I left Ace, for me it was him who left me. I see it in the other way around. My fear turns to fire. My sadness and loneliness were all set aside.

I walked out of my comfort zone and begin to be numb. It was stoic and gloom.

Nagtagal ako sa gano’ng sitwasyon sa loob ng ilang taon. Marahil hindi pa ako tuluyang nakakalabas sa dilim na kung saan ako nakakulong. Walang mapaglagyan ang galit at pighati ang nararamdaman ko nang mga panahong nawalan ako ng magulang at iniwan ng tao kong pinakamamahal. Pakiramdam ko ay mag-isa nalang ako at hindi na alam kung may tao pa bang handa akong balikan.

Umuwi ako ng Pilipinas at ipinagpatuloy ang planong matagal ko ng binabalak. Ang paghihiganti sa mga taong pumatay sa aking magulang. My anger boiled up when I heard about the fake engagements of Ace and Lisa. Mabilis akong gumawa ng paraan at naghiganting muli sa pangalawang pagkakataon.

Hanggang sa huling plano na ang isasagawa ko ay hindi ako nagtagumpay. Natutop ako at titig na titig sa aking laptop.

There, I saw a man standing near to the door where I put the only CCTV that could work during the blackout. And it’s only connected to my laptop.

Ace…

I never forget this man who broke my young heart. Who made damage in my life. I felt angry for what he did to me.

Darkness consumes me. Fear crept in me. And now the embers inside me begin to flame. That is the fire behind my fears. 

“Blair, sama ka sa amin later ah. It’s Saturday and you’re in the office, you need a rest! Chill out ka din kapag may time, don’t be so workaholic!” ani Maica sa kabilang linya.

I slightly chuckled while the angle of my sight is on the buildings outside.

The sun was now setting. Ang kahel na kalangitan at ang araw na palubog ay sa akin ang tama ng sinag nito.

Sunsets were proof that no matter how your life is damaged it will end beautifully.

“Hello? Blair are you still there? Blair?”

I snapped out and removed my back from leaning at my swivel chair.

“Yeah, I’m still here,” waiting for him to go back. “I’m coming with you all guys, just see you there later.”

“Okay, bye! Kita kita nalang tayo do’n,” she said before we ended the call.

Tumayo na ako at nagligpit na ng mga gamit ko. I get my bag and laptop. Paalis na ako ng aking opisina nang makalimutan ko ang cellphone ko.

Nangunot ang noo ko at naningkit ang mga matang tumingin sa cell phone kong may mensaheng natanggap. Kinuha ko ito mula sa aking lamesa.

Unknown number:

See you soon, Blair.

My eyes widened and the beat of my heart grew wilder. My heart slammed to its walls so hard that it almost gives me a nervous feeling.

Paulit ulit kong binasa ang mensaheng iyon dahil hindi nagrerehistro sa aking isipan ang laman niyon. Napahawak ako sa aking dibdib at saka matunog na bumuntong-hininga. I tighten my hold on my laptop and looked at the sun that is now consumed by darkness.

I know it was Ace, I can’t wait to see him again after an almost year. It’s now his eight months to the place he chose to go. I wasn’t mad at him because of what he did.

He leaves me and I know he did it on purpose. I just only want him to come back. Wishing that he is now fine and in good condition.

I go home and prepared myself for the hang-out that Maica and the boys prepared for me. I wear light make-up and bring my purse with me. I am wearing a white strap top and low waist pants paired with white classic pointed stiletto. I get my oversized brown blazer and went out of my room.

Nakasalubong ko si Manang Soling sa ibaba kasama ang iba pa naming kasambahay.

“Oh, hija aalis ka? Saan ang punta mo ngayong gabi na?”

“I’m going out with Maica and with the boys, Manang. Aalis na po ako,” Then I hugged her.

In the past months, she has known Maica, Sean, Clark, and Johnson. I frequently busy and have no time to go out months ago because of what happened. But my friends insisted to come here. They reached out to me and even I’m dealing with so much stress and loneliness they help me to overcome it.

Manang seems fond to my friends and they got along as well. I’m happy to see that we’re like a family.

Sumakay na ako ng sasakyan ko at saka pinaandar ’yon papunta sa high-end bar kung nasaan sila Maica. Bumaba ako ng sasakyan ko nang marating ko ang lugar at bumungad sa akin ang mga taong hindi ko kilala na nakatingin sa akin ngayon. Hindi ko iyon binigyan ng pansin at saka diretso lang akong pumasok sa loob.

My car wasn’t that flashy to make a show, so what’s wrong with them? Nang makita ko kung nasaan sila Maica nakapuwesto pagkapasok ko sa loob. Natanawan kong kasama nila ang iba pa naming kaibigan kaya agad akong naglakad patungo sa kanilang gawi.

Maica caught my view before I got into their lounge. She was shocked and gave me a stare that the people outside gave to me earlier.

“What?” nakakunot ang noong tanong ko sa kaniya.

We hugged each other and do beso-beso. The boys approached me also when they noticed my presence.

“Blair! Buti nakapunta ka!” Clark said then hugged me a bit.

“Yeah, Maica forced me.” At saka natatawa kong binalingan ng tingin si Maica sa aking tabi.

Clark chuckled then tapped my back.

“You should! And just enjoy the night! Masyado kang naging abala sa trabaho mo, so enjoy and chill naman tayo for tonight.”

“Clark is right, chill out. Relaxed and drink this,” iniiabot sa akin ni Maica ang isang shot ng tequila.

Napangiwi pa ako no’ng una pero kalaunan ay tinanggap ko na rin. I accept it and sipped on it. I raised my two brows and looked at Johnson when I feel how bad the taste of it. Mabilis naman akong inabutan ni Clark ng isang slice ng lemon.

“Mm, not bad. Thanks,” I wincingly said.

“Blair! I’m glad you came!” Then my attention was caught by Sean’s word.

He looked drunk. His pail skin is now getting rosy. Even the way he spoke, mahahalata mo nang may tama na ng alak.

“Hey, you’re already drunk.” ani ko sa kaniya nang malapitan ko siya. I sat beside him.

“No, no I am not. Hmm, ako malalasing agad? Tsk, it’s not me Blair.” naiiling iling pang aniya.

I turned my gaze to Maica and askingly looked at her. She just mumbled some blurry words to me. I can’t hear her because of the loud music.

“Ang sabi ko, broken-hearted ’yan kaya naglalasing!” sigaw niya pa sa akin nang mapansing hindi ko siya naintindihan.

“Broken ka pala,” nang-aasar kong sinabi sa kaniya.

“Hindi ba’t parehas lang tayo?” Tukso pa nito sa akin pabalik.

Nagugulat naman akong tumingin sa kaniya.

“I’m not broken-hearted, Sean. I’m just waiting for him,”

“Tss, it’s the same thing. She broke up with me because she found another man who is much better than me! Can’t she see? I’m all she’s finding for! I gave my time and effort to her but in the end,” umiling uling siya at diretso akong tiningnan sa mga mata. “she also leaves me. I gave all my time and I realize how wasted it right now.”

I frowned and bit my lips. I sipped on my glass and looked at him.

“Your enough Sean, maybe you deserve more better than her. Kung pinagpalit ka niya dahil hindi niya nakita sa’yo ang gusto niya then let her. She’s the loser, she loses someone like you.”

“Hmm, I like that Blair! She loses me and she’s the loser for choosing that bastard over me! Look at my muscle, it is more bigger than her new boyfriend, tss.” naiiling at natatawa kaming tumingin sa isa’t isa.

“Ano ba Sean! Kami naman ni Blair ang mag-uusap, pumunta ka muna ron sa dance floor at maghanap ka nalang ng bago mong girlfriend or hook up or fuck buddies or whatsoever just go away and leave us for a while! Go!” naiiritang sinabi ni Maica rito.

Natatawa naman naming pinanood na umalis si Sean patungong dancefloor. He’s drunk. Pagewang gewang na siya kung maglakad pero pilit niyang ibinabalanse ang kaniyang katawan.

Napawi lang ang ngiti sa aking mga labi nang lumingon ako kay Maica. One of her brows was tugged up as she looked at me impatiently.

“What’s with that look? Kanina ka pa ah,” ani ko.

“What’s wrong with your outfit, Blair? It’s a freaking bar and not an office!” Puna pa niya sa aking suot.

“Why? I mean, there’s nothing wrong with my dress tonight. It’s my fashion and this is what I want to wear! I don’t like revealing clothes like yours.”

“Revealing? Looked at your white strap top, it’s also revealing when you removed your oversized blazer. And duhh, I am wearing a tube top, what’s the big deal on it?” nagtataka pa niyang tanong sa akin.

“You showed too much of your skin with that tube top. I didn’t like it. Unlike mine, I still find it formal and not that revealing, so why not wearing this?” maarte kong tanong sa kaniya.

“All I want to say is that your outfit didn’t fit here in the club! You should go out for shopping with me so I could choose better clothes for you.”

“Stop it Maica! I have done shopping last week-”

“Oh you did?” nang-aasar niyang sabi.

I leered at her at hindi nalang pinansin.

“By the way have you heard about Ventura’s arrival?” she suddenly asked.

“What’s about it?” seryoso kong tanong dahil hindi ko talaga alam ang tungkol do’n.

“Ace’s Mom is out of the country since last month, right? I heard the rumored about her Mom picking a woman for her son! I can’t believe her-”

“Why are you saying this?” Putol ko sa kaniya dahil hindi ko agad nagustuhan kung patungo saan ang kwento niyang ito.

“Blair, ang tagal tagal mo nang naghihintay kay Ace pero hindi ka pa rin niya binabalikan. What if he’s now engaged? Pa’no ka na? You will be left alone at ’yon ang ayaw kong mangyari sa’yo! I am your friend so I decide to protect and help you. I don’t want you to get hurt because of him again.”

I swallowed hard when I felt my throat dried. I understand what she meant for me. Nagsalin akong muli ng aking inumin at saka diretsong nilagok iyon.

Maica just wants me to be happy and it’s for me to not get hurt again. But how will I tell her about the message I received at my office earlier? I feel that he’s mad at Ace because he leaves me. But Maica doesn’t know anything.

I told her about my relationship with Ace but not the last part. I didn’t tell her why Ace leave me because I have no reason for that. He just only said to wait for him and that is what I’m doing right now. He waits for me for so long so I’ll wait for him too. Even though I hurt him a few times before he still did not give up on me so that is what I will do, I will wait for him as he told me.

“Naku Blair! Sa oras lang na makabalik na ’yang Ace na iyan at may kasama pang babae, ako na ang sasabunot at sasampal para sa’yo.” nanggigigil niyang sabi.

Mapait nalang akong napangiti at inalis ang tingin sa basong hawak ko. I drink another shot and I am tipsy now.

“Let’s dance, come on!” Maica pulled my wrist to stood up from our sit on the sofa.

Nagpahila naman ako sa kaniya at dinala niya ako sa dance floor. I haven’t dance in the club but the alcohol was now driving my sanity. I was dancing and moving my body together with the loud beat of the music. The party was at its peak and the people were dancing with someone here on the dancefloor.

Napansin kong nawala sa tabi ko si Maica at nakitang may kasayaw na siyang lalaki ngayon. I frowned and continue dancing.

But then my body heat when I felt arms snaked on my waist from my back. The warm body behind me was welcoming. I moved my hips and ignored his presence. Sumabay din sa daloy ng tugtugin ang katawan niya na mas lalo kong nagustuhan. Hindi ko pa siya hinaharap at nananatili akong nakatalikod sa kaniya. I don’t know what I am doing but I just only want to enjoy just at least for tonight.

Then Maica’s word flashed in my mind. I pursed my lips. What if Ace came back with someone else? I waited for him for so long. I don’t have any guts to face him if that happens. And probably he will think that I’m really waiting for him, that I was so willing to take my time for waiting for him that long. I did that because I want him. I loved him and that’s what only behind it all.

My feelings never fade after he left me. It became stronger and faithful as the day, weeks and months come along. Kaya paniguradong hindi ko kakayaning makita siyang may kasamang iba.

Napahawak ako sa brasong nakahawak sa aking tiyan. I caressed his huge hand. I was a bit amazed by his veins that seem so very familiar to me.

It’s like I hold this hand before. It feels like Ace’s hand even it’s not. I really missed him so much that I imagined things that he was the man behind me now.

Ito ba yung epekto ng sobra kong pag-iisip sa kaniya?

“Hmm,” I heard the man softly groaned at the back of me.

Napahinto naman ako sa paggalaw at nanlalaki ang mga mata kong nakatitig sa kawalan. Napaawang ang aking bibig at mahinang napa-buntong hininga.

Is that how much I miss him so badly? That even his groans were also like Ace behind my ears. His hot breath that I felt on my neck. His deep husky voice and the veins in his arms.

Itinaas ko ang aking kamay para abutin ang kaniyang mukha na nakasandal sa likuran ng aking balikat. Nangangapa kong hinawakan ang kaniyang panga.

At nang makapa ko ang kaniyang panga at mapamilyaran ito ay mabilis na naghuramentado sa pagkabog ang aking dibdib.

“Oh my god, Ace….” I whispered huskily, tears threatening to spill from my eyes.

The perfect sculpture of his jaw that I was holding now. Nananatili akong nakatalikod habang dinadama ang kaniyang mga yakap.

Ace… I’m scared to turn around and check if it was really him.

I’m scared to disappoint myself by believing that he is now here behind my back.

“I told you to wait, but not in the fucking bar, Blair.” his cold husky voice said that left me astounded this time.

It was him. It was really, Ace who’s now standing and hugging my waist from behind.

My tears immediately welled from deep inside and coursed down to my cheeks. Tears spilled over and flowed down on my face like a river escaping a dam. A solemn tear fell down my cheek.

I hurriedly turn around and embrace him tightly.

I can’t stop myself with the overflowing unknown emotions I am having now. I feel so happy but sad at the same time. I feel so lonely but I wish that it will change now. I am so damn broken when he left me and I waited for him for so long. But now he’s finally here and all I can feel is my heart became fluttered in so much happiness.

“I missed you so much, Ace,” I mumbled as my hot tears escaping from my bottom lids.

Naramdaman ko naman siyang hinaplos ang aking likuran.

“I love you,” he huskily said in my ears that made my heart leap in so much joy.

I cried even more and tighten my embrace like I was stopping him from leaving me this time. That I won’t let him now.

“I love you too, Ace,” he then wrapped my face with his two hands and glanced at me straight in the eye.

I saw how his eyes crawl down to my nose then to my lips. Watching every part of me. Until my lips parted in awe.

Hindi ako namamalik-mata at hindi rin ito dala ng alak. He is real and totally here in front of me. And without any word, he immediately kissed me. He kissed me gently and I slowly tangle my hand on his nape as I shut my eyes.

He then kissed my temple and the bridge of my nose. In a slow-motion, I opened my eyes and saw his weary and immaculately handsome face.

Damn, I really miss this man. I kissed him thoroughly and I was a bit shocked at first but he then kissed me back. I disheveled his hair and kissed him hungrily this time. There’s a tingling feeling inside my stomach when I felt his hand crawled down to my back.

I am panting and losing my sanity on what is happening now. God, his kisses felt so good, and his warmth and huge hand that tracing every part of me sending me chills and shivers in my spine.

Naramdaman kong buhatin niya ako palabas at hindi inalintana ang tingin ng ibang tao. Mabilis niya akong naisakay ng kaniyang sasakyan. Nahihilo at naramdaman kong masakit ang ulo kong tumingin sa kaniya.

His view in my sight was blurry and I can’t look at him straightly.

“I’ll drive you home,” he then said in a deep large voice.

Shit. I’m not a teenager anymore.

“Don’t use that line on me again, Ace. I’m not a kid anymore that you will drive home.” mahina at mariing nakapikit kong sabi sa kaniya. Nakasandal ang aking ulo sa aking upuan ngayon sa loob ng kaniyang sasakyan sa front seat.

“I will drive you to my home and not to your house, baby.” then he maneuvered the car.

Napapikit ako at hindi na alam ang nangyari. My mind was spinning when I felt someone held my arm.

“Take care, Blair. Damn it. Bakit ka ba kasi uminom ng marami?”

“Ace, ikaw ba ’yan? Please Ace huwag mo na akong iiwan ulit. I can’t wait for you anymore. I’m tired of waiting! Please, Ace…stay.” naiiyak ko nanamang ani habang hawak niya ako. Inaalalayan papasok ng bahay.

“I won’t leave you again-” hindi ko na narinig pa ang sinabi niya at nawalan na ako ng ulirat dahil sa sobrang kalasingan.

At kinaumagahan ay masakit ang ulo at napapapikit akong bumangon sa higaan. Napakurap-kurap ako nang mapansing hindi pamilyar ang silid na tinulugan ko ngayon.

Napahawak ako sa aking buhok para alalahanin ang nangyari kagabi. Mabilis akong tumayo at tinungo ang bathroom ng silid. Natapos at nakalabas na ako ng bathroom ngayon pero sumakit lang ang ulo ko kakaisip kung nananaginip lang ba ako o dala lang ng alak ang nangyari kagabi.

I let a loud heavy sigh and went out of the room. Ace is here and he brings me here last night. And that thought excites me and lightens up my mood that I almost forgot that it happens last night. I’m so sure it was real. It wasn’t a product of my alcohol. Ace is now back and he is here for me now.

Nagmamadali akong tumakbo ako palabas at nanlaki ang mga mata kong makita si Ace na naghahanda ng pagkain sa kusina.

I blinked and the tears unintentionally flowed down to my cheeks later on. He’s really here.

Ang sakit at ang bigat sa dibdib ko ay ngayon nang napalitan ng lubos na kaligayahan. Napahikbi ako at napahawak sa aking bibig. Akala ko panaginip lang ang lahat kagabi. Hindi ko na siya papakawalan pa sa pagkakataong ito. Ngayong nasa harap ko na siya ay handa na akong iparamdam sa kaniya ang pagmamahal na pilit kong itinago sa kaniya noon.

He promised me to wait and he keeps his promise. At a slow pace, he comes near me. Nang hindi ako makuntento sa layo naming dalawa ay mabilis na akong lumapit sa kaniya.

“Good morning baby,” walang kasing tamis ang ngiting ibinigay niya sa akin nang sabihin niya iyon.

I smacked his arm. My heart thumped.

“Don’t cry please, I’m here now. I won’t leave you again.” he assuringly said.

“Dapat lang! Hindi mo alam kung gaano kahirap maghintay.”

Inalalayan ako nito paupo sa lamesa at ipinaghila ng upuan. Hindi makapaniwalang nakatingin ako sa kaniya. Ang tagal ko rin siyang hindi nakita at pakiramdam ko lahat ay nagbago sa kaniya. His hair was now a bit long but it suits him and gave him a more ruthless and intimidating appearance.

No one broke the silence after we take our sit. I glanced at him and dried my cheeks.

“Do you have a girlfriend now?” I asked him nonchalantly.

Gaya nang sinabi sa akin ni Maica, he might become back with another girl. I badly want him but if ever he has now a new apple of the eye and someone who he really loved, I’m ready to set him free.

It sounds so freaking lame but that’s all I can do. To respect him because I loved him.

“Yeah, and today is our anniversary.”

Mapait akong napangiti. I was shocked at how harsh reality can be.

“I’m surprised that you were still able to fulfill your promise to me when the fact is that you have someone else with you when you return,” I said with a straight face and bitterly voice now.

He noticed my shocked and dismayed expression. I narrowed my eyes on him and he is staring at me indulgently with his brooding eyes and lips with a ghost of a smile.

“I felt sad for you, for not remembering this special day of ours.” He then huskily said to me.

My eyes broadened and looked at him. Surprised and my jaw dropped.

“It’s July 18, our anniversary Blair.”

“Y-You said that you have a-”

“Ikaw lang ’yon and there is no one else except you, baby.” He muttered seriously.

“H-Happy anniversarry,” kalaunan ay hindi makapaniwalang bati ko sa kaniya.

“Tapusin na natin ’tong breakfast natin. We’re going somewhere else after this.” he suddenly uttered.

I smiled and nodded my head. We ate happily and talk a bit. Hinatid niya ako sa amin nang magtanghali at susunduin niya ako ngayong hapon.

“Mukhang masaya ka na ngayon Blair. Masaya ako tuwing nakikita kitang nakangiti.” Manang Soling showed up.

Nakangiti ko siyang hinarap. Nakaayos na ako at hinihintay na lamang ang pagdating ni Ace.

“Masaya po ako at nakabalik na si Ace. I’m happy because I feel complete now. Thank you, Manang,” niyakap niya ako.

“Walang katumbas na kasiyahan ang makita kang nakangiti hija. Kung akala mo noon na ang dulo ay ang huli, nagkakamali ka. Ang dulo ay ang simula pa lamang. Masaya ako at nakikita kong ngayon mo pa lang masisimulan ang buhay mong wala ng kahit anong poot, sakit at lungkot.”

“Dahil po iyon kay Ace at sa inyo Manang. Hindi po ako makakaalis sa pighati ng buhay ko kung wala kayo sa tabi ko.”

“O siya, sigi na. Nandiyan na ang sundo mo.” biglang aniya sa akin.

Ngumiti naman ako sa kaniya ng tipid at saka binigyan muli siya ng mainit na yakap. Siya ang tumayong pangalawang ina para sa akin. Nakakatuwa at nakakataba ng puso na makasama at hindi niya ako iniwan nang mawala ang aking mga magulang.

“Salamat Manang,” I said before I went out of our house.

Nasalubong ko ang isang sasakyan na may nag-aabang na driver sa labas ng bahay namin. I looked around to find Ace but he is not there. I turned my gaze at the driver and approached him.

“Manong nasaan si Ace?”

“Hindi ka raw po niya masusundo Ma’am Blair, halika na po at ihahatid ka na po namin bago pa tayo mahuli.”

“Ah, eh nasaan ho siya?”

Ngumiti siya sa akin at napansin ko ang medyo may edad na nitong mukha.

“Pumasok na ho kayo,” pag-iiba nito ng sagit sa aking tanong.

Hindi nalang ako nagsalita at pumasok na lamang sa loob ng sasakyan. Nag-aalala ako kung bakit hindi si Ace ang sumundo sa akin ngayon. He said that he will pick me up. I get my phone and texted Maica.

She asked me about what happened last night dahil biglaan daw akong nawala at kung sino raw yung lalaking kasama ko. I told her everything and she was surprised to know it all.

Maica:

Until now I still can’t believe that he is here. I’m happy for you Blair!

Napahinto ako sa pagbabasa ng mensahe nila Johnson at ng iba pang mga kaibigan ko nang huminto ang sasakyan.

Nagtataka at namamangha akong bumaba ng sasakyan nang makita ang OV Hotel na ni minsan ay hindi ko pa tinangkang puntahan noon. Hindi ko pa magawang pumunta rito noon dahil sa mga alaalang ginawa ko sa hotel na ito. Sa ilang beses kong pagtatangkang sirain ito ay wala na akong kapal ng mukha para pasukin pa ito.

“This way Miss Cortez,” I snapped out of my reverie when I heard a woman called me.

Napatingin ako sa red carpet na mula rito sa lobby hanggang pasakay ng elevator. Maraming staff ang nakapila na ani mong may pinaghandaan.

Sumakay ako ng elevator at may taong pumindot ng palapag para sa akin. Where is Ace? I checked my phone to text him.

Then when the elevator opened and I walked out. Ace is not replying to my messages for him. Kaya naman ay ibinalik ko ang cellphone ko sa aking bag at natigilan ako nang mapansing nasa helipad kami ngayon ng building na ito.

Malakas na umingay ang helicopter na nasa harapan ko. Tinatangay ng malamig na hangin ang dress na suot ko kaya sinikop ko ang buhok kong ginugulo ng malakas na hangin.

In a slow-motion the moment, I saw Ace showed up near the helicopter. My forehead creased and looked at him curiously.

He is wearing his formal attire and he’s dashing with it. Naglakad ako patungo sa kaniya at nakangiti naman niyang iniabot ang kamay niya sa akin. I didn’t say any word and put my hand to his landed hand. He helped me and he went in next to me.

May isinuot siya sa aking parang headphones at napangiti ako ng may marinig akong magsalita roon nang makapo na kaming pareho sa loob.

Someone maneuvered it to the air. Napabaling naman ako ng tingin kay Ace nang maramdaman ko ang kamay nitong hawakan ang kamay ko.

“Are you ready?” I heard him asked.

“For what?” nagtataka ko na namang tanong sa kaniya ngayon.

Umiling iling lang siya at saka ngumisi sa akin.

Bumaba na ang sinasakyan namin at nakakunot ang noo kong nakatingin sa lugar. Inilibot ko ang aking paningin sa paligid and I was amazed by the place. It was now evening and we almost travel in the air for almost an hour.

“Bakit tayo nandito?” I asked Ace nang makababa kami.

The wild wind blew out my hair that I keep on fixing. Magkahawak ang kamay naming naglakad papasok sa loob ng isang enggrandeng resort. Hindi ako pamilyar sa lugar but it all luxurious. It wasn’t a cheap resort that everyone can afford.

Naglalakad ako nang mapansing nawala si Ace sa tabi ko. Napalingon lingon ako para hanapin kung nasaan na siya sa paligid.

“Ace nasaan ka? Huwag mo nga akong pagtaguan, please hindi na nakakatuwa.” kinakabahan ng sabi ko.

Naglakad ako ng diresto at sinundan ang mga ilaw sa punong madaanan ko. The yellow lights scattered on the trees that give lights the dark place until I reached a place where the end of it.

Then suddenly, the lights came up that lit up the dark place. Maica, Sean, Johnson, Bench, and Manang Soling was in front of me now.

Mabilis ang kalabog ng dibdib ko nang makita ko sila dito ngayon. I saw madame Helena and Don Denver beside my Uncle and Auntie in the back of them.

Malapad ang ngiti ko at hindi napigilang lapitan si Uncle. Niyakap nila ako at naiiyak naman akong humarap sa mga Ventura.

“I’m sorry hija, hindi ko sinasadyang masabihan ka ng masasakit na salita tungkol sa anak ko. I want you to know that I want you for my son. You both deserved each other.” ani ng ina ni Ace na ngayon ay hawak hawak ang kanang kamay ko.

“Naiintindihan ko po kayo,”

“Salamat,” mahinang aniya at saka ako niyakap ng mahigpit. Hindi ko inaasahan iyon, marahan kong inilapat ang kamay ko sa kaniyang likod para yakapin rin siya.

Ace’s Dad just gave me a welcoming smile before he held my hand.

“I’m happy that Ace meets you. I’m sure that your Dad and Mom were proud of you.” Nginitian ko ang Don.

“That’s for sure,” my uncle spoke beside him.

Nahinto kami sa pag-uusap nang makarinig ako ng tumugtog mula sa hindi kalayuan. At saka ako napatingin sa harapan kong may nagkalat na rose petals na bumubuo ng isang hugis puso na pinalilibutan ng kandila.

Sinenyasan ako ni Maica na pumasok do’n. Napakunot naman ang noo kong humakbang at sumunod roon. Namangha pa ako nang makita ang mga alitaptap na nagsiliparan sa paligid kasama ng maliliit na ilaw.

“For you,” nagugulat akong makita si Mr. Alvaro sa harap ko nang may iaabot ito sa aking maliit na box. Nagtataka ko itong tiningnan.

“Britney Clair Cortez,” ngunit nawala sa kaniya ang aking atensyon ko nang marinig ko ang boses ng taong hinahanap ko kanina pa.

“Ace Holden Ventura,” nanunuyang ani ko nang matanawan ko siyang nakatayo ng tuwid malayo sa akin.

His lips tugged up. I pursed my lips when he walked near me and gave me a bouquet of flowers.

“Thank you, happy anniversary.” Sabi ko ng maiabot niya sa akin ang bouquet.

He looked at me straight in the eyes and held my hand. I felt my heartbeat raced the way his eyes bore into me.

Mabilis ang kabig ng dibdib ko sa mga oras na ito habang pinagmamasdan siyang may seryosong nakaguhit sa kaniyang mga mata.

“Happy anniversary, baby. Alam kong matagal nating hinintay ang isa’t isa. Nothing has changed for me. My love for you became stronger as I woke up without seeing you in the morning. I missed every inch of you. I loved seeing you mad at me. I want you to be on my side every time, every day. I won’t leave you again, Blair… I love you and please, will you be my wife?” he kneeled on the sand and offered me a diamond ring.

Nanlaki naman ang mga mata ko at napaawang ang aking bibig. I didn’t expect this to happen! Naluluha at masaya akong tumingin sa kaniyang mga mata.

I used to hate him before. I hate him but I love him at the same time. Marami na kaming napagdaanan at ang tanging gusto kong maranasan ngayon ay ang makasama siya sa buhay ko.

I want to live my life where he is there. The place I dream that will never become true if he wasn’t there. My anger and fears that he was untamed because he was my peace and my home.

My tears rolled down to my cheeks as I looked at the people who’s been there witnessing our tempestuous story.

“Will you marry me and be with me for the rest of our lives, Britney Clair Cortez?” He asked me once again that sents shiver on me.

“Y-Yes. Yes, Ace…” Nakita kong magdilim ang kaniyang mga mata at kung paanong gumuhit ang ngiti sa kaniyang mga labi. At kalaunan ay isinuot niya sa akin ang singsing at mabilis ko siyang niyakap.

He hugged me tight and kissed my temple. I felt him caressed my hair.

Tumungin siya sa akin at saka ako mariing hinalikan sa harap ng mga tao. Sa ilalim ng madilim na kalangitan at nag-iisang buwan sa pagitan maraming bituin.

The fire and fear that I felt before were now defunct. Never let your anger and hatred eat you. Darkness was always there, waiting for you to come in.

To feel scared is normal but to live in it, it isn’t. Be brave enough to never get scared. Life might be so harsh, but the people who believe in you were always there for you.

You are not alone in the journey of your life. I survive because the fire inside me burns brighter than the fire around me.

It’s because of my Ace. And I am happy that Ace didn’t stop loving me.

He kissed hungrily and I untangled my hand over his neck. I felt him so hard. His huge member was poking my entrance. He enters inside me as I scratch on his back.

“Ohhh ahhh, I love you, Ace…” I mumbled in a moan as he started hammering me.

He groaned and start moving faster. He fastens his pace and rocks me so hard.  He went rougher and stronger. That I began to felt that something familiar inside my stomach is about to build up.

He gripped my waist, his body hammering me this time. Recklessly and went inside me rougher and deeper. Until I gasped when I felt his hot liquid pouring inside me.

“I love you, Blair. I love you, baby…” He then huskily said at the top of me as his eyes bore on me darkly with adoration. That mixed with erotic carnal desire.

Wakas

Authors note: Thank you for ending it with you reader/s! I appreciate your time and effort in spending your time reading my story. 😊 Remember that no matter what happens, don’t let the fire consume you.

Let people explain themselves and give yourself time to forgive someone and to heal your wounds as well. Time will help us to mature and experience the cruelty of life. Muli, maraming salamat at sana ay suportahan niyo ang mga susunod ko pang istorya. Salamat :)

Wakas

“Happy birthday Madame Helena!” Tita Beatrice greeted my Mom. Today is my mama’s birthday and all our company colleagues, investors, and share, stockholders are present.

The Cortez family is invited and they are in front of us now. The familiar girl behind her mom looks so shy as she looked down. Hindi niya magawang tumingin sa amin at ani mong binabasa at inaalam nito ang bawat galaw ng tao.

“Oh! thank you for this!” My mother grinned while she accepts the gift from Tita Beatrice.

“This is our daughter, Britney Clair Cortez. May pagka mahiyain din kasi itong anak ko. She’s not used to the crowds and scared to socialize with them.” Tita Beatrice introduces her daughter to my Mom.

Britney Clair Corte…so gorgeous girl with a big heart. The girls must be jealous of her.

I glanced at her and I caught her staring at me. She then immediately looked away when she noticed my gazes on her. I moved a bit to loosen up the mood. Halatang takot at nahihiya ito nang tumingin sa akin. I know my air and it intimidates others. I just want her to feel comfortable around me.

“This is my son, Ace Holden Ventura. “ imporma ni Mama sa akin na iniharap sa mga Cortez.

I took out my hand for her Mom then I lend my hand to her. I saw how her eyes filled with hesitation if she will accept my hand. But when I saw her pursed her lips and just glance at my hand. She moved back to hide from her Mom’s back and didn’t accept it. My brows shot up as my lips parted, so I immediately withdraw my hand from the air, leaving it unattended.

Umalis na sila at may sumunod pang pamilya ang bumati kay Mama. That girl never leaves my mind. This is not the first time I have seen her actually. I had seen her before in his father’s office and I often caught up with her outside of school.

Naglakad ako palapit sa mga babae at iilang lalaking kumukutya sa kaniya nang maabutan ko silang awayin si Blair.

“Anong ginagawa niyo sa kaniya?” I asked them.

“Si Kuya Ace!” ani ng isang batang lalaki

“Ace, siya yung bagong transfer dito at hindi siya nababagay sa paaralang ’to,” Elena said to me when I notice that she’s the one mocking Blair.

“You didn’t own this school, Elena. Stop bullying her.” Pagsaway ko sa kaniya.

“But Ace-”

“Disciplinary office at dropped out or expelled ang makukuha ninyo sa paaralang ito if you all don’t stop.” matigas at nananakot kong sinabi sa kanilang lahat.

Madalas kong maabutang mag-isa si Blair at hindi kinakausap ng iba. Kinausap ko na rin ang disciplinarian at sinabi ang nangyari para hindi na iyon maulit pa.

I completed my secondary and I was in my senior year when Blair became a junior high student.

“Tara na! Ginugutom na ako. Bilisan mo naman Ace!” Hila sa amin ni Alex patungong cafeteria.

“Paniguradong makikita na naman natin si shy girl,” Jayden smirked. I know what he is up to.

I glared at him habang papasok kami ng school cafeteria. “Shut up-” he cutted me off.

“She’s beautiful anyway, kahit na shy type siya. Gano’n ang mga tipo ko.” Ngumisi pa siya na ani mong nang-aasar ang gago.

“Tss,”

“Uh-oh, mukhang may gulo na naman. Nagugutom na ako at naninira pa ng araw itong si Elena.” Alex butt in when I noticed the crowd inside the cafeteria.

“Speaking of her,” Jayden gave me a teasing gaze.

Umiiling akong tumingin sa kaniya at mahinang bumuntong-hininga. Makikitang lahat ng narito ngayon sa loob ng cafeteria ay nanonood sa away na ginagawa nila.

“At saan ka naman pupunta? Aalis ka na, eh hindi pa tapos magsalita si Elena!” Narinig kong sigaw ng kasama ni Elena.

“A-Ano bang kailangan niyo sa akin?” nanginginig ang boses nitong tanong. Naglakad ako papalapit sa kanila at ramdam ko ang takot niya.

“What is happening here, Elena?” I asked that made them all stop. Nagugulat naman akong tiningnan ni Elena.

“But Ace, siya ang nagsimula ng gulo na ito. Right girls?” Elena complains to me.

“Sinungaling ka! Tahimik kaming naglalakad ni Blair dito Kuya Ace nang bigla kaming hinarang niyang Elena na yan!” I heard the girl beside Blair said to me.

I then glanced at Blair’s way to checked if she’s fine. She didn’t glance at me. Nakayuko lang at nahihiyang tumingin sa akin pagkaraan.

“Bro! Come on, nagugutom na ako. Let’s take our order na.” dinig kong tawag sa akin ni Alex. Hindi ko ito pinansin at nananatiling nakatingin pa rin ako sa kaniya. At nang iangat nito ang kaniyang tingin ay nagtama ang aming mga mata. Bakas ko ang gulat sa kaniya kaya muli ay mabilis siyang nag-iwas ng tingin.

“Thanks, Kuya Ace for saving us. Kung hindi ka lang dumating paniguradong pagtutulungan na kami ng mga ’yon.” the girl beside her spoke.

Then my gaze immediately turns to Blair’s way. Nakita ko pa kung paanong maglikot ang mga mata niyang pilit na sa akin ipinipirmi.

“Uhm. T-Thank you.” tipid niyang sinabi sa akin.

Ipinasok ko ang kamay ko sa loob ng bulsa ng aking pantalon at saka ko sila tinalikuran. Dumating si Sean at tinanguan ako nito. I did the same.

“Night and shining armor? Savior?” ani naman ni Jayden nang makalapit ako sa kanila.

Napakunot lang ako ng noo at saka tinungo ang counter. A few months passed and the intrams came. Kasali si Jayden sa Mr. And Ms. Intramurals. Papunta kami ng gymnasium kung saan sila nagpa-practice to give him his stuff.

Pumasok kami ni Alex sa gymnasium at bahagyang nagulat nang tumili ang isang bading malapit sa entablado.

“Hi, Ace!” Elena called me sweetly from the stage.

I just looked and just nodded at her.

“Ayy gwapings! Ang sarap naman nitong batang ito!” the gay said just behind Elena.

Nagtawanan naman ang ilang seniors na nakarinig. Kaming tatlo lang ni Jayden at Alex ang lalaking narito, except sa dalawang bading. I smirked and my face lightened up when I saw Blair. I immediately looked away when I saw her caught my way. I don’t want to intimidate and ruin her focus in the pageant.

“Ay jusko! Mga estudyante pa ba talaga kayo boys?!” naghihisteryang sabi ng isang bading na palapit na sa amin ngayon.

The gay stared at us, surveying every part of me. Hindi ko iyon pinansin at nakita kong mapaiwas ng tingin si Blair.

Did I scare her because of my presence? Nakita kong dumating si Sean at mabilis itong naglakad patungo sa gawi niya. Ilang dipa lang ang layo namin sa isa’t isa. Lumayo sila at don nag-usap. Napakunot ang noo ko at hindi nalang pinansin.

“Mukhang may boyfriend na si shy girl ah?” biglang bulong ni Jayden sa aking tabi.

Naaasar ko lang siyang tiningnan at saka lumabas na kami kasama ang iba pang ka batch namin na kandidata. Hinawakan ko ang kamay ni Lisa para alalayan, masakit na raw kasi ang kaniyang paa dahil sa mataas na suot niyang heels kanina sa buong practice… She’s my friend and that is all.

I was amazed and it’s really caught my attention when I saw Blair walking on that stage. She looks stunning as she walks gently. I can’t take my eyes off her. I straightened up and crossed my arms when I heard a guy shouted.

“Ang sexy mo Blair!” it was the young boy from the varsity team.

Mabilis kong nahanap ang kaniyang kinaroroonan. Nakita niya akong madilim na nakatingin sa kaniya kaya agad din itong nag-iwas sa akin. I saw him gulped.

Hindi ko na nagawa pang panoorin si Blair sa stage na nagpeperform habang ang mga lalaki ay sumisigaw at tinatawag ang kaniyang pangalan dito sa crowd. Napakuyom ang aking kamao at umiigting ang panga kong umalis muna para magpahangin.

Her dress were not showy but her body curves are perfectly highlighted. I drink on my bottle and looked at Alex beside me.

“Tara na at baka tapos na ang pageant. Sayang at hindi ko napanood si shy girl. I heard she’s one of the top three. Damn, she’s great.” nanghihinayang niyang sinabi.

I threw the empty bottle into his chest. I glared at him and arched my brow annoyingly. He frowned and looked at me in amazement.

“Just kidding bro, let’s go.” natatawa niyang sabi kalaunan.

She won the pageant and I can say that I am happy for her. I went home and I just finished cleaning myself from the bath when I saw my phone lighted. It has a message fom Tito Clarence.

Tito Clarence:

Ace, I have a little favor for you. Can you pick up Blair? Nasa school pa siya at kadarating lang ni Beatrice rito sa amin. Mukhang natagalan ata si Blair at na-stock sa crowd for picture taking. We are busy and our driver wasn’t here.

Ako:

Sure, Tito. Ako na pong bahala.

At first, I was surprised that Tito Clarence asked me for this. But I can say that I like the idea of picking up Blair. Dahil sa nakita at narinig ko pa lang kanina sa mga audience na lalaki, naiinis na ako.

I was standing and leaning beside my car while waiting for her here in the parking lot. I looked around then I found her. She caught my stares and I was impressed that she didn’t look away.

I walk towards her and I noticed that she was shaking.

“Your Dad texted me. He said that I’ll pick you up here. Come on I will drive you home.” Sabi ko sa kaniya para hindi na siya mailang.

“H-Huh? But my Mom is just here. I’ll just need to find if where they parked the car. Maybe they are waiting for me.” She stuttered every single word.

He moved a bit and lowered his gaze on me. He was towering over me now. He’s tall and my height raises just above on his shoulder.

I moved a bit and lowered my gaze on her. I was towering her now. Her height was perfect for me. Hindi kataasan pero gusto ang ganon.

“Your mom is in your house now. Kaya sumabay kana sa akin, alam niya rin na ako ang susundo sa’yo.” I said in a serious tone.

She is still wearing her makeup and I can’t help but stare at her. I was controlling myself to take a glance at her way. Itinuon ko ang tingin ko sa daan habang nagmamaneho.

Nang makarating kami ay inihatid ko siya sa loob. Her Dad invites me to dine with them but I hesitant. Alam kong hindi komportable si Blair tuwing nandyan ako. Bumaling muna ako ng tingin kay Blair at ng makitang nakatingin din ito sa akin ay pinaunlakan ko na rin.

The day next, Blair was known and the boys were all looking for her. Naabutan ko pa si Clark na may dalang bulaklak para sa kaniya kaninang umaga malamit sa main gate ng campus.

I don’t know but I felt strange about it. I was mad about it. Every time that I remember it, I just want to burst out.

Kinausap ako ni Lisa kanina sa locker room and unexpectedly, Blair was there. Probably now she thinks that I’m Lisa’s ex-boyfriend. I looked at her before I left. She looked stunned so I need to leave this place. I don’t want to intimidate her.

Tito texted me and he said that I’ll be picking up Blair for today because they are out for the convention. Nakasandal ako sa sasakyan ko habang hinihintay si Blair na makabalik. I looked out for her inside the campus but she wasn’t there. I asked the guard and he said that he saw Blair with someone and that fueled my anger.

“Kanina bouquet of flowers and now another man to a cafe?” I said mockingly at her when she stopped walking when she saw me. Umalis ako mula sa pagkakasandig ko sa aking sasakyan at mas hinarap siya ng mas maayos ngayon.

Umalis na si Johnson para kuhanin ang kaniyang sasakyan. At mukhang nakuha ni Johnson ang tingin ko kaya siguro siya umalis. I know his brother and we meet already.

“I just want to apologize about what ha-” I cutted her off.

“I don’t mind if you hear us. Just leave Johnson alone. You’re a kid and it’s not good seeing you with him.” I seriously muttered to her.

I saw how her eyes widen a fraction and her lips parted. I looked away when my gazes drifted on her mouth.

Kinabukasan, nang maghapon ay ako pa rin ang maghahatid sa kaniya pauwi. Paalis na ako ng classroom para puntahan siya nang lapitan ako ni Alex at Jayden.

I looked at them askingly. The assholes were smirking at me.

“Come with us,” It was Alex.

“Where?” I asked as my brow arched.

“Cafe? Tara! Maaga pa naman at weekends na, so why not?” Jayden probed.

I glanced at my wrist to checked the time. Nakita kong maaga pa nga at baka may klase pa si Blair. I joined and our order was served. I sipped on my cup and glared at someone. Blair is here with her friends. I thought she will be still in her class but I was surprised when her group of friends comes inside the cafe.

Napansin kong natanawan ni Maica ang gawi ko. I smirked and talked a bit to my friends. For sure, Blair already knew that I was here.

Umalis sila at hindi ko maialis ang mga tingin ko sa kaniya. I got her from the parking at sinabihang ihahatid ko na siya. I drove and no one broke the silence between us. I looked at her from the mirror and she is just seriously staring at the road.

“You’re now having a circle of friends, huh?” I spoke in the middle of silence.

I turned at her and I saw her eyes widened a bit.

“Ahh, hindi naman. Kakakilala ko pa lang kila Clark at Johnson. They are kind to me, so we get along.”

I tighten my grip as I tried to apologize to her. Pakiramdam ko ay masyado akong naging seryoso pagdating sa kaniya kaya nadadamay pa siya sa gulo namin ni Lisa.

“I’m sorry,” I said out of nowhere.

Her forehead creased. She is staring at me intently while my eyes are still on the road.

“You’re not involved with us. It’s Lisa’s problem. Pasensya na kung ginugulo ka nila.” I added beacause she looks confused.

I parked the car and she still didn’t say anything. Naramdaman kong bumaling siya sa akin.

“Mabuti siguro kung kausapin mo muna si Lisa tungkol sa break up niyo. Mukha kasing hindi pa siya nakakalimot at nasasaktan pa siya sa naging desisyon mo.” She said to me softly.

I did not speak. I just only stared at her. Her hazel eyes that caught my attention and I can’t take my eyes off them.

“Maybe it’s better kung hindi nalang din ako sasabay sa iyo sa pag-uwi.” Naglilikot ang mga mata nito nang sabihin niya iyon.

Nag-iwas na siya ng tingin dahil alam kong naiilang na siya sa akin ngayon. Natigilan ako saglit sa kaniyang sinabi. I enjoyed picking her up from school and that is the only way why we had make small conversations like this.

“Ihahatid parin kita.” pababa na siya ng sasakyan nang magsalita ako.

“Pero ayaw ko ng issue. Pinagtutulungan na ako nila Elena at ginagawang dahilan itong paghatid mo sa akin.” Hinarap niya ako.

“Hindi na nila gagawin ’yon. I promised.” I seriously said. I need to protect her.

Hindi niya ako sinagot at tumalikod na siya at umalis. I sighed. Napahilamos ako sa aking mukha nang talikuran na niya ako.

The years passed at hindi ko na siya nakakasalamuha sa school. It was our last conversation. Napabisita ako sa kanila nang ipinatawag ako ng ama niya. And every time I go to their mansion I don’t always catch up with her. She’s avoiding me and I am thinking about it.

“Good morning,” Bati ko sa kaniya isang umaga nang makasalubong ko siya papunta sa study room nila.

“Morning,” she said and walked away.

I am in college when I heard that she didn’t win the title of the intrams pageant. I’m still happy and proud that she won consecutively in the past years. And up until now, I’m so proud of her even she’s just the runner up.

Kabababa ko pa lang ng sasakyan ko para sunduin si Blair nang makita ko siyang may tinulak sa parking lot. I was confused when I saw Blair pushed Angela on the floor. Mabilis akong dumalo para alalayan si Angela.

Angela was crying and she’s blaming Blair because of it.

“She said that I’m not worthy to be the winner,” Angela said as she sobs. Her hands were in my arms. Holding me as she cried.

“Bakit mo siya tinulak?” I asked Blair who’s now hyperventilating for some air.

“I didn’t push her because of that. And Elena is lying! Sila itong narinig kong nag-uusap about sa pageant and the-”

“Stop… Ihahatid ko muna si Angela sa kanila. Just wait for me here.” ani ko. I will talk to her later.

I believed that she has her reasons kung bakit niya nagawa iyon.

“Hindi ba at sinabihan ko na kayong huwag niyong guguluhin si Blair?” mariin kong tanong kay Angela. We’re now inside my car at ihahatid ko na siya sa kanila.

“Huh? Ace, she pushed me and blame me-”

“Shut that crap, Angela. Blair won’t push you kung wala kang ginawa sa kaniyang masama.”

“So you believed that bitch-”

“Don’t call her that. You have no rights. Isang pagkakamali mo pa Angela at panggugulo kay Blair, hindi ako magdadalawang isip na paalisin kayo sa buhay niya.” I warned at her.

“A-Anong ibig mong sabihin?” she asked nervously.

“Kung hindi kayo titigil I will make a way.”

Inihinto ko ang sasakyan at ibinaba siya.

“Ace I’m sorry. Hindi ko sinasadya.” I shut the door and immediately started the engine.

Bumalik ako sa parking lot at malakas na ang ulan. Where is Blair? Pinaandar ko ang sasakyan hanggang sa nakita ko siya. My heart hammered and I feel so stupid for letting her walked in the middle of the rain.

“Fuck,” I cursed beneath my breath when I felt his cold body. I hugged her and guide her inside my car.

I am angry with myself that she can be sick because of me. I can’t be like this to her. Damn it.

“Ace, I-I…like,” she stuttered.

“You like what?” I asked her,

“I like you! I have a crush on you.” nakapikit ang mga mata niyang sinabi sa akin.

I looked at her, I liked her. And this feeling was different. I just only feel this when she is with me.

Hindi ko pa nararamdaman ang ganitong klase ng pakiramdam sa iba. She is the only one who can make me out of my mind. She makes me so worry more than to myself. I want her to be safe and I feel like it’s my job to protect her.

“I like you too,”

The woman that I admired is now officially my girlfriend. Damn, I really like her. I asked her and she said yes to me. I want this relationship to level up when the time comes.

After our date, I never actually planned to bring her to my condo. But part of me wants her to see where am I living. I want her to know me thoroughly just like I am to her.

I was hesitant and scared that I might hurt her that night but when I saw in her eyes that she wanted it, I can’t stop myself from watching her in that state. She was so hot and filled with adoration that I have never seen in anyone. She’s the only woman I invited inside my unit, and yet he gets inside my room as well. I can’t hide my ear-to-ear smile as I remember how we share that steamy night in my bed. And up until now, I still keeping the pillow that her head laid on that night.

“Hijo, what’s with your smile? Do you have a girlfriend kaya ba ganyan ka kung makangiti?” Mama asked me. I was sitting on the sofa in the leaving room when she noticed me smiling like a crazy man.

I was doing my term papers and I also need to prepare for my MBA.

“I think I found my girl, Mama.” nakangiti akong tumingin sa kaniya.

Naupo siya sa aking tabi at nakangiti rin akong binalingan.

“Then you need to send her here at home and introduce her to us then!” masayang aniya.

I chuckled and looked at my laptop. I licked my lower lip as I think about it.

“I will Mom when she’s ready,” I said to her with the smile on my lips never get faded.

“Bro, have you seen this? Kailan ’to? I didn’t know that you and Lisa have a thing?” ipinakita ni Bench sa akin ang litrato namin ni Lisa.

It was an accident. This photo was taken when we’re on our senior days. She kissed me and I pushed her away in an instant. I don’t like her, damn it. This picture will just ruin our relationship. I don’t want Blair to doubt my love for her.

Pagkababa ko ng sasakyan ay naabutan ko siyang lumuluha habang ang mga mata’y nadapuan ng sobrang pighati. It breaks my heart to see her like this. I promise myself that I’ll protect her but I was wrong. Ako pala ang taong makakasakit sa kaniya.

“Britney Clair Cortez,” I called her. She’s not turning back to me.

Mariin kong naipikit ang aking mga mata. I felt my eyes getting hotter.

“Britney Clair Cortez, where are you going?” I shouted when I felt like she had no plans to face me.

Fuck it! I can’t lose her. Damn. Fuck.

“So you and Lisa…are in a relationship?” she asked bitterly as I saw her tears rolling onto her cheeks.

Napaawang ang bibig ko. No, babe please. It hurts me more when I saw how broken she was. I think I’m gonna lose my sanity if she will leave me. I can’t… I can’t lose her.

“Please, don’t hurt me this way Ace. Sinagot kita kasi hindi lang kita gusto and now we’re in this relationship at malalaman kong may iba ka palang talaga.” I shook my head at her.

Napailing iling ako at marahang naglakad palapit sa kaniya. I tried to reach her hand but she quickly moved it away from me. I got closer to her then hugged her tightly. I won’t let you leave me, Blair.

“Don’t believe them, you said that you’ll trust me. So just stick to it, please.” I pleaded to her. It thunders my heart as she pulled my hand out of the embrace I was giving to her.

“Tell me, Ace, do you love me? Lahat ba ng ginawa natin is all a lie? Did you just pretend?”

My eyes were bloodshot and I can’t feel anything except that I’m tearing apart. I was numb. I am fucking bastard for hurting her.

“Let’s go, I will take you home.” I only said avoiding what is happening to us right now.

“You did not answer my question, Ace!” nagpumiglas siya at nakawala ito mula sa pagkakayakap ko sa kaniya.

It’s not the right time for this. I like her more than she knows. I loved her. But I want her to realized that trust is one of the most important fundamental parts of love. And we don’t have that. I need to build the foundation of our love.

“Let’s break, I’m breaking up with you! You just freaking fooled me. And I don’t want to see you anymore.” pahina nang pahina ang boses niya nang sinabi iyon.

I stiffened. I was stunned and it seems that I was becoming numb at that time. Hindi ako makapaniwalang sasabihin niya ito ngayon. The tear that I was holding fell. I absurdly chuckled. I let out a heavy sigh then looked at her.

“Let’s not talk about it Blair, I know you’re just tired from school-”

“No, I’m serious. Let’s stop this shit.”

Hindi ko alam kung paano ako nakauwi ng bahay matapos akong iwan ni Blair at sumakay ng sasakyan nila. I get drunk that night. It was crucial love for me I guess.

“What?! How does that happen? Imposibleng ang mga Cortez ang kumuha ng pera Denver, kilala mo si Clarence! He can’t do that to our company.” I heard Mom, kinabukasan habang naglalakad ako pababa ng hagdan.

“I know! Pero sila ang lumalabas sa mga pinaimbestigahan ko. I call them but they are not answering. They gave me the benefit to doubt them.” mariing sabi naman ni Papa.

“Pero Denver, investigate them again. I’m sure that it’s not them. Subukan mong tingnan ang ibang mga shareholders natin.”

“Helena imposible iyang sinasabi mo. Lahat ng nakalap naming impormasyon ay patunay na si Clarence nga ang may sala. They don’t deserve our sympathy. They want to drag the company down and I won’t let that to happen.”

Lumapit si Mama kay Papa at hinawakan ang dalawang balikat nito. Dad was sitting on the couch.

“Anong nangyayari, Pa…Ma,?” Tanong ko nang hindi ko na mapigilan ang sarili na makita silang mag-usap ng ganito.

Bumuntong-hininga pa muna sila bago ako binalingan ng tingin. Hindi pa sila nagsasalita pero may pakiramdam na akong masamang balita ito.

“Sigurado ka ba diyan Ace? What if I got caught? Madadamay ang kumpanya namin!” si Bench mula sa kabilang linya.

I do not believe that Tito Clarence can do that bankruptcy and theft thing to our company, so I will investigate it in my own way. Bench knows someone who can help us so I ask for his help.

“I need you to check on senator Fuentes. Keep an eye on him.” mariin kong sabi.

“Damn. Sigi ako na ang bahala.” He said before I hang up the call.

I closed the laptop after reading all the articles. Si Dad ay nakumbinsi kong magpagawa muli ng imbestigasyon para mapatunayan kung sino talaga ang kumuha ng pondo.

It’s a huge money for our future hotel project kaya hindi namin papalampasin kung sino ang nagnakaw niyon.

Ako:

I will go there tomorrow.

I texted Blair after a long tiring day. I need to win her back again. I gave her space for a while para makapag-isip isip siya. And I guess that tomorrow is the time for her to let me hear my side.

Early morning pumunta ako sa mansion ng mga Cortez.

“Saan ka pupunta Ace?” I heard Papa asked me.

Hinarap ko siya.

“Sa mga Cortez, Pa,” I answered.

“Delikadong lumabas ka ngayon at magtungo roon. Hindi pa natin alam ang motibo ng walang hiyang iyon.” madilim niyang sinabi sa akin na ikinatiim bagang ko.

Hindi ako nagpasindak dahil kailangan kong puntahan si Blair. Tumalikod ako at umalis. Dad was convinced that it was the Cortez who stole the money while I’m not because I believe that Tito Clarence won’t do it to us. I was once his student in the summer back then that I get to know him as well. And it’s enough to say that he’s not that kind of a man.

I parked my car when I got outside the gate of Cortez’s mansion and I curiously looked at the motorcycle in front of me. Mabilis akong bumaba ng aking sasakyan at pinasok ang loob ng bahay.

Pagkarating sa loob ng gate ay nakita kong nakabukas ang pintuan ng mansion. Nakita kong may lalaking pumasok na pulos naka itim. Mabilis naman akong nagtaka at nanliit ang aking mga mata.

I prepared myself when I feel that someone was trespassing the house. And I immediately roamed my eyes when  I heard a loud sound of a gun. It busted not once but twice. Lumabas ako sa pader na kinasasandigan ko at naabutan kong nakahandusay na sa sahig si Tita Beatrice at Tito Clarence.

I pulled out my gun from my back. At pinaputukan ang lalaking mabilis na nakatakbo palabas ng mansion.

“Mom! Dad!” Mabilis akong napalingon sa pinanggalingan ng boses na iyon.

Humahagulgol at nagmamadaling bumaba ng hagdan si Blair. Nabitawan ko ang baril na hawak ko. The blood strays on the floor. Her parents were shot and I’m here seeing Blair desperately waking up her parents.

“No! No! No! This is not happening! Please, Dad, mommy wake up! I love you so much, don’t leave me.” walang humpay sa pag-agos ang mga luha niyang sinabi.

“Blair,” I said it in almost a whisper to called her.

“You! Y-You killed them! Y-You killed my parents! Hinding hindi kita mapapatawad dahil sa ginawa mo! You’re evil! You should rot in hell!” walang humpay niyang sigaw sa akin.

My eyes widened as my lips formed in a grim line. I gritted my teeth and my eyes bore into her sorrowful eyes.

“I didn’t shoot them, Blair.”

I thought breaking up with her is the most crucial part but I’m wrong. The person I love blames me for the death of her parents. At iyon ang hindi ko kailanman nagawang maatim.

Wala nang mas sasakit pa ron. I can’t fight her back because I loved her. I don’t want her to hate me. I need to prove to her that it wasn’t me. She called me evil, her words stabbed me directly in my chest. It bleeds but you won’t see it, invisible but the blood was visible inside.

Blair was watching the grave of her parents. Pauwi na ang lahat at kami nalang ang narito.

“Ace, ikaw na ang kumausap sa kaniya.” Ani sa akin ni Manang Soling nang lapitan niya si Blair ngunit ayaw pa nitong umalis.

“Blair, let’s go,” I called her softly when I got near her.

Ang lakas ng buhos ng ulan at hindi pa rin ito tumitila. Kaming dalawa nalang ang narito dahil paalis na ang iba. We are in the tent while she’s staring at the grave of her parents.

Lumapit ako sa kaniya at sinubukang hawakan ang kaniyang braso. Ngunit agad siyang nagpumiglas at nanlilisik ang mga mata niyang hinarap ako.

“Don’t…don’t you ever touch me! I hate you! Kinasusuklaman kita dahil sa ginawa mo sa akin at sa pamilya ko. You’re a living monster that I don’t ever want to see.” lumuluhang sinabi niya sa akin.

Doble ang sakit at punyal na sumasaksak sa akin sa tuwing nakikita ko siyang galit at nasasaktan sa mga nangyayari.

“Blair, please stop doing this. You know I can’t do that. I respect your Mom and Dad, so please stop freaking blaming me!” I frustratedly said. Ilang araw na akong hindi makatulog at makakain ng maayos. I need her to understand me. But she let the anger more than my explanation.

Her mind was closed and not open for any reason. Her heart was drowned by anger that it makes her blind from the truth. And it hurts me seeing her this way, blaming me that it was all my fault.

“Stop pretending that you’re helping me. I know you better now, Ace. You’re a liar and a fucking cheater! And you played me very well!” galit na galit niyang sinabi.

“Damn. Fuck!” I frustratedly shouted.

It really dumbs me so hard as fuck. My mind was blown by her words. That anytime I can lose my sanity.

Napahawak ako sa aking ulo. I massaged the bridge of my nose. I gritted my teeth.

“What are you saying, Blair? I’m loyal to you and yet you didn’t believe me. I’m trying to explain my side but what did I get from you? Huh? You are ignoring me. You’re avoiding all my messages for you.”

“Stop putting the blame on me, Ace! You just pretend that you liked me. Wala pa lang kwenta yung dinner date na hinanda mo. You know what? I didn’t actually enjoy that night.”

Nagulat naman akong tumingin sa kaniya. Nanlalaki ang mga mata at napaawang ang bibig habang hindi makapaniwala sa sinabi niya.

“Halika na Blair. I know you’re just-” I tried to stop her from saying hurtful words because I can’t take the pain from it.

“No! I want you to know that I didn’t really like you back.”

“Shut up, Blair. You just want to get even.” I bitterly pained said.

“I’m not, Ace because that is the truth. That I was disgusted by your kisses and by your hold on me that night. I feel dirty for myself that I let you get inside me. I regret that I let you that night. I didn’t like it. And all your efforts don’t make any sense to me Ace. It’s all cringe and too dramatic. I don’t like it… And I will never like it.”

Tinalikuran at iniwan ako ni Blair sa gitna na malakas na ulan. Pinaniwala ko ang sarili ko na kaya lang niya nasasabi ang lahat ng iyon sa akin nang mga oras na iyon ay dahil sa poot at galit na nararamdaman niya.

“Hey bro! Look at those girls, kanina pa sila nakatingin sa iyo. Ang isa riyan ay anak ng isang nagsisimulang kumpanya palang pero mabilis ang naging pag-unlad. Try her! I bet she wants to fuck with you, by her stares at you. She looks like she was undressing you already!” Bench said to me. He was drunk. We are here in the club. Alex is dancing with a woman near the dancefloor.

“Hahaha, you can’t see Ace? Every woman here in the club is drooling over you!” Jayden added in front of me.

Umiling lang ako at nilagok ang huling bourbon sa aking baso.

“Hanggang ngayon ba ay hindi ka pa rin nakakalimot diyan sa ex mo? Ace, it’s fucking years. Get over it. It’s time for you to moved on.” Seryosong sabi sa akin ni Bench.

Napangisi lang ako habang iniikot ang baso kong may lamang yelo.

“I will never forget her. I’m not going to move on and I swear that I will win her heart back again.” matiim kong sinabi.

“That’s Ace! Alam mo sa totoo lang, you always ace everything. From the studies, people, company and all but except one…” ani Bench.

I looked askingly at the both of them and give them a dark glare this time.

“Except Blair,” sabay pa nilang sinabi.

Hmm, they are right. I aced everything except her. But this time I will gonna used all my luck to get her back.

“Sir, babae ang may gawa nitong pagpapaulan ng bala sa opisina in. May nakita kaming earing sa isa sa mga bathroom ng building na iyon kung saan siya maaaring nagpalit ng damit.” ani ng police sa akin. Ito ang pangalawang beses na may nagtangka sa amin.

Nagtangka nga ba o sinisindak lang kami? The reporters asked me about the lead of this issue but I refused to answer them. I know that this is Blair. She is now taking her revenge.

“Mag-iingat kayo riyan sa loob Ace. May ipinalagay si Blair na bomba sa top floor ng OV Hotel. I-sha-shutdown ang power system at saka niya isasagawa sa pangalawang hakbang niya, ang pagpapasabog ng building ninyo.” Johnson informed me.

Ever since Johnson told me everything. She is always with Blair magmula ng makabalik ito galing ibang bansa. I used Johnson to keep an eye on her.

Alam ko ang bawat galaw at lahat ng pinaplano niya. I am not threatened at first pero nang malaman ko ang plano niyang pagpapasabog ng building namin ay hindi ko na iyon mapapalagpas. She needs to consider other people’s lives that will gonna be engaged in that incident if that ever happens.

“Pull out all the bombs. Don’t call the police, I will send all my men there.” ani ko kay Johnson. Nasa top floor na sila at inaalis na ang bombang ikinabit. I also have my men that will go to fix the power system.

“Ace, napag-alaman naming si Denis na tauhan ni Blair ay siyang tauhan ni senator Fuentes. He is just spying and using Blair’s anger to drag your company. It’s a great tactic for a businessman. He will drag his competitor using the other clients’ anger at lalabas na wala siyang alam sa mga nangyayari.” Johnson said over the phone.

I was inside my room here on an island. Galit at alam kong hindi pa alam ni Blair na ako ang nagpa kidnapped sa kaniya.

“I want you to come here to check the shreds of evidence. The picture and all that will testify that senator Fuentes was the culprit.”

“Sigi, papunta na ako.”

Lumabas ako ng silid ko matapos kong makapagbihis ng damit. I walked towards her door and I heard her screaming for help.

When I opened the door, her narrowed eyes directly bore on me.

“How dare you do this to me! What’s all of this? Is this one of your hobbies now? Kidnapping someone who is not worthy? I’m nothing Ace! I’m nothing compared to you! And you will get nothing to me.” Nanggagalaiti nitong sigaw sa akin.

“Aalis ako at maiiwan ka dito. Babalik din ako agad kapag tapos na ang ginagawa ko. At huwag kang magbalak na tumakas dahil wala ka ng kawala.” ani ko at tinitigan siya sa mga mata.

Tumalikod na ako at umalis. I prepared the helicopter and the pad where we are going to landing. I immediately contacted Bench nang makababa na ako at makapasok ng elevator. Sumakay ako ng sasakyan ko at tinungo ang address na iniwan sa akin ni Bench. I saw all the evidence and it was proof that we need para maipakulong si senator.

Naramdaman kong dumistansiya si Blair sa akin matapos niyang malaman ang katotohanan. Now, she knew the truth, she’s avoiding me. I know that she regrets and she feels guilty about what she has done. I understand her and I patiently waiting for her to love me again.

She gave herself to me. She makes me happy to know that I was his and she is mine. I’m his first and I’m proud that I didn’t cheat on her for the past years.

“Really? Ace Holden Ventura only do celibate? That is next to impossible.” hindi naniniwalang sabi ni Blair isang araw bago kami umalis ng isla.

“Yeah, I just only want you, baby,” I said sincerely then she hugged me as I captured her lips.

Nang makabalik kami ng Manila ay hindi ko inaasahang makikita pa ni Blair si Denis. Nagpanggap akong hindi kilala ito dahil pinaplano na nang mga pulis kung paano ito mahuhuli. Nasa kulungan na si senator Fuentes at si Denis nalang ang hindi pa naipapakulong.

Napakuyom ang aking kamay at nagtatagis ang bagang ko nang marinig kong nakatakas si senator sa kulungan.

“How has that happened? Check his family, the Fuentes. Halughugin niyo ang buong bahay at kung saan sila maaaring magpunta. Hindi pwedeng basta nalang niyang matakasan ang kaparusahang nakaatang sa kaniya.”

Kakauwi ko lang nang gabing maihatid ko si Blair at Manang Soling sa bahay na tinutuluyan ko. I am planned to live here with her but fate makes the way to took us apart again.

“If you wanna see your parents alive, come here to your condo. No cops or else I will hurt your Mom.” It was Lisa from the other line.

Pumasok ako sa loob ng condo unit ko at naabutang nakaupo si Papa at Mama sa sofa habang nakagapos ang mga kamay, paa at bibig ng mga ito.

“Ace!” Lisa is sitting behind them.

“Wait, I post my engagement ring on ig, and guess what? I tagged you. Blair had already watched our stories together. She’s definitely mad at you right now. Akin ka lang Ace,”

Nagtitimpi at mariing tingin lang ang iginawad ko sa kaniya.

Pang ilang beses ko na bang nasaktan si Blair? Lagi ko nalang nasisira ang tiwala niya sa akin. I used Lisa to find his father, I faked the engagement and she seems to believe in it. Lisa is a crazy love seek to me. And now she kidnapped my parents.

“Tell me, Ace, are you engaged to Lisa?”

I didn’t say a word when Blair asked me that morning. I just looked down and my lips parted. Gritting my teeth, controlling my anger for Lisa. They trapped me.

“Ace, si Blair… nawawala,” Bench uttered to me on the other line after the confrontation at the conference room.

“Anong ibig mong sabihin? I told you to keep an eye on her and now you are telling me that she’s gone? Dimwit!” I angrily said.

“Si Denis at senator Fuentes lang ang maaaring may gawa nito-”

“Then find the culprit! Huwag mong hayaan na ako pa ang gumawa no’n dahil sa oras na may mangyaring masama kay Blair, alam mo ang kaya kong gawin.” he was silent on the other line then I dropped the call.

“Ace, kumusta ka na?” Bungad sa akin nang nakakalokong boses sa kabilang linya.

“Tell me where you are. I will give you everything you want just. Don’t Fucking. Touch. My. Girl.” I know senator Fuentes is on the other line.

Baliw na tumawa ang gago. Napasuntok ako sa pader.

“Easy Ace, easy… I won’t dare if you give me the cash. I’ll send you the address. Remember that no cops or else I will kill this beautiful lady hanging in front of me right now.” then he immediately dropped the call.

Fuck! I hurriedly went into my car and drove as fast as I can. Pumunta ako ng opisina at hinanda ang perang kakailanganin ko.

Unknown number:

Let’s meet in the place where it first started. Abandoned building of the Cortez project to your company.

Kinuha ko ang aking telepono at tinawagan si Johnson.

“Tell your brother that I found the hiding evil. I will just send him the details. Call the cops and tell them that they need to be there after ten minutes.”

Napakuyom ang kamao ko nang makitang nakatali si Blair sa itaas.

“Nandito na ang lahat ng kailangan mo. Let her go, senator.”

“Sumunod ka sa usapan Ace kung hindi ay mamatay si Blair. Don’t call any cops and lend me the money I need.” senator walks towards his man.

“Half of a billion is enough. Ibaba niyo siya, ngayon din. Tumupad ako sa kasunduan kaya dapat ikaw rin.”

Lumapit sa akin si Denis at kinuha ang pera.

Ibinaba nila si Blair na hinang hina na ngayon. Nagdidilim ang paningin ko nang maibaba nila si Blair na mabilis kong hinawakan.

“You are safe now, I’m here,” I said huskily on her ears. Keeping her and telling her that I will always be here to save her.

Namulat ko ang aking mga mata at nakita si Mama na nasa tabi ko.

“Ace, may masakit ba sa iyo? Sandali lang at tatawag ako ng doktor.” hinawakan ko ang kaniyang palapulsuhan para pigilan.

Masakit ang aking likod kung saan ako tinamaan ng bala. Hindi ko inaasahang magiging kritikal ang lagay ko na aabot sa puntong kailangan kong umalis.

“This for your own good Ace. Pupunta tayo ng U.S. at doon ka magpapagaling. Mas mapapabilis ang paghilom ng sugat mo ro’n. And also we need to check if your body is really fine.” si Mama.

“Pero Ma, pwede naman nating gawin ’yon dito sa Pilipinas-”

“Their facilities and the medical technologies on the U.S. is more modern. Anak sa ayaw at sa gusto mo ihahanda ko na ang flight natin. Your Dad agreed to me and he thinks this is for your sake.”

“I want to see Blair,” Mama looked at me in a bit of surprise.

“Ace,”

“What did you do Mama?” I asked her, a bit hostile when I noticed that she looked stunned.

“I was mad at her because of what happens to you-”

“Ma! It’s not her fault. You know that I loved her. What did you say to her?”

“I told her to leave you, son. I’m sorry, but she’s not leaving you and I can see that. Lagi siyang dumadalaw sa’yo rito sa hospital para bisitahin ka. I just only want is to keep you safe, Ace.”

“Then we’ll go,” I said nonchalantly. I agreed with my Mom when I realized her situation.

I’ll leave the country to heal my wounds and get treated immediately. My case was a bit complicated and I can’t take to lose her this time.

I said my goodbye to her over the phone. We are here now at the airport when I called her. Hindi ko na ginustong magpakita pa sa kaniya para magpaalam dahil alam kong mas pipiliin kong hindi nalang tumuloy.

The day I met her, she already stocks in my mind. She always rocks my sanity and makes me a beast when I saw her get hurt.

“Bro, aminin mo nga sa amin. Do you like Blair?” Jayden asked me habang nasa loob kami ng library.

“Blair? ’Yung nanalo sa intramurals? Damn! She looks so matured, bro! Hindi mo aakalaing grade seven pa lang-”

I glared at him the reason why he stopped.

“What do you think?” balik kong tanong kay Jayden.

“Shit. She’s minor, bro!”

“Gago ka Jeydon! Alam mong priority ni Ace ngayon ang pag-aaral, kaya nga tayo nandito ngayon sa library. Study first, later fuck.”

“Shut it Alex.” pagpapatahimik ko sa kaniya.

I started doubting myself towards my feelings for her. She was too young for me. I liked the mature woman and guess she hooked me in an instant.

“Hey baby, look, I baked some cookies for you.” ani Blair sa akin at naupo sa kanang hita ko.

I smiled at her. I leaned to her neck and smell her savory smell. I really like her scents. So sweet that getting and make me lost all my rational thoughts.

She groaned.

“Ace, stopped we’re here in the dining room.”

I chuckled then get cookies from her lap.

I bite and looked at her seducingly.

“How’s the taste? Tell me if it’s horrible, it’s my first time to bake at ikaw ang unang nakatikim. I’m open for critique.” she put her hands on my neck as she asked me.

Damn woman, he makes me turned on every time she gave me that beautiful fearful eyes. The scary eyes ones she gets mad at you.

“Hmm, it’s delicious. I like it, it’s already perfect. Come on, I want more of your cookies. Give me some.” I said maliciously to her.

I saw her cheeks reddened. I touched her face at hinawi ang nakatakas niyang buhok at isinabit sa likod ng kaniyang tainga.

“Have you already checked your wedding gown?” I then asked her while I was gently caressing her cheeks.

“Yeah, kasama ko si Mama at si Manang Soling nang pumunta kami. It was nice, simple, but elegant. I like it but Mama wants to be more sophisticated and grand.” she pursed her thin red lips after she said that.

I licked my lower lip as I gaze at her pursed lips.

“Is that so? I hope it’s fine with you. Kakausapin ko nalang si Mama para hindi na siya makialam-”

“No Ace! It’s fine with me. She knows better kaya hayaan nalang natin siya.” umiwas siya ng tingin sa akin.

I pulled her waist. I locked her legs between my thighs.

“Okay, I’m fine when you are fine,”

I stared at her hazel brown eyes. My sight down at her thin lips and kissed her slowly. Her eyes shut as I held her jaw. We’re breathing slowly while our lips crashed into each other.

I captured her mouth and snaked my tounge inside of her. Kissing her hungrily. Blair gasped at the invasion of my tongue inside her. She moaned softly and I started nibbling her lips, sucking her tounge and exploring her mouth.

It feels good. I held her hips and put her on the countertop while our lips remain locked at each other until we couldn’t breathe anymore.

Hinarap ko siya at nilebel ang mukha ko sa kaniya. She opens her eyes and looked at me. Our eyes met, both panting, catching our breath.

“Ace…”

I glanced at her intently. I groaned then I felt her hand touched my erect manhood below the counter.

“Baby, don’t play my friend,” I whispered into her ears then I kissed and sucked her neck.

“You liked it?” she then asked me.

I grabbed her waist and draw an invisible line. Tracing her abdomen till I reached the hem of her clothes.

“I will love you and pleasure you till the fire explexplodes in me, baby,” I said in a deep voice.

The fear that I never felt in her. Because fire is what I can only see in her eyes. I feel the embers that burning me as well. It consumes her once, and I’ll take her out from there.

The fire in her fears. The raw anger behind her fear.

She’s been lost and thank god that I found her. I’m not Ace if I couldn’t bring her back to me. We overcome the fire of trouble without fear because the two of us will deal with it together.

I buried my face to her neck before I move in and out of her with so much speed. Her body shook in every thrust I make.

Naramdaman kong ibinaon niya ang kaniyang mga kuko sa aking likuran. I started to move even faster than before when I felt that I’m near.

“Ohh! Ace! I’m coming!” I gripped her waist and hammered her body. I fasten my pace.

Our body convulsed in so much ecstatic when we both reached our peaks together. We’re both catching our breath when I kissed her neck up to her jaw and subtly sucked her lips. Nananatili pa rin akong nakaibabaw sa kaniya at nakapaloob ang aking kahabaan sa kaibuturan niya.

“I love you Britney Clair Cortez Ventura,” I whispered in her ears.

“I love you too, my only Ace Holden Ventura.”

Then I started kissing her. Making love to her again and again. Owning and flaming ourselves with the heated fire we are now sharing in one bed.

You should never be scared to love someone. Fears are always there but you can conquer them as long as you trust yourself. Get out from the dark and start embracing the fire behind your fears.

Kabanata 24

Kabanata 24

Mine

Mahigpit ang kapit niya sa aking kamay at hindi ko maiwasang makaramdam ng kakaibang elektrisidad mula roon. And when we got inside the elevator, he pressed it to some floor and I never pay attention to it.

Because my eyes were only fixated on his serious menace expression. He took a glance at me and when our eyes met, mabilis akong napaiwas ng tingin. Na para bang kinukuryente ako niyon.

Nang bumukas ang elevator ay hindi pa rin naaalis ang kaniyang kamay na nakahawak sa akin ng mahigpit. Tinungo namin ang isang unit at bahagyang namilog ang aking mga mata nang buksan niya ang isa sa mga iyon.

He takes a look at me as he now getting inside. I saw him turned on the lights.

“Is…this your condo unit?” Mayamaya ay tanong ko nang tuluyan na rin akong makapasok sa loob.

“Yes, I’m staying here for a quite long now.”

Inilibot ko naman ang paningin sa kabuuan ng kaniyang tinitirhan. It was prestigious and huge. The walls were perfectly colored in a manly manner as it is on its rustic dimmed theme.

At nang maglakad siya patungo sa salas at makita kong hawiin ang isang malaking kurtina ay sumunod naman ako sa kaniya. He then slid the glass door that will lead you towards its balcony.

Malakas ang simoy ng malamig na hangin na mabilis na dumampi sa aking balat. At nang tapunan ko ng tingin ang gawi ni Ace ay agad akong napangiti.

“Let’s watched the city lights together.” He then said to me.

The smile on my lips grew wider as he held my elbow, inaalalayan ako patungong balkonahe. At nang makalabas kami roon ay namamangha kong pinagmasdan ang ganda ng syudad. The lights here at night were beautiful to look at. And our spot was the perfect place to watch and see everything that is happening below.

Namamangha at nakangiti kong binalingan si Ace. Tahimik lang siya nang maabutan kong seryoso ang mga mata nitong pinapanood ang reaksyon ko.

“It’s beautiful here,” I then muttered of factly.

Kung kanina ay nasa pinakataas kami ng matayog na building na ito at natanawan ko ang ganda ng syudad ay masasabi kong iba ang view ko dito. It was more convenient and facing the other side of the city lights.

“Yeah, I know. I always look at here whenever I think of you.” He hoarsely said that made me stare at him.

Nagsimula na namang kumalabog ang dibdib ko ng dahil sa kaniyang sinabi. I bit my lower lip and didn’t look away. He also remains glancing at me.

My heart throbs as his glisten eyes beam in the dark.

“You…were thinking of me here?” Nag-aalangan kong tanong pero ang malakas na tibok ng aking puso ay nagsusumigaw na gustong malaman iyon.

“Yeah… every time.” He huskily answered back.

His eyes then drift to my lips. His words were giving me a remark that he also likes me since before. It was a whelmed that I get to know it from him.

Umusad siya at lumapit sa akin. At nang mapansin kong ilang pulgada nalang ang pagitan namin sa isa’t isa ay mabilis na naghuramentado ang aking dibdib. Naglikot ang aking mga mata at hindi magawang makatingin sa kaniya ng tuwid.

I felt his serious glares on me.

“Blair,” he huskily whispered.

And when I lift my eyes on him, I felt my lips dried. He was staring at me darkly while his lips left in parted.

Napaawang naman ang aking bibig at nakita ko kung paanong dumapo roon ang kaniyang paningin muli. Tumiim ang kaniyang bagang at mas lalong dumilim ang kaniyang mga mata.

I swallowed hard when I felt the loud beating heart on my chest when he tilted his head and crouched to reach my parted lips.

My eyes bulged and I was left astounded by his sudden kiss. But when I shut my eyes, I started to embrace his kisses for me. He wasn’t moving. He just only kissed me like what he did earlier.

At nang humiwalay ang kaniyang mga labi sa akin ay agad akong napadilat ng mga mata at nakita ang namumungay niyang mga tingin na nasa akin nakadirekta.

I gulped. I felt his lips taste so good. It was so soft and feel comfortable that eases everything in my head. And it makes me feel like to want it more. I want his kisses on me.

Kaya bago pa man niya tuluyang mailayo ang kaniyang mukha sa akin ay mabilis akong kumapit sa kaniyang dibdib at inabot ang kaniyang malamyos na mga labi.

I shut my eyes as I felt him frozed for a while. But when I felt his hand held my back, his mouth moves in a soft and low waves.

It was my first time kissing and I don’t know what to do. But the urge in me to kiss him back was fully eating my system. I tried doing what his lips doing in a soft wave. I do it wholeheartedly as I began to accompany the dynamic we are started to make.

His kisses were so gentle and passionate. It was like a lullaby that makes me fall into something more. It wasn’t into sleep but into something that will make me feel my stomach-churning.

Naramdaman kong humigpit ang hapit niya sa aking likuran at gano’n din naman ang paghigpit ng pakapit ko sa kaniyang damit sa dibdib.

Then our kisses started to fall into something deeper. It was still subtle but when I started to feel the unknown feeling inside me, I kissed him back with the not same quantity I was giving earlier. Getting avid this time.

Naramdaman ko namang tulyan na niya akong hapitin at ilapit sa kaniya ng mariin. Habol ko ang aking hininga nang humiwalay siya sa aking mga labi at pagmasdan ako sa mga mata nang may magkahalong diin at pangamba.

My chest is pounding loudly as I catch the air I lost from our long kisses. But when my sight caught his vision, his eyes feasting on my parted lips. I swallowed hard.

At nang tumama sa aking mga matang muli ang kaniyang paningin ay nakita ko ang antipasyon doon. At nang hindi tumagal ay namalayan ko nalang na tangan tangan na ako ng kaniyang mga bisig habang ang aming mga labi ay walang humpay sa pagnanasa sa bawat isa.

His lips capturing mine as he lifts me in the air, getting inside his unit now.

“Ace…” I mumbled when I feel lost in air from his rugged kisses on me.

“Mmm,” he then groaned as he let me escape from our hot kisses.

At walang pang tatlong segundo ay mabilis niya muling nasakop ang aking mga labi. Malamyos at kakaiba ang dulot ng kaniyang mga halik sa akin.

At nang maramdaman kong marahan niya akong ibaba sa kama ay nag-umpisa ng bumaba ang kaniyang mga halik patungo sa aking leeg. I then careened my neck as I gave him my permission to have me kissed there.

Napakislot naman ako nang ang malamyos at masuyo niyang mga halik sa aking leeg ay masabayan ng paggapang ng kaniyang isang kamay sa aking likuran.

His room was dim but there’s a light glisten on us from his glass walls. Enough to make ourselves see each other clearly.

Napakapit naman ako sa kaniyang mga braso habang nag-uumpisa ko ng maramdaman ang kaninang nagbabagang init sa aking katawan ay ngayo’y nag-uumpisa ng lumikha ng isang apoy.

Napahiga ako sa kaniyang kama habang siya ay pinakukubawan na ako ngayon. Ang kaniyang mga halik sa aking leeg ay patuloy akong binibigyan ng kakaibang kiliti ng sensayon. My breath hitched as my chest falls into waves.

Naramdaman kong matanggal niya ang zipper sa likuran ng aking dress na mabilis niyang nahila kasabay ng pagtanggal ng aking brasier at maisiwalat ang malusog kong hinaharap. Habol ko ang aking hininga at nag-umpisa ng magdeliryo ang aking paningin dahil sa kakaibang sarap ng pakiramdam ang lumulukob sa akin.

He kissed and nipped my hardened peaks as I looked up my head. My mind are started to get lost as his kisses take me into paradise. And when I felt his hand crawled down on my abdomen I felt him stopped there.

He paused and stopped kissing my peaks. Nag-angat siya sa akin ng tingin at nakita ko ang kakaibang dilim roon. His eyes were filled with some unknown sensation of desire. But his lips twitch in controlling himself from taking another flesh of me.

“Blair, are you sure about this?”

Napakurap kurap naman ako habang ang hininga ay habol pa rin. But then, when his eyes darted on me with hesitation, I gulped hard.

I knew that there is something in me that I wanted him. But part of me was doubtful. And looking at his anticipating eyes makes me push myself on the gutter that I shouldn’t anticipate him.

Instead of saying what my heart is beating, I held his jaw and seized it with my lips.

I saw him let a gasped but later on, he’s now started kissing me back. He became aggressive as he devoured me with his hot passionate kisses.

And as long as the night heated, I felt him slid his hand on my dress. Then massage my sensitive clit that sents immediate tingles and throbs by his tickling fingers. It was alluring that I felt my back arched voluntarily.

“Ace…” I called as I sound in a moan.

His eyes darken more as he watches me drown by his enchanted caress. And when I saw his bulge that is brushing against my dress, I arched my body more and flinched as I felt him remove my undies.

Pinakubabawan niya ako at ang mga mata niya ay naliliyo sa dilim na may bakas ng pangamba. And when he reached for my lips again, my hand crawled to his abdomen.

“Blair,” he muttered darkly as I felt him halt my hand from touching him.

Nakita ko ang pag-aalala sa kaniyang mga mata na nakatunghay sa akin.

“Ace…please,” I then uttered like it was on a pleading tone.

Nakita ko namang mag-igting ang kaniyang panga. I moved my body as I can’t seem to see him in a hard time of stopping himself.

“I want you, Ace, I want-” at bago ko pa man matapos ang aking sasabihin ay nahuli na niya ang aking mga labi.

Mas lalong lumalim at hinapos niya ako ng kaniyang mga halik. Habol namin ang isa’t isang hininga habang ang mga labi ay walang humpay sa paghuli sa bawat isa.

His tongue knocking my teeth as I tried to fumble and fight his swirling tongue but ended up being knocked out by his sword-like language. He was teasing and biting my lower lip a bit as I groaned when it sent something salacious on me.

At nang maramdaman kong tuluyan na niyang hilahin pababa ang aking bistida ay nakita ko naman siyang hubarin ang kaniyang damit pang-itaas. He unbuttoned his long sleeve and pants. Then after he unbuckles his belt he unzipped it.

Pinakubabawan niya akong muli at saka niliyo sa kaniyang mga halik sa aking dibdib. And slowly I felt his fingers massage my sensitive clit, teasing me like I’m on urge to spit the hollow churned on my abdomen.

“Fuck, you’re dripping wet.” I heard him groaned darkly as I now started to feel his finger get inside of me.

I shut my eyes tightly when it sent alluring feelings especially when his hand began to slid inside my folds. I bit my lower lip as I commenced in wilderness.

His hot wet kisses on my mounds while he enters another digit of his fingers inside me almost peered my eyes.

“Ohh…Ace…” I was catching my breath when I felt something is lifting me up on highness.

Bumilis ang pag-ulos ng kaniyang mga daliri sa akin kasabay ng pababa niyang mga halik sa aking kaselanan. Halos mapasabunot ako sa kaniyang buhok nang ang kaniyang mga labi ay dumampi sa maselan kong bahagi.

“Ace…” I moaned when I felt something is building up on me.

But he moved, lick, and suck my clitoris like he didn’t heard me in flabbergast. He move faster and faster while his sword tounge swirl and sworn on me. Hindi ko na napigilan pa ang sarili kong mapasabunot sa kaniyang buhok habang ang isa kong kamay ay mahigpit na nakakapit sa bedsheet ng kama.

At nang maramdaman kong hindi ko na kaya pang pigilan ang pagsabog ng aking kaibuturan ay malakas akong napahalinghing sa kakaibang pakiramdam na idinulot niyon sa akin. I feel weak and I flinch when Ace’s mouth ate me like it’s his most favourite food.

At nang lumayo siya sa akin at tuluyan ng ibaba ang kaniyang pants ay hindi ko alam kung paanong muli nabuhay ang apoy sa aking katawan.

My eyes widen a fraction when I saw his manhood sprang free. I swallowed hard when I saw it. It was massive and long.

And then he goes back at the top of me, devouring me his passionate hot wet kisses. His ripped well-toned body was domineering me while his sprang massive long manhood teasing my entrance.

“Ace, ohh…” I groaned when the another anticipation is started to kill me.

He was nibbling my hardened peaks when his kisses went down on my abdomen. He was passionately kissing me down on my folds that he kissed more than once after he gets into it.

“Ohhh,” I moaned when he pokes my entrance again.

Naliliyo ang aking mga matang tumingin sa kaniya nang magtama ang aming mga tingin. His eyes hooded and filled with carnal and erotic desire.

“Blair-”

“P-Please, Ace…” I summoned with my voice in a small and womanly one.

I then licked my lower lip when I felt it getting dry. Madilim at mariin ang kaniyang mga matang nakikita kong liyo at namumungay. At nang maramdaman kong marahan niyang ipasok ang kaniyang kahabaan sa aking kaselanan ay napakislot ako.

Naramdaman ko ang sakit na parang pupunit sa aking kaibuturan.

“Fuck, but it will hurt you baby,” he then mumbled huskily.

“Just p-put it, Ace…” I then muttered and bit my lower lip as I felt him stop when he gets in his half tool inside me.

“Damn, I’m sorry,” he hoarsely said then planted a gentle kiss on my neck to divert the pain he was giving on me.

And when I tried to move my hips he immediately caught my waist and rest it.

“I said don’t move,” he commanded with his voice in stern now.

I bit my lip. He didn’t fully get in his tool inside me but the pain was already too much, what more when he burried himself fully. And it’s sending me different feelings as he takes it for long.

Kaya nang subukan ko muling igalaw ang aking balakang ay nauubusan siya ng pasensyang pinipigilan akong muli sa pagkislot. At nang maubos ang kaniyang pagtitimpi ay ipinirmi niya ang aking dalawang hita mula sa kaniyang magkabilang gilid at naramdaman ko nalang na tuluyan niyang iulos ng buong buo ang kaniyang pagkalalaki sa akin.

He was so gentle and very careful as he pushed himself inside my clitoris. He was holding my hand beside my head as his left hand gripping my waist. He slid himself slowly. It seems like his very cautious about seeing me in pain that he did that like I’m the most fragile that he has to take care, softly and in a very gentle way.

Mariin ang aking pagkakakagat sa aking pang-ibabang labi at pinipigilan ang sariling pumakawala ng isang impit na halinghing.

He was huge that I felt him break me in a half. It was excruciating when he fully get his manhood inside me. Napakapit ako sa bedsheet ng kaniyang kama habang ang mga mata ko ay marahang kumurap at maramdaman ang pagdaloy ng isang luha sa aking pisngi.

“Don’t move, please… I’m sorry baby,” mahina niyang bulong sa aking tainga habang marahang tinataniman ang aking leeg ng malamyos niyang mga halik.

He diverted the pain by his kisses and he never failed. He penetrates me for a minute and when I felt that I can bear the pain, I grind. Naramdaman ko namang pigilin niya akong muli.

“Ace, please…” I said straight into his dark eyes.

I then moved my hips again but this time his eyes became darker. He rested my hips as he slowly started sliding himself inside me. Napatingala ako sa kakaibang kirot at sarap na hatid niyon sa akin.

And when he gets the tempo and I barely endure the pain that immediately replaced by the pleasure he was giving in to me. His pace fasten. At hindi ko na napigilan pa ang halinghing kong walang humpay dahil sa tulin ng naging pag-ulos niya sa akin ngayon.

“Ace. Ohh….”

Hindi ko alam kung saan ako babaling dahil sa kakaibang pakiramdam na idinudulot niyon sa akin.

He was pounding me hard as I get firm my hold on the side of the bedsheet. I started to lose the senses as I began to be found in the paradise he was lifting me into.

His manhood hit me on top. He was huge that when his pace became rougher and tougher, the bed squeak as I feel unconscious of what he is doing because of the intense pleasure he served on me.

“Ace…” I moaned when I felt something in my stomach is building up once again.

“Fuck,” he groaned as he pulled and pushed himself inside me with no inhibitions.

He gripped my waist, his body hammering me. Our body meets halfway as it makes its loud sounds of music. Our skin bumped against each other and ignite by this flare that is continuously flaming.

At nang mas lalo pa niyang binilisan ang kaniyang pag-ulos at paglabas-masok sa aking kaselanan ay naliliyo kong ibiniling ang aking ulo. Mas ibinaon at ipinaramdam niya sa akin ang kakaibang pakiramdam na nagpapawala sa aking ulirat.

And when I felt the building sensation I was keeping to hold on is about to release, ay malakas akong napahalinghing at mahigpit na napakapit sa bedsheet ng kama.

His in and out was now on its pace. I was moaning and he groaned as he buried and slammed himself more inside me. My body was shaking on his every thrust that my mind was blown in some ecstasy of so much pleasure.

“A-Ace, ohhh,” I growled when I felt something inside me is about to explode now.

And in no time, I reached my peaks that my toe curls hardly. My body convulsed as I gripped the bedsheet tightly. Habang siya ay mas lalong bumilis at nag-umigting ang kahabaan sa aking kaibuturan.

He then groaned after he massively burried his manhood then immediately pulled it out as he spits his hot juices on my hollow pit stomach.

“Ohh, fuck,” he groaned while his eyes filled in so much adoration of desire.

We reach our summit chronologically. I am panting as I saw him catches his breath as well. At ngayon ko lang natingnan ng masinsinan ang kaniyang katawan. He has a very nice well-toned body that every girl would love to look at and drool at.

At nang kalaunan ay magtama ang aming mga tingin ay agad niya akong pinakubabawan at dinampian ng malamyos niyang mga halik.

“It’s really you, Blair, I was into you since before.” He huskily whispered in my ears.

Namumungay ang aking mga mata at pagod naman na ang aking kamay nang haplusin ko ang kaniyang panga.

“I like you, Ace. So much…” Mahina kong ani na hindi ko na napigilan ang pagbagsak ng aking mga talukap dahil sa panghihina na bigla kong naramdaman.

“I like you more, Blair. And damn, I’m sorry for keeping you this sharp. I’m sorry for breaking and hurting you painfully tonight.”

Narinig ko iyon kahit na pagod na ang aking katawan at nakapikit na ang aking mga mata.

“It’s alright, Ace. I wholeheartedly give myself to you. And I will give it only to you…”

I heard him gasped. Then planted a soft kissed at the back of my ear.

“Thank you for trusting me. I’m only yours, Blair… And you’re only mine.”