1. Welcome Home

Dylan

“I am never traveling anywhere with you fucking imbeciles ever again.” My dad muttered as he all but threw his suitcases inside and kicked off his shoes at the entryway.

“ Don’t say that, baby

, “ Carson cooed lightly with me and him following my dad further inside the dark penthouse. We’d been gone for a year but my dad had Brad check in on the place from time to time, keeping up with the general maintenance. He’d long since returned from Russia and had spent time in NYC settling some lawsuit with John Terry for Ivanov Corp.

My father had mentioned while in Ireland that the fact Ivanov Corp was still a thing and not ran into the ground with lawsuits was all Brad’s doing over the last eight years Mavericks was partnered with them now for. And honestly, to this day I was still very surprised that dad maintained his longstanding beef with Christian Ivanov in particular.

It was inspiring really.

“Shut the fuck up, Carson,” Dad snapped back at his husband in true Donald Whittaker fashion. “That was the longest flight of my goddamn life. We spent a year in Ireland and the fucking airport was when you to decided you wanted to get memorabilia? You’re lucky I’m not putting you out on the couch tonight and Dylan on the streets of New York.”

“I love you too, Pops.” I chuckled, pushing the suitcases my dad had since abandoned at the entrance, further inside. He was really fucking over both it and Carson and I.

“Are you ready for school?” He then asked, turning back before fully disappearing down the corridor.

“Yes, though I still think I should just start next week,” I argued, to which my dad shook his head immediately.

“I’m giving you one day tomorrow then you will be back in class on Tuesday. Don’t piss me off, kiddo, I am not in the mood for it. Besides, Carson and I are going back to work Tuesday and I already promised you I’ll get you a car this week.” Dad gave that response with a level of irritance that I honestly was beyond used to by now. “I’m going to shower, I suggest you two do the same after I’m done, and go the complete hell to bed. I’ll be meal prepping your lunches tomorrow.”

He didn’t even wait for a reply before he returned towards his room. I was forced to hear for about four hours of our flight how my dad missed his own bed with a desperate passion… so this was also expected.

“He’s just tired,” Carson told me, helping me with grabbing my dad’s suitcase and his. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll fix his mood by tomorrow morning.”

“You two are disgusting,” I muttered, making Carson laugh as he, too, made it towards my dad’s room with their suitcases in tow after kicking his own loafers off… and so I did as I was told, waiting for both of them to finish with the shower while I made it to my room and started to unpack my luggage.

Man, what a long trip.

I knew they were taking a shower together as per usual, however I still slid on a pair of headphones because knowing what I did, Carson was probably fixing that man’s mood right now.

There was a part of me- a large- scratch that, massive part that didn’t want school to start at all.

All I could think of was one guy, and how the hell we left our friendship right before I went off to Ireland.

He hadn’t texted or called me once since then.

Not once.

And I knew it was because of that kiss he had randomly planted on me the night before my flight out, completely terrifying the shit out of me and what this now meant for us as best friends.

Then he just completely ghosted me, not returning a single one of my calls which was shitty because he was the only friend I could think of that I wanted to actually share the entire events of the trip with. My dad and Carson told me it would resolve itself once we got back, but I hadn’t shared the information about the kiss with them. I just told them we argued because of something stupid, and honestly, with that minimal information, I’m sure they thought everything would be fine.

But it wasn’t. This was the longest I had ever been away from him. This was by far the longest we have ever gone without talking. And if I saw him at school, I didn’t know what the hell to do anymore. I didn’t know what I’d even say to him.

The extended vacation was pretty nice, with my dad choosing to homeschool me while I was out, and I still kept communication with other friends, but no one had been as close as Isiah and I were… before he…

Why did he have to go and do that? I couldn’t help but think. He hadn’t confessed feelings for me or anything. He just planted one on me while we were sitting on the couch watching Andor, then fucking bolted from my home without saying anything else, all while I just wanted an explanation. Maybe I missed something between us?

A whole year had now passed with simply no word from him.

I was more grown, like physically. I fucking skyrocketed in height, now almost as tall as my dad and Carson. I had picked up a bit of an Irish accent too since Dad really leant in heavily on his, something Carson couldn’t stop gushing over for our entire year overseas. I also now knew more about who my grandmother was. We had found even more of my dad’s family out there, this being our third trip as a family, to which they welcomed all of us immediately, speaking more of my grandmother and how amazing of a woman she was.

It reminded me of our times at Wilmoria’s Cafe over the years. How Pricilla always spoke of her when Dad and I stopped by a few times a year. It really felt like home with family that shared Dad and I’s eyes. The Dwyer name.

I had changed… and Isiah had missed that entire year of it. I wondered what had happened for him during the year. Whether he had changed, too.

I wanted my dad to ask more questions whenever he was on a call with Isiah’s parents, but it sounded like he had just told his mother that we got into an argument. He hadn’t, as far as I knew, mentioned anything about that kiss… so I didn’t mention it either.

Why? Just why the hell would he go and do something like that?

I stared at my phone while laying in bed waiting for my dads to be done with their intimate moment in the shower, just looking at my unread texts to Isiah. I didn’t know if I should text him that I was back considering he clearly didn’t give a shit, so I decided not to. I guess we’d just… see each other at school? I guess?

“What do you want to eat this week?” My dad asked while I was on the couch looking for something to watch.

I was so fucking happy we threw out that damn couch eight years ago, the one Carson bought was so much better that I honestly couldn’t believe Dad slept on the old one for so many days when I first came to The Alpines. Carson still thanked me to this day for picking out a bed my dad had no business even attempting to build, which was really sweet.

Apparently that was their catalyst for the start of their relationship or some shit, I dunno.

Dad was such a damn softie around Carson, I was genuinely surprised how different they were together. So much so, we still visited Carson’s family in Texas every year for Thanksgiving. At this point I just told them both we might as well get a second home. Carson’s Nan had passed away four years ago which kept us in Texas for a whole month, then there was the ranch expansion which kept his mums in Texas for even longer. So much had changed over the years, but what hadn’t was the horses.

I had my own now for starters, with Carson teaching me how to ride very much to my dad’s dismay, the old man fought long and hard to try and keep me off one, but it was a wrap with Grandpa Ken bought me my own. And I was getting good. Really good, actually. I wondered how much my own horse, Lightning, was doing. Whether he had grown like me. Grandpa Ken said I’d be surprised once we went down again in a few months for Thanksgiving again, and that excited the complete hell out of me.

I wanted Lighting to get as big as Shadow was.

“Italian,” I told my old man, giving him a smile as I stopped cruising through Netflix to go lend a hand. Carson had been right- he was in a much better mood this morning.

“Italian sounds fantastic,” Carson added as he joined us from their bedroom. He was wearing a shirt for a change which told me their prior night had been more than just good. I knew they were intimate often, that whenever a shirt was on meant whatever they had done had left marks in places they were forced by good ol’ Pops to wear, even though they weren’t fooling any fucking one.

Luckily I could distract myself with headphones most nights, giving them their privacy, but they were equally obsessed with each other, the kisses and longing touches they shared was a dead giveaway.

I liked how Carson took care of him though. They’d lasted eight years, yet they acting like both newly weds and an old fucking couple all at the same time, and constantly.

I’d never admit it to them because both their egos were far too large already, but one day I wanted what they had. Carson even signed a prenup, only to put Dad on everything he had without a second thought.

My grandfather was also very sick, most likely anticipated to die this year, and that put my old man in a much better mood. He was never fully honest with me about the abuse he experienced as a kid, and I never did meet his father, but I knew it was something seriously bad for Dad never raised his voice nor a hand to me. Ever. In fact, he had promised that once we got back from our trip, he would show me a move or two at the gym downstairs.

And Pops could fight, that I knew for sure. He had taken me to a bar in Dublin since I was 18 now, while Carson stayed to chat with some of my dad’s family, and it got a bit rowdy there. Good ol Pops showed me first hand that he truly chose to not be a violent person, but if someone started something, he took no issue ending it.

Honestly it was probably the Irish blood in him, cause the pub owner didn’t even bat an eyelash when Dad knocked a man clean out in the middle of the bar for trying to drunkenly fight me out of nowhere.

My mum was also still living at The Alpines with us. She had worked to get herself back on her feet here in New York, and she respected the rules my father had put in place. I never did see that Harry guy again, thank fuck, so that was good riddance.

Dad also never spoke of what he had threatened him with. My dad never spoke about a lot of things, but I trusted and respected what he did and didn’t tell me. He was keeping things safe, and I knew he was rather honest with Carson so that’s all that really mattered.

I got up from the couch to join the man. Some things never changed, and he, myself, and Carson all cooking together was one of them. We all made mostly dinners after their work and my school, and my lunches on Sunday for the week.

“Did you reach out to some friends to let them know we’re back? I think maintaining those connections will help with your final year.” Carson spoke, helping hold the fridge door for Dad while he removed a bunch of ingredients for a tomato based sauce.

“Yeah, I did.” I nodded, accepting the ruffles of hair his large hands tossed tenderly while he gave me a smile. I gave him a smile in return, loving the fact that Carson still treated me just like he always had- the best of fucking friends. No matter how young I was then nor how old I was now.

“Did you manage to get ahold of Isiah?” Pops asked, setting ingredients on the counter while I headed for the sink to wash my hands.

“No…” I said slowly, unsure of what else to really say about that.

“It’ll be fine, kiddo. Say hi to him at school. See if you two can talk it out. You’ve been friends for seven years before Ireland, that’s not something to just throw away.” Dad spoke while Carson joined me at the sink to wash his own hands.

“I agree,” Carson added next to me more gently. “Whatever you two argued about can’t be that bad. Just try to talk to him.”

And I couldn’t help sighing, but I still nodded. I couldn’t tell them what really happened, not before Isiah agreed to speak with me. I didn’t know why he did what he did without even giving me a chance to speak with him about it, but something told me it had to be some kind of misunderstanding.

He was my best friend… and I didn’t want that to change because of this. I just needed to know why.

••

2. First Second Day Of School

Dylan

I did not want to get up for school the following morning… but good ol’ Daddio threatened to drench me in cold water if I didn’t get off my ass and out of bed.

He still had yet to get me a car, so he was going to be driving me to school today and tomorrow then he said we’d head to the dealership on Thursday after he got off work.

I was fine being left alone since I was obviously old enough, yet my dad didn’t give a shit. He still kept the same schedule, with Carson and him leaving Terry Enterprises to get me, then they’d finish up working from home and I worked on homework before we all started dinner together.

Carson still had his other home, however he was almost never there long. We’d stop by his place on the way home about once or twice a week so I could pick out some books from his collection and Carson could water his jungle of a humble abode, then we were off to my dads, and Pops assured me this morning that none of that was changing.

Honestly the way we all fell into a routine felt really… nice. And on the nights my mum didn’t have work, she’d join us for dinner, allowing us to hear more of how everything was going. It was a rocky start for her when she first moved here, but Dad was genuinely the right amount of both strict yet considerate with her.

He wasn’t a man you wanted to piss off, especially not when he didn’t charge her anything for rent here.

“Get a move on!” Dad called from the hallway, forcing me to get up while I was almost immobilized with complete and utter dread, yet every threat he made, the man was good on upholding.

He absolutely would drench me in cold water, and I still didn’t have a lock on my door, so there was literally no stopping him from barging in here with a filled basin.

“I’m up! I’m up!” I assured him before he could even think to act on said threat. Because he would. He really fucking would.

“We’ll be here to pick you up at 2:45PM, got it?” My dad asked from the passenger seat. Honestly he drove so little since Carson always insisted, him stating he loved taking us everywhere, I didn’t understand why I couldn’t just have Dad’s car, but he shut that shit down almost immediately when I asked.

He said a car like that was for someone who made it through college and landed a high paying job, which then in return led us to questioning where I was planning on applying to… and I had no freaking idea yet. He said his old employer could provide a stellar referral, but I was still figuring out what I wanted to study. I had maintained straight A’s my whole life, yet Dad had done a little too great a job at being a father these last eight years with teaching me everything, and now I had choices in everything from Accounting to Culinary School.

My options were unlimited because of every option my dad raised me with, and he told me he would accept any career besides me being an artist. Or a musician.

Apparently that wasn’t high paying enough, and while I know this man loved me, he was for damn sure not planning on having me live with him forever. He made that very, very clear every moment he could.

“Yes, Daddio, same schedule as always.” I replied with a smile.

“Then go finish up this year strong. It should be a breeze for you, especially with the home schooling we did this last year. Just focus, and you’ll get there.” Dad replied, returning my grin through the rear view mirror as I got my backpack and opened the door, giving these two a quick wave on my way out to finally face the music.

Getting dropped off by my parents my senior year was weird when I got my license at sixteen, but I toughed it out anyways since Dad refused to get me a car before Ireland. I barely made it to the front doors before I heard my name being called by a familiar voice.

“Dylan!”

I turned to find Molly jogging up to me on the paved way in. It was already day two, yet this meticulous girl had a preplanned outfit prepared for the next month, so she said on our calls while I was away. Her long auburn hair curled, and her lips tinted red matched it perfectly. I also noticed the blue skirt she picked out, and the soft, fuzzy pink sweater she wore which was a great look on her.

“Hi Molly!” I smiled instantly as she rushed into my arms like I had come back from a deployment or something.

“Jesus, Dylan, what the hell did they feed you in Ireland? You’re like a whole foot taller!”

That made me laugh pretty hard, enjoying her floral scent as I released the much shorter woman. “Yeah, my dad’s been saying I was just a little late with my growth spurt. I guess I just needed to return home for a little while, get some Irish food in me, and bam! My body shot up in months.”

“That’s absolutely insane!” She joined my laughter as we started heading inside together. “Like seriously! Like I know we video chatted while you were overseas but what the complete fuck! Now I feel like a midget. Great.”

“Just fun sized,” I clarified quickly, feeling her arm link with mine. “Who knows, maybe you’re just a late bloomer,” I lied poorly to the young woman. This was absolutely without a doubt her final form, and not an inch taller.

“See now this is why I keep you around. You know just what to lie about to keep me happy. And not to bring down the whole mood but… did you and Isiah finally talk? Does he know you’re back?”

I shook my head no, reaching for the handle to the glass doors to hold open for her, which she thanked me gingerly for.

“I just… I don’t get it,” she said honestly, “I kept thinking maybe he didn’t want you to go to Ireland since we didn’t really know how long you’d stay… but to then not talk to you at all? Like that’s so freaking extreme. I will say… you both sort of changed tremendously within that one year.”

“He did?” I asked quickly, to which she nodded just as quick.

“Yeah… you grew your hair and whole frame out, and he… well… you’ll see.”

“That sounds pretty bad, Molly.”

“Yeah, well… he’s… different. A total bad boy stoner look. He’s also been hanging with that Ryker guy more, which I genuinely hate for him.”

“Ryker? You mean like the same Ryker that’s been suspended more times than I can fucking count? That Ryker?” I asked, slowing my speed as I looked over then down at her. There was no way Isiah was hanging around him. That guy was all types of seriously bad news. Not… not my Isiah at least.

“That’s the one.” Molly confirmed, guiding me towards our assigned lockers. We had been emailed the numbers and code information as well as our schedule last week, and while I loved Molly, there was no way in hell she was in any of the AP classes I signed up for. So our only time to catch up was before class and during transitions between periods.

We had also lucked out because our lockers were just a few apart. She and I managed to get them open easily before putting some of our heavier text books inside to make our backpacks lighter.

“That’s… that’s actually insane. What the hell was he thinking?”

“I honestly can’t tell you,” she replied, “perhaps he wasn’t? I dunno, all I know is that he started hanging with him this last year, and now they’re the closest buds.”

Shit.

Had so much really changed in a year?

Could it?

“Let’s hurry up and get to our classes, then we can meet here more to talk about it after- sound good?” The sweetest gal offered.

I gave her a nod. We’d already shared our class schedule with one another, so I knew my first period was AP Stats while Molly had Biology. She still graciously walked me to mine first, giving me a quick hug before swiftly heading towards a completely different wing of the high school for her period.

And as always, I was one of the first people in class. I took a seat in the middle of the classroom, not too close to the front but not too far back either. Just the middle, which was a safe zone. And the teacher was already at his desk up front, giving me a slight nod.

Shit! It was Mr. Zinfel.

The schedule had just said TBD, and I didn’t catch the name plate on the door itself since the door was already propped open for students to enter at will.

He was known for being one of the most hardheaded teachers at Averin High. Isiah and I were forced to take a semester with him in AP Precalc our Sophomore year and it actually almost broke us.

This was going to be an actual challenge to get through, I thought to myself, but as more students filled in, I recognized the same groups of folks I had in my Freshman and Sophmore year with the Advanced Placement classes I took then. A few kids smiled and waved, noticing I was back in town now, but most kept quiet once they figured out who we got stuck with as a teacher.

This man was a goddamn menace.

And he barely waited for everyone to take a seat before closing the door to his classroom as soon as the bell rang, then he proceeded to lead us through some standard introductions.

“Today we will begin with the class syllabus. I was selected as the permanent teacher for this class this morning, and I do not have a seating chart because I believe you all to be enough of adults to not need one… but that can change at any moment if I feel it needs to. Act accordingly.”

He began to hand out stacks of paper to the whole first row, having them pass it backwards. I noticed the guy in front of me was named Jacob, and he and I were pretty casual friends. If Isiah was gone a day for a doctors appointment or the likes, I’d usually buddy up with him because he was one of the smartest in my classes, though his notes were a whole goddamn mess.

I genuinely did not know how his brain managed to operate with such discombobulation.

I thought briefly of asking how he was doing for senior year, yet I kept my mouth fucking shut, not wanting to draw any attention to me from this teacher. Silence was the only option for survival.

We had just about passed out all the papers when we suddenly heard the door to the teachers classroom open. It was so quiet in here already, you could hear a pin drop, let alone the roaring rusted hinges connecting the thick wood to the frame.

And when my eyes cast upwards with the rest of the class and its teacher to see who in the hot hell would enter Mr. Zinfel’s class late, I found myself fumbling with before dropping my pencil onto the desk, the sound echoing through the otherwise quiet.

“Mr. Jacobs. A familiar face. Your tardiness will be a mark on your record. Two more times and I will deny your entry into this classroom, is that clear?”

I could only watch in clear fucking astonishment as the guy walking into the classroom mumbled a “whatever,” the teachers way, grabbing the syllabus Mr. Zinfel extended to him as he did, but I didn’t give a rats ass about the personality I surely didn’t recognize. I didn’t recognize this person as a whole.

His brunette hair was cut short, long at the top with buzzed slits on the sides. He had his ears pierced now, with two small diamond earrings shimmering in this bullshit fluorescent overhead lighting, and they honestly accentuated his hazel-green eyes. But what surprised me the absolute most, were the tattoos on his arms that could be seen by the short sleeved shirt under a leather jacket when he slid his backpack off his shoulders before pulling off the jacket itself near the entrance.

I couldn’t stop staring at every new part of his look. He had also grown a little- well, more built than before with visible muscles on his arms. And since he was the last one to enter this classroom, he took one of the only seats available towards the back, forcing him to pass by me on the way, yet when his eyes found mine, he slowed to an almost complete stop… just looking at me.

I felt my breathing fucking hitch, lodging that air in my chest, unable to look away, but it only lasted a moment before he pulled that gaze and continued on to his seat.

I… I didn’t know what to make of it.

Him.

I didn’t know how someone could change so fucking much in such a short time. It had only been one year.

My gaze followed him all the way to his seat, forcing me to crane my neck to look back at him, but he avoided even glancing in my direction, and it was the sounds of Zinfel continuing to review the syllabus that forced my attention back to the front.

I didn’t know who that man was… but he wasn’t the Isiah I knew. Not by a long shot.

••

3. Starting Late And Hardly Staying

Isiah

“What ya doing after this? I say we just ditch class.” Ryker spoke, tossing his cigarette outside his car window.

“No can do,” I replied, tossing my own cigarette out the open window on the passenger door side, “my mum will kick my ass.”

Ryker scoffed at that. “Still afraid of your momma? Come on, Isiah.”

“If you met the woman, you’d fear her too. She let me get these tattoos but was pretty damn clear I couldn’t let shit slip with school. I’m taking more AP courses.”

Ryker scoffed again. “You don’t need that shit, Izzy. I already told you I’d get you job at my dad’s car shop after graduation. I’ll hook you up, man.” He insisted, but I shook my head again.

“Seriously, no can do. It was a trade off for the change in my look. You want to convince her, go for it.”

“I’m not talking to your momma, Izzy. Be fucking for real. You really think a guy like me is someone anyone wants to bring to their parents? Fuck that.”

So I simply shrugged at the man. If he didn’t want to then that was that. I wasn’t convincing that woman of shit, not with the last year we had. She already thought I was smoking pot and killing my brain cells, which I was. Smoking pot that is. I had to prove I wasn’t killing brain cells too.

“Listen, I gotta go man. I’ll see you after classes.” I told Ryker, to which he only nodded, watching me pick up my book bag before leaving his car.

“I’ll see you after, yeah?” He called out before I shut the door, to which I gave him a firm nod before walking inside the school building.

I was already going to be late as shit, but when I caught sight of the name on my first period’s class door, I immediately fucking groaned.

Damn it… Zinfel.

This was absolutely going on my record, but I didn’t have any way to avoid it. Zinfel was known for being a complete douchebag, which forced me to take a breath before I opened that classroom door.

And as suspected, he had already begun class.

“Mr. Jacobs.” Zinfel spoke as soon as I walked through the door. “A familiar face. Your tardiness will be a mark on your record. Two more times and I will deny your entry into this classroom, is that clear?”

Fucking great. I grumbled a “whatever” before reaching for the syllabus in his hand. It was dead fucking silent as everyone just stared at me in complete horror, but I was far more focused on just finding a seat and getting this day the hell over with.

And during said search as my eyes locked on a seat in the back, these hazel-green eyes met a particular set of eyes that almost made my whole body freeze the hell up.

They were those light blue eyes, ones I recognized instantly.

He was back.

Shit. Shit, he was back .

Fuck… fuck!

I hadn’t expected him back. Shit… and he had grown. His hair had grown. His face fucking matured more in the last year, with his angled features making him ridiculously more fucking handsome.

Shit.

I could feel it. My heartbeat. What this man did to it.

Shit.

Just keep walking, Isiah . I told myself. Just make it to your damn seat. Don’t look at him, just make it there befor Zinfel says anything.

And so I did, damn near ripping my gaze away- forcing it to the open seat as I passed him.

I needed to keep a healthy distance. I needed to not even acknowledge him. I needed to be done with this- I was done with this.

And I could feel his intense gaze on me as I sat down, but I refused to acknowledge it. I just kept my gaze locked forward at Zinfel to avoid any attention, and eventually, Dylan turned his gaze forward again as Zinfel continued walking us through his expectations for this school year.

This was by far the longest fucking class I had ever had to sit through. And staring at the back of Dylan’s head, at his shaggy longer dark brown hair that looked incredible to touch, did not fucking help.

Jesus, fuck. When did he get back?

He hadn’t… he hadn’t texted me-

Well of course he hadn’t, I reminded myself, thinking of all the texts and calls I had flat out ignored. Of course he didn’t even bother.

Shit.

Once I heard that bell, I quickly grabbed my things and placed them in my book bag, hoping to get the fuck out of here before Dylan, but right as I stood, my vision panned up to the man blocking my path. To the man with that dark longer hair and bright blue eyes as he looked down at me.

Jesus, he’d grown so tall. He had gotten more toned- muscular, his shoulders broad and sturdy built. I couldn’t ignore any part of him, noticing he was starting to dress more like Carson every year, the faded jeans and soft cotton t-shirts.

“Hi,” he spoke quietly. His voice had gotten deeper too, causing my heart to fucking flutter. Shit shit shit shit shit.

“Hey.” I replied, trying to keep my tone light.

“What’s… what’s up? I’m back. Like from Ireland.”

“Yeah,” I replied rather nonchalantly. “I can see that.”

“Yeah,” he replied, and I watched with a scary amount of intent as he crossed his arms across his chest, showing more of just how toned he had gotten. “I was hoping that we could maybe talk?”

Shit. “There’s nothing to talk about.” I told him. “You’re back. I can see that.”

“Please, Isiah,” Dylan’s voice dropped lower, damn near making me shiver. “Please, just talk to me so I can fix it.”

Fuck. I needed to get out of here now. “I’ve got a class to get to across the building. I need to go.”

And that was when I saw Dylan visibly give up on this. He silently stepped to the side, allowing me past him down the aisle. I had gotten just close enough to get a whiff of his cologne, and that shit almost made me light headed. I needed to get out of here right now.

I didn’t even give Dylan a second to say anything else as I practically bolted out of that classroom. And I didn’t even attempt to make it to the second period. Instead, I pulled out my phone and made a phone call.

“What’s up?” Ryker asked into the line.

“Come pick me up. I’m skipping today.”

“Damn man, for real?” He asked. I could already hear the roar of his car’s engine in the back.

“Yes for real. Come to the back lot, I’ll leave through the side door.”

“You got it. I’ll be there in 5.” I could hear the happiness in his voice before the line cut off, and I rushed myself out of that damn building. I couldn’t be here anymore.

Ryker stuck to his word and pulled up minutes later, allowing me to hop in his beater that absolutely reeked of weed.

Fuck, my mum was going to kill me when she found out.

“So what made you decide to skip?” He asked, handing me a cigarette as he drove us out of the high school compound.

“You’re right. School is bullshit. I’ll deal with my mums wrath once I get home. Let’s just drive somewhere and smoke. I’d like to forget about things for a while.” I told him, to which Ryker gave me a nod before running a hand through his short potch black hair, and passing me a lighter for my cigarette.

There was no way I was going to talk to Ryker about this. I couldn’t talk to anyone, and the one person I had talked to everything about, I completely ruined our friendship with just one mishap. Now I was in the car of a drug dealer, heading god knows where to get high because if I couldn’t talk about it, I wanted to forget everything happened at all. I couldn’t control myself around Dylan, nor explain away why I did what I did.

I had acted on an urge when I knew there was no way in hell the man felt the same. And now he was back from Ireland, had only gotten ten fucking times hotter with the slightest Irish accent. He had gotten so tall, and the way he looked at me… like he was staring at a complete stranger. It was way too fucking much right now.

And so I let Ryker take me wherever he wanted. Which ended up being his father’s shop.

I’d been here a few times before but I was never really a fan. Ryker’s father was a rough looking fella who drank all day and chatted with other workers at the shop, working on cars. I didn’t know what exactly about his business that I felt was sketchy, but the vibes were just all wrong.

Today, however, I didn’t question it as he pulled the car into the parking lot and we got out. Ryker had had me roll up a blunt while he drove, and this was what he sparked up as soon as we got out.

“My guy! Skipping again today?” His father asked, wiping grease on his wife beater. He was a tall, broad, bald headed guy completely covered in tattoos like Ryker was. And he already had a beer in hand once we entered the shop, with Ryker passing me the blunt once it was good and burning.

“Yeah, senior year so I don’t give a shit.” Ryker replied while I inhaled the thick smoke, allowing it to burn the back of my throat.

“Fair. Y’all want a beer?”

“Hell yeah.” Ryker spoke for both of us, leading us to the couch inside the shop towards the back room before we both sat down. The three other workers working gave us a head nod, to which we returned while Ryker’s dad Simon walked to the fridge in the back to hand us two chilled beers, cracking them open with his teeth.

I wasn’t much on drinking, but today I didn’t care. I accepted that beer quickly, taking some swigs of it almost immediately before passing off the blunt to Simon.

“Damn,” Simon noted quickly, “long day, huh?”

“He only made it to one period,” Ryker laughed, his voice raspy as was his father’s.

“The first week is all just syllabus. It’s a throw away week anyway,” I replied, already feeling the effects of the beer and weed. It was a quick fix- a bandaid on a massive wound, but I had needed something quick regardless of how I knew it would solve absolutely nothing.

But I still stayed in that shop with Ryker and his father the entire day, us all getting a good buzz going with beer and weed. Simon moved to some harder stuff, and I knew that because of how he continued sniffling when he returned from his office, but he didn’t offer any of that to us, and I was grateful for it. I wanted to get fucked up, but I still needed to go home and deal with my mum.

She was going to skin me the fuck alive. Genuinely. And I couldn’t explain it to her. I couldn’t tell her what I was feeling- what I felt around Dylan. What urges I had with him. She couldn’t know, which meant I was going to have to think of something that would explain me skipping otherwise it would surely be my own funeral.

I was a legal adult now but she didn’t care. She just wanted better for me. Better for me than what she had worked damn hard to provide, and I knew that.

I knew that.

And me knowing that just made me drink more, so I was grateful to not be offered anything stronger. Perhaps because I knew there was a very good chance that I’d say yes.

••

4. The Real Truth

Carson

Dylan had barely spoken all afternoon once we picked him up.

I and Don tried hard to get him to open up, but he wouldn’t. He also skipped dinner, but I was just grateful he brought back empty Tupperware from his lunch, so Don and I had to let it somewhat go. I assured my handsome husband that the kid was just having a rough day for a teenager. He hadn’t seen any of them in a year, and just letting him retreat to his room was good for now.

If it persisted, then we could intervene, but it was a bit hypocritical for us to completely get on his case when Don and I had had our fair share of rough days with taking a year off from work, managing the apartment rentals, and taking care of Lisa. It wasn’t fair that Dylan didn’t get some bad days of his own.

While Dylan remained in his room, Don took a shower after me to prepare for bed while I was already in bed, ready to feel him against me. That kid was old enough to keep himself busy while Don and I took care of our… urges , allowing us the most active sex life. Don got clingy whenever we took too long to touch each other, and we had barely done anything in Ireland, which was why his mood was so damn sour on that flight home.

But now we were home. Now I could take care of every need of that stubborn man.

I noticed Don’s phone vibrating on his dresser but I ignored it, thinking it was a work call… that was until my own phone started ringing. And when I caught sight of the caller ID, I felt my eyebrows furrow.

“Hi Sheila, what’s up?” I asked as I answered. She usually texted honestly but seeing as she called Don and me, I was concerned. “Is everything okay with Isiah?”

And there was a slight pause on the other end before she sighed. “Honestly, no Carson, and I don’t know what to do. He skipped school and came home drunk and high. Nick is out for a few days on a hunting trip and I’m at wits end on what to do. The kid won’t talk to me.”

I sighed at that. Shit. So both these kids were going through it today.

“That doesn’t sound like Isiah at all.” I told her honestly.

“I know. And I don’t know how to get through to him. I have half the mind to just kick him out, but I can’t abandon him like that. I also can’t have him stumbling home drunk and high on a school night. I can’t have him fucking up his attendance record.”

“I understand.” I sat up in bed a little more. “Do you mind leaving him with your phone? Is he still up? Let me try and see what’s going on.” I asked gently, to which Sheila sighed again.

“Yeah. Let’s give it a shot. Sorry for dumping all this on you so late at night.”

“Please don’t ever hesitate to call. Isiah is like a son to us too, and Dylan has been very moody today. We had tried to tell him to talk to Isiah but perhaps it didn’t go so well. Let me at least try.”

“Alright, and thank you. Give me just a second-” there was some rustling on the line before I heard her say in the background “here, it’s Carson. Bring the phone back to me when you’re done. And drink all that fucking water on your bedside.” I then heard a little more shuffling before I heard Isiah’s voice.

“Hello?” He asked me. I could already tell he was drunk just from how he slurred that one word.

“Hey man, what’s up?”

I kept my tone casual. I didn’t want to scare him, and Isiah and I had had so many conversations between us two, I wanted him to know this was more like a friend checking in, and less like a goddamn interrogation.

“Nothing. Just about to head to bed.”

“Nice. You should get some rest. Your mum said you missed some school, did you get enough sleep? I know the first week back is always an adjustment.”

“Y-Yeah… I did, I just… I’m having a hard time adjusting.” He replied, however his words were coming through a bit more clear now.

“I understand,” I nodded as if he was sitting right in front of me, just chatting like old times. “Did you try talking to Dylan about it? He’s also adjusting after being gone for a year, and I think he could use a friend.”

“I… I can’t, Carson.”

“I doubt that,” I spoke lightly. “He’s been missing you for a whole year. There’s been no one like you in his life like this. I mean Don and I try our best, but you two were inseparable. Whatever it is can be resolved-”

“I fucked up. Like badly.” His words interjected my own, causing me to pause.

“… how badly is badly?”

“You cannot tell a living soul,” Isiah rushed out quickly, making me sit up more in this bed, “but I’m… I’m like… I’m like… well sort of in love with him. With Dylan.”

That made me pause fucking immediately.

Well… shit.

“And the last day we saw each other- the movie night… I sort of, well… I sort of kissed him.”

“… oh…” was all that fell past my fucking lips. This was… far more fucking complicated than I originally assumed. “Well did you two… did you like talk about it with him?”

“… no,” Isiah sighed quietly. “I just left. Abruptly. And we haven’t spoken since.”

It was my time to sigh deeply. This was not what I was expecting. This wasn’t something they could just mull over. “So you two didn’t speak about it at all? You just kissed him then left?”

“Yeah,” Isiah’s voice was now so small with his response that it fucking broke my heart honestly. He was struggling with a hell of a lot more than just a minor disagreement.

“Do you want my honest opinion?” I asked with even more gentleness in my voice.

And Isiah spoke in a hushed tone, “you’re going to say I should talk to him.”

“You guessed correct. Do you… well if he doesn’t feel the same, do you think you can still be friends?”

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. Genuinely, “Carson, I have no fucking idea. I saw him in my class for the first time today in a year and I just felt my heartbeat quicken immediately. I felt my hands get clammy, and my breathing harden. I know you don’t want to really hear this, but he got even more handsome over the last year, and it’s fucking killing me to miss him this hard but force myself to stay away.”

Jesus , he really was going through it. I could hear the breaking in his voice.

“He was… he was who I told everything to, Carson, and I don’t know to honestly make it through without someone like that.”

“Well, I don’t… I mean I think he feels that way, too. I cann’t speak on the being in love part, but he loved your friendship and really struggled in Ireland without it. Just… talk to him. I won’t say anything about us speaking, but he does deserve to know what happened that night when you kissed and then left so suddenly. Perhaps you two can find a way to work through it.”

“I’m just… I’m scared. I’m scared of him rejecting me. I’m scared of my mother finding out. Hell, I’m scared of what people at school would think.” Isiah explained softly.

Yeah, those fears were all pretty valid honestly. “Perhaps maybe try talking to your mum, or Nick? Support at the home is important, and remind you, Dylan has two dads. I don’t think he’d be mad at you for anything. He might not have romantic feelings but if you can work this out, you would still be a great support for each other.”

“I know. I don’t know how to describe what I’m feeling to him without scaring him, though.”

“Okay,” I nodded more to myself. Lord, what a shit show this predicament was . “Maybe just start with having feelings. Maybe explain when you developed them. Just ease into it, yeah? This is the most important friendship to you both and I want you guys to at least try to talk. You can’t just not explain anything, I think it’s really eating him up inside.”

At this point I needed Don back in this room pronto. I had not been expecting this tonight.

“Okay. I’ll try to take your advice. I’m sorry I’m bothering you with all this.”

“It’s no bother,” I rushed out. “If you need to talk about it, you have Don and I’s numbers, just call us any time, I’ll keep this conversation from Dylan and your parents for now but no more skipping class, alright?”

“Yes sir,” he replied more assertively.

“And lay off the booze and weed. I can’t stop you from trying that stuff, but it’s a slippery slope. Don’t get yourself in situations where it can leave you defenseless, or potentially hurt others. Got it?”

“Yes sir… and Carson?”

“Yes?”

“Thank you for listening.”

“Anyday, anytime, kiddo. Sleep it off in time for school. It’s just one year left.”

“I know,” he whispered low. “Trust me, I know.”

I waited for Don to finish up in the shower and join me before I decided to get shit off my plate.

“We need to talk,” I told him right away, though I was momentarily distracted when he dropped his towel and found some briefs. Dear fucking god he was as beautiful as the first day I laid eyes on him. All of him.

“Carson,” Don sighed as he crawled into bed, “Please, I am so goddamn tired. Can it wait till morning?” He begged.

“For you I’d usually say yes but this one’s kinda big. I just got off the phone with Isiah.” That made Don hesitate to snuggle up into me.

“Isiah?” He asked, his eyebrows creasing slightly. “Is he alright? Does he need us to pick him up from somewhere or something? I can put clothes back on.”

“No, no… this is a rather delicate situation, and Dylan can’t know that we know.”

“It involves Dylan?” He asked, concern lacing even more of his voice.

“I think I know why Isiah stopped talking to him completely. As it turns out, Isiah… well … he kissed him that day before we left for our trip. The poor kid just confessed to me over the phone that he thinks he’s in love with him, and that he panicked and left right after the kiss.”

I watched as Don’s eyes got wide, before he brought his long fingers to the bridge of his and sighed, closing his eyes.

“I’m getting way too old for this shit, Carson.” He mumbled to me as he sat across from me on this bed.

“I know, love. Also you’re only 46. And that fucking body of yours…” my eyes dipped to his exposed chest, taking in the marks I left all down his neck and shoulders and chest and stomach, to which Don yanked a free pillow off his bed to cover himself up.

“Focus, you fucking pervert,” he snapped at me which just made me chuckle. “What the hell can we do? Is Isiah capable of being friends if Dylan doesn’t feel the same? Honest I thought the kiddo was asexual, I mean he never brought anyone home to us before in a romantic setting. Just his friends.”

“I know. That’s why I’m worried. I think Isiah really fucking loves him. Like bad. I just basically told him to talk to Dylan. Just try and work out a way they could still be friends. Does that sound right?”

“I mean…” Don paused a moment. “What else is there. You and I surely aren’t speaking a fucking word of this to Dylan. It should come from Isiah. Does Sheila know?”

“No, and we can’t tell her either. Isiah told me in confidence and I promised we’d stay out of it until they spoke.” I told him.

“Good grief,” he muttered. “Alright, we’ll just monitor Dylan and see how things go, I don’t fucking know. Today has left my brain as mush so we’ll just roll with that for now.” And I found myself nodding before reaching forward to pull away that damn pillow, then I reached for this man next.

••

5. A Step In The Right Direction

Dylan

I dreaded going to school the next day.

I had three classes with Isiah total, AP Stats, AP Chem, and AP World History, but he didn’t show up for the other two, and I had spent the rest of the day worrying that I was the reason why. That our conversation, however brief it was, had pissed him off.

It was unlike him to ever skip a class, but I didn’t see him anywhere in the school after first period, so I assumed he just left.

That, in return, put me in a mood that left me feeling like not speaking with anyone. Not even Molly, though I did still meet with her after each period to get the rundown at our lockers because there really was no fat chance in hell we were ever going to share a class. I also sort of needed someone to lean on who knew more of the situation between Isiah and I. She didn’t know about the kiss, but she knew how rough this year was for me without having him there.

Regardless of how I felt, Carson still got me out of bed, insisting that I go, and hopefully get ready before my dad got up. Apparently they had a long day at the office, and a longer night, so I did what I was told and let Carson fix breakfast for us while my Pops got up later.

The morning was a fairly quiet one, as was that car drive. Neither man really bothered me with any questions, and my dad seemed like he was barely holding his head up, though I noticed he still looked as pristine as usual in his four piece suit, while Carson just went with a dress shirt, a tie, and some dress pants.

I still made sure to say my goodbyes, though before I could leave, my old man stopped me.

“Here,” he said, reaching back behind the passenger car seat to dangle a set of keys, surprising both Carson and I immediately .

“Are you… are you serious?” I asked in complete disbelief.

“No, seriously, love, are you serious?” Carson added in mirrored utter disbelief.

There was no fucking way in hell that he was-

“ Don’t make me regret it . If you crash the fucking thing, I will skin you the fuck alive, got it?“

“Yes!” I rushed out as I grabbed the keys quickly. “Oh my god, thankyouthankyouthankyou! I love you! You are the best Dad ever!”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” my dad muttered, but he gave me a smile. “School, and home. No funny business, no detours, got it? Carson and I need to start going in earlier and leaving later for work, so this is me placing my literal baby in your care. Treat it like one would treat a literal god, and I’ll give you an allowance to make sure the tank is always full.”

That made Carson raise his eyes greatly, but I just grinned like a madman. “You are literally the best father in the fuck-freaking world, thank you!”

“Yeah, alright, now remember that shit when I scold you. And I expect dinners to at least be prepped before we get home. And your school work done, got it?”

“Yes!” I nodded excitedly. This old man had just single-handedly made my whole goddamn year with this.

“Good. Now get out and go start the day. We’ll be here when you’re out to drop you home, then Carson and I have to get back to the office for a meeting. You’ll start driving yourself tomorrow.”

“Aye aye cap’in,” I nodded quickly, placing the keys in my school bag before exiting that vehicle immediately. I didn’t want to give him any chance to take this back, even though I knew he wouldn’t. My dad didn’t go back on his decisions like that, however if I so much as dinged the damn thing, he would absolutely kill me.

And I still remembered that moment in the lobby of The Alpines all those years ago, when I took his hand. When he told Danise he’d let her know when I was ready for the bus…

He’d been driving me to school ever since then, never once bringing it up again. My dad was like that, though. Things that went unsaid were still somehow heard with him, and I loved him for it- for the adjustment he made to just make this work for us.

I rushed into school, meeting up with Molly quickly on the way in.

“You will never guess what the hell my dad just gave me!” I gushed to her as I held the door open for her and a few other students making it in early like we usually did. 

“What?” She asked excitedly, to which I reached into my bag to pull out the set of keys. “Oh my god, you’re joking! Not his SUV!”

“I’m so dead serious! I guess they’ll be having longer nights so I can’t really blame him but like- holy shit!”

“We have to go for a little joyride after school tomorrow,” she insisted, but my eyes quickly narrowed at her.

“And put myself on a damn blacklist with my father? Absolutely not. The joy ride can be you coming home with me, though, it’s for school and home only, no detours.”

Molly pouted as we approached our lockers, but she eventually nodding, knowing good and damn well that there was no way in hell I was jeopardizing this freedom with my Pops. She’d also met him more than a handful of times to know no one wanted to make his damn shitlist.

As I opened my locker, I noticed a small piece of paper fall from it. “What’s that?” Molly asked as I reached for it.

“No idea,” I told her honestly, but once I flipped the paper over, a smile quickly spread across my lips.

Meet me at the bleachers during lunch period. Let’s talk

-I

God, this put the biggest fucking smile on my lips as I handed it over to show Molly, who then shared in that smile as she read it.

“He finally wants to talk!” She exclaimed excitedly.

“I know! I… I don’t know why, but fuck it, I don’t really care why either. I’m just happy he reached out.” And he had done so the way we did when we were younger- when Isiah didn’t have a phone yet. This had also meant that he was at school today, and in earlier than I had been. And he wanted to meet where we used to for lunch our freshman and sophomore year, where I would share my lunches with him.

Good , I thought. He didn’t want to make Zinfel’s shitlist for the year either, that I was sure of, regardless of how he acted when he walked in yesterday.

“Well come on, then! Looks like today is looking up for you!” Molly’s excitement was contagious, I couldn’t shake this smile as I slid the note in my front pocket, got my school shit situated, and joined Molly as she escorted me to class.

Sure enough, as soon as I pulled open Zinfel’s classroom door, saying a quick goodbye to Molly and pulling her in for a hug, there amongst the few students inside was none other than Isiah Jacobs.

He was wearing a long sleeve faded shirt and some black jeans, with his leather jacket hanging over the back of his chair, and he was looking down at something purely focused. His hair still had that edgy cut that took me by surprise, but I had long since settled on the fact that I liked it.

I made my way quickly to him, taking the seat right next to him, which pulled his gaze away from his notes to look over at me. “D-Dylan,” he spoke, practically whispering since this class was dead quiet otherwise.

“Hey,” I gave him a smile, but told myself to contain it. I didn’t want to seem as eager as I felt just to be able to talk to him again.

“Hi,” he whispered back as his intense eyes studied me a moment. “Did you get my note?”

I nodded quickly, reaching down into my book bag for my own classwork. “Bleachers. Lunch.” And when my eyes reconnected with his, he nodded.

“Okay, yeah… good.”

Honestly I had no idea where to carry the conversation from here, but I did notice that those eyes of his looked a bit worn. Had he not slept well? Well he had to have gotten up very early to make it to school before 7:15AM, and he was still dressed well, his incredible cologne filling the space around him. And his hair looked a little damp still from a shower.

“What are you working on?” I asked quietly, not wanting this to end so soon. He glanced down at his own papers before meeting my gaze again.

“Honestly… I missed some school yesterday. I’m trying to catch up.”

“Oh, I gotcha,” I answered far too quickly, reaching down in my backpack again for both AP Chem and AP World History work. “Here are my notes for Chem and World History, just take advantage of Zinfel’s yapping and copy them.” I passed over my legal pads to him, which his hand hesitated slightly before accepting.

“We… we took fucking notes? Jesus, it was only day two.” He muttered as he placed my work on his desk and got out his own notebooks for the classes.

“Yeah they jumped right in. No foreplay or anything,” I joked lightly, but Isiah’s face had gotten a little redder as he forced a chuckle.

Shit.

Shit, I had made him uncomfortable.

“Anyways just let me know if you have issues with my chicken scratch.” I rushed out in an attempt to change the subject.

And that did successfully earn me a more honest chuckle. “You take the most meticulous notes I’ve ever seen. And your handwriting is perfect, unless something has changed in a year-” he cut himself short right at the mention of my trip.

Shit. “Nothings changed,” I assured him more gently, however I could see Zinfel standing from his desk to start class. “ Nothing .“

And that earned me a genuine smile as Isiah only nodded.

We didn’t talk for the rest of class, yet that was pretty expected since it was Zinfel. I did catch Isiah writing like a goddamn mad man however, working to get my notes copied whilst we sat through my day fucking two of a syllabus run down. I did not know how it was possible to make this last a whole other class period, but I was happy it gave Isiah time to catch up with my work.

I was happy he was using my work. That he trusted it, because he was always better at Chem and History.

And that comment about my notes kept a smile on my face damn near the whole day.

My second and third period was AP Art History and Honors Calculus, classes I didn’t have with Isiah, but my fourth class was AP Chem, and sure enough, Isiah was one of the first people in class, which left me with the option to grab the seat next to him again. I didn’t know if I was pushing things, but this was another class we didn’t really get to talk in anyways.

And the first thing he did was hand me back my notes with another genuine smile. “You saved my ass this morning. Thank you, seriously.”

I nodded, feeling that genuine warmth spread as I accepted the notes and placed them back in my backpack. “Anytime.” I assured him with a smile of my own. After this was lunch, and frankly, I couldn’t fucking wait. I wanted us to be what we were so freaking badly it almost hurt. I had gotten to this class almost right before the bell, though, so we didn’t really talk much before the class started.

The teacher had mentioned through the period something about a partner project we’d be working on in the coming weeks, and though I wanted to glance over at Isiah to confirm that he and I could work on it together, I told myself not to push it. Him. I decided I’d just mention it in passing over lunch and see what he said.

We still hadn’t even talked yet, and we probably needed to get that out the way first.

I didn’t even know what he was planning to say.

••

6. The Bleachers

Isiah

God my heart was fucking pounding.

It had been beating out my damn chest literally all day from waking up at the ass crack of dawn to have my mum drive me to school on her way to work, to placing that note in Dylan’s locker. I had admittedly woken Molly up to ask which one was his, then begged her repeatedly not to say anything to him about it.

And when Dylan finally entered first period, and took a seat right next to me, it was his scent that pulled me from the notes I had been trying to review from Jacob. More like decipher actually, since his notes were always just gibberish.

I couldn’t contain that warm feeling I got when Dylan and I said hi. When he offered up his own notes that were always so perfectly structured, I didn’t even know how he did it for every damn class.

And he looked perfect today. Just literally perfect, in everything from the light blue jeans to cashmere sweater, a look more like Don than Carson this time. His long hair was freshly washed and styled in that messy way I literally fell in love with, as those light eyes matched the color of his jeans, contrasting fully by his dark hair.

I had thought he just forgot them yesterday, but I think he was wearing contacts now, and I couldn’t help but stare at just how clear those eyes of his were when he looked at me.

It was a rough decision between staring at him all day, and working to get his notes copied, but I chose the notes. I had promised my mum this morning that I would catch up on everything I missed yesterday. And I had made promises to Carson last night that I intended to keep- hence the note in Dylan’s locker.

We couldn’t talk much in our classes, however I noticed he was hesitantly playing with the hem of his sweater when our teacher mentioned a paired project. I wanted to ask him right then and there, but we had to talk first. We needed to talk first, and as Chem came to a quick close, I could feel my fucking heart take literal flight at meeting at the same spot we used to. The bleachers.

Dylan had stopped to talk with our Chem teacher, so I left before he did and grabbed my lunch from my locker then headed outside. I was so tired this morning, I had no idea what I packed, but I didn’t feel like taking a lunch tray out to the bleachers so I quickly threw a sandwich of some sort together and called it a day.

Luckily, it was nice out, too. A sunny day warm enough to sit out, but not too warm. I liked that since Dylan had worn a sweater. And as I walked up the middle section of the bleachers and sat down, it wasn’t long before I heard someone else climbing up the metal stairs to join me.

I still couldn’t get over how tall this man had gotten. How just- how fucking good he looked. I had to tell myself to think of our friendship over and over and over again to try and squash these rather unholy thoughts- thoughts I shouldn’t have had for him, but did.

Carson had really made it clear that I had hurt Dylan. Greatly. And I spent the night practically hating myself for my actions and how I handled everything. Dylan had did nothing wrong, and yet he wanted to fix it.

He was always like that, and I promised him long ago that we’d always communicate. This last year though, I broke that sacred promise in the worst ways possible.

I could do this, I thought to myself. I could do

“Hi,” Dylan smiled down at me before taking a seat right beside me.

“Hey,” I gave him a small but honest smile, yet I did shift over some slightly when I felt him sitting too close. Instead I put my lunch bag between us and Dylan did the same, not seeming to mind. He and I needed physical fucking space at all times if I was to get the hell through this without have a heart attack.

“Thank you for wanting to talk.” He told me. “What’s on the menu?” He then gestured to the lunch bag I was opening while he opened up his.

“A sandwich of some sort. How about you?”

“Italian,” he replied. “Cacio e Pepe. Would you like some? Like… like old times?” He asked, calling my attention to the large dish he had packed with a water and an apple inside.

I couldn’t help but nod, especially when he opened it up and the delicious smell instantly hit me. “Fuck, I’ve missed Don and your cooking so much,” I whispered, causing the most beautiful smile to spread across his face. Shit.

Shit .

“Here,” he insisted, unwrapping and placing a fork inside. “Take the first bite and tell me what you think. I took lead on this one with my old man chaperoning.”

I couldn’t help but smile as I accepted the large dish, digging the fork into the spaghetti and twisting, before bringing it to my mouth. And my good lord, I instantly moaned in approval.

I had missed this so much . Everything about this. About him .

“Good, yeah?” Dylan asked, to which I swiftly nodded.

“So fucking good, oh my god,” I practically whined, causing Dylan to lightly laugh. Even his laughter had gotten more perfect- jesus .

“Help yourself, my dad keeps packing enough to feed a family of five since I… well I grew a little taller this last year.” Dylan admitted.

“Yeah, no shit. You’re almost as tall as him.” I mumbled between bites of food. That made Dylan laugh harder, and his deeper chuckles- Lord . I tried to focus more on the food.

“Yeah, late growth spurt. Do you have anything unhealthy in yours?”

I paused a moment to think, before passing the bowl into one hand and reaching in my own bag with the other and handing off a packet of fruit snacks to him. Dylan accepted them with glee, but I knew how his father was. Nothing processed would be hidden in that man’s cupboards.

Dylan quickly opened the bag before popping his first piece into his mouth. “ Jesus , processed sugar brings pure happiness to my heart. I could kiss-“ but he cut those words off short, reminding me of why we were here in the first place. I inhaled deeply, working to build my confidence between I got into it.

“A-About that-”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to say-”

“It’s okay,” I assured him more gently. I could hear the immediate regret in his tone. “Really, please don’t apologize. I honestly owe you one.”

“I just…” Dylan started, slowing the devouring of the fruit snacks as I gently set the fork back in the glass container. “How can I fix it? I want to fix it. Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”

“You didn’t do anything, Dylan.” I rushed out quickly, feeling even more like shit by how badly I fucked up. “I was the one that… that read it wrong. I hadn’t meant to… kiss you. It was unexpected for me, and that’s why I bolted.”

“It was just a peck on the lips, Isiah,” Dylan countered more quietly, and I knew he felt that way, but it wasn’t just a peck on the lips for me. It never fucking was for me, but I couldn’t tell him that. “It’s not like we made out or anything. I… I didn’t take offense to it, I was just surprised because… well we’ve been friends for so long, I didn’t think…”

I remembered what Carson had said about maybe leaving the whole love thing out for now, and so I answered with “it was just a little crush, but I’m over it now. I should never have acted on it, or done that to you.” It wasn’t the truth, but I knew it was what had to be said. I could hear it in Dylan’s tone that he just wanted to be what we were before all this shit.

“Then can we just go back to how things were?” He asked me, confirming it. And yes, that shit fucking hurt… badly. Like really badly. But I missed him so much this past year that I told myself I could do that, even though deep down I knew I still had all these feelings for him that couldn’t be reciprocated on his part.

It was the kindest way anyone could be rejected honestly. I had made it easy for him by saying I was over it, and yet he was still so gentle with his words, it hurt me not to nod, agreeing, and so I did.

And the smile Dylan gave me just broke me even more.

It was so genuine- so beautiful, that it just killed me.

“Cool,” I practically whispered. I was going to have to figure out a way to get over it, and quickly. “How about that paired project then? You want to do it with me?”

And Dylan’s smile only widened as he nodded quickly, before popping another fruit snack into his mouth. “You’re the only one I trust not to tank my grade in that class,” he told me honestly which made me smile. I stuck the fork into the pasta again and twirled for another bite before handing the bowl back to Dylan. We did a trade off for the remaining fruit snacks, yet I noticed he didn’t bat a single eyelash using the same fork that I did, and I told my mind to just shut the fuck up.

We’d done this before. It was fine. It was what friends did.

I wanted him to tell me all about Ireland. All about visiting more of Don’s family, and just how the trip was in general. He had gotten more fit which means he must’ve been working out or something there. And his hair was perfect this length, I wanted to know if he was going to continue to grow it out, which I really wanted him to.

I wanted to know everything about him and what I had missed out on. If he had had his first drink since we were both 18 now, and it was legal over there. Had he learned new dishes with Don and Carson while staying there? And what were his plans now for college, considering I still hadn’t figured any of that shit out myself.

It was all questions that I couldn’t ask during a thirty minute lunch, but with this science project, I was hoping we’d have more time to catch up too. I at least felt good knowing that Carson and probably Don now knew the real reason I hurt their son like that, and Carson was just a friend on that phone call who was making sure I was good. He was for sure the easiest to talk to, and while I loved Don, I know he’d come with some much harsher truths while right now, I just wanted someone who would listen.

Ryker was going to pick me up, but after Dylan and I were forced to return to the building for our last two periods, luckily one of which was with Dylan- AP World History- I ended up texting the man asking if he could just drive me home, to which he agreed.

I wanted to keep up on my homework and check over my notes, because I still wanted to be that guy that Dylan would never think would tank his grade.

And while we had some time to work on this project, I wanted to get a head start on reading over the parameters and brain storming something good.

I was not going to be the reason Dylan didn’t get a perfect score.

We always did when we worked together on projects.

••

7. A Whittaker, A Dwyer, A Holland, And A Jacobs

Dylan

“Today seems like it was a good day,” my dad immediately noted as soon as I got into Carson’s car. Honestly fuck it, at this point it was the family car that technically only he could drive since it was a stick.

“Isiah and I spoke!” I rushed out quickly, climbing into the SUV. “We had lunch at the bleachers again. Like we used to.”

“Well that’s great, I’m glad your dad packed you a lot this week then,” Carson chuckled, pulling us out of the school’s parking lot. “I take it it went well?”

“Yes, it was fantastic! We… Well, we got over the disagreement we had and now we’re cool. We’ll be working on a science project together since we’re both in the same AP Chem class, so we’ll be spending more time together again.”

“Okay…” my dad nodded, “so you and him are… friends again?”

My eyebrows furrowed slightly but I nodded at him through the rearview mirror. “Yeah it was- it was just something minor. He and I are over it.”

Carson and my dad looked at each other a moment before Carson added “that’s… that’s good to hear, kiddo. Don and I still have to head back to work so maybe you can take some time this afternoon to brainstorm on the project. We’ll be pretty tired once we’re done tonight so why don’t you just prep something light for us all to finish cooking when we’re back. We’ll let you choose.”

“Awesome! Sounds like a plan. Can I… potentially also help myself to a bottle of beer?”

“We’re no longer in Ireland, tiny hu-… well I guess I can’t refer to you as that anymore. Anyways, the Ireland drinking days must be put behind you.” My father said seriously.

“I think we can make an exception just for tonight,” Carson insisted, turning to Don a moment. “Besides, the kid’s grown so much one beer will do nothing. Consider it a little celebration for getting back to the old ways with Isiah.”

“I gave that kid my fucking car, Carson. How much celebrating do you think we’re doing here?” My father snapped back, but Carson just gave him a look before focusing back on the road. I could hear my father grumble some profanities before saying “ fine . Not before homework, though. Get that done first.“

“Aye aye, cap’n! You have my word, thank you!”

“And don’t forget to prepare for driving yourself tomorrow. Get a good night’s sleep, you have enough lunches for tomorrow and Friday. Extra portions if you and Isiah are doing bleacher lunches again from now on.” Pops added, to which I nodded at his piercing gaze through the rearview, silently giving him my word that it’ll be an early night. I had a tendency to do some late night reading while in Ireland but he was trying to nip that in the bud now that we were back to regular programmed scheduling.

Pops and Carson dropped me off at the front of The Alpines before taking their leave, which meant I finally got to see Danise again as I entered.

“The prophet has returned from the Holy Land! Good lord did you get tall! How was your trip, kiddo?” She asked, setting out a plate of snickerdoodles on the counter immediately for me to take one, which I happily obliged.

“It was incredible!” I gushed to the sweet woman. “We spent time with a lot of Dad’s relatives and did a countryside tour. I also had my first beer there, which was a highlight for sure.” That got the older woman laughing with a swiftness.

“Now which kind of car are we registering for the underground lot? I haven’t forgotten the promise Mr. Whittaker-Jones, the scary one, made to you, you know.”

I couldn’t help but smile, before I set the cookie in my mouth, took off my back pack, and pulled out the keys Dad gave me. When Danise got sight of them, her eyes grew wide.

“Either you made it into Princeton, or you helped that old man hide a body. Which was it? I promise, your secret’s safe with me, little one- shoot, now I can’t really call you that anymore, can I?”

That got me immediately laughing, because honestly, it was a fair question, and it sounded like a lot of people were running into that predicament. Considering my father had about twenty variations of calling me small while I was growing up, I took no offense, but it was nice having this height now. Danise also knew how my dad was. “Neither, I think he just hates the long hours now that we’re back. That and Carson literally jumps at the opportunity to drive that man everywhere. The car has just been sitting down there.”

Danise nodded. “Yeah you’re not wrong. I guess they really do go everywhere together now these last few years. Well I am so happy you’ll get to drive yourself in for school! The kids will indeed lose their shit when they see that make and model. How has the first few days back been?”

That took me a minute to answer cause lord knows it’s been whiplash at best. “Interesting,” was what I settled on. “I got one of the worst teachers at the school but Isiah is in that class with me so I’m feeling pretty confident it won’t be all bad.”

“That’s awesome! I’m excited to see more of him. I can’t believe it’s been a whole year either. Did he change much?”

“Uh…” I trailed off a moment as I recalled Isiah’s new look. The cut hair, the leather jacket, and the tattoos… “Yeah, I guess you’ll see for yourself. We’re starting a science project together soon so we’ll be hanging out more.”

“I love that!” Danise gushed, while I continued munching on this cookie. “Well I shall leave you to it, I know you’re probably back to that regular tight schedule. Just make sure you stop by more, a year is too long to go without your handsome face dear lad.”

“I promise!,” I nodded, “And thanks for the snickerdoodle!”

That was how we left things as I picked up my backpack and made my way to elevator one to use my dad’s fob for access.

And good ol’ Danise was right, once I got to the penthouse floor and let myself into the home, I was already brainstorming what I should tackle first. The request for tonight was something light, so I was thinking perhaps going Greek. While I learnt how to make a shit ton in Ireland, most of the dishes were hearty and filling. A Greek salad sounded light, and I know my dad surely had all the damn vegetables in the fridge for it.

I thought about how Isiah had shared his fruit snacks with me at lunch. I had always traded off our cooking for a bit of something unhealthy he’d bring, but that was our secret. If it was up to my old man I would be eating a salad daily, so I liked spending as much time at Isiah’s as he did my place.

The very first thing I did once setting my school stuff down and kicking off my shoes, however, was crack open that promised beer. I know Dad had said homework first, but I finished almost all of it during my last period, so I thought I’d treat myself now while I chopped a bunch of veggies up. All I really had was brainstorming for that science fair. It was my phone ringing on the counter that surprised me right before I washed my hands, and who was calling made all that warmth of today come back, spreading through me.

“Hi,” I smiled immediately as I answered the call.

“Hey,” a familiar voice returned. “What’s up?”

I wasn’t sure if Isiah was home, but it sounded like it. I swear I heard his mother in the background before he moved to a quieter place.

“Just meal prepping for dinner tonight. My dads are working late so they dropped me off and returned to the office.” I explained.

“What’s on the menu, Head Chef?” He asked, just making my smile grow.

“Greek salad. They asked for something light and, well you know, you can toss a rock in this home and hit something healthy so I thought why not.”

That mad Isiah chuckle. His voice had gotten a bit rougher, more raspier during that one year, and it might have been from the slight cigarette smoke I smelt on him mixing with his cologne, but I didn’t mind it. I wasn’t a fan of the smoking part, but the mixed scent was growing on me. The voice was growing on me.

A lot of the changes he made sort of were, especially knowing that he himself hadn’t changed at his core.

“Well you’re in luck, my good man. I was just seeing if you had any preference for an unhealthy side tomorrow. I… I’d um… I’d like to start doing our bleachers lunches again if you would-”

“Yes!” I said a little too fucking enthusiastically, before I told myself to dial it down. Isiah simply chuckled again.

“Sounds like a plan. You can even throw in a side of that Greek salad of yours if you feel so inclined. I’d like to try it.”

“That’s going to cost you at least a candy bar, sir. Perhaps two. You’re now entering negotiations.” I chuckled lightly, hearing Isiah’s own laughter over the phone.

“I should have known to never enter negotiations with a Whittaker.” He told me with a smile I could hear through his words, which kept a smile on my face.

“Well technically I’m still a Holland.” I reminded him.

“You’ll keep it, won’t you.” He said. I nodded like he was here with me in this kitchen.

“Yeah. My Dad’s Dad is a fucktard but my Dad still carries his name because he made a name for himself. When we were in Ireland, we were Dwyers, which I really honestly liked, but here I’m going to stick with my mother’s name. She’s been working hard to pull herself out of that hole she was in and I’d like to honor it. See what accolades of my own I can add to it, like my father did with his.”

“ You never cease to amaze me ,“ Isiah said a bit more quietly in a tone which made me stall as I moved the phone to my ear so I could wash my hands. “I think that’s a great idea. Whatever you do- choose to do, will make her proud. I’m sure of it.”

This smile hadn’t left my face since we started this call, but that one hit a soft spot in me. A spot that it felt like he only knew how to locate besides my Dads. “You’re doing something great with the Jacobs name yourself. I’d like to see it in newspapers and textbooks one day.”

“Only if you’ll read them,” He jokingly replied.

Yet my response was rather serious when I said “I’ll read every last one. I don’t collect newspaper clippings but I’ll start if you’re in them.”

There was a slight pause before Isiah replied with “I’m going to finish this year strong. I promise you that I will. And I promise you won’t need to clip the newspapers, you’ll be in those very rooms hearing my testimonies in person.”

My cheeks were starting to hurt from smiling so goddamn hard, so much so I found myself sort of mindlessly saying “ I missed you . For that year… I really missed you .“

“…I know,” he told me rather seriously, forcing more warmth through me. “And I’m going to make up for that lost time with you. Starting with us bringing this science project home. I’m winning you gold.”

“Oh yeah?” I returned. “I believe it’s a grading scale we’re working with on this one. No medals or trophies.”

“Nah fuck that,” he replied seamlessly, “I’ll cast you something in my welding class if we take the highest score in the class.”

“You’re taking welding this year?” I asked , curious. I still didn’t know his full schedule.

“That I am,” he replied, “thought that I should pursue as much as I can. Have things to fall back on if I need to go to a trade school-”

“Isiah Jacobs,” I spoke as I finished a swig of beer, “You are the smartest person I think in our whole fucking school. Come time for applications, I think it’ll be a bloodbath amongst Ivy Leagues, Game of Thrones style.” That made the man chuckle.

“And yet, I am still managing to learn a thing or two from you. How does that work?” He asked me, pulling from me the widest fucking grin.

“All my teachings are really just my Dad’s. He likes to lecture, you know.” I laughed with Isiah on that one, because he did.

“Nah,” he disagreed however. “You were barely with the man when you approached me in the fifth grade, looked me dead in my fucking eyes, and said, “you’re the kid who did that paper on Stargate: Atlantis. You and I are cut from the same cloth, my friend. Best friend if you preferred the darker elements.” And thus, an alliance was formed. You were the only one who could understand why I chose it over SG-1.“

That one made me full on laugh. I remembered it completely. “And you were the only kid for a while my Dad actually trusted with me. I think he saw himself in you when it came to your ambition.”

“I think so too. For a man who lives in a fancy high rise, I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who’s absolutely never forgotten their roots. Besides you, of course.” That bit made my heart do a thing. “Let’s go sleigh riding again, and visit Wilmoria’s this winter. That was one of the best winters of my life.”

“Yeah,” I nodded quickly, “I would really really like that. “I’d have to ask Carson if it’s okay, but a few days down in Texas with you would be awesome, too. I want to show you how good I’ve gotten with riding.”

“I’d love that,” Isiah answered immediately. “I’d… I’d love to see you ride it… A horse. Ride a horse.” Isiah clarified even more quickly, his throat clearing a moment later, which brought a whole lot of heat to my fucking face at that.

So much heat, I almost dropped this bottle of beer I was still holding.

••

8. Rekindling

Isiah

“ I’d… I’d love to see you ride it… A horse. Ride a horse… “

Now just what the complete hell was I thinking saying some shit like that…

“I…” Dylan started. Goddamn it Isiah, get your fucking shit together . “Yeah- yes- right… yes…” Fuck . “I’ll let you know what Carson says. There’s plenty of room down there… but we usually go for Thanksgiving, and I’m sure you have some family plans right?” His deeper voice was a questionable mess that almost damn near made me pull my withering self into fetal position on my bed.

Shit.

“Yeah. I’m sure my mum has something planned.” I replied, almost ready to strangle myself for saying something so unbelievably stupid.

“We usually go for a week. Maybe you could come for a few days before?”

I smiled like a complete idiot at that. “That sounds great,” I told him, trying to mask my happiness at the fact that we could just bulldoze right past that last bit of utter embarrassment on my part.

“But I would love to have you see the Tourney that happens the day after Thanksgiving.” Dylan added. “You cannot tell a single fucking soul yet because even thinking it will awaken my father from the depths of fucking Mordor… but I… I wanted to ask my dad if I could compete this year.”

That had me sit up in my bed completely. “Really?” I asked him. If he was competing this year, my mum would just have to understand. We could always do our Thanksgiving shit early anyway.

“Yeah,” Dylan confirmed. “I’m getting real good at barrel racing. Em’s been showing me the ropes since her and Carson no longer compete.”

And that shit just made this almost permanent smile on my face, widen. “Em still holds that record, right?”

“No one’s come close to touching it,” Dylan replied, and I couldn’t help but chuckle. Of course they haven’t. “Em says only a Jones gets that record breaking title… but she’s willing to give it up for the son of a Whittaker-Jones.”

That just brought this smile to new heights. “Your secret’s safe with me.” I assured him.

“They’ve always been,” he replied, not wasting a second. “But seriously, don’t even think the thoughts around my father until I muster up the courage. And I won’t be breaking any records just yet, but Em told me of the time Carson got piss drunk and fell off his horse when he was around my age during one of his first Tourney’s so I’m working out some kind of angle with my dads as we speak.”

“You’ve got the right idea,” I confirmed. “Don’s always respected it when he went low and you took it to hell.”

Dylan fully laughed at that, causing me to push myself up against the headboard of my bed.

“I’m thinking us having some scientific breakthrough with this science project might help win him over, but then he might spew some bullshit nonsense about protecting the skulls of young scientific prodigies.” This handsome man sighed, knowing full well Don would take that angle.

I’m surprised he even let Dylan on a horse to begin with with how protective he was of his son.

“Well I plan on taking this evening to come up with something worthy,” I admitted to him.

“Great minds think alike,” he quipped. “After this salad, it’s off to the drawing board. And I’ve been thinking perhaps you and I need one. We waste too much paper with how big you write.” He teased. I found myself cracking up at that one.

“And you write too small.” I countered.

“I thought you said you loved my notes?” He shot back, making me laugh yet again.

“Yeah well Jacob’s the only one who could even come close to our precision with listening, but he writes in elvish. You win by default.”

Dylan fucking cackled at that, something I couldn’t help but join in with cause it was fucking true. I hadn’t known if I was looking at letters or Egyptian shapes this morning. “Just think about it,” I heard this man say once his laughter settled. “We can get one of those double sided ones on wheels. I’ll even let you flip it. You’ve always been a kinesthetic learner.”

Shit.

That was a pretty good bargain, I won’t lie.

“You really think the Donald Whittaker-Jones is really letting us anywhere near his plush white carpet with white board markers?” I questioned him.

“I mean… we’re eighteen now-… actually, nevermind, you’re so right. I forgot about the incident with the permanent marker on his wall five years ago. He’d close the door in our face as soon as we tried to wheel the thing in.”

Fuck it, that got another good laugh outta me. I had forgotten all about that incident when Dylan and I were thirteen. Don almost put us out on the street to have the residents of New York City babysit us instead once he caught sight of his pure white walls.

“I’d say we put it in my room but I’m not sure if you feel like bringing it up all those flights of stairs to the third floor. And I haven’t really had any square feet upgrades this last year either,” I told him, glancing around at how plain I had kept my room for the most part. My only real shining glory was the tv my dad helped me mount , and the shelf near the side of my bed which housed all my nerdy obsessions from since I was a kid.

It reminded me of how often Dylan and I would be cooped up in here on my bed, gaming or watching movies.

“You should-”

“-Come over sometime”

We had both said those words at the same time, making us both lightly chuckle.

“Yeah,” I nodded like he was still right here on my bed with me. “I mean, I assume we’ll probably have to go to each others place for the science project.”

“Yeah,” Dylan agreed. “I’m um… I’m having Molly over tomorrow… but would you like to come home with me from school Friday? We could start the project, then just… like hang out for a bit.”

“Yeah,” I found myself nodding again. “Yeah, I’d really like that. I’ll ask my mum if I can go. My stint with skipping school has her uptight.”

“Maybe you could stay for dinner, too?” Dylan offered. I could hear that slight excitement in his deeper voice, and at this point my cheeks hurt like fucking hell from how hard I was smiling.

But then that smile faltered just a little.

“Do you…” I started. “Do you think Don and Carson would be okay with my… well I don’t really look the same.”

I hadn’t even thought of that yet. They hadn’t seen the hair cut. Or the tattoos.

Yet Dylan’s next words banished all that creeping anxiety. “My dad might have an internal heart attack, but Carson won’t give a shit. You should see his mum Louise. She’s got sleeves and shaved sides.”

That had me grinning ear to fucking ear yet again. “Cool,” I nodded.

“ Very cool.“ Dylan confirmed. “Now I must admit, I just finished the celebratory beer my father and Carson granted me to have after I prepped this salad and finished homework. I think I should probably do that shit right now before they get home.”

My eyebrows furrowed curiously. “What are you celebrating?”

And there was a slight pause on his end. “Well, the fact that… well… that you and I are talking again.” His voice was awfully hesitant with that wholesome confession, but that shit sent warmth straight through the rest of me.

“Then you better get to it, tipsy Head Chef. And don’t fuck up the prepping now, I told you I want to try some tomorrow.”

Dylan chuckled lightly. “Yeah, yeah. Candy bars. Two . Don’t forget your end of the bargain. We’ve got a trade going my good man. You don’t want to be in debt to me.”

“Maybe not a Whittaker-Jones… but I don’t mind owning an IOU to a particular Holland.” I replied, hearing his perfect, light laughter on the other end before we finally said goodbye to each other, ending this call.

I stayed in my room for another few hours, working away, but once I smelt some food flood my small room, I quickly jumped out of bed to join my mum in the kitchen.

“Whatchya making?” I asked her, still not managing to shake this smile on my face from that damn phone call.

I had been a bit nervous to ring Dylan… but everything that we had spoke about left me feeling on cloud fucking nine. He was the only one I could speak to like that- so freely, and about any fucking thing. It was like an entirely different language than with any of my other friends, and the fact that he had invited me over on Friday had me praying these days between would fucking fly. Well that, and that this scary woman I call a mother would say yes.

My mum looked over at me from where she was standing at the stove of our small kitchen as I reached up to get two plates from the cupboard.

She didn’t say anything when I set them down on the dinner table, which finally made me turn to look at her. The silence was awfully deafening.

“What?” I asked.

She just continued to stare.

“ What? “ I pushed this woman. She was known to be a lot of things, but quiet surely wasn’t one of them. 

“What’s gotten into you?” She asked me, though the tone in her voice was different which made me chuckle nervously.

“What are you talking about?” I asked hesitantly. She had fully stopped stirring whatever was slowly simmering in that pot to just stare at me. She was in one of her comfy oversized shirts and casual cotton shorts, and I noticed a poured glass of wine on the counter. Maybe she was wine drunk or something?

Nah, I almost shook my head. I don’t think I’d ever seen my mum actually drunk before. She always kept it at one glass.

“Did something happen?” She asked, turning the stove off to turn to me as I rather hesitantly took a few steps back into the kitchen to lean against the counter.

“What do you mean?” I asked her, this time a bit more concerned. Did something happen? I mean, after her almost killing me for ditching school and coming home twisted, I thought her and I were cool now. Wekk, as cool as we could be given the year we’ve had. She’d even taken me to school this morning.

“Why… why are you smiling?”

I didn’t even know what to make of that question.

“Isiah,” her voice dropped a bit, still uneven. “I haven’t seen you smile in like a year. And we damn sure haven’t eaten together in that long either.”

I found myself diverting my gaze from her quickly as heat rushed to my damn cheeks. There’s no way that could’ve been true . I’ve… I have… I mean I must have…

“Um…” I started, refusing to look her way now. “Dylan and I… we sort of… well, we sort of made up today.”

Had it really been that long since I…

“You… you did?” She asked me, yet it was that tone that forced me to look at her again. She was rarely ever this… off.

“Yeah, we um… we sorted out our bullshit or whatever. He and I are cool now. I just got off the phone with him not too long ag-”

I didn’t even finish my damn sentence before the shorter woman rushed me, pulling me into the hardest fucking hug that frankly almost knocked me back into the chairs behind me, set around the dining table.

“M-Mum, I-It’s no big de-”

“ Shut the fuck up ,“ she snapped against me, hugging me even harder. “Just… just shut the fuck up for a second.”

And I just stood there like a pole for a moment, not sure what she was doing… however my arms soon found themselves wrapping around the strong woman. Then we stood like this in silence, because honestly I was too scared to say anything else.

When she eventually pulled away to get a good look at me, I decided I’d just let her say something first. “Listen to me and listen to me carefully Isiah Ivon Jacobs, I don’t know what the fuck happened between you two, but I don’t want you to ever let it happen again. You got that?”

I knew she wanted words from me, but all I could do was nod.

Hell, it was all I could do. I had already promised myself I wouldn’t do some shit like that to Dylan again- I would never hurt him like that again, but the look from my mother put the fear of god in me.

“Good,” she nodded, before taking the slowest steps back to the stove, still eyeing the living hell out of me. “Now when’s he coming over?”

And I couldn’t help the smile that crept upon my face at her words.

“He invited me over on Friday. We’re… well, we’re working on a science project together. And I was thinking maybe he could come over next Friday… or somethi-”

“Yes.” She nodded more to herself than really me as she turned the stove on again. “Yes. Tell him I’ll make his favourite meatloaf, extra sauce. Just how he likes it. With all the creamy mash on the side to his hearts content.”

“I…” I was still a bit too stunned, even with this grin on my face, but I forced some words from me. “Yeah… okay, yeah. I’ll let him know.”

“Good,” she said yet again. “And I don’t know what the fuck Carson said to you on that call last night, but thank him for me in person on Friday.”

“I… I can go?” I asked her. Honestly, I thought I was fucking grounded with the shit I pulled last night but apparently not.

“Damn right you can fucking go,” she snapped, returning her hand to the wooden spoon in the pot. “And I’m making ravioli so sit your ass down at the table. It’s almost done.”

••

9. Partner Up

Dylan

“Why the fuck are you up so early?” My father asked me as soon as I stepped into the kitchen. He and Carson were already dressed for work, pouring their cups of coffee before they took off for the day. “I grant you your freedom to drive yourself and you insult me by getting yourself up for once? And at the ass crack of dawn no less?”

I gave him a rather nervous smile as I ran my hands through my messy bed hair. It wasn’t even six in the morning yet.

“I um… well, I know you both were very tired last night so I didn’t want to ask then, but uh… do you guys mind if I drive Molly here after school with me today? Technically I have enough to get her an Uber home so I won’t have to take the car out that way, and technically I’m just coming from school to home like you sai-”

“Yeah yeah, whatever,” Don mumbled, returning that cup of coffee to his lips. “I don’t give a shit right now. You struck me at an opportune moment.”

I was going to feign a look of surprise, but honestly this was a calculated move on my part. and the way these two looked dead to the world this morning beat out the horrendously irritated mood my father was in the night before. These long work days were not fairing well with my old man.

“Carson and I won’t be back till late-… wait, so you will be alone here with Molly? Are you trying to take advantage of me for your own-” my father started.

Carson brought his own cup to his lips as he cut in with an equally tired tone, mumbling “pretty sure she’s a lesbian. He’s fine.”

That made my father turn to him slowly. “Seriously?”

Carson nodded. “I’ve been surrounded by lesbians my whole life, love. That and she asked far too many questions about my mums last time she was here. Dylan’s fine.”

My dad looked at Carson for maybe one whole second before he muttered “fuck it.”

… okay… so I didn’t even really know that about Molly, but I wasn’t about to question these two now. Not when I was already on a bit of a roll. “I um… so I also invited Isiah here tomorrow after school to work on our project, and have dinner with us.”

And that had both these men choking on the sip of coffee they just took.

Perhaps I… wasn’t on a roll? I thought to myself.

“H-Here?” Dad asked me. “Like on Friday? We… we won’t be home till like eight or some shit. That’s… that’s like five hours where you two will-”

“I know!” I rushed out, feeling myself losing my father. “He and I can cook dinner together so you guys won’t have to, I swear! I have been trained under the best, and while I know you two weren’t planning on having to make a meal and stuff, I will absolutely handle it all. You won’t have to lift a finger.”

My father went completely silent a moment, turning to Carson. Then they stared at each other another moment with those tired eyes as their coffee cups were held just inches from their lips.

Perhaps offering dinner to Isiah really was overkill on my part, but after he-… well he really liked the lunch at the bleachers yesterday, and I just sorta said it, not thinking.

“So…” Carson finally broke the silence. “He’s coming… to work on… the project.”

“Yes,” I nodded immediately. “I promise you, we will not even think of touching the remote, you have my sworn word.”

And yet the silence between these two was deafening.

“I… I expect a progress report upon my return.” Dad finally settled on. “And my kitchen not on fire or so help me god-”

“Yes sir, and I promise it won’t be!” Jesus , I was putting my whole soul into these requests this morning, and I could barely keep my eyes open. It took everything in me to catch these two before they left. I knew they didn’t trust Isiah and I to just do our homework, especially because we had just become friends again, but I was willing to do whatever I could to convince them we weren’t just going to fuck off and play video games while they were away.

It took my father yet another good long minute before he gave me one singular nod… and I was finally able to release the breath I was holding in.

“Thank you,” I told them both gingerly.

“Now leave,” my dad snapped. “Since you’re up and all, go take a shower and pick up your room before school this morning. And if I find out it was sleep depravity that was responsible for any potential accidents you may get into with my car on your way to school or on your way home, I will find the biggest fucking pit on this dying rock and throw your giant self into it. Are we clear?”

“Yes sir!” I nodded, expecting literally nothing less as I all but bolted the hell out of there.

I wasn’t about to test my luck with such a testy man.

Regardless of what my father believed to be true, I did not crash his car on the way to school.

I actually made it just fine, and stopped by the lower entrance to register it with the admin office there before quickly making my way up towards my lockers where I knew Molly was waiting on me. The vibrant young gal had sent me about seven texts telling me just that, and to hurry the hell up.

“Are we on for this afternoon?” She asked excitedly, pulling me in for a tight hug once I was within her reach, to which I nodded with a smile her way and started to unlock my locker once she released me from her short arms yet unnaturally tight embrace. “I’m excited!” She exclaimed, but I just laughed.

“All we’re doing is going to my home. You’ve been there before, Molly.”

“Well yes, but not in a luxury vehicle!”

“Yeah yeah,” I chuckled as I got my school shit together, allowing this sweet young gal to continue to gush all the way from the lockers once we left them, right to my first period.

I had to insist she make it to her own class so she wasn’t late.. but the truth was, as soon as my eyes found the most familiar pair of hazel-green ones, I couldn’t take long strides to slide into that desk beside him fast enough, his eyes following mine with a smile on his lips. A smile that matched my own.

“Hi.”

“Hey.” Isiah’s smile widened.

“So I got the all clear for you to come over tomorrow, but it came with a few… adjustments .” I explained, forcing me to break the gaze we held just a moment, to grab my note pads from my backpack and place them on my desk. Then I turned back to him.

“Launch em at me, Mr. Holland.” He insisted with that unwavering smile, causing me to smile harder.

“My Pops and Carson won’t be back from the office till around eight.” I explained. “So dinner is… well it’s sort of in our hands to make for everyone now.”

“That sounds good to me.” Isiah nodded quickly.

“And I… well when I offered dinner, I know you probably didn’t plan-”

“I’ll make dinner with you, Dylan.” Isiah cut in. “Now… did you have anything devastating for me or just a new fun activity to add to our debauchery?”

My gaze slowly lowered a bit as I felt my face unexpectedly heat up just a bit with my growing smile. “I… I think that just about does it.”

“Perfect. What are we making?” He asked, forcing my gaze to his again.

Shit.

What were we making? Dad and Carson were so fucking over it this morning. I didn’t think they even bothered to request something.

“Any requests?” I asked instead.

“Well it can’t be my mums infamous meatloaf with extra sauce and creamy mash because she already making that for you next Friday.” Isiah replied.

“Next Friday?” I asked all too fucking excitedly, to which Isiah nodded.

“I told her that we’re good now and she got all emotional so you’ll have to make it over or she’ll die or something I dunno.”

“Oh I’ll fucking be there ,” I told him with all seriousness. “You tell her to just set that extra place at the table. And… and how crea-”

“ Extra creamy,“ Isiah answered, clearly loving all the emotions I was going through at the current moment, which were many. As many as the wars that had been wagered for even a bite of his mother’s meatloaf and creamy mash- something good ol’ Pops would deem far too unhealthy for us to ever attempt at home.

“You tell Mrs. Jacobs that I hope Mr. Jacobs can fight because I’m willing to go until death for her hand.” I told him with equal seriousness, damn near crying tears of happiness as I leant back in my chair just dreaming about that fucking meatloaf.

“Ew, absolutely not. That’s my mother. I refuse to have you as a stepdad.” Isiah immediately shook his head as we both slightly chuckled.

“Then adoption?” I insisted, yet the movement from Zinfel was what forced both Isiah and my own gaze forward almost instinctively.

“You’re eighteen,” he more or less whispered, causing me to muffle my next chuckle.

“Then I’ll just marry in-” I started whispering back but stopped myself before I could get any further, feeling a deep wave of heat rising to my cheeks. The only eligible suitor was-

“Alright, let’s begin.” Zinfel spoke to the filled class, yet that didn’t stop Isiah from whispering back something under his breath that made me stifle a laugh, forcing my eyes down to my notes on my desk momentarily.

“I’d prefer a diamond over a band since you’re asking and all.”

“So,” Zinfel continued, perhaps about thirty minutes into this class already, “what I am about to hand out is a series of probability questions. You will spend the rest of this class working through them. If you would like to choose one peer to work with, so be it, yet I expect your voices low and you will be graded as a unit if you choose to. So choose carefully.”

I glanced over at Isiah almost immediately, but he was already looking my way with his hazel-green eyes. And we smiled almost instantly as the packets started being handed back by rows. There was no one else in this damn school that I’d put my grade in the hands of, especially when it came to Zinfel’s harsh grading tactics.

“Let’s switch desks.” He whispered over to me, which at first my eyebrows creased in a bit of confusion… before my smile widened, and I quickly nodded, slipping from my desk while he did the same. We didn’t even bother to pick up our backpacks, we only grabbed our notes before sliding into each others respective seat, him on my left side while I was now on his right.

Then we shifted our desks together, accepting the packets handed back to us before taking two and passing the rest back.

The smile on my face never fucking left. It felt like Isiah and I hadn’t don’t this in ages , with us both keeping our packets right next to each other, and our notes on the other sides of our desk. We quickly wrote both our names on each one.

“Alright,” Isiah whispered, right next to me now. I could smell his cologne fully, yet I noticed there wasn’t as much of a cigarette scent clinging to the leather jacket that was hanging onto the back of the chair I was now in. “Let’s get this fuckery started.”

And I gave him a quick nod in response.

“So as you know, I’ve been brainstorming for the project- oh, don’t forget this variable,” Isiah spoke quietly, easily moving his right hand from his packet to my own to fix the problem we were both working on. “It’ll create a variance in the controlled test group.”

I gave him the largest smile, watching him write half the problem with his right hand while I finished it off with my left.

Sitting like this was how he and I always used to work, allowing us easy access to each others work, as well as our notes. We used to lay like this on our beds too as kids when we read, so he and I could easily mark up the pages of our favourite books with underlining and highlighting.

“Then this,” I added quietly, reaching over to his paperwork to write in my own notes on the same problem, “would be only partially correct.”

“Ah shit. You’re right.” He whispered back with a smile of his own, erasing a few of his written explanation before penciling in the right findings. And when he looked over at me, those eyes of his catching mine with that smile, I felt more warmth spread through me, forcing me to turn to my own packet.

Shit. I really had missed this.

Him .

“Okay so I was thinking you and I could really Reed Richards the fuck out of this project.” Isiah whispered. “Like unstable molecules this shit. But we’ll probably need a list of items not available to us in labs.”

A quietly cackled at that. “Reed Richards, huh?”

“Hey, I was watching Fantastic Four when I was working yesterday. The good one, not Fan4stic- oh, this is an outlier,” Isiah reached over again to circle one of the groups as we moved to the next problem.

“Right, one sec,” I looked over my own notes a moment before scribbling in a formula. “Also of course, I thought you and I agreed we’d never acknowledge that movie.”

“Shit, your right,” Isiah chuckled himself. “Anyways so it made me pull back out some of the comics-”

“I thought you said you were doing real research yesterday,” I teased, turning my head to him. We… were so close to each other, our whispers felt like a casual, full volume conversation.

“I was ,” he insisted, bumping his right shoulder with mine gently, pulling from me yet more light, quiet laughter.

“Reed Richards is not research,” I continued, unable to stop myself from bumping him back.

“Now says the fuck who?” He whispered back with a killer smile.

I didn’t even have time to answer that, because a different voice interrupted us.

It was Jacob, who was sitting in front of us. He had turned his head around to face Isiah and I. “Will you two stop it? “

Isiah cut a sharp gaze over to him quickly. “Stop what?” He asked, though I noticed his tone had completely changed from the more playful tone he literally just carried with me.

“Having… fun ,” Jacob snapped. “Look around you. Look at all the pain and fucking suffering of your peers.”

That made both Isiah and I finally glance around the classroom for the first time since we pushed our desks together. A few people had partnered up, pushing their desks a bit closer together as well… but I hadn’t noticed just how… well how miserable everyone looked.

Sarah, another girl I noticed from my previous years, had taken off her glasses and placed them on her desk as she ran her hands through what was once short curls but was now a birds nest sitting above her head.

Jared, another guy I think I remembered from freshman year, was leant back in his chair, just staring up at the shitty fluorescent lights and ceiling tiles in what could only be described as pure despair.

“ Feign some fucking misery, will you? “ Jacob continued quietly in that harsh tone. “I want to pull my fucking hair out with question three and you two are over here on the second page he-he and ha-ha-ing like this is a second grade spelling test. Cut it the fuck out.”

“Well,” Isiah offered before I could say a damn thing. “It’s not our fault your note taking skills are complete shit.”

And I genuinely had to stifle that laugh because Jacob looked like he was about to fully turn around and climb over his chair to get at us.

“Richards,” Zinfel’s voice bellowed over the class from his place at his desk in the front of the room. “I believe I said partner , not group . Turn around and focus on your own work.”

“Yeah, Richards ,” Isiah added, doing a little twirl motion iin the air with the pencil in his right hand, to which Jacob gave us a deathly glare before doing as Zinfel asked.

I turned to Isiah again, wanting to tell him not to patronize the poor, stressed man, but the fucking grin on my face contradicted whatever my lips could fix themselves to say. And when Isiah turned his head towards me, just inches away, the smile stretching further across his own lips just forced that warmth further through me.

“Now as I was saying ,” he continued quietly, making me chuckle even fucking harder, adoring his complete lack of fucks given. We had, after all, continued working through this awfully unserious  conversation…

And I… I liked seeing him get like this, I decided, listening in intently to his outrageous science project pitch.

••

10. A Deal’s A Deal

How y’all liking this one so far? :) new chap of TSOE is going up tonight but I know some folks were dying for an update on this one so I’m here to deliver

Also- I got a new job! Better pay for less work and just completed week 1. Thank you sm for all the well wishes

Anyhooo, enough of my rambling, enjoy lovelies!

xoxo

Isiah

Fuck, I knew I was playing it so goddamn dangerously right now.

Knowing that every smile and laugh I could pull from Dylan was just pulling me further in…

But I couldn’t stop it.

I liked him like this. I loved him like this. This happy .

We had been the first to finish our assessment for Zinfel’s class, which left us with about ten minutes left of class to continue or brain storming, with Dylan returning to my desk after he handed in his packet, and I returned to his.

Sitting like this meant we were practically shoulder to shoulder, and we used to work like this all the time… but now things were… different. At least for me.

I couldn’t keep my fucking eyes off of him. Not from the second his found mine at the door to Zinfel’s class first period, his long strides quickly making their way to me with a grin on his face.

A grin I’m sure I mirrored with ease.

It was everything from the damn loose fitted black turtleneck and grey slacks he was wearing, to the defined curls in his long hair that looked perfectly soft to the touch, to his goddamn scent that surrounded me from the moment he sat beside me, only to practically engulf me when we traded seats.

And he had made that comment about marrying in. I thought he’d close up about it- that maybe I went too far with the whole diamond thing- but I caught that smile as his gaze remained on that desk and just-

Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

I was happy he had accepted the invitation to come over next Friday.

Hell, I had to tell myself to calm the actual fuck down when he mentioned his dads would be working late tomorrow night. That he and I would tackle all of dinner together.

I mean… Dylan and I had cooked together all the time, but that was with Don or Don and Carson. Tomorrow, it… it would be just us. Alone. Not- not saying that anything would happen or anything, but my work to get over this fucking man was unraveling with each passing moment we spent together, and I didn’t quite know what to do anymore.

Every time his light eyes met mine, I fucking folded on every mantra rushing through my head, screaming at me that this couldn’t happen- that it would never happen between us. Dylan had been clear that he just wanted friendship. The way things were before…

But the way things were before was how these feelings of mine began. Making him happy- seeing those large smiles of his- this was how all this fuckery started.

Once the bell rang to end first period, Dylan and I each passed each other our backpacks, packing up our notes before moving the desks back, but before we could move to fill out of the room like the rest of the students, Dylan stopped me.

“Oh, I meant to ask. What period is welding for you?”

I just gave him a smile. “I’ll text you my schedule.”

“Cool.” He grinned, allowing me to lead us out.

And after saying a quick goodbye and separating in opposite directions, I quickly typed out all 6 periods and sent it in a text to him. We were doing things so out of order. Discussing buying a whiteboard on wheels and he didn’t even have my full class schedule yet… but I liked the chaos.

It felt like we were just grabbing onto whatever the hell we could with each other, making up for all that time lost.

I forced myself to power through Welding and AP English before I finally made it to AP Chem, another class with Dylan. I was hoping- begging for some project work time, but apparently today was a movie day. On atomic structures and properties. So not really the most riveting stuff, and even more annoyingly, I was forced to sit beside Dylan and not talk to him at all.

That simple fact was what had me rapidly packing my shit as soon as that bell rang, releasing us for lunch.

“Fucking finally,” I swear I heard Dylan mutter as he did the same, which made me grin. Whether that was directed at that this class being over, or us finally getting our time on the bleachers, didn’t matter to me. I supported both at this rate.

“I’ll see you in a sec,” I spoke, leaning over to him with my jacket and backpack already slung over a shoulder, and Dylan quickly nodded, smiling my way as I got the hell out of this class and all but bulldozed my way through the filled halls to get to my lunch in my locker, then to outside.

Today was admittedly a bit chillier, which honestly reminded me of the fact that October would be here before I knew it. Then winter. And the bleacher lunches would cease for a few months because of the cold and snow.

I fucking hated every time that happened, because then it forced Dylan and I to the cafeteria, where we were surrounded by friends, yes, but that also meant that it wasn’t just him and I anymore.

I barely made it up here today before I saw Dylan climbing the steps himself, taking them two at a time with his now longer strides.

“Oh well someone’s eager,” I teased, having a seat as the man joined in seconds. We swung one leg over the bench to straddle the seat, placed our lunch bags in between us, and Dylan just stared me down as I unzipped my bag and dug into mine, chuckling at his intensity before I pulled out exactly what he was waiting for.

I held up his candy bar, to which I saw this man immediately frown.

“Isiahhh,” he practically whined. “I said tw-”

Once my thumb pushed out the second Hershey’s Cookies and Cream behind the first one, an immediate grin spread across his face as he reached for them, but I held them back behind me. “A deal is a d-”

Before I could finish that fucking sentence, I watched with incredible speed as this man stood, using the level from the bleacher seat in front of us and below as he leaned over the lunch bag and stretched his entire body towards me, easily reaching both of chocolate bars.

He had gotten so damn close to my face, and so damn quickly, I almost fell back onto the metal bench itself from the proximity.

The way he snatched them up left me absolutely stunned as he retracted his body and sat back down like that was nothing.

“Now,” Dylan continued, placing the chocolate safely behind him on the metal, before unzipping his own lunch bag. “I bestow upon thee a bunch of fucking vegetables.” He reached inside and pulled a medium shaped glass bowl with a silicone lid, then handed me a fork to go with it.

That was when I started to laugh, accepting the item he ushered towards me.

“You’re insane, you know that?” I teased him, pulling the lid off to look at the glorious salad Dylan had prepped to throw together with his dads last night. It reminded me of all of his and my own conversation.

“Do not dangle what it is a man desires most in the world and not expect a calculated attack.” He answered simply as he reached behind him for the first candy bar.

I knew I was smiling like an idiot once I stabbed that fork in the salad for my first bite. Him munching on his candy with a content smile of his own made me feel all the fucking things. I really liked making him happy.

That first bite however just about made me moan. “Oh my god,” I got out between chews. “Oh fuck this is good.”

“Saying that as I eat this delicious chocolate feels like a sin of some sort.” Dylan grumbled.

“Well lord forgive me for I have sinned because this bowl right here is pure fucking seduction.” I shot back, taking yet another bite then another. “Do you think tomorrow we could-”

“No fat chance in hell.” Dylan told me seriously between bites of chocolate. “I already had that for dinner yesterday. I’m not having it again.”

I chuckled at that. “Alright, fair. I’ll accept what I can get. Speaking of which, I’ll trade you a capri sun for that green apple-”

“Deal,” Dylan nodded quickly, placing the remaining bit of his candy bar to hold between is lips as he reached in for the apple with one hand while holding his hand out expectantly. Fuck , that made me cackle even harder as I freed up a hand to grab the juice pouch from my bag and place it in his hand, then he stretch his other with a bright apple in it which I gladly took.

“Fair trade, sir. Just imaging me wearing a top hat and tipping it to you.” Dylan spoke before finishing off his chocolate.

Jesus, fuck , this man was going to end me today.

I watched him stab into the juice pouch before bringing the straw to his lips and nodding repeatedly. “ I don’t care how downright fucking gorgeous your body looks now, please don’t stop bringing me processed sugar.“

That made me freeze up mid bite of my salad. I just stared at Dylan a moment as he continued on in his own world, annihilating that juice pouch.

“Gorgeous?” I asked him, causing Dylan’s throat to suddenly reject those last few sips as he started to choke on them.

Had he… had he just-

After a few good solid chest hits, Dylan got his cough contained enough to say “I… I mean… I just meant that it’s like- that, you know it’s- it’s well built and-”

I tilted my head to look down towards this salad, hoping to mask some of this fucking massive grin spreading across my lips rapidly.

Dylan tried clearing his throat a few times before he changed the subject as a whole.

“So for tomorrow. We should draft up a list of anything we might need that’s not in the labs for us to test with. I’ll have my dad get it.”

I glanced back up at Dylan, forcing myself to chew this mouthful of salad before I asked him “now where the hell is Don getting that shi-” but then I stopped myself short. “…Actually, I don’t wanna know.”

Dylan only nodded, accepting that was probably the safest for all parties involved, before he pulled that second candy bar out from behind him and started to tear it open.

Even while this man literally inhaled the next bar, I sat with my green apple, enjoying the sourness of it that was Dylan’s favourite too, and I watched him eat his unhealthy lunch.

At some point, he gestured for me to go ahead with the pasta as well, but I just laughed and opened it up for the both of us. We had very little time left and I refused to have this tall ass man eat only sugar for lunch.

He was reluctant to me feeding him something other than sugar, however he agreed to open up when I stuck a fork wrapped in pasta out for him to take a bit of in between his chocolate. It felt like I was feeding a giant teddy bear but I didn’t give a single fuck, he needed something more substantial. I watched intently as he leaned forward, accepting the bite, before returning to his chocolate bar.

And I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t the sweetest most sexiest yet downright adorable act- him acting like a gremlin over sugar.

Having that salad as dinner last night must’ve really pissed him off.

Before Dylan and I could fully leave the bleachers together, I heard my name called from across the bleachers and into the field.

“Izzy!”

I glanced over, as did Dylan while we were walking back, to find none other than Ryker jogging across the field towards us.

••

11. Not My Place

Updating here, Substack, and Inkitt in a few hours, just caught a cold lol

xoxo

Dylan

“Oh my god!” Molly exclaimed, but I just rolled my eyes as I drove us. “So this is you? All you?”

“Yes,” I answered for the billionth time. “Well, until my dad decides to drive again.”

It was a possibility, sure, but I didn’t see him driving unless Carson had to go visit his mums on a whim. Otherwise, Carson was quite literally our chauffeur.

“I cannot believe he let you have it! No offense but your dad is both charming and absolutely terrifying all at the same time.” Molly noted. I simply shrugged, for I was more than used to that old man and his tendencies.

“He means well,” I assured her before turning us into the street that the Alpines was located on. I wondered what time my dads would actually be getting off tonight, but the only thing they requested while I was at school was that glasses of wine would be poured upon their arrival.

This meant that tonight was another toss up.

“Hey,” I asked Molly, turning my head her way for a fraction of a second before I looked towards the road again. “What… when did… when did Isiah start hanging around Ryker? Like when exactly?”

I sounded awkward. I knew I did, but I couldn’t fucking help myself. Isiah had dismissed himself on that field to go chat with Ryker, leaving me to head back inside on my own. And while this was by far the most stupid thing for me to get hung up on… I didn’t like Isiah hanging out with him.

He wasn’t good for him… though I knew I had literally no fucking place to speak my thoughts aloud. If Isiah wanted him as a friend, I knew I needed to accept it… but I couldn’t reject the emotions it left me with. I hated every bit of this.

“Maybe like a month after you left. I don’t think you should be too hard on Isiah for it though,” she spoke as I pulled the car around towards the underground parking. “He was struggling without you. Hard . Everyone could sense it, and he just needed someone. So if you’re gearing up to chastise him, keep that in mind.”

“I’m not,” I answered her quickly. “I… I won’t. I understand, it’s just… I’m back now, you know?”

Molly slowly shook her head no. “That doesn’t… erase things Dyl. I’m so fucking happy that you took this trip and got to know your family more, but for Isiah, it was honestly a harsher adjustment. And we didn’t even know how long you’d be gone for- none of us did. You called me almost every day but you and Isiah didn’t communicate at all, and yes that was fully on him, but I think he was just searching for anything that could resemble what you two had. Those are big fucking shoes to fill.”

I remained silent as I slowly drove this car into my dad’s assigned slot, before shutting the thing off.

I didn’t know how to handle this. How to deal with Isiah having a friend so destructive. I had said nothing today, yet I watched as the guy slung an arm around Isiah’s neck as they walked off the field together. He had called him Izzy, which was a nickname Isiah hated because it reminded him of his great aunt on his father’s side… yet he allowed that from Ryker of all people.

“Come on,” Molly insisted, picking up on the quiet. “Let’s head inside, then you can mope.”

And I nodded, following the kind girl’s wise words.

“Every time I come here, I forget how absolutely stunning the place is.” Molly mumbled to herself as I opened the front door of the penthouse fully for her to step through.

“Well you’ve only been here a handful of times,” I reminded her. Her parents first had to be looked into by my dad, and he didn’t quite care for the fact that both her parents were journalists, but they met for drinks, and my Pops soon came around. Whether he threatened them or not was still a mystery, but I knew for damn sure that not a single article was written about him.

And they were the most welcoming whenever I visited.

“Hey Molly,” I spoke, setting my backpack on the couch next to hers. She had already plopped down right on the plush carpet near the table, and was searching through Netflix for something to watch.

“Yes, my sweetums?” She answered with her eyes still fixated on the tv screen.

“Are you a lesbian?” I more or less blurted out. That got the young gal’s attention immediately.

“Pardon?” She asked as her head whipped in my direction. I knew this was her giving me a moment to rephrase but I didn’t really have that many options swimming around in my brain on how to reword it.

“My… my dad and Carson mentioned something about you maybe liking girls. I just… I thought I’d ask.”

“Oh,” she replied, nodding her head like her sexuality was a topic of discussion for everyone. “I think I might be. I keep moving the goal post when it comes to men, and I’m sick and tired of it.”

I simply nodded, understanding what it was she meant. “Well, I support whoever you love.” I told her, yet that got her cracking up.

“Dylan, judging by your parents, I knew that already. Let’s just keep this between us for now, okay? I’m still working out how to break the news to my parents.”

I gave her a quick, firm nod before leaving her in the living room to find something on Netflix while I entered the kitchen, deciding on what the hell I was cooking for dinner tonight.

Molly stayed for a solid four hours before I ordered her an uber. Carson and my dad were just getting home, and Carson offered to drive Molly back, but I refused his offer. From the looks of both him and my dad, they needed sleep pronto.

Instead, I plated them each some soup and bruschetta I had made for dinner, before heading towards my bedroom. It was the sound of my phone going off that made me scramble for it quickly somewhere on the mattress.

And once I found it, then saw who was calling, I answered immediately.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” Isiah replied. “Is now a bad time?”

“N-No, no no-” I rushed out as I sat up more in bed. “I’m just relaxing. About to start some homework.”

“Molly’s gone then?” He asked, to which I almost only nodded, forgetting I was on the phone.

“Yes. I… I didn’t expect you to call. I saw Ryker picked you up after school and thought…” my voice trailed off once I realized how fucking insane I sounded.

You have no right , I reminded myself. None at all.

“Why…” I still started, overstepping boundaries I knew should’ve been in place. “Why are you two so… close?”

Isiah took a second before replying. “We’ve got… a bit of a friends with benefits relationship going.”

That almost made me drop my fucking phone. “You- wait, you what?”

“You can’t tell anyone,” Isiah rushed out quickly, “but… yeah.

I couldn’t even stop myself from asking this follow up question. “When did this start?” To which Isiah paused yet again. I was trying so fucking hard to keep my voice sounding leveled but fuck, the strain could be heard from a mile away.

“Recently,” Isiah admitted. I remained quiet for a good, long while as I processed that. “Dylan?” Isiah called into the line after some time.

“Do you love him?” I blurted out just fully uncensored, making my body want to shrivel up and fucking die. Isiah started coughing immediately at my question.

“L-L-Love?” He then asked me. “No- no no no, this i-is more of like a casual thing- like we’re more friends- like it isn’t…”

“You’d…” I started, thinking of how to word this insanity. “You’d tell me, right? If it was… if it’s like… more?”

“Y-Yeah,” Isiah replied almost immediately. “Yeah, you’d… you’d be the very first to know. Especially now that we’re… but, I mean, you must have been crushing hard on some Irish women on your trip to worry bout lil old me.”

“Not… not really,” I spoke honestly as I sat up more in bed. In all 18 years of existing, I hadn’t really crushed hard on anyone . I was always more focused on school and stuff, that those type of feelings didn’t really develop for me.

“… oh,” Isiah replied far more quietly. “Well you must have someone in school in mind, right? I’m sure a year away had to of changed some things for the girls.”

I didn’t even know how to reply to that… besides slowly shaking my head as I all but whispered “no…”

This was new territory for Isiah and I. We had never asked each other about crushes, and up until now, I assumed he and I never had any.

That was when Isiah’s confession hit me like a ton of bricks.

He had been crushing on me , I reminded myself.

“Well…” Isiah’s words were a bit more hesitant now. Far more hesitant, really, and so much so that I worried I might’ve been the reason. “I’m sure whoever you set your eyes on will be one lucky lady.”

And I couldn’t for the fucking life of me decide what it was that had me saying this, but words were already falling past my lips before I could stop them. “What if… what if it’s not a lady.”

Isiah started coughing up a storm immediately. “S-Sorry- I’m eating some soup right now- b-but what… w-what do you mean?”

What did I mean? I thought quietly.

I knew I hadn’t really ever felt like that towards a girl… but what in the hell could’ve propelled me to even insinuate feelings like that towards a man?

“I…” I started, unsure of how to dig myself out of the hole I had landed myself in. “I just… I don’t really do crushes, so it might… well it might not be so far left field to think if I were to have one, it could be with a boy.”

“Have you… have you had a crush on a boy before?” Isiah asked me quietly. “Like-…. Like ever?”

“I… I don’t think so?” I offered quietly. Honestly, I think the only person I ever developed those kind of feelings for while growing up, was Danise. And that was because she baked the best snickerdoodles.

Obliviously I was now too old to realize that not only was she too old, wanting to marry someone because of snickerdoodles was a tad bit unhinged.

“O-Okay,” Isiah replied. “So you haven’t… you haven’t liked anyone before?”

“Well I like you,” I started, not fucking thinking at all before I rushed out “I-I-I-I mean- as like- as in like a best friends way, like-”

“I-I y-yes- yeah, n-no I got that-” Isiah explained as he struggled to clear his throat. “I- I meant like… romantically.”

“R-Right,” I replied as I worked to soothe my heart rate. It was through the fucking roof right now all thanks to the lack of a filter my mouth had on it. “I… I guess I haven’t. I dunno. I spent most of my trip just missing you-” I cut my own words off there, still not realizing what it meant to shut the fuck up for once.

“… oh…” Isiah all but fucking whispered that, further shifting the entire trajectory of this conversation. How the complete hell did I bomb my way through this conversation so horribly? “S-So during that whole year-”

“Let’s forget I said that,” I rushed out quickly as I worked to do some damage control on the mess I opened up by asking him about Ryker. This conversation almost had me out of bed pacing the fuck out of my room in an effort to calm down.

“Nah,” Isiah replied, forcing my posture into the best fucking position it’s ever been in.

“W-W-What?” I ask incredulously.

“Nah. You can erase it from your memory but just know I’m not erasing it from mine. And because I can literally feel you spiraling from here, let’s change the subject. You think about my pitch?”

Somehow, someway, that shit pivoted my entire mood and I found myself laughing. “The Richard Reed one?”

“Yes indeed,” Isiah answered quickly.

“While I absolutely love that mind of yours, I’m thinking we pursue either the Applications of Le Chatelier’s Principles or maybe the Percent of Copper in Brass.” I countered.

“That sounds boring,” Isiah protested.

“Chemistry is, for the most part, very fucking boring,” I then argued.

“It’s our first project together in years. I refuse to have it be boring.” Isiah insisted.

“Oh so we’re reaching superhero heights then?” I asked him, to which Isiah hummed in agreeance.

“We also gotta do well enough to get you in that tourney, remember?” He asked me over the phone. “And while we’re on the subject of months, what are you gonna be for Halloween?”

“Halloween?” I asked, my brain not even working fast enough to process that that was in fact coming up.

“Yeah, I’m thinking of being Beast Boy from Teen Titan… you’d make one hot Raven now that I think about it.”

“Deal,” I whispered without even fucking giving it a second thought.

“For real?” He asked me, but I was so far past explaining what the hell was going on in my brain, all I could do was hum a yes.

Raven was a solid character… even if I did ship her with no one else but Beast Boy…

••

12. Friends Without The Benefits

Warning: Explicit Content (nothing too crazy lol)

Isiah

I didn’t know why I was so hell bent on torturing myself like this.

I also didn’t know what the hell was going on with Ryker.

I thought back to what happened once he picked me up after school this afternoon…

“Here,” Ryker handed me a cigarette as soon as I entered his car, which I gladly accepted.

“How bad is it? He back yet?” I asked him as he started driving out of the school’s back lot. We were heading to a spot at a park about five minutes from Averin High where we usually parked to smoke because Ryker’s abusive fucking father was in one of his moods again.

He had kicked Ryker in the ribs hard after throwing him to the floor of the shop last night, and I knew it was bad because Ryker wouldn’t have met me out on the football field like that otherwise. Especially not at school. We didn’t have long to chat considering Dylan and I had spent every last possible minute we could, together out there, but I told Ryker we’d meet up after classes for a bit before I had to get home.

The man placed the blunt he had rolled before picking me up, in his mouth, keeping one hand on the steering while he used the other to lift up his shirt and show me rather than tell me.

The bruise was fucking horrible, with deep purple spread all across the side of his stomach. I visibly winced at the sight of it, yet Ryker tried insisting tit wasn’t as bad as it looked. I wasn’t sure what the hell the two guys were fighting about, but nothing warranted something so damn vicious.

“You gotta get the fuck out that house, man. One of these days, he’s going to kill you.”

Ryker went quiet for a moment as he pulled his car into the empty parking lot of the park while I first lit my cigarette then passed the lighter over for his blunt.

“I’ll figure it out,” was all Ryker mumbled to me as he got the blunt going. “Now enough about me. Why didn’t you tell me Dylan’s back?”

That question forced my gaze out the passenger side window of his car for a moment, unsure of how to answer him.

“You told me you two had a falling out before he left for Ireland… but that doesn’t quite seem to be true anymore. The way you acted around him this afternoon… you… you like him, don’t you. Like as in more than just a friend. You don’t get that soft with anyone.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” I bit back a bit harshly, still refusing to look Rykers way until he passed the blunt off to me, stretching his hands out right in front of my face and waving it at me to get my attention. I watched as smoke quickly filled the car, escaping out the passenger side window I had cracked open for the cigarette I was alternating with the blunt.

“Well too fucking bad. Seeing as I’m the closest fucking thing to a boyfriend you’ve got, I think I have a right to know if you’re crushing on someone. Especially your literal longest fucking friend- like what the fuck , Izzy?”

“It’s not what it sounds like.”

“It sounds like you like your former/not former best friend.”

“It’s… complicated.”

“Is he even gay?” Ryker asked, accepting the blunt after I took a few puffs myself and passed it back over. I wasn’t planning on smoking too much, but since my mum was working later today, I decided I could use those few hours to sober up and get some homework done before she got home later.

I wanted my entire afternoon tomorrow to be free of homework, so Dylan and I could focus on our science project together.

“I don’t think so. It doesn’t matter though. He and I are keeping things at just friends.”

Ryker cackled at that, before his laughter quickly became a fit of coughs from the thick smoke. “Have you seen the way you look at him? You sure as hell look like you want to fuck him. Desperately . I mean I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so fucking mesmerized before-”

“Shut up, Ryker,” I snapped at him, but he didn’t give a shit. He never did.

“Honestly, it kinda pissed me off. You’ve never once looked at me like that.”

“Ryker, we’re not fucking dating. We just blow each other from time to time.” I knew my words were harsh, but what I really didn’t need was this man getting jealous over something that would never happen between Dylan and I.

He didn’t really have a right to get jealous at all. It was a casual thing- what he and I had going. And we never took it further than a few blowjobs even though Ryker wanted to have sex. And he mentioned it constantly, telling me that he’d be gentle and whatnot but I didn’t want to take things that far. He even offered to bottom, but I told him no.

There was only one person I wanted inside me, and it sure as fucking hell wasn’t Ryker.

Just that thought alone… being that intimate with Dylan… it was a dangerous fucking thought, and yet I still thought about it. Much more often than I should’ve.

“Why don’t I give you a blowjob now? I’m a bit horny at the moment. And clearly, you are too.” Rykers eyes cast down to my growing dick that was started to press up against the fabric of my jeans.

This… this wasn’t because of Ryker. It was because I had been picturing Dylan naked… the deep mess of his voice and what he’d sound like… especially moaning my name. It damn near made my entire body shiver deeply at the thought of that.

Of the thought of him simply touching me- his hands all over me.

“I’m not in the mood,” I told Ryker, but he handed off the blunt to me before he reached for the buckle of my jeans. “I’m fucking serious, Ryker, I’m not-”

“Just pretend I’m Dylan,” he spoke quietly as he got my buckle undone.

“I’m not fucking doing that,” I replied quickly, already feeling my dick start to go soft. It wasn’t that Ryker wasn’t hot or anything, he for sure had some looks on him… but now that Dylan was back, and we were speaking again, I didn’t really want whatever relationship this was anymore.

Above all else, I knew Dylan didn’t approve of me hanging with Ryker, and he was trying his best not to impose his thoughts on me. He was trying hard not to do anything to create a rift between him and I again… regardless of how badly I wanted him to react. To even perhaps be just a smidge bit off about Ryker and I having a sexual relationship, which was just wishful fucking thinking on my part.

“Think of his warm mouth around your cock…” Ryker continued as he freed my semi hard dick from my pants, ignoring my protests completely. Then he bent his head down further, bringing my leaking tip to his lips. “Just close your eyes and imagine I’m him. I don’t care.”

That was such a fucked up request, and Ryker knew it too. I refused to fucking do that with Dylan. It was a line I wasn’t willing to cross. I also knew that Ryker wasn’t going to stop until he made me cum so while he began sucking me off, I simply thought of Dylan. Not of Dylan giving me a blowjob, but of just him.

His broad shoulders. His height. His smile . His beautiful freaking laugh.

It took nothing for me to get rock fucking solid again,  and when Ryker hummed his approval around my cock, my hand that wasn’t holding the blunt reached into his jet black locks, and I shoved more of my dick inside him, down his throat.

If he wanted to still push for this after I already said no, I wasn’t going to make it the most pleasant experience. Honestly, something in me told me that after today, I was ending the benefits part of our friendship.

My hands gripped his hair tighter as I started to fuck Ryker’s face harder, still making sure that he didn’t put any pressure on that bruised side of his with how he was leaning over the center console. And as I got rougher, closer to coming, I held Rykers head down as he gagged on me, feeling the tightness of his throat before I shot my load directly inside, my grunts dying down quickly after that brief yet intense orgasm.

Ryker didn’t like swallowing but I didn’t really care this afternoon. And he had more than enough of a build to push me away from him if he wanted to, but he didn’t, letting me know he didn’t really care today either.

Just two guys doing whatever and not giving a shit about the other. It made me feel disgusting.

I ended up lighting the blunt again since it had gone out, then I watched rather awkwardly as Ryker jerked himself off, moaning my name as he did. This was usually when he’d beg me to reciprocate, but he knew not to even fucking ask today.

There was no part of me that wanted to do that. Not with him.

I couldn’t even imagine how sex would be with him.

“I told you to imagine Dylan,” Ryker spoke as he cleaned his dick with some napkins he had just came into, then he tossed them into a random plastic bag at the back of his car and accepted the blunt I passed him after getting his jeans zipped up and buttoned.

“And I told you I’m not fucking doing that,” I replied.

“Yeah, I can see that. I don’t think you’d ever be that rough with him… next time, you should imagine me as him.” Ryker spoke casually.

“I don’t want there to be a next time, Ryker. We made things complicated when we added the benefits bit.” I replied honestly.

I knew that Dylan wasn’t mine, yet somehow this still felt like some weird way of cheating… which made absolutely no fucking sense but I didn’t like how it felt.

“You say that now, Izzy, but you and I both know you still have needs. That was how this whole thing started anyways, remember?”

Ryker had admittedly been a good distraction while I was trying everything under the fucking sun to forget about Dylan… but now he was back, and there wasn’t a blowjob in the world that could erase his importance in my life. Even if I knew I’d never get to be with him the way I selfishly wanted.

I’d accept whatever way he’d offer, even if it was just friends.

“Drive me home, Ryker.” I told the man seriously.

And that was where we lefts things at.

After my phone call with Dylan tonight, I didn’t know what the hell to think anymore.

“ I pretty much spent the year missing you. “

That sentence occupied every last bit of my mind. As did Dylan’s comment about perhaps… perhaps someone he’d pursue might not be a woman.

I had gone through this whole day telling myself that I had absolutely zero chance with him… but now I wasn’t so sure anymore. Dylan hadn’t thought of anyone else all these years, especially this last year, but I was fucking terrified to even think of trying to court the damn man. I had made such a complete fucking mess when I kissed him on that couch then bolted, that even the thought of losing him again like that made me want to physically walk into oncoming traffic.

I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t make things weird between us again.

I got up early once again, having my mum drop me off at school on her way to work so I could get there before Dylan. I loved getting to watch him walk into first period, allowing our eyes to lock as his searched for and quickly found mine.

I loved seeing what he chose to wear each day this week, and this Friday morning was a thick white turtleneck sweater with khaki slacks, a look that accentuated every pristine fucking feature, from his beautiful light, piercing eyes, to his dark shaggy hair, his paler skin, and that incredible fucking build that made me just about drool every time I caught sight of him.

Hearing his deep voice over the phone last night was such an insane turn on, but getting to hear it this morning as he quickly made his way towards the desk beside mine, beat out everything else.

“Hi,” he had the most beautiful, excited smile on his face that made more heat rise to my face than I was originally anticipating.

“Hi,” I had mirrored that smile from the second he stepped into this otherwise pretty empty classroom. Zinfel was at his desk up front which forced us to keep our voices low, but Dylan just scooted his desk a bit closer to mine.

“So I’ll meet you at my locker after last period?” He asked me quietly. His cologne made me all the more fucking light headed. I wanted his scent all over and around me- on my clothes… on my fucking bed sheets like how it lingered when he’d spend nights over at mine.

“Yeah,” I nodded as my smile stretched. “I still cannot believe Don gave you his vehicle. That’s… that’s actually insane.”

When Dylan told me over the phone last night that he was driving us to his this afternoon, I was thoroughly surprised to hear that Don had offered up his baby. I mean sure, the man never really drove these days, but still. It was an unexpectedly sweet gesture on Don’s part.

And knowing Dylan, I was positive he had never treated something so carefully. That car cost more than some people’s homes, including mine.

“I’m honestly still shocked my damn self.” Dylan muttered, shaking his head slowly in clear disbelief. “Don’t worry though, I am one very safe driver. You’re in good hands.”

That had me cracking up as I started to pull out my notebook from my backpack whilst Dylan did the same. I hadn’t doubted that at all, for there was literally no way in hell Don would let him drive if he was even an ounce of reckless.

I couldn’t lie though… I didn’t remember the last time I was this excited about anything. It would be just Dylan and I all afternoon, with us doing something as domestic as cooking dinner tonight.

But because of my excitement, this day just about dragged on with everything it had in it.

Zinfel had spent the entire class period just lecturing. We received our assessment we had done together yesterday, to which Dylan and I scored a 98%, the highest in the class which Zinfel surprisingly congratulated us for.

Jacob looked like he wanted to kill me, and when I caught sight of his score, an 84%, I understood his animosity towards me. He’d for sure struggled with this one.

While I was hoping since it was Friday, today could be a bit of a throw away, but it felt like every damn class period wanted to squeeze out what was left of this school week before finally releasing us from those shackles just as the bell rang.

Dylan and I had time to continue our project during forth period but most of it was spent with him and I going back and forth on what we wanted to do.

I still felt strongly about my superhero take, and while Dylan somewhat still entertained my stance, he kept rerouting us to something more practical… that didn’t require a state of the art underground superhero lab.

Our debate comfortably trickled into lunch time where he and I sat facing each other on the bleachers, him munching on my sandwich and chips while I ate more of his pasta and helped myself to another green apple.

There was absolutely nothing that beat our conversations and how natural they always were. It just put me at ease, resulting in me not wanting to head back in just yet, even if we shared one more period together. I just wanted more of these moments with him. And after suffering through those last two classes, I all but fucking sprinted to Dylan’s locker, ready to get the hell out of here.

“Let’s go,” I heard a deep, familiar voice say from behind me before I felt a hand slip into mine…

And the grin that swiftly spread across my face as I allowed this tall man to drag me out of a filling hallway, was immediate.

••

13. Your Forever Person

Dylan

I couldn’t fucking wait to get Isiah and I out of school.

I mean that genuinely, I all but dragged him all the way out to the car, his light laughter falling past his lips behind me as he allowed himself to be kidnapped. I expected some protests from him from how fast my pace was with my longer strides, but he kept up just fine with his hand tightening its hold in mine.

We both climbed into my Pops SUV once we made it, before I got us situated and eventually followed the rest of the cars filled with seniors who were just about as ready to get the fuck out of here as we were.

My hands were kept on that steering wheel at all times, however I would be telling one whole ass lie if I said my attention was fully on the road as I drove.

“ God , what a long day.“ Isiah sighed, taking full advantage of the heated seats that had kicked on as I watched him relax further into the luxury leather material. I went ahead and cranked the setting up a notch, enjoying his deeper sighs he released over the soft sound of the radio.

It wasn’t a long drive home… but something about it being just Isiah and I while I drove felt like a full circle moment for all the times he and I had spent together in the back seats when my dad drove, with good ol Pops refusing to let me sit in the front seat until I was literally fucking fourteen.

Which was insane if you asked me.

I tried to keep my eyes on the road, but my gaze kept shifting to Isiah who looked so unbelievably relaxed . I genuinely felt how he did- completely drained after our first week back at it. Summer felt like it had come and gone without a trace.

Honestly, I was ready to just get home and relax with him. He hadn’t been over in a year, yet it felt like it had been about ten since he was last here.

And while I wanted to park the car up front so we could say hi to Danise on the way in, I decided Isiah and I could just walk down later. The anxiety of getting out of the school parking lot alone with a bunch of teenagers who barely knew how to drive was enough stress for the day, with us all almost playing a wild game of bumper cars in the school lot.

I wanted nothing more than to park this car in the safest of places and shut the engine off so I could release the breath I was absolutely holding while driving.

“Man,” Isiah spoke, reaching for the underground parking door opener that was clipped to the sun visor of the car for me before I could, making me smile. “It feels like I’m coming back to a second home.”

“Well, you kinda are,” I replied with an even larger smile as I carefully drove the SUV in. Dad always spoke about how he’s expand the underground parking here to it wasn’t so tight a fit, but he hadn’t gotten around to it yet. “My dad hasn’t changed anything in the year we were gone.”

“Really?” Isiah asked. “Well, I’m glad he at least took some time off. Sounds like you guys got to really live in the moment in Ireland and all that wholesome jazz. I’m happy for you.”

That only made my smile widen further.

Isiah always had such a relaxed nature to him that managed to soothe my horribly disjointed thoughts.

“I really wish you came,” I told him honestly, surprising even myself by such levels of honesty. And as I finally got this car into the slot and parked the fucker, I witnessed the warmest smile grace Isiah’s lips once I finally had the opportunity to look away from the windshield and at him fully.

“Let’s take another trip there together sometime soon then. I’ve been saving up with the odd jobs I’ve been doing during the summer, and I’ll pick up more hours this coming summer for it.” Isiah told me seriously, forcing more warmth through my body than these heated seats could only dream of.

I wanted to tell him that my father could cover his ticket… but I knew Isiah too well. He liked paying for things himself- he liked the independence that came with it, so I always tried to keep things fair between us.

“How about this,” I offered, unbuckling my seatbelt as Isiah did the same before we stepped out of the warm vehicle. “You held me test out of a language for college next year, and I’ll cover your ticket. This way you can still keep on track with working to buy a car. I wouldn’t have much fun in Ireland thinking about you dipping into your savings for it.”

Isiah soon joined me at my side after he grabbed his own backpack from the back seat, yet the look he was giving me made me slow as we headed towards the underground entrance to The Alpines.

“You… you remembered that?” He asked me hesitantly, which just produced a nervous smile out of me.

“Of course,” I replied, turning to him as I reached for the door to hold open for us. “I know you don’t like talking about it because you’ve only ever mentioned it once and that was two years ago when we both got our licenses… but you’ve been working your ass off each summer. I want you to get something for you.”

Isiah’s lips tugged up into a smile that forced my gaze away as we walked towards the elevators with our backpacks slug over our shoulders.

“I don’t want to spend our time in Ireland thinking of you working that hard just for a trip. You like your freedom, and owning a car can give you more of that. Do that first.”

I heard Isiah chuckle lightly as he reached to press the elevator button. Once it opened, we stepped inside and I used my dad’s fob to unlock the penthouse floor for us before pressing the button.

“You’ve got some wicked memory, I swear… but testing out of a language might take a while ass miracle. Divine intervention if you may.”

That made me laugh even more nervously. Isiah wasn’t wrong… I barely passed Spanish 1 and 2 my freshman and sophomore year. It was the only thing I struggled with- learning a new language.

“I’ll still do it, though.” He assured me. “You just have to promise you’ll commit. We have quite the uphill battle when it comes to you and languages.”

“I will!” I rushed out quickly, grinning wider once I turned to him and the elevator started moving. “I swear it!”

Isiah chuckled even harder. “What you lack in foreign pronunciation, you sure do make up for in ambition.” He then noted.

“You’re the best teacher,” I countered. “If it’s you teaching me, I’ll care enough to try.”

And the look this man gave me had me praying this elevator would move quicker.

I wanted to be inside my home with him. And I wanted to dump this heavy as shit backpack off somewhere stat.

Isiah still insisted his superhero idea couldn’t completely die out just yet… but he eventually came around to the rate of decomposition of calcium carbonate. I could feel his disappointment in not having his Reed Richards moment, yet when I reminded him of our Halloween costumes I so freely agreed to, that seemed to soothe him some.

“I think we should go shopping together,” Isiah told me as he opened up his school laptop to start getting a list of materials together. “I want to see how you’d style a gender neutral Raven.”

That made me laugh from our position on the floor of my living room, both of us leaning back against the edge of the couch. We were both sitting cross-legged next to each other, using the coffee table in front of us to hold all our school work.

“You just want to see me in tights,” I teased him, moving to bump his shoulder with my upper arm.

“Is that a possibility?” He asked me, making me turn to him with a look.

“No,” I then assured him as I rolled my eyes. “I’ll be wearing light pants and a tight black shirt. The real star of the show is going to be the cape, and at least I won’t have to dye my hair or anything.”

“Booooo,” Isiah answered immediately, giving me a stellar grin before turning back to the laptop that was nestled in his crossed legs. “I’m going to have to figure out whether I’m painting my whole body, or if I can just get away with spray painting my hair or some shit.”

“I say,” I replied as I pulled more notes from my backpack. “That you could get away with just the hair if you’re going all out with his purple outfit. But if you plan on wearing one of his casual looks then you better channel your inner fucking grinch and paint that sun-kissed skin.”

That had Isiah full on laughing. “Have you seen Beast Boy? I think I’d look stupid in his usual outfit. Hell, he kinda looks a bit stupid in his usual outfit.”

I almost told this man to take that back, for I quite liked Beast Boy’s fit… yet I found myself uttering something else entirely when thinking of Isiah in it.

“Not with how you look now,” I mumbled as I started writing out our outline for this project. I hadn’t even realized I said that until Isiah’s next question.

“Do you like it, then? … how I look now?” He asked me a tad bit more quietly, forcing me to turn my head his way almost immediately. The way he was looking at me however forced my gaze back to my notepad just as quickly.

I swear I was just starting to say any fucking thing around this man this week.

“It’s… I.. y-yes, I um… I think you- it looks nice. Y-You’ve uh… you’ve been working out more.”

“So have you,” Isiah replied, and in that very moment, I wished he and I weren’t sitting so damn close. There was no where I could look that would hide the redness I’m sure was spreading across my pale face, and at such a rapid rate.

“Y-Yeah, my dad and Carson had me up bright and early for a workout with them during our trip. Good ol Pops was terrified I’d put on too much weight from all the rich food we ate.” I explained, unable to meet this man’s gaze.

“I like it,” Isiah spoke rather lightly. “It suits you, I mean.”

“It suits you too-” I started, before catching myself. “I-I mean your build suits you, too.”

“I know,” Isiah told me, and at first I thought it was his cockiness showing, until he added, “you called me gorgeous, remember?”

And the way my entire body reacted to that made me wish we were talking over the phone or something instead. I hadn’t meant to take the conversation in this direction at all , yet I had never been able to lie around Isiah.

Not efficiently, anyway.

“I…” I started, still focusing heavily on my damn notes. “Yeah… yeah, I remember.”

To remedy my fucking awkwardness, my brain reminded me that objectively speaking, anyone would find Isiah’s build to be nice. Very nice. What I couldn’t quite justify however was how much I loved what came along with it. His cologne. The light scent of cigarettes from time to time. The slight change in his scent that I detected this morning, then all but confirmed while we were in my dad’s car.

Most importantly… I couldn’t really justify how beautiful I found his eyes.

Or why I couldn’t hold his gaze at times. I had always been able to in the past.

“S-So you and Ryker… you two don’t have any Halloween plans?” I asked, almost facepalming myself for bringing that up now as soon as those words left my lips. It felt like I was crashing and burning through this entire conversation, and at such an expertise, rapid pace at that.

What the complete hell was up with me this week?

“Nah,” Isiah shook his head. “He and I are kinda going through it right now. I sort of ended the benefits part of the friends with benefits relationship yesterday.”

That made me whip my head towards Isiah so damn fast I almost snapped my fucking neck.

“Y-You… you… you did?”

Isiah’s eyes had seemingly never left mine. And he gave me a slow nod. “It was… well, it was complicating things.”

My brain was operating at about a mile a minute, yet I just nodded before turning back to my notes. I thought that might’ve been the end of things but my brain sent words to my mouth before I could fall into the rather challenging process of simply shutting the fuck up for once.

“Were you… starting to develop feelings?”

“W-What? No. It was actually the opposite I guess,” Isiah replied, yanking my gaze right back to him again.

“The opposite?” I asked him far more curiously than I should’ve. God, I knew I was prying, but I couldn’t stop myself now.

“Yeah, I just- I didn’t have feelings at all. And when you asked me if I loved him-”

“I shouldn’t have asked that,” I muttered quietly, cringing at how fucking invasive a question that was when we had only just started talking again this week.

Fucking hell, Dylan.

“I’m glad you did,” Isiah said lightly as those hazel-green eyes of his held mine. I didn’t understand how he could still handle me so well, especially when I asked some insane shit like that. “It made me realize that I didn’t. That I probably wasn’t someone to handle a friends with benefits dynamic. It was just filling a void, which wasn’t fair for Ryker either.”

“A void?” I asked more quietly. I was starting to try to reel myself in, but I still wanted to know more. And Isiah finally broke my gaze as his eyes returned to his laptop.

“Just… loneliness or whatever. It helped scratch an itch but as I thought about it, you made me realize that I don’t want to be intimate like that with anyone other than someone I genuinely like.”

“O-Oh…” I found myself nodding, turning back to my notes quickly.

“Yeah. And I think it’s best that he and I are just friends. He could use a solid friend right now, and the itch I have isn’t in a place he can reach anyway. It felt a bit disgusting to still have him try. I rather just stay with the uncomfortable feeling than complicate up our friendship.”

Was… was that how Isiah saw us?

Wait, no, I reminded myself. Isiah had already said he was over that crush. He… he didn’t… feel that way about me anymore.

“So… so that itch… it’s still there then? The um… like the craving of intimacy or whatever?” I tried to act more casual like Isiah always was, but there was a slight strain in my voice that just made me sound like the most nosiest of Nancys.

“I-… I mean yeah. We’re teenagers, Dylan. I’m pretty sure the horniness is pretty expected of us. I’m just fine with waiting until the right one comes along.” Isiah explained, making my heart sort of constrict in a not so comforting way.

“And you… you don’t think you’ve found them- that person yet?”

I absolutely refused to look at Isiah while asking that, but I could feel his intense, assertive gaze on me.

He took a moment before replying. “I’m not sure.” His voice held nothing but honesty with his words. “How about yourself? How would you describe your forever person if they were to stumble into your life?”

That question drew me silent for seemingly the first time since this conversation fucking started, and had me thinking for a good, long minute. How would I describe them?

I thought about Carson and my dad. How their own relationship had blossomed. And how strongly I supported it.

“I would… well I would want to be with someone who knows me, like Carson knows my dad.” I replied with equal honesty as I kept their relationship in mind. “Someone who can change my mood like Carson can with my Pops. And someone who can make me laugh like my dad does with Carson, ya know?” I asked, yet my eyes remained on the notes I was absolutely no longer taking.

I was just doodling on the page at this point.

“Yeah,” Isiah replied in a more hushed tone. “Yeah, I get that… what else?”

“Well, they’d have to be smart for starters because I like learning.” I continued, to which Isiah chuckled lightly as a warm response. “And… and nerdy. And sweet, but also assertive because sometimes I still find it hard to stick up for myself when I know I need to.”

Isiah had said nothing at first which made me slowly, finally turn my head back to him, and he murmured a bit more quietly, “keep going.”

That had me looking back at my notes swiftly.

Well at the spider web I was drawing in the corner of the page.

“I… I want someone humble. I live here now, but I didn’t always. And like my dad, I don’t ever want to forget where I started. I want it to ground me as it does him.”

“ I know ,“ I heard this man say, which made my body stir again. I found myself shifting a bit on this floor, unable to calm whatever my heart had slowly started to do. “Keep… keep going ,” he then whispered, and my hands tightened their hold on my notepad and pen, forcing me to calm down at the mere sound of his voice.

“Someone who-… who likes a challenge like I do. And can perhaps deal with me when I… well, when I’m not that good with words.” I couldn’t help but think: like now . “And someone that would like… be patient with me. There’s a lot I haven’t really done yet… so my person would have to know me well enough to notice when I hesitate. Know me well enough for me to trust them with everything. Like… like all my secrets and stuff…”

“Dylan,” Isiah spoke softly. “Will you… will you look at me?”

I was honestly fucking terrified as all hell to. I didn’t know how red my face was, or if my heart would choose to see herself out right here right now from how sporadic she had decided to do her job. Just starting then stopping on a whim. I knew I was naming qualities that were… that… that he…

Jesus , I was so fucking terrified.

And yet I still turned my head slowly to meet this shorter man’s. He was starting to bring himself to his feet which took me fully by surprise before I watched him stretch his hand down towards me.

“Come on,” his voice was so soft. So fucking gentle , it made my whole body grow weaker than it already was. “Let’s take a break from this project.”

And before I knew it, I was pushing my notes away and slipping my hand into his outstretched one, allowing him to pull me up off the plush white carpet, simply trusting whatever he wanted to do next, which seemed to be starting in on dinner as he led me towards the kitchen.

I had failed to mention one more thing about my forever person before he pulled me to my feet…

And that was that I wanted someone who managed to put me at ease whenever I started to spiral. Much like I had been now.

Much like Isiah had just done now, calming my wreck of nerves by seamlessly easing us into the next course of action.

He always did that , I thought quietly to myself as a small smile slowly graced my lips and I allowed him to pull me along this time.

There was simply no one else who knew me quite like he did.

No one who could make my heart do what it was doing right now.

••

14. Wreck-It Ralph

Isiah

Externally, I was watching Dylan closely with a relaxed smile playing at my lips as he started to pull out two large wooden chopping boards and some glass bowls from the clean dishwasher, choosing to lay everything out on the kitchen island that would seemingly become our work station for the evening.

I still couldn’t believe the time had escaped us so quickly that it was already around 5PM. I thought it was probably best we started figuring out dinner now, then we could always get back to the project after if Dylan wanted. He and I had honestly gotten a massive head start compared to the rest of our class.

Internally, however, my body was approaching the fucking end of the road for its existence.

My heart hadn’t stopped pounding since our conversation on the floor of his living room. I was barely sure what to even focus on, because hearing this man essentially describe his forever person in a way that mirrored our own friendship far too fucking closely was literally almost too much for me to fucking bear.

On one hand, I was telling myself to calm down- calm all the way the hell down . As much as I wanted it to be true, I didn’t want to build up my hopes like that, and after seeing Dylan start to slowly become more and more increasingly unsure of himself, I decided we’d just table this conversation entirely.

I had allowed him to pry when it came to Ryker because even if I had told Dylan that I was over my crush on him… I wanted him to know that… well, that I viewed that level of intimacy as important. I didn’t want him to think that I, personally, wanted to do those things with anyone besides someone I liked in that way.

I had no issues with others having friends with benefits, but when it came to what I personally wanted, when I decided to be with someone in that way, I wanted to be with them in every way, not just sexually.

And yes, I was very aware that this didn’t quite scream horny teenager . I was actually sure I was probably the odd one out from that perspective amongst my fellow peers.

My heart felt like I needed a built in pacer. Hell, I’d take Iron Man’s Arc Reactor because in this current moment being alone with Dylan, it felt like there was a piece of shrapnel lodged inside me threatening to puncture the erratic thing at any fucking moment.

Equivalent to the other shoe dropping or some shit.

“So,” I asked, watching this taller man slow his movements before he turned back to look at me. His face still had the pinkish remnants of those deep red hues that had scattered across his face and neck, touching his ears during the duration of our conversation. “What exactly are we making?”

That seemed to slow Dylan to a stop entirely. “ Shit . Wait, we didn’t work that out yet, did we…“

More redness returned to his face, and now I was simply just questioning what was going on in that genius mind of his. I would give literally anything to have Jean Grey’s superpowers- the ability to penetrate one’s mind to reveal their thoughts- except I’d bow out from the phoenix powers if at all possible.

Those seemed erratic as fuck.

“No,” I shook my head slowly, working to dial back the intensity of my gaze because his face was getting redder and redder with each passing moment. “But how about we make some Boxty? I’m guessing you probably had a lot of it in Ireland though, so we can always make anything el-”

“That’s perfect!” Dylan cut in, and he did so with a smile so beautiful that it had my hand damn near grasping at my heart above my cotton t-shirt.

Shit , I needed to get it together now.

Like right now.

Like before I potentially accidentally hurt the fuck out of myself in this kitchen while distracted.

“We actually surprising didn’t eat a lot of it, and when we did, it wasn’t exactly like how my dad made it- how my grandmother taught him too. Since so much of our family wanted to spend time with me, Pops, and Carson, we also didn’t really cook much for them. We did learn a lot, but they definitely didn’t let my dad run point on a damn thing.”

That made my comforting smile grow. “That must’ve been cool,” I replied, “learning with your dad for a change.”

And the smile Dylan gave me as he nodded, put my body out of commission for one good, long minute. Luckily, it was his turn to speak, otherwise the gibberish threatening to fall past my lips would’ve left me so goddamn embarrassed.

“Yeah,” Dylan admittedly, “I think it was maybe the first time I’ve seen my dad learn something around me. He always just… knew things, ya know? And he told me all the time that a lot of what he knew was self taught, yet seeing how quickly he was able to adapt around his- well, our family there… I dunno.” Dylan paused a moment, collecting his thoughts rather carefully before he voiced them. “It made me realize I’m still, even now, learning so much about my old man.”

I wasn’t even sure how to respond to that.

I knew how I wanted to. I just wanted to touch him. In any capacity. A hug, a kiss, a handhold, hell even just placing my hand gently over his when I saw him rest both his larger ones on the kitchen island.

“Alright,” Dylan continued with a bit more enthusiasm as the redness that once spread across his face, started to settle again, “how about this: venison steak, boxty, and a stir fry with broccoli and asparagus?”

I didn’t even waste a single second saying “that sounds fucking phenomenal. You have venison steak? “

Dylan quickly nodded. “My dad’s still cool with that one business exec guy who likes to hunt a lot. We just got what that eccentric man likes to call a meat care package, so the steaks should be in the fridge. I think my dad was planning to get around to it one of these last few days but work hasn’t really made that possible for him.”

Jesus , that sounded delicious. “I’m game,” I told Dylan. “Put me to work, Head Chef! What am I doing first?”

“Well, I hate to fucking say it… but we’re going to need to pull out vegetables. A lot of them. Boxty and steak will probably be deemed as too ‘heavy’ in the eyes of my father, so this’ll offset his complaints.”

That got one good fucking chuckle out of me. Dylan would take any and every moment he could to badmouth the healthy stuff, though I’m sure after his year in Ireland, he was missing the hearty, rich food there.

It seemed like his distaste for vegetables had come back with a vengeance once he returned to the States.

“Could you pull a red bell pepper, a green bell pepper, two jalapeños, a large carrot stick, the fresh snap peas in the glass container at the bottom shelf, a package of mushrooms, and the large broccoli florets that my dad hopefully got around to sealing next to the snap peas this week?” Dylan was listing off things quickly as he got back into his own movements, pulling spices and flour from the cabinets about the stove and back counters, and so I got to it.

I made it to the fridge as I recited each ingredient silently in my head, making sure I got everything he had mentioned.

From the extensive list of vegetables alone, I now understood the pain in the man’s voice that grew as he listed each one off. And as I made my way to and from the open fridge and the kitchen island, Dylan looked to be rummaging through more cupboards for something.

I had my back turned to him at some point with me facing the full fridge to grab the last ingredient, the mushrooms, only to be pulled from my concentration by the sound of something clattering against the tiles floor before Dylan hissed the word “shit!”

That had me turning around quickly to see if he was okay, only to witness this tall man crouched down at a cupboard under the kitchen island, staring the the cupboard door that was now laying off its hinges and on the tile.

I shut the fridge immediately and made my way back over to him, setting the mushrooms on the counter before crouching down myself so we could both inspect the small door.

“Well, fuck me, Mr. Hulk,” I noted, my right arm raising itself so my fingers could further inspect the broken hinge that had been ripped out with the door. “How the actual hell did you do this? “

Dylan muttered another “ shit “ quietly before brining the palm of his large hand up to his forehead in clear distress. “I don’t even know… but what do you think the devil would accept as a welcome gift? Because my father will send me straight to hell if he sees this.”

My fingers examined even more of the holes that were left when the nails were ripped out. Then my gaze finally shifted to Dylan who was crouched beside me, watching where my fingers passed over on the wood.

“Looks like someone is still trying to understand their strength. What’s your secret, Bruce Banner?”

I saw a smile slowly working its way, pushing past all his initial worry before settling on his lips.

“ I’m always hangry ,“ he replied, making me laugh damn near instantly at that glorious reference.

“Come on,” I insisted as I pushed myself to stand from this crouched position, and Dylan hesitantly followed.. “Does your dad have a tool box?”

…the look Dylan gave me said it all.

“ Okay , does Carson have a tool box?“

And that seemed to do the trick, because this handsome guy nodded immediately. “Wait right here, I’ll go get it!”

And I couldn’t stop the light laughter as I nodded, watching this man practically zoom down the hall to his parent’s room while I was left to stare down at the grey painted cupboard still laying hopelessly on the floor.

Honestly, the hole where the screws were originally placed for the hinges did look a bit worn, so regardless of what this situation seemed like, I didn’t really think Dylan’s strength was to fully blame. It was probably just the wear and tear of constantly opening then closing the cupboard itself.

I constantly had to send a reminder to my brain that Don had lived in this exact penthouse for almost twenty years now. He had done a whole lot of restorations to the Alpines, but if we were being honest, he hadn’t done much to this particular penthouse.

At first I questioned why… until I realized the things he did keep. I didn’t know Mr. Whittaker-Jones before he took in Dylan, but something tells me now that back then he probably had people to come in routinely and remodel. Now, I think he preferred just his family. I had noticed Carson would fix more things himself, and I think Don preferred that- his help around here as opposed to strangers in his home.

That simple thought made my settled smile grow. It made this home feel far more lived in than the first year I visited. It felt like a real home now, not some staged place for a catalogue.

And it reminded me yet again of what Dylan had said. About wanting someone humble. He really had been raised by a man who could have it all, and yet was content with spending so little.

There was something that Don had said all those years ago that stuck with me even all these years later, and with every passing year, it took on more and more of a new meaning.

It was the weekend in December when I spent the night before the snow storm that hit New York City, and Don was making us breakfast for dinner. It was the weekend he also decided to come clean about dating Carson… but Dylan had already told me before they even went to Texas for the first time that year, to which I vowed my secrecy as I always had done whenever he and I confided in each other.

That weekend was when we all made gingerbread houses together, with Dylan and myself partnering up while Carson and Don did the same.

Honestly how those two did anything together was miraculous. I believe Don accused Carson of over icing as he pointed to the house on the box for reference, and Carson told Don that shit on the box was held up with prayers and Elmer’s glue. I swear, seeing their dynamic felt like I was home with my own parents.

Honestly, now it made me miss how much more time my own mum and dad had to spend together then. As the years went on, their love never dwindled, but things got more… stressful.

I just had a sense that I needed to be out of their hair soon. To get a scholarship that would allow them to finally release that worry filled breath they had been holding in as they stressed over what expenses college might come with.

That night… it was the first night I had ever heard Don speak of his upbringing. He was going to take us to Richmond park the following day, and when my mum had spoke about it to me before I went to Dylan’s after school, I hadn’t heard such tenderness in her voice before. She was so genuine with her excitement for me going with Dylan and his father, that I really didn’t get it then.

I did now, that was for sure. Richmond park didn’t always look like that, and it was where my mother used to play with her own friends growing up. Barely even a park back then, really.

Don had gestured to his home as we worked on our gingerbread houses, telling me to look around the place and really take it in. At first I thought it was a not-so-humble brag on his part… but then he said something which struck my heart like a semi hitting a bridge it thought it could clear.

“ There is nothing I could ever accumulate to, that would outshine the wealth your parents have. I’m lucky to be apart of this kids life now. Your parents, however? They were there from the start. And in this economy, that’s really saying something. “

I felt myself chuckle lightly just thinking about it now, as I looked around this large penthouse yet again.

I felt that heavy pang of guilt in my heart for having ever let down such a successful man who had seen so much of himself in me. Our time at Richmond Park, Wilmoria’s Cafe, and even Hobbs’s shop the following day just further let little ten year old me know that Don had never cast out his less bountiful past. He made sure he would always carry that part of him.

And seeing Dylan choose to do the same, made his own wishes about being with someone like that so much more understanding.

He had remembered me mentioning I wanted to save up for a car.

I had only told that giant fucker once about it, literally in passing too, yet he remembered. Dylan had such a nonchalant way about certain things, but his memory constantly accosted me at every moment, and so unbelievably unexpectedly.

He was just as observant as his father was.

Silent about things, but always still listening. Perhaps that was probably why they were always in this mental tug of war with each other. It was the battle of the sharpest minds.

And there was just one more thing that had kept me hung up over this entire year, and once he returned… about us keeping each others secrets.

I had ghosted Dylan completely, shutting him out of my life so unbelievably coldly and harsh… and yet, he had told absolutely no one about that kiss. Not even Molly, from the looks of things. He had kept that secret when he had every right not to, just like he had kept all of mine, and I his.

“Found it!” I heard a voice call out from down the hall before Dylan appeared seconds later, and he brought an instant grin to my face with his own, pulling me from that moment of deep emotional turmoil just like he always did. In his hand was a bright red toolbox that was deep enough to seem promising.

I crouched down, and watched him do the same across from me as he set the thing between us on the tiled floor. Then I popped its plastic lock open and removed the drill, before finding new screws that could anchor themselves just a bit deeper into the wood to withstand this home filled with Hulk-like men.

“O-Oh,” Dylan whispered a bit more quietly as he scooted a bit closer. “You’re using the drill? I thought you might just need a screwdriver or something.”

I glanced up at the beautiful man to offer him one stellar smile before I shook my head no.

“The holes in the wood are too worn. I’m going to move the hinges down slightly and creat new ones, then patch those initial holes up with this filler Carson has in here,” I held up the tube next for Dylan to see. “After that and some light sanding, it’ll be good as new. No trip to hell required.”

Dylan inched a little closer again, and I could feel his eyes on me more as I unscrewed the tip of the drill for the bit to go into.

“You… are literally a goddamn superhero, you know that?” He asked me seriously.

“Just not Reed Richards, huh?” I joked back, earning me one full, unexpected yet gorgeous laugh from him.

“ Don’t be like that ,“ he cooed playfully, “once I figure out how to get you an underground lair, I promise we’ll revisit this,” he then assured me. I could hear it in his voice, though… whatever I was doing now was piquing his curiosity to the fullest.

“I’m holding you to that,” I replied before testing the battery of a drill by pulling the trigger, and I was glad to see it was fully charged. It looked like Carson kept his tools as well prepared as I kept mine.

“Is there something you can’t fix?” He mumbled more or less, simply just watching on this floor in front of me as I laid everything else out.

“I’d say your grades in Spanish for starters, but I’ve since agreed to test that theory, so for now… no .” My own teasing and cockiness earned me one pointed scoff from Dylan, but as I glanced up for the final time before starting this project, I saw the sweetness of his happiness all over him.

“Come here,” I beckoned him closer more gently and patted the spot right next to me on this tile. “I’ll teach you how to use one for the days I’m not here to be your Fix-It Felix, my far from little Wreck-It Ralph.”

••

15. Fix-It Felix

Dylan

I wasn’t sure what the actual hell had gotten in me today. This week. Fuck it, this whole last year

“You see this?” Isiah asked, pulling my attention away from the scent I was hyper-fixating on him that was different, to the holes in the wood he had spoken of. I quickly nodded, acting as if that was where my attention was all along.

It damn sure was where it should’ve been , I thought to myself.

“If we were to drill into them again, we’d have to use much, much thicker screws to carve into walls of wood so the ridges of the nail can anchor, understand?”

I nodded quickly, though my face was already starting to heat up at an insanely rapid rate by his… his explanation-

We’re just putting a cupboard door back on , Dylan, my brain had to fucking remind me.

This was informational. Isiah was saying informational words. Words I so desperately needed to start paying more attention to.

“So what I’m going to do with this hinge bracket I also removed from the door itself just a second ago, is drill it back in just a little lower here. Far enough where there’s enough wooden space between the old hole and the new hole, but still not too far because you do want the hinges far enough so the wood is pretty evenly distributed.” Isiah continued.

I watched as he moved the silver bracket down, eyeing the spaces without any actual measurements needed at all. And the way he analyzed the spaces made me understand that he was doing some sort of mental math here… which, inevitably, made me feel… things.

Isiah always surprised me with shit like this.

Then there was that whiff of his cologne again- and of that pleasant scent that accompanied it which was new for him. I felt myself slightly drawn to it as I watched him test the drill again before placing the slightly longer nail he had chosen, right into the top hole of the metal hinge.

I had not noticed Isiah had slowed his movement to a stop entirely, until he damn near whispered something that caught my attention.

“Dylan?” He spoke far more quietly. “I um… I’ll need you to… to move back just a bit.”

I all but fucking toppled backwards by how fast I fucking moved, not realizing our proximity until Isiah turned his head slightly to me right after he spoke and his and my own face were just inches apart.

Fucking shit, Dylan! My brain all but screamed at me, on its hands and knees just begging me to pull it together. “S-S-Sorry, I- I just-”

“It’s… cool, I um… I just don’t want any pieces of wood flying your way.” Isiah explained. His voice was only slightly off, but he still kept that comfortable, relaxed tone with it, probably sensing the mayhem that was my mind at the current moment.

I, on the other hand, looked and sounded like I was about to pray for a quick death at any second here, just begging the good lord or the devil himself to just take me. With every passing piece of time between Isiah and I, I was just making more and more a fool of myself.

“W-What about you?” I asked him quickly as soon as I processed what he had said. And what he answered with before he started that drill did nothing to calm my now raging fucking heartbeat.

“I care about you more. I’ll be fine.”

That sentence… it… it made me feel more things I shouldn’t have been feeling right now. What I should’ve felt was guilt for ripping this damn door out in the first place and having Isiah fix it, as if having to cook dinner wasn’t enough physical labor I had sprung on him last minute.

Isiah started the drill however before I could even begin to think about thinking of a response to that that wouldn’t make me was to shrivel up and die… and I could only watch as the force from the drill itself activated more muscle in his toned arms as he pressed it firmly into the wood, keeping it steady.

He had this look on his face- this concentration that made me honestly unable to look away. I watched far more intently than I should have as he drilled that first nail in easily, before leaving that hinge as is, leaving one part undone, and reaching the next hinge to do the same at the bottom.

I didn’t quite understand why he only did the top hole of the first one, and the bottom of the second, until he stopped the drill to look over at me.

I had to snap all my fucking attention away from this man’s arms- the veins that had now started to raise his tan skin, to meet his gaze.

“Your turn,” he told me gently, passing the drill over to me with the handle stretched out for me to take.

“Are… are you sure?” I asked him. It had looked like I had been paying attention, and yet my eyes weren’t exactly on his technique anymore. Or really ever. They were far, far more fascinated by… well-

“Yeah,” Isiah nodded confidently, urging me to take the drill before he backed out of the space and gestured for me to scoot into it, right near the counter. “I already positioned them and locked them in with the first two screws. All you have to do is position the tip of the nail were the holes are on the hinges, lock the the drill into the carved head of the screw, and slowly pull the trigger. The lighter you are on it, the slower the drill moves. Got it?”

I nodded rather fucking hesitantly as I looked back at Isiah who had pushed himself up on his knees behind me to see what I was doing.

Fucking hell, I thought to myself. I should’ve been paying more attention.

“I’ll be right here, Dylan. You’ll be alright. I’ve got you if you screw up anywhere.”

His voice was as gentle as it always was, from behind me, making it all the more difficult to angle this drill with my left hand

“Here, straight ahead like this.” I saw him reach a hand past my right side so he could position my left hand more straight ahead, yet I swear on my life I almost dropped this surprisingly heavy fucking thing entirely when he placed his hand between the shoulder blades of my back so he could keep himself from falling onto me as he leant forward.

Shit.

…Shit .

“Keep it steady,” he whispered closer to my left ear, sending sudden fucking chills down my body as his scent quickly surrounded me. His hands were gentle yet firm, reminding me that I was still holding a goddamn piece of equipment that could probably hurt us both if I wasn’t careful. I reached for one of the two longer nails he placed on the shelf in the cupboard before positioning it in the hole of the hinge and the undrilled wood.

Luckily, Isiah finally retracted himself to allow me to drill into it on my own…

… and he had been right.

It took almost nothing to get the screw in. He had already done most of the work, which meant I was bending down to screw in that second inner screw for the bottom hinge before I fucking knew it.

“ See ,“ Isiah spoke quietly in that same warm tone from behind me. “ Well done. You’re a natural .“ The way he said that made this damn thing I called a body react even more viscerally. “Now as for the door,” I felt him lean forward yet again , but my body quickly spun around, scrambling out of this. This position.

I had felt that heat rising, amongst… amongst some other heat that was… well it was… it was pooling-

“W-W-Why don’t- w-why don’t you handle that, and I’ll uh- I’ll start getting us ready to cook?”

My voice was a choppy, discombobulated, disgusting mess, only making me seem like even more of a mess… but I couldn’t fucking help it at this point. What I needed with Isiah was just a bit of… space between us… before my body started to do… well… things I didn’t quite understand.

“S-Sure,” Isiah nodded, accepting the drill from my outstretched hand before I quickly and not so gracefully pulled myself to my feet.

Space , I thought again to myself yet again. Yeah. Yeah we… we just needed a little physical space, and the shit my body was doing would eventually settle.

That was at least what I was telling myself.

It came with great despair to report that space did not in fact help a goddamn thing.

I had pulled the bag of potatoes out from the cupboard while Isiah finally drilled the door onto the hinges, aligning it perfectly with the others, however I could barely focus on anything else. My eyes kept returning to watch him as he worked so unbelievably comfortably with Carson’s tools.

He was just so… so fucking confident with every movement. His muscles were the most defined now, reminding me of that conversation in the living room. I had called him- his body- gorgeous while we were eating lunch on the bleachers. And that was because he genuinely was. Objectively speaking.

My dumbass had tasked myself with washing the potatoes as he worked quickly, then I poured the oil in a pot for the Boxty since that would be ready to fry in no time. I also pulled out the steaks from the fridge and was thankful I did because they were still somewhat a bit cold from them being frozen when they made it to us.

The best venison steak was when they were left to come to room temperature. We didn’t have time to let them sit in a full marinade, which meant I opted for more of a marinade/spice bath that we could then just cook them with.

The marinade did call for some red wine which, even though my father didn’t give me his full blessing to crack open, or any blessing at all for that matter, I assured myself that all would be forgiven once he tried the steaks. That and it didn’t call for much anyway.

I was about halfway between forcing myself to pay attention to what I was doing with this marinade, and avoid lingering my gaze on Isiah as he filled the holes that were no use in the wood, before I heard him exclaim eventually, “finished!”

I had been working on the back counters to give him space since the cupboard was under the kitchen island, yet when I turned and glanced over, everything seemed to be already packed up in the tool box besides some sandpaper.

“We just gotta let that filling dry up then I’ll sand it after. Most likely after we finish dinner.” He explained to me as he set the tool box on the floor up against the side of the island and out of the way. Then he went to wash his hands at the kitchen sink. “Holy shit, Dylan, that looks incredible!”

His gaze was locked in on the marinade and spices I was throwing in to transfer into a zip lock bag with the steaks. I genuinely had to keep my eyes focused on what I was doing because I felt my hands start to shake slightly when Isiah got a bit closer.

Too close , I thought quietly. There was still a few feet between us while he dried his hand on the kitchen towel hanging from the oven, but it still felt too fucking close.

“Why… why don’t you start to peel the potatoes?” I offered as I attempting to find anything else for this man to do. “W-We’ll need some mashed, and the rest grated. Maybe about two or three mashed so you can use the small pot on the stove for water.”

“Sure thing,” Isiah nodded, something I was able to catch through my peripheral, yet I still kept my eyes on my own tasks as I reached a conflicting thought.

I didn’t want my time to be anywhere near over with Isiah, but right now I also wasn’t sure how to act normal again while around him. It felt like I was ruining our time together by being so fucking awkward.

Even… even as I watched him pour some water into the small pot to boil… and as I heard him start to peel… I still forced my eyes to remain right here, removing the steaks from their vacuumed seal and pouring my marinade spice mixture into the jumbo zip locks before placing the two massive steaks into each one.

It was when I heard Isiah mutter “ fucking hell! “ that pulled my attention back to him immediately. It had me taking quick strides to the kitchen island behind me to check in, and my worry had brought me right up to his right side to take a look.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” I asked immediately, yet I noticed that he had only peeled one potato in that entire time I had left him.

“Yeah, sorry, no I’m fine. Just frustrated. I’ve honestly never been the best with a peeler. I usually just use a knife.”

I glanced down at how he was using it however, and the faintest, lightest laugh passed my lips before I could stop it.

“That’s because you’re peeling them weird with it. Here,” I reached out my left hand to him at his right, and he allowed me to remove the potato from it. “Hold it like this,” I explained, showing him where I was positioning it in my palm and where I placed my fingers. He then handed me the peeler next as he watched closely. “You want to pull it towards you.”

“Ah shit. Yeah that makes way more sense.”

“Well I mean you could strike it like you’re passing out stacks of 1’s at a strip club but we might have Boxty with a side of your finger tips if you’re not careful,” I joked, pulling some abrupt laughter out of Isiah which only made my smile widen

“Sounds delicious,” he teased, glancing up from the potato I was holding to look at me.

“Doesn’t it?” I grinned, yet I concentrated on peeling this one the rest of the way before setting it in a glass bowl, and reaching across the counter easily to hand Isiah another from the freshly washed supply. “Now you.” I instructed, handing Isiah the peeler as well.

I watched as he started to peel down, yet his grip on this more oddly shaped potato still wasn’t safe enough for my liking…

And this was what I was planning to use to justify the next utterly insane course of action I have possibly ever taken with anyone a day before in my entire existence.

“L-Like this, goofy ,” I spoke to him as my left arm wrapped around Isiah while my body moved closer to his side, only partially positioned behind him with enough space between us where I could still slide my left hand under his left one.

“D-Dyl-”

“Y-You’ve… you’ve got to tuck your fingers back. Even carving down can still knick your pinky if you’re not careful.” My words were quieter since I was much, much, much more fucking closer to this short man than I really should’ve been.

I was literally the one going on and on in my head about how the space between Isiah and I was oh so goddamn necessary, and yet here I fucking was, doing some fucking insane shit like this. Brining myself closer to him yet again.

“A-And the peeler,” I continued with that indisputable unevenness in my soft tone. “It’s going to peel it regardless. Y-You can move slower… more deliberately .”

I should’ve been internally screaming to myself to let go of Isiah’s hands. To put space between us yet the fuck again…

Yet instead, all I could find the internal voice to scream was keep your fucking hands steady .

I didn’t want Isiah to feel how badly they threatened to shake right now. How they wished for nothing more than to mirror my rapidly increasing heart rate.

Being this close to him… he was everywhere yet again, his scent wrapping around me like a goddamn blanket. It was from this position behind him where I got the strongest whiff of that new scent that had been occupying far too much space in my fucking mind all day.

“D-Dy-…” I hear Isiah start once more, but he cut himself off entirely when I felt myself bending down slightly, drawing my nose closer to his hair- the spot just above his ear where his shaved sides with the slits in them were.

I… I hadn’t meant to get this close… but that scent was inescapable . Everything that was new with Isiahwas.

“D-Dylan- w-what are-”

“You… changed your shampoo,” I all but fucking murmured with my eyes long since drifting closed as I took in more of this scent. I had finally figured out what was different about him, and as I brought my nose even closer, I had felt it. A deep shudder cutting through every single inch of Isiah right down to his hands as they trembled in mine.

“I-I-I-… y-yeah, yeah I… I did.” His voice sounded  much different now. Coarser . And I… well I had long since abandoned any thought of fucking reason damn near forever ago, that whatever voices in my head once screaming at me to control myself, just didn’t exist anymore. “They um… they discontinued my usual one.”

“Nolden’s brand Sandalwood.” I whispered gently with my eyes still closed, naming his usual scent as I took in the scent that I didn’t recognize. “This one- it’s more… eucalyptus.”

“Do you not… do you not like-”

“ I love it. “ I muttered without thinking at all, hearing Isiah inhale sharply as I started to run my nose slightly lower, barely touching that skin while I drew nearer to the spot behind his ears where he would spray his cologne onto his wrists then rub it in there.

This mixed so fucking well, and all of it was so goddamn intoxicating, I barely noticed when Isiah started to lean back against me a bit more, his shoulders gently melting into my chest. And there was something that… that stirred with my body yet again. A reaction I had never had with anyone else that made me grow far more heated than I expected. I had lost myself so goddamn completely in whatever it was my body was fully choosing to do of its own accord, I didn’t realize just how… how far I was taking things…

Until I heard the clambering of the potato and the peeler against the wooden cutting board.

Both had slipped from Isiah’s hands- hands I had tightened my hold on at some point- and the mere sound finally snapped myself out of whatever the complete fuck I was doing just now.

I pulled away from Isiah swiftly, letting go of his hands before putting the most distance between him and I that I possibly could as I mumbled some random words of encouragement and returned to the stove

What… what the actual fucking fuck, Dylan? I couldn’t help but think just then, however my brain still hadn’t quite recovered from that… whatever that just was… and so the voice attempting to reason with me as it circulated my mind just sounded like straight gibberish, mixing in with the mush that was now my brain.

••

16. Tend To Your Wounds, pt. 1

4600 words my lovelies!

Edited chapters will be up on Substack soon :)

Also, should I make a playlist for these two lovebirds? Honestly I feel like it would go so hard haha lemme know!

Anyhooo, enjoy!

xoxo

Isiah

What the actual complete fucking hell…

That was-

That was literally the only thought I could possibly think to myself as I finished peeling these potatoes to grate, and Dylan worked on cooking the mashed potatoes while washing all the vegetables.

He had switched a bit of music on to try and fill the immediate awkwardness that followed after he had- after he had just-

My body was on literal fire, with my hands barely managing to keep themselves stable enough so I didn’t skin myself during this even more tedious process. My jeans were… well they were beyond the realms of uncomfortable, let’s just say that, and I was doing everything in my power to conceal the now massive bulge pressing against my zipper from Dylan.

The only thing replaying again and again and again as I begged my aching body to concentrate, was the events of the last five or so minutes… after my frustrations with that peeler got the best of me…

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Dylan asked almost immediately as he joined me at my side.

“Yeah, sorry, no I’m fine. Just frustrated.” I replied. I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I had peeled a potato, let alone peeled one with a peeler. “I’ve honestly never been the best with a peeler. I usually just use a knife.”

Dylan paused for a moment, before some light, unexpected laughter slipped past his lips, forcing heat to myself almost immediately in slight embarrassment.

“That’s because you’re peeling them weird with it. Here,” he reached out his left hand before gently removing the potato from my right. “Hold it like this,” he then instructed me, showing me where each finger should go. I ended up passing over the peeler too, simply allowing him to teach me otherwise he and I would be still working away at this meal well into the New Year. “You want to pull it towards you.”

I watched was he pressed the bled firmly to the peel and dragged it towards him, instead of mindlessly slicing in the opposite direction, giving him far more control.

“Ah shit. Yeah that makes way more sense.” I all but muttered, continuing to study his actions.

“Well I mean you could strike it like you’re passing out stacks of 1’s at a strip club but we might have Boxty with a side of your finger tips if you’re not careful,” he replied, and that reply was so unexpected that I couldn’t help but fucking laugh.

He was spot on with that analogy.

“Sounds delicious,” I found myself replying, teasing him as I shot him one solid grin.

“Doesn’t it?” He asked, meeting my grin with one of his own as he continued peeling away like it was nothing, before eventually setting the now perfectly peeled golden thing back in the bowl I had set my first peeled potato in. Then he reached across the counter easily to hand me another unpeeled one from the freshly washed supply. “Now you.” He insisted, handing me the peeler as well.

I had done my best to replicate what Dylan had done, but truth be told, this one was shaped even more awkwardly, making it hard to hold correctly. Had I known what he was to do next however, I surely would have tried way more fucking harder to get it right.

“L-Like this, goofy ,” he spoke with that deep voice of his as I saw him shift a bit closer to me, invading what little space there already was between us before he wrapped his left arm around me, settling only partially behind me.

I felt my whole body fucking freeze as I felt him slide his left hand under my own to reposition my hand.

“D-Dyl-” I all but fucking croaked out as my heart reminded me of the fact that she was still somehow alive and kicking with how disastrous a rhythm she quickly fell into.

He… he was too close.

He was way too fucking close right now.

“Y-You’ve… you’ve got to tuck your fingers back.” His fingers were gently against mine, but all that did was send my heart rate spiraling further. “Even carving down can still knick your pinky if you’re not careful.”

That… that fucking deep voice of his- fuck.

He was beyond too fucking close right now, and the way my nerves were reacting to just the simple touch of his fingers repositioning my own was making me start to lose it.

Sh-Shit- I needed him to back the fuck up. I needed to get the fuck out of this somehow. My body was fucking begging for this to continue, but my mind was the voice of reason here, and it was telling me that I lacked all resolve if Dylan got any closer.

That I-

I felt him shift again, bringing more of him closer that I could feel the warmth of his body. I could now hear the deeper breathes he was taking, sending slight chills through me as I tried to keep my hands steady.

If he continued… I was absolutely going to take some skin off my fingers.

“A-And the peeler,” he added with that slight unevenness in his soft yet deep tone. “It’s going to peel it regardless. Y-You can move slower… more deliberately .”

Shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit-

His hands were perfectly steady, while I was forced to lock my elbows in at my side in hopes I could use my body to keep them from jolting with every breath he took do daringly close to me.

Fuck. He smelt so goddamn good, I felt my eyelids growing heavier just at his scent alone, let along his touch.

His voice.

“D-Dy-…” I more or less attempted yet again, trying to decide how to tell him this was too much without revealing how much he was affecting the complete shit out of me right now, but I didn’t even make it that far. My pleas were cut short once I felt Dylan draw even nearer, bending down slightly before he brought his face closer to the right side of my face and hair- right near where my shaved fade started.

His warm breaths… they were… they were starting to-

“D-Dylan-” I attempted desperately yet again. “W-What are-”

“You… changed your shampoo,” he murmured against me, and I almost fucking whimpered in response to it. My knees were started to grow weaker, and I lost the battle to my heavier eyelids as they drifted closed.

This was too fucking much.

I had finally fought against this feeling to try and step further away from Dylan, out of his trapped embrace, but then I felt his nose gently nudge against the soft skin behind my ear, and my erratic heartbeat brought with it whole ass palpitations. The deepest of shivers cutting through every single inch of my goddamn body, right down to my hands that could no longer keep themselves steady in his.

I had more than fucking lost myself, unable to step away anymore once I felt that heat quickly spreading itself, travel, finding its way right down to my stiffening dick.

“I-I-I-… y-yeah, yeah I… I did.” My voice was a goddamn mess. I mean I barely even recognized I had said words, as I explained why my shampoo was different. The fact that he even recognized it was making me dizzy, yet I couldn’t find it in me to pull my hands away from his so I could stabilize myself on the counter in front of us.

Words, Isiah. Say fucking something, I tried to force myself.

“They um… they… discontinued my usual one.”

He knew what my fucking shampoo smelt like.

That was the singular thought now running through my mind.

He knew.

“Nolden’s brand Sandalwood.” He whispered gently with my eyes still closed, naming my usual shampoo brand and scent as he inhaled deeply… making my own breaths simply seize to fucking exist. “This one- it’s more… eucalyptus.”

I knew I needed to find an excuse- any excuse to put more space between us now as more shivers ran up and down my entire being, but there was only one thought I decided to voice, which was about as helpful as a blind referee.

“Do you not… do you not like-”

“ I love it. “ He muttered quietly, forcing myself to take the sharpest inhale as I tried to force air back into my lungs now while Dylan ran the tip of his nose slightly lower.

Think of something, Isiah. Fucking anything, goddamn it!

That was what my mind was screaming at me… yet my body was so freaking weak to this taller man, I had started to lean back into it- his warmth. His heavy breaths. That deep voice that was starting to make everything else completely hazy as my shoulders molded into his chest. My cock was starting to pulsate from how desperately I wanted him to touch me right now. How desperately I wanted to put off dinner for a moment, turn around, and bring my lips to his.

I had grown so fucking lost in this feeling of him behind me, I hadn’t noticed my grip on everything I was holding had loosened to nothing.

And the loud noise that came from me dropping literally everything- the potato, the peeler, everything, was what seemed to finally pull Dylan out of whatever the fuck he had just started doing.

It was at that moment when I realized that Dylan’s hands had tightened around me at some point, not the objects in my hand. He had been hold me, not them.

When I felt him suddenly release them, I knew that what would follow would leave us both speechless for a long fucking while…

And I had been right.

Silence quickly filled the kitchen, with neither of us unable to explain away, nor ignore what had just happened.

Luckily my back was to Dylan while I worked at the kitchen island, and he continued near the stove at the sink, but nothing- absolutely nothing could’ve prepared me for what he’d done. He had all but nuzzled his head into me, and the way he had just known I smelled… different-

Jesus fucking Christ.

I had wished for more simple, cute, sweet and tender moments between he and I this afternoon and evening. Moments that could’ve just perhaps, by chance shown him more could potentially grow between us if he wanted it to. That I could- that I oh so fucking desperately wanted those moments to grow…

But… that?

That had almost had me wanted to reach behind myself and feel him. To quench my curiosity and see if he was… if he had been… affected the way I had been. If his body had… reacted the way mine had from his touch. If that part of him was as hard as I was right now.

Those thoughts and urges were not thoughts that I had meant to have- at least not here, in his home. Not while I was still with him, and while we still had a solid two hours left before his dads got home.

I did everything in my fucking power not to let those thoughts dwell, but the feeling of his soft breaths against my exposed skin, and that deep, fucking mesmerizing voice as he spoke so freely to my clammy mess… I couldn’t escape the way I could still feel him even now, when it felt like we had a whole ocean between us.

His touch had lingered everywhere… from my hands… to my hair, and neck. Even his firm, broad chest when I found myself melting into it.

I wanted him. Right then and there, I was more than willing to fucking beg for him- for his lips to touch mine, even if it was for a moment. For his hands to slowly drag up my hands to my exposed arms…

I had told myself that I had wanted him in any capacity… but right then and there, in that moment, I wanted his touch fucking everywhere…

Dylan managed to get the potatoes mashed for me after cleaning the produce, while I started to make the Boxty with everything he prepped and laid out for me already. I had witnessed Don make these more than a handful of times, yet it was Dylan who memorized the measurements perfectly.

We attempted some light conversation here and there, but I knew that after whatever the hell that was that happened, it was going to take some real work to pull Dylan out of his own head and me out of mine, a place we’d both since retreated to right after, letting me know that what he had done had surprised even himself.

I didn’t even know how to assure him without calling more attention to it, so I just took whatever small bits of conversation he attempted to maintain some normality, and ran with it, hiding every bit of how fucking utterly turned on that had made me.

Jesus, I almost fucking moaned when I felt those breaths of his on my exposed skin. I had fully forgotten what it was I was trying to do around him.

Act normal. Act uninterested.

And it didn’t take long before I was ready to fry up the Boxty while Dylan got the steaks ready for frying himself. This meant that at long last, he and I were forced to stand next to one another over the stove, reducing the space we had kept between us after that by a whole fucking lot.

“Those… Those look incredible,” I commented hesitantly, turning to Dylan with a slight smile as I tilted my head up slightly to meet his gaze.

That comment alone made the man’s face about as red as a goddamn heirloom tomato.

Great , I then thought to myself. I still hadn’t quite figured it out. How to approach him. But when Dylan’s gaze cast itself to the plate of ready to fry Boxty, his nervous smile widened. “Y-You did one amazing job yourself.”

And that just about brought the heat of a thousand suns to my own face. It was a breakthrough of the sorts as we both turned our burners on.

I immediately became preoccupied with watching Dylan, however as he continued his movements. Watching how he waited for the skillet to heat before carefully laying a patted down steak into the hot oil. The aromas from the cooking meat quickly filled the kitchen which made my stomach growl with intense hunger as I forced myself to pay somewhat attention to my own tasks.

Dylan was just so… skilled . He treated that first steak with such care, making sure to use a meat thermometer to ensure a perfectly cooked inside… yet trouble came for me as I watched him finally remove the perfectly seared meat from the pan for resting.

I hadn’t noticed how hot the oil had been in my own pot, and when I accidentally dropped the second to last Boxty inside it, a great deal of scorching hot oil splashed up onto my fucking hand.

“Shit!” I let out rather abruptly as that burning pain was fucking immediate against my skin.

“Isiah!” Dylan turned quickly to me, shutting off his own front right burner and mine before reaching for the hand I had rushed to bring to my chest. “Are you okay?”

“I- yeah, I’m-… shit! “ I hissed again at the pain as I tried to pulled my hand further away from him.

I didn’t mean to freak him out, especially because it was my own mindless fucking stupidity that got me burned, but I could only shut my mouth when Dylan pulled my hand away from my chest firmly by my wrist with his strong one, pulling both it and me closer to him quickly so he could assess the damage.

The handsome man then pulled my hand over to the sink by my arm, practically dragging me along with it before he ran the faucet’s cold water and placed the burnt skin underneath.

“D-Dylan, it’s not- I’m fine-”

“Shut up, Isiah,” he snapped back quickly. “Keep it under that faucet, I’m going to grab the first aid.” And though I tried to call out a few more jumbled words to ensure this now very worried, handsome man that I would be fine, I could already see what he saw. The slight red rawness of my skin as the cool water washed over it.

And the man was already moving at the speed of light before he disappeared down the hall…

So, well, I sort of had no choice but to listen to him.

The coolness of the water did alleviate that immediate pain, yet I spent the maybe ten minutes I was there for standing at the sink, just chastising myself. I had fucked up so royally all because I wasn’t paying attention, and now dinner was put on hold and Dylan was in full dad mode because of it.

There was absolutely nothing I could’ve said to stop that, nor clear that worried look from his eyes as he returned with a first aid kit and a small towel.

“Place this gently on your hand to pat down the water and follow me,” he directed me seriously in that deep voice as he turned off the faucet and handed me the fresh towel. I decided that I’d just have to take the path of least resistance because at this point, Dylan wasn’t going to turn this part of him off anytime soon.

And so I followed him, watching his back as he led us into the living room with a first aid kit in hand to plop right down on the plush carpet near the left edge of the coffee table.

He and I sat directly in front of each other, crossing our legs with our knees damn near almost touching, and once Dylan stretched out his left hand for my right one, I slowly straightened my arm to place it in his hand.

The oil had burned a bit of the top part of it, and while it didn’t look horrendous or anything, the skin was definitely more than just irritated.

Dylan’s features seemed hard, almost angry really… yet his hands were the most gentle I think I had ever seen them be as he carefully rested my hand palm down on his left thigh, the soft material of his slacks feeling nice against my calloused skin. “Dylan, I’m so sorry-”

“Don’t apologize,” Dylan’s deep, now even more uneven voice replied. “Please… please don’t apologize. T-That was… it was my fuck up.”

His tight words only left me more confused. “What are you talking about?” I asked him a little more softly now. “I one thousand percent just accidentally dropped the Boxty-”

“No, I…” Dylan cut in yet again, and though I could see such blatant conflicting emotions meddled into his hardened features, his long fingers used that towel to gently dry my hand the rest of the way, before he started rummaging through the first aid bag.

I simply waiting patiently for him to collect his thoughts since mine were left with nothing but confusion.

“The- the oil. I poured too much in the pot. I… I hadn’t notice until-… I-I had… I had been distracted earlier and-”

“Hey. Hey hey hey, woah there,” I heard my voice get considerably more gentle immediately at Dylan’s more unnatural state.

He wasn’t mad at me, I thought quickly to myself. He was mad at himself.

“It’s fine Dylan-”

“I-It’s- It’s not, I should’ve-”

“ Dylan ,“ I cut himself off again as my hand firmly squeezed his upper thing through his slacks. “It. Is. Fine . I will not need open heart surgery for a little grease burn, got that?” My words were still gentle, but a whole lot firmer now. The way he had started to chew himself up like that honestly made my heart feel like it wanted to cave in on itself.

And though it took a few seconds, Dylan finally nodded, allowing me to loosen the grip I had on that upper thigh.

He had seemed to not long after, find what he was looking for in that bag. It was a tube of what I was assuming was some sort of antibiotic ointment. He squirted a good amount onto the tips of his fingers before he ever so, and I mean ever so gently spread it around the raw area of the skin.

Genuinely, this was the most tender this man had been with anything as far as I was concerned. And he looked so focused on his care too, causing me to release a deep sigh from the cooling feeling or the ointment. Getting burned had been seriously fucking painful, yet now, I had almost forgot about that pain in its entirety once that cooling effect settled in.

All I could do was watch as this beautiful man with those tantalizing light eyes finished carefully applying the ointment before he reached back inside that kit for some gauze and bandaging. And with the soft jazz playing in the background still from the Bluetooth speaker near the fridge, I couldn’t help but grow more and more enthralled by Dylan’s precision.

It had never dawned on me before… but right at that moment, I truly believed that Dylan would’ve made for one amazing doctor or nurse. In addition to how he was the farthest from squeamish about blood, he was just so… so kind. So gentle, and caring.

I watched on with even more unintentional intently as he placed the gauze down where the burn was, then started wrapping my hand with the bandage, making sure he was careful not to wrap too tight.

“Does this feel okay?” He asked as he looked up at me for the first time in ages. He had been so concentrated with his work on me, and I was more than fine with that. I could tell he was placing a lot of importance on his care, and that was making my body feel like I had dove head first into that pot of oil.

“Y-Yes,” I nodded quickly. “It’s seriously perfect.” And that seemed to help with Dylan’s rather intense self loathing for what had happened. Something I didn’t blame him for in the slightest.

… But then this handsome man did something rather unexpected which pulled even more of my attention.

He bent down, bringing my now meticulously wrapped hand up to his lips before he gently kissed the back of both it and the wrap.

And my beating heart practically took a nose dive into hell at that point.

It rendered me completely fucking speechless when he pulled away and rested my hand back on his upper thigh with his. I didn’t even know where to look anymore: at the softest fucking lips I was so desperate to feel again as I watched them touch my injury, or at the bandaged hand he had just planted them on.

“I’m… I’m sorry I freaked out. I just- I… I don’t like seeing you hurt.” Dylan tried to explain. “My mum always said a kiss on an injury helps it heal faster, and I know you said don’t apologize, but I’m sor-”

Before he could finish that sentence, my hand tightened on his quickly and I raised it towards me, turning it as I brought it to my own lips to gently kiss the back of his hand. The way his breathing hitched, and the sharpest fucking inhale he took was not lost on my ears. In fact, I only felt my heart beat quicken to damn near unimaginable beats as my lips lingered there on his soft skin for just a fraction of a second before I returned both our hands to his upper thigh.

And when my eyes slowly raised to his, deciding I’d probably need to explain my own sudden actions… I was welcomed with the most beautiful sight.

That redness scattering across his face with speeds I could barely track, yet his light, mesmerizing eyes weren’t on my hazel-green ones any longer. They were focused on something slightly lower. On a part of me that I wanted nothing more than for his lips to touch.

My tongue moved to moisten the chappedness of them- my own lips. And Dylan followed that simple action with his heated gaze, with his own lips just barely parted.

“W-Wha… what… what was that for?” I heard his now raspier, deeper voice croak out quietly. A fair, honest ask, I had to admit.

“You’re beating yourself up inside,” I tried to explain. “I’m just kissing the part I can so your self-inflicted injuries heal a little quicker.” My voice took on the same quiet tone his had.

It was the look Dylan gave me, however, that made all thoughts simply vanish within my mind. His eyes… they alternated slowly between my own, and my lips. I could see he wanted to say something, yet it felt like the way he was looking at me, with such an immense amount of adoration, I knew there was nothing that really needed to be said if he didn’t find the words.

At this exact moment, when my own gaze alternated between his light eyes and his soft lips, I believed that whatever this was between us was, well… it was felt .

Something had… shifted.

Dylan had never looked at me like this before, that I was at the very least certain of.

“I-Isiah?” He whispered almost inaudibly, luring my gaze from his lips to his eyes once more.

“Ye-… Yes?” I whispered back unevenly, unsure of what the hell would come next after this…

Unfortunately, however, it would seem that the universe didn’t deem me worthy enough to know, because the abrupt sound of the timer going off at the stove had seemingly managed to pull us both out of this- whatever this was, or was perhaps going to be.

I felt Dylan hesitantly loosen his hand in my wrapped one, forcing me to pull away so he could eventually stand, and we could return to what it was we were working on in the kitchen, tucking this moment away like perhaps it didn’t exist at all, but as soon as I started to follow Dylan, he abruptly stopped, almost causing me to walk right into his back.

“W-Wha-”

“Sit,” Dylan practically ordered as he pointed to one of the bar stools at the kitchen island.

“Dylan, I can stil-”

“ Sit .“

Now that was absolutely a direct order, which had my feet moving before more protests could fall past my lips as I approached a barstool at the other side of kitchen island.

“Tonight, you’ll rest that hand while getting a front row seat at the Great Dylan Holland and all his wonders. Do you accept my proposition, fine sir?” He asked me with a growing grin that practically cemented my ass to this stool.

“I do not believe I can think of any better a way to spend said evening, Mr. Holland.” I replied, allowing this man to mask his worry and tender care for me with his playful spirit.

This would be the first time he had ever cooked for me while I simply got to watch.

And now I didn’t need an excuse to force myself to look away from him.

••

17. Secrets

Another long chap! 4500 words. I’ll be editing and getting Substack updated by the weekend, I just had a really busy week. Also I’m working on a playlist rn for this! :)

Enjoy!

xoxo

Dylan

I could feel his eyes on me, watching intently.

“You’ve gotten faster,” Isiah noted from across the kitchen table as I finished up chopping the array of vegetables for the stir fry.

“Yeah,” I chuckled a bit nervously, trying to focus on not chopping my damn fingers off in the process. “Yeah, I guess I have. I got to use some pretty gnarly knives in Ireland, and good ol Pops worked with me on getting better. Crazy to think it all started with that plastic set he bought me forever ago.”

I traveled back with those memories, thinking about how I wasn’t able to use a sharp knife until I was fifteen. And still, to this day, my dad didn’t let me touch the professional set that were in a metal case below this kitchen island.

I thought it was preposterous considering I was now I full adult, having turned 18 shortly before we left Ireland. Isiah’s birthday was at the beginning of May, and though we weren’t talking at the time, I still sent him a happy birthday message.

It… it stung… bad, honestly , when I didn’t get a response from him… but now that was all water under the bridge. I didn’t care what had happened between us, all that mattered was that we were friends again.

Thinking about his birthday suddenly made me remember something as my hand holding the knife froze for a second…

I had still bought him a gift.

“What did you do for your birthday?” I asked Isiah rather suddenly as my hands moved again, setting the knife down and placing the chopped vegetables into a glass bowl to transfer to the pan that was heating over the stove with oil. The steaks were resting now on the counter behind us, so all that was left was the stir fry then dinner would be ready.

Isiah took a second before he answered my random question. “Not a whole lot, really. My mum baked me a cake, and we all sort of spent the day together after school. I knew my mum was a bit low on cash because she had to pay in on taxes this year in April, so we kept it small,” Isiah explained with those hazel-green eyes still watch me. “She bought me a new PlayStation controller a month later.”

I found myself nodding at his response before I picked up the filled bowl and brought it over to the stove, making sure to season the veggies well right after I plopped them all into the large heated pan.

“What about yourself?” Isiah questioned, though his voice sounded closer than I expected, and as I looked back, he was already off the barstool and headed towards me.

“I thought I told you to-”

“I wanna see,” he interrupted me as he soon joined me at my side. The aroma from the vegetable medley was heavenly with the scent of the cooked meat and fried Boxty, making my stomach rumble. And after deciding that it wouldn’t hurt if Isiah simply watched, I gave up on pushing the guy out.

“Fine. And we went out for dinner as a family while in Ireland. I didn’t ask for anything this year since my Pops promised I’d get a car when we got back. That, and my dad had already dished out a lot for the trip itself. It didn’t feel right to ask for more, ya know?”

Isiah nodded immediately, watching as I mixed the veggies within the pan, getting a good sear before turning the heat down some.

“I um… I… I also, like, got you something. Like for your birthday.” I found myself admitting as I turned to Isiah. His eyebrows raised quickly at that.

“Really?” He then asked me with even more of a surprised tone. “You- you really didn’t have to-”

“Of course I did,” I cut in. “Especially since I was in Ireland. And it’s absolutely okay if you didn’t get me something… you didn’t even know when I was getting back so it’s okay.” That part was practically rushed out at soon as I saw some guilt settling into his handsome features. “It’s just something small really. I’ll go get it once we’re done cooking.”

He nodded slowly, still clearly taken aback by what I admitted, but I didn’t want to make it bigger than it really was.

I didn’t want Isiah to feel like he owed me anything in return.

“Why don’t we go catch a movie sometime to celebrate your birthday. Your choice of film, my treat.” He offered, and though I wanted to immediately decline… I decided against it. I could see saying yes would make him feel better, so I nodded quickly, accepting his proposal. “Perfect, let’s go after dinner the coming Friday. We can walk to The Showroom from my place.”

That part made me smile immediately. It would be like old times , I thought to myself as I continued finishing off dinner with Isiah persistently back at my side.

By the time the stir fry was done, Isiah and I decided we would just go ahead and eat. We were clearly both starving, and the time was well past seven in the evening at this point. My dad and Carson would be home soon but I didn’t really want to wait for them.

I ended up plating both our dinner while Isiah set the table, placing the placemats on the glass and filling up two glasses with some water to set down while I brought the food to the dining area. He even lit the center mantle that held some candles inside adding a warm glow to the darkening home as outside morphed into night… and against all better fucking judgement, I went ahead and poured us each a glass of wine from the bottle I had opened.

The look on Isiah’s face said it all as I placed both filled glasses onto the placemats next to the plates of food. “It’s fine,” I assured him with a smile, watching as he took a seat at one side of the table, and I took mine right across from him.

My plan was to just tell my father that the marinade called for more wine than I thought, and hopefully that would be enough to convince him that I hadn’t helped myself to his collection.

Hopefully he’d be so damn tired that he wouldn’t notice at all… but only time could truly tell.

Isiah didn’t waste a single moment digging in, but I waited patiently for his first bite, watching that massive smile soon grace his lips as he chewed the perfectly done steak. And the deep groan he released brought a smile to my own lips immediately before I started digging in myself.

I had cut one of the massive steaks in half for us to share, which made me well aware that the tender inside was cooked literally perfectly. Once that first bite hit my own tastebuds, I moaned deeply myself, almost ready to shed a tear or two.

Next was the Boxty, and after biting into the crispy deliciousness, I did feel my eyes start to tear up slightly. “ Fuck , Isiah, you absolutely nailed it,“ I murmured blissfully as I looked up at him. I noticed his face had grown far more flushed while his chewing slowed, but the smile he gave me assured me he appreciated the compliment.

“I believe all praises must be directed at my Head Chef, sir. I’m sure he’s around here somewhere if you would like to pass on the compliment.”

That made my smile only grow as I quickly reached for the glass of wine, wanting to give myself something to do besides talk because I knew my response would be a blubbering mess if I gave him one.

Isiah took a sip from his own glass as he nodded again in approval. The wine was a perfect blend with the meat since its notes were already infused in the marinade. It made me hum an agreed approval, watching Isiah closely as he continued eating with that gorgeous smile on his face.

One that seemed to reach his beautiful eyes.

And with this dim candlelit lighting… they genuinely looked all the more alluring, forcing my attention back to him at every moment.

Isiah and I finished dinner quickly because of how hungry we were. He and I ended up going back for seconds of the stir fry and the Boxty, but had to control ourselves so there would be enough for my dad and Carson once they got home.

After we had somewhat had our fill, we ended up brining our almost done wine glasses into the living room. I had to admit, this wine was already starting to give me more of a buzz than I expected, and perhaps that was why I ended up grabbing the bottle from the kitchen too, which Isiah’s eyebrows raised slightly at, yet he didn’t give me any protests as we sat down on the coach and cleared space on the coffee table he had pulled closer for us to set our glasses on.

“Should we watch something?” I asked, turning to my left where Isiah was sitting. Clearly neither of us wanted to return to school work, so I thought this might be a better alternative.

“Sure,” he nodded. “Why don’t you throw on The Rise of Skywalker? I’ve got a good buzz going, and I think I’m in the mood to hate-watch something.”

I gave Isiah a look, chuckling as I replied “just don’t throw anything at the TV when we get to the ‘somehow Palpatine returned’ line. Promise you’ll show some restraint.”

Isiah raised up his right, wrapped hand to swear an oath. “You have my word. Besides, I’ve been practicing a new stream of curse words that I would like to try out just for that moment.”

That only made me laugh harder as more warmth spread through my whole fucking body from the wine. “I don’t think anything will beat our rewatch of Season Eight of Game of Thrones,” I reminded him.

“Hey, we’ll soon be old enough to make it a drinking game. Take a shot every time Jon Snow says ‘she is my queen’ or ‘I don’t want it.’ See which one of us is left alive after.” He offered, pulling from me yet another hearty laugh.

“I mean, if death is what we’re going for then sure. I wouldn’t mind tackling hell with you. Sounds like a new adventure.” I replied as I reached for the remote on the seat of the couch to my right to find the Star Wars movie.

“And what makes you think we won’t see the pearly white gates?” Isiah asked me, but when I turned to him again at the end of the couch, we both full on cackled.

“I’d say it was probably the thumb tacks you put on Mr. Salvines chair in the seventh grade, or the fire alarm I pulled our freshman year to get us out of an English test you and I both didn’t read the book for.” Isiah offered up, making me quickly nod in agreement.

We sure did have some explaining to do if we ever caught even a glimpse of the pearly white gates.

Isiah reached forward to pour us more wine from the bottle while I successfully found the film, however it looked like there was now a price tag attached to it. I debated paying the price and just reimbursing my dad once he inevitably received that phone bill, but that remote was snatched out of my hand so goddamn quick, I could barely process what was happening.

“If you think we’re dishing out $24.99 for this hot piece of certified garbagé , you’re insane. I’ll cast it from my phone.” Isiah told me sternly, making this damn near permanent smile on my face only grow even larger.

“You have this bullshit downloaded on your phone?”

“ Fuck no. We’re pirating this shit.“ He replied, already casting his phone to the TV, and not a moment later, I saw the title credits start to play in almost perfect quality. He had even thrown on subtitles to really aid in our hate-watching experience.

I turned to Isiah fully for this next line with nothing but pure admiration in my eyes as I said “you, sir, have got to be the best pirate I’ve ever seen, Mr. Jacobs.”

And the goofy grin Isiah gave me as he replied, quoting Pirates of the Caribbean with “ so it would seem, Mr. Holland,“ put me on cloud fucking nine.

Shit , I had missed this.

Him .

There was nothing I loved more than when Isiah stood on business with not supporting a single thing Disney had come out with over the last eight or so years. If they had no haters, his soul had long since passed on… yet I truly believed that he would find a way to continue to hate from beyond the grave.

I found myself reaching for my wine glass before Isiah and I both pulled our feet up onto the couch. I was sitting in the middle while he sat on the far end to the left of me, but my body was fully turned in his direction while I leant against the back cushions.

This man and I hated every fucking part of this film from start to finish, which pained us some because we both really liked The Force Awakens. Sure it was practically just A New Hope in slightly different font, but we adored the concept of Finn, a Stormtrooper turned good, and honestly the way this series just shat all over his character as the movies progressed rightfully pissed us both off to no end.

We had both gotten into it with Molly a few years back because she proclaimed her love for Rey and called us sexist for absolutely despising her, but knowing what I knew now about Molly’s sexuality, I had reason to believe that gal just thought she was hot.

That was truly the only explanation I could think of because Rey was objectively poorly written.

Isiah defended our claims passionately, explaining that a powerful female lead was only as compelling as her hero arc, and Rey wasn’t flushed out nearly enough during hers. He related it to the story of Mulan, which I loved him for because that story did it perfectly. Mulan earned her place in that army while facing many challenges that were earnest and true to the nature of the story itself.

To this day, I still believed that was peak Disney.

We’d never get a song like I’ll Make A Man Out Of You again, that I was sure of.

“Do you think the demon rat will conjure up another shit project to further tank the legacy of Star Wars next year?” I asked, turning to Isiah whose eyes quickly met mine as he looked my way. I took another sip of my wine, and Isiah did the same.

“I’m hoping that fucking company goes bankrupt before then. The only place that rat belongs is in a New York sewer.”

“He won’t last a day there,” I argued, laughing fully at Isiah’s comment.

“Good. I’m banking on it.” He muttered with a grin as he moved his wine glass to his left hand and rested his right arm against the back edge of the couch.

Every time I got a glimpse of his wrapped hand, I still felt a hard pang of guilt hit me. I had tried to talk myself down from all my worry while in the bathroom looking for the first aid… but I still felt like shit for having not paid enough attention when I first poured the oil.

I had… been distracted. And I couldn’t, under any circumstances, tell Isiah why I had been distracted.

I couldn’t admit to him, nor even myself really, how I hadn’t been able to keep my eyes off of him. I already knew how it sounded in my head, so there was no way I was saying it aloud.

My brain was also getting a bit more fuzzy from the wine, making me even more worried that if I were to say anything at all, it wouldn’t come out right.

Isiah had turned back to the screen to let off a stream of profanities at a certain scene in the movie, but I hadn’t looked away from him yet. I wasn’t quite ready to return to the film just yet… I wanted to keep talking.

“Did you have a movie you wanted to see on Friday?” I asked, and Isiah quickly returned his attention to me, making that warmth spread through me yet again.

“There isn’t much out besides horror movies since October is just around the corner… and you know I’m not all that crazy about horror, but I know you like em so I’m down to be scared a bit.” He replied.

“Well if you get too scared, I’ll let you hold my hand like you used to.”

I glanced back at his wrapped hand on the couch rest. Was it bad that I wanted to hold his hand now, I thought quietly to myself. I couldn’t stop thinking about how he had kissed the back of mine. How soft his lips were against my skin…

And so I found myself passing my wine glass to my right hand so I could stretch my left arm over the back ledge of the couch like he had, feeling the soft suede beige material beneath my fingers. Our hands were now just about an inch or so apart… and it… well, it would take nothing to-

“Usually I’d make you swear that you won’t tease me afterward, but since it’s your belated birthday celebration, I’ll allow you to surprise scare me a total of three times after the movie. But that’s all you’re getting.” His voice was stern, yet that grin on his face brought some immediate heat to my own as I gave him a firm nod.

I could work with three.

I loved how cute Isiah was when he got scared during a horror movie. He used to pull the covers up to his face whenever we watched movies we definitely had no business watching together when we were younger at his place.

Now that we were older, however, Isiah would just divert his gaze from the scary scene until it was completely over.

I watched as those hazel-green eyes left me to return to the TV screen, but something inside me didn’t want his attention elsewhere. I… I liked it when his eyes were on me.

Only me.

And when his head snapped back quickly from the screen to me… then to his hand on the couch… the hand my arm had further extended itself to so I could gently touch the wrap with my fingers, I saw more redness creep its way across his face. “Dylan?” He whispered quietly.

“S-Sorry,” I stammered as I moved to remove my fingers from him, but Isiah reached for my hand quickly, stopping me from pulling it away.

“I-It’s fine,” he assured me with a slightly hesitant smile.

“Does it still hurt?” I asked him. “Tell me the truth. I don’t want you to still be in pain.”

Isiah swiftly shook his head no. “You kissed it and made it all better, remember?” He asked me. I could feel my heart now, awakening herself from his words alone.

Kissed , I thought to myself as this wine really settled itself. I’d need to slow down soon, otherwise I was scared of what I might say aloud.

“Isiah?” I found myself eventually whispering quietly. Neither of us had turned back to the TV while Isiah still held my hand in his.

“Yes?” He whispered back with that gentle voice of his.

“We… we tell each other everything … right? All of our secrets?”

Isiah nodded slowly, though his eyebrows furrowed at the odd question.

“What if… what if I had a secret that I… well, that I wanted to say… but I didn’t want anything to change- well, I mean like, I didn’t want to make things bad between us again… would you still want me to share that secret?”

Isiah simply looked at me for a good, long moment, studying me rather intently with still a great deal of confusion etched into his bolder features. I wasn’t even sure if I was making much sense anymore due to the wine, but I was praying to the fucking lord that I was.

“…Yeah,” he eventually nodded after much consideration on his part. “Yeah… I think I’d still like to know. I mean, you and I got over this last year of a mess, I don’t think there’s anything you can say that would bring us back there again… rather, I won’t allow us to ever get like that again.”

That part made me smile, but I was still a little uneasy about it. No amount of liquid courage could help with that, even though I took another sip of wine first before trying to get these thoughts out.

“Do you have a secret you could share with me first? I… I’m just really… well, I’m scared I guess.”

Isiah still studied me for another moment, seemingly thinking to himself. And I suspected to eventually watch him shake his head no, but his next words surprised me.

“Okay,” he nodded slowly again. “I… I do have a secret, but… well, I don’t want it to change anything either- I mean like, I’m only revealing it so you know that some things still… affect me. And maybe it would be good if we sort of, like, refrained from certain things so I can try to be more normal.”

It was now my turn to furrow my eyebrows in confusion, yet I felt a shiver jet up my left arm when I felt Isiah’s thumb gently brush over the joints of my fingers that were still in his. It just made my already thumping heart really shoot for extra credit with her BPM.

“On the bleachers… on Wednesday… I… well, I told you that I-… that I, um….” Isiah trailed off for a moment, and his gaze finally left me to look down into his partially filled wine glass as he gathered his words. I waited patiently for him, because I already knew my confession would be just as, if not more messy. “I told you that I had… I had gotten over that um- well, that crush that I had on you… and you should know that I perhaps kind of… sort of… well, like fully lied.”

That… made my entire body still.

Hell, I think my heart stilled too for a moment, completely throwing in the towel at any chance at fixing her irregularity.

I had not been expecting that.

At all .

And… and maybe it was the wine, but I was at a complete loss for words with how to respond.

“But we don’t have to address it!” Isiah rushed out in clear panic. “I mean that, I’m working on getting over it and I promise I won’t do anything to make it weird, it’s just that when you… when you touch me, I sort of… m-maybe we can maybe not like do that so much right now? Just for a bit, until I-”

“I didn’t mind it.” I all but fucking blurted out, cutting Isiah off cleanly.

His brows creased yet again as his expressions went from panic to sheer confusion. “S-Sorry?” He asked unevenly as he all but begged for me to elaborate.

“W-When we were here o-on this couch. A… A year ago… and you…” my voice drifted off slightly, but Isiah’s eyes got wider and wider with every last word I said of this botched explanation I was trying to give for the secret I was now fully revealing to him. “W-When you… you kissed me… I, um… I… I -I… I didn’t… mind it.”

Jesus fucking hell, Dylan, get it the fuck together.

“L-Like you…” Isiah started gently, quietly, clearly caught completely off guard by what the fuck I just said, yet I watched as he shifted just the smallest bit closer to me on this couch. “Like you weren’t offended… or like… like you… like you maybe didn’t hate it-”

“I… I l-liked it.” I whispered back with volume that was almost fucking inaudible, but the way Isiah’s beautiful eyes grew even fucking larger let me know that he had caught it.

Completely.

“L-L-Like you-… like… like you like liked it like as in you liked it in that moment, o-or like you like would like to like it again- I-I mean like, you wouldn’t like mind if it were to like happen a-again, or-”

“L-Like I… l-like I might maybe like want to p-perhaps like do like a do-over… like try it again without… without what- what happened right a-after the kiss… l-like if you were to- to stay after it…”

Those words felt like hellfire to get past my lips…

… and yet I still found myself shifting just a bit closer to his end of the couch. I still found my hand starting to tighten its hold on Isiah’s, simply anticipating what he would say next. I was positive the movie was still playing, yet all I could think about was whether or not Isiah could hear the goddamn erratic pounding of my heart.

“W-Would you… like to perhaps try it like… now? M-Maybe?” He asked me, though I could hear the restraint in his voice as he spoke, and when I very, very fucking slowly nodded my head now, my eyes finally betraying my bonded trust by lowering from his eyes to his soft lips, all I could think about was them on mine again.

That singular thought quickly consumed every crevice of my mess of a mind, overpowering all other thoughts. I could feel myself leaning slightly closer, just praying that what I had admitted- what I so obviously fucking wanted right now… that it wasn’t a mistake.

That I hadn’t managed to reconcile with Isiah only to ruin it for us in a span of a week.

And as it would seem, I wouldn’t get to find my answer tonight…

… for it was the sound of voices just right outside the front door which snapped my tipsy, fervent brain back into some reality. As soon as my eyes darted from the front door to the wine glasses in Isiah and my own’s hands and the almost empty bottle on the table, I felt myself jolt into action as the first real, present word to slip past my mouth was:

“Sh-Shit!”

••

18. Kiss And Tell

Next POV is Don’s just fyi:)

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Carson

“I’m going to fucking strangle you,” Don muttered to me as I patted my pockets down for about the thousand time, looking for the access card I had literally just used to unlock the elevator minutes ago.

“ You’re the one who couldn’t wait till we got inside the home before you accosted me in that damn elevator,“ I replied, reminding him of the events that took place mere moment ago.

“I will not explain myself for kissing my husband in a damn elevator, Carson ,” Don bit back, and yet the arm I had wrapped around his waist was held even tighter by his own hand as he pressed his back flush against the front of me, waiting impatiently outside our front door.

I swear this man’s words never agreed with his damn actions.

“Now hurry the hell up , will you? You know Dylan has my fob, and I’m trying to make sure those two idiots haven’t burned the damn place down in our absence.” Don added, leaning even further into me and my warmth. My free hand was starting to check the side pockets of my laptop bag in a last ditch effort, and after a few more pass throughs, I finally found the damn credit card sized thing in the back sleeve.

“Fucking finally ,” I sighed, holding Don even tighter to me as I passed the card over the black scanner and we heard the door instantly unlock. It was only then when Don finally separated himself from me. And he knew more than well that I really had absolutely no complaints of my own about the way he damn near attacked me in that elevator.

At some point I had to be the one to stop him when he started fumbling with the buckle of my belt, something that went fully against the raging hard on I was trying to calm down as Don led us inside.

The first thing we both noticed as we entered was that the lights in the home had been dimmed. The lit candles on the dining table were what was producing most of the light, and the scent that filled this penthouse smelt incredible , no smoke detected in sight thank god.

“Dad!” Dylan called rather abruptly from the kitchen where both he and Isiah were standing… yet I didn’t need much light at all to notice just how completely flushed Dylan’s face was, and apparently Don didn’t either because he slowed to a stop close to the doorway. “Y-You’re back!”

I ended up reaching for Don’s laptop bag before placing both of ours near the wall closest to his work desk

The silence that soon hung in the air was practically ear shattering as Don’s gaze narrowed on his son and his best friend, but he remained quiet for a good, long minute, simply standing there. Once I joined him at his side, I finally took in just what he saw.

Isiah had… changed from when we last saw him.

His hair was cut shorter now, tapered at the sides which presented more of his matured features, and he had some tattoos peeking out from under his shorter sleeved shirt. As both these kids rocked back and forth slowly- rather nervously, waiting for Don to say something- anything , we were all surprised by what the older man finally settled on.

“Good to see you, Isiah.” He spoke first to the shorter kid who honestly looked like he wanted to shit his pants. “But it’s getting late. The work day really escaped Carson and I.”

And that was when my husband finally turned to look at me, giving me a silent cue that it was my turn to handle whatever the hell the rest of the night called for.

“Isiah, why don’t I drive you home?” I offered. “I think your mum will kill us all if we keep you here longer.”

Isiah nodded almost immediately as more heat spread across his tanned skin. Don had seemingly gotten over his initial surprise as he kicked his shoes off before removing his black wool trench coat and setting it on the back of his office chair. “What I’m in desperate need of right now is sleep… but we’ll plan a day where we can catch up, Isiah. A day I don’t feel like burning this world and everyone in it to the ground.”

“S-Sure thing, Mr. Whittaker-Jones.” Isiah agreed, however his voice sounded a bit off, just like Dylan’s had. I noticed they still had their schoolwork laid out in the living room which was a good sign that at least something got done… but still, I couldn’t help but feel like Don and I were the ones somehow… intruding here, with the lights dimmed so low, and the fucking candles lit.

My husband has seemingly deemed his energy far too depleted to give a damn because he was already heading towards the corridor, probably ready to take a shower and fully crash much like I was. He and I had spent the whole day preparing for John to be in town much longer than usual in a few weeks, with his own husband Derek and what Don referred to as their demon child Herold tagging along for the trip.

I kept telling this handsome man that Herold was getting older and he was far less feisty, but Don still maintained his hatred for that cat even after all these years.

Before said handsome man could fully enter that dark hallway however, his feet slowed to a stop near its entrance. “And Dylan?” He called out, forcing his son’s attention on him again.

“Y-Yes, Pops?” Dylan answered still in one intensely flustered state.

“I’m far too fucking exhausted to give even the slightest bit of a damn that you’re drunk right now… but come morning once I’ve recovered, I am absolutely going to force you to shovel out your own grave before I put a bullet in your head. So get some much needed rest, kiddo. You’ll need it.”

I felt my eyes widen as I finally picked up on what my husband so clearly had already. These two were absolutely at the very least tipsy, and that sudden revelation explained a whole lot more of what was going on with them right now. Dylan’s eyes grew wide with horror at his father, the man who had figured them out all too quickly.

“And Isiah?” Don added, only feeding into the intensity of his words.

“Y-Y-Yes, Mr. Whittaker-Jones?” Isiah replied, damn near losing his vocal cords trying to croak that out.

“You better use this ride home to sober the hell up or two graves will be dug.”

That was the last thing my man said before he finally continued on down that corridor, making a left into our bedroom with the door shutting swiftly behind him.

His threats were absolutely a promise.

“ You two fucking didn’t ,“ I more or less hissed at the two kids who were now scrambling towards the living room to get their school work packed up as my hands tightened themselves firmly across my chest.

There was no way I could save them from Don’s wrath now, and this pair of idiots knew it.

“I-It was just a little wine!” Dylan insisted quietly, working to keep his own voice as low as mine so his father wouldn’t hear. I didn’t mind doing the drive to take Isiah home, but we needed to move quickly because if Dylan’s father knocked out before I got the chance to smooth things over a bit, Dylan would be in for one very isolated school year.

I already knew Don was about to cut that phone off for the indefinite future.

Hell, the only thing saving Dylan from the lecture of his lifetime tonight was the fact that his father really didn’t have it in him right now.

“Hurry up,” I hissed at the two boys who had definitely had more than just a little wine. Every prayer I could think of was being sent up to the most high that Dylan at least cracked open the cheap stuff, otherwise he’d be working all summer to pay that shit back. Don would make sure of it.

Isiah at least seemed to handle his liquor better as it took him just a few minutes to get his school bag packed up, however Dylan with his tall, uncoordinated self definitely looked like he was about to be sleeping some of this off on the couch.

“I… I am so sorr-” Isiah started, moving those feet quickly to meet me at the entrance where I stood, but I quickly shook my head no. The kid knew better than to test Don. I knew this wasn’t his idea at all.

“Say goodbye to Dylan and let’s go, kid, before Don gets a miraculous second wind or some shit.” I all but ordered the man who was now starting to slip his sneakers on as he turned back to Dylan.

“I’ll… I’ll-”

“I-I’ll text you,” Dylan finished for him…

… However, the long look these two shared made my brows crease a bit.

This wasn’t… well, it didn’t seem like it was just the wine anymore. Isiah nodded to Dylan, but I reached for the kid’s backpack before whatever was happening here could continue, and pulled him towards the doorway.

He gave Dylan a short wave goodbye, to which the young, insanely reckless man returned with a nervous yet unusually warm smile that made me question a whole lot more as I yanked the front door open again, and started ushering Isiah by his backpack right out of it.

I wasn’t sure what the complete hell had transpired in the hours these two were left alone… but I sure as hell was about to find out.

“Carson, I am so so so sorry,” Isiah spoke for the hundredth time as the still warm car was pulled out of the underground parking lot quickly. His words still had a slight slurring to them, but I had handed him two bottles of water once we climbed into my SUV and ordered him to chug them.

“What the hell were you two thinking ?” I asked, paying close attention to the tight exit before my car was freed from the lot and I pulled us into the rest of the compound of the Alpines, heading towards the back road.

“We… we were… w-well we just-”

“You better start practicing your penmanship because the only form of communication you two will have access to until Dylan is well into his twenties, will be paper and a pencil.” I spoke firmly as I stole a few glances Isiah’s way from the passenger seat. “Three more years and this would’ve been legal , but you two just couldn’t wait, huh?”

“I’m so so so sorry!” Isiah rushed out in between large gulps of water. He was already almost done with his first bottle of water, which had me lifting up the center console between us to hand him yet another. “ Fuck , Don probably hates me more now.“

That part made my anger still a bit as I took in more of his appearance from the passenger seat before turning my attention back to the road.

“I think we both know it was Dylan who convinced you.” I spoke, reminding him of the certain fact that I knew Dylan. Not as well as Don did considering he clocked that these two idiots were drunk before I did… but Isiah had always been the most respectful whenever he was over.

That, and I highly doubted he was prepared for his own mother’s wrath by how he was slamming this H2O back.

“Please, please tell me you both at least got some work done? And what the fuck happened to your hand, man? What are we telling your mum so I don’t get caught in the crossfire?” These were all questions I needed answers to quickly if Don was to lay off the punishment he was absolutely brewing up in that strict mind of his.

I knew these two were now adults, but there was just no way they could’ve fucked this newfound friendship between them so quickly.

But then my thoughts stalled a moment on that.

Friendship .

“What happened tonight?” I finally settled while I literally felt Isiah searching that surely fogged up mind of his for something that would justify this mess.

“W-We… well uh, yes- yes, we did get work done, but then Dylan and I started dinner and I accidentally burned my hand so we treated it and Dylan used some wine for the steak’s marinade so we just thought that maybe we could pour ourselves a glass without it really being noticeable but then one glass turned to two and then-”

“ Breathe ,“ I cut in, still trying to decipher this jumbled mess falling past Isiah’s lips as I drove. I had already used too much of my brain this week, I did not have the capacity for this too.

Isiah took one deep, long inhale, before he released that breath and went right back to chugging more water. I took the first bottle he soon closed and set in his lap, and tossed it towards the back seat before gesturing for him to crack open the second one. We didn’t have that long of a drive, and my handsome husband had meant every last bit of that threat if Sheila was to notice her son was almost plastered.

“I… I promise though, we did work on the project.” This shorter man insisted, and if I didn’t have both hands on the steering wheel ensuring my driving was still up to par amidst the sleep deprivation, I would’ve brought a few fingers to the bridge of my nose.

“At least the kitchen’s intact,” I all but muttered. Had they actually burnt something, the fate of these two boys lives would’ve been completely out of my hands. “Are you two good, then? You and Dylan? It…” I thought so very long and hard on how to word this next observation. “It felt like Don and I had walked in on something…”

“No, no!” Isiah rushed out quickly.

Too quickly.

“W-We were just… talking.”

Was that what the young kids were calling it these days, I wondered.

“You two were more flustered than from something some wine could take responsibility for,” I noted, turning to look at the kid who was now staring out the passenger window. It felt like he was doing his best to hide his face from me, and yet the redness had already reached his ears. “What did you two talk about?”

Isiah fell silent at that, using the water now as an excuse to avoid saying anything else, yet I couldn’t even protest it because we had about fifteen minutes before he would be home with his fast I was driving, and sobering him up was the clearest objective here.

“We just-… we talked about our birthdays and stuff,” Isiah tried explaining after another large gulp of water… but I only partially believed that. The way Dylan had looked at him, tipsy or not, was very fucking different than before. It was how Don had always looked at me when he woke up to find me already cooking breakfast with Dylan, or when I would complete my work early so I could help the kid with his homework while Don put in more hours of work.

Just a bundle of nerves doused in infatuation.

The only difference was that Don had a thick flair of stubbornness to him that forced him to follow that look up with at least one insult. Dylan, however, wore that look and that smile like an open fucking book tonight.

“You two didn’t… you two didn’t like… do anything tonight… did you?” I asked Isiah as I drove this car off the freeway with the exit, heading into his neck of the woods.

“W-What?” Isiah asked as his head snapped towards my direction finally. “No- no no no no no no, we didn’t- no .”

Okay , I thought to myself, nodding. That was at least one less thing to deal with. “You… were honest… right? You told him how you feel? Dylan just told us on Wednesday that you two worked out your differences but he didn’t specify anything so I’m assuming he knows?”

It took a second, but Isiah finally nodded. “He knows,” he confirmed.

“And… well… how does he feel about it?” I asked as I turned us onto more familiar streets.

Isiah took his sweet time before replying to that. “I’m… not sure,” he stated finally, turning his head back towards the passenger window. “We’re just taking things one day at a time. Slow.”

Slow …

I nodded again as I glanced at the kid.

Slow was good for Dylan. Slow was good for these two. And most importantly, slow was good for Don’s blood pressure.

I didn’t really want to ask this next question because I knew it would bring down the mood entirely… but I was forced to ask it anyway as one of Dylan’s parents. “If Dylan decides on just friends… will you be alright, man?”

That question came just as I was pulling onto the street Isiah lived on… and though I expected Isiah to take some time with his answer, he didn’t.

“Yeah,” he nodded quickly.

While I was very focused on pulling up to the front of Isiah’s apartment, I still caught a glimpse of something that caught my attention with his matured features:

The slight almost knowing smile playing on his lips.

It confirmed my suspicions that something had happened tonight, even though Isiah wasn’t budging on telling me just what had- what they had talked about… but I respected his decision to keep it private.

These two always did love their secrets , I thought quietly to myself as I finally shifted the vehicle’s gear into park.

••

19. Father-Son Bonding Experience

Don

I awoke the next morning cold as fuck.

Something I found as completely unacceptable given the stipulations of my marriage.

My hands reached back for the one man who should’ve been sleeping right next to me providing me with warmth, and as I sniffed the air, my eyebrows furrowed further.

Usually his absence was accompanied by the smell of breakfast cooking.

“What the fuck?” I grumbled, pulling myself up from the cold sheets to grab a silk robe from my closet before I left this cold room to investigate. And as soon as I made it out and past the hallway, I was welcomed by the sight of two children knocked out on the couch.

One was my actual child.

The other was the man-child I married.

Carson was sprawled out against one end of the couch while Dylan was sleeping in similar fashion on the other end. Luckily the couch was large enough to house both these giants, but judging by the empty plate on the coffee table next to the glass of water and bottle of Advil, Carson had probably eaten a late dinner while making sure my child didn’t choke on his own vomit during the night or something.

I wanted my anger to remain within me out of sheer principle, but the small smile that pushed its way across my lips quickly banished whatever I felt about Carson not making it to bed.

I made my way further into the living room to first pick up the piece of paper that was laying on the corner of the coffee table along with everything else. It was the one thing Dylan hadn’t packed up, and as I quickly ran through what was a list of items I could barely pronounce, I found myself picking up the glass of water to take a sip from.

Dylan must’ve needed some shit for that science project, I thought to myself, pulling this robe tighter against my body before I approached my son with that glass of water. It only took a few drops of water from the glass to his face for his body to jolt awake.

This giant first blinked away that sleep as he wiped off the water I spilled onto him before his eyes snapped up at me… but realization soon settled on the promise I made to him last night, and his face went from confusion, to anger, to straight fucking terror.

“D-Dad-” Dylan stuttered, however I briefly pulled my attention away from him to Carson who was starting to stir awake himself, probably feeling the thrashing of Dylan’s legs when he jolted awake.

“Morning, baby.” Carson murmured to me as he, too, blinked away that sleep. Both of them looked absolutely dead to the world but it was now a little past nine in the morning and Carson had plans to go see my mother in laws around ten.

“I see you both didn’t make it to your rooms,” I spoke as I handed the glass of water to Dylan for him to finish off. That wineover was already starting to kick in judging by how tense his face was getting.

“Sorry, love.” Carson replied, stretching his large limbs out. “I was starving, and Dylan was knocked out by the time I got back. He’s too big to carry to his room now so I just let him sleep.”

“It’s fine,” I sighed, picking up the bottle of Advil and passing it to my son next, which he gratefully took. “Which bottle of wine did you crack open?”

“Chateau Montelena,” Dylan answered dutifully, to which I nodded. At least he refrained from the pricier ones.

“Lovely. You have one more hour to text your friends and let them know your phone is on lockdown, then I’m logging you in under my ID. You’ll be grounded from texting or calling unless it’s an emergency, and I will receive all notifications you get so don’t even try it.” I told my rebellious kiddo, watching all shreds of remaining happiness drain from his face.

“How long?” He mumbled, asking quietly.

“Until you die.” I replied.

“Be nice,” Carson cut in, giving me a look which earned him a glare… but my punishments were in fact swayed by this giant idiot.

“ Fine . Two weeks. No hanging out with anyone, just school and home. Also, explain to me why I’m looking at ingredients to build a bomb.“ I added as I waved the paper with the list of items Dylan needed for his project.

“That isn’t for a bomb,” Dylan insisted. I watched him pop open the cap for the Advil before he placed the glass of water between his legs, shook to pills into his hand, and popped them into his mouth before washing them down with a large sip. “I promise , Pops. It’s not a bomb.”

Right now I wouldn’t trust this child if he told me the earth spun on an axis, but I gave the list a look over once again anyway.

“Carson’s going to go see Louise and Sara, so that leaves just you and I you rebellious fucking child. Why don’t we go pick up your bomb making shit together?” I asked Dylan who honestly seemed like he trusted me about as far as he could throw me.

“I… I won’t need a shovel, will I?” He asked, taking my threats from last night as seriously as he fucking should’ve.

“No,” I shook my head. “I will, however, have to make a phone call to see where I’m acquiring half this shit,” I waved the piece of paper in the air again.

“Who ya calling?” Carson asked me, causing my gaze to shift to the tall man who was now pulling himself off the couch. He approached me quickly so he could plant a kiss on my temple, murmuring a quiet apology for not making it to bed, and I found myself turning slightly to place a soft kiss on his lips instead.

This- him taking care of Dylan- was the only reason I wasn’t chewing into him about it.

“I’m calling Brad,” I explained as I felt his arm wrap around my waist to pull me into his side.

“Sounds good,” Carson nodded, “I’ll get started on breakfast then.”

“Stop looking at me like that,” I snapped at my son as I drove us onto the freeway.

“Sorry,” Dylan mumbled, his fingers gently massaging his temples to ease the agony. “I just can’t remember the last time I saw you behind the wheel. I didn’t think you still knew how to drive.”

Jesus, this child was so dramatic.

“Well remember this moment so you don’t act like you’ve seen a damn ghost the next time I have to.” I shot back. “Carson will be gone for the day so you and I are stuck together, and I don’t feel like have an anxiety flare up with you behind the wheel.”

“I’m a fantastic driver,” he tried to argue, but I just rolled my eyes. He already knew I thought he was adequate enough to drive my car, but when we were in the car together and he was driving, we just fed off each other’s anxiety.

“Yeah, well, today you get me. Carson did want to plan a dinner with all of us and his mums soon, though. We’ll figure out a weekend when we can drive out, sound good?” I asked, turning to Dylan for a moment who nodded before massaging that head of his even deeper.

This was his first wineover, and it brought me great happiness to think it would hopefully convince him to never touch my collection again.

A lesson had to be learnt here because Carson was hell bent on cutting the kid some slack. He made me promise I’d consider the last year of hell Dylan went through when he and Isiah weren’t speaking, and unfortunately, I still had somewhat of a heart within my chest cavity that cared.

“Besides getting shitfaced, did you at least enjoy hanging out with Isiah?” I asked, steering the conversation in the direction that scratched my curiosity itch. The two had seemed… awfully close when Carson and I got home. The ambience of the dim lighting wasn’t lost on me, though I knew almost as soon as Dylan spoke that the kid was drunk.

As far as I could tell however, it didn’t seem like things progressed to… inappropriate levels.

And my home was still intact, so besides the drinking, Dylan had followed instructions to both work on the project considering he had drafted a list of items he needed, and he had made dinner. It must’ve been good, too, since Carson’s plate was damn near licked clean, which left me rather excited to try the leftovers once Dylan and I got home.

“Yeah,” Dylan nodded again. “It felt just like old times.”

“Just with my wine this time,” I muttered, taking that sly dig even though Dylan had spent all of breakfast apologizing between bites of his loaded omelet. And he still managed a few more apologies now.

I think he sensed that my punishment could’ve been a whole lot fucking worse had Carson kept his mouth shut for once. He always let me have the final say with Dylan, but this situation was… unique to say the least.

“Hey Pops,” I heard my son ask randomly, and usually whenever Dylan started a sentence like this, I knew whatever followed would be migraine inducing.

“Yes?” I replied as I reached past him to the glove compartment of the car so I could hand him a bottle of water. He was almost done with the one I snagged from the fridge before we left and I knew he’d need more to go toe to toe with his splitting headache. Dylan accepted it gratefully.

“I have a… well, I guess an odd question to ask.”

Oh great.

“Go for it, kid.” Maybe we’d have matching headaches by the end of this errand to really complete this father-son bonding experience.

“How did you know you liked Carson?”

That made me involuntarily slow this car some as I turned to my son again. “Pardon?”

Dylan took the last swig of his previous water before turning back to set the empty bottle in the trash bin connected to the back of his seat. Then he turned to me again. “I mean, how did you like- like how did you know it wasn’t just a friendship?”

“Because I could never under any circumstances see myself being friends with that idiot. We went from sworn enemies to being romantically involved in nanoseconds. It practically gave me whiplash.”

“Five years,” Dylan corrected. “I believe it was five years of flirting or whatever Carson said when he explained it.”

“Don’t get smart,” I quipped. “Carson bends the truth all the time when it comes to explaining how we got together.”

That made Dylan chuckle lightly. “Well how did you know you wanted to be romantically involved? Like what made you fall for him?”

That made me full on scoff. “I tell anyone that’ll listen time and time again that that man wore me down, and yet my words constantly fall upon deaf ears.”

My grumbling rant only made Dylan chuckle more. “What made you stay, then? You’ve been together for eight years… that has gotta count for something right?”

I found myself taking a solid pause before answering. We had the time for it anyways since Brad had sent me across the city to a facility that carried the majority of the random shit Dylan needed. His question made me think on that a moment- my relationship with Carson.

Somehow eight years had felt like they just flew by. I still couldn’t believe we both made it here… but at the same time, I guess I sort of could.

“Let me precursor this by saying that if anything I’m about to say makes it to Carson’s ears, you’ll both be grounded. Understood?” I glanced over at Dylan again who nodded immediately.

I didn’t need this kid gassing that idiot up any more than Carson’s already oversized ego did.

“I guess you could say that I noticed him five years before we started anything… and I guess I continued to notice.” I thought back to this morning- how I had woken up without him in bed with me. When we first got married, I had thought it would be routine that killed all the romance… but having us do everything together was what made that mundane so bearable.

Even the longer hours we’d been putting in at the office.

“Even now, all these years later, I notice when his hands not in mine, or when he’s not at my side. I notice how much more quieter the home is whenever he has to travel, or how I might have an extra meal or two prepped in the fridge because he’s not here to eat me out of house and home.”

That earned me an honest laugh from Dylan which almost earned him a glare because his growing self had also fucked up my grocery budget.

“I could get into the specifics of how comforting his touch is, but I don’t feel like cleaning up your vomit so I’ll spare you the details.”

“Thank you,” Dylan replied gingerly with every ounce of gratefulness in his tone. “Were you ever, like, afraid that if you started something, your dynamic would change?”

That question drew me quite a moment as I thought about it. About what Carson and I were before that night he kissed me. Soon enough, I nodded towards my son. “Yeah. Even now, I’ve realized I’ve gotten soft around him… but that was because I made a promise all those years ago.”

“A promise?” My son questioned curiously.

“Yeah,” I nodded again. “I promised Carson that I would spend the rest of our time together reminding him that I more or less choose him every day, just like he chooses me.”

I thought back again to that night in my kitchen after we had gotten back from the museum. When Carson had confessed his insecurities to me for the first time.

“I promised that regardless of how rigid I can be, and how many nerves of mine he seems to find just so he can get on them… he was my person. He is my person. He will continue to be my person until we’ve reached the end of the road after life has ran its course… or when I finally strangle him in his sleep. Whichever comes first.”

I could feel my son’s eyes on me now.

“And as for things changing… it is scary… but Carson had taught me that not everything I bet on has to be foolproof. He was a risky bet, marrying so soon, but the reward was directly tied to my happiness and that was better than any jackpot win, ya know? High risk, high reward.”

I could see Dylan nodding his head in my peripheral. “What would you say made Carson different from anyone else you’ve ever dated?” This giant child continued with more of those hefty questions.

“Well,” I replied, “for starters, my other partners didn’t make me smile nearly as much. I had complained to him last month about my wrinkles settling in on my face, and the first thing he pointed out were my smile lines. I told him it wasn’t a direct factor, but he told me he was choosing to believe he contributed to how defined they are now, and every time he saw them, it warmed his soul or whatever.”

I still remembered the way he looked at me when he said that, arguing his case like a damn defense attorney.

“It’s sappy shit like that that has made me realize there’s a place in my life for sappy shit to begin with. I’d never admit it in the court of law, but besides you, he’s the only other person in my life that makes me want to create and keep that space. To house it, and nurture it whenever I can.”

Dylan’s smile widened greatly at that.

“But why all the damn questions?” I snapped at my son. “Usually you’re the one telling me to shut up whenever I talk about all the lovey-dovey shit with that man-child and I . What’s got you so curious?”

It was now Dylan’s turn to think of how to answer me. He remained quiet for a good long while, contemplating something, and though I had an inkling of where this was going, I still gave Dylan the space he needed to figure out the words.

“I… I think I… well, I think I might be like maybe- maybe developing feeling for… Isiah.”

I was so close to pulling this car over at Dylan’s surprising, intensely honest response. I hadn’t expected him to come right out with it, even if I already had my suspicions. Especially after last night.

“That’s… something,” I found myself settling on, yet as Dylan remained quiet, I turned to him with a warm, growing smile. “Your first crush then, huh?”

Dylan slowly nodded as he relaxed a bit more in his seat. “My first anything . And I’m just scared that maybe I won’t-… maybe I’m not suited to try anything romantic with anyone. I’ve never done it before, ya know?”

“Well before you moved in with me, you thought you hated so many foods because you had never tried it, right?” I asked my son, further reminding him of the complete hell I went through when he first showed up at my doorstep eight years ago… and subsequently reminding him of just how far we had come together since.

“Yeah,” Dylan’s voice was quieter as he nodded.

“If you two talk about it, and you think the feelings might be mutual from Isiah,” I had to throw that last part in because Dylan still didn’t know that Isiah had confessed his full feelings to Carson already over that phone call. It sounded like the kid was willing to move heaven and fucking hell at just the chance to try and see if there’s something more there. “If the feelings are there for him, too, then just explain to him that perhaps you might have to take things a bit slower.”

“ Slower… “ Dylan reiterated more to himself. “Okay… yeah. Yeah I could do that. I’m just- I’m worried that maybe he’s not really… used to slower . I don’t want to make him unhappy while I - I try to sort things out.”

I gave my son another warm smile. “Well that’s the beauty of having eight years of friendship, kiddo. You have someone who knows you the absolute best… I think he’d understand exactly where you’re at and the time you might need.”

And my words seemed to be successful enough because Dylan offered me one immediate grin. “Thanks, Dad. Seriously. Thank you for always being so transparent.”

“Anytime kiddo.” I assured him with a smile of my own as I removed my right hand from the steering wheel to ruffle up his long strands of curly hair.

I liked how he was growing it out. Especially because it meant I didn’t have to pay for constant haircuts anymore. His hair grew so damn fast.

“I made a promise to you long ago, too, kiddo, and that was that I would only shield you from harm when I can, withholding truth at times when necessary for your safety… but I wouldn’t lie to you. You might be eighteen now, but you’ll always be my kid. Whatever changes you’re experiencing, I’ll be right here to see it through with you… even if it is constantly adding years to my fucking age.”

••

20. Unraveling Desires

Dylan

Good ol’ Daddio was not fucking joking about the lockdown he put me on with my phone. And the worst part was: I still had to figure out how I was going to convince him to let me go to Isiah’s on Friday night for dinner. Especially because I had wanted to give him his birthday present then… not at school.

The plan was to absolutely not even think of mentioning the movie we were going to go see, then maybe I could convince Isiah not to tell his mum about that part if he hadn’t already, and we could just spring the plan on her Friday night then beg her to swear to secrecy.

That was pretty much my million dollar idea right now.

The text I sent to Isiah Saturday morning went as follows:

Hey, I’m about to be grounded for two weeks so I won’t be able to text back after this but I’ll talk to you at school about it Monday morning. I hope you’re having a great weekend! And just FYI my dad’s logging in under his Apple ID… so… let’s just check in Monday morning

Then I quickly added:

Also, I had a really nice time last night

And as I read it back to myself, I realized that the added text sounded like I was seemingly following up after a date we had together or something, but my dear old father calling me from the living room telling me to hurry it the fuck up was what had me hitting send before I could even think of a possible revision.

I also sent one last text to Molly before I had to pass my phone over to my father right before we left, and he changed my password to my own Apple ID, logged in as himself, then passed it back to me.

I wanted to shed a tear or two to sell the dramatics… but I knew that the punishment could’ve been so much worse than this if my dad felt like it. Honestly I probably owed Carson for making sure it was minimal…

… but still… being forced to stay in the house and clean all day Sunday made the day drag on as slow as fucking molasses. I couldn’t even complain since my dad dished out a good penny for our science project items, only making me feel more indebted to the man.

So much so, I practically did the meal prepping for the week come late afternoon Sunday.

The only silver lining was the fact that good ol’ Pops was in a better mood after finishing the venison steak and stir fry with a side of his mother’s Boxty. He had walked over to where I was sitting on the couch working on some homework, bent down and ruffled up my hair, then placed a kiss on my forehead as he whispered “well done,” before returning to his office desk to get more work done.

That action alone had me feeling the most fucking proud, and the feeling more or less carried me through the remainder of the weekend.

Carson didn’t get home Saturday until late into the night, so we only caught up briefly with him while he ate the dinner my dad had set aside from what we cooked together earlier, then we all retired to our beds.

After meal prepping Sunday, I found myself doing something I hadn’t done in a few years, contrary to what my father believed to be true…

And that was that I actually put effort into picking out all my clothes for school the following day. I hadn’t put much effort into that shit in years.

I liked to think it was because I had literally nothing but fucking time on my hands, yet as I started to rummage through my wardrobe, I quickly realized that I was putting far more effort into this outfit than I ever really had before.

Honestly I felt like Molly when she FaceTimed me in Ireland to show me every meticulously planned outfit for the first month of school. I sort of wished I could FaceTime her while making my own selection, but I was yet again reminded by the simple fact that I was on lockdown. Oh, the joys.

Now it was awfully early in the morning on Monday, so early I could hear my father and Carson moving about, getting ready for the day. Judging by their minimal chatter, I assumed they both must’ve been over it, but they moved pretty quickly regardless and were out the door by 6:30AM, allowing me to further spiral by thinking whether what I had chosen for an outfit was something I was going to actually roll with.

I had gotten to the high school early. Earlier than Molly that was for sure because her parents usually dropped her off, and they didn’t work until 7:45AM. This meant that I was more than prepared for no sweet bone crushing welcome at my locker like I was used to… but as I still made my way there to drop off the textbooks from my backpack, I was surprised to see one particular guy leaning against my very locker. That signature leather jacket paired with a white t-shirt and some faded light blue jeans, as his still slightly damp hair made his brown curls far darker and more defined.

Those curls at the top fell forward slightly as he had his head remained tilted down to scroll through his phone, and I noticed the tapered sides were freshly shaven, those slits cut sharply into them.

I couldn’t control how suddenly my heartbeat started to pick up as my gaze traveled slowly every part of him this morning, and these feet of mine carried me quicker, taking long strides towards him.

Isiah quickly lifted his head from his phone screen. He turned his head in the otherwise empty hall for his hazel-green eyes to meet mine, and the smile that quickly spread across my lips were matched with one stellar smile of his own.

“H-Hi,” I rushed out all too swiftly, regardless of how desperately my mind was telling me to get a goddamn grip . It was yelling at both me and this heart of mine that wouldn’t quiet herself no matter how hard I tried.

“Hi,” he replied as his smile gently widened. I watched his eyes slowly shift from mine to wander dangerously slow down my larger frame, and at that simple action alone, heat rose to my face like it was returning home.

Shit .

“Y-You’re um-… you’re in early.” I tried to note as I watched those eyes then travel leisurely back up to meet mine, and he took a step or two forward so I could eventually pass by him to open up my locker. My brain was so instantly fried, I barely remembered what the hell my lock combination even was, and it took me a few failed attempts with my slightly shaking fingers to get it right as I hopelessly tried to fucking focus.

“Y-Yeah… I uh- I got up a bit earlier than usual,” was the best my brain could do at the current moment.

Fuck, he smelt so fucking good .

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to call-”

“It’s okay,” Isiah assured me quickly. “I’m sorry to hear you got grounded.”

I found myself chuckling a bit nervously at that. “Don’t apologize… that was completely my fault anyway,” I assured him because it completely was. I had thought a little liquid courage would help me get over my awkwardness around him, and all it did was make me admit to Isiah far more than I ever would’ve admitted when sober.

My hands tried to make some haste as they quickly shuffled out some books from my backpack before I got my locker closed again, and the real unfortunate reality was that there was no place to hide my flushed face as Isiah looked up at me, watching me closely.

Fuck , he looked and smelt so goddamn good it was actually a criminal offense at this point- the slight spice undertones mixed with his cologne, and that new shampoo…

I thought back to how I had acted in that kitchen Friday night, and every part of my body reacted almost immediately at the memory, reminding myself of just how close I’d come to-… well, to- to doing more-

“Do you think your old man will still let you come over Friday?” Isiah asked rather hesitantly. I wanted to say yes- to assure him that I’d figure it out somehow, yet I decided I’d just explain my plan in full.

“I’m thinking of telling him it’s just dinner then us working on the project. I’m absolutely under no circumstances telling him about us catching a movie,” I spoke, turning to Isiah now. My body’s temperatures were not matching the chilling temperatures of this highschool, and now I regretted wearing a thick sweater above a button-down undershirt.

I felt like I was burning the fuck up.

“That’s a solid plan,” Isiah nodded as he stepped to the side slightly for us to begin walking to our first period together. We had about fifteen minutes before class started, but there was already a few early risers wandering the otherwise almost empty halls, barely ready to tackle another Monday. “My mum’s on call that night at the hospital so I don’t think she’ll be around long after dinner. We should be in the clear to slip out for a few hours. You think of a movie you wanna see?”

That only brought even more heat to my face.

Me thinking about us in a dark theatre together, watching something Isiah would most likely pretend not to hate.

And the truth was that I had decided on a movie. The scariest one actually as I thought about the offer I had made to help the poor lad through it.

“Let There Be Blood,” I told this handsome man who I had done everything to keep my eyes on the remainder of the hall ahead, and not on him.

I could still easily see the grimace from Isiah through my peripheral when I mentioned the film I had chosen.

“You really do love to see me suffer, don’t you,” he muttered lightly, which brought a slight smile to my lips.

“I um… I- I did offer you my hand t-to hold,” I reminded him with my mess of a voice, which pulled Isiah’s attention away from the hall to me.

“An offer I’m absolutely cashing in on,” he replied more quietly with that low tone of his, something which made me feel like my body was basking in the scorching heat of a hot August sun. I soon slipped my hands into the pockets of my slacks once I felt them start to get clammy from the nerves.

I still didn’t know how to act right when around him. I didn’t know where to take things from where we had left them, nor how to talk to him about it now that we could only really do so at school for the next few weeks… face to face…

It was always easier over the phone cause then I didn’t sound like such a blubbering idiot, and my brain didn’t feel like such mush from how his mere presence made me forget all rational reasoning.

I had partially hoped that this week would be busy so I wouldn’t have to focus so hard on acting normal, but then that made me think of his comment Friday night- how he had admitted that he didn’t really know how to act normal around me either whenever I-

“Dylan?” Isiah spoke more softly as we neared Zinfel’s classroom.

“Hmm?” I replied almost instantly, and far too fucking fast, which made Isiah smile as I turned to him slightly.

“Penny for your thoughts?” He then asked. “Straight honesty before we’re succumbed to quiet pleasantries to appease he who shall not be named .”

I couldn’t help but smile at how he had described Zinfel. As far as Isiah and I were aware, Mondays always fucking sucked in his class, regardless of the subject. I could practically feel a pop quiz coming on which only slowed my steps, and Isiah probably felt it too because we were both in no rush to make it to our hellish destination.

“Honesty, you say?” I teased lightly, to which Isiah nodded, and as those light, damp curls fell forward slightly again, as did my heart as she all but launched herself off the nearest cliff. I couldn’t help but think of how they might’ve felt- the thick stands curled around my fingers.

How I had used to ruffle his hair all the time… but now I wanted nothing more than to run my fingers through it, testing whether they were just as soft as they looked- as they always were.

“I-I’ve been thinking about how… how different your scent is now.” I replied far more quietly, perhaps in hopes he wouldn’t catch that at all. But  of course he did. And the fainted color that deepened the skin tone of his cheeks forced my gaze away from him all too fast in hopes I wouldn’t replicate that more flushed state, then triple it.

“Oh?” Isiah asked with a slightly courser tone.

What a fucking weird thing to say , I chastised myself quietly. Not even five minutes had passed between us, and I was making things weird yet again.

“Y-Your shampoo-” I then rushed out in hopes of defending such an insane observation. “Your hair… it’s- it’s still damp. I… was thinking about your new shampoo.”

It surely wasn’t the best I could do, but fuck it, it would have to suffice.

“Oh,” Isiah replied with a little more understanding… but that roughness remained in his voice when his right hand lifted again to run his own fingers through his curls. I heard him faintly chuckle in realization. “Sh-Shit, you’re right. I clearly did a piss poor job of drying it-”

“I like it,” my idiot self all but blurted out, and at this point, if I could shove myself into a locker, I would, but we had long since passed them as I noticed Zinfel’s office just some steps away.

“The… dampness?” He asked me as that curiosity returned.

And considering I was already so far in the hole with this conversation… all I could do was nod, watching all too fucking intently at how his curls fell again. I had wanted to feel them for myself so badly, I could feel my hands start to fidget in my pockets, pulling at a few loose strings of fabric from the stitching.

“They um… they uh- they make your curls more defined.” I explained, and as I watched a curl fall aimlessly from the rest… I couldn’t stop myself from doing something about it. My brain didn’t connect with the functions of my right hand in time before I slipped it from my front pant pocket and reached up towards Isiah, using those still trembling  fingers to push that curl back a bit gently.

His hair wasn’t as soft as I remembered…

It was softer.

So soft, I didn’t quite pull my hand away as Isiah and I both slowed to an eventual stop right outside Zinfel’s door.

Instead, this very hand of mine slid my fingers delicately through a bit of his curls before they fell to his tapered sides, trailing themselves with little hesitancy along his perfect hairline and cleanly shaven slits.

I hadn’t realized what I was doing until I felt the softness of Isiah’s skin right near his temple… and the sharpest inhale he took yanked me back to reality like Scorpions chains from Mortal Kombat.

“Sh-Shit- shit , sorry-” I muttered, realizing I was probably overstepping on every fucking front right now, but Isiah quickly shook his head no, waiting patiently for my eyes to find his again even though I barely could. “I-I didn’t- I was just- i-it looks so soft, I-”

“D-D-Don’t apologize,” he stuttered out, which made my already reactive body all the more unrecognizable. “Y-You can touch i-it- m-me- it whenever you’d like.”

And those words alone just about sent me fucking spiraling .

I felt my eyes betray me just like my hand had before it retreated to the safety of my front pocket, and these eyes of mine finally fell from his to something else that looked oh so fucking incredibly soft. Something I had felt once against me, which left me wondering the same thing I had Friday night…

Was his lips as soft as they were that night a year ago?

And would he allow me to test that theory too? The one where i believed they might be even softer now?

I wasn’t sure what had shifted so drastically between us… but I oh so fucking desperately wanted to see if my assumptions were indeed correct.

If he would feel as inexplicably, startlingly as good as he felt that night… or if our second kiss could be better- more than just the light fleeting peck of our first.

I just… I didn’t want him to run away again, yet something told me that he wouldn’t. He had practically told me that he wouldn’t.

He… still liked me , I reminded myself.

And I wanted him to want it… his lips on mine… just as fucking desperately as I fucking did right now.

The only thing that gave me a glimmer of real hope that he did was when his gaze lowered itself slowly, finding its way down to my own lips with a look on his face that almost made me do something completely, entirely fucking unhinged. It had made me fully forget just where we were for a moment here…

Standing right outside of first period.

••

21. L Is For The Way You Look At Me

Getting Substack together now lol

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Isiah

This school week was by far the most challenging week of my entire fucking life.

And it all started on Monday morning, when my body woke me up at the asscrack of dawn because I genuinely couldn’t sleep knowing I’d finally get to see Dylan again. Not being able to text or call him was absolutely more of a punishment than anything my mum could come up with… but she had honestly been far too tired Friday night to even notice I was remotely tipsy.

She spoke with Carson briefly after he had walked me all the way inside, thanking him profusely for chatting with me earlier in the week like the man orchestrated a baptism or something, but that was about it. As soon as her and I made it upstairs from the apartment lobby to our unit, we both knocked the hell out.

Her from exhaustion. Me from the wine.

I felt like shit that Dylan was dealt a blow by his father because of what we did, yet he assured me as soon as Monday morning rolled around, that it could’ve been a hell of a lot worse.

And I believed him…

Yet my brain stopped operating correctly the second I saw that man approach the locker I was leaning against, waiting patiently for him.

Dylan had chosen a thick cream colored sweater which he paired with a light blue undershirt and some carbon black slacks. He looked unbelievably good, and as soon as I saw that gorgeous smile, his long curled hair, and got a good whiff of his cologne as he passed by me to open his locker, I knew I was completely fucked .

My mind kept telling me to do what I had agreed upon- to take things slow . I had literally just gotten the revelation of a fucking lifetime Friday night when… when he…

I don’t think my body had ever been so goddamn conflicted on what to do that night. I didn’t know what was okay between us as my gaze weighed heavily on every perfect feature of his, right down to his soft lips. I had still remembered how they felt against mine, however brief our first mess of a kiss was.

Then Dylan had essentially said he wanted a do-over, and my last few brain cells were completely obliterated. He had successfully made me a stammering, blubbering mess that night as I tried to wrap my head around that secret. What he had admitted to me.

He didn’t mind the kiss. He had…

Well… he had liked it.

My entire Saturday was then spent with me pacing around my room like a mad man as I tried to understand what this now meant. Like in general, and for us.

We hadn’t had the chance to discuss it on Friday before Carson and Don got home… then the look Don immediately gave me as he did a once-over on my appearance had made me remember that I didn’t look like the Isiah he knew anymore. And that coupled with my insane nerves because just minutes before they walked through that door, I was fairly fucking certain Dylan and I were going to kiss again, all of that mixed with the wine had me the most flustered yet purely petrified.

What I had appreciated, however, was Carson’s conversation with me as he drove me home. I also appreciated the bottles of water he insisted I drink so Don wouldn’t make good on his word about digging two graves.

And while I hadn’t revealed much to Carson about Dylan and I, mainly because I never did when it came to our secrets with each other, they were for our ears only, Carson didn’t press for more information either.

He had simply just let me know that he was there if I ever wanted to talk… but I wanted to talk to Dylan first. I wanted to know what exactly he wanted between us and what he even felt comfortable with anyone else knowing before I so much as considered considering telling anyone else anything else about it.

I didn’t want to fuck this up again. I couldn’t lose him like that again.

This last year had really fucked me up.

Monday was spent with mostly me gawking at the man in every period we shared together. I genuinely had taken things to such new heights, that at some point Dylan leant a little closer to me in our first period that did unfortunately consist of a pop quiz, and spoke ever so lightly my way while Zinfel took the briefest of personal calls out in the hall, to whisper:

“You… y-you can’t keep glancing at me. Zinfel will think we’re cheating and give us an automatic zero.”

And I boldly whispered back without wasting a moment, nor a breath between my words as I said, “you have no fucking idea how fucking good you look today and it’s almost infuriating that you don’t know, so please don’t blame me for my actions.”

It was safe to say that Dylan’s face got redder than his damn class folder in an instant… but that was the only communication that passed between us before Zinfel returned, and the room fell completely silent once again.

Dylan and I spent our fourth period focusing on our science project. This time I was far less concerned about how often my eyes found their way back to him again, and I’d wager he was stealing his own glances as we both worked hard to concentrate on our method notes.

“It was mad cool of your Pops to get all that stuff,” I said genuinely once Dylan ran over the list of supplies he had picked up Saturday afternoon with his dad.

“He thinks we’re building a bomb,” this handsome man replied back which had me cracking up immediately.

“I mean, technically , we did build a stink bomb in the seventh grade that we accidentally let off in your guys’s home… so I can kinda see his concern.”

Dylan gave me a gorgeous lopsided grin at that, probably recalling the moments we thought our life was on the line that one gloomy afternoon. We were both forced to do all our science experiences on the rooftop patio of The Alpines that Don had built about 6 years ago, for a whole year before he trusted us again.

I thought I’d be banned from stepping foot in his home again after that, but he found it in his heart to forgive us… eventually.

“I’m planning on begging him to release me from these shackles for an evening Friday, this afternoon, so I’ll let you know by tomorrow morning whether or not my grand ol Daddio has taken some pity on me.” Dylan explained as we continued working side by side just like we always did, with him on my right and I on his left so our dominant hands were buddied right next to each other. “Push comes to shove, I’ll just try to sneak out or something.”

I found myself dropping my pencil on my notepad before my hand quickly fell below my desk to reach across and place it on Dylan’s left thigh. His head snapped towards me immediately from the unexpected gesture.

“While I’m willing to tackle the very depth of hell- Tartarus with you… let’s not head there prematurely at the hands of your father. We still have a science project to absolutely dominate, remember?”

I watched as Dylan’s face flushed a deep crimson as I gave his thigh the most gentlest of squeezes, but when I started to move my hand away from the warmth of him, reluctantly so really, Dylan quickly dropped the pencil in his left hand before he brought that very hand to mine, placing it above my own and stopping me from pulling away.

We had already been sitting so close… but now… now I wanted to be a whole lot fucking closer than this.

I felt my heart rate get her groove back as she was quick to remind me that regardless of us being in class, I still wanted his lips on mine right the fuck now. That simple thought then had me lowering my gaze from his light eyes to the very thing that had plagued damn near all my thoughts like an invasive species. Those lips of his were tinted from him running his teeth across them roughly while we worked away, something he always did to concentrate better… and now I was nothing but purely tempted to soothe the slight swollenness with my own.

“I…” Dylan started, his deep, rich voice much lower and raspier now, “r-right-” I felt his hand hesitantly yet gently squeeze mine, pressing it a bit more firmly on his thigh, and us being this close revealed far more than I expected it to- like the way his breathing drew a bit heavier and his eyelids lowered ever so slightly as he studied me just as intently.

Would it have been insane to just lean in? I wondered.

He was… so fucking close…

But all that was disbanded and Dylan pulled away rather abruptly once Sarah, the girl who sat a few rows over, turned back to ask if she could borrow Dylan’s graphing calculator for whatever her science project was.

And that was pretty much that, however I did notice Dylan shift a bit uncomfortably in his seat before he scooted over just a tad bit more so our shoulders practically touched as we continued working.

Every now and then, they’d brush up against each other which made both our lips tug up into a small smile, but we didn’t dare to look at one another when they did.

It was almost like we both knew it wasn’t really safe to test our limits in class.

Our lunch was then taken at the bleachers, yet somehow Dylan managed to get there before I did this time. I had zero clue how, but he did, and I took the bleacher steps two at a time to get to him quickly with my lunch bag in hand.

“Hi,” his smile widened as soon as I sat down. It had already stretched across his lips as soon as he spotted me sprinting up the steps.

“Hi,” I replied with a smile of my own, letting out a light laugh as I saw that he had already started segregating all his healthy parts of lunch. I started opening my own bag to pull out what I had gotten him as a little surprise.

“I couldn’t ask you for any requests this weekend, so I went with a candy bar and some Hot Cheetos-”

Dylan was quick to push his apple and veggies with dip my way before he stuck out his large hands to accept my gifts, pulling another even heartier laugh from me almost immediately as I removed the snacks and set them in his palms.

We sat as we usually did for optimal lunch sharing, with both our legs on either side of the bench, however I noticed that Dylan shifted closer, extending his left leg past my right gently as the inner part of his calf settled against the outer part of mine.

I found myself glancing up from my lunch bag to look at him, and though the tips of his ears were a bit redder than usual, even for the chillier weather this autumn afternoon, he kept his eyes locked in on unwrapping the chocolate bar first, refusing to meet my gaze.

The warmth from his leg alone had my heartbeat going through it, but I tried to focus on some actual conversation between us, and not the intense thought of him touching me. Even something as small as this just further reminded me of how goddamn desperate I was for him.

“So… Molly is genuinely throwing a Halloween party next month. Both her parents will be out of town that weekend, and while I told her that sounds like a mess waiting to happen, she’s interpreted this as divine intervention from the gods. Apparently they’ve favoured her or some shit.” Dylan mumbled, informed me as he bit into the chocolate.

That made me smile. “Sounds like a perfect opportunity to show off our costumes. When should we start getting those together?” I then asked. My mum didn’t want me working through the school year, but I had debated putting in some hours somewhere just to make a little extra cash.

“First week of October?” Dylan offered, finally meeting my gaze again.

“Sounds like a plan. And I’m still pushing for the tights you know,” I added with a growing grin.

“Not fucking happening,” Dylan shut me down immediately, and that grin of mine was accompanied by some laughter.

I hadn’t noticed when exactly I had done it during our lunch as Dylan chatted about the new Mortal Kombat game coming out that he wanted us to try and get our hands on a demo of… but sometime during, my knee had bent back to wrap my calf over his extended leg, locking it in there. And perhaps the action was minimal, but I just wanted him closer to me while still respecting the fact that we were at school.

Right now it was the only place I got to see him.

I didn’t dare even begin to mention whether or not we would ever be openly affectionate here, nor how Dylan felt about being any bit, even a shred bit open about us…

Because right now, us was a massively recent development.

Tuesday and Wednesday were more of a blur. Don had forgot that Dylan had a doctors appointment scheduled for Tuesday afternoon, so we only shared first period together, then I decided to hang out with Ryker for my lunch lunch since Dylan left after third period. Ryker stopped by to hand me a cigarette and we smoked in his car while he chatted about the work he’d be doing at his father’s shop in the coming weeks.

I made him show me the bruise on his side that was luckily starting to fade, but the whole thing made me sick- him still speaking about working for his abusive as shit father.

Everything about it was so fucking disturbing, and I hated that he felt so… stuck. Our friendship only worked because I didn’t judge him- I didn’t try to preach to him like I’m sure most teachers at our school already did. Hell, it was probably the reason he kept his distance from this place in the first fucking place…

…But there was no denying that he needed to take school and graduation seriously if he ever wanted to get out of this completely fucked situation.

And honestly, as Dylan and I grew closer again, it made me realize something far more startling:

How lucky I really was to have him.

To have someone who didn’t just see potential, but saw an entire future for me, right down to age he had calculated I could retire at given whatever profession I chose to go in.

And I was blessed to have parents like mine who refused to have me follow in their footsteps, and forced accountability on me with all my actions. They had always told me that they would never put pressure on me to be the best … but they would do everything within their power and finances for me to be better .

Spending the last year hanging with Ryker had at times made me jealous that he could do whatever the fuck he wanted whenever the fuck he wanted. That he didn’t have parents breathing down his neck…

But seeing Dylan again had reminded me just how much I knew about him. How much he had confided in me about his mum’s abusive ex, telling me things that he admitted he hadn’t even been fully honest with his own father about.

He was… he was left alone so fucking much.

And perhaps from the outside looking in, any kid would’ve thought it was blissful freedom…

But seeing Dylan again reminded me that it wasn’t. It never was.

It was neglect.

And showing up was what was love was. It was what Don had done these last eight years without a second thought.

And so when I got home that Tuesday afternoon after Ryker had dropped me off, and I waited for my mum to get off work, I made sure to hug her a whole lot harder than I usually did.

Than I possibly ever had, just letting her know I appreciated her and every sacrifice she made.

Wednesday went by much better considering Dylan was actually there for the full day. Zinfel had finally graded our pop quizzes from Monday, so most of the period was spent with half the class getting their asses chewed the fuck out, while the other half were just grateful they weren’t on the chopping block.

Dylan and I were lumped in that latter group, thanking whatever divine intervention conspired to get us each a 100% score because I surely guessed on at least 5 of those 20 questions.

I had to spend some extra time at the welding shop that day which at first I was genuinely pissed off about because that meant no bleacher lunch again, but Dylan asked if he could just eat lunch with me there, and I all to hastily agreed.

I forced myself to focus that period since I was wielding a bunch of shit I could hurt myself with, and some of the equipment was loud, but Dylan didn’t seem to mind at all. He found a safe space far away from the sparks while I cut through metal, choosing to use this opportunity to simply watch me.

He and I were using about every second we could during the school days to be in each other’s company considering the late night texts and phone calls wouldn’t be a thing for a few days while Dylan was grounded…

And I loved every minute of it- him just wanting to be as close to me as I did him.

I ended up waiting at Dylan’s locker every morning this week, and with each day that passed, Dylan would get there sooner.

He already looked incredible in anything he chose to wear… but I noticed the little things, like his clothes being more firmly pressed, or his naturally curly hair holding this amazingly scented product that complimented his cologne while adding texture to his curls.

Amidst the thick clouds of Axe body spray that seemed to follow most students as they abused the hell out of that overbearing scent, Dylan’s cologne was light. Relaxing . Subtle yet noticeable from how unique it was. And it was that subtle scent that was the most intoxicating.

The first thing Dylan told me Thursday morning was that his father gave him the green light to come over for dinner Friday evening after much deliberation between Don and my mum. Per Dylan’s request, I hadn’t mentioned to her anything about us catching a movie together, so to my understanding, she just told Mr. Whittaker-Jones that we’d all be eating together then Dylan and I would continue with our project. Until around ten or eleven at night.

Judging my how excited my mum was to see Dylan again, I assumed she had much to do with persuading Dylan’s old man, and I was just grateful that she had that kind of pull.

Dylan and I finally got to have lunch on the bleachers again Thursday afternoon, with him sitting closer yet again as we did another extensive trade of goods. I loved how happy sweets made him, and though I was sure with him now having reliable transportation, he could just go out and snag something himself…

But something told me her preferred me as his sugar dealer. And I carried that badge with honor.

That was just the torch I was burdened to carry. Something I did so all too willingly.

School had been decent enough this week for us to keep our comfortable communication going, but there was no denying my excitement for when Friday finally rolled around. When I could finally have time with him where we weren’t surrounded by a bunch of other students who made whatever Dylan and I were navigating together, all the more stressful.

I didn’t want more eyes on this until I determined what this actually was.

And judging by the excitement on Dylan’s face as he took a brisk walk towards me first thing Friday morning, showing up to his locker at about the same time I had, I knew he felt exactly what I did.

We were finally going to get some time together that wasn’t heavily saturated in academics.

Perhaps more time to… explore what it was we talked about on that couch a week ago.

I wanted us to have a do-over on that kiss, too.

I wanted to get it right this time with him.

••

22. Last Friday Night

Completely unedited but it’s the weekend and imma FINALLY have time to edit shit lol

Enjoy lovelies!

Dylan

It took about everything in me to make it to Friday.

I was so goddamn over the week before it even started, and the only thing motivating me to still show up each day was one particular guy who had decided to meet me at my locker each morning, surprising me by how early he had made it in.

I was… I was starting to get attached to it- to seeing him more… but it wasn’t quite the same at school. He and I couldn’t really talk about certain things.

Or say certain things.

Or do certain things, actually…

And by the time Friday rolled around, I couldn’t wait to bode farewell to this school week. The fact that I was going to be spending the whole afternoon and evening with Isiah at his place was the only thing keeping me going honestly. My dad barely approved of allowing me out the house but Isiah’s mum assured him that she wanted to see me just as much, if not more than her son did.

And she hadn’t been lying on that front either. Not by a long shot.

Isiah and I agreed that I would drive us to his right after school, but I wasn’t expecting the warmest of welcomes I received from his mum as soon as we made it past his front door leading to their kitchen.

“Don’t ever leave me like that again,” Sheila wailed dramatically as she pulled me in for yet another bone crushing hug. I had barely even made it through the doorway at this point, but I didn’t mind it one bit as I hugged her back with just as much force. She was probably the most eccentric yet grounded woman I had ever known, with a personality that always felt refreshing when I found myself back in the company of it.

I kept telling Isiah that he got paired with the coolest mum ever, but he always replied saying that there were forces at work here deceiving me of which I could not see.

“It’s always a pleasure,” I replied, grinning wide as soon as Sheila let my mangled frame go. It felt too good to be back here, in a home that felt like just another home for me. And seeing Isiah himself finally relax as he took both our school bags after kicking his shoes off near the door, made me release a tense sigh that I had been holding in all throughout this drive.

Since it was Friday, it took actual work to get us both out of the school parking lot, then we had a bit of a drive to Isiah’s home which gave me more anxiety.

“Why don’t you and Isiah get situated while I finish cooking? Meatloaf is almost done!” Sheila beamed, gesturing quickly with her hands for me and Isiah to go fuck off somewhere for a bit, and we all too happily agreed. I didn’t even try to reach for my backpack because Isiah was already a few steps ahead, leading both me and it further inside this homey apartment.

“I’d like to issue a formal apology in regard to my mother,” Isiah spoke as soon as we were out of earshot of his mum.

“Apology denied,” I answered quickly, following him down the hallway to his bedroom. “I’ve missed her just as much, if not more. And she’s making my favourite meal so she gets as many hugs as she’d like.”

That got a good chuckle out of Isiah, with him pushing past his bedroom door for us both to walk through.

“What time do you have to head home?” He then asked me, but I just shrugged.

“No clue. Pops didn’t give me any details, he just said I had to check in periodically.” And that was the honest truth. I thought the man was going to list an exact time right down to the minute, but after getting off the phone with Sheila, he didn’t seem to have any issues with these plans. “Oh!” I exclaimed rather suddenly as I moved to my backpack on the bed. “I also brought your birthday gift.”

I had packed it this morning, hoping I’d have time tonight to actually gift it to him, and this seemed like the perfect time as we both waited for dinner because I was not about to forget again.

“You really didn’t have to get me anything,” Isiah insisted, yet his voice sounded closer with each word. And soon enough, I felt him near my side, peeking over my shoulder as I pulled the small black box out from the second pocket of my bag.

“Of course I did,” I answered before holding the box out gently to Isiah. “As soon as I saw this, I knew I had to get it.”

There was a bit of hesitancy there as Isiah reached for it, but I could see that his curiosity outweighed all of that, and as soon as he cracked the velvet jewelry box open, his eyes widened immediately. “… you… y-you didn’t…”

“ Oh but I did ,“ I found those words with ease as a grin quickly swept across my lips. “The way you love that movie must be studied… and since I was in Ireland and all, I thought there was no better a time to try and locate this.”

Isiah gently removed the cross pendant attached to a black metal chain from the box, setting the box itself comfortably back on his bed as he held the metal cross pendant in his hands, holding it towards the fading light from his bedroom window to get a better look at the engraving.

One of Isiah’s favourite movies was The Boondocks Saints, and about six years ago, I had somehow managed to get my hands on a lamp that had the two gun silencers as the stand which he still used as his bedside lamp to this day… but once I saw this necklace at a small shop in the town of Dublin, I knew I had to get it for him.

He wasn’t religious by any means, unless you counted the way he religiously recited this movie word for word each year we watched it around St. Patty’s. He was also a massive Willem Dafoe fan, as was I, so his obsession was completely warranted.

“Can I, um…” my voice trailed off slowly, still figuring out how to speak without sounding so goddamn off all the time. “C-Can I put it on you?”

That was when Isiah finally looked up from the black pendant. I had begged myself to believe that the necklace as a whole wasn’t too heavy because the metal did have some weight to it, but Isiah then nodded quickly, stretching his hand out with the gift inside it so I could do the honors. Honors I had no business honoring because I knew some space between us was what was safer.

I watched as he slipped his leather jacket off, then fixed the collar of his shirt as he turned around to face his bedroom window. My hands shook slightly from the sheer amount of nerves that accompanied this request, but eventually I unhooked the clasp of the chain and took a few steps forward to him, drawing nearer than I had meant to.

This… position … being this close again with his back to me had practically body slammed me with memories of when we were in my kitchen last Friday after school. It reminded me of his new shampoo… and how… how soft his skin had felt when I-

My mind forced itself to not go there.

To stay grounded here in the present because going there would start making me feel things that I had no business feeling while at Isiah’s with his mum. I was hoping I’d get to see Nick, too, at some point, but it sounded like he had to make the drive up to his sisters, Isiah’s aunt. Something about clearing out some storage unit, however Sheila would probably explain it more over dinner.

I tried everything in my power to distract myself. To think of anything and everything… yet the way his shampoo smelled was making my head feel like it was bombarded with an inebriating gas. I tried not to think of the warmth I could feel below my fingertips as my practically trembling hands fumbled at the clasp on the back of his neck… or how I saw him shiver slightly with each moment my hands accidentally brushed against skin instead of metal.

I tried not to think of any of this… but it was no fucking use.

“H-How does it feel?” I whispered quickly, thinking perhaps it was too heavy. “I know the chain is pretty thick, and the cross pendant might be-”

“Shhh,” Isiah whispered lightly. “It feels perfect .”

I found myself taking one rather abrupt massive step back as soon as I felt myself wanting to get closer. Thankfully for me, Isiah had actually started to move closer to the large mirror he had hanging behind his bedroom door, checking out the pendant itself with as much attention he had given it before, if not more. And the smile on his lips was what I was choosing to blame for beckoning myself just a little closer to see my gift hanging around this handsome guy’s neck.

His fingers gently glided across the metal, yet it was his next question that made my body grow heated as I studied every inch of him through the long mirror we were both standing in front of, with me still positioned behind him.

“Do you like it?” He asked in that same quieter tone. I could hear the slight sounds of his mother singing from the kitchen which let me know that even if for a moment, this moment was just for Isiah and I… and yet my nerves still got the better of me as I tried to ride a bolder streak.

“Yeah,” my head slowly nodded, watching Isiah as his hazel-green eyes settled on my lighter ones. “Yeah,” I nodded again at all of him. “I…” my hands slowly lifted themselves from my side, wrapping around Isiah’s shoulder to his chest so I could gently straighten the pendant. “I like it- you wearing it.”

Everything about that had meant to sound genuine and perhaps a little playful… but my breathing was far from fucking normal when I found my fingers refusing to pull away from the pendant, and subsequently, his chest. They instead lingered there as I felt the quick rise and fall of his chest itself. It took Isiah nothing for him to notice, as his eyes quickly fell from mine to the fingers I had gently placed on him, and they kept near the pendant with hopes that they wouldn’t move further.

“… Isiah?” I whispered quietly to him. His eyes found mine again, but I could feel it- him leaning just a tad bit more into me again.

“Y-Yeah?” I heard his voice reply, mirroring the uneven tone in my own. My fingers had started to rub gently across the metal of the cross, still touching the firmness of his chest above his cotton shirt.

“Is… is tonight… is this like… like w-would you say it’s like… like a um, a date?” I asked with barely a whisper at this point. My face had already long since revealed just how fucking flustered I was for even asking this insane question, and the look Isiah gave me helped nothing.

“I-I-It ca- I-I mean, like, would you, um… would you like it to- I mean like, would you be okay with that? I mean, there’s no-”

I nodded so damn quickly it felt like I pulled something in my neck at the sudden response. I knew I was close- too close

• close enough where his body could remind me yet again how easy it was for me to lose myself in him… and yet I drew closer. My head started to dip a bit lower as I watched us through this mirror, unable to look away.

Isiah just- he looked so goddamn perfect right now, I-

“ I want that ,“ I murmured lightly, and Isiah released a sudden shiver that made me do something I probably shouldn’t have.

I started to pull Isiah a bit closer to me by placing more on his chest.. and when his body began to damn near melt into the front of mine, my soul practically ascended.

“If…” my voice tried it yet again, but I sounded like a fucking choppy mess. His scent had long since made me contemplate doing things that went entirely against the plans for this evening, but the open bedroom door told me to get it together. “If I were to.. t-to take more… liberties tonight-”

“I-I-I want that.” Isiah rushed out quickly. Too quickly in fact that he found himself immediately correcting his choice of words. “L-Like I mean, like if you want that then I… uh… like I want to let you know that it’s okay… if you, you know, want to…”

His words were as hesitant and unknowing as mine… and when I felt it, his body pushing back against a part of me that had reacted far more strongly to the feel of him… my mind was quickly met at a crossroads.

On one hand, I could’ve tried to pull away. There was a whole part of me that told myself to take it slow- to really understand the weight of my choices and what I wanted as opposed to what would be better for something so… new … yet there was another part of me that wanted to just say fuck it.

And that part was currently beating out any voice of reason.

“I… I wanted to take things a bit… slow,” I whispered, dipping my head lower near his right ear. Isiah was beginning to shake slightly against me and I knew I was just about ready to close that fucking bedroom door. Even for just a second or two… I wanted him completely to myself.

I wanted to see exactly what things he and I could work out. Together.

My nose gently brushed against the edge of his ear, submitting to his warm and familiarity. He was starting to push against me of his own accord, and if he hadn’t felt it already… he now had a bit of a front row viewing of the way my body was starting to react to his closeness. I had tried everything to shut this part of me down, because even now it went against everything I had said about taking things slow when I felt myself getting so unbelievably turned on…

This part of me wanted more than just slow.

And yet my greatest worry was that I would overdo it. That I wouldn’t know what the hell I was doing at all, really.

Because I didn’t.

The way Isiah reacted, however, made me believe that I might’ve been doing something right, because his hands shot up to mine still on my chest. “D-D-Dylan,” he jutted out raspy. “I-If you d-don’t feel comforta-”

He didn’t even finish that sentence before I started doing something that very soon altered every bit of this dynamic between us.

My lips gently brushed against that soft skin of his and they slowly connected to the spot right behind his ear.

And Isiah completely unraveled after that.

“Sh-Sh-Sh-Shit-” he murmured, pushing back more deliberately against me while my lips slowly caressed his skin. I felt it- his head tilting further to allow me more access to him as his hands gripped mine with far more strength than I expected. Both my hands held him just a firmly, feeling his heartbeat pounding beneath his chest to a rhythm that mimicked my own. His breaths became far more shallower, and when I then heard the faintest sounds of a groan slip past his own lips while my kisses got rougher, I knew I couldn’t hold out anymore.

I wanted more.

My hands slowly pushed out of his, past his chest before moving lower. He and I didn’t have a whole lot of time, yet the feeling of his body jolting when my tongue delicately slipped past my lips to taste more of him, made me unable to fucking stop.

The way my hands slid down his body was all too deliberate. I had never felt him like this before, and the way his body felt so solid was starting to make my mind incoherent. Feeling him shaking just as much as I was…

“W-Will you-… w-will you c-close y-your bedroom do-”

“Yes,” Isiah replied lightning fast as if he felt this inescapable pull that was just begging me to do more. I didn’t even really know what more entailed, but Isiah seemed to trust me.

My only issue came with the sound of both our names being called. And from that voice alone, I forced myself to pull away from Isiah in a quick rush.

We were being called to the living room to keep Isiah’s mum company… yet I couldn’t help but almost mourn this- him . The added aspect of romance was what was weakening my ability to act anywhere near appropriately, and my mind knew it too.

It just kept reminding me of how he felt. How he might soon feel again- that in a few hours, I would be alone in a darkened theatre with him.

On a date, no less.

••

23. Let There Be Blood

More unedited chaps

But enjoy lovelies!

I’m getting around to getting my shit together lol

xoxo

Isiah

“So what were we thinking for college?”

“ Mum ,“ I groaned immediately at the dining table.

“I’m just asking!” She insisted as she brought plates to the table itself, one after the other. She forced Dylan and I to remain seated while she carried everything out, refusing any of our help even though we insisted… but what I was far more invested in was the foot Dylan had stretched out from under the table to touch mine while we remained sitting.

I was already preoccupied with readjusting my jeans every three seconds because I couldn’t for the life of me get over what Dylan had done in my bedroom. How… how he had…

“Still in the works, Mrs. Jacobs, but once I get it figured out, you’ll be the first to know which college I choose.”

“ Second ,“ I cut in immediately. “You’ll be the second . I’ll be the first to know.”

Dylan nudged my foot playfully with his as he replied “ she’s the one plating the meatloaf .“

He reminded me of that in a matter of fact way. “Had I known that’s all it took to lock in a seat as your number one, I’d be up there plating the meatloaf.” I argued with Dylan in an almost whisper, as both my feet locked around his by his ankle. The grin that spread across Dylan’s lips made me think yet again to when I fucking felt it-… his lips on my skin.

If my mother hadn’t called us into the dining room, I would’ve had that bedroom door locked so damn fast. As soon as he fucking asked, I was already ready to pull the black hoodie he was wearing, right off of him, and bring those lips of his down to my own.

Honestly I was just about to push dinner off as long as we could to see exactly what else Dylan might… might like.

My face got redder at just the thought of it. Of feeling more of him. Whenever my hands moved to the pendant hanging from my neck- a gift Dylan had no business getting and yet probably the best birthday gift I had received in years- all I could think about was his hands gently touching my chest.

All I could feel was his deep breathes lightly fanning my ear and neck.

Fuck , that sturdy chest that made me push myself even further into him without me realizing.

And I could feel it to.

A part of him that was far more hard than I could’ve possibly thought. And bigger . Much, much fucking bigger.

That was when I knew I had to lock that door.

Something I would’ve done right then and there had we not been interrupted. But dinner would come and go, then my mum would get ready for work since she always got called in when she wa on call, and Dylan and I would head to the movie theatre.

Then he and I would finally be alone together.

“Don’t forget I also made creamy mash,” my mum added as she brought the loaded serving bowl filled to the brim with mashed potatoes, to the table.

Dylan gestured to the food before giving me a shrug that had us both cracking up. I knew it was hard to compete with a whole ass meal made by my mother, but I still gave it a go. Even if Dylan was joking, which he was because there was no way I wouldn’t be the first to hear about the college he picks, I still didn’t like my mother even slightly believing she’d know first.

Dylan and I had been talking about college literally since we were ten.

“I’m sure the scouters are already out and hot on your trail, Dylan,” my mum sung praises as she finally set some cranberry juice down in front of Dylan and myself before she took her own seat with a glass of poured wine.

“Well, sort of. I think it would be cool if Isiah and I stayed close though…” Dylan’s voice trailed off as he looked back over at me. I was trying to do everything in my power to act fucking normal, especially around my mum, but I’m sure whatever look I gave Dylan must not’ve been the most innocent because the way his face got redder had then forced me to look away completely.

My mum, however, had busied herself with putting some salad on everyone’s plate to start the meal and Dylan and I quickly dug in to distract ourselves as she went over some good local options.

There was simply no denying it.

After dinner, Dylan looked about ready to propose to my mother.

In total, we had three servings each of the creamy mash and the meatloaf, a meal my mother had doubled the recipe of because I had informed her of just how big Dylan had gotten over the last year. She didn’t fully believe me until she saw the guy in her doorway, about the size of Don now.

Dylan held his overbearing emotions at bay, trying to convince both himself and I that he was emotionally prepared for this meal which he wasn’t. I loved the over dramatics however, and welcomed them with open arms.

My mum did in fact get called in which was no surprise there, so while Dylan’s and I cleaned up the kitchen and washed the dishes, she got ready for work.

I had checked the showtimes for the movie Dylan wanted to see, and the latest showtime was for 9:30PM, which was some good timing considering my mum was expected to be out of here by 8:45PM at the latest. Dylan and I still pulled out all our school stuff to at least sell the idea that we would be working hard all evening.

And we did genuinely work on a few things up until my mother headed out the door, telling me to call her if I need anything all while opening our home to Dylan for as long as he wanted to say, granted his father gave him the ok which was something we were working on while sitting in my living room. Dylan had already texted his dad to say he’d be home by midnight, so that’s the time we were shooting for even though he didn’t get a response from Don.

My mum eventually said the last of her goodbyes and left us, which had Dylan and I quickly scrambling to our feet.

“Is your sweatshirt and sweatpants warm enough?” I asked him once we rushed to my room to get ready to leave. Luckily it was only about a five to ten minute walk but I still wanted to make sure he was ready to the chilly autumn night. It was also my birthday present to him, and I wanted to make especially sure that he was comfortable.

“Yeah, I should be fine,” Dylan assured me as he gathered his wallet from his backpack and pulled his hair back into the hood of his sweater that he flipped up.

I felt my movements fucking slow as I took in yet again just how fucking hot he was in something so casual. I couldn’t remember the last time I ever saw him in just a sweatshirt and sweats, however I could tell that he was relaxed. Very relaxed actually, which was what made me even more excited to get us moving. We hadn’t seen a movie together in ages.

… Let There Be Blood.

A choice that was solid for Dylan, yet it was still a choice I dreaded. Dylan must’ve picked up on my hesitancy as I soon led us out of my apartment and got the door locked before heading down to the main lobby, because he did his best to keep me distracted.

“So let’s make sure we’re on the same page about buying candy at the corner store before making it to the theatre,” this handsome guy offered up.

“Yes,” I nodded quickly, “no way in hell are we paying movie theatre prices for snacks. The only thing worth a damn is their popcorn and we can share a massive bucket, but milk duds must be mixed in.”

“Agreed, agreed, agreed,” Dylan nodded, allowing me to guide us down all the steps, then out the lobby doors to the busy streets of New York City. First stop was the bodega just a block and a half away then we’d make our way to the theatre. Honestly, this side of town was never the safest, and while I did keep a switchblade in my pocket whenever I decided to walk to certain places, I noticed that Dylan’s height really did wonders to keep people away from the side block we started on…

Even if he was just a lovable giant teddy bear.

From the outside looking in, he had a bit of a resting bitch face that mirrored Don’s, unless he looked my way. That was when I noticed his features would soften, making me feel like literal putty.

What warmed my heart the most, however, was when Dylan recognized the store owner of the bodega almost immediately once we entered.

“Ali!” He grinned ear to ear, and Ali didn’t waste a moment navigating his way around the bulletproof encasement he rang people up from, to come around and give us a hug.

“You’re back!” The shorter and older man exclaimed as he pulled us in tight, giving Dylan one more hug for good measure.

“Yeah!” Dylan’s nodded quickly, grinning even wider as Ali pulled away. “Only been back for about a week, but Isiah and I are catching a movie soon and thought we’d stop by.”

“As per tradition,” Ali nodded immediately. “You pick out whatever you’d like. It’s on the house tonight.”

“Oh you don’t have to-” I tried to get out, but Ali quickly shook his head.

“I just like to see some familiar faces every once in a while. Pick out what you’d like and come check out then be on your way. It’s getting late.”

And Ali’s words were final. In addition to the milk duds and hot tamales we picked out, Ali also made us each a ham and Swiss which we felt guilty for accepting since we both had just greedily scarfed down dinner… but the sheer scent alone had Dylan and I snatching those croissant sandwiches so quickly that the guilt only manifested for a moment or two.

Ali even threw in some Arizona teas which Dylan and I figured out just how deep his sweatpants pockets were for us to hide everything. I had kept my jeans on from my outfit at school, but I pulled a hoodie on myself before we left my place to give us more pockets, and once we made it past the bodega to the movie theatre, I was grateful that it was busy for a Friday night.

It put less eyes on Dylan and I.

Once I printed out the tickets I had already bought online at one of the kiosks, it didn’t take much work to find the theatre we were assigned to, and that was after I made sure to pick up the largest popcorn bucket available through concessions.

The theatre I chose while online was the least filled one because I wasn’t really trying to sit in a space so over-congested, yet I made sure I chose seats right in the middle. That was where Dylan liked to sit- not too close to the main screen but not too far from it either.

We first found our seats, then made sure to get our surrounding area comfortable. I liked to sit one row above the break in sections between the seats behind and in front, allowing us quick access to the exits. It was just something that made both Dylan and myself far more comfortable. Especially during horror movies for me in particular.

“Thank you for this,” Dylan whispered as he leant a little further towards me. He was working on opening the hot tamales while I was pouring the milk duds into the popcorn.

“Thank you for coming,” I replied quickly with a smile. “And if this gives me nightmares for the indefinite future, so be it I guess .”

“I’ll make sure you leave this place feeling supported,” Dylan insisted which made me chuckle lightly. The lighting inside the theatre was starting to dim some as the trailers geared up to begin playing at any moment, and Dylan and I made sure to recline or seats some as we got ready to dive into movie itself.

If it wasn’t for Dylan pushing the middle armrest up to minimize the amount of shit between our sitting selves, I would’ve probably walked out of this movie theatre about half an hour ago.

It was most definitely horror leaning, with a whole lot of jump scares and gore. I was doing my best to act unaffected but there was a point during the film where I couldn’t help myself. Where I had to take a moment to look away. My gaze quickly found Dylan’s who was sitting on my left for a change. My body went rigid from the silence I knew came right before a jump scare, but Dylan quickly reached over for the one thing I had kept between us.

My hand.

I honestly hated every bit of this creepy as shit scene, yet the feeling of his fingers as they slowly linked, lacing with my own with them sliding between the open spaces of my fingers, and the warmth he brought me just by his skin touching my own alone, reminded me of more inevitable facts.

Like the fact that I had no thoughts of letting go of this hand any time soon, regardless of whether I did or didn’t get over my own fear of horrors.

Instead, my eyes were kept on Dylan for a good long fucking while while he pulled my hand over into his lap, still keeping them laced. I tried to lower the rate of my now laboured breaths but there was no part of me that didn’t react to the way he started to lightly stroke my laced fingers with his- his touch was so fucking gentle.

He was driving me utterly insane , to the point where whatever was happening in this damn movie was as similar a mystery to me as it was to me before I even started watching the damn thing. I tried to focus on the film again, especially after whatever scary scene had eventually passed, but as soon as I felt my hand being raised before Dylan’s soft, warm lips grazed the back of it, I fucking gave up so damn quick as I turned to him again.

His eyes agreeably turned from the massive screen in front of us to look at me, and at this point, there was no hiding how I looked at him as my eyes slowly dropped to my hand still in his. If it wasn’t for yet another scary scene I could feel coming on, I would’ve acted far more nonchalantly. That eerie silence was what forced my eyelids closed again, anticipating another jump scare, but when I felt Dylan bring the back of my hand to his lips again, my eyes flew open at the intense feeling.

He was watching me, more intently now once his lips slowly separated from my skin… and I found myself forced to readjust my jeans around the crotch area immediately, unable to control how my body was getting now. He wasn’t just distracting me anymore- he was turning me the almighty fuck on, and I didn’t know how to dial this all down.

“D-Dyl,” I tried to stutter out, but the sound of something loud jumping on the screen forced my fingers to lace with his harder, as I practically curled my body into him.

I had felt myself getting too close with my eyes shutting tight… but it was the feeling of Dylan as his free hand grazed against my chin and tilted my head to the left of him slightly so he could lean forward to whisper something into my ear, which threw whatever stability I barely had left in me, off completely.

“D-Do you… do you w-want to stay… or go?” He whispered into my left ear… and the way my body reacted to him so swiftly brought me immediate, copious amounts of fucking shame while I shivered from that fucking alone.

I knew he was giving me a safe out… but his tone held such suggestive notes and I had no fucking clue how I was going to insist we stay.

I wanted us to go. I wanted as much time as possible with him alone… but I also wanted us to celebrate his birthday. I wanted him to get to see the end of this damn movie, because I know he was interested in at least witnessing how it ended.

And so, against all better judgement- everything my body was screaming from the rooftops for- for more time with Dylan… I slowly shook my head no. “Only about an hour left,” I whispered back gently. “I’ll be okay.”

I had said those words to assure him, but it was more so self-assuring.

And perhaps it was this sacrifice I was willing to make which would soon grant me more time with Dylan once we finally got back to my apartment.

Time that would alter things between us once again, somewhat revealing what it might’ve been that Dylan wanted to push the boundaries of in regards to taking a few liberties.

A sacrifice I would soon be rewarded for, believe it or not.

My hand never actually left Dylan’s after the movie.

Not when the movie finally ended.

Not when the lights finally turn on after the movie. Not even after he led us out of the theatre itself, guiding me towards the entrance to the building after having tossed our empty popcorn bucket into the trash along with both our empty cans of Arizona.

He kept my hand tightly in his, and I made no gesture to pull away as his black hoodie was the only thing I focused on while I followed him out. We were walking so damn fast, I felt like I was the tin cans flailing around on the back of a car with a ‘Just Married’ sign.

“D-Dyl-” I tried to start, chuckling softly when he kept us in a single line to get through the evening sidewalk congestion quickly. “W-What…. W-What are we-”

“L-Let’s go back to yours for a bit,” Dylan insisted quickly, which raised my eyebrows some.

“Like r-right now?” I asked him, and Dylan nodded quickly, creating some space beside him for me to walk next to him. He was still holding my hand tightly in his, unwilling to let go.

“Yeah,” I watched him nod as he turned to look at me. “Yeah l-like right now… if that okay?”

“Y-Yeah,” I nodded quickly. I hadn’t been anticipating this at all . “Yeah, th-that’s… that’s okay.”

••

24. O Is For The Only One I See

We are editing today you have my word lol

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Warning: Explicit Content (kinda sorta, you be the judge lol. Next chapter with probably be a whole chapter of spice so I’ll be getting Inkitt and Substack updated for that)

Dylan

I was rushing him.

I know I was rushing him, and still…

Still, I couldn’t quite stop myself. I kept Isiah’s hand locked in mine the entire time we walked back, unwilling to let go of him for any bit of the way. I wanted us… alone .

Now .

And Isiah didn’t protest it a single moment. He just doubled up his steps for each massive one I took with my long strides.

My dad hadn’t exactly given me the okay to stay longer, but the movie had ended close to midnight and if luck was on my side, the man was sleeping by now, completely forgetting what time I was coming home at all.

If he was still up, maybe he was just enjoying having the place to himself with Carson. I was more than okay missing out on whatever those two had going on right about now if they were up.

Instead, I was planning on taking advantage of being alone with Isiah. I… I didn’t have to worry about being interrupted. Honestly I might’ve been able to get away with ignoring all my dad’s calls if one came in, and just use the excuse that I fell asleep here at some point.

That always seemed to do the trick when Isiah and I were younger.

What we weren’t expecting as we safely made it into Isiah’s building and took his steps two at a time to reach his second floor quicker, was the rather cool gust of wind that welcomed us as soon as he slid his key into the lock and got it open.

“Shit, it’s freezing in here. Let me check the thermostat quick,” Isiah spoke. I rather reluctantly let go of that hand of his now that we had made it back and I guess he might’ve needed both hands to figure out the thermostat, so I instead packed up most of my school work from the living room’s coffee table and brought everything to Isiah’s bedroom.

The whole home was pretty chilly, but I didn’t mind. I just found a few extra blankets from the cupboard near Isiah’s room since this building’s heat was always a hit or miss, and placed those on his bed.

Then I got myself comfortable. With my thick grey sweats and this black hoodie, the blankets just made the temperature perfect, and the defeated look in Isiah’s eyes as he joined me in his room let me know that the blankets would be a more permanent option for the night.

“Sorry, I’ll probably have to call the property manager in the morning.” He spoke as he pulled off his leather jacket and rummaged through his open closet on my right to find himself a hoodie. “If you get too cold and want to head home, that’s totally fi-” Isiah started, but I quickly cut him off as he turned back to me.

“The blankets are perfect,” I told him quickly, plus this… this would just mean that we could- “c-come… come here ,” I then added a bit more quietly as my hand lifted the cover some for him to join me.

And Isiah only hesitated for a second before he quickly pulled the hoodie on and grabbed the tv remote from him bedside table, then climbed onto the bed. He looked like he was about to sit at my side, but I quickly pulled him down, having us both lay on our side the length of his bed while he fumbled with the remote.

“M-M-Maybe we- we sh-shouldn’t- maybe we should sit-” Isiah started but I stopped him.

“Th-This is… better,” I mumbled softly as I covered Isiah with the blankets while my arms simultaneously pulled him a bit closer to me. Fuck, he smelt so fucking good. I tried to leave some space between the back of him and the front of me, especially with him now this close- with his scent fucking everywhere including his pillows and duvet…

Space was good right about now. Really fucking good.

Isiah entire body felt pretty rigid, too, and so I tried to give him more space. I hadn’t meant to make him uncomfortable… but as soon as I started to shift away a bit more, I felt a hand quickly reach behind to grab mine. “M-Maybe…” Isiah started, pulling up gently on my right hand until it comfortably rested over his right upper arm. “M-Maybe just for a bit… I… I just don’t want to fall asleep.”

“I-It’s okay if you do,” I whispered to him, feeling as his body started to relax itself more next to me. He had started to… to shift himself a bit closer… and into that- that space I had created. The one that was pretty fucking necessary right now since even the slightest thought of Isiah pressed up against me was making my entire body fucking heated.

I… I needed that space back.

“Isi-” I started, however he said something at the exact same time that ended up overruling my barely voiced request.

“What should we watch?” He asked me.

And I honestly had no fucking clue. It was safe to say that I barely paid attention to the movie we had just watched. My mind was still on the fucking way Isiah looked at me when I brought the back of his hand to my lips.

I wanted to leave the theatre right there and then, but I didn’t want to interrupt his birthday gift to me. And having the length of that entire movie to pep talk myself into holding Isiah’s hand until we made it back to his apartment, along with me asking if I could stay a little longer, was absolutely needed.

“Are we thinking something good, or something… something we might not really… like pay much attention to-”

“The- the um… the latter.” Isiah answered quickly, and this time it was me who went against the need for some fucking space, because the slight shiver that cut through Isiah drew me closer almost fucking immediately. My arm was rested over his, and I could feel him start to type something out with his tv remote.

I knew he really must’ve not given a shit what movie we watched because he selected the first thing that was available on Netflix. Alita: Battle Angel was what started playing seconds later which gathered my attention a moment

“I don’t think I’ve even seen this movie all the way through once,” Isiah mumbled. His voice had gotten softer, just urging me to get a bit closer… and I had no control over it anymore. Instead I found myself shifting a bit more, holding him a bit tighter, but as I felt a part of me react more than it fucking needed to right now, I made sure to keep it as far from him as fucking possible.

I wanted him flush against me… but I didn’t want him to feel this. It was already fucking embarrassing how easily he made me hard. And I didn’t want him to think that this was all I thought about either… technically it was only about fifty percent, while the other forty was simply the thought of him, and about ten percent was allocated to schoolwork.

“That makes two of us,” I more or less murmured near the nape of Isiah’s neck, and when I felt him push back a bit, pressing his ass up unexpectedly against my hard as shit dick, I inhaled so goddamn sharply it made Isiah jolt a bit before he shivered hard yet again.

Jesus fucking Christ-

“I-I-I… I’m so s-sorry- I-I didn’t realize-” Isiah stammered quietly as he shifted again to put a bit more space between us. My breaths were now a laboured fucking mess, and I was trying everything in my power not to grab Isiah’s arm tight as a reaction. For every deep breath that fanned Isiah’s skin, I could feel him practically tremble against me.

“I-It’s o-okay-” I tried to croak out. “I-I just- I just need like a second…” I tried to explain, which Isiah slowly nodded, pressing some of his soft curls against my face as he did, and I couldn’t help but deeply inhale that new shampoo scent.

Honestly, I knew what I had said was a fucking lie, but I wasn’t expecting to react this uncontrollably . All it did was add to my already wired nerves that Isiah and I were now finally alone… and I might’ve not put a whole lot of thought into the fact that we were taking things slow in the first place because I still didn’t know what the fuck I was doing.

I… I wanted to kiss him… but the only time I had ever felt lips against mine before was when he kissed me .

Hell, what if I was a horrendous kisser? I could’ve very well been.

It wasn’t like I had any prior experiences considering the kiss Isiah had given me was the briefest of pecks. It was so quick and he had left so fast that honestly it took me a minute to register he had even kissed me on that couch.

One minute, Isiah had had his head resting in my lap on the suede couch and our focus was on the mounted tv above the fireplace At least that was where I thought it was… until I heard Isiah whisper my name softly that night. That was when I tilted my head to look down at him… and I was met with Isiah lifting his head up from my lap to unexpectedly bring his lips to mine.

I was so fucking taken aback, I didn’t react with enough time. Or like at all. Not when he sprung to his feet from the couch, mumbled a quick, rushed apology, then grabbed his school bag and bolted out of there. By the time I ran out into the hallway to try and stop him, Isiah was already gone. He had taken the back stairwell.

And from that night, he didn’t answer any texts or calls. He just shut me out.

Now you can do it right, my brain reminded me as it practically begged me to stop being so hung up on the first kiss and start figuring out how to do it again. I couldn’t even tell how in my head I had gotten about all this, but I decided I’d just bite the bullet and full on ask if I could kiss Isiah… only to hear the softness of his breaths. Then when I managed to sit up slightly so I could see more of him, I noticed his long eyelashes lying gently against his under-eyes.

He had dozed off at some point, all while I was over-psyching myself out about kissing him.

Jesus fucking Christ, I was a mess.

I didn’t dare wake him up, though. I knew he was waking up earlier this week to meet me at my locker, and while I knew the right thing was to tell him to sleep in more… yet there was a part of me- a massive part- that fucking loved it. Seeing him leaning against my locker with his leather jacket and backpack slung over his shoulder, only for a largest smile to spread quickly across his lips.

It made my heart beat like I had just ran all the way to school instead of driving myself.

I was disappointed in me now, though. Perhaps for missing the only opportunity we might’ve had to do more. I wished that I could act as calm as I did before that first kiss, when things were different.. yet I also didn’t quite want that either. It was the way my body reacted now that reminded me of just how much I… liked Isiah.

Liked , I reminded myself again, refusing to take things further than that in hopes that my body’s internal temperature would go back to normal.

And it probably would’ve if I didn’t have the dream I had… or subsequently did the things I did right after it.

At night, I dreamt about what I would’ve done if I had the balls to make a move before Isiah fell asleep. If I had taken the opportunity to do more. I dreamt about him still lying in my arms, yet this time, my right arm was wrapped around his waist, holding him tighter to me. There was no space between us anymore.

“Sh-Shit,” I found myself muttering during this dream as I felt Isiah’s soft yet firm ass pressed right the hell up against me. Isiah was releasing the softest fucking moans while his hand held mine just as tight, almost begging me to ask him for more.

I couldn’t stop myself from nuzzling my nose deeper into the crook of his neck, feeling his hand tighten around mine even more. I knew it was a dream- it had to be because I had started to slowly grind my cock harder against his ass through these sweatpants, not giving a single fuck about just how hard I was…

Until I felt Isiah’s hand start to lightly shake mine, nudging me.

“D-Dylan- sh-sh-shit , Dylan-” Isiah’s voice spoke, but it was a disheveled mess, and sounded far more strained than it did just a second ago. Once I felt his hand tighten around my wrist, my eyes finally flew the fuck open.

It… it wasn’t a dream.

Well, I mean, like it was but it also wasn’t .

Sh-Shit!

For starters, my arm wasn’t around Isiah’s shoulder. It was around his waist, holding the man firmly against me. And I wasn’t just pressing my hard on against his ass… I had been somewhat grinding my lower half into him.

The speed in which I separated myself right then and there almost sent me into the wall that Isiah’ bed was up against. I quickly brought myself onto my knees, putting even more fucking space between us, but as Isiah scrambled to sit up in bed himself, I noticed him eyeing the one place I couldn’t exactly hide from him.

“I-I-… I-I’m so sorry-” I tried to rush out as the immediate shame of what the fuck I was just doing, damn near suffocated me now. My hand still tried to pull the edge of my hoodie down lower to try and cover myself. My dick was almost painfully hard at this point.

“I-I-It- It’s- y-you’re-” Isiah mumbled as he tried to get his own heavier breaths under control. I… I still couldn’t believe that I-

“I- I’m going to go piss quick. I-I’ll be right back,” I rushed out fully before climbing off Isiah’s bed. I wasn’t even sure if I sounded anywhere near convincing, but I had been… close with what I was doing , for lack of a better word. I needed to… to finish somewhere, to try and get this out of my system before I even attempted to go back to lie down next to Isiah.

I wasn’t even sure how the hell I was going to face him again , I thought as I quickly rushed down Isiah’s hallway to his bathroom, and shut the door safely behind me before I locked it.

That was so fucking embarrassing.

I was so fucking embarrassing, good lord.

Isiah probably felt so goddamn violated… and the way I had just told myself that I wouldn’t wake him up. That I would hold off… just to do all that now?

“ Fuck !“ I muttered quietly as my eyes adjusted to the bathroom’s warm lights. I was a mess. And as soon as I caught sight of my bright red face… I knew I probably looked like a deer caught in headlights once Isiah got a good look at me while on his bed. My hard dick didn’t even try to hide itself, plus with how tight I had it pressed against Isiah’s ass, there was literally no going back now. He had felt it… how turned on I was.

My hand pushed past my tied drawstring, for me to release myself, pulling my dick out from my briefs. I didn’t really jerk off all that often, and doing it in Isiah’s bathroom just felt so fucking wrong, but it was genuinely my only option.

So my hand wrapped around my length, and I tried to get myself off quickly, not even thinking for a second that however embarrassed I felt now was just about to get a whole lot more worse for me.

••

25. We Skipped A Few Steps

Warning: Explicit Content

(I kept this chapter pretty light so imma take the risk and post it here too. Edited chapter is on Substack already and I think I’ll start getting more explicit there then kinda keep things more moderate here. Inkitt will be updated once I’m back home (celebrated my bday at my mommas this weekend))

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Isiah

Jesus fucking Christ.

I had not been expecting this- to be woken up like that.

I had stirred awake somewhat when I felt Dylan’s arm shift lower around my right shoulder, the warmth of it following as he slid it lower to wrap around the right side of my waist. And I had tried so damn hard to remain completely still, doing everything in my damn power not to stir him awake.

His warmth however had my body relaxing into him almost immediately as soon as I felt him pull me closer.

Fuck , he felt so goddamn good. The closer he slowly pulled me into him, the more I felt his warm, soft breaths start to fan the back of my neck, sending my body into even more of a spiral as an insane amount of heat traveled through every damn bit of it.

I can do this , I thought to myself.

I can do this.

Just go back to bed, Isiah.

Just… just go… go back to

My mind just about shut off once I felt it. Him .

He had successfully pulled my entire body completely into his, forcing me to feel something that sent even more heat through my whole being. I felt it- the hardness of his dick as he started to press it tightly against my ass, and my breathing hitched tremendously.

Sh-Shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit shit-

My body was reacting faster than my damn brain could as my own heart rate fully sped up. I had no fucking idea what I was supposed to do, and I was pretty sure Dylan was still sleeping through all this.

His breaths were deeper but steady… even as his large hand held me at my waist above my shirt even more firmly, forcing chills through me that made me take even deeper breaths myself to control just how fucking turned on I was getting.

Any lower and Dylan would be brushing up against the damn thing pressed tight to the right side of my crotch, now starting to with more need than I was capable of controlling.

“D-Dylan?” My voice came out as more of a wrecked stutter. My voice sounded like I hadn’t spoken a lick of English in literal years. I didn’t want to wake him… but this was now way too fucking much. His hand on my hip, pushing his own hard cock into me, was exceeding all my limits.

And those fucking breaths on the back of my neck? I couldn’t stop shivering.

“D-Dylan- sh-sh-shit , Dylan-” I tried again, yet it was a disheveled fucking mess, and sounded far more strained than it did just a second ago. I had refrained from touching him, however my hand quickly reached for Dylan’s wrist as soon as I felt him start to lower his touch.

He… he was dangerously fucking close now- too close. He had to stop, otherwise I… I might accidentally-

By sheer luck alone, Dylan seemed to start coming to, as those slow, deliberate thrusts into my ass slowed to a sudden, abrupt stop.

Then I felt Dylan practically fling himself across the bed as he took the sharpest inhale. He sat himself up in my bed, sitting back on his knees and putting even more fucking space between us, I sort of scrambled to sit up in bed myself, especially once I got a good look at him through the dim bedside lamp I had on, and thanks to said light, I got the most clearest view of Dylan’s… imprint, pushing into the fabric of his grey sweatpants.

“I-I-… I-I’m so sorry-” he tried to rush out as the supposed immediate shame of he had started doing then seemingly suffocated him now. I watched him try to pull the hem of his hoodie down to try and cover himself more once he figured what it was my eyes fixated on. My dick was almost painfully hard at this point, pushing against the jeans fabric.

“I-I-It- It’s- y-you’re-” I mumbled incoherently as I tried to get my own heavy breaths under control. I… I still couldn’t believe that he… that he had… that I was going to-

“I- I’m going to go piss quick. I-I’ll be right back,” Dylan rushed out fully before quickly climbing off my bed as a whole and pretty much darting out of my room.

I hadn’t even had the time to get anything else out. I didn’t really know how the hell to gather myself in enough time before Dylan bolted, and as he headed down the hallway, seemingly entering the bathroom before I heard the door shut, I just forced myself up in bed more.

He… had…

Every part of me felt like it was on fire regardless of how desperately I mentally screamed at it to get it the hell together. And my pleas were accompanied soon by others when my mind betrayed me.

When I… well, when I started to think of what Dylan might be… doing…

Isiah, just stay in bed, I practically begged myself.

Stay… in-

My hands gently pushed back the many blankets that Dylan and I were once fully submerged in to quickly pull myself to my feet. I had told myself that I was just going to go check on him- nothing more. He had seemed so freaked out and the way he had woken me up left my with no room to assure him that it was okay.

That what he had done was-… well, that it was ok- that I… liked it. Clearly.

I didn’t want him to feel embarrassed by it, which judging by the look he gave me once he pulled away, he absolutely felt that way.

I walked out quietly into the dark corridor, easily noticing the light that was shining through from under the door to the bathroom, and I could hear the water running from the tap. As I got closer to the door, my right hand raised itself to give the door a knock, but it froze in mid air once I heard a muffled sound from just behind the door.

That sound made my whole body freeze up, unsure of how the hell to process it. What I had just heard.

It felt like I had only just calmed my body down enough to get ahold of my own heart beat… but as I shifted closer to the door, leaning against the frame to hear better, I pretty soon heard just what the running water had been somewhat concealing.

Those soft yet deep groans from Dylan.

I took the shakiest of fucking breaths as the sounds he made sent this body of mine right back into overdrive. My mind was starting to spiral, and the part of my body that had also seemingly started to settle, was now pooling with straight heat and fucking desire.

I turned myself slightly to lean my back against the frame as I heard with deep moans grow a bit louder, those heavy breaths unable to mix in with the sound of the running water.

“Sh-shit-” I heard him mutter quietly, causing my body to jolt from the unexpected shiver which ran through seemingly every damn nerve ending I had. My weight pressed my back further against that frame as my hands started to shake.

This is wrong , I couldn’t help but think. This is so fucking wrong. I… I shouldn’t be

“F-Fuck-” Dylan groaned this time, and the deep mess of his voice voiced a shaking hand from my side to the top button of my jeans, while my other hand brought itself to my mouth. I couldn’t stop myself from quickly undoing that button, then zipping down those jeans. I could hold back- not when… not when Dylan sounded so fucking…

My hand worked overtime to muffle my deep, long groan as soon as my hand pushed past the thin fabric of my slightly dampened briefs and wrapped themselves around my hard dick, just begging for a release of some kind.

This is so fucking wrong , I told myself yet again, really trying to hammer the words into my thick fucking skull, but there was no stopping it once I started to pump my cock, forcing my head back against the frame as that immediate pleasure begged me for more.

The running water brought a false sense of security that Dylan wouldn’t hear me, but my hands remained almost sealed around my mouth, working to muffle my own groans further as my hand squeezed tight as it slid from the base of me right up to my tip, my ears listening closely to every fucking unadulterated moan to fall from Dylan.

I couldn’t help but imagine how he must’ve looked right now. The part of him he was touching… the pace he might’ve been keeping. Judging by the sounds he was making, I didn’t think he had plans to stay in there long.

I was trying to gauge whether I had even the smallest bit of confidence to knock… to tell him that I didn’t mind, and that I wouldn’t- that I wanted to help now if he… if he wanted me to-

“F-Fuck-” Dylan groaned again, forcing my eyes closed as my body reminded me that I wasn’t lasting long either. Not with how Dylan sounded… but it was his next word that yanked me so close to the fucking edge, I couldn’t quiet myself in time. “I-Isiah-” he moaned deeply, and that made my damn legs weak as I leant further into that frame, releasing the most choppy moan my hand had no possibility of muffling.

My heart rate had soared to new fucking heights. My whole body had started to shake with shivers. But most importantly, I heard the pressure of that water die down slightly… and that almost put me into fucking cardiac arrest.

He… had heard me.

… Shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit-

My panic wasn’t even given time to fully settle before I heard yet another deep, low moan from Dylan pass through that closed door clear as day, and the way I gripped my now throbbing cock almost made me come right then and there. I knew whatever muffling I was trying was all but failing at this point, but I didn’t know how to stop.

I didn’t know how to stop this, however fucking embarrassing it now was. My need to finally bring my body some relief overtook the simple fact that Dylan knew I was right outside this door, touching myself.

“Sh-shit-” he muttered again, forcing my eyes to squeeze so tight, I saw stars behind my eyelids. With that tap water being nothing but a stream, we could both hear it in our labored, exhausting breaths, in the increased moans passing past this door to both our ears…

We were both close.

“I-I-Isiah-” Dylan’s deep voice cut through that door again, with the tightness of it filling my ears, and my dick started to spasm in my hand as I released a choking moan. My hand could barely keep any type of pace once pleasure shot through to parts of me I don’t think I had ever tapped into before.

The orgasm Dylan had pulled from the alone, saying my name like that, coupled with the sounds of his more urgent grunts as he hit his peak himself, made my whole body a hot, clamored, shaking mess . It had to be about fifty to sixty degrees in this apartment right now and yet I was sweating through everything. I felt heat engulf my whole body as it too started to spasm along with my cock, unable to calm just how hard I had come as hot liquid shooting from my tip completely drenched my hand, the front of my briefs and some of the crotch area of my jeans.

I had never come so goddamn hard in my life. My ears were ringing, making it almost impossible to hear anything else. My intense heartbeat was drowning out any remaining sound…

So it was by some miracle when I finally heard the faucet of the bathroom switch off…

And that was when panic immediately overtook my intense pleasure and I yanked my slick hand out of my jeans quickly.

My legs barely functioned correct, but they functioned well enough for me to practically sprint to my bedroom. I was already wiping my hand on the front of my jeans while I rushed inside and closed the door slightly before I completely stripped out of both them and my wet briefs. I didn’t even manage to toss the cum-stained clothing all the way into my dirty clothes hamper before I scoured the clothes in my closet to find some sweatpants.

I could hear the door to the bathroom open suddenly just as I spotted a grey pair, which forced me to pull on the sweats without even bothering to look for a pair of briefs, and the sound of my bedroom door slowly opening was what had me turning to my left.

Dylan had entered slowly, yet the way his face was already flushed made that awkwardness between us flourish like fertilized flowers.

Shit.

His gaze slowly fell from mine with those insanely beautiful eyes of his, and they took their fucking time making it to the drawstring of the sweatpants that I was now tying off.

Shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit.

“I-I, uh-” my voice croaked out with nothing but unsurety. “I… I thought I’d… that I-I would, um- like put something warmer on.”

Dear fucking god that was by far the hardest sentence I had ever fully butchered my way through.

“R-R-Right,” Dylan stuttered out as he nodded quickly, almost forcing his gaze away from my body before he hurried back over to the bed. I kept my eyes off of him at this point because I wasn’t even sure what the hell I could do or say to make this any less insanely awkward.

I mean, we had-…

We had just…

We had skipped just about four thousand steps and somehow landed on jacking off to each others voices behind a closed fucking door.

There was nothing, and I mean nothing I could say to make that sound any less absolutely insane.

Nothing.

Instead I found myself carefully climbing into bed, making sure to give Dylan all the distance in the whole goddamn world because I was not about to make this night any more awkward.

I thought that this was how we’d find sleep again soon, with Dylan facing my back on one side of the bed, and me facing the TV that was now playing something else on the lowest volume.

Honestly, it was probably the safest… but it was the sound of Dylan clearing his throat slightly which had my eyes snapping open just as soon as sleep had started her song of seduction.

“I-Isiah?” He whispered carefully, his voice only a notch or two above the volume of the tv that sounded like a whisper in itself. I felt a hand gently place itself on the upper part of my right arm, and as it tugged slightly, I found my body reacting immediately. I slowly turned in the bed to face Dylan, whose features were still slightly illuminated by the dim setting of my bedside lamp.

I felt my breathing catch in my throat from just how fucking beautiful this man really had no business being. Especially not now. Not after we had just….

“Y-Yes?” I got out instead in a quiet, hesitant whisper of my own, unsure of what the hell was going to come next. With Dylan, it was honestly always a toss up.

The way he was looking at me now had me grabbing at the blankets we were bundled under, all the tighter, holding the fabric hard against me.

“I…. I’m… I’m s-sorry I-” Dylan started, but I quickly shook my head no. There was genuinely no part of me that could handle an apology right now, not when I had-

“I… I-… don’t apologize,” I told him even more softly now. “L-Let’s just try and find some rest for a bit, yeah?” I asked him, to which Dylan nodded, scooting closer.

“Yeah,” he nodded gently again. And I watched as he carefully lifted his right hand from under the thick blankets to place his carefully over my left one, making me smile instantly.

••

26. The Do-Over

Warning: Explicit Content (kinda, sorta, you be the judge lol)

Enjoy, lovelies! Substack with be updated a bit later today, just heading to a funeral this morning so this one is unedited

xoxo

Dylan

I was not prepared to answer for what the hell had happened the night before.

After I had retreated quickly to the bathroom to…

And Isiah, he had-…

Well, we had…

Honestly, I didn’t think I’d ever be mentally prepared to speak on it ever the fuck again.

Ever .

I didn’t think I’d even be able to look Isiah in the eyes again after that. After I had heard him…

Those deep fucking groans…

And yet, stirring awake the following morning had seemed to change a whole lot of things for me. Like for instance, as my eyes started adjusting to the slight light shining through Isiah’s window, I slowly took in more of the man who was sleeping right next to me, our bodies close but not fully touching.

And Isiah looked utterly fucking perfect as he slept peacefully. Him resting like this made me feel even more freaking guilty about the way I had woken him up in the middle of the night- well, woken us both up, really. Shame didn’t even begin to encapsulate how I felt about that.

He was closer to me now than when we had finally fallen asleep again, his body relaxed, lying  next to mine on his right side closest to the window with my right hand still over his left.

I couldn’t help but watch him as those slow, steady breaths were released. His curls had been tossed in almost every direction, and when I took in those few dark strands scattered carelessly across his forehead, watching as they shifted slightly while his head tilted a little further up on the pillow… I found myself unable to stop these all too curious hands of mine.

To stop one from raising from the top of Isiah’s hand before I gently brought it near his forehead and slowly pushed those soft curls back some, revealing more of his beautiful features to my still adjusting eyes.

The light glow of daylight from the window behind him filtered through some of those curls, highlighting those few bright golden strands mixed into the darker brown, creating the most beautiful hues.

He looked fucking ethereal , especially with how delicate his features had become in such a relaxed state.

We’d done this before, I couldn’t help but think.

Shared a bed for the night.

We used to do it all the time when we were younger… but this… this was… different . I didn’t have the urge to wake him up as soon as possible so we could go attempt breakfast together with a trusted adult chaperoning, making sure we didn’t burn the food, ourselves, or whichever home we were together in, down to ashes. Or rush to wake him so we could catch some Saturday morning cartoons.

Now, I wanted nothing more than for us to remain like this, where I could lay here next to him, simply watching him rest.

The room had warmed up slightly from the night before, which meant the heat was probably kicking in again, but the blankets we were buried under had been perfect to combat the cold, with the scent of Isiah’s cologne and shampoo surrounding every last inch of me. And as soon as my hands touched those gentle curls, I knew what I was doing was a mistake. But being this close, and seeing just how beautiful he really truly was, had made it practically impossible to pull away.

I had tried to be gentle as his soft curls wrapped themselves around my fingers, tempting me to run more of my hands through them, but I really didn’t want to wake him.

His breaths were so slow- so relaxed. And as I shifted more of his curls away, I found myself studying him even further. My eyes trailed slowly over each of his unique features, from his thick eyebrows that added such character to his face, or the way his dark long lashes fanned the sun-kissed skin right under his eyes, those eyelids twitching ever so slightly every so often, but he didn’t stir awake, and my gaze slowly lowered further.

I took in the defined brifge of his nose, visibly given a reminder of when he had accidentally ran into a tree when we were twelve, playing at Richmond Park, and broke the damn thing. They were able to straighten it out, but he still had the skightest remnants of a scar that had whitened against his tan skin. It was a scar I had seen often, but never in this light.

Not like this , I thought to myself, all too tempted to touch it.

I knew I needed to pay attention to what my hands were doing… but as my gaze fell to Isiah’s lips, I all too quickly forgot about all that.

All I could think about now was how they felt that night over a year ago… How they might feel against mine again. They were full, and seemingly always moisturized because Isiah had a habit of using chapstick every day. He had always claimed his skin was far too damn susceptible to drying up, which was why his skin itself was always soft. Always practically glowing.

I hadn’t even noticed what I was doing as my eyes remained on those lips of his, my breaths growing deeper at the thought of touching more of him. I hadn’t noticed that the tips of my fingers weren’t just lightly grazing the tips of his curls, nor that my hand had moved closer, trailing lightly the edge of his hairline as those very fingers slowly moved down the left side of his face.

I hadn’t noticed any of this until I watched isiah’s lips slightly part, forcing my gaze away from them to travel quickly back up to those hazel-green eyes that were finally opening up.

“Dylan…” Isiah murmurred quietly, his eyes remaining on mine. “Y-You’re up already.”

I found myself slowly nodding with the side of my head still resting against the pillow, and rubbing into the soft material in the process. “Y-Yeah,” I whispered quietly in return.

He was so fucking close.

My finger tips had now made it to the start of his left ear, and I didn’t touch him as lightly as I had before. I felt guilty that I had probably woken him up again, but the way his breath hitched as I dragged my thumb along his skin made it impossible for me to stop now. My finger tips moved lower as I started to trace the sharp edge of his jawline.

I wanted to pull him closer. I wanted him against me… to just feel more of him.

“W-What are you…” Isiah started, yet his voice held an even raspier tone this time, something past the roughness sleep always brought it. He hadn’t looked away for even a nanosecond- his gaze remained on mine just like mine did with his, and I knew deep, deep down that there were things I should probably be freaking out about right now, like checking my phone to see if my father had put out an APB on either me, his vehicle, or honestly, probably fucking both…

But I couldn’t care less about all that shit right now.

“W-What are you doing?” Isiah asked quietly, yet I could see his eyelids lowering somewhat as he practically tilted his head forward more into my touch. My fingers were caressing the skin below his jawline lightly, feeling the pulse of the vein that ran there, and how hard his heart had started to beat.

Was he… was he thinking of what I had when I first woke up? About what we had… did during the night? How he- we had… had…

“I-I-I… I d-don’t really know,” I whispered back with as little grace as humanly possible.

And in this moment, that was the honest to god truth.

I had no fucking idea what I was going to do next.

The only thing running through my mind right now was how fucking phenomenal Isiah had felt against me when I put that necklace on him. How his hand had fit perfectly in mine during the movie, and how it had fit perfectly in mine all night.

I thought about those tight moans and gritty groans he had release quietly right outside the door… and how uncontrolled they became as he reacted to his name falling past my lips, my mind racing as I thought about him touching himself.

Then there were his lips…

And just that mention to myself alone lured my gaze away from his eyes, back down to them once more.

He was close.

He was so fucking close.

If it wasn’t for the low voices of whatever was playing on Isiah’s TV now, I genuinely believe he might have heard my own heart beat that was hammering all too similarly to Isiah’s. Just an uncontrollable mess of a rhythm.

I was fucking nervous as all hell, and I… I didn’t know exactly what it was I had the confidence to do, but I at least had the confidence to ask. At least I thought I did.

“I-Isiah?” I whispered quietly to him as my gaze lingered on those lips of his before I forced them to travel up towards those utterly beautiful eyes.

“Y-Yes?” Isiah whispered as he eyed me carefully through those lower lids. He was leaning even further into my touch now, and it was starting to drive me a little crazy. Word were like hell to remember at this point, but I had to ask. I didn’t want to read into this wrong.

“W-Would y-you mind-…” I started, before taking a second to reword this so I wouldn’t sound so damn clinical. “I-I mean, can I…” the tip of Isiah’s tongue slid out slightly to moisten that bottom lip of his further before he curled it in for a moment, and I lost that fight to showing resraint so damn fast as my eyes fell to his lips yet again. “Can I… c-can we try a… a… do-over?”

Isiah hesitated for just a moent before he slowly nodded his head yes, and at this point, all I was screaming at myself to do was just go for it.

Just fucking do it Dylan , I told myself. You’ll never know if you suck at it unless you fucking try it.

And it was true. The way Isiah was looking at me- the way his breaths started to quicken, his heartbeat pounding even harder, told me that he might’ve wanted this as much as I did… but he had nodded his head yes, only further assuring me that it was okay.

That we could try again.

… And so I shifted my body closer on this soft mattress towards him, keeping my focus on those lips as I took the deepest of breaths to mentally quiet this forever loud mind of mine… it was a challenge when all I could smell was him. All I could feel was his shallow breaths and pounding heart. It felt like I was all but drowning in this man, and in return, that was making my whole body shake.

After that deep, deep breath, I finally slowly leant in, carefully bringing my lips to his.

I wasn’t even sure when my eyes drifted closed, but I felt his lips with every bit of vivid fucking detail as soon as the softness of them brushed lightly against mine, sending the deepest of shivers throughout my entire body. My heartbeat had fully steered itself off the rails at this point, very unwilling to keep me alive and whatnot.

Fuck, his lips felt so fucking perfect, holy fucking fuck-

Fuck!

I had to force myself to pull away gently right as I felt myself starting to lose complete control. There was a part of me that wanted… that practically begged for fucking more, but after what I did last night, I thought it was probably best that… that I…

“I-Isiah,” I found myself mumbling instead as I worked to get my eyes open. It took everything in me as is to try and create some distance between us again, but as I felt it- his heartbeat against my finger tips, the softness of his skin beneath them, I didn’t know how to fucking act. I created some distance, and yet I didn’t fucking want any between us. I was in a game of tug and war with myself at the current moment trying to understand what exactly I could ask for more of .

“Y-Yes?” I heard him whisper in the roughest of tones I had ever heard his voice take. His eyes were adjusting to me again.

And I couldn’t help it when my eyes slowly dropped to his lips once more. I wanted to feel them again so fucking badly I didn’t even know where to start with acting a shred of normal anymore.

“C-Can… can I-”

I felt Isiah’s breathing deepen as he didn’t even bother to give me enough time to speak before he rushed out a “y-y-yes- fuck- fffuck yes ,”… and that just about did it- solidifying that this… this was okay.

We were okay.

And so, I brought my lips as slowly as I could to his again. I wanted to give him the opportunity to pull away if he didn’t like it. The intense fear of completely ruining something that felt so built up between us didn’t clear, but I just went for it anyway. I was sick and tired of not acting on shit between us, and I’d been sick of it from the very first night I failed to kiss Isiah back a year ago. I didn’t want my fear to win out again, holding me back.

What I wasn’t expecting, however, was getting completely lost in the man himself as soon as my lips brushed against his soft ones once more.

I was the one to take it further when I should’ve showed more restraint. I pressed my lips further against him this time, damn near whimpering as I begged that he would show me a sign telling me he was okay with me wanting more…

And he did.

It didn’t take him more than a second to lift his hands, wrapping them around my neck as he pulled me a bit closer. I could feel his intense breaths now into this smoldering kiss, and I felt the deep shivers he gained little control over as they cut through his body unexpectedly.

This… this kiss- the way his lips molded against mine as his hands held me tighter… the softness of his skin… it was all starting to make me lightheaded. I could feel him shaking, and perhaps it was my own needs pressing against this, but I wanted to feel even more .

“I-I-I should stop-” I tried to mumble out as I pulled away somewhat from this intensity. I should , I then thought to myself. I didn’t want to pressure-

“ Please ,“ I heard Isiah whisper breathlessly, “ p-please don’t fucking stop, Dylan -“

His voice was raw, uneven, and so fucking urgent that that was pretty much all the confirmation I needed to not even dare to stop this, and at this point, my mind wasn’t anywhere near fully functioning to try. Right now I was thinking of how his bare skin might feel against my hands- if Isiah was comfortable with us maybe taking a few layers off.

So I brought my lips to his again, this time expressing my own urgency as I took his bottom lip between mine and grazed the softness of it with my teeth, pulling it between mine. The deepest, most grittiest moan Isiah released sent shivers straight down my spine, just elevating this lightheaded feeling of mine while his hands tugged further around my neck, and I had no control over my own growing moans.

Shit.

Sh-Shit, he felt so goddamn good-

I had no control over anything at this point… and perhaps that was what had me mumbling against him rather hastily, my words meshing with the intense softness of his lips, “I-Is… i-is y-your mum-”

“S-Still out,” Isiah whispered heavily , not wasting a single moment to confirm my own thoughts against our lips, and I tried to pull myself out of this daze his cologne had almost fucking suffocated me in by how his scent managed to linger everywhere, but it was no use. I found myself swiftly pushing him further onto his back as I carefully climbed on top, between his legs, and my lips quickly attached to his again.

I just- I wanted to feel… more .

Isiah didn’t stop me like the small voice inside my head was telling me that he might. That this might’ve been too much. Instead, he welcomed my unsurety and awkwardness like he always had as he held my lips with his, kissing me just as feverishly and send heat straight through my body to a particular part that ached for his touch. Everything felt like a dreamy haze. My brain felt like straight mush whenever I tried to think of anything that wasn’t Isiah kissing me like this, his tongue gently prodding my lips open.

I knew we had taken things to higher heights when while one hand kept me steady above him as I held myself up on the pillow he laid his head against, my right hand reached down lower to feel  for his thigh. I found myself pulling his left leg up against the outer part of my right, gliding my hand hesitantly yet deliberately along the length of it, feeling the soft material of his sweatpants… and the sudden sound Isiah made that pushed past all his light moans, had me freezing up entirely.

I… I hadn’t realized I had started grinding against a part of him that-… that-

“Sh-Should-… should I s-stop?” I whispered past my choppy, shallow breaths with some alertness in my tone. I-… I didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable-

“N-No,” Isiah shook his head quickly as he pulled me even closer down on him, wrapping that leg around my waist to almost physically confirm that it was okay. I could feel the shaking vibrations of his leg, but it only mirrored my jittery nerves mixing in with how fucking turned on I was. “I-I-I just- I…” his eyes shifted downward between us, where I was lying between his legs, his crotched pressed tight against my thigh, before he added, “I… I just m-might…”

And that admission alone had me fucking spiraling . “I-… I-I-I don’t mind-” I tried to answer him, and did so with just as much hastiness because I genuinely didn’t mind it. I truly fucking didn’t.

The thought of him coming from my… my touch-

“W-W-Will you-” I started, muttering these words against the softness of his lips as I ground my lower half into him even harder, feeling his body start to shudder more and more as my thigh quickly felt something hardening, pushing back against it. “W-Will you tell me to- tell me when to-”

My words were cut off completely by Isiah’s lips as he pressed them against mine again- harder . “ D-Don’t fucking stop. Please- p-please don’t fucking stop ,“ he whispered into me, and the chills that forced through my whole fucking body just about solidified it as my lips meshed with his yet again. I felt myself shifting a bit lower, unable to stop myself as I pressed the part of me that had started getting hard right as I woke up next to Isiah, against his own hard cock, hearing the deepest fucking groan leave Isiah’s lips.

Fuck, these- these fucking lips of his- fffuck-

I had wanted to only use my thigh because if I was being honest, I didn’t think I’d make it long if I felt his own hard dick right up against mine… but I couldn’t help myself anymore as each of his groans got louder, mirroring my own uncontrollable ones.

Right now, I wanted to be as close to him as physically fucking possible, which only convinced me to pull him even closer into my body, grinding my lower half even rougher against his as he and I both started to completely unravel.

That was when I felt him slowly lower his hands, making their way to the hem of my hoodie, and my right hand acted of its own accord as it slowly traveled from his thigh to the drawstring of his sweatpants, unable to stop myself from undoing the knot.

••

27. Shit

This was meant to go up yesterday but I’ve been on the fence about how raunchy it was/if it would pass for Wattpad. I decided I’d risk it so here it is lol. It’s also 4.2k words and I’ll edit later when I can get to my laptop (I’m at my exes rn)

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Warning: Explicit Content

Isiah

I didn’t remember falling back asleep.

All I remembered was praying sleep would seduce us rather quickly considering what Dylan and I had done during the night- us literally jerking off together.

Hell, at that point, sleep couldn’t fucking come soon enough. It was the way I was woken up however that had me fully surprised.

For starters, Dylan was still laying down next to me under these covers, and as my eyes adjusted to the slight light from the rising sun outside, I finally felt what had really woken me up.

Dylan’s touch.

I could feel it- his hands. And my heart decided right then and there that she was most definitely still a thing that beat and all that, regardless of her irregularity.

“Dylan…” I murmurred quietly, unsure of what to say as his touch alone started sending light shivers down my fucking spine. Those eyes of his… the way he was looking at me- shit . “Y-You’re up already.” Jesus, what fucking time even was it?

And how the bloody hell was it possible for someone to look so fucking good?

The window was behind me, but the sun that shone through it just about bathed Dylan’s perfect features in that golden light, and I was just about ready to lose it. My body hadn’t recovered from the night yet, I mean that voice of his was in my goddamn dreams it was so fucking hot. And the way he had said- moaned my name through that door? Just the thought was making my body burn up and Dylan’s touch now was an absolutely dangerous mix.

I could only watch as Dylan slowly nodded his head yes, rubbing his left side against the pillow. “Y-Yeah,” he whispered quietly in return.

He was so fucking close. When did he… when did he get so fucking close-

His finger tips had slowly made it to the start of my left ear, and I could really feel that touch of his now. My breath fully hitched as he dragged his thumb along my skin, and Dylan’s eyelids lowered slightly in the process. Those long, cooling finger tips of his moved lower as he started to trace the edge of my jawline and I all but fucking moaned out loud.

I was still too sensitive- my body was. And Dylan, he-…. He was-

“W-What are you…” I tried to get out as my heart started pounding harder, and the way my voice got even rougher wasn’t lost on me but I decided I was going to blame it on sleep and not the fact that I wanted for nothing more than to have him touch more of me. I couldn’t look away for even a nanosecond- not with the way Dylan’s light eyes remained on mine. Shit, he was so beautiful it wasn’t fucking fair.

How was I supposed to get through any more days like this? I kept telling myself that we needed to go slow- that I didn’t want to scare Dylan, but then he went ahead and did shit like… this .

Fucking fuck.

“W-What are you doing?” I asked him quietly with the most butchered voice I had ever heard come from me, yet I couldn’t freaking help shit as my own eyelids got heavier and I just about practically tilted my head forward more into his touch. His fingers were caressing the skin under my jawline lightly, and at this point I had no control over how I reacted to him.

My mind was praying Dylan would leave things at this… and that wish was solely because my heart was about to fucking flatline. My dick was getting harder and harder all while Dylan and I was blurring that line further with what we could do now and what we should probably wait on.

“I-I-I… I d-don’t really know,” Dylan whispered back with just as much coarseness in his voice as was in mine. It just made my toes curl themselves in tightly as I stifled a rogue moan.

And in this moment, that response sounded like the god honest truth. I genuinely believed that Dylan wasn’t thinking a lot of this through at all. The way he looked at me told me that this- what he was doing- was much more of doing and very little of thinking .

That was what scared me the most though.

Dylan just doing anything. I don’t think he really understood his effect on me. I don’t think he truly understood how fucking viscerally all of me reacted to him. I couldn’t really handle this whole teasing thing, not after I went a whole year without even seeing him after we kissed.

But most of all, I didn’t want to rush this. I couldn’t rush this.

Even if his touch now was making me lose my goddamn mind . Even if his gaze made my skin feel like it was doused in gasoline then set on literal fire.

Then there was his moans… how fucking incredible he sounded in that bathroom…

And just that thought alone made my dick so unbelievably hard, I couldn’t quite stop myself from squirming under these blankets, simply begging my body to control itself. The way Dylan lowered his gaze intentionally down to my lips almost made me do something fucking crazy… like bringing these lips to his.

He was close.

He was so fucking close I couldn’t stand it.

If it wasn’t for the low voices of whatever was playing on my TV now, I wholeheartedly believed that Dylan would be able to hear this mess of a fucking heartbeat. I knew he must’ve felt it at the very least with where he touched me now, dragging his hands slowly across the skin under my jaw and chin.

“I-Isiah?” He suddenly whispered in a low tone to me, locking his gaze on my lips a little while longer before those literally perfect light blue eyes eventually made their way up to mine.

“Y-Yes?” I whispered back, unable to control this strained voice. I was starting to lean even further into his touch now, and it was starting to drive me fully crazy. I wasn’t even sure how the hell I was still processing the fact that Dylan was saying words.

“W-Would y-you mind-…” he started, before pausing a bit abruptly. I didn’t say anything, though, not a damn fucking thing. I simply gave him some time to ask me what he wanted to. “I-I mean, can I…”

It was the intensity of the way he was looking at me now, which had me mindlessly sticking my tongue out slightly to moisten my lower lip, and Dylan’s gaze dropped there quickly again. It had to be a sin with how fucking intensely he was looking at me. This- my body- I was fucking malfunctioning, attempting to slow breaths that were so shallow, you’d think I had just finished running a half marathon. “Can I… c-can we try a… a… do-over?”

Once that question finally fell past Dylan’s full lips, I had to give myself just a second because I had honestly been about one more minute away from kissing him my damn self. But I made sure not to keep him waiting, and I gave him a gentle nod soon after, giving him the green light as if I wasn’t ready to run through a yellow light from how fucking good he felt.

I was dying for more… and if Dylan was okay with it, then I was willing to get on my hands and knees and beg for it.

This was… it was too much.

As soon as Dylan started to shift his body a bit closer on this soft mattress towards me, I felt it only accelerate this insane heart rate, keeping his focus on my own lips as he took the deepest of breaths. I could feel Dylan’s hand start to shake slightly, and for a second I considered telling him to stop. Maybe this was too much? Maybe he wasn’t ready? Maybe I… maybe I had misstepped-

I didn’t even have a full second to finish that thought before Dylan leant in. He had kept his light eyes on my lips up until the last possible moment, his hand still holding me in place by my upper neck now, and whatever strength I had left to maybe pull out of this pure seduction fucking vanished as soon as his lips touched mine.

I couldn’t think a single fucking thought once I felt it- the softness of his lips. They were utterly perfect- soft and full, and the kiss he planted on me was so goddamn gently, I quickly became literal putty in his hands.

Fuck, his lips felt so fucking perfect, holy fucking shit-

Once he started to pull away from this brief peck, I honestly almost whimpered at the lack of more. I… I wanted so much fucking more.

“I-Isiah,” Dylan mumbled quietly to me as he slowly opened his eyes again and I did the same. I watched as he created some distance between us again, and my mind was battling with itself trying to figure out what the hell to do next. I… I wanted more. The way my dick was pressing up against the fabric of my sweatpants told me that I clearly wanted more… but I couldn’t ask for more.

“Y-Yes?” I replied, and my tone at this point was a whole wreck. I was doing my best to adjust my eyes to him again because honestly, coming to terms with the fact that he and I had just done that together again made it feel like I was still dreaming.

And when Dylan’s gaze slowly lowered to my lips again, something I was actively trying to fight myself against doing because I could stare at his lips for days, I felt even more of my resolve slipping away.

“C-Can… can I-”

My breathing had deepened with those words, and though I had given this gorgeous fucking guy a lot of pauses to collect his words fully, this… this wasn’t one of those times. I quickly rushed out in the most chopped fucking voice “y-y-yes- fuck- fffuck yes ,”… and that just about seemed to do it. That seemed to give Dylan all the okay he needed, and at this point, all I could do was pray that us doing more wasn’t going to ruin anything because I was not about to say no to him.

Not like this. Not when he had practically brought a blowtorch to my body with that first kiss.

I watched as Dylan slowly brought himself closer, bringing his lips towards mine as his eyes slowly closed again, and my heart beat at this point just about gave up. I wanted for him to stop if he felt like it, but as soon as those lips touched mine, I couldn’t even conjure a single thought. I just knew that I didn’t- I-… I didn’t want him to stop.

His lips were so fucking soft, Jesus fucking Christ…

It was Dylan, however, who took things further. I felt it as he pressed his lips harder against mine, pushing me back lightly, and I found both my hands reaching up past these blankets to wrap my arms around his neck. I could feel myself shaking slightly just like Dylan was, and I wasn’t really sure how to process this between us, but I wasn’t willing to hesitate with him. I knew Dylan would stop if I did, and above all else, I wanted him to know that I had been waiting on this exact moment for so goddamn long it was criminal.

My breathing had long since gone haywire while his lips slowly moved against mine, sending the deepest of fucking shivers unexpectedly down my spine as I tried to catch my breath within this now smoldering kiss. I couldn’t stop how fucking good he fucking felt, nor how little control I had over how I reacted.

This… this kiss- the way his lips melted against mine as his hands tilted my chin up slightly towards him… the softness of his lips… it was starting to make me dizzy. I was starting to shiver more, and my dick was starting to leak pressed up against my lower stomach. I knew we should probably slow down again but I couldn’t bring myself to ask. I couldn’t stop myself from wanting even more.

“I-I-I should stop-” Dylan tried to mumble out as he started to pull away somewhat from this intensity. We should, I thought, but my arms tightened around Dylan’s slender neck instead, going against all logic. I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to stop.

“ Please ,“ my voice was the farthest thing from my own as I whispered- begged breathlessly, “ p-please don’t fucking stop, Dylan -“

I sounded like a whole mess, and I had never sounded so fucking urgent before. Right now all I was thinking was how desperately I needed his lips on mine again. And when he finally got the hint that I would stop the spinning of the earth on its axis before I stopped what we were doing now, he finally brought this lips back to mine.

What I wasn’t prepared for was Dylan doing more immediately , with him pulling my bottom lip between his and grazing the softness of it with his teeth, wedging it between them. I lost my control over the noises I made right then and there, releasing a groan so fucking deep my face had started to heat up fully at this intensity.

Shit.

Sh-Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit, he felt so goddamn good I just- I-

“I-Is… i-is y-your mum-” Dylan started to mumbling against this intense kiss, and words fell past my lips before I could even process them.

“S-Still out,” I whispered heavily in return, not wasting a single moment to confirm with him that we… we wouldn’t be interrupted right now if he maybe wanted to do more. It was a dangerous thing to even think of, but hearing him merely ask had me ready to risk it all. My whole body was aching for him to take things further, but it had to be him. His choice. I didn’t want to pressure him.

What I didn’t fucking expect was for Dylan to move us in that direction right the fuck away. My heart beat was battered to bits once I felt him quickly push me back onto my back with a hand he dropped to my chest. I felt him separate my legs with his knee before he climbed between them, and the way my breathing just fucking stopped for a moment had me thinking I was genuinely dying.

I wasn’t quite ready for all this, but I didn’t risk telling Dylan that. I just tried to focus on calming my stiff dick and erratic heart rate once she restarted herself. My brain felt like straight mush when I tried to think of a way to tell Dylan to slow down a bit without him feeling like we should stop.

He was holding himself up by his left hand on the mattress near my head, but when I felt his right hand reach down lower to feel for my thigh, that made my whole body give up on control.

I felt him pull my left leg up against the outer part of his right, gliding his hand a bit hesitantly yet fully fucking deliberately along the whole length of it, feeling the material of these sweatpants… and the sudden sound I fucking made at the feeling of both that and Dylan abruptly grinding his thigh against a part of me that was so painfully hard I didn’t know what to do anymore, unable to stop the embarrassing gritty, coarse groan that pushed past all my somewhat muffled lighter ones, had Dylan freeze up entirely.

Shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit, we were doing too much. I had scared him-

Dylan brushed against that part again and my back arched slightly off that damn mattress so hard, my toes curling in from the pure intensity

“Sh-Should-… should I s-stop?” He whispered past my own choppy, shallow breaths with genuine care in his tone. I could see that he wanted to make sure I was comfortable with it, but at this point I was willing to do anything he asked me to as long as he didn’t stop touching me.

“N-No,” I shook my head quickly, wrapping my left leg around his slender waist. I knew he’d stop immediately if I said so, I could read the hesitancy in his eyes regardless of the way he looked at me with such hunger in his fucking eyes my heart was rebooting every three seconds. “I-I-I just- I…” my eyes quickly lowered downward between us, to where he was lying between my legs, my whole dick pressed tight against his thigh with just my sweatpants and his between us, before I hesitantly added, “I… I just m-might…”

And that admission alone made Dylan’s eyes darken further. “I-… I-I-I don’t mind-” he replied, and his voice alone sounded the most strained I had ever heard it. He was reassuring me, and I was absolutely feeling reassured as all hell now. It felt like with every new thing he and I did together, I was absolutely terrified that me coming might be what does it for him. I was afraid that would be the nail in the coffin with scaring him off.

“W-W-Will you-” Dylan whispered as his lips pressed hard against mine again, muttering these words against our kiss as he started to grind his lower half into me even harder, surely feeling my body start to shudder more and more as his thigh pushed against my rock hard dick. He was going to make me cum soon, there was no way around it, and the moans that fell freely past my lips acted as a warning to Dylan because I had no way of lasting long. “W-Will you tell me to- tell me when to-”

His jumbled words were cut off completely by my lips as I pressed them against his even fucking harder . “ D-Don’t fucking stop. Please- p-please don’t fucking stop ,“ I whispered with a voice I fully didn’t recognize, and the chills that traveled through Dylan as he shivered against me made me a dizzy goddamn mess. His cologne was everywhere, placing an imprint on my bed and these sheets.

How the fucking hell was I supposed to survive this? How was I supposed to hold back when- when he-

I felt him shifting a bit lower, unable to stop him from pressing  that part of him up against me that made me fucking crumble.

F-Fuck, this- this fucking- fffuck- fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck-

I couldn’t control any bit of my groans. I couldn’t control a damn thing anymore, not when I felt it- how fucking turned on he was by this. He liked this… and the pace he started with grinding our lower halves together forced from me the most shameful fucking noises. “Sh-Shit- Dylan-” I moaned heavily into this kiss. “Shit- fuck- Dylan, right- right-”

My body was no longer in my control as I lowered my hands from his neck right down to the hem of his sweater. I needed all these layers off. I needed to feel more of him against me, and knowing now that Dylan-…. That he… he was as fucking turned on as I was, I couldn’t wait any longer. I felt his own hand start to move from the thigh of the leg I had wrapped around his waist, to the drawstring of my sweatpants.

I didn’t quite process what the hell he was doing until he pushed that large hand past the waistband of my sweatpants and wrapped his long fingers around my dick, forcing my back right off that goddamn mattress as the rawest moan cut through me.

“D-D-Dylan-” I tried to rush out- to slow him down a bit. I could feel his hands getting coated in my precum and I didn’t want him to do more than he was comfortable with. “D-D-DDylan-” I tried again, breaking a kiss he started again that was growing even more fucking heated. “Y-Y-You don’t- y-you don’t have to-”

When Dylan pressed his own dick even more firmly against mine, I felt him separate us from this kiss for only a moment to finish what I started- he quickly yanked his hoodie off with the hand that was holding him up. I tried to reach for the hem of his shirt next but Dylan threw me the biggest fucking curveball once that large hand grabbed both my hands and raised them above me, pinning them above my head.

“D-D-Dyla-” my voice croaked out, but once I felt that hand of his start to stroke the length of me, I completely crumbled, my back arching off this bed again as I released a hopeless fucking whimper.

“Y-You’re so hard-… so slick-”

Jesus fucking fuck , my toes curled in tightly as I felt my body trying to close my legs more from such fucking intense pleasure, but Dylan pushed them open further.

“D-D-Dylan, p-please-” I fucking gasped when I felt his thumb swipe over the tip of me, sending me right to the very edge. I hadn’t expected he’d- that he’d touch-

“I… I-I fucking love seeing y-you like th-this-” Dylan mumbled, so fucking lost in this as he pulled away slightly to catch my gaze. I didn’t even know what to do anymore. His deep voice made me fucking lose the last of my sanity, and the way his fingers stroked my shaft had my body shaking profusely.

I wasn’t going to last. I was absolutely about to cum soon.

I had tried to get some fucking words out to warn Dylan, but he managed to push my legs open wider, granted him more access to me, and that building pleasure was brought to the hilt of its fill. It was the sound of Dylan’s phone buzzing somewhere that tried to capture my attention… but once I opened my eyes to the intensity of Dylan as he fixated on me unraveling below him, I could see the lack of fucks he had to give about his phone ringing.

“I-… I-I want you t-to cum for me-” Dylan mumbled quietly with the deepest rasp. My back separated from that mattress so damn fast, while I whispered out what I could.

“Sh-Sh-Shit- sh-shit, Dylan , shit -” my hands tried to push back against his, what was holding mine above my head, but it was no use. Dylan had me in a locked hold, and that darkened look in his eyes told me he wasn’t going to let go until I… I…

“Y-Your phone-” I attempted through my loud as shit moans, but Dylan didn’t give a damn. He kept himself slightly above me with his hand down my sweats, jerking me off at a relentless pace that had me all but screaming his damn name. I felt myself getting more light headed as pleasure started building in one spot, and I couldn’t hold it long.

“C-Cum for me, I-Isiah,” Dylan requested, but it sounded more like an order if anything, and I couldn’t even describe the sound I made when I felt hot liquid shoot from my tip, coating his whole hand in the process.

“Sh-Shit- Dylan

• sh-sh-shit- I- s h-shitttt “ I muttered out through the shallowest of breaths as my chest pounded under the fabric of my sweater. I had came so damn hard my ears were ringing, yet the look Dylan gave me told me that he wasn’t planning on slowing down yet.

His hand had slipped out of the waistband of my now wet sweatpants, but he was already started to pull them down further. And as soon as I felt him release my hands just enough, I removed one from his hold to try and feel for the phone that was buzzing near my head under this pillow because if Dylan did anything more now, whoever was calling was about to be ignored for a hell of a lot longer.

Once I got a good look at the caller ID through my hazy, sex driven gaze, I almost had a goddamn heart attack.

“Sh-Sh-Shit!” I stuttered out breathlessly because at this point, Dylan was one more pull from freeing my whole dick from these sweatpants, but my shaking hand nudged the phone towards him before barely getting out a sentence that finally reached through this daze he was in. “F-Fuck- I-It’s y-your dad, D-Dylan.”

That sentence alone had us both fucking scrambling .

••

28. I’m Calling The Police

Edited chapter going on Substack in a bit. My A/C stopped working this morning though and it’s goddamn 95 degrees in MN today. I gotta figure that out first lol

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Dylan

“D-Dad!” I stuttered out into the line quickly.

This man really had the worst fucking timing possible, I swear to god.

“Where the fuck are you? And why do you sound out of breath? Matter fact, where the complete fuck is my car?” My father demanded quickly.

Shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit.

“I’m… I’m uh, at Isiah’s. W-We just got done… working out.”

“Working out, huh?” My dad replied. I glanced down at Isiah who was still very much so underneath me and he looked every bit of frightened as I did. His breaths were still short from what we had just done, and whatever level of bold I once felt was now gone. “Didn’t I ground you?”

“You… well yes, technically you did, but you allowed me to go to Isiah’s remember?” I offered carefully.

“For the evening, you fucker. Carson went to visit his mums so I need my damn car back.”

…Shit.

Shit!

I scrambled up, climbing off of Isiah quickly. Fucking hell . Isiah was still a panting mess below on the bed, his body shivering slightly after having literally just came. I couldn’t quite pull my gaze away either- seeing him like this, an unraveled mess, was the hottest fucking thing.

And the fact that I had to leave him like this was complete bullshit.

Isiah carefully reached over for the Kleenexes on his bedside table, but before he could slip his hand into his sweatpants to clean himself up, I grabbed that Kleenex so damn fast. Isiah looked at me somewhat curiously but I just mouthed to him to let me do it.

My father had strung out a whole list of curse words but I wasn’t paying him any attention. My focus was solely on Isiah as I gently reached down past the waistband of his sweatpants, feeling the slick mess there.

“Sh-Shit-” Isiah whispered out a quiet moan when I touched him, cleaning his dick off with the soft tissue. His body jolted at the sudden feeling, and he tried to reach for my hand but I shook my head no. “D-Dylan-” Isiah muttered, but my hand had a mind of its own as I felt a little more of him, my fingers all but abandoning the tissue as I started to slowly stroke him again. “Sh-Shit- w-w-wait Dylan-”

“ Just a bit more ,“ I murmured in return, forgetting I still had this damn phone to my fucking ear.

“Don’t fucking patronize me,” my dad snapped into the line, making my eyes roll. If he was here, I’d probably be grounded again on top of already being grounded. “I’ll climb through this phone and snatch you up myself.”

Isiah’s tip was already leaking onto my hand, his dick now rock solid again, and Isiah brought both his hands to his mouth to try and stifle the moans slipping past those soft, perfect lips. Fuck , I was getting more and more obsessed with him each goddamn second. I could kiss those lips all fucking day. The thought of them alone turned me the hell on… but the thought of Isiah’s lips wrapped tight around the tip of my cock almost had me moaning into this phone call as I continued to stroke him.

“Are you fucking listening to me?” My father snapped into the line, and I had gotten so caught up in this- in the way Isiah’s eyes met my light ones. The way his body was starting to fucking tremble . I was obsessed with all of it.

My own dick was starting to leak from how fucking good Isiah looked like this. I wanted him like this all day, him unraveling by my hand. Watching him cum was arguably one of my top favourite things now that I experienced it, and I genuinely couldn’t stop. There was nothing that could-

“I’m calling the police,” my dad spoke, making my whole body pause. Isiah wasn’t going to last much longer, I knew that by how much tighter he had clamped his hands over his lips to try muffling more moans. As soon as I stopped stroking his length, Isiah’s eyebrows creased with confusion.

“Wait wait wait- hold on- let’s not do anything irrational, dad. The cops aren’t necessary-”

As soon as I mentioned the cops, Isiah sat up quickly in alarm. He was still hard but I think the cops was enough to force us both out of whatever we were doing together.

“Like hell it isn’t. You are an adult fugitive on the run with a stolen car. Sounds like a job for the police.” My father replied, which was what got me off this bed with lightning speeds. I was already looking around for my sweatshirt because if my dad decided he wanted to call the cops, the cops were getting called.

Isiah was already scrambling off the bed himself, and while I threw on my sweatshirt, he rummaged through his closet for what seemed like a change of pants, opting for another pair of sweatpants that weren’t damp with his cum. I personally preferred him in his cum soaked sweatpants instead, but that probably would’ve been inappropriate for him to walk around the rest of the home in if his parents came back.

I had been planning to mooch off my father for many, many, many more years… but this morning made me think of what it might be like living with Isiah after high school. He was great with his hands, an amazing saver, and he wasn’t picky about food like I was.

And we… we could do… things… without worrying about being interrupted.

My father was still rambling away on the phone, but I was distracted by Isiah pulling his stained pants off. Fuck, I was utterly obsessed with every part of him. I mean he seriously had bulked up within a year, and when he quickly pulled off his briefs, revealing his back side and bare ass, I looked-… okay, I stared. Hard . Like really fucking hard.

Like to the point that I barely registered my dad calling my name until he spoke a bit louder.

“Y-Yes dad, yes, I hear you, I’m on my way already.”

“You do know there’s such a thing as Find My IPhone, right?” My dad replied, but I was barely paying him any mind. Not when I got a glimpse of more of Isiah, but the man was moving too fucking fast.

“ Slower ,“ I unintentionally said out loud, and Isiah turned around with the pair of sweatpants he was about to put on in his hands. I raked my eyes over his lower half, smirking slight as Isiah bare cock started to stiffen again. He must have heard me because he was starting to move much slower, but he and my father apparently both heard that.

“What the hell are you talking about?” My father asked me over the phone.

“I’m just pulling onto the freeway,” I lied, my eyes completely glued on Isiah as he slowly pulled those pants on, “a car was speeding.”

“Dylan, I have your location. You haven’t left Isiah’s.” My father snapped back.

Shit. Right.

“Isiah and I are eating breakfast, I was telling him to chew slower.” Isiah’s eyes found mine as mine travelled slowly up his now clothed frame. I was willing to do dangerous fucking things to see him naked, but one thing I wouldn’t do is have the cops called because of me.

“And now why the hell would you tell him to slow down? And why are you still there? You should be in my car by now.” My dad replied.

“You want me to cut breakfast short?” I asked him, knowing exactly what that answer was going to be.

“Fuck yes, pack up whatever you’re eating if you want, but no eating in my car.” Good ol pops hit me with.

“But you eat in your car,” I argued.

“Yes because I am an adult who knows how to be tidy. You, my good sir, are a walking fucking mess. I guess some habits never change.”

I simply rolled my eyes, allowing Isiah to lead us out of his bedroom. I didn’t want to leave, and it wasn’t just for reasons out of spite for my father. Isiah’s bedroom felt… private . We could kiss and touch each other whenever we wanted to, and I was hesitant to do anything outside of it in case his mother had came home. Once we were out in the living room, however, we found it completely empty.

“This conversation has gone on entirely too long,” my father grumbled into the line. You have approximately thirty seconds to move this little dot on the Find My IPhone app before I call and report you and my stolen vehicle to the authorities.“ My dad finished before ending the call, and that was when I decided I really did have to go.

“I’ve got about twenty five seconds before my dad calls the police.” I told Isiah as I started slipping on my shoes. “Well technically like ten.”

“Ten?” He asked me curiously, to which I nodded. “What do you plan on doing with the other fifteen?”

That question made me smile as I reached for the waist of his smaller frame and yanked him towards me by his sweatshirt. “This,” I replied before bringing my lips quickly down to his. Isiah wasn’t anticipating this kiss, but as soon as my lips touched his, he immediately melted against me.

Fuck , his lips were so goddamn soft. I couldn’t help but press against him more, feeling them soften even further against mine as we most definitely pushed past just a peck. Feeling that wall behind us, Isiah pressed his lips against mine even harder, releasing a deep moan into this kiss.

He was kissing me like I was going off to war, not home. I had wrapped my arms around his waist, but now having caught a glimpse of his lower part completely nude, it made me drop my hands slowly to his plump ass, giving it a firm squeeze.

And the moan released from Isiah made me all the more greedy. I gently separated my lips from his, before attaching them to the left side of his neck, and the way Isiah’s slightly shaking hands tightened their hold on my neck told me he might like this. I kissed the soft skin there first, but Isiah was already a withering mess.

“D-D-D-Dylan-” he tried to get out between the most downright sexy moans imaginable. “D-Dylan-”

My hands were starting to gravitate, exploring all over this man, and when I brought one to the front of him, Isiah practically cried out an unexpected moan.

“D-Do you l-like me kissing here?” I nibbled gently on his neck. “Or would-… w-would you like my lips down here instead?” I gave his hard dick a gentle squeeze and the sweet moans Isiah let out were fucking everything .

“D-D-D-Dylan- D-Dyl- please- your- shit- fuck .” Isiah then tilted his head, giving me more access as I continued stroking his cock. I wanted to make him cum again- he had looked fucking ethereal when he did before, and I wanted that again.

My lips were starting to suck in the skin, feeling Isiah shaking against me at the feeling. His heart was fucking pounding right now, it’s beating rhythm drumming against my lips. I may have forgotten all about the bullshit time limit, but Isiah seemed to remember because even while radiating with literal pleasure, his moans falling past him freely, I still felt him gently nudge me back.

“D-D-Dylan p-please- p-please- please don’t make me piss off your dad. P-Please.”

It was honestly only because Isiah requested it that I stopped. If he hadn’t, I was genuinely about to drag him back to his bedroom. He was so… so sensitive with me- like these touches were coming from a deity or something.

I wanted to know if he fantasized about me. I wanted to know what he wanted me to do with him. Perhaps to him. We’d been friends for so long it already felt like we were dating, but now we got to add this… element to it, and if Isiah looked that good coming, I was going to make him do that a whole lot more.

Honestly, my sexual experience was at a complete zero, but Isiah didn’t seem to mind.

He just wanted me.

And I only wanted him.

I knew he came with some experience, but I wanted us to explore it together, too. I wanted to see what he and I could do to make it the best experience he had had yet, because for now I just knew handjobs were a good start.

I wanted him to like his first times with me. And honestly, I wanted to fully top whatever the hell he did with Ryker. Just the thought alone pissed me off- that Ryker got to have so much of him for a whole year while I was gone. Well I was back now. And it wasn’t that Isiah couldn’t have friends or anything but we were absolutely dropping the with benefits part for all of his other friendships.

That wasn’t a thing anymore. I’d prove that I could satisfy him in that department.

“Okay,” I nodded, a bit breathless by what we had just done. “Okay, you’re right. I don’t want him banning me from ever visiting again.” I mumbled, really thinking of Isiah’s decision to stop… because the way he looked up at me, his eyelids lowered, his pupils dilated… his fucking lips parted slightly… I had left a mark on his neck, a pretty big one, and I was itching to do it again.

“We’ll see each other at school. And I’m sure you’ll be ungrounded soon-”

“Not if my father has anything to do with it.” I muttered in return. “He was pushing for the term length of my entire existence.”

“Then let’s not do anything to piss him off,” Isiah replied, though the look he was trying to wear off that face of his was telling me to drag him back to the bedroom. His body went against that request, and the dick he hid in those sweats was fully hard, tenting under the soft material.

“When can… w-when can I see you again? O-Outside of school?” I asked. School was going to be a mission to navigate, and I wasn’t sure if Isiah wanted to be open about it. I was also going to have to explain this entire mess to Molly who would one hundred percent freak out, but in a good way. We had after all gone from best friends to enemies to best friends to lovers.

God, calling us lovers was so old timey but I loved it.

“We’ll shoot for next week if your dearest father takes pity on our newly reestablished friendship and allows it.” Isiah offered. “We could also try to hang out after school again, and tell your dad we’re working on the project.”

“If we tell him that, he’s going to ask for a progress report. Plus his work schedule has been all over the damn place, he might be home earlier some days this week to compensate for overtime.” I explained. Honestly I didn’t understand my dad’s visceral need to work, he was old enough to retire.

“Then we won’t… we… we might not be able to…” I tried to say. If my dad was home, I wasn’t touching Isiah with a ten foot pole that was for certain. I was still trying to find the right moment to tell that old man that I was fully obsessed with Isiah.

I didn’t really have to put a label on my sexuality when I hadn’t even kissed a girl yet. I just knew that I was falling so fucking hard for Isiah.

I watched as this handsome devil of a man took one small step forward. It would be so simple to just reach down and capture his lips with mine… but I respected his decision to stop.

“There are other moments… the drive from school to your home… my place if both my parents are out… I do have a lock on my door you know if they aren’t out.”

He was definitely taking a dig at my bedroom door which did not have a lock, with that last part… but he also said all this so seductively that I didn’t really give a fuck, I just wanted to touch him again.

“I think your mum would question why we’re in a locked bedroom together.” I noted to him.

“I’ll just tell her we’re watching porn together.” He replied, which had me chuckling immediately. For some reason, I genuinely believed that excuse would fly in the Jacobs household. If I used that excuse at mine, I’m pretty sure my father would drop dead from a heart attack.

Carson probably wouldn’t care though.

“Hey you know that woman better than I. If you think that’ll work, I’m in.” I offered him a casual shrug which made Isiah smile.

“Perfect, now fucking go before this place gets swatted. I don’t feel like dealing with law enforcement today.” Isiah reached for the front door to pull it open for me, and I quickly tried to grab at him for just one more kiss, but he stepped out of my reach much quicker, seemingly already predicting that I was going to try to pull some shit like this.

I couldn’t help but pout a bit. “No goodbye kiss?” I asked him.

“You already got your goodbye kiss. You ended up making it much more than a kiss and now we’re here so go .” Isiah ordered, shooing me away.

And he kept firm on that action by closing the door right in my face.

Honestly, it was a good thing too because if I got the chance to kiss him again, I wouldn’t let him go.

My return to my father was a sobering one. I had forgotten I had mentioned eating with Isiah, and so, mid lecture, this old man literally interrupted himself to confront me once I reached for the fridge door.

“Didn’t you just eat?” My dad asked.

Shit.

“O-Oh um yeah, I’m just grabbing some juice.” I replied quickly.

And so that was how I went about missing breakfast for the day as I brought a juice pack to the kitchen Island so my father could continue his lecture about my immaturity and negligence.

••

29. Anywhere, Anytime

I’ll get Substack updated with the edited version of this chapter tomorrow morning along with a new chap of The Defense Rests. You’ll also probs see additional unedited uploads to The Sword of Excalibur tonight on Wattpad and the edited chapters will be live tomorrow!

Enjoy, lovelies!

Also: how are we liking the longer chapters on my works? I’ve been keeping them between 2600-4400 words because I know I’ve got a lot of stories going at once and a week between chapters is a long wait, so let me know your thoughts!

Warning: Explicit Content

Isiah

I was losing literal sleep over Dylan fucking Holland.

Both figuratively and literally.

I couldn’t get him out of my head. I couldn’t get that kiss, or everything we did after it, out of my head either. There was no way to describe the way he looked at me- when he touched me. And what he… did to me… I couldn’t stop any of it out from seeping into every thought I had.

I had tried to stop him when he was on the phone with his dad Saturday morning and ultimately failed, but I forced myself to stop him after that rather extensive goodbye kiss.

The way he was fucking looking at me with those piercing light eyes- the way they darkened slightly every time he touched me… I knew he wouldn’t leave things at just that, and the one person not a single living soul ever wanted to make an enemy of, was Donald fucking Whittaker-Jones.

I wasn’t about to crash land this very new relationship like that when Dylan and I had just taken off.

This whole school week was hell though, watching Dylan in class and not being able to touch him whenever I wanted to. There was a moment in Chem on Wednesday where he placed his hand on my thigh while we worked away on our science project which the due date was coming up for, but the moment was brief and he caught himself not a second later before removing it.

“I-I’m sorry-” he started, trying to apologize but I just shook my head no.

“Don’t ever apologize for, um… for… touching me,” I whispered back quietly to Dylan, and the look in his eyes felt all too familiar. What I wasn’t expecting however was for him to stand up abruptly and reach for my wrist, pulling me up out of my desk along with him.

“Dy-Dylan, w-what are you-”

I barely got those words out as I started to be dragged by this giant towards the front of the classroom. “I left some items for our project in my locker,” he said to the teacher in passing, and I think I heard “no problem” as a reply, but I couldn’t know for sure because I was already in the damn halls of a school before I could even register a response.

“D-Dylan w-wait, where are- where are we going?” I spoke to this man’s back as he led us somewhere with a whole lot of purpose.

“Somewhere private.” He replied. I didn’t even think there was such a place in this school, but Dylan led us right to a janitors closet, opened that door, and just about tossed me in the small room before reaching for the light string while he closed the door behind us.

And as soon, I mean as soon as that door fully closed, his lips were on mine.

We hadn’t touched each other since Saturday morning, but it was like I fucking craved him- like I was some kind of addict, needing his touch to get my fix in. And I was well aware of the risks of doing this at school, but as soon as he touched me I fucking folded like a damn lawn chair. I tangled my fingers in his long curled locks of hair, feeling that familiar shiver run through me as he poured all of his needs into this kiss.

He fucking took my breath away, and when his hands started to glide down my lower back, I could feel his erection pushing against my stomach.

Every moment we had been together, Dylan had focused on me- so much so that it felt a bit one sided. We had just started seeing each other Saturday morning, and then there was that incident Friday night, but that was… well, that was him jerking himself off while I did the same.

I wanted to make him feel good. I wanted to make sure he understood that I could fully take care of him. Heavy on fully , judging by my previous relationships. I hadn’t taken a dick up my ass before, but for Dylan I would… unless he wanted to. It didn’t matter to me, he was the only one I wanted to be that close to.

That intimate with.

And so, as I separated my lips from his soft, perfect ones, Dylan looked very confused… until he watched me slowly lower myself down onto my knees. “I-I-Isiah?” He asked hesitantly. “You don’t… y-you don’t have to-”

“I want to,” I replied.“ I-… t-trust me… I really fucking want to, Dylan.“

That seemed to do it, with Dylan releasing the grittiest fucking groan while I reached up for his zipper. He was already so hard, his dick pressing tight against his pants and ridiculously soft briefs,  creating one intense imprint, and he was… well, let’s just say that his size is proportionate his height.

“You’re… you’re big everywhere,” I mumbled quietly, freeing his dick from these nice ass briefs before glancing back up at Dylan who was following every bit of my actions like this was a class of our own and and he felt a pop quiz coming soon.

“I-I’m sorry- y-y-you don’t h-h- ah!” He sort of yelped as soon as I touched his bare skin, not waiting a single moment to bring his dick to my mouth. “H-Holy f-fucking- holy- f-fuck!” He placed a hand on the metal shelves to my left, bracing himself. “Sh-Shit, I-Isiah, you… y-you look so f-fucking incredible like this- y-you-… you feel so- f-f-fuck -.”

That fucking did it for me. Hearing Dylan say those words in that deep, rough voice of his- it beat out every previous sex act I had simply ever done. I could’ve cum from just his voice alone, but this wasn’t about me right now, and as I stretched my lips tight around his dick, and my tongue started to lick his tip, Dylan’s head turned towards the ceiling as another strained moan cut through him.

“I-I-I’m trying not to c-cum. Y-You just started,” he fumbled with his words as he kept his gaze toward the ceiling, but I wasn’t having any of that. I wanted him to look at me- to look at me the same way he looked at me in that bedroom. With intense want . And as I pulled his dick out of my mouth, Dylan glanced down at me to ask “why… w-why did you… i-is everything okay?”

“No,” I replied, and the panic that swept across Dylan’s gorgeous face was immediate enough for me to add quickly “I just- I… I don’t want you to look away.”

“B-But I’ll- I’ll cum.”

“That’s fine. Just… just don’t look away. I-… I, uh… I- I want you to watch me. The way you did when we were on my bed.”

“Sh-Sh-Shit-… sh-shit, o-okay… o-… okay.” Dylan’s breathing was getting heavier, and with the placement with the closet light right behind him, he looked like a god from this angle. If I touched myself now I would cum from just that perfect face again, how delicate his features truly were…

But this wasn’t about me right now. He’d already made me cum and pretty much every day since then I have jacked off at least twice to the thought of it- of how he had grabbed my hands and firmly held them over my head. I had never seen that side of Dylan before and honestly, a more dominant side, and it made me rock fucking

solid just thinking of it.

Then it was one word. A command which was just the cherry on top when he more or less ordered me to change slower… that turned me on so damn bad it was insane to even think about, but I did think about it. Repeatedly.

I had never been into the dominant stuff, but there was something so unbelievably hot about Dylan’s delicate features with a deep voice ordering me to do something. Fucking anything . He honestly reminded me a bit like his father, that direct intense personality, except I think Dylan kept the urges Don so freely showed with his complete ruthlessness, at bay.

A perfect fucking balance of ruthlessness and kindness.

I had to refocus to get myself back on track once I placed his cock back in my mouth because who knew how much time we actually had, and reminiscing on how fucking perfect Dylan was wasn’t really going to help that any, but the immediate stream of curse words that followed were so intense from him, I could feel the tip of my own cock start to leak.

This was everything …. watching him shiver in pleasure as I took in more of his length. He was holding onto that shelf so damn hard, the shit on it was rattling with each shiver that travelled through him. Dylan’s strength was so oblivious to him that here he was rattling a whole metal shelf from just that intense grip.

The only issue was the sound it made against the concrete floor, so I reached up to tug the front of his shirt, signaling for him drop his hand. This wasn’t exactly the most private space, and I was worried someone would hear what was honestly starting to sound like a damn stampede.

I reached over slightly to place his hand on my head instead, but Dylan quickly hesitated, stopping me.

His words were a breathy, choppy mess but I still understood them. “I-I-I d-don’t- I don’t- I don’t want to- to hurt-”

I took his cock out of my mouth, coercing another thick moan from him, to say “y-you won’t… you won’t hurt me, Dylan.” I genuinely knew for a fact that he wouldn’t mean to hurt me, and with his dick in my mouth, I was the still technically the one in control here.

“Just- I’ll tr- I’ll be gentle.” He spoke shakily, and I gave him a nod before placing his length back past my slick lips. It was uncomfortable because it was big- bigger than all the dicks I’ve faced in my lifetime, but for Dylan, I’d try. I’d let him fucking face fuck me if he wanted to. If that was what made him lose more of his control, releasing moans that made my body burn with more need.

Right now was just about him. Only him.

And once I starting really going at it, using what I would consider my area of expertise in cock sucking, I felt his hands tighten on the strands of hair he had placed, releasing a series of deep moans and groans I wish I could’ve recorded on my phone for some alone time later it was so goddamn fucking hot .

And the thing about Dylan was that he was never purposely trying to be attractive. Growing up, he was so oblivious to how many girls crushed on him from afar. Dylan was always friendly to whoever had the balls to approach him and ask him out, but nothing really worked out. If I’m being honest, I told a few girls that he already had a girlfriend our freshman and sophomore year because I was so in love with him and genuinely couldn’t fathom him seeing anyone but me.

I realize now that that was batshit crazy of me to do, but I couldn’t help it then. We had spent every second we could together, it was difficult not to fall for him. We spent holidays together and celebrated every birthday besides when he was in Ireland. We had weekly dinners and always had our lunch together on the bleachers regardless of the classes we took.

Dylan was the only one who knew every part of me- my life… my heart… everything, honestly.

There was no fucking way not to fall in love with him.

Looking up at Dylan now with my lips wrapped tight around his large shaft, feeling the hold of his fingers tangled in my hair, tightening… it felt like a fucking dream. And the deep groans he released sounded so damn good, it was almost terrifying. I didn’t know how we’d survive this week if he was still grounded, but I was prepared to ask him if I could come over after school for project work. I wanted more of him, and I didn’t want to deal with the worry of us being interrupted by someone at school.

We had planned for this Friday but I couldn’t wait any longer. I wanted more time with him, even if his parents were home. I just liked being near him and getting to openly stare at him while knowing that he liked this. He liked it, regardless of it being his first and hopefully very last relationship. I wasn’t sure what college had in store for us either, but we already had plans to stay close regardless.

“F-F-Fuck- ffuck, f-fuck you feel so f-fucking good- fu- fuck, Isiah,” Dylan moaned, and I swear to god I almost came without even touching myself. I hummed around his cock in pure fucking bliss because he liked it. Everything he and I did together, I was nervous as shit about, but the way he was looking at me now was like that time on bed, his lips slightly parted and his eyelids lowered some.

He looked like he was almost in a trance. And I fucking loved it.

The fact that I could make him feel this good gave me so much more hope for us exploring things together. We’d done everything together in the past so the dates we could now go on would honestly feel like they’d be just us hanging out, spending time together… but now I got to actually kiss him. Touch him. Hold him . I got to do everything I had fantasized about, but this reality was even better than my fantasies.

His touch had me shivering, shaking from such intensity. Those hands of his? They definitely had a mind of their own. I don’t think I had ever had someone grab my ass like that, so deliberately feeling me up, and the way it made my cock twitch every single time I thought about it was actual voodoo.

I could hear Dylan’s moans getting louder, and he was starting to apply some pressure at the back of my neck, driving more of his cock into my mouth. It was uncomfortable but I didn’t give a shit. I wanted to show him that I would always do anything for him- I would always try anything to see whether he liked it, and I was cool with that because I knew he genuinely would never willingly hurt me. He never had, regardless of how much he blamed himself for.

“O-O-Oh shit-” he whispered breathlessly between his moans. I felt him release the intensity of his hold as he stuttered out “I-I-I going to- to cum, Isiah, sh-should I pull out?” He was so sweet, and with my prior experience, everyone had just expected me to swallow. I shook my head no slightly, completely fine with milking him completely dry.

It was when I felt his hands loosen their hold on my hair that forced me to reach up and press them down further, and the look Dylan gave me made me squeeze my legs together tighter. I was leaking precum all over the damn place in my underwear, but by the grace of god I had chosen some black slacks this morning.

“I-I-Is this- is this o-okay?” He asked me fully breathless, and I squeezed my damn legs together even harder. I was now in the fight of my life to at least try not to cum. That would require a thorough wash of my slacks and no one wanted a wet crotch at school.

I gave Dylan a nod yes, urging those hands of his tighter, and he started to keep the pace of his thrusts inside my mouth, face fucking me. Because of his size, this was pretty uncomfortable, but getting to hear the unbelievably gritty groans he had began to release had me in literal fucking shambles.

I wasn’t going to last long at this rate.

Like at all.

“You- uh!

F-F-Fuck you’re so warm and tight. S-Seeing your- your face like this- fuck! You are so g-goddamn beautiful, Isiah-“ Dylan moaned through those rough grunts with his eyes locked in on absolutely nothing else but me, and that did it. For both of us. “Sh-Shit I’m- I’m about to- shi

shit! “ Right as he said that, I felt my own load squirt inside my briefs, just as Dylan’s rather massive load was forced down my throat by his thrusts.

Getting to finally see and hear him cum sent my orgasm into overdrive, the groans he fucking made were so deep I felt legitimately unreal pleasure coursing through my whole body. I hadn’t meant to cum, but it was alright. It would probably be a small load anyways , I thought, especially from how much I had jacked off from Saturday till today. The number of times were a bit much, but every time I thought of what happened Saturday morning, I got instantly hard again.

It was something I would never tell Dylan because I’d simply rather die, but he was the first to ever make me cum so damn fast and so hard , so much so that if he continued that goodbye kiss, I might’ve genuinely thought about us having sex that morning.

Now, apparently it didn’t matter where the hell we got intimate because a janitors closet was truly an insane choice…

And I would stand by these words until the end of time, because Dylan was just about zipping up his pants and I was checking out the damage I did in mine, when that closet door suddenly flew open without any warning.

“Yeah we’ve got some compressed air cans back here! I’ll check!” And when that all too familiar face caught sight of us- the completely wild state we were in with Dylan and myself just barely starting to catch our breath- their jaw dropped to the fucking floor.

••

30. Don’t Freak Out

Sorry y’all, my day job chewed me up and spat me out this week but I’m getting to updates now!

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Dylan

“Don’t freak out.”

“I’m-” Molly took in a huge puff of air. “I’m not- I’m just-”

Isiah and I could only watch as she continuously sprinted up then down those few steps of the bleachers we were currently sitting on for lunch, our eyes following her up… then down… then up again…

Honestly, I absolutely loved this girl… but after what happened in that closet, I just wanted more alone time with Isiah.

Scratch that, I wanted to leave this fucking place early with him. I wanted a mattress beneath him and me on top of him, exploring this thing between us a hell of a lot more.

“Molly,” Isiah called out, “you’re for sure freaking out.”

“Well,” she huffed again, “what the fuck are my options?! Usually the enemies to lovers plotline feeds into my preferred tropes but you two fucking in the janitors closet goes from zero to what the fuck so quickly I can’t even comprehend how we got here. Are you two- how long have you two been fuck-”

“We’re dating,” I replied, cutting Molly off before she could continue. This wasn’t a situationship or some shit, and if it took me wearing a sticker on my damn forehead to let everyone know that he was mine , I’d do it. I would tattoo it to my damn forehead if needed.

The way Isiah looked at me made the leg that was stretched out, touching his as we sat saddled on the bleachers, press his leg harder against the metal. I wanted to be alone with him right now, but Molly was going through it and we couldn’t just abandon her like this. Not when she resorted to exercising- a coping mechanism she was all too familiar with doing when something stressed her out.

“When did you two even find the damn time to get here with all this? School just started! Dylan just got back!”

“We, um…” Isiah’s voice trailed off a moment. “We sort of-…” Isiah then looked forward at me again, silently asking whether it was okay to tell Molly everything, and I just nodded. She was going to probably beat this information out of us at some point. honestly her burning all this energy on the bleachers was for the benefit of Isiah and I, otherwise we might’ve seen literal hands thrown. “We…. before Dylan um- before we left for Ireland, we might’ve uh-… well…”

“We kissed,” I finished explaining for this beautiful guy who’s face was getting redder and redder with every word he spoke. Honestly, after what we had just done in the janitors closet, I think admitting this to Molly was the most G rated thing we could’ve ever admitted, but Isiah was shy as all hell about it.

Something I found to be very fucking hot.

“You… you two… WHAT?!”

“We… kissed,” I explained again, which made Molly finally slow her steps to stop on the bleacher bench Isiah and I were straddling.

“W-W-Wha…. when- when did you two- when did you two even start liking each other?”

“I’ve been in-… I- I mean-…. I’ve… I’ve liked Dylan for years,” Isiah finally found his footing and some words for this conversation… kinda. And I was staring at him hard now.

Was he… was he about to say that-

“And you didn’t tell me?!” Molly demanded, turning to me now to direct that question my way.

“I… I- I didn’t….” I myself started, and words were quickly fleeing from my vocabulary. “Isiah didn’t- he didn’t tell me. W-We just kissed, then I left for Ireland the next day and didn’t hear from him for the year.” I was doing my best not to make Isiah feel like complete shit for this. I honestly didn’t want to hear another apology from him, I just wanted to move onto our relationship now. What mattered was what we did now, not back then.

“I swear to god I could smack you,” Molly turned back to Isiah when she said that, and the look of guilt in his eyes now made me reach my right hand forward to place it on his left thigh. I gave him a gentle squeeze which made Isiah’s face redder, but he smiled at me through whatever shame he was feeling. We were just two best friends who didn’t know how to react that night. That was it, that was all.

“We’re telling you now,” I reminded Molly. She remained huffing and puffing next to us over the wildly strenuous exercise she had just done, but the look she gave me told me to cut the shit.

“Does anyone else know?” This feisty woman demanded, to which Isiah and I quickly shook our heads, but mine stilled a moment later.

“Wait… I, uh, I told Danise this morning,” I admitted, my eyes finding their way back to Isiah’s quickly. I hadn’t meant to tell her, but not being able to talk about my feelings for Isiah with anyone else felt like literal fucking hell.

“Y-You… did?” Isiah asked me far more quietly.

“Y-Yeah, I’m-… I’m sorry, I should’ve asked you first but I just-… I’ve been really… well… I was really, uh… happy after this weekend… and not being able to see you outside of school this week sort of put me in a… mood , and she took notice and baked me some snickerdoodles to stop by and pick up before heading to school, and well, you know how weak I am to snickerdoodles, so when she asked I… I folded so damn quick it was a bit embarrassing.”

“You… That…” Isiah started, his sun-kissed skin getting brighter and brighter with that crimson color lifting to the surface of his face. “You um- you m-missed me… that much?”

My next words were a hell of a lot bolder than my last. “I-I’ve thought of you every fucking minute of each day, Isiah.”

And the look he gave me now wanted me to be completely alone with him. Now . I was already brainstorming how to tell Molly to fuck off somewhere while I took him down behind the bleachers to pretty much beg for more. It was otherwise somewhat empty out on this field anyways.

“Yeah, Dylan, it’s only fucking Wednesday! And just what happened between you two this weekend?”

“Isiah and I went out on our first date Friday night. I ended up sleeping over after.”

“Holy shit , your dad allowed it?” Molly asked as her eyes grew larger, staring dead at me.

“Allowed isn’t really a word I’d use,” Isiah more or less mumbled, probably still recalling that mess of a call I had with my dad Saturday morning.

“I think he genuinely forgot I existed until he needed his car the next day,” I explained. “My suspicions are that he and Carson spent the night doing… stuff. Stuff I rather not speak about. I secretly think he willingly forgot he was a father for the night, and with me being grounded I’ve unfortunately been home. Like a lot.”

“Oh ew .” Molly slowly shook her head.

“Yeah,” I sighed. “Anyways you don’t need the details Molly, my sex life is between Isiah and I.”

“But- but but but you promised that you would tell me when you lost your virginity! And hell, if not that, I would like to at least know just when the fuck you found out you weren’t straight!”

That was for sure a loaded request. “I… I don’t… I don’t really know what I am,” I replied honestly, and the nervous look Isiah gave me made me add to that statement with a swiftness. I didn’t like how unsure he seemed- he needed that reassurance from me. “All I know is that I like you, Isiah. I like being with you… being next to you… And when we- if we decide to um-… t-to uh… like to- to take things further, I’m pretty confident that I’ll like that too. I don’t have eyes for anyone else but you.”

The look Isiah gave me now just about solidified that my next words would be towards Molly, and I would be telling her to plainly just fuck off. I loved her, I really did… but right now, these words weren’t meant for her. And she’d remind me of just that with her next set towards me.

“So you mean to tell me that you two haven’t yet… and you’re acting like this still? All disgustingly sweet and shit? Jesus fucking Christ , I’m going to be sick of you both after you do, I just know it. You won’t even have to tell me when it happens, you two and all this stammering and flushed faces will give you away immediately.”

She wasn’t exactly wrong. Right now Isiah was practically undressing me with his eyes.

“What does Don think about all this? That fucking detective must’ve figured it out already.”

“I haven’t told him, and he sure as hell hasn’t addressed shit. All he knows is that I like Isiah.” I replied, which made Molly’s eyebrows raise slightly.

“H-He-… he knows?” Isiah asked me quietly, to which I slowly nodded. “Shit… I think he knows knows, then,” Isiah added. “I had, um… I had drunkenly told Carson how I felt about you the day you returned to school, and so he must’ve told Don. I’m pretty certain they tell each other literally everything…”

I could see the slight concern mixed into Isiah’s perfect features, so I shrugged immediately, hoping to shoulder some of those shitty nerves. “If he finds out, it’s fine. I’m an adult anyways, and he was the one who told me to be honest with you about how I felt. Now I want to choke him out for not saying anything about you liking me if he already knew, but he was probably just keeping your information private. It wasn’t his place to get involved like that, and you know how my dad can be.”

Isiah slowly nodded, allowing me to watch in real time as those nerves quickly settled.

“I think you two should probably officially tell them at some point. Maybe they’ll take pity on you guys and let you see each other more… Clearly you both need it because the sexual tension right now is actually insane . The way you two are looking at each other makes me feel like I’m interrupting something.”

“That’s because you are , Molly.” I was bold enough to reply with, squeezing Isiah’s thigh again lightly, which made Isiah’s face even redder as he tried to take a bit of the sandwich I had made for him. I had even cut an apple into slices, then used a small heart shaped cookie cutter to create little hearts. I was a bit embarrassed to give them to Isiah in front of Molly, but he snatched that Ziplock baggy up so fast as soon as he saw them in my hand, refusing to let me skate by with something so cheesy.

“Listen, you getting head in the janitors closet was not on my 2031 bingo card. Sue me. And I actually give a damn about you both you know, so how about we don’t do something like that on school grounds again?”

“Yes, mother ,” Isiah and I both said at the same time, causing us to crack a wicked grin at each other. Molly just scoffed.

“Good. And I expect you two to listen to me because it’s our senior year. Don’t throw your lives away like that before they’ve even begun.”

“You mean like how you’re about to throw your life away with this Halloween party? You’re future will be over before midterms,” Isiah shot back.

“ Alright, alright, alright , maybe I can’t be all that high and mighty… but everything will be fine, I promise,“ This insane girl tried to assure us. “Only like fifty people are going to be invited, and Ricky Trevors older brother has agreed to buy beer for it- the only booze I’m going to allow, so no hard stuff!”

“Molly… your logic is troubling,” I told my good friend who was currently sporting an everything will be fine smile that was somewhat startling to see. She was absolutely a dead man walking at this point.

“Well I just need you both to stay ungrounded so you can come! So don’t do anything stupid till then, alright?”

“ Yeah, yeah, yeah ,“ I more or less muttered. “I’ll only be there for moral support. You know I hate these things.”

Molly rolled her eyes at me, but nodded anyways.

“And the only reason I’m coming is because I like you, Molly, and I want to see my boyfriend in tights,” Isiah admitted, causing me to roll my eyes at that last part which made this handsome devil grin again.

Party’s weren’t really his thing either- I mean, well, they weren’t before this one year gap. I didn’t know if Isiah did a lot of partying during the year I was gone for. And I didn’t want to stress him out by asking about it. I was serious when I said that year was water under a bridge to us, and the only thing that really affected me anyways was the relationship he formed with Ryker while I was gone.

I liked it better when I didn’t know the two had been intimate with each other. Now it just… it made me worried.

Isiah had told me it was casual but… I just… I wish I had gotten to be his first too. First kiss. First person to hold hands with- to cuddle with. Had they already cuddled? Did they go on dates? What the hell could they have possibly even spoke about? I mean Ryker didn’t give a shit about anything, while Isiah had so much going for him that it physically pained me whenever he would put himself down, or suffered from some kind of imposters syndrome.

He had earned everything in his life.

He had worked hard for it with his own bare fucking hands, and sometimes I felt so goddamn inferior because I had access to the world with who my father was. Isiah only had whatever he could use to teach himself.

I wanted him to always know just how incredible he really was.

“ Yeah, yeah, yeah , you two are just too cool for partying or whatever. You should know that it’ll be unsupervised, and as a token of my generosity for the love and kindness you both are showing, I’ll give you the key to my bedroom that night. I’ll just have to burn the sheets the following morning or whatever.“

That made both Isiah and myself sigh. Deeply .

“Molly,” Isiah offered for the both of us, “you have the bedroom of a five year old young girl. I promise you, nothing is happening in there.”

“Well it’s not my fault my parents paid an insane amount of money to have rainbows painted on my hot pink walls eons ago, and refuse to change it!” Molly shot back in an effort to defend herself.

“Molly…” I sighed again, not even sure how to put this, “you have been collecting squishmallows for the last ten years. Your bed is like a sea of stuffed animals.”

Molly looked away, avoiding my gaze now in well earned shame.

“And before that,” Isiah chimed in, “it was Webkinz. I don’t think even the most sexual deviant of a person could do a damn thing in that room besides talk about its… wonders .” That last word sounded more haunting than anything.

“Okay so maybe it’s a bit…. kid-like,” Molly replied as she started to come around to our descriptions. Kid-like was an understatement, and the way she refused to look at me told me that she knew it too. She even had a little hamster in a hot pink cage which she named Hamtaro after the animation. The thing hated everyone but her so I never let her take it out of its cage when I was over, yet still, it added to the ancient year that room was successfully trapped in.

“It’s concerning,” Isiah clarified. “Has any guy ever seen it? Besides Dylan and I?”

“ Fuck no,“ Molly muttered. “I would never hear the end of it.”

“ And rightfully so ,“ I muttered. Molly should not have been able to get away with something like that for this long. At school she was pretty popular, friends with pretty much everyone, but at home she was carrying whole ass conversations with her stuffed animals which she knew by name.

How so many guys were absolutely infatuated with her honestly blew me. Like I understood, but as soon as they ever had the chance to see that bedroom, there was no way the relationship was lasting.

“I’ll… I’ll put them all in my closet for you guys- the stuffed animals,” Molly tried to reason, which made Isiah and I both chuckle.

“There isn’t enough space and you know it. I don’t even understand how you sleep with all that on your bed,” this perfect guy in front of me inquired seriously.

“I like to… cuddle them at night,” Molly damn near whispered.

“Somehow that’s worse,” I replied, which caused Isiah’s already settling grin to only grow when his eyes found mine.

I barely paid my own lunch any attention, but Isiah was almost done with his sandwich now. I just wanted to sit here and watch him eat it, it was a new combination I had tried with prosciutto and gouda cheese. Isiah had really changed a lot of his diet, so I went with 10 grain bread and added arugula to balance the meats and cheese.

The look on his face at that first bite earlier made my heart do things she had no fucking business doing. I almost kissed him silly right then and there, forgetting that Molly was right here, running up and down the damn bleachers and insisting that she was fine. That everything was fine.

“Listen, you say all this now, but come Halloween night we’ll see how you two really feel. All I ask is that none of my stuffed animals are touched while you two do the nasty. Got it?”

All me and this handsome guy could do was sigh. Deeply .

But there was a part of me… a very small part that thought about being alone with Isiah dressed as Beast Boy.

A part that might actually do the unthinkable if the moment presented itself:

Accept the offered time alone with him in Molly’s nightmare inducing bedroom.

••

31. Beast Boy And Raven

Isiah

Don ended up giving Dylan a resounding no for me coming over, because apparently Dylan’s room looked like it was ransacked by thieves and he ensured Dylan that he was absolutely going to fix it by tonight otherwise he was extending his sentence with being grounded.

Don did agree to Friday though so that was a win, we just had to suffer through another day- with me trying my goddamn best not to even look at Dylan for too long in classes. Molly’s shit about us just making it through our final year strong with no ISS or detention actually stuck with me; I didn’t really have the opportunity to throw any opportunities away when it came to graduation and scholarships. Not financially, anyway. I genuinely had to be on my best behavior, and with the way things were looking, I actually had a shot at being a valedictorian.

Molly now knew, too.

About Dylan and I…

Which was… something.

It was definitely something , that’s for sure.

She honestly took it about as well as she probably could’ve, running up and down those bleachers and all, and I was grateful for that because I hadn’t quite spoken with Dylan about the whole coming out thing. I’d handle school shit just fine if he wanted to go fully public here, but if my mum found out, I didn’t even know how to begin to start that conversation with her. Like what the hell was I supposed to say?

I had a pretty solid bond with my mum, especially after Dylan got back from Ireland and he and I became cool again… then more than just cool… but we never talked about any of this before. I had never brought up a single relationship to her, and that was because none were ever remotely worth it till now.

I honestly didn’t even know what I was nervous about because it wasn’t like my mum would care if it was a guy instead of a girl; her closest friends were literally Carson and Don, as well as Carson’s Mums, but I did wonder how she’d fare once she found out it was Dylan of all people… the person I was dating. The person I was so madly in love with but didn’t have the balls to tell him.

That part had me stressed the fuck out.

I thought it was super fucking cute how Dylan insisted he make lunch for me again come Thursday. For the second time ever, Wednesday being the first, we allowed Molly to join us on the bleachers, but Dylan wasn’t paying attention to anything but the first few bites of the gnocchi he had made for me all by himself.

And it was so fucking incredible that I decided for a brief moment, I was going to ignore the pacing Molly was doing up and down these steps again right beside us, and reached forward to snake my right hand around Dylan’s slender neck before I pulled him in for the briefest of kisses.

I had made sure there wasn’t anyone else on the field before doing it… but once I moved to pull away and Dylan started pressing me backwards onto the bleacher bench we were straddling, I knew I had fucked up.

“W-Wait- D-Dyl-” I stuttered out against his lips as he simply hovered over our lunches with his giant self, deepening what should have been a brief kiss using the softness of his irresistible fucking lips. He was starting to make me shiver.

“ A little more ,“ he murmured, his words molding into this kiss, but I was forced to nudge him back before sitting us both up quickly. That deep as shit voice of his was absolutely going to ask for more than just a little , and I wasn’t folding for his antics here. Not… not now . Not when we had only a thirty minute lunch together, and Molly was still pacing up and down the damn bleachers, trying to cope with all this.

“Molly,” I spoke up, attempting to distract myself from Dylan, “y-you’re the one who insisted to join Dylan and I today. Are you going to actually communicate your thoughts, or was this a free gym period session you finessed Dylan and I into morally supporting?” I asked the one person here who was absolutely preventing me from at least slipping away behind the bleachers for a bit with this handsome man across from me.

He was now looking at me like he was two seconds away from pushing me back onto this metal bench yet again .

I had noticed that there weren’t any heart shaped apple slices today with the lunch he made me, but he did slice up strawberries, and each one looked exactly like a heart, which made this smile of mine impossible to get rid of. It also made any additional advances he decided to do, practically impossible to resist.

I loved the way Dylan liked me. He made me a gushy fucking wreck , just leaving my composure in shambles all while he hit me with the most beautiful smiles. It was still so fucking surreal to know that this was actually mine. He was actually mine.

“This Halloween party is stressing me the hell out,” Molly muttered between gasps for air. She had started hitting those stairs even harder after the kiss I gave Dylan that he had began to take full advantage of. I knew Molly was still coming to terms with all this, but I had to admit that it felt nice being affectionate with Dylan in front of someone. Now did I think we needed to give her a whole freaking show? Absolutely the hell not. Dylan just-… I was coming to terms with the fact that he honestly didn’t give a shit. If he wanted to kiss me, he was going to find a way to.

And I’d be lying straight through my fucking teeth if I said I didn’t find that so goddamn hot. I had been so worried that I was far too obsessed to handle this new relationship with a little grace… but the way Dylan hadn’t pumped the breaks on anything yet made me freaking feral .

Never in a million years had I thought that I would be the one trying to slow things down between him and I if we ever got into a relationship, but after what we did in that closet together, I needed a little time to adjust- to find a way where Dylan and I could explore more without us getting suspended or expelled our final year.

Dylan had damn near broke me shortly before lunch, when we were in Chem together. I hadn’t expected him to turn to me slightly as we sat right next to each other, whispering, “ I think we should find another closet. I want to try what you did to me yesterday .“

It was safe to say that I almost fell out of my fucking chair, damn near abandoning all the work we had put in for the final touches of our project because I almost took the school-provided laptop down with me.

“D-Dylan,” I had whispered back coarsely once I gathered my bearings. “P-Please don’t… l-let’s not talk about that right now,” I insisted, to which he did nod… but the way he was looking at me made my whole body shiver with need. Dylan genuinely just didn’t give a shit, but I could tell that he respected my need to keep a perfect record.

“What are you two going as again?” Molly asked us once her steps slowed on the bleachers.

“Raven and Beast Boy from Teen Titans,” Dylan explained, though that gaze never left mine. He was fully locked in as I ate more of the lunch he made, and I was trying to divert my gaze but it was no use.

I liked watching his eyes on me like this. And the man had even whipped up a mango smoothie which he convinced the lunch ladies to store in a fridge so it was fully fresh and chilled by lunch time.

It… it was safe to say I was falling so fucking hard for this man it wasn’t even funny. It was never funny, but now I was starting to develop feelings I didn’t even know how to express.

“Are you going to paint your skin?” Molly asked seriously. “Cause if so-” she took a deep inhale, still catching up with her breaths, “I will be removing every last stuffed animal from a 50 mile radius of you. You can fuck up my sheets all you want, but my babies are not to be touched.”

“That’s probably for the best,” I answered Molly quickly. While having a little space where Dylan and I could retreat to if our social batteries ran low was great and all… Molly’s bedroom was genuinely a hot fucking mess. I loved her, but every time I had come over, her room left me with more questions than answers.

“I’ll be honest… when I think of sexy , those outfits aren’t the first thing that come to mind. Like was firefighter or cop unavailable?” This gal questioned.

“Isiah doesn’t like wearing the color yellow, and we both don’t like law enforcement,” Dylan explained as he finally took his first bite of his own serving of gnocchi. “So no, those were never an option.”

I found myself getting all fucking frazzled immediately . Dylan… he knew so much of me, I swear to god. He made me want to orchestrate a date night where we just wrote as many things we knew about each other down to really test ourselves, and maybe see if anything had changed in the last year. There was nothing that had me literally drooling more that the fact that Dylan was always listening- always making note of shit.

He knew me in ways I had never presented myself to anyone else, and that level of intimacy… it was intense for me, to say the least.

“So how the fuck did we end up on Teen Titans?” Molly asked.

“Saturday morning cartoons when they were still a thing,” I answered, earning me one awfully scorching hot look from Dylan. He was just about ready to kick Molly out of this little get together himself, but I glanced down at his lunch as a sign to at least suggest we play more cordially.

“Isiah would make a perfect Beast Boy,” Dylan insisted. “And I think I could rock Raven-”

“Will you wear tights?” I interrupted, because I still wasn’t over this discussion.

“Will you… would you like… like that- if-”

“Yes,” I replied immediately. “yes times a hundred. Scratch that, times a thousand

• a million
• I don’t know, just fucking yes, “ I rushed out, making Dylan chuckle immediately, pressing his leg hard against my own that was rested next to his off to the side of this bench, but Molly just scoffed.

“ You’re robbing us of the most attractive fits now that you both started working out! “ Our good friend whined.

“What we wear isn’t for you,” Dylan answered simply, which honestly made my skin turn bright fucking red, and he seemed to pick up on it because he was staring harder. Much harder. At this point I didn’t know what the hell to do anymore. If he did anything, I was folding. Quickly.

God, I just wanted to be alone with him right now …

“Well, like yes… but Teen Titans?” Molly asked again, which made both Dylan and I roll our eyes.

“And what are you going to be, Ms. Unsatisfied?” I asked her teasingly.

“I’m going to be Lara Croft,” she answered immediately as she caught her breath, finally taking a seat on the next bench below us..

“Do you have the pointy boobs for it?” Dylan asked way out of left field which made me abruptly chuckle.

“I’m talking about the 2018 movie . No pointy boobs required,” Molly explained, making Dylan sigh.

“That’s not the Lara Croft we recognize,” I tried to explain to Molly, but she just shrugged my boyfriend’s disappointment off.

“You two are the hardest to please, I swear to fucking god,” this young gal muttered.

“You’re talking to a couple who has played the original Tomb Raider extensively and watch the Angelina Jolie movies unironically ,” Dylan reminded her, which had me cheesing like an goddamn idiot. The way he defended the shit we liked was honestly such a turn on it wasn’t even funny.

And he had… he had called us a couple… like I knew we were now, but fuck . The way I looked at him was far too heated, and once he started to lower the Tupperware of his lunch, I had to look away. I just knew he was going to pull some shit that was going to secure us alone time one way or another.

“You two are the worst,” Molly sighed, “And I’m not strong enough to get through the nerves of throwing this party without my parents knowing so I really need you both to be supportive right now,” Molly insisted which had Dylan and I conceding our usual cynical takes.

“You got this,” Dylan assured her with a smile. “But I’ll be honest… Isiah and I do these lunches alone for a reason, so if you want us to keep our comments to ourselves… you might have better luck after lunch,” he reminded Molly, yet his words had the slightest bit of an edge to them, and once my eyes met his again, I could see the marginal irritation on his face now.

Time wasn’t on our side, and our lunch had been interrupted for two days straight at this point, but I just gave him a warm, reassuring smile which relaxed that edge. I knew he wanted us to be alone since we had barely got any time this week to, but Molly also needed some of this support. She was a mess, but she was our mess, ya know?

“Ugh. I’m in distress, Dylan ,” she whined, and I just knew Dylan wanted to ask her whose fault that was but he held that comment back.

“Would you like some help decorating?” I heard him offer instead. “If you don’t mind Isiah and I crashing at yours I think we could come the day of to help set things up, then leave the morning after,” Dylan insisted. Then he turned his head quickly to me. “Only if you want to, of course. Might be easiest if we do end up drinking.”

I gave him an immediate nod. Judging by how little Dylan and I actually liked parties, I also thought we’d much prefer the time spent before and after, when we didn’t have to converse with a bunch of people.

Molly was friends with everyone it felt like, which was why Dylan and I were skeptical about the head count in the first place. Someone was bound to tell someone else who would then tell someone else, and so on and so forth, until the whole thing spiraled out of control.

My leg shifted itself to brush up against Dylan’s, further reassuring him, but he must’ve taken it for more than it was because his next words were “Molly… do you need us for anything else or are you cool with leaving? Because Isiah and I are in the fight of our lives to get some alone time here while I’m still grounded, and I don’t plan on holding myself back any longer for the next five minutes or so, so…”

Molly looked at him like he had lost his mind, but she held some words at bay herself. “I cannot believe you’re acting like this,” she murmured. “I swear I have never seen you this sexually charged. Blink twice if you need saving, Isiah.”

“ I love it, “ I uttered quickly, bringing Dylan’s eyes to mine as I finally registered what I said. “I-… I mean… I like that he likes me the way I like him. And… well… I um… yeah the alone time would be nice, Molly. N-No offense.”

But before any of us could say anything else, we all heard the bell to dismiss this lunch period, and while Molly offered up a sincere apology for using up the one period Dylan and I got to ourselves yet again , I could see the annoyance in Dylan’s eyes. He wasn’t necessarily pissed at Molly, but he sure as all hell was irritated that we didn’t get more time between us.

And I was too, honestly. I wanted to speak with him about how open he wanted to be about this. Were we telling our parents? And if so, when? Was he okay with me asking him to certain things this year, like homecoming and prom? I literally had a list in my journal just fantasizing of all the ways I would ask him over the years if by some chance we actually got together, and now I was already spiraling just thinking of the ones to go with. Everything had to be perfect.

I had so many goddamn questions and it felt like I was just sitting with potential answers.

I wanted for nothing more than to have more time alone to talk about us, but we had no choice but to start packing our lunch up. Dylan insisted I take one more bite, which I did, but when the creamy white sauce dripped from the fork to my chin as I rushed to bring the bite to my mouth, Dylan didn’t fucking hesitate to reach over and clean it off with his thumb. At this point I had to look away because watching him suck that sauce off it just about did it for me. I was already too weak for this shit.

“Isiah,” Dylan mumbled quietly while Molly already started her sprint down these bleachers. She had to book it to the other side of the school for her next class, so we let the poor woman go without any formal goodbyes.

“Hmm?” I mumbled quietly, trying not to meet this ridiculously handsome guy’s far more heated gaze.

“Meet me at my car… after school,” he more or less ordered in that deep, raspy voice of his… and I was fully ashamed by how quickly I nodded in return.

••

32. Ask Yourself What He’s Giving

4.2k words on this one cause I love y’all

I’m off to edit TSOE next and get that up, then I’ll edit Substack for the rest

I do have to work today though so there will be a 4 hour break somewhere in the mix lol

Enjoy!

xoxo

Dylan

Suggesting that Isiah meet me at my car after school was impulsive… but good god , going through each day this week with having to focus on school while my eyes wandered back to him, was actually the most intricate form of torture this new found relationship and senior year could bestow upon me.

I practically ran through my following classes on Thursday, just trying to brainstorm what the gameplan actually was for what I offered.

I knew I just wanted to be alone with him, and it wasn’t just because of my need to touch him without constantly second guessing whether it was actually okay.

It was also because I wanted to know what was okay. What he did and didn’t want me to do in front of others. Molly so far was the only one at school who knew about us, and that had clearly been a whole experience in itself. I knew I didn’t care who knew, but there was some hesitancy behind Isiah’s eyes at the bleachers today, and that made me a bit hesitant myself.

I hadn’t meant to push him, obviously. It was just that I didn’t like overthinking whether I was starting to stare too hard in class where people could notice, or if I was saying the right things around others while with him. Isiah and I were used to staying in our own world together, but now that things were… more , I found myself wanting to exist in that world far more often than this one. Reality.

This prison sentence I was locked in with with my dad would be over soon, and I’d be able to text and call Isiah whenever I wanted to. I could talk to him for hours like we used to, and just maintain that communication, because it was genuinely what made school and home far more fucking bearable.

Right now, I felt like I was in solitary hell whenever school was over and I had to drive home, regardless of how early he and I were getting here in the mornings just to see each other.

I knew I was almost free of this corporal punishment soon, which was why I was now trying to calculate how much time I had with Isiah this afternoon before I genuinely had to head home to figure out my homework. Pops was starting to head home earlier with Carson this week, both of them insisting we make sure to get some family time in even if we all sat together doing our own thing.

John would be back in town on Monday too, flying in with Derek because of some schedule rearrangements, and I think my dad and Carson were milking the calm before that shit show of a storm.

By the time I made it out of last period, having to hang back with my teacher to resubmit a paper, I was booking it to my car immediately . And when I finally stepped outside and saw Isiah standing there near my dad’s car, his body leant against the passenger side, his backpack slung over one shoulder as he looked down at his phone, my heart picked up practically in an instant.

Today he had worn the faded ripped jeans on the lighter blue side, with that signature black leather jacket that fucking made me salivate at the mere sight of. I had noticed he usually kept the jacket off during school these days, and though he had those new tattoos, he had kept them covered for the most part with longer sleeves.

I, for one, wanted to see far, far more. I mean, I just wanted him to wear whatever he was comfortable in of course, but I also didn’t mind when he wore the short sleeves that showed off his newly developed muscular arms… or the long sleeved leather jacket that made his faded sides and sharply shaved slits into his hair all the more wildly defined.

“Hi,” I rushed out quickly as soon as I made it to him, and Isiah looked up from his phone in an instant.

“Hi,” he replied with a stellar smile as he slid his phone into his pocket without a second thought. I could already see the slight blush spreading across his face at whatever we were about to do, and that made this for me all the more intense.

I had decided that I’d drive us to Richmond Park, and we could spend an hour there talking… alone .

But seeing Isiah now and watching as those perfect eyes met mine made me want to push him into the back seat of this car for a second. I just wanted to kiss him, and with students pouring out of the school, booking it to their own vehicles to get the hell out of here, we weren’t exactly alone .

Before I could say anything else, however, I heard the rumbling of a car which unexpectedly pulled up right in front of my parked one, forcing both Isiah and myself to look over at it from the passenger side. And when I caught sight of just who it was, I felt my irritation start to bubble up. Jesus, this man had the worst fucking timing.

“Izzy, let’s roll,” Ryker spoke as soon as that drivers side window rolled down all the way, pushing out the smoke from his cigarette. I could see the black eye he know had on his left eye, and I honestly couldn’t help but think that he probably got it picking a fight he had no business picking. Ryker was just that kind of a fucking guy.

I felt pretty confident at first about Isiah and I’s afternoon plans, but once I glanced back at my beautiful boyfriend, the deep rooted look of regret on his face made all that confidence simply fade into the distance.

“I-… I am so fucking sorry, Dylan,” Isiah sighed as he looked up at me. “I completely forgot that Ryker was going to drive me home this afternoon, and when you… when you asked at the bleachers today, I…”

I could only feel my irritation grow. Not for Isiah of course, but for the delinquent sitting in his car to my right, staring at my boyfriend expectantly. I had to calm myself down in this moment because it wasn’t Isiah’s fault. I had sprung all this up on him over lunch just a couple hours ago without planning anything.

“I wasn’t even thinking,” he admitted to me. “I just… I wanted to be alone with you .” He all but whispered that last part so Ryker couldn’t hear it, and I found myself wanting- needing to close this distance between his lips and mine. I wanted to just- to feel him against me right now, and I for damn sure wanted to show Ryker that Isiah was absolutely taken. That he was spoken for now, and that the friends with benefits part of their friendship was not a thing anymore between them.

But then that also reminded me that they were… friends.

Isiah was his own person. He had a right to friends regardless of how I felt… and so, I found myself nodding, giving Isiah a reassuring smile of my own before I leant in.

I could see the slight panic in Isiah’s eyes as I drew closer, probably thinking I might actually be batshit crazy enough to kiss him in front of all these people, including Ryker, but I just brought these lips closer to his right ear, hiding my face from Ryker and the entrance of the school as I whispered to him, “I want to be alone with you, too… but I understand. And Ryker is your friend. Just… j-just promise me I’ll get to have you tomorrow-”

Before I could even finish, Isiah whispered near my ear quickly “I promise. A-And j-just for the record… you trusting me, it… it… thank you . I would never do anything to hurt you, Dylan-”

But before he could say anything else, I quietly shushed him, feeling the deepest shiver run through him when my lips grazed the lobe of his ear. “ Say anything else and I’ll be forced to kidnap you Isiah. “

“I-…” His voice was dry and raspy as he spoke now, matching my own rougher, deep tone. “ I wouldn’t mind being tied up if it was you. “ He teased gently.

Those words alone forced my hand right past his leather jacket to the side of his waist, pushing him back against my dad’s car. “ Not another word , Isiah… or I’m throwing you into the back seat of this damn car right now. Got it?“

Isiah shivered deeply yet again, but I could feel his head nodding against me which forced me to pull away, removing my hand from his slender waist before I seriously did something that he and I had not discussed before. It wasn’t my place to out us in front of everyone regardless of how utterly fucking kissable Isiah looked when my eyes found his again and that perfect fucking face of his ran flushed to the gods.

“I-I-I’ll-” he then stuttered out, looking at no one else but me. “I-I’ll see you tomorrow. E-Early morning. I… I could come down to-… t-to meet you at your car so we can… talk.”

That alone gave me the literal strength I needed not to start begging Isiah to say no to Ryker, and I nodded at this fucking gorgeous man quickly, allowing him to finally leave the little intimate bubble we had created for ourselves, and head around Ryker’s car towards the passenger side. He looked back at me as he opened the door, and I mustered up a warm smile, to which he happily met.

I knew I was being a jealous asshat, but my smile couldn’t help but drop once my eyes found Ryker’s again and he gave me a slight wave. Something I sure as all hell didn’t return. I watched as he peeled off a second later withe my boyfriend, and I was left to climb into my own vehicle alone, unable to shake that jealousy regardless of how much I knew it wasn’t my place to get like this.

Isiah liked that I trusted him.

And I did trust him.

It was just that I absolutely did not trust Ryker. The percentage of trust I had in him was about as low as his GPA, and Isiah honestly deserved to be around people who always had his best interest in mind. Still, I reminded myself as I carefully pulled out of the school’s parking lot, it wasn’t my place to dictate who Isiah chose to be around. I didn’t want him to feel controlled like that- that was never our friendship before all this.

But then again… we had never really gotten close with anyone before besides Molly and each other.

This was… new.

It was safe to say that once I got home, I was back in another one of my moods. Hell, the drive home was just the enemy of progressing, adding lighter fluid to the fire that was my jealousy as I drove in silence and meditated on these thoughts.

To my surprise, I came home to my good ol’ Pops and Carson already home. I knew this because Carson’s SUV was parked in the underground parking once I pulled in. And this simple surprise actually helped with my jealousy because had Isiah and I gone to the park, my dad would’ve known immediately that I was taking a detour somewhere.

Maybe it was divine intervention , I thought as I made my way into the underground entrance of the high rise, and used my dad’s fob to take the elevator up to the penthouse floor. That shaved a bit of the edge off my mood, just enough to face my dad and Carson, but as soon as I opened the front door, I realized I probably wasn’t going to be in the mood for anything.

“Hey kiddo,” my dad spoke, looking over at the door for a fraction of a second once I let myself in, before he returned his eyes to one of the like four monitors on his desk. Carson was in the kitchen, and looked like he was prepping something for dinner.

“Hi Dad,” I nodded over at him as I kicked my shoes off and set my backpack down near the entrance.

“How was school, bossman?” Carson asked me from the kitchen, but once his eyes found mine, that smile of his faltered slightly. He knew I was in one of my moods immediately. “Looks like it drained the hell out of you,” he then noted. “I’m prepping for some lentil soup… but we could order pizza if you’d like.”

That got my dad’s attention in a nanosecond, who swiftly shifted his sharp gaze to Carson. “ Like hell we fucking are. “

“Come on , baby,” Carson insisted. “Lentil soup sounds like additional torture for a kid his age.”

“You two haven’t had it yet. Your lack of faith in my recipe is entirely unwarranted,” my dad snapped, but his gaze returned to his monitors. I could tell this work-from-home idea was probably Carson’s because my dad was plugging away at his keyboard a thousand words a minute, purely irritated now.

“We’ll have it tomorrow,” Carson reassured him. “I’m not over here slaving over this meal prepping for nothing. And trust me, love, your recipes have never steered us wrong before. I’ve got nothing but faith it’ll be amazing.”

That seemed to finally do it for my father, because all I heard was grumbling and a few curses muttered while I, myself, beelined it towards my bedroom.

At risk of sounding like a melodramatic teenager if front of my parents, I refrained from telling them that I honestly wasn’t in the mood to eat anything, pizza or otherwise. Right now I wanted to lay in bed, forget I had a shit ton of homework to do, and listen to the most depressing music on repeat while I contemplated life.

Yes, it was overkill, but it would be comforting at the very least.

So I closed my bedroom door, stripped down and changed into some comfy lounging clothes, and crawled right into bed. “Alexa, play Nothing by The Weeknd,” I mumbled to my speaker, before relaxing this aching head of mine into my comfortable pillow.

I thought about whether this was going to be my final place of rest, listening to the most moody music as sleep soon took hold of me…

But this relaxation didn’t last long at all. In fact, only about an hour into this light nap, I heard a knock on my door which woke me up again. I tried to wipe the sleep from my eyes as I called out “come in!” to whoever it was. My guess was that it was Carson, because my dad seemed way too busy this afternoon, but to my surprise, it was good ol’ Pops.

“Dad,” I spoke, still sleepy as I sat up in bed. “Alexa, stop playing,” I then ordered my Bluetooth speaker so I could hear whatever had warranted this visit.

“I can feel the despair thickening the air,” my dad replied with pure disgust as he entered my room. “What the hell is it now, kiddo?” He then asked me.

Talk about one loaded question.

“You have been sulking one day, then ecstatic the next, then sulking the day after that and I, for one, don’t have the fucking bandwidth to deal with both this shit, and Carson getting needier than usual because John is coming to town next week, which will bog down our usual schedule by a considerable amount. So for the love of god , what is it now?”

I couldn’t help but sigh as I watched my dad take a seat at the end of my bed, near my tucked in legs. I had grown so tall in the last year, dad was already talking about switching my queen mattress out for a king because sleeping on it now made it feel a bit small. My legs almost dangled off the thing even when I had them bent.

“Have you ever been jealous before?” I asked my father.

He looked at me like I had just asked him a question regarding the meaning of life, and I could almost practically see that he was regretting coming in here as a whole.

“Uh…” he took a moment to collect his thoughts. “…Sort of? Not really of a person, I mean sometimes I’m jealous of when Carson heads to New Jersey and gets to eat at La Belle without me… but I mean, you’ve seen Carson. Witnessed him with your own two eyes the last eight years. He’s the one who gets jealous far more often, and of the most absurd shit, which is stupid because I have never given him a reason to,” my dad replied.

Great , I couldn’t help but think. I might’ve been chatting with the wrong dad here .

“But what’s got you jealous?” my dad asked me. “Is everything okay with you and Isiah?”

“Yeah,” I nodded quickly. “It’s just that… well, when we were away for the year, Isiah made another friend. This is going to sound really stupid-”

“ It already does ,“ my father interjected with a sigh, “but I’m already here so continue, I guess.”

“ Well ,“ I gave my dad a little sass, even though I was sure this was not what he had planned for his afternoon after work. “I hate the guy. Like out of everyone Isiah could’ve chose, I genuinely hate this one. He’s arrogant, a jackass, a complete slacker, usually suspended from school- like how are you suspended the first week of classes? How the complete fuck -”

“Language,” Dad reminded me, but I just about almost rolled my eyes. I swear he threw that word in at the most random of times even though he swore like a goddamn sailor. At least Carson tried to hold some more of his explicit language back around me, but my dad? Lord forbid he was even slightly inconvenienced. The words that could fall past his lips honestly stunned me at times by the eloquence.

“I just don’t get it,” I grumbled irritably. “What could he possibly be getting from that guy that he doesn’t get from me?”

I looked away from my dad because I knew I was being a child, but his next words brought my gaze right back to him. “Have you ever asked yourself what Isiah is giving? “

I was a bit taken aback by that question, successfully stunning me into silence and allowing his words to marinate.

“With friendships, it’s natural to think that you could be it all- especially with how close you and Isiah are, right?” I found myself nodding at that. “But Isiah? He was the first kid I felt comfortable with you hanging around because of how caring he is. How caring his family is. And that kind of care, Dylan, it’s not meant to be directed towards just one person. Carson and his family taught me that, and I’m pretty fucking sure that they taught you that too, didn’t they? Or were you too obtuse to pay attention?”

I was forced to look away again. Mostly in shame, because they did. They had taught me that, and on so many occasions that my father calling me out like this was painful, but necessary. If the Jones were in a position to give, they always gave.

“That fucking idiot in the living room currently putting in our pizza order once told me that being able to love so openly is what emotional intelligence is.” My father told me.

I always found it sweet how harsh my father’s words could be, yet how it was genuinely a facade covering all the love he himself had for said idiot ordering us dinner. Even when Carson wasn’t here for this conversation… his teachings were. That was the kind of love I wanted to find and build on.

“If you have a cup to pour from, then you should pour into those that need it most . At your age, kids like that- like Isiah… they’re a dime a dozen. Isiah’s parent raised him to help those that need him. And kids like the friend he’s now made… they often times act that way because their personal lives lack the stability needed to create an environment in which they can thrive in.”

I felt that pang of shame again from those words alone. My father was once again reminding me of the privilege I had now, all whilst reminding me of the lack of stability I had then…. before I found my father.

“Instead of asking what you lack , perhaps you should be seeing what it is Isiah is drawn to- what he might be helping with if he’s in the position to. I think there might be more similarities between him and his friend than you see at surface level, and above all else, kiddo… remember how lonely it must have been for Isiah for this last year. Remember how lonely it was for you, even while surrounded by family in one of the world’s most beautiful countries.”

…Shit.

Shit .

I fucking hated whenever my dad was so right.

Instead of judging Isiah for who he had chosen while I was gone, somehow my dad had made me just fall for him even harder. I had thought about all this like Ryker poisoning Isiah’s mind and endangering him by who the reckless kid was… but that was discrediting Isiah and the heart I knew he had.

That simple thought made me feel disgusted with myself.

“Here,” my dad sighed as he stretched out his hand. “Hand me your phone.”

At first that brought on instant worry as I processed his words, and I started replaying the last two weeks, thinking about whether I had done anything for my father to full on take my phone away, but good ol’ Pops must’ve felt that because he added, “I’m not revoking the fucking thing. Just hand it over. Quickly. I don’t have all fucking day.”

So I buried my hands behind me under my pillow to feel around for it, before passing it over to him. Then I watched as he unlocked it and started typing something into it, before handing it back to me.

When I took the thing back and looked down at the screen, it was prompting me to enter my own Apple ID information in, which made my eyes snap back up to my fathers quickly. “You-… you…”

“Your prison sentence has been served, my little felon. Now call the kid and resolve whatever feelings you’ve got before dinner. Got it?” he asked me, which I quickly nodded with one massively growing smile.

“Thanks dad,” I told him with every bit of earnestly in my voice. “For… for everything . You always know just what to say even if you can’t relate to what I’m feeling.”

My dad just gave me a warm smile as he stood up from the bed, and walked closer to give my long, shaggy curls a good ruffle with his massive hand. Then he bent down to place a gentle kiss on my forehead.

“If I wasn’t so hellbent on getting the fuck out of my own dad’s home when I was younger, I might’ve ended up just like Ryker. You should think about that, alright?” I gave him another nod, understanding far more now.

I may have hated how Ryker was at school… but I didn’t know him. Truly know him. I only knew what it was I saw- what he chose to show.

The person I did know like the back of my hand, however, was Isiah.

And he had a gentle kindness to him that a year apart between us thankfully didn’t sour, that much I was sure.

“I love you, Daddio.” I told my father who was already starting to retreat back towards my bedroom door, clearly over this conversation as a whole.

“And I love you, my fucking mess of a child,” my dad replied as he turned back towards me. “I told you we’d face it all together, and if I’m nothing else, you know I’m a man of my word.”

I found myself nodding once again. His word had always been his bond, something that gave me so much stability because I knew I could always trust it. Him. For better or worse.

“So ease up on the dramatics, and come eat when you’re done whether you feel like it or not. CPS might not be a threat anymore since you’re of legal age to fuck off wherever, but making sure you eat slows the greying of my hair. And you owe me that fucking much for keeping you alive this goddamn long.”

••

33. Firsts

Well well well

We are back in business baby, I’m getting things updated now. I’ve been sick as shit with migraines the whole last week but I think we’re better

Enjoy!

xoxo

Warning: Explicit Content

Isiah

“He hit you again?” I asked Ryker, accepting the cigarette he passed to me as he drove. I noticed he was heading towards the park instead of my home, but I didn’t protest it.

If I had to rain check Dylan like that, I might as well get the whole story about Ryker’s eye, and a free cigarette in the process. I was already in a mood by how Dylan looked when I had to leave him, but I did genuinely care about Ryker’s situation, and even if our with benefits part was absolutely, without a doubt, unequivocally off the table, especially now that I was actually seeing Dylan, I didn’t want him to think he couldn’t talk to me when he needed.

I just… I needed Dylan to trust me- trust the fact that there was nothing I’ve fucking wanted more than to be with that tall, irresistibly handsome man. Only him. And I had felt that way for years, almost a decade at this point whether I knew it way back then or not.

“Yeah. Drunk again. Probably high. Thought I stole his tool box or some bullshit. It’s whatever though, I’m used to it by now.”

“This isn’t something you should be used to, man,” I reminded him more gently. “Your father’s got his own shit going on but that doesn’t give him the right to take it out on you.”

“Listen, Izzy,” Ryker spoke as he drove. I knew he had to be taking years off this beater, whipping this car around like this, but then again, he’d been working on cars since he could practically walk. Whatever issues came up with it, it was nothing for him to pop the hood and take a look. “My best bet is working at the shop after school. He’s got anger issues, but it’s nothing I can’t take.”

I slowly shook my head no, unable to accept that, but also unable to really speak my mind. The best I could do was just be there for Ryker. We weren’t fooling around anymore which I knew he was pissed at me for, but that didn’t negate the fact that for the last year he and I were close in more ways than just sexually. If he needed someone to just distract him, someone to shoot the shits with, I was willing to be there.

It was just a fine line between being a friend, and having him feel like I was parenting him. If he felt that way, he’d always clam up on me, and the shit with his dad was so fucked that I didn’t want something to escalate and he not tell me about it at the least.

“Enough about me, though. Looks like you and Dylan have gotten real close again.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” I told Ryker seriously. Dylan had-… he had tried his damn best not to do too much in that parking lot but I was already in the fight of my fucking life after that kiss on the bleachers and knew there was no way in hell I wasn’t going to get all red in the face in this passenger seat. I couldn’t think about the way he pulled himself closer to me, whispering in my right ear with a voice that made my legs feel fully unstable.

I honestly hadn’t meant to rile him up with that comment about him tying me up, but the feeling of his large hand at my waist, holding me so goddamn firmly, had me seriously contemplating just telling Ryker we’d link up tomorrow…

But I couldn’t though.

Tomorrow was when I was going over to Dylan’s, and I wasn’t rescheduling that shit for the life of me.

“You damn near fell to your knees when he bent down to whisper something in your ear-”

“Shut the fuck up, Ryker,” I pressed him.

“I thought you said you were keeping things at just friends,” he countered, turning to me again.

“We are,” I replied shortly. Dylan and I hadn’t talked about anyone else knowing… so Ryker, he couldn’t- he… he couldn’t know about us. Not now, even though I got a sense that Dylan wanted him to know just how unavailable I really was.

Hell, I thought he was going to kiss me in that parking lot, and a massive part of me wanted him to, but I knew he wouldn’t. We hadn’t talked about it yet.

“Bullshit,” Ryker said, glancing over at me from the driver’s seat. “You’re getting red in the face right now just by this conversation.”

I wanted to tell him that it was none of his fucking business, but I just let out a sigh, took a hit from the cigarette, and blew the smoke out the open passenger side window. At this point, I’d let Ryker believe whatever the hell he wanted to, but I surely wasn’t admitting shit to him.

Ryker and I spent about an hour at the park just smoking and chatting. I made sure to keep the conversation more on trying to lightly convince him to at least get his GED, which didn’t really get anywhere, but I decided I’d try to circle back around on this with him again later. Honestly by the time he was ready to drive me home, I didn’t really have a whole lot of motivation to keep at this conversation, and I still had homework to get to.

I wanted to make sure Dylan and I were ready to turn in our science project on Monday, and even though we had tomorrow to finish it up, I liked being overly prepared for the both of us. I liked seeing that look in his eyes when he noticed I had taken the reins and did a little more than what was expected of me.

Above all else, he and I were taking gold. That wasn’t an option, it was a fact, and I was going to make sure of it.

My parents weren’t home when I got back, but my mum texted me saying they’d be home for supper, so I just took that time to hunker down on the Chem work in my room and try to sober up some. I didn’t get too high since I knew I still had to function, but after my mum and I resolved our shit in the kitchen a few weeks ago, I had promised myself I wouldn’t let her see me blazed like that ever again.

She expected better, and she deserved better.

What did come as a surprise once I started working, was the wildly unexpected call that came through from Dylan. I already knew it was him because I had set a different ringtone for his number eons ago, not wanting to miss the call if he rang me, even though I knew he couldn’t right now since he was grounded…

Or at least that’s what I thought , I couldn’t help but think now as I scrambled further up my bed to sit up against my pillows and the wall behind it, took the deepest of breathes to calm my nerves, then picked up a second or two later.

“Dylan,” I couldn’t help but smile when I answered. “Is this call safe?”

“Hi!” He replied quickly in that deep voice of his, making my smile grow. Shit, just hearing him again had me acting like a damn school girl, twirling a finger through one of my tight curls and shit.

God, I was a fucking mess with him.

I had only seen him mere hours ago, and I was already missing him.

“Yes, totally safe. I have formally been released from these bound shackles.”

“Early parole?” I chuckled, shifting down a little further on this bed now to try and get more comfortable, praying that would fix this bundle of nerves I felt. His voice alone created a tight knot in my stomach, one that made me feel all the things at once. It was both intense and all too fucking sexy at the same time.

I wanted him here with me now, yet I knew not to press it, especially if he just got ungrounded. But the things I would do just to get to be with him in this bed again was starting to make every part of me heat up at the simple thought of it, thinking of that Saturday morning and everything we did. The slight buzz from my high wasn’t helping anything either, just made his deep voice sound even more unreal.

Dylan chuckled himself, forcing me to take another deep breath slightly away from the phone.

My god he was so perfect I honestly could’ve passed away at this point. It felt like forever since it had been just us two talking, and now that we weren’t around a bunch of students where I had to watch every little thing I said or did when I was with him, I finally got to enjoy this.

“W-What ya do to get an early release?” I couldn’t help but ask as I tried to distract myself from just how much I was loving this.

“ Miss you ,“ Dylan replied lowly, shooting a missile straight through my damn heart in the process.

Keep calm, keep calm, keep calm, keep-

“Well, technically , I was being a jealous asshat and it was my dad’s most convenient way of calming me down. Bailing me out of the jail he put me in and letting me talk to you.”

My body was already in the fight of its life, but this conversation was about to set me back additional years. Dylan was just-… he didn’t understand just how badly I wanted every single goddamn part of him right now. Mind, body, soul- all the works.

“I-I’m… I’m sorry… about today,” I told him quietly. “I- I promise it won’t happen again- me overlapping plans like that-”

“ It’s fine, Isiah ,“ Dylan assured me quickly, and the way he said it made me shift a bit lower in my bed. “I should be the one apologizing for feeling some type of way. I… I trust you. I trust us , and this . What we have. I shouldn’t have gotten that jealous to begin with.”

Perhaps it was the weed talking here, but I found myself whispering quietly, “you can be jealous and trusting. That’s okay. Plus… I… I kinda liked it. The thought of you trusting me to do what I need to, but… still wanting me with only you.”

I heard Dylan take a deep inhale at those words, and I took a deep inhale of my own before adding this last part…

“It’s sweet… and it- it turns me on.”

And the low breath Dylan released made my toes curl slightly into the duvet below me, feeling more heat pooling as my cock grew harder and harder. It had been five whole days since Saturday when he and I were here alone, and though what happened Wednesday released some of the tension between us, my body was craving his touch like I was a goddamn addict.

I wanted him here desperately, because what I wanted to do now over this call just by hearing his voice wouldn’t be right unless he actually wanted to steer this conversation in that direction. I had wanted to touch myself since that very first “Hi” he had answered this call with.

Honestly, I had lost count how many times I had jerked off this week alone, but I knew I was setting national records.

“I… I-I promise you, that side of my friendship with Ryker- the benefits part- is over.” I promised Dylan, working to further reassure him. “I severed it almost immediately after you and I started talking again even if I didn’t know if you and I stood a chance, because I- he … he isn’t you… and it felt wrong to pursue someone I didn’t like in that way . I should’ve always kept things at just friends between him and I. You’re the only one I’ve ever felt that way about.”

Dylan took a sharper inhale now, his breaths getting a lot thicker as he released the most faintest groan, and I seriously couldn’t fucking help it anymore.

I moved my phone to my left side to hold with my left hand, while my right reached down to start palming my almost uncomfortably hard cock through my jeans. I did so as slow as humanly possible, trying not to make a sound over this call.

I should’ve admitted that to Dylan a lot sooner. A lot of people did things casually with others but there was only one person I only ever wanted to be my person. I should’ve never tried filling that void with Ryker when Dylan left for Ireland- using the with benefits part as just a distraction.

“I…” Dylan started, still releasing those heavier breaths that were making me shiver. “I’ve n-never wanting something so badly- to be… alone with someone like I do with you. No one I’ve ever wanted to… to touch . I’m like, I-I’m really sorry if I’m a bit too overbearing at times, I just really fucking like you-”

“You wanting me like that makes my whole body fucking strain itself with need,” I whispered without thinking as I started undoing the button of my jeans before sliding down the zipper. Just the simple thought of how Dylan was with me was unlike any fucking fantasy I had conjured or ever could.

It was all I had ever fucking wanted.

For him to want me. Even a fraction of how much I wanted him would’ve been fine.

But not even in my wildest dreams could I have imagined this side of him, and it drove me absolutely insane. Absolutely fucking feral .

“ Sh-Shit, Isiah ,“ Dylan whispered out in more of a raspier deep tone, and my mind traveled back to every single moment he and I had shared since he got back, forcing from my lips the most faintest moan as I slid my fingers past the waistband of my briefs towards my now throbbing, leaking cock. “W-What are-… what are you doing right now?” He then asked, and in a tone that made my heartbeat lose herself completely.

God, how the fuck did I even answer that?

“Lying down,” I replied after a slight pause. “I-In… in bed.”

When Dylan released a quiet yet deep moan, my hand started stroking my length immediately, forcing a quiet yet tight groan from my own lips. I just didn’t understand how someone could sound so unbelievably sweet yet so fucking hot.

“I-Is your door closed?” He asked with a more strained voice, forcing more leaking precum from my tip and all over my hands as I let out another moan which I tried desperately to muffle.

“Y-Yes,” that whole fucking word was just a heavy moan in itself as his clear deep breaths drove me severely off the deep end.

“And where… where is that right hand of yours now? “ He asked me in an even rougher tone, which made my knees bend, pushing my upper body back into my pillows as my breaths simply became moans at this point. My dick was begging for more of this.

It felt like it had been ages since we could be this intimate again, and while just being around him at school was perfect, getting to speak with him in class like we always did, in our own world, this part- the intimate moments, were kept at bay because of where we were. Who we were around. I couldn’t even hold his hand like I wanted to because we couldn’t discuss us.

I planned on fixing that in person with him tomorrow. Figuring out what we wanted because not touching him at all in the way I wanted to while in public was killing me.

It was so fucking difficult to answer him, though. To admit that I- that I was… but the next few worlds Dylan said sent my back arching off my damn bed instantly.

“ Tell me, Isiah .“ He whispered huskily through this line, sending more shivers through me. And I immediately complied.

“Down my… my jeans. S-Stroking me,” I uttered in a voice I couldn’t even recognize anymore.

The grittiest groan Dylan released through this phone damn near made me cum so badly, I had to slow my strokes down because of it.

“ Good ,“ he whispered, and I had to grit my teeth to keep this intensity at bay, almost pulling my hand away entirely because this intense feeling was utterly insane . This quick build up was so embarrassingly fast, I couldn’t even comprehend how Dylan could get me here already with just his words.

His voice …

…The sinful fucking sounds he was making and jagged breaths he was taking.

“What’s… on your mind right now? “ He asked me, yet the tone was both a tease and just downright fucking sexy, sending my heart into clear orbit.

“ Y-You ,“ I replied, not even processing my own words anymore before I said them. It was like Dylan had worked some sorcery or something into that voice.

“W-What exactly? “ he more or less demanded, and now I didn’t even know what to do to slow this down. Even if I stopped these slow strokes in their entirety, Dylan could make me cum just by this alone. This phone call alone.

“You… when y-you were here with me. In-… in my bed.” My voice was a choppy complete mess at this point.

“D-Did you like that?” He asked. “The way I… kissed you… the way I-I touched you?… the way you came undone below me? “

“D-Dylan, p-please, you’re- you’re going to- to make me-” I tried to let out, my hand now moving of its own accord as my strokes picked up the pace a bit. I was chasing for that release- begging for it, but more than anything, I genuinely didn’t want him to stop this. I didn’t want to cum too soon.

“ A

Answer me , Isiah. Tell me what you liked.“ Dylan fucking sent my heart spiraling by how fucking rough his voice was. I could hear his soft grunts, letting me know exactly where his left hand was, and the thought of him lying in bed jerking himself off to me. My answers . I was getting way too close. That familiar heat was intensifying.

“Y-You- your- t-those soft-… f-f- fuck-… Those soft fucking lips-” my body was starting to tremble now. “How you- y-you kissed- s-shit- D-Dylan, p-please

• I-I’m-“

Dylan’s breathing was hard now, his deep moans and grunts sounding utterly fucking unreal . His next words were what fucking did it, though. “N-Now… imagine them- … imagine my soft lips around your perfect fucking cock .”

“Sh-Sh-Shit-t! Sh-Shi

D-Dyl -“ I stammered aimlessly, practically crying out as my cum shot out from my tip, releasing that heavily pooled heat and lathering thick streaks of it all over my briefs and stomach, coating the black shirt I was wearing in some of it.

This had been by far the largest load I had ever orgasmed with while simply jerking off, and my breathing fell right off the deep end along with my heartbeat while a series of noises I couldn’t even describe stumbled past my lips.

My body was shaking from the pure intensity of this, my back arching off the bed again as I heard Dylan’s gritty moans and intense grunts get faster and faster. “T-That’s it, Isiah- right- ffuckk

• j-just like-“ and the sound he made that cut off his words made my softening dick start to harden again immediately .

He sounded-

I couldn’t even fucking describe it.

I had never in my life heard something as absolutely downright sexy as this- those insane grunts, with him allowing himself to be louder now that we weren’t in a damn janitors closet. And I couldn’t stop myself from reaching for my slick cock again, starting to stroke it once more from the deep sounds alone.

“K-Keep- sh

shit! Keep… keep going,“ Dylan insisted through his climax, making me almost whimper at how fucking phenomenal he sounded. “T-Tell me more. What- what else did you like?”

I was still trying to catch my breath, but I didn’t keep him waiting long before I said, “y-y-your large hand on- on my-” I released a ragged moan as my feverish body grew even fucking hotter by the sounds Dylan was making. “On m-my thigh- h-how you- Jesus ffffucking Chris t- pressed your… your dick against mine-” instantaneous pleasure coursed through every part of me at this point, and it was utterly fucking embarrassing how close I was getting again by all this.

How close he had made me yet again .

“ M

More ,“ Dylan practically demanded in that deep voice, which followed a succession of gritty moans. “ What else, Isiah? “

And I was fully unraveling at this point.

“Y-Your large hand slip- f-f-fuck- fuck

oh my god -“ my legs were trembling, thrashing sporadically about as I accidentally kicked my school work of the edge of my bed. “S-Slipping p-past my- my waistband-… w-wrapping around my- my- sh-shit! “

I couldn’t even finish that sentence. Or any more after, for that matter, my eyes were shut tight as I began ruthlessly pumping my cock. All I could get out were sinful, downright deplorable moans, feeling that tight, hot pleasure threatening to release itself.

“I-I’m going to learn everything-” Dylan broke his own sentence with a few deep, rigid, raspy moans before he continued. “Everything about you, Isiah, everything you like t-that-… that makes you come undone like that -” and as I heard the most intense orgasm cut through that handsome man not even a second later, I fell apart completely.

At those words . Those sounds .

The realization that this was a goddamn learning session for him right now sent my heart to the fucking moon as the most consuming orgasm cut through my own body. My thick cum had coated fucking everything, my hand, my briefs, my shirt. I came while listening to the sounds of him, my whole body trembling yet my hand not letting up until I got every last drop out.

My mind replayed his words over and over and fucking over again as I rode out this pleasure, unsure of how anyone could make me feel like… this . This fucking good.

It took a good minute for either of us to catch our breaths- to say another goddamn word that made sense besides jumbled curse words, and if I hadn’t just cum twice in a row, the simple thought of those words would’ve made me hard as steel all over again. Right now, though, I had drained it all.

Once we did finally catch our breaths, listening to each others slow, Dylan breathed out, “d-did you… did you like that?”

And I swear I felt my heart tighten itself. Dylan didn’t understand just how much I liked him. Just how much I fucking loved that.

“I’ve never- I-I’ve never came so hard by jerking myself off,” I whispered quietly in a broken voice to him, completely shattered and spent by just how hard I came.

My body felt like it had electricity serging through it still, I didn’t even know how to explain it.

“That… th-that makes me happy,” Dylan whispered quietly to me in a voice that was as shot as my own. “That we have… that it’s… it’s another first for us to have. Like- like together.”

And I swear, the fucking smile that spread across my face was absolutely massive . How the complete fuck could someone go from being so dominant to being so sweet in a matter of moments. That shit made my pounding heart stir as I tried to sit up a bit more in bed, forced to wipe my soaked hand on my duvet in the process.

Everything was going to have to be washed anyways. I had made a complete mess.

“Yeah,” I then whispered to Dylan, practically hearing my own smile through my words. “What happened Wednesday… in the janitors closet… I had- well, I had never… came like that from giving head without touching myself before. That’s-… that’s another first for me… us .”

I wanted that simple, but completely embarrassing admission to be more reassurance for Dylan. I wanted him to really understand that there was no one else like him. No one else I ever wanted like this.

I knew he was a bit insecure about his lack of experience, I could hear it in his voice- the slight worry whenever he asked if I liked something, and I wanted to try to make him understand how every single thing we did together felt like a first for me because it was him .

“R-Really?” He asked me, making this massive smile of mine impossibly grow. “What, um… what… what else?”

I couldn’t help but release a light chuckle. I found all this to be so embarrassing to admit, but I could tell it was making him happier and happier to hear.

“I, uh… I’ve never been into the dominant stuff before… but when you- you held my hands over my head, it, um… it sent shivers through my whole body. Me liking it… liking that side of you- the way it turned me on- that’s also a first between us.” This one was hard to admit because it brought on too many visuals from that memory and I swear my dick was over me at this point.

I knew it hated to see my hand coming after the last five days.

Dylan breathed the deepest breath however, and I felt it twitch inside my pants, reacting to him immediately. “I… wasn’t too rough?” He asked me, and I almost shook my head no before I realized I was on the phone.

“No,” I told him. “You’ve never been rough. Firm is what I’d say that was. Rough implies it perhaps hurt but that didn’t at all.” And there were no more truer words. Dylan’s holds on me were firm . He was strong, but gentle at the same time, always checking in to make sure I was okay.

It was something I didn’t have with other partners in the past, and that was because no one else knew me like Dylan did. Through eight years of friendship, and yes I was counting the year apart because that was just a misunderstanding, Dylan was always the one to patch me up from a fall off my bike, or a fall out of a tree. Any time I was hurt, he was there.

He was the first person who always knew his way to the nearest medical kit, and above all else, he was so gentle . If he ever thought I wanted him to intentionally cause me any harm during intimate moments, the man would probably draft up a hundred page contract and have me read through it meticulously, mull over it for about a year, then try to talk me out of it when all was said and done.

He’d make sure it was fully something I wanted, and he’d probably start with something as ridiculous as tickling me with a feather, creating like a 100,000 item list of things to use/do, to create the largest range. He never wanted to push past any boundary of mine and I simply loved him more for it.

I still remembered how he was when I accidentally burned myself two weeks ago, and he blamed himself. That man wouldn’t dream of causing me any amount of pain.

“I liked that- what you did,” I assured him again. “So you can add that to the list of firsts for us. And while we’re at it, you’re the first person to grab my ass like that where I-… where I actually enjoyed it. Every bit of it . Add that shit on there as well.”

In this moment, I wished that Dylan was right in front of me to see his reaction, but I also knew that a phone call made it much easier to admit all this to him.

“Are- are there other firsts?” He asked, his deep voice much happier now. That almost made me laugh because I liked how my deep admissions were bringing him so much happiness.

And so I decided on just one more for the evening.

“If we… whenever we decide to get intimate- like in that way- all the way … you’ll be my first to ever like- well… like enter me, if- if you prefer it that way.”

And hopefully you’ll be my only… I couldn’t help but think to myself quietly.

••

34. The Morning After

Ugh would y’all hate me if I just hit post on this completely raw chapter? I swear I’ll edit soon, I’ve just been hit with the worst migraines of my life but I don’t wanna leave y’all hanging. So I’m sorry for any errors but enjoy! I’ll make rounds in a few hours, I left work early to sleep though so imma do that first

xoxo

Dylan

“Well aren’t you just all fucking smiles,” my dad noticed as I eventually joined him and Carson at the set table for dinner. There were two massive boxes of pizza’s in the middle of it, one was pepperoni and one was veggie lovers. The boxes weren’t even flipped over yet to reveal to me exactly what they were, but I knew the order already. It was the same order we’d been placing for a couple years now.

Pepperoni was for me, much to my fathers dismay, veggie was for my dad, and Carson honestly dipped into both, which thank god , otherwise my father would’ve pushed veggie lovers on fucking everyone.

I was confused by why we were at the table and not on the couch like we usually were whenever pizza was on the menu- a movie usually followed to add to the family time- until I glanced over and saw that dad had since used the coffee table in the living room as a temporary landing site for a whole shit ton of paperwork. It made me grimace, reminding myself that whatever hell I thought my school work was… nothing touched that man’s workload.

Especially when John was coming back to the city.

“I take it your conversation with Isiah went well then?” Carson asked, setting the almost filled to the brim wineglass down at my dad’s placemat, setting a beer down at his, and then setting a Palengrino down at my own.

I did my best to hide the heat rising to my face… because the conversation Isiah and I just had over the phone had me on cloud fucking nine right now. My body still felt like it was burning, first by… well… how that call had quickly fucking escalated. And second, by how… how many firsts he and I had actually had together.

I had gotten so in my head that Isiah must’ve done all this before- that maybe… maybe I wouldn’t really hold up to all the previous experience he had…

But the way he had reassured me over that call- revealed to me that we, like- that we were experiencing new firsts together overall…

That shit had my heart spiraling .

If we… whenever we decide to get intimate- like in that way- all the way… you’ll be my first to ever like- well… like enter me, if- if you prefer it that way…

Once he had said that, I swear to god I didn’t even know how the meaning of the word nonchalant anymore. And the way he said it just made me take a pause, cause if I voiced how I felt, I knew I wouldn’t say anything right. I didn’t really care who was the top or the bottom or any of that shit… but that- having that be both our firsts… it… it did something to me. It made me feel somehow less nervous about maybe being so awkward if or when we did kinda get there.

I heard my father clear his throat at my left, sitting at the end of the table while I sat across from Carson, and when I looked up from the empty plate, I was welcomed by both my dad and Carson looking over at me expectantly.

“Oh- yeah- right- yes-” I nodded as I finally remembered what the hell they asked me. “It was cool,” I nodded to my father as my eyes met his, before I realized Carson was the one who asked the damn question in the first place, and my gaze shifted to his green eyes before giving him a nod.

Jesus fucking Christ Dylan, pull yourself the fuck together …

“Cool,” Carson replied, before reaching over to flip the pizza boxes open. “John and Derek will be here on Monday and your dad and I were going to host dinner. Why don’t you ask Isiah tomorrow if he wants to come? I know how much you two like Derek and Herold-”

“Herold will not be joining,” my dad cut in, taking a sip from the massively poured glass of wine. I could already see the pure, visible irritation on his face.

“Come on, love, you know they’re all kinda a packaged deal these days.” Carson insisted.

“I don’t give a damn. I didn’t ask for a bundle nor did I agree to it so they can leave the cat at John’s.” My dad grumbled.

“Does John even have a place here anymore?” Carson questioned, “cause if he does… he really should just sell it.” There was logic to that statement, but I knew all too well how much Carson still didn’t care for how close my dad was with John.

My father sighed, fully depleted now. “Carson, John is married . Is that seriously not enough for you?”

“He sent you a new culinary kit last week,” Carson grumbled, setting a slice of pizza on my father’s plate first, then my plate, before trying to distract himself with his own slice of pepperoni.

“Yes because he somehow got his hands on some Itazaki knifes,” my father pleaded with reason, but Carson wasn’t budging with his jealousy.

And at this point, I was completely used to it. We went through this every few months before our year in Ireland. Carson’s distaste for how close my father was with John, their boss, might I add, would simply never die. He was taking this one to his grave.

“What else can I do to keep the peace between you and him?” My father asked as he took a sip from his wine.

“You know what I want,” Carson murmured more quietly.

“Besides that,” my father bit back quickly.

“Marty did a fine job helping the last few times,” Carson reminded my dad, but he just shot him the iciest glare. I decided right then and there that I didn’t want to know, and luckily, my dad was so fed up with Carson that he decided to change the topic as a whole.

“As you can see, kiddo,” my dad gestured over to the right of him, towards the overwhelmed coffee table, “Carson and I got a lot of shit to do tomorrow since it’s the last business day before John comes. Can I trust you and Isiah to make dinner again? We’ll be back around six or sev-”

“Yes!” I spoke all too fucking soon… and with way, way too fucking eagerness that I genuinely wanted to dropkick the shit out of myself.

The way both my father and Carson looked at me was all too damning.

“Help yourself to my wine again and we’ll all have something to do next week that’ll involve me printing your face on t-shirts with angel wings. Got it?” My dad was quick to bark at me, which I nodded to just as quickly. After being grounded for two weeks, I wouldn’t even look at him incorrectly. Next week was the start of October, and there was no way in hell that I could land myself grounded again because Molly would raise hell if I couldn’t make it to her Halloween party.

And I thought that was the only thing I had to remain ungrounded for… but I was sorely mistaken.

The final day of this school week started with me waking up at the asscrack of dawn. I hadn’t realized how nervous I was to see Isiah again, especially after our phone call Thursday evening, but I got up and almost immediately started scouring my closet for something nice to wear. Since I was driving Isiah back here, I wanted to wear something that would not only keep his eyes on me all day, but would be good to rock the rest of the day after school was all said and done.

I decided on a long-sleeve light blue shirt and some light khaki colored pants, along with a thicker black wool jacket my dad had gotten me in Ireland because the temperature in New York City was supposed to me high fifties and low forties today.

By the time I got everything on, said my final goodbyes to my Pops and Carson who had seemingly got up late themselves, I flew out the door to try and meet Isiah earlier than usual.

Admittedly, it had taken me way too long to get my shit together and decide on this outfit… but once I approached my locker, and subsequently the guy leaning against it, waiting patiently for me, there wasn’t a single regret in my mind. The way Isiah’s eyes quickly left his phone screen to find mine was one thing, but when those hazel-green eyes then raked meticulously over every single fucking detail of me, that shit made my heart accelerate immediately .

“Hi,” I smiled, my voice already an awkward fucking mess, but at this point I forced myself to continue. I knew that our conversation the night before was going to make this whole interaction rough, but honestly I was way too damn excited to be having him over today that I didn’t care.

“Hi,” he smiled quickly, answering me as he all but forced his gaze up towards mine again. I was taking liberties of my own to be honest, because Isiah was waring a button up burnt orange and blue flannel, paired with some blue faded jeans which matched the blue perfectly, and I was going absolutely feral over the entire look. He was holding his black leather jacket in his left arm, making me question just how fucking good it must’ve all looked together.

“I’m- shit , have you been waiting long?” I asked him, but he quickly shook his head no.

“Honestly I got up late as hell. Then I kinda-… well I took a minute figuring out what to wear…” he admitted honestly, which in turn made heat quickly rise to my cheeks.

We’d both spent time getting ready today.

My left hand raised itself to scratch the back of my neck nervously.“I may have… well, sorta like did the same.”

“You look so goddamn hot, it’s criminal,” Isiah mumbled, but once he caught on to what he had mumbled, I watched that perfect face of his get like eight thousand times redder. He didn’t take it back or correct himself though… which was probably my reason for momentarily losing all control when I pushed Isiah back against my locker before quickly bending down to close that distance between his lips and mine.

Isiah gasped against my lips as I was suddenly welcomed with the softness of his, but he didn’t push me away. Instead, I felt his hands grip the sleeves of my jacket hard as he pulled me closer, moaning into this kiss, and I had to literally force myself to pull away otherwise this hallway was about to see some serious action.

I couldn’t look at anything else but Isiah as he and I both caught our breath, neither of us seemingly expected how much further we wanted to take that scorching kiss.

“I- I’m- I’m sorry, I-” I started to fumble through my mess of words, but Isiah quickly shook his head no.

“If you didn’t do that, I probably would’ve daydreamed about it all fucking day,” he admitted to me, which definitely just took the air I regained in my lungs, right out again.

Shit.

Fuck .

I didn’t want to wait until the end of the school day. I wanted to touch him now . I wanted to feel him now .

“My left nipple is sensitive right now so I predict Zinfel’s about to lay a pop quiz on us this morning.” Isiah sighed, and I sighed right along with him. In all eight years of us being inseparable, Isiah’s left nipple had never failed us in the past. Of course today would come with its trials and tribulations, I couldn’t help but think. Because having a smooth sailing day before I finally got more alone time with my boyfriend was simply too much to fucking ask.

“Alright,” I sighed again as Isiah stepped aside to let me open my locker. “We’ve gotta nail this one cause you know how that man gets around quarters. October is next week too so I suspect he will show us zero mercy.”

“Yeah well luckily for us,” Isiah said with a smile, “we’re well accustomed to his bullshit. And I just so happen to be dating a guy who’s note taking skills rival that of Cornell.”

“Was Cornell an actual dude?” I asked, turning to Isiah again after placing my lunch in my locker.

“Yeah, full name: Ezra Cornell. Former senator.”

“How former we talking?” I asked him.

“1800’s,” Isiah replied.

“Jesus fuck ,” I muttered. “With that brain of yours, I need to start asking more important questions. Like the meaning of life.”

“Easy,” Isiah chuckled, watching me shut my locker. “The answer is 42.”

And fuck me , but that answer alone made me want to kiss this perfect boy silly.

He was just a constant reminder that no one knew me like he did.

No one ever could.

As soon as I spotted Molly running up the bleachers, I automatically groaned.

“ You’ve gotta be fucking kidding, “ I muttered, shifting my leg so my inner calf was pressed firmly against Isiah’s outter.

“ Be nice ,“ Isiah reminded me, taking a large bite from the salad I had prepped the night before with heart-shaped cucumbers.

“I’m finding it,” I muttered, making Isiah unexpectedly chuckle.

“Does it take y-”

“It does, it does.” I interrupted, sending this man into a fit of chuckles.

“I won’t stay long!” Was the first thing out of Molly’s mouth, probably sensing my annoyance. “I just wanna run something by you two!”

I swear I could feel my soul sigh. The only reason I was even allowing all this was because in t minus 3 hours, I was going to have Isiah to myself.

“What’s up, Molly?” Isiah asked in between bites. I wanted for nothing more than to push him back against the bleachers, but I held back. I showed some restraint.

“I think we should go camping!” Molly replied, successfully pulling both Isiah’s and my own attention away from our lunch to simply stare at her.

“No,” my boyfriend and I shook our heads at the exact same time.

“ Woah woah woah , let’s think about this-“

“I rather not,” I muttered, cutting Molly off. “Isiah has a phobia of basically anything at night-”

“-and Dylan has allergies. Terrible terrible allergies,” Isiah finished for me… which honestly made me wish Molly wasn’t here because the urges I was having were awfully unholy to say the least.

“Pppplease!!” Molly begged. “It could be like a cute couples thing for you two, and it’s not like actual camping- you know I wouldn’t be caught dead in a tent. We’re staying in a cabin.”

Isiah’s eyebrows furrowed, representing exactly how I felt. “So we’re… just going to a cabin?” He confirmed.

“Well I mean like some of it will be outdoors. Like in the day time,” Molly tried to explain, but that honestly just made us more confused.

“So like… hiking?” I offered, but Molly rolled her eyes.

“You two are no fun,” she grumbled more to herself.

“Dylan has a lot of allergies so I want to know exactly what we’ll be doing,” Isiah explain for me, making me blush instantly. And hard.

“So it’s a yes?” Molly asked excitedly.

“A maybe at best,” I answered her. “I just got ungrounded. I’m not looking to piss my dad off any time soon.

“But Dylannnnnnn,” Molly whined.

“I’m serious,” I told her, “you have no idea how hard it’s been not being able to chat with Isiah. I’m not doing anything to fuck that up for us again.” Isiah’s leg pushed back against mine, forcing my eyes to his again which was honestly probably a trap because gazing into his perfect irises made me want to act up in all the ways.

“Will you at least think about it?” Molly begged. The cabin is Helen’s, and she invited me over but I’m way too fucking nervous for it to be just us so she agreed to let you both come.“

Isiah’s gaze zipped immediately to Molly. “You have a crush… on… Helen?”

“Shhh!” Molly shushed Isiah like there was a crowd here listening in.

“Molly… Isiah and I can’t do anything around her. She’s like the biggest gossiper known to man.”

“I’ll… I’ll have her swear to secrecy!” Molly suggested, making both mine and Isiah’s eyes roll. “Okay okay okay, I will cop any expenses. All of them. Please please please just come!”

“What are the amenities looking like?” I asked her, which made Molly grin like a fool.

“There’s a hot tub,” she answered, and she me but my mind couldn’t wait to start brainstorming every single scenario with Isiah.

“Sold,” I replied quickly, glancing at Isiah again whose face went immediately crimson.

“H-How many… how many rooms?” He asked Molly.

“Three. And because you both support me and what can advance the plot, you both will take the two rooms… but obviously I don’t care who sleeps whe-”

“Sold,” Isiah nodded, turning to me again. “But if Dylan isn’t feeling well, we get to leave whenever he wants to.”

“Sold!” Molly replied, grinning widely.

••

35. Dinner First… Or…

Another raw chapter that I’ll double back on while I get Substack updated today because I had a whole wedding yesterday

xoxo

Isiah

I’ve never considered myself to be a crash out type of person… but this was definitely going to be my absolute breaking point.

Trying to make it through the day without touching Dylan.

At this point, I was one more inconvenience away from just saying fuck it and kissing him- especially after the unexpected kiss he gave me this morning.

Unfortunately my left nipple came in with startling accuracy and we did have a test in Zinfel’s class, and luckily I actually did my homework yesterday because the way Dylan kept stealing glances at me had me in fucking shambles for every period I had after that.

Lunch wasn’t any better honestly because Dylan couldn’t keep his hands off me. I mean every chance he got, he took to touch my arm or my legs, to the point that my whole body ached for more than this. And when that final period ended, I waited for him at his locker before he straight up took my hand and led me straight out to his car, not caring who the hell watched.

“ Dylan ,“ I chuckled as he held the passenger door open for me. “We’re almost at yours. Your lack of restraint is for real showing.”

But he just dipped his head into the car and down to my ear before he whispered “ y-you’ve had a hard on all day. I can’t stop it even if I tried ,“ and that really didn’t fucking help a damn thing as I readjusted my jeans for the thousandth time today.

I wanted to ask him who’s fault exactly that was, but I bit my tongue, watching as he made sure I safely got in his SUV before walking around to the drivers side and hopping in himself.

I swear he looked too fucking good today , I couldn’t even control myself, nor the way my body reacted to him. Just those scorching looks alone made me almost crumble, and the way he whipped this car out of the parking lot let me know that whatever we were about to do when we got to his place was going to be downright sinful. Especially after how much time had passed since he last touched me.

Those looks alone had me preparing myself to try and hold out because up until this point, Dylan was all that was on my mind. He had made me cum so much the night before that I didn’t even know how the hell I was going to get anything done around him again.

He also made sure that drive to his was the shortest thing to ever fucking exist, with me trying to keep our chat G rated even though he was quite literally undressing me with his eyes, giving me side glances whenever he could.

I had thought my body had been pretty clear that he affected it to no end, but maybe not clear enough. I didn’t even think I could be this hard for this long.

“Should we stop through and say hi to Danise?” I asked him, trying to buy myself any amount of time before Dylan had his way with me, and he nodded quickly. I just needed a little bit of time to try and cool my body down- slow down my heartrate if possible. His voice alone had the ability to make me cum, but that matched with those light eyes was utter overkill at this point.

And he looked so fucking good today…

Dylan ended up still parking underground but we made our way up to the lobby instead of the penthouse floor. Once Danise spotted us from the hall to the elevators, I watched the largest smile grace her lips.

It had been a while since she saw me, so I was a bit nervous what she’d think of this new look, but Danise didn’t seem fazed in the slightest. Instead she welcomed me with literal open arms, pulling me into a largest hug.

“God, it’s so good to see you!” She gushed, tucking her hair behind her ears before gesturing to a freshly baked plate of cookies. “And Dylan… I completely understand your infatuation. Respectively.”

That made Dylan chuckle nervously, but his eyes darkened as they looked over at me.

Molly honestly might’ve been onto something when she said Dylan and I were so painfully obvious around each other. His gaze was locked in on mine, forcing my heart to beat all the harder, but I tried to focus on Danise.

“I missed you too, Dani,” I smiled at the older woman, before following Dylan’s movements with picking up a snickerdoodle cookie. Danise made the best snickerdoodles hands down. Just the best.

“Don’t be a stranger again. And that’s an order.” She told me serriously, which made me smile through bites of the soft, warm cookie.

“Yes, ma’am.” I nodded to her, but Danise immediately frowned.

“And don’t you dare call me ma’am ever again. I swear, between you and Dylan, you treat me like I was alive to see the dinosaurs go extinct.”

That honestly got a good chuckle out of me and Dylan, because up until like 3 or 4 years ago, we were for sure calling this woman old. We only stopped because she threatened to revoke the snickerdoodles, and that was enough of a threat to change our ways.

“Yes, our young, gorgeous friend,” I answered instead, which made her smile again.

“Don working late, kiddo?” She asked, turning her attention back to Dylan who nodded.

“Isiah and I are on dinner duty. We’ll come bring down a plate for you once we’re done.“Dylan offered, which made Danise’s comforting smile only grow.

“You know I’d never turn down both your cooking. What’s on the menu tonight?”

“I was thinking we try and recreate some of the great Antoine’s cooking. It won’t be as good as his, but my dad and Carson are pretty stressed about John coming to town so I think they’ll appreciate the effort. It would be nice to sort of remind them of their wedding ya know? Since La Belle catered it… but if it all goes to shit, we’ll just order chinese. I’ll make sure to get you your Kung Pao chicken if we do, with white rice on the side.”

Danise nodded to Dylan. “And don’t forget to make it-”

“Extra spicy,” I finished for her. “You know we’d never forget that.”

Danise laughed lightly to the both of us. “And make sure to-”

“-Tell them to add the red peppers. It’s insulting you thought a year of not seeing us could ever make us forget. I still remember the fiasco of February 17th, 2028. We’ll send the whole meal back if they fuck it up.” Dylan added, and the smile Danise’s stretched to made me feel all warm inside. Her next words that followed just added to that feeling.

“I am so happy my favourite boys are back together again. You two should hurry up and go, you probably only have about three good hours before your father gets back, Dylan. Go make the most of the alone time, got it?”

“Aye aye, captain,” I nodded, placing the cooking in my mouth so I could salute the woman.

Then Dylan added, “trust me… we plan on it.” And that warm feeling inside turned scorching hot. Yeah, Dylan was absolutely plotting in that perfect mind of his.

“A-And thank you for the cookies. As always.” I added myself, but Dylan was already reaching down for my hand to drag me towards the elevators, so I quickly shoved the rest of the cookie in my mouth. Dylan had long since practically inhaled his during this short but warming conversation. I knew how well Danise got along with my mum, so I made a mental note to have her pick me up one of these days so she could say hi. I honestly hated that the year I was apart from Dylan had kept her away from this place.

Don and Carson had made it very clear that this home was every bit as hers as it was theirs and Dylan’s, but once Dylan had left for Ireland, my mum didn’t have an excuse to catch up with this charming woman.

“Keep calling me young and I’ll keep feeding them to you fiends. Next time I’ll bake them in the kitchen down here- I know you boys like when the scent fills the lobby. And I like seeing you both more. Especially together”

“You’re the best!” Dylan called back to her, already dragging me towards elevator two with this cookie wedged into my mouth. I did my best to chew as we entered, and Dylan used his access fob to unlock the penthouse floor.

This handsome guy didn’t even wait for me to finish chewing before he bent down and brought his lips to mine, pushing me against the wall of the elevator cart adjacent to the door, but as soonas his lips found mine, I gave him a gentle nudge back.

“Y-You have to- to promise that we’ll at least start on dinner, and do some work first before I am to be accosted,” I urged him. Early parole didn’t mean his dad was above grounding him again, and I really wanted his input on the extra work I put into our project. Nothing made it to the final draft unless Dylan and I both approved of our work.

“I-I can’t promise anything, he murmured quietly as those light eyes found mine, him only putting a few inches of distance between us.

“D-Dylan, I murmured softly in return, “you can’t get yourself grounded again. N-Not only will I not get to talk to you-” shit, his lips were so fucking soft, I was already forgetting what this scolding was about. “-But Molly will murder us, perform sacrificial rituals to resurrect us, just to murder us again.”

“I know I know I know,” he grumbled irritably, but his hands hadn’t left my waist yet until I gave him a look that made him sigh. I hadn’t taken anything raunch off the table, I just made sure that he knew we couldn’t fuck around until we actually did some work.

That, and I had no freaking clue that Dylan had been learning Antoine’s recipes. I was genuinely excited to cook with him, and I was always excited to, but when we cooked together last, I was a whole drunken ball of nerves. Now we were dating, and I didn’t have to hide how good doing things with him made me feel.

I just knew that if he touched me like this again, I was folding. I couldn’t deny how good his touches and kisses were… and, well, the stuff that came after was. His deep voice was already enough of a fighting, uphill battle to overcome after that phone call we had last night.

Plus, Don had freed Dylan of those shakles to talk to me of all people. I had zero fucking plans to ruin this shit for me. School was rough trying to navigate when Dylan was getting more bold, and we couldn’t exactly ditch class or anything like that.

Our classes were actually starting to get harder.

“Speaking of John coming back to town… my dad gave me the okay to invite you over for dinner on Monday. Derek and Herold will be there as well, which my father is going to be irritated to no end about, but they really are all a packaged deal. I can see John pushing for it.” Dylan was talking, but his large hands were still at the sides of my waist, holding me firmly in place against this wall for this conversation and subsequently sending my heartbeat right off the deep end.

“Y-Yeah,” I nodded to Dylan. My mum was honestly just so happy that he and I were finally talking again, that she would probably lose her shit when she found out John and Derek would be back in town. And since I had returned to a perfect attendance record and started taking all my classes seriously again thanks to Dylan, she was much preferring me hanging out with him than Ryker. Dylan’s hands tightened some on my waist, forcing a slight moan from me which made that perfect face of his look at me like I was a goddamn edible arrangement.

Keep him ungrounded, keep him ungrounded, keep him ungrounded.

That was all I could chant in my head while his intense eyes bore into mine.

Luckily this elevator reached the penthouse floor in no time, and his hand left my waist to slip his left into my right, guiding me out just like he did when we made it inside. I got a good wiff of his cologne as we basically all but ran to his front door, fucking mesmerized by his scent like I always was. All it did was just make me weaker. His touch made me act like a goddamn mess, and his soft kisses pretty much put me out of commission for the indefinite future.

I questioned whether it would always be like this- me completely weak to every advance of his- but I knew the answer already.

I was so utterly in love with everything about him, that there was no saving me when he focused that demanding attention of his on me.

Dylan got that door open quickly. I mean like lightning fast, leading me through it before he and I dropped our backpacks near the door, and he got it closed behind me. I could already see him turning to me, but I let go of his hand and placed it up in the air, stopping him. “Dinner prep, school project, then everything else,” I had to insist. That look in his eyes was far too fucking alluring to mean he meant to do anything but drag me to his room.

“B-But Isiah,” he whined quietly, forcing me to shake my head again.

“I-If… If you t-touch me… I’m fucked . Let’s at least try to do something before we… we…” my words trailed off completely as I watched Dylan’s tongue slip past his lips to moisten them.

Why did he have to be so fucking perfect? I feel like I had grounds for a class action lawsuit right now as those daring eyes of his held my gaze fully, but he did finally back away, raising his hands up in defeat.

“Alright, alright, alright. Work or dinner first?” He asked, which made me smile lightly.

“Cooking first. We should probably give ourselves enough time to screw up then order dinner if we have to.” I then insisted lightly, which Dylan nodded at, turning to lead me straight to the kitchen. “I had no clue you were practicing some of Antoine’s recipes.”

“Oh yeah,” Dylan nodded, heading towards the sink before he ran the water for me to wash my hands first. “I wanted it to be a surprise for my dad at some point… but I work best with you at my side, If I have any chance of nailing this… it’s with you.”

Jesus fucking fuck.

If he kept talking like this, I was going to be a lost cause soon. I wanted to uphold my word at first… but now I just wanted him to touch me. I wanted him to look at me again the way he had been all day.

All I could do was watch instead as he pulled out some seemingly recipe cards from the first drawer near the sink, turning to place them on the kitchen island while I quickly dried my hands on some paper towels and joined him.

“Antoine was kind enough to send these over when I asked. I swear he had fallen in love with my father over the years, genuinely making time for my dad and Carson whenever he could. When I showed interest in trying out some of his recipes, he passed them over no questions asked. “I thought we might try making his Gratin Dauphinois since my dad loved it so much at his wedding, and some of his French Onion Soup.”

“That sounds fucking incredible ,” I replied as I watched him shuffle through the recipe cards for the right recipes.

“I’m glad you think so,” Dylan smiled, turning to me to give me a perfect fucking view of that smile. “And because my dad’s love for vegetables are borderline abuse at this point, I will toss together a Salade Nicoise to appease his troubled thinking.” That earned this beautiful man a genuine chuckle. “Plus I know you’ve been cutting back on carbs.” he then added.

I swear the look I gave him wasn’t intentional, but the look he gave me had me looking back down at the card immediately, my face getting far to fucking heated. “W-With the way you’ve been… f-feeding me lately at lunch, y-you’re making it awfully difficult.”

“Forgive me, my precious, but I like watching you eat my cooking- I-I like watching how happy it makes you,” Dylan replied more quietly, and my heart just gave up on any natural beats at that point. I knew my face was getting beet red, and I had no way of trying to stop it. Naturally, Dylan’s gaze on me beside him just intensified, making this all even harder to withstand.

At least he wasn’t touching me, I couldn’t help but think. That was the only reason I was remaining as calm as I possibly could be. If he so much as breathed on me incorrectly, we were saying fuck it and ordering Chinese. I couldn’t withstand much of this any longer.

We started by getting the potatoes ready, Dylan putting me on peeling duty for the Gratin Dauphinois while he looked over the recipes beside me, analyzing them meticulously. He was seriously giving this his all, and it made me do the same. It was how we always worked together- with Dylan simply giving me the momentum to prove to both myself and others that I had this perfection in me. And I don’t think there were many words to describe just how he challenged me. Never expecting perfection but believing I had that in me.

I had never met anyone who just wanted the best for me. Who encouraged me to try my hardest every damn time because he knew my capabilities so well.

I tried my best to peel these potatoes the way he showed me last… but this man couldn’t fucking resist showing me once again once I felt his presence behind me, his long arms wrapping around my upper build.

And this was when things really took one hell of a turn, feeding into the unreal desire I had for him to simply touch me again.

I had held out up until this point. Until I felt his hands glide down my long sleeved of this flannel, reaching for the potato I was holding and the peeler as he pressed his body flush against my back, and gave me on very real fucking reminder just how turned on he was. I hadn’t… I hadn’t suspected him to be so fucking hard, but as he pressed it against me, I felt my control slipping through my fingers.

“W-What did I say about you tucking your fingers in?” he asked near my right ear, sending the most sudden, spine tingling shudder through me that almost made me drop this fucking potato if he hadn’t reached for it himself. Fuck- fucking fuck his scent was- f-fuck-

“P-P-Please- D-Dylan-” I more or less whimpered, unable to push him away now as his right hand wrapped around mine, tweaking my peeling technique some as he used that hand to navigate the potato in his left hand. Feeling his firm body against mine was sending me over the fucking edge. His deep voice at my ear made my whole body ache for fucking more.

“ Like this, Isiah .“ Dylan whispered closer, his lips brushing against my ear and forcing another deep fucking shiver though me as my gaze tried to focus on this damn job, but it was no use. Feeling his large hand- watching it gently hold mine as we peeled this potato- I knew I was a fucking goner as soon as his soft skin touched mine.

At this point, we could just order Chinese. I didn’t fucking care anymore. And when his lips started to kiss that spot, the one behind my ear, I just fully unraveled. “D-D-Dylan,” I whimpered again, unable to stop any of this, feeling his kisses get a bit harder as he pressed those soft lips against me, before he unexpectedly started to pull in the skin gently with his teeth.

I dropped the peeler immediately at that feeling, a moan slipping from my lips before I could stop it, encouraging more of these harder kisses.

“D-Dyl-” my voice got choked up, unable to stop these moans. I couldn’t stop- I clearly didn’t want him to as I tilted my head further to my side, and Dylan set down the potato we were peeling. He had started to moan lightly near my ear, driving my heart rate up the fucking walls as I tried to hold what I was feeling.

I can bring us back on track, I further lied to myself. Once Dylan’s hand slowly left mine to drop lower, past my naval to the clearest bulge in my pants, I just let that false thought go while my moans got louder. More uncontrolled.

“D-Dyl- sh-shit- shit

• Dylan- f-f-fuckkk- fucking fucking fuckk -“ my choppy voice was what sealed the deal for us as his hand began to palm me through my jeans, feeling every single part of my arousal and bringing me startling close to the most sudden climax.

“D-Do you still want to- to do dinner fir-” he didn’t even finish his sentence before I shook my head no seriously, already drunk in this fucking intoxication. “W-W-Will you… will y-you let us go to my bedroom now?” He then murmured against the sensitivity of my skin near my ear, and the nod that I followed that up with was just the most accurate representation of my desperate hunger for him. For more of this. “I- I want to… try a few things.” He admitted.

And I had never wanted something so desperately a day before in my entire life…

But I just wasn’t expecting him to turn me around quickly, finding my lips with his in complete record timing, like he had mapped their exact location all along…

••

36. Careless Whisper

Alright y’all

You bullied me into dropping this one lol

Enjoy, lovelies!

And yes it’s unedited but you know the drill. I’ll double back around later

xoxo

Dylan

I knew I was being all too impatient…

Demanding even…

But Isiah- he… he looked way too fucking good for me to even consider not touching him as soon as we got home.

He was peeling the potatoes just fine as we both navigated the large kitchen together, but watching those hands of his, how meticulous and intentional the movements were, just made me want them on me instead. Far more.

As soon as I felt those first few shudders, further coaxing me to press myself even firmer against the back of Isiah, I knew it was a loss cause- me trying to keep myself together.

Honestly I was just fine with Chinese tonight, and those soft moans from him only further confirmed that all our alone time alone today was about to be spent in my bedroom, hands down…

But first, I couldn’t resist turning Isiah around quickly, bending down to capture those perfect, soft lips with mine. Fuck, he felt so fucking perfect- I couldn’t stop myself from touching him fucking everywhere . I had already felt him through his jeans, feeling that assurance that he was just as fucking turned on as I was, which only made me go from zero to a thousand when my hands traveled down the curve of his spine to his ass, gripping it firmly before unexpectedly lifting him up back onto the free space on this kitchen island.

Isiah broke this heated kiss to gasp at the unexpectedness of this sudden shift in positions, but I was already starting to fumble with the buttons of his flannel.

“D-D-Dyl-” he attempted to get out, but he was right at my level now, and my lips were back on his in an instant, feeding my intense craving of him and silencing that mouth of his.

God, there was no way someone could feel this fucking good. My lips moved against his with urgency, pushing the soft material of his button down further back, and I had to break the kiss this time to fully fucking admire the white, thickly strapped undershirt that revealed every freaking bit of his toned body. God fucking fuck , I was practically drooling, my breaths coming out sporadic as all hell as my heart pounded beneath my chest.

“Isiah,” I murmured as my hands moved from his shoulders down the front of him, taking my sweet fucking time as I did so. “Y-You- y-you’re so fucking- fuck…” I muttered, my eyes raking over every single part of him.

“D-Dylan, we- w-w-we should- ahh- ah sh-sh-shit- “ Isiah moaned as soon as my hands slipped under his white cotton undershirt to touch the bare skin of his completely toned stomach.

I knew I was starting to really lose it… but his skin, Jesus fuck , it was so goddamn soft I couldn’t stop myself. My larger hands reveled in this incredible feeling, unable to stop them from traveling even further up under the material, and the sounds- the goddamn moans that fell past Isiah’s lips as his breathing intensified, only made me even more weak to any amount of self control.

“Sh-shit- sh- w-wa- wait- D-Dyl-” Isiah stammered, trying to keep himself from laying back fully onto the kitchen island, but I was already thinking about whether I’d be tall enough if I got onto my knees right now, my hands gliding up his perfect build towards his nipples. As soon as I touched them, Isiah let out the tightest moan, falling further back onto his elbows at my unexpected movements- my unexpected touch.

I rolled the small nubs gently between my fingers, my eyes finally drifting upwards to meet his as I pressed my hard crotch against his, and the way Isiah was looking at me made this whole situation all the more fucked. There was no way I was stopping at this point.

It must’ve been the way I was looking at him now- the intensity in my eyes- that made Isiah sit up quickly with his trembling hands pushing back lightly on my chest. “W-W-Wait- w-wait wait wait-” Isiah mumbled, but I could see how much lower his eyelids were. I noticed how flushed his tan skin had gotten, and it took everything in me to slowly pull my hands out from under his shirt. “B-Bedroom, D-D-Dylan-” he choked out, insisting that we didn’t take this any further here.

Isiah always was the voice of reason… even if pushing him back onto this counter was all I wanted to do right now. I knew that we had a whole dinner planned but I couldn’t find a shred of a damn to give about all that as my hands moved back to his upper thighs, slipping under them to pick him up completely. I heard him let out another slight yelp, unable to not react to this sudden shift yet again, but I held him securely, making sure he was comfortable in my arms.

I then buried my head almost immediately into the crook of Isiah’s neck, absolutely fucking infatuated by how intoxicating his scent was, and feeling every single shudder his body released was driving me absolutely insane. Like words weren’t even suitable for how much I loved his reaction to me. Every fucking shiver honestly just further fueled my lack of control.

I kept telling myself to slow down… but every time I touched Isiah, that small voice in my head telling me to chill the fuck out, got smaller- minuscule even.

“D-Dyl- D-Dylan-” Isiah moaned, shifting his head into the crook of my own neck as I carried him into my bedroom, kicking the door both open then closed with my foot before bringing him straight to my mattress. Hell, it took me literal seconds to start stripping him, pulling off his flannel and undershirt before unbuttoning his jeans and zipping down his zipper. I genuinely could not get him undressed fast enough, and I’m sure Isiah felt my impatience when I promptly brought my lips down to his again.

The moan that slipped past his lips absolutely didn’t help a goddamn thing. I mean it was just gas to an open flame as my lips meshed with his, demanding more almost immediately.

“Sh-Sh-Shit-” Isiah mumbled against me, pulling me even closer to him, and I swear I was going to absolutely lose my mind. My hand was already pushing past the waist band of his jeans, slipping into his briefs to feel his already rock solid hard on. I could feel the nerves feeding off him, but I tried to reassure him with my touch. Honestly I was nervous as shit too, but I also knew what I wanted… and that was him. Only him.

“A-Are we okay?” I whispered against him, checking in. “A-Am I moving too fast?”

Isiah shook his head no immediately. And I thought that was all the go ahead I needed, but when I started to lower myself, my tongue dragging down his build, I felt Isiah quickly pull me upward.

“W-What’s wrong?” I whispered quietly to him. “D-Do you not… d-do you not like it like-”

“N-No, it’s not that,” he rushed out quickly, which honestly only further confused me a bit. “Fuck- shit- fuck , I’m sorry- I just- Jesus , I’m psyching myself out- like about like you not liking it- like I don’t know if you’ll like-be like into this, like-”

“ Isiah ,“ I murmured, drawing myself closer to him and bringing my lips towards his right ear. I then grabbed his right hand, placing it lower on my body towards a place that had been craving his touch all fucking day . And as soon as he felt me, I could visibly see the reassurance I was giving him. “I promise you that I want this. I want this so fucking badly, you have no idea .”

“B-But what if you… w-what if you like… d-don’t like… like like it?” Isiah questioned again, yet I simply shook my head no, nuzzling it into his neck now.

“ I like you ,“ I reminded him again as my lips placed gentle kisses onto his neck, “and watching you- like giving you pleasure, Isiah… I-I like that. I like seeing what my touch does to you.” I further confirmed. I didn’t like seeing him like this though- so unsure about what I might like. We had spent the last week wanting to have some alone time, and now that we could, I didn’t like how his nerves were eating away at him.

I wanted him to understand just how badly I wanted him. There wasn’t anything we could do together that would ruin that… that could change my mind, or deter me from just wanting him .

“Do you trust me?” I whispered quietly, placing more gentle kisses on his neck, and Isiah nodded quickly. “Then I want you to trust that I know what I want, Isiah. We’ve always communicated, besides this past year, regardless of whether we were friends or more… and that shouldn’t stop now. I know that this is… new for me… but we’re both experiencing a lot of new things together… right?”

Isiah nodded again against me. “I-I’m sorry, I-I’m just- I’m afraid of fucking this up for you- for us.”

I nodded into his neck. “And your emotions are alright. They’re valid. Just do what you always do- communicate them, and I’ll do what I can to reassure you… okay?”

Isiah nodded, his hands wrapping around me tighter. “I-I-I’m sorry,” he whispered quietly.

“D-Don’t apologize for being nervous,” I whispered in return. “It-… It lets me know where we’re at. I know I can be a bit… strong willed -”

“O-Oh is-” Isiah’s voice cut off as soon as my kisses got rougher, my lips sucking that skin in before my teeth pulled on it. “I-I-Is that how w-we’re describing that one track mind of yours?”

“Sh-Should I show you I can multitask?” I countered as my hand travelled down his body, forcing his back to arch off this bed as soon as it slipped past his briefs.

“Sh-Sh-Shit- shit D-Dylan, shit -” Isiah fumbled his words, causing my kisses to get even rougher. Goddamn, I fucking loved seeing him like this I swear to god.

“I… I want to taste more of you, Isiah,” I whispered carefully, feeling the deep shivers running through him. “But only… only if you want me to. It’s okay if right now isn’t the right time. I don’t mind waiting for anything with you.” My hand wrapped around his hard dick, stroking him faster, and the moans from Isiah only fueled me on.

“N-N-No I- I- I want y-you- f-fuck -” Isiah let out another gritty groan, sending heat straight to my groin. “I-I want it- th-this-”

My kisses just turned to full on hickeys at that point. This was all too addicting- he was too addicting. And I found myself slowly moving my kisses lower on his bare skin, unable to keep my fucking hands off him once I made it past his clavicle and finally got to his dark nipples. As soon as my lips touched them, Isiah became a withering mess.

“D-D-Dyla- f-f-fucking f-fuck -” he moaned, fully arching his back off this mattress. I could feel his heartbeat now- just how fucking hard it was beating, and that just turned me on even more. Knowing I made him feel just as intense as he made me feel was the most perfect fucking feeling.

My teeth gently grazed the taut nubs, and Isiah quickly brought his hands to my hair, slipping his fingers into my curls before gently pulling me back.

“D-Did you not like-”

“Y-Y-You’re going to m-make me c-cum,” Isiah stammered quickly, pulling a smile from me as I looked up at him.

“ I-I don’t remember saying you could ,“ I murmured in return, literally feeling Isiah’s heartbeat pick up by that sentence alone.

“Sh-Shit- shit Dylan, J-Jesus fuck -” Isiah muttered, and I watched as his eyes rolled back slightly. Being like this with him was indescribable. He was always a giver, but now I got to let him know just how appreciative I was.

“Let me get d-down there first,” I whispered to him quietly, dipping my head lower and feeling my lips brush over his left nipple again. The shudders Isiah’s body erupted into almost sent me to the good lord I swear to fucking god. It just made me all the more harder, but today was about him. I wanted to see him cum over and over again.

My lips slowly moved lower once I could feel him close to the edge, then laid hard kisses all over his upper chest, but Isiah was losing more and more control as I went, and what was even more unsuspecting was the way his body quickly spasmed as I stroked him faster. “D-D-D-Dyl- w-wai- w-wait-”

Not even a second later, I felt his warm cum coat my whole left hand, drenching both it and his briefs.

“Sh-Shit- I-I’m sorry-” Isiah’s whole body was a trembling fucking mess, and by god did I love it. Like I mean I fucking loved it.

“It’s okay,” I reassured him, murmuring quietly. “I’ll clean you up.”

And the way that made him shake even more, honestly sent me into overdrive.

Cool it, Dylan, I told myself. Cool it . We weren’t even there yet, and how Isiah was getting now was honestly so fucking hot I didn’t know how to slow myself. I moved lower, kissing his body fully on the way down as I continued to stroke his now slick and hardening dick. Isiah was shaking under me, but we for sure weren’t done yet. And as my hand released him, it was only to pull his briefs completely down, stripping them off him in record timing.

“D-D-Dylan,” Isiah stammered out, “y-y-you can- you c-can stop at any time- if y-you l-like- like don’t like it-”

“ Isiah ,“ I whispered up to him, “y-you have no idea how turned on this makes me.” And those were honest words, my dick was literally leaking right now just watching him like this. Seeing himself fully bare would honestly make any fucking person salivate. There were no words suitable enough to describe how seriously perfect he was.

Isiah just nodded, but that unsurety didn’t quite leave his eyes. I decided that perhaps I could maybe show him better than I could tell him, causing me to dip my head lower to his cock, immediately licking up the mess he created, and the way Isiah’s entire body jolted at that almost sent me right over the fucking edge.

His moans were so downright fucking sexy, I genuinely didn’t give a fuck about what he tasted like… but he tasted sweet. I actually genuinely liked it, and the way his body continued to jolt let me know that he must’ve liked this too.

Just as promised, I took my sweet time cleaning him up, licking up his cum. Isiah’s face quickly tightened, letting me know he was reaching his limit soon. I honestly had never sucked a dick before, but Isiah sucking me off was a stellar example, and if I was nothing else, I was a quick learner. What I didn’t expect, however, was for Isiah to quickly tug my head up by my hair, his hands shaking profusely.

“W-W-W-Wait- h-hold o-on- I-I’m a-about- I-I’m going to-”

“C-Cum, Isiah. It’s okay… you don’t have to hold back with me,” I told him seriously. “I-… I want you to.” And Isiah’s eyelids lowered expeditiously. I could visibly see the restraint on his face, but he allowed me to bring my lips back down to his cock again, his hands loosening their grip on my hair and allowing me to take control once more.

Instead of just sucking his dick however, I decided to explore a bit more, bringing my lips to and instead sucking hard on the soft skin around his cock. What I didn’t expect was the unexpected spasm, nor Isiah trying to push me back as hot cum soon shot from his wet tip, coating his whole stomach.

“Sh-Sh-Sh-Shit- shit I- I’m so sorry-”

“ Th-That was so fucking hot ,“ I mumbled quickly against his skin as my eyes finally met his. Then I shifted up slightly, slipping my tongue past my lips to lick the cum off his stomach, and Isiah let out a soft whimper as he watched intently. I was now convinced that this was by far the hottest thing I have ever fucking experienced. Genuinely . I had never seen Isiah like this, completely a mess like this… and I was fucking in love with it.

Isiah surprised me suddenly by pulling me up further by my hair, and I sure as shit didn’t expect him to fully flip us, his shaking body quickly straddling my own. “I-I-I w-want to- to m-make you feel good to-” he whispered out in a shaky tone, already undoing my own pants button before sliding the material clean off me, but once he straddled me again, reaching for my briefs… this position, it-… my hand reached for his thighs to stop him as I pulled him down harder onto me.

“H-Hold on,” I whispered to Isiah as I abruptly sat up. “I… I l-like this- I-I like you like this.”

Isiah instinctively wrapped his arms around my neck, but once I started to slowly rock my hips, pushing my leaking cock beneath my briefs up against his bare one, Isiah quickly buried his head into the side of my neck, making sounds that drove me absolutely mental.

“Y-You- y-you like this?” I asked in a voice so coarse that I didn’t even recognize it was mine anymore, and Isiah shivered, nodding his head quickly.

“I-I-I m-might- I-” he muttered against the skin of my neck, sending even more pleasure straight to my fucking groin as Isiah started to grind himself against me all on his own.

“Y-You can cum,” I whispered gently, but the feeling of his lips against my skin was bringing me closer and closer to my own fucking climax. Holding him like this… it just made me think of when he and I might like… like actually do it. Like, if this position was something he’d like… or at least maybe like to try. I thought of how he might feel… like with me inside him, and that heat building up was so goddamn quick that it was slightly startling.

“F-Fuck- Dy-Dylan-” Isiah’s voice was completely shot to hell, but the way his arms wrapped around me tighter as he ground himself against me was telling enough to know that he was close again. He wouldn’t last much longer.

God, how could anyone sound this fucking good? I wondered. How could anyone feel this good?

At this point, I had completely given up on dinner. Chinese was absolutely fine if it meant I got to at least hold him like this longer. I knew I’d cum soon, but that didn’t even matter at this point. My hands moved from Isiah’s soft but firm upper thighs, to his plump ass, not even caring about trying to be modest because this was the most intimate I had ever felt with anyone ever.

“I-Isiah?” I mumbled out, feeling his short breaths as I ground into him harder. “I-I’m about to cum- y-you’re going to make me cum-”

His breathing got even shorter after that as he started to lay mindless kisses on my neck. “M-M-Me t-too,” he stammered, his body just shaking in my arms. And I could literally feel it- his whole body tightening just before he reached his tipping point. The way he started shaking harder was honestly what sent me over the edge, but the sounds he made as he then came was just fucking outrageously sexy.

Feeling those moans muffled into my neck made me lift a hand from Isiah’s perfect ass to his hair, pulling his head back so I could fully hear him. See him. And the look on his face as his eyes opened to me, the way it tightened further as he let out soft whimpers… that shit made me cum so fucking hard, the intensity of it sent me into a fit of shivers as a massive load further drenched my briefs.

Just his perfect face alone was enough to do it for me.

God, he was so fucking beautiful.

“ Isiah ,“ I murmured to him in between the most intense breaths as sheer pleasure coursed through every single part of me.

It was his response however that took me completely by surprise.

“ I love you ,“ he muttered quietly as we both slowed the rocking of our hips.

But it was the look he gave me after that concerned me the most. Full on dread was the only way I could describe it, as clear panic overtook all his features.

“Sh-Shit- shit shit shit shit

• f-forget I- shit- shit . I-It’s too soon- shit -“

“ Isiah ,“ I whispered, ready to shut him the hell up with a rather unexpected but probably overdue confession of my own… yet I didn’t even manage to get that far because whatever moment we were clearly about to have, was quickly interrupted by the sound of the front door suddenly opening.

And the first thing out of both our mouths was a resounding “ shit! “

My dad and Carson were home. Early .

••

37. The Kids Are Gunna Be Alright

Alright, another unedited one but I couldn’t keep y’all hanging lol

Enjoy!

xoxo

Carson

As soon as my husband and I made it home… we knew something was up.

For starters, both these kids were hot messes right from the very beginning. Isiah was a nervous wreck, and Dylan was overcompensating. Hard . Don took one look at the two once they both tumbled out of Dylan’s room to greet us, and simply just sighed. Dylan was looking at him… he was looking at Dylan… then shifting his eyes to Isiah… who was staring back at both of us, flustered as all hell…

“Welcome home, Isiah,” Don still gave him a warm smile, but his eyes were darting between these two, with Isiah’s whole body flushed as all hell. “I gotta take a shower, so for the time being, this is your mess, Carson.” He mumbled quietly to me, dropping his work bag before fully abandoning this conversation as a whole. And I couldn’t even fight him on this one. We were only home early because one of us gave this day his all, and it sure as shit wasn’t me.

Don felt like we needed to spend more time with Isiah, especially after how we left things last time, and I agreed. Things were… developing between Isiah and Dylan… fucking clearly . I mean Dylan’s hair was a bloody wreck, alluding to whatever they were up to before stumbling out of Dylan’s room.

“Okay!” I took charge of this mess immediately. “How… how was school?” I then asked, watching as my beautiful husband ran his hand through both kids hair on his way out, successfully showing them both his love before quietly fleeing this situation.

“I-I-It was- it- it went okay,” Dylan stammered, and I could simply only sigh. My husband saw this wreck from a mile away and pressed the not today button so quickly, I was going to need to start getting creative.

“I see we… well, we started dinner?” I asked, glancing at the kitchen, and both these kid’s faces turned even brighter red. Jesus Christ .

“Y-Y-Yeah-” Dylan mumbled through. “I-I wanted to-to make some of Antoine’s dishes,” he tried to get out, and I felt my eyes soften greatly at that.

“ That man sent you his recipes? “ I questioned quietly, to which Dylan nodded.

“Yeah I requested them a while ago. I just haven’t been too sure of myself to make them, but with Isiah here-” as soon as this one nervous wreck of a man turned to the other, Isiah looked away far too quickly.

Jesus fuck , I couldn’t help think. Something was up. Like something besides the obvious sexual tension here. And somehow I now realized Don might’ve picked up on it. He was close with Isiah, but he knew my relationship with him was stronger. He was trusting me to handle whatever was going on between them, and I was determined to show him that I got it.

That was the thing about the man I married. He liked how consistent I was. Besides Brad, I genuinely believed I was the first person he ever trusted to take care of something. He may have called me an idiot most days, but like always, his actions contradicted his words.

“Alright kiddo,” I sighed yet again to Dylan, “continue in the kitchen while Isiah walks me through the bomb you’re most definitely not building. Your dad will be back out shortly to help you.” And both kids gave me a quick nod, with Dylan heading towards the kitchen while Isiah rushed towards the living room, opening up his backpack while I followed closely behind him.

“Hey man,” I whispered quietly to him, “what’s up? What’s wrong?” I could see his hands were clearly shaking like all hell as he struggled with the backpack zipper, and at this point I was just worried. I couldn’t read both their energy like Don could.

“ I fucked up ,“ he whispered ever so softly, which made me take a whole seat on the couch near him. These kids were nothing but heart attack inducing gremlins I swear to god.

“What… what do you mean by that?” I didn’t want my tone to come off defensive, but I also just spent the last year going through the worst depression of Dylan’s life. I was defensive of what happened to him now- of how Isiah had such an effect on him, even though I knew Isiah was just going through his own shit with how he also felt.

I swear, every day I was understanding more and more why Don never played about Dylan. While he might’ve expected perfection, he always gave it. He always made sure Dylan felt his love and care… and every day, I was getting it more and more. Having this son genuinely changed his life for the best, and he made sure Dylan knew that.

There were so many nights in Ireland when Don just questioned what the fuck he could do, and the only answer I could give him was to wait until we got back to the States as I held him in my arms, comforting him. That hopefully the two kids seeing each other in person might help whatever was going on.

“I… I like… I-I told him that I like… like love him.” He whispered to me, making me almost choke up a goddamn lung right after that shit. Dylan looked over at me from the kitchen with clear concern, but I just tried to wave it off, acting like Isiah didn’t just send a kamikaze straight through me with that sentence.

“I-Isiah,” I croaked out to him quietly, “y’all got something already going on, right?” I just had to make sure he didn’t launch this whole confession outta fucking nowhere, but I could already see the charged chemistry between them.

“Promise me you can keep a secret,” he pleaded.

“Don and I already know something happened,” I admitted to him, “today just fully confirmed it for us… you two are kinda a hot mess.”

“ Shit ,“ Isiah whispered, but I couldn’t help but chuckle softly. These two were so blatant with their attraction that it wasn’t even funny.

“What did… what did Dylan say?” I whispered to him softly.

“I… I don’t know… you both came home before then, but I just- I saw how taken aback he looked and I just- I-”

“ It’s alright, man, “ I assured him quickly, watching his breath pick up in real time by what I could only assume was straight fucking anxiety. Hell, I was feeling anxious myself, and very quickly realized why Don’s massively exhausted self needed a whole minute to himself. 

“I’m sorry, man,” Isiah whispered, sounding so fucking broken hearted, I didn’t even know what to do. I could see it all over his face plainly. He was hurting… badly .

“Don’t… don’t let it get to you. Don’t let it overrun your mind. You didn’t hear his response, Isiah-” I tried to say, but Isiah quickly shook his head no.

“ It’s too soon ,“ he whispered. “Like we’ve only been together for a few weeks, Carson, like that’s way too fucking soon-”

“I married Don in less than five months of being with him,” I reminded this kid, “and it was nothing but rolling the dice. The whole time. Genuinely, every day I was met with the fear that he might wake up one day and change his mind… but everyday, just hearing his gentle good morning to me is what he said he would do- reassure me that every day he chooses this. We face everything one day at a time, and I think looking at this from that perspective might help.”

Isiah’s features relaxed some at my words.

“I am happy that you got this off your chest. My guess is you guys aren’t taking this slow… like at all…”

“ T-Trust me, I’m trying ,“ Isiah muttered which made me chuckle yet again.

“Hey, you’re chatting with a whole lover boy here. Passion is part of the romance, and the more the timing is disjointed, the more unique the experiences are… but I’ve been your age before, I get it. Don might not get it but I do. I was a whole whore back in my day,” I admitted to him.

“ Please spare me the details ,“ Isiah rushed out quickly which just made me laugh harder.

I could see he was starting to set out pages of notes onto the table, but his actions slowed, looking back over at me.

“You’re not going to understand a damn thing of this, are you?” Isiah asked me seriously.

“I’m sure the hell not,” I answered, not missing a beat, which finally pulled an honest laugh from Isiah.

It was seriously a rare sound for this afternoon, considering how badly his nerves got to him the rest of today.

As soon as my husband joined us, I could see that he needed that time away. He looked a lot more calm, and I appreciated that he took the time when he did. That he trusted me to handle things.

“Okay, what are we working on?” He asked, showing up in the casual clothes he knew I fucking loved seeing him in. His suits were immaculate, but seeing him in comfy trousers and a sweater- scratch that, my comfy trousers and a sweater- that shit made me want to undress him swiftly. Eight years later and this man still made me lose all control like this. The fact that he just got hotter and hotter with each year had to be a criminal offense.

“Antoine’s recipes,” Dylan replied, which made Don’s eyebrows raise immediately.

“That man actually sent them over?” My handsome man asked in pure disbelief, to which his son nodded. “Then let’s get to it then, show me what you’re working on,” and the love in Don’s voice made me smile. He was proud of his son and taking that initiative. Meanwhile, I was on this couch searching for more brain cells to even try to comprehend what the actual fuck Isiah was explaining to me.

I mean at this point, I was just listening to listen. There was no way I was absorbing any of this, I was just making sure they weren’t building anything remotely like a bomb.

“I’ll call your mum tonight,” I told Isiah, “see about you coming over Monday for dinner.”

“I… I don’t know if that’s like… like a good idea.” Isiah mumbled.

“Isiah, you’ll get this sorted. You two will be fine,” I further assured him. And I meant it. I know the two were in a tricky spot, but I knew they’d get through it. If they could get through the last year, they could get through anything.

As Dylan and Don worked in unison to get the food cooked, before we know it, they were already plating it. The home was filled with familiar, delicious scents which just brought me back in time. I had missed this- Antoine’s recipes. It brought me straight back to my wedding, and I couldn’t help but walk into the kitchen, ruffling Dylan’s shaggy hair with my right hand before full on pulling Don into me by his waist to kiss him.

“This brings back memories,” I whispered against his lips which made Don smile into this kiss.

“ You bring back memories,“ he mumbled, forcing my hands to tighten on his waist. If he wasn’t careful, we could fuck around and find out just how many memories we were willing to bring back after he perfected a meal like this with Dylan…

But Don wiggled his way out of my hands, nudging me away. “ Go sit ,“ he insisted with deep blush creeping up on his cheeks. I could never grow tired of seeing him get like this. He’d always insist on fighting it, but his body could never lie. I insisted on the importance of keeping things kid friendly though. I knew that I was going to show him just how appreciative I was later on, so for now, I could exercise some patience.

I made my way to the dining table, and Isiah quickly joined me. It was clear that things were still… awkward between him and Dylan, and it was clearly visible by the next sentence Don said.

“After dinner, you should drive Isiah home,” Don told his son as he started setting plates down with him, but it was Isiah who spoke up quickly.

“N-No I-… I can get my mum to pick me-”

“ No ,“ Dylan said firmly, pulling the attention from both Don, myself, and Isiah. “I-I’ll drive you home.”

“I-It’s okay-”

“Isiah… I’m-… I’m driving you home,” Dylan confirmed, making Isiah just eventually nod in defeat. And that was how we left things at. While I wanted to interject and offer I take the poor kid home, I knew he and Dylan needed this time to sort this out on their own.

I had to admit though… shit was awkward as all hell after that.

“They’re definitely together,” Don sighed as he took a sip from his glass of wine. We were both currently standing in the kitchen after having one of the best meals of my life. Dylan had left to drive Isiah home, and now this handsome man and I were left with nothing but liquor and our own thoughts. “I cannot believe Isiah admitted that to him though.”

I couldn’t help but shrug. “I think they’ll work it out,” I then told him. “I mean… we started dating in September and I told you I loved you by November.”

“Carson,” Don sighed quickly, “we started dating officially in November you fucking idiot.”

“Five years,” I countered, taking another sip. “Don’t forget we had five years of sheer angst.”

“You proclaim it every chance you get, love. How could I possibly ever forget .”

And him just calling me love made me proclaim “bedroom. Now ,” to him.

That made my husband’s face grow bright red, but he quickly shook his head no. “W-We have so much l-larger fish to fry,” he told me seriously, causing me to set my wine glass back onto the kitchen island before I advanced my husband. My right hand plucked that wine glass right out of his left hand and set it on the counter top to the back right of him before suddenly wrapping my hands around the back of his thighs and picking him right on up.

He was used to it by now- eight years of me placing him on every surface I could possibly find whenever I could. He was used to the feel of me, and yet the smallest things still got him flushed. I didn’t think it was possible to love someone this fucking much.

“Whatever makes you happy is what I prioritize. Always .”

“You always make me happy,” he replied, pulling from me the most massive smile. “And thank you for talking to Isiah. You always were the best with him.”

That made me lightly laugh. “I’m a bro to him. You’re the dad figure. And you’ve always met the needs he needed. I just meet his wants.”

“Yeah well our dear lover boy is going through a crisis. Only right that I send a man in who understands.” He replied.

“Oh so you don’t think you’re a lover boy yourself?” I questioned as I yanked him closer to me by his thighs.

“A-As I recall, you’re the one who popped the question- the one who pursued me ,” he whispered back.

“Do you remember Oregon?” I asked quietly, which made Don’s arms tighten around me instantly. “I love knowing I could make you that happy.”

“D-Don’t-… don’t discredit our wedding either,” he replied in the same hushed tone.

“You were a mess then,” I reminded him. “Just a glorious bundle of nerves.”

“I didn’t… I-I didn’t expect your Nana to walk me down the aisle,” he whispered back, resting his head gently on my chest. The way Don cried into my suit that day was honestly the most beautiful moment. I hadn’t seen that much emotion from him before, but for some stupid reason, it had never occurred to me that he didn’t have anyone to walk with him down that aisle. His only family was his son and Lisa. We hadn’t even rehearsed it either, but my Nana just volunteered herself with zero hesitation.

She always was good with that stuff. Knowing what people needed. Her passing on hit Don and I  massively hard, and Hobbs wasn’t in the condition to travel.

We were also still losing money every year Don’s dad made it around the sun again, which knowing Don, I knew pissed him the hell off.

“I’m happy you got that moment with her. Wasn’t the most conventional thing I must say, but what the actual hell was actually conventional about our wedding?” I questioned quietly, causing Don to chuckle into my chest.

“Maybe the proposal?” He offered, making myself laugh.

“You tackled me afterward, remember? Then we stayed that way for like an hour,” I reminded him, coercing another chuckle.

“It was… a lot,” he admitted. “You should’ve seen how I reacted to being a father. Adding someone else to the family so soon- trusting me enough to accept my own mess of a family… nothing will beat your first visit with my father, or any visit that followed… it meant a lot.”

“ I know ,“ I whispered as my hands travelled upward to stroke his back. “I know because I’ve seen it. You’ve kept your word about him never knowing about Dylan. You’ve done everything to keep that part- that light away from him.”

“Dylan’s dealt with enough,” Don returned. “Those are my demons, not his. And anything I can do to protect him, I will. If I could’ve encapsulated him at that age- at the ten year old boy who showed up on my doorstep all those years ago, I would’ve. He’s heading to the big leagues with college, but I’ll never stop protecting him within my ability to.”

“ And I love you for that ,“ I told him. “I might push back on some of your punishments, but you’re doing what you can to mold him into the best version of himself. All these years later and you’ve still never raised your voice once. Dylan still won’t hug anyone before you do. His safe haven will always be you, and I understand that dynamic in full now. I’m just here to feed into his wants every once in awhile.” I couldn’t help but laugh.

“The way you two gang up on me feels like I’m being jumped,” Don replied, making me laugh even harder.

“Yet there’s that spark in your eyes,” I countered, “above all else, you always made sure he remained a child . You’ve handled a lot behind the scenes, and I think you seeing Dylan enjoy himself brings you joy. This last year has been hard for you- for us

• but if Dylan and Isiah being together is what makes him happier, let’s support that… yeah? Let’s trust we’ve done enough as parents for Dylan to come to us when he needs to. I just want him to know we’re here.“

Don nodded slowly. “Thank you… y-you’ve always been better with the emotional stuff…”

“And that’s because you always handled the hard stuff. You might complain along the way, but you make sure shit gets done. And there’s a part of Dylan… the abuse he experienced… I could never relate to it . It’s a part of him that you always recognized and adjusted yourself to. I’ll keep reminding you that that’s important. It’s note worthy. And you adjust my parenting to meet him where he’s at, always .”

That just made Don’s hands tighten even further. “What… what were you saying about the bedroo-”

He didn’t even finish that sentence before I picked him up off this countertop.

The thing about us was that we were always better at showing our love than telling.

And that said a whole lot, because intimate moments like this always proved just how good we had gotten at communicating with each other.

For a man who usually plagued his dialogue with harsh insults… he made sure to add some weight to his words when speaking to either me or his son.

••

38. I Love You

Enjoy, lovelies. I’ll get these edited and posted on Substack tomorrow!

Not me forgetting to add Warning: Explicit Content lol

Isiah

I was freaking out. I was totally freaking the complete fuck out.

Carson did what he could to try and calm me down the entire evening, but once I entered that car with Dylan, I immediately regretted not just having my mum pick me up. Or Carson drive me home. Anything but this.

I mean, the silence was fucking deadly , and the distance between my home and his was no where far enough for us to even begin to fix my massive fuck up. So I just kept silent as Dylan drove, praying this would all be over soon enough. I know Carson basically told me to just be honest and real with Dylan, but fuck , we were in this awkward shit show to begin with because I was all too fucking honest and real.

Now I didn’t know where we were at.

Fuck! I told myself I’d go slow, but I just-… I got so caught up in the moment. Dylan had just… the way he touched me… the way those light eyes had found mine right as complete pleasure cut through me… god, the way he fucking held me … it… it was too much. And I was already so fucking nervous that he might not like what we did, but he did. He showed me every way he could that he did.

All that just made me say something so so so stupid.

“Isiah,” Dylan whispered quietly, turning to me for a second after having had a good amount of this drive in the most awkward silence of at least my entire life.

“L-L-Let’s not talk about it,” I shot out quickly. We were near enough to my home, I just had to make it like another five minutes and this would all be over.

I’d be able to leave this car, which honestly felt suffocating as fuck at the moment.

But as we started to pull up to my apartment, and Dylan put the car into park, he reached for my left arm quickly, stopping me from unbuckling my seat belt.

“ Isiah ,“ he whispered yet again, which forced my eyes to his within the dim lighting of the street lights. “Y-You’re not leaving things like this between us. Please… j-just talk to me.”

God, the way his voice was stern yet gentle just made me melt in this leather seat. “I-I’m sorry,” I whispered carefully. “I-I-I fucked up. I-… I shouldn’t have said that then- I-I-”

“D-Did you mean it?” He asked quietly, holding my gaze with those perfect light eyes.

Shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit.

I couldn’t stop myself from slowly nodding. I couldn’t tell this man that I didn’t- that it was a lie. I had been in love with him for literally years, and if all this was going to crash and burn outside my apartment tonight, I wouldn’t lie to him in the process.

“But we can just forget I said it- said anything. Please Dylan, let’s just forget that I-”

“ Shut the fuck up, Isiah ,“ Dylan muttered quietly to me, which did successfully shut me the hell up. His hand let go of my arm, but he moved it upwards to the back of my neck as he pulled me a bit closer across the middle console. “I… I… I love you, too ,” he then whispered to me as he made sure my eyes held his. Nothing but his. My breathing had been sporadic all evening, but this for sure took the fucking cake.

My heartbeat was just a goddamn mess as soon as I heard those words fall past his lips… but my doubt was still somewhat there, buried deep. I was still telling myself things that were seriously ruining this perfect moment.

“Y-You d-don’t-… d-don’t say it just bec-”

I didn’t even finish that sentence before Dylan leant forward and closed that distance between us, kissing me gently as he captured my lower lip with his. I felt his soft lips mutter against my own, “ I fucking love you, Isiah ,“ and though he pulled away soon after, making this kiss a brief one, I swear to god I’ve never needed more right then and there.

Dylan must of felt it too- how much more I needed than just that kiss- because his next few words were “ g-get

over here .“

I unbuckled my seat fast while he quickly did the same, lifting myself up over the middle console before I brought my lips quickly back to his, straddling him with my legs. “I-I’m s-sorry-” I whispered quietly into this kiss, yet Dylan shook his head no, pulling away slightly to look at me.

“I-I’m sorry y-you’ve been so nervous.” He replied with an unreal amount of care. Fuck , I was so in love with him it literally clouded everything else. He made my heart beat so desperately for him that this all just felt like a dream.

“C-Can you… c-can you say it a-again?” I asked, my voice barely a fucking whisper now. I still couldn’t believe this confession… I needed to hear it just once more to let me know that this was all real. That he… he really felt the same as me.

Dylan immediately nodded. “ I love you ,“ he murmured, successfully luring my lips slowly back to his soft ones again, moaning deeply into this kiss as I moved mine against his with even more urgent passion. Dylan’s hands quickly went to my thighs, pulling me down harder onto him and letting me feel with my own stiffening cock just how fucking into this he really was.

What I wasn’t expecting, however, was for his hands to glide up my thighs, then waist, sending shivers through me before they started to push back on my flannel, moving those large hands up under my undershirt. Fuck, I was so fucking weak to him

to his

touch , and right now I needed more. I was the one this time to break this intense kiss to fully pull off my shirt, then yanked off my undershirt, and the way Dylan’s eyes raked over me made me fully fucking shudder.

Those eyes of his darkened with a swiftness.

Luckily he did the same by yanking off his own sweater, allowing me to finally, finally see him completely shirtless. And Jesus fucking Christ , my hands were on him immediately. I ended up reaching down for the lever of the car seat near the drivers door to drop the seat back, and the way we looked at each other once we were laying all the way back, made my stomach do summersaults.

It made me question whether we could go all the way tonight.

This was intense. Like really fucking intense.

My hands then moved to his zipper, wanting to see Dylan cum like it was a damn necessity, and he took me aback yet again by reaching for my own, slipping his hand past my jeans and briefs straight to my leaking cock. I couldn’t help dipping my head down into the side of his neck as I grabbed his own hard cock, but Dylan’s free hand moved to my hair and pulled me back up.

“L-Let me… l-let me see, baby.”

… Man I almost fucking came from purely that alone, my god . Then Dylan did something which completely shifted the intensity of this situation. He brought that hand away from my curls, down to my neck, and wrapped his long fingers around the front of it. He didn’t squeeze hard, but he held me upwards firmly as we started jacking each other off, and that just about launched me off a fucking cliff.

“I-Is- sh-sh-shit

• is this o-okay?“ He asked, unsure if it was too much.

I could only nod as more and more moans erupted from me. The way this felt- it sent pleasure throughout my entire body, surprising me by how incredible it felt- how incredible he looked right now below me, completely bare chest with one hand around my neck while the other stroked me relentlessly.

“I-I-I-… I love you,” I whispered out to him with a clear deep rasp, and Dylan’s whole face tightened.

“Say it-… s-say it a-again,” he whispered, making my toes curl inside my sneakers and my eyelids lower. His skin was starting to get fully flushed.

I wanted to shut my eyes from the intensity of this once I felt his hand pick up the pace… but god, the way his eyes bore into mine? I couldn’t look away from him. I simply couldn’t. The way those light eyes held so much intensity behind them was making me weaker and weaker.

“I… I-I l-love-” my words were cut off by the deepest groan as I felt myself reaching my climax all too fucking quickly. I wanted this to last as long as fucking possible but this position was too much. “I l-love y-you,” I stuttered, my moans simply free falling at this point, and Dylan’s face tightened further.

“A-Again I-Isiah,” he moaned out, causing me to shake against him. I was going to cum soon… but the look of absolute pleasure on Dylan’s face told me he might actually cum before I did. And I wanted to hold out for that. I wanted to see that perfect face in ecstasy. My hand moved faster, pumping his massive dick with longer strokes which were making his body start to lightly spasm. “A-Again,” he insisted as his hand tightened around my neck ever so slightly, and that fucking did it.

“I-I- fffuck

• I-… I… l-love y-y-you-“ I could barely choke that sentence out before Dylan made me cum. Hard . I mean if it weren’t for that hand of his holding me up by my neck, I probably would’ve collapsed right on top of him. What made it even more intense was that Dylan came right after, continuing to pump everything out of my shaft as I did the same, and he made sure my eyes never wandered from his.

He made sure I saw every bit of this.

God he was just so handsome. So perfect . He took charge in ways that made me completely weak to him, and his communication- he always checked in, which made me feel so… safe . I wanted to explore more of this more dominant side to him. I wanted to see what else he maybe wanted to try.

I was so caught up in this moment with him, both of us breathless, shaking messes, with how he insisted- demanded I tell him I love him again and again… how he had admitted the same feelings for me… that I didn’t notice anyone approach the fogging windows of this car until there was a knock on the passenger side window, and unfortunately it wasn’t fogged up enough to mask the woman who had turned her back towards us to give us privacy.

“O-O-Oh my god- oh my f-f-fucking god-”

It was my fucking mum .

“So…” my mum started as we both sat across from each other at the dinner table. Luckily she at least allowed me to change after I gave Dylan the most rushed goodbye, and she managed to say the most awkward hello then goodbye to him, with him simply apologizing in a frazzled state, before leading her and I inside.

My heart was still drumming like all hell inside me, and at first that was because of how hard I had came… the position Dylan had me in, and how hard he came, before we quickly rushed to get dressed… but now it was pounding because my mum-… she had-… fuck .

“I-It’s not what it looked like,” I tried to say, but the look my mother gave me told me to be all the way so fucking for real right now.

“Isiah… you were both shirtless had your hands down each others pants, a sight I’m quickly scraping from my memory might I add-”

“I’m so sorry!” I rushed out as my panic only intensified.

“Well I mean… don’t apologize for being with Dylan… but doing all that in a car , Isiah, that’s pretty fucking illegal and you know that.”

“I know, I know, I know, it’s just that he… he like… he… admitted to me in the car that he… he loves me.”

That made my mum’s eyebrows raise to damn near her hairline.

“ What the hell have I missed? That’s… that’s a lot, Isiah.“

“I know,” I nodded, “and I kinda sorta admitted to him earlier today that I love him when we-… when we were-”

“You can spare me the details, kid,” my mum spoke seriously, forcing another nod from me. “When did all this start? He’s only been back a few weeks. I thought you two had just stopped talking as friends,” but I silently shook my head no.

“I… I sort of… kissed him before he left for Ireland, and I was so worried about how he’d feel about it so I bolted out out of his place and just cut off all communication from him for a year.”

“You… you did what? “ My mother took a scolding tone with me immediately. “That’s now how we raised you, Isiah. Jacobs don’t run from problems.”

“I know, I know, I really fucked up, and I just- I couldn’t talk to him. I couldn’t face how I felt, so I just shut it all out, and I couldn’t tell you how I felt because I didn’t know how you’d react.” I rushed all those words out in what felt like a singular breath.

“Isiah, I don’t give a shit that you’re gay… I give a shit about Dylan . I give a shit about you . You’ve been struggling so hard this last year and I-… I just thought it was because Dylan wasn’t physically here. I didn’t know it was about you loving him. Figuring out your sexuality is a major thing-”

“Oh no, I’ve been sure that I’ve always been gay,” I told my mum. “I just… I wasn’t sure how to handle my feelings towards Dylan. He’s never been with anyone , and even now, I’m trying to take things slow-”

“What you two were doing in that car didn’t look like it.” My mum interrupted with.

“ Trying is the key word here. The guy can be … persistent … and I’ve dreamed about being with him for so long, I didn’t know what to do. I don’t know how to say no to him- I don’t want to say no, even though things are moving so fast. He makes me so happy, mum.“ I tried to explain.

“I know, kiddo,” she replied quietly. “I can see it all over you. You both. Dylan looked the most lovestruck I’d ever seen him tonight when we said goodbye, but I want you two to be safe. Use protection and all that. And no more fucking public places, definitely not at school, got it?”

I nodded quickly. This had started as a hot mess, but my mum still managed to pull herself together. “I’ll let you decide when we’re going to tell your father, that’s gotta be your call to make, alright?”

I quickly nodded again. My lord , I really didn’t deserve this woman as a mum, but she simply smiled my way before shooing me with her hands. “Well get going then. If y’all were doing all that before Carson and Don got home, I’m guessing no actual schoolwork got done. Go get to it.”

And I had never sprung up from a chair so fast. Fuck, I almost bowed to my mother right before literally bolting to my bedroom, and as soon as I got situated in bed, the first thing I did was ring up Dylan.

He picked up that call after the first ring.

“Does your mum hate me?” Was the very first thing out of his mouth, which honestly made me abruptly chuckle.

“What? No. She’d never,” I assured him.

“She just… she seemed really standoffish when I said hello and goodbye so I just… I got worried…”

“She… well, she did just catch us with our hands down each other’s pants… I think she was trying to process all this.” I admitted. My mum was good at adjusting usually, but this one… this one was admittedly a lot. Especially after the last year her and I had.

“What did… w-what did you, like, tell her?”

“The truth,” I replied quietly. “That I love you… that I kissed you then fucked up this last year between us…”

“A-And it-… it went okay?” Dylan asked.

“Yeah. She won’t tell my dad until I decide to, and she strictly banned us doing anything like that again in a public place-”

“I-I-I’m sorry about that-”

“Don’t apologize, you already rushed out like 20 apologies during the span of the few minutes she spoke with you tonight,” I replied swiftly. “After you… well, after you admitted your own feelings, there was no way I wasn’t touching you.”

Dylan lightly chuckled at that. “I’m sorry I’ve been so… intense … but having you ignore me the whole evening sent me fucking spiraling. I want you to talk to me, okay? Don’t-… don’t get like that again. Don’t shut me out.”

“Okay,” I answered with zero hesitation. “I- I will. I promise.”

“You were so scared,” he whispered, causing me to run my free hand through my hair nervously. “It scared me, Isiah.”

“I’m sorry, I-”

“What did I say about apologizing?” He asked, which made me smile.

“I’m not apologizing for being scared. I’m apologizing for not talking to you about it. I shut you out for a whole year.” I reminded him. “Hell, my mum was more pissed off about how I treated you then than what she just caught us doing now. I should’ve never treated you like that.”

“It’s okay,” Dylan replied earnestly. “I just- I just want that communication back. We would’ve never admitted our real feelings to each other without that communication, and hearing you say it again and again like that… you have no idea what it did to me.” Dylan’s voice got a whole lot rougher for a moment there. “My parents also definitely know about us by the way they looked at me once I got back, and my mum is joining us for dinner on Monday so I’ll pull her to the side to tell her.”

God, that made my heart fucking flutter.

“Now that my own mum knows, I don’t care who we tell… I just… I just want to openly be with you…” I admitted.

“Me too-”

“But my mum will kill me if we do literally anything at school. And I mean that Dylan,” I warned him in all seriousness. If he touched me, I wouldn’t say no. Especially not after what we both just said and did in his car. I could still feel the firmness of his hand on my neck, holding me in that straddled position, and if it wasn’t for the awkwardness of the conversation I just had with my mum, I’d probably be jerking off right now to the memory of it.

Knowing she witnessed probably the most intimate moment between Dylan and I was insane for me to even begin to process.

Honestly this whole day with him minus dinner was the most intimate we had been together. Those eyes of his held contact with mine through everything, and feeling his warm cum on my hand… it was all so hot until I heard that knock on the window. And having my mum physically watch me wash my hands once we got inside was just purely embarrassing.

“You have my word,” Dylan insisted, but I trusted that word of his just about as far as I could throw this giant.

The way he was on me as soon as we got to his apartment complex this afternoon…

Yeah, Dylan didn’t know the meaning of keeping his hands to himself.

And secretly, I was absolutely addicted to it. To him.

••

39. Act Normal

I got fucking t-boned this last weekend so just bear with me these next few weeks

xoxo

Dylan

“You’re up late,” my dad noted as soon as I entered the living room Saturday morning, rubbing sleep from my eyes. He was making breakfast, and by the scent filling our home alone, I knew it was a Dublin breakfast. God, I was so ready for his homemade sausages .

“Yeah I was up late with Isiah, finishing up our chem project over the phone.” I explained. I started to head towards the living room, but my dad beckoned me over with his hand, asking me to join him as he whisked the eggs for a hearty scramble.

“You two finish?” my Pops asked, and I nodded. Isiah had really done so much, that I had to fully lock in last night. I couldn’t let him carry my weight, and the way we were able to finalize shit, lock down our detailed explanation, was absolutely everything.

I had never had a better school partner. He and I always felt disgusted whenever we even remotely thought we were just slapping our name on something without contributing, and that was why we worked so well together in the first place. Some would call us try-hards, but we held our work ethic to the highest standard with our academics. Everything we did, we made sure it was quality over quantity. Nothing was pushed out half assed.

“So… I have a question to ask,” I started, heading towards the sink to wash my hands because I already knew I was about to be on sausage making duty. My dad had all the fixings out for it, including the ground venison meat that he had mixed his own herbs and spices into. It was his secret recipe, and I partially thought that he kept it a secret because Carson loved it so much.

He once mentioned it was all part of the high husband price he had which made me outwardly laugh because as far as I knew, there wasn’t a dowry on the table when they wed, and if anything, my dad was the reason Carson even had such a high savings account.

Good Ol’ Pops was frugal as fuck .

“Before you ask me, ask yourself the question and think about whether there is even a slight possibility I will say yes.” My father instructed, making me roll my eyes. I only felt comfortable enough to do so because my back was still to him as I lathered soap on my hands.

“Don’t be mean,” Carson spoke as he emerged from the corridor.

“ I told you to stay in bed ,“ my dad grumbled as he cracked a few more eggs. “You were up practically all night.”

“Please,” I begged, turning towards my dad to join him at the kitchen island. “ Spare my ears .“

“Get your mind out of the gutter,” my father replied quickly. Honestly, it made me smile that my father’s accent was still slipping through, even though we were back in the New York. After the last year we had in Ireland, I could tell that he felt more comfortable to show that side of him.

“I was actually handling management for the apartment property. Your dad and I are getting ready to finally open it up for unit rentals.”

“Really?” I asked in clear shock, turning to Carson who was all but stumbling towards the kitchen island with exhaustion written all over him, to take his front row seat in front of my dad and I.

“Yeah,” Carson yawned. “We’ve made a lot of changes, and I’m trying to get things underway before your father and I celebrate our anniversary next year. Your father surprised me with-”

“ Shut the fuck up, Carson ,“ my dad shushed Carson immediately. “We’ll talk about that later.”

I glanced up from the meat I was further mixing my dad’s chopped green onions into, to glance up at him, but he shook his head no.

God, this man sure did love his secrets .

“Now what were you going to ask me?” He asked, changing the subject swiftly.

“Well…” I started as I began loading the sausage maker with the meat. “Molly wants to go camping this next weekend.”

That made my dad’s and Carson’s eyebrows raise slightly. “Dylan, you’ve got some terrible allergies.” My dad was quick to say.

“ I know ,“ I insisted, “but it’s more like a weekend at a cabin. It’s only about an hour drive from here, further upstate.”

“And who exactly will be driving?” my dad asked, but I knew this was probably going to break these plans as a whole.

“I would be driving Isiah, but Molly is driving up with another friend. The friend’s dad owns-”

“No,” my good ol’ Pops deadpanned.

“Hold up, hold up, hold up,” Carson was the one to interject immediately, surprising me by the speed in which he was coming to my defense right now. “When was the last time we had a date night, baby?” he asked my dad. “Why don’t you and I visit New Jersey this coming weekend while Dylan’s away? Stop by La Belle, rent a hotel for the weekend? We’ve gotten so busy these last few years that I haven’t really been able to show you more of the state, and Antoine asks about you. Constantly .”

I was so fucking grateful for Carson because honestly, I had nothing up my sleeve to convince my dad to let me go. Just my charm and wits was all I was relying on right now.

“That… doesn’t sound terrible,” my father replied carefully. “But I want your location on 24/7.” He added, turning his head slightly towards me.

“It’s always on,” I replied quickly.

“And I want a phone call when you arrive,” He added.

“Consider it done,” I assured him.

“What are the exact plans?” Carson asked me. “Like what day are you heding there and coming back? I can run you something for gas since I know your father’s car is a guzzler.”

“Molly texted me this morning,” I explained. “I think we’re looking at leaving after school this Friday and heading back Sunday morning. Molly wants to get her Halloween costume together since the first day of of October will be this coming Friday.”

“Have you thought of what you want to be this year?” My dad asked. “You and Carson take it far too seriously every year, I don’t want you to spring something on me last minute. It’s going to be a challenge to get your size in shit you know.”

I nodded quickly. “Isiah and I were thinking Teen Titans, me being Raven and him Beast Boy. I’ll see if he maybe wants to go shopping once we get back on Sunday since it sounds like Molly is having a small get together this year.”

“Get together, aye?” My dad asked. Clearly he wasn’t buying my bullshit.

“Yeah,” I did my best to lie convincingly, “you already know how I feel about parties. I was just thinking of going because it’s Molly… is that okay?”

My father looked over at me for one good, long moment, turning to Carson who gave him a slow nod, before my father eventually came around, nodding himself. “Alright,” he sighed, “you are an adult after all. And Molly hasn’t given us a reason yet to deem her home as unsafe. I want all your homework done before hand though, Dylan, this home will swiftly become a prison if you push anything off. Remember what I told you about rewards.”

“Yes, dad,” I replied, teasing him slightly with my tone, but neither he nor I missed the large grin on my face.

“Now,” he sighed again, “we’re hosting on Monday. I’m thinking we go Italian. You still remember the recipes I showed you all those years ago? We haven’t made it in some time.”

I nodded immediately. “Prosciutto di Parma, Stracciatella Soup, and Rosemary Focaccia. Some of my all time favourite dishes.”

“Good,” my dad nodded with a smile towards me, all while Carson was grinning ear to fucking ear at that revelation. “I’m adding Bistecca Fiorentina, Risotto, and Arancini. I know how much you love steak dishes so I think you’ll appreciate the Fiorentina.”

That alone made me smile, because meat was truly the love of my life, and my father always got a prime cut. Whenever we were down in Texas was my aboslute favourite, because Carson always took me hunting.

As I got older, my dad didn’t shy away from letting me be part of the process from start to finish, allowing Carson to show me just how he and his family always utilized every single bit of the animal, not allowing anything to go to waste and fully honoring the life that was taken in the process.

It was absolutely incredible.

“Thanks Pops,” I smiled his way, to which he nodded, still having a few inches on me as he leant down to give my forehead a soft kiss before adjusting the way I was starting to use this sausage maker.

Monday took way too fucking long to get here.

I mean it was just trudging along at this point.

Isiah was busy helping his dad clear out some of their storage unit up north, working to finally get rid of the rental unit so they could save on some money while Isiah was at college, so I tried not to bother him Saturday and Sunday, even though he kept the texts coming in consistently as all hell, checking up on me while I was forced to clean the whole home top to bottom with my dad and Carson in preparation for dinner Monday, before going to the local markets for some ingredients for the dinner we were hosting.

I alternated between texting him and my mum, who for the first time in a long time, actually had a slow period at work.

She was really excited for the dinner Monday, and I was too. Our schedule just hadn’t aligned since me and my dads got home from Ireland, so this was the first time I’d get to see her.

Isiah also confirmed Sunday afternoon that his mum had given him the okay for the cabin trip this next weekend, and I let him know I would be able to drive us.

Honestly I was more excited just to be alone with Isiah for an hour while I drove. I already knew roadtrip snacks would be essential, but Isiah was the only person in the world who could put me on to the coolest fucking music. His taste meshed so well with mine, I literally couldn’t wait to pass the AUX and let his Spotify account run wild.

Once Monday morning rolled around, I spent a great deal picking out an outfit because we would be coming straight here after class. The downside was that my dad and Carson were working from home today, so there would be no repeat of friday, where I got this handsome man to myself again, but it would still feel like old times getting to help out my dad and Carson with Isiah joining in.

I was hoping that he and I would get the chance to play some video games, yet since Derek was coming too, I already knew he’d be pushing for us to spend at least an hour catching up on gaming news.

I also wanted to see if I could get my hands on his new, unreleased comic. I had every single issue he had written, courtesy of the nerdy man himself who made sure to send me the issues ahead of schedule for print and release.

He was working on a spin-off to his Sherlock Homes detective novel, something Isiah and I had waited damn near four years for him to continue with. I loved everything he dropped, but this was the novel that started it all with Onyx. It was so fucking rivetting, Isiah and I used to pull all nighters unbenownst to my father when we had sleepovers, reading the comics front to back as we hid under the covers with a flashlight.

Derek, however eccentric he was, was beloved by me and Isiah. My father definitely tolerated him though. They were complete opposites, and John honestly had very little dicipline when it came to his husband. I mean he did, but also didn’t. It was strange, but my father told me long ago to never ask about the intricacies of their relationship, and I listened.

I was also excited to see Herold. My dad fucking hated that cat, but I really did believe that he had calmed down over the years. He was getting up there in age, and the way Derek was with him was special. Herold had never hurt me, large in part because he really liked Derek… but my father didn’t miss a chance to tell John just how good his fur would look as a rug in our bathroom if that feline so much as looked at me incorrectly.

That energy didn’t lighten up a single smidge over the years either.

As Monday came around and I got dressed, then left, allowing those two old geezers to sleep in a bit because the whole weekend seemed to drain my dad and Carson, I instead booked it to school. I mean I was outta there in record timing, trying to get to school with at least a bit of time to see Isiah.

God, I knew we saw each other Friday but every passing day I didn’t get to be with him just made me feel like decades had passed. And maybe it was my own trauma, having been shut out for so long with the year I was gone. I was too excited now about everything- dinner tonight, the cabin this coming weekend…

I had a great deal of money in my savings, so I was already planning on splurging a bit on outfits for the cabin. Molly mentioned a hot tub, which meant I needed new swim trunks, and perhaps some more athletic gear for hiking since I just knew Molly was going to drag us all through the impending wilderness.

My dad had already gone on quite a few side missions Sunday to make sure all my allergy medication was fully stocked- I had sensitive skin like he did, granting us a lot of the same prescriptions, but he was more concerned about the concentrated pollen.

That shit rocked us hard during the cooler months.

I pulled into the almost empty parking lot in damn near lightning speeds, rushing into the school I knew was about to be far more overcrowded just minutes from now. And when I saw a familiar handsome man leaning against my locker, scrolling through his phone, my heart beat sped up immediately.

Isiah was wearing a button-down shirt paired with his leather jacket, and black jeans that made my damn heart simply take flight. I didn’t even have to say a word before his eyes detached from his phone screen, and his eyes met mine as I took the largest strides towards him.

“H-Hi,” he started all too nervously, but my hand finally reaching for him, pulling him in by his jacket before my arm snaked around the small of his back and pulled him into me, bringing my lips to his quickly.

Fuck, I fucking missed him so fucking much.

Fuck…

Isiah let an unexpected moan slip past his lips as I damn near kissed him senseless, pressing him back against my locker quickly, unwilling to stop this incredible feeling- the innate softness of his lips against mine as he started to kiss me back with just as much fucking urgency.

My hands fell past his leather jacket, gliding up under his dress shirt to feel his bare skin. I was unable to hold myself even remotely back, especially as I felt Isiah reacting against me… but once I started to get a bit too lost in this, lowerering my hand past Isiah’s waist to something I wanted to feel desperately, Isiah nudged me away from him.

“D-D-Dylan,” he stuttered breathllessly from the kiss I had just pulled him into. “Y-You promised,” he then reminded me.

“L-Let’s go t-to my car,” I mumbled in a breathless state of my own, but Isiah quickly shook his head no.

“W-We don’t- we don’t have much time before-”

He couldn’t even finish that sentence before we both heard the first bell ring.

Fuck.

Fucking fuck , I couldn’t help but think. I was too late with getting here. Isiah was right, we didn’t have any time to run back to my car.

“Shit,” I mumbled, giving Isiah a small bit of space as the halls started to fill up more. The final bell would ring in about five minutes, signaling the actual start of first period.

“It’s okay,” Isiah tried to assure me, taking a step to the side so I could open the locker I had most definitely just pinned him against, to grab the books I needed. Once I got the hunk of metal open then closed however, Isiah did something I sure as fucking hell didn’t expect.

He placed his right hand into mine, lacing his fingers with my own, and as the hallway continued to fill up, this handsome man just looked up at me, trying to gauge how comfortable I felt about all this. What he didn’t understand was that I was absolutely insane about him. I couldn’t even begin to describe how much I just wanted to show every fucking person that he was mine .

God, I wanted him so fucking bad.

My larger fingers tangled within his immediately, pulling his hand into mine. I could see a few people start to stare, but Isiah didn’t give a fuck. He was serious about his stance on this. He didn’t care what anyone else thought. And we never had before. Ever. It was what I loved most about him- he only cared about the people who had the weight to weigh in about who he was as a person.

Being able to call him mine meant fucking everything .

••

40. We’re Taking First

Just sliding this chapter on in here lol

Also Chapter 2 of Bodies will be up on Substack by tonight or tomorrow morning!

God I’ve been having a blast with that one

xoxo

Isiah

It was safe to say this school day was a complete mess.

If it wasn’t for Zinfel’s deathly glares, I would have been staring at this unbelievably handsome man the entire period. Literally.

That kiss this morning had me genuinely contemplating just skipping today as a whole, but we had to turn in our projects for Chem fourth period, and Dylan had a test his sixth period, which meant this gorgeous giant and I were quite literally forced to complete the entire school day.

We wouldn’t know our full results until tomorrow, however I’d argue that judging by the complete mean mugging stares we were getting from almost every student in this class while Dylan and I presented our findings for our project up front… we were sure as hell taking gold.

I just had to keep reminding myself to relax- to not look over at him as much otherwise I was going to be a goner with remembering anything else. Like when he pushed me back against those lockers… the way his cool fingers slid under my jacket and shirt to simply touch more of me…

Yeah. I had to not think about all that shit.

I was excited to see John, Derek and Herold, but I wanted more time alone with this handsome guy standing next to me, rambling off our parameters we had built for our assignment. I had to keep reminding myself of our soon to be time alone at the cabin this next weekend. I know Molly probably wanted this to be some involved group trip, but I was fully planning on treating it like a lovers getaway for Dylan and I, I didn’t give a shit.

All of my outfits were already picked out by the end of this last weekend, with a few flannels and inside shirts included, because the way he looked at me Friday while I was wearing one, was the hottest thing I had ever experienced.

The way his hands slid under that undershirt with pure need …

I could still feel his touch against my skin when he kissed me this morning. He had looked so utterly perfect that I had no way of trying to fight my own urges. I mean he was literally just a second from palming me through my jeans in the freaking school hallway, the only thing stopping me from just allowing it at that point from how horny I was, was the fact that my mum had given me two very simple orders while accepting this relationship:

Wear protection, and keep our hands to ourselves anywhere public. Especially school, which was something Dylan and I had broken on like day five of this relationship.

I was still all too ashamed of how willing I was in that janitors closet, I swear to god…

Far too fucking comfortable doing something so crazy, and Molly being the one to find us was truly a blessing and a curse in itself. I just knew she was going to be a hassle to deal with during this trip. A whole force to be reckoned with while Dylan toughed it out with his allergies.

Thinking about taking care of him was pretty fucking cute though. He was always thinking about what others needed… it would be nice to get the opportunity to do the same.

After Chem, it was lunch at the bleachers as usual. I made a slight detour to the welding shop myself while Dylan was far too kind to gather both our lunches and bring them out there. Once I had the artifact in question all wrapped up, I booked it outside, not wanting to waste even a second of the actual alone time we now got to have. This might have been our last opportunity for the day besides the short drive to Dylan’s for dinner.

Dylan was already sitting straddled on the usual bench we took, just far enough from the empty field for more privacy, but not too high up because the guy sometimes got bouts of vertigo going down these steep steps. Especially now that his height had skyrocketed.

It was a wonder how Molly could run up and down them with such ease, but I knew that once her nerves took over, there was no stopping the lengths she’d take with exercising it out of her system.

As soon as Dylan heard me jogging up the steps, he turned to me with a stellar smile spreading across those perfect lips of his… then I watched his dark brows crease somewhat in confusion at the newspaper wrapped item in my hand while I entered our usual row to shift past him and take a straddled seat directly in front of this gorgeous man.

He had set both our lunch bags on the platform to my right so he could shift a little closer to me, examining the item I eventually handed over for him to take.

“Oh shit… shit , Isiah,” he muttered, feeling the heavy weight of what the newspapers were covering. He didn’t wait a second more to unwrap everything in wicked timing, discarding the newspaper to the side to reveal exactly what he was uncovering…

And when he saw the very thing I had spent the last few weeks working on, I got to witness in real time his entire jaw practically lower itself to the ground.

He knew I was making us an award for first place, in welding, but he clearly didn’t expect me to make a fully solid brass metal miniature statue of The Thinking Man, yet in the statue of the man’s lowered hand was a metal beaker to signify our assured win in Chem.

“ Sh-Shut the fuck up, Isiah ,“ he whispered, holding the statue so delicately in those long fingers of his even though I made certain that it would take a whole lot of force to break. “I… I-I was expecting some medals or something…” his deep voice trailed off. He was turning the thing slower in his hand, taking in the details which I had to admit kicked my whole ass to make.

The rock The Thinking Man was sitting on took me countless hours alone.

I mean it was just… fuck , I wanted to rip my hairs out at some point, but the way it turned out was completely worth it.

Seeing Dylan now right in front of me, intensely admiring every single part of it made my heart start to lose herself again.

He liked it. Like he really, really liked-

“I fucking love this, Isiah! Like what the complete fuck- how did you- when did you…?”

“Sometimes between periods. Sometimes I went a bit over on time, eating into my next period. My teach, Mr. Williams, he’d get everything ready for me before I even entered class, allowing me to work away while he taught… so really, if you’re going to thank anyone-”

“ You’re fucking amazing, you know that right? “ Dylan asked in just a slightly lower voice as his eyes snapped up to mine. The way those light eyes damn near bore through to my soul did literally anything but help me even attempt to cool down.

Hell, I found myself quickly breaking this gaze because I simply could not handle it. He had been admiring the statue for a long minute, turning it over again and again in his massive hands, but when I saw him gently set it on the bleacher bench right above us, to where I had tried to safely divert my gaze and cool the heat rising at a rapid rate to my face, I knew I was completely and utterly screwed…

In like the best way possible , I couldn’t help but think once I saw his large hands reach forward for my thighs and he damn near yanked me onto his lap, forcing my legs open wider around him and my eyes on his again as his face was just inches from my own now.

The movement was so sudden, I couldn’t help but reach out to grab at the soft deep brown sweater and light blue button-down shirt he was wearing, a stylistic choice in honor of our presentation today, and probably the dinner this evening.

I had expected such unadulterated heat out of him, I mean just sheer unholiness by the way he was looking at me now, pushing the limits of my heart… but once he leant in, his eyes drifting closed as he brought his lips softly to mine, I all but melted into this gentle, tender kiss.

I felt his left hand reach up to cup the side of my right jawline, kissing me so slowly, yet with an insane degree of love, like he was making sure I understood just how much he loved this gift, and I couldn’t stop the immediate moan that drifted into this kiss as my hands gripped tighter on his sweater and shirt. His clothes always felt so soft to touch, that now that we were dating and all, I wanted to steal some for myself.

I just- I was trying not to come off too needy. Even if I had made one mess of a love confession.

We could still do slow…

Sorta.

Truth be told I had built up such a fantasy about being with him, I really wanted to be the perfect fantasy for him too. And now both our parents knew, which somehow made this feel so real. Official .

My lips moved against his just as softly, feeling the warmth of him as he warmed the spot under my thighs with his own, my legs gently resting pretty much on top of his as he straddled the metal bench below, and I straddle him.

Once he started to gently push me backwards onto more of the bench behind me, his other hand slipping from the top of my left thigh towards my upper back, I could feel him slowly lowering me back onto this metal bench now, but it was the warmth from his lips that made me fully forget where we even were.

Or perhaps I knew… and I just couldn’t find it in me to give a damn right now , I thought to myself as my back grew flush against the hard material. Dylan had shifted his lower half down a bit harder, pushing against me something that sent straight shivers through the entirety of my body.

Fuck, I could feel him now with how he had bent over even lower, encasing me and making sure that body of his was as flush against mine, and while the temperatures outside this early October were dropping rapidly, it felt like we were making out in the dead of fucking summer. I had gotten so damn hot I almost had to thank mother nature for giving us such a cool autumn day as a backdrop, otherwise I’d be a sweaty mess right now.

It must have been the louder, more explicit moan he had coerced from me that made Dylan sort of come to, and I felt him pull those incredible lips away from mine with the most irritable yet sexiest of groans he could conjure. “I’m sorry, Isiah, I… I… I- didn’t m-mean to-”

I didn’t even let him finish before I lifted myself up a bit and brought my lips to his again, pulling him closer and back over me like he was before.

I had missed him- this

• so fucking much that I didn’t care right now.

Just a little kissing wouldn’t hurt. Kids did that at school all the time. Now what probably wouldn’t be so PG or accepted by staff was if Dylan started to grind that lower half against me more. I guess you could say that luck was on our side there, because I heard the steps of one familiar gal climbing up towards us, I could tell that she probably opting to get a workout in during lunch period because she was a huffing mess.

“ Go away, Molly ,“ Dylan murmured against my lips, refusing to pull away on behalf of our friend. “We’re busy.”

“ Hold on, hold on, I won’t be here long,“ she insisted quickly through deep intakes of breaths. “I just wanted to confirm everything is underway for the weekend!”

“Yes mother ,” I joked, only allowing Dylan to pull away an inch or two. I wasn’t ready to stop kissing him. I mean I never was, but today I was allowing myself to be just a bit more needy.

I had did my best to assure Dylan that the hand-holding and forehead kisses at school was fine, but then I’d catch his slender fingers gently massaging the webs between my fingers, or he’d bring the back of my hand to those gentle lips to kiss it, and just like that, I would be instant mush.

Fuck, and he smelled so goddamn good. Getting a whiff in passing was one thing, but being flooded by its lightness while we laid here like this drove me absolutely crazy. The way he looked at me, even now with Molly just some steps away… It made me all the more excited for camping… if one could even call what we were going to do, camping.

Dylan’s hands were cooling to touch as he tilted my head up further by my jawline, straight analyzing my features at this point. I think he could feel it- how hard my heart was beating. I think he could probably hear it at this point as my breathing got shallower and shallower with every compounding second he looked at me like this.

“Now Molly,” Dylan’s voice was a hell of a lot raspier. “ Scram . I want to kiss and eat lunch with my boyfriend. Just my boyfriend.“

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Molly dismissed us like an old white lady would, waiving her hands our way, but she did eventually take her leave, huffing and puffing all the way back down those steep steps.

“Th-That honestly could have b-been a text,” I mumbled quietly, my voice just riddled with insane nerves. God this guy made me so goddamn nervous at times when he got like this- looked at me like this.

“Yes it absolutely could’ve been,” he whispered back. “But this can’t be. No text would justify any part of the next thirty minutes I get to have with you…. alone .” He put massive emphasis on that last part, just further clarifying just how annoyed he was that such intimate moments between us kept getting interrupted.

And that was the last thing he said before closing that sliver of distance between him and I again, bringing his lips back down to mine quickly.

••

41. Slow Start With The Whittaker-Jones

Alrighty y’all, might be a double upload!

I’m in the process of moving this week and next week. I’m staying with my mum until I can fully recover after the accident because my migraines have gotten worse and I had a seizure a few weeks ago

Hopefully the rest will help me get back to 100%

Enjoy, lovelies!

Don

“C-Cars-” I choked out a sinful, rigid moan, rocking my hips back against the fullness of him- fullness that damn near made the palms I had planted on his chest almost slip beneath the sweat of both his body and my own.

My body was a shivering mess against him as those hands of his gripped my hips tightly, encouraging even more movement as he met my rocking with his thrusts. I could barely peer down at him through my lowered eyelids and lust-driven eyes, feeling that tightness at my core as he was bringing me to yet another fucking orgasm.

“J-Just like that, baby,” Carson grunted, his eyes holding every bit of my gaze with those long since darkened eyes of his own. “Just… just like- like that.” Another deep shiver cut through me, threatening my shaking hands on whether I even still had the strength to hold myself up as I rode him.

“C-Cars-” I breathed out through disastrous, sharp breaths. “C-Carson- you-… you n-need to- to cum s-soon,” I told him with the last bits of seriousness I could muster. Then I felt him thrust up harder, and that forced my head back slightly, feeling the small beads of sweat running down the nape of my neck and down the curve of my back.

“N-Not yet-” the roughness of his voice answered me. “I-Is this- is it too much?”

He had already made me cum countless fucking times, and perhaps I should’ve grown suspicious after the first hour, but we had been at this for almost two, and that was what beckoned my head forward till I could look down at him, noticing my previous loads of cum on his stomach slipping down both sides of his waist onto the damp silk sheets below.

Knowing Carson would never take anything to enhance that already fucking insane sex drive of his, I forced my shambled knees to push me up on this mattress so my gaze could shift lower, and at first, I thought it was his cum causing that shimmer around the base of his cock until I remembered this man hadn’t even fucking came yet.

“Wh-When did-” Carson didn’t let me finish before pulling me back down onto him until he filled me again, grazing up against a spot that forced another almost whimper past my fully swollen, raw lips. I was fighting against it- this next orgasm, and it made me push against his chest harder as I tried to slow his relentless thrusts. “Y-You’re-… you’re w-wearing a fuck- fuck

• a fucking cock ring?“

Carson didn’t even flinch at the pressure I placed on his chest. He just thrust his hips harder against my slowed rocking, making me damn near cry out from this intense feeling. And when this insane man sat himself up abruptly, filling me to the goddamn hilt by the pressure he placed on my hips, I couldn’t even explain the sound I made, feeling his sticky stomach starting to with my own.

Both of our heart rates had reached new heights for us, I could feel his beneath my fingers, with mine really starting to test my old age.

“You-” he choked out, forcing my hips to rock harder against that spot as my hands slid from his chest, up towards his sweaty broad shoulders. My breathing was nothing shy of a mess at this point. “You love it like this, baby-” he all but growled, his face inches away from mine, making sure my gaze remained on nothing else but him.

I knew he could feel me tightening up, reaching that assured fucking peak.

“A-And I-” he inhaled a raspy breath as my hips rocked against his harder, craving more.

I swear my body was moving against my own will at this point, and Carson could feel that. I was unraveling, riding him harder now.

“I can’t-… I can never last long with you on top,” this gorgeous man confessed to me, while those rough, coarse words pushed me to pick my speed up even more.

This… this fucking idiot, he-

“You have… no fucking idea how good you fucking look-… feel … riding me like this.”

Jesus, I lacked all goddamn control with him .

“ C-Cum for me again, baby ,“ he whispered out, falling backwards onto the soft mattress, allowing these hips of mine to take full control again as his cock inside me hit that spot repeatedly. I didn’t even stand a damn chance, keeping my eyes on every bit of those gorgeous eyes as my vision blurred some, allowing another orgasm to rip through every single channel I had, forcing my body to essentially collapse into this man as my arms completely gave out.

Carson’s own arms immediately wrapped around me, but even as I tucked my head breathlessly into the crevice of that sweaty neck of his, I didn’t let up on my line of questioning.

“C-Carson, you-… you don’t h-have to do th-that-” I whispered, feeling the deepest of shivers disperse through his massive build. Between this idiot and I, these last eight years had always been a push and pull between us. Him just wanting to make me feel good, and me not allowing him to just neglect his own pleasure.

It appeared that we were at an impasse yet again.

And that was what had my left hand leaving his shoulder, reaching behind me as I slowly lifted my lower half up, gripping hold of that damn cock ring and pulling it the swollenness of him.

Carson let out the deepest groan into my own neck, biting down on the sensitive skin as he gritted out, “w-wait- D-Don-” but I didn’t even give him the option as I sank him back into me. I could feel his calloused fingertips dragging against my sweaty back as I started to rock against him again, but not a single word escaped him as it took maybe ten seconds of me pushing back against his cock before his entire body tensed.

The hold he had on my body was tight but shaky. His intense moans were followed by him attempting my name as his cum filled whatever damn space was left inside me, spilling out around his thickness and onto him.

“D-D-Don-” he breathed out, slowly releasing the skin he had bit down on.

I had to take a whole moment to collect myself because, against all better judgment, my body was starting to react to him again, and we didn’t have the time for this shit.

“C-Carson, we-… we c-can’t keep going,” I said, meaning to scold him, but it sounded more like a plea if anything. “Dinner tonight-” I whispered, attempting to regain some of my energy. “We… we need to-… to get up-”

“N-No,” Carson still managed to grumble even while breathless himself, tightening his hold around me as our sweat meshed the heat of both our skin. I don’t think my internal nor external temperatures had ever risen to these heights.

He must’ve known just how tired I was because I had half the mind just to lay here in bed with him for another few hours and take a nap…

But I turned my head slightly, away from his neck, to get a glimpse of that digital alarm clock on our bedside table, and I damn near had a heart attack. “Dylan,” I grunted out, forcing my body to pull away from this comfort, however shaky I still was, to which Carson whined while eventually releasing me.

“Why can’t we just cancel dinner?” Carson continued to whine, but I could feel his eyes over every single part of me as I finally got myself out of this bed, and Carson sat himself up more against the headboard. “You, me, Dylan, and Isiah can all make dinner instead and watch a movie. Like old times.”

My eyes pierced sharply at Carson, but that was such a mistake when I saw how hard he was getting again just watching me. He was sprawled out above the silk sheets, with the comforter fully on the floor now. “ Get

up , Carson,“ I insisted, looking away so I wouldn’t fall into this again.

John had rescheduled his arrival here for the final time, landing at 3PM, which would be around the time Dylan and Isiah should be getting here by.

Granted, it was a rare day off for this man-child pulling himself out of bed now, and I, Carson had successfully convinced us to sleep in after morning sex, then I managed to wake up and slip away at around ten this morning to do some more cleaning and make sure our home was completely prepared for more company than we were used to.

Carson, however, got up by 11:30 AM. He joined me in the kitchen, spent the next forty-five minutes seducing me back to bed with his touches and kisses, and by a little past noon, I fucking folded.

Now he and I had about half an hour to shower and get ourselves together in time to look even remotely presentable.

“We’ve got to shower quickly before everyone gets here. I’ll take care of the sheets later,” I was quick to remind him, still keeping time for us as always. My back was to him while I finished pulling on boxers and tried to pick up some of the clothes he had definitely talked and kissed me out of over two hours ago, but when I felt a large arm slip around my sweaty, sticky waist, my overly sensitive body stilled.

Carson nuzzled his nose into the right side of my neck as he whispered, “I’ll get it warm for us,” and that earned him a few swats to that muscular arm of his with my hand.

“Get- get the hell off me, Carson . And we’re not showering together. I’m- I’m not falling for-”

He didn’t even let me finish before he started laying kisses into the crook of my neck again. “I won’t try anything,” he said, lying straight through that perfect set of teeth and soft lips of his. “I promise,” he then added, sensing I didn’t believe a damn word.

And yet… as that arm slid away, his right hand reaching for the clothes in my own hand and tossing them expertly into the hamper in front of me, he somehow managed to convince me yet again, using that persuasive voice. He then stepped away before his right hand soon slid into my left, and he started walking ahead of me, guiding me towards our closed bedroom door.

It was safe to say I should’ve never believed this motherfucker.

We barely made it out of the shower before I got to my phone that was ringing like all hell on the bathroom sink, my body a breathless mess after Carson did many, many, many things with that tongue of his.

His excuse? Aftercare for the relentless amount of sex we had just had. According to him, he was just massaging the spot that was definitely sore after going for so long.

If we hadn’t been working so hard ever since we got back, with barely any time off, I would’ve knocked his head into the showerhead. I didn’t even have that option because he had the front of my body pushed up hard against the stone wall of the shower with him on his knees, pressing his tongue to places that were indeed pretty tender.

Because of the mismanagement of time, he and I just threw on whatever so I could let John and Derek up. I didn’t completely forgive Carson, but I did catch him tossing those soaked sheets into the washer himself, and the edges of my lips couldn’t help but twitch up into a slight smile.

That smile was erased, however, once we heard a knock on the door.

“It’s open!” I called out from the kitchen, watching as the handle turned and the door was pushed open to reveal our guests of honor.

John walked through first like he lived here, with countless grocery totes in his hands, while Derek shuffled in after, holding a large carrier and his motorcycle helmet in his.

“ Home sweet home ,“ John smiled immediately as his gaze caught mine first. “Welcome back, Donny boy.”

“Don’t welcome yourself to my home like that as if you pay rent,” I snapped back at him before shifting my eyes lower past his to the bags in his hand. “And what’s all that? I already told you we bought the stuff we need.”

“Good to see you, Don,” Derek smiled with that distinct lopsided grin of his as he gently set Herold’s carrier down near my desk before placing his helmet on top. As he slipped off his shoes with John doing the same, Derek tried to reach for some bags, but John shook his head at his husband before turning back to me with a large grin.

“Just some extra stuff. Where’s Carson?”

“Here,” Carson replied with far less enthusiasm as he emerged from the corridor. “Just started a load of laundry.” He walked towards the door to first give Derek a firm handshake, because ignoring John was this man-child’s favourite pastime, but he barely turned to our boss before John thrust all those bags into his hands.

“Good to see ya, chap. And those muscles of yours have gotten even larger. I’m sure this is light work for a guy with a build like this.

Carson forced a polite smile, accepting the bags and gesturing for these two to come on in before he brought the cloth bags into the kitchen, setting them on the counter near me.

“Play nice,” I muttered to him, and this handsome man gave me a tight smile. Both our curiosity got the best of us as we started to peek inside and empty the contents John had picked up.

“I’m glad you both took that vacation, but I’m so happy to have you back,” John sighed contentedly. It was the sigh one made when he fully realized he no longer had to hold the fort down with so many work obligations.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” I shot him down quick, but once my eyes caught sight of what John brought, my neck snapped over at the man who was entering the kitchen while Derek got Herold’s carrier settled in the living room.

“I know,” my boss shot out quickly, “your hatred for sweets runs deep, but I think this occasion is worthy of a few treats.”

“ Like hell it is ,“ I snapped back, “Why am I looking at an entire bakery worth of stuff?”

“This shit looks delicious,” Carson mumbled mindlessly under his breath, eyeing the German chocolate cake and sweet macaroon cookies, which earned him a look from me as well.

“Some sugar won’t kill us,” John insisted with that charming smile of his, but it was the gentle kiss Carson leaned over to place on my temple as he whispered, “just for today, yeah?” which ended up eventually somewhat convincing me.

It was the same thing this dickhead said when he convinced me to sleep in this morning.

“So,” John clasped his hands together. “Let’s get started then, yeah? What first?”

I didn’t even get a chance to start putting the man to work, however, before the front door swung open yet again and an all too familiar deep voice rang out.

“Pops! Carson! We’re home!”

As both my tiny giant human and Isiah walked through the door, backpacks slung over their shoulders, the first voice that followed was from none other than Derek, who was now on the floor in the living room next to Herold’s carrier.

His eyes had panned all the way up to my son, his jaw practically dropping to the floor as he got a good look at him and blurted, “holy fucking shit, Dylan… you’re ginormous! “ 

••

My poor baby (my airbag never deployed so I smacked my head into the steering and my arm got smashed up from the force of me recoiling:

My arm today (honestly this scars looking mad permanent which I’m so pissed about but it is MUCH better than right after the accident a few weeks ago. The bruising unfortunately does go down my back but I’ll spare yall that one because my skin actually bubbled up and peeled off):

Thank you all for the well wishes. Once I’m at my mums, I think I’ll be able to breathe again I swear

Love y’all lots! xoxo

42. Ball’s In Their Court

Another chapter as promised!

Also man I gotta update this character name covers lol

I’ll get around to it eventually, I swear

Also this one was longer so I’ll edit in the AM lol

Enjoy!

xoxo

Carson

Dylan chuckled nervously, giving himself a once-over before reaching for Isiah’s backpack as they kicked off their shoes. “Yeah, I guess I sort of did, huh?”

I could already see the excitement on both these kids’ faces as Derek quickly shot up from the living room floor to greet them closer to the door.

“How did you-… how? “ Derek questioned him in utter astonishment, giving Dylan a special handshake that he, Dylan, and Isiah all shared…

But Don was quick to cut in with “spinach.”

I swear to god I was so in love with this man. Every single blunt part about him.

And the straight horror Derek’s face contorted into made just about everyone in this home chuckle, because we all knew spinach was probably Derek’s final boss.

“Probably a combination of spinach and genetics,” Dylan tried to answer more honestly to the shorter guy. “But I mean, you look like you’ve grown a bit, too, man,” this kind, sweet child of ours added out of the goodness of his heart.

“What did I say about lying?” Don asked his son as he looked up from the clear glass bowls he was now placing on the kitchen island. I had to hold in the literal snort that almost fell past my lips when Derek looked over briefly at my husband, pouting, but it would seem Derek’s attention then shifted back from Dylan to Isiah because his next choice of words had me genuinely smiling.

“Now that’s what I call a cut, Isiah!” He beamed, doing that special handshake with the shorter guy, and I could see that comfort wash over the kid as soon as Derek complimented that new haircut, which made me feel really good. It felt like the last few times Isiah had been here since we got back from Ireland had just been a complete fucking mess. As much as I wanted this to just be a family meal with Isiah, I knew the kids would also appreciate a visit from the Terrys.

For Don and I, we saw them all the time with work. It was different for Isiah and Dylan.

Dylan offered to take Isiah’s jacket once he slipped it off and set their book bags by Don’s desk, which earned Isiah a few more comments from Derek’s energetic self.

“And tattoos? Isiah!” Derek gushed, making Isiah grin.

“Tattoos?” John questioned, leaning a bit forward over the kitchen island to check it out for himself.

Sure enough, Isiah had removed that leather jacket to reveal a shorter-sleeved button-down. It looked like both kids had worn their church’s best in honor of their presentation today, and that just made my steady smile grow. I could feel what Don had now- how well Dylan and Isiah were always when together.

Blubbering, stumbling, adolescent teens still figuring this out?

Yes. Absolutely yes. Like terribly so.

But after the hell we went through with moody Dylan, I think Don and I were much more equipped to handle that innocence around a first love thing than the anguish around a close friendship lost.

We’d talked about it last night, however, Don and I, and we agreed that we wouldn’t say anything to anyone about this budding romance unless they did. Not tonight, or any night. Ball was in their court right now on when they felt ready to come out officially, but I could sense it was coming.

“Wicked, right?” Dylan asked Derek as Isiah proudly extended his arm for Derek to examine. “They’re so goddamn beautiful against his perfect, tinted skin.”

That quickly made every head in this home snap up to the tall kid… Don’s, my own, and John, who stood beside Don on the farthest right of me. And that was one thing I had started to make a habit of. Being on Don’s left whenever possible. I liked him being able to touch me with ease, even though he was skilled with both hands. Very, very skilled.

Derek just looked back and forth between Dylan and Isiah a bit questionably, but for perhaps the first time in his entire life, he didn’t say what his mind was thinking. It was actually Dylan clearing his throat that interrupted the sudden silence. “I-I mean-”

“I-I did a… a lot of work outside this s-summer,” Isiah attempted to correct Dylan, his face reddening by the second, and I swear I could feel Don itching to bring his fingertips to the bridge of that slender nose of his.

“Enough about that, though,” Dylan tried for a quick save… but his voice cracked in the middle of it, and I had to stifle a chuckle.

These kids were fucking hopeless.

“W-Whatchya got for us, man?” Dylan asked Derek.

“Yeah, don’t hold out on us, we’ve been waiting for forever on that new issue!” Isiah added. A quick change in topics seemed to do this whole rather open awkwardness a whole lot of good. Don and I had returned to our work at our station, already knowing exactly what we had heard and seen, and John did the same, but I knew he had picked up on those two already.

“See, about that,” Derek chuckled a bit nervously, making me glance up curiously again. “There were some… delays … but I’m actually meeting with Onyx later this evening to go over finishing touches. I, um… I kinda got in my head about it all, but John-” Derek paused for a second, looking back at his husband just as John glanced up himself to meet his gaze.

John didn’t waste any time explaining himself. Well, sort of. “My husband and I… discussed it this morning. Worked the… worked the kinks out. I’m positive he won’t be talking down about his talents like that anytime soon.”

It was the way Derek’s face slightly flushed that let me know exactly what was coming next.

Don leant over slightly to John and whispered, “Mention anything about your sexual deviancy around my child, and I will stab you straight through both of your eyes with the curved end of a goddamn spoon, carving them out to serve to you like Swedish meatballs.” 

John was still just bold enough to whisper, “Are you threatening me with saving me money on blindfolds?” But he took a massive step to the side once Don’s right hand slightly flinched, raising his hands up quick to surrender and keep the peace.

Both kids gave John a thumbs-up, which he simply laughed at, gave them a thumbs up in return, then returned to his station, his eyes slightly weary on Don and the knife he was still wielding in that right hand.

“Did you and John come here separately then?” Isiah asked, walking into the living room while Dylan took long strides to the kitchen to greet myself and Don.

I let the kid tussle my hair a bit as he gave me and Don a “Hey Carson, hey Pops” with a smile I quickly mirrored.

“Hey kid,” I replied, but made sure I didn’t let my clean hands touch anything but the vegetables I was cutting. He then leant his head closer to his Pops so Don could give him a quick kiss on his forehead, still covered somewhat by that longer, shaggy dark hair.

John looked like he was about to remove his hands from his own set of vegetables to pull Dylan in for a hug, but he quickly caught himself and they just bumped wrists instead.

“Good to see ya, Uncle John.”

“Glad to have you back, kiddo,” John replied, grinning while he returned to his duties.

“Yeah, John took his car while I rode my bike since we brought Herold,” Derek explained to the kids.

“Is that sick new bike in the parking lot yours then?” Dylan asked, absolutely stoked about this sudden revelation.

“The Ducati, right?” Isiah asked, grinning with just as much enthusiasm. These boys were already bouncing off the walls, but they matched Derek’s excitement perfectly.

It was the “ ouch “ I heard murmur from near me that made me look over at Don and John. Don was just returning his right hand to the knife he had set down, while John was rubbing his own left hand.

“ A fucking Ducati? “ Don’s sharp voice cut through quietly to our boss.

“Not from me!” John shot back equally quietly, trying to rush to his own defense. “That did not warrant a pinch, you grouch . It’s a gift from Olaf, he chipped in a little, so take it up with that old man.”

Don’s eyes peered over at John like a father scolding a child. “ I absolutely will ,“ he assured him with every bit of seriousness, and John threw his hands up slightly in defense yet again. My beautiful husband ran the tightest of ships, and that was why he did all the finances and I made sure I took care of everything else I could.

While it gave me damn butterflies in my stomach to make this man’s life as easy as I could, nothing could describe how I felt about how he noticed everything . His love language was unique, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

“How was school?” My gorgeous husband then asked Dylan, changing the subject before the kid could beeline it straight to Isiah and Derek. I already knew Dylan was done with us older guys and our bickering, wanting to delve straight into the nerdier stuff with Isiah and Derek, and check out how Herold was doing.

“I’m taking it y’all kicked ass on that project?” I added, giving Dylan another grin. As soon as I said that, he was literally beaming ear to ear.

“Oh, we aced it for sure! And you guys would never guess what Isiah made in welding for us!” Both Don and I raised our eyebrows slightly. I didn’t know Isiah was taking a full welding credit this year, but that made me genuinely happy. The kid was smart in all aspects. Brainy but good with his hands. He used to like hearing about the work I was doing on my old truck, and I was already thinking of asking Sheila if she’d be alright with us taking him down to Texas this year for Thanksgiving.

I knew she was big on the family stuff, and I would offer they all go, but her and Nick had to work, with Sheila usually working the night of Thanksgiving so she got Christmas off each year.

“Well, go on then, the suspense is killing me,” Don spoke with a smile. “Go grab the art and the artist.”

Dylan grinned, not wasting a single moment dashing to his backpack to grab something wrapped thick in newspaper, before heading to Isiah and extending his hand, dragging the poor, shy child towards the kitchen island for them both to sit down across from us at. Derek also joined us at the end of the island near John after making sure Herold was still doing okay in his carrier.

We all watched on, curious, while Dylan rather gently unwrapped the statue, and I could see from Isiah sitting pretty much across from me that he was a bit nervous.

The kid always got this way about what he was working on, or worked on. Over the years, he worked up the courage to ask me for a few tools to borrow, always making sure to bring them back long before he said he would. At some point, I just told him to keep them since he was punctual anyways, and I didn’t mind buying more, but I forced him to at least show me some of his projects.

He was great with wood carving and ceramic shaving. He even sanded down these cool wooden balls to make one of those fun man-looking toys that could be bent around, and Dylan still had it in his room to this day, perched up on his dresser where he kept all his prized possessions.

What Dylan soon unwrapped, however, made me set down all my food-prep stuff to simply gawk at. “ Are you fucking kidding me , Isiah?“ I asked, turning to the shy kid in clear surprise at this brass piece. “Man, that’s insane! “

“Seriously, oh my god,” John spoke, more in bewilderment than anything. He didn’t really know the full extent of Isiah’s skill like I did, so he was just staring at its greatness.

What got me the most, though, was Don’s response. He beckoned his son to hold up the sculpture closer, with Don’s beautiful eyes analyzing every detail as Dylan slowly turned it for him in his careful hands, before Don’s gaze shifted to Isiah.

“Well done,” he smiled, saying those two seemingly simple words with the same tenderness he spoke to Dylan with. Isiah nodded, now gaining much more confidence than he had before. A compliment from Don was truly anyone’s greatest achievement, because while he didn’t fancy making art like this, he had a refined taste for it.

“Isiah is seriously absolutely amazing , isn’t he? He’s so freaking skilled, it’s unreal. I can’t wait to see what lucky college earns him,” Dylan gushed, turning to the shorter guy as the faintest blush crossed his cheeks, and the way that face of Isiah’s turned the deepest shade of crimson just made Don and I knowingly smile.

These two, I swear.

“Can I-” Derek started, about to reach for the statue Dylan was still holding up, but Don was quicker with his words.

“Absolutely not. You’ve broken enough statues in your day, wouldn’t you say? Put those cursed hands down.”

Derek pouted, and John looked like he was going to say something, but Don muttered to him, “Jail, remember? “ and that shut both the Terrys up immediately. Let’s just say Don had cleaned up a lot of their messes that he was absolutely being the rational one right now.

“I promise, Mr. Whittaker-Jones, I made it pretty indestructible,” Isiah chuckled, but Dylan still set it down on the counter safely before pushing it over for Derek to examine. Leveled ground was probably best for Don’s heart.

“Isiah, you did your fucking big one with this.” Derek smiled instantly, making sure he did everything in his power not to even breathe on it incorrectly as he turned it around on the table. “If I hire you to create something like this for one of my characters, do you think you could do it? We’ve got an expo we’re preparing for.”

Isiah’s eyes lit up. “Man, I’d do it free of charge!”

“ Charge him ,“ Don told this young kid with a swiftness. “If he’s got the money for a Ducati, he’s got the money to invest in you. What you created was earned by the work you put in. Price yourself accordingly, kiddo.”

“Don’s right,” Derek added quickly, not taking any offense to my husband’s more financial approach. “I want to invest in your work! And I’ll throw in some pre-releases for something new I got cookin if you can get it done before fall of next year.”

“Seriously?!” Both boys asked, gleaming at that, and Derek’s nod was swift as he grinned with just as much excitement.

“I’ll send you the concept work once we’ve got it finalized at Onyx!” Then the man gently pushed the statue back to Dylan so he could pick it up and wrap it in the newspaper once again.

“Oh you don’t have to wrap it, Dylan. I thought we’d keep it at yours,” Isiah said, which made Dylan turn to him.

“N-No no, you- y-you deserve to have it at yours-” Dylan tried to start, but Isiah shook his head.

“I- I like how you display our stuff… and the stuff I… I- uh, give to you,” Isiah replied, both these kids now a shy, adorable mess.

“A-Are you-” Dylan started, only for Isiah to nod, neither one of them looking away from each other for what felt like the longest moment in silence. They got so smitten, Don had to clear his throat to bring these two lovebirds back to earth.

“Why don’t you two kids go find a spot for it in Dylan’s room before coming to help out? I need all hands on deck in here,” Don suggested, watching as these two glowing adolescents nodded slowly, before hopping off the kitchen island’s bar stools. 

“Baby?” John asked, turning to Derek. “You can let Herold out, but do you mind staying with him in the living room if you do? I fear he won’t make it past those front doors ever again if he gets into anything with the mood Don’s in.”

Derek glanced at Don, who, without even looking up from continuing to chop vegetables, simply said, “his coat is perfect for a living room rug actually. Goes with the white furniture.” And that had Derek moving quickly.

“So,” John started while Don and I kneaded out the ready-made dough. “Isiah and Dylan, huh? When did that start?” John was busy pouring himself a glass of whiskey, while we waited… and waited… and waited for those two kids to finally emerge from Dylan’s room. I’d bet anything we had at least ten to twenty more minutes of waiting, give or take.

Especially after the whole sculpture thing.

“That’s a question for my kid,” Don replied, nodding when John switched out the whiskey bottle in his hand for a bottle of wine from Don’s selection, and held it out for him to approve. “He’s an adult after all, something he likes to remind me of every single minute of every day. Who am I to not honor that?”

John simply chuckled. “Carson?” he then asked, and I was about to reply the same, potentially snapping at him for insinuating my answer would be any different from Don’s… until I glanced over and John was just pointing to the wine bottle, wondering if he should grab another glass.

“Oh. Yeah, I’ll take what my husband’s having,” I replied instead.

He set both glasses in front of us each, before turning to grab a wine opener.

“You know,” he then continued, “I’m having some deja vu here. They sort of remind me of a dinner we once had together years ago.”

That made both myself and Don turn to our right, glancing at John whose back was facing us. It took our boss a couple seconds to get the bottle open before he turned from the kitchen counters to the kitchen island and made his way over with the bottle and glasses.

He started pouring for Don, filling the glass maybe halfway, but when he went to straighten the bottle, Don gestured to him to continue, which had the man pouring till it was good and full.

“They’re cute, though,” John insisted. “Two skilled, intelligent kids. They definitely have Uncle John’s blessing.”

Once John maneuvered around Don to get to me, I couldn’t help but ask as he started to pour, “As I recall, don’t you wait four score and seven years to give out that blessing?” And once again, my boss and I just looked at each other for a good, long moment.

He did finally break our gaze to pour my glass around the same level as Don’s, then capped the wine with the cork and placed it on the counter between Don and I. “Are they breaking any policies?” He questioned me suddenly.

“Play nice, you two.” Don butted in before I could jeopardize my whole ass job with a comeback to that. “And John? Say anything about them when they get back and I’ll tighten that budget of yours. Derek has his birthday coming up in a few months, doesn’t he?”

John fell silent with a swiftness, accepting the quick defeat on that one before returning to his own station. I could tell now that these two had definitely had words over John’s expenses, especially because he had hired Don on to manage Derek’s years ago before they had officially tied the knot, and John refused on a prenup.

A hell I don’t think I could wish on my own worst enemy, let alone my husband.

What John didn’t know was that Don had already been slashing prices on the trip to Japan John was planning for Derek’s birthday. And I only knew that because I was planning something special for Don’s birthday, which would follow soon after, after seeing the many, many tabs he had left open on my laptop about negotiating prices for their hotel stays while still finding something perfect for them.

Don had once told me on a drive home from our first (though it was really like our third) I guess official date, that he had wanted to see the northern lights for himself in Alaska, regardless of his hatred for the cold, but he couldn’t do a cruise with whale watching because of his sea sickness…

And after the vow made the night of my proposal to him on that train- to experience everything on that list of his… I knew I had to make it happen one way or another.

I had shown him the city lights of Astoria then… it was finally time I showed him the light of an aurora.

••

43. Sweater Weather

Hi lovelies!

Thank you all for the well wishes on the last chapter, I appreciate you guys so much!

I’m going to try and get some updates for TSOE tonight since I have a few chapters written but not edited (this week was a busy one) but I’m getting back into a rhythm now I think

Enjoy!

xoxo

Isiah

“So I’m thinking here,” Dylan spoke, shifting the statue slightly to the left in a free spot. It was right next to his 1st place trophy for chess club from seventh grade.

At this point, he was running out of good real estate up here with some of these larger awards, yet I couldn’t help but smile when I saw a few of my own creations up here, including the wooden figure doll of a man I had carved to help him through an art class eons ago.

Dylan still played chess, of course- especially with both his dads and Carson’s gramps whenever he went down to Texas- but not really competitively anymore. He preferred the leisure fun of playing, and I didn’t really blame him for it.

We just kept taking harder and harder classes after 6th grade, wanting to see just how far we could push ourselves, since middle school meant we were eligible for honors classes and even placement in some high school classes taught at our middle school.

Safe to say we overachieved far too fucking close to the sun, with every year just getting harder and harder. Ugh, and now we had damn Zinfel again .

“What do you think, Isiah?” Dylan asked, pulling me from my thoughts as he turned his head in my direction and tilted that sharp chin of his lower to meet my gaze. I had long since accepted the fact that while I might never get over his height, it was making me plain goop whenever he glanced down at me like this, knees and joints be damned.

“Oh- yeah,” I nodded quickly, just forcing myself to focus again, “I think that’s great, but you-… I mean, you don’t have too much room left up here. We could always move it to your smaller bookshe-”

“Absolutely the hell not,” this taller guy replied even quicker, making my face heat up all the fuck over again, and completely ruining whatever chances I had at still sounding somewhat held together.

I had already done my best not to act like a stammering fool right from when he and I walked through that front door to this penthouse, not even a smooth thirty minutes ago, but now, with us alone again, I was just replaying everything Dylan had said in the past thirty minutes that had me acting ridiculously smitten to begin with.

What he had said about my tattoos…

I mean, I didn’t doubt for a second that Derek wouldn’t even bat an eyelash as soon as he saw them. And what he had said about my haircut, too, really made me feel a lot more comfortable about showing him and John this new look. It was such a weird as shit feeling to begin with- the only time I was ever nervous about how much I changed my appearance was when I was around Dylan and the people he and I cared about.

Up until he got back, I didn’t give a rat’s ass who had judged my spontaneous decisions for junior year… but now I really cared when I was over here. Like a lot. And I cared even more since Dylan and I had finally talked about and confirmed that we were, like, officially telling people about us. I cared about what everyone in that living room just past this corridor felt about all that.

The only thing going for me was that at least I knew that Dylan and I being the same sex wouldn’t be an issue for anyone out there. That was at least something, right?

And even if I looked different on the outside, I wanted to make sure they all knew I was still the same old Isiah. Well, now I was, now that Dylan was back.

That’s probably why I liked Derek so much. He didn’t even hesitate to initiate his, mine, and Dylan’s secret handshake… and he complimented my look with zero questions on the docket. It’s always been just good vibes with him, even if he did force Dylan and me to sometimes explain some concepts that were genuinely hard for him to grasp, like the finite limitations of the speed of light and why we see the past when we look up at a night sky.

This was a topic Dylan and I could talk about for literal days nonstop. The deception of light, and the view of the past that was our present moment. Derek, however, stared at us like we had broken his brain when we got really into the specifics…

So we kept most conversations on something we all could chat each other’s ears clean off about. Video games and comics.

“ Isiah ,“ Dylan spoke a little lower now. I hadn’t realized how in my head I was getting again. It felt like I was full-on living in here some days ever since he got back. Every time I gave him my full attention, however, I- I always… “Every single thing you make for me gets top shelf. Every. Single. One. Non-negotiable .”

…Those words alone had my heart fucking running sprints .

“Chess stuff gets moved over to the bookshelf if I have to, because it’s on a much lower tier for importance if there isn’t room. Got that?”

…See, then he went ahead and said shit like this that just-

I shifted my gaze slightly back to the top shelf of the dresser, not sure where the hell I was supposed to look to try and hide some of this shameful blush just spreading across my whole face.

All I could fucking do was nod. I mean, like, at this point, if I tried to say anything, I was going to trip over every syllable of every single word, and between Dylan and me, we had already stumbled through a whole lot of words out there the last thirty minutes.

This handsome guy was quick to finish situating the statue safely on the top shelf. What I wasn’t expecting, however, was for that right hand to not fall to his side but instead wrap itself around my waist before I was being tugged directly in front of Dylan and turned towards him, my back now resting against the flat drawers of the tall dresser.

It was so tall, I could just about feel the back of my head touching the top shelf, while Dylan practically trapped me in this position with his massive frame. His right arm held me by my whole waist, pulling my lower half into him, while his left hand reached up to tilt my chin up towards him.

Could a heart beat have a seizure? Cause it felt like mine was undergoing some new medical abnormality as I tried to wrap my head around what he was doing now.

“D-Dylan-” I pretty much stammered out in an almost whisper. I hadn’t expected this at all. In fact, I was still wondering whether there was something I said- or didn’t say- when I was overthinking everything that made Dylan pull me directly in front of him like this.

This fucking celestial-looking guy only confirmed it when he asked me in an equally hushed tone, “W-What’s wrong, Isiah?”

He was so fucking close again, I could already feel my body reacting far before my mind could, as both my hands went out to his chest, holding that sweater material of his tighter but keeping his chest a safe distance away. His scent was everywhere, and I was very, very quickly forgetting that, well, 1. The door to Dylan’s bedroom was still wide open, and 2. We were only supposed to be finding a spot for this sculpture in the first place before helping out in the kitchen.

“N-Nothing,” I tried to squeak out past the nerves ravaging my whole body from our proximity. I wasn’t even sure when my breaths started quickening, but they did. I was now damn near in the fight of my life, trying to focus on something else. Anything else, so help me god.

And yes, those eyes of his weren’t letting up on mine. That large hand of his was holding my chin firmly, not allowing me to turn my head as his face drew nearer, like another inch or so, and that right arm of his tightened around my slender waist even harder.

Shit.

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit-

How the flying fuck was I even supposed to form sentences when him holding half of me against him like this felt so unbelievable I was starting to forget all about dinner and that open bedroom door. Oh, and like the four people and a furball waiting on us.

At this point, I wanted him to maybe throw just a tiny bit of caution to the wind and back us up to his bed. I wanted to feel a bit more of him against me, and even though I could hear it- his own heavier breaths, the concern in his light eyes genuinely never left. They were honestly what was grounding me to this conversation otherwise I would’ve gotten lost in those eyes forever ago.

“Did you-… do you not like it on the top shelf? I… I mean, Isiah- like this is fucking incredible . You’re fucking incredible, and I- I want that to be the first thing anyone sees when they look at my display. All the insanely

beautiful and cool things you’ve made for me. The medals are whatever.“

Well… shit.

Shit .

All that did was make breathing correctly a fading thing of the past for me.

It wasn’t that I didn’t want him to display what I gave him like this. It wasn’t like that at all.

It was just…

“I-It’s not that,” I tried to rush out, realizing I was doing it again. Overthinking. Dylan’s gaze was cutting straight through mine as he damn near must’ve seen the nerve endings shooting through communication channels in my brain, trying to tell me to articulate what I was actually thinking without sounding crazy.

And that was so much easier said than done, because when I finally landed on what I really wanted to say, my brain told me to keep my fucking mouth shut by any means necessary.

I had already said far too many embarrassing things since we started dating. Hell, definitely before even that. There had to be an award for how brain-dead I became when I was around him.

But the feeling of Dylan’s cool-to-touch fingers gently releasing my chin only to glide against the edge of my jawline, made me close my eyes a moment.

I was now starting to understand how the hell I kept saying stupid shit in front of him. As soon as he touched me, common sense liked to pack up her shit in record timing and book it the hell outta my body, leaving me to my own devices when I knew for a fact I needed her as a babysitter.

“I…” I started, deciding we were just going to keep our eyes shut for a bit as Dylan started to smooth his fingers over my jawline, moving the full length of my right side slowly. “I-It’s going to… It’s stupid-” I tried to dismiss it almost immediately, but Dylan pulled my body as flush as it would go against the front of him. I could feel him drawing nearer, but once his lips brushed against the crevice of my ear, a deep shiver ripped through me.

“ N-Nothing you say can ever be stupid ,“ he murmured against me, pretty much holding my whole body up at this point because my legs had long since turned to jello. I didn’t even know how hard I was gripping the material of his sweater anymore, but I tried not to pull on it. I didn’t want to ruin the soft fabric. “I… I want to hear it, Isiah .”

Jesus fucking Christ, so help me god

his deep breaths fanning my fucking ear …

I couldn’t stop the lightest moan from slipping past my lips, even though I knew I was supposed to be saying words instead and falling even deeper into this tempting feeling. I was hoping it was faint enough that Dylan would just overlook it, but when I felt something slowly growing harder, pressing further against my stomach, I knew he had for sure heard me.

And that just made my body feel like I was being dipped in molten lava. Like my face had been shot with straight steam from a hot spring, burning my skin up like crazy.

I was honestly thankful for our height difference at first, until I felt it- his right leg pushing past the small space between both of mine, brushing his thigh up against a part that, without any warning, made me fucking whimper .

As if this whole situation wasn’t embarrassing enough.

Dylan slowly pulled his head away from my ear, forcing my eyes gradually open again as he whispered down to me, “ Please , Isiah. Talk to me .“

And that was pretty much it. That was all it literally took for me to start the ceremonious butchering of words.

“I-I-I-… I… I like it- h-how you like… You have everything I’ve made. I-I-… I… I, like- so like I’m not saying you don’t like, you don’t gift me anything- the necklace you gave me- th-the cross- it’s on my night stand, a-and like I-…”

I took the weakest of breaths, trying to stabilize literally any part of this mess. I knew I was breathing in oxygen, but I swear none of it was making it to my brain.

“I’m scared to… to damage it, so I don’t wear it a lot, I just like it near me when I wake up, rub it for good luck and all that cheesy shit.” That part was true. Embarrassing, yes, but still true. “B-But I’d like-… like something else of yours. L-Like something I can like maybe, like-”

My eye contact went to complete shit directly after those words left my lips, and I just full-on closed my eyes again before saying my final mess of thoughts.

“Like… wear . Something that like… reminds me of you.” I couldn’t even tell how the fuck Dylan was reacting internally because externally the man hadn’t moved a damn inch. His fingers simply stilled on my jawline. “B-But that- that’s also like really fucking stupid because we’ve only been dating for a few weeks and I see you every weekday at school anyways so it doesn’t even make sense to be that cling-”

My absolutely abysmal ramblings were cut short by the feeling of Dylan all-out pinning me back against this dresser by my upper back and shoulders, pressing his body completely into me before his soft lips quickly found mine.

At first I was stunned as all hell with a surprise kiss being probably the last thing on my mind during this nervous rambling I had started doing, but my body must’ve refused to allow us to go through any more embarrassment, and I reacted to this escalating kiss like a nanosecond later.

The groan Dylan released, holding me even tighter as my hands finally tugged on his sweater to pull him as humanly close to me as physically possible… that shit had me a mess , practically begging him for more when I felt him scrape his teeth against my bottom lip. The last time he had touched me was on the bleachers, but this was vastly different. This kiss was needy, and perfectly embodied just how long it always felt between moments when we were actually alone.

The only thing that took me aback was when he pulled away ever so slightly, forcing my eyes open again as I breathed out a shaky breath I was holding in. And that was such a misstep on my end, because the way Dylan was looking down at me forced his arm to strengthen around my waist before my legs caved in at the kneecaps.

Dylan was looking at me like we were one trillion percent not making it past this room for the rest of the night. Maybe week. Maybe fucking year, I didn’t fucking know anymore. All I did know was that no words were going to be formed on my end if he kept up the sheer intensity of that look in his eyes.

And I knew he could feel it now, too- the shivers running up and down my body relentlessly, without a damn care in the world for acting even remotely nonchalant. He could clear as day feel how hard I was with his thigh pressed up this firmly against me. After a kiss like that, I felt the dampness of my briefs which just brought on new waves of clear embarrassment. I didn’t have any control left to show for myself when he did shit like this.

Regardless of how many times I jerked off, nothing could win over how it felt when Dylan touched me. How he kissed me. That almost infuriatingly perfect deep voice of his. He had me slowly pushing myself up onto the balls of my feet, wanting his lips on mine again stat , but Dylan kept me right where I was, with his large hand now gliding past my jaw to the length of my neck, only further holding me back in place.

“Y-You-” he started; however, that fucking voice of his told on him immediately. It was far past just rugged and coarse. “You want t-to… to wear something of mine? “

I mean… when he said it like that…

…When he said anything like that, for that matter…

I found myself nodding, not trusting whatever gibberish would fall past my lips if I opened my mouth now.

Dylan quickly detached himself from me, throwing me off yet again, and I swear to god my wobbly legs were doing their absolute best to keep me from toppling over as he straight beelined it to his closet and started rifling through the walk-in with speeds I could barely register. I mean, this handsome man was on a goddamn mission all of a sudden.

I had meant to recommend something older, whatever he didn’t mind parting with because he probably wouldn’t miss something he couldn’t fit, and I’d probably fit those clothes way better anyway, but when he pulled out a mocha colored thick hooded sweater with the word Galway printed across it in bold white font, I could only watch as he slipped it off the plastic hanger quickly.

“D-Dylan,” I stammered, staring at the massive hoodie. “Th-That- that’s- like that’s way too big.”

Dylan’s lips tugged up into a large smile as he first headed over towards the door of his bedroom and carefully closed it, trying to be as quiet as possible, before he turned and took a few large steps back to where I was standing. I was still leaning back against the dresser in the fight of my life to hold myself up.

“I know,” he replied with the same clear roughness in his voice. “I… I want to see you in my, uhm… my like-… my current clothes…”

Oh, so a gown , I couldn’t help but think as I stared at the massive sweatshirt. At this point, I was going to need a walker for these unstable legs, given the way this guy sounded- the way he was looking at me as those eyes darkened.

“W-With like-… the sleeves rolled up a little… with…” his mesmerizing eyes finally fell from mine to take in the full, definitely shorter length of my body. “With just this on, and-… and… nothing else.”

My shaky hand was already reaching out to grab that hoodie, even if my face felt like I had hot coals placed all over it from what he was envisioning, but Dylan stretched the sweater out of my reach and tossed it towards the left side of his bed, away from both of us.

“But first I…” his hands then reached forward for my shorter-sleeved button-down shirt, those long fingers of his quickly undoing the buttons. “F-First, I get to get you out of this shirt, right?” He murmured to me as those perfect eyes shifted up to meet mine again.

And that about did it.

That about sealed our fate for at least the next twenty or so minutes as he slowly dipped his head lower and brought those soft lips of his to mine again. Making sure I felt every single bit of what he thought about my request when those hands of his slid up my bare stomach.

••

44. My Man, My Man, My Man

My baby, my baby:)

Alright so updates:

I finally moved, settled, and am on my first week at my new work from home job

It’s been a hell of a last few months but I finally feel like I can just breathe and write

Shooting for 60 chapters with this one… but man do we have a whole ride ahead of us

Y’all will get 3 epilogue chapters after wrapping this up initially around their Halloween night: Christmas, Don’s bday (Don and Carson exclusive with recaps from their wedding day), and graduation day for the boys :)

Enjoy!

xoxo

Dylan

It would be a lie if I said that I raced home for this dinner.

After meeting Isiah at my locker right as the last bell rang so I could walk us to the parking lot, I was so goddamn deprived of him that I milked the complete hell out of that drive, just wanting a little more time alone with him.

Now don’t get me wrong, I was excited to see my mum, John, Derek, and of course Herold… but what I also really wanted was more alone time with Isiah.

Lunch on the bleachers with him was short. Wayyy

too fucking short. I mean it felt like I blinked and we were being hit with the warning bell for the next class period, which just irritated the hell out of me.

But alas, we did eventually end up making it to my home, the slow drive filled with talk of plans about getting our Halloween Costumes on Sunday after we got back from this “camping” trip. At this point, it was just a weekend at a cabin, regardless of what Molly insisted.

As I pulled us into the outdoor lot of the Alpines, Isiah was the one to spot a brand new Ducati parked in one of the visitor parking slots near the front, and once I glanced over while slowly driving towards the underground entrance, I noticed it was parked next to John’s car.

John usually parked in the underground visitor parking, so I was a bit confused as to why his SUV was out here instead, but I just rolled with it. Seeing that he had already made it here, though, did put a bit of pep in our step as Isiah and I booked it inside the high-rise after I parked, then dashed up to the penthouse floor.

I knew for certain we were good for time, yet I still somehow grew anxious that my old man was going to think I was running late if the rest of our guests were already here. I didn’t need him getting any ideas, even though those ideas were warranted.

Isiah had his hand in mine from the underground parking to the elevators to the penthouse floor, but I felt him slowly slip his hand out of mine once we walked towards the front door. We had both agreed that we would sort of ease John and Derek into this one, and the anxiousness on Isiah’s face while I brought the fob to the door keypad said it all.

I knew the fact that his changed look had him nervous, but I also knew John and Derek so well that Derek wouldn’t give a shit, and John never commented on either Isiah or me about the choices we made. I think that was mostly because the only parenting he really ever wanted to do was parent his and Derek’s little furball.

Not saying Uncle John wouldn’t be a fit parent to an actual human… but he and Derek were definitely meant to be the fun uncles for sure. And they fulfilled that role for me and Isiah perfectly.

John would probably step up if he had to, like my dad did eight years ago with me, but Derek… Derek was someone who probably needed a trusted adult of his own at times, however fun of a dad he would be.

Isiah and I still loved that funny little guy though. Loved him hard. I couldn’t wait to bombard him with questions on his next work.

What I didn’t really expect about this afternoon but should’ve was the complete mess I was with trying to get through introductions once Isiah and I finally walked through that front door to greet everyone.

I was a hot mess. Like a whole, profound mess . And as I watched Isiah’s confidence grow bit by bit with every compliment that fell past Derek’s lips at my boyfriend’s new look, I became more and more of a drastic mess, just stumbling over words after letting mindless comments slip about how beautiful Isiah was. I couldn’t even remember the last time I heard my voice crack like that since hitting puberty at age like 14.

Then I got the opportunity to show off to everyone what Isiah had made for us since we 100% aced our science project, and that just made me gush even more over him. The verdict was still out about our grade, but Isiah and I had never scored anything less than a perfect score when it came to anything science related, and we sure as fuck weren’t about to start now.

That was probably why Zinfel hated our asses so much. Our ability to lock in was undeniably unmatched, which meant we often times weren’t on the receiving end of his I’m disappointed in you lectures like the rest of our class always was.

It took nothing for me to boast about Isiah’s skills to pretty much anyone I ran into at any given time of day, but a visit from Derek and John was pretty rare as is with their hectic schedules. They didn’t get to see for themselves just how amazing this handsome guy was in every aspect of what he did like I did. And they deserved to know that it went so far beyond just being intelligent as fuck.

Honestly, he made me so jealous how good he was with his hands, but that was only because I wished I could make incredible things for him too. I had kept everything he had given me, everything he had made for me over the years. Even his flashcards for our economics class that we had already passed years ago in middle school. I kept those because all the words had the most hilarious fucking hints on the front, like for example:

Price Ceiling ( think Raise The Roof (woop woop), but you won’t have a roof over your head, nor  a house to call home if this gets raised ) 

Genuinely, this beautiful soul carried me through that class with the like 200 flash cards he created, and there wasn’t a word to describe how much I absolutely adored him for that.

Between my good ol’ Pops, Carson, and John, the kitchen was already being worked at what I thought was full capacity, but my dad suggested Isiah and I find a spot for the statue in my bedroom, then come help out after. I think he really just wanted me and my boyfriend to be a buffer between Carson and John, because all these years later and my dad’s attention was still being fought over by those two.

Nothing romantic on John’s part of course, he was very happily married thanks to my dad who was able to work out a lot of Derek’s chaotic financial decisions before approving of said legal binding contract without a prenup in sight…

I just think John saw how many more responsibilities had entered my dad’s life over the last eight years and knew my dad would have to start pulling back a bit eventually with Terry Enterprises.

Between being a fully devoted dad who was (barely) coming to terms with his kid fucking off to college soon, managing his reviews as an even more well-known food critic, remodeling the Alpines, and completing full renovations on the new apartment building with his doting but inexperienced husband… it was a lot.

It was also my understanding that the year we had just spent in Ireland was probably the most time my dad had ever taken off work, and my sweet Uncle John was treating it like he had left for war.

There was probably more that my old man was managing, but he liked to withhold certain things until he felt that it was the right time to share them…

Like Hob getting really sick just a month before my dad and Carson’s wedding…

My dad held off on disclosing the severity of it until after the wedding to keep everyone’s spirits high, then made sure we spent as much time as we could with Hob before he passed peacefully in his sleep about seven months later at the graceful age of 90.

That one hit my old man really hard, even if he hid it well from others.

The wedding was pretty soon after Carson finally popped the question and we took our family trip to Ireland for Carson’s 30th birthday- compliments of Antoine Henri, aka Mr. Dessert Man as I used to call him- but Hob wasn’t well enough to make it to the ceremony.

This was why Nan walked my dad down the aisle instead.

And I would’ve done it myself, of course, but I was already Carson’s best man (rightfully so), and my dad insisted that that was one crucial role. The bond between a comrade and his commander. Between Mr. Skywalker and Mr. Vader.

I think John was finally coming to terms with the fact that my dad couldn’t work for him forever. And if I was picking up on my father’s exit strategy, making sure John and Terry Enterprises were going to be set financially without him, then I knew for sure that Uncle John was too, and I think he felt bittersweet about my dad starting to move on.

Sweet happiness that my dad had a family now, a growing one with deep roots back in Ireland, where our incredible extended family was… and bitter loathing that Carson was somehow still in the mix, with both my dads attached at the hip for far longer than I think John ever expected.

I just found the bickering between those three to be hilarious, but I tried to feel for Uncle John because Christian Ivanov, still somehow CEO of Ivanov Corp, was even now, to this day, giving him chronic migraines.

Business was at its best, but stress was at its worst. B-Rad, aka Brad, was also making Christian more responsible for his actions since he had his own shit going on with him and his wife, the forever lovely Joan. Christian loved to take his grievances about that out on everyone but Alex of course.

So yes, my dad was looping my boyfriend and me in on playing Keep The Peace , or Change The Subject tonight in hopes those two would behave.

Fuck. Shit. Then the actual fact that Isiah wanted me to keep our statue at my place just snowballed my already-lovestruck mess of feelings into a category 5 hurricane because this meant I got to add something else of his to my top shelf collection.

Being with Isiah like this now- being with him with him- it had only made me realize how much I had cared for and loved the complete fuck out of him for literal years without me not even fully realizing it.

When we were younger, I just thought that, you know, this was my first best friend so of course I’d cherish every little thing between us… but everything he gave me became a top priority without a second thought. When I wanted to remember one of the countless irreplaceable memories we had together, I made sure they were within reach on this top shelf.

That was probably why I felt so unavoidably alone in Ireland the last year, just reading all our previous texts while I waited things out. It was all I had of him- his old messages- while I was there.

Aaaaand this was how we now found ourselves here: in my bedroom, my lips damn near fucking devouring his as my hands slipped past the smooth material of his shirt to feel that soft, bare skin, as my body reacted in the only way it knew how to the request he had. My mind had long since gone on autopilot, just giving way to my own intense urges.

At first, with the way Isiah had gotten so quiet while picking out a spot for our statue, I had thought I had maybe been a bit too much of a mess once he and I got here from school… but the way his perfect, sun-kissed skin grew more and more flush as I tried to check in, his eye contact incredibly sporadic, especially after I eventually turned him around to face me, pinning him against the dresser as I pressed myself into him… I could never have expected his explanation for why he had sort of withdrawn for a bit there.

He wasn’t uncomfortable at all. I hadn’t fucked up, thank fucking god .

He just-

He just wanted to… to wear something of mine . To have something that reminded him of me .

And by the good lord almighty, I just about lost whatever shred of self-control I still had just by hearing that. Hearing that, while he adored the necklace I got him as a birthday gift, he was just scared to wear it everywhere in case he might lose it… and a sweater would- well, then he could-

Fuck.

Fuck .

His stumbling words had painted the clearest, most vivid visuals in my head, making me just about ready to pack up my whole closet in a suitcase for him to take home. I wanted to see him in literally everything as soon as he said that, but as I rummaged through my wardrobe in record time, I found the one hoodie I knew for a fucking fact I wanted him in like yesterday.

It was my all-time favourite hoodie that I had picked up in Ireland the first week I was there, when my nerves about that kiss we shared before I left were eating me the fuck alive. Something so fucking fitting to remind me that our year apart eventually led up to this- to us working through it.

That and it was oversized… which painted even more vivid fucking visuals of how he’d look in just this and boxers. Or this and… and, well, nothing else .

Then everything just sort of snowballed from then on, dinner plans quickly falling by the wayside.

Yes, I was fully aware that I didn’t have a lock on that door I had carefully closed, trying not to draw attention, and time was pretty much just an illusion for how long Isiah and I had been in my room to begin with, but that surely didn’t stop a thing as soon as I felt Isiah’s full lips against mine, kissing me back with just as much need as I started to feel up and down that heated, velvety smooth skin, appreciating every bit of his perfectly lean midriff.

I started to press my thigh harder against him, testing every bit of that growing bulge in his jeans as well, which sent my body off the goddamn deep end.

Now, having him alone, hearing his soft, perfect fucking moans… this shit was making me act like I had been starved from touching him for seven straight days and seven nights.

Actually, scratch that, I was acting like I was breaking a forty day fast, really, and Isiah felt it too as my lips grew more intense against his, my hands reaching up to push this now open button down right off his shoulders before my arms wrapped around him, down to his incredible, downright sexy ass, and I fully lifted him up, refusing to pull my lips from his.

The black, denim jeans he wore looked so insanely hot with his exposed skin, that while his gentle, full lips felt like straight fucking heaven against me, I couldn’t stop myself from wanting even more than this. Like so much fucking more, I had to mentally tell myself to still keep some of my composure all while feeling my beyond hard dick pressing painfully against these slacks…

But our final destination after a conversation such as that one, was the bed that I quickly turned us around to, knelt down, and dropped us both on, making sure he didn’t have a single chance to pull his lips from mine while I shifted us slightly further up the mattress, until I felt him gasp for a much-needed breath.

“D-Dylan-” Isiah choked out, inhaling sharply after I practically took everything out of him with that sultry, scolding kiss, as my kisses quickly traveled from his lips down to his chin, before crossing the edge of his jaw and exploring that delicate neck of his, all while pressing his whole body further into this mattress with mine. It was the way his hands finally released their hold from my sweater to travel down to the hem of it that had me pulling away from him only momentarily so I could yank the damn thing off.

What I had once worn as something with a little razzle-dazzle for our project presentation and dinner tonight, was quickly becoming the most irritating outfit I had ever put on when I realized the buttons of the dress shirt underneath the sweater were next.

My eyes caught Isiah’s at possibly just the hottest fucking moment when I looked down, because the way those hazel-green eyes, shielded partially by his lowered eyelids, started to pan lower past mine to my build… his shaky hands damn near immediately followed, lifting themselves up and quickly undoing button after button to get this shirt off me faster.

“ F-F-Fuck ,“ I heard him mutter breathlessly, forcing this heart of mine to really try her best here at this point, otherwise I was going to have my day of judgment a whole lot sooner than I thought, and I’d have a whole lot of explaining to do with God or the universe or whoever.

I had first used the excuse of changing him into my sweater as my catalyst for undressing him to begin with, but now we were so far past the teasing at this point. The hunger in Isiah’s eyes had my stomach in complete disarray, and with how quickly he got that shirt pulled off, lifting himself up a bit to push the material off my own shoulders, I met him with my lips to his immediately once again.

This kiss was feverish. It was reminding me again and again of how much Isiah actually wanted this too- to be with me . There was no me getting over this with him asking in the most sweetest, sexiest, wholesome fucking way that he wanted to wear something of mine that reminded him of me. That he hopefully liked seeing what he made me on the top shelf in my room.

And that, most importantly, he genuinely fucking loved me just as much as I genuinely loved him…

While I managed to hold myself up with my right elbow near his head on this mattress, my left hand left the soft skin of his jaw that was tilting his head up further for this kiss, to travel down his bare skin, past his toned shoulders, his firm chest, his sculpted stomach, towards the waistband of his jeans, finding that button and zipper quickly.

I could feel Isiah trembling under me as both our escalating moans and deeper groans got lost in this kiss, Isiah pulling my top lip between his own before I couldn’t help but push my tongue past his lips, all but demanding more.

The home had smelt like all the food all the old heads in the kitchen were cooking as soon as we had walked in, but right now, especially with my bedroom door closed, the only scent invading my senses was Isiah’s incredible cologne and new, distinct shampoo… and it was damn near making me dizzy with how even more turned on it fucking made me, as if him alone wasn’t enough to send me literally spiraling .

Isiah’s hands were fucking everywhere, too, making me all the more damn feral- my shoulders, my firm chest, back to my shoulders, then to my own toned arms that were most definitely flexed right now by just how urgently they were working themselves to feed my urges, and I heard the most satisfying moan vibrate against my lips as it slipped past his unbelievably soft ones, but that turned into the most throaty whimper I had ever heard when I managed to get his jeans unbuttoned and unzipped, before my large hand slid past everything, both these jeans and his briefs, to wrap my fingers around his bare, slick, fully leaking tip.

Isiah’s nails dug into my skin a bit as his breathing went from labored to damn near fatal. He was the one who broke this kiss again, gasping for air as clearer moans fell past his now swelling, full lips.

I don’t think I got even two full strokes in up and down his length before I felt one of his now trembling hands let go of my bicep to reach lower and grab my forearm.

“W-W-” Isiah took another sharp inhale, “w-wai-w-wait D-Dylan- w-wai-”

I pulled my face only a smidge away from his… and the way he looked right now made me close my eyes for just a fraction of a second because while I thought I was doing okay just a second ago, the way Isiah looked right now, gazing at me through those beautiful, hazy, dilated eyes while his face was damn near crimson, his bare chest rising and falling rapidly directly below me…

That shit drove me right to the edge of unexpectedly coming, I swear to god.

“W-What-” I tried to croak out, but everything about my voice was completely shot to hell, especially once I opened my eyes again to him. “W-What’s w-wrong?”

“I-I-I’m-” he stuttered, struggling to get through while trying to hold my gaze now. “Y-You’re- I-… Y-Y-You’re going to- t-to make me-” Isiah then shut his eyes a second before managing a bit better to say, “m-my j-jeans-… d-dinner-”

Fuckk… were both a goddamn breathy mess, yet I still understood what he meant. I had barely touched him, but considering I was about to cum from this- how utterly unreal he looked directly below me, I literally had not a single right to judge.

Not one at all.

And so I slowly let go of Isiah’s hard, slick tip, easing my hand gently out of his briefs and jeans. As Isiah started to gain more control over breathing, however, mine only grew more laboured by what I chose to ask him next.

“C-Can I… can I use my mouth, I-Isiah?”

Isiah’s whole face tightened instantly at that, including his grip on my bare skin as I watched those eyelids lower further while the deepest shiver cut through his body.

I could see it- him trying to stop himself from getting too close to coming as his body started to shake slightly beneath me. And I knew I hadn’t even tried to mask the pure desperation in my voice as I damn near begged for him to say yes…

But he didn’t even get the chance to answer that more sinful question because we both stalled a moment when we suddenly heard the faint sound of the front door opening, before voices got a bit louder in the living room out there.

And as if we needed any further confirmation that things definitely weren’t going any further than this- at least not right now- my dad soon called out, “Dylan, your mum is here!”

••

45. Mother Knows Best

Another chappy chap because I’m about to start spamming the last 15 chapters like my IDNHSRWTW days…

Stay tuned till the end to see why lol

Love y’all to bits!

P.S. once I finish this book, Substack will get updated with edits on the rest of the chapters, and I’ll move to update Inkitt after

xoxo

Dylan

“S-Sorry, I… I got a bit carried away,” I whispered to Isiah as I pulled the large, thick sweater up over his head after guiding his raised arms through the soft-lined sleeves. Isiah’s face- well, his whole body really- was beet red, deepening in color while I finished dressing him, something I one hundred percent insisted on, but he still managed to shake his head no slightly.

“D-Don’t- don’t apologize,” he mumbled, still a bit breathless, yet once my right hand tipped that chin of his up higher, forcing him to look up at me from where he sat on the edge of the bed, he offered me a smile that just fucked my heart rate all the way up all the fuck over again. Those stunning hazel-green eyes of his betrayed the hell out of him, however, when I released his chin to grab my sweater, which I most definitely discarded somewhere during that heated make-out session.

I could feel his gaze all over my shirtless body, making a playful smirk form on my lips as I finished pulling my sweater on. I said fuck it to the button-down undershirt out of nothing but pure, sheer laziness, and realistically, Isiah and I had about five more seconds before my dad came to drag us out there himself, so we got a move on.

“Dylan!” My mum had the widest grin on her face as I took those few steps past the corridor and into the living room, where she was standing by the couch, with Isiah right behind me. Her eyes were also just as wide as that smile when she finally got a good look at my height. “H-Holy shit …”

I found myself easily matching her grin, opening my arms and bending down a bit to pull her in for a tight hug. “Hi Mum!” Her hugs felt like they always did- comforting

• but I could also feel her heavily patting my arms, shoulders, and back above this thick sweater before she abruptly pulled away.

“Don, what the hell have you been feeding our son? “ She demanded when she turned toward my dad in the kitchen. He just shrugged, now wiping down the kitchen island with a kitchen towel.

He had glanced up for a second, but when his eyes shifted from my mother’s… to me… to Isiah… I watched in real time as his eyebrows furrowed slightly. He had noticed the sweater on Isiah, I mean, he was definitely with me when I bought it in Galway, Ireland, but he said nothing about it.

I could tell by the now fully set dining table that dinner would be served soon, and after getting a good look at the oven clock, I quickly realized that Isiah and I had been gone for over half an hour.

Honestly, I was more surprised no one had interrupted us sooner, and regardless of my annoyance in the moment, if Isiah and I had really started something I wasn’t able to finish in that bedroom, I would just be straight up pissed. Stopping when we did was probably for the best, which was only further confirmed once I glanced back at Isiah for a moment.

“Apparently, the universe thought I needed yet another reminder of how terribly obvious it is that he sure is my offspring,” my father then grumbled, which made us all chuckle. No amount of years could pass where I’d forget that this man seriously dragged me to a clinic for a DNA test eight years ago.

A mirror would’ve been more than enough, but I couldn’t blame the man for being thorough. Especially with how he was when I first showed up at his front door.

“How many inches did you shoot up?” My mum asked, turning back towards me.

“About five, I think, right, Dad?” I asked, turning my head in the direction of my old man. Last time I measured myself was in Ireland, a couple weeks before our flight back, and I had come in at close to 6’3 and a half.

“Something like that,” he replied. “All I know is that I could still carry you before we left for Ireland, and now you could not fucking pay me to let you come anywhere near my back.”

I couldn’t help but full-on laugh at that, watching as my mum took a slight step further back to really get a good look at me. Then her gaze lowered slightly, shifting to my left, and she must’ve caught sight of who was finally gaining the courage to take those last few steps, joining me at my side, because once my mum saw Isiah, her grin only widened to an unprecedented size.

“Isiah!” She exclaimed, beelining it right past me and straight for my boyfriend before pulling him into another tight hug. Isiah chuckled, hugging my mum back immediately, but I could see his face turning a rosier color than it already was.

His nerves were probably wreaking havoc, considering he hadn’t seen my mum for a year, too, but I could tell he was trying to act calmer- more composed. He knew that hell would freeze over before my mum ever held him taking the time he needed away, over his head. It would’ve been massively hypocritical on her part, considering the choices she had made that landed me here with my dad to begin with, and her next words only further solidified my thoughts.

“I’m happy to have you back here. You and Dylan will have to catch me up on how the start to your senior year has been!”

No mention of the year he and I didn’t talk for.

No mention of the haircut or the tattoos.

Just a warm embrace from a woman who had spent the last eight years never casting the first stone our way. And I think I appreciated this response the most today. It felt… mothering. Isiah’s smile only widened as my mum forced herself to let him go, and my boyfriend gave her a nod.

Even with a busy schedule, I noticed that my mum had taken the time to spruce herself up a bit more for the early dinner.

The roots of her hair were touched up, the vibrance of the now reddish-brown color making me smile even though I liked to see a bit of her grey hairs coming in.

I thought the color mixed in with those brown and red hues was beautiful.

For a change, she was actually in a nice, black, loosely fitted turtleneck sweater instead of her usual black button-down for work, and some really nice office slacks. She was still working in the restaurant industry, but she was actually working at Collin’s restaurant now as one of the managers.

It had gone through so many rebrands in the last eight years that I think it was now called Le Menu or some shit, but she had climbed up from a waitress to management, and with that came more responsibilities and hours. She really liked it there, though, with Collin now both the owner and head chef, and he seemed to love my mother just as much, which was nice.

After hearing the way Carson made a complete mess of that situation, I’m glad the guy didn’t hate all of us.

My mum hadn’t missed a single scheduled day of work in the last eight years, without calling in at least 24 hours ahead, and that made me proud in ways I didn’t even know how to begin to describe.

I respected how much work she put in. This was the most passionate she had been about anything besides checking in on my school work, and honestly, the first year or so was an adjustment because she had never been so involved with that before.

I got to see in real time my mum finding out that I was actually pretty damn good at this school stuff.

“It’s been awesome, Ms. Holland!” Isiah assured her. “Feels like the final countdown, but Dylan and I are pretty locked in right now. We’ll get this year wrapped up strong, scout’s honor,” and both Isiah and I raised our three fingers up dutifully, giving my mum our word.

“Dylan?” My dad called out from the kitchen, taking a brief pause to swat Carson’s hand away from some desserts I could now see were set against the back counter of the kitchen.

I had missed them earlier when I strolled through to say hi to John and my dads, but that giddy feeling bubbling up once I caught a glimpse of the sweet treats simply mirrored the excitement Carson had… only his was quickly shot down by my dad pointing to serving dishes that needed to go out into the dining area.

“What’s up, Pops?” I asked, my gaze finally meeting his, only for him to look at me sternly, clearly telling me that the desserts were for after dinner, and not a moment before.

“Why don’t you and Isiah show your mum what Isiah made quick?” He then shifted his gaze to my mother. “The kids apparently aced some science project. Not sure what the hell they made, but they insist it wasn’t a bomb and my home is still standing, so… I’m counting that as a win in our parenting book.”

My mum nodded, giving my dad a large smile before she gestured back to the corridor. “Well, lead the way, boys. I’m in the mood to be wowed .”

And that just put the largest grin on both Isiah’s and my own face as I quickly beelined it back to the bedroom Isiah and I had literally just come from.

I could brag about this handsome guy for literal hours, easily.

“My word, Isiah, this is amazing!” My mother beamed, turning the sculpture carefully in her delicate hands as Isiah and I stood next to the dresser, rocking back and forth on the balls of our feet while she gave it all the attention it deserved, and then some.

He and I had been sharing glances for the last few minutes, damn near telepathically determining that now was probably as good a time as ever to tell her about us. I didn’t want to do it with everyone else around, because she deserved to know before John and Derek.

I wasn’t really nervous to, and I knew that Isiah was comfortable with it… But like, how the actual hell was I even supposed to bring it up right now? Like blurting it out felt a little too sudden, but the work I was putting in to try and figure out a segway was even more damning.

“Thank you, Ms. Holland,” Isiah gave her a warm smile, returning the gleaming one she directed at my boyfriend- shit, I was so ready to abuse the hell out of saying that- before glancing back down at the artwork in her hands. I was still getting used to towering over her now, considering I was only a few inches taller than her before I left for Ireland.

“Of course! Gosh, you really got some skilled hands there. Are you taking any workshops this year?”

Isiah nodded. “I made this in welding. My instructor agreed it’ll go towards my midterm exam for October, so it really was some time well spent. Killing two birds with one stone.”

I tried to keep my grin modest… but I already knew the look I gave Isiah was anything but toned down, because as soon as his eyes shifted up to mine, he looked away immediately, the faintest of blush rising up from his neck to his face. He had started to fidget a bit mindlessly with the long sleeves of my hoodie he was now wearing, and that in return spread heat quickly through all of me.

I was still trying to get used to this- how insanely perfect he looked in it. How the sleeves fell past his hands, so he had to scrunch them up, only allowing them to roll down again when he started to get a bit fidgety with his fingers.

“Hey mum,” I spoke, deciding I was absolutely at wits’ end with trying to hold myself back when all I wanted to do right now was reach down for that left hand of his with my right, pulling him closer to me than he already was.

“Hmm?” She asked, glancing up at me this time.

“I, um… well… I- well, we-” I gestured gently to Isiah and I, catching his eye again just to make like absolutely positively one hundred percent certain that he was cool with this, and he gave me a slight nod, even if his face was burning up like the mesospheric layer of this planet, “-wanted to, um… to maybe like… run something by you?”

I watched as my mother’s dark eyebrows furrowed slightly, but she nodded, carefully placing the sculpture back onto the top shelf before fully turning to us. “Is everything okay?” She then asked. “It’s… It’s okay if it wasn’t before… but is it okay now?”

Isiah and I nodded almost immediately, understanding what she was getting at.

“Y-Yeah,” I further confirmed. “N-No, we’re, um- we’re good now. It’s just that… like… we’re like… more than good?” I offered. Honestly, it sounded like it made far more sense in my head, because once I said it out loud, hell, even I was a bit confused as to what I was trying to get at. “L-Like we, um… we’re friends again, but… but like… well, like more than that too…”

My mum took a whole second, digesting my words as she glanced back and forth between Isiah and I… but I watched as that realization settled, and a smile began to play on her lips.

“Oh… I see .”

Isiah and I had to immediately avoid her gaze as we tried to mask our own smiles.

“I-Is… I-Is that okay, Ms. Holland?” Isiah asked nervously, but both his and my own eyes snapped back to my mother when she released a soft chuckle.

“Well, obviously it’s okay,” I heard her warm voice say. “You two have been inseparable for forever. Why wouldn’t this be okay? I mean, I don’t think there’s a single person on this planet my son speaks more highly of than you, Isiah. If I didn’t see how great you were firsthand, I’d think he’s been blowing smoke up his ass all these years.”

That full-on made Isiah and me chuckle, but I could feel more heat rising to my face. I really didn’t think I had been that obvious all these years, but apparently, I lacked a massive degree of self-awareness.

“You two are happy, though, right?” She asked us.

Isiah nodded firmly right away, and I confirmed it with a “very,” at the exact same time, causing my gaze to shift down to his, and vice versa. I didn’t even know how to express how happy he made me, but the way his hands fidgeted more inside those long sleeves let me know he at least got an idea of just how down bad I actually was with this relationship.

“Perfect! Then let’s lay down some quick rules before we start in on dinner,” my mother exclaimed, clasping her hands together. “Isiah,” she first pointed to my boyfriend. “You’re seeing my son, which means no more disappearing. Is that hypocritical of me to say? Yes. But Dylan deserves the best. That and between him and his father, their bluntness runs in the family. Transparency and communication is clearly a massive thing for them.”

Isiah nodded immediately, but both our faces in this moment were turning redder and redder.

“And Dylan,” my mum continued, pointing to me now, “if something is seriously troubling you, speak to someone for the love of god . I know you two like your secrets, but as your father and I like to remind you… we’re getting old. We care far less about the mistakes and more about your happiness, got it?”

I nodded just as quickly as Isiah had. My mum definitely didn’t experience the worst of my melodramatic attitude while I was in Ireland, like my dads had, but she sure had taken her fair share of phone calls where I was moody at best.

“Beautiful. And most of all,” my mum concluded, now gesturing between both Isiah and myself, “It’s senior year. You two have always been a power house, but finish strong .  And most importantly, enjoy your senior year. Don’t tell your father I said this last part, Dylan, but as long as you don’t get in trouble with faculty or do anything to damage your record, go live a little. You both are good kids with much stronger morals than Don and I had at your age. Don’t let that senior citizen of a man tell you any different.”

That made Isiah and I laugh a bit more comfortably, before we both nodded. Somehow, I just knew my dad must’ve felt that senior citizen comment from the kitchen like there was some disturbance in the force.

“Now,” my mum sighed contentedly with a smile, “can we join the others for dinner, or do you two have any more bombs to drop on me? Don said you two didn’t make one, but clearly he was mistaken.”

Isiah glanced up at me just as I shifted my gaze back down to him, but we slowly shook our heads no, before turning back to my mother.

“I… I think that was it?” I offered. “I’m pretty sure Pops and Carson know. And we’ll figure out a way to sort of bring it up to Derek and Uncle John tonight…”

“Oh, and I still kind of need to tell my dad,” Isiah added, to which my mum nodded at both comments. “But other than that, we’ve been pretty open about it at school.”

“That’s good,” my mum then smiled. “Also… I don’t mean to be the bearer of complicated news… but I had my suspicions of something going on after being here for like five minutes. I don’t think John and Derek are as in the dark as you might think, so don’t put a whole lot of pressure on yourselves about telling them, alright?”

My boyfriend and I nodded again, diverting our gaze once more. I had thought I had tried my best to at least act remotely normal, but clearly that wasn’t the fucking case.

I had known it after Friday night- that things between us- between Isiah and I- had changed.

After we had both confessed our feelings in just about the most insane way possible, I knew there wasn’t any going back after that… and now that at least all my parents knew, it felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders.

I didn’t express that too openly, though, because Isiah still had to tell his dad. And I made a vow right then and there to try and make that as seamless as possible, because the way his mum found out was possibly the most chaotic, traumatizing way ever.

He deserved better than that, as did his parents.

Like way, way fucking better.

••

Now… because I love y’all and I heard y’all loud and clear…

Here is just a sneak peek of the cover and character cards/aesthetic for a spin off/stand alone coming after this one… :)

“Now what the hell did I say about romance in this goddamn café?” Mickey asked the entire staff, that stern tone bleeding into his deep, low, comforting rumble of a voice. “It’s banned here,” Eve stated with her own usual monotoned words. “Exactly,” Mickey replied, “so pull yourselves the fuck together, otherwise we’re completely fucked this holiday season. Get in your sadness, emotionally overwhelmed bag, and get the hell to work; we got new recipes to come up with.”

They say Wilmoria’s Café makes the best treats when the bakers and baristas are fueled

solely

by their own broken hearts…

Nineteen-year-old Ryker had finally done it. Broken away from his abusive father. Taking a job at Wilmoria’s Café, he hoped for a quiet new beginning—somewhere he could rebuild his life, focus on trying to graduate high school, and rediscover a sense of safety. But his plan for solitude is quickly upended when he meets Mickey—Micah Jackson—a warm, patient 22-year-old baker and recent college grad who’s been at the café for years.

As Ryker learns the rhythms of his new life—the smell of vanilla treats, fresh bread, and coffee beans; the hum of the espresso machine and the soft laughter of coworkers… Mickey becomes his unexpected constant. What begins as mutual hatred between them both slowly deepens into something Ryker never thought he could have: trust, affection, and love. But healing isn’t simple. Between confronting his past, his mistakes, and learning to open his heart, Ryker must decide whether he can truly believe in a future where he’s safe, seen, and genuinely loved for who he is, all while he discovers who exactly he is. Perhaps who he wants to be.

“Broken Hearts Café” is a tender story about rebuilding after trauma, finding family in unexpected places—a café, a biker club—as well as the courage it takes to love again after getting it so utterly wrong the first time.

ʀʏᴋᴇʀ

ᴘᴀʀᴋᴇʀ ᴀɢᴇ: 19 ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ: ᴏᴄᴛᴏʙᴇʀ 31ꜱᴛ ᴢᴏᴅɪᴀᴄ: ꜱᴄᴏʀᴘɪᴏ ♏︎

┗━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━┛ —

ᴍɪᴄᴀʜ ᴊᴀᴄᴋꜱᴏɴ (ᴍɪᴄᴋᴇʏ) ᴀɢᴇ: 22 ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ: ꜰᴇʙʀᴜᴀʀʏ 29ᴛʜ (ʟᴇᴀᴘ ʏᴇᴀʀ) ᴢᴏᴅɪᴀᴄ: ᴘɪꜱᴄᴇꜱ ♓︎

┗━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━┛ —

There are like 10 total main characters, and I am so proud of how the aesthetics turned out lol. Only took me four score and seven fucking years

The story is going to be gay asf, following both a gay

and

lesbian budding romance after heartbreak, all within Wilmoria’s

It’s a café/biker club mash-up

Oh, and surprise: I’m tying this one into my book Fight Club because at this point I’m creating a universe lol

Anyways, y’all are about to get spammed with the last 15 or so chapters for IASWAK (it’s going to be a RIDE) because I literally have twenty chapters written for this next book and can’t wait to drop it

One of the most romantic books I’ve ever written, and got me out of my writer’s block these last three weeks while I moved and changed jobs (I spent every evening writing)

Let me know with the poll below on what y’all think about the new book!

xoxo

46. There And Back Again

Isiah

“So… let me get this straight,” Derek started, pausing to take one massive bite of his Bistecca alla Fiorentina. He made sure to chew the perfectly cooked meat thoroughly and swallow before he continued. “You two,” he then waved his cleaned fork at Dylan and myself from across the table, “are… dating? “

John gently patted Derek’s upper thigh with his right hand, holding him tighter on his lap with the left arm he had wrapped around Derek’s waist…

And Derek was currently sitting on John’s lap because there were seven of us, and this table only sat 6.

Don had suggested that he could just pull up an extra chair from his office space… after he told John to go kick rocks about suggesting he purchase a larger table, with Don’s exact words being, “there are three people who live in this penthouse. I’m not purchasing anything bigger, but you’re more than welcome to sit on the fucking floor if you got some more shit to say about my furniture.”

John then took that as an opportunity to offer his lap to his husband, which I guess Derek had no protests about.

“I… I thought you picked up on that, love,” John gently cooed near Derek’s ear. “Wasn’t that why you looked at the two all suspiciously earlier when they walked in the front door?”

Derek turned his head back to his husband. “ No , I looked at them oddly because Dylan made a comment about Isiah’s tanner skin being a perfect canvas for the tattoos, and I thought Dylan was self-cautious about getting a tattoo himself since he’s paler.“

I turned my head to my right, glancing at Dylan to see how he’d react to that… and he just seemed utterly confused at best.

“Dylan isn’t getting a tattoo any time soon,” Don replied, glancing up from his own plate to eye his son from across the table.

“ Hey now ,“ Dylan shot back quick, “I am a legal adult, you know.”

“Yes, and I know your pain tolerance, remember? I do have eight years under my belt,” Don countered. “As soon as that needle touches your fragile skin, you’re bolting.”

Dylan’s right hand went to his chest immediately, mocking that verbal attack. “I absolutely beg to diff-”

“Let’s bet on it,” Don was quick with, and Dylan immediately looked away, mumbling a hasty “ never mind,“ which I had to try to stifle a chuckle at.

I had made a vow to myself that I would support this guy publicly… but his dad was right, there wasn’t a fat chance in hell that Dylan was going to commit to anything but maybe like a dot on his forearm.

“Well…” John continued, clearly searching for how to respond to his husband. “Regardless, I think that’s great. I’m proud of you two for coming out to us like this. You know, honesty -”

“ Don’t you fucking start, “ Carson grumbled, putting both Dylan and I in the unexpected fight of our fucking lives to muffle more blatant laughter at this table.

“ Hey , I already apologized years ago,“ Dylan reminded John jokingly. “And while I told Isiah literally as soon as I found out about my dads dating, any secrets between him and I stay that way. Also, if we’re being honest, the real culprit is probably Danise. She knew exactly how often Carson was over and looked you in your eyes with every visit, saying nothing.”

“Hey, we can’t throw Dani under the bus like that,” I had to correct Dylan quickly, “she’s still our most pristine snickerdoodle supplier.”

Dylan took a sharp inhale, placing his left hand on the upper thigh of my right leg under this table to give it a gentle squeeze. “Damn, no, you’re totally right. I’m fucking with our supply, saying shit like that.”

I expected him to remove his hand at some point since he and I were still eating like everyone else at this table, but he just casually picked up the fork with his right hand instead, which forced me to try and control my heart rate once again for about the nine billionth time this afternoon.

“I think,” Carson cut in with a swiftness, “that how John found out is irrelevant. We’re eight years in now and still going strong, so clearly everything worked itself out, right?”

Don shot his husband a pointed look, which was probably related to the whole policy fiasco, but the man said nothing more about it, sparing Carson the shame.

“Do we still have the swear jar going?” Ms. Holland asked, eyeing Dylan for his more… creative language at the dinner table, but Carson chimed in a second later.

“That lasted like a day and a half. Don crunched the numbers quick and decided that he refused to take the personal hit to his finances, so cuss to your heart’s content, Lisa.”

Ms. Holland gave Carson a look, but I could see that smile threatening on her lips. No one at this table was making it a week without swearing in front of each other, besides maybe me, because my mum was a stickler for that stuff with guests. She didn’t care if it was just Dylan, though; she knew who his father was.

“Speaking of you and your under-the-table cookie dealings with Danise,” Don segwayed, and I knew the groan from Dylan was coming before he even let it out.

“Not under the table if they’re on the lobby counter, Dad ,” Dylan argued. “It’s not our fault she and I are in synch with when they just got out the oven.”

“And unfortunately,” I quickly added, “we can be easily bought. She’s already been initiated into our inner circle for secret sharing.”

Dylan looked over at me with a large grin, before chanting quietly, “ One of us. One of us. One of us. “ Which had me grinning massively like a freaking idiot. I still felt all gooey inside just knowing he had told Danise about us in the first place.

“The fact that she made it in and I didn’t is insane work,” Carson grumbled quietly.

“Respectfully,” Dylan countered, turning back to Carson, “we’ve both tried your snickerdoodles. The general consensus is: don’t ever do that shit again.”

I could practically see in real time Carson’s soul being crushed by Dylan’s words.

“Respectfully,” Dylan added quick, like that was going to do anything to cushion the fall from the seventeenth-floor window he just shoved Carson’s pride out of.

“It’s okay, love,” Don came to his husband’s defense, patting him gently on his shoulder. “You still sit through all the nerdy movies with Dylan and Isiah when I’d sooner sell my internal organs on the black market, the credentials of the person removing them be damned. You’re still useful to him even with subpar baking skills.”

The smile quickly spreading across Carson’s lips seemed to confirm that all was, in fact, well again, and I just rolled with it. Carson was always too easy around his husband.

“But anyways, that’s not what I’m getting at,” Don continued. “Dylan, you and Isiah should try to make it over to Wilmoria’s Cafe this next month or two before the holidays. They’ve been busier and busier every year starting in November, and I got word from Pricilla that Mickey graduated this summer. Looks like he moved back from Boston and has been putting in permanent, full-time hours at the café.”

That had Dylan and me perking up fucking instantly . I felt his hand give my thigh another gentle squeeze.

“Permanent?!” Dylan asked, his excitement mirroring my own to a T. “Like as in he’s here now? Like, as in Isiah and I don’t have to wait till his winter break?”

“ Yes ,“ Don chuckled. “Now I do have a GPS tracker on my vehicle, so I expect you to show some fucking restraint . Otherwise, I’ll actually start making Pricilla incorporate spinach in her sweets.”

“Don,” Derek sighed in between a bite of food. I hadn’t realized how quiet he had gotten until I saw just how much of his plate he had cleared, and in what had to be record timing, too. “You’re successfully ruining my appetite with such blasphemous words like that.”

Don gave Derek a pointed look this time. “I refuse to believe anything can do that.”

John was the one who spoke up, coming to Derek’s defense. Sorta. “ Actually , Derek went on a hunger strike in solidarity with Herold when the poor kitty couldn’t eat for a few days after his last surgery.“

And Derek was quick to explain with, “It was crucial that I understood how poor Herold felt.” Carson nodded his head… but Don just looked at John and Derek like they might be actually batshit insane.

I was pretty sure Ms. Holland tried to chime in after, playing the peaceful mediator between these two couples, but I checked out right the fuck when I felt Dylan’s large hand shift a bit further up my thigh, making me shiver as he leaned in closer to me.

“You wanna get some hot chocolate to go on our way to the cabin Friday?” He whispered. I turned my head in his direction, trying not to look like this guy was messing around with the dials for my internal temperatures just by being this fucking close.

“Y-Yes,” I still managed to rush out. “A thousand percent yes. No questions asked, no convincing needed.”

And I swear to god that smile he gave me, his eyes slowly shifting a bit lower to my lips, almost had me just leaning in the rest of the way.

Luckily, Dylan had some sense to pull away because I sure fucking didn’t anymore.

“Pops,” he said, turning to his dad. “Isiah and I will stop by Friday before we leave for the cabin.”

Don nodded in return, and Carson gave us both a thumbs up before he and his husband launched back into the conversation with Ms. Holland, Derek, and John about whether or not Herold was even remotely worth not eating for.

Dylan then turned to me again and said, “Don’t forget: Halloween costumes Sunday on our way back, yeah?”

I nodded quickly, grinning wide. And when I say this weekend could not have come soon enough… I fucking meant that shit.

The rest of dinner was honestly a whole blast.

I always thought my family was chaotic when we got together, yet being around Dylan’s, along with John and Derek, made me seriously happy.

I was already on cloud fucking nine thanks to Dylan’s mum and the fact that everyone now knew about me and this handsome guy currently driving me home, but that feeling of nostalgia and just good people, good food, and good conversation- however ADHD coded it was- made me genuinely sad when we all eventually had to say goodbye.

Derek was the first to head out for his meeting with Onyx, and John ended up leaving with him so he could walk him all the way out to his motorcycle, with Herold in tow.

The desserts that were served after the main courses had me just about ready to go lie down, but Dylan’s dads made sure Dylan drove me home at a respectable time since it was still a school night.

I had wanted to apologize to Ms. Holland, too, about disappearing like that, but I got the about halfway through an apology as I gave her a hug goodbye, and she told me to shut my trap… so we left things at that, with me now sporting a smile I simply couldn’t shake for the life of me from then on.

“Thank you for coming,” Dylan said from the driver’s seat now. He had his right hand comfortably on my left thigh, while his left hand held the steering wheel. “And just, like, for everything.”

Jesus fucking Christ , if I smiled any wider I was about to have the scars the Joker had in The Dark Knight.

“Thanks for inviting me,” I replied, welcoming the brief grin Dylan gave me as he glanced over.

He was keeping the glances brief to focus on the road, but we were only a few minutes from my apartment complex. I hadn’t even realized how close we were because he and I were busy deciding exactly what we were taking on the mini roadtrip from Wilmoria’s for basically this entire ride. “Now I just know for absolute certain that the rest of this week is going to drag itself the hell out before we finally get to Friday,” I couldn’t help but admit.

Dylan sighed, and that sigh alone told me he one hundred percent agreed.

“At least the weather looks promising this weekend,” Dylan countered. “That, and once we get our well-earned perfect score in AP Chem, we’ll get to be insufferable to our class and Mr. Zinfel for at least a few days.”

I released a sigh this time, but it was a content one.

This was what Dylan and I lived for.

Everything about being with him like this, too, just felt so goddamn addictive that I physically felt the pain of having to leave him when my apartment building finally came into view. There was nothing I wouldn’t do to wish for a few extra minutes, but considering how a few extra minutes had turned out this last weekend, right outside my apartment, Dylan and I weren’t willing to risk a damn thing to jeopardize our plans for the upcoming weekend.

We wanted this trip. Badly.

So this meant that our goodbye was brief as shit…

Well… sorta.

Dylan did still pull me back in, bringing my lips back to his after the first short but tender kiss, just to have another, but my brain pretty much screamed to my all too willing body that we had to get the hell out of this car. Now . Because I was a second away from testing our luck.

He still rolled down the passenger window right after I closed the door, to thank me yet again for the sculpture, and the way my body practically hummed with warmth had me already thinking of the next excuse I could find to make him something else.

The sculpture  had earned me what I was wearing now as I made my way up to my apartment, with my jacket draped over my arm. I had started to bring the collar of the hoodie up to my nose while Dylan drove me home, basking in the scent of his cologne that lingered on the soft fabric, but Dylan damn near drove his dad’s vehicle off the road when that particular glance he gave me turned to an intense stare, and that was quite enough of that.

Now that I was home, however, I wasted zero time making it inside so I could be all sappy about wearing this.

My mum had left me a quick note letting me know her and my dad had ran out to do a quick grocery run, so I took the time to first let Dylan know I was safely inside, a request he made after thanking me for the sculpture through the rolled down window, then I stripped myself bare in the bathroom and took a quick shower.

After all that… the sweatshirt was right back on me.

I swear to god I had never felt something so soft and warm. It made climbing into bed and tucking myself in feel like I was wrapped in literal clouds. Hell, it was only like 8:30 PM at this point, but I didn’t give a shit.

Dylan had texted me back, telling me thanks yet again, along with an I love you follow-up text, and the way my heart reacted to that just made me cuddle up inside this hoodie even harder.

There was no way to explain how desperately I wished he were here in bed with me now, with his large arms wrapped around me. Everything about tonight just-

I was ashamed to say I let out something equivalent to a fucking squeal as I burrowed myself further into this sweater, before typing out a text under the covers that said I loved him too. Before I hit send, however, I decided to… well… to do something that I had simply never ever fucking done a day before in my entire life…

And trust me, that soon showed as I quickly pushed my duvet further down the bed, slid the soft briefs I had put on after my shower all the way down, and kicked them off before I opened up the camera app on my phone.

Up until this point in my life… I had never thought about sending a pic to anyone …

But the way Dylan looked at me in that car, shortly before he damn near steered it off the road, had replayed in my mind more times than could possibly ever be even remotely healthy.

And after maybe forty photos taken from every angle I could possibly think of, before sifting through the album for the best one like I was selecting photos for America’s Next Top Model, I finally decided on a picture I was comfortable with.

We might have both sort of gotten carried away in his bedroom… but I still remembered what he had said, like he was whispering it to me now.

“With like-… the sleeves rolled up a little… with… with just this on, and-… and… nothing else.”

The photo I landed on didn’t show too much, but it did deliver on almost exactly what he asked for- what he wanted , and I pulled a section of the hem of the hoodie up, using a small bit of it held tight with my free hand to cover up just my hard on so Dylan could really tell that the only thing I was wearing was this.

His.

After about another ten minutes of making absolutely positively one hundred percent with zero second guessing that this photo was the one, a text came through from Dylan right as I hit send on the photo, along with my I love you too .

He had texted me:

Isiah?

I didn’t even realize I had taken this fucking long to take, then decide on a photo before texting back, but I didn’t even have the chance to respond to that text because right as I was typing back, a call came through from him, overtaking my phone screen.

I sat up instantly, scrambling around on my bed a bit in an attempt to get my shit together before I hit answer.

“H-Hello?” I spoke, my voice a breathless fucking mess from the unexpected call and state of panic I had quite literally gone into.

“I-Isiah…” Dylan replied with his own deep, raspy voice, instantly making my toes curl as they gripped the thin sheet I was lying on. “L-Let’s FaceTime.”

••

47. Matters Of The Highest Importance

Dylan

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/42bef8a1a3be7cdcdcc56c6ebd1e10103719126f/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f3544396a6b7579597162457558673d3d2d313539343937373335372e313838313665373038393262643935633331373834343730363632372e6a7067)               

The ways in which I practically flew this SUV to school Tuesday morning would’ve absolutely sent my father into cardiac arrest.

But what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him….

And for maybe the first time in my entire life, I was on a mission regarding matters of the highest importance.

After dropping Isiah off Monday evening, I made sure I was quick to get the hell home. Isiah and I had an understanding that from now until this upcoming weekend came to an official end Sunday night, Halloween costume shopping included, we were going to be nothing short of some goddamn model citizens.

I sure as shit wasn’t about to do a single thing that could have my dad calling off our little roadtrip, and Isiah was right there with me on this one.

I also desperately wanted to see Mickey. He was going to lose his mind finding out about Isiah and I, no doubt.

Isiah and I both knew all too well that it could only take one fuck up for my ass to be grass, so I made sure I was back home in record time to help pack up the minimal leftovers- minimal because Derek absolutely forced John to take about ninety percent home with him- and clean what my dad hadn’t gotten to, which was honestly just the used plates and silverware.

That didn’t take long at all, and I could tell both my dads were ready to call it a night right away, Carson more so than my dad. And that was expected because this was just how Carson got whenever John was in town. Tonight would be a headphones night for sure.

My old man poured himself a nice and full glass of wine, then he and Carson retired for the remainder of the evening, each giving me a hug, and my dad his usual forehead kiss before they said goodnight and made their way to their bedroom. Carson was all but dragging my dad down that corridor, though, being only somewhat mindful of the glass of wine still in my Pops’s hand as I heard him chuckle lightly.

Isiah had texted me while I was still waiting patiently outside his apartment complex, letting me know he made it inside okay. And yes, sue me, but I did in fact somewhat pray to every higher being I could think of that Isiah had maybe somehow forgotten his key at school or something, and I’d just get to drive us back to my home.

I was even working on the whole script I’d tell my dear father to allow him to let Isiah spend the night, but that text from my beautiful boyfriend eventually came through, confirming all my hopes and dreams for a night together with Isiah was immediately shot down.

After I retired to my own bedroom, I ended up deciding to just shower in the morning because my bed was genuinely calling my name. Sleep wasn’t really tempting me, considering it wasn’t late at all, but at least getting to rest on a soft mattress was tempting, so I just stripped off my day clothes and climbed on in.

This body was probably like 5 seconds into finally resting these bones before I navigated to my messages with Isiah, choosing to send him just one more thank you text along with what I had meant to say when I dropped him off tonight.

That I loved him.

And once I got that message sent, I patiently waited from the comfort of my bed, wrapped all up in my bedcover, for him to eventually reply…

… and I waited…

… aaaand waited…

… aaaaand waited …

After damn near close to half an hour of me just lying here, growing increasingly tired of checking whatever social media apps I barely ever fucking frequented, I sent him a follow-up text, not caring how clingy I most definitely looked now.

Isiah?

The message barely had time to say delivered before a text came through from him. I saw the first blue text bubble show in our chat log, saying:

I love you too

That literally alone was enough to put my restlessness at rest, even though he could’ve very well had just gotten busy with homework or fallen asleep, and I was the one being insane…

That was until the second bubble popped up with an image.

An image that damn near just about stopped my heartbeat.

I clicked on it and held down with my finger, tapping the download button and saving it to my phone as the very first fucking thing because, genuinely, and I mean genuinely , I was worried that somehow someway it would just disappear from these messages as a whole. Hell, I couldn’t even see it clearly, but best believe as soon as I made sure it was locked in on my photos app permanently , I clicked on the image itself to enlarge it to full screen.

And what Isiah had sent me was… I mean…

For about one entire second, I just took it the hell in.

I mean, for one good, long fucking second, I fixated on every last single detail of this photo, my eyes literally glued to my phone screen.

Isiah was lying back at an angle, propped up by some pillows leaning against his headboard, with my hoodie on him. I could only see his chin and lower which, while I would’ve complained because Isiah was literally the most beautiful person and it hadn’t even dawned on me that I didn’t have nearly enough photos of him in my camera roll… what he sacrificed that perfect face to get a better angle of made me switch my phone to my right hand so my left could immediately get to work.

My sweatshirt was oversized to the max on him, but that free hand- the one not holding his phone for this picture- was instead holding the bottom edge of the hoodie. The sleeves weren’t rolled up for this photo; however, I could fucking feel my mouth salivating at how his hand was hidden by the longer material- his fingers inside the fabric gripped the hem and tugged it down a bit, covering up a part of him that had visibly dampened a bit of the sweater.

Whatever lighting this was taken in made my heartbeat just send in an inquiry to end the agony now, because the way my cock hardened instantly at this- at Isiah- could not be anywhere near safe.

The warm yellow lighting made his skin look like it was coated in pure fucking gold .

And my fucking god , the skin that was exposed to me- his legs stretching further down his bed- had me stroking my length fast, like at any moment, this shit blessing my phone screen was actually going to vanish. I branded the entire image behind my retinas just in case.

His legs were completely bare and exposed, slightly bent to complement the way he was resting on the pillows, but what almost had me lose whatever shred I had left of my sanity was the fact that the sides of the hoodie weren’t as low as the part he had pulled down slightly to cover up his leaking cock.

The sides were up higher, showing me sneak peeks of the side profiles to those bare, unbelievably sculpted thighs and a bit of his ass.

The way this image felt like the most enthralling tease I had ever fucking seen made me actually just want to say screw it, put clothes back on, and get my car keys. And I would’ve done it in a heartbeat if I weren’t also thinking about how this weekend was going to give us an opportunity to truly be alone together- sharing the same bed for two entire nights.

Whatever choices I made now would directly influence my chance of getting that experience, and it took a good long while to try and communicate that reasoning from my brain to my body.

I didn’t even know how to handle this, though, my breath becoming a labored, hot fucking mess at simply the sight of Isiah like this, teasing the almighty fuck outta me… but I knew that just this… it wasn’t going to be enough.

Like at all.

So I clicked out of the photo, stroking my length a bit faster as I navigated to the call button. And on maybe like the 3rd ring, Isiah answered.

“H-Hello?”

Jesus fucking Christ.

Jesus. Fucking. Christ.

His voice alone turned me the fuck on even more.

“I-Isiah…” I practically whispered. My voice didn’t sound even remotely like my own any longer, but my words were hasty and all too fucking direct as I added, “L-Let’s FaceTime.”

Isiah’s breaths got instantly more laboured through the line as he answered maybe a second later with a soft yet raspy, “O-Okay.”

I was already shifting further up to my headboard after letting go of my now damn near painfully hard dick, full on slick with my precum. There were no shits left to give about the angles or how I’d hold my phone up during all this. I just snatched my wireless earbuds off the bedside table and fumbled with getting the case open before placing both pods in my ear.

This call… it was definitely going to need earbuds.

Once the devices paired, however, that was when I heard Isiah quietly cussing, far too faint for me to understand initially until he said “I-I-I’m sorry- sh-shit- my mum and dad just got home, th-they’re calling me-”

Isiah was a frazzled wreck into the line, and shit, so was I.

“I-It’s okay,” I tried to reply. Like, I did reply, but at the same time, my mind was so far gone, all I could’ve done in that moment was pray that I sounded far less turned the complete fucking hell on than I currently was.

“I-I-I-… I’m so-”

“I-Isiah,” I whispered more gently now. “I-It’s… It’s okay…”

And, see, I had meant to just leave it at that. Maybe say goodbye and let my handsome boyfriend chat with his lovely parents…

But what led me to Tokyo drifting this SUV down 3rd Street to the school the following morning?

Well, that was his last request before we hung up the phone. Before the last of my sanity truly flew the coop.

“I-I’ll wash the hoodie tonight. I… I sort of-… I… I leaked-…” Isiah cut himself off right then and there for a moment, refusing to fully admit what caused that stain in the photo. “C-Can you maybe wear it during the school day tomorrow? I just… I want it to smell like you again. Just like you… a-a-and yes, I-… I know how clingy that makes me sound.”

Man, my heart damn near ascended into the high fucking heavens at that. That particular request.

Aaaaaand this… this was how I now managed to get to school with enough time to bring Isiah exactly what I spent about an hour meticulously packing last night after our phone call.

I didn’t care how fucking clingy Isiah thought this made him; I wanted that man to be a stage 10 fucking clinger. Like the way this had my whole body giddy as all hell? Let’s just say the folks that skipped out on getting here this early in the morning avoided any possible unexpected collisions because I damn near took like eight people out between the sprint from the student parking lot right up to my locker.

And as soon as I caught sight of Isiah leaning against said locker, my heartbeat only aimed for new records. He glanced up from his phone at me, a smile quickly forming across his perfect face, and in his hand was the hoodie I recognized as the Galway one, as he held it out for me to take.

“Good mo-”

That’s about as much as he got out, watching me advance him at lightning speeds, before I reached out for the buckle of his jeans and yanked him towards me, crash landing my lips on his in an instant.

While I was very aware that Isiah and I weren’t the only two people in this school right now, nor even in this hallway, I absolutely didn’t give a single shit anymore. It was most definitely Isiah who made sure I didn’t take things any further because I was already starting to back him up against my locker, my lips moving against his soft ones hard as all hell as my free hand tilted him up by his jaw to access even more of him right the fuck away.

When I felt him break the kiss, I very, very audibly voiced my protest with the most immature whine I hadn’t released since my early glory days between the years of six and twelve. If Isiah wanted to see a whole tantrum next, I could make that happen.

“D-D-Dyl-” Isiah stuttered his way through, and when I did finally pull away, I could see in real time just how utterly flustered Isiah’s face was. His whole body, really, and it- he… he had no fucking business looking this goddamn sexy .

None at all.

But alas, this guy managed to distract me successfully enough when he took one massive step back and pointed to the brown stapled paper bag I was holding, the one I had managed to hold to the side by its handles so I could feel Isiah’s entire body flush against mine for that kiss.

“Wh-What’s…. What’s in there?” He asked me. There was every bit of curiosity mixed in with the roughness of what that unexpected kiss did to him, as I tried to process his question. I could only watch as he did his best to readjust his deep blue jeans because that growing bulge was giving him away. Fast .

Instead, I found myself setting both the stapled bag and my backpack on the carpeted floor for a second before I reached for the freshly washed hoodie Isiah now had clutched in his right arm. He handed it over easily, allowing me to pull off my light jacket, tossing it on top of my backpack, and put the hoodie on over the basic shirt I had worn for today, because I already knew what Isiah wanted.

A hoodie that smelt like me .

Then I reached down and picked up the stapled bag to hand to Isiah, who stared at it questionably but still pulled back the sides so he could carefully separate the paper and staples.

“These,” I continued, gesturing to the bag Isiah was now assessing, “are four more hoodies. One for each day of the school week, including the Galway hoodie that I will be returning by E.O.D. so you can wear it again.” I had to lean in closer to say this next part because I knew Isiah would genuinely murder me otherwise. “Knowing I’m wearing the hoodie you had to wash because you came on it and still want it to smell like me, has absolutely given me a rather permanent hard on.”

I zipped through that damn admission with not a stutter in sight, which was how Isiah knew that I meant fucking business this morning.

“So here’s how we’re doing this,” I carried on. “I put together a rotation. You choose the days you want to rotate out; however, I get whichever hoodie you had to wash, to wear for the day at school, so it has my scent. Plan ahead for weekends if you know we won’t be seeing each other.”

Isiah’s face was turning a deeper and deeper shade of red with every word, but he didn’t offer up any protests as he held my intense eye contact, as well as held that paper bag even closer to him- securely .

“I was going to include a bottle of my cologne in this bag… but your instructions were very clear. You want this to smell just like me. And that means not just my cologne but my shampoo, my lotion, my aftershave… everything . So this is my solution. And plus, this is a job for your caring boyfriend, not a cologne bottle.”

Isiah’s face was now resembling the cherry red Ferrari 458 Italia that had been on my vision board since I could practically walk.

Color #D40000 to be exact.

Same model and color as the Ferrari Hot Wheels Carson had bought me forever ago, which was right at home on the top shelf of my dresser with the rest of my belongings that mattered the most. And while my father may have forgotten, I was still in the works to convince him to buy the real thing. His only opposition eight years ago was to have us table this conversation until I could drive…

And, well, that time was now upon us, much to his unavoidable dismay.

“H-H-Has anyone-… has-… h-has anyone ever told you that y-you’re so fucking Virgo coded it’s insane?”

“ You ,“ I returned with a grin. “ You have . And I already searched up our compatibility literal eons ago with you being a Taurus. We’re the most compatible, so I’m perfectly fine with living in my complete truth, Isiah.“

Isiah finally broke our gaze, fully pulling his eyes away from mine as I watched that face of his get even redder, something I didn’t know was still possible at this point. Even the tips of his ears.

“Y-You’ve looked it up, too… haven’t you, Isiah? “ I questioned as my tone got substantially lower, resulting in Isiah now refusing to look back at me, all while his face got even more red, spreading well past his neck and down to some of his chest.

I didn’t even have the time to press him on this, because we both heard the sound of the first bell ringing straight through this hallway, and knew we had better get a move on to make it to Zinfel’s class for first period.

The last thing Isiah had done, however, before forcing me to march on, even though I was literally riding this high out at full capacity- first gifting Isiah these hoodies, then watching him quickly pull one over his head while I set my light jacket in my locker and switched out textbooks- was reach up on the very tips of his toes, and plant the softest kiss on my cheek rather unexpectedly.

“Th-Thank you,” I heard him whisper near me while he pulled away, before holding up the paper bag to pinpoint exactly what he was thanking me for.

All I replied with after giving him a nod, drawing me closer and leaning down right near his left ear to quietly whisper, “the-… the next time you stain one… I

• I want a picture, Isiah .“

And there was no stopping the quiet fucking whimper Isiah released in response to that, as his hands shot up to grip the sleeves of the sweater I now wore- the one he couldn’t help but leak onto the night before.

The rest of the week went by as slow as Isiah and I predicted.

The only saving grace was literally the fact that Isiah followed my detailed instructions to a T.

He wore a new hoodie each day… and I received two photos during the week showing me exactly, in very vivid detail, the mess he created before he had to wash some of them.

Unfortunately, there was no phone sex that followed those photos, thanks to all the homework he and I were completing so this weekend would happen without any interruptions whatsoever, but I took that disappointment in stride.

And when Friday finally, finally came along, I rushed us through the school day so damn fast, one would think I became the freaking principal with how meticulous I was getting on cutting down time.

Isiah and I had owned our bragging rights for the week because by fourth period on Tuesday, we were handed news that we had already predicted for our science project.

100%. A perfect score.

And we immediately leant into said bragging rights. At this point, all our teachers and classmates were sick of our shit because the average for our class with that project was a pitiful 75%.

Amateur percentages if you asked either me or this handsome lad I got to call mine .

The real treat wasn’t even the score, however.

That came as Isiah packed up his duffel bag for our weekend trip into the trunk of my dad’s SUV, and I got to do the honors of driving us to Wilmoria’s first once school finally let out, with this visit being a whole surprise for Micah.

He was the very first one to notice us enter the deliciously smelling café after I parked, and as soon as he caught sight of Isiah and me from the counter, he beelined it straight for us.

“ Shut the actual fuck up …“ 

I watched a large smile spread across his relaxing yet distinct features as he opened up those long, defined, and surely flour-coated arms for some warm embraces. It was hard not to thoroughly miss every last bit of the energy he brought this lovely place… and all the incredible recipes he carried in that sharp noggin of his. 

“The prodigal sons have returned!”

••

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/69b137a57c43828392f0fabfe31c94a5c2abd075/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6874346754355f70644c684855413d3d2d313539343937373335372e3138383161356434393830656664333931343632313432393830352e6a7067)

48. Wilmoria’s Café - A Quick Pit Stop

Just a little interlude (4k words lol) chappy chap before I give y’all straight smut next chapter

Stay tuned until the end of this chapter for more character aesthetics from Wilmoria’s :)

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Isiah

At this point, there was no fucking way in hell I was making it through this relationship alive.

Between the gifted hoodies and Dylan’s request that came with it, I was without a doubt fucked for the indefinite future.

I mean, this handsome fucker was doing it all. From stealing a rather unprovoked kiss first thing every morning- well, he’d probably argue it was provoked from how often his heated gaze landed on me in every single class we shared- to making sure every single lunch we had together on those bleachers this week was completely uninterrupted… I was losing it.

I was one hundred percent losing it.

All while falling madly in love with every single minute of said madness.

I mean, I didn’t think I could take this simping to new heights, but every day without fail, I made sure Dylan saw me in his sweatshirts. I made sure he received them after each wash, as well as received a… a photo along with them when… when I…

He was dead fucking serious about this rotation I very quickly adapted into my schedule, and I had to admit that he made this week so much more fucking bearable for me.

He gave me each day to look forward to, along with the lunches he was making that were becoming more and more personalized, as if they weren’t already.

Tuesday was some of the incredible leftovers from dinner on Monday.

Wednesday was Irish Vegetable Stew because he claimed he wanted to make absolutely certain I had zero chances of getting sick before this weekend, even though I was still concerned that he might actually drop dead from his allergies during the weekend. And that wholesome meal was paired with a vitamin C medley of a drink I instantly recognized as his father’s recipe.

Thursday was a salad with lean chicken breast, lightly salted with a shit ton of paprika, and a side of potato salad.

And Friday was one of my favorites: chili with extra cheese and diced jalapeños on the side.

Dylan saw all this as nothing, explaining to me that his dad did it all the time- making lunches for Carson and him… but I wanted him to understand that I-… that this meant more than just something he casually did. Him cooking for me- it had me brainstorming what I could do for him over this weekend to show that I loved it. I loved everything about him… however Virgo coded this man seriously fucking was.

By the time Friday rolled around, I was so ready to get the hell out of dodge, all I felt was happiness that Dylan was on a similar mission. The one place we weren’t, under any circumstances, missing, was Wilmoria’s.

Seeing Mickey, or Mic as we liked to interchange, was a non-negotiable.

He had started working at Wilmoria’s when he was fifteen, right around Carson’s birthday and only a few months after Dylan had shown up at his dad’s doorstep, with Pricilla taking him under her wing and in her literal home.

His mother was a close friend of Pricilla and had to leave for Korea due to some issues with the extended family, eventually deciding to settle there in her home country. His father soon joined her, but Mickey remained here for school since it was easiest for his academics.

Mickey was completing- well, completed , now that he officially graduated- his engineering degree, which was actually far more complex than he ever let on to anyone really… he was majoring in aerospace engineering, one of the tougher subcategories, but only a select few knew that, like Dylan and me.

And our attachment to that secretly massive brain of his showed, even if he had almost five years on us to begin with.

“ Shut the actual fuck up ,“ Were the first words Mickey led with, making both me and Dylan grin wide from the warmest welcome we’d probably ever get with this overworked genius. He only worked that charm with paying customers, and Dylan and I always got things on the house. “The prodigal sons have returned!”

Mickey then pulled us into some of the most bone-crushing hugs, taking after his boss Pricilla- or as most called her around here, CiCi- and all ten thousand tons of force she had in that shorter frame of hers, before releasing us both.

Dylan himself surprised me with his response while we took our seats at our usual table near the door. “Good to see ya man,” he grinned wide, “and I’m not going to precursor this, or beat around the bush here, or anything… but I wanna get this established right away because I will be showing my boyfriend all the affection now that we’re out of school for the weekend… but you should know that boyfriend is Isiah.”

Mickey just stared at us both a moment, his thick apron wrapped tightly around his waist as his muscular arms crossed over his broad chest. Every single year, he seemed to bulk up more, even while putting in long hours at a café.

If this were my place of work, I wouldn’t look even remotely similar to this.

More like a Snorlax, really.

I think the most exciting part about this guy was that… well, you honestly never knew what was coming next. Mickey liked to keep you fully on your toes, and this afternoon was about to prove exactly that.

“E!” Mickey called out suddenly, damn near launching Dylan’s and my own hearts from our bodies at the sheer sudden sound of his direct voice.

Eve exited the back room, passing the counter to join us in the sitting area not even a second later. Her distinct green hair and deep, richly tinted skin were unmissable, but so was that stoic expression that seemed to never leave her unless Mickey was involved.

He truly did get on every last nerve of hers… but she still loved him. Everyone at this café did considering he was the reason business had been incredible for the last seven years.

“What?” She deadpanned, crossing her own arms over her chest.

“Who made the first move?” Mickey was abrupt with his question for us, as he turned back to face me and this handsome guy across from me, and I could feel how taken aback Dylan was by the sudden interrogation… so I spoke up instead.

“Uh, I guess that would be me?” I offered this baker.

Then I had to join Dylan in the immense confusion when Mickey suddenly uncrossed his own arms and stuck his hand up over his shoulders, not bothering to even look at Eve, before ordering, “Pay up, babygirl.”

The irritated look on Eve’s face said it all while she pivoted to Mickey’s side. “ Type A ,“ she shot back quickly under her breath, but I still saw her reach into the back of her jeans for something.

“ Know it all ,“ he countered, delivering that comeback with just as much speed, and locked eyes with Eve.

“Slow your roll, Mic, we got a parlay,” Eve seemed to remind him, removing her hand from her back pocket before those light yet sharp brown eyes turned themselves on my boyfriend. “Who said I love you first?”

Dylan and I now fully didn’t understand what any of this was about… but it was Mic and Eve… so I felt like we were just going to have to roll with it. “That would… that would be me,” I explained aloud, to which Mickey immediately cursed under his breath.

“What the complete hell , Dylan?” He countered sharply at Dylan, making Eve unexpectedly chuckle while he dug deep into his back pocket for his wallet. This just sent Dylan and me deeper into the abyss of pure confusion.

“…You… had bets running?” Dylan questioned, still figuring this all out.

“Yes, you fucker . And I saw the potential in you, considering who your dad is, but here you are-” Mickey dished out a few 20’s from his wallet next, “letting me down and shit.”

Dylan didn’t even get the chance to say anything, because one more soul soon joined us out here from the back room of the café, all while Dylan and I tried to process this… and it was Arlo.

“Collecting?” He asked in that soft, gentle voice of his. I swear his voice always took me by surprise, taking into account his height and far more rigid features. Handsome for sure, but a resting bitch face at best. “And where the hell’s Trin?”

“Yep. Dylan just admitted it,” Mickey replied as he turned his head back slightly to the taller man. Arlo quickly whipped his head over to Dylan and me, peering over Eve and Mickey’s shoulders. “And she’s late as shit. As always.”

“Don’t forget the parlay, Mic,” Arlo was quick with, “and who told scary Don you liked the other?” He then asked my boyfriend and me. That took Dylan and I a sec to answer, but I found myself eventually chiming in once again.

“I mean… I sort of admitted it to Carson first while I was drunk… and he probably told Don… so… I guess… me?” I offered. The feeling that this was going to ruin Mickey’s day was proven right not a second later.

Mickey dropped to his knees immediately, placing his head in his slightly floured left hand before shaking it side to side.

“Dylan?” I heard him mutter, while both he and Eve stuck out their hand to pass some bills of cash onto Arlo. I could see a sly grin playing on Arlo’s lips, which let me know he had definitely won the parlay.

“…Y-Yes?” Dylan replied.

“ Step it up ,“ Mickey replied, raising his head a second later to look dead at my boyfriend. “I was… I was betting real money on you, a Whittaker- a Dwyer , and you let Isiah just one up you like this?”

“If it helps,” I replied for both myself and this handsome guy who was still about as confused as I was, “he does accost me at every single moment, so the feelings are pretty… mutual?”

“Of course I do,” Dylan replied, all matter-of-fact, turning his head back to me. “Have you seen you?”

And while his words sent me into a whole ass gay panic, knocking whatever wind I had in me… it was Mickey, that glimmer in his eyes and his next choice of words, that made me try to pull it together harder.

“Alright,” he proclaimed, lifting himself off the hardwood floors before swiveling back to Eve and Arlo. “New bets. 6 PM Eastern, with or without Trin. Parlays are off the fucking table.”

“But Mic ,” Eve whined with a swiftness, yet Mickey firmly shook his head no.

“I don’t trust these little shits anymore,” he waved a hand back our way. “Looks like they’re just doing any fucking thing in the dating department.”

“Were…” Dylan started, his voice trailing off for a second. “Were we… were we that, um… like… obvious? L-Like that- that we liked-”

“Yes,” Mickey replied in an instant. “Now enough about that, you’re rubbing salt in a fresh wound, kid. I’m out a smooth $200 thanks to you. Tell me about the last year instead-” this bold baker then shifted that gaze to me. “- both of you. I want details on this development before I put any more money down.”

And I couldn’t help but look down at the white table between Dylan and me.

“I, uh…” I started, not sure how to even begin to explain this- us

• but it was Dylan chiming in that threw me off completely.

“The trip was great, but the time apart from Isiah was what sucked. Bad . And just like you’ve avoided speaking on the one and only year you were forced to play baseball for in tenth grade and pulled a muscle in your groin, resulting in physical therapy, I’m choosing to opt out of speaking on what was the lowest year of my life from hereon. That work for you, Mr. Jackson?”

Mickey just stared at Dylan a moment… as did fucking I, because-…

Because… well… Dylan was actually very serious right now. We never brought up the groin-pulling incident unless we meant business.

Then I saw Dylan slowly turn his head my way, and he extended that arm of his above the table, waiting patiently for me to place my hand in his open palm, which I immediately did, making him smile a quite literally dazzling smile… and fuck it, I didn’t know how to act anymore.

I never did when I was around him… but this?

The strong sharpness in his tone? And at Mickey of all people… over my shitty mistake this last year, of all things…

He was turning my brain into ground-up dust. Making my heart do things that forewarned me of what might happen this weekend if I didn’t show some restraint. Some decorum. And because I wanted our first time together to be perfect , I needed some time to make sure it absolutely was. I couldn’t just act on how I felt, all on a whim like that.

Mickey surprised us yet again by the soft chuckle he released, easing all the tension immediately. “ Lover boy. My odds are good, then,“ he whispered low to Dylan, making Dylan start to smile.

“ Know. It. All ,“ Dylan whispered back, but those fierce, darkening eyes of his didn’t leave me.

If it wasn’t for the next voice we heard… I was pretty sure Dylan was going to find a way to reach my lips with his, regardless of the table between us. But the voice that followed had Dylan and I turning our heads to look past Mickey and his knowing smile.

“Aunty CiCi!” Dylan grinned now, smiling even wider at the older woman who was muttering “ move move move move move “ to her employees so she could part them like the Red Sea to get to us.

“Mickey, stop teasing these kids . Also, where the hell is Trin? And what’s this I hear about bets in my caf-” she started, before her eyes eventually fell on us… Then they zig-zagged back and forth between Dylan and I fast. “W-What… what the hell-”

“… Oh ,” Eve interjected in a quiet tone. “One’s got shaved sides and ear piercings. The other’s a giant. Didn’t notice before.”

This was all said as more of a statement, and the only reason Dylan and I didn’t even bat an eyelash at it was because it was Eve. Apparently, whatever bets they had, had these employees overlooking pretty much every physical change between Dylan and myself.

But as I looked between Arlo, Eve, and Mickey, I was instantly reminded that all three had a look so individual to them and their personalities that physical changes probably meant absolutely nothing. And honestly? It was comforting.

“I, um… I also got some tats,” I added, because of all the people that had seen me after Dylan got back from Ireland… this lot right here gave about as little fucks as Derek did. Eve and Mickey alone had their fair share of tattoos and piercings.

“Tats?” Pricilla asked curiously.

“Oo, let me see,” Eve added. “If you need touch-ups, I got a friend named Jade flying in from Cali few weeks from now. Setting up a new shop. She’s great.”

“My guy’s better,” Mickey countered.

“Your guy’s in jail,” Arlo reminded him, causing Mickey to swear lightly under his breath.

“ So that’s where that fucker is ,“ he muttered more to himself.

I dutifully reached down for the hem of the sweater I was wearing today- one of Dylan’s- to pull it up over my head so this group could see the tats visible past the short sleeves of my t-shirt. It forced me to let go of Dylan’s hand in the process, but I was planning to reach for it again right after.

Us being affectionate at school was one thing… but being out like this in public was doing things to me. Glorious things.

“Oh, nice!” Mickey grinned wider, making me smile more myself. “You two been bulking up, huh?”

He pointed to my sculpted arms, and I felt my face heating up a little. The mistake was glancing over at Dylan, who, in return, had the most wicked smirk playing on his lips. It sent a shiver straight through me, which this guy absolutely caught, judging by that smirk growing.

“Something like that,” he then answered Mickey for us, not sparing a single fraction of my fucking heart with the look he gave me in the process.

Our time at Wilmoria’s was both the best wave of nostalgia, but also unfortunately pretty short since Dylan’s dads wanted us at the cabin before it got too dark out, and it was definitely getting darker earlier and earlier as we moved towards the colder months.

I was still really happy we stopped by, though. Knowing damn near the entire café had some sort of bets placed on Dylan and I dating was actually insane work on those employees’ part, but the confidence Mickey and that crew must’ve had to make an entire parlay was seriously wild.

I was so stunned by it, I didn’t even have time to react to the fact that Mic had his money on Dylan saying something first.

But like… then again… Dylan had always been nothing shy of blunt and hella fucking direct, and so was Mickey, so in some way it kinda made sense.

“Mickey being back full-time feels so good. I almost cried tasting his caramel apple sheet cake today. I know he won’t submit it as his recipe for their annual holiday contest because, in his words, it encapsulates autumn and not winter … but seriously, my fucking god was that absolutely delicious.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle, my body feeling all sickly gooey from both the left hand I had placed over Dylan’s right, which was resting on my thigh as we drove through beautiful fall scenery towards this cabin, and the perfect hot chocolate I was holding in my right.

I loved Pricilla’s classic hot chocolate, but Eve had snuck in a pump of pumpkin spice syrup when Pricilla wasn’t looking, just how I liked it. Arlo also snuck extra whipped cream in Dylan’s before his to-go lid went on, because it was a must that Pricilla never knew we made alterations to what was her specialty.

“Dylan,” I spoke in a gentle tone, “you did cry. You also had us pack like 6 more cake slices to-go.” I then pointed to the paper bag filled with desserts that was resting at my feet. “It’s okay, though. I understand, love. I truly do.”

Dylan whipped his head over at me for a moment, and I thought he was running to his own defense for his show of emotions, but when a massive grin started to form on his lips, he definitely lost me.

“You should call me that more often,” he replied.

“Dylan?” I questioned.

“ Love ,“ he clarified, making me turn my head back towards the passenger side window in hopes he didn’t see how red my face was getting…

…How red it was about to get with what I was about to say next…

“I-… I-I will if… if you, um… call me baby mo-”

“ Deal ,“ Dylan shot back quick as all hell, giving my upper thigh a firm squeeze and just demanding from me the most cheesy smile that I had to turn even further away from him to try and conceal.

My heart hadn’t been beating normally since god knows when, but I was grateful that Dylan somewhat spared me from further embarrassment by quickly jumping into what he and I thought Derek was cooking up for the comic expo next fall, a topic that was far safer for my health than talking about pet names for each other…

But then my heart rate went up all the fuck over again once we finally pulled onto a dirt road surrounded by thick evergreen trees, leading us up to our new home for the weekend.

Molly had already made it here with Helen, and as Dylan parked his SUV up next to Helen’s Jeep, the first thing out of his mouth was, “Molly has lost her fucking mind.”

These two girls in light, fall jackets were unpacking cases of beer from the trunk of Helen’s Jeep.

“Dylan! Isiah!” Molly grinned as my boyfriend and I started to climb out of our own transportation, Dylan heading around towards the trunk so he could grab our duffel bags while I gathered up our empty hot chocolate cups and all the desserts Dylan had insisted we get.

“There is no way we need this much beer, Molly,” my handsome boyfriend said immediately. “Oh. And hi, Helen,” he then added in a much kinder voice, making me chuckle. He said it in the cadence as Johnny said “Oh hi mark” in The Room.

And I couldn’t help myself as I whispered to him, joining him at his side to say, “I did not hit her, it’s not true, it’s bullshit, I did not hit her… I did not,” and Dylan immediately busted out laughing. Then I turned to the two girls as they were grabbing their suitcases from the back next. “And hi Molly, hi Helen.”

I found it funny that Molly had a crush on Helen, considering Helen’s whole vibe was pretty grunge, while Molly reminded me of a mixture between Blossom and Bubbles from The Powerpuff Girls

Blossom because Molly loved pink, and Bubbles because Molly was a certified crashout just like that little blonde haired blue eyed devil.

Regardless, she and Helen were all laughs already, and seemed like they were pretty excited about this weekend together.

“Hi Dylan, hi Isiah,” Helen gave us both a smile. “Thanks for coming up this weekend, my parents already got the cabin ready for us last weekend, but we under no circumstances can touch their liquor cabinet… hence the beer-”

“And the wine,” Molly added, pulling out two large bottles from the back of the Jeep next.

“Molly, if I’m stuck at any point in this trip holding your hair back while you upchuck your internal organs into a toilet bowl… I will never speak to you again,” Dylan spoke seriously, but Molly simply laughed it off.

Yeah… this was going to be a weekend for the books.

“And remember, sitting in a hot tub dehydrates you. So yes, I will be forcing H2O down your throat,” Dylan added. “Right now, however, Isiah and I are going to take first pick on our room… rooms,” this handsome man then had to add that on quickly, thanks to the promise we made Molly.

“Aren’t you two dating?” Helen asked. “Separate rooms seems a bit… odd.”

“ Doesn’t it? “ Dylan asked, giving Molly a rather pointed look, to which I saw her activate her puppy dog eyes in an instant, silently pleading with this guy to stay on script here. “I guess Isiah and I like to have our space…”

I almost rolled my eyes at that excuse, seeing how much of a lie that fucking was… but Molly turned those puppy dog eyes on me lightning fast, and I held my tongue in solidarity with this goofy girl.

“You don’t mind sharing with Molly, right?” Dylan then asked Helen, and she quickly shook her head no, that paler complexion of hers getting a bit rosier.

“Perfect!” My boyfriend explained, gesturing with both our bags in hand for me to lead the way. “Isiah and I might be busy for a little while with… unpacking… so try not to interrupt us.” That last part was directed fully at Molly, but both she and Helen gave us a nod, with Molly looking extra guilty while Dylan gently nudged me forward towards the cabin.

I could already hear his impatience in his voice… but it just made my heart beat all the damn harder, knowing exactly what unpacking was about to entail.

And I got moving with just as much impatience as was in that hot-as-shit tone of his.

We were finally going to get some actual alone time after being in the fight of our lives this whole week, anticipating these exact moments. And if we were interrupted just one more time, Dylan was going to give crashout Molly here a run for her money.

••

Please enjoy some more character aesthetics for the characters introduced in this chapter :)

~

ᴍɪᴄᴀʜ ᴊᴀᴄᴋꜱᴏɴ (ᴍɪᴄᴋᴇʏ) ᴀɢᴇ: 22 ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ: ꜰᴇʙʀᴜᴀʀʏ 29ᴛʜ (ʟᴇᴀᴘ ʏᴇᴀʀ) ᴢᴏᴅɪᴀᴄ: ᴘɪꜱᴄᴇꜱ ♓︎

┗━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━┛ —

ᴘʀɪᴄɪʟʟᴀ ᴅɪʟʟᴏɴ (ᴄɪᴄɪ) ᴀɢᴇ: 46 ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ: ᴏᴄᴛᴏʙᴇʀ 15ᴛʜ ᴢᴏᴅɪᴀᴄ: ʟɪʙʀᴀ ♎︎

┗━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━┛ —

ᴇᴠᴇʟʟ ʟɪɴᴅᴇʟʟ (ᴇᴠᴇ) ᴀɢᴇ: 28 ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ: ᴀᴘʀɪʟ 1ꜱᴛ ᴢᴏᴅɪᴀᴄ: ᴀʀɪᴇꜱ ♈︎

┗━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━┛ —

ᴄᴀʀʟᴏꜱ ᴊɪᴍᴇɴᴇᴢ (ᴀʀʟᴏ) ᴀɢᴇ: 27 ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ: ᴀᴜɢᴜꜱᴛ 8ᴛʜ ᴢᴏᴅɪᴀᴄ: ʟᴇᴏ ♌︎

┗━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━┛ —

49. First We Need To Break It In

Triple upload today if the time allows!

Also my dumbass got me locked out of my Google account so these chapters are

completely

raw (it logged me out of everything associated with my Google account including fucking Grammarly- ughhhhhhh)

Also also, I have a AITA question: there was a writer on here who was putting out gay books completely written by AI without detailing that and I called them out on their page for it. Looks like they deleted their whole profile and now I wanna know whether I’m the asshole for it. I knew it was AI because they had their first book uploaded here that was a completely different writing style (clearly they wrote that one), and now I feel conflicted. But also like… that’s such a slap in the face for authors who are actually writing their own shit. Idk. Let me know, thanks!

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Dylan

I meant every fucking word to Molly about leaving Isiah and I alone for a bit. She was free to use that alone time with Helen however she saw fit… but I was one hundred percent breaking in our room of choice with my boyfriend.

The other room was going to be a landing site for our bags or whatever, but Isiah sure as shit was sleeping with me.

After the pain brought on by having to go an entire school week with our only alone time being the bleachers, Isiah was about to find out shortly just how much I had wanted this with him.

I wanted his perfect, soft lips on mine stat.

I wanted his velvety smooth skin damn near merged with my own…. Which made my comment to Helen about Isiah and I needing our space all the more fucking ridiculous…

Because I had plans to fall asleep after being intimate with him, every night, and plans to wake him up every morning we were here for with at least my lips fucking somewhere on him.

I also had plans to take every shower together, which he’d soon find out about, and honestly, from just how little space Isiah was about to have, my lie to Helen was very, very quickly going to fall apart.

But alas, Molly was pleading, begging me with her puppy dog eyes, and it was the best I could come up with on the spot.

I had sort of agreed to insane girl’s ask before Isiah and I had gone fully public, but now that we were, of course Helen already knew.

At this point, after our stop at Wilmoria’s, I was convinced everyone in the tri-state area fucking knew.

Regardless, my lack of fucks to give was showing as I ushered Isiah inside the surprisingly spacious cabin, nudging him up the stairs with these bags in tow after he set the bag of sheet cake slices in the kitchen so we could give each available room a once over. And the one we chose in record time was the third one because it was located the farthest from the wooden stairs leading down to the main area of the home, and there was a walkout balcony connected to this one, overlooking the back of the cabin, right out into the forest.

I threw our duffel bags in the smallest room right away because I still had somewhat of a heart not to have Molly tough it out with Helen in there, but after that, Isiah was swiftly whisked away to the room we would be sharing for two whole nights.

“D-Dylan-” Isiah stammered, chuckling lightly as he fully allowed himself to be dragged in here- fully allowing this current kidnapping to occur. If I had it my way, I wouldn’t have had us leave this room for this entire trip, but I could feel it coming. Molly was going to insist we at least do some activities together.

I noticed there was a bonfire in the backyard once Isiah and I got a view of it from the balcony, then the hot tub Molly mentioned was directly below us, right next to the deck on the first level. I used the short time Isiah and I spent on the balcony, checking it out, to give my dad a quick call and let him know we made it, and both us and his car was still in one piece.

He told me to have fun this weekend, and of course to call if I need him for anything at all, but I could hear Carson in the background telling him to tell me that he loves me, before telling my dad to hurry it the fuck up before they miss their dinner reservations, and my dad was forced to hang up shortly after.

This whole place was actually really, really nice… and courtesy of Helen, Molly had earned herself extra brownie points for inviting us out.

However chaotic that invite was at the time.

But that didn’t make me hesitate even the slightest bit to firmly close and lock that bedroom door as soon as I got Isiah through it, pressing his back flush against the now closed door before I let go of his right hand with my left so I could use it to tilt his head up towards me.

Isiah was the one that surprised me as he pushed himself up on the balls of his feet and brought his lips quickly to mine. I felt one of his arms wrap themselves quickly around my neck, pulling me down a little and pressing my lips harder on him, but that free hand reached for my other arm still wrapped and his waist, and pushed it lower, forcing my hand from his waist directly down to his ass.

His lips felt fucking heavenly . I felt him shiver against me when I gripped his ass hard, coercing the most perfect fucking whimper from him, which only fueled this quickly heating kiss further. My body reacted to him so damn fast, I genuinely stumbled backwards as I felt Isiah pushing against me, backing us up towards the direction of the bed.

And the only time I was forced to break this kiss was when I fell back unexpectedly onto said mattress, Isiah giving me about one second to gather myself before he climbed on top with those toned, strong legs straddling my waist.

His breathing was hard, and yet he still lowered himself down on me, about to bring those lips back to mine if it wasn’t for the fact that my hands had located the hem of my sweatshirt he was wearing, and I was starting to straight yank the thing off him, his undershirt included.

During this week, I had been dreaming about seeing him in just my clothes… but right now, I needed to see and touch skin. Bare fucking skin.

And I definitely sent the sweatshirt flying somewhere in an effort to obtain that. More of him.

“ F-F-Fuck- Isiah ,“ I stammered out this time as soon as I saw his bare upper body. I reached up, fully ready to fucking touch him, my dick practically begging for more, but Isiah’s shaky hands had gripped the hem of my own hoodie before he started shimmying the thing off me.

I sat up right then and there, right at the edge of the bed so he could completely get it off, and I sure as shit had zero clue where the hell that went at all.

I was too busy trying to register Isiah pushing me right back onto my back, with me feeling the plush mattress below it again. “ D-D-Dylan -“ he murmured with a rawness in his voice as he pinned me back onto this bed, grabbing hold of both my forearms and pressing them into the mattress on either side of my head…

Then he brought those lips right back to mine, and I swear to god I don’t think my stomach had ever sent such intense butterflies straight through me, bouncing off the weak stomach lining and knocking all my dominance the fuck out as those soft lips of his kissed me hard. Feverishly fucking hard, to the point that my growing moans into it had a sound level that had to have been heard past this goddamn door.

He had started to grind that lower half of his into me, ignoring the shivers cutting through his own perfect build to show me exactly how much he fucking wanted this.

And I was turning it a goddamn mess below him as my cock reminded me how long it had been since he and I could be like this. This intimate.

And Isiah… he had… he had never gotten quite like this either.

He had to break this intense kiss seconds later to literally gasp for air, me doing the same because I don’t think I was even remembering breathing existed and was still a thing once this all started. But when I felt his kisses return, starting to travel down my neck and forcing my head to tilt back into the mattress as his teeth grazed down my Adam’s apple, I started to fucking shiver on repeat.

The grip he had with pinning my arms up, only started to loosen as his kisses got rougher with each damn inch he slowly kissed down, from my neck to my chest.

This week of sexual deprivation- the lack of touching- had one hundred percent affected him too, all while here I was thinking I was the one being impatient not even like two seconds ago.

His hands had started to freely wander over the entire upper part of me- gliding his gentle hands with every bit of sinful discovery, as if this was the first time he was touching my skin. Ever .

As soon as he had reached my chest, I at least managed to lift my head off this mattress so I could see him better.

I wanted to see exactly what he was doing, and in return, I was welcomed with the most glorious sight. His tongue had slid out to first lick one of my hardened nipples, but then he captured it between his teeth gently, and my whole back arched, pushing my chest into that simple touch.

This sensation was-

There were no words to explain how good this fucking felt right now, holy fucking shit . How good he felt. “Sh-… Sh-Sh-Shit-” I stuttered, still trying to get a grip on how lost in everything he was doing, made me. His hands were taking just as much time as those lips and teeth of his were, repeating that action on one firm nipple before kissing his way across my chest to the other.

I was able to raise my arms, bringing them to him at first to maybe pull him back because I was fucking losing my mind how good he felt and looked… treating my body like this… but Isiah was only getting lower and lower on my bare, pale skin, sucking it harder and harder now, which sealed my fate about not being able to even remotely control myself.

Especially not when I saw him reach my navel and start to lower himself to his knees on the floor by the edge of the bed.

That made me put at least one arm to better use, so I could prop myself up on my elbow.

This- this was-

Isiah then managed to look up, and those eyelids of his opened up at me finally, making me grip this comforter below me so goddamn hard with the arm I was propped up on. The other hand quickly shot out into his hair, reaching him instantly as his hands made it to the buckle of my jeans.

I had wanted to taste every goddamn inch of him after Monday afternoon in my bedroom… but seeing him- watching those shaking hands start to undo my belt as his eyes raked over every bit of exposed skin I had…

I swear to fucking god I almost fucking came.

Instead I got a good grip in his hair for what was coming as I felt my belt buckle release, my top button unfasten, and my zipper pulled down, bringing his gaze back to the bulge in my pants that he was quickly freeing.

I couldn’t even tell what was falling past my lips, but I did know my throat was going to feel like I swallowed sand from how heavy I was breathing through my mouth.

Isiah looked utterly mesmerized, with his eyelids lowering a bit more once again while he managed to pull my briefs down just enough to free my cock. I was going to try and raise my hips to help him pull my jeans and briefs off it he wanted. If that was going to be more comfortable for him.

But when I watched with my own vivid intensity as Isiah’s tongue reached out to lick the fucking sticky mess I was already creating in these briefs before he pulled them down more, I made absolutely certain that I was doing nothing else besides watching his desire behind those perfect eyes- licking from my base to my tip.

Then he took my complete length in his warm mouth and that forced my hand in his hair to tighten, pulling him back a bit, and I to sit up more now.

“D-Dylan-” he murmured towards me. There was an ache- a-… a desperation in his voice, “P-Please- can I…”

“Y-Yes, baby,” I whispered back quickly, just saying fuck it to my shattering body and instead watching in real time as Isiah released another full body shudder. His face tightened, and I thought he might need a moment like I just did, but only a second later, he had lowered his head, taking my wet cock back in that hot mouth of his, and I had to force myself not to press his head even lower by the way this fucking felt.

God, I was trying to get a fucking grip on whatever I could, but Isiah didn’t waste a single minute starting to fully suck me off, and this position- him on his knees like this- I wasn’t sure what to do anymore.

Then he started to hollow his cheeks out a little and my whole body started fucking shivering.

“Sh-Shi-it- I-Is- Is-” I choked out. Everything about this was more than just intense, and the fact that Isiah removed one of his hands from my crotch to reach down in front of his, undoing his own buckle quickly, was fully sending any body function I still had somewhat control over, off a cliff.

His eyes were dead on me, and that skin of his? Jesus fucking fuck , his skin was turning a brighter shade of red, spreading all over his upper body, from his shoulder down his arms and chest. And once he managed to slip his hand into the front of his jeans, this incredible fucking blowjob got a bit sloppier.

Isiah’s face was what made me grip his hair tighter, but as he started to stroke himself, moaning, I almost collapsed back onto the fucking bed from how unexpected jolts of pleasure were damn near scraping against my nerves.

“I-I-Is-siah-” my arm muscles tightened, the one that was using itself to propped me up had that connecting hand gripping the comforter on this bed like crazy. “I-I-… I-I’m- I-… I’m g-going t-to-” Isiah’s eyelids alone were starting to lower as his face grew even more heated.

His sinful fucking moaning

• his soft, full lips spread around my dick- shit had me internally chanting to myself show some goddamn restraint… but then he just brought himself lower, pushing my cock about as far back in his mouth as it could go, and that fucking did it. The arm connected to the hand that was gripping his perfect, short, soft curls, pushed my dick to the very back of his hot mouth before my whole body spasmed unexpectedly.

I hadn’t meant to cum as hard or as much as I did, nor did I mean to push all of that down Isiah’s throat, but he didn’t pull away in the slightest when I suddenly loosened that grip, feeling I went to far. Instead he started to shake, his arm moving faster with that hand stroking his own cock…

And when his eyes shut closed, visibly coming hard while he tried to swallow the rest of my cum, I did finally collapse back onto that bed, forcing myself to look away because I could already feel my cock refusing to soften at the sight of that. His tight face. His hot mouth. His fucking moans around me with those lips stretched the thinnest…

The way my cum filled that mouth of his.

My hand quickly pulled Isiah away a bit, forcing him to release my cock, and as I felt him slowly stand before his clearly unstable body crawled back over on top of mine, using both his hands and his knees, I tilted my head back off the mattress to watch him making his way back up towards me.

It was the glossed over eyes… his burning skin… and the mess he had clearly made in his jeans by the wet spots soaking through from his black briefs to the unbuckled, unzipped, faded blue material… that was what had me flipping us over so damn fast.

I made a decision right then and there that we were going to have to limit this. Him getting like this. Him making it so damn clear how fucking badly he wanted this. Because my lack of control was almost fucking frightening, and I was about to beg him with desperation I didn’t even know I had in me, for something that we hadn’t quite talked about yet.

Actually going further.

Just right now, seconds ago, I had craved to feel more than just his mouth. I had wondered just how warm another part of him might feel, and if he was okay with it.

Hell, while there was nothing I loved more than making Isiah a stuttering, panting wreck … I knew I could only land on doing what he just did for me- that we couldn’t go further right now, not when I could already feel a disturbance coming since it was getting a bit later in the day, around five in the evening.

And yes, the disturbance did eventually come, cutting all this abruptly short… but it was from Helen surprisingly.

“Hey, guys! It’s been like an hour, and we gotta get this hike in before it gets too dark!” She called out from the main level. “The forecast said it might rain tomorrow!”

That made my head instantly fall in defeat, all while Isiah was still trying to get it together below me. My cum and his spit had made his lips all sticky and wet, making me lick my own swollen bottom lip from how he looked like this.

Looking up at me.

“W-We could just not go?” I whispered breathlessly to him. He knew what I wanted right now… but then his eyes shifted to his right where the walk out for the balcony was, and Isiah slowly shook his head.

“I-I-… I don’t… I d-don’t want th-the girls going alone.”

And I did my best to hold in the deepest of sighs, because I saw what Isiah did, and knew he was right.

It would be dark soon. And it was safer if at least one person accompanied them so they didn’t form any stupid ideas while out there.

But I still leant down and snuck in one tender, perfect kiss, making sure Isiah felt it as I tasted me on his lips, before eventually pulling away. He at least knew I wanted more, and for now, that was going to have to suffice.

••

50. Allergies. Terrible, Terrible Allergies

This is the second chapter of a double upload, with one more chapter in the works to be uploaded today!

Isiah

I knew this was a shitty idea from the moment we left the cabin.

“Isiah,” Dylan murmured near my ear. I shifted his weight gently, holding him up much easier now but making sure he was still comfortable.

Once we made it back to the cabin, I knew my racing heart would finally find some fucking calm. Right now, however, I was too focused on not dropping this giant that I was currently carrying on my back.

“I’m too heavy for this,” he tried to insist quietly, but I shook my head no near his, just picking up the pace. Honestly if I said much of anything, I myself was absolutely going to pass out.

The way this hike had gone to shit was exactly what I was fearing from the jump. From before we even drove out here. And the fact that Dylan had a reaction to something his allergy medication hadn’t helped with was undeniably eating away at him, even though this was all out of his control.

At this point, I wasn’t mad at anyone about how bad his allergies had gotten over the course of the two hours we had been hiking for, even if it was Molly and Helen’s idea to go, because had Molly and Helen gone alone then they one hundred percent would’ve gotten lost with how inaccurate the map they were using to try and find a river out here, was. Right now I was just concerned about him.

Dylan.

About me getting him back and out of these damn woods.

“I… didn’t realize-”

“ S-Stop talking, Dylan . We’re almost there.“ I fucking wheezed out, shifting his weight on me again, and doing it gently once more.

I was definitely understanding Don’s fear of ever picking him the hell up in the first place. This piggyback was going to count as my workout for the rest of the fucking year.

Thankfully, fucking hell, I could see the dirt road that led up to the cabin in the distance. It was definitely full-on nighttime, the time now close to eight at night, but Helen was using a flashlight a few feet behind Dylan and I to light the way, all while Molly stumbled next to her, absolutely exhausted.

I fucking hated the dark… but right now, the need to just get everyone back to the cabin was overpowering all that fear. At least one of us had had the idea to bring a compass out, not trusting our phone signals much, which was me. And I was right. That was mainly how we had gotten back here in the first place.

Molly was quick to scurry up ahead so she could get the door open for us while I carried Dylan inside and kicked my shoes off. He had tried to utter a protest, claiming he’d be fine to get up the stairs himself, but I just told him to shut up before I braced these activated leg muscles and started the climb. Molly and Helen downright collapsed on the couches downstairs themselves, completely over the day as a whole and refusing to climb these bloody stairs.

Once I did finally get Dylan upstairs and into the room we chose, I turned and gently sat down on the bed, resting him on the edge of it with me before standing to turn back to him.

“Jacket off,” I instructed the man whose sinuses were now really acting up. He looked utterly miserable, but he still removed his light jacket he had changed into before we had left for the hike, handing it over reluctantly so I could hang it in our closet in here.

I then checked my phone quick, ignoring the straight fire my body was on from that hike bike to make sure we were in good time, before I glanced up at Dylan again.

“Lay down and rest. I’ll try to be back before 9pm. There’s a drug store about thirty minutes away that we can get to if we book it.”

Dylan gently shifted further back onto the mattress. “Do they have-”

“Bonine? Yes, I checked once I got a bar of signal on my phone about an hour ago.”

Dylan offered me a weak smile, and a returned it with a warm smile of my own. “Y-You’re… you’re the fucking best, you know that?”

“Yes. Yes I do. Now rest , and I’ll be back in a bit,” I replied, taking a few steps forward to bend down and give him a quick kiss before I was off.

I ended up taking Helen’s Jeep out. I tried to convince her to her to go with me since it wasn’t my car, but she just tossed her keys my way while laying on the couch, and said, “just take good care of my baby and go save your man.”

Aaaaand that was about it.

The drive wasn’t crazy or anything, luckily the Jeep had some strong high beam headlights in the pitch dark to give me a decent view of the roads, but I drove for the most part in complete silence, not bothering to waste time on figuring out the Bluetooth, or the radio before starting the car.

I did end up making it just in time before they shut those doors at 8:30PM, and while the older gentleman running the store solo seemed to want to wring my neck for rushing in at 8:26PM, he still let me shop around quickly.

Molly and Helen had taken care of bringing all the food, beverages, and snacks for this weekend, with Molly knowing what Dylan and I loved to a T, but I re-upped on some candy I knew could always never be enough for him, a sweet treat for when he hopefully felt better by morning, before finding the right medication and a few extra over-the-counter brands I went with to hopefully help.

I was trying to be in and out as quick as possible to both save myself on the mean muggin glares I knew this store worker had in him, as well as hoping I’d be back by the time I told Dylan I’d be back at. I was trying to make it to the cabin before he fell asleep, and I knew that was going to be soon judging by the state he was in.

After checking out, thanking the older man for keeping the store open for me, and rushing back into Helen’s whip, I headed back the way I came.

Once again, being out here in the middle of the night freaked me the absolute hell out, but at least I had a few bars of connection around the main roads as opposed to the deep trenches of hell Molly’s shitty map led us into.

As soon as I got back, parking this smooth ride next to Dylan’s SUV, Molly and Helen had just crashed on the couch, cuddled up together with the electric fireplace going in the living room, and some spooky movie playing on the tv hung right above it. They didn’t even slightly stir once I got back, locked the cabin door, and set Helen’s keys on the coffee table for her to find in the AM.

And best believe I booked it up those stairs after I poured a glass of water for Dylan’s medication, before this creepy fucking film added to my already heightened anxiety of being out alone in the dark.

As soon as I made it to Dylan and I’s room, Dylan was definitely knocked out in bed, tucked under the covers now. I walked towards the bedside table opposite of where he was resting to turn on, then dim one of the bedside lamps.

He looks so peaceful tucked under the covers… and as I made my way around to his side, setting the glass of water on his bedside table along with the medication and candy, I swear it fucking took everything in me to have to wake him.

I tried to do it gently, placing my hand above the thick comforter to softly shake his shoulder, and it took a little while, but Dylan slowly opened his eyes to me.

“Hey there, tiger,” I whispered with a smile. “I brought some meds. Can you sit up a bit for me?”

Dylan had to blink some sleep from his eyes, but he slowly pushed himself up more while I removed my hand and started pulling out the meds I bought.

I popped open the foil for the capsules and handed the pills to Dylan, before picking up the glass, waiting for him to pop the pills in his mouth, then handed him the water.

Dylan looked exhausted honestly, so as soon as he took the meds, I set the glass back on the table and let him snuggle himself back under the comforter to hopefully fall back asleep while I started removing all the outdoor clothes I had on me.

Everyone had been too exhausted to even start to give a shit about dinner tonight, myself included. I just stripped down to my briefs, climbed into the bed next to Dylan who had apparently done the same while I was out, and reached over to shut the lamp off on my end before I settled into this warmth.

From Dylan’s steady breaths, I thought he had to have fallen back sleep right away… but almost instantly, I felt a long, warm arm snake its way around my cold waist and he pulled me back into his warmth, making sure my back was damn near cemented to the front of him, his semi-hard dick pressed against my ass.

The warmth alone had forced light shivers through my whole body, but the way he lifted his head slightly, nuzzling it into the back of my neck, made those light shivers intensify wicked fucking fast.

“ Thank you, Isiah ,“ he mumbled into my delicate skin, giving me soft kisses there. “ I love you so fucking much .“

I couldn’t even try to cool the immediate erratic rhythm my heart was thrown into, but I still nodded my head slight, loving the feeling of how he cuddled his into me further. “I-I love you, too.”

And that was about the last thing I remembered happening before sleep shot us in the face with a 48 caliber pistol.

When I stirred awake again, it was some time in the middle of the night…

And it was definitely because Dylan’s body had jolted awake somewhere behind me, his body still somewhat entangled with my own as his hand was still wrapped around my waist, and his legs were intertwined with mine.

I was about to turn around and make sure he was alright, but then I felt him start the meticulous process of slowly untangling himself, and from how hard his body was shaking, I knew what it might’ve been that woke him up. I also knew how he used to get about it… when he used to accidentally wake me up like this when we were younger.

How pissed he got with himself about it… so I tried to pretend that it was okay. That I hadn’t woken up. Usually his body would relax back into bed…

Yet sometimes, much like tonight, it didn’t.

Instead I felt him slowly get out of bed, and creep towards the door of the dark room. He had done this before… and at first maybe I didn’t understand, but when I heard the door quietly open and shut to our bedroom, I decided I would just lay here awake, waiting things out for him to return.

There was a good possibility that he was just getting a glass of water… except for the fact that there was still a half-full glass on his bedside.

Then I thought that maybe… maybe he forget I set it back there. He was still drowsy from sleep then and maybe he was still drowsy now.

Or maybe he wanted a snack? We’d all skipped dinner so that would’ve made sense… even though, knowing Dylan, he would’ve just reached for the candy I set next to him instead.

Still, I laid here in bed just waiting for him to return.

And time was a tricky thing to gauge; every second felt like an hour was passing. This me wanted to throw these covers off me and check on him, and I knew I shouldn’t but I really wanted to. In all actuality, it was probably only 5 minutes max that he was gone for, but that felt like the longest five minutes of my damn life.

I heard the door to the bedroom slowly creak open then close, and Dylan started to take as quiet steps as he could back to his side of the bed before slowing to a stop near it. I could hear his soft swallows as he probably drank some of that water, distinctly hearing the glass settle on the wooden table with my back still turned to him, and he placed something else on the table, too, maybe his phone or something before I felt the covers stir and the mattress dip slightly from his weight.

My body slowly turned, sitting up a bit to see just the lowest bit of light coming in from the open screen doors to the balcony, probably contributed by the full moon tonight, and Dylan’s breath immediately caught in his throat.

“Shit,” he whispered to me, “I woke you up, didn’t I?”

I found myself slowly shaking my head, making out the dimness of his features. “I couldn’t feel your heat anymore,” I only partially lied as I whispered back. I didn’t want him thinking the way he suddenly woke up was an issue.

It never was.

It never had been.

“I’m sorry, Isiah,” he whispered, sinking lower into the bed, but I just did what I always did when this happened during our sleepovers as kids. When he woke up at my place and couldn’t go back to sleep.

I gently patted my chest, sitting up just a bit more. And Dylan immediately complied as he shifted himself a bit lower so he could rest his head there. The comfort of his shampoo and his cologne made my own breaths settle further, coercing my left arm to wrap around him while the fingers of my right hand tangled themselves into the long strands of his soft curls.

I started to gently run those fingers through his hair, my left hand stroking up and down the bare skin of his left arm, as I felt him relax even further against me.

“Another nightmare?” I whispered softly- so softly, I wasn’t sure whether he had heard me until I felt his head slowly nod against my bare chest. This hadn’t happened in years… but I didn’t mention that. It didn’t feel right to.

“Eighteen years old and the past is still haunting me,” he murmured silently, snuggling deeper while hir left arm held my waist tight.

Holding him like this- skin to skin- it was the most comfortable feeling. It was the first time he had laid like this where I could feel the softness of him against me with zero barriers.

“It’s okay,” I comforted him in the most gentle way I could. “This. You here resting with me like this. This will always be okay, Dylan,” I made sure to further assure him, but I had noticed from the second he rested his head down on me that he was much calmer. Usually it would take a while for him to settle into me completely.

And there was only one person alive who could do that so fast- calm him like that.

“You call your dad?” I whispered to him. He slowly nodded his head in return. “Good,” I then replied, smiling a bit. “Now get some rest… and remember what I always said. It’s a haunting of the past, Dylan… not your present moment… he-… he can’t hurt you anymore.”

And I felt one last gentle nod into my chest, before his breathing eventually slowed to the comfort of sleep.

I woke up the following morning early.

Like way earlier than I expected… and with Dylan’s head now tucked just under my shoulder, fast asleep.

Of course I had wanted to stay like this with him until he did finally stir awake… but then I decided I had a much better idea to try and maybe ease a bit of the rough evening- the even rougher night he had.

I was incredibly gentle as I separated myself from Dylan, placing a pillow in my stead for his arms to wrap around, then I slowly crept out of bed.

My body felt like it had been hit by a moving train… but I tried to remain as quiet as possible, ignoring the burning sensation in my arms and legs.

I first had to leave our room and head to the other bedroom to grab some sweats from my bag because I refused to put on the fitness joggers I had worn from the hike yesterday that was still on the floor of the bedroom Dylan and I shared.

I almost forgot a shirt until I realized some of the hickeys Dylan left the last couple weeks were still kind of visible, and so I doubled back to snatch one fast from my duffel before making my way downstairs.

Molly and Helen were still knocked the hell out on the couch, and the tv had long since continued playing random horror movies, to which I quickly found the remote and switched that shit to some HBO show that randomly popped up from the smart tv’s Home Screen.

Molly seemed to wake up from the dead as I set the remote down, muttering, “ hey , I was watching that .“

Like hell she was.

But Helen gently shushed her, pulling the shorter- well, fun sized as she loved to remind us- gal back to her as they lie lengthwise on the couch.

Then they both knocked out again, not giving a damn by my random choice of show.

I headed to the kitchen after that with determination to chef up something for Dylan before he woke up. There was no way he wouldn’t be hungry given the last 14 or so hours we had experienced, and because I was already here and awake, I decided to just make something for everyone.

“I smell food,” Molly muttered as she finally entered the kitchen in the clothes she was wearing yesterday, rubbing sleep from her eyes, minus the light jacket she tossed on the large couch rocker adjacent to the main couch. The kitchen was right behind the couch which was allowing me to both watch whatever was playing on the tv while I mixed together eggs in a large bowl on this kitchen island.

“Fuck that ,” Helen grumbled, equally tired and also in the same clothes minus her jacket. “I smell coffee.”

“Yes,” I nodded to Molly first, then turned to Helen with an equal, “and yes.”

“You making enough for all of us or just your boyfriend?” Molly questioned.

“ Oh yes, Molly ,“ I replied, “I’m cracking damn near two whole carton of eggs for Dylan alone.”

Literally I was cracking 16 eggs total for everyone because I was not walking back into this kitchen until it was time for us to make dinner.

“Have you seen him?” Helen countered. “I wouldn’t put it past him if he could clear an entire carton by himself. Hell, I’m still in aw that you managed to carry him all the way back yesterday. That was like at least a four mile stretch back.”

Yeah, I definitely felt all at least four of those fucking miles this morning, with every muscle in my body tense, screaming at me two infamous words that Mickey ironically loved using with everyone: you fucker .

Whatever adrenaline I had then had completely worn off now.

“Are you making a fruit salad or something?” Helen then asked, gesturing to the package of strawberries I had out to dice up right after this. “And Molly, where ya heading?” She followed up with as I looked over and she looked back to watch Molly start taking the wooden steps with a snail’s pace.

She delivered two words to us, not even bothering to look back as the short woman gripped that banister for dear life, using it to help her tackle each step. “Champagne. Mimosas.”

“Molly,” I countered quick as shit, “it’s like half past eight in the morning. There’s no fucking way in hell you want us to drink-”

“5’oclock somewhere,” Molly countered, and at that point, I just let her go.

What Molly had smelled that woke her up was probably the heaping pile of breakfast sausages and bacon I had made for everyone, and Helen was quick to snag a piece of bacon off the pile as she looked at me. “Fruit salad then?” She asked. I shook my head no.

The best I could land on was, “you’ll see.”

And I hadn’t lied… because there really was no way to explain Dylan’s favourite comfort food.

I loved my boyfriend dearly , but this was something I was going to have to force him to explain himself.

••

51. Unconditionally

Shitttt I forgot to slap an explicit warning on chapter 49 lol… but, well, it’s explicit

Anyways, here’s to more completely unedited chapters lol… and another double upload potentially cause why not? These chapters go hand in hand so pleaseee lemme know what you think of them

Enjoy!

xoxo

Dylan

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/84c764d6ecbf6e551ea9db1c4c37012f96af2f1e/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f36464c656e6179536d7141635f773d3d2d313539363431343236312e313838333662663530373765653638333731303032363430373230312e6a7067)               

There weren’t enough words in the English language to explain just how horribly shit had snowballed into as soon as we got about half a mile into the thick forest.

I, of course, wanted to hang back with Isiah to begin with… but he was unfortunately right.

Molly and Helen couldn’t and honestly shouldn’t have done that hike alone.

And while I had thought I had hit all the important stuff- taken all the meds I might need to survive what was the great outdoors- whatever the air was polluted with in this dense forest, I had started to feel heavily by maybe mile three.

Isiah picked up on quickly, suggesting that maybe we turn around, but Molly and I were trying to navigate the paper map she had because we had all lost signal at some point. She kept promising that after this trail, or on the next turn in, we’d see a path leading down to a river, but I should’ve known better.

Isiah stayed by my side still, probably trying to hide his concerns once I grew more and more congested, yet it was no use.

I hated to admit it then, and even now, but Molly had been right about how fun a hike would be with us four. It was my greed to keep being able to hold Isiah’s hand in mine like that as I led him along while studying this stupid map in the setting sun, which ultimately led to what happened by 6 PM.

I had almost brought both him and I down when I got hit with the most intense case of vertigo, but luckily Isiah had caught on to my imbalance probably a smooth quarter mile ago, yanking me back by the my hand with his to stumble backwards instead of falling directly on my face.

That was when the first night at the cabin took one shitfest of a turn.

First, we all immediately decided to say screw it to the river, and try to make our way back home the way we came. My feet carried me about a mile and 3/4 before I realized I really couldn’t fucking walk without feeling like the world was spinning. I had tried to rest as Isiah initially suggested, but after he realized that it was this- the forest itself- that was eating my sinuses alive, he turned around quick and placed his arms behind his back, ready to carry me.

I had tried again and again to protest it because we were out so fucking far and I knew that regardless of how hard he had hit the gym this last year, this was going to suck for him. Like really, really suck for him.

But the straight worry in Isiah’s eyes, and the fact that we only had very little time now before everything around us would be night, I was quite literally forced to accept his offer.

At some point I did make a dramatic request for them to just leave me behind and save themselves, but Isiah had told me to shut the hell up, pulled a compass from his front pocket, and had Molly hold it before demanding I get on his back.

The guilt of it all began to eat me a way as soon as Isiah had to first adjust my weight once I climbed on. My going rate for apologies to my boyfriend within the next mile and a half we walked for was about nine to eighteen a minute. That had put us about three miles in back towards the cabin, and three more to go.

Shamefully, as soon as we hit that mid point, I felt too fucking gross to even remember what I was saying anymore.

A lot of the walk back was taken in utter silence, a complete contrast to the walk deep into these woods, and while Molly and Helen seemed miserable, just huffing and puffing, I did have half a working mind to realize it was because the pace Isiah was taking was fast. Steadily fast.

He told me on occasion to wrap my legs tighter so he could pull his phone from his pocket and check it, but I was too busy trying to breath right to notice what he was doing. The fatigue had settled in, and it took everything not to fall asleep. Not to place literal dead weight on Isiah who seemed far less mad about how this had turned out, and just far more concerned…

I didn’t really remember when we actually made it to the cabin.

I remembered peeking my head up from Isiah’s shoulders when I felt him kick his shoes off at the entrance to the cabin, feeling the warmth of the shelter, and my aching throat at some point forced out to Isiah that that I could try to walk up the stairs from here.

There was no denying that even if Isiah didn’t want to show it, I knew for a fact his whole body was on fire. The cold air was the only thing stopping him from breaking a sweat, and his face was crimson from the hard workout back.

He just told me to shut up, though, or something like that, and I listened. I wholeheartedly listened.

This all too good for me guy had gotten me up those wooden steps and into our room, sitting down with gentleness on the edge of our bed which had to have his legs soaring with pain for even being able to do after all that, then he sat up, turned around, and told me to take my jacket off.

I did manage to kick my shoes off too, landing them on the floor near this edge, and just followed whatever Isiah had said from then on. I was far too fucking out of it to even register much.

What I did remember hearing was that he’s be back soon, which instantly made me alarmed.

I believe Isiah had said something about a drug store, and I started to mention the drug I probably needed for the dizziness and vertigo, but Isiah already knew exactly what I needed.

He fucking always did. Always .

I think the very last memory I had before he left involved him telling me to just lay back and rest, giving me the briefest of kisses before he was gone.

My body must’ve just been running on auto-pilot, because the next time my crusty eyes opened, I had somehow stripped myself to my briefs, tucked myself into bed, and slept for god knows how long.

It was the gentle shakes that had me using just enough energy from that slumber to sit up some so I could take the pills he placed in my hand, and the water he handed next.

Once again… the only look on Isiah’s face was worry. Just worry. No anger. No agitation. Just worry.

I knew he had joined me in bed not too long later because I could feel him near me, so before my body could fully shut me down for a recovery period only brought on by sleep, I made sure to pull him close, snuggling in as close as humanly possible.

I made certain to tell him thank you.

And I didn’t waste one fucking second telling him just how much I loved him…

The pills were good for helping while I slept… but the dream I had wasn’t.

It had… it had been so long since I had dreamt about my childhood. Before I met my father. When I was still spending those long hours with my mums ex. The worst part about these nightmares were that they were just memories. They were just forcing me to relive that feeling of being frightened in my own home.

Not knowing a single place that felt safe.

I had always been good at school, but everyone at my old elementary had hated me for it. So not even that felt fucking safe.

These nightmares had made me relive the pain. When I had to endure Harry’s outbursts, with me becoming the easiest target for him to take his anger out on.

I tried to wake myself from these dreams, but it was no use. It was like I knew they were just that- dreams… nightmares… and though I knew all so clearly what safety felt like now- it was the home my dad created for me- these nightmares seemed to strip that knowledge away. They crippled me in ways that had me waking from them terrified.

Shaking.

But it had been years since I last had one. Maybe like four years ago or something. This dream had hit me like a flight truck, and when I woke up with the sudden jolt I always did, instant remorse and guilt burrowed their way into my emotions once I realized who I was holding.

The night had reminded me of all the sleepovers with Isiah where I had done that. I had woken up, and woken him up like that.

If I was at his place, Isiah would hold me regardless of what age we were, having me rest my head on his chest as he massaged my scalp with his fingers.

But… now?

I mean, I was eighteen for Christ sakes. I wasn’t a kid anymore, and while I might not have known where Harry had fucked off to, I knew my dad well enough to know that he took care of it.

He was never going to let what happened at the Alpines all those years ago, with Harry showing up there with my mum, happen again.

The way that old man rearranged his intense schedule like it was nothing to make damn sure I would never breathe the same oxygen as that piece of shit, showed me then just how much my father recognized more in me that was in him. Once in him. Most likely still in him, regardless of the love he had surrounded himself over the years.

Whenever this happened at home and Isiah wasn’t there to gradually calm me down, I would wake up, knocking the lightest knock on my dad’s door if it wasn’t open already, and my dad would come ease that terror instantly, just like he always had. Just like him alone always could.

And so, this first night at the cabin, I found myself sneaking away in the middle of the night after grabbing my phone off the table. I entered the bathroom that was located up here with all the bedrooms, then flipped on the light, closed, and locked the door.

My phone screen told me it was about three in the morning, which made my heart quickly tighten. I didn’t know if my dad would answer…

Which was funny-… that worry I had.

My dad had never, in his entire life, missed a call from me.

Nor did he miss this one.

“Dylan?” There was instant worry in his voice. He was alert and concerned, but his voice was lower and probably trying not to wake Carson as he snuck away. Then he spoke a little louder after that, saying “what is it, kiddo? Are you okay? Do you need me?”

“ No

, “ I tried to rush out in a quiet voice of my own. I knew if I told him I did, keys would already be in his hand, regardless of the longer drive from New Jersey to here. And I didn’t want to ruin his getaway weekend with Carson before it had even barely begun, nor did I want to leave this weekend escape with Isiah. “I…” I started, unable to smooth the shakiness in my voice as this phone rattled near my ear.

My hands were still shaking, my whole body was. My heart was pounding from the fear and intensity of the nightmare alone.

“I…” I tried again, and yet as I begged myself to say something- anything

• to keep this call short… I was at a loss for words.

But even with this silence, my dad still heard everything he needed to.

“It’s… it’s

been a while since, hasn’t it? “ He asked me quietly, and I could only muster the weakest hum in response. “Find a flat surface to rest your back against, Dylan. I’ll guide you through it.”

Just that… just that gentleness in his voice was enough to calm some parts of this frightening feeling down.

I found myself stumbling back to the wall facing the bathroom mirror, and leant my weight against it. I could feel some of that tense strain on my body start to soothe over.

“Place a hand over your chest,” he continued. His voice was once riddled with alarm when he first picked up, but now it was the most tranquil, familiar thing I welcomed, reminding me of all those times he had tucked me in. Everytime he placed his own hand over my chest. “Remember. Two things to focus on, kiddo. Your heartbeat, and your breathing. Don’t lose sight of either of them, okay?”

I nodded like he was in this bathroom with me now, walking me down from this panic in person. He didn’t need a verbal response from me, he just knew I was following his direction.

“I’m here,” my dad told me, just like he’d done so many time before. “I’m here. I’m with you. And I’ve got you. I’ve always got you, Dylan. Whatever pain you’re feeling, it’ll pass. Just let it pass through you.”

I could feel my heartbeat slowing. My breathing growing deeper, longer.

“Release that tension, Dylan… Your muscles tend to hold memories… but letting go of that tension is always a choice you own the fortitude to make. They don’t control you anymore. They once did… but not any longer.”

It felt like my body was melting into this wall now. My hand was starting to hold this phone up to my ear with such ease as the shaking subsided.

“I’m with you, kiddo. I’ll always be. And there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe, regardless of the distance between us. You are my son.”

At that… that was all it took. That was all it had ever taken for me to calm down completely. And with each time I heard him like this, it took less and less time. With each year that passed, I was reminded of just how far my father would go to keep me safe.

Even if it was from my own mind at times.

“Deep breaths, Dylan. Feel the decompression of your chest. The slowing heartbeat. The stillness of your muscles. Your mind will always try to convince you that you aren’t strong enough to create that stillness for yourself… but you’re

my

fucking son . You’ve got more than enough in you.“

There was a biting slight edge to his words at the end, which honestly made my eyes sting a bit. It was the rarity I didn’t see often…

He was letting me in to a bit more of his own emotions tonight.

“Dad?” I whispered into the line. “Is… is everything alright?”

“It will be,” he replied in return. “Now go . Get some rest. Call me in the morning to check in, alright?”

I had wanted to be concerned… but there was that assurity in his words as he spoke them.

It will be .

Regardless of what had happened or what my father felt, I found myself all the more relieved by his admission. He could have told me yes . He could have lied- or rather, withheld from me, telling me not to worry… but the fact he didn’t  already told me all I needed to know.

That it was- whatever it was- was going to be alright. He was going to make certain of it.

“Okay,” I whispered back, trusting him. Assuring him. “And Pops?”

“What is it, kiddo?” He replied in that same gentle tone.

“Thank you… thank you for fixing it. Thank you for always fixing it.”

There was a quiet pause on the line before he answered with, “that’s always been how I show you that I love you. Unconditionally . I’ll fix whatever’s broken, Dylan. I’ll carry whatever weighs your shoulders down. Now get some rest, kiddo.”

“I… I… I love you too, Daddio,” I whispered back. “And I’ll call you in the morning.” That was a promise to him as I ended the call. He never asked for much, and with nights like these, it made me realize just that.

He sounded overbearing to those who didn’t understand… but he understood.

He understood more than anyone else ever did. Ever could .

When I snuck back into the bedroom, I tried to be as quiet as I could. I didn’t think I woke Isiah up until placed my phone back on the table and climbed into bed, only for him to start sitting up more on the mattress.

The guilt I felt was both immediate, and seemingly infinite at first.

“Shit,” I spoke, keeping the volume of my voice the lowest. “I woke you up, didn’t I?”

Isiah slowly shook his head no in this dim room. He and I were barely silhouettes. “I couldn’t feel your heat anymore.”

I couldn’t tell if that was the whole truth, but I didn’t pry. I knew why he said it.

“I’m sorry, Isiah,” I still whispered, sinking lower into the bed to lie next to him, but Isiah did something I couldn’t help but feel that warmness and familiarity spread from.

He gently patted to his chest, sitting up a little more. And I accepting this wholeheartedly as I got comfortable further down on this bed so I could rest my head right on him. That chest of his. He wasted little time slowly wrapping his left arm around me, with my own left arm holding onto his waist. I could feel his fingers tangle themselves into my hair, but I was melting against his skin by his warmth alone.

The soft strokes from the fingertips of his left hand as he ran them across my shoulder, down my left upper arm and bicep, just made me cuddle him harder.

“Another nightmare?” He  asked softly- so softly, i had to register that words were said before I eventually nodded into him.

“Eighteen years old and the past is still haunting me,” I murmured quietly, just holding him tighter. All I could do was remember my father’s words. It would never matter the age with him, however embarrassed I was now, and there was no one I trusted the words of more than him.

When he said he could keep me safe all those years ago, he made certain he never failed to. It didn’t matter what age I reached. It never would.

“It’s okay,” Isiah’s voice sounded like silk now near my ears. His heartbeat was quick, but I could feel him slowing it. For me. “This. You hear against me like this. This will always be okay, Dylan,”

And those words from Isiah just wiped away the remaining guilt. This beautiful soul holding me was the only one who ever knew the extent of everything from my past… and he had never shied away from this broken part my father would constantly fix, again and again. Each year, putting together less and less pieces.

“You call your dad?” He asked me. I slowly nodded again. “Good,” he replied. “Now get some rest… and remember what I always said. It’s a haunting of the past, Dylan… the nightmares. It’s not your present moment anymore… he-… he can’t hurt you anymore.”

And I gave him one final, gentle nod into hi chest, before I finally felt myself accept this much needed sleep.

When I awoke the following morning, with rays of morning daylight pouring into this room, the very first thing I did was reach for Isiah…

Which I very easily found out as my arms returned to me empty, that he wasn’t in this bed anymore.

That sat me up so fucking fast I always gave this tender head of mine some fucking whiplash.

And I didn’t even process much, deciding to throw these covers off myself as I stood up to quickly go investigate… until I watched the door to our bedroom open, and one handsome fucking guy walked through, holding a large tray filled with breakfast in his hands. His voice immediately snapped at me.

“Get back in bed, Dylan. You’re supposed to still be resting.”

And I think it was pretty much then, after the complete hell I had just gone through in such a short amount of time, when I realized something pretty intense.

I wanted it all with him someday.

The house.

The cars parked in the driveway.

The white picket fence.

A dog and a cat, preferably…

And some little rascal running around that we could call ours, playing in the yard out front. A kid that I could show my love to like my dad had done with me all of these years.

…Unconditionally .

So in order to solidify this dream as my vivid reality, I followed my boyfriend’s rather direct orders, and got my ass back in bed wicked fucking fast.

••

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/1a7793cd5a38c59097b8a016033d63d718888478/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f754b35657a6e51546949365759413d3d2d313539363431343236312e313838333662666433646235666437633736313539393437383034342e6a7067)

52. Retiring An Asset

Don

“It’s late,” a familiar voice replied, forcing a genuine smile on my cold lips. “Later than usual, even for you, Whittaker-Jones,” he added. “But then again… it’s never really been too late with us, has it?”

Mr. Bellington released a light chuckle, already cutting through any tension I always felt when I dialed this number- removing whatever shame I was once drowning in from how long it had been since I last called.

“And still, it’s expected for tonight. I supposed you heard the news about your old man, then?”

I found myself nodding on this terrace, breathing in the fresh crisp air before I simply whispered the word “yes.”

“I can hear the slight breeze on this line, Donny boy. Don’t tell me you picked up cigarettes again.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle lightly at his sterner voice. When was the last time I heard it , I wondered. “Wouldn’t dream of it, old man,” I replied with instead. “I’ve got a kid to see about well into my old age, remember?”

“How could I forget?” He asked me, making this smile more permanent.

“I’m just taking in the fresh air,” I then explained. “I’m in New Jersey for the weekend with Carson. He booked a hotel with a walk out.”

“ I know ,“ he replied into the line all too casually, forcing yet another light chuckle to fall past my cold lips.

Of course he did.

“If you’re standing outside in this chilly air, Don, ringing me of all people, then there must be much on your mind. You want to know how, I take it? About your old man?”

His own words had earned him another slow nod, even if he wasn’t here with me to accept it.

“Yes,” I eventually replied.

“Don’t worry, kiddo. My full explanation will come in the form of an email shortly after this call,” Bellington assured me. “This is a safe line. You’ve only ever been the one who’s had access to it… But to put it plainly for you now- to settle those thoughts of yours- you’ve gone to great lengths making sure your old man never learned of Dylan. And that won’t be possible for much longer, kiddo. He may be keeping his Holland name, but that kid of yours…”

I heard Theo’s voice trail off for a moment, and I couldn’t help but lean back against the glass sliding door, feeling the weight of his honest words as it meshed with the icing temperature of the glass itself.

“He’s yours , Don. Through and through . Always has been, always will be . And most importantly, he’s gaining quite the attention with those impressive grades and accolades.”

I took the sharpest of inhales, already seeing the parallels before Mr. Bellington felt the need to say them. Even now as I leant against this door, calming my own heartbeat. My own breaths.

Every conversation between him and I was always a lesson- one he made sure by the end of it I could simply never forget.

“The email I’ll send contains a graduation gift for him. Him and that boyfriend of his. But I couldn’t gift this to him while your father was still breathing. I couldn’t gift this opportunity to your son in hopes of mending the time I took from you and him, all while honoring the one thing most important in your life now, Don. Him .”

I couldn’t help but curl my lip in, biting down on it to salvage this wreck of emotions I was feeling. What a mess this night had been.

And I wasn’t mad at him. Bellington.

I was… I was feeling quite the opposite of whatever anger was, having heard him simply admit what I knew deep down was truth.

“You always did clean up my messes,” I got out in barely a whisper.

“Perhaps,” Bellington replied. “And you know why… just as I know you , kiddo. There must be more to this call than just your father, though, and you do usually call much closer to the holidays… so, what is it?… What is it really? “

I didn’t feel this feeling often… but it was hard to escape this familiarity.

To escape this feeling I felt whenever I heard Theodore’s chilling voice take such a comforting turn…

I had lost Hobs. I had lost my father…

And yet, even now, against most better judgement, I still ran to one man I knew I could, regardless of however much time had passed between us.

“About eight years ago…” I started, but my voice was far from steady. “I… I once called you about a man. At that time, I told you to make him vanish, but to keep your distance, and yet…” my eyes quickly shifted to this tiled floor.

“ Dylan’s still having those nightmares, isn’t he? “

I had to pull the phone away from me to take the deepest breath, still feeling the slight, sharp stinging in my eyes as I looked back up towards the city.

Theo always knew more than- always made note of more than he let on. That was just who he was. Perhaps who he once conditioned me to be.

“Back then… I had wanted to keep your hands clean, but… but I also had something I desperately wanted to prove. That I… that-… that I-”

“ That you could chang e,“ Theo finished for me gently. “That you… well, that had the ability to. That you weren’t the man I created- molded , once. That you could be better than that . Better than me, yes?”

I felt my fucking lip quiver as I tried to hold in my emotions. There wasn’t a person alive anymore who knew me like Bellington did. Who knew the man I was then and the man I was now.

“It’s alright, kiddo. You’ve only ever asked a favor of me since leaving my side, if it involved your kid. I took care of it against your wishes eight years ago. Permanently .”

His words almost made me drop this phone on the tiles below my feet. Right by these hotel slippers I had walked out here with minutes ago. I knew what permanently had meant.

“Th-… Theo-…”

“ He hurt your kid, Don . What makes you think I wouldn’t?“

Those… those words alone cut through me in a way I wasn’t certain of how to respond to.

“Th-Then-… why… why didn’t…” I couldn’t help but whisper this last part. “Why did you keep my father alive all this time?” The rawness in my voice surely told him everything now.

“Would you like the truth, or a lie?” He asked.

And that alone pulled from me a smile that was so fucking unexpected as I recalled this question time and time again.

I was well into my old age enough to understand now.

That he was asking which part of me wanted the truth and which part wanted the lie. My heart… or my mind.

“…Humor me with the truth, old man,” I whispered in return, quoting words only he and I understood.

And I heard Theo chuckle to himself.

“What I told you eight years ago was the truth.” He then admitted. “I’m getting too old. Not much brings me joy these days besides your rare calls, or any opportunity I have to associate myself with you once again. Even if it’s just for a moment, Donny,”

I felt my heart twist itself at that admission.

“One thing I did find joy in, was being the only channel your father ever had to news about you. I was the one who got to tell him first about the achievements- the accolades- the skills you fine tuned. And I got to see pain etch itself into his face that death alone was simply too easy for him to escape it with.”

This old man , I couldn’t help but think, accompanied with another unexpected smile. He had led me to believe that it was my father who had sought that information out all these years.

Bellington had made sure that my father knew. Theo had twisted the knife himself.

“I spent decades torturing him, which was probably why your visits with him never went well… yet then again… I’ve never claimed to be a good man . And just like Harry hurt your son- with you spending eight long years devoted to undoing that pain… your father hurt you in ways I’ve long since decided to devote whatever years I have left, undoing it myself.”

A realization soon dawned on me. There may never be enough fresh air out here to satisfy my lungs… and yet this conversation poured more into them than any breaths I could, would.

“You’re calling me now because this- what Harry did to Dylan- you’re terrified that it can never be fixed… And anything that can scare the Great Donald Whittaker- Whittaker-Jones now, I suppose-… well… I simply don’t take lightly to it.”

The warm lights surrounding me, engulfing this city, had started to blur as my eyes glossed over.

“You constantly say you could never forget- how much I know you- and yet you seem to constantly do,” he chastised. “I was there at your most broken, slicing my own hands open to pick up the pieces… but isn’t that what a father does? Isn’t that what you are doing now?”

That biting sensation threatening to collapse finally did, as I felt warm liquid break the surface- the tension created by these glossy eyes, as a few tears rolled freely down my cheek.

“I did not mean to force your hand, kiddo, but my decision with your father was both selfish and selfless,” Bellington admitted to me.

And as heavy as this felt, I had asked for it.

I had ask for the truth each time he offered it, for he knew I wanted to hear those honest words speak to my heart, not my mind. He had trained my mind too well. He knew how to answer that part of me… and these days, it was my heart that I led with.

“To protect your son, I gave up a large part of my joy- the act of making sure your father never knew peace… because that was what you needed, Don. And to bring me joy now, I’m drawing in line the parallels made between the decision for you to dial this number, knowing what you’d ask, all while knowing what I did to your father. There is some comfort in knowing that you and I could make the same cold decision, to protect the ones we love. It makes me feel closer to you, for better or worse.”

His words alone had made me see the parallels for myself.

“If we are to honor the honesty between us tonight, Don, then I’ll admit I would’ve done the same for Harry. Put him in a home where he could see what became of what he abused… but he cut deeper than your father ever had. He hurt you in ways you went to great lengths to never allow your father the opportunity to do with your son. And for that, he sealed his fate without you ever needing to give me a name. I knew it already. The Alpines will always be yours… but you’ve kept the same security detail- my security detail- and I think you know exactly why.”

This glass behind me had to be the thickest, because it was bearing all my weight now.

“I’ve always told you I’m just a man protecting his asset when it comes to you, Don… but perhaps I had a few fears of my own back then when telling you that. I’ve grown far too old now to have any fears at all, and so I’ll admit to you tonight what it really was then, Donny boy. Donald Declan Dwyer . Whittaker by birth, but Dwyer by blood… that was something you spent these last eight years making sure of.”

I tried to silent the softest sobs that escaped me, but it was no fucking use. This was the closest I may have ever felt to anyone.

“Perhaps it really was back then with me, what it is now with you: a father simply protecting his son however way he can.”

Those words alone had me sliding down the glass door, willing to meet the tiled floor as my body began to shake. Even now, this old man knew how to fix the things I couldn’t.

“Now go collect on dues long overdue to you from the front desk of the home I placed that monster in, and go pick up his ashes in the process. I know you’ll find a way to give him burial he deserves… for you were always so creative with the way you could inflict pain, and it would bring me one last bit of joy associated with his misery, to know that that part of you is what I created. That it’ll be his final resting place.”

This was the honesty I had asked for. Needed. Something only he could give me. And it created peace amidst something I thought I couldn’t control.

“I will,” I told him honestly. “And… Theo?”

“Yes, kiddo?” He replied gently.

“What… what are you doing for the holidays?”

“Is that an invitation, Don?”

I found myself pausing with my words a moment, before I eventually nodded to myself. “Yeah… Yeah, it is.”

“ Good ,“ he replied, settling this call.

••

53. Wanna Play A Game?

Man, this whole chapter is basically smut lol. 3.7k words of it

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Also, omg I’m back into my Google account!

Praise be because losing access to my YouTube alone had me crashing out, let alone my Grammarly account

Warning: Explicit Content

Isiah

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/7ac41eacd0ae99bc158c2c2f3931231b8565db71/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f4f6c38642d425f776d4c6d7871673d3d2d313539363536353134342e313838336536356161343339626333643538383830353137373639362e6a7067)               

Dylan jumped right back into bed, waiting patiently for me to bring this tray over to him with the largest fucking smile, only seeming to grow on within his beautiful features.

“You didn’t have to-” he tried to argue, but I just shook my head, cutting him off while I set the whole tray on his lap above the comforter before sitting down at the side of the mattress, next to him.

Dylan’s face lit up expeditiously as soon as he saw what I had cooked up in that kitchen. “ Isiahhhhhhh ,“ he whined, that beautiful smile of his simply growing. The first thing he reached for before I could warn him of its damn contamination, however, was what he thought was just orange juice, and when he began to chug the fucking thing, he immediately started coughing. I had to grab the glass from him quick.

“ Not orange juice ,“ I rushed out.

“Is… is this fucking alcohol? “ He questioned, making me nod.

“ Molly ,“ was all I could say, and Dylan was quick to roll his eyes.

“Now, why the complete fuck would she make mimosas at this time?” My handsome boyfriend questioned. The best I had in me was a shrug and a sigh. Why Molly did many things was still a mystery to most.

“She wants to start the drinking early. I was already forced to down a beer while I finished cooking, and frankly, I’m way too fucking tired to put up a fight with her.” I wasn’t even remotely kidding; this was not a hill I was willing to die on with her today. “After the time spent on that hike, she can be piss drunk by noon if she wants to. I just told her there will be no helping her to the bathroom- she’ll have to deal with being drenched in her own vomit.”

Dylan nodded while I set the glass next to the empty glass of water. “O-Oh… shit…” his eyes followed my reach, “you bought me candy, too?”

My face was already turning redder, but the way Dylan looked back at me just made it worse. “I… you… you, well-… You had a rough night. Like a really rough night. A-And I wanted today to be better. I know Molly already bought a lot of this stuff, but I just-”

“There is one thing, believe it or not, that you haven’t done for me yet. And I think it’s all I really need to make today the best it can be.”

I felt my eyebrows furrow in slight confusion.

“What… what’s tha-” I didn’t even get that far because Dylan was already setting the tray to the side of him before he reached over and grabbed me by the front of my shirt, bringing my lips to his unexpectedly for a quick but soft kiss.

I half expected this guy to take it further because he damn near always took it further, but he let me go a second later, letting me get situated again on the side of the bed next to him… and that alone had me wishing that he did take things a little further… even if I knew he needed to eat first.

“Do you think you’d still want a Great Dane in give or take five to ten years?” He asked me. Those sharp eyes of his were searching mine for something, I couldn’t help but think, but I had no fucking idea what.

Regardless of this random ass question, I still eventually nodded. “Yeah, for sure. I mean, I don’t have the space for one now obviously, but that’s my dream dog, and in about five to ten years I should have my life together enough.”

“We’ll need a house,” Dylan stated more to himself, like it was the most obvious thing in the world…

But I immediately got hung up on the we part, making this heat spread through me faster than usual.

We .

Like me and him, we .

Like him and I.

“And a fence. Large backyard, too. And I was thinking about when a good age would be for us to adopt a ki-”

“Hey!” I heard Molly call from the door, her voice making Dylan and I jump from the sheer unexpectedness of it. “We’re coming in! I better not see food in places or on body parts it has no business being!”

That made Dylan glance past me to the opening door, while I turned around on the side of the bed right next to him to watch Molly come through the doorway first with a hand covering her eyes. Helen was just chuckling, whispering something to the small gal before Molly eventually pulled that hand away.

“Alright, you two. Today us four will be spending the day drinking, bonding, and hot tubbing until our skin prunes!” She announced, only to pull from her free hand that was tucked behind her back, what appeared to be a game of some kind.

I didn’t even know what it was… but it was Molly, so it was bound to either be something mischievous or just downright a bad idea as a whole.

“Throughout the day, each of us will be asked a question from this box. The questions range from Ice Breaker, to Deep, to Deeper. Then there are activity cards. If you choose not to answer the ice breaker question, you have to take a swig of beer. If you choose not to answer a deep question, you gotta take two full swigs… and if you pussy out on answering a deeper question, you gotta chug half the can. The activity cards must be completed, otherwise you’re chugging the whole can, no questions asked.”

“Have… have you lost your fucking mind? “ Dylan asked smack dab in the middle of chewing some of his breakfast. I hadn’t even noticed he had moved the tray back onto his lap and was going to town on the meal I made.

“Oh… my god ,” Helen whispered, interrupting this eventual back and forth between Dylan and Molly. “So… so you mean to tell me you weren’t joking about the eggs and strawberries?” She asked me, but her green eyes were staring dead straight at the tray on Dylan’s lap.

“Listen, that’s something Dylan has to explain,” I tried to insist.

“And I don’t have to explain a damn thing,” Dylan argued with a mouthful of said pairing- eggs and strawberries, which just made me chuckle. This was pretty much where we were going to be leaving that, I guess.

“And it tastes… normal to you?” Helen continued, to which Dylan nodded hard at. “Like… good , even?”

“Isiah makes the fluffiest scrambled eggs. These are perfect, baby, thank youuu ,” he cooed to me, making me blush even fucking harder as I looked down at his damn near almost half-finished breakfast. I was still thinking about what we were talking about before Molly and Helen came in, disrupting the peace.

About getting a dog… and… and adopting-… about our future together.

I wanted to hear more of that.

But alas , Molly was hellbent on getting this game going, and Dylan and I had literally no option but to participate.

Against many, many, many protests from my boyfriend, I ended up showering first while he finished eating.

He tried to argue that he could finish it later, but he needed to take his allergy meds on a full stomach, and the very last thing I wanted was this fucking giant passing out on me in the shower. While I did carry him all the way here yesterday, I sure as shit didn’t have that energy today… but I eventually promised him we’d take one together tonight after the hot tubbing.

Because I gave a damn about everyone and their livers in this home, I decided to start counting all our drinks for the day to make sure we were still staying somewhat sober and hydrated, and unfortunately, as soon as I got out the shower and made it to our bedroom to get Dylan his right medication, Molly accosted us each with a can of beer and the first question of the day.

Helen had already started prepping the hot tub outside, letting Molly know it would be done in a few hours and ready to use, so Molly paid Dylan and me a visit all on her own.

“First question!” The fun-sized girl announced, bursting into our room just as Dylan had pulled me into his lap and was trying to yank the towel that was wrapped around my waist, away.

I had literally just gotten out of the shower, and this man was already on go mode, attempting to get me naked while I tried to carry out my own boyfriendly duties: making sure he didn’t die from fucking allergies. His and my priorities were vastly different.

His excuse for attacking me as soon as I made it to his bedside to make sure he took all his medication?

Well, his exact words, delivered with his cute whining, were, “The hickeys I left are fadingg, Isiahhh … I-… I wanna make moree .” The medicine I had handed him from his bedside was barely halfway down his throat when he said that, before he managed to yank me back onto this bed, placing me on his lap with my back flush against his bare chest, already grabbing at the part of the towel I had tucked in to keep it around my waist.

And of course, because my body lacked all decorum, I was already getting hard. Like really fucking hard.

“Show some restraint!” Molly chastised us quickly as Dylan forced me to place all my weight back on him while he pulled the covers over us both so he could hide where exactly those large hands of his were reaching for.

With my ass pressed hard against him, pushed right up on his dick, I could feel just how turned on he was, and that warmth was spreading through me with wild speeds while Dylan slid his hand past the slit of the towel to touch my bare cock under this comforter.

“D-D-Dyl-” I fucking choked out. He placed his chin gently on the sensitive skin of my left shoulder, before asking Molly something that had to be the most batshit crazy thing, granted his hand was literally around my hard length. I tried to hold onto both his arms wrapped around me, holding me against him as he touched me in places that were eliminating words from my vocabulary, but it was no fucking use.

“What’s the question, Molly?” He asked, and the rough tone to that deep voice right next to my ear made my grip onto his sculpted forearms tighten. He had started to gently stroke me, forcing my head to tilt back into his chest.

“You two are complete freaks, my god,” Molly muttered more to herself, shaking her head in disgust, but not bothering to hide that glimmer of intrigue while I was just trying to keep it even remotely the fuck together.

Dylan was making my tip leak all over his left hand, and his right arm remained wrapped completely around the front of my waist, holding me firmly while I squirmed from his touch.

“The level is Deeper. The question is: What’s one place you two want to have sex?” She asked me, and Dylan’s hand tightened on my cock under this towel and thick comforter, making me bite down on my lips hard to at least attempt to muffle a moan.

“Right here. Right now.” Dylan answered like it was obvious. “Any more questions, Molly?”

And I mean… it fucking was obvious. I could feel him pushing himself harder against me, and considering he hadn’t put any clothes on since waking up, all he was wearing right now was briefs.

Molly was definitely getting the message. Dylan was telling her in the most blunt way possible to fuck on off somewhere, but she maintained her composure just enough to shift her gaze from him to me.

Fucking… fuck! I damn near shouted in my head. I still had to answer, otherwise one of the beer cans Molly was currently holding would be mine to chug half of. At least it wasn’t an action card , I couldn’t help but think.

“I-I-I-” my words were a pretty accurate representation of me being unable to even fucking think clearly.

“ A

Answer, Isiah ,“ Dylan murmured near my ear, making me shut my eyes tight at that. He gave my dick another squeeze, and I couldn’t fucking breathe right anymore.

This had to be some sort of torture practice. Being forced to think with Dylan touching me like this. He had moved that right arm, with his right hand starting to pull the towel away under this comforter.

“ Answer, or… or I’ll pick up the pace ,“ he murmured quietly, for my ears only, and my whole body was starting to shiver into him.

If he said anything the fuck else, I might actually cum. Like right here, right now.

“You’ve got about five seconds to answer before I leave this beer here and flee this room like it’s about to be hit by an air strike,” Molly told me seriously, yet the girl had a knowing smile playing on her lips while a soft moan slipped past mine, barely muffled.

“Th-th-th-the b-beer-” I stammered, just fucking gone at this point. My actual answer at this very moment was the same as Dylan’s. If he slid his briefs down and pushed himself in me right now, all I can say is that there wouldn’t be any protests coming from me. But instead, I damn near croaked out, “j-j-just g-give me th-the f-fucking beer,” and that triumphant smile wasn’t lost on Molly as she rushed the thing over to the bedside table before flying out of this room, closing that door shut on the way out while chirping, “don’t take too long, the game’s only begun! We’ll be downstairs waiting!”

Dylan was already nibbling on the lobe of my left ear, forcing more precum from my tip.

“I-It won’t take long at all… will it, Isiah? “ He whispered hoarsely, giving my dick long, tight strokes. My nails dug into his forearms a bit as I finally let go of controlling these downright deplorable moans. I couldn’t even form a sentence anymore as I felt that intensity slamming against me, bringing me to my breaking point. “ Y-You and I were supposed to shower together ,” he whispered right up against my ear, and my hips started to buck upwards, as much as they could given the hold Dylan had me in, forcing those strokes of his right from my tip to my base.

“D-D-D-Dy-” I tried to get out. I was going to cum. He was going to make me fucking cum like right fucking now.

“Ke-Keep m-moving your hips like this,” he muttered with coarse breaths fanning my left ear, making me a fucking whimpering mess. “S-Since you showered without me, Isiah, today I wanna have some fun.”

I squeezed my eyes shut so goddamn hard, all I could see were stars. Pleasure shot through every fucking channel I had as I started a series of moans I couldn’t fucking help. My body tensed, sending more jolts of raw fucking pleasure through me, but Dylan’s hand shifted to my tip, and he pushed down on it, making me fucking cry out as the intense pleasure was abruptly paused.

“ I didn’t say you could cum yet ,“ he whispered, sending this heart of mine to the goddamn gallows. My body was literally shaking, rocking into him, and though I knew how I’d sound, like I for sure knew how absolutely gone I sounded… I started to fucking beg.

“P-P-Ple- plea-… f-fuck

• D-Dylan- p-pleas-“ I wasn’t sure how to even tell him to keep going without sounding like a beyond-horny, pathetic, degraded mess.

“Y-Yesterday you were in control. Today, I… I want to be,” he told me. “I want to touch you whenever I want, however I want… I want your lips on mine. Constantly. Even if Molly and Helen are around. And-… and every mess you make, I want you to clean it up… if I haven’t already. I’m down to play Molly’s little game… but I want you to play mine as well. Oh, and every fucking shower we take after this morning, we’re taking together. Heavy on that last part, Isiah… got it? “

I nodded against him so goddamn fast I almost pulled a muscle in my neck. Every single word he said had made my whole body completely weak to him. This feeling

• what he was making me feel- how sinfully good it felt- it was one hundred percent going to keep me out of heaven when my time came.

I had no explanation to give god about every single sinful fucking thing his words made me conjure up in my mind.

I had never been this fucking turned on in my entire life, and when Dylan finally released that pressure on my tip, murmuring against my ear, “good… N-Now cum for me, baby, “ I damn near had a heart attack as I came all over his fucking hand and this towel, coating everything in the hot, sticky liquid while my hips spasmed uncontrollably.

Dylan didn’t even try to stop. He kept going, pumping my cock faster now as my moans turned to whimpers, then full-on cries. “ J-Just like that ,“ he whispered roughly against the sensitive skin of my cartilage, jerking me off so hard, my whole body shook against him from his movement.

My cock was a sensitive wreck , but I had zero control over that feeling building again. “ Th-That’s it ,“ Dylan’s voice was tighter now. I could feel him thrusting his hips upward, grinding his hard cock into my ass, with the friction of the towel and his briefs getting tenser as the only barriers between him and I.

His whole body was starting to shiver with me while his harsh grunts filled the spaces of my desperate moans in this otherwise quiet room. I didn’t even know what was and wasn’t possible anymore, because Dylan pulled another orgasm from me like it was fucking nothing, and more cum coated his whole fucking hand as I heard him start to cum himself, his own hot liquid soaking through the material of his briefs and this thin towel.

The tightness of his hold on me was utterly insane. He was the only reason I wasn’t convulsing like a damn fish out of water as that unreal pleasure made my fucking ears ring.

But if nothing else, Dylan was a man of his word. He removed his hand from my cock, his breaths only getting harder, matching my own as he brought his coated hand up past the comforter and towel to my lips.

I parted them shamefully fast, allowing him to use my mouth to clean his fingers, forcing me to taste that salty-sweet taste. And the groan Dylan released as he turned his head slightly, his chin still on my shoulder, to intently watch me lick and suck his fingers clean, made me fucking hard all the fuck over again.

It made me want him to do this again. And again. And fucking again.

“Now,” Dylan murmured, “I’m going to go clean myself up. And you have half a can of beer to chug.” His now-clean fingers reached over to the bedside table to tap the unopened can. “Oh, and Isiah?” He whispered to me.

All I had left was enough energy to hum in response. Dylan had milked everything else out of me before he had me clean the stickiness off him.

“Next time Molly asks a question… I want you to answer it.”

It was safe to fucking say that Dylan had meant every single word he had said.

If this was what punishment felt like, I was already thinking of ways I could be a little more disobedient this weekend.

Clearly he took missing that shower with me to heart.

He ended up taking a quick shower himself while I dutifully chugged that entire beer. I knew I only needed to clear half, but with what Dylan and I had just done, I was going to need some liquid courage to face him again.

Liquid courage was also to hopefully help with the questions I was now going to have to answer, per Dylan’s request. I knew he wanted me to answer her first question, but I didn’t even have the bandwidth to begin to think about where I wanted to have sex. I was too busy trying to figure out how to fucking breathe.

After I managed to clean myself up the rest of the way with the towel that would have to be washed, I quickly made it across the hall to the spare room so I could grab a change of clothes.

Dylan joined me in there pretty soon after, sneaking in a quick, unexpected kiss before finding some clothes to change into himself. He took his sweet fucking time watching me change first, though, making me realize that no amount of liquid courage would ever be able to prepare me for what he had in mind this weekend.

And I was right.

As soon as we made it downstairs, with me about as red as a tomato thanks to Dylan’s comments on my body while I changed, I only managed to plop down on the couch for about one whole minute before my boyfriend sat down next to me and pulled me into his lap.

He then turned to Molly, who was pouring her and Helen more of the mimosas she had made in a large carafe earlier, and asked, “What’s the next question?” I could already feel him- the hard-on he had had since I started changing in that bedroom right in front of him. It was now pressing up against my ass through his sweatpants. “I think I’m actually starting to like this game.”

••

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/34b989fba98efe5730ef4fe85661e21bc94b952a/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6e6b7138433053456f424e3334513d3d2d313539363536353134342e313838336536343635353766323032653634313533393238323439332e6a7067)               

Also, here is my sister and my convo this morning cause I had her start Heated Rivalry last night, and she was like “WHERE IS THE RIVALRY?? I WANT TO SEE THEM LOVE/HATE EACH OTHER!”

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/98a6758164e05624469ed268341beab58cc52627/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f487833506e5637684a4f614a55513d3d2d313539363536353134342e313838336536663534623164346339383135343337383637313139342e706e67)               

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/6dbb8e6bde4cc80256ce4cbf945af59d2a753d59/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f3854647437394863482d537268413d3d2d313539363536353134342e313838336536663732396235316362623430363632333938343136322e706e67)               

“Don’t” lol

Too late, Nym. Too late. Go finish the stories you started, bish.

54. Let’s Get Deep

Warning: Explicit Content (kinda, sorta, you be the judge lol)

Damn near 4k words

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Dylan

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/00feb5e23dfc1bc7efe7c91f11b2c23f55765b98/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f486b37646b6d317974316b3054773d3d2d313539363935323135312e3138383365616164623062666230313539373137353537373936312e6a7067)               

I jerked off a total of three times in that shower thanks to Isiah.

Honestly, if it wasn’t for the fact that I genuinely had gotten a bit carried away with how I accosted him this morning, already on a rather glorious high from just how amazing Isiah had been the last 24 hours, I would’ve dragged him off to shower with me.

What we had done with Molly both in and out of the room was definitely more than enough, and Isiah one hundred percent needed a breather… but fucking god, the way he sounded? The way his body fucking trembled against me? Yeah, it had me a hot fucking mess, hence why I had to beat the complete hell out of my meat all while drenching myself in the coldest of water.

God, and how he had-… how he had cleaned my hand-… licked his cum off it…

How his plump ass felt pushing back against me like that…

Isiah was sitting on my lap now, waiting for Molly to dish out the next question, and even though I was trying my damn hardest not to have my raging hard on, which was currently pressed up against the crease of Isiah’s ass, fully distracting him from paying attention to this game… I couldn’t get him out of my head.

He had fucking begged for it this morning…

And that alone changed the whole chemical makeup of my brain.

I mean I had pretty much always been down bad for Isiah… but him agreeing to a game of our own was making me a goddamn mess

• I mean I was already brainstorming ways I could have Molly and Helen entertain themselves, and with how touchy they were being on the couch adjacent to the one Isiah and I were on, I didn’t think it would take a whole lot of convincing.

“Alrighty, so!” Molly jumped in. “For the first question, I answered hot tub as a place I’d like to have sex, and Helen answered back of her Jeep . Next question is…” she trailed off, rummaging through a box of cards before grabbing a seemingly random card. “The level is Deeper, and the question is: What is your favourite kind of foreplay?”

“Molly,” Isiah sighed immediately. “Are all of these questions sexual?”

“ Shhh ,“ I hushed Isiah gently, placing my chin on his right shoulder this time. “Let the tiny woman ask her fun little questions.”

“Tiny is straight nasty work, Dylan, and so completely unwarranted.” Molly shot back, making Helen and me chuckle.

“I think you’re a perfect size,” Helen then reassured the shorter woman, wrapping her hand around her waist to pull her in more. “And I can answer this one first. I love a good makeout session- lots of touching. Foreplay is everything .”

Molly’s face got a lot rosier at that answer, nodding more to herself like she was taking detailed notes on something that was pretty basic. “I’d say the same. I love using tongue, too. Not like a lot of tongue, but some tongue action is nice.”

Helen nodded, agreeing, before both gals looked over and Isiah and I.

“I- uh-” Isiah started, but I interjected for him.

“I like when Isiah takes some liberties with me. I like his hands on my body… his nails biting into my skin when everything gets too heated. His lack of control as his eyes rake meticulously over my build. I mean, how much time do we hav-”

“Th-That’s quite enough,” Isiah stuttered out, squirming a bit in my lap, which just made my hold on his smaller frame tighten.

“ Keep m-moving like that, “ I whispered low near his ear, “ and I’ll start doing a

hell

of a lot more showing than telling .“

Isiah gripped the arms wrapped around him hard, shuddering from my words alone.

“What about you, Isiah?” Molly asked, clearly unaware of the internal struggle Isiah was enduring on my lap. He tried to clench his legs together, attempting to hide his growing bulge, which I got a clear visual of as my gaze dropped lower, but all that did was make me release the shakiest of breaths, causing him to still.

“I…. I-I, uh-… I… I… I like like… e-everything?” He offered, turning that head of his back slightly towards mine.

“What kind of bullshit answer is that?” Molly demanded, making me grin. “Specifics, or you drink, my love.”

“ Go on ,“ I murmured gently to him. “Tell them what you like.”

I couldn’t help but think that these questions were fucking glorious . Molly was coming in clutch today.

“I… I like-… like when Dylan like… t-talks to me-… l-like… l-like when he, like tells me how much he like- he likes it.”

I felt Isiah shiver again as my dick twitched below him. That admission was putting all the jerking off I’d done to shame.

“Oh, so you’re a yapper in the bedroom, Dylan?” Molly asked, making me roll my eyes at her playfully.

“Sounds like he likes to talk Isiah through it,” Helen clarified with a knowing smile. She absolutely had the right idea. “That’s pretty hot, I can’t lie.”

“ Well done ,“ I whispered lightly near Isiah’s ear, letting him know I meant fucking business when I told him he had to answer the next question. “What else you got for us, Molls?” I then asked our dear friend here.

This was the best idea this shorter woman ever had.

“I swear to god, Molly, if the next question is sexual, you and I are going to have to take this outside.”

“Oh, calm your horses,” Molly teased with a smile, before she stuck her hand back in that box of cards. I was already making every prayer imaginable to every deity I could think of, wishing the next card was even more exciting than the last. “Ice breaker!” Molly then proclaimed to the group of us.

“ Thank fuck ,“ Isiah muttered under his breath, making me grin like crazy.

“The question is: What is your favourite season?”

“Easy. Isiah likes the fall. His go-to is pumpkin spiced anything,” I replied for my boyfriend.

“And Dylan likes winter. His love for Christmas is unwavering.” Isiah countered, which only made this insane smile of mine grow as my hold tightened on him.

“Aw, you two are so sweet! How about you, Molly?” Helen asked.

“Summer!” She proclaimed, before side-eyeing Isiah and I. “I don’t know who in their right mind would have winter, especially in NYC, as their favourite anything.”

“Oh shit, I was actually going to say winter is mine too,” Helen confessed…

And you would’ve thought someone had a gun pointed at Molly’s head from just how quickly she backtracked, making us all bust out laughing. Regardless of what she tried to convince Helen of, I knew that girl’s true heart, and I especially knew how much she hated having to deal with the snow, even if she didn’t drive.

What I was more focused on, however, was just what that box had in store for us next. Unfortunately, Molly had decided we needed to get a bit more tipsy, and ended up pouring Isiah and I more of the mimosa she had made this morning, handing them to us like it was the only logical answer.

At least the time was now around noon, putting us in the day drinking territory and subsequently removing us from borderline alcoholics since she had us starting at fucking eight in the goddamn morning.

After making sure Isiah and I finished our drinks, we then continued this game.

“Alright! Next question! Aaaaaand we got another Ice Break-”

“ Pick again ,“ I told Molly quickly, which earned me one massive eye roll from the shorter gal.

“Settle your horniness, you mess of a man. We’re supposed to be learning more about each other here,” Molly then scolded me.

“But I already know everything about Isiah,” I whined in return.

“Oh, is that so?” She countered, before looking down at the card she pulled. “Well, do you know what accent he finds the coolest?”

That had me glancing at Isiah quick, who by now was getting far more comfortable with being on my lap… but his answer to that question would definitely be changing things.

“I-Irish,” he answered hesitantly, his head turning my way to give me a glance. I loved resting my chin on his shoulder like this, getting a front row view of his nerves. “You… you picked up a bit of an Irish accent when you got back a-and-… a-and I like it.”

Isiah shivered yet again when he felt my dick twitch. “ Good answer ,“ I found myself murmuring more to him, before looking Molly’s way again. “I like Isiah’s born-and-raised Brooklyn accent. And also,” I added, turning to Isiah again, “there’s no way in hell I can take you to Ireland now. I don’t want you falling for some handsome stud out there.”

Isiah chuckled, shaking his head a little. “I promise you, you have nothing to worry about that. If anything, I-… I think I’d just fall for you harder.”

Molly had asked Helen what her favourite accent was, but I had checked out completely at that point because Isiah had started to lightly brush his fingers along the veins of my arms still wrapped around him, and right now I was already working on an exit strategy for us.

We all sat with each other for a few hours, playing this game. After much pushback on my end, Molly finally started pulling more Deep and Deeper cards instead of the bullshit Ice Breakers. Isiah and I were well past most of those questions anyways, such as “what was the greatest decade for fashion?”

Nineties, easily. Both Isiah and I agreed on that.

The only question worth a damn was “What are you most scared of?”

And to that, I let Isiah answer freely, but didn’t waste a second whispering, “thank you. For yesterday. Seriously… thank you.” He had answered spiders or some shit, but I knew what his biggest fear was. The dark. And knowing he had to brace that yesterday pissed me off.

One of our many, many secrets was that I didn’t really give a shit about a night light… but I started conditioning my dad to switch one on every night so Isiah never had to deal with the dark when he came over. He didn’t like admitting this to anyone but Molly- what his real fear was- and I vowed to myself that I’d never put him in the position to.

There was one question that did almost make me drag Isiah to a private place, however. It was a question for a Deep card that asked, “What advice would you give yourself 5 years ago?”

And Isiah’s answer was, “not to be so afraid… I just-” he turned to me slightly. “I… I just wish I had been honest sooner… about like how I felt. I think I knew I felt different with Dylan from the very first day I met him in fifth grade.”

“Really?” I asked Isiah gently. At this point, if I held him any tighter against me, I was going to crush him. My left arm did release his waist, but that was so I could raise my left hand to his chin, turning his face more towards me.

“Y-Yeah,” he mumbled quietly. And I couldn’t help but bring my lips down to his. God, I loved him so fucking much.

And shit, it probably was the beer and mimosas because I was feeling a solid buzz, which only made me want to take this kiss a hell of a lot further.

We did pause this getting to know you game at some point so I could force everyone to get started on dinner around four in the afternoon. The girls wanted to jump in the hot tub but there was no way they’d be sober enough to help Isiah and I cook if they did, and I just knew the liquor was going to make them hungry at some point.

On tonight’s menu was a shrimp scampi. Isiah was preparing the shrimp while I put these two tipsy girls on what I thought would be the easiest thing in the world: pasta duty.

They would very soon prove me wrong, however…

“D-D-Dylan,” Isiah whispered, making me hold him by his waist all the tighter. “Peeling shrimp… feels like a one-person job.”

“ What did we talk about this morning? “ I whispered back, pressing the hard on I had had all damn day right up against his lower back, as Isiah focused those shaky fingers on detailing. “Or would you like me to take more liber-” I started as my hand started to slip lower than just his lower stomach, my fingers finding their way to the top button of his jeans…

But my words were fucking cut off when I started to smell smoke, forcing Isiah and I to turn around from the kitchen island to see what the fuck was burning.

“Molly!” I called to the young gal who was supposed to be watching the damn pasta, pulling away from Isiah completely to see just what the hell was going on. Molly and Helen were getting all touchy touchy against the dining room table, with Helen’s hands in some rather mischievous places.

The wine was definitely hitting for them. And while I was Molly’s #1 supporter after she switched up the level of difficulty for these cards, burning down the kitchen wasn’t something I could overlook.

“How the hell are you going to put pasta in a sauce pot with no water?” I asked this woman as I moved quick to take the now-burning pasta off the stove.

Molly took her sweet time separating herself from Helen to look at where I was gesturing.

Her eyes grew wide… like she wasn’t the goddamn culprit to begin with. “I… could’ve sworn I definitely put water in that.” The girl insisted, but her face was rosy from whatever she and Helen had been doing, and all I had left in me was to simply shoo the lovestruck girls away.

We were not about to burn this cabin down with us still the fuck in it.

And honestly, I didn’t mind. Instead, the girls decided to head upstairs and get changed into their swimsuits, leaving Isiah and I alone indefinitely…

So, of course, after opening up a whole new, unburnt box of noodles and placing them on the table, before pulling out and filling up a different saucepan with water to place on the stove, I was right back behind Isiah, extending my arms on either side of him so I could help him move a few bowls around for the remaining shrimp. All while quite literally nuzzling my nose into his soft, short curls.

He probably got like two shrimp peeled in peace… then I tilted my head slightly, deciding quickly that whatever marks I left on his chest just weren’t enough anymore. And that was when my lips finally connected with his neck, and I expected a little pushback because at this point, Isiah had to be sick of me…

But he tilted his head immediately, allowing this, but also dropping all the shrimp he was in the process of detailing.

“D-Dyl-Dy-” he fucking moaned. Like loudly

• far louder than I was expecting, forcing me to realize that perhaps… perhaps the liquor was affecting more than just Molly and Helen. I hadn’t even noticed how much he was feeling it until Isiah abruptly turned around and started to drop to his knees.

I was quicker than that, though. And while his lips on my cock was something I would never say no to on any other day… today I was the one in charge here. And I made sure he felt that when I lifted him, pinning him between my hips and the kitchen island. That crimson face of his and lowered eyelids coerced me to bring my left hand to the waist of his jeans as I damn near crashed my lips against his now swollen ones.

He had been biting them this whole afternoon, and the way he gasped into this heated kiss as I undid his jeans button, his zipper, and forced my hand down his pants was fucking everything.

I hadn’t expected how fucking wet his briefs already were, though.

“I-Isiah-” I murmured as I started to stroke his cock hard. “Y-You’re so fucking slick down here already.”

“D-D-… w-w-wai-” he choked out against this kiss, but there was no way in fucking hell I was stopping now. The buzz from the liquor had me even more fucking horny than I thought. Isiah reached out to grip the front of my shirt tight once I pulled away from this kiss to finish what the fuck I had started on this neck of his, nipping and biting at the soft skin, which made Isiah’s moans turn to immediate whimpers.

“D-D-D-” he stuttered yet again, only forcing my hand to move quicker.

“You don’t cum until I say so, Isiah. Hold it ,” I whispered back with a voice I couldn’t even recognize. Isiah started to tremble again, his whimpers turning desperate, searching for a release I had deprived him of for most of this afternoon.

But I had meant every fucking second of what I said, and Isiah damn near collapsed into me once I let go of him and pulled my hands out of his jeans abruptly. I felt him stumble forward, still shaking, but the door to one of the bedrooms upstairs had opened, and I could hear the girls starting to head downstairs.

Isiah, however?

He looked the hottest I think I had ever fucking seen him… and when those needy, desperate, glossed over eyes finally found the courage to look up at me… I swear to god I almost said fuck it to the girls seeing… but that was a little too much.

This… how Isiah was now… was one hundred percent for my eyes only.

“Hey! You two go change. Helen and I will finish up the pasta, then meet you at the hot tub. The shrimp is just getting tossed in that butter sauce you made that’s simmering, right, Dylan?”

“Yeah… we’ll be down in one second,” I answered rather hesitantly… but, I mean, the girls were now in their bikinis and weren’t stumbling around, so I trusted them to finish up while I dragged Isiah off upstairs.

And if it wasn’t for the fact that I still didn’t trust them not to burn anything, I would’ve taken care of Isiah right here and now as we first made it to the spare room to change. There wasn’t even any hiding it- how hard he and I both were- and the swim trunks we quickly grabbed from our bags to change into left nothing to the imagination for either of us.

Still, I forced myself not to waste time because if I came back to an actual fire needing to be put out, that was going to ruin the entire mood. And while Molly was indeed a mess… she was still our mess, ya know?

After dinner was done, with all of us just taking portions from the main pot, putting only enough in our stomachs to handle the liquor better, we placed the food in the fridge and headed out to the hot tub through the back screen door that led to the porch.

It was chilly as fuck outside for sure. All of us pretty much had to do a sprint out there to climb into the hot water before we froze our fucking toes off. Molly managed to grab us all towels that she then placed on the hanging rack next to the deck, before we each settled into the water that had been set to a perfect temperature.

The sun had already started setting, but the porch out here had these beautiful string lights hung on poles located at each corner of the hot tub, and with a beer placed in everyone’s hands as we eased ourselves into the hot water, I quickly realized just how badly we all needed this.

“Isiah, I want you to blink twice if you need any saving,” Molly said, chuckling to herself as she eyed Isiah and I. He was currently in my lap while we sat at one side of the jacuzzi, and Helen and Molly relaxed on the other.

I currently had my head comfortably tucked into the crook of Isiah’s neck, leaving more hickeys in place of the ones that were fading. “I think he likes it here,” I mumbled against Isiah’s skin, feeling him grind his ass even harder back against my dick. His hand had long since pushed his swim trunks down some, before doing the same with mine, and right now my cock was pressed up right at his fucking entrance.

I had asked to be in control today… but here he was… making me internally battle with whether or not we could take anything further.

“Hey Molly,” I practically all but moaned out. “You and Helen should go pour yourselves more wine.”

Those words were absolutely a direct order, and Molly just giggled to herself as she separated herself from Helen and gestured for the gal to follow her. “Come on, let’s leave these two alone. They’ve indulged in our game long enough, and plus, I’m freaking starving .”

“Don’t forget to drink water!” I made sure to add, pulling away from Isiah for a second, because I couldn’t even remember when they last had a sip of good ol’ H2O.

But I was already turning Isiah around while the girls exited the hot tub, making sure he felt every fucking bit of how hard he was getting me. It was his next words, however, that stunned the hell out of me.

“I do,” he murmured, bringing those lips of his just a hair’s length away from mine. The warm lighting from these strong lights was making his wet skin look fucking incredible. “I-… I love it here, Dylan… w-with you…” he whispered lightly. “I… I love you like this…”

“I-… I have been going back and forth with myself on what I should and shouldn’t ask for,” I told Isiah. My voice was rough as shit from all the edging Isiah was unknowingly doing by the way he moved his hips, giving me the sexiest fucking lap dance for the last few hours… but I still forced myself to pull it the fuck together. “And while I-… I don’t think sex would be a good idea with us this tipsy… but would it-…. Would it be okay if we took things a bit further-… like i-if I touched mo-”

I didn’t even get through that request before I saw Isiah nod. “Y-Ye-Yes-” he choked out quickly. “L-Let’s… l-let’s go to the b-bedroom.”

And the way he said that alone had me tugging his and my own swim trunks up quickly, before I straight lifted him up out of this bubbling water by the firmest hold I now had on his ass.

••

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/87654b3a92e14df6d6cbe45a5fa0140ee113beb0/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f78775f705f4b61686a53747337413d3d2d313539363935323135312e313838343465376333363931303763383830343430303636323234372e6a7067)

55. Rest In Pieces

Alrighty folks

First off, Happy New Year!! <3

I am wishing you all an abundance of love and prosperity for this new year, xoxo

Also, I’ve got the last 8 chapters written so it’s rapid fire uploads today! Just make sure you check to see which chapter you’re on when you open the notifications lol

We have one hell of a ride left, so… brace yourselves

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Upload 1/8 today

Carson

I waited patiently for Don to return to bed. It was now damn near almost four in the morning, but I had heard his phone ringing on his side of the bedside table in this hotel room, stirring me awake, then felt that handsome man detach himself from me slightly to reach over and pick it up.

There was only one person who could ever get ahold of Don at this time, so I knew it was Dylan before Don even answered, but the slight panic in his voice worried me as he got up and quietly left the room to continue the call.

What concerned me even more was how long it took him to get back to me.

We had had such a nice, uninterrupted day until Don got the call from Janice while we were on our way to La Belle for dinner last night.

At first, both he and I were seriously confused as Don’s phone screen lit up in the center console of my SUV while I drove, his phone having long since been connected to my car’s Bluetooth, even though I was positive that was like eight thousand different privacy violations for our company.

At this point, Don and I came as a pair. Getting calls this way was easier because I drove him literally everywhere anyway, and the guy genuinely didn’t give a fuck what I heard about his work. He knew not even eight years between us brought me any closer to understanding his job. The only calls that were removed from the car’s speaker were whenever Brad phoned him.

And I had long since been perfectly fine with that. It was the few bits of privacy he had to preserve.

This call in particular, though… he actually picked up the damn thing only for us to hear nothing but music and loud cheering in the background. I had no idea what the hell was happening, but I did eventually hear Janice screaming through my car’s speakers, “he’s dead! Oh praise be to the most fucking high , that asshole is finally fucking dead! “

And honestly, the way Don’s lips curled up into a smile as he sat as my passenger prince during the drive, was reassuring. Like really reassuring, making the dinner we eventually made it to, all the more special at our favourite restaurant.

But then Don took this call dead in the middle of the night, and I honestly didn’t know what to think anymore. Dylan being up at this time, and needing his father-… it just couldn’t be a good sign. I didn’t know if Don would return, telling me we had to leave early.

I waited patiently for him, though, with my keys on the bedside in case I had to put some clothes on. Genuinely speaking, I was still dazed from the explosive fucking sex we had right after dinner, starting from my car in the back lot of La Belle… then ending right here back at this hotel room.

Tonight felt like a night where we might switch, something we did every now and then because I liked it both ways with my husband- I liked it every fucking way with that man- but his exact words to me were, “in honor of that shithead finally dropping dead… I want to feel your cock buried so deep inside me it rearranges my fucking insides.”

And judging by the noise complaint we were absolutely going to get come morning… I think I delivered on just that.

At least nothing was broken in this hotel room, because fuck this man wanted it and me on everything, and in every single way tonight. All the positions. Multiple rounds. You’d think he just discovered some routing and bank account numbers to millionaire’s accounts in the Cayman Islands, not that he heard the news that his father had finally died.

I wasn’t sure how Don would handle the call with Dylan about that… whether he was going to tell him… but I sure as shit wasn’t expecting him to return with glossed-over eyes, and tear-stained cheeks.

“Is everything okay?” I sat up further in bed quickly, turning on the dim lamp on the bedside table near me to get a better look at him.

“Dylan’s okay now. Just a nightmare. I… I spoke with Bellington after,” he replied, getting me up the rest of the way in an instant.

“The hell did he-” I started, before cutting myself off.

Shit…

Shit…

“Don’t tell me he-…”

Don slowly nodded. This was something I didn’t know how to necessarily process… even though it sorta made sense. The cause of death was a heart attack, which I thought was crazy because Don went into great, vivid detail about our sex life every year we visited that shithead, and the way that unnecessarily angered his father?

Yeah, his heart should’ve failed years ago from that stress alone.

“I’m… are you-… are you… okay with that?”

Don slowly nodded again. “I… think so, yeah. We’ll stop by and pick up his ashes on our way back into NYC tomorrow afternoon. I should probably have Dylan come straight home, too. I haven’t told him anything about it yet since he’s supposed to be enjoying himself, and ended up having a nightmare tonight, which I know will already throw him off for the weekend.”

I gave Don a nod as he climbed back into bed, burrowing his body deep under the covers. His skin felt so cold; he must’ve taken the call with Bellington while out on the terrace.

All that did was give me the most perfect excuse to be as close as humanly possible to him now, while Don curled up into my warmth like a damn cat. It was so freaking cute when he got like this- getting even closer.

And I loved nothing more than to be a safe place for him. I could feel the tension quite literally easing itself out of his rigid body, allowing him to relax.

This was him choosing to rest. This was how he gave up control over everything, letting me take the lead when he needed weight off his shoulders, and so far, I had gotten it right the past eight years when he needed to release his iron grip on things.

“Today,” I whispered to him as he settled, “we’re going to enjoy our little getaway, too. We’re going to get up in a few hours and get breakfast at the cafe downstairs, then we’ll head to my parents’. I want to show you my old high school as well, the seniors have a game tonight.”

“A game?” Don questioned. He was damn near wearing my skin at this point, but I just held him tighter.

“Yep. Football. And if you pay attention to the whole entire game like a good little lad, I’ll have a reward for you after.”

“Reward?” He questioned, tilting his head up from my chest towards me with more interest, to which I nodded. “What kind of reward?”

“Well… I could either pay for dinner afterward… or I could eat you instead. I’ll do that thing with my tong-”

“ I’ll pay for dinner ,“ Don offered quick as hell.

“Good. Then be good and get some rest. We already made sweet, sweet love tonight… repeatedly , but I can go one more round if that helps you relax. I’ll go as many rounds as you need, love.”

Don chuckled lightly, and the feeling of his long eyelashes brushing gently against the bare skin of my chest brought me all too much fucking peace. Him in my arms always felt so right between us-… the way he always molded into me. “ Go the fuck to bed, Carson . I’ll sort out your ridiculous sex drive in the AM.“

“That’s my issue with being with you, Don… I’m always horny,” I replied, making Don chuckle again as he flicked my bare chest with his pointer finger and thumb. I reached over while he was still in my arms, so I could turn off the bedside lamp I had switched on.

It was always difficult for this man to say more about Bellington. He was someone I had never met, even through all eight years of Don and me being together. And so one could imagine my sheer surprise when I heard my husband say his next soft admission while in my arms, just further proving that this husband of mine still had the most insane timing to drop complete bombs on me out of nowhere.

“Bellington will be joining us for New Years in New York City this year.”

I almost fucking choked up a lung, and if it wasn’t for the fact Don had just gotten comfy on me, I probably would’ve sat us both up in this fucking bed.

“A-A-Are you serious?” I asked him quickly. Don nodded, rubbing his cheek against my skin.

“I’ve delayed you meeting him for far too long. And he already knows everything about you and Dylan. I think it would… it would be nice-… if you both met him. He sent over a gift for Dylan and Isiah, and honestly, I… I don’t even know how to begin to describe it. I’ll explain once we get home.”

Shit, all I could fucking do was nod at that, tilting my head lower to kiss this handsome man’s forehead.

“How… how much about me does he know exactly?”

“Everything,” Don replied, which I knew shouldn’t have surprised me… that was until he added, “he knows about this little trip we’re on, Carson… so just assume he knows everything.”

Having someone like this so close to Don… it felt dangerous somehow… but I had made the executive decision long ago to fully accept this side of him. I had told him I wouldn’t judge the man he once was, and these apartments- The Brookside Apartments- this was his step in the right direction to not change the past, but grow from it.

Something told me that call with Bellington had changed something major for the two of them, but as I gazed down at my husband resting his head on my chest while curled up into my side, simply basking in his beauty even with such little lighting seeping into this room… I realized that Don would explain it eventually.

He always did. What he could, anyway.

And even if my husband didn’t approve of one more round tonight, I made the executive decision that come morning, he was getting his reward first. Something earned , as he and I liked to say.

So… we had definitely slept in.

In fact, the only thing that actually woke us up was Don’s phone ringing again.

Dylan had called closer to ten in the morning just to check in, letting us know he was doing okay. Don and I were completely tucked into these covers, enjoying the warmth and comfort this five-star hotel was giving us, but he still managed to pull it somewhat together so he could do his fatherly duties over the phone.

As soon as that call was coming to a close, I got out a quick “love you, Dyl!” To Dylan, then I was pulling this man right back into me.

“We-… w-we gotta start the day at some point, Carson,” he mumbled, but his voice was rougher from both sleep and from what I currently had pressed against his ass, reminding him that what we had done last night was the farthest from over.

“ Who decided that shit? “ I countered, running my nose against the nape of this man’s neck, and relishing in the slight shivers he released in return.

“ You did , you fucking idiot,“ Don reminded me. “Gave me a whole play-by-play for the day, remember? And right now my stomach’s deciding it because I’m starving.”

“ I’m hungry for something else, “ I murmured, dropping my voice lower. Don immediately shuddered at that, allowing me to tighten this solid hold I had on his waist.

“O-Of course you f-fucking are-” he tried to get out, but those damn actions of his… he was already pressing that perfect ass back against my hardening dick.

“Remember what you promised last night…” I reminded him. “Something about quenching my undying thirst, if I recall correctly.”

“The information you ch-choose to remember is i-insane,” he muttered. “You’ll remember that shit, yet claim we’ve been together a decade.”

“Technically, it’s been thirteen years, Don,” I whined against his sensitive skin, hoping to seduce him with the slow, deliberate hip thrusts I was now giving him, feeling each other through the material of our thin briefs. “I’m even rounding down , not up .”

“Thirteen my fuck- fffuck- my f-fucking ass-” Don struggled to get out. My hands had started to travel lower, feeling more of where I really wanted to taste right now. All this talk of years was semantics to me.

“I’ll be quick… then we can order room service up and talk about the last 24 hours,” I negotiated, feeling a protest coming on from Don at first… that was until my hand reached for a part of him that definitely seemed to like that game plan, and Don tried but failed to stifle a moan, giving me an answer to my demands.

And I was quick as shit to flip this man on his back, ready to show him just how good I was at taking care of him. Just how well I knew every inch of his body.

Don was now sitting in bed, a hot, sweaty, sticky mess, eating his toast while I scarfed down a yogurt parfait next to him.

Judging by the work I put in, that blissful smile he had on his flushed face was wholeheartedly warranted.

I somewhat expected a noise complaint to come with our breakfast, but the hotel staff just brought up our meal and told us to fully enjoy our stay… so either they knew who the hell was on my reservation for this room with me… or they simply didn’t care.

I was going to run with the former because they didn’t even bring up a check. They said all our meals had been completely covered for the remaining time we had here. But then again, I also had suspicions that this was Bellington’s doing.

I still hadn’t forgotten what Don had said. that he even knew about this trip.

But right now, I had just recovered from the coughing fit Don had sent me into when he revealed what that old man had gifted those two graduating rascals.

He literally knocked the wind right out my lungs.

“Th-that’s insane , Don. Seriously… like I don’t even know how those two will handle it.”

“I hope it’ll soften whatever news of my dad’s passing will bring on. I know Dylan never met the fucker… but I do owe him some honesty. And he deserves to know what happened with Harry- that that man will never hurt him again… I just don’t know how to tell him.”

That news was the first thing Don told me while I set up our breakfast on this bed, and I swear he almost made me drop this whole tray on the white comforter.

Whatever suspicions I had were right. About that phone call meaning more.

I understood why Don had called him. And it wasn’t just about his dad. I don’t think that call was ever made because of his dad. I think my husband saw the opportunity to make sure someone who hurt his son could never get the opportunity to do so again, and making a request like that in the first place?

That wasn’t an easy decision for my husband.

He wasn’t who he once was. He wasn’t damaging the lives of innocent people. He had simply used what he had in that artillery of his to protect Dylan, and while I didn’t- while I couldn’t say I agreed with what Bellington did- taking care of it without my husband’s approval- I knew more of the world Don was once in now. Any opportunity he allowed me to peel back a bit of that veil, I took with strides.

I knew more of what the Ivanov’s were involved in, too. And, subsequently, why Don kept his distance.

My husband had gradually let me in on the months leading up to our wedding, giving me somewhat of an understanding of why John had told Don not to get involved back then with Harry. To make sure he handled everything legally. It had to look absolutely perfect on paper for him because of the way people constantly dug.

My husband held onto every bit of privacy he could.

And if anyone could’ve handled this particular mess- if anyone had the power to actually make those imperfections with how things were handled, simply go away- it was Bellington, for better or worse.

“Oh, this is good,” Don mumbled to himself with a blissful smile still on that pretty little face of his. His mood had definitely improved after our morning workout because he had offered up all this information about as casually as one would talk about the damn weather. “Oh, and Bellington mentioned something else in his email that I wanted to talk to you about. Regarding Texas.”

At this point, I was simply at Don’s disposal. If he felt like giving me multiple freaking heart attacks this morning after delivering back-to-back on some of the best sex we’ve ever had together… I was just going to have to eat those blows.

“Lay it on me, beautiful.” I gave Don a reassuring smile and let him feed me a sausage link before he continued.

The fact that I really thought I was going to last any amount of time with Collin, with him being fully vegan, was seriously wild. It was actually probably the most insane idea I had ever had. Like Don and I at least kept those venison sausages stocked in the freezer. At all times . And with Hob’s death anniversary coming up at the end of November, we’d be due for Don’s Dublin Lawyer dish soon, something we made a family event of each year before visiting his grave with a bottle of Teeling Irish whiskey. Hob’s favourite.

“He told me to reevaluate Texas. That, while the disagreement between him and Kenneth was a mutual understanding, apparently, he still trusted the Jones name. So now I’ve got to ask…” Don tilted my head up towards me again after taking a bite of his eggs, “Just what the actual fuck happened between your grandfather and Bellington?”

I was genuinely too fucking stunned to say anything at all to that one.

“They… they know each other?” I asked Don. “Like… they know each other personally? “

Don slowly nodded. “That’s what it sounds like. And if that’s the case, I’m both confused as to why Kenneth wouldn’t explain that when he and I met for the first time, and how the complete hell he still accepted me into your family after having known more about Theo than I thought.”

“What… what did he mean by that?” I asked. “About you reevaluating Texas?”

“You’ll see,” Don replied, but there was the slightest smile playing on his lips, as he added, muttering, “That old man and his fucking parallels, I swear.”

••

56. When The Party’s Over

Upload 2/8 today!

Isiah

Dylan carried me all the way inside and upstairs, ignoring the tipsy girl’s knowing giggles as his lips stayed locked on mine.

We were still wet from our time in the jacuzzi, but neither he nor I gave a damn, my lips moving feverishly against his while he took the wooden steps leading up to our room two at a time.

I barely even had the time register the multiple spaces we were entering like portals, until Dylan managed to close and lock that bedroom door behind us with one hand, while the other held me up with ease. “ No more interruptions, “ he whispered hard against my lips. He managed to drop me down onto the mattress a few steps away from the door, having my back flush against the soft material and breaking this kiss for about one whole second to do it, before he dropped himself down on it, and his lips were back on mine.

This buzz had left me fucking needy- needing him. I knew what he said about us not really going all the way, and I was happy for that because right now I was a drunk and horny mess, and I wanted our first time to be special- perfect for him.

Based on the research I had done, all that involved prepping… I hadn’t done any of that for tonight.

So I was perfectly fine with us waiting a little longer, even if this kiss he was drowning me in had me second-guessing things.

Dylan’s teeth dragged along my bottom lip, tugging harder. “Sh-Shit- Isiah- ffuck- “ he mumbled against me. “F-Fuck, you’re so- fuck y-you’re so goddamn beautiful-”

The water from the jacuzzi had made my skin cold to touch, but as Dylan pinned my whole body to the mattress, his larger build placing weight down on me to keep me right here- right underneath him- I could feel his body heat start to warm me up.

I felt my hands tighten their hold around Dylan’s neck, pulling him down even harder, and craving that fucking warmth. I could feel the comforter getting soaked below us from our drenched swim trunks, but Dylan was already undoing the drawstring of mine while those deep kisses travelled from my lips down my chin and neck.

I didn’t even get the chance to reach for the drawstring of Dylan’s swim trunks because he was already moving down my body, brushing his warm lips against my chest and collarbone. “D-Dylan-” I couldn’t help but moan as I watched him get lower. My hands slid up into the softest strands of his curly, wet hair, absolutely adoring how they felt against my fingertips, like straight silk.

And maybe it was the liquor, but I was absolutely mesmerized. The dampness of his skin- how the warm lights from the string lights right outside the balcony poured in through the screen doors… “ J-J-Jesus f-fucking Christ -“ I muttered when his light blue eyes looked up to catch mine.

“I-Isiah,” his words melted into my chest. “C-Can I take these o-”

“ Yes ,“ I rushed out fast, giving Dylan whatever green light he wanted. Right now, I didn’t even try to mask my excitement. “P-please, Dylan- don’t-… don’t stop. P-Please don’t f-fucking s-stop -”

I watched as the most beautiful smile spread across Dylan’s face against my upper stomach, as he moved lower and lower. I ended up simply watching as he pulled the wet shorts completely off me, leaving me completely naked on this bed now, and the way Dylan’s eyes darkened at the sight of my painfully hard dick- the flushed red tip alone let him know just how extreme I felt this depravity.

“G-God, you-… f-fuck, Isiah -” Dylan grunted out, easing himself back down onto my lower half as he brought his head just over my dick. It was resting against my lower stomach, already making my light, golden treasure trail hairs there slick with precum. “ B-Bend your knees, “ he then whispered with a raspiness that made me sharply fucking inhale.

I did what I was told, raising my legs up and bending my knees so they rested comfortably on either side of Dylan’s head, feeling the softness of his hair against the sensitive inner parts of my thighs.

Cold droplets of water from those long, shaggy, wet curls fell to my bare skin around the base of my cock, and ran down the length of my inner thighs, making me shudder at the insane sensation mixing in with my drunker state. The liquor paired with this had me feeling lightheaded as shit, but I welcomed all of it as my chest rose and fell with my shallow breaths.

My grip on the cotton below me tightened once I watched him wrap his right arm under the space of my bent left leg, reaching around for my cock, all while his left hand lifted right where he was lying, between me, to bring a finger to his mouth.

Shit-

My body was damn near burning, watching him slip a finger past his soft lips into his mouth as I waited in pure fucking anticipation for what was coming next.

He hadn’t even touched my dick yet, but it twitched as soon as he laid his large left hand on my stomach, right above the mess it was making. The hold was strong, stopping me from shifting anywhere.

Those cutting, darkened eyes of his were dragging up and down my naked body, making whatever internal temperature I was feeling all the more intense.

Once Dylan removed that long, pointer finger from his mouth, coating it in his own spit, he mumbled breathless to me, “c-can I-”

I didn’t even let him finish that before I rushed out another, “ y-y-yes- fuck, D-Dylan- y-yes -“

Dylan chuckled, a rough, coarse laugh, while those lips of his curved up into a smile. He lowered his left hand, comfortably dipping it lower past my dick, but the part that had me unexpectedly gasping for air was when he wrapped his right hand around my cock and started a ridiculously slow pace, stroking me.

“Sh-sh-sh-shit-sh-” I stammered, not even beginning to wrap my mind around how unbelievable this felt, feeling that instant pleasure swarm through, overriding all of my damn senses like hardware.

And somehow I thought that this was it- that there wasn’t any possible way this could get any better than this… that was until I felt that warm, wet finger gently start to prod my overly sensitive entrance, Dylan’s heavier breaths now mixing in with my quickly spiraling moans as the forearm of the hand that was stroking me, placed more pressure down on my pelvic area to hold me still.

“Y-You like that, I-Isiah?”

“Y-Y-Yes-” I breathed out. My whole body was starting to quiver as Dylan picked up the pace. That finger was gentle yet firm as it pressed just past the tightness of my entrance. His eyes kept shifting between mine and the astounding work those talented hands were doing, but once that finger slowly pushed past the tightness, his gaze held mine.

“I-I-Is th-this okay-” he started, still checking in. And I appreciated the ever-loving fuck out of that because this was definitely new for me. And him. Us , rather.

There was still that voice in the back of my head that told me maybe this was too much for us… but Dylan had gone out of his way time and time again to make sure everything was alright. He had always checked in, and so I told that voice inside my head to just shut the fuck up right now.

I didn’t want to ruin another intimate moment for us by not trusting him- not trusting that he wanted this.

So I nodded my head quickly, since words right now were just not a thing for me at all.

He hadn’t pushed his finger in too far, just to his second joint or so, maybe, which was good because I was already self-conscious about taking every precaution I could to make sure it was perfect inside me for him, but that alone was leaving me a panting wreck.

And Dylan only decided to double this pleasure by doubling his finger, slowly adding another past my entrance to join his first as he rushed out, “I-I-Is this-”

I damn near fucking cried out once I felt that fullness overtake me, feeling Dylan start to pick up the strokes with that large hand wrapped around my length, and I was sure my head nodded to him, but I was so far fucking gone by this feeling that I couldn’t even tell what I was doing anymore.

That feeling that was building up inside, however. I couldn’t comprehend just how fucking hard it was going to hit until I felt it fucking vibrate through me. “D-D-Dy-D-” I breathed. My legs were starting to shake, my thighs closing in around Dylan’s head, but once Dylan lowered his head, placing my dick inside his mouth, I couldn’t get a warning out with enough time.

And perhaps I didn’t even fucking have to, because Dylan used his now available left hand to quickly put some weight down in my stomach, holding me flat against this mattress while I unexpectedly came into his mouth. 

One of my hands released that death grip on the comforter to shoot up to my mouth, quickly trying to muffle whatever insane moans this sensation had ushered from my lips, because even while the girls downstair definitely knew Dylan and I weren’t coming up here just to talk, the embarrassment of how loud I got as I came was too much for my weak heart to bear. My head would not be held high when facing them come sun up.

“ J-J-Jesus fucking Christ, Isiah ,“ Dylan got out, mumbling against my burning skin after he swallowed my cum, slipping his fingers out in the process to kiss his way up towards me. One of his arms moved to hold him up on this mattress, but the other was undoing his own drawstring for his shorts, pushing them down in the process.

I felt his own warm body mesh against the skin of mine, and once those shorts were off, I felt his free hand slide under my back, making a space between it and the wet comforter, then he quickly rolled us over.

“C-Come here,” he whispered, the very last thing I heard him say before his lips were on mine. His left hand glided into my hair to hold me down for a kiss that made my erratic heart want to just throw in the towel.

And I found myself kissing him back just as feverishly, tucking my bent, shaky legs in so I could straddle his waist as his dick pressed up against mine. He pulled my bottom lip in urgently… his hands held the strands of my own short curls tight so I wouldn’t escape this kiss even if I tried.

And I knew for damn sure I wasn’t even going to attempt to. There wasn’t a part of me not giving into him, making me start to grind my cock right up against his. My own hands had tangled into this kiss, and he used this kiss to almost silence the moans we were both releasing from this skin-to-skin contact.

Dylan’s right hand, which was still on my lower back, started moving down lower and lower, approaching my ass before he gripped it firmly, and drove my lower half into him harder.

The frazzled, drunker state I was in made my actions hasty and somewhat directionless as that craving for release built again, but the fucking grip Dylan’s large hand had was what gave it the little direction our movements were.

This was absolutely beyond the parameters of the word hot . This was fucking mind-numbing at this point, making all my thoughts focus in on rocking my hips harder.

I couldn’t even tell when it was I felt his hand release that tight hold on my ass, slithering into the spread open area to find my wet entrance, but when he started to push a finger into me a little faster, accompanied by an unexpected second one, I had to quickly break this kiss. I buried my head into the crook of Dylan’s neck, trying to avoid biting his lips from the intensity, and instead bit down into the skin there as I came again.

Dylan suddenly pushed those two fingers in deeper, with the walls of my inside clamping down on him from my orgasm.

And when I felt his body suddenly tense as he grunted low, feeling his own cum spill out and coat both his stomach and mine, my whole body felt that electric shock rock my nerves even harder.

His voice had been so raw. Those groans he made, forcing my cock to rock against his by the pressure he placed inside me, had him tucking his own head up into my neck to simply try to silence the climax of his own build-up.

This time around, we didn’t even manage to say anything, besides the swear words we muttered into each other’s skin.

No one had to vocally reassure the other that this was good… because it was way fucking more than just good . The shaking my body and his meshed into each other let me know just how much better than simply good it really was.

Just how fucking phenomenal this had felt, with us together like this.

A new first that didn’t need any reassurance.

I didn’t remember falling asleep… but we had apparently fallen asleep just like this because that was how I woke up the next morning.

Me still on top of Dylan.

Us fully naked.

The lighting from outside indicated it was morning, but his slow breaths let me know he was still fast asleep with both arms wrapped around me tight, holding me like a stuffed bear.

I didn’t want to wake him… so I just let myself drift back off to sleep, listening to his breathing while I felt his slow heartbeat against my body…

Once Dylan eventually stirred away was when I finally did. And that was because we could hear some bustling afoot in the kitchen downstairs.

“ G=Good morning, Isiah, “ he mumbled into the sensitive skin of my neck, nuzzling himself further into it.

“G-Good- good morning, Dylan,” I murmured back as I slowly untucked my head from its resting spot.

“Let’s go take a shower,” he whispered quietly as he soon did the same. “I-… I want to take a walk with you before we have to pack.”

My whole body was buzzing with warmth from the night before and my morning with this handsome motherfucker.

The shower we took together wasn’t sexually charged at all- not like the intimacy we had the night before.

Instead, Dylan was tender and intentional as he washed me, before I did the same with him. He told me he could wash his own hair since he was taller, but I made him bend down because I wanted to fucking do it. And I think the more permanent, larger smile that stayed on his lips after that request told me he liked that I had insisted.

The shower wasn’t very long either since we had slept in until nine in the morning, and I still wanted that walk with him before we left.

We did, however, run into Molly and Helen downstairs, who looked like fucking zombies.

Molly was nursing a cup of coffee, and Helen was trying to make us all toast.

Heavy on the trying part because I noticed a pile of toast she had already discarded, which was burnt far beyond salvage. The cabin didn’t have a toaster, so she was forced to use a stove. And it was… going. Not great, but going.

They both mustered up the best hello they could manage before going back into their hungover state, and because these two foolish girls brought way too much booze and not nearly enough ibeprophen, I decided to run upstairs and bring them down the Advil I had bought just in case, handing them the whole bottle since that was the first thing Dylan and I took before Dylan reupped in his allergy meds, and they were going to need it way more than we had.

After that, my boyfriend and I were off, just telling these two to eat some of the Carmel sheet cake instead if the toast was a bust.

I didn’t want to come back to a burning cabin on our last day here.

“I’m pissed I slept through the sunrise,” Dylan muttered with his hand firmly in mine, leading the way up a well-made trail. We didn’t dare wander off the beaten path this morning after getting lost Friday night, which honestly brought us both peace of mind.

“ We slept through the sunrise,“ I reminded him.

“Well, like, I had this whole cute morning stroll planned for us… but… but after last night…” Dylan’s voice trailed off a bit sheepishly for a moment there. “I didn’t want to leave that bed right away. Which is selfish as shit, I know.”

My right hand placed in his left, gave it a gentle squeeze. “I- I didn’t want to either,” I told him, before taking a step or two to catch right up to his side, then I brought the back of his hand up to my lips for a kiss.

We hadn’t gone into detail about last night, besides when Dylan was washing my back in the shower. He had bent down to whisper near my left ear, “I want last night to be every night with you. A-And this morning to be every morning. Minus the hangover.”

And it had caught me so off guard that at first I just nodded, before whispering above the shower water, “I-I-I want that. I r-really fucking want that.”

And, well, now we were here.

“Isiah?” Dylan asked, turning to me.

“Hmm?” I replied, looking back up at him.

“I’ve… I’ve never loved anyone or anything more than I love you. You didn’t ask for reassurance that I liked what we did yesterday, and I… like, I really liked that. That you don’t doubt that I only ever had and only ever will want this between us. With you.”

I felt my stomach remind me just how fucking strongly I felt for this man. My whole fucking body did as I got closer to his side. “I… I’m sorry I get so in my head about this. You’ve never hid anything from me. You’ve always been honest when things weren’t right with us, and I just-” I cut my words off, just trying to process his words and my own at this point.

He’d always been what I wanted.

“I just- I realized that it was wrong. A voice inside my head kept telling me that maybe, like… like you were just doing all this for me… but that’s a really shitty light to paint you in… because you’ve spent almost the whole decade caring about how I felt. You would’ve tried to make things work as friends if you didn’t want this and I-… I get that now.” I whispered that last part even lower, to which Dylan gave me the most honest, beautiful smile in return.

“If things get like that again, Isiah… I want you to talk to me. Even if you don’t ask for reassurance, I’ll always give it to you in the way I’ve been taught. By my actions .”

And the grip I had on Dylan’s hand only tightened, following as he took a few slow, deliberate steps off the well-crafted path to turn and rest his back against a tree closest to our right, pulling me into him.

The air was chilly as we approached more of the autumn season, but our light jackets, coupled with his warmth, made that slight chill nonexistent.

“When I think of what we do next- of where we’ll go after graduation… I just want you here with me,” he whispered, gently letting go of my hand to wrap them slowly around my waist as I looked up at him. “And it’s a scary thought,” his admission was gentle. “Statistically speaking, they never recommend following a partner off to college…”

Dylan was voicing some fears of my own now, whether I had fully admitted them to myself or not. I couldn’t help but have my fears get the better of me when I thought of every opportunity Dylan would have after graduation.

He didn’t like to talk about it much… but because of who his father was, the world was truly his fucking oyster. He could go anywhere easily, and even if I wanted nothing more than to be with him, I… I didn’t want to hold him back from that.

“But then each day I’m with you, I realize that we do ourselves- the last eight years we’ve been together- one massive deservice to think we’ve ever fallen into that: being a statistic.”

My eyes were starting to gloss over a bit as I thought of what he was saying… but it was much easier to blame it on the cold.

The cold I had long since forgotten about. What I couldn’t even feel anymore thanks to how close he held me.

“Every year, without fail,  you and I have landed ourselves in the same classes. Achieved the same accolades. Aced the same tests. Obliterated the competition. We’re just fine working on our own, but together? Together we’re a fucking unit . We’ve always pushed each other to be better, making our only competition us and a perfect score… So let’s not do that now, yeah?” He offered quietly. “Let’s not box ourselves in like that, thinking what we have is like anyone else.”

My hands had rested themselves comfortably on Dylan’s forearms, but I gently shifted them upwards.

He was right.

“Because I meant what I said on that first phone call we had when I got back last month,” he murmured gently down to me now, making certain my eyes were on nothing else but his light ones. “Any room you find yourself in… I’d be honored to be in that same room… but I’d kill to be by your side, if I could.”

Damn this fucking cold , my stinging eyes whispered, lying. The erratic beating of my heart wasn’t taking as much pity on the knowing truth like the tears threatening to fall were.

“We don’t half-ass anything,” he reminded me once more. “So… why the complete fuck would we ever half-ass this after graduation. Us? “

And all I could do was nod, smiling as he bent down to gently bring those lips of his to mine.

••

57. Whittaker-Jones-Holland-Jacobs Sit-Down

Upload 3/8 today!

xoxo

Dylan

We got the call from Helen not long into my walk with Isiah, that we had to get back, eat, and pack up before the cleaners got there.

And while I probably should’ve felt complete and utter shame at the state Isiah and I might’ve left our bed in if he hadn’t made time to at least strip some of the sheets… I really didn’t.

Between last night and this morning, all I felt happy . Like serious, pure, damn near blinding happiness.

It was the things we didn’t say the prior night, and the things we did the morning after, that made me feel the closest I had ever felt to this beautiful fucking person sitting in the passenger seat of my car as we drove back, his hand holding mine firmly in his lap while we listened to something from his playlists.

Isiah had always trusted that I would never physically hurt him intentionally… but last night, he proved to me that he knew I would never emotionally hurt him intentionally, either. I wouldn’t do anything I felt was wrong, just to please him… because that was never our relationship, even before we started dating.

We were open and honest with each other. If we tried something and didn’t like it, we told each other, building that trust on the fact that we would at least try it once.

Like a dash of peppermint in my hot chocolate, and pumpkin spice in his.

We were close, yes, but we were still individuals. And it was the respect between us that perhaps a year of wrecked nerves while we were apart might’ve been why he momentarily forgot.

Last night was what made me realize that he got it now. He remembered what made us work, and what always would, even if this was new.

And this morning- being able to still reassure him of whatever came after high school- that shit felt needed. Isiah and I had the same grades on our tests, but he was the one with a shot at valedictorian because of all of his involvement, from after-school academics to club funding events, the workshops he never shied from organizing, all the way down to the extra credit he always did for each class if it was offered.

That, and pretty much the whole school loved him.

Even now. Even after the year he spent being standoffish and cold. These last few weeks, I got to see firsthand how welcoming people were as he learned to open up his kindness to them again. He mistakenly thought that the year he had changed for might have changed people’s opinions on him, but it didn’t.

Much like me, everyone knew who Isiah was. How kind he was.

And frankly, I didn’t care nearly enough as he did to help everyone the way he did. Sue me, but I was still my father’s son. A Whittaker, even though I went by Holland. And my dad reminded me of just that when I called him in the early hours of the morning. We prioritized what was ours, and only those closest to what was ours. That was the extent of our reach.

And Isiah had always known that about me. Known also about my rather blunt and crass nature. He didn’t try to force me to be anything else, or anything different.

It was my dad, that conversation he and I had about Isiah being close with Ryker, that had me feeling real shame, because dictating who Isiah could and couldn’t see was me trying to change him. I thought our year apart had changed him, but he had still stayed true to his nature if he really was there as support for Ryker.

Then this weekend just showed me further that we knew the most about each other. The only parts of Isiah I couldn’t see before were the parts he kept hidden- the things he didn’t tell me because of his feelings for me. Like his favourite accent was Irish, or he preferred to do the cooking in the relationship instead of the shopping because he trusted me to pick out the ripest ingredients, and trusted me to guide him as his Head Chef, like I always had.

In hindsight, I left the cabin loving my little troublemaker of a gal Molly even more because that game she had us playing had brought Isiah and me closer…

Something I didn’t think was possible before.

I was driving Isiah and I towards the Halloween store, honestly booking it since it was Sunday and the store was only open until 3 PM. We had left the cabin at around noon, with a decent hour and a half of a drive ahead of us still.

When we were only about one hour out, however, my dad gave me a ring. Isiah was quick to ask if I should switch the Bluetooth out for my phone since we were using his for the GPS and music, allowing me to take the call over the car’s speaker, but I just shook my head no.

I was transparent with Isiah on everything… yet the slightly sensitive nature of my dad’s tone when I had called him during the night after my nightmare made me want to keep whatever he was calling about, private for now.

“Hey, Pops,” I answered, having let go of Isiah’s hand so I could hold the phone to my ear and keep the other hand on the steering. “You get my text? We’re heading back now, making our way to the Halloween store.”

“Hey, kiddo. I actually want you to head straight home,” my dad replied, making me instantly groan.

“Daddddd,” I whined, “you promised that Isiah and I could-”

“I know,” my dad sighed. I’ll let you guys go after school on Tuesday. I already cleared it with Isiah’s mum. And you can bring him here first, I just want to have a sit-down with you both today, then I’ll drive him home after.“

… I took the longest fucking pause at his words…

And what I immediately started racking over was what I might’ve done wrong that he found out about.

Did he somehow know we all got wasted yesterday? Had Molly accidentally drunk called him or something?

Nah , I shook my head at that. Her phone was full on dead for most of the day, and my dad would’ve called me immediately after, even if she had.

I mean… then there was the fact that he was still letting me and Isiah go shopping for costumes on Tuesday, so it didn’t feel like I was getting grounded again, but I was still on high alert.

“What’s… what’s going on?” I asked a bit lower, feeling Isiah’s eyes on me now. He was starting to fidget with his hands into the sleeves of one of my hoodies he was wearing, probably running through the same exact thoughts I was.

“You’re not in trouble, kid,” my dad assured me with a light chuckle. “Just come home. We’ll talk when you guys get here.”

“Alright. See you soon, love you,” I rushed out, simply throwing that love you in there as extra precaution, even though my dad was assuring me that I wasn’t in trouble. And he didn’t sound stressed or anything; honestly, he sounded the most relaxed I think I had heard him sound in a long time.

Which I didn’t know how to feel about as he said a “love you” back, and I ended the call.

“Everything okay?” Isiah asked nervously, glancing over my way again.

“I have no idea,” I replied, turning to him with those honest words. “He said you should come over, too. He wants to have a sit-down with both of us.” That just put my boyfriend and me even more on edge.

“Like… to talk about us?” Isiah offered. “Like you and me?”

I simply offered up a shrug, because I had no fucking idea.

It felt like what a parent would say to the kid and who they’re dating when they want to talk about certain… expectations and shit.

But I was positive my dad already knew Isiah and I had probably taken things further already.

And I was certainly positive he would rather handle Derek’s taxes than give me the talk.

Both Isiah and I made it home around two in the afternoon. That haste we were once making for the Halloween store turned into a scenic drive real quick as anticipation for whatever the fuck my dad was going to drop on us settled in.

I didn’t like to see my old man stressed, ever, but this felt… different. Like, he was too calm, ya know?

Since my dad was driving Isiah home later, for reasons I didn’t even know about but put me even more on edge, I ended up having him keep his bags in the car. I also made absolutely certain that there wasn’t even a single crumb left anywhere in this vehicle before we exited and made our way up to the penthouse floor.

Isiah and I practically walked in silence, with him muttering out a “I’m nervous as fucking hell right now,” to me.

I responded with a quiet, “ ditto ,“ because I was nervous as shit too.

We both hesitated at the front door, took the deepest of breaths in, then I used the fob key to let us in. “Hey, Pops, I’m home!” I declared about as confidentially as I could.

Then I saw that my dads were already sitting at the dining table, which just fucked up my nerves even more. My dad was on one end, facing the door, while Carson was on the other with his back slightly to us. I noticed that each of them had some paperwork face down on the glass table.

But then I also noticed something even stranger. There were two empty champagne flutes placed in front of them, and two additional chutes placed at the two spots to the right of my dad.

“Hey kiddo, hey Isiah. Set your bags down, then come sit with us,” my dad replied, gesturing us over.

I mean… both of them at least looked well-rested in some comfy house clothes, so I was praying that was a good sign. Regardless, I glanced over at Isiah while I set my duffel and backpack down and closed the front door, then we kicked off our shoes before making our way towards them.

“Stop looking like I’m about to read you both your damn Miranda rights,” my dad snapped, making Isiah and me chuckle nervously while settling into the dining seats next to each other. My dad was on my left end, while Carson was on Isiah’s right end.

“First off, how was the trip?” Carson jumped in with a smile, easing the raw tension a bit.

“Really good,” I replied with, and Isiah nodded, agreeing. “How, um… how was New Jersey? You said hi to Antoine for me, right?”

My dad and Carson both nodded. “Yep,” Carson added. “He misses you and Isiah, so we’ll have to take a family trip out there. I’ll chat with your mum and dad about it, Isiah.”

Isiah nodded, smiling. “Thanks, Carson, I’d love that.”

“Now,” my dad cut in, making me and my boyfriend jump a bit. “We have a few things to discuss this afternoon.”

Once again, he was calm. Too fucking calm.

“Carson, will you do the honors?” My dad gestured towards the kitchen, and Carson got up immediately, making his way past us and the dining area towards the kitchen before he grabbed something in a paper bag that was sitting on the counter. “A few things happened this weekend that I thought would be fitting to discuss today since we’re all back in town,” Pops then explained.

This just made Isiah and me glance at each other nervously, but I reached under this glass table and placed a hand on Isiah’s left thigh, trying to reassure him and probably myself that everything was fine.

“There really is no right way to put this,” we all glanced over at Carson, who was starting to remove something from the brown paper bag while he walked over to my dad. And soon enough, a champagne bottle appeared in his hand.

My boyfriend and I just glanced at each other again.

“Dylan,” my father spoke, having me shift my gaze from Carson who was now standing beside him, to my father himself. “My father finally died this weekend.”

…

Isiah and my eyes grew wide as fuck as we sat in utter complete silence.

And that silence was only broken by the loud pop the champagne made once Carson opened it, being careful not to spill anything on my dad’s plush, white carpet in the process.

I…

I truly had no fucking words to even say to that… I mean, all I could do was watch as Carson took my dad’s champagne flute first to pour some of the bubbly liquid into it, before he slowly made his way around the table, doing the same for the rest of the glasses.

My father’s sharp eyes were watching me closely, however, reading my rather stunned expression, and eventually I had to force myself to say something.

“He’s…” I started. “He’s… dead?”

That was about the best I could get out.

“Yes,” my dad nodded, still in that relaxed state.

Either I truly had one insane man as my creator, or the guy took an Ambien this morning or something. Either way, there was no possible way in hell he was looking this… calm?

I mean, if anything, I thought maybe he’d look excited… but he just looked, like, content somehow?

“Yes. So to celebrate my first year on not losing money to the pool we had going for bets placed on his death, I decided to express my token of appreciation with a bottle of Armand De Brignac Ace Of Spade Champagne.”

As Carson poured, Isiah and I unintentionally grimaced from the look of alcohol, which made my father’s eyes spark with mild curiosity. To be frank, I didn’t want to see liquor until like my fiftieth birthday or some shit, and I was sure that Isiah felt the same after our weekend of drinking…

But we sure as shit couldn’t tell our father that.

And so, reluctantly, Isiah and I had to reach for that glass as we both cracked my dad a smile, and took a painful sip.

“How’d he die?” I asked. The look Isiah gave me told me that that was probably a pretty blunt question to ask, but that was just my relationship with my father. And the slight smirk my old man gave me told me not to worry about it.

“Heart attack,” my dad replied, which had me immediately suspicious, but Isiah nodded, fully believing that. “Anyways, regardless, Dylan- you, me, and Carson will be spending the day tomorrow as a family. I already put in an absence request with your school. I think family time will do us all some good, so I’ll drop off whatever work is due for you tomorrow in the morning.”

My eyes just grew larger at that.

Missing a whole school day for my grandfather’s death seemed a little… odd … but I let it fly because if my dad was starting this conversation out with his old man kicking the bucket, I had to brace myself for whatever else was coming.

So I nodded. “Sounds good, Pops.”

“Perfect,” he replied. “Next thing… let’s talk Texas.”

That perked Isiah and I right on up. Were we really on an upward trajectory with this conversation? I couldn’t help but wonder.

“Carson and I discussed our next trip down for Thanksgiving. First, Isiah, we would love to have you down there with us-”

“No fucking way!” I exclaimed, grinning like an absolute madman at my father before he could even finish that sentence. “Are you serious, Dad?! Please- pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseeee tell me you’re fucking serious. “

“Yes,” my dad deadpanned, “now settle the fuck down, Dylan. Just because Carson and I said it’s alright doesn’t mean Isiah’s parents have agreed. I plan on asking Sheila when I drop Isiah home tonight.”

My head damn near rolled off my neck from how hard it snapped to Isiah, and he was grinning just as wide… until that smile of his faltered a bit. “Wait… I don’t know if my mum… if she would be cool with letting me-”

“I have two proposals to offer her because I don’t plan on just taking you away for the holiday,” my old man cut in, silencing Isiah. “First option: I convince your parents to take time off and join us. The ranch house now has five available bedrooms, not including Jimmy’s den, where he sleeps. Kenneth would take the first room, Louise and Sara would take the second, Carson and I would-”

“ I love that we can now, baby, “ Carson cut in, earning him a seriously sharp glare from my father before he told him to shut the hell up .

“Carson and I will take the third,” my father then continued, “And your parents will take the fourth if they’d like.”

I was following my old man’s words closely… resulting in my eyes practically popping out of my fucking sockets as I all but blurted out, “Isiah and I can share a room?! L-Like- like- like G Gramps will allow that?!”

“ Once I’m through with him, I suspect he will, yes, “ my dad replied a bit more lowly, and far more to himself.

That made Isiah and me both excited… and extremely fucking confused. Carson’s grandfather was my father’s literal favourite person. I couldn’t imagine they were beefing or something right now.

“The fact that this blackmail existed all along and you and I had to endure our first trip down together in separate rooms is complete and utter bullshit,” Carson muttered, which only made me even more confused.

“What did G Gramps do?” I asked with the abbreviation that was easier than calling Carson’s grandfather my great-grandfather.

“Not important,” my old man replied. “And anyways, second option if the first doesn’t work: John has agreed to use his private to fly Isiah out on Thanksgiving evening. It still allows you time to eat with your family, Isiah, then I’d send a company car for you since we’ll already be down in Texas and your mum would be working that night regardless if she can’t get it off, to get Christmas off.”

Genuinely, and I mean genuinely , I thought I was going to have a fucking heart attack as my eyes snapped back and forth between my dad and Isiah.

Isiah looked about as fucking surprised as I did.

“Are you fucking-”

“ Language , Dylan, good fuck,“ my father scolded, and I fixed my dialogue real fucking quick.

“-freaking joking?!”

Both my dads shook their heads no. “John had some plans or whatever with Derek, but I told him to sit his ass down somewhere this year,” Pops explained. “Or fly commercial, I don’t give a shit.”

Carson chuckled, smiling all too contentedly at that. I swear the guy relished every inconvenience his employer experienced, brought on by my father. I had no idea how this man still had a job some days. Then I remembered who he married.

“Shit- shoot,” Isiah interjected, but made sure to fix his swearing so fast. “Th-thank you- I-I mean-”

“You alright with a late flight?” My dad asked, glancing past me to ask Isiah. “It’ll be private, so you’ll get down there in just a few hours, but I want to give you as much time with your family as I can before you head down. I’ll do my best to balance the time because you’ll need all the sleep you can get that night… which leads me to my next thing.”

And this point, if my dad hit me with any more things, I’d probably pass out from the insane dopamine hit I was currently experiencing. Literally the only brain cell I had that was still functioning was making sure I didn’t grip Isiah’s thigh too tight from how excited I was.

“Isiah… you’ll need to be in bed early because we’ll be heading to the Halletsville tourney that Friday morning… where, upon my father dying, has given me a change of heart.” Then my dad turned to me. “Dylan, if you finish strong on your quarter finals early November… I’ll let you compete this year.”

…

…

I think my soul just about ascended my fucking body as I simply stared at my father, a wave of everything- every fucking emotion hitting me in the face with a steel chair as I processed what he had just said.

I didn’t even know what to fucking say to that. To him.

My feet shot me up from this chair abruptly, but my dad quickly ordered, “Sit back down, Dylan. You can come tackle me with that linebacker build of yours after I’m done. I won’t survive more than one tonight.”

And that had me sitting back in my seat lightning fucking fast, just… just fucking speechless.

“Carson will walk you through registration-”

“-He’s walked me through it every year for this exact moment,” I blurted out.

“ Dylannn ,“ Carson whined at the sudden confession, and that confession earned him another glare from my father, which I knew  probably fucked up Carson’s chances at any intimacy tonight with my old man.

“ Of course he fucking has ,“ my dad hissed at him, forcing me to give Carson one sheepish apology as I avoided his pointed look my way. “Regardless, you’ll get Lightning ready with Carson,” my dad continued. “Some old man recently told me that it was alright to trust the Jones when it came to competing… which leads me into my final piece for tonight.”

At this point, nothing- and I mean nothing- could’ve topped this. Absolutely fucking nothing . Not a damn thing-

“These,” my dad reached for and slid the one face-down piece of paper across the table to me, and Carson did the same with his to Isiah, “are graduation gifts from that very same old man. A tribute of appreciation and recognition for how hard you and Isiah have worked. And I promise you, these are earned. That old man wouldn’t put his reputation on the line like this if they weren’t.”

My dad and Carson kept a hand over the papers, however, not letting Isiah and I flip them just yet.

“Mr. Bellington sent them over this weekend with one request from you, Dylan…”

I glanced up from the paper to my father now, absolutely shell-shocked at the fact that 1. Mr. Bellington, of all people, had been the one to convince my dad to let me compete, and 2. He had given not just me but also Isiah a graduation gift, let alone a gift when we were only just starting month two of our senior year.

Isiah and I weren’t even halfway through yet. There was still some distance between us and graduation.

“W-What… what is it?” I asked my dad.

“He would like you to allow him to fill the shoes of what should’ve been my old man. The shoes that shithead wasn’t worthy to fill as your biological grandfather.”

I started choking on my own spit immediately.

“But it’s your choice, kiddo,” my dad added. “It’s just a request he made, and this gift still stands even if you say no.” He and Carson finally removed their large hands for Isiah and I to quickly flip our pieces of paper over.

And as we took the about .0087265 of a fucking nanosecond to read the first few sentences of a letter that was typed out, seemingly addressed to me and Isiah individually, both Isiah and I sprang from our seats, damn near screaming out, “ shut the fuck up!! “

Then we whipped our heads back at each other.

Then back down at the letters gripped tight in each of our hands.

Then at each other again.

Then at both my dads, just snapping our heads right, then left, then right again.

“Bellington has already secured you two advanced placements if you two accept it. The letter is a courtesy for you to submit to their administration with your final records for senior year.”

Shit, we almost knocked the damn champagne chutes over on the table as Isiah waved the letter Carson’s way, and I did the same with mine to my father.

“You’rejokingyou’rejokingyou’rejoking- you’re fucking joking!!” I couldn’t help but exclaim in the rawest form of excitement at my dad. This was better than any gift I had ever been given, besides the old Atari and retro TV my old man gifted me eons ago.

“H-H-How- h-h-how?!” Isiah asked Carson. Carson just gestured to my dad, with both of them smiling now, clearly enjoying the justifiable expression of emotion Isiah and I had for something this major.

“Bellington said you two would understand it more than I would. I don’t know the first thing about that section of astrophysics,” my dad admitted.

“And I don’t even know what astrophysics is,” Carson added, making my dad try to muffle a genuine chuckle as he looked across the table at Carson. I could tell my old man was still trying to still be pissed at him about the whole Texas thing I had blurted out, but there was genuine happiness there, and it only grew when he looked back up at Isiah and I who had pretty much almost tackled each other by how hard we hugged each other, damn near jumping up and down like kids.

That smile faltered, however, as soon as my dad realized who was next on the receiving end of our excitement. And we almost took the old man out of his chair by how hard we charged at him.

I mean, he literally almost flew out the seat. I had to reach for the backrest of it before all three of us went down as a unit.

“ Get the hell off me ,“ my dad ordered with that massive smile of his only growing.

And yes, Carson was in fact next.

And also yes, he handled our force much, much better than my dad did. He at least stood up before we charged him.

“I should take you all to court for elderly abuse,” my dad snapped, but there wasn’t nearly as much edge to his words as there should’ve been, especially not when he full-on laughed, watching Carson pick both me and Isiah up with each of his arms like he used to when we were younger.

“Y-You- You have to call!” I told my father once my feet touched the ground again. “You have to thank that good man! And tell him I’ll call him whatever the hell he wants me to! Grandpa! Santa! The second fucking coming of Christ! “

“Slow your roll there, cap’n,” my dad chuckled. “Good is a stretch.”

I couldn’t help but look back down at the now slightly crinkled paper in my hands, just staring at who the letter was addressed to.

It was a recommendation letter for Isiah and I… 

A courtesy of two placements into New York City’s most prestige one year program in Astroparticle Physics - a program that involved access to travel for all students who attended, allowing access to underground laboratories in China, Canada, Japan, and fucking Italy .

It also had a waitlist the length of the fucking Nile to even attempt to get into.

And if my dad was handing this to us… if he was giving us the okay to decide on whether we would take the offer…

Then he and Mr. Bellingt- he and my fucking grandfather , fuck it , had just given my goddamn boyfriend and me the literal gap year of the fucking century.

••

58. Halloween Night

Upload 4/8 today!

Enjoy, lovelies!

xoxo

Isiah

Saturday, October 31st, Halloween Night: 12:30 AM

They say life comes at you fast.

That the giant tsunami of it all, incoming from the wild currents of the ocean, was something you could either ride or get washed under, pulling you to the bottom by its unforgiving nature.

And for the weeks leading up to tonight, I could’ve sworn I had finally caught the rip in the currents with the edge of my board, riding that glorious high of things finally falling into place…

That was until I now found myself riding with Dylan back to his place from Molly’s, holding a frozen bag of peas to my swelling face as Dylan drove us.

We were sitting in utter complete silence, neither one of us daring to speak on what the fuck just happened.

This had to be what it felt like when the wave whipped out from under you, forcing your body down under against your will…

Thursday, October 15th: 6:15 PM - 16 days before Halloween Night

“I still cannot fucking believe it!” Dylan explained excitedly over the phone. And I was matching his energy in full now, because I had been pacing my room in my own excitement for about the last forty minutes of this call.

After almost two weeks of deliberation from my parents, which really meant two whole weeks of Dylan and I groveling at their feet, begging them with all we had left in us to say yes to Texas and the one-year program before university… they had finally given us an answer.

And it was yes to both.

I literally cried like a fucking baby in my father’s arms, especially because this answer came yesterday, approximately 10 minutes after my mother had gotten home, and twenty minutes after I had finally admitted to my dad that I was gay.

And it went about as chaotic as this:

“D-Dad?” I had called to him from his spot on the floor near the living room couch, tinkering around with something my mother had surely told him to put together. It looked like some sort of bookshelf.

“What’s up, champ?” My dad asked, looking up at me with a comforting smile. “If you’re here to beg me to say yes, can you come back in, say, two hours? I can pencil you in then, but right now your mum is almost home, and she will actually kill me if she knows I forgot to put this shit together this morning.”

It was now around five in the evening, and my mum was set to get back around half past five… so my dad was building whatever this was, like his life depended on it, for it very well may have.

“I… um… I… I, well-”

“I love you, son,” my dad interjected quickly, “but if you don’t accept my reschedule proposal, then I need you to get whatever request has you nervous out in a timely manner. Once again, I’m saying this out of love, and don’t let these blunt words be my last words to you before your mother puts a bullet in my head.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle a bit nervously at that.

“R-Right,” I nodded to myself, pausing a moment to make sure I had my words right before just blurting them.

It was so stupid that I was even this nervous to begin with, considering any way my dad found out would be light years better than how my mum had.

Now that was a fucking train wreck.

And I knew my dad loved Dylan’s parents. I knew he wasn’t homophobic or anything like that, but still… as crazy as it sounded, I wished I had just told him the night my mum found out. That would’ve been so much easier than building up these nerves for weeks after.

My dad glanced up at me during this silence between us, his eyebrows furrowing slightly. “Everything alright, Is?” He asked… and I kinda nodded, but there wasn’t much sureness to it. “Scratch everything I just said,” my dad answered quickly, patting a spot on the carpeted floor next to him while he pushed some pieces of wood away to make more space for me.

I found myself walking towards him and slowly lowering down to sit next to him so both our backs were flush against the edge of the couch, us shoulder to shoulder. “I’ll handle certain death by the hands of your mother later. What’s up? What’s going on?”

His body shifted towards me so he could lightly bump my shoulder with his.

“I…” I started again. “I… I just, um… I w-wanted to, like… to talk to you, like… like about, um… like about Dylan and I-”

“That you two are dating?” My dad offered all matter-of-factly, making my eyes slowly grow. “Oh, come on, Is, you think I didn’t know? You’ve been living in the guy’s sweatshirts for like a month now, with him dropping you off pretty much every day after school, to you also coming home with hickeys all over your neck-”

Jesus, fuck, my hand quickly reached for the collar of my hoodie… well… Dylan’s hoodie, to try and pop it up a bit, hiding my neck a little more.

Averin High had had a two-hour late start on Monday, and let’s just say that, well, Dylan and I didn’t really disclose that tidbit of information to our parents. Instead, we most definitely capitalized on it in the parking lot of a park nearby after he picked me up in the morning.

Something my parents did not need to know about.

“Is-… Isiah,” he put more gently now, making sure I was listening closely by using my full name. “I know. And I know your mother knows, but she’s been keeping her mouth shut whenever I asked her… which is how I know she knows. Actually, if you can find anyone in this damn city who doesn’t know, you might shock me to death.”

… Well , I couldn’t help but think to myself. This definitely wasn’t how I thought this was going to go.

“And it’s fine, Is,” my dad turned his head more to me. “Dylan’s a great kid. His parents are good people, and if he’s the reason you’ve been hauling ass to make up for your junior year of mischief and mayhem, the kid could move in tomorrow and call me his father-in-law for all I give a damn.”

That part made me smile.

Massively .

“Y-You should know that I’m, um… that I’m kinda-… like… gay,” I told him gently. His bluntness was reassuring to say the least. And apparently, he wasn’t done yet.

“Yeah, no shit, Sherlock,” he chuckled warmly. “Eighteen years and no girl mentioned. Ever. Not rocket science, Is. Especially with those stellar genes you got from me.”

I gave my father a once-over, purposefully holding my gaze at his beer belly and his balding spot and questioning whether this was my future, to which he gave my shoulder a light shove with his.

“It happens to the best of us,” he grumbled with a slight smile, justifying his aging. “All I’m saying is: you’re eighteen. You’re intelligent. You’ve got a heart of a Jacobs- pure fucking gold . And Dylan makes you insanely happy so that’s good enough for me cause you have no fucking idea how many times I got on my hand and knees, coming before the lord to simply pray that it wasn’t Ryker… no offense to Ryker, of course.”

I just… well, I slowly nodded.

Ryker and I were still friends, but it was easy to see that between him and Dylan, only one of them actually had a good track record of getting me home at a reasonable time. Or encouraging a good attendance record.

“Thanks, Dad… I think,” I told him with a smile, and he chuckled, nodding.

“Now,” he then said as he reached for the wood slabs again. “If this is all you had to get off your chest, I suggest you leave me here to put this shit together before your mum comes, and you try cleaning up your room. I half suspect your mum has been delaying our decision on Texas and that super sciency program until you were finally honest to me about this. Why don’t we make it even easier for her to say yes?”

And my old man didn’t have to tell me twice as I rushed him for a quick, tight hug, then sprang to my feet.

And he was right.

Once my mum got home, both my parents called me out into the living room to give me their final verdict, which was a yes.

We’d all go down for Thanksgiving so they could also cheer on Dylan for his very first Tournament the following day, and once next fall came around, Dylan and I would be fully in the Astroparticles Program with shared boarding, eventually traveling the world together for a year doing super sciency shit, as my father put it.

“I’m still on cloud fucking nine,” I told Dylan over the phone. “Like… like I still can’t fucking believe that we’re doing this. Like we’re taking a gap year. I mean, leave it to us to take a gap year in the nerdiest way possible, but still, Dylan, we’re taking a fucking gap year! “

“ I know! “ Dylan laughed, his laugh absolutely contagious over the phone. “And I know it’s a bit extreme but… you should know that I’m not touching a drop of alcohol at Molly’s party in two weeks-”

“Oh, me fucking neither,” I rushed out. “I’d be damned if I do anything to fuck this up for us.”

“Ditto,” Dylan replied wicked fast. “Fuck, I’m so excited for you to be in Texas with me for a whole fucking week!”

Fuck… just-… fuck! “I am too!” I replied as more warmth spread through me.

“Oh, and since my parents will be out of town for my dad’s birthday in January- don’t mention it to my dad since he doesn’t know yet, but Carson is taking him to Alaska… I think I should spend that weekend at yours, or you can come to mine,” Dylan offered, just making me a goofy mess as I continued pacing. “Oh, oh, and my grandfather wants to meet us both, Mr. Bellington, so we’ll have to figure out New Years together. I want a New Year’s kiss too. Non-negotiable.”

“I-I could pencil that in,” I chuckled over the line. “But just… just to clarify… we, uh… We’ll still be, like, spending the night at Molly’s… like, together, right? During, um… Halloween?”

“Y-Yes,” Dylan confirm quick. “Yeah- yes.”

I let out the quietest sigh of relief that I could. Molly and I had been spending far, far too much time together in secret over the phone, making damn sure I had that alone time in her nightmare-fueled bedroom, whether Dylan and I were drinking or not.

It would be the first night we had alone time and a bed, since the cabin trip, and I was ready to commit acts of crime for that alone time.

“C-Cool,” I tried to play it off, but I was already glancing down at my duffel bag, thinking of the contents I had bought to make sure that night was perfect.

Saturday, October 31st, Halloween Night: 3:50 PM

“You two are late as all hell,” Molly barked our way, and yet she had thrown that door open with a knowing smile.

Dylan immediately frowned at her, pointed to her chest, and openly noted, “So you were serious about the no on the pointy boobs, huh.”

I would’ve face-palmed if I weren’t already used to years of this from Dylan. Molly just rolled her eyes at my handsome boyfriend, who was, by the way, wearing tights. He was also wearing shorts that, while I wished were shorter so I could see more of those defined legs, I had to take what I could get because he and I had ended up having to buy most of our outfits online after seeing the selection in stores a few weeks ago.

I was just grateful everything came in time, honestly.

And those tights he was wearing, including the tights I was wearing under shorts since I went authentic with my Beast Boy costume, were the reason he and I were both late to begin with. This horny giant barely let me out the front door when he came to pick me up at 2:45 PM, before I was being ushered into the backseat of his car parked on my street. He was incredibly lucky that my parents weren’t home after what I had promised them about us explicitly not doing this in public.

Anyways, fast forward like an hour later and we were finally here.

“Mention my boobs again, Dylan, and I’ll put you on jello-shot taste-testing duty.” Molly threatened my boyfriend, and ya know what? It was a good threat.

Her Jell-O shots could barely even solidify because of the alcohol content in them.

And so, alas, my boyfriend held some of those intrusive thoughts back, clearly still riding the high of what we had done in the back seats before our drive here, and he and I allowed Molly to put us to work immediately.

Her home was actually a pretty chic Brooklyn-style home, which was great because it meant there weren’t any neighbors on the other side of the walls, ready to ruin the fun.

I still predicted that Molly was one hundred percent going to get grounded for this… but I just let the young gal live a little. Judging by even the outside and the inside of the home, she had already put a lot of effort into this party, but more specifically, the props she got for it were next level.

In one room- the storage room she had cleared out- she made it a photo booth where people could snap pictures with their phone camera in a ringlight stand. The kitchen looked like a whole butcher shop, with the plastic flaps hanging from the entryway, and stickers of blood splatter stuck everywhere.

Dylan and I were tasked with hanging up the fake dead animals she bought, like a gutted open rubber pig, while she concocted the jello mixtures that had the capabilities of landing folks in the hospital.

My handsome boyfriend, at some point, had to rip the goddamn vodka bottle out of her hand after she poured 3/4 of it for a mixture of Jell-O that was only supposed to make 15 Jell-O shots a batch.

What I enjoyed most was that while yes, this entire home was quickly turning into a set for a horror movie… we were doing all this decoration to the most cheesiest Halloween playlist known to man, with Mollie starting her pregaming early with a beer, while Dylan and I kept ourselves stone cold sober, sipping some Ginger-Ale.

He and I already had quite a bit to live for before two weeks ago… but after my parents gave the okay, we had far, far too fucking much to lose if anything went wrong tonight.

Dylan had even parked his car safely down the street from Molly, so just in case we had to flee if the cops were called, we could blend in easily with the other New Yorkers who would be roaming the streets in costume to hit up other parties, and then we’d either head home to his place or head home to mine.

My parents were out celebrating with some friends tonight, and both of Dylan’s dads had really stressed that we could come home anytime if we needed to.

I think Dylan and I’s parents both knew we were about to be on our best behavior for the rest of the damn school year after everything they had said yes to and gifted to us.

Dylan also parked his car a bit away from the congested areas of the streets because he had some car problems a few weeks ago that his Dad was still reeling over the expenses of. My handsome boyfriend wasn’t willing to take any chances tonight.

While we were decorating away, I did step outside to try and give Ryker a ring around six in the evening. It was his birthday today, but I hadn’t been able to reach him all day. Usually, he was quick to respond, yet I remembered that his dad was taking him out today, so I didn’t stress the distance too much and just sent a text wishing him a happy birthday, letting him know we’d link up tomorrow for brunch- my treat.

Then I headed back inside and tried to get ready for a party that was starting around 10 PM.

The streets were already beginning to fill up with parents walking their kids for trick-or-treating, and at around 7 PM, Molly put Dylan and me on door duty to hand out candy while she continued decorating.

I thought she was almost done… until she pulled out about fifty Amazon boxes she had jammed into an unused closet to hide from her parents, and started unpacking even more shit she had bought, like two fog machines for both floors of the home that came with LED lights, more blood splatter decals, and a shit ton of spider webs.

Dylan and I had decided to sit out on the first step of Molly’s home, chatting with kids and parents while we passed out candy from the massive pumpkin bowls we were holding.

“You know,” he said, leaning against a porch post while I leant against the rail across the front steps leading out to the sidewalk, “this isn’t half bad.”

“The party hasn’t even started yet, Dylan,” I chuckled, reminding this handsome man. He gave me a grin in return… however, those eyes of his were appreciating every last bit of this Beast Boy costume I was wearing.

And my eyes were on him, too. On those tights he wore… the cape he had on with the hood partially lifted, showing me those beautiful set of eyes that Molly’s porch light illuminated.

“I still can’t believe I’m wearing tights, and you didn’t have to paint your skin,” Dylan grumbled teasingly.

“Hey, I’m wearing tights too. And both of us would’ve been green after this afternoon in your car if that was the case,” I reminded him, watching as those eyes of his darkened, and a slight knowing smile formed.

Saturday, October 31st, Halloween Night: 11:45 PM

Dylan and I had eventually retreated inside around 9:50 PM, to help more of Molly’s friends bring in the alcohol they had picked up, then she designated someone I believe she must’ve paid, to act as a quantity control bouncer, because there was a bunch of random high school and college students starting to make their way up and down this street now that the family fun was winding to a close with the kids who were out.

At least she knew the importance of making sure this didn’t get out of hand.

Inside, however, was getting packed by the minute. Dylan and I had taken a seat on one of the couches Molly pushed to the back wall of the living room to create a space for people to dance, which they comfortably did to the loud music blaring over the surround sound system. Dylan had pulled me onto his lap a bit protectively, and we had somehow found a bottle of Welch’s Sparkling juice that he and I both nursed from one red solo cup as we enjoyed our people-watching.

The whole home was only illuminated by red lights, with thick fog clinging to the floor, making the floor itself nonexistent. One guy was already passed out on the couch adjacent to us, and judging by how often people kept falling into the free space next to Dylan, only to scramble up when they noticed Dylan’s icy eyes give them a pointed glare… I both understood why he kept me on his lap and found it extremely fucking hot.

The shorts he was wearing also allowed me to feel a whole lot more as I shifted every now and again in his lap, earning me an even tighter hold from his arms wrapped around my waist.

“How are your social levels, Isiah?” He whispered near my left ear.

I turned my head, tiling it further up so I could whisper near his, “depleting. Rapidly . But being a wallflower with you makes it so much more bearable.” Then I gave his cheek a quick, cheeky kiss.

Dylan pulled me in even harder, making sure I felt just how much he liked that. He then loosened one arm wrapped around my waist so he could pull his phone out to check the time. “It’s almost midnight. I think I can hold out until like 12:15 AM, then I say we sneak upstairs.”

I nodded as soon as I heard his words. Molly had given Dylan the key to her bedroom after locking it up, making sure it was the one space we could retire to alone. I was then going to say something else… until I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket.

Dylan gently let go of me to let me check who it was, but when he spotted the caller ID right as I had, over my shoulder, his body tensed a little.

He surprised me, though, with his next choice of words. “You can step outside to take it if you need to,” he whispered near my ear, slowly releasing me. He knew it was Ryker’s birthday tonight, and I had tried getting in touch to wish him a happy birthday, so I was grateful that he understood.

That still didn’t stop him from tugging me back slightly when I started getting up, to whisper near my ear, “I’ll save your seat, baby.”

And I damn near almost face planted trying to operate my legs again as I stumbled out of the living room towards the front door.

The phone had already rung to my voicemail by the time I made it outside, so I had to pull up my call log to call Ryker back. The streets were still pretty busy, but it was much quieter out here in the crisp, chill air than it was inside the house.

Molly’s whole front yard was decorated like a graveyard, which I admittedly hate,d coupled with the dark night sky, but I had to also admit that the fresh air felt nice.

Ryker was actually the one to ring me again before I could even hit dial on his contact, and I picked up quickly.

“Happy birthday, big guy,” I chuckled as the first thing I said to him. “You’ve got a couple minutes of it left, huh?”

“Hey,” Ryker replied. “Thanks, man. You still at Molly’s?”

“For sure. And yeah, party was kinda loud inside, so I had to step out to take the call,” I explained, glancing to my left at the ghosts Molly had hung, which were swinging from the trees in her front yard. Creepy. Just fucking creepy.

“Good,” he replied. “Look straight ahead.”

My head slowly turned to the direction of the sidewalk, right past Molly’s black bar fence. And there, standing at the open gate, was Ryker himself.

He wasn’t dressed up or anything. Just wearing what he always wore. A dark hoodie, some faded jeans, and sneakers. He gave me a smile with the phone still to his ear, and a cigarette wedged between his lips as he spoke into the line again.

“Let’s stroll down the block, Izzy. Wouldn’t mind the company of a friend right now… and I’ve got a cig with your name on it.”

••

59. Penny For Your Thoughts

Upload 5/8 today!

I wasn’t joking when I said rapid fire uploads today

This chapter definitely hurt to write. I did try to keep it vague but there will be a physical assault in this book so please read at your discretion

xoxo

Isiah

“What are you doing here, man?” I asked, accepting the cigarette, while Ryker gestured for us to take a quick walk. He passed me the lighter so I could light it. “Thought you’d be busy with your dad.”

Ryker chuckled, but it was a bit drier than usual. Which said a lot, considering his chuckles were always pretty dry. Always a pleasantry, barely ever genuine.

“Let’s table that,” he told me, before taking a long drag. “Night’s beautiful tonight, huh? Perfect weather. All that jazz.”

I turned my head slightly, giving Ryker a look. We had smoked up together more times than I could count, but tonight he just seemed a bit more… off. Not like harder drugs off, but just… off.

Just… sad.

And like, not to say Ryker didn’t have anything to be down about, but he just… he never really showed it. Not like this, anyway. When his rich brown eyes caught mine, I could see something almost like physically painful in them. And so I found my steps slowing. Not to a stop or anything, but just slowing, letting the few people still out just pass him and I by.

“Is… is every cool, Ryker? What’s up, man?”

He fixed his gaze straight ahead for a moment, before both he and I took a long drag from our cigarettes. I didn’t want to push him tonight… or really any night. I knew how he got when I asked for more too soon. And, hell, today was his birthday. I didn’t want to sour it.

But still, I knew I didn’t have long. We could only make it maybe another block or two before I’d have to head back.

After we both released the smoke from that long drag, we crossed a street to make it to the next block. This side of town was a lot safer than where I lived, so most of the people roaming were just college students and parents, maybe walking back from a bar or something, and I had to admit it felt nice taking this stroll without being on edge at all times.

Ryker then turned his head to me again, giving me another warm smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. I noticed his car was parked just up the street, which was what made his next words even more uneasy.

“Can we just go for a drive somewhere? You’ve got me in like fucking Manhattan or something,” he mumbled, but I quickly shook my head, slowing to a complete stop this time.

“Ryker, I can’t leave like that,” I told him. “This was supposed to just be a phone call. Dylan’s waiting-”

Ryker scoffed quietly as he turned back to me. “Right,” he then nodded. “Dylan.”

… Shit. I lifted one hand to run it through my short curls while the other held the cigarette away from my lips.

“It’s my birthday, y’know,” he reminded me, turning around completely to face me below this dim street light. Luckily, there was barely anyone out here to see this whole scene play out.

All I could say was, “Ryker, I didn’t ask you to drive out here. And unless you tell me what’s going on, I don’t know what I can do to try and fix it. But I do want to fix it,” I replied gently. And I watched as Ryker’s eyes softened a bit before he shifted them away.

“Sit on my hood with me then, will ya? One more cigarette, then you can head back to that boyfriend of yours,” he offered, yet he was already turning away, making it towards the hood of his car. As he hopped back on it, I watched him flick his almost done cigarette out into the empty street, before he pulled his cigarette box out of his hoodie’s pocket and pulled a new one from the carton.

After he wedged that between his lips, he pulled a second one to extend out in my direction.

I let out a low sigh as I rolled the rest of the tobacco of the first cigarette on the pavement, tossing the filter end in a metal trash bin nearby, then made my way towards him. All I could do was hope he’d open up just a little on what had made him drive all the way out here in the first damn place. What had shifted his mood like this so profoundly.

My hand reached out while I made it to him, accepting the cigarette, then leaning up against the hood of his car. After he lit his second cigarette, he handed the lighter to me so I could do the same, then I handed it back.

“What’s going on, Ryker?” I asked in that same careful tone. “You just gotta let me know, man. Is it your dad? Did he do something? Did you two fight or something?” I was starting to give his slightly taller build a once-over, thinking about whether there were any injuries his thick hoodie might have been hiding.

I wasn’t going to abandon him like this. But I couldn’t just take off with him either.

Ryker released another dry chuckle, muttering under his breath, “I don’t even know where the fucker is.”

That made my eyebrows furrow a bit. “What do you mean? He bail or something today? Didn’t you two have that car expo thing?”

“We did,” Ryker replied. “He came home drunk this morning round nine. Left again before noon. Haven’t seen him since.”

“ Fucking hell, “ I whispered. “Ryker, I’m so sorr-”

“Don’t be,” his response was flat. “Should be used to it by now, yeah.”

“No. No fucking ’ yeah, ’ you fucking shouldn’t. You’ve been looking forward to this since the summer- since the fucking year began , what the complete fuck .”

But Ryker simply shrugged.

And if I were being honest… that shit broke my fucking heart. That just depleted look in his eyes. The pain wasn’t even there anymore. Those eyes of his just looked… worn. There wasn’t a glimmer of fight left in them.

I had to look away when I felt my own eyes start to gloss over because at this point, I was at a loss for words. I didn’t know how to reach him anymore. I didn’t know what I could say to fix this, or to make it any better. I didn’t want to push him… but I knew I couldn’t just stay out here all night in silence.

I didn’t know what to do.

I started to reach into the pocket that was built into the shorts I was wearing, reaching for my phone, but I heard Ryker whisper, “Don’t.”

My hand slowly stilled before I turned to him again. “I can stay out here a bit longer, Ryker, but I can’t just not tell anyone.”

“You’ll text Dylan, yeah?” He asked me.

“Yeah,” I replied, nodding quietly. “I… I have to. I don’t want to leave you-”

“But you did,” He said a bit more quietly. “We got pretty fucking close for a year, and as soon as he got back, that was it then?”

“No,” I insisted in that same quiet tone. “I wouldn’t be out here with you right now if that was just it. I wouldn’t be here caring, wondering what I can say to help this get better if that was it, Ryker.”

“You told me you didn’t give a shit about your friendship when he was away,” Ryker whispered back, shifting his gaze forward. “You told me all of that meant nothing and that you just wanted to put it behind you, that you-”

“ I kissed him, “ I whispered, blurting this out and cutting Ryker’s words off. “Before… before Dylan left for Ireland, I kissed him… and I-… and then I ran.” Ryker’s head turned, his eyes widening slowly at my revelation. “I ran, not knowing how he felt or bothering to ask. And I didn’t tell a single fucking soul that I did that shit for the whole year he was gone.”

“You… you…”

“When you and I met our junior year, I never spoke to you much about what happened because I knew I was the one that fucked up. I was the one so fucking terrified that I had just dropped an atomic bomb on seven long years of friendship at the time that I ran so fucking hard I put aside a lot of shit I had worked hard for. And that’s not on anyone else but me.”

I could feel my eyes burning harder, but I just blinked away those tears threatening to fall.

“And so-” my voice broke a bit, forcing me to take a brief pause to collect it. “So… Ryker… if you saw things differently than the way I did, I’m sorry… but I meant what I said last year when we met. I didn’t need a boyfriend… I just needed a friend.”

I swear I took about the deepest fucking inhale, just letting the barely lit cigarette fall past my lips onto the ground. I didn’t care for it anymore.

“If it’s possible for me to be someone in your life who you can call when you’re hurting, I want to be that person… but if I’ve become something to you that you know I simply can’t be… then I don’t know where that leaves us anymore.”

Ryker released a shaky breath himself, before taking another drag of his cigarette.

“I…” he whispered quietly, blowing out the smoke. “I… I thought I got to know a part of you- like the real you- in that year.”

“You did,” I replied. “But not the part you think. I’m not a guy who doesn’t care. I probably care a bit too much. All the time. You thought the real me was the guy who smoked a joint when shit felt heavy, or overwhelming… but Ryker-”

“ Izzy ,“ Ryker whispered, pleaded even. “ Please … just-“

“I’m still the kid who could only calm down during particular panic attacks when I listened to a certain kid read me comics under the covers at all hours of the morning as we braced a thunderstorm, too embarrassed to tell our parents. The only reason I’m into cars and bikes in the first place was because a certain kid had a Lightning McQueen bed frame we’d both make a fort around to play video games on his small retro TV in, and we grew up on the Tron franchise.”

I could feel my hands start to fidget in my lap, but I didn’t have a certain guy’s sweater fourteen sizes too big on me to hide that, so instead, I took another shaky breath in… then out.

“The guy you thought you knew was a guy who was willing to smoke and drink… because the one person who knew how to stabilize my nerves wasn’t here anymore… and I had thought I had single-handedly ruined that bond between him and me the night I made that decision to kiss him. The guy you thought you knew was a guy who was just running… and the pretty fucking incredible woman who birthed me recently told me that that’s not what we Jacobs do. We don’t run from our problems… so I decided to finally stop.”

I turned to Ryker again, but he had looked away, facing the empty street now.

“I don’t want to let you go- to leave you alone to this shitty fucking hand you’ve been dealt… but if it’s killing you to keep this as just friends, then-… then one of us has to pull the plug, right? Because if-… if you ask me to choose , Ryker… you’re discrediting those seven… now eight years between him and me.”

“I never was an option then, huh,” he spoke in barely a whisper at this point. The streets had died down to almost nothing, though, allowing me to hear him.

“ Not like this, “ I whispered back. “This last year, I spent so much time giving. Pouring into trying to understand and help you. But I want you to ask yourself, what did you give in return to help me understand? Some days you gave nothing, with us just sitting in silence. And you were always so willing to try and convince me to underperform when-… well… I’m… I, uh-” I took another deep breath in, like oxygen itself was something I had to plead with the air tonight to grace me with. “I fell in love with someone years ago who’d point to the highest fucking academic platform there ever was, one seemingly unachievable to anyone, and say to me, ‘race you there.’”

I found myself slowly shifting off the hood of Ryker’s car. I had overstayed. My anxiety was at an all-time high, and I just… I was realizing that there wasn’t enough oxygen out here after all.

“But if you call- if you ever need help- or rather, if you’re willing to finally let me help you, Ryker… I’ll pick up. I’ll help… but that’s all that’s within my limits for me to do. I’ve got a future I’m not willing to throw away like I didn’t spend my entire life busting my ass relentlessly to make for myself. And I hope someday you see it that way, too. That this was never handed to me either. That I had to reach out and take it.”

I took those few steps forward now, ready to make it back to someone who could settle my shaking hands, but I felt a hand reach out for my left arm, pulling me back to the hood of the car to turn to him.

I wasn’t sure what Ryker was going to say next, but he did something so unexpected I didn’t know how to fucking react for a second.

He fucking crashed his lips into mine, kissing me.

My body stilled in complete shock for maybe a second, maybe two, with nothing moving…

Until I felt something yank me back by my hair, damn near fucking throwing me over the hood of the car and onto the sidewalk on my right.

The impact alone as my body rolled against the pavement left my whole body tensing with panic and fear, unsure what the fuck was happening anymore. It felt like an almost dullness of sound in my ear, muffling the noises, but I could hear commotion coming from near Ryker’s car. Shuffling of feet against the gravel, and a lot of yelling.

My hands finally managed to push myself up, and I caught just the moment when Simon, Ryker’s dad, threw a punch that knocked the upper part of Ryker’s body against the windshield and the driver’s side mirror, breaking the side mirror off as Ryker fell down at the driver’s side.

The car itself was blocking my view, but I could see Simon’s larger build head towards him, yelling profanities of some sort as he placed his large hand on the driver’s side hood and started to kick Ryker. I couldn’t see Ryker, but I could see that rage in Simon’s eyes. His upper body moving with each kick.

I pushed myself to my feet now as Ryker cried out in pain. I was stumbling, still disoriented by what the fuck had just happened, but I forced my feet to carry forward.

“Get-” I gasped out. Fuck , that fall had knocked the wind out of me. “G-Get the fuck off-” I moved around the front end of the car, and when Simon swiveled his body around, he didn’t say anything. He just swung that fist, landing a right hook near my eye and knocking me back against the car.

That damn near sent my vision black as I felt myself crumble to the ground, but I could hear Simon now as he picked Ryker up.

“Get in the fucking car!” He yelled, dragging Ryker towards a car that was parked a bit further down the block behind Ryker’s. I tried to prop my body up into a sitting position, leaning against the driver’s side tire of the car and bending my legs in up to my chest, watching Simon force Ryker into the passenger side before he stumbled around to the driver’s, turned on his headlights, and peeled the car off onto the road fast.

“J-Jesus,” I whispered, trying to get a handle on the excruciating pain coursing through my face. Shit, that fucking piece of shit had landed a hard hit . My body had to take a whole moment to compute as it finally registered a bit of what happened. Everything felt so fast, but the first thing I did as vision at least returned to my left eye while my hand cupped my right, was search my pocket with my free hand for my phone.

Panic was overtaking me when I couldn’t find it at first, until I felt around the black pavement, feeling it right near the back of the tire. I stuttered out a shit ton of prayers as I tried unlocking it, praying the damn thing still worked. The brightness of the screen was blinding, and the screen itself was almost fully shattered, but I did manage, even through the trembling of my hands, to enter my call log and find Dylan’s number.

He was the only one I could call right now.

And he picked up on that very first fucking right.

“Isiah, where are you? What happened?”

I barely had the sight to see what the names of the streets were, but I retraced the few blocks Ryker and I had walked, thinking of which cross street was closest. “26th… and Gilbert,” I whispered. My voice sounded like I had shards of glass wedged into my throat. “Please-”

“Isiah?! Shit- shit shit shit- okay, I’m sprinting that way right now, hold on. Don’t hang up.”

Then I just heard a bunch of commotion in the background, forcing me to place the phone away from my ear a bit as I steadied my breathing more. My right hand that was still cupping my right eye, pulled away, allowing my eye to refocus, and with each breath I took, my vision got better. My heartbeat slowed.

That throw onto the pavement had thankfully only left some scrapes, but I knew that punch was going to be rough. As the initial shock wore off, however, I found myself being able to pull myself to my feet. I only took a few steps, moving towards the hood of Ryker’s car so I at least wasn’t on the street side for passing traffic, and that was when I heard Dylan.

“Isiah!” He called, fucking booking it to me. If I hadn’t just been punched in the goddamn face, I would’ve cracked a grin at his cape blowing behind him. “Isiah! What the fuck happened?”

My body was seemingly getting the hang of the whole right foot in front of the other, but as soon as Dylan reached me, his arms wrapped around me, having me gently lean back against the hood of Ryker’s car before he lifted me to set me back onto it. All I saw was the rawest form of panic on Dylan’s face, those sharp eyes of his perhaps the sharpest I had ever seen them, as they scanned every part of me, zeroing in on the eye that was probably starting to swell.

“Ryker, he-” I tried to explain.

“Ryker did this?” Dylan all but demanded, and the unrecognizable coldness in his words made me shudder, but I quickly shook my head no.

“His father,” I further explained. Dylan had started to examine my arms and legs, but there wasn’t any blood as far as I could tell, just some scrapes. “R-Ryker’s dad,” I clarified. That clarification was needed right now because Dylan looked about ready to kill someone.

I couldn’t even understand how many emotions swept through his features. And it was cutting directly through every emotion I had, forcing me to feel the raw pain of seeing him in clear panic and rage.

“I’ll call the cops,” Dylan started, but I quickly shook my head no again, placing both my hands flat, palm face down, on the hood of the car.

If the cops came right now, this was going to be even more of an ordeal. “Dylan,” I spoke more calmly while my body felt just a sheer sense of relief that he was here. “I-I’m fine. No cops.”

“Isiah, you’re not-”

“I’m. Fine,” I told him seriously. “ No cops. “

Dylan went silent for a moment, those bold eyes of his holding my own to search mine for any last shred of uncertainty, but I was sure about this. More than fucking sure. I wasn’t about to worry my mum and dad like that tonight when this was one of the few nights they had gotten to enjoy themselves. And Ryker’s dad-… he-

“Okay,” Dylan whispered more gently now. “O-Okay, no cops… I’ll… I-I’ll call my dad, okay?” He asked.

And I eventually nodded. It was probably our only option available to make sure Ryker was going to be okay tonight.

His raging, homophobic, alcoholic father had seen it. That unwarranted kiss.

••

60. The Man He Married

Upload 6/8 today!

xoxo

Don

“But whyyy , baby,” Carson whined, pulling me closer in bed. “It’s Halloweennnn .”

“Go the hell to bed,” I deadpanned, snuggling closer into his side. “I’m not putting that thing on.”

“But- but it’s so fittinggg . You take care of me all the time, just like a nurse does, and I spent a great deal of effort on selecting this one just for you.”

“It won’t fucking fit anyway, Carson,” I continued to deadpan.

“Yes, it will,” he argued.

“No, it won’t,” I replied.

“It will,” he insisted. “I memorized your exact measurements ages ago.”

“Yes. And a human body changes, Carson,” I reminded this idiot, already erasing even the thought of me in an old school nurse’s dress from my mind.

“Yes, and I have altered your sizes every time you do. Especially now that you’ve gotten even more fit.”

“ You fucking pervert ,“ I muttered, pinching the skin of his firm chest before I lay my head further on it.

“But bab-” Carson tried it. Luckily, this now fifteen-minute conversation in bed was cut short by the sound of my phone ringing on our bedside table. It was on Carson’s side since he had plucked it from my hand and set it there, his last-ditch attempt to have me climb over him to get it so he could mount me on his hips and instigate yet another round of sex, but I was ready to make peace with both my bed, my husband, and my phone on his side.

Nothing more, nothing less.

“It’s Dylan,” Carson told me a bit more seriously, before he picked up. “Hey, Dyl is ever-… w-w-wait, slow down, hold-… he-… what?!” Carson sat us both up suddenly after that. “W-Wait- wait wait, hold on, kiddo, hold on,” I watched as my husband removed the phone from his ear to quickly hand it to me, and I barely got it to my ear before Carson was already climbing out of bed, snatching up the briefs and jeans I had pulled off him hours ago.

“Dad!” Dylan called into the line. “I need- can- can you come to 26th and Gilbert? I-Isiah got punched and I just- I- I-”

“Okay,” I whispered calmly to my son as I ripped the sheets off me and pushed myself off the mattress. “Okay, Dylan, okay, it’s okay- just breathe,” I spoke gently. “Carson and I are on our way right now, just- just hang tight. Are you in a safe location?”

“26th and Gilbert?” Carson asked, verifying. I nodded, holding the phone to my ear as I found my own trousers and sweater discarded somewhere on the floor.

“Y-Yes- Yes, I think so,” my son confirmed.

“Okay, kiddo. Find a home that has a bright porch light on that street. Keep this call running, don’t hang up, alright? I’m on my way.”

“O-Okay-” I heard my son take a deep breath. “Okay,” he assured me once more, and I set the phone down on the mattress, putting the call on speaker phone so Carson and I could finish changing but still listen in

Carson was done first, turning to me for direction. “First aid under the sink in the bathroom. Ice, frozen peas, or carrots, or whatever the fuck you can find in the freezer-”

I heard some muffling on the call, most likely Dylan talking to Isiah, and as soon as he said the words “Ryker’s father,” I added one last request to my husband before he left.

“Duffel bag, locked cabinet of the back closet.”

And Carson didn’t even question it. He just nodded, while I rushed to our closet to grab my thick, wool trenchcoat.

“Speed limit, Carson,” I told him. It was a gentle reminder, not a reprimand.

And he nodded, understanding. More cops were always out on the streets this time of night, and a stop would only prolong things.

I had my eyes peeled to the road as we made it into Molly’s neck of the woods. The streets had died down, seeing as it was one in the morning. As we pulled onto 26th, I got my eyes peeled for the homes with their porch lights still on, and it didn’t take long before I saw two familiar kids standing outside of one of the homes on what seemed like an otherwise empty street.

Carson pulled his SUV right out front of the home, barely throwing the car into park before I snatched the first aid and ice, and got out on the passenger side.

“Dylan! Isiah!” I called, jogging towards them. I noticed they had both seemed to calm down, still a bit shaken, but calm enough for me to work with. Isiah had some scrapes that had torn his suit a bit, especially around his arms and legs, but I didn’t see any blood.

“Dad!” Dylan replied as soon as he saw me, rushing into my arms. “I-I didn’t know what to do- I didn’t know who to call-”

“Shh shh shh,” I whispered, calming him as I tucked his head into my neck a moment, kissing his forehead before I eventually had to let him go. “What happened, Dylan?” I asked my son, but I placed the bag of frozen peas in my son’s hand. “And hold this to Isiah’s eye.” My son listened to me immediately, letting go so I could gently pull Isiah in for a careful hug, before crouching down quickly to examine his knees.

That was where most of the scrapes were.

“I-… I guess Ryker- that guy I told you about- h-he stopped by to talk to Isiah and- and I guess-” Dylan cut his words clean off, which made me look up at my son. But he was staring at Isiah with uncertainty in his eyes. In both of theirs, rather.

“Now isn’t the time for your secrets, boys. I want the whole fucking truth,” I snapped as gently as I could at them.

“He… h-he…” Dylan tried to get out, but it was Isiah who finally managed.

“R-Ryker kissed me a-and-… and next thing I know I was being pulled back over the hood a-and onto the pavement. B-But then he- him- R-Ryker’s dad, he started beating Ryker and I- like- I tried to stop it-”

“Who’s Ryker’s dad?” I asked both of them, already removing the scissors from the first aid, so I could cut open some of Isiah’s tights just to make sure there wasn’t any blood I couldn’t see.

As far as I could tell, everything looked okay. Nothing needing a trip to the hospital.

“Simon,” Isiah replied. “Parker.” He then added, his own features riddled with straight concern, and my face immediately tensed.

“Do you know him?” Dylan asked me. I gave him one short, curt nod before I stood up, hearing Carson soon join us from the parked car. He pulled both boys in for a reassuring hug.

“Alright, have any of you two drunk even the slightest bit of liquor?” I already knew the answer, but they both shook their heads quickly. “Good. Dylan, drive Isiah to our home. Take the first aid and frozen peas with you. Treat the scrapes with some rubbing alcohol, ointment, and gauze, then just wait for Carson and I. Do you have both your keys and phone on you?”

Dylan nodded quickly.

“Charged?” I asked.

Dylan nodded again. “Eighty percent.”

“Good. Good , son,” I replied, thanking the heavens that my being on this kid’s case about always having a charged phone was finally about to pay off. “Go. Carson and I will handle the rest, alright?” Dylan nodded, but then I shifted my eyes to Isiah, understanding what exactly sparked that fear in them to begin with. “He’ll be okay,” I assured him gently. “I’ll take care of it, Isiah. I just need you and Dylan off the streets and in my home safe, alright?”

Isiah nodded quickly.

“Dylan, message me when you’re home. If you need anything while I’m out with Carson, you already know who to call, right?” Dylan nodded. “Good. Don’t go back to Molly’s, just go straight home. Whatever stuff you left there, I’ll come get in the morning,” I then ordered both boys, watching them both nod silently before they headed down the street towards a vehicle parked some ways down that I now recognized as mine.

Dylan unlocked the doors and helped Isiah in before he jogged quickly to the driver’s side and climbed in himself.

“What’s the address?” Carson asked, remaining at my side before he separated to head over to the driver’s side of his own SUV.

“Chop shop on Lake and Central,” I replied to him above the top of the car. Carson simply nodded, knowing these streets now just as well as I did, and we climbed back inside the warm vehicle

“Carson?” I whispered to my husband after some time.

For the most part, this ride had been taken in complete and utter silence. No radio, no nothing. Just him and I sitting with our own thoughts.

“It’s okay,” Carson replied gently to me. “Whatever you decide to do, I’ll be right there with you… So don’t you dare ask me to wait in the fucking car, Don.”

Carson’s words had my head finally turning his way for the first time since we started driving. We were only about five minutes away, well into the sketchier parts of town already, and whatever was about to be said had to be said.

Carson…“ I whispered a bit more quietly. “Y-You… you don’t ha-”

“As your husband, yes, yes the actual fuck I do, “ he replied, glancing at me a moment. “There hasn’t been any part of you that I’ve ever run from before, Don, and that won’t start tonight. Whatever you choose to do, I’ll stay right at your side. Isn’t this why we brought the duffel?” He asked. But his words commanded that I let every last one sink in before I found myself giving him a slow nod.

“When you pull in,” I explained, reaching forward to open the glove compartment in front of me, “I want you turn your high beams on. Keep the car running and the beams on. Open all four car doors, got it?”

Carson quickly nodded, only looking over for a fraction of a second as I pulled out and started to slip on the leather gloves I kept there.

“Whatever I do, don’t focus on me,” I continued. “Just make sure your eyes remain in the shop. Whatever happens, make sure Ryker is safe first.”

Carson nodded again, focusing on the road now as we saw the small chop shop coming into view at the corner of the intersecting roads.

“Don,” he whispered, before turning the car into the shop’s entrance- the driveway that led right to the old school garage door, which I noticed was slightly open, not locked down all the way. “Whatever you do tonight… I just want you to know that my love for you surpasses it. That man hurt Isiah, and that’s genuinely enough for me.”

I found myself turning to my husband again as I unbuckled my seatbelt, watching as he flipped his high beams on and pulled right up to the silver, metal garage door. Then I replied in an equal tone, “That’s enough for me as well,” before I pulled the handle attached to the passenger side door and opened it, letting myself out.

There was some commotion inside the shop. I could hear someone yelling incoherently- recognizing that voice- but it quieted once I stalked right up to the garage and simply knocked on it.

Then all commotion in the shop stilled immediately.

“We’re closed!” That familiar voice barked my way. I knocked again, not answering him with words. “I said we’re fucking closed!” That voice spat out through the metal door, but I heard footsteps coming closer, and when the garage door started to slide open, I had to brace myself- the anger I could feel quickly overtook me by the muffled cries of someone else inside. “I said were fucking clo-”

That was all Simon got out as that garage door was opened, the high beams blinding him just enough for my left fist to coil back, swing upwards, and make direct, full contact with this shorter man’s chin, throwing him back into the now well-lit garage thanks to the headlights, as his body collapsed on the floor from the force.

That first hit wasn’t held in the slightest. I let my anger go with that one to take the edge off, not even feeling any pain in my hand, though I knew I probably had some damage to my knuckles.

The shorter, stockier man was wearing an oil-stained white t-shirt, now covered in blood, and some black jeans, but I forced myself not to focus there. On the blood I knew wasn’t his. The first person I located was Ryker, and he was curled up on the floor to the right of me, right in front of the couch that was up against the right wall.

Then the next thing I took in was the two other men sitting in chairs on the back wall in direct line of the high beams, who had dropped their beers on the floor as they registered the blinding lights and their boss now lying some feet away holding his chin while blood filled his mouth.

The last thing I did was locate a weapon. A crowbar was lying on the floor to my left, near a jacked-up car. I took the few steps needed to bend down and grab hold of the greasy thing, but my leather gloves gave me a better grip.

“Wh-What-” Simon choked, trying to get up. And his two workers had stood from their seats finally, one man reaching behind him for something until he and I heard that same familiar sound I did, having spent eight perfect years with my Texan-raised husband.

It was the sound of a shotgun’s operator manually loading a shell into the chamber. He called it racking the slide.

“Reach for it, and I’ll shoot,” Carson spoke from right behind me. I didn’t hesitate at the sound, but I was pleasantly surprised by how fast Carson had loaded that gun to begin with. Eight years later, and he was as good as his damn grandfather now.

Instead, I took a few steps forward towards Simon, who was starting to try to pick himself off his shop’s oily floor. As soon as he got to a knee, I swung that crowbar back with my left hand and struck him directly across the face, knocking some teeth clean out of his bloody mouth right before his body toppled to the side.

“ Simon fucking Parker, “ those words fell past my lips, laced in venom. “Ten years my fucking junior. Been a while, hasn’t it?”

Simon scrambled, his eyes growing wide as he recognized my voice.

“I didn’t think we’d ever have to cross paths again,” I continued, watching the blood coat over the blood of who I could only assume was his own son’s. This… this haunting image in particular brought back unfond memories. That apartment with my own father. The final day I saw him before I left for college. “I let the chop shop stay during that land agreement with the county fifteen years ago because I knew you had a son to raise. To provide for…”

As soon as Simon raised his bloody face high enough, I delivered a swift kick to his jawbone with my right foot, knocking him onto his back again hard. The sound alone- the cracking of his jaw- was heard distinctly though the shop. One of his men tried to move that hand again, but Carson didn’t hesitate to shoot, sending a bullet directly through the man’s arm, and the cry he let out echoed off these dirty, cement walls.

“But now I’m realizing you don’t know the meaning of raising anything but a fucking glass of whiskey to toast to nothing worth a damn,” I spat in his direction.

I could see Ryker slowly starting to uncurl his bloody body, his eyes wide and terrified, but I just made note of where he was. The condition he was in. I was going to have to help him up after this, which meant that whatever he saw tonight, he would just have to endure.

I would do my best to apologize after for forcing him to watch all this.

“Tonight you laid hands on a kid who is like a son to me. Something I simply won’t let slide.” I approached his body, that face of his so bloody it wasn’t even recognizable. A broken jaw, fractured nerves, and at least six teeth gone were what I’d put money on. My body crouched lower on his right side, some steps away from Ryker, who had started to cough up a bit of blood. “ Something I think you should die for, “ I whispered those words harshly to him.

Simon was starting to gasp, coughing up more blood that he was now choking on. So I decided to help him as I switched that crowbar to my right hand so my left could capture his fucking throat, pressing my thumb and pointer finger deep into the tissue and skin.

Simon’s dark brown eyes were wide, only growing wider as I started to squeeze, cutting off all oxygen for him.

“But I’m just here to send you a little message,” I continued, staring him down with a degree of hatred I hadn’t felt in decades, the pain-filled moans from Ryker only adding as fuel to the fire raging through every sensible part of me. “You so much as breathe the same fucking oxygen as Isiah Jacobs and I won’t just come for your shop- your livelihood …”

I could still hear the wails of the one man Carson had shot, and the sound of the gun going off let me know we couldn’t stay here long, so I moved quickly. Too many cops out tonight.

“I promise you… I’ll simply come back here and kill you my fucking self, “ I seethed, lifting the man by his neck, before I slammed his head right back onto the garage’s concrete floor, and knocked the man out cold.

Then I turned my head to Ryker. He was still looking up at me, terrified, but he was starting to sit up more against the bottom edge of the couch, gathering his breath. His face was a bloody mess.

“Get up, Ryker,” I told him, approaching the shaking boy to slip a hand under the arm he had slowly raised for me.

“M-M-M-” he started, but I shushed him gently, helping him to his feet and bearing most of his weight in the process. We started to slowly walk towards the car with the high beams on, Carson’s gun still aimed at the two men who were still conscious, and I found myself tossing the bloody crowbar back where I had found it near the entrance.

Then I raised my available arm, the one not keeping Ryker up, so I could reach for the handle and pull down, closing the metal door to the garage. Only after did Carson lower the weapon, sensing we had to get out of here now . He started making his way back to the vehicle.

While I helped Ryker the rest of the way into the back seat of the car, Carson unloaded his gun, put it back into the duffel, then moved that bag from the back seat to the trunk before he and I shut both back doors on either side of the SUV and slid into the front seats.

Not a single word was said by anyone while Carson peeled out of the garage driveway. On this side of town, it took a bit until the cops arrived, but I wanted distance between us and this chop shop by then.

Ryker was breathing heavy, trying to stabilize himself from the back seat. I peeled off the bloody gloves I was wearing and folded them in on themselves, wondering where I should place them, but Carson was quick to signal back to the glove compartment before he brought his hand back on the gear shift.

“Thank you,” I spoke the very first words uttered into this car after we all piled in, and ended up opening the compartment to toss the soiled leather into.

Then Carson released the shift gear for another second, lifting the center console to hand me something.

A package of disinfectant wipes.

“For… for your face,” he explained gently. “I’m always stocked thanks to Dylan’s perpetually sticky hands.”

And that just made me smile as I gladly accepted them. When I tore a wipe off to bring to my face, welcoming the cool solution, my eyes widened somewhat at the amount of blood that had splattered onto me when the once white sheet came into focus completely red. It brought on yet another memory, but I tried to push it down.

“Thank you,” I said again, tossing the dirty wipe in the glove compartment with the gloves.

“Of course, Carson replied, giving me a slight, warm smile.

And it was in that moment, I was forced to question something rather perplexing:

Whether Carson was absolutely freaking out inside, having just seen his husband damn near kill someone- it would’ve taken only a bit more force if I had really wanted to- or if I had just married an undercover psychopath.

Carson then asked, “Where to? Home?” But I shook my head no.

“24-hour pharmacy on 66th, then the Brookside Apartments.”

And I watched as Carson’s eyes widened slightly at my request, but he just gave me a nod, trusting that I knew what I was doing.

••

61. Tend To Your Wounds, pt. 2

Upload 7/8 today!

I am currently writing the last chapter but I might get the first chapter of the new book up before the last one of this one

We’ll see how the cookie crumbles after lunch

xoxo

Carson

Don had had me wait in the car with Ryker while he went inside the pharmacy to grab what he needed.

The car was now silent, besides Ryker’s heavier breaths. He hadn’t said a single word, but there was something now eating away at me after having known a bit more about how complicated this whole thing had gotten tonight.

“Don’s timing belt issue with his SUV a few weeks ago. That was you, wasn’t it?”

… The car had been silent the entire time I sat in it with Ryker, but the silence was even more deafening after what I just asked.

“That was a pretty sly move on your part. Took skill to create a failure like that. If it didn’t cost my husband thousands of dollars to fix, I’d have to applaud you on knowing your way around a car like that. Especially a luxury vehicle.”

Still, more silence. And given his state, I wasn’t looking for an answer. What Ryker said next, however, did surprise me.

“W-What-” he inhaled sharply a second. “What are y-you going- t-to do with me?”

The way he asked that, you’d think Don and I were hit men or human traffickers or something.

“Well, considering my husband is probably buying up half the pharmacy as we speak, I’m assuming it’s more along the lines of helping your critical condition and less along the lines of selling your organs on the black market if you catch my drift,” I replied, eyeing him through the rearview mirror.

He was resting back against the passenger rear door, holding his stomach tight. Even through the darkness of this parking lot, I could see the blood all over his face. The bruises across it, and some of the blood spots on his hoodie that were darker than the dark blue material.

“W-Why?” Ryker asked, but just as he did, I saw a man finally exit the front doors of the store with two large paper bags in his hands.

It was a good thing he wiped his face down because he-… well… there-… there was a lot of blood splatter there. His all-black attire must’ve hidden whatever else splashed on him when he delivered those bone-chilling blows to Simon’s face.

And I had more questions than I did answers. Like, for starters, I wanted to know what land deal Don had spoken to Simon about. If it happened fifteen years ago, that was only a few years after he had joined John. He hadn’t been working in real estate for Bellington then… at least I didn’t think, according to Don.

All that took a back seat, however, when I opened up my car door and walked around to get the door for Don before he climbed into the SUV with the bags in his hands. I helped him with his seatbelt next and buckled him in, then closed his door and walked back around to my side.

“Get everything you need, love?” I asked him while I settled in, and he nodded, giving me a kind smile. “Brookside, then?” I followed with, earning me another nod.

It was only after we pulled out of the parking lot that Ryker asked the same question again. “W-Why are you-… helping?” His voice came out as a rasp, but it gave me some hope that if he could at least talk, perhaps his injuries weren’t as bad as I initially thought. As bad as they looked.

Yet then again… Don had bought a lot from the pharmacy.

“I… I f-fucked up Dylan’s car-”

“ Actually ,“ Don cut in as he glanced back at Ryker through the mirror himself. “That SUV is my car. And while I’m still enraged about the fix… knowing now what I know- about who that father of yours is… I’m willing to extend an ounce of grace tonight. After what you did to Isiah, though, that’s all I’m extending.”

“I- I didn’t- m-my dad-”

“Was your father the one who kissed Isiah, too?” Don asked him, silencing this whole damn car.

And I think that was when I finally saw the full picture.

Ryker hadn’t just hurt Isiah with that kiss.

He had hurt Dylan.

And god be with anyone who could even get close enough to Dylan to do something like that. Don was seeing this from every angle and every perspective. He knew that Ryker was facing abuse, and he understood that too, much better than I did, because for how many things he bought from that pharmacy, he couldn’t have been in and out in less than ten minutes tops.

He knew what this kid needed… and I didn’t even want to think of how he knew just what to buy without even examining him first.

The ride remained silent for the rest of the twenty minutes we had to reach the apartments my husband and I owned. Don had already said something so real and damning that what I wanted to say to my husband now wasn’t meant for anyone else’s ears, and Ryker sure as shit had nothing to say back to that.

And so… we drove in complete silence. Don kept his eyes peeled much to the road like I had, with the hand he had placed on my thigh as all the reassurance I needed that tonight would be okay. Things would be alright. The man who damn near handled it all was once again in control, and like always, he made me feel secure and safe in passing the reins back to him.

It was only when we finally pulled into the lot for the apartments that Ryker said something. It came as more of a scoff, really, than anything else, and the visible irritation on Don’s face wasn’t missed when the kid’s raspy voice said, “B-Brookside. F-Fuck are we doing at this money-” he inhaled sharply again, “laundering piece of real estate bullshit?”

“Money laundering?” Don asked, turning his head slightly to acknowledge Ryker.

“B-Bunch of rich fucks bought it- should’ve-” another sharp inhale hit him. “-gone to folks on this side of town.”

“It did,” Don replied, turning his head forward again. “I own it now with my husband-”

“ Of c-course you fucking… do ,“ Ryker muttered; however, Don’s next words cut through like a sharp dagger.

“It will be subsidized housing again… just like it once was when I lived here with my father over forty years ago.”

Don helped the now quiet kid out of the car.

Ryker hadn’t said shit else to either of us after that revelation.

Something told me he only knew about who Don was now. The kid knew nothing of my husband’s past. And the fact that Don requested we come here in the first place let me know that it wasn’t just Ryker who was going to learn more. I could feel my own heartbeat start to quicken, unsure of what my husband had in store for us tonight.

But that… that sharp look in his eyes. It didn’t subside, not even after we left the chop shop. I had only ever seen it a handful of times from my husband in the past, and this-

This was by far the longest it had ever remained with him.

Don and I had renovated every single apartment and floor of this building…

All but one. There was one single unit he requested to leave locked and completely untouched by renovations.

Of course I had questions.

But I never asked them.

Don asked not touch it, so we had construction work around it. And it was still a space I had never once stepped into. I never asked to.

That was a door only Don could open for me, and he’d do so when he was ready. If he was ever ready, and it was okay if he never was. I never once brought it up.

Security was top-notch at this place, the same security as The Alpines, which Don had finally admitted to me while we were having breakfast in bed during our weekend trip in New Jersey, that this security was Mr. Bellington’s. He disclosed the same thing to Dylan, and if anything went left, that was the number Don had directed him to call tonight.

If anything had gone wrong tonight, something told me that I’d be meeting Mr. Bellington a whole lot sooner than New Years.

As much as the man left me uneasy… it was reassuring knowing that Don had that kind of protection. That Dylan now did, too. And as I thought about Harry- about Bellington’s involvement- I realized that Dylan had that protection the second he entered Don’s life.

If Mr. Bellington knew about our trip, I now understood that I had that kind of protection as well.

While I would’ve brought my guns regardless, in order to protect Don, I shot freely, knowing there was someone capable of cleaning any mess created in that garage tonight. That mysterious man had done it time and time again, choosing to buy out the whole apartment building and hide Don’s father away.

Perhaps that was why Don held his hits tonight. Bellington was always there, but that was only ever for absolute emergencies. Meant to be used sparingly, like eight years in between, for instance. My husband was more than capable of handling anything less.

I ended up helping Ryker myself while Don removed the bags of medical items, then led us inside. The building had 24-hour security and surveillance. Only the first door was open, but the second door required both a code and a door key fob.

Don removed from his pocket a master ring with a few apartment fob keys we had only started to register with the system, and we planned to register the rest in the next few months so we could get ready for our opening.

A security guard greeted us right at the second door, but didn’t bat an eyelash as Don and I walked through with Ryker limping in, holding onto my large frame.

“Any requests needed this evening, sir?” The front desk attendant asked a few feet away, but Don shook his head.

“My husband will be in and out for the next few hours,” he told Jarold, the front desk clerk who was also part of the security detail, and Jarold nodded, understanding. Whatever this security was, they had clearly seen enough shit for them to be this unfazed.

We headed towards the elevators next on our left, Don bending down with the bags in his hand so he could press the button open, before guiding us inside. “Which floor, baby?” I asked him, not knowing where we were going from here, but I was closest to the buttons to push them with my free hand.

And his answer was what solidified my previous thoughts. “The third,” he replied, finally shifting his gaze to meet mine when he saw me hover over the button. It was the slight nod he gave me that had me pressing it.

Ryker was injured, and I knew my husband would get him the necessary treatment for it… But right now, he wanted to show Ryker something- a part of him to make sure this kid understood more of why the fuck we were all here in the first place.

We ended up riding to the third floor in silence, and at this point, I was getting rather used to the silence. It was easy to see that whatever Ryker could say, Don had a cutthroat answer for. Not even I had the gall to test his patience tonight.

Once those elevator doors opened, Don walked out first, leading us to the apartment on the far end of the left side hallway. The one door in this place I hadn’t been through before. I watched as my husband set the bags of medical supplies on the marble floors before he dug into his pocket to pull out an old-fashioned key.

We hadn’t even changed the locks on this one.

I could see Ryker’s bloody eyebrows scrunch together in some confusion while I held him up easily, but Don paused after we heard the lock click open. He then turned back to Ryker and I.

“You’re injured,” my husband stated matter-of-factly to the kid. “I’ll take care of that soon, but right now I want to address something regarding what you said in the car on the drive here.”

“I-I didn’t- I didn’t mean-” Ryker attempted, trying to backtrack now, but Don wasn’t having it.

“When you look at my son, you think you know him.” My husband’s words were low. Threatening . “You look at him and think he comes from a rich and lavish lifestyle. You might think his father hands him anything he could ever ask for, given who his father is. Who I am.”

Ryker’s head hung a bit lower now, yet he was listening. He for damn sure was listening.

“But if you are to entrust me with your care, I suppose it’s time you understand more about my son through someone who raised him. Who I was before I became who I am now.”

Don’s gaze shifted up to mine, saying more with his eyes than words could ever say, but I just nodded. Whatever he was about to show me was going to hurt me. He knew it was. I knew it fucking was. But I’d take this, too, in strides.

“My father was an abusive alcoholic. I spent almost a decade of my life in this once hellhole with him, after my mother passed, taking that abuse head-on. And if you know what these apartments are now, Ryker, then you knew what they once were.”

Ryker hung his head even lower, unwilling to even attempt to meet my husband’s sharp gaze.

“I own the place now, yet this one unit remains completely untouched. Tonight I’ll grant you more sympathy because my old man just died a few weeks ago, and I’m still riding the high that his send off was my husband, myself, and my son dumping his ashes into our bathroom’s toilet drain and flushing them… but that won’t wash away my past, nor what your future might look like if you stay with your own old man.”

I found myself taking the deepest breath in, preparing for whatever hell was behind that door as Don turned, then reached for the knob.

“Because of my sympathy, I’ll only show you a glimpse into it. If and when you’re ready for a full tour, I’ll give you one. A thorough one. I’ll show you the cracked porcelain in the bathroom where my bones were smashed in. The chips in the wood of the cabinets that he would slam in on my limbs. For tonight though… I think just opening this door will be enough.”

Once he pushed that door open, I saw him reach almost instinctively for the light switch on the right side. And as he opened the door more for Ryker and I to step through, both me and this kid stopped dead in our fucking tracks.

I was staring into the open space of a living room… if you could even call it that.

The short entry hall leading into the living room had punched holes in the walls.

No…

Every single fucking wall in this home did .

The furniture still inside was ancient and barely held together, but not just by the years that had passed. The small dining table had chips and deep scratches all over the surface. The old tan couch in the living room was torn, but it was the deep red stains all over it that made my stomach churn.

And as I looked down at the carpet, I could only fucking stare at it.

The supposedly once white carpet was almost completely covered in deep, large red stains. There were more blood stains than white remaining.

I could feel Ryker’s body start to shiver in my hold as he stared at what I did. This place was something out of a fucking horror movie, forcing my eyes away as I quickly started to feel a wave of nausea.

For maybe the first time since I knew who Mr. Bellington even was to Don… I finally understood their connection. That attachment they had.

That man had saved Don’s fucking life. Literally. Saved his life .

I now understood why Don had never shown me this before.

If he had, I would’ve killed his father myself.

My husband inhaled deeply, taking another step or two in before he turned to Ryker and I to block some of this horror with his frame. I watched as Don’s eyes softened ever so slightly at the kid, and as I slowly looked down, I noticed a few clear droplets now on my leather shoes.

Ryker was crying.

He hadn’t made a single sound, but I could see more droplets fall, starting to turn a light shade of red from the blood the saltwater cleaned his face with.

“Do you understand now?” Don asked this kid.

And I simply watched as Ryker ever so slightly nodded.

“Good. Now will you let me make sure you don’t leave this earth prematurely and in a fucking body bag?” Don asked. Ryker lightly nodded again. My husband’s gaze then shifted to mine, watching my own eyes gloss over at a man I was seeing in an entirely different light now. I could see his face starting to break, but I quickly shook my head no. He was wondering whether this was too much for me, and it was, but not in the way he thought.

I still felt honored to be let in on this part of him, however fucking horrific it was.

“Good,” was all Don finally said before he lifted the ring of key fobs in his hand. “My patience has already been worn thin tonight, Ryker, so I’m going to speak clearly and directly when I say that I will only offer my help if you are willing to receive it. Understood?”

Ryker slowly nodded.

“Good. Now stick out your hand,” he directed Ryker.

I watched as the kid’s hand slowly extended out in front of him.

“From now on, your unit is 418. This is where you’ll stay from now until you’re back on your feet.” Don removed a registered fob key and dropped it into Ryker’s open, blood-covered hand. “I’ve been patching myself up for years, as you can clearly see,” Don gestured to the apartmewnt unit behind him, “so tonight, I’ll stay here and take care of you while Carson goes to check on my kids, then he and I will stay here tonight and check on you again in the morning after we go get your car. They’re doing some street cleaning tomorrow, and I don’t want it impounded.”

Don looked up again, confirming this action plan, but I was already nodding. After seeing this apartment, something told me he needed some time alone with this kid. This… this horror was something I couldn’t-

It was something I wouldn’t even try to begin to relate to.

I wasn’t even sure what I was going to say to my husband after seeing this, besides that I loved him. I loved him so fucking much, and I was just praying that the look I was giving him now made him understand just how much he was fucking loved. By me. By Dylan. By everyone he let into his life.

“You’ll recover for a week, with me checking in daily to help you heal, then, if things improve, I expect you to return to your classes.”

I could feel Ryker wanting to protest, but I knew he wasn’t going to say jack shit after this. Not after the apartment he and I could still see the horrors of, even with Don’s tall frame blocking some of it.

“You’re going to bust your ass and finish this last fucking year you’ve got left. And I’m going to get you a job for after school because you will be paying rent to stay here. A reasonable amount, all things considered. Smoking inside isn’t permitted indoors, but your unit has a balcony. Curfew will be ten at night unless I approve otherwise, and all guests entering this building will be cleared by me first. Do you understand?”

Ryker slowly nodded again, closing his hand tighter on his new apartment’s doorkey.

“Good,” Don replied. “That’s settled then. It would be my honor to welcome you to the Brookside Apartments as our very first tenant.”

Ryker simply nodded while I helped the kid out of the entryway, with Don flipping off the light to this fucking hellscape of a place.

“Oh, and Ryker?” Don added, having Ryker and I turn back to my husband as he closed the door on this part of his past. “My son and my husband are my entire world,” he said, keeping his head lowered to lock up the place. “Isiah is like a second son to me, and any one of these people they find love for is an extension of my world that has earned my protection. Fuck with any of them again, and I’ll put you in a goddamn body bag myself.”

I felt a deep shiver run through this kid.

Hell, I shivered myself, but not from fear of Don’s chilling words. It was from the fierceness in his eyes as he turned to us again.

“Oh, and fuck with my car again, and I’ll have yours demolished at an impound lot without a second fucking thought. If I can do that with no thought in mind, I want you to imagine the hell I will inflict onto you if I grant myself a sit-down.”

••

62. A Night For The Books

Upload 8/8 today!

Gahhhhdayum my people we made itttt

Omg, just 2 chapters over my 60 chapter projection

Anywho, I’m now off to get more edited for the new book, so look out for that

Oh, and I’ll post my whole sappy love yous at some point on this chapter

xoxo

Dylan

I drove Isiah and I home in silence.

He didn’t know what to say.

I didn’t know what I should say.

It was a mess.

In fact, if it wasn’t for my dad just being my dad, I probably would’ve had like seven crashouts between the time I found Isiah, and us now just being a few minutes away from The Alpines.

I was fucking livid about a lot of things. Like the fact that Ryker had fucking kissed Isiah, first and foremost. The fact that he thought it was even okay to just show up at Molly’s party like that.

Trust me, I understood that it was the guy’s birthday, but that crossed so many fucking lines that I couldn’t even begin to start working through my anger. But as my hands tightened on that steering wheel while I pulled the car into The Alpines compound, I forced myself to focus on what mattered most.

Isiah.

He was still holding those frozen peas to his face. His Halloween costume was ruined, especially after my dad had to cut it open.

And worst of all… he hadn’t told me about how bad Ryker’s situation was before. He hadn’t told me about how Ryker’s dad was with him.

This felt like the first big secret he had kept from me… and I didn’t know how to process it. Had I known Ryker’s dad could act like that- had I known he was that homophobic- I could’ve never been okay with Isiah still hanging around there. I mean, he had had a friends-with-benefits relationship with Ryker himself. I didn’t even want to think of what might’ve happened if Ryker’s dad found out while Isiah was over there, and not two blocks from Molly’s home.

I was currently trying to do everything my father had equipped me with to settle my strong emotions.

Taking deep breaths. Counting backwards. Refocus. Happy fucking thoughts- all of it .

Nothing was working.

So I just didn’t say anything at all.

Instead, I opened up the entrance to the underground parking, got the car parked near the entrance inside, killed the engine, and got out with the first aid kit in hand. Isiah only made it about two steps out of the vehicle before he closed the door to find that I was already crouching down in front of him.

“Get on, Isiah,” I told him.

“D-D-Dylan, I-I’m fi-”

“Isiah, if I hear you say you’re fine one more time, I’m going to fucking loseit. Now get. On .”

My tone was anything but happy-go-lucky right now, and that finally got Isiah moving as he carefully climbed onto my back. We had to look utterly ridiculous in our costumes, but I didn’t give a shit. I just locked the car doors and made it inside with him.

Isiah wrapped his arms tighter around my neck, naturally melting into my warm back, and when he placed his head on my shoulder, I took a deep, slow breath.

It was something so small… and yet it still comforted me. It let me know that this night hadn’t ruined absolutely everything for us. It made me more hopeful that once we finally got inside, and once I was able to get a good look at his injuries, we could just talk about what happened.

So I tried to focus on that instead. I put all my focus there, on not just feeling, but fixing .

We can fix this , I told myself over and over again, until I was through the elevator climb with Isiah, and eventually let us through to our penthouse. Isiah slowly started to detach himself, but my hands gripped his thighs tighter, keeping him on my back while I kicked my shoes off and turned on the lights to the home. Then I locked up the front door, before walking us straight through the living room and down the corridor towards my bedroom.

Isiah didn’t say anything. He just allowed this. I opened up my bedroom, switched on the overhead light and dimmed it, then I walked over, turned around, and gently sat onto my bed with Isiah still on my back. That was when he eventually let me go.

First thing I did was remove his shoes and quickly strip down to my briefs, pulling the whole costume off so I could change into joggers and a casual shirt. Then I turned around to Isiah, who was still holding the frozen peas to his face.

I bent down to gently take them from him before setting them on the side of my bed. Isiah still had his head lowered, staring at his hands that were fidgeting like crazy in his lap.

And just- seeing that alone- how fucking scared he was… I just- I couldn’t do it anymore.

I bent down on my knees and carefully reached for his hands, wrapping my large ones completely around them.

His body was shaking, but he had tensed his muscles up, trying to force them to stop. He didn’t want me to see.

“Isiah,” I whispered quietly to him, lowering myself onto the back of my ankles so I could see him better. Those eyes of his were glossed over, welling with tears. “I’m sorry for tonight. I’m sorry f-”

“N-No,” Isiah rushed. “D-Don’t apologize- please- please don’t say sorry right now.”

“ But I am ,“ I replied with an even gentler tone. “I’m sorry. And I’m… I’m not mad at you, Isiah. I’m more angry at myself for not being there to protect you.”

I felt the first few drops of his silent tears splash onto my hands, and he tried to pull his hands out of mine, but I held them tighter.

“I should’ve-… about Ryker-… about his dad, I shou-”

“You were being a good friend, weren’t you?” I reminded both him and myself. All this… Ryker liking Isiah… Ryker’s dad… Isiah not telling me about- about the abuse…

I had to remind myself what it really stemmed from.

Isiah’s kind heart.

“We hadn’t talked for a year, Isiah. I really don’t want you to believe you could’ve ever made another connection as strong as ours, because I very selfishly want to be the only one in your life you ever share something this special with… but I won’t fault you for trying. I won’t fight you for helping those who needed it, either.”

“I was honestly with him,” Isiah whispered, finally lifting his gaze to catch mine. “Back then, I was honest. Even tonight, I was honest again. I’ve only ever loved you, Dylan. I’ve only ever wanted to be with you.”

“I know,” I told him. “ I know . And there’s probably at least fifty more people at our school who have a crush on you as we speak. Knowing someone else sees in you what I do… I don’t hate Ryker for that. Now, will I ever be cool with him again after tonight? Probably fucking not. But I don’t hate Ryker for falling in love with you the way I did… I just hate the fact that this could’ve happened somewhere I couldn’t reach you, you getting hurt, and it-“

I felt the words catch in my throat, struggling to work through my own overwhelming emotion just fucking thinking about it.

“It could have been worse. And that’s terrifying to know. I’ve lived through getting hit for something I shouldn’t have been hit for. Tonight just-” I took another deep breath in. “Tonight just scared me.”

More tears started to roll down Isiah’s face as he shifted his gaze, unable to stop them. “I’m so fucking sorry,” he mumbled soft, but I secured my hold on his hands, just like I used to do when we were younger.

“Your anxiety has been bad for you this year, Isiah. Between us, navigating our relationship after mending our friendship, to you trying to help Ryker through everything he’s going through… this has been a lot for you. And now you’ve been hauling ass for our final year, and I just-… how can I take the load off? How do I carry some of that weight for you?”

That made Isiah glance back at me, tears welling once again.

“Why do you have to be so damn perfect all the time?” He whispered. “I feel like I keep hurting you… and you… You keep finding ways for us to work through it. I… I don’t know how the fuck you aren’t sick of me yet.”

“Because, Isiah… there isn’t another single person in my life besides my father who would’ve known I need Bonine for my vertigo except for you,” I whispered back. “The only other person in this fucking world who knows I still have nightmares besides my parents is you, Isiah. You know my emotions sometimes better than I do. And you might think these are little things, but to me they aren’t.”

Isiah tried to blink more tears away, and I watched the droplets fall from his beautiful eyes. It was a sin how much it broke me to see him like this.

“They aren’t little to me because you cared enough to remember. My mother birthed me, and she knew less in 10 years about me than my father learnt in about three months. So years don’t mean a fucking thing to me, Isiah. It’s the fact that you cared enough to know me, the real me, and grew with me.”

I slowly released the hold over Isiah’s hands and instead reached for each one with my other, tracing slow circles of the backs of them, near his knuckles.

“You think you might care too much, but Ryker getting any help from my dad tonight is because you were involved. Even tonight. That fear in your eyes wasn’t from what Ryker’s dad did to you. You were genuinely terrified of what he might do to Ryker. And that is the Isiah I know- the Isiah I’m in love with, okay?” I asked him.

Isiah slowly nodded, not running from my gaze now.

“So the answer is no , a little anxiety won’t scare me away. I put you through years of me being on edge at sleepovers, away from my dad. You learnt how to soothe me- to hold me when I was frightened… and I promise you, Isiah, I’ll never tire from doing the same. I’m going to learn you- this part of you- okay? Just like you did for me then, and just like you do for me now. A relationship is a give-and-take. If we’re equals with everything else, then we’re equals here too. You can’t be there for everyone else and not let people be there for you. I won’t allow it.”

Isiah gripped my hands tight. Like really fucking tight. I knew he was searching for something to say, but I didn’t rush it. I was okay with doing the talking because I knew he was listening.

Those eyes of his held mine, telling me he was at least hearing every word.

“Tonight might not have turned out the way we thought it would… but that’s okay. As one of my dads likes to put it- the delusional one, not the stickler- what the hell is one day when we’ve got a lifetime? Now this is the same man who changes the years he’s been with my biological dad like he changes his underwear, so take most of what he says with a grain of salt-”

That got a soft chuckle out of Isiah, which made me smile. God, it felt like the first real smile he and I had shared in a lifetime after how horrible this night had gone.

“-but nevertheless, he spits facts every once in a while, even though it feeds into that delusion.”

And that earned me another soft chuckle.

“So fuck it if we don’t get to the rest of the party tonight. I know you wanted alone time in Molly’s bedroom, but we have so many more days to do it right… or do it super wrong the first time and learn to do it better the second, third, fourth, fifth time around. While unexpectedly heart-stopping that first kiss was… I think our second hit just a little harder, wouldn’t you say my fine sir?” I asked, and Isiah nodded right away.

“Indeed, it would. A-And I’m… I’m sor-”

“A thank you works better, you know,” I whispered with a grin, and Isiah nodded, his smile widening.

“Thank you,” he whispered.

“Any time I get to wear a cape, run down an empty sidewalk in NYC, and save my boyfriend, count me in,” I told him, and that smile on Isiah’s face was a bit more permanent, making my heartbeat quicken in a good way for a change tonight. “To quote our lord and savior, Superman, ‘it’s never as bad as it seems. You’re much stronger than you think you are, trust me.’ I think we gotta trust the man in a blue bodysuit, undies, and a dashing red cape, but that’s just my opinion, though. I did hear that he bagged an Amazonian baddie or whatever. Just something to think about. Food for thought.”

And Isiah full-on laughed at that, nodding again with a knowing smile. He knew exactly where that quote came from. H

“I also know a thing or two about drowning. But if you feel like that- like you can’t keep your head above the tide, Isiah, I’ll just come get you in a submarine and charge it to my dad’s credit card. We’ll work out a rescue party or something, alright?”

Isiah gave me a firm nod with a smile that finally touched his eyes. I’m glad he and I could still bond over the exploitation of my father.

“Good. Alright. We have that settled,” I gave his hands a first squeeze before softly letting go. “Fortunately, I’m going to have to perform a strip search. Unfortunately, this will be more of me stripping you down to assess the damage and then me searching for any additional cuts, no anal probing involved.”

Isiah released a whole comical sigh while I lifted him up to his feet so I could unfasten his belt and pull his shorts down first.

“Now, are we sold on the no anal probing? Or is there room for negotiation here?” He softly countered, making me laugh. “ Please don’t tell me I experienced douching for the first time for nothing. “

That made me laugh even harder. “If you can miraculously give me a full recovery from all sustained injuries in the next thirty minutes, I’ll reinstate it. Otherwise, no, I will not even be so much as breathing on you incorrectly tonight, or any night, until I know you’re okay. That and we probably have to tell your mum at some point about this, so we have to make this look more like you tripped going up the stairs and less like you got hit by a fucking car. She will be my other-in-law at some point. I can’t have her thinking I can’t protect you. Especially when I’m wearing a cape. That’s like superhero protocol 101.”

Isiah sighed a teasing sigh, but he nodded, turning around so I could zip the suit off him next.

Once he stepped out of the ruined material, I first did a once-over of him to make sure he was alright. He was only in his briefs, so I tried to move fast in case he was cold, but my dad was pretty spot on for injuries. Quite a few scrapes, but only a few had a couple droplets of dry blood. Really, it was just his face, which I had him place the frozen peas back on it, going on then off in increments of time as my father taught me.

And while I cleaned the cuts on Isiah’s upper body first so I could at least get him a long-sleeve shirt, I did think about that.

My dad.

Carson.

They had been so on go-mode, making sure everything was handled as quickly as possible so they could get us all off that street… that I didn’t even process what they might be doing next.

The only thing I knew was that things were being handled. Even through all that stress, my father was able to cut through it with his words, making a part of me go on autopilot just like he did.

Now that I was home, though, that autopilot was wearing out, and worry was settling in.

Once I got a sweater on Isiah, I then had him sit back on my bed so I could thoroughly clean his knees. They were pretty scraped up. I first wiped them with rubbing alcohol, then placed ointment as my dad said to, and last came the wrap.

Isiah was at ease now, making this much easier. He was opening up more. He was telling me a bit more about his conversation that happened with Ryker, and it warmed me to know that he liked what I had said earlier. About this being a give-and-take.

I reminded him that it was just like any project we had ever been paired up for. It was 50/50. And our academic integrity was always too high to slap our names on a project that we didn’t fairly contribute to.

Isiah admitted that he was just a bit worried that everything with Ryker’s abuse would trigger me… but I reminded him of just how solid my support system really was by saying, “my dad has only been in my life for eight years, technically I can probably milk him for another ten considering the ten he missed out on so we’re good,” and Isiah chuckled, lifting his right leg now so I could wrap up my handiwork.

Just as I was doing that, I heard the front door open. “Dylan! Isiah!” Carson called while I heard him kick off his shoes.

“In here!” I called back.

Carson made it to the open doorway of my bedroom quickly. I just finished tugging the wrap into itself when I turned on my knees to Carson, and Isiah looked up.

My eyes grew a bit wider when I noticed Carson’s eyes were a slight red and irritated. “Is everything okay?” I asked quickly.

“Yeah- yes,” Carson rushed out. “Ryker is with Don at The Brookside Apartments. He’ll be staying there for a while, but for now, Don is helping him with his injuries.”

“Is he okay?” Isiah asked, concern lacing his voice.

“Yeah,” Carson nodded. “He will be, don’t worry. Don wanted me to just stop by to check on you two, and grab some ice packs from the freezer. I’m not sure when he and I will be back, but just in case,” Carson then pulled out his phone from his pocket, “give me a list of shit you need, and I’ll get it done.”

That alone made me smile.

“So far I’ve got: pick up Ryker’s car and bring to Brookside, pick up stuff from Molly’s- oh yeah, what am I looking for again?”

“Isiah and I each brought our duffel bags. They’re in Molly’s room, which you will need-” I paused a moment, grabbing my own costume off the floor to rummage for something before I got off my knees, stood, and walked Molly’s key over to him. “You’ll need this. Her room’s locked right now, so maybe do that as soon as you can. Then again, she wasn’t planning on sleeping ther-”

“Spare me the details, kid,” Carson cracked a grin, making me chuckle as he took the key from me and shoved it into his jeans pocket. “Anything else?” He asked. I turned to Isiah, but he slowly shook his head no, and I did the same.

“Cool. Call me if you think of something. The Alpine’s staff is aware we’re out and are by the phones if you need anything else,” Carson explained, placing his phone back in his pocket. “Dylan, wanna walk me out?” He then asked, and I nodded.

Before I could leave the room behind him, I rushed back to Isiah quick, tilted his chin up to me gently, and placed the softest kiss on his lips. “I love you,” I whispered to him with a smile.

Isiah’s face got a bit red at the sudden expression of affection, but he whispered back, “I-I love you, too.”

“Now that’s what I like to hear,” I replied, sending him a wink before rushing back out to Carson. He had just removed another bag of frozen peas from the freezer and was making his way out of the kitchen.

“Carson,” I spoke a bit lower, catching up with him near the entrance to the kitchen. “Are… are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Carson nodded quickly. “Yeah, I just-” he paused for a moment… before he reached over, set the peas down on the kitchen island, and pulled me into a strong, unexpected hug. He damn near knocked the wind out of me when my chest hit his.

And this was how I knew my dad was lying straight through his teeth whenever he said he was getting old and weak. The way he handled Carson said otherwise, putting him in a headlock whenever he saw fit because he was probably one of the few people who was tall enough to.

“I love you,” Carson whispered to me. “Like I love you so much, and I know I can’t be what your dad is for you. I got that tonight, trust me, that shit hit me like a ton of bricks … but I’m hoping I’m doing better. I’m starting to realize why some people should never ever ever fucking have kids, holy fucking fuck , and like, just- thanks for being like the best son fucking ever.”

“Yeah,” I chuckled, wrapping my arms tight around this big guy, “always good to know the swear jar didn’t stand a chance in this household.”

That got the deepest chuckle out of Carson as he held me tighter.

“But you’re the best second dad a guy could ever ask for. I mean, I do own a horse thanks to you, you know.” I reminded him, making Carson laugh again.

Hell, we had a whole other life in Texas and New Jersey thanks to Carson.

“And I might even own a Ferrari in the near future?” I asked questioningly, sneaking that one in there, which Carson fully laughed at. I just had to.

“But I take it you’ve learned a bit more about my dad’s old man,” I continued more seriously once his laughter died down. “And that’s okay. He’d never burden me with that, so one of us has gotta be there for him, right?” Carson nodded into me. “But it’s alright to have big feelings, comrade. Isn’t it you that told me that? It’s not unbecoming of you to feel, and you once told me that, too. I think my Pops likes you cause you do. Keeps him grounded and all that other lovey dovey shit.”

I felt Carson pull away slowly as he released an arm so he could raise his hand to mess up my hair a little.

“Thank you. I needed that, kiddo. I seriously fucking needed that.”

“I love you, too, Carson. And I needed you when you came into my dad’s life, not just him…” I replied. “I can’t imagine a life where I’m forced to eat veggie lovers pizza. My alternative world without you is a scary, scary place.”

Both Carson and I chuckled as he let go fully to grab the peas from the counter. “No. You’re right. I advocate when I can. And I should probably get back to that father of yours.” Carson then started heading towards the door while I began to head back into the corridor.

Before Carson could fully close the door, I yelled to him over my shoulder, “Don’t forget that Isiah and I won that science fair project so you could marry him!”

And Isiah called out from my bedroom, adding, “We seriously did! Talked about it for like a month!”

Carson busted out laughing from the front doorway, replying with, “That Ferrari 458 is between you, the lord, and a devil named Don, Dylan! I’ve done all I can!”

Isiah and I made sure to boo my dad all the way out the door.

Then I made it back to my bedroom and got Isiah ready to lie down, ice his face, and watch some movies until we fell asleep.

How I became a damn counselor tonight still surprised me… yet it did feel good to be there for others.

And as I snuggled into bed with my boyfriend, keeping my phone near me if Carson or my old man called for any reason, I had a settling realization that seemed to relax me more tonight.

That I was learning to have a bandwidth for more.

I thought I’d be one horrible boyfriend to Isiah, considering I had never done this shit before- relationships- but I meant what I said to him.

That it’s alright to get it wrong the first time.

This might’ve started that mess of a night on the couch before my trip… but it developed way before them.

Eight years and counting, was it? Or maybe eight and some change?

Might have to take one out of Carson’s playbook and just run with a decade if we’re being honest. He buffed the numbers all the goddamn time anyway. And if his objective was to confuse, confuse, confuse until we’ve all forgotten how many years it’s been and he pulls a 1984 where 2+2=5… then it was working.

I think the only man he hadn’t fully fooled was my father. And we all know that would never happen. It was always about the details with him… which is why Christmas was and would always be my favourite holiday. He gave the best gifts.

And while he wasn’t the most perfect father in the entire world… Carson was, in fact, right… Not everyone deserved children.

But my old man?

Well, I can say with complete and total certainty that I had a father who cared enough to aim for it. Perfection . And he needed Carson and I to tell him when he hit the mark with the things he did for us. The sacrifices he made.

He had much better aim than he always thought he did. Perhaps, thought he could .

But if Isiah ever asks, I thought as I held this handsome lad against me tighter, snuggling further under the covers, I’m taking credit for all this growth.

I did my time.

Plus, Isiah wasn’t there for all the painful lectures with my ol’ Daddio; I mean that old man could go on , and on , and on , and on, holy fuck …

Fin

••

New Book Alert!

Alrighty y’all, chapter one is up! This new book will be a continuation of the same universe but can also be read as a standalone! The epilogue chapters for IASWAK will be posted once this new book’s story sort of lines up with those future chapters xoxo ••

Broken Hearts Café

“What am I to you, then?” I asked him. “A damn project?” “Nothing like that,” Mickey replied. “There’s a saying I wholeheartedly believe. That art is never completed, Ryk, it’s only abandoned.” I felt the air between us shift again. It had a tendency to do that when we were at odds. When I struggled to understand this thing between us. “And you should know something bout me by now. That I’m a bit of a completionist.” Mickey drew in closer, bringing our faces the closest they had probably ever been to each other. “I’ve never abandoned a damn fucking thing in my life.”

Nineteen-year-old Ryker had finally done it for better or worse. Broken away from his abusive father. Taking a job at Wilmoria’s Café, he hoped for a quiet new beginning- somewhere he could rebuild his life, focus on trying to graduate high school, and rediscover a sense of safety. But his plan for solitude is quickly upended when he meets Mickey- Micah Jackson- a warm yet complex 22-year-old baker and recent college grad who’s been at the café for years.

As Ryker learns the rhythms of his new life-the smell of vanilla treats, fresh bread, and coffee beans; the hum of the espresso machine and the soft laughter of coworkers… Mickey becomes his unexpected constant. What begins as mutual hatred between them both slowly deepens into something Ryker never thought he could have: trust, affection, and love. But healing isn’t simple. Between confronting his past, his mistakes, and learning to open his heart, Ryker must decide whether he can truly believe in a future where he’s safe, seen, and genuinely loved for who he is, all while he discovers who exactly he is. Perhaps who he wants to be.

“Broken Hearts Café” is a tender story about rebuilding after trauma, finding family in unexpected places- a café, a biker club- as well as the courage it takes to love again after getting it so utterly wrong the first time.

[MATURE 18+] Spin-off to It All Started With A Kiss (this book can be read as a standalone)