A/N︱Warnings

Ftr:

Welcome, or hello again! English is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes I may have made!

This is part 2 of the

Shadow

Series

. If you read this story first, you’ll get spoiled about

Shadows of Obsession

.

However, this is about different characters. So you don’t have to read the first story in order to understand this one.

Reading order:

1. Shadows of Obsession

2. Shadows of Submission

3. Shadows of Temptation

4. Shadows of Devotion

If you don’t like shy, innocent, nerdy, submissive men…well, that’s the MMC of this story.

If you’re not a fan of it, don’t even start reading! This won’t be your cup of coffee .

There’s also mother-daughter verbal abuse in this story. Take it as a trigger warning, please !!!

Without further ado, enjoy

<3

•

CHARACTER’S AESTHETIC

•

•

•

•

Chapter 1︱back

Coming back to college after everything that happened between him and me felt unreal. I never imagined something so absurd could happen to me. I had always been cautious. I never let anyone get under my skin.

He was my nightmare. A constant reminder of my biggest humiliation.

I wanted to avoid him at all costs, but how could I?

Every time I looked at him from across the campus, I relived the night it all went upside down.

The night I let myself feel .

• • •

I didn’t need to set a phone alarm. My roommate Jade was one. She always woke up early to do her makeup and straighten her raven hair.

I couldn’t scold her. She could draw her eyeliner sharper than a blade. It suited her with her bangs.

She always waited for me until I got ready, even for an hour. She has the patience of a saint; I have to give her that.

“Move your pretty ass, Freya. We only have five minutes to get to class.” Jade said, going back and forth in our dorm bedroom.

“You think my ass is pretty?” I smirked, comparing which set of earrings was better for my outfit.

She sighed. “That’s besides the point. Hurry!”

I held up my hands. “Alrighty, boss. Don’t shout. I’m coming.”

I chose the silver set that I could finally put on since the holes in my ears had finally healed.

I dressed in flared, light beige pants and an off-shoulder, tight white top. I let my curls fall over my shoulders and grabbed my bag with my laptop.

Nobody in our friend group had a bigger mess in their bag than I did.

We hurried to the lecture hall as if our lives depended on it. I was smiling, and Jade was frowning. She hated to be late anywhere.

When we got inside, I was breathing heavily, looking up at the seats to find my other two best friends. My eyes roamed through the rows of students until they stopped at the blond girl, who was waving at me.

“I found them,” I said, and we ascended the stairs.

“Were you shitting so long, or what?” Emery asked, her green eyes narrowed at me.

I sat down beside her, pulling out my laptop. “No, bitch. Picking up the right earrings was way more important.”

“Yeah, like anybody cared. Half of the people here come here looking homeless.” Jade chimed in, taking a seat beside Aurellia.

Aury laughed, hiding her smile behind her hand.

“Says the girl who wakes up early to do her makeup,” I murmured, and felt Jade’s piercing gray-blue eyes on me.

“When will you two stop fighting?” Aury asked, looking at me.

I lifted my chin upward. “Probably never. She’s too punctual, and I’m not. That’s the main problem in our friendship.”

“Or you could wake up a bit earlier, and the problem is solved,” Emery suggested, and my brow arched.

“No, thank you. I need my beauty sleep. How do you think I achieved this pretty face?” I smirked, and we laughed, even Jade.

The professor entered the lecture hall, and all the students who hadn’t opened their laptops did so.

I propped my chin on my fist as the professor started to talk, and my eyes dropped for some reason to the second row under us.

My heart immediately clenched.

It was a fleeting look. Just for a split second, but his eyes were on me.

Just as fast as he looked at me, he turned his head back to the professor, adjusting his eyeglasses as if there was something wrong with them.

My heartbeat was in my throat, and my body went still.

“How’s Jace adjusting?” Aury asked Emery.

I swallowed quickly, looking at my laptop.

“Surprisingly good. You know how he is. He doesn’t talk much, but he told me I don’t need to worry about him. But you know, he’s my cousin. I have to worry.” Emery replied, looking at him.

“We could take him out. To a club, so he could get more social.” Aury said, twisting her chocolate-wavy strand around her finger.

Emery shook her head. “Jace doesn’t like crowds of people who are rubbing themselves against each other.”

I cleared my throat, trying to focus on the presentation ahead of me, but all I could do was keep glancing at him. At Jace. At his cold blond hair with dark roots that was brushing his shoulders, and at those cute silver-framed glasses sitting at the bridge of his narrowed nose.

To most, he looked like a nerd who was only interested in his books and games.

But to me, he was more than that.

“What do you think, Freya?”

Emery’s voice tore me from my thoughts.

“What?” I asked, staring at them.

Emery frowned. “You weren’t listening, were you?”

I smiled. “I’m not like you. I pay attention in class.”

Jade huffed, shaking her head.

“Sure you do,” Emery said. “Anyway, we decided to go for a picnic and bring Jace with us. What do you say?” She stared at me with those hazel eyes, the same eyes Jace had.

I forced a smile. “Yeah, sounds good.” I choked out somehow.

“Deal.” She smiled back and focused on the professor, who kept ranting.

I felt a chill course through me, and there wasn’t even a breeze inside. Just the thought of spending time with Jace after what had happened between us was worse than being tortured.

I didn’t want to go for a cute picnic with him. I didn’t want to sit close to him, and I definitely didn’t want him to look at me.

But I couldn’t just say I wouldn’t go. Emery would ask questions, and the more questions she’d ask, the more nervous I’d get, and she’d know I was hiding something. She was always good at reading people.

And I didn’t want her to know what happened between her cousin and me. It was pointless to tell her, anyway.

Jace hated me because of what happened before the summer break.

And I hated myself for letting it happen.

When the class ended, students slowly descended the stairs, and I followed with them.

“Running away?” Aury said, hooking her arm with mine.

I looked behind my shoulder. Jace was nowhere near me.

“No? What would I be running from?” I laughed, but it was a fake laugh.

We exited the lecture hall and walked across the lobby.

“I know you don’t want to talk about what happened back then, but pretending nothing happened between you two is wild. It’s written all across your face that something is wrong, and Emery will notice it soon, too.”

“She won’t. And nothing will ever again happen between us. It was a mistake. We were drunk and not in our right senses.” I said, turning toward the coffee vending machine and selecting a black coffee.

I hated it more than anything in my life, but I wasn’t feeling anything sweet.

“Want something?” I asked Aury.

She shook her head.

“How do you know what Jace thinks, though? I know he doesn’t talk a lot, but maybe-”

I held up my hand in front of her face. “Please. I don’t want to talk about it. I have a date tonight, and I don’t want to hear a thing about Jace.”

The coffee vending machine beeped, and I took out the disgusting coffee.

“But will you come to the picnic?” She wondered, and I took a sip of the coffee. Eww.

“Yeah, I will. Emery would find it weird if I didn’t come.” I replied.

Aury stared at me, her dark brown eyes reminding me of cocoa.

“Stop looking at me this way. It’s fucking scary.” I whispered.

She rolled her eyes. “We’re meeting up at six. Don’t be late this time.”

I nodded. “Yes, boss. I won’t disappoint you.”

Aury waved at me and turned on her heel to her next class.

I finished the coffee at one go. The bitter taste of it made me almost gag.

I threw the empty cup into the trash and strode to my next lesson. I almost bumped into five people on my way there.

I tried to come up with an excuse not to go to the picnic, but nothing was good enough. If I knew of this plan beforehand, I’d just say I had a dance class, but they all knew I had nothing after school.

I stopped in my tracks, turned to the wall, and pressed my forehead against it. People were staring, but I didn’t care at all.

Their opinion of me was something I never gave a fuck about.

You should try out new things because when you get to seventy, you will barely be able to walk, and you will regret that you didn’t live your life to the fullest. That you were too afraid of what people would say.

Fuck everybody, honestly.

And fuck my heart for being attracted to someone who hates me.

⸻⸻

Hey! I’m back, and I can’t wait for you to read more.

This has a very different vibe than the first story, so be prepared :)

Check out my playlist on

Spotify

. Link in bio <3

Chapter 2︱angel

I was standing in front of my closet, staring at all the clothes I owned. It was quite warm outside, so I considered wearing a skirt.

But at the same time, some nice pants would look great as well.

“What are you staring at?” Jade asked. She was already changed into a pair of wide denim shorts and an oversized black T-shirt.

“I’m picking an outfit for the picnic, of course,” I replied, grabbing a white skirt.

“It’s only a picnic, and it will only be us as usual. Well, except for Jace.” She said and took my hairbrush.

And that’s the problem, my dear friend.

“I know, but what if I meet someone hot by chance? A girl has to be ready.” I smiled and decided to wear the skirt and lilac tank top with tiny straps.

I kept my hair down and sprayed my favorite cherry perfume on myself.

We were supposed to hang out on campus. There was a huge park with many paths we always visited, where we’d go for walks to clear our heads.

Aury, Emery, and Jace were already there. I brought chips I had hidden from Jade, and she got a cake from the bakery near our college.

We entered the park that was filled with all the students, either walking or cycling. Talking or texting.

“Here!” Emery yelled, waving at us. They were already sitting on a blanket but didn’t open any of the snacks.

I took a deep breath and looked at Jace. He was leaning against his palms, observing people, totally uninterested in us.

“I can’t believe you’re actually on time,” Aury noted, smirking.

Jade sat down next to Emery, and I had no other free spot but next to Jace.

Fucking. Hell.

I stood there, smiling, not knowing what to do next. It was already hard to hang out with him, let alone sit so close to him.

Jace was wearing black slacks, a gray T-shirt, and Converse.

“Do you need an invitation? Sit down.” Emery said, pulling me onto the blanket.

I crashed down, right next to Jace, who seemed to turn his head in the opposite direction from me.

Wow. Nice.

“You even got wine!” Jade exclaimed. One thing that made her happier than black clothes was red wine.

“But let’s not get drunk. We should save it for parties.” Emery whispered with a smile.

They opened the wine and got the glasses. As they poured it, I couldn’t wait to drink it all.

My heart was beating unusually fast. I never got nervous.

But everything had changed.

“Here. Give it to Jace. He needs to get more relaxed.” Emery looked at me, holding the glass of wine.

I reluctantly took it from her hand and glanced at Jace from the corner of my eye.

He was no longer looking away but at his shoes.

Don’t be a pussy. He’s just a shy guy. I’m not afraid of him.

“Umm, here,” I said a bit louder than I intended, but it caught his attention.

He snapped his head up, holding my gaze far longer than he ever had before. Color bloomed across his cheeks as he stared at me like I’d just told him to strip.

I quickly looked away, fixing my eyes on a random tree, my grip on the glass loosening.

“Jace, Freya doesn’t bite. Just take the wine.” Emery laughed.

I was breathing hard, my chest rising too fast to calm as I felt his eyes on me, as if he was looking at my naked body.

And the most ridiculous thing was, I never got shy naked.

Jace’s trembling fingers grazed my skin as he took the wine glass from my grip.

I tugged my arm to my body, feeling the prints of his warm fingers against my skin.

What is happening to me?

I folded my arms under my chest, meeting Aury’s eyes accidentally. She was straight-up eye-siding me.

I raised my eyebrows at her.

Her eyes narrowed for a couple of seconds before she sighed and turned with a smile to Jace.

“Do you like the wine? I picked it out. I heard you’re into sweet drinks like me, and this one’s my favorite,” Aury said, taking a sip.

Jace took a sip, too, and faintly smiled.

Fuck, he looks like an angel, and it’s scary.

Only the Halo is missing.

“It’s pretty good.” He replied, not meeting anyone’s eyes.

“See? I told you he would like my wine. I always pick the best.” Aury laughed.

“Yeah, but I pick the best desserts,” Jade said, already eating the cake she bought.

Emery gasped. “I can’t believe you started eating without us, you greedy one!”

Jade flipped her off and took another bite.

“You’re such a bitch, honestly.” I snatched her cake and finished it.

She gasped. “I’ll kill you for this,” Jade whispered eerily and jumped at me.

I laughed as I tickled her. Only she and Aury were ticklish in our friend group.

I wonder if Jace is.

Jade started to laugh like a pig and rolled onto her back. I immediately straddled her, tickling her stomach.

“Stop! Please, stop!” She almost couldn’t breathe.

“Say pretty please, Jade. Beg me.”

She tried to fight me back, but it was pointless.

“Pretty pleaseeee.” She exclaimed, tears running down her face.

I stopped tickling her, and she took a deep breath.

“Who wants to be next?” I asked with a smile.

Emery shook her head, eating the chips, and Aury was pouring another glass of wine for herself.

I sighed. “You’re no fun.”

Aury raised her eyebrows and slowly turned to Jace. I swear I wanted to scream like the hopeless girl in a horror movie.

No, she wouldn’t-

“Jace.” She started, and he looked at her.

Aury glanced at me with a smirk and back at him. “Do you want another glass?”

“No, thank you. This was enough.” He replied shyly and set the empty glass on the blanket.

I let out the breath that had almost suffocated me.

For a moment, I thought Aury would say something horrendous, and I’d strangle her in her sleep.

She was so damn lucky she kept her mouth shut.

We continued to eat and drink all the things we brought for the picnic. Jace said maybe five sentences during our talk, but it was more than we all hoped for.

Every time I looked away, I felt his eyes on me. I just knew he was judging and hating me for what had happened when we got drunk back before summer break.

If I had known he was coming as well, I’d have rather stayed in the dorm alone, bored to death.

I blame Emery for it. She invited us to their villa. She could’ve said Jace was coming, too.

• • •

The evening came, and half of the students vanished into their dorms. We packed the empty plates and plastic bags with the eaten snacks.

Aury folded the blanket, and Jade grabbed the empty bottle of wine.

“We are worse than pigs. We literally finished everything.” Emery said as we walked out of the park.

“I don’t know about you, but I’d love some French fries right now.” Aury touched her stomach.

I shook my head. I was as full as I could be.

Despite how badly I’d expected the picnic to go, it actually didn’t-aside from a few instances.

Aury and I were walking ahead of the others, enjoying the evening walk back to the dorm. I couldn’t wait to jump into my bed. It wasn’t comfortable at all, but I was tired as hell.

“When are you starting dance classes again?” Aury asked me after minutes of silence.

“This week. I don’t know the exact day yet, but I’m so excited. It’s been torture not to dance with my girls. I missed them.” I answered.

She sighed. “I wish I had a talent for heels dancing.”

“You’re all welcome to join us anytime. We’re dancing for fun, not professionally.”

She pushed me on my shoulder. “Thanks, Freya.”

When we got into the dormitory building, Jace said goodbye to us very quietly and headed in the opposite direction.

All the tension in my body finally vanished.

Jade got inside our room, and so did Emery to theirs. As I was about to enter our room, Aury touched my arm.

“I talked to Emery. I asked her if Jace wanted to come willingly today, and she said he only asked about one thing.” She paused. “If all of us were coming.” She winked at me and hurried after Emery into their room, shutting the door gently.

I stood in the hall like a child who had lost its parents in a big store, with my heart beating quickly against my chest.

⸻⸻

Chapter 3︱before summer break

FLASHBACK

Aury invited us to drink during the weekend, and who was I to refuse? I loved partying and drinking.

That was the only thing that could help me get through college in one piece.

I packed so many outfits, and I don’t even know what for because we were invited to Aury’s boyfriend’s villa, which was situated in the woods.

It wasn’t only his villa-it was Emery’s too. Ricky, Aury’s boyfriend, was her older brother.

His only good quality was that he was hot as fuck; otherwise, he was a total psycho who had kidnapped Aury more than once.

He was usually rude to me, less so to Jade, but it was not like I cared. Men’s opinions of me meant less than a dog’s shit.

Everyone has their own kinks, and it seemed Aury had the most intense one since she chose to be with him.

But if he made her cry only once, he would lose his French baguette between his legs with a hammer.

I’m very skilled with hammers thanks to my dad.

When we all finished packing our suitcases, we hurried to the parking lot. Ricky was waiting for us there with his black BMW.

It was strange that someone as selfish as he was gave us a ride.

The ride there took us an hour and a half. The path there was narrow, surrounded by pine trees.

I didn’t care much for nature, but I had to admit they’d chosen a great location for this villa.

When the villa came into view, my stomach coiled. It almost felt like a sign that something horrible would happen.

The villa was modern, with light yellow wood mixed with black paint. Huge glass walls were almost everywhere, letting you see straight inside. It was kind of creepy.

Imagine going for a glass of water at night and seeing something staring at you.

I would never survive it. An ambulance would be needed to bring me back to life.

Ricky parked the car in the back, and I eyed the huge pool that was situated on the porch. This villa was so perfect. I envied rich people.

Emery Mayer was one lucky girl.

We took our suitcases out of the trunk and dragged them inside the house. Emery opened the front door and let us all walk in first.

I let out a sigh when we got into the spacious living room, with a white leather sectional couch in the shape of a U.

I left the suitcase in the middle of the living room and leaned against the pool table.

Ricky came in last and moved beside Aury when, suddenly, a car pulled into the driveway.

“Is it your mother, Emery?” I asked. She brought us here before. It was a girls’ trip, but in reality, it was an interrogation.

A lot had happened back then.

“Of course not. She doesn’t know we’re here,” Emery replied.

Aury cleared her throat. “It’s Kaiden. I invited him.”

Kaiden always had a huge crush on Jade, and vice versa. But she always put him in a friend-zone for some reason.

In my opinion, he was a nice guy. But no one was ever good enough for one of my best friends. They only deserved the best.

Jade’s eyes instantly went wide.

“The more the better,” Aury added with a smile, but Ricky looked extremely annoyed.

That look on his face makes me very happy.

I was smiling hard until Emery opened her mouth.

“I guess I should tell you something as well.” Emery chimed in. “Jace should be here any minute, too.”

I instantly froze.

Since the day I first met him at the gala event Emery’s mother, Caroline, invited us to, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Even when I was hooking up with others.

He was always in the back of my mind. His cute smile. His red cheeks when he got shy and his hazel eyes.

Since that gala event, I met him once more. The second time was when Emery and Aury were showing him the school.

We met on the campus, and I was wearing a very revealing summer dress. I never in my life wanted to change into a bag of potatoes.

When he glanced at me, he got ten shades redder in his face.

I always made men weak for me. And every single time, I didn’t care for it. Not until now.

When I finally got out of the frozen state, the front door shut, and Kaiden and Jace walked inside the living room.

Jace’s gaze immediately found me, and his eyes widened.

While Jade and Kaiden were awkwardly greeting each other, I only heard the sound of my pulsing heart.

Jace gulped and turned to Emery. “Maybe I should leave,” he whispered.

“Don’t even think about it.” Emery protested. “We should get to know each other better. Soon, we’ll meet up more often.”

Jace looked at the floor, and I stared at him. He was dressed in plain blue jeans, with a white T-shirt and gray flannel.

I gripped the edge of the pool table tighter as I realized my evening was ruined.

We all moved to the couch then. Aury was next to her boyfriend. Kaiden to Jade, and Jace and I were standing idly like fools.

“Come here. There’s enough space.” Aury suddenly said, and I couldn’t thank her enough in my head.

I sat beside her, my heart hammering against my ribs.

Why am I so nervous? It’s even worse than writing an exam.

Emery returned from the kitchen as she went to grab the drinks. She settled them on the marble coffee table.

I snatched whatever was closest to me and took a huge sip.

No, I’ll enjoy this. No one will ruin tonight for me.

“I know what we should play,” I announced with a forced smile.

“Please, no. Let’s just not.” Jade argued.

“What are we? Fifteen?” Ricky taunted.

Emery rolled her eyes. “Stop bitching. It will be fun.”

“I agree. Nothing bad can happen.” Aury said, and we smirked at the same time.

“I disagree.” Jade chimed in. “In movies, always something bad happens when they play truth or dare.”

That’s exactly what I don’t need.

Emery hurried for an empty bottle of beer, and when she came back, Aury was the one who wanted to go first; however, Ricky grabbed the bottle before her.

I rolled my eyes.

While she answered for the truth that she picked, I looked at Jace. I couldn’t understand what was so different about him from all the other guys.

He wasn’t anything special. Just not a very social guy, who had blond hair and wore eyeglasses.

I focused on the game, and it seemed that whatever Ricky asked Aury made her go stoic because he was the one to spin the bottle again, and it pointed at me.

Emery laughed, and I rolled my eyes once again.

Before he could ask me the question, I burst out, “I’m choosing dare.”

I was always choosing dares. Truths were either boring or too exposing.

Ricky grinned at me like the psychopath that he was, and I knew in that moment, I was done for.

He saw through me.

“I dare you to sit on Jace’s lap for the next four rounds. If you refuse, then you have to drink the whole bottle of vodka.”

I immediately looked at Jace, and of course, he looked like I had slapped him.

“Don’t tell me, you’re refusing.” Ricky teased.

I shot him a death glare. My best one. “Never.”

I wouldn’t let myself be laughed at by him just because I couldn’t accomplish a simple dare.

I did so much worse than that.

I shot up from the couch and crossed the space to Jace. “Will you mind?” I asked, my voice steady.

He didn’t even look at me. Ouch.

“It’s just a stupid game, Jace. Don’t let her lose.” Emery said playfully.

I took a deep breath and sat down on his lap. He got startled but didn’t shove me to the ground.

I finished my drink and grabbed another.

I always did this to men. Sitting on them, kissing them, fucking them. They were never anything serious, and neither was I to them.

We exchanged ourselves with each other for a couple of hours, and it was nice. But I never felt fulfilled. It was like something was missing.

Despite Jace being slim, he held me for the whole time we were playing the game as if he were afraid he’d drop me.

He never touched me. His hands stayed by his sides or on his drink. He drank a lot, and I could tell it had something to do with me-sitting on his lap, pressing against him.

I wasn’t heavy, but not thin. I had a nice figure and legs since I was dancing a lot.

I wiggled as my ass got stiff from all the sitting, and something hard poked me.

For a second, I thought I had left my keys in my jeans, but that wasn’t it because I didn’t feel anything before.

I moved again, and Jace froze, all tensed.

No. Fucking. Way.

I chugged the rest of the drink, and the feeling of lightness began to take over me. The more I drank, the lighter I felt.

Before I was aware of it, Aury and her boyfriend disappeared, and Kaiden and Jade were somewhere else, too.

Emery was talking to a guy I’ve never seen before, or I did, and I was just too drunk to recognize him.

I was lying on the couch, and Jace wasn’t there.

The music was blasting, almost cracking my skull open.

I grabbed whoever’s drink it was and finished it before I got up, stumbling across the room, looking for the bathroom.

I was too wasted to recall where it was.

I stumbled to the last door in the hall and opened it. I almost crashed onto the floor if it wasn’t for a pair of soft hands on my shoulders.

I slowly tilted my head and stared into those hazel eyes.

He immediately let go of me and took a step back.

I pressed my hands against the wall and took a step toward him. He was drunk, too, maybe even more than I was.

He lost his balance and fell on his ass. I began to cackle and then laugh like it was the funniest thing in the entire world.

“So hot. It’s so hot.” I slid the top off and then unzipped my jeans.

Jace was staring at me like a deer staring at headlights.

I shimmied the jeans down and kicked them further from me.

I stood there, half-naked in front of him. He was completely red, swinging from side to side.

I never wanted someone more in my life than him, right there. I didn’t even acknowledge that we were in a small closet.

“I felt it,” I whispered. “When I was sitting…on you. I felt it.” I smiled.

I staggered forward and halted in front of him. I beckoned with my finger for him to get closer.

He somehow got on his knees, trembling, his mouth partially opened.

I grabbed his head at the side and looked down at him. He was staring at me like a puppy. Like a golden retriever.

“Kiss me, Jace. I know you want to.” I murmured.

Jace looked at me like I was a goddess. Something magical and unreal.

No man ever looked at me this way.

He suddenly grabbed the back of my thighs and pressed his mouth between my legs.

• • •

When the morning came and he sobered, Jace sprinted out of the closet like I was some sort of monster, like I was pointing a gun at him.

My pride was destroyed. I never felt more embarrassed in my life.

And it was only because I let myself feel. Because I wanted him to make me feel.

⸻⸻

Chapter 4︱beat

After classes, I headed back to my dorm to change into shorts and a random oversized T-shirt. I was finally having a dance class again.

Aury couldn’t live without music, and I, without dancing. It was the only thing that made me feel truly alive.

I stuffed my bag with water, snacks, and black dance heels.

Thankfully, I didn’t need a car because the dance studio was just a few streets away from college.

I could thank Jade and her obsession with books, because she was the reason I stumbled upon the studio in the first place.

She dragged me with her to the bookstore, even though she knew I was not much of a reader. She begged me to go with her, and I couldn’t refuse her when she looked so cute. It was the first time in our friendship that she begged me for anything.

She pointed to every book she read and told me which ones were trash and which ones were worth reading.

While she debated between two books to buy for fifteen minutes, I stepped outside for some fresh air.

I stood in front of the bookstore and imagined how much cooler I would look with a cigarette between my lips. It was awkward to stand alone while waiting for your friend. People gave me weird looks.

Bored, I watched multiple girls, dressed in high heels, enter the building across from the bookstore. They were all laughing and smiling. It reminded me of my friends when we hung out together. I couldn’t imagine my life without them.

I looked up at the pink neon sign on the building that turned on: HEELS AND FEELS DANCING STUDIO.

I liked dancing when I was younger, but my mother never allowed me to participate in a dance class.

There was nothing that my mother liked about me in general. I looked like her, with my brown curly hair and honey brown eyes, but to her, I was ugly. A reminder of my father that she divorced. The funniest thing was, I didn’t look like him one bit.

She couldn’t hate herself, so she hated me instead.

Jade left that day with two books instead of one, and the dance studio stuck in my mind for the entire night.

The next day, I confidently went in there and told them I’d like to join them. They all welcomed me with a warm smile.

I entered the dance studio, and music was already blasting, echoing through the walls. Buttons by the Pussycat Dolls was always on our playlist.

I dropped my bag on the floor and watched the girls dance, their bodies moving sharply with each beat of the song. You could see the passion in their eyes. They were completely lost in the music, no longer in control of their bodies.

I smiled, staring at them. They were such great dancers. I admired them.

When the music ended, I started clapping. “You were all hot as fuck.”

“Freya!” All of them exclaimed simultaneously.

Dahlia came running to me, hugging me so tightly that I almost couldn’t breathe.

“Wow, your hair! When did you get it done?” I asked, and she drew away. She usually kept her black hair curly, but the cornrow braids looked heavenly on her.

“A few days ago. I’m so happy you’re back. I can’t wait to dance together after such a long time,” she said, smiling with her perfectly white teeth.

“You mean messing up the choreo?” Yumei laughed and tapped me on the shoulder. She didn’t change in any way. Her tongue was as sharp as mine.

“Shut up. That only happened once.” I rolled my eyes.

She sat down on the floor and ran her fingers through her short, Oreo-colored hair, styled to one side, with bangs. Her monolid eyes were traced with long, thin eyeliner. Over the vacation, she’d gotten a few more piercings, but the septum caught my attention the most.

“I missed this place and all of you. Dancing at home wasn’t the same as with you,” I said, stretching my body.

Leah was skipping through the songs, trying to find something good. “Of course not.”

I smiled and stretched my legs out fully. When I was done, I helped Leah pick the next song. She was taking forever to decide.

Once the music started to play, all the girls looked at me.

“Don’t tell me you forgot the moves, ladies. Let’s go!” I yelled, and they all came running to their positions.

No one could stop you when Destiny’s Child’s song, Lose My Breath , was on.

Dahlia, who was next to me, was grinning with her hand on her hip. I turned to Yumei, and she raised her eyebrows at me.

No one could forget this choreo. I’d remember it even if I were lying on my deathbed.

• • •

I left the studio in heels, singing to myself since the street was empty.

The street lamps were on, and the weather was nice. There was not a single cloud. The sun was already setting, painting the sky like flames.

Dancing put me in a better mood. I forgot all my problems and thought life was getting better.

The second I reached campus and saw that platinum-blond hair from afar, my pretty world was shattered into pieces.

Emery was there as well, and I knew once she’d seen me, it would be over. I turned to the opposite direction and hurried towards the dorms.

Just as I was about to open the door, Jade exited the building.

“Oh, you’re back. How was dancing?” She asked, drinking an energy drink.

“Amazing. I had fun.” I glanced over my shoulder and back at her. “Where are you going?”

She took a long sip, holding eye contact. “Meet up with Jace and Emery. Come, too.”

I waved her off. “I’m a bit sweaty. I’m going to take a shower, but you go and have fun with them.”

“Where do you think you’re going?”

My smile fell.

I slowly spun, meeting Emery’s judging eyes. What was worse was Jace’s eyes on my body.

He kept stealing glances at my thighs, pretending to focus on the building or the people around us, yet his gaze always found its way back to my legs.

The shorts I was wearing barely covered my ass, and the top wasn’t helping at all. I had curves and a bigger butt. I got it from my father, actually.

“I was about to go to my room,” I answered.

Emery wiggled her finger at me. “Forget about that. We’re going to get dinner from the food truck.”

I took a deep breath and finally looked at Jace. He was dressed so casually. Sweatpants and a hoodie.

“Don’t make me angry. You’re coming.” Emery hooked her arm with mine and dragged me away.

I wanted to run, but her clutch was stronger than I thought.

We ordered burgers, and I didn’t even know what was in them. I was too aware of the fact that Jace’s hoodie was grazing my arm the whole time.

“I need a coffee. Jade, come with me.” Emery said, and since I was too lost in my thoughts, I noticed way too late that they were gone, on the opposite side of the campus.

They went into the small coffee shop where Aury worked.

I took a step aside from Jace and folded my arms. He was like an Eiffel Tower to me. You couldn’t ignore or stop looking at him.

“What’s your name, handsome?” A girl stopped by Jace. She wasn’t any special looking.

She ordered a burger and was smiling at him like a doll. A pretty creepy doll from the Conjuring movies.

“You forgot how to speak?” She laughed, and I could tell by Jace’s tensed shoulders that he wasn’t happy she was talking to him. He was turning his whole body away from her.

“There are so many parties right now. Come with me to have fun. We could get a room later.” She said and drew closer to Jace, reaching her hand to his face.

I didn’t think before I moved. It just happened. Like a reflex.

I slapped her hand so harshly that my palm stung. “Are you blind or what? Can’t you see he isn’t interested in your cheap-ass panties? Try to touch him, and I’ll stretch them over your stupid head.”

She looked flabbergasted and, with shame, ran in the opposite direction.

“Fucking bitch.” I mumbled, shaking my head.

She thought Jace was easy to catch.

The warmth of Jace’s body was a reminder of how close I was to him. I stepped back and swept my hair over my shoulder, trying to cool off.

“Next time, speak up. Don’t let people take advantage of you.” I said and grabbed our burgers.

Jace was staring at me again, his hazel eyes so big.

I fluttered my eyelashes, completely confused by the fact that a mere look of his made me nervous.

I quickly turned to the small round table and put all those burgers down. At the same time, Jade and Emery returned with the coffee.

“I can’t wait to eat,” Jade said, taking a big bite.

I smiled and took a bite, too. The burgers here were always the best.

“Freya, do you have a date for tonight?” Emery asked, and Jace, who was mid-bite of the burger, halted.

I set the food down. “Why are you asking? Want to tag along? I could arrange a double date.”

She rolled her eyes. “No, thank you. I have my eyes set on someone.”

Jace was observing the inside of his burger, pretending he didn’t care about our conversation.

“Then why are you asking? Do you not want me to go?” I asked, and Jace raised his eyes at me.

I looked away.

“I want to have a movie night. All of us. Even Jace.” Emery smiled.

My heart skipped a beat.

“But men are not allowed in girls’ rooms.” I pointed out.

“Who said anything about our rooms? We can go to the cinema.”

Jace’s gaze was sharper than a dagger or a laser. If he could, he’d burn a hole in my head.

“I can’t tonight. I already promised myself to Luke.” I said, and grabbed my burger. “I have to get ready. It’s too late.”

“Ugh, okay. But you’re coming next time.” Emery pointed her finger at me.

I nodded and slowly distanced myself from them. Even when I was halfway across the campus, I felt his gaze on me.

⸻⸻

Chapter 5︱library

I didn’t fuck Luke.

And that was the first time in years I went on a date without sleeping with someone.

He was tall and ginger with a grin, but when he was touching me, I wanted to throw acid on him.

I imagined it and smiled during our date. I thought I was turning into a serial killer for a moment.

That’s when I knew I had to get out, to run away. So I told him I found out my childhood dog had died, and that I had to mourn him in my dorm with my friends. I even shed a few tears.

I didn’t rush back to campus. Most of the time, I hated returning there, so I was stalling.

Jade was thankfully sleeping, so I wasn’t interrogated.

I never came back after a night with a guy. I stayed with him until the morning.

After I got rid of the makeup, I changed into Hello Kitty pajamas (don’t judge me) and slipped into bed.

I stared into the darkness, thinking about what was wrong with me.

I couldn’t fall asleep at all. Luke and Jace kept swirling in my thoughts. They were completely different-Luke was my type, yet all I could think about was Jace. The way he kissed me down there before the summer break.

I craved his mouth between my legs, even though he hated me, and I couldn’t stand him.

I turned to my side and scrolled through social media. Then I looked up Emery’s account.

I scrolled through her followers, looking for an account that began with J and ended with V.

I scrolled through five hundred profiles but still couldn’t find anyone named Jace Vaughn.

Maybe he used a nickname or something made up. Not everyone is using their full government name on social media.

I sighed quietly in frustration and turned my phone off. I fell asleep thinking about his smile. Only that could calm me down and make me nervous at the same time.

That fucking cute and beautiful smile.

• • •

“Professor Harrison wants to destroy us completely with this exam. What do you mean we have to learn all this?” Aury exclaimed, pointing at the stacks of school material on her desk.

Jade and I came to crash in their room after lectures.

Jade stared at the pile with a death glare. “Maybe mixing something in his black coffee wouldn’t be such a bad idea.”

We all looked at her in unison with furrowed brows.

She noticed our silence after a couple of seconds. “I don’t want to kill him. Just make him spend his nice noon on the toilet.”

I exhaled with relief.

“That still won’t help us because he’ll come to work the next day, and in a terrible mood.” Emery chimed in, lying on the bed like a dead person.

“Yeah, I agree. But it’s all our fault. We don’t take college seriously enough.”

Six pairs of eyes snapped at me.

I threw my arms in the air. “What? I know the truth is hard to swallow.”

“Speaking from experience?” Aury asked with a smirk.

My eyes narrowed, and when I was about to curse her out, Jade said something that made me want to punch my fist through a wall.

“What about Jace? He could help us study. He’s the smartest person we know.”

Someone must be praying for my downfall. Maybe it’s Luke because he didn’t believe that my dog had died.

“Oh my god, yes! I’m going to call him right now.” Emery exclaimed, sat up quickly, and dialed Jace.

“Jace and I talk a lot. Especially about games. I even suggested playing together, and he agreed.” Jade randomly confessed, and my eyes grew wide.

“What? I thought he wasn’t talkative.” I said, bewildered.

Jade shrugged. “If you respect his space, he will talk.”

Oh, so that’s why he hates me. No wonder.

“He said he will help us!” Emery blurted out.

Welp.

“Let’s go. We have a rough day ahead of us.” Aury announced and opened the door. Jade walked out first, then Emery, and when it was my turn, I was still stoic in the middle of the room. Aury sighed and pushed me forward.

“Do I have to come, too?” I asked in a whisper when she grabbed the school material and shut the door.

She turned to me. “Yes, because I know you know shit as well.”

I groaned and slapped my face. “Can I go to a grocery store first?”

We began to head down the hall, Jade and Emery in front of us.

“What do you want to buy?”

“A vodka.”

She halted and frowned at me. “No, you have to be sober to learn something.”

Wordlessly, we headed to the college’s enormous library. The space was washed in black and gray, sleek and modern, with a massive glass wall revealing the yard beyond.

We moved through one aisle of books and sat down at the gray oval table that was empty.

Students were roaming through the library, and the realization hit me hard. We were probably the only ones who didn’t consistently study.

We didn’t have the worst GPA. Just not the highest one.

“H-Hey.”

Jace appeared behind Emery, breathless with stacks of papers, books, and a laptop.

Wow, he came prepared.

“You didn’t have to run, Jace,” Emery said and made a space for him to sit.

“We’re thankful that you want to help us.” Aury smiled at him.

He got slightly flushed and ducked his head down. The navy blue sweatshirt he wore made his hair look so bright. It was…cute.

He opened the laptop, and when he stared at the screen, my heart pulsed quicker. There was something about nerdy guys that I’d never noticed before.

A certain charm.

“I simplified some notes for you, and I’ll try to explain the material-” his eyes caught mine, staring. He fluttered his eyelashes and gulped. “E-Explain it better.”

Jace’s gaze returned to the laptop, and he didn’t glance at me again.

He shouldn’t be looking at me at all. Not since he fled the morning after we made out.

It was the most Jace had talked since we first met. His notes and explanation were better than the professor’s. I wondered why we were even paying them to teach us when they sucked at it.

“Okay, I need a break. My back is stiff.” Emery yawned and stretched her arms in the air.

We were in the library for two hours.

“If we survive this exam, I’m throwing another party,” Emery added.

Jade shook her head. “Hopefully, the next one won’t be ruined by cops.”

Emery gave her a side glance. “Nothing will ruin my next party. Be sure of that.”

“Well then, I’m going to study very hard. I love your parties.” I smirked.

She wiggled her fingers at me with her nose scrunched up.

“By the way,” Aury cut in, and I looked at her. “I love the new photos you uploaded on Instagram.”

“What can I say? My beauty is incomparable.” The pictures were actually the only ones I really liked. I’m too picky with what I post on social media.

“You can thank me for that. I was the one who took them.” Emery rolled her eyes.

I laughed. “Thank you, Your Majesty.”

After that, we went back to studying. We stayed in the library until the evening. The more I learned, the more confused my head became, but I gathered some important information.

When all of us were completely drained to the point we couldn’t read a single letter, we decided it was time to go to bed. We grabbed something to eat from the cafeteria and headed to the dorms.

The girls stayed in the hall, talking, or more like trying to converse with Jace, but I was already on my way to my room.

I couldn’t handle his stare anymore. I didn’t know what his problem was, but I was already prepared to confront him if he did it again.

He didn’t know me at all. I could be a bitch.

⸻⸻

Chapter 6︱close

It seemed totally unbelievable, but we all managed to pass. Barely, but we did. And we could thank Jace for that.

Not that I’d thank him, but the girls surely would.

I wouldn’t thank someone who left me in the morning, as if I were the worst woman he had ever spent the night with.

I don’t think I’ll ever forget about that.

After classes, I headed back to the dance studio. I put on leggings and a white tank top, my hair in a high ponytail.

I needed to loosen up after the most stressful exam of my life, and the only thing that could make that happen was the dance floor, my high heels, and music.

Jade was sprawled on the bed, absorbed in a book thicker than any law textbook. She was so consumed by the story that she didn’t even react when I said goodbye.

It happened so frequently that I no longer batted an eye at it.

On my way across campus, many students greeted me. Let’s say I make a lot of friends when I’m drunk. It’s honestly nice to see so many people care enough to say hi.

Just as I reached the exit gate, I halted. Jace was coming down the path, his hands tucked into his jeans pockets.

I tipped my head back and drew in a slow, steady breath. Why is he everywhere I go?

I turned on my heel in the opposite direction because I knew of another exit, but I had to hurry.

As I rounded the street corner to my dance studio, all out of breath, already sweaty, Jace fell just a few steps ahead of me.

HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!

The blood in my veins was boiling. Was this just some sick joke of his? I was trying to avoid him at all costs.

No, I can’t be running away from him like some scared kid racing from the horror house.

I straightened my posture and marched forward, not slowing down.

He was walking pretty fast, as if he was going somewhere important. Not like I cared, though.

When he was in front of the dance studio, he paused and stared at the library next to it.

Out of the blue, he turned in my direction, and his eyes widened.

Alright, I’m done.

“What are you staring at? Do you think I’m following you or what?” I shouted.

He frantically shook his head. “N-No, I would never think-”

“Of course, you wouldn’t. Who am I to follow you around like I have nothing better to do?” I cut him off.

He stared at me, his mouth slightly open.

Hopefully, a fly will fly inside.

“But it’s interesting you’re heading the same way as me. Is this a joke?” I said, and drew closer, my arms folded.

He instantly took a step back.

“I-I work here.” He mumbled, and I almost couldn’t understand it.

I wanted to strangle him.

“Huh? You work at my dance studio?”

He stared at me as if he had no clue what I was blabbing about.

“Stop lying to me. This studio is only for the girls.” I said when he was silent.

He turned to the library and back to the studio, as if the distance between the two buildings was a problem.

“Oh. Of course, you work there . Another coincidence, huh?” I was fuming. Because of him, I was late to my lesson.

When another second of silence passed, I marched toward him, stopping so close I smelled his perfume-the scent of roses and sandalwood.

He gulped, gawking at me.

He was only a few inches taller than me, so I felt no intimidation.

I smirked. “Keep playing your game. I won’t be a part of it.” I whispered and hurried inside the studio. My mood got better after this encounter.

I was done with him, and I needed to get it off my chest.

“Girl, you’re ten minutes late,” Yumei said before she took a sip of water.

I sighed and dropped my bag to the floor. “I know. I didn’t mean to. It’s just that I had to deal with this guy.”

“A guy?” Dahlia appeared from nowhere. “Tell us everything. Age, his family status, and the color of his eyes. Is he a red flag or a red flag but with money?”

I laughed and crashed to the ground, stretching myself. “He’s no one. Something happened between us before the summer, and now he hates me. I told him what was on the tip of my tongue.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Sure. You definitely don’t like him.”

My forehead creased. “No! He’s not my type. He’s too innocent for someone like me.”

“Yet you still couldn’t keep your hands off him.” Yumei cut in.

Leah and Millie laughed, but I frowned.

“We didn’t fuck, for the record. Just did some…things.” I got back to my feet, pushing the knee pads on my knees.

“Whatever,” Yumei mumbled, reaching over to the laptop.

Once the music surrounded us, I pushed Jace and every worry of mine behind me.

• • •

“How’s school?” Dahlia asked as we stood in front of the building.

“Busy, but I’m passing. And you?” I let my hair fall down my shoulders.

Yumei took a long drag of a cigarette. “It’s hell.” She replied nonchalantly.

It was already dark outside; only the lamps and headlights of cars lit the streets and sidewalks.

“See you next week-and don’t be late,” Yumei said as she crushed the cigarette out and the cab pulled up. She climbed in first.

“Text me about that mystery guy,” Dahlia whispered, slipping inside after her.

I rolled my eyes. I had no intention to talk about him.

“Bye. Be safe.” I said as Dahlia rolled down her window.

Yumei smirked at me, and Dahlia waved as the cab started forward.

I watched as the smoke came out of the exhaust pipe, feeling the cold breeze sweep through me.

Yumei was similar to Jade, whereas Dahlia was like Emery. No matter how nosy or bitchy they were, they were like a family to me. A family I never had.

I didn’t consider my mother, Kayla, to be a part of my family.

I was so glad my father divorced her. He deserved someone better than her. And I, a good mother.

I folded my arms under my chest, wishing for a hoodie as I trudged in the opposite direction, heading back to the dorms.

The rustling of leaves created an eerie vibe, like something gruesome was about to happen. I watched far too many horror movies unwillingly to get the memo.

And just in a couple of seconds, goosebumps covered my skin.

I halted, feeling someone behind me.

Slowly, I opened my bag and wrapped my fingers around the hilt of a knife.

Abruptly, I whirled to the stalker behind me, only to be met with a pair of scared, hazel eyes.

I let out a shaky exhale, letting go of the knife.

“Are you insane?! Why are you creeping on me in the dark? I was ready to plunge a knife into your neck.” I shouted.

“I-I apologize…I didn’t mean to make you feel afraid.” He stuttered, blinking repeatedly.

“Well, you did. Congratulations.” I clapped. “Is this the final part of your joke? Wanting me to be scared while I’m walking alone at night? Do you enjoy torturing me?”

He stared at me like he saw the devil.

“I’m just walking from work.” He said quickly, as if he had to prepare himself to say a full sentence without stuttering.

I put my hand on my hip. “At the same time as me? A huge coincidence, don’t you think?”

“I-I’m sorry. I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.” His voice became softer.

I gripped the bag tightly over my shoulder. “Too bad you already did.”

I hurried down the street, my ears ringing. Who does he think he is?

I rounded the corner at the end of the street and saw in the distance a silhouette of two men. It’s easy to recognize them. They walk in a particular way.

I grabbed the knife again, keeping my hand inside the bag so as not to give away my weapon.

It was not my first time tossing a knife at creepy men in alleys.

“Hey!” One of them yelled. He sounded drunk.

I hate men.

I kept walking, never stopping as I neared them. I saw the wicked smile on their faces even in the dark.

My heart began to beat quicker, but I wasn’t thinking negatively. I still had a knife in my hand.

“Sexy bitch!” The other man yelled, and it was harder to move forward. The muscles in my legs hardened.

They were a couple of feet away from me, their mocking laughter carried by the air.

“Freya!”

I stopped and turned over my shoulder. Jace was racing my way, out of breath.

The men were next to me by the time he reached my side. His hood was up, his eyeglasses were gone, and his arm hovered around my middle, close but never touching my clothes.

Because he didn’t stop and kept on walking, I marched forward. The men looked at us but didn’t utter a word. We moved so fast, I didn’t even realize we reached the college.

After we passed the yard, Jace finally stopped in his tracks. We stood next to a willow tree with its leaves turning a bronze color.

The yard was reflected by tall lamps, and when I looked at Jace, his face was sweaty and red as a tomato.

My panting was not caused by the brisk walk but by the shock.

“Are you alright?” He choked out, catching his breath.

My gaze slid down to his mouth that was slightly open. His heart-shaped lips had a bit of pink color in them. I’ve never seen a prettier man’s lips.

I took a step toward him, my eyes never straying from his mouth. He staggered backward, almost losing his balance.

I kept drawing closer until his escape was destroyed by the trunk of the willow tree.

His chest was rising up and down at a fast speed, and his hands bored into the tree as if it could save him from me.

I slowly raised my gaze from his lips to his sleek nose and then to his eyes. He was quietly gasping, his eyelashes fluttering like butterfly wings.

I held his eyes hostage as I closed the remaining distance between us, our noses almost touching.

He repulsed me. He excited me. He made me feel too much.

I bit into my lower lip, welcoming the pain as a reminder that I couldn’t have him. I tasted a drop of his poison, and it almost killed me.

Without a word, I sprinted to the dormitory. Running away from my feelings, because they were better kept buried six feet under the ground.

⸻⸻

Chapter 7︱movie night

A few days had passed since I cornered Jace against the tree.

As much as I tried to forget about it, I kept seeing Jace before and after school. He was like a ghost, constantly everywhere.

Most of the time, he was alone-unless Jade or Emery dragged him along. It was kind of them, but I couldn’t help wondering if he even wanted to be surrounded by people so often.

If he felt differently, he didn’t show it.

I tried to avoid him and the girls when they were going somewhere because I knew they’d drag me with them, and I truly wasn’t fond of spending time with Jace, not after what I had done.

I knew it was stupid, yet I did it anyway.

I struggled to control my emotions. Especially in situations like this.

I hadn’t been aroused for months. So when I was so close to him and felt fire between my legs, I wanted to have another piece of him.

Before I ran for my life out of the school hallways, I looked sideways to be sure I wouldn’t come across Jace or the girls.

The hallway was thankfully clean.

I let out an exhale and hurried towards the exit.

My phone chimed with a text message.

Aury: Us. Tonight. My place. Movie night.

Emery: Nooooo! I can’t come. My mother wants me to go with her to another business meeting.

Both of Emery’s parents were rich. Her mother, Caroline, owned companies, while her father was a lawyer.

Her mother often called her to the meetings. Emery didn’t like it much.

Aury: I wanted to show you all our house. But don’t worry. It’s not the last visit.

Emery: Of course not! Enjoy it, even without me, and take Jace with you.

My heart skipped a beat.

Aury: Do you think he’ll want to come if you’re not there?

Emery: Yup! A few days ago, he asked me about y’all. He said he wanted to know you better.

Jade: Jace will come. I just texted him.

Since when does she have his phone number?

Aury: Greattt. We will have so much fun. Meet me outside the parking lot at 6.

Jade: Freya, why are you quiet? You know we can see you reading the chat.

I sighed.

Me: Ofc, I know that. I’ll come, but only if there’s popcorn and pizza.

Aury: How could we watch a movie without it?

Aury: And dress comfortably!

I turned my phone off and stood in the yard, contemplating running in front of a moving car. That would’ve been better than sitting near Jace, watching a movie, and acting like I didn’t want to fuck his brains out.

• • •

I stood in front of my closet, staring at all my clothes. There were a lot of them. I loved fashion, especially dresses.

But every time I wanted to wear something I craved at the moment, I didn’t have what I needed.

After twenty minutes, I picked dark brown sweatpants and a white, low-cut tank top.

I put on my favorite perfume everywhere I could, mostly in my hair. Today’s curls were the most defined. I looked cute.

Jade was already outside because she met up with her boyfriend, Kaiden. After putting him in the friend zone for years, she finally decided to date him. She did the right thing. They suited each other.

When I looked at them, I wondered if I’d ever experience such a thing.

I rushed downstairs, finding Jade alone with Jace. He was dressed in light gray sweatpants and a blue hoodie.

“Hey.” I greeted him.

He pulled his hands out of his pockets, rubbing them against the hoodie. “Hello.” He said, looking anywhere but at me.

Excellent.

“There you are!” Aury yelled, dressed in an oversized zipped hoodie of her favorite metal band and leggings, leaning against her car.

“This is going to be so much fun.” She smirked at me, and I wanted to gently strangle her. Why do I feel like this is some sort of revenge?

I often teased her about Ricky before they were dating.

She unlocked her car, and we all got in. I chose to sit in the front, far away from Jace’s heat.

During the ride to her house, we blasted all sorts of music. We weren’t the ones who judged for liking a different style of music. We loved all genres.

“Jace, what song do you pick?” Aury asked, glancing at him in the rearview mirror.

“Maybe… Moonlight , by Chase Atlantic ?” He replied shyly.

“I love them!” Aury exclaimed, and I searched for the song. Driving while on the phone is a death sentence.

Once the song began to play, I was surprised that Jace listened to that kind of music. I guess it suited his image.

“This is perfect for the car rides. I’ll add it to my driving playlist. Thanks for the song, Jace.” Aury said with a smile.

I slumped against the rolled-down window, the wind blowing my hair.

I was scared of driving, but I enjoyed the car rides with Aurellia. There was something soothing about it.

Fifteen minutes later, we pulled up in front of a sleek, modern house painted in shades of gray and black. It was exactly Aury’s dream home-she’d always loved modern architecture, especially in black.

The inside was far more beautiful. The hallway was long, with a marble floor and a small sitting area with a coffee table and two gray armchairs.

The hallway opened into the living room, which was on my right, its glass wall allowing a clear view straight in.

The living room was spacious, with a huge TV and a long gray couch. We settled in while Aury switched on the fireplace built beneath the screen.

“Where’s your crazy boyfriend? Won’t he bless us with his presence?” I asked.

Aury turned to me with narrowed eyes. “He went out with his friend Mason.”

“He has friends?” Jade chimed in, fairly confused like me.

“I know it’s hard to believe, but yes. Mason is probably the only one. Remember when we were drinking at Villa? He was there, too.” She said, sitting down beside me.

Jade flushed. “I was too busy with Kaiden to remember him.”

“I think he was talking with Emery at some point.” I cut in.

“Anyway,” Aury turned on the TV. “I need to make fresh popcorn. Jace, come to help me.”

Jace immediately got to his feet and strolled with Aury to the kitchen that was opposite the living room.

I relaxed on the couch, feeling cozy.

“Did you know Jace is working at the bookstore that I go to?” Jade suddenly asked.

“Oh, really? That’s great.” Telling her what happened between us was a bad idea. Aury’s teasing was terrible enough.

I pulled out my phone, checking who had seen my new story on Instagram. Except for the people I knew, there was one account that caught my eye.

user_123456789

If you’re going to stalk, at least pick a good username.

I turned my phone off, letting the stalker stalk me.

“By the way, how are you doing with Kaiden? Have you yet…?” I wondered.

Jade smiled, her cheeks so red compared to her pale skin. “Not yet. But we did other…things.”

I put my hand on her shoulder. “I’m so proud of you. By the time you two fuck, I’ll be a grandma.”

She slapped my hand. “I’m not rushing! And neither is he.”

“Oh, please,” I tilted my head. “If I were him, I’d want it A-S-A-P.”

Jade’s brow arched. “Are you confessing your love for me?”

I laughed. “I’ll kill him if he won’t satisfy you first.”

“Freya!” Jade covered her eyes. “I don’t want to talk about my intimate life with you. It’s between Kaiden and me.”

I raised my hands in surrender. “As you wish, sweetheart.”

“Are you a genie? I want three wishes granted.” Aury said, walking into the living room with a large bowl of popcorn, Jace right behind her, carrying another one.

“Jace, sit next to Freya. She’s too jumpy during horror movies, and I get annoyed by it.” She pushed him onto the couch beside me, and she sat next to Jade.

I’m going to kill her.

My eye began to twitch. This semester was becoming worse and worse by each day.

Aury picked the horror movie called The Boy . None of us ever saw it.

As the movie progressed, my blood pressure rose higher. Because I couldn’t handle scary movies well, Aury deliberately picked something that my poor heart could handle.

The movie was still scary as fuck.

I reached my hand for the popcorn and immediately froze.

Fuck.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

I looked at Jace, who was already staring at me, our hands touching.

Why are his pupils so goddamn large when he’s wearing glasses?

I whipped my head to the TV, trying to enjoy the movie, but in vain. His soft skin was branded into mine-the stare of his Bambi eyes.

I gulped, the taste for popcorn long gone. I focused on the TV screen, wondering what would happen next, and of course, when I least expected it, a jump scare made me bump my shoulder into Jace’s.

I recalled what Jade said about respecting his space, and I felt like I was an intruder, trying to rob him of it.

“Sorry,” I mumbled, only for him to hear it.

He took a deep breath, fidgeting with his fingers. “I don’t mind.”

“You don’t?” I glanced at him.

He looked at me, this time with confidence. “No.”

I didn’t understand him. I truly didn’t. He never explained why he ran that morning from my arms. He never told me he was sorry for embarrassing me. So why was he pulling such an expected move on me?

The movie got towards the end, weirdly romantic? Aury and Jade were the most interested in it.

I always wondered what that girl was reading in those books, but she always hid them from me. The truth must be brutal.

After the movie was over, Jade suggested we should play chess. I honestly sucked at it. I wasn’t good at games.

As Jace was placing the pieces in the correct spot, I went to the bathroom. I still looked great, but my cheeks were far redder than they were before we came here.

I took a deep breath and put a smile on my face like always. When I exited the bathroom, I collided with someone.

Of course, it was Jace.

I sighed and grabbed him by his hoodie. I dragged him into the bathroom and then slammed him against the wall.

He was breathing heavily, even though I hadn’t done anything yet.

I banged my hand beside his head and drew closer, blowing a curl from my vision.

“Listen to me, pretty boy. You won’t utter a word about what happened between us.” I whispered.

His pupils were large again.

“Did you hear what I just said? I don’t like to repeat myself.”

“I apologize-”

I moved to his ear and whispered, “I don’t give a fuck about what happened between us.” I pulled back. “And I won’t accept an apology from you, because there’s nothing to apologize for. I was drunk. I don’t remember a thing from that night. Us? Won’t ever happen again.”

His eyebrows knitted together in an instant.

As I was about to leave the bathroom, he snatched me by the hand. He interlaced our fingers, holding them in a tight grip. His hand was sweaty and hot, and I felt my own sweat on my forehead.

“If you have nothing to say, let go of me,” I said, looking into his widened eyes.

My heart throbbed against my chest.

He opened his mouth to say something when the front door shut loudly. His grip on my hand eased, and I took it as a chance to let my hand get free.

I yanked the door open, ready to return to the living room, when in the middle of the hallway stood Aury’s boyfriend, Ricky.

He noticed me immediately, but his face turned into a grin after Jace got out of the bathroom as well.

He raised his eyebrows at me and pressed his index finger against his lips.

Without a word, he entered the living room, greeting Aury and Jade. I went after him, not caring that Jace was immediately behind me.

“It looks like you’re having fun.” He said, hugging Aury from behind.

“Yeah, until you came,” I said.

He laughed. “You must be having fun, Frena. A lot of it tonight.”

I sat down on the couch, cross-legged, ignoring him.

“Stop, Ricky. Be nice.” Aury scolded him.

We started to play chess, and Ricky dragged Jace outside for a smoke. Jace didn’t smoke, so it must’ve been horrible for him. I got used to it because of Yumei. I tried cigarettes, but they weren’t my thing. I liked vodka better. It felt like it burned away all the rotten parts of me.

I almost forgot Ricky was his family. They were complete opposites of each other.

And so was I, and Jace.

⸻⸻

Chapter 8︱silence

Taking a nap while it’s raining is the best thing I’ve ever experienced.

I opened my eyes fully on the third try and saw that Jade wasn’t in the bed. She was sitting behind her desk, working on the laptop.

“Don’t tell me you’re doing an assignment right now,” I said, covered head to toe by my fluffy blanket.

“I’m not like you. I don’t want to do things last-minute and then panic,” Jade replied, staring at the laptop screen.

I sighed. “I see why Jace likes you. You two are very similar when it comes to studying.”

She frowned and turned to me, her blue eyes judging what came out of my mouth.

“Jace doesn’t like me. He sees me as a friend.”

I laughed. “Are you sure about that? He always talks to you. Even more than with Emery, and she’s his cousin.”

Jade put her black eyeglasses down. “Why are you mad? I thought you didn’t like Jace at all.”

“I’m not mad.” I scoffed. “Do I sound mad to you?”

Jade got up from the chair and sat down at the edge of my bed.

“Do you like Jace? Because you sound jealous as fuck.”

I sat up straight, my hair messy. “N-No! Why the hell would I like him? He’s not my type. I’m not into innocent men.”

She narrowed her eyes at me. “Or maybe he’s exactly your type, and you can’t face the truth.”

I smiled, caressing her straight black hair. “You read too much romance, sweetie. I only fuck fuckboys because we both want the same thing. Jace never touched a girl in his life, and he hates me.”

She yanked my hand away. “No, he doesn’t. He asked what kind of dancing you do after I told him you go twice a week to the dance studio across from the bookstore.”

“Why would you tell him that?” I snapped. “Because of you, I’m meeting him every time I go dancing!”

Jade’s eyes grew wide.

Fuck. My mouth slipped.

“So something did happen between you, too! I sensed a tension when we went to Aury’s house.”

I’m screwed.

I buried my face in my palms. “Unfortunately…it was a mistake. We were both drunk, and it seemed Jace didn’t enjoy my company, since he fled in the morning.”

“I knew it was weird he just left like that! God, now it all makes sense.” She laughed.

I nudged her in the shoulder. “Are you finding my humiliation enjoyable?”

“Aww, is Freya sad because for the first time a man wasn’t chasing her ass?”

“Bitch!” I lunged at her, tickling the places on her body that made her spill tears.

I tickled her until she couldn’t breathe, and her eyeliner got smeared.

“Stopppp!” She yelled, and I finally surrendered.

After she caught her breath, she smiled at me. “So what will you do? Pretend nothing happened?”

I nodded. “Yeah, because there’s no point in being aware of it. Jace and I could never work.”

It’d feel like I ruined him. He’s too innocent for someone like me.

I don’t put importance on relationships. I get bored by men pretty easily. And Jace doesn’t look like the type of guy who could do hookups.

His reaction was enough of an answer.

The buzz of my phone made us both still. I reached for my phone, seeing new messages from my mother.

Kayla: Where are you? I’m waiting at the campus for you. Or are you playing a slut again?

Kayla: You’d better come fully clothed. I don’t want to get embarrassed by you.

A bile rose to my throat.

“Who is it?” Jade asked.

I turned my phone off. “Kayla. She’s here.”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“No, it’s better if I go alone. But thank you.” I gave her a quick smile and got off the bed.

The girls were aware of my problems with my mother. She was constantly calling me, texting me, and begging for money that my dad gave me.

It was like a song on a loop. It never ended.

I didn’t care for an umbrella. I went outside; it was a gloomy day, and there weren’t many students on campus.

My mother was wearing old sweatpants and a stained sweatshirt. She didn’t look cold. Maybe because she was filled with alcohol.

“There you are,” she said as I drew closer, looking up and down at me. “I can’t believe you didn’t wear something revealing. It doesn’t look like you.”

Her comments no longer angered me. I’d listened to it nonstop until my father divorced her.

“What do you want now? Money again?” I asked and folded my arms under my chest.

She laughed, shook her head, and then abruptly slapped me across the cheek.

It happened so quickly, I had no time to react.

I touched my stinging cheek, my blood boiling.

“You little whore. Stop being disrespectful. It was I who put you into this world. It’s because of me you’re alive.” She seethed.

I chuckled. “It’s your fault I’m here. If you didn’t open your legs, Kayla, we wouldn’t be standing here right now.”

She was about to hit me again, yet this time, I caught her wrist.

“Raise your ugly hand at me one more time, and I’ll call the cops. I won’t give you my father’s money, and I won’t let you harass me. Get out of my life.” I pushed her by her shoulders, and she staggered back.

“You will pay for this, bitch. You won’t win against me.” She whispered with disgust and turned on her heel away.

I took a deep breath as I watched her leave. Once she was out of my sight, I crumbled to the nearby bench.

The rain was cascading down my back. I was so cold. I wanted to go back to my room, but I couldn’t let Jade see me like this.

I couldn’t hold the tears anymore. I was too furious that Kayla was still making my life a living hell with her calls and texts, always degrading me because I loved to live my life freely.

I sat motionless on the bench, staring into nothingness. Students who passed by me must’ve thought I was going through a breakup.

I closed my eyes and let the tears silently roll down my cheeks.

I wanted to call my dad and tell him what had happened, but I didn’t want to worry him. He had been through so much pain and anxiety. Kayla broke my father apart, and after years, he was finally putting himself back together.

“Fuck.” I whispered, with my fists clenched.

Suddenly, a shadow fell over me, and the rain no longer touched my skin.

I looked up, almost laughing. He is truly everywhere.

Jace stood in front of me, holding a purple umbrella over my head.

“Are you here to laugh at me because I’m a mess?!” I exclaimed.

Jace didn’t utter a word, just sat down beside me, holding the umbrella over my head.

I turned to him with furrowed

brows. I didn’t understand why he was wasting his time sitting with me, getting wet. I was already drenched, anyway.

We sat in total silence, the rain splashing against the ground.

He stayed with me for I don’t know how long, out there in the rain. It must have been more than half an hour. He kept a small distance between us, yet held the umbrella steady over me the entire time. I was sure his hand had to be aching, but I didn’t want to break the silence.

No matter how much I wanted to shout at him to get lost, I couldn’t because I liked the silence between us. And the fact that he had no idea what happened and stayed with me while tears spilled from my eyes.

For that, I disliked him a bit less.

⸻⸻

chapter 9︱shadow

Finally, it was Friday, and I could go dancing. This past week was horrible; I thought about nothing but my family drama. So I needed to shift my thoughts elsewhere.

I entered the dance studio, and Yumei and Dahlia were stretching their bodies. Leah, Gabriela, and Anna were practicing some dance moves in front of the mirrors.

I pulled my hair into a ponytail and joined them in stretching.

“Hey.” I greeted them.

“What’s up, girl? You look sad,” Dahlia said, and Yumei glanced at me.

I shrugged. “Not the best week of my life. I want another vacation that will last forever.” I tried to chuckle.

“Agree! And the weather is horrible. It’s so cold.” Dahlia complained.

Yumei sighed. “You two are constantly complaining. Who prefers to be sweaty all the time? And if you want a break from reality, Freya, just dance.”

She was right. Life wasn’t easy. I wasn’t a little girl anymore. I had to get my shit together.

“Anna, play the fifth song of my playlist,” Yumei called, positioning herself on her knees.

She wore black shorts and a black short-sleeved turtle tank top. Her short hair was styled in soft waves, thrown to the side.

The song, I Luv This Shit began to play, and Yumei started to whip her hair from side to side, her hands traveling up her body.

We all stilled and watched her.

She briefly lifted herself, planting her hands on the floor and stretching them out in front of her. Her head tilted swiftly up, and her knees spread.

Yumei smirked at me, and my heart skipped a beat. I wasn’t expecting that.

She moved to the side of her legs and then positioned herself on her ass.

Her hands went behind her back, and her legs spread apart. Like a spider, she stretched her legs and arms outward, craning her head back.

We all stared at her wide-eyed. We never saw her move like that before.

She smiled, folded one leg, and kicked the other in the air.

Wow. She is so flexible.

I was so mesmerized by her moves that I overlooked the fact that the girls had joined her.

She rolled to her feet, shifted to a squatting position, and all the girls joined her. Their bodies moved from side to side, slowly rising to their feet.

They swayed their hips and whipped their hair most seductively.

“Yes!!” I cheered them on, hyping them up because they deserved it.

• • •

Every lesson, someone has a solo dance, and today it was me.

The girls picked a random song, and I had to improvise.

Hands To Myself by Selena Gomez echoed through the room.

I was feeling myself. Not doing the moves perfectly, but aligning them with the rhythm of the song.

Dahlia clapped and cheered for me. It kept me smiling.

I bent to my feet, brushing my fingers up my legs, until I straightened, my ponytail slapping my back like a whip.

I dropped to my knees, leaning on my hands and swaying my legs, grinning at the girls in the mirror.

Then I saw it-a shadow by the door.

My heart jumped, and I fell back onto my ass, eyes locked on the figure.

“Who’s there?” I yelled, and the girls turned to look at the door.

The shadow instantly moved, and I sprang to my feet, running after the person who was creepily watching us dance.

“Stop running, you little dickhead!” I exclaimed, rushing to the hallway, but there was no one there anymore.

I ran to the front door, breathing hard, and yanked it open. No one was there.

“Fuck,” I muttered, and Yumei appeared beside me, holding me by the waist.

“Don’t do this again. That person could’ve kidnapped you or stabbed you,” she said, her dark eyes sharp and narrow, her voice full of worry.

I chuckled. “I once ran after a guy who stole my purse. I doubt he can have children now.”

She rolled her eyes with a chuckle. “Still, don’t do this again. We should start locking the door.”

I analyzed the street, hoping to see someone hiding from our eyes. “Yeah, you’re right.”

She tugged at my waist. “Let’s go inside.”

I threw one last glance at the bookstore across the street, seeing that it was still open, before we walked inside.

• • •

We all admitted we were stupid for not locking the door, but until now, nothing like this had happened.

This street was always quiet and peaceful.

Once we all exited the building, I headed to the bookstore. Jade’s birthday was coming up, and she always asks for more books.

That’s her favorite type of present.

I walked in, the small bell on the door chiming. No one was behind the register, so I strolled to the romance category.

“Why does this cover look like a children’s book?” I murmured to myself, judging the weird cartoon illustration.

Must be some sort of fetish.

I read the blurb of five books, but they all sounded boring to me. Is this what she’s always reading?

Just as I was about to look for a worker to help me pick something, I met with Jace’s wide eyes.

Why does he always look at me like I’m pointing a gun at him?

“I’m not here because of you.” I clarified. “I want to buy a book for Jade.”

He came closer, but not too close. His cheeks were red, his hair messy.

“What would you recommend?” I asked, staring at the rows of books.

When he didn’t reply, I caught him staring at my thighs. I was too lazy to change into something else, so I kept my shorts and put a jacket on.

“Are you checking me out?”

Jace’s cheeks turned ten shades darker. He spun from me and vanished behind a wall of books.

I suppressed a smile. After all, he was still just a man.

I quietly tiptoed to him, seeing that he was covering his face with his hands.

“I need your help, pretty boy. Get embarrassed later.” I said, and I seemed to startle him.

Jace stood in front of me like a statue, and I didn’t know if I should slap him to get him out of the trance or just walk away.

I sighed and headed to a different section of books, crouching at the lowest row. I wasn’t a reader, so I didn’t know what to pick.

After a few seconds, someone shadowed me. I looked up, and Jace was handing me a book.

I rose, taking it from him. The cover was black, decorated with a skull and white rose petals. I liked it better, but it was a bit scary.

“Is this a horror book?” I asked.

Jace shook his head and opened the page with numerous trigger warnings.

The words that caught my attention were: BLOOD PLAY, DEGRADATION, CHOKING.

I stared at the other trigger warnings with my jaw hanging on the floor.

I flicked my eyes to Jace. “Are you sure this is what she’s reading?”

He nodded, rubbing the back of his neck. “When she was here, she was looking at it for several minutes.”

Maybe I didn’t know Jade as well as I thought.

“I’ll take it.” I gave him the book. “But if you’re wrong, I’ll come for you.”

I passed by him to the register, totally shocked that books like this existed. I needed to step up my game, I guess. It sounded weirdly interesting.

I paid for the book and put it in my bag. As I was about to leave, I noticed the shopping hours printed on the door.

Jace should’ve closed the store two hours ago.

Strange .

I glanced at him, and he was already by my side with his belongings.

Without a word, I opened the door and began walking down the street with the sound of my heels click-clacking.

Jace was behind me-his shadow stretching across the sidewalk. Something about him was sketchy. The closing hours, and that he could suddenly close the store when I was leaving.

“Are you following me?” I asked suddenly, walking at an unhurried pace.

He rushed to my side, his arms folded, hood pushed up. “N-No! Are you…uncomfortable?”

I chuckled. “You should be the one uncomfortable.” I halted and turned to him. “I aspire to be like you. So apathetic. Is there something you even care about?”

He looked hurt. Good.

“Yes.” That’s all he said, staring into my eyes.

I grinned and continued walking. “Good for you then.”

He was by my side in a couple of seconds, and I wondered why he didn’t feel bad at all about leaving me in the closet, half-naked. What was wrong with him?

“Are you coming to Jade’s birthday party?” I asked as we turned to the next street.

“Yes, Aury invited me.”

“Oh, great.”

We all prepared a secret birthday party for Jade. She hated surprises, but she deserved to be celebrated.

And I deserved alcohol.

That’s where our chit-chat ended. I was usually the one trying to have a conversation.

I glanced at Jace; his hands were tucked into his jeans pockets, and his cheeks were slightly pink.

He looked very obedient for some reason. That if I wanted to, I could bend him however I liked, and he would thank me for it.

Fuck, that’s a crazy thought.

A shudder coursed through me.

A few moments later, Jace hung his jacket on my shoulders.

“I don’t need it.” I began to take it off.

“I-It’s not mine!” He exclaimed breathlessly. “Give it back to Jade, please.”

He gave me one last glance before he hurried to the school gate.

I knew Jade well enough to know this wasn’t her jacket, and his weird excuse to give it to me confused me, to say the least.

⸻⸻

I swear, writing about dancing is not easy. (I’m a horrible dancer, btw)

chapter 10︱voice

On Friday, Emery, Aury, and I went to the shopping center, since the two of them needed to buy a gift for Jade.

Thankfully, Aury had a car and drove us; otherwise, we would have had to call a cab.

She was the only one in our friend group who had a driver’s license, so in a way, we are all using her. But when it comes to best friends, it doesn’t count.

“What are you gifting her?” Emery asked me as we walked by the shops.

“A book and a mug with my face on it. She needs to appreciate me when she drinks from it.”

I wanted to give her much more, but my dad worked as a car mechanic. The money he sent me was what he earned for a living, and I couldn’t take that for granted.

Unlike Aury, who worked at our college coffee shop, I couldn’t handle college and work. I’m a slow person when it comes to learning or doing assignments. I always have to do them in advance, bit by bit, or my brain would explode.

Maybe that sounds like an excuse to some people, but everyone is different. Only a strong person can handle that much of a burden on their shoulders.

“I saved up some money, but Ricky told me to pay with his card, and that I can buy her whatever I want,” Aury said. “So I decided to buy her a necklace that she once showed me-a Victorian-style silver oval set with an onyx stone.”

Emery groaned. “Wow, that’s great that both of you know what to buy her, but I don’t! She doesn’t like Chanel or Gucci, and I know nothing besides that. You chose all the good options, leaving me nothing.”

Aury and I laughed.

“Honestly, Jade appreciates everything you give her,” I said.

“I know, but I want something special. Not just a random present.” Emery sulked.

We passed the gaming store, and Emery suddenly came to a halt.

She drew closer to the glass wall, staring at something.

We walked over to her, my eyes growing wide at the simracer setup that had a wheel, pedals, and a gearbox.

“Jade likes gaming. She will love this!” Emery exclaimed, running inside the gaming shop.

We stared after her, a small smile playing on our lips.

• • •

After all the shopping, we sat down at a coffee shop. Both Emery and Aury bought what they needed. Of course, Emery had to buy some new clothes because otherwise she’d die.

“Who are we inviting to the party?” Aury asked, sipping the coffee.

“Well, a lot of people. But mainly Kaiden’s close friends and a couple of girls that Jade talks to frequently. Then us, of course, Kaiden, Jace, Josh, and Ricky.”

Josh was Aury’s friend and coworker. He had a thing for Emery.

I rolled my eyes. “Ricky doesn’t even care for Jade.”

Aury narrowed her eyes at me.

“What? It’s the truth.” I scoffed.

“Girls, let’s not fight. It’s Jade’s birthday party. We can put everything aside for one night.” Emery said.

Aury sighed. “Yeah, I agree. It’s not like I’m mad at you, Freya. Ricky is a dick most of the time.”

My mouth broke into a smile. “A hot dick. That’s why he’s worth it, right?”

Aury laughed, covering her mouth. “Exactly.”

I never liked fighting with the girls, especially when it was over a man. None of them was worthy of hurting our friendship.

“By the way, will Jace be okay? He doesn’t like parties, and so many new people will be there.” Aury pointed out.

Emery set the cup of coffee on the wooden table, holding it still around the handle. “You know, he wasn’t always like this. Believe it or not, he talked more than I.”

Jace? Talking more than Emery? That thought seems impossible.

“What happened?” I asked.

Emery gazed into the coffee, twirling it with a spoon. “He was always a nerdy boy. He loved Legos, board games, learning new interesting facts about the Earth, and sharing them with us. Every time I came to play with toys, he had so many fascinating things to say, and I was envious because I was boring compared to him.”

“Then one day he came from school crying. He didn’t want to talk to anybody, and he refused to go back to school. Jace’s mom had to take him to a psychologist to make him speak. After countless sessions, Jace finally admitted that he was being constantly bullied by his classmates. Whenever he tried to speak, they would slap him or shove him to the ground, screaming in his face that his voice was irritating, that his yapping annoyed them. They just wanted him to shut his mouth for good.”

The silence following Emery’s words was very loud.

I felt guilty and awful. I had many bullies as well. However, I took care of them, unlike Jace. The kids in middle school were terrified of me.

I thought Jace was just an introvert who didn’t want to talk, but it seemed he tried his hardest to be the way he used to be.

“What happened after that? Did he change schools?” Aurellia wondered, her eyebrows knitted together.

Emery nodded, a faint smile on her face. “Yeah, but he never went back to his old self. He made only one friend that he still talks to this day, but no big friend groups. That’s why I always bring him with us. I want to see the old Jace one day again.”

On our way back to college, I stared out of the window, thinking about Jace and his childhood. He must have had it hard. He didn’t tell anyone about the bullying until he was pushed to it.

I called him apathetic.

Maybe I was no different than those bullies.

Although I’d still like to know why he left me that morning so abruptly, I decided to let it go and try to become friends with him.

I wanted to help Emery and the wounded boy who was still inside Jace, holding onto him.

I’d forget about what happened between us and go back to hooking up because that’s how I worked.

I needed to feel someone’s want for me. That they craved me more than anything in the entire world, even if it was for one night.

Jace surely wanted to be my friend. Otherwise, he wouldn’t want to speak to me. And he made it crystal clear that he had no desire to have something more with me.

It was for the best anyway.

⸻⸻

chapter 11︱butterflies

A week later, we all began preparing for Jade’s secret birthday party.

Emery suggested a black dress code because it was Jade’s favorite color. I didn’t understand why people thought that black is meant for funerals.

Black meant elegance.

I picked a short black dress that had thin straps and was tight around the waist but loose around my ass. It was very short, but I liked the thrill of it.

Emery went for a sleek look. Her dress was satin, with an asymmetrical skirt.

Aury decided on a skirt with a slit on the side and a laced, corset-style top.

Kaiden stole Jade away. One of his presents was a gothic lace dress, with long, loose sleeves and a small tie at the neckline.

We told him to take her to a hotel because he wanted to be the first to see her in the dress. After that, he’d kidnap her to the birthday party.

Emery was the one who took care of the preparations. No one could stop her when it came to parties. She was the best at it.

Before Jade’s arrival, we all hid behind a couch. Emery asked Josh to help her find the perfect place-far from apartments and houses-so we could party freely without any restrictions.

We placed the presents on a table with a cake and decorated the whole room with balloons.

It took us two hours to get it done.

As footsteps drew closer, we all tensed. Emery crouched beside me, barely holding in her laughter. She was incapable of being serious, and it was so contagious that I nearly laughed too.

Aurellia was glaring at us the whole time.

I peeked over the couch as Jade entered, Kaiden behind her, covering her eyes with his palms.

“I’ll personally dig a hole for the person who did this,” Jade mumbled, and Emery froze.

When she was in the center of the room, the lights went on, and we all jumped from behind the couch, screaming happy birthday.

No matter how much Jade didn’t like surprises, she couldn’t hide the love in her eyes that she had for us.

The music began to play, and we all gathered around her.

“Happy birthday, bitch.” I hugged her tightly.

She chuckled, squeezing me harder.

“I feel like I’m in high school,” Jade murmured into my ear.

I rolled my eyes, pushing her away. “Girl, stop acting as if you were a grandma.”

Everyone laughed, including Jace.

The girls hugged her after me, and then Jace. She then greeted the others who came. It had been a while since I’d seen her smile so much.

After all the congratulations, we sat down on the huge couch. Colorful lights replaced the normal lights, making it truly look like a party.

“A lot of people are here.” Josh sat down beside me.

He looked ordinary-nothing special, but I guess it was better than those fuckboys that Emery always chased.

“Yeah, I don’t know half of them.” I let out a laugh.

Josh reached for the alcohol, pouring a shot for himself and me.

“So…” I began. “How are you progressing with Emery?”

He gave me the shot with a glance. “She’s kind of…pushing me away. She still replies to my messages, but it’s like she’s scared of something.”

I chugged the shot in one go. “Emery was always the one chasing after men. Like all of us, she wants to be loved. My advice? You should be the one chasing her. She’s just not used to that.”

Josh nodded, a new goal glinting in his eyes.

He was honestly a nice guy. But I wondered if that was enough for Emery. If she were into men like Josh, why would she go after fuckboys?

I snapped out of my thoughts.

Jade was dancing with Aury and Emery, and they were all smiling. I loved to see them happy.

I poured myself another shot, drinking it swiftly.

“I’m going to dance with Emery. Wish me luck.” Josh said, staring at her.

I raised my empty glass in the air, and he was on his way to her.

“Hey.”

I looked up, and one of Kaiden’s friends was standing over me. He had light brown hair and dark eyes. He wasn’t bad looking, but nothing special in my eyes.

“Hi. I’m Freya.” I extended my hand.

He took it and gently squeezed it. “Cameron. Nice to meet you.”

He sat next to me, taking the empty glass from my hand and filling it up for me.

“Kaiden should’ve introduced us sooner.” He said.

I raised a brow. “Oh, why so?”

He leaned closer, placing the shot in my hand. “Because you look like I’d do bad things for you.”

I cocked my head. “Really? And what are those bad things? Stealing chips from the grocery store?”

Cameron laughed, pulling back.

I hated when men were full of shit. I knew well enough that he was just full of words and nothing else.

Suddenly, he reached for my hair, twirling it. “I love curly hair.”

The way I fucking hate it when people touch my hair as if they have never seen curls in their whole lives.

Like, it’s just hair.

“Sorry, but Kaiden is looking for you.”

I turned, and Jace was standing next to me, his fists clenched.

“I’ll be right back,” Cameron smirked at me, heading to Kaiden.

Jace, without a word, took Cameron’s place with a trembling exhale.

“What happened?” I asked. “Too many people here for you?”

He shook his head and glanced at my hair.

“Drink!!!!” Emery exclaimed, clapping as Jade began to swallow the alcohol straight out of the bottle.

I laughed and joined them. The music got louder, people were dancing and laughing, and I felt the alcohol burning in my veins. It was a strange feeling. A bit freeing.

“Dance with me!” I grabbed Jade’s hands, pulling them into the air.

Emery was by my right with Josh. It seemed that he didn’t need my luck.

Aurellia was dancing with Ricky, and Jace was sitting by himself on the couch.

There was a sudden pang in my chest.

After the song ended, Kaiden tapped my shoulder.

“Can I borrow my girlfriend?”

I smirked. “You can only borrow her. She’s mine.”

We both laughed, and I stepped back.

The song S&M by Rihanna began to play, and Aury abandoned her boyfriend to dance her way to me.

We started to sing the lyrics at the top of our lungs. This was one of our favorite songs.

Soon enough, Emery joined us, and lastly, Jade. We danced together as if it cost our lives, swaying our hips and moving our hands in the air.

Jade was probably the most drunk out of all of us. She was stumbling and laughing at everything.

We danced for half an hour non-stop. I staggered back to the couch because I needed more alcohol in my system. I wanted to forget about my mother for at least one full night.

For a moment, I lost my balance, and someone’s hand landed on my lower back.

I set the bottle on the table and met those hazel eyes.

His hand was soft and hot on my skin, even though I was already burning. He was looking up at me with his wide eyes, and I had a million dirty thoughts running through my head.

I bent down and snatched his wrist, pulling him onto his feet.

He was saying something, but I couldn’t hear him over the music.

Everyone was dancing, and I wouldn’t let him sit like a lone dog on the couch.

“I-I don’t know how to dance,” Jace yelled over the music.

“Just feel it in your body. Don’t be like a robot.” I yelled back, moving my head from side to side, dragging my hands down my body.

Jace’s eyes widened.

I wanted to get closer to him, to put my hands on his chest, but I knew he’d hate it.

He shifted slightly, a flush creeping into his cheeks.

I let my gaze travel over him, head to toe, heat pooling low in my stomach. He looked dangerously good in black. I’d never seen him wear anything so dark before.

When our eyes met, I drew in a sharp breath. The way he looked at me was almost painful, as if the moment itself was hurting him.

“Maybe I should find Cameron,” I mumbled, looking around.

Jace suddenly grabbed my wrist, his slender fingers long and pretty, like a pianist’s hands.

“Don’t go.” He said and pulled me to him.

My heart jumped out of my chest.

Why is he like this suddenly?

His chest was rapidly going up and down, and his hand was sweaty.

“I don’t understand your language, Jace. What do you want from me?” I asked, not breaking eye contact.

He opened his mouth, his lips quivering. “Don’t go after another guy.”

“But why?!” I scoffed. “Why does it bother you that I want to go after Cameron?”

He flicked his gaze away, then back to me, looking as though he might crumple to the floor at any second.

I made sure Emery wasn’t watching us and intertwined our fingers. I dragged him to the back of the building, where there was no light or blasting music because this was too overstimulating for him.

I didn’t want Emery to know I was alone with Jace because she was too overprotective of him. She didn’t want anyone to hurt him when he was already hurt enough.

The room I dragged us to was more like a storage room with lots of tables and chairs.

I sat him down on one of those wooden chairs, even though I could barely see where I was going. Only the moonlight cast a brief light through the windows at us.

“There must be a light switch here somewhere.”

As I was about to move, Jace’s arms came around my middle, and his face nuzzled into my stomach.

I never understood the saying about feeling butterflies in your stomach, yet at least thousands of them exploded in my lower belly at that moment.

His fingers dug so deeply into my back that I felt his fingernails.

Jace let out a light groan, and my core clenched after months of staying silent.

“This is killing me.” He whispered in a harsh tone. “Don’t go, please. Just don’t go after him.”

My heart was on the verge of its demise because of the way it pulsed. At least fifty years of my lifespan caught up to me.

“J-Jace, what are you doing? Did you drink?” My voice softened. It was impossible for me to be a bitch to him when he was wrapped around me. I felt his warmth everywhere. On my back, stomach, and thighs as I stood between his legs.

My hands hung in the air, but I craved to bury them in his long hair and push his lovely face between my legs.

“I just can’t watch you be near another man.” He whispered.

“Why not?”

“I can’t-”

“But why? I thought you hated me.”

Jace finally pulled back to look at me. His eyes glistened.

“God, no.” His fingers brushed through his hair, his other hand still on my waist. “How could I, when every time I’m near you, it’s harder to take a breath.”

My throat got dry. I had no idea how to react to what was coming out of his mouth. I couldn’t believe it. For months, I thought he couldn’t stand me, and now everything turned upside down.

It just couldn’t be real.

He stared at me, expecting some kind of reaction, but I was merely frozen, breathing quickly.

Jace propped his chin on my stomach with both of his hands on my hips.

At that very moment, I realized I’d never been looked at this way. With so much longing and craving, torment and shyness.

I thought I knew my emotions, but Jace proved me wrong. His feelings for me made me uneasy. What else was he hiding behind that innocent look of his?

I always knew what to expect from men. But Jace was different. His every action surprised me.

It must’ve taken him a tremendous amount of courage to tell me his true feelings. My heart hurt from it.

I averted my gaze into the pitch darkness, trying to slow down my heartbeat.

“W-We should go back.” I managed to say.

Jace rose to his feet, squeezing my hips. Every nerve in my body tickled, and I just wanted to jump at him.

“After you.” He said softly, his hot breath on my skin.

I let out a quick exhale and turned on my heel to the door.

For the first time in my life, a man made me stutter.

⸻⸻

Hey, y’all. I update twice a week for those who wonder. Thank you for reading! Love u, xx.

chapter 12︱coward

For the first time in history, I wasn’t late to a class.

After what happened over the weekend at the birthday party, anxiety anchored at the pit of my stomach.

I couldn’t sleep well. I kept turning from side to side, to my stomach, and all over again. Nothing could make me fall asleep. Not even my celebrity crush’s face.

I was utterly fucked.

That’s why I woke up before Jade and kept my makeup minimal, though I did pile on the lip gloss. I couldn’t stand dry lips.

I sat on my bed, facing Jade, and drank coffee. A million thoughts swirled through my head, and I despised every single one.

Jace confessed that he liked me.

Now what?

Jade’s phone alarm started ringing. She slowly pushed herself upright, and when her eyes finally landed on me, she flinched.

“Oh God, I almost pissed myself. Why are you sitting there like a ghost?” she asked.

“I want to be one, without emotions, just scaring whoever I want.” I took a long sip of my coffee.

She stared at me with her narrowed eyes for a few moments before she got up to get ready.

I followed her to the bathroom. “Did I pick the right book for you?” I asked.

Jade stopped brushing her teeth. “It’s so filthy. Thank you again.”

Wow. I’m stunned.

“It was Jace who helped me pick it,” I confessed.

Her eyes went wide with surprise. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

I let her get ready and grabbed my bag, stuffing it with useless things. I seriously needed to get my life together.

• • •

For the first time in forever, Jade and I arrived at the lecture hall before Aury and Emery. We took our seats while people continued to pour in. Far more than usual.

“Hey, there’s Jace,” Jade pointed out. He was coming up the steps, dressed in black slacks and a gray sweatshirt.

My heart started racing.

Jade waved at him, and he only faintly smiled. I thought he’d sit close to us, but he chose the lower row.

“What’s going on with him? He always sits in front of us.” Jade noted.

I’m sure it has something to do with me.

I knew Jace wouldn’t say such things to me if he were sober. He was too embarrassed to face me.

“Hi!” Emery sat down beside me. “I can’t believe you’re here sooner than we are. What happened?”

“A miracle,” Aury said, sitting beside Jade.

I rolled my eyes. “Be glad we came. Otherwise, someone would take our seats.”

They all chuckled, but not me. I stared down at Jace, only seeing his hair. He was sitting next to a girl, who was leaning into him, asking him something.

He didn’t even look at her, yet my fingers curled into fists, my nails cutting into my skin.

Throughout the whole lecture, I was merely watching him. First, he confessed to me, and then he sat beside some random girl whose arm kept brushing against his.

Was he lying to me? Was that a part of his stupid game? To deceive me?

The entire lecture was painful. I couldn’t wait to get out and corner Jace. He saw me weak and stuttering, but I wasn’t like that. I was strong. Confident. And bitchy.

“I need to take a piss. Go without me.” I announced as Jace began to descend the stairs with the girl by his side.

I hurried after him, following him across the long hall. The girl was talking to him, and Jace kept nodding.

I caught up to them, panting, and called, “Jace.”

He halted and turned to me, stunned.

“I need to talk to you,” I said, looking up and down at the girl. “Alone.”

Jace kept his eyes on me as the girl awkwardly walked away.

“Made a new friend? She’s pretty.” I said, smiling.

He looked uncomfortable, fidgeting with his fingers.

“I just wanted to tell you that you don’t have to be embarrassed about what happened at the party. Let’s forget about it. It’s for the best, anyway.”

Jace looked conflicted, breathing heavily.

“You should give her a chance. She seems to like you. See you later.” I gave him a small wave and turned on my heel to my next lecture, my face turning stoic.

I won’t be tricked by the third time. Not anymore.

• • •

Cameron somehow got my number and invited me to get food on campus. At first, I wanted to refuse, but why should I? Declining free food would be a crime.

We met on campus and began to chat on our way to the food truck. This wasn’t a date or anything close to it. I had high expectations when it came to dates. Either invite me to a fancy restaurant, or I’m not going anywhere.

If I spend my free time on you, I need something in return.

It turned out that Cameron was alright. He didn’t talk only about himself but also asked about my hobbies. He listened to me intently and laughed when I made a joke.

He was actually a nice guy.

“Aren’t you cold?” He asked me as I was hugging myself.

“A bit,” I laughed. “The food will warm me up.”

He grabbed my hands and looked into my eyes. “Can I warm you up?”

I nodded, and he put my hands into his hoodie.

I liked men who knew how to flirt without being creepy.

He put his arms around me as he pulled me closer, rubbing my back. The feeling of it was nice, but something was missing, and I had no clue what.

I enjoyed his warmth as much as I could because the next thing I heard were the voices of my friends drawing closer.

“Oh, there you are!” Aury said teasingly behind me, and every possible curse that existed echoed in my mind.

I looked over my shoulder, and my heart skipped a beat.

Why is he with them???

They all stared at me, smirking, but Jace looked in pain.

Why the hell does he look at me like that? What is his problem?

“Hey y’all.” Cameron greeted them, still holding me tight.

“I hope we aren’t interrupting you,” Emery said.

“Of course not. Join us to eat.” Cameron replied.

I met Aury’s eyes for a moment. She badly wanted to know what the fuck I was doing with Cameron.

The problem was, I didn’t know. My head was in chaos.

Cameron let go of my back and shifted his hand to my waist. At the same moment, I glanced at Jace and caught him frowning.

I wanted to press him against a wall and make him spill what he was frowning about. Was he judging me?

We walked to the food truck together, and I wished I could have some excuse to leave.

We ordered food, standing in a circle. Cameron shifted behind me and hugged me while he was smoking.

I didn’t mind physical contact. I loved it, even if I didn’t know him well.

I tried to look everywhere but at Jace. At the ground, trees, rocks, and at my best friends chatting, but I still sensed his piercing eyes on me.

I had to suppress my anger, not lash out at him. I couldn’t make a scene in front of everyone.

“Give me the cigarette.” I plucked it from his fingers and took a drag. I immediately broke into a cough.

Cameron chuckled, shaking his head. “You don’t smoke, do you?”

“No, I don’t. Here, take it back.”

Yumei told me she smoked because it calmed her down, but I almost choked. My fault, though. I can’t smoke. I can only drink.

Drown in vodka and wine. That’s what I’m good at.

After we had eaten our food, Cameron returned to his room because he had an early presentation tomorrow.

He didn’t kiss me when he was leaving, only caressed my hair.

We hurried back to the dorms as the cold intensified. Aurellia and Jade deliberately pulled Emery ahead, clearly intent on leaving Jace alone with me.

They did me a huge favor.

I kept walking straight, my chin high, neither slowing nor speeding up.

“F-Freya,” Jace called after me.

“What is it?” I asked, looking over my shoulder.

Jace drew closer, breathing quickly, his knuckles white from how hard he squeezed his fists.

“I like Cameron. He’s a good guy, don’t you think?” I said, smiling.

“No,” he whispered.

I immediately frowned. “No? Why not? You don’t even know him.”

Jace raised his eyebrows at me. And his eyes were full of rage. “And you do? Why are you letting him touch you like that? His hands were all over you.”

I took a step back, not recognizing the guy in front of me.

“So what? If I didn’t want him to touch me, I wouldn’t let him.” My voice rose.

Jace looked at the ground, rubbing the back of his neck.

I scoffed and walked away. There was no point in having this conversation with him.

“Freya.” He called again, following me.

I walked inside the dorm building. “I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you have to stop playing with people.”

“Are you dating him? Do you like him?”

He completely ignored what I was saying.

“Why should I tell you anything about it?” I sneered, filled with anger.

“I don’t want you to like him. Please, don’t .”

I halted, staring at the end of the hall. I’m over this.

I spun and marched towards Jace, grabbing him by his throat and slamming him against the wall.

“You don’t want to? Tell me why, Jace. Speak!” I whisper-shouted, holding him tight.

He was shaking, looking at my lips. I still had my lip gloss on.

“You’re only brave when you drink. Otherwise, you’re a fucking coward .” I whispered, and my gaze dropped to his lips as well.

He began to blink quickly, his chest rapidly rising up and down.

The hall was dark, as it was only lit by a motion sensor light. No one was there. No one at all.

I squeezed his throat, and he quietly moaned while looking into my eyes.

My pussy throbbed, and my lips parted. I wanted to fuck him against this wall. Ruin his innocence. Taint him with me.

“Moan a little more, pretty boy.” I connected our lips, and another moan spilled from his mouth. He was shivering even more, reaching for my lips.

I shoved him against the wall again, switching from kissing his top lip to his bottom one.

My other hand was attached to his neck, digging my nails into his skin. He was so desperate for my touch, for my lips.

I wanted him all to myself.

I didn’t care how wrong it was or that I wasn’t good for him, that he deserved someone better. I couldn’t think rationally when he was moaning into my lips, pressing himself against me.

I didn’t have the will to push him away.

We kept kissing more and more, our mouths wet and tired, but we couldn’t stop. Not until I had to take a breath.

Jace leaned into my neck, panting, his hands on my waist.

“F-Freya.” He whispered into my ear, and his voice felt like a hand between my legs.

I looked at him, trying to see what kind of face he was making in the dark.

But it all ended very soon as we heard a couple of voices in the hall. Both of us awkwardly headed in the opposite direction to our dorms.

As I was going to round my hall, I paused and looked over my shoulder, seeing Jace staring back at me, now in light.

His lips were red.

Smirking, I continued walking, proud of my work.

⸻⸻

chapter 13︱courage

Jace’s pov

Looking at myself in the mirror was horrifying. I was a mess.

I washed my face with cold water and brushed my tangled hair. I put on black slacks and a gray sweatshirt and headed to class.

I wasn’t prepared to see Freya so soon. I was embarrassed that I couldn’t express myself better at the birthday party.

I wanted to tell her so many things. About how I liked her from the first moment we met. She was like me when I was younger. I could see myself in her-my past self.

I was obsessed with her curly hair. She was the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. Every time I thought of her, my heart pulsed harder, and my chest hurt.

But I was not as confident as she was.

Instead of talking to her, I became nervous. It was difficult to even look at her without my heart collapsing.

The truth was, I was scared of how she made me feel.

It was too foreign. It was like traveling to a different country without speaking their language, without knowing anything about their culture.

I couldn’t stop searching for her in the halls and on campus. Whenever I saw curls in the distance, a smile bloomed on my lips, only to fade just as fast when the person turned and she wasn’t there.

Emery tried to get me to tag along everywhere the girls went. At first, I wanted to tell her not to do it. I wasn’t used to hanging out with girls, but the thought of being so close to Freya was too strong for me to refuse.

I was like a tick to them, but they never complained. Even when I was usually quiet, they didn’t make me feel left out, and I was happy about it.

I peeked inside before I entered the lecture hall, sweat already on my forehead. I ascended the stairs, knowing that Freya was sitting in the higher row with Jade.

I glanced up, and Jade was waving at me, wanting me to sit in front of them like I always did. I managed a quick smile, then slipped into a seat in the lower row beside the girl I had an assignment with in my next class.

She began to ask me some questions about the assignment, and I did the same.

During the lecture, my leg wouldn’t stop bouncing, and I kept checking the time instead of listening.

Every few minutes, I caught my focus drifting and had to pull it back to the professor’s voice, because my head always wandered to the birthday party.

I was a coward.

I didn’t have the courage to be upfront with my feelings, yet I couldn’t fathom the idea of Freya being with someone else.

I was selfish to the bone.

When the lecture finally ended, I took a deep breath because I knew Freya wasn’t in my next class.

We moved through the hall unhurriedly when someone called out my name.

My heart immediately skipped a beat.

I turned around, and my eyes grew wide. Freya went after me.

“I need to talk to you.” She said, her gaze flicking over Jenna. “Alone.”

I kept my eyes on her as Jenna walked away.

“Made a new friend? She’s pretty,” Freya said, smiling.

“She wasn’t my friend” , I wanted to tell her. She wasn’t anything to me.

“I just wanted to tell you that you don’t have to be embarrassed about what happened at the party. Let’s forget about it. It’s for the best, anyway.”

I could never forget that night when we danced together, when I touched her dress and her skin, and when I breathed her scent and remembered it before I fell asleep.

“You should give her a chance. She seems to like you. See you later.” She waved and walked away from me nonchalantly.

I wanted to run after her and tell her I didn’t care if Jenna liked me. Many girls kept staring and whispering about me. I didn’t care about any of them.

Not when she existed.

• • •

Around eight o’clock, my phone began to buzz. It was Emery.

“What are you doing? Don’t tell me you’re still studying.”

I smiled. “No, I’m done for today.”

“Great, because we’re going to get food and you’re coming with us.”

I exhaled. “W-With everyone?”

“Well, not everyone. Freya isn’t in her dorm. She left a long time ago.”

A couple of seconds passed before I could ask the question. “Where did she go?”

“Hmm, I think she’s out with Cameron. Aury saw them outside, heading to the food truck.”

Cold washed over me, and the wave of anxiety settled in my stomach. Why would she go outside with Cameron? Did she like him that much? What was so good about him?

“Hello? Are you still there?” Emery’s voice tore me from my reverie.

“I’ll meet you outside,” I replied, my body getting hotter.

“I knew you’d want to come! See you there.” She hung up, and I put on a random jacket, rushing out of the room.

We all met on campus, and it was a pretty chilly evening. But at least the cold calmed my body.

“Do you think that Freya starts dating Cameron? She didn’t date anyone for a long time.” Emery said as we walked across the campus.

“Cameron is a nice guy. I know him well, but I don’t see them together.” Jade glanced at me.

“I agree. He’s just not the right one.” Aurellia chimed in, looking at me as well.

Their stares only made my nerves tighten. Listening to them talk about Freya did nothing to help-if anything, it sparked something unfamiliar in me. Anger.

I wanted to know why she wasn’t dating anyone. What was stopping her?

It was once we reached them that the sadness took over the anger in my body. I felt so helpless to see Cameron hold Freya by her waist, hugging her as if she belonged to him. I wanted to scream and shout, but I had no right to do that.

At least Cameron had the courage that I didn’t have.

I clenched my jaw and pushed back the tears.

“Hey y’all.” Cameron greeted us.

“I hope we aren’t interrupting you,” Emery said.

“Of course not. Join us to eat.” Cameron replied.

The girls ordered food, and I couldn’t keep my eyes away from her. Cameron was hugging her from behind, and I just wanted to shove him to the ground.

The food was good, but I lost my appetite. My heart was drumming against my chest so loudly, I thought I’d faint.

For a moment, I imagined myself as Cameron, touching her stomach, leaning my chin on top of her head.

I’m so pathetic.

After we ate, Cameron had to go somewhere, and I felt relieved. I couldn’t stand to watch him as he carelessly touched her.

For some reason, Jade and Aurellia shoved Emery ahead of us, wrapping her in a tight hug as they dragged her into the building.

Freya and I were finally alone.

This is my chance.

“F-Freya,” I called after her.

“What is it?” She asked, frowning at me over her shoulder.

I walked closer, trying to initiate a conversation; however, Freya was quicker than I was.

“I like Cameron. He’s a good guy, don’t you think?” She asked, smiling.

“No,” I whispered without hesitation.

“No? Why not? You don’t even know him.”

“And you do?” My voice was harsh, full of fury. “Why are you letting him touch you like that? His hands were all over you.”

She took a step back, staring at me as if she didn’t know me. “So what? If I didn’t want him to touch me, I wouldn’t let him.”

I looked at the ground, rubbing my neck, not knowing what to say.

Freya scoffed and walked away, and the more she distanced herself from me, the more I felt like I was falling off a cliff.

“Freya.” I followed after her.

She entered the building, whispering, “I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you have to stop playing with people.”

“Are you dating him? Do you like him?” I burst out.

“Why should I tell you anything about it?”

“I don’t want you to like him. Please , don’t.” I suppressed my angry tears.

Freya suddenly halted and spun towards me. She grabbed me by my throat and slammed me against the cold wall. I could only focus on her soft fingers on my skin.

“You don’t want to? Tell me why, Jace. Speak!” She shouted, holding me tight.

I looked at her lips; they were pink and glossy, and they looked so kissable.

Just one taste. One.

“You’re only brave when you drink. Otherwise, you’re a fucking coward.” She whispered, but it sounded like she was spitting the words at me.

She squeezed my throat, and I unintentionally moaned.

“Moan a little more, pretty boy.” She smashed her lips against mine, and I moaned again, aching between my legs.

I’ve never kissed anyone before, but I let my body work on its own. I kept reaching for her mouth, for her body to touch mine. I was craving it. For every light brush.

We kissed like there was no tomorrow, and with guilt, I wished there wasn’t, because I knew this was a fairytale. How could someone like her, like me? A guy who can’t even speak.

We were gasping for air after kissing for so long. I leaned into her neck, smelling her perfume. I wanted to stay like this forever. So close to her.

My hand shifted to her waist, shaking. “F-Freya,” I whispered into her ear, and she sighed.

I didn’t want her to leave my embrace. Just the thought of it made me panic internally.

I nuzzled into her neck, wanting to kiss her shoulder so bad, my knees almost gave under me.

As soon as I heard people talking, I squeezed my eyes in disappointment. Freya looked at me even though we couldn’t see each other that well in the dark, and we both understood we had to leave.

On my way to my room, I was still panting, thinking of Freya’s hand around my throat.

I’d get on my knees and beg her to do it again if I had the chance.

I burst into my room, noticing my roommate wasn’t there. It was still too early to sleep. He must’ve been outside.

I threw my jacket on the floor and stripped off my T-shirt. I crashed into my chair and leaned against it.

No matter how hard I tried to ignore the erection between my legs, I couldn’t hold myself back.

I unzipped my jeans and slipped my hand inside my underwear. I merely touched myself, and I shuddered.

“O-Oh God-” I enveloped my fingers around my length and thrust my hips forward.

I slapped my mouth, not letting any sounds that I was making be heard.

I slowly kept thrusting into my hand, grimacing in agony as I wished for the release.

I imagined Freya, her thighs, her lips, and how she smelled, and I grew even harder.

I wish she were mine.

No other man should touch her. To kiss her.

Only me.

Only I can worship her.

I rocked my hips, feeling the orgasm coming. I closed my eyes and let my need take over me, squeezing my dick so hard that it hurt.

With frantic thrusts, I came like never before, shaking, moaning, and thrashing in the chair.

My cum spilled over my stomach, and I felt weird. Bad. Like what I did was wrong.

But I couldn’t help myself.

After the release, I was breathing quickly. I knew I had to clean myself up before my roommate would return, but for several minutes, I was thinking about Freya again.

I needed Freya Everson like I needed water.

⸻⸻

chapter 14︱friends

Going shopping with Emery is the most dangerous thing you can do.

That girl doesn’t know when to stop spending money, but if I were as rich as she is, I’d probably be like her, too.

Aury and Jade spent their afternoon with their boyfriends, and we were once again reminded how single we were.

“We should finally be in a relationship, Freya. Look at our friends. They’re so happy in love. Don’t you crave that?” Emery said as we entered her favorite boutique.

“Love means pain. I’ve been disappointed way too many times to crave it,” I answered.

Emery brushed her fingers along the dresses hanging on display. “But don’t you wonder how it feels to be truly loved? Like in movies and books?”

I chuckled. “Everybody wants to be loved. They say love will overcome everything, but I don’t believe that.”

Emery frowned at me, pouting. “Don’t be so pessimistic. Pick what you like here. I’ll buy it for you.”

“Emery, I can’t. It’s too expensive.” I whispered, my eyes growing wide at the prices.

She waved a dismissive hand. “Pretend I’m your sugar daddy.”

I smirked at her, and the girl who passed by us gave us a strange glance.

“And what’s going on with Josh? No progress?” I asked, moving to the next aisle.

When I didn’t get a reply, I looked at Emery, who was texting someone, laughing.

“Josh?” I wondered, peeking into her phone.

She turned her phone off with a smile. “No, it’s Mason actually. We somehow became friends after we got drunk at the villa.”

I raised my eyebrows. “You like him! He’s totally your type, and he’s sexy.”

She shook her head. “We’re only friends! Mason told me he preferred to be alone. And besides, I like Josh.”

She grabbed a random white skirt and studied it.

“I’ve never seen you laugh like that when you’re talking to Josh, though,” I mumbled, walking to the register.

Emery caught up to me. “We have only recently started talking properly. I need to be with a good guy. With someone who wants me. I’m done chasing men.”

“Josh is great, but just because he’s nice doesn’t mean it will work between you two,” I argued.

Emery stopped in front of me, scowling. “As if you knew much about it. You don’t even want a relationship, Freya. But I do, and with someone who will treat me right.”

Yeah, who am I to talk? I don’t want a relationship…

r

ight?

• • •

I was lying in bed, gazing at the ceiling, thinking about what Emery had said.

When I was a little girl, I always dreamt of the prince on a white horse rescuing me from my mother.

I wanted to live in a castle with a vast garden, one I could stroll through every afternoon.

The image of it carried me through my worst days.

But as I got older, and I experienced those horrible, cheating, lying men, I let go of that desire to be in a relationship. To be in love.

A knock on my door pulled me from my clouded mind.

“Come in,” I called, glad I didn’t have to be in my head anymore.

Aurellia came inside, dressed in her boyfriend’s hoodie. It looked enormous on her.

“Did Ricky burn all your clothes?” I laughed.

She chuckled. “I’d kill him if he were to do that.”

She crashed down on my bed, looking at the ceiling.

“Did something happen?” I asked. It was unusual for her to lie in my bed.

“I should ask you that.” She turned to me. “You and Jace. Do you see yourself in a relationship with him?”

I sighed. “You know that I don’t do relationships. To me, they’re a burden and a waste of time.”

“You didn’t answer my question, though. Would you try with Jace?”

I looked at Aury, staring into her brown eyes. “Jace is like a kitten. It won’t work between us.”

She raised an eyebrow. “You can’t say that as if it were a fact. You need to give him a chance.”

I rolled my eyes. “And how would Emery react? She doesn’t want anyone to hurt him, and what if I do? I could never forgive myself for that. Jace is an innocent guy. Far too innocent for me.”

Aury laughed, shaking her head. “No man is innocent. Perhaps from the outside, but not from the inside. You don’t know what’s running through his head when he’s looking at you.”

She was right. I couldn’t read Jace like other men.

Was he craving me? Was he thinking about fucking me?

“You know what? You’re right. I’ll get under his skin. I need to know how he truly feels about me.” A grin spread across my face.

Suddenly, the door burst open, and Emery stood in the doorway.

“Who are we talking about?” She asked before she jumped at us.

Ouch, my ribs.

“I can’t…breathe,” Aury choked out.

“Tell me who you were talking about, and I’ll let you breathe,” she said, a smirk tugging at her lips.

“I want to see the old Jace one day again.” Emery’s words echoed in my mind.

I couldn’t be the one who would bring him back. I was barely able to care for myself. How could I be the one to fix him?

But was that even possible? Can someone shattered be the one to fix someone broken?

We all have to decide if we want to change for the better or stay hidden in the shadows of our past.

Jace should be the one to decide what he wants. He shouldn’t be forced to do this.

I won’t force him to change.

“It’s about Cameron,” I blurted out.

I felt Aury’s judgmental stare, but I couldn’t tell Emery the truth. I hated lies, and the truth always comes to the surface, but I wasn’t sure about anything anymore.

I wasn’t sure about Jace.

⸻⸻

chapter 15︱touch

I spent my evening with Cameron. He took me to a restaurant and paid for everything. We had a great time together.

But when we left the restaurant, he drove off to his friend’s flat. At first, I wanted to hook up with him. It was what we both wanted, but as I sat on the couch with him beside me, his hand on my thigh, a sense of dread settled in my stomach.

I didn’t crave him or want him.

His touch didn’t make me aroused. It was the exact opposite. I found it repulsive.

I was fighting my feelings while trying to like it, but in the end, I couldn’t deceive myself.

After running to the bathroom, I told him I got my period. I wasn’t ashamed of making up such a lie. He wasn’t embarrassed either. He understood.

When I came back, he pressed his lips to mine, fingers threading through my hair. As he was biting my lips, I pictured Jace instead-and a shiver ran through me. With every pull of my lips and every touch of his hand, I felt myself getting more soaked.

It was after I opened my eyes that I realized it was Cameron who was kissing me, and not Jace.

My body went still at that moment.

I tried to play it cool for the rest of the evening, and when I finally got back to my dorm, I had to call my father to hear his voice. That always calmed me down.

“Are you doing well, sweetheart?” he asked.

My hand was shaking. “Yeah, the school is alright. I’m fine. And you?”

He sighed. “Fine as well. Thankfully, your mother has stopped harassing us. Life is better.”

We talked for another ten minutes, catching up on our lives.

I badly wanted to ask him for advice, but I didn’t want him to know about Jace. He knew I wasn’t into relationships, and maybe it wasn’t just because I’d always ended up heartbroken-it also had a lot to do with the way my parents’ relationship had been.

I was terrified of becoming like my mother, turning into something so heartless and rotten.

Was I really unlovable? Was I only good for hook-ups and nothing more meaningful?

• • •

The next day, after sleeping until lunchtime, I put on leggings and a tank top before heading to my dance class.

I didn’t feel like dancing, but I needed a distraction. And only dancing could pull me from my head that swirled with too many complicated thoughts.

Opening my closet, I grabbed the jacket Jace gave me so I could return it to him. It hung there for I don’t know how long, taking up space I needed.

I stuffed the jacket inside my bag and headed to the dance studio.

I hugged myself tighter as the cold breeze swept over me. I watched the couple that was walking in front of me. They held each other’s hands, their bodies clinging together.

I was a little envious of them. Maybe I did want to have someone special, too, after all. To have someone hold my hand in the cold and tell me they’d keep me warm.

I took a deep breath, and looked away.

Before I walked inside the studio, I put on a smile. I didn’t want to be questioned. I only wanted to move my body to the rhythm of the music.

We danced and danced until I couldn’t feel my legs. I didn’t sense pain, though. It took a lot for me to feel it after everything I’ve been through.

Dahlia opened a bottle of wine, and we got a bit tipsy. I craved alcohol because I missed the feeling of weightlessness.

We drank most of it but kept dancing anyway. Hours passed by, and darkness had already fallen outside.

When we got too exhausted, we sank to the floor, sitting in a circle and laughing as if time didn’t exist.

“Freya, someone saw you with Cameron. Are you two dating?” Anna asked.

I half smiled, taking a sip from the bottle. “Maybe, maybe not.”

Anna shook her head.

“Don’t tease us!” Leah laughed. “Will Freya Everson finally be dating?”

Yumei watched me with an odd look, as if she were curious, too.

“Cameron won’t be the lucky one,” I admitted.

“Who will?” Yumei asked, staring into my eyes.

I finished the bottle and placed it on the floor. “A person with legs and arms for sure,” I smirked.

All the girls laughed except for Yumei. She merely frowned at me.

“I hope it won’t be another playboy. You’ve had enough of those.” She suddenly remarked, and the room went quiet.

What is her problem?

“That wasn’t nice…” Dahlia whispered, clearly uncomfortable.

I smiled at Yumei. It didn’t hurt me. And she wasn’t wrong. I’ve chosen a lot of morons in the past.

When the session was over, all the girls left the studio in a hurry, except for Yumei. I think it was she who sent them away.

“Freya.” She drew closer, her arms folded.

“Yes?” I wiped the sweat from my face.

“I’m sorry,” she started. “I went too far. It’s not my business who you’re dating.”

I smiled. “It’s okay. I didn’t take it to heart.”

She touched my shoulder, holding it firmly. “I just want you to be with someone who deserves you.”

I met her eyes. “And who would that be? Give me suggestions.”

She gulped and let go of my arm. “I have to go now. Don’t forget to lock the door.”

She bolted for the entrance before I could even think to stop her. She was quite fast, thanks to her long legs.

What was that about?

• • •

I stayed in the studio a bit longer, dancing to my favorite playlist.

Rihanna was blasting through the walls, making me move like never before. With every beat, my smile grew wider. I’d had too much to drink, but I didn’t care. I loved it.

I knew alcohol was ruining my health, but it was the only thing that could relieve me of my problems, besides dancing.

My eyes were closed as I brought my arms over my head, slowly swaying my hips.

That’s when I sensed someone’s eyes on me.

Not the creep again.

I glanced towards the hall and had to take a double-take.

Jace was glued to the doorway, staring at me, his hair hiding his beautiful face.

The more we stared at each other, the closer I wanted him.

I blamed the alcohol for that. Again.

I started towards him. I had enough of these pointless games.

I jerked my tank top over my head and threw it on the floor.

Jace’s gawking eyes moved to my chest. He was out of breath-shaking, but still, he couldn’t avert his gaze.

I didn’t wear a special bra, just a black lace one, but it still did the job.

When I took the final step, stopping just an inch away, he sank to the floor, his hazel eyes lifting to meet mine.

I lowered to my knees and crawled on top of him. He automatically leaned against the wall, defeated by me.

Finally.

I removed his eyeglasses, placing them gently beside us, and brushed my palm across his face.

Jace kept watching me, his face always in agony.

I was burning. I almost thought I had a fever, and it was Jace who made me feel this way.

I reached for the hook of my bra and undid it, letting it fall off my arms.

Jace panicked, straying his gaze as if it were forbidden for him to see my breasts. I caught his hand and forced it against my breast.

It was so fascinating to see his reaction. I’ve never seen a man act like this with me, as if he were scared I wouldn’t like his touch.

It took him a few seconds to look at my chest.

My nipples were hard and needy like my pussy. Jace must’ve felt it, too, because when his finger grazed my nipple, I trembled.

He glanced at me to be sure I wanted him to continue.

I half nodded.

His thumb brushed my nipple harder, and I was completely soaked between my legs.

I couldn’t take it any longer. I wanted some friction against my pussy, so I shoved Jace’s hand and positioned myself on his left thigh.

“Don’t look away.” I held his chin between my fingers. “Stare into my eyes while I’m going to rub myself against your thigh.”

His lips parted as I began to grind against him, so wet that I didn’t need foreplay or a kiss.

I put my hands on his chest and rode his thigh, moaning and enjoying the music in the background.

“Were you stalking me?” I whispered. “Were you often peeping at me while I was dancing?”

Jace was panting, the bulge in his jeans growing fast.

“Do you at night imagine me naked, riding your pretty cock, and kissing your virgin lips?” I continued with our eye contact.

I clutched his hoodie, my breath ragged. I swear I saw stars forming in my mind.

“I’d ride you like this,” I moaned. “And then lick you afterwards.”

I snatched his hand and put his two fingers into my mouth, my tongue swirling around them.

Jace whimpered, and that sent me over the edge. I opened my legs wider, feeling every single friction pulse wildly in my core.

I leaned forward and bit his lower lip, pulling on it, and then moving quicker.

I wanted him to suffer. I wanted him to confess, to tell me he wanted me to claim him.

When the wave of orgasm was near, I didn’t hold back. I was too excited to let it slow down.

I moaned and groaned lightly as the orgasm washed over me. The release was the sweetest thing I experienced in weeks. I was smiling, enjoying every single spark of it that coursed through my body.

The grip I had on Jace’s hoodie was tight, full of tension. I’d tear his clothes apart if I could.

He shuddered with me as if he experienced the same thing as I did.

Breathless, I unzipped his jeans and found his underwear fully wet.

I looked at him, his eyes shut.

“Look at me, Jace,” I said, catching my breath.

After a few seconds, his eyes opened, red and swollen. What I had thought was sweat on his face was actually his tears.

“I want you, Jace. Tell me you want me, too. Tell me I’m not imagining this.”

Jace slowly sat up, his face flushed. “I’d like to touch you. C-Can I?”

I swallowed hard and nodded.

His hands landed on my shoulders, traveling down my chest and stomach, then up to my neck, from where they buried into my hair.

“You have been on my mind since the first time I saw you at the gala event. You’re the only woman I can’t stop thinking about.” Jace whispered, drawing his face closer to mine.

I smirked and attacked his mouth, locking my arms around his neck.

He tasted of lust and desire.

Jace smiled against my lips, and we kissed for several minutes.

Once we were both out of breath, I put my bra and tank top back on. It was already too late. I had to go back to my dorm.

Jace went to the bathroom to clean himself, and I couldn’t stop smiling. It was an odd feeling. The explosion of happiness was too new, too strong; I was paranoid it had never actually happened, and it was just in my head.

When Jace returned from the bathroom, he stared at me shyly as if he didn’t see my breasts just a moment ago.

“Are you going back?” I asked, taking off my dance heels.

He blinked. “Back?”

I chuckled. “Back to work.”

He looked away, rubbing his neck. “No, I’m not. Can I go with you?”

I grabbed my bag and strolled to him. “Yeah. Let’s go.”

I locked the studio while Jace closed up the bookstore, rushing to me even though I was waiting for him.

“Oh, I have your jacket with me. I wanted to give it back to you,” I said.

He shook his head. “Keep it, please.”

I shrugged and headed down the street, Jace walking beside me. He insisted on carrying my bag, and the quiet happiness on his face made it impossible to refuse.

We walked in silence, both of us thinking about what we did tonight. It changed a lot, and I didn’t know exactly what it meant.

From time to time, we glanced at each other, and I felt like I was back in high school when I had a huge crush on my classmate, who was a football player.

The butterflies in my stomach couldn’t stop tickling me.

• • •

As we reached campus, Jace stopped beside the same tree I had pinned him against before.

Abruptly, he turned to me and, with shaky fingers, pushed his eyeglasses to the top of his head.

“Can I have your phone number?” he asked, and his eyes sparkled. It was probably due to the lamp, but still, it made me nervous. That dangerous look of his.

I gave him my number and watched as he fumbled for the pocket of his jeans, trying to put his phone away

I suppressed a laugh.

“Can I walk you to the dorm every time you finish your dance class?”

I took a deep breath. “You may.”

He took a step toward me, staring into my eyes. “And can I be your boyfriend from now on?”

Time seemed to stop, and I only heard the sound of my pulsing heart. The breeze swept Jace’s long hair from his face, and I almost thought I saw an angel standing in front of me.

He grabbed my jacket like a little kid clinging to his mother in a grocery store.

My heart skipped a beat.

I smirked and put my hand on his chest, his heart drumming on my fingers. “You’re only mine, pretty boy.”

⸻⸻

Hii

, just wanted to tell you that I have a

Goodreads

account, so you can add this story to your shelf. Also, the ebook version is now available for purchase. Link in my bio.

chapter 16︱second thoughts

I checked my phone every two minutes, but still no message came.

I had been waiting for Jace’s message since yesterday, after I gave him my number. It was already lunch, and I hadn’t even seen him yet.

It almost felt like he was hiding from me, but why would he do that?

No, I’m overthinking this. He couldn’t change his mind.

Or…?

I sighed, darting through the school hallway, my head ducked down. I was wearing my favorite milky cashmere sweater and a black mini skirt.

I often dissociated when I was alone, and this time I didn’t notice anything or anyone, just the clear path in front of me.

I was hungry and pissed off.

Because of the excitement from yesterday, I didn’t eat breakfast. New things evoked something strange within me. I couldn’t keep still no matter how hard I tried. I didn’t sleep much at night. That’s what made me even more miserable.

Suddenly, a gasp reached my ear as I collided with someone’s chest.

“Fuck-” I looked up and immediately frowned.

“Hey.” Jace greeted me with his cute smile, completely unaware of how oblivious he seemed.

The frown between my eyebrows deepened.

He took a step back, blinking. “H-How are you?”

There are too many people here to make a scene. Just breathe. Just breathe.

“Are you hungry?” He asked, his eyes big and shining with expectations.

I closed the distance between us and narrowed my eyes. “Are you taking me out to eat?”

Jace frantically nodded and turned slowly towards the exit. He waited for me until I moved to join him.

The entire walk to Jace’s mysterious place passed without a single word between us. I sensed his gaze on me, but I ignored it-just as he seemed to ignore me .

When we crossed the street to the new pizza place they had opened, my stomach growled. Jace opened the door for me, and I gave him a side glance as I strode inside.

I sat down in the corner of the restaurant while he ordered pizza. He didn’t ask me which one I wanted, but it’s not like I cared. I was starving.

When he was done ordering, he sat opposite me, looking nervous. His leg was bouncing, and his fingers were fidgeting.

I took a deep breath and shifted to the chair next to him. “Are you having second thoughts?” I asked, my voice stern.

He gulped, looking at me through his long eyelashes.

I touched his hand that was resting on the table, and he shuddered, leaning closer to me with a painful expression.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

The waiter arrived with the pizza, and we both pulled away from each other.

We thanked him, and when I saw what Jace had ordered, I froze.

It was my favorite-topped with olives.

Only Emery and I ate it because the others hated olives.

I glanced at Jace, who was still gazing at me with this weird, longing look that made me lose my goddamn mind.

“How did you know this is my favorite pizza?” I wondered and took a slice.

“From Jade,” he answered shyly.

I nodded as it made sense, and we both started to eat.

The pizza was delicious, though even that word couldn’t describe it properly.

I was in heaven.

“Freya.”

I swallowed and met Jace’s eyes.

“Did I do something?” he asked softly. “You’ve been frowning at me ever since you saw me today.”

I wiped my lips with a tissue before I spoke. “You still didn’t answer my question about whether you’re having second thoughts.”

“No, I knew this restaurant was good.” He answered, staring into my eyes like an arrow locked on its target.

For a moment, I thought I asked him something completely different because his answer didn’t match what I was asking him.

“I didn’t mean pizza, Jace. I meant us. If you’re not sure about… me,” I said, and he looked like I had slapped him.

We sat in silence for what felt like forever. Jace kept staring at me, and I was more furious than before.

“Well?” My fingers curled into fists. “Do you think this is a mistake?”

Jace reached for my sweater sleeve and grabbed onto it. “No,” he replied. “Never.”

I exhaled. “Then why are you ignoring me? Isn’t talking to each other important when we’re dating?”

“But we’re talking now?” His voice shook. “I could never ignore you. Anyone else, yes, but not you. Why do you think I’m ignoring you?”

I grabbed his hand and squeezed it. “Because I gave you my number and you didn’t text me or call me. Isn’t that why you asked for it in the first place?”

He froze, blinking at me.

What’s going on with me? Why am I so much like my mother right now?

I took a deep breath and let go of his hand.

“I’m sorry. Maybe I need to calm down outside,” I said as I was getting up, but Jace’s hand around my wrist stopped me from moving further.

“Don’t go,” his soft voice said. “I want to spend time with you. Stay with me.”

After a few seconds, I sat back down, and he still held my wrist.

“I know I suck at talking, but I’ll be an open book with you.” He began, his skin comforting. “You make me nervous, Freya.” He brought my hand to his chest, and when I felt how quickly his heart was beating, my eyes grew wide.

“I-I wanted to text you, but every message sounded… stupid. I don’t know. Now I’m the one who sounds stupid.” He covered his eyes with his palm.

I didn’t know why, but it made me happy that he cared about such trivial things because of me.

“No, you don’t,” I pushed his hand down. “We will figure this shit out together. I don’t know how this works either.” I laughed.

We still didn’t know much about each other, but we had time to change that.

Jace gazed at me with his big eyes, and I felt like I was drowning in them.

He always looked at me this way.

“Can I hold your hand?” he asked, unsure.

I smirked. “You can do anything you want. Touch me, hold me, kiss me, and-” I drew closer. “Fuck me.”

Jace’s eyes darted around nervously, and my smirk slowly widened.

“You do want to fuck me, right?” My lips brushed his red ear.

He let out a ragged breath as I touched his thigh.

“You’re so cute,” I laughed and drew back, holding his hand.

I ate a couple more slices of the pizza and fed some to Jace. I guess I pushed him too far because he was very quiet the whole time.

I just couldn’t help myself.

I wanted to destroy all his innocence.

When we left the restaurant, Jace was squeezing my hand all the way back to the college, and I realized we must have looked like a couple.

I wouldn’t say we were in a proper relationship yet, but I’d agreed to let him be my boyfriend. And no matter how nonchalant I tried to act, I liked the feeling of someone holding my hand. Someone like him.

He walked on my left side near the road like a gentleman and tugged me to him when a cyclist almost ran into me.

“I’ll text you from now on.” Jace suddenly proclaimed, his cheeks flushed.

The corner of my mouth turned up. “You better do.”

He smiled, and I could stare at him for hours.

As we reached the campus, I let go of his hand. I couldn’t risk Emery seeing us. Of course, I wanted to tell her about Jace, but I was afraid of her reaction.

Jace and I were simply too different to belong together, and she wasn’t fond of someone breaking his heart, which I had no intention of doing.

We were merely trying to see if this would work. None of us knew how this would end.

Jace stared at my free hand with a puzzled look. I chuckled.

“Emery doesn’t know about us. I don’t want her to find out like this. I’ll tell her the news myself,” I said.

Jace nodded, looking into my eyes.

“Oh my,” I said, pinching his cheeks. “You’re so adorable.” I leaned closer and kissed his lips.

He stared at me, completely startled, but couldn’t say a thing because I was already on my way to my next class.

I liked teasing men, but I was obsessed with messing with Jace.

I couldn’t stop smiling. I finally felt a sliver of true happiness.

⸻⸻

chapter 17︱sneaking

Isabel from my business class once asked me to go out with her boyfriend after she found out he was cheating on her. She wanted me to humiliate him, so I did.

I told him that I liked going to a strip club with the guys I hooked up with, since it made me more aroused.

Without complaints, he agreed to it. He was excited about fucking me with naked girls all around him.

What he didn’t know was that I was crazy.

Once we arrived at the strip club, I drugged him, and instead of female strippers, sexy gay guys showed up.

Isabel gave me a lot of money for my plan, so I paid them quite a lot.

When I left the strip club, I passed by the older couple who had horrified expressions on their faces.

It must’ve angered them to see their Catholic son kissing men, but that was the price he had to pay for cheating on Isabel.

I think I awakened something in him. He should’ve been grateful.

I only agreed to do it because I liked torturing men, and also because Isabel was in debt to me.

And the day of her paying it back had come.

I wanted to sneak into Jace’s dorm, but I needed his roommate gone, so when he was in the cafeteria, Isabel approached him. She told him she’d love to get a drink with him.

Jace’s roommate agreed, and when the evening came, they went out.

Another plus? Jace’s roommate was Isabel’s type.

Conveniently, Jade was out with her boyfriend as I changed into a Victoria’s Secret purple lace corset bra, matching panties, and a garter belt with black stockings.

Before leaving my room, I slipped on Jace’s jacket and pulled the hood low over my head so no one would recognize me. A mask covered half of my face, and my hair was completely tucked away.

He had no clue I was about to make his evening more pleasant with my presence.

Piece by piece, I’d shatter his innocence.

Keeping it quiet, I hurried to the opposite side of the dorm, lingering in the shadows and waiting for someone I recognized to pass.

When I reached Jace’s floor, I rushed to his door and knocked far too many times. I didn’t want to get caught and thrown out of the dorm.

But the thrill of it made me even more excited.

A few moments later, Jace opened the door, and I burst in before he could even open it fully.

I turned to him and laughed as he was gawking at me.

“Surprise!” I whisper-shouted, my hands in the air.

“W-What are you doing here?” he asked, closing the door and leaning against it, shock clouding his features.

As soon as I removed the jacket and the mask, I was able to breathe freely again.

“I don’t bite. Come here,” I stretched my arms toward him.

He gulped and slowly emerged from the door. It almost looked like he was scared I’d attack him. Not that it wasn’t a possibility.

When he was within my reach, I grabbed his arms and yanked him into my arms. I ran my hand along his back, holding him tightly. He smelled fresh from the shower, his hair still slightly damp.

It gave me this warm, fuzzy feeling.

“Jace, hug me back, or I’ll kick you,” I whispered, and his hands immediately enveloped me.

His heart hammered against mine, and I couldn’t help but smirk.

“We have a few hours alone,” I said and pulled back. “We should use it well.”

Jace stepped aside and gestured toward his desk, where a gaming computer sat beside several neatly stacked books.

His desk was clean and organized. It said a lot about the kind of person he was.

“Let’s play a game,” Jace announced and sat behind his desk. “You can take my roommate’s chair.”

I smiled as he turned the computer on, and I moved beside him.

“I have a better idea,” I teased and sat down on his lap.

Jace went completely still while the game loaded on the screen.

“I know this game! Jade talked about it.”

It was a zombie survival game. You had to shoot them before they got close enough to bite, or you’d end up infected.

“Is this the kind of game you like to play?” I asked, leaning against his chest.

“Why?” His hot breath tickled my ear. “You thought I was playing kids’ games?”

“No. You look completely innocent, but I know that deep inside.” I tilted my head to look at him. “You are not.”

He was looking at my mouth, his cheeks slightly red. “Really?” he gulped. “I look like that?”

My heartbeat quickened. “Yeah.”

As the seconds passed, the tension between us grew stronger. Just as I was about to speak, the game was fully loaded.

“So… how does this work?” I asked.

Jace leaned in behind me, his arms sliding past either side of my waist to reach the keyboard, caging me in as his fingers hovered over the keys.

My body automatically shrank.

“With this key you’re running, and with this one, you’re shooting,” Jace explained, his face next to mine.

I tried to have fewer dirty thoughts, but his dick poking my ass didn’t help it.

“Try it,” Jace urged, and I focused on the screen.

I wasn’t good at games. I actually sucked at it.

When the first zombie showed up, I missed his head, and he lunged at me.

“Fuck,” I mumbled, running away, only to be caught from behind.

Unfortunately, I died.

“Jace, I’m too stupid to play this. Can we do something else?” I sulked.

He laughed and played instead of me. He was such a showoff. He killed every single zombie that crossed his path.

“The more you play, the more skilled you become.” Jace bumped his head against mine.

The butterflies in my stomach were relentless.

Who knew that being caged in his presence would make me feel light? Like nothing mattered, only the two of us.

“I need to go to the bathroom,” I announced, and Jace pulled back.

“Oh, of course.”

I got up from his lap and went to strip off my clothes.

I told Isabel to give me as much time as possible. I intended to make every second count.

After slipping out of my clothes, I walked back toward Jace. He hadn’t noticed me because he was still completely absorbed in the game flashing across his screen.

I crept behind him, burying my fingers in his hair. He took a deep breath and stopped pressing the keys.

“Turn it off, Jace. Focus on me,” I whispered, and he obeyed my command.

Gradually, I rotated his chair, and as soon as he saw me, he shielded his eyes with his palms.

I sighed. “Don’t you want to see me? I dressed up like this only for you.”

After a while, he peeked through his parted fingers, looking at me up and down. His eyes especially hovered on the garter belts and straps.

I smiled and bent over him, holding myself by the chair armrests, my legs spread wide.

Jace’s hands completely lowered from his face. He stared into my eyes for several beats, but his desire betrayed him, and his eyes shifted to my breasts.

Piece by piece.

“Do you like this?” I asked, my head cocked to the side.

His heavy, hot breath tickled my skin as he nodded shyly.

Moving back, I lifted myself to straddle him. I was hot and wet. If I didn’t get some sort of friction between my legs, I’d die.

“Come on,” I widened my thighs. “Do exactly what’s running through your head right now.”

Jace was staring at me with that dreamy look again, where I wasn’t sure he was truly present in the moment or not.

His pupils were large, and his breathing was ragged.

He braced himself against the armrest, smelling my neck. His nose grazed my collarbone, and a jolt of pleasure coursed through me.

He shivered as he pressed his lips to my skin.

The moment he carefully kissed me like I was his most expensive possession, I knew he liked me a little too much.

“Jace,” I murmured, enjoying his soft lips. “Let me take care of you.”

He looked at me, puzzled, but I was already sliding off his lap to the floor. I positioned myself on my knees, moving my hands across his thighs, reaching the hem of his sweatpants.

Jace took a sharp breath, watching my hands.

Slowly, I pulled the sweatpants down, immediately noticing his V-lines.

Even though he didn’t work out, his body was in good shape. Not too skinny. He looked healthy.

Once his sweatpants no longer covered his underwear, I stretched over to slip my hand inside, but Jace caught me by the wrist.

He wasn’t even looking at me. He was too shy for that.

“I want to pleasure you,” I softly said, and Jace’s grip on my wrist loosened.

“I-I’m not sure-”

“Trust me.” I cut him off and shoved his hand.

I smiled as I pulled his dick out. His length was above average. It was the perfect size.

“I can’t wait to put you into my mouth,” I shuddered, and Jace’s eyes snapped at me, screaming the word: Afraid.

Without breaking eye contact, I started to rub his length, even though he was already hard.

Every stroke made him thrust his hips forward, groaning.

I’ve never encountered a man so responsive as Jace.

I fastened my pace, Jace’s eyes dropping from my eyes to my chest to between my legs.

My thighs were pressed tightly together, pleasure pulsing in my core; it was unbearable.

I wanted him inside me. I wanted him to destroy me because behind the façade, he craved it as well.

I stopped stroking him and leaned closer to his crotch. I licked my lips, staring into his eyes as I pressed them against his tip, kissing it as I had kissed him before against the wall.

Jace gripped the armrests, arching his back.

I licked him from the base to the tip in a swift movement and swallowed him whole. I relaxed my jaw so I could take him further into my throat and sucked him.

“O-Oh my god…” Jace whispered, shaking.

I pulled him out and swallowed him again, feeling his tip at the roof of my mouth.

Jace whimpered and touched the back of my head.

I already tasted the saltiness of his precum. He wouldn’t have lasted any longer.

The urge to touch myself was strong, but I wanted to focus solely on Jace.

I pulled him out again to take a breath. “Use me, Jace. Do it.”

Once I took him whole, Jace gently fisted my hair, taking control over me, driving in and out of my mouth while trying to suppress his moans.

The walls were pretty thin here.

I knew once his thrusts became strained that he was reaching his orgasm. I licked him again, and Jace frantically pumped his dick into my throat, no longer touching my hair.

The cum exploded in my mouth with Jace’s groans, and I swallowed it all, savoring it.

I’ve never allowed men to cum into my mouth, but Jace was an exception. I wanted him everywhere inside me.

When his orgasm slowly subsided, I licked his tip so no cum would go to waste.

I raised my head as Jace had fallen back against the chair, breathing far faster than I was, his hands still secured tightly around the armrest.

I looked at his fingers, imagining them rubbing my clit, and I almost came.

I bit my lower lip, knowing I couldn’t stay here for the night.

“Freya,” Jace whispered.

I tore my eyes from his fingers.

“Yes?” I rose to my full height.

He was no longer shy about looking at me. He was openly checking me out.

Jace got up and pulled back his underwear and sweatpants.

“This was-” He bumped his forehead against mine. “Wonderful. Can we do it again, and again, and again?”

I laughed and touched his neck. “You liked it that much?”

Jace started forward, and my back bumped into the closet.

“Uhm, yeah, I did.” His fingers started to unclasp my corset bra, and my eyes grew wide.

He was breathing too quickly, his fingers working fast.

“I want to touch you, too. I want to make you feel good.” He kissed the side of my neck, his hand caressing my bare chest.

I smirked, pressing him closer, wanting him to do what he desired with me.

My thighs clenched together.

“Allow me to touch you, Freya,” Jace whispered against my skin.

“Yes. Touch me,” I murmured.

His hand shifted to my hip, and then to the hem of the garter belt.

You know the feeling when you’re so close to something, and someone takes it away?

Well, I didn’t until my phone started to ring.

Jace stopped kissing me and instead buried his face into my neck.

I named every favorite curse in my head and took deep breaths into my lungs.

Isabel gave me a signal to retreat.

“I have to go. Your roommate is coming back,” I said with bitterness.

“Ohh.” Jace pulled back, sounding disappointed. He stared into my eyes, his eyebrows knitted together.

We were both too aroused, but I couldn’t stay.

What stupid luck.

I moved out of Jace’s embrace to dress myself and grab my things.

I quickly checked my notifications.

Isabel: Chris is apparently too tired to stay longer. But he gave me his number!

I chuckled.

Before I left, I made sure no one was in the hall.

“Wait.” Jace touched my arm.

I turned to him, and he kissed my cheek in surprise.

I started running across the hall with a smile on my face, feeling like I committed a crime.

But it was all worth it.

⸻⸻

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/3f8488692ba7582ca00c9a7c5b1c51b70b1b9fca/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f43564c3878694669655936336b413d3d2d313538343433363734332e313839333465303062376437396165383931313732323736373037342e6a7067)

chapter 18︱fever

The fall break began, and we all returned home.

I missed my dad a lot, so seeing him after months was a great feeling. We hung out together, watched movies, and made lunches and dinners for three days straight.

After that, he had to go back to work, and I was all by myself. I stayed in my bedroom, which hadn’t changed over the years. It was frozen in time when I was a little girl.

I liked it this way. I didn’t want to change it.

During my free time, I cleaned my room and went through my diaries and toys because everything was stored in big boxes.

My diaries were filled with my dreams. I wanted to be a princess, a firefighter, and a dancer when I was ten years old.

Thankfully, I stuck with dancing. The other options were extremely unrealistic.

When I was done with nostalgia, I lay in my bed, covered with my favorite blanket. I was bored to death.

Because I was so attached to my friends, it was hard to be alone. Only Jade could spend days by herself without talking to anyone.

I admired her for that because I was losing my mind, and only three days had passed since fall break started.

My phone suddenly chimed with a new message.

Emery: What are you doing?

I sighed, buried deep in the blanket.

Me: Not much. Just going insane. You?

Emery: Great! What about going insane together with me? My parents are not home, and I don’t know what to do.

Emery and I lived very close to each other. She just lived on a richer street than I did.

Me: Do you have snacks?

Emery: Yup. A lot of them.

Me: A cake or a pizza?

Emery: Yes, and yes. My driver is on his way to pick you up.

I quickly got off the bed to change into something more normal than the homeless-looking clothes I was wearing. I preferred them at home, and they felt more comfortable.

Ten minutes later, a black car pulled up in front of my flat. I rushed down the stairs, where the driver was waiting to greet me. He opened the door for me, and I slipped inside with a smile on my face.

It wasn’t even noon, and my dad was usually off work by evening. I’d get back by then.

When I arrived at Emery’s house, which, by the way, was a villa, the driver opened the door for me again, and I thanked him as I walked toward the entrance.

The villa was modern. Painted white, with a black roof, a huge driveway, and an enormous fountain with

trees and bushes surrounding the property.

I always liked Emery’s house. I often imagined myself living here. Who wouldn’t?

I entered the living room and found Emery sprawled on the couch, eating candies. Her hair was in a messy low ponytail, and she was dressed in a cappuccino sweat set.

“Freya!” She exclaimed and sat up.

“You started eating without me? Bitch.” I rolled my eyes and sat down next to her on the light brown couch.

The white rug beneath my feet was soft. It probably cost more than our monthly rent.

“Here.” She put a sour candy into my mouth.

“Thanks. I feel better.” I chewed it, liking the flavor.

We watched the TV, stuffing our stomachs with unhealthy food. It was all worth it, though. I no longer felt lonely, and hanging out with Emery was always enjoyable.

We were very similar.

“By the way, what happened with the celebration party?” I asked, drinking Coke.

“It’s happening. I’m planning it all. It’s going to be my greatest work,” she said with a smirk.

I clapped. “I can’t wait. We deserve to relax.”

“Exactly.” She clinked her can with mine.

I smiled, excited. Emery’s parties were always the best. Everyone knew that.

I focused on the show Emery turned on. She often rewatched it, even though she had seen it at least a hundred times.

Half an hour later, her phone started to ring.

“Hello? Oh, really? Then I’ll be on my way. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of him. Bye!” Emery said and hung up.

“What’s going on?” I asked, licking the salt from my lips after eating chips.

Emery paused the show and sighed. “My aunt called me. I have to go over to her house because Jace caught a fever, and there is no one to take care of him.”

I almost jumped from the couch. “He’s sick?! He looked fine before.”

She frowned. “When did you see Jace?”

My stupid mouth.

“At school. I saw him from afar,” I said, and Emery shrugged.

Phew.

Yesterday, Jace called me on FaceTime. He looked healthy. Well, he was in a dark room, and I could barely see his face, but his voice sounded okay.

“Oh, well, we have to go, or my aunt will kill me.” Emery got up from the couch.

“We?” I stared at her in shock.

Emery stretched her body, groaning. “Yeah? I won’t let you go back home yet. Let’s go. “ She marched towards the front door.

I took a deep breath, knowing it’d be awkward as hell. I should’ve told her about Jace sooner. I felt like trash for lying to my friend, but it didn’t feel like the right time to confess.

Soon.

• • •

It took us twenty minutes to reach Jace’s house. Their villa looked completely different from Emery’s.

Jace’s house gave old-money vibes, with arched windows and pale stones. The backyard was rich with flowers, trees, and small ponds with swans.

We headed inside and rushed to Jace’s bedroom. I wanted to stay behind in the kitchen or living room to prepare tea for him, but Emery wanted to show me the house.

I felt like a rat in a palace. Jace and I were far too different, and I couldn’t even imagine his parents liking me.

They surely wanted him to be with someone from the same social class. They would never approve of me.

That’s how rich people are.

“Jace, it’s me. I’m coming inside, so you better not be naked.” Emery yelled and opened the door.

I peeked inside and saw him lying on his bed, his hair tousled. A cloth rested on his forehead, and his cheeks were flushed with heat.

“Oh God, are you dead?” Emery marched inside, and I suppressed a laugh.

She touched his cheek, shaking her head. “His fever is too high. We need to bring it down.”

Jace was breathing heavily, his eyes closed.

“Get your ass here, Freya. You need to watch him while I go to the kitchen,” Emery said, and Jace’s eyes opened in an instant.

He snapped his head toward me so suddenly that I flinched.

“Jace isn’t a kid. I don’t need to watch him.” I walked closer.

With a faint smile, he looked at me and put the cloth from his forehead down. His longing eyes were so cute.

“Let me bring you a cold one.” Emery snatched it from his hand and hurried downstairs.

I stepped closer to his bed, taking in the room around me. The walls were a soft brown, framed by white curtains and dominated by a massive bed. One wall was lined with white shelves stacked with books and video games. Another displayed the Lego sets he’d built, along with a few

other toys.

I could feel him watching me as I finished surveying his bedroom.

“Come closer,” he said, and I finally looked at him.

“Rather not. Emery will get back.” I stood by his bed, my arms folded under my chest.

Jace extended his hand towards me. “Please. I missed you. Let me hold your hand.”

I glanced at the door before I drew closer and let him touch me. He tightly squeezed my hand, rubbing my knuckles gently.

“When did you get sick? You sounded fine on the phone,” I asked.

“Sit,” he said, and I took a seat on the edge of his bed. “I’ve been sick ever since the fall break started. But I’m okay.”

I slapped his hand. “Okay? You’re burning, Jace.”

He completely ignored my words and grabbed my hand again. His skin was as soft as a feather, and his long, slender fingers covered my whole fist.

“Shouldn’t we go to the hospital? You don’t look the best.” I said with a serious tone.

He shook his head. “It will pass. And with you by my side, even faster.”

“Yeah, no. You need to sleep, Jace. I’ll go make you a tea.” I got up, waiting for him to release my hand, but all he did was stare at me.

He looked even prettier when he was suffering for some reason.

“Be a good boy, Jace.” I smiled at the way my words caught him off guard. He released my hand, and I headed downstairs to the kitchen.

Emery was already making tea for him.

“How is he?” she asked.

“Feverish. You should give him the cold cloth, and I’ll pour the tea.” I tapped her shoulder.

When Emery left, I let out an exhale. Jace was a clingy person, and that was dangerous.

I was still searching for the right way to tell her about us. Even Aury and Jade already knew. Keeping it from Emery didn’t feel fair.

I’ll tell her this week.

I poured the tea into a mug and headed upstairs. As I passed the doorway, Emery was lecturing Jace’s head off.

“Next time, call me! I’m your cousin, and I care a lot for you. Why are you pushing me away? And honestly, how would you care for yourself when no one is home?”

“Emery, please. My head hurts.” Jace mumbled, his eyes closed.

“As it should!” Emery raised her voice. “I just want you to let me care for you like when we were kids. To be vulnerable and tell me when you’re feeling bad.”

I thought about leaving them to their family discussion, but my feet felt rooted to the floor.

“We are not kids anymore. You care for me all the time, Em. You watch my every move in the school as if I were still a kid. But I’m not. I’m a grown man.”

I was stunned. I’ve never heard Jace speak in such a way. I almost didn’t recognize him. I guess speaking to your family was different from speaking to your girlfriend.

Or I didn’t know Jace that well at all.

“I want to help you. Is it that bad that I want you to be like before? So open to people, to new experiences,” Emery said.

“I am open to new experiences,” Jace replied. “I go drinking with your friends; I go to parties even though I’m not a big fan of it.”

Emery folded her arms. “So you hate it? You don’t like hanging out with my friends and me? I won’t buy that. You’re always eager to come! And you smile and laugh.”

Jace tossed the cloth from his forehead on the floor. “Yeah, I do.” He looked at Emery. “Because it was the only way I could be close to who made me happy.”

Emery’s hands fell beside her body. “What do you mean by that?”

The thought of Emery hating me for dating Jace flashed through my mind, and the mug in my hand tipped, hot liquid spilling over the back of my other hand.

I let go of the mug, letting it shatter into pieces as Emery and Jace shouted my name simultaneously.

I crouched down, my skin burning. I didn’t scream; I just bit my lip, swallowing the pain.

“Freya!” Jace shouted, suddenly by my side, holding my back. “Are you okay?”

I nodded, breathing heavily.

“Emery, bring a bowl of cold water. Now!”

I looked up at Emery, at her puzzled expression. Jace was touching me as we were best friends and… more.

“Emery, go,” Jace repeated sternly.

A moment later, and Emery was gone. I knew I was done for. I should’ve talked to her sooner. I should’ve told her what happened before summer.

“God, Freya. You scared me to death.” Jace grasped my wounded hand and blew air at it.

I watched his face, and all the pain seemed to disappear. He began to caress my back, and butterflies tickled my stomach.

“It’s okay. We have some cream for burns. Hopefully, you won’t need to go to a hospital,” Jace said, his eyebrows knitted together.

And at that moment, he didn’t look cute but manly. He was more of a man than every single guy in our college.

Emery appeared beside me, holding a big white bowl.

“Hurry! Get your hand inside.” She ordered.

I quickly put my hand inside and sighed.

“Better?” Jace asked, his face awfully close to mine.

I wanted to draw away from him, but Emery was blocking the way.

“Yeah, so much better,” I replied, his hand on my back like a hot brand.

• • •

I sat on the couch with my hand submerged in cold water while Emery called their family doctor to ask about both my burn and Jace’s fever.

Jace came back from the bathroom with the burn cream. He moved the bowl onto the coffee table, then sat beside me and gently dried my hand with a tissue.

“It’s going to sting.” He warned and applied the cream in a thin layer on my skin.

I groaned, squeezing my eyes. The cream at least had a cooling effect.

“All done.” He set the cream on the table and gently took my hand, blowing air on it again.

“You don’t have to do that, Jace,” I whispered, fearing Emery would see us like this, even though it was already too late to hide our relationship.

He simply looked at me with a smile. His cheeks were red, and his forehead was a bit sweaty.

Jace brushed his fingers through my hair and tucked it behind my ear. “I’m so happy you’re here. It’s the nicest present I could’ve gotten,” he softly said, taking my other hand.

I frowned. “Present?”

“It’s my birthday tomorrow,” he replied nonchalantly.

“And why didn’t you tell me?!” I exclaimed. “I have no gift prepared.”

“I don’t want a gift. You, here, it’s enough.” He drew closer as if to kiss me, but I pulled back.

Suddenly, the bedroom door opened, and Emery stepped into the living room. I pulled my hand from his and shifted a little farther away.

“So, the doctor prescribed medication for you. And about your hand, Freya, you shouldn’t cover it with anything. Let the skin breathe.” She sat opposite us in the leather chair, a slight frown on her face.

She knows.

“Did he say anything else?” Jace asked.

Emery shook her head. “You should only stay in bed and rest.”

“No, about Freya’s hand.”

The silence was suffocating, unbearable, and heavy.

“No. Only what I said.” Emery answered, staring at me.

I felt sick.

Her friendship with me meant everything. It meant more than a boyfriend. She was like a sister to me.

I checked the time on my phone, and it was already lunchtime. I didn’t want to leave that soon, but I couldn’t handle the tension between us all.

I needed to talk to her. Alone.

“Jace, shouldn’t you go to bed?” Emery spoke suddenly.

He looked at me, begging me with his eyes to convince Emery to let him stay with us.

“Yeah, if you want to get better, you should sleep.” I laughed and got up. “I have to go home now.”

Jace got up as well, staring at me, but I ignored him.

“Why?” Emery asked. “The food I ordered will be here soon. I won’t let you go anywhere .” She smiled, but I could see the anger glinting in her eyes.

“I can get-”

“Stay,” Emery said as her phone started to ring. It was probably the delivery guy.

It was my fault. I walked straight into my own trap.

⸻⸻

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/b0a7eeb769a1456d61afc037c0827b631730f5d0/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f474d7166575354596c74633231673d3d2d313538353639343335322e313839316130313538633032633832343931343037333330313031362e6a7067)

chapter 19︱deceit

We sat by the long, white-wood dining table, eating chicken wings in total silence. The food was great, but it was difficult to enjoy it when the tension was on the verge of explosion.

Jace didn’t want to go to his bedroom, so he stayed with us, unfortunately.

He was overly happy because I hadn’t left, and he didn’t care one bit that he had exposed our relationship. Or maybe he did it because it was taking me too long to confess.

But the only thing that was running through my mind was whether Emery would forgive me for lying to her.

I didn’t believe in perfect friendships. But I also didn’t support deception.

“How’s your hand?” Emery asked and broke the ice.

I smiled. “It’s okay. I’ve handled worse.”

She nodded, licking her fingers as she finished her food. “Great.”

I took a deep breath. “Jace?” He immediately looked at me. “Could you leave us alone for a few minutes? There’s something I want to discuss with Emery.”

His expectations and excitement slowly subsided from his face, but his faint smile was still there. “Sure.”

He went upstairs, and it was finally just the two of us.

“What’s going on? And I want the truth, Freya. Not a lie.”

I swallowed the bile in my throat. I was never scared of anything, but losing my friendship with Emery? That was different. I was terrified.

“I’m so sorry,” I burst out. “It wasn’t something I planned or thought would happen. It was unexpected. For both of us.”

Emery got up from the chair, its scraping sound alarming to my ears. She headed outside, and I followed her.

She walked to the ponds, staring at them.

I halted behind her, a few paces between us.

“Why did you keep this from me?” She started. “You knew that even Aury told me she was dating my brother because she didn’t want to lie to me, but you never told me anything. The way Jace reacted to your burn made me feel like I was hallucinating.”

“I know. I made a mistake, but I had my reasons.” My fingers curled into fists.

“Reasons?” She turned to me abruptly. “What reasons?”

I took a step forward. “Before, you warned me not to try something on Jace because you don’t want him to get hurt. So I was afraid you’d hate me for being with him. But I wasn’t the only one who felt this pull. Jace did, too. We can’t help it, and I know it looks strange because we have nothing in common and our personalities are far too different, but I like him. Genuinely,” I said, my heart hammering against my ribs.

Emery stared at me for several seconds before she spoke. “You know he’s a sensitive person. I don’t think he’d handle a big heartbreak, Freya. You’re too beautiful and too alluring. He’d never get over you. That’s what I’m afraid of. I’m not against your relationship. I’m just scared of what will happen if this won’t work out.”

I drew closer, and gently touched her arm. “I understand. I know what my dating past was like, but I’m tired of the hook-ups. Honestly, I don’t enjoy it anymore. Not since I met Jace. And I feel things I’ve never felt before. It’s so strong and confusing that sometimes I can’t believe it’s real, but my friendship with you matters the most. If you don’t want us together, I’ll let Jace go. I don’t want to lose you.”

Emery suddenly pulled me into a hug, squeezing me tightly. “You fool. Of course, I’d never ask you that. You look cute together. Just don’t break his heart, please. I don’t want him to become silent again. He would never recover from it.”

“I promise you, I won’t. I couldn’t do that to him,” I whispered, feeling the weight on my shoulders disappear.

“I still can’t believe that you two… like each other.”

I laughed. “Don’t worry. Me neither.”

She sighed. “Both of my best friends are dating my family members. That’s so weird.”

“You know what would be weirder? If we were pregnant.”

Emery immediately pulled back from our hug, staring at me wide-eyed.

“Just kidding,” I smirked, and she punched me on the shoulder.

• • •

We returned inside, our friendship not broken or weakened. Jace stood in the middle of the living room, staring at us.

“Why are you not in bed? Do you want your fever to go higher?” Emery scoffed, pushing him up the stairs back into his bedroom.

“But-”

“No buts! Get your ass in bed.”

My stomach hurt from laughing.

They looked like real siblings.

“Freya!” Jace yelled. “Could you come up?”

“No, Jace. I won’t let you kiss her and get her sick, too. You have all the time for that.”

My laughter disappeared.

Redness washed over Jace’s pretty face.

“What?! N-No. I won’t do that in front of you,” he said, glancing at me.

“Stop resisting me. You need to lie down.” Emery tugged at his shoulders.

“I’ll stop resisting only if Freya comes into my room. I want to talk to her,” Jace frowned.

Emery suddenly let go of him, causing him to nearly fall down the stairs.

“Alright. But keep the doors open.” She descended the stairs, tumbled onto the couch, and turned the TV on.

She has to be bipolar.

Jace smiled at me, beckoning me upstairs. The situation was too weird, but I decided to go up anyway.

Jace got into bed, and I tucked him in, pressing the back of my hand against his cheek.

“It seems your fever is lower,” I said.

He leaned into my palm, meeting my gaze. “Can’t you stay the night?”

I chuckled. “Is the fever messing with your head?”

I felt my heart skip a beat when he kissed my palm slowly.

“What do I have to do for you to stay here?” He asked, holding my wrist.

I smirked. “You’re sick. And no matter how tempting it is to stay the night with you, I can’t. I need to get back home to my dad.”

Jace groaned and closed his eyes. He looked like he hadn’t slept for days.

I couldn’t imagine what he’d do without us. Staying alone while you’re sick is probably the worst feeling in the world. It’s exactly that moment when you crave someone to stay close to you, to care for you.

But his parents were busy people, and he was an only child. That’s why he and Emery looked like siblings to me.

I brushed my fingers across his face, lingering on his eyes that needed rest.

“I won’t go anywhere until you fall asleep,” I murmured, and Jace smiled with his eyes closed.

“Yes, ma’am,” he whispered, and the tension on his face slowly vanished.

He must’ve been very exhausted because in less than ten minutes, he fell asleep.

I brushed a few strands from his eyes and returned to Emery. She was wrapped in a blanket, watching a movie.

“Is he sleeping?” She wondered as I sat beside her.

“Yeah, like a baby.”

We watched the movie and chatted a bit after it ended.

It was already five o’clock, and I decided it was time to leave. I still had to order dinner for Dad.

“My driver will take you home,” Emery said as I put on the shoes. “And thank you for coming here today.”

I straightened. “I’m happy we talked, and there are no more secrets between us. It was eating me alive.”

Emery hugged me abruptly, making me smile. No matter what would happen, our friendship had to remain the same.

• • •

During the drive to my house, I thought about what kind of food I should order for dinner. Dad wasn’t a picky eater, but I wanted him to be full. He was always working hard because of me. I’d be forever grateful for that.

As the driver turned onto my street, my phone chimed with a text message.

Kayla: Still hanging out with rich kids but having no money in your bank account? You’re so pathetic, sweetheart.

I clenched my jaw, anger spreading through every fiber of my being.

She was watching us, waiting for the right opportunity to bring us down. Crush us to dust like she did years ago.

Me: Contact me one more time, and I’ll call the police.

I blocked her number, no longer caring what she’d do.

I spent years under her control, and now that I was free, I wouldn’t let her take charge.

No more.

⸻⸻

chapter 20︱trigger

Jace’s pov

Two days later, my sickness subsided. The fever was gone, leaving only a runny nose. No one knew how I’d gotten sick-because I’d kept it to myself.

I started jogging every morning, and I also joined a gym.

When I looked at myself in the mirror, I didn’t feel good enough for Freya. I knew she always went out with better-built guys. I couldn’t compare to them.

I wanted to be manly for Freya. Not just cute. But with a body like mine, I could hardly fool myself.

The reflection in my mirror was laughing at me.

Freya had a heavenly body. She was like a goddess with the most beautiful face and curls.

And then there was me, with bleach-white hair and a skinny figure.

So, for the past few days, I have been working out. It was chilly in the morning, and I underestimated the cold. I was lightly dressed, and it was all my fault.

I didn’t regret it, though. Because I was sick, Freya came to see me.

She was sitting on my bed, caressing my skin, and breathing the same air as me.

How much I didn’t want her to leave that day. It was killing me that I wouldn’t see her until the fall break was over.

Then she texted me that she had a birthday present for me and couldn’t wait to give it to me at school.

I didn’t think twice. I asked our driver for her address, changed into blue jeans and a black hoodie, and rushed to her place.

I knew she was home because I had asked her what she was doing. She replied that she was drinking coffee and watching a show on her laptop.

I froze in front of the apartment entrance. One press of the button and she’d know I was here. My hands were slick with sweat, and I could barely swallow past the lump in my throat.

As I was about to ring the doorbell, the front door opened, so I seized the opportunity. I slipped inside, looking for her last name on the mailboxes, which they had right next to their doors.

When I finally found it on the seventh floor, I straightened my posture and pushed my eyeglasses closer to the bridge of my nose.

I gulped and raised my hand toward the door.

Just do it. Don’t be a coward.

I took a deep breath and knocked twice.

“Coming!” Freya called, and I stiffened.

For a second, I thought about running away.

The door opened slightly. I could only see Freya’s face; nothing else was visible.

“Jace!?” She exclaimed and opened the door fully.

The moment her body came into view, I took a step back. She only wore an oversized sweater and underwear. Her face was bare except for a hint of pink chapstick on her perfect lips.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, her face full of confusion.

It took me a few seconds to find my words. “I-I wanted to see you.”

“Are you feeling better?” She wondered and beckoned me inside.

I walked in and barely glanced at the hallway. There was no way I could focus on anything else with her standing right in front of me, half-naked.

“Yeah, no fever anymore,” I answered, fidgeting with my fingers.

Freya closed the door, leaning against it. I stared at the floor, not knowing what to say next.

“You asked about me?” She laughed. “That’s cute.”

Somehow, the word triggered me.

“Well,” I said, looking at her. “As your boyfriend, I should know where you live.”

She pushed off the door and walked toward me. “Of course you should.”

She spread her fingers on my chest, gazing at me with her gorgeous, honey eyes.

I knew it was way too soon to be thinking like that, but I couldn’t stop myself from picturing marrying her. Being hers forever. Devoted to her completely.

“Oh, since you’re here, I can give you my present.” She took my hand and dragged me into her bedroom.

“Sit.” She pushed me onto her bed, even though I wanted to keep standing.

I was so caught up in the battle going on inside my head that I didn’t react in time when she suddenly sat down on my lap.

“Here.” She put something into my hand, but I was merely staring at her. “I’d have given you a better gift if I had known about your birthday sooner.”

As soon as I felt the square shape in my hand, I knew what it was.

A Rubik’s Cube.

Freya put her arm around my neck, smiling. “Do you like it?”

“I love it. Thank you so much.” I looked at the Rubik’s Cube with a smile.

I solved it way too many times, but I kept that a secret. The last thing I wanted was for her to think that she had given me something useless.

Even if she gifted me a rock, I’d cherish it.

“Did you miss me?” She suddenly asked, and I lifted my gaze at her.

Her face was so close to mine, and all I wanted to do was kiss her.

“Jace, my eyes are up here.” She lifted my chin, and heat spread across my face. “You’re so sweet.” She pushed me to lie down.

Was I? Am I in her eyes only cute and sweet?

Freya lay on top of me, her face on my chest. I bit into my lower lip, feeling her body melt against mine.

A chill ran down my spine.

My hand moved towards the side of her thigh, wanting to touch it, squeeze it, bite it, and kiss it.

I was so close, yet so far from doing it.

I had the most beautiful woman on top of me, but I was too nervous to do anything.

I’m such a joke.

Freya looked at me, noticing the shift in my mood. Her eyebrows were slightly furrowed.

“Why are you so quiet?” she asked.

Because I want to show you I can be more than just cute , but

I don’t know how.

“You have a nice bedroom,” I replied, smiling, but inside, I was aching.

She hummed and suddenly kissed me, her hands tilting my face to her liking. I froze, when I felt her soft lips brushing against mine.

Her curls fell around my head, tickling me, making me feel alive, more present than ever.

As she pulled on my lip, biting it, my heart felt like it was floating out of my chest.

My hands moved on their own. I held her waist, my fingers pressed into her skin. We only pulled apart long enough to catch our breath before diving back in for another kiss, and I almost forgot how to breathe.

“Jace,” Freya murmured breathlessly, and it took me several seconds to realize I was holding the back of her neck, forcing our mouths together.

I wanted to continue, to strip her of her sweater, but I knew that would be too much. I wouldn’t be able to handle the situation from there. I’d stay still until she took the lead.

I wasn’t man enough.

She stroked my cheek with her thumb, making me feel more relaxed, but I couldn’t look into her eyes.

“Is something wrong? Do you feel sick again?” she asked softly.

Taking a deep breath, I shook my head. Even though I felt I lacked masculinity, I still wouldn’t let her go. I wanted her all to myself. I wanted to feel her soft skin against mine twenty-four hours a day.

After a couple of minutes, I opened my eyes, still unable to believe a girl like her actually wanted me.

“You know, when you’re looking at me, I feel like there’s so much you want to say and do but don’t know how.” She began. “And you should know that you’re allowed to do anything you want. You don’t have to rush, though. I’ll wait. No matter how long it’s going to take.”

Am I capable of changing for the better? Or am I doomed?

I slowly pushed myself up into a sitting position, with Freya still straddling my lap.

“Can I see you again before going back to college?” I took her hand into mine, enjoying the warmth of her body.

She smiled. “You want to see me that badly?”

“If I could, I’d never leave your side, not even for a second,” I said.

She pressed my face against her chest, holding the back of my head. I could barely breathe, but I didn’t care. I wanted to be inside her skin, flowing through her veins.

I would’ve done anything to stay that close to her every second of my life.

⸻⸻

chapter 21︱prove it

Jace invited me over to his house. Around six, his personal driver picked me up, and I couldn’t wait to spend time with him.

I told my dad I’d have a sleepover with Emery. Though I didn’t want to lie to him, I knew he would want to meet Jace once he heard about him, so I decided to avoid the situation.

It was too soon for us to meet each other’s parents.

I changed into a black strapless top, gray sweatpants, and a zip-up hoodie. I styled my hair into a bun, leaving a few curls to peek out.

The ride was relaxing, the city lights sliding past the window as I had a small chat with the driver.

Before I could even knock, the door swung open.

The second his eyes met mine, his whole expression brightened. “You’re finally here.”

He hugged me tighter than ever, nearly squeezing the life out of me. When he buried his face against my neck, a wild flutter spread through my stomach.

Not the butterflies again.

He abruptly drew back and grabbed my hand. “Are you prepared?”

I didn’t get a chance to respond. He tugged me into the living room and motioned toward the couch. I sat down, my gaze settling on the table in front of me, where a blanket was draped over something hidden underneath.

When Jace pulled the blanket away, I stared in disbelief. The table was covered in snacks and different bottles of wine, with two Lego boxes proudly displayed in the center.

I looked at Jace and froze. He was so giddy, smiling from ear to ear.

My weak heart.

“Did you think of this by yourself?” I asked and glanced at the flower Lego.

Jace poured me a glass of wine and handed it over. “Do you… do you like it?”

I took a sip and smiled. “It’s really good. You have great taste.”

Jace chuckled and moved closer, our legs pressing together. He slid his hand into mine, our fingers lacing perfectly, like two missing pieces.

His hand was sweaty and shaky, but I didn’t mind.

I drank the wine and watched him. He was staring at the Lego box, his chest moving way too quickly up and down.

I felt like we were making tiny steps forward with our relationship.

I placed the wine on the table and drew closer. I was about to bite his earlobe, but he suddenly pulled back, opening the Lego.

“L-Let’s put the Lego together,” he said, taking everything out of the box.

“Oh, right.” I picked up the other box, which contained a cute little panda instead of flowers.

After Jace finished opening everything, he switched on the TV and played random music, probably to avoid the silence lingering between us.

But I didn’t mind silence. Not with him.

While Jace was sitting on the carpet, I was on the couch. For some reason, I had a feeling he was deliberately putting distance between us.

Was I too horny for him? Most likely, yes.

“When will your parents get home?” I asked as I put the pieces together.

“Either late at night or the next day. Even though they are busy, they still manage to spend time with me. Mom says that family time is important,” he replied.

I smiled. “Your parents sound nice.”

“I want you to meet them soon, Freya.”

I met Jace’s intense gaze. “Soon. Of course.”

I wasn’t prepared to meet them. I had to buy better clothes and get my nails done. People like Jace’s parents were always put together. I didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of them.

“And I want to meet your father,” Jace added, his voice serious.

I reached for the wine again. Weren’t we moving too fast with meeting our families? Was this the right pace for our relationship?

I have no idea.

“Jace, can you help me find this part? I can’t figure it out,” I asked, smiling.

He nodded and knelt in front of my legs. The panda was in my lap, half-finished.

Jace looked up at me with his dilated pupils like a puppy. He looked… hungry.

I moved the panda from my lap onto the couch, expecting him to focus on it, but he kept his eyes on me.

After a few seconds, his gaze drifted down to my thighs. He took a deep breath before slipping off his glasses and setting them on the table a little too quickly. His hands moved to either side of my legs, and before I could react, he lowered his head into my lap.

My heart jumped out of my chest.

“I want to stay like this for a bit,” Jace murmured, nuzzling his face against my closed thighs.

My fingers curled against the edge of the couch. I was so aroused and excited, and the worst thing was that he had no clue. I felt like a pervert.

His long hair covered his face, so I brushed it aside, immediately noticing the redness in his cheeks.

I tangled my fingers in his hair, gently tugging and playing with it.

“Are you not ready yet?” Jace suddenly asked.

“Ready for what?”

He was silent for a moment. “Ready for us to be official?”

I stroked his hair and enjoyed the way he knelt before me.

Jace was right, and I didn’t want to admit it out loud. I was afraid. Afraid of people’s judgment. I wasn’t the right person for him. He needed someone smart, someone from the same social class as him.

We were so reckless, and I didn’t think about these things. Maybe it was because I didn’t believe we would work, but somehow, we did.

“Jace… do you really think we are a good match?”

In an instant, his hands clung to my lower back as if he were afraid I’d run away. “We are.”

I quickly smiled. “But will others think the same?”

He immediately raised his head, frowning at me. Before I could say anything, he crawled on top of me, making me lie down. It was the first time he was ever on top. His hands were beside my head, and he was staring into my eyes so intently I thought he’d know my every insecurity.

“I don’t care what others think. Not anymore. I know what I want, and that is you. No one else. Ever,” Jace said and gulped.

“Ever?” I chuckled. “Does that mean you want to marry me?

He sighed. “Yes. I want to be yours. Only yours.”

Commitment, such as marriage, is no joke. But he was throwing it into the air, like it weighed nothing.

“Then prove it. Do anything you want to me. Show me you aren’t afraid,” I whispered and licked my lips.

Jace’s jaw tightened, his eyes fluttering for a moment. His eyes shifted from my eyes to my lips, lingering there, before sliding down to my neck.

Slowly, he moved closer and brushed his lips against my skin. A faint tremor ran through him as he pressed another soft kiss to the side of my throat.

It continued like this-slowly, precisely, and with restraint.

He left a trail of kisses along my throat, moving beneath my jaw, while being gentle.

Even though I liked roughness, I preferred Jace’s way far more than anything else. It was comforting to know that he was careful with me, as if he didn’t want to break me.

I let him study me without my interfering. I wanted him to explore every part of my body that already belonged to him.

While he was kissing me, he unzipped my hoodie, and his hand slid to my waist.

For a moment, I thought I was in heaven. The rush of warmth and closeness enveloped me in a big hug.

Once my heart began pounding against my ribs, I gripped Jace’s shoulders and gently pushed him back, sliding my sweatpants down.

His eyes lowered, and his mouth opened slightly.

You want me, Jace. So much that it hurts.

He reached for the button on his pants and attempted to undo it with one hand.

“Let me help you,” I whispered and unbuttoned it.

Jace let out a slow exhale against my skin, and our eyes locked. His lips were pressed into a tight line, and his breathing was uneven and heavy.

“Freya.” He murmured and caressed my bare shoulder. “I can’t take it anymore. I want to make love to you.”

I immediately reached for his neck and pulled him closer, biting his lip. My free hand traveled down his stomach to his open pants.

Jace groaned and bit me back, moaning into my mouth.

Finally.

I palmed his dick, which was hard as a stone, and gently rubbed him.

Jace shivered and pressed himself harder into my palm.

“Jace? Are you home, honey?”

We both froze, staring at each other like we were in a horror movie.

“Jace?” The feminine voice called again.

No. No. No.

In a flash, Jace was on his feet, buttoning his pants. I zipped my hoodie and pulled my sweatpants up.

Just as I got up, a woman with long blonde hair walked into the living room. She was dressed like a CEO, holding what looked like the most expensive Chanel handbag.

Jace was an exact copy of her.

“Oh, I didn’t know you had company.” She laughed awkwardly and looked at me.

I bit the inside of my cheek, feeling so ashamed. This isn’t how I imagined our first meeting.

“Hi, I’m Jace’s mom. And you are…?” She extended her hand to me.

I gave her a gentle handshake. “I’m Freya.”

She looked at Jace questionably.

“T-This is my girlfriend, Mom.”

She still held my hand, and I wanted to run away. What if she saw us?

“It’s so nice to meet you. I’m Rosalie.” She squeezed my hand with a smile.

I cleared my throat and smiled, too. “I love your hair.”

Rosalie laughed, and I cursed myself internally.

“Your hair is far prettier, Freya. I adore curls.”

Wow, she’s so kind.

“Please, don’t mind me; I just needed to pick up some things from my office.” She tapped my shoulder.

“It’s okay, Mom. You should eat something before you go,” Jace said.

Rosalie glanced at the two of us and smirked. “I’m too busy to eat right now. It has to wait until I finish work. And I hope we will meet far more often, Freya. I can’t wait to get to know you.”

She rushed up the stairs, and I let out a breath.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know she’d come.” Jace interlaced our fingers.

I shook my head. “It’s okay. Your mom is sweet.”

“She’s the best, and she likes you so much.”

A sudden flash of light startled me.

“Stupid phone,” Rosalie muttered from behind the wall.

“Mom, what are you doing?” Jace asked.

She stepped out grinning. “I just had to get a picture of you two. You’re so cute, I couldn’t resist! But I’m off now. Bye!”

I didn’t even have time to say goodbye because she ran away so quickly.

Jace sighed and chuckled. “We should finish the Lego and then eat. What do you say?”

I nodded. “Alright, pretty boy.”

⸻⸻

What songs match Freya and Jace the most? Let me know!

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/4dbc5423ca9dec72184eca0ae386d2d618509112/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f69375675426e66413166666251513d3d2d313538383738363731322e3138393634396133363136643632623833363538353934333230352e6a7067)

chapter 22︱famous

Right before our first class, Jace and I had decided to meet by the coffee machine and have a little chat. Seeing him in the morning made my whole day better.

His smile. His voice. They were a drug to me.

Before him, I thought such feelings were artificial. I didn’t think anyone could prove me wrong, let alone someone who wasn’t even my type.

Maybe my true type was always Jace, and I didn’t know it because I overlooked nerdy men. That was a mistake. I know better now.

“You look so beautiful.”

Jace’s presence behind me pulled me out of my reverie. I turned to him with a smile on my face.

“I’m not wearing anything special, though,” I said, taking his hand. I was wearing an off-the-shoulder, cropped brown sweater with dark blue flare jeans. Nothing crazy or eye-catching.

Jace fixed the neckline of my sweater and kept his hand on my shoulder. “It’s not about the clothes, Freya.”

He stared into my eyes, and I was melting inside. I wanted to hug him for hours.

“Well, I know my face is pretty,” I smirked. “I take great care of it.”

Jace chuckled. “Everything about you is pretty.”

I closed the distance between us and placed my hand on his chest. “And what is your favorite part, pretty boy?”

He looked away, taking a deep breath. “Your eyes.”

“You’re so romantic.” I raised a brow. “But what about my ass and boobs? Aren’t they pretty?”

Jace’s cheeks turned ten shades redder. “D-Did you pick a coffee yet?”

“Answer me. I want to know.” My hands traveled to his neck, caressing it.

“Later, please.” His eyes returned to mine, full of panic and desire, and as quickly as they met my gaze, they lowered to my lips.

Without hesitation, I gave him a quick but sweet peck and pulled away slowly to tease him.

“What coffee do you want?” I grabbed Jace’s hand and squeezed it.

• • •

When we entered the lecture hall, I didn’t let go of his hand. I confidently ascended the stairs, ignoring the wide stares from people who knew me.

I was happy, and that’s all that mattered.

All my girlfriends were smiling at us as we reached their row.

“We saved you the spots,” Emery said, pointing to the two empty seats next to each other.

“Thanks,” I replied and sat down beside her.

“I can’t believe you have finally gotten together. It took you forever.” Aury chimed in.

Jade huffed. “People who like each other are often blind.”

I rolled my eyes. “As you and Kaiden, sweetie.”

Jade glared at me.

“So how is Freya as a girlfriend, Jace?” Aury asked.

I turned to him, expecting praise.

Jace rubbed his neck, awkwardly smiling. “Incredible,” he replied softly.

I smiled. Of course I am.

“Stop only praising her,” Jade rolled her eyes. “If you shared a room with her, you’d know how messy she is. If I didn’t clean our room, you wouldn’t even get inside.”

I scoffed. “That’s bullshit. I do clean.”

Aury arched her brow at me. “Only when you can’t find something.”

And that’s the moment my arguments went dry.

“Her silence is an answer,” Emery whispered to Jace, just as our professor entered the lecture hall, her heels clicking sharply against the floor.

• • •

When class was over, I linked my fingers with Jace’s before we started to walk down the stairs.

The girls were behind us, talking, especially Emery, who couldn’t wait for us to go to her party.

She had been preparing it for weeks.

“You’ll never forget this party. It’s far better than the last one.”

Aury chuckled. “Every time you say that, something fucked up happens. Let’s not bring bad luck.”

“I don’t believe in such things. And everything that happened was meant to be, Aury.” Emery replied teasingly.

“Period!” I said out loud and glanced at Jace.

Once we were almost at the door, someone called my name. It was Emma. She was dancing with us for a few months, until she decided to quit. She was rude and thought she was better than everyone else. Her dancing was mediocre at best. We were all glad she decided to quit on her own, even though Yumei really wanted to fight her.

Honestly, I cheered for her. Some people only learn their lesson the hard way.

“Oh, hey,” I greeted her.

She looked at Jace and then at our hands with raised eyebrows. “I see you’re finally dating. I just didn’t expect you to be with… this type of guy.”

My eyes narrowed. “And who were you expecting me to date?”

She laughed mockingly and placed her hand on Jace’s arm. “He looks like a lost puppy, but he’s kind of attractive.”

I loosened my hold on Jace’s hand and barely heard my name being shouted by my friends as I pushed Emma against the wall.

“What gives you the right to touch him, bitch?!” I glared at her, my heartbeat pulsing in my ears.

She stared at me with wide eyes, as people were forming a circle around us.

We just presented them with a new play they could laugh at.

“Touch him again, and I won’t be using words next time.” I seethed and shoved her shoulder, walking away with Jace.

“Freya!” Jade shouted. “You can’t let yourself be provoked by them.”

My nails were buried in Jace’s arm, but he didn’t say anything.

“No, Jade. If I let them talk to us this way, they’ll step over us like they step on shit. I won’t let them badmouth my boyfriend.”

We marched outside, not because we didn’t have any classes but because I needed the cold, fresh air to calm me down.

I finally stopped in my tracks when we were in the middle of the campus.

“Why can’t people just mind their business?” I sighed and hugged Jace as tight as I could.

He put his hand on my lower back and whispered, “It’s okay, Freya. You don’t have to do that for me. I’m used to it.”

I pulled away, frowning at him. “Maybe you are, but I’m not.”

“Freya, take a deep breath.” Emery cut in.

“Yeah, drink some water,” Aury added.

I looked at them like they were crazy.

“I don’t need any of that!” I burst out. “Why are you all acting this calm?!”

“Because you won’t solve anything by being angry, girl. People here are assholes. They don’t like to see others happy, and it doesn’t matter what you will say to them because they don’t care about anyone’s feelings,” Emery said.

I curled my fingers into fists. “I know, but it’s still unfair.”

I took a deep breath, and Jace hugged me from behind. My friends took that as a cue to leave.

I knew they were right, but I was still furious. Jace didn’t deserve this treatment from anyone.

“You smell nice.” He whispered, holding me tight.

I smiled, letting the anger drain from my body.

“I only care about you. Nothing else. So don’t anger yourself because of what people say,” he added.

I nodded and leaned against him, feeling him support me like a pillar. I could get used to it forever, to finally being supported by someone other than myself.

“But I can’t let them bully you, Jace. I won’t let them do that to you,” I said. “You don’t deserve it.”

Jace sighed and turned me to face him. “I can deal with it, Freya. I’m not a little kid anymore.”

I rolled my eyes. “Sure, you’re not, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do something. You can’t stay quiet, understand?”

“Alright,” he replied and pulled me against his chest again.

After that, we finally returned inside and had another class together. I was glad because I didn’t want Jace to be alone. I didn’t believe that Emma’s words hadn’t hurt him deeply.

He was an excellent actor, pretending he was fine just to keep me from turning that bitch’s face purple.

If anyone were going to ruin our relationship, it wouldn’t be the intruders-only us. Only we could end this relationship.

“By the way,” Jace whispered.

I typed the notes that I didn’t care about on my laptop. “Yeah?”

I can’t fall behind anymore.

“My mom is having a cocktail party today, and she has invited you.”

My fingers froze. Cocktail party? With all those rich people?

A shiver went down my spine.

“Oh, that’s so nice of her,” I replied with a smile. “Will you be comfortable with all those people there?”

Jace took a deep breath. “My dad will be there, too, and I want you to meet him. We can be there for an hour, and then…” He paused and glanced at my lips. “And then we will leave. What do you think?”

I have a few nice dresses to wear. It can work.

“Okay, I’ll come.”

Jace exhaled a shaky breath and nodded.

I have to look perfect.

⸻⸻

chapter 23︱black sheep

Getting ready for the cocktail party was worse than studying for the exams. I didn’t know what to do with my hair and make-up, and all of my heels looked lame.

Thankfully, the dress I picked was stunning in a mint-green color, with ruffled sleeves that traveled alongside my body.

As I was doing my light makeup, the doorbell rang. I hurried to the door, yanking it open.

The delivery guy looked stunned when he saw me.

“Oh, here.” He handed me the food I ordered for Dad.

“Thanks.” I gave him a quick smile and closed the door.

I placed the food on the kitchen table along with a little note, saying I wouldn’t be home for dinner.

When I was home, Dad always worried about me. In his eyes, I was still his little girl.

I finished my makeup and styled my curly hair into a bun, with multiple strands escaping it. Then I put on some random silver jewelry I had around my neck and wore the beige block heels, which I hadn’t had a chance to wear yet.

My phone buzzed with a phone call, but I ignored it and instead stared at my purses. I had a lot of them.

After every possible outfit that I created in my head, I made my choice and picked the light beige purse that matched my heels.

I finally checked my phone, seeing one missed call and a message from Jace delivered thirty seconds ago.

Jace: I’m waiting for you outside.

I bolted to my window and saw him leaning against a silver sports car, dressed in black slacks and a light blue shirt.

Quickly, I sprayed my favorite perfume all over myself and rushed downstairs.

It was cold outside, but I didn’t take a jacket with me. What I hated the most about cold weather was that when I was dressed nicely for an occasion, I had to drag the jacket with me everywhere.

As I opened the entrance door, Jace was looking heavenward, his hair tied back.

Suddenly, he looked older. Different.

It felt like there were so many sides of him no one else ever got to know, and now he was letting me see every single one of them.

“Hey.” He greeted me when he heard the door shut.

I strode toward him, noticing how elegant he looked. Up close, he was even more attractive than before.

Jace leaned off the car, and his eyes traveled up and down my figure.

“Where is your jacket?” He frowned, closing the space between us.

“It would ruin the outfit,” I replied, smirking.

Jace put his warm hands on my arms, caressing them. “Let’s get you inside. You might catch a cold.”

He guided me into the car, careful not to let my dress get caught in the door.

“Whose car is this?” I asked as he started the engine.

He first checked if I had my seatbelt on before he answered me. “It’s mine.”

A Mercedes. That’s nice.

“I thought you didn’t have a driver’s license.”

He smiled and took off. “Not until recently.”

• • •

The cocktail party was happening at Jace’s house. His mother signed a big deal with her company, so she wanted to celebrate it with everyone who worked for her.

As soon as we pulled into the driveway, it was already packed with cars. Men in tailored blazers and dress shirts, and women in dresses or elegant suits, were making their way toward the villa.

I knew I looked great, but compared to them, I was ordinary.

We walked inside after Jace found a spot to park, and were immediately greeted by Rosalie.

“You’re finally here!” She exclaimed, smiling at me.

“Hello, Mrs. Vaughn. Thank you for inviting me,” I said.

She was wearing an elegant, long white dress with the most expensive-looking flashing diamond necklace around her neck.

“Don’t thank me. I’m happy to have you in our family, Freya, and you look fantastic, sweetie.” She looked behind her shoulder, searching for someone. “I’m going to find my husband to introduce you.”

When Rosalie left, I took a deep breath, feeling like a black sheep amongst all of these rich people.

Just keep your chin high.

“Jace, can you get me a drink?”

He nodded and got lost in the crowd. I found an empty table to wait for him. All these people were twice my age, so there was no one to talk to.

“There you are.” Rosalie headed my way with her husband, who was blond as well. Both of them were very attractive and looked amazing together, like nothing could ever bring them down.

“Good evening, Mr. Vaughn.” I smiled.

He extended his hand for a handshake. “There’s no need for formalities. You belong in our family already. Call me just Scott.”

Wow. Both of them are so nice to me.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” I said, shaking his hand.

“Likewise.”

Jace appeared by my side with my drink.

“Thank you,” I murmured, placing it on the table.

There was jazz playing in the background, and the guests were talking and laughing over it.

“Can I ask how you two met?” Scott suddenly asked. “I heard you’re Emery’s friend. Am I right?”

“Yeah, we met… in school. Emery introduced us,” I replied, taking a sip of the drink.

Jace put his hand around my waist. “Dad…”

Scott rolled his eyes. “Can’t I know how my son finally found himself a girlfriend?”

Rosalie punched him in the arm. “They found each other because they were meant to be! And I can’t wait to take you shopping with me!”

I chuckled, feeling a rush of happiness. Was I really accepted into this family just like that?

“You have to excuse me for a minute,” Scott said and moved to a table in front of us, greeting what looked like his friend.

“I need to leave as well. There are so many guests I haven’t greeted yet. Enjoy the party!” Rosalie patted my hand before she left.

Jace squeezed my waist, and a burst of butterflies tickled my stomach.

“Maybe… we should go to my bedroom.” He whispered, the side of his body glued to mine.

I laughed. “We just arrived. That would be disrespectful.”

Jace sighed, clearly uncomfortable with all these people.

“Then let’s-”

I put my hand on his chest. “Jace, I’m right here. You should try to enjoy this. Only for an hour, and then we will leave.”

He looked down. “My mom usually gets too drunk and ends the party in the morning, so I can’t even get proper sleep.”

I raised my brow. “You can’t find a quiet place to sleep in this huge villa?”

Jace smiled shyly. “I’m a light sleeper. I can only fall asleep with complete silence.”

“That must sucks,” I taunted.

Jace rested his chin on my shoulder. “Yeah.” He took a deep breath and, after a few seconds, asked, “Is your apartment quiet at night?”

I frowned, and for a hot minute, I couldn’t understand what his intentions were by asking this. I guess I was too overwhelmed by the people and their laughter.

I raised my hand to his cheek. “You want to sleep in my bed tonight?”

Jace turned stoic. I couldn’t even detect his breathing.

“N-No?”

I laughed and turned to face him. “As I said, you can do and ask for anything you want.”

A waiter drifted past us with a silver tray balanced on one hand that had macaroons, salmon bites, and other tiny, expensive-looking things I wouldn’t even know how to pronounce.

My stomach had been clenched with nerves ever since we arrived, but my hunger now cut through the anxiety, compelling me to have a little bite of something.

“I’m going to get something to eat,” I murmured to Jace.

He gave a small nod, though his fingers lingered around me like he was reluctant to let go.

I slipped away, keeping my eyes on the table with fancy little dishes, shiny trays, fruit stacked way too neatly, and a chocolate fountain. I grabbed a plate and went straight for the chocolate-covered strawberries.

I took a bite, quickly licking my lips from the chocolate.

I wouldn’t mind having a fountain like this at home.

The door suddenly slammed shut, the sound slicing through the laughter and clinking glasses.

Slowly, I turned, and there she was, standing in the doorway, an old coat hanging off her shoulders. Faded sweatpants. Hair tangled and unbrushed, like she hadn’t cared in days.

Malice carved every line of her face.

Her eyes locked onto mine instantly.

I felt the blood drain from my face, cold and sudden, like someone had pulled it straight from my veins.

She stepped further in, staring at me. “Freya.”

I gulped and staggered back as I lost my balance.

Kayla’s eyes flicked over the people before she let out a bitter laugh. “You think dressing up makes you belong here? Makes you one of them?”

Her eyes were mocking and laughing at me. “You won’t even buy your mother a new coat, and now you’re pretending to belong with millionaires?”

People turned and stared.

Heat climbed my neck like fire.

Rosalie looked up from across the room, confused. Scott paused mid-handshake.

Whispers spread faster than my embarrassment, and I wished the floor would open and swallow me whole.

Kayla stepped closer, her voice cutting through the stunned silence.

“You’re embarrassing yourself, Freya. And you’re embarrassing me. Our family.”

The worst part was that she was right.

With all those eyes on me, my worth turned into dust. Whatever perfect image I created for this evening cracked open and shattered into fragments.

Jace was suddenly beside me, his hand on top of mine, gently pulling me away from the table, but my mother wasn’t finished.

She leaned towards Jace, smirking. “She’s more used up than a cheap hooker, and you’re just one of her customers, boy.”

I watched her as she laughed, a tear rolling down my cheek.

My world crumbled to dust in a single evening.

• • •

I sat on the balcony, welcoming the cold wind against my hot skin.

Both Scott and Rosalie somehow managed to keep Kayla away from me until the security escorted her out.

Still, people kept sneaking glances at me as I sat outside, curious to see if Kayla’s words had any truth to them, but Rosalie assured me that she made up a lie about Kayla being mentally unwell.

I didn’t know why she was lying to protect my dignity. I hadn’t dated Jace for years. Our relationship had only just begun.

Rose stayed with me and held my hand, telling me everything would be fine.

For a moment, I believed her.

But then I caught Jace’s gaze through the glass wall, as he stood next to his father, and I knew nothing would ever be okay.

Rosalie had deliberately kept him at a distance. She said I needed space, and she was right, but the more distance there was between us, the clearer I saw that we were from different worlds, and the fairytale Jace and I created in our heads was just the cover-up for it.

“Rose?” I wiped the tears from my cheeks.

“Yeah, honey? Do you need something?” she asked.

I sighed with a smile. “Could you bring me a glass of water, please?”

She got up from the chair. “Of course, honey. I’ll be right back.”

As soon as she left, I called my dad, sobbing.

“What’s up?” He picked up after the first beep.

I swallowed the sob lodged in my throat, my hand trembling as it gripped the phone. “P-Please pick me up. Don’t ask anything; just… come to the address I’ll send you.”

“I’m coming.” He immediately hung up, and I tossed my phone into the purse.

Before I escaped through the balcony stairs, I made sure no one from the Vaughn family could see me. Then I hurried across the driveway, my arms folded tightly under my chest.

How could I believe this would work?

I shook my head, tears running down my chin and neck.

The moment I slipped past the gate, I ducked further into the shadows, just in case someone was searching for me.

Ten minutes later, my dad’s car pulled up silently in front of me. I climbed in quickly, noticing he was still dressed in his work clothes.

“I’m so sorry you had to leave work,” I said after we were back on the road.

“I have no idea what happened or why you’re dressed like this, but I’ll start questioning you tomorrow. And you will tell me the truth.”

The rest of the ride home was silent. I turned my phone off and stared out the window.

I didn’t cry anymore.

I only felt like the dumbest woman in the entire world, who was trying to be something she could never be.

⸻⸻

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/b26f0b2160fc89c4d053af55b1161827b160a925/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f545a66486f774859554e76652d413d3d2d313539323337323733332e313839396165336436383462393230663939353732313034393731362e6a7067)

chapter 24︱pretend

I woke up very early in the morning, made myself some tea, and sat in the kitchen as if the world were coming to an end.

Dad interrogated me the moment he found me, so I spilled my secret. What was the point of hiding it from him?

“And this boy likes you?” he asked, drinking coffee.

I sighed, staring into the half-empty cup of tea. “We like each other a lot.”

“Sometimes,” he began, “Liking each other is not enough, and you should know that, Freya. Kayla and I are the example of that.”

I nodded. “I know, Dad. I don’t know where my head was, and I can’t face his parents ever again.”

His hand stretched to mine, squeezing it gently. “Love blinds us. Every tiny mistake or problem becomes invisible to you, and by the time you see through it, it’s too late.”

I couldn’t ignore the sadness in his voice. I had just revived his darkest memories.

“Don’t worry about me, Dad. I won’t make the same mistake,” I said.

We looked at each other suddenly, and all the sadness and despair vanished from his face.

“I won’t let you, Freya. For your own good, stay away from that boy. No matter how good he is, these people will always look down on you, and I won’t allow that. Not after everything you’ve been through.”

Just as I was about to say that his parents were actually nice to me, Dad’s phone began to ring.

“Hello? Oh, how are you? I’m doing great, too. Yeah, she’s with me. Give me a second.”

I raised my eyebrows at him.

“It’s Jade.” He handed me his phone.

I didn’t want to talk to anyone today, but Jade wasn’t someone who called for nothing. She usually texts because she hates phone calls.

“Jade?”

“Where the hell are you? Why are you at home?” She yelled into my ear.

“I’m sorry. I’ll explain everything when I get back.”

“Get back? Did you forget we’re leaving in an hour for the company visit? I know you don’t really care about school, but I told the professor you’re going as well.”

“For fuck’s sake, I completely forgot about that!” I slapped my forehead. I thought I had a free day because I had no classes scheduled.

I got up from the chair, going back and forth. “Listen, I’ll get ready quickly.”

“Hurry. Up.”

And just like that, she hung up on me.

I slowly turned to my dad, smiling.

He let out a long exhale, shaking his head. “I’ll be your Uber once again.”

I gave him back his phone, thanked him, and rushed to my bedroom to change into a different outfit.

• • •

In the car, I did my makeup very minimally. I had to cover the dark circles under my eyes, as I didn’t sleep the entire night.

I turned on my dad’s favorite CD, no longer caring how bad his taste in music was. I had to shift my thoughts elsewhere.

I hoped Jace wasn’t there, too. This company visit was mainly for seniors, but I could still see him when I arrived at the campus.

No. I can’t see him today, tomorrow, or the day after that. I’d rather dig my own grave and jump into it willingly than face him.

Whenever I thought of yesterday evening, I cringed, and shortly after, my stomach coiled, and whatever food was left in my stomach wanted to get out.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Dad asked as we neared the college parking lot.

I dug my nails into the handles of my bag. “Yeah, I’m a strong woman. Did you forget I have a part of you in me?”

My attempt at sounding strong and nonchalant failed. Dad gave me a side-eye, not saying anything else.

Pretending to be alright was easier than facing reality.

When the car stopped, I pushed the door open and stepped out.

“Thank you, Dad. I don’t know what I would do without you.” I smiled at him and shut the door.

I found the girls immediately. They were waiting for me in front of the bus that was supposed to take us to the chosen company. Our major was business-related.

“Where the hell have you been?” Aury almost shouted.

I put on a fake smile and hugged her tightly. “Can’t live without me?”

Jade sighed. “It’s not about that. Weren’t you supposed to return after the cocktail party?”

My smile instantly dropped.

I pulled back from Aury, meeting her questioning expression.

I turned to Jade. “Let’s talk about it later, please.”

I couldn’t ignore Emery’s stare as we headed toward the bus. It was odd that she was quiet. I guess she knows what happened.

The bus was almost full, but we still found empty seats. Emery sat down beside me, and I figured she wanted to ask me about last night.

“Jace was looking for you,” she said after a few seconds, and the bus moved forward.

I stared out of the window. “I… couldn’t speak with him.”

“Couldn’t or didn’t want to?”

I snapped my gaze at her. “I don’t know what he told you, but it was a difficult evening for me, and it’s between Jace and me to resolve it.”

Emery averted her gaze. “Remember what we talked about before?”

I would remember it even if I were lying on my deathbed.

“That I can’t break his heart,” I whispered.

• • •

The building was all glass. Modern and elegant. It reminded me of the cringy movie Fifty Shades of Grey that Aury loves so much. I mean, I understood why she liked it. Who wouldn’t want to be in a BDSM relationship with a rich CEO?

We followed the professor inside, our access cards hanging from lanyards.

The seminar hall was wide and bright. We took a seat in the middle row. Emery and Aury sat beside me, and Jade sat next to Aury.

The presenter began speaking on entrepreneurship and brand identity. Students nodded along, writing things down.

I merely listened because I learned more by focusing on what the person was saying.

It would be wonderful to work at a company like this one, but I wasn’t sure it was right for me.

I chose my major because of my dad. Because he wanted me to have a better future. But my passion was always dancing. I didn’t see myself as someone who sits behind a computer for hours.

After two hours, the workers showed us how their company operates and gave us a tour. The people working there didn’t look like they hated their job. It was the other way around. They were also nice to us and asked us a bunch of questions during their break.

“I need to go to the bathroom,” I whispered.

“Do I have to come with you? You’re a big girl, Freya,” Aury whispered back, fighting back a smile.

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, you do. Move your ass.”

Jade and Emery were chatting with the female workers, so we didn’t disturb them.

“Where are you going?” Jeremy, my classmate, asked.

I barely spared him a glance. “That’s none of your business.”

He put his hand around my shoulder, and that made me come to a halt.

“Is it true that you’re dating that guy who looks like a girl? I thought you were into men like me.” Jeremy laughed.

My eyes narrowed. “First of all, get your sweaty hand off my shoulder. And second of all, I’m not into men with a receding hairline.”

Jeremy’s smile vanished, along with his enormous ego. Just because he played hockey doesn’t mean he could get into my pants.

I have standards!

And I hate hockey players.

“Yeah, so you’d rather fuck a guy that doesn’t even look like a man.” He chuckled bitterly into my face, thinking it would offend me.

What’s up with men not handling rejections? Why do they have to be so emotional?

I shoved his hand from my shoulder and looked at him with disgust.

“Go cry to your mommy, then. I fuck whoever I fucking want,” I seethed, speaking quietly so no one from the company could hear us.

“Freya… let’s not waste our time here,” Aury cut in.

I held Jeremy’s ugly eyes in my gaze. I was tired of men like him, who get angry because things didn’t go their way.

I bit into my lip because I needed the pain to distract me.

“Let’s go,” I snarled, wanting to punch my fist through a wall.

We turned a corner, and that’s when my heart skipped a beat.

I froze on the spot, pulse slamming in my ears so loudly it drowned out everything else.

Jace was leaning against a wall, badge hanging loosely from his lanyard. His eyes lifted to mine with a shock that was like a punch in the stomach.

I held his gaze, which was full of agony and regret.

When I saw him lean off the wall, I barged into the bathroom.

“Wasn’t that Jace? Why are you running away from him?” Aury asked.

I went to the sink, staring at myself in the mirror.

“You’re embarrassing yourself, Freya. And you’re embarrassing me. Our family.”

“Fuck!” I took a deep breath and turned to Aury. “I’ll explain everything, but not now. How long have we got until the break is over?”

“Umm.” She checked the time on her phone. “Ten more minutes.”

I put on a smile. “Alright. I need to go outside for some fresh air.”

I exited the bathroom, thinking Jace was no longer there with his group.

I was wrong. He waited for me by the door.

“I-I can’t right now. I really can’t.” I stammered and pushed past him, running outside.

My tears wanted to break free.

“Freya!” Jace yelled after me, but I kept running.

I burst open the exit door, sensing him right behind me.

“Please, Jace. I don’t want to talk to you today,” I said, not stopping.

“And I won’t stop following you until you look at me.”

That’s when I paused.

Slowly, I turned to face him, and when I saw the tears in his eyes, all I wanted to do was run into his arms.

“Don’t cry or I’ll start running again,” I warned.

Jace looked up, blinking fast.

He was shaking. It was visible even from a distance.

After blinking the tears away, he looked back at me. He took a step forward, and I instinctively stepped back.

“Why… why did you leave me yesterday? I was looking for you everywhere . Called you ten times and sent you at least fifty messages.” His voice was soft and sharp at the same time.

I folded my arms under my chest. “Jace,” I started. “I embarrassed both of your parents and you. How could you even ask me such a stupid question?”

Jace rubbed the back of his neck. “Freya, what happened yesterday wasn’t your fault. You didn’t embarrass us at all. My mom was worried about you. She said you looked too pale. A-And I almost lost it because I thought something bad had happened to you.”

The last thing I wanted to do was argue with him about Kayla when it was, in fact, my fault. I should’ve gone to the police a long time ago. I just didn’t want my dad to suffer again.

“Were you eavesdropping on us?” I burst out. “In the hallway?”

Jace paled and looked away.

“How much have you heard?”

His gaze moved to mine. “Everything.”

I nodded. “Great. At least you know I wasn’t doing something shady behind your back.”

He instantly frowned. “You think I’m having doubts about you?”

I edged closer to him. “You don’t? I was sleeping with a lot of guys. Aren’t you afraid I’m not faithful to you?”

Jace’s eyes widened.

And before I could react, he was standing right in front of me, his hand holding mine.

I felt immediately safe. Home. It hurt from how good it felt.

“I’m only afraid of what he said was true.”

“About what?”

Jace squeezed my hand. “About me looking like a girl. Do I look like a girl in your eyes?”

For a moment, I wondered if I’d heard him wrong, or if I’d never actually woken up and this was just some strange dream.

“What?” I tried to pull my hand away from his, but his grip was stronger than I expected. “When did I ever give you that impression?”

“You always call me cute, so I started running, and I have a gym membership. I even thought about cutting my hair short-”

I disconnected our hands, staring at him as if we’d never met before.

“Did I ever ask you to do that?” I paused. “I never said I was unsatisfied with your masculinity, Jace. Don’t put that on me just because I call you cute. To me, you were always manly! Every time I look at you, I think to myself how lucky I am to have a boyfriend like you. Your soft side as well as the hidden one you rarely show me-I love them both equally.”

I exhaled sharply. “And now that I experienced what it’s like to be with someone like you, so full of yearning and passion, I’d never go back. Never.”

I took a step back, sorting my thoughts. I truly loved him, but like my dad said, love is not always enough.

“I like you, Jace. I like you too much, but maybe we should-”

In the blink of an eye, his arms came around me, and my face pressed into the crook of his neck. He smelled so nice that a shiver went down my spine.

“No,” he whispered and hugged me tight.

I wanted to suggest that maybe we should take a break and think things through, but I had a feeling he wouldn’t take that well.

I didn’t want to break his heart, but if being together was a mistake, it was better to end things now, even if it was the last thing I wanted.

I’d have to do something about Kayla first. I couldn’t get rid of her no matter what, and to think I’d drag Jace and his family into my problems was out of the question.

It was enough that my dad suffered because of her. I didn’t want to bring more shame to the Vaughn family. One evening was enough.

“Jace, you need time to think about whether you really want to be with someone like me. My family is broken; I’m broken. Can you really handle the burden of it?”

He was merely silent as if he were trying to find the right words.

Or he’s hesitating.

Not that I’d blame him.

“Let’s have a break for a while. It’s for the best,” I whispered and wriggled out of his hold to return inside, leaving him to his thoughts.

⸻⸻

Don’t take the school system too seriously (Google was tired of me, lol).

chapter 25︱look for you

A week had passed since I last spoke to Jace. Every time our eyes met, it looked like he wanted to cry and hug me at the same time, but I kept my distance. No matter how difficult it was to stay away from him, I reminded myself of how he answered my question with silence.

He wasn’t prepared for my toxic mother and my self-consciousness when it came to our differences in social status.

I understood his reaction. Being with someone like me wasn’t easy. I wasn’t easy.

“Earth to Freya!”

Emery was waving her hands in front of my face.

“What?” I asked.

Her eyebrows were knitted together. “You’ve been staring at the wall for ten minutes straight, and I just came to remind you that you don’t have much time left.”

I checked the time on my phone and cursed. Emery had her hair and make-up already done.

For this party, she decided to wear a black leather mini dress with high boots.

“Josh is already here to pick me up. I need to check if everything is how it’s supposed to be. You make sure the girls get there on time, too.” She flipped her long blond hair and exited my room.

I sighed and grabbed my beauty blender. I always loved to party and drink, but I wasn’t feeling it today. I only wanted to stay inside, turn on a random show, and eat ice cream.

I was too tired of pretending to be okay.

I told the girls Jace, and I hadn’t broken up, but why would we need a break if he wasn’t prepared for the burden of my family?

I stared at my unfinished makeup. “I knew I wasn’t meant to be in a relationship. It was never meant for me.”

I kept my curly hair down and grabbed my purse. I looked at myself in the mirror before I went to Aury’s dorm.

My two-piece silver glittery top and skirt, paired with matching snake wrap heels, made me look like the hottest woman in town.

A girl can be miserable and hot at the same time.

I burst into the room to find both Jade and Aury already getting ready to leave.

“Wow, you look so good,” Aury remarked.

I threw a dismissive hand. “Not as good as you two do.”

Jade smirked. “Everyone will be staring at you tonight.”

“I hope they will. I look fabulous. Especially my boobs.” I gently touched them. “But we should go before Emery kills us for being even a second late.”

• • •

On the way there, Jade and I had already gotten into a funny mood by drinking wine. It’s been a while since we last got properly drunk, and I needed the alcohol a lot more than anyone else.

Despite being with my friends all the time, I felt so fucking lonely. Like something was missing. Some very important part of me.

But the alcohol slowly filled up that space.

When we got out of the car, Aury grabbed our hands and dragged us inside the club.

Emery had reserved and decorated the entire place. She’s stubborn and always gets what she wants, so finding a huge club for herself wasn’t a problem.

The moment we stepped inside, I realized there were far more people than Emery had mentioned. She did say the party would be bigger, but it felt like the whole college had shown up.

“Damn it. She had outdone herself,” Aury murmured, looking at the colorful neon lights.

Jade was already moving her hips to the music. “I want to dance!”

I laughed, almost stumbling back when a firm chest stopped me from falling.

“Be careful,” the guy said. It was a familiar voice.

I looked over my shoulder at him. “Sorry, and thanks.”

Cameron gave me a half-nod and continued on his way to the bar with his friends.

I caught his stare after he ordered a drink, but I acted like I wasn’t aware of it at all. What good would it do if I did? I didn’t love him, nor did I want to be in a relationship with him. There was only one person I felt this strongly about.

Fuck, I can’t start thinking about him here. I need to have fun.

“I need something stronger,” I shouted.

Aury turned to me with a smile. “Agree.”

But before we could make it to the bar, Aury was shadowed by her tall-ass boyfriend and his best friend, Mason.

Ricky hugged Aury from behind, squeezing her tight. “You two are worse than those Eastern European men. Do you always have to drink so much? You’ll ruin your liver.”

I wasn’t drunk enough to ignore what he said.

Slowly, I raised my gaze to him. “Why do you care about our livers?”

Ricky grinned. “That’s a secret, Frena.”

I quickly looked away, horrified.

Fucking psycho.

“I didn’t think you’d come,” Aury said, totally unfazed.

“I had to come for three reasons,” he began. “First is you. Second is Emery because my little sister always gets into trouble.”

I searched the dance floor, recognizing almost everyone. Emery was dancing in the corner with Josh.

“And what is the third reason?” Aury wondered.

I glanced at Mason, and his eyes were set on Emery. I knew that the two of them had been texting each other, but I mainly wondered if Ricky knew about it. He didn’t like Josh because he was Aury’s friend, and his jealousy seemed endless, but Mason was his best friend.

What kind of reaction would he have if he saw that yearning look in Mason’s eyes set on his little sister?

“I need a drink!” I exclaimed and danced my way toward the bar. Jade followed me.

“Two martinis, please,” I told the bartender.

Jade took a seat on the stool. “You look really fire tonight.”

I leaned against her and chuckled. “Why are you so nice to me right now? Did you hit your head?”

The bartender placed the drinks in front of us. Jade took the first sip.

“I just… I know you needed this night. And I’m here for you when you’re ready to talk,” Jade said.

My smile slowly faded. I guess my acting wasn’t as good as I thought.

“Thank you,” I replied, grabbing my drink and gulping down half of it. “I want to dance with you now!”

I grabbed Jade’s hand and dragged her to the dance floor. Emery noticed us and joined us. She looked very drunk.

“Hands in the air, girls!” She shouted, swaying her hips from side to side.

The girls around us joined in our small circle, dancing the same way we did. The lights blurred into streaks of neon above us, the bass pounding so hard it drowned out every thought I didn’t want to have.

I moved without thinking, letting my body follow the rhythm, letting the alcohol and the noise carry me somewhere lighter.

For a moment, I forgot.

Jace, my mother, and the weight that always seemed to sit on my chest.

Emery laughed beside me, loud and carefree, throwing her hands into the air like she didn’t have a single problem in the world. In front of me, Jade spun in a circle, her hair flying and her lips curved into a grin so wide it made it impossible not to smile back.

This was what I needed. Chaos. Noise, and the people I loved.

I rolled my shoulders, letting the music control my body.

Someone suddenly bumped into me from behind, their hands briefly settling on my waist to steady me.

“Sorry,” the guy chuckled over the music, already moving away from me.

He was tall, dark-haired, and clearly drunk, like everyone else. For a few seconds, he danced with me-just two bodies moving to the same rhythm, surrounded by flashing lights. He smiled at me, raised his drink in a silent cheer, and disappeared back into the crowd as easily as he’d appeared.

I exhaled, ready to lose myself in the music again, when I sensed it. That kind of stare that made my skin prickle.

Across the dance floor, standing in the corner, was Jace.

He wasn’t dancing. He wasn’t drinking. He was standing there as if the world had paused for him alone. His eyes, which were full of longing and sadness, were fixated on me.

My heart skipped a beat. What a traitorous organ.

The song 12 to 12 by Sombr started playing.

For a split second, neither of us moved. It almost seemed it was just us, staring at each other like the week apart had been a lifetime.

There was something more in his gaze, though.

Anger and irritation.

If his look could kill, I’d be dead.

I didn’t know if I wanted to slap him or throw myself at him because no matter how hard I tried to deny it, I missed him.

No, he made it clear he wasn’t sure he wanted to be with me.

I turned back to my friends, letting the music swallow me whole. If Jace really wanted me, he would have chosen me when it mattered most. And tonight wasn’t about him; it was about forgetting.

Aury joined us on the dance floor, and soon we were all together, laughing and having fun. I was happy.

Emery was singing the lyrics out loud, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

My eyes betrayed me, though. When I glanced into the corner where Jace stood, he wasn’t there anymore.

Has he left?

I shook my head, focusing on the music instead.

I smiled as hard as I could and pushed the tears back. Now wasn’t the time for being emotional, but the alcohol somehow made me sentimental. That never happened to me before.

I turned to the girl beside me and stole her drink. I mouthed “sorry” and finished it in one go.

The lights, the people, and the music started to blur, but despite that, I still danced. I closed my eyes, losing my balance slightly.

Then I felt his gaze on me again.

When I opened my eyes, I found Jace standing among the crowd on the dance floor. He wore a gray hoodie and a black denim jacket. He looked so good-too good. Goosebumps rose along my arms.

I somehow found my balance when Jace darted toward me.

“I’ll be right back,” I shouted to the girls and backed away.

I distanced myself from the dancing crowd and looked for the exit sign, needing a breath of fresh air.

Ricky and Mason were standing by the bar, drinking something.

“Where’s the second exit?” I asked Ricky.

He raised his brow at me and chuckled. “Why? Is someone chasing you?”

I rolled my eyes and looked at Mason.

“That way.” He pointed to the right.

“Thanks.”

I rushed outside, pushing the people out of my way. What I wasn’t prepared for was the change of weather. It was raining.

I headed outside anyway. I didn’t care if it would ruin my makeup, and I definitely didn’t care that I’d freeze to death.

I folded my arms under my chest and walked down the street. Men were staring at me, shouting some nasty things, but I didn’t spare them a glance.

As I passed a kids’ toy store, I noticed the Legos on display behind the glass. It was the same flower set Jace built me.

I held my tears back. I had Jace’s flowers displayed on my nightstand at home.

“Freya!”

I jerked my head toward the sound of my name. Jace was sprinting after me, his eyeglasses shoved onto his head, his hair drenched and wild.

I quickly turned and continued to walk down the street. I was still tipsy, so I didn’t want to risk a fall onto the hard concrete in my high heels.

“Leave me alone!” I yelled, the rain falling onto my face.

“Freya, please! I can’t do this anymore. I can’t function without you.” Jace yelled, his voice sounding closer.

The rain started to pour harder. I was drenched, trembling from the cold. When I looked over my shoulder, Jace was just a few steps behind me.

“Stop lying!” I halted and faced him.

I was tired of running away. It wasn’t something I would usually do. I faced my problems, so why couldn’t I confidently face Jace?

Jace stopped in his tracks, leaving a distance between us.

“I love you,” Jace exclaimed, tears in his eyes. “I love you, Freya, and I can’t stay away from you.”

In the blink of an eye, he dropped his knees and crawled toward me.

I merely stared at him.

“Please, don’t be mad at me anymore.” His eyeglasses fell off his head and cracked on the concrete.

“Jace-”

He reached me and put his arms around the back of my knees. His face pressed into my legs, almost making me fall from the strong and sudden force.

“I won’t let you leave.” He said against my bare legs.

People who passed by eyed us, and I only gave them a sharp look.

“I missed you. I missed feeling you in my arms. I can’t live without it. I can’t.”

He was really begging me to keep being his girlfriend.

My heart was banging against my chest.

“Look at me, Jace,” I said sternly.

Slowly, his eyes lifted to meet mine. They were red and glossy from crying. He also looked exhausted, as if he hadn’t slept for days.

“If I told you to stop loving me and wanting me, would you?”

Jace’s fingers dug into my skin. “Never.”

“Then why did you stay silent last week? Were you hesitating?” I raised my voice, letting the tears break free.

Jace ducked his head for a moment and then stood up, his hands gripping my arms tightly.

“Because I’m a coward, Freya. I’m an insecure coward who is in love with you and who can’t see you being with someone else other than me. I wasn’t hesitating. I was trying to find the right words that would convince you about my sincerity.” He paused to take a breath, his eyebrows knitted together. “I almost lost my shit when I saw that guy touch you so carelessly. Only I can do that. Only I can touch you and feel you.”

His fingernails were buried into my skin, slightly hurting me.

Before I could say anything, he wrapped his arms around me, and my face was pressed in the crook of his shoulder.

“I don’t care how complicated your family is. All I know is that I want to keep being your boyfriend. I want to take care of you. I want to stay with you, and I won’t let someone else take my place.”

The tension vanished from my body. Even though I was freezing, Jace’s hug warmed me up like a fuzzy blanket.

“You could’ve told me this a week ago,” I muttered.

Jace laughed, shivering. “I was kind of scared of you rejecting me forever.”

“Ugh, I hate you so much,” I whispered, smiling.

He hugged me tighter, almost choking me. “You’re cold as ice, Freya. We have to go somewhere warm,” he said, rubbing my skin.

“There should be a motel nearby. We could… go there,” I suggested.

Jace gulped. “Let’s go then.”

⸻⸻

Fun fact: When I heard 12 to 12 on the radio, the whole scene of them staring at each other gave me the idea to write this whole chapter!

chapter 26︱let go

Jace’s pov

I hung my denim jacket over Freya’s shoulders even though it was a bit wet. I couldn’t bear to watch her tremble from the cold.

My eyeglasses were cracked, but thankfully, I had a spare pair at home. I wasn’t completely blind; I just couldn’t see properly into the distance.

The motel Freya mentioned was two streets further, so we ran there. We were lucky because they had the last room available. After I escorted Freya upstairs, I asked the receptionist for an umbrella so I could buy some sweatpants and hoodies.

When I returned, Freya was blow-drying her hair, and a towel was loosely wrapped around her body.

My eyes lowered to her thighs.

“You’re back so soon?”

I quickly looked away. “Yeah, here are the clothes.”

I put the clothes on the bed and stared at them.

“What are you doing?” Freya peeked from the small bathroom.

I blinked. “N-Nothing.”

She chuckled. “Get changed, or you’ll get sick again. You don’t need to be shy in front of me.”

I nodded, and my shoulders tensed.

Shyness is my entire personality.

First, I took off my hoodie and hung it on a chair. Then I slid off my pants and put on the black sweatpants.

As I grabbed the new hoodie, about to pull it on, a pair of hands suddenly touched my stomach from behind.

“It seems you’ve been working out a lot,” Freya whispered against my back, her hot breath making me gasp.

I bit into my cheek from all the unholy thoughts that whirled in my head.

“You know that I like you the way you are, right? You should only work out for yourself.” She added.

I cleared my throat. “I-I’m sorry. I want you to really like me. Only me and no one else.”

Freya pulled away and turned me to face her. “Are you that jealous, pretty boy?”

Heat radiated from my cheeks. “Of course I do. You’re too beautiful. I can’t compare to you.”

Freya’s hands traveled from my waist to my chest, grazing my nipples.

I forgot how to breathe for a second.

Her index finger lifted my chin as she drew closer, her hot breath tickling my bare skin. “What’s on your mind, Jace?”

I took a deep breath and stared into her pretty eyes. “ Many things.“

Her eyes lowered to my lips for a moment.

“Thanks for the clothes. I’m going to change,” she said and walked away to the bathroom.

Embarrassment swallowed me like a black hole.

I put on the hoodie, brushing my fingers through my hair.

I sat at the edge of the bed and touched my burning ears. How could someone be so beautiful that my heart refused to calm down?

My smile grew wider. I couldn’t stop the rush of happiness bubbling up inside me.

I hadn’t slept for days. I only thought about Freya and how stupid I was for shifting my insecurities onto her. It was never her fault but my own.

“I think you got my size wrong,” Freya said as she closed the bathroom door.

“Oh, I was in such a hurry; I must have misread the size.” I got up from the bed but froze when I saw her wearing just the hoodie and nothing else.

Freya flipped her hair to the other side, looking out of the window.

“I can’t believe it’s still raining,” she said and slipped beneath the comforter.

She looked at me after a few seconds. “Why are you standing there like a statue? Come here.” She patted the sheets.

My feet moved automatically, but the closer I got to her, the harder my heart slammed against my ribs.

Carefully, I sat down, unsure what to do next.

Freya pulled the comforter up to her chin and turned with her back to me.

“Can you turn off the lamp?” she asked.

Did I do something wrong?

“O-Oh, yeah.”

After turning off the lamp, I lay down as well. The bed only had one comforter, so we were very close to each other. I could feel her warmth and the scent of her perfume. It made me almost erase all the space between us, but she looked like she preferred some distance.

You fool, be glad you’re sleeping in the same bed as her.

“Jace?” She whispered after a few minutes of complete silence.

“Yes?”

“I’m a little cold. Warm me up with your body.”

Thank God.

I closed all the remaining space between us and gently put my hand over her stomach.

That feels so good.

Because I was glued to her, I couldn’t help but smell her hair.

She smells like heaven.

I unconsciously grabbed her hand, wanting to feel her skin.

“Freya…” I whispered into her ear and gently pressed my lips against her nape.

I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I just had the most insane urge to kiss her.

“Jace.” Freya turned to me, trying to climb on top of me, but I gently pushed her shoulders back and pinned her beneath me.

I couldn’t see her reaction since the room was dark, but I felt her eyes on me. I liked the feeling of having her under me. It was so new that every hair on my body stood up.

I slowly lowered myself, shifting my weight onto my forearms. Her bare thighs were touching mine.

Oh. My. God.

I gulped and pressed a kiss to her cheek. Then I leaned down and kissed her just below the jaw.

I didn’t know how to do this, but still, I wanted to try it on my own without any help.

When I moved to her throat, she quietly gasped.

That sound had a huge impact on me. I couldn’t hide my bulge anymore. I was sure she could feel it.

Freya’s hand moved down my chest, but I stopped her before she could take it further.

“Let it all go, please. Tonight, let me be the one to take care of you,” I whispered, and she withdrew her hand.

I laughed, my arms shaking. “If I’m being honest, I’ve never been more scared than I am right now.”

Freya touched my face, rubbing my cheek. “There’s no need for you to feel that way, Jace. Do whatever you want to do. I’ll enjoy it, believe me. I actually can’t wait for you to finally fuck me.”

I blinked. “Oh.”

Ohh.

“Don’t act surprised.” Freya chuckled. “If you could see inside my head, you’d be terrified by my thoughts.”

I exhaled a shaky breath and kissed her behind her ear. “I also have such thoughts.”

Before I could hesitate, I bit her earlobe. Freya groaned, and both of her hands traveled under my hoodie, touching my waist.

“Continue,” she murmured in her soft voice.

I halted, thinking of my next move. I decided to bite her shoulder next and kiss it gently afterward.

I hope it won’t leave a mark.

“More. I need more .” Freya lifted her hoodie, revealing her chest.

I stared at her through the darkness, knowing exactly what she wanted me to do.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

“Show me how much you want me,” Freya said, arching her back.

I swallowed the knot in my throat and slowly hovered my lips over her breast.

After a few seconds of deep breathing, I brushed my shaky lips against her nipple. The bud was hard and soft at the same time.

I moved to the other nipple and kissed it.

Freya suddenly grabbed me by the neck, forcing me to keep my face against her breasts.

“Tongue. Use your tongue,” she blurted.

I stuck out my tongue at her command and licked her entire breast. Freya moaned, locking her legs on my hips.

I licked her again, and her hips thrusted forward, grazing my bulge.

For a moment, I couldn’t move. That rush of arousal swept through my body like a wind. It was sudden, yet incredibly strong.

I’m not sure what came over me, but I decided to take the lead. I kissed Freya’s entire chest, focusing primarily on her nipples by biting and sucking them.

By the response of her moans, I knew I was doing a good job.

After leaving a trail of kisses along her neck, I moved back to her lips. They were warm and plump, comfortable to kiss, and nice to lick.

I’ve been dreaming about this since the semester started.

Freya kept teasing me by thrusting her hips against me. It was starting to get unbearable.

My breaths were shallow, my hands sweaty, and all I wanted to feel was her. I wanted her to envelop me, to hug me in her warmth.

Freya grabbed my face and smashed her mouth against mine. I gripped the pillow with both hands, pushing her head down to stay in control.

She quickly pushed my sweatpants down, and soon after, my underwear was next.

I went still as anxiety crept over me.

“Hey.” She touched my cheek. “I’ll help you just a little bit. You’ll know what to do next.”

I let out an exhale, and a nervous laugh. “Will I?”

Her hand suddenly appeared on my stomach. “Trust me.”

Freya slowly moved her hand downward until she fisted my dick. All the hair on my body prickled.

Oh, god.

I squeezed my eyes shut in pleasure.

She stroked my length a few times before she guided me into her entrance.

The slow sinking inside of her made my eyes go wide. My spine was covered in sweat, and my arms were shaking.

Freya was… extremely nice and warm.

Once I was fully inside her, I stayed still. Her walls completely enveloped me. It felt like a hug that you never wanted to end.

I buried my face into her neck, breathing heavily. Her quick pulse drummed against my skin.

“J-Jace?” Freya whispered.

I inhaled her scent, trembling. “Can I stay like this? You’re so warm.”

My cock was hurting. Like it wasn’t satisfied enough, making me carefully slide out of her. I gripped the pillow tighter, entering her again. This time, I felt a lot of wetness.

I let out the desperate sound I’d been holding inside since we were alone in the closet, and I had a taste of her.

“O-Oh my G-God,” I stammered, doing it all over again.

My mouth was directly in front of her ear, so I made her listen to what I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“Jace.” Freya moaned, her nails on my back, scratching my skin.

I didn’t feel any pain, only the pleasure-the smell of her skin and hair and how incredibly she felt beneath me.

“Go…” she paused, pressing me tighter with her thighs. “Quicker.”

I shook my head. “I want to remember every second of you slowly.”

Freya moaned, and her nails pressed deeper into my skin. The pain was nice when she caused it.

But I soon understood her urgency. The more the feeling of ecstasy grew, the more my thrusts were uncontrollable.

My face was in the crook of her neck, my limbs were shaking, and I couldn’t suppress the orgasm for much longer.

“F-From the moment you sat on my lap, I’ve wondered how beautifully you smell, how does your skin feel against mine?” I confessed, thrusting my hips roughly.

I pressed my lips against her skin to silence my whimpers, but they were too loud.

My eyes rolled back as the wave of orgasm was at its peak.

I gripped Freya’s shoulders and murmured, “I’m so sorry for this.”

I sank my teeth into her skin as the rhythm of my thrusts became quicker. It wasn’t something I could control. My instincts came naturally, and it all felt too good for me to slow it down.

“J-Jace. Fuck.” Freya groaned, stretching her neck.

Her fingers on my back, her hard nipples brushing against my chest, and her moans were too distracting. I wanted to focus on it all, but I was overwhelmed with emotions I’d never felt before.

And even if we did this every single day, I’d still be completely lost in her.

With the last shaky thrust, I came undone. My abdomen was full of butterflies, and the pulsing arousal around my dick made me lose all my remaining control. Her walls squeezed me, and the room was filled with our whimpers and moans.

My cum spilled inside her as she dug her nails into my back, a tremble coursing through her body.

After the orgasm slowly vanished, we stayed still for minutes, breathing heavily.

“That was…” Freya started.

I kissed the spot where I had buried my teeth and looked up at her.

“I’ll get better at it. Even though this was the best night of my life, I know I lacked experience,” I said.

Freya laughed and stroked my hair. “There’s nothing to improve in because that was the best night of my life, too.”

My heart skipped a beat. “Really?”

“Yes. I’ll never forget about it.” She caressed my cheek and froze.

“Is something wrong? Are you hurting?” I asked, worried.

Freya pushed me to sit.

“I should be the one to ask. Why are you crying?”

Crying?

I wiped my eyes, my fingers damp from tears.

“This is so embarrassing,” I murmured, wiping the tears with the sleeve of my hoodie.

Freya grabbed my wrists and straddled me. As she leaned closer, I tipped backward, and she pressed her lips gently to my closed eyelids.

“Don’t cry, pretty boy,” she whispered, her forehead pressing against mine.

“Those are happy tears,” I replied. “I’m just too happy.”

Freya laid her head on my chest, and I wrapped my arms around her back.

“I’m going to take a shower. Are you coming with me?” she asked.

I nodded. “Can I clean you? I really want to.”

She giggled. “Is that an excuse for wanting to see me naked?”

Heat rushed to my face again. “I just want to take care of you.”

Freya sighed and got up. “ And see me naked.“

She pulled me to my feet, and I realized I was naked from the waist down.

“Let’s explore each other’s bodies. You can’t be shy anymore.” She chuckled and helped me slip my hoodie off.

We stayed in the shower for a very, very long time.

⸻⸻

👀 Hope you liked the spicy chapter from Jace’s pov. I actually don’t like to write male pov’s cause I don’t think I’m good at it, but I always try to challenge myself.

chapter 27︱praise

I opened my puffy eyes to a bright room. It took a moment for them to adjust to the bright streaks of sunlight streaming through the curtains.

The room was incredibly serene, almost like stepping into another reality.

Everything felt surreal.

Then my stomach growled loudly.

I need food. Immediately.

I rubbed my eyes, ready to leave the bed, when suddenly, I was pulled back.

“Stay,” Jace whispered, his chin in the crook of my neck, and his hand resting on my stomach.

A shiver coursed through me.

“We have to leave. They must be looking for us,” I said, enjoying his hot breath against my skin.

He grabbed me tighter, kissing my neck.

“Let them search for us. I want to be alone with you,” he said between kisses.

As I was about to laugh, something hard poked me in the small of my back. Jace’s fingers were rough on my skin. It seemed he had found a new hobby-touching me non-stop.

Even during the night, before we fell asleep, he stayed glued to me from head to toe.

“Jace,” I called his name once.

He ignored me.

“Jace.”

Again. Nothing.

I took a deep breath and swiftly rolled on top of him.

He stared at me with wide eyes.

“You should be rough with me more often. I enjoyed it.” I smirked. “But we can’t stay here all day.”

His face got red.

“Jace!” I laughed and then kissed him. “You have to stop with this. It’s making me feel embarrassed when you feel embarrassed.”

Jace covered his eyes with his forearm. “I-I’m sorry, but I’ll always be startled by your beauty.”

This boy won’t stop praising me every chance he gets.

“Look at me,” I ordered.

Slowly, he withdrew his forearm and looked straight into my eyes. I straddled his hips, opening my thighs wider. His cock was already hard, and I was so soaked from his reactions.

How could his face, his eyes, and smile make me this wet?

Jace merely stared at me, but a desire glinted in his eyes.

“My pretty boy.” I positioned myself on top of his dick, holding him in my hand. “You feel great in my hand.”

Quickly, I slid down his length. Jace moaned, and his forehead creased.

I rocked my hips forward and smirked. “Don’t stop. Your voice is so hot.”

Jace gripped my thighs, watching me intently ride his needy cock. He felt so good inside me, I had to bite my lower lip.

He met my gaze, and that made me more aroused. I wanted him deeper inside me, somewhere where he couldn’t reach me.

I leaned to his chest, touching his skin. With my clit, I teased his head. Then I swallowed him again. I put my hands behind me, and held his legs. I tilted my head back and rode him until he was gasping, whining, and moaning.

“Oh, yes,” I whispered with my eyes closed, the slow but strong orgasm making my limbs tremble, hitting every nerve in my body.

Jace gripped my thighs, whimpering as he came right after me.

When it was over, I opened my eyes and found him smiling from ear to ear.

“Can we do this again?” he asked breathlessly.

I grinned. “Of course, sweetheart. Often, until we fall asleep, so be prepared because I don’t get tired that easily.”

“Me neither,” he quickly said, and I chuckled.

• • •

Both of us stayed dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie. I was too comfortable to even think of the dress I wore to the party.

The outfit was great, but I wanted to match with Jace, and I also didn’t want to wear my heels again.

Before we headed back to college, Jace took me to a restaurant to get breakfast and coffee.

We must’ve looked underdressed, but we didn’t care about our appearance. I was overflowing with happiness. My smile hadn’t faltered since the moment I woke up.

After finishing my scrambled eggs, I watched Jace eat his portion. I held his free hand, rubbing his knuckles. I never wanted to leave his side.

“Jace.”

He glanced at me, avoiding meeting my gaze.

I squeezed his hand. “Jace…”

“Hmm?” He chewed, staring at the cup of tea.

I sighed. “Will you look me in the eye?”

His cheeks were flushed again.

“Freya, that’s… difficult,” he murmured and swallowed.

I gripped his chin and turned his face toward me. Finally, he gave in and lifted his eyes to meet mine.

A long exhale followed.

I smiled and pressed my hand to his nape. “Speak up, sweetheart. What is going through your head?”

Jace faintly smiled. “You’re so breathtakingly beautiful without makeup. I also love your freckles.”

I buried my fingers in his hair, and Jace fell apart like a stack of cards. His hand landed on my thigh, gripping it tightly.

“Such a shame we’re not alone because I’d love to fill your neck with hickeys,” I whispered, and pulled back.

I took a sip of my tea, and Jace’s fingers were still gripping my thigh.

It took him a couple of minutes to calm down, but his hand didn’t move an inch from my thigh.

We left the restaurant after twenty minutes.

“Isn’t that your car?” I asked, staring at the silver Mercedes.

“Yeah, I had someone drive it here,” Jace confessed, opening the passenger door for me.

I got inside, smiling.

When Jace drove off, I realized my friends must’ve been mad at me for running off without telling them anything.

I charged my phone for ten minutes, and when I turned it on, there was only one message glowing in my notifications.

Aury: Ricky told me everything. Please have fun! The girls were too drunk, so I brought them to my house. Come here after you wake up, xx.

“Jace, head to your cousin’s house. They are apparently all waiting for us there.”

• • •

After parking near the house, we unbuckled our seatbelts.

“Do we really need to go there? Ricky will be an asshole.” Jace complained.

I chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from him.”

I opened the door and walked around the hood of the car to Jace. He stared at me with wide eyes as I opened his door.

“But before we go inside, I have to do this.” I climbed into his lap and straddled him, lowering the seat before pressing a kiss to Jace’s jawline.

He didn’t push me away or say a word in protest. I mean, how could he? For the five whole minutes, I was giving him hickeys.

“It’s good that you have long hair,” I whispered.

Jace held my waist, groaning lightly. “More, please.”

I nibbled his skin, gently sucking it.

His dick was poking me into my pussy.

This guy is way naughtier than I thought.

“Are you enjoying this?” I asked.

He hummed, sliding his hands to my ass.

I drew to his ear, moaning. “Do you want me to fuck you right now? Because your hands on my ass, and your hard dick between my legs are asking for it.”

Jace found my lips, gently kissing me. I smirked, rubbing myself against him.

“I love you, Freya Everson.”

I stilled and pulled back. “I love you, too, Jace Vaughn.”

Jace smiled with his dimples and gave me a peck on my nose. As I was about to kiss him again, my phone started to ring.

“We have to go now,” I murmured as I pressed my forehead against his.

“Unfortunately.” Jace pouted. “I’d rather stay alone with you.”

I pressed a kiss to his cheek and stepped out of the car. Then I grabbed his hand and pulled him out after me.

Surprisingly, he didn’t try to cover his neck. He looked proud of my hickeys.

That’s my boy.

As soon as we entered the hallway, Ricky appeared.

“After all, I’m always right. The cat caught the mouse,” he said as he walked towards us, shaking Jace’s free hand.

“Congratulations, Jace. You finally got what you wanted,” Ricky added.

I rolled my eyes.

“Freya!” Jade ran toward me with Emery and Aury.

Even Mason and Josh were here.

“Did we just miss the best sleepover?” I joked.

Emery looked at both of us up and down. “Are you already wearing matching clothes?”

Aury laughed. “You look so cute together.”

Jace squeezed my hand tighter.

“I’ll answer all of your questions after you back the fuck up a little.”

We moved to the living room and sat down on the couch. Jace sat beside me, holding me by the waist with his chin resting on my shoulder.

“So then, some girl almost wanted to fight me, and Aury had to hold me back. My Louis Vuitton heels were pointy enough to win the fight.” Emery filled us in on what happened after we ditched the party.

Why do the most interesting things happen right after you leave?

“Right, Josh? You almost fought her with me,” Emery remarked, looking at Josh, who was sitting next to her.

Aury shook her head. “Josh, I thought you were better than that. I mean, how could you support her in that? She already had the heel in her hand!”

Josh awkwardly laughed.

I threw a glance at Mason, who was sitting at the end of the couch, staring at Emery.

“By the way, thank you, Mason, for throwing the girl out,” Aury said.

Mason nodded with a faint smile.

Jace hugged me tighter, and I knew he wanted to leave. And it wasn’t because he didn’t like to spend time with my friends, but because I teased him too much in the car. He was breathing heavily against my neck the whole time, and while the girls were talking about last night, his hands were underneath my hoodie, touching my bare skin.

It drove me crazy.

After a few minutes, Mason stood up, frowning at his phone screen.

“I have to go,” he announced, putting his phone away.

Emery straightened. “So soon?”

The room grew quiet very quickly.

I glanced at Aury and Jade, who gave me the same bewildered look.

Ricky didn’t utter a word, which was worse than when he was babbling shit. I wondered what would happen once he’d find out that the two of them had become friends.

“I mean, thank you for coming to my party, and see you at the next one.” Emery rubbed her arms, avoiding Ricky’s eyes.

Mason smiled but only for a moment. “Thanks. Bye, everyone.”

He disappeared into the hallway, and a moment later, the front door slammed shut.

Ricky suddenly sprang to his feet.

“Where are you going?” Aury asked.

“For a smoke,” he answered, his face without a single expression.

Aury grabbed his arm and pulled him back down. “No, you’ll stay here.”

Sometimes it sounded like he was more of a dog than a human being.

Ricky surprisingly stayed sitting.

I cleared my throat. I needed to make the tension go away.

“Anyway,” I started. “We wanted to tell you that we’re officially dating and no one can break us apart.”

At once, everyone’s eyes snapped at me.

“Honestly, the longer I stare at you, the more you make sense to me.” Emery blurted out.

I fluttered my eyelashes, and squeezed Jace against my chest. “Right? My pretty boy can’t be with anyone else.”

Everyone burst into laughter, and I was glad I could ease the tension in the air.

• • •

We didn’t return to the dorms as soon as we thought we would. Jace fell asleep on my lap, and so did Emery on Josh’s shoulder. Ricky and Aury were hugging each other while watching a random movie playing in the background.

It was already evening, and I wanted nothing more than to sleep in my bed.

“Kaiden is here to pick me up,” Jade whispered.

“Let me walk you outside.” Aury writhed out of Ricky’s embrace.

I stroked Jace’s hair, enjoying the length because I loved tugging it.

“You know,” Ricky began, “I remember when Jace was small, and I stole his favorite toy. He slapped me with a very thick book. That boy has a lot more within him than you may think.”

I looked at him. “I know. He’s just opening up to people slowly, and I’ll patiently get closer to him.”

Ricky genuinely smiled. “That’s good. I wouldn’t like to see him be depressed. Once was enough.”

I gazed at my sleeping boyfriend. “I’ll make him very happy.”

He sighed and got up, taking out his cigarettes. “I’ll take you for your word, Freya.”

Ricky walked outside, and I glanced at Emery and Josh. They already looked like a couple, but I saw that yearning look in her eyes. It was written all across her face when Mason was leaving that she didn’t want him to go.

Love wasn’t easy. Either it destroyed you or made you the strongest you could ever be.

Nothing in between.

⸻⸻

I’ll publish the last three chapters together, so please be patient with me <3 Thank you for your support!

chapter 28︱drunk in love

Over the weekend, I decided it was time for Jace to meet my father. He was very happy about it. I, on the other hand, couldn’t help but stress about their meeting.

My father, Vincent, was one of those overprotective dads.

And since he had once voiced his opinion about Jace, I had to worry about his reaction.

Jace was the sweetest and the kindest guy you could ever meet, but he was also vulnerable. If my father said something too harsh, he’d take it to heart.

We stood before the door, my eyes fixed on the handle.

I hope this will go smoothly.

I unlocked the door, and we stepped inside. Hearing us enter, my father came to greet us.

Despite him being in his mid-forties, he didn’t look old. His black and silver hair was slicked back, and his tanned skin complemented the dark grey T-shirt he was wearing.

“Hello, Mr. Everson. I’m Jace Vaughn. Nice to meet you.” Jace extended his hand to my dad.

Vince arched one brow, and after a few seconds of silence, gripped his hand. Even his arm muscles tensed.

“Dad, don’t crush his bones, please,” I said, rolling my eyes.

Vince smirked. “It’s nice to meet you, too. Let’s move to the living room.”

We followed him, and I couldn’t help but notice Jace’s hand was clenched into a fist.

We sat down on our small, wine-red couch, and Dad went to get something from the kitchen.

“Are you okay?” I asked Jace.

He nodded, rubbing his hand. “I’m alright. You don’t have to worry.”

When Dad returned, he carried one of the bottles of whiskey Emery had gifted him for his birthday.

It was as strong as it was expensive.

Dad settled next to Jace and stared at him.

“So, do you have a car, Jace?” he wondered.

I sighed. “Of course. I told you he does-”

Dad shushed me. “I asked your boyfriend, not you, honey.”

Jace gulped. “Yes, sir. I have a car.”

“What brand?”

“Mercedes.”

“Model?”

“AMG C63.”

Dad took a deep breath. “I like those.”

Jace sighed in relief.

“What kind of future do you see with my precious daughter?”

Was I invisible?

Jace ducked his head down and smiled. “I know you have some doubts about my family and me. I understand what you must think about us. But that’s not who we are. My family loves Freya. And we don’t look down on people. I fell in love with your daughter the moment our eyes met. There’s no other woman who could interest me or with whom I could see my future. I’ll take care of your daughter, Mr. Everson.” Jace paused and raised his gaze to my father. “I’d even go on one knee right now if I could.”

Thump. Thump. Thump.

Dad blinked after a couple of seconds of being still.

“T-That’s way too soon, young man! You have to finish college first.” Vince cleared his throat, gripping his knees.

Jace frantically nodded. “Y-Yes, sir! I’ll propose after college.”

Propose?

What?

Oh. My. God.

“That’s right,” Dad murmured, his eyebrows knitted together.

I coughed, my throat suddenly dry. “I need water.”

I strode to the kitchen, internally panicking. I had never thought about marriage, and Jace was too hasty. I’ve seen what a rushed marriage did to my parents.

It brought them disaster.

I chugged the water, leaning against the sink.

However, on the other hand, I found Jace’s planning cute. He was prepared to spend his whole life with me, without hesitation.

I let out a breath and went back to the living room to save my boyfriend from my father, but as I stepped in, I froze.

Jace’s cheeks were red; it looked like they were burning. My father was laughing, with the glass in his hand.

“Dad!” I marched towards him. “Jace is not a big drinker. This is too much for him.”

He gave me a side glance. “Honey, every proper man should handle alcohol. And Jace is doing fine, right?” He turned to him.

Jace swallowed, grimacing. “Of course. The whiskey is… great.”

“See?” My father chuckled. “He likes it.”

• • •

Two hours later, my father and Jace were completely drunk and had somehow become friends.

Alcohol is unpredictable.

Their sharp laughter had been ringing in my ears for an hour, and I had had enough of the TV. I just wanted to go to bed.

“Dad, it’s too late. Jace needs to go,” I said, leaning against my fist.

He stopped laughing and looked at the time. “But…but Jace is…look at him. He can’t even hold the glass.”

I sighed. “I’ll call him a cab. But honestly, how could you make him so drunk?”

Dad chuckled, patting Jace’s shoulder. “This guy is actually funny. He says so many things that make zero sense.”

Jace was smiling, barely able to sit straight.

I’ll kill them.

I leaned over to Jace and snatched the glass from his hand. “No more drinking.”

He smiled and hugged me, nuzzling his face into my chest. “Yes, ma’am. I’m your slave.”

My eyebrows shot up to my hairline.

“That guy is spitting nonsense, honey. He should stay for tonight.” Dad said as he got up, touching the wall to steady himself and prevent losing his balance.

“Really? Can he stay?”

“My son-in-law can stay over at any time!” Dad proclaimed with his pointed finger.

Within seconds, he was almost on the floor.

“I’m… I’m going to lie down. And it’s not because I’m drunk! I can handle my liquor. I’m just tired, that’s all,” Dad added.

I nodded, and he slowly backed into the hallway.

He did not, in fact, handle alcohol well. He never did.

“Jace, stand up. We need to move to my bedroom,” I softly said, rubbing his back.

He rubbed his nose against my chest, hugging me very tightly.

“No, I want to cuddle you,” he murmured.

I smirked. He’s so into me.

“You will, but in bed. Let’s go.”

I managed to get him to stand and drag him into my bedroom. After I laid him on the bed, I had a quick shower and changed into random pajamas.

When I returned, Jace was staring at me, or more like staring at my chest since my nipples were visible through the thin tank top.

I got under the covers, and he suddenly yanked up my top, kissing my breasts.

“Oh God, you’re so naughty,” I whispered, biting my lower lip not to let out any sound.

“You’re so soft,” he blurted, licking my nipple.

This boy is lucky we’re not completely alone. He wouldn’t otherwise survive this night.

I tangled my fingers in his hair, pulling it. “You’re unfair.”

Because of my pull, he raised his gaze at me. “Your existence is unfair. You’re making me feral.”

In the blink of an eye, Jace was fully on top of me, biting my neck. I grabbed his waist, trying to push him away, but he was stronger than he looked.

“I can’t stop. I want my lips all over you,” he breathed.

I sneaked my hand to his crotch. “You will have all of me. Just not now.”

I gently rubbed him through his jeans, enjoying his quiet moans.

I loved teasing him.

Jace’s face fell into the crook of my neck, and he laughed. “Ma’am, end my torture. I really want to take off my jeans.”

I chuckled at his drunk voice. He sounded like a different person.

“So what? You think I’d let you fuck me?”

Jace looked up, breathing heavily. “Step on me, slap me, shame me, I don’t care. I’m all yours to be played with.”

Well then…

I smiled. “Take off my shorts and panties.”

He obeyed, tossing them to the floor.

Drunk Jace was clumsy. For a moment, he got dizzy and almost couldn’t find my face. As soon as he got stable, his hands gripped my knees, and he spread my legs apart.

My eyes grew wide.

I closed my legs back with force.

“Did I allow you to do that?” I asked, pushing his chest with my foot.

“No…” he mumbled, breathing quickly.

So delicate.

“Now, do as I say, or you’ll sleep on the couch tonight,” I teased.

Jace’s eyes widened in horror. I laughed inside my head.

I need to keep my emotions at bay.

“Kneel on the floor,” I ordered.

He moved exactly where I told him, without a hint of hesitation.

“Don’t move an inch, Jace.”

He nodded, and I grabbed a random pillow from behind me. I positioned myself on my knees as well and placed the pillow between my legs. I slid the tank top off, threw it onto the floor, and squeezed my sensitive breasts.

Even though I wanted Jace to touch them, something was thrilling about watching him drool over me.

His mouth was partially opened, and his hands clutched his knees so hard that his knuckles were white.

I licked my fingers and slid them to my clit. Slowly, I drew small circles, enjoying the heat pooled in my inner thighs.

Jace gulped and clenched his jaw, staring at me with hunger.

“Keep staring at me, Jace. I don’t want you to move your eyes anywhere else.” I panted, pressing my free hand to the pillow underneath me.

“Yes, ma’am,” Jace uttered through his teeth.

Hearing him say that made goosebumps prickle across my skin.

I widened my legs and rubbed my wet pussy against the pillow.

“Be honest with me…” I paused, my eyes rolling back. “Have you jerked off at the thought of me? I want to hear how pathetically in love you are.”

With every thrust, my body tingled.

I looked at Jace, who was staring at my cunt.

“S-Speak,” I whispered, moving quicker.

“Yes…” he answered. “I did.”

I squeezed my left breast, wanting his slender fingers to touch my nipples.

“Describe it. Now.”

I was so close to orgasm. I closed my eyes, moving to a rhythm.

“I-I crashed down into my chair, and slipped my hand into my underwear. Then I pulled my dick out and wrapped my fingers around it.”

Yes, that’s it. Keep going.

“I started thinking about you. About your lips, your thighs, and how incredibly you smell. It hurt too much not to touch myself.”

Oh god.

“I couldn’t stop it. I had to think about you while doing it. It was stronger than anything in my life.”

Jace-

“When I orgasmed, I thrashed against the chair, almost breaking the armrest. My cum spilled on my stomach, but…”

“But what?” I asked, panting.

Jace met my eyes, biting his lower lip before continuing.

“My cum spilled on my stomach, but I wanted to bury my nose into your neck, and come apart while I was inside you.”

Fuck.

With frantic thrust, I came like never before, making quiet moans and whimpers. I squeezed the sheets between my fingers and rode off my orgasm until the ecstasy subsided.

After I slowed down my breathing, I threw the used pillow to the floor and quickly hid under the comforter.

I couldn’t help but smile. My body was so alive that the energy itself was consuming me.

In less than a few minutes, Jace’s breathing grew deeper.

He was desperate.

A small smirk crossed my face. “Come here, pretty boy.”

In an instant, he was on the bed, pulling off my comforter.

“Sorry, not sorry-” Jace grabbed my shoulders and smashed his lips against mine. His tongue flicked over my tongue and teeth.

Fuck, he is needy. I can’t get enough of it.

His fingers squeezed my shoulders, pressing me harder to the bed.

“Your lips…” He licked them. “I want to kiss them every single second.”

I softly chuckled. “Don’t stop then.”

Jace smirked and lowered his head to my breasts, kissing and biting each one for several seconds.

I sneaked my hand inside his underwear, and went still.

“Uhm…”

He pulled back, staring at me. “W-What?”

“I teased you too much, it seems,” I whispered.

Jace fluttered his eyelashes. “I’m sorry. You can punish me.”

My eyebrows shot up. “Why should I punish you for coming into your underwear? That would be cruel of me, since it was my fault.”

Wow, he looks… disappointed?

“Unless,” I started. “You want to be punished.”

Jace slowly shifted his eyes to mine and drew his face closer.

“I’d love…” His yearning gaze dropped to my lips. “Your fingers around my throat, please .”

I sighed and bit the inside of my cheek.

My fingers enveloped his throat, and Jace whimpered, growing hard again.

“I knew you weren’t an angel. This is what gets you off, doesn’t it?” I said with a smirk and rolled on top of him, squeezing his throat until he couldn’t breathe.

That triumphal look in his eyes was something I’d remember until the day that I died.

⸻⸻

Y’all, I’m crazy, but I want to write a story about Freya’s father 👀.

  ![](https://img.wattpad.com/68cca2fe28b8e1d2edcf0639f9320dc9c7170391/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f4b6c39734763583832795f726b773d3d2d313539373930303632302e313839633639343664336432386438633437313034353139373631332e6a7067)

chapter 29︱suprise

When the class ended, I walked with Emery and Jade to the coffee shop where Aury worked. Everyone from school went there. It was really convenient since it was close, and the coffee tasted amazing.

Finally, the weather got warmer, and I could wear my crop tops and low-rise jeans with Jace’s jacket on top.

We entered the coffee shop, and Josh was at the counter.

“Hey,” I greeted him.

He looked up, his eyes straying for a moment to Emery.

“Hey, how are you all doing? I haven’t seen you in a while,” Josh said.

We moved closer to the counter to hear each other better.

I shrugged. “I got the best man ever, so I couldn’t be happier.”

“Already bragging?” Aury laughed as she strolled from the back.

“Of course I am. Jace is the love of my life,” I declared, and lifted my

chin.

Jade snorted, and I shot her a death glare over my shoulder.

“Freya is right. My cousin is an angel,” Emery chimed in, smiling.

A very horny angel.

We ordered coffee and sat in the back. The place was almost packed. I was glad we found somewhere to sit.

“So, where is the love of your life, Freya?” Jade asked.

I wonder, too.

“He texted me that he’s busy with some assignment. I invited him to get coffee with us, but I guess he couldn’t come after all,” I replied.

Emery sighed. “With his smart brain, he should be finished by now. It’s already afternoon. Maybe you should give him a call-”

“No,” I cut in with a smile. “It’s alright. He’ll call me or text me when he’s available. I don’t want to mess up his GPA.”

Aury showed up moments later, placing our coffee in front of us.

“One large vanilla latte with three pumps of caramel for you, my dear friend,” Aury announced my order.

“Thank you, bitch.” I slapped her ass. “You make the best coffee in the entire world.”

Aury squeezed my shoulder, smirking.

We chatted about school, our relationships, and everything in between, the conversation flowing easily like it always did. Laughter came without effort. I couldn’t imagine a day without speaking to my best friends.

They were my family.

But Jace was still at the back of my mind.

What was he doing?

“Em, have you heard about the new movie that is coming out on Friday? That thriller?” Josh asked.

“Yeah, I heard it’s supposed to be amazing. Why?”

I rolled my eyes. Is she seriously playing dumb?

“I wondered if you wanted to go see it with… me,” Josh proposed, rubbing his neck.

Emery smiled, nodding. “Sure. Why not?”

Josh let out a long exhale, wiping his probably sweaty hands on his thighs.

“I’ll pick you up at seven.”

“Alright. I’ll be waiting outside.”

Josh then left our table to get back to work. More customers trickled in.

I turned to Emery with an arched eyebrow.

Her eyes narrowed at me. “What?”

“What was that?” I asked, my brow arched.

She shrugged. “I wanted to tease him. He looked super nervous.”

“Yeah, because he likes you too much,” Jade remarked, taking a sip of her black coffee with no sugar.

Emery frowned. “I do too. Josh is exactly what I need. A good guy. And we’re already great friends.”

Jade tucked her raven hair behind her ear. “So are you with Mason.”

Emery remained silent.

Like I previously said. Feelings could get complicated, and resolving them was as twice as hard as admitting them.

• • •

By seven in the evening, Jace had completely ignored my existence. No calls or messages-it was as if he’d vanished.

I asked his classmates about him, and they said he hadn’t shown up for any lectures, which was odd since he never missed one.

My anger turned into concern.

If Jace wasn’t in his dorm and wasn’t studying or attending his lectures, then where the hell was he?

I groaned, staring at the numerous unread messages I sent him. They all got delivered, though.

“Maybe he needed a break from you,” Jade said suddenly, a book in her hand.

I slowly turned to her. “A break? Why would he need one?”

She sighed and flipped the page. “Sometimes, you’re too much. I got used to it, but maybe Jace hasn’t yet.”

I rolled my eyes. “Thank you for telling me that I’m annoying. It really helped me.”

“You’re not annoying, Freya. You just have too much energy, and someone as similar as me needs to be alone for a while when it gets overwhelming. It’s not your problem, but ours,” she explained.

Well, that makes it a bit better.

“Ugh, if he wanted to be alone, he could’ve just told me! I’m his girlfriend for fuck’s sake.”

I didn’t like being away from him for too long because I missed him, but if he needed space, I would understand.

Hiding it behind a lie was not right.

The door suddenly opened, and Emery walked in, holding a huge box.

“You went shopping without us?” I exclaimed. “I hate you.”

Emery frowned. “No? This is not mine, for once. Some delivery guy gave it to me when I was entering the building.”

“Who is it for then?” Jade wondered.

Emery drew closer, staring at me. “It’s for you, Freya.”

I sprang up from the bed. “For me? What’s inside?”

Emery set the box on my desk, and I quickly pulled the black ribbon off the Dior box.

Once I saw what was inside, I gasped.

“Wow,” Emery whispered.

Carefully, I took the dress out of the box to have a better look at it. It was deep purple, sleek and elegant with tiny straps.

There was also a small silver purse in the box, along with matching high heels.

“Read the card, Freya,” Jade said, pulling me out of my trance.

I grabbed the card and opened it.

“Parking lot. 8 pm. Jace, xx.” I read out loud, my heart beating quicker.

So he wasn’t hiding from me, but preparing a surprise?

I’m going to cry.

“That’s so cute of him. So Jace-like.” Emery giggled, holding my shoulders.

Could I die from happiness? Hopefully not, because I never wanted this feeling to fade.

• • •

Slowly, I walked down the stairs, searching for Jace’s car, but I couldn’t find it. There was only a black limousine parked right in front of the steps.

That can’t be him.

I exhaled, not thinking negatively. He wouldn’t keep me waiting. Jace was punctual, unlike me.

When I was on the last step, the limousine’s door opened, and my breath whooshed out of my lungs.

“Oh, God. You’re the most beautiful woman in the entire world.”

Jace closed the distance between us, pulling me into his chest.

“I’m the luckiest man alive.” He kissed my temple and smiled against my skin.

When he noticed I didn’t utter a word, he pulled back, staring at me.

“Freya? Are you okay?” he asked.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and pushed back the tears.

“Y-Yeah, I’m sorry. I just got… surprised,” I said, a faint smile on my face.

Jace’s hand moved to my throat as he kissed my forehead. “I know I should’ve called you, but this took me a lot more time than I anticipated. I hope you’re not mad at me.”

I shook my head. “N-No, of course not.”

My gaze went up and down Jace’s outfit. He was dressed in gray slacks and a black shirt that was tucked into his pants. His wrist was decorated with a very expensive watch, and he smelled like sandalwood.

I want to lick him-

No. Not now.

“Shall we leave, ma’am?” He chuckled, and I nodded.

He opened the door for me, and when I stepped inside the car, my heart was hammering against my ribs.

I’ve seen him dressed elegantly before, but this time, it was different. The butterflies in my stomach were restless.

Once the limousine took off, Jace interlaced our fingers.

“Where are your eyeglasses?” I wondered.

“I exchanged them for contacts. It didn’t go well with my outfit,” he replied.

I squeezed his fingers and moved our hands onto my thigh. “I disagree. I love your eyeglasses.”

Jace turned to me with a noticeable gulp.

I was like a cat in heat.

“Y-You’re very beautiful,” he stuttered.

I smirked. “You told me that already.”

Jace averted his eyes. “Oh.”

“Where are we going?” I asked, caressing his thigh.

He took a deep breath, shifting in his seat. “Out of town.”

“That means we have some spare time.”

I grabbed Jace’s neck and brought our mouths together in a sudden crash. I darted my needy tongue out and licked his lips.

“You taste good,” I murmured against his mouth, feeling his pulse on my fingertips.

Jace was breathing quickly, our foreheads pressed together.

I was so hypersexual around him. I wanted to tear my dress to pieces and lunge at him.

Jace slowly raised his eyes to mine. “Sorry for this,” he said, and pushed my shoulders to lie down.

In no time, he was on top of me, kissing the side of my throat that sent tingles all over my body.

“You’re a bad boy, Jace. I have a bad influence on you,” I mumbled, thrusting my hips against his.

He kissed his way down to my chest, licking me between my breasts. “I don’t care. You’re all I want.”

My pussy throbbed.

This continued until we reached the restaurant, but before we exited the limousine, we fixed each other’s clothes with laughter.

The chauffeur opened the door for us, and Jace got out first to offer me his hand. I thanked him and the chauffeur before we headed into the luxurious restaurant that was enormous, with huge crystal chandeliers.

People were wearing gorgeous dresses and tuxedos, and now we were among them.

A waiter led us to our table, and Jace pulled out the white chair for me to sit.

I let him order the food for us since I didn’t know what the names on the menu meant. It was an Italian restaurant, and Jace knew which meals I would like.

The waiter poured us an expensive champagne and left the bottle chilling in ice on the candlelit table.

Jace and I sat opposite each other, and I couldn’t help but want to tease him.

“You look stunning in this dress,” Jace commented all of a sudden.

I raised a brow. “You were the one who picked it.”

He smiled. “But the dress alone doesn’t look good. Only you make it worthy of praise.”

I finished the glass of champagne with a smirk and lifted my right foot to his groin.

Jace muffled his moan with his palm.

Oops.

“How long will it take you to lose control? Before or after dinner?” I chuckled, rubbing the tip of my heel against his cock.

Jace spread his legs wider, and I clenched my jaw.

“Oh, so this is how you will play?” I bit my lower lip. “Alright.”

Our waiter then brought us the food, which he placed all around the table. Although the food looked delicious, I was hungry for something else.

I focused on eating, enjoying the taste of the meat, refusing to look at Jace.

He yearned for my eyes, for me to continue to rub him.

He waited for me to lose it first .

“You picked a great restaurant. The food is amazing,” I voiced, chugging the next glass of champagne.

“I’m only happy when you are.”

My eyes betrayed me, lifting to Jace’s face. He leaned into his palm, looking like the most beautiful dream one could have.

Fuck.

I won’t let

him win

this.

I raised my foot to his groin again, rubbing him harder. He gripped the edge of the table, breathing as if he had just run a marathon.

Once he started to tremble, I dropped my foot to the floor, knowing he was so close to cum in his pants again.

Jace hid his face in his palms, all red, even his ears.

The waiter returned with a chocolate dessert, and I couldn’t wait to eat it.

I let Jace catch his breath and pay all my attention to the dessert.

I ate without a care. Who gives a fuck about a bit of chocolate on your lips?

“You have something… here.” Jace pointed to the corner of his mouth.

“Oh, here?”

“No, a bit higher.” He leaned across the table, wiping the corner of my mouth with his thumb.

I couldn’t let this opportunity go to waste.

I licked his thumb, and when it slightly shifted to my lips, I swallowed it whole.

Jace took a ragged breath, staring at me.

His eyes were narrowed, and his pupils dilated.

After he sat back in his chair, I excused myself to go to the bathroom to fix my lipstick, but before I could lock the door behind me, it swung open, and I was slammed against the wall.

Jace smashed his lips on mine, moaning into my mouth.

“You didn’t play fair,” he murmured while taking a quick breath.

I palmed his dick through the pants. “I never do, my sweet boy.”

Jace groaned and sank to his knees, pushing the bottom of my dress to my hips.

I threw my leg over his shoulder. He didn’t waste a single second. His tongue frantically rubbed my clit, sucking me as if his life depended on it.

He always knew how to use his tongue correctly.

“You’re such a good boy. Keep going.” I fisted his hair and pulled on it.

His hands locked on my hips, holding me in place.

“F-Fuck,” I whimpered, enjoying the way he kissed my cunt.

Jace pulled back to take a long breath, staring into my eyes. “The best dessert.”

Once again, he buried his face between my legs, biting me. My orgasm was reaching its highest point.

“Inside, Jace,” I ordered.

He obeyed and darted his tongue into my pussy, his fingernails scratching my skin.

“Y-Yeahhh. Don’t. S-Stop,” I whispered, leaning against the wall as my orgasm exploded, reaching every nerve in my body and setting it on fire.

Jace’s tongue was so warm and wet, I had to shove his face deeper. He sucked me until my orgasm slowly subsided, and he could finally take a deep breath.

I grinned when I noticed how messy his face had become.

I put my leg down and went to grab a tissue to wipe his face.

Jace was still kneeling, watching me as he panted.

“Come here.” I crouched down and cleaned him up.

He gawked at me with parted lips, and all I wanted to do at the moment was fuck him. Hard and slow.

When we returned to our table, we finished the champagne and ordered drinks. The live band started to play, and I enjoyed their private performance.

Jace was still on my mind, how he hadn’t been pleasured, but I knew he liked the pain. He wanted to wait until we’d leave the restaurant because the waiting excited him more. He loved foreplay far more than I did.

And because I’m the most amazing girlfriend in the entire world, I sucked him off in the limousine.

Of course, I had to thank him for dinner.

⸻⸻

chapter 30︱dance

Since we didn’t have any classes today, I invited all my friends to a dance lesson.

You can guess who didn’t want to go at first.

Jade.

But I managed to convince her to come along with my persuasive words.

I didn’t just invite them-I also texted Jace, Kaiden, Mason, Josh, and Ricky, because the moment I pictured all of us dancing together, I knew it would turn into complete chaos.

I also wanted to test my theory about Mason and Emery. She was lying to herself. Her eyes betrayed her words.

I knew what I was talking about. I was lying to myself, too.

But the truth can sometimes be hard to swallow. I wouldn’t push Emery into anything, but she had to be honest with herself.

I wish someone would open my eyes and force me to face the truth. That way, I wouldn’t waste my time wondering again and again whether what I felt was just a momentary feeling or something real and beautiful.

Once we were all ready, we met up at the parking lot.

“Damn, you look all hot,” I exclaimed, staring at my best friends.

“Are you sure I can wear this?” Emery asked. “It’s pretty short.”

She wore a powder pink asymmetrical skirt that fell just below her ass.

“Don’t tell me you’re only wearing the skirt and nothing else underneath it,” Aury teased, covering her mocking laughter.

Jade shook her head, suppressing a smile.

“Don’t worry. I’ll lend you my shorts,” I said, and Emery frowned at me.

We got into Aury’s new car, which Ricky had bought for her, and fastened our seatbelts.

“I guess I know what your plan is, Em,” I started, and she turned to me. “You want to tease Josh, but I don’t think that boy would handle seeing your ass and your G-string.”

Before I could start laughing, Emery lunged at me in the back seat, pinching my arms. Aury and Jade, in the front, completely ignored us and just quietly giggled.

“You’re insane,” Emery whispered, straddling me.

I raised my hands in surrender. “What? Don’t act as if what I said wasn’t true. That guy is very into you.”

Emery sighed with a smirk. “I know. Josh is obsessed with me. As he should.”

“Exactly!” Aury cut in. “I know Josh just as well as I know all of you. You don’t have to worry about him, Emery. He genuinely likes you.”

Emery’s eyes widened for a moment.

“Of course. How could he not? I’m perfect.” She chuckled.

• • •

Emery put on her favorite playlist, and we all began to stretch. The girls followed my lead, and I felt like a teacher.

I’d honestly like teaching others to dance. Dancing was my life.

“Arch even more, Aury. Your body must be properly stretched,” I instructed.

She let out a sigh. “I’m doing my best, but I’m not that flexible.”

I raised a brow. “I should check the facts with Ricky.”

“Don’t you dare-”

“Already gossiping about me, Freya?”

I looked over my shoulder, finding Ricky, Kaiden, and Jace standing in the doorway. They were all wearing matching T-shirts that said: I LOVE MY HOT GIRLFRIEND.

Aury broke into laughter first. I followed right after her.

“Didn’t you say they would like it?” Kaiden glared at Ricky.

“Do they look like they hate it? They’re just making fun of us.” Ricky scoffed, running his fingers through his longish hair.

I was laughing so hard that I didn’t notice Jace had sat down beside me.

“Hey, beautiful,” he whispered and kissed my cheek.

“Nice shirt,” I smirked.

Jace ducked his head with a wide grin. “It was actually my idea.”

My eyes widened. “No way.”

“Am I late? What did I miss?” Josh asked, appearing suddenly behind Ricky and Kaiden.

“Don’t tell me you’re wearing that T-shirt, too,” I blurted and looked at Emery, who rolled her eyes.

Kaiden pointed his finger at Jace. “ You gave him this idea.“

Jace shrugged, his cheeks as red as tomatoes.

“Boys, it’s alright,” Emery said. “I’m sure the girls appreciate your very clear statement. At least they don’t have to worry about anyone hitting on you.”

Aury got up. “Ricky, your face is like a magnet for girls. From now on, I want you to wear this every time you go out.”

Ricky smiled with his dimples. “Anything for my darling.”

We broke into another round of laughter.

When did we get so cringe?

Jade remained seated on the floor, watching her boyfriend closely. I couldn’t tell if she was annoyed, pleased, or somehow both at once.

“Alright, you crazy people, let’s start dancing.” I grabbed Emery’s phone and turned on my favorite song SUPERSCAR by ADÉLA .

“Boys, move behind your partner. And girls, follow me,” I instructed.

Jace walked behind me, his hair tied in a low ponytail.

He’s so handsome.

Because none of them ever danced, I kept the moves slow and simple. I spread my legs wide and bent over. Slowly, I trailed my hands up my legs until I straightened.

When I saw the girls copy me, I continued with the next move.

“You’re doing so well,” I said, moving my body from side to side. “Just feel the music.”

Aury kept smiling, and although Jade’s expression was stoic, her eyes gave away that she was enjoying it.

Josh had his hands on Emery’s waist as she leaned against his chest, a smirk on her face.

Thankfully, her brother was completely distracted by Aury’s ass to notice how starved Josh looked at her.

When the third song ended, I clapped. The girls moved effortlessly, and the boys’ “unique” moves left me… speechless.

“That was so much fun!” Aury exclaimed, grabbing a water bottle.

“You should all join my dance classes.” I grabbed Jace’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “It would be even better with you.”

Emery laughed. “I already can’t feel my legs.”

“You would get used to it,” I said and made my way to the corner of the room where a few chairs were stacked and dragged one into the middle. The others settled down side by side, watching me.

“Now, I want to play our favorite game. And if you pick the truth but refuse to answer, you’ll have to do my dare.” I pulled an empty water bottle from my bag.

They all groaned instantly.

“The last time we played this game, it went horribly,” Jade said.

I narrowed my eyes. “That’s the point of the game, sweetheart.”

She rolled her eyes at me.

We shifted into a circle, our boyfriends settling in beside us. I handed the bottle to Josh, watching as he gave it a quick spin. We all followed it with our eyes until it slowed and came to a stop, the cap pointing straight at me.

Josh smirked.

“Truth or dare?” he asked.

“I pick the truth this time,” I answered, peering at Ricky, who was already grinning at me.

Bastard.

“Aury is your best friend,” Josh began. “Do you like that she’s dating Ricky? Yes or no, please.”

Great. I hate Josh now.

“This should be interesting,” Aury whispered beside me.

I took a deep breath, pretending to think it through, even though I already knew my answer.

“You probably expect me to say something negative, but… my answer is yes.”

Ricky raised an eyebrow, but I kept going. “Seeing you happy with that jerk makes me emotional, and we all know that I rarely show my weak side.”

“Who is ‘we’?” Jade cut in.

I chuckled and smiled at Aury.

“What I’m trying to say is that Ricky makes you happy, and that is enough for me. I’m glad you found your person.”

Aury extended her hand for me to take.

“Thank you, Freya. It means a lot,” she said.

I squeezed her fingers.

It was my turn to spin the bottle. I flicked it and watched it slow, my anticipation building, until it stopped on Emery. I couldn’t help but smirk.

“Truth or dare?” I asked, staring into her hazel eyes.

Emery hummed, staring at the ceiling for a few seconds. “Dare.”

My smile grew wider.

“Are you sure about that?” Jade asked.

“Yeah, you will regret this…” Aury added.

Originally, I thought this would be more difficult, but fate was on my side once again.

“Emery,” I paused. “I dare you to perform a lap dance on Josh right now.”

Ricky’s death glare pierced through my skull.

Emery ignored everyone’s stare and grabbed Josh’s hand. While she dragged him to the middle of the room, Ricky said he had to smoke.

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” Josh tried to whisper, but we heard him regardless.

Emery shook her head when he sat down on the chair.

She smirked. “But I do want to.”

I picked a random song from her playlist called: Feeling like a sexy bitch.

As soon as the song began, Emery straddled Josh, and we all started to clap and cheer.

Suddenly, Jace’s hand came around my waist.

“Speak your mind, pretty boy,” I whispered.

He was quiet for a while.

“What is the purpose of forcing Emery to do that?” he asked.

Jace’s answer arrived the moment the door quietly opened, and Mason walked in.

“You will sooner or later understand,” I replied.

I watched Mason hide in the corner because he thought no one had seen him come. Since Josh had his back turned to us, Emery noticed him almost immediately.

For a moment, she froze.

I looked over my shoulder at Mason, whose jaw was clenched so hard I thought it would break. Even the vein on his neck was prominent.

Well, well, well.

I

watched Emery return to her freestyle dancing, unaware that I now knew her darkest secret.

“They look so good together,” Aury noted.

“Agree.” Jade smiled.

When the song ended, Ricky returned and noticed Mason standing in the corner.

“Why are you here?”

Ricky looked baffled.

“Uhm, Freya invited me,” Mason answered.

Everyone else greeted him, since we had all grown closer in these past few months. We chatted for a bit, and soon the pizza arrived, and we all ate right there on the floor.

Mason kept stealing glances at Emery and vice versa. But the way she was looking at Josh wasn’t a lie. She really liked him.

As the evening went on, Jade fell asleep in Kaiden’s arms, and he kept caressing her hands. They were honestly the cutest couple ever. Jade was like a cat who slowly warmed up to affection.

Emery and Josh argued over pineapples on pizza. Josh claimed that if you don’t try it, you can’t know if you hate it.

Aury and Ricky were, as always, too glued to each other, but they made a lot of sense, especially after Ricky saved her from her abusive father.

And there was Jace, who was lying against my shoulder, hugging me to the point I could barely move.

“The pizza was great,” he said, his breath tickling my ear.

“Yeah, it’s from the same place you took me to.” I took another bite.

Jace let out a sigh. “I mentioned that place to Kaiden, and now he wants to go there with his friends. He invited me as well.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Really? That’s amazing. You and Kaiden can be really good friends. I heard he likes video games and comics.”

Jace chuckled. “Yeah, we’re similar.”

I looked over at Kaiden, who gave me a quick smile.

I felt more at ease knowing Jace could make more friends-especially male ones. Not that we weren’t great company, but he needed friends of his own. He was the most loyal and honest friend anyone could have, always ready to help whenever someone needed him.

Only fools wouldn’t be friends with him.

“Pineapple on pizza should be considered a crime, Josh!” Emery’s sharp voice pulled me from my reverie. “I don’t know if I should hang out with a criminal.”

Josh gasped, touching his chest. “Excuse me, Miss, but I have a great lawyer. And I’ll stand by what I said. Pineapple on pizza forever .”

“You’re insane!” Emery exclaimed, laughing.

I don’t think our friend group could ever be less chaotic. It’s just who we were-the center of chaos.

“Josh, just because you make my sister laugh doesn’t mean I’ll allow you to date her,” Ricky suddenly said, his voice and facial expression dull.

Josh turned to him, his eyes narrowed. “With all due respect, your sister can decide for herself. She’s an adult. Have you forgotten her birthday?”

Ricky arched a brow. “No? It’s August ninth.”

“August tenth,” Mason murmured.

We all snapped our eyes to Mason, who just completely ruined his attempt to hide his secret crush.

“You once sent me to buy a cake for your sister.” Mason rubbed the back of his neck.

That boy can’t lie at all.

“Yeah, I remember now,” Ricky said, still glaring at Mason.

“He’s a bad brother then,” Jace whispered after being silent the whole time. “I have your birthday tattooed into my brain.”

I chuckled and caressed his cheek. My father was right. Jace was sometimes speaking nonsense.

The evening went on, and as I looked around at my friends, I realized I was the luckiest person in the world.

I had the best family and the most amazing boyfriend-I didn’t need anything more.

For the first time in a long time, I was truly happy.

THE END

⸻⸻

Hiii, thank you so much for reading my story. It means the world to me.

I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing it <3.

Jace and Freya have a special place in my heart .

Now, w

hat’s next?

Shadows of Temptation

, following Emery, Josh, and Mason

(for updates, follow me on IG, and yes, I’m planning to write even Jade’s story).

Check out my other works:

SCYTHE - Completed

His Secretary, Her Boss - Completed

Shadows of Obsession - Completed

bonus︱pearl

When the weather started to warm up, I brought Jace to the lake my father had always taken me to-a place filled with memories I never quite let go of.

It lay hidden among the woods, quiet and untouched. Not many people were aware of it. It was my father who discovered it first when he was my age.

He said that he and his friends were once chased through the forest by a dog, and because it was dark and they were scared it would bite their asses off, they panicked and fell into the lake one after another.

Thankfully, the dog was afraid of water, and my father’s life was saved.

Since then, they frequently went there for a swim, and they kept the lake a secret until my father brought me there.

During the drive, Jace talked about the universe and science. I honestly preferred it over music. He knew so many interesting facts and had his own opinions on them.

He explained that lightning is actually hotter than the surface of the sun, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and I also couldn’t imagine ever getting bored with him.

“Wow, Jace. You should be a teacher. You explain things so easily,” I said, staring ahead at the trees lining our path.

Jace gently clasped my hand, his grip firm. “Thank you. I’ve actually been considering it as a career. Since I started tutoring, I’ve realized how naturally it comes to me.”

I slowly dragged my nails along his forearms. “I’m happy for you. Should I start being more jealous? You’re already tutoring so many girls, and it’ll only get worse once you’re a professor.”

He shivered from my scratches, holding the steering wheel way too tightly.

“I don’t understand how you could think I’d look at another girl, when I’m constantly blushing when I’m with you.” Jace chuckled.

I frowned. “So? That doesn’t mean you can’t find other girls attractive and vice versa. I guess you don’t realize how hot you are, Jace. When we’re this close, all I can think about is being on top of you.”

Jace swerved the wheel slightly, and I burst out laughing.

“I can’t believe you’re still shy about discussing sex.”

“I’m s-sorry. For our safety, I’ll keep both hands on the wheel.”

I smiled to myself and realized we had finally reached our destination.

“You can park the car right here,” I suggested.

Jace listened and switched off the engine once he’d parked. I got out of first, gawking at the beautiful nature, especially at the wildflowers.

After admiring the view for a brief moment, I pulled the blanket and food from the trunk.

Before we came here, we cooked together at Jace’s house. Rose was at home, so she helped us with the tortillas.

I walked ahead since I knew the path well. I recalled all the memories with my dad, and I missed those times we spent together. When my mother got a bit crazy, he immediately drove us to the lake for a few hours, away from the chaos.

I’m forever grateful to my father. If it weren’t for him, I would’ve had awful teenage years.

And after what happened with Kayla at Jace’s house, Rose admitted that she contacted her lawyer for a no-contact order, so Kayla wouldn’t bother me anymore.

It finally made sense why she didn’t text me.

“Wait! Slow down, or you will fall.” Jace shouted after me, but I didn’t listen to him.

I’d never fallen on this path before.

When I reached the shore, I dropped the food and blanket on the grass and jumped into the lake.

I was only wearing a white spaghetti tank top and a maxi skirt. I didn’t care for a bra. Why should I? No one was here anyway.

After I swam to the surface, Jace was frowning at me, holding his hips.

I let out a laugh and beckoned him to join me.

He sighed and slid his T-shirt off before jumping into the lake after me.

For a moment, I panicked because I wasn’t sure if Jace knew how to swim properly, and because the water was so still, and I couldn’t see him.

But then I yelped as he wrapped his arms around my waist, lifting me above the water.

“Jace!” I screamed as he spun me around.

“You should’ve waited for me.” He laughed and pulled me to his chest, crashing his mouth against mine. He grabbed my ass, pulling me closer.

In these past few months, Jace became more comfortable touching me.

It was still weird, but in a good way, because every time he touched me in this daring way, a thrill tickled my spine.

“J-Jace.” I tried to pull away to take a breath, but he wouldn’t let me.

He bit my lower lip, nibbling it. I moaned in response, and he finally disconnected our mouths, moving under my jaw to give me hickeys.

I buried my fingers in his hair, tugging it.

Suddenly, Jace burst out laughing.

I pulled back, staring at him.

“Your hand…” He cleared his throat. “You tickled me.”

I arched a brow. “You’re so sensitive. Like everywhere .”

Jace turned red, suppressing a smile. I gazed into his big eyes that twinkled at me.

I’m one lucky girl to have him.

“I’m hungry. Let’s go eat,” Jace said and gave me a quick peck on the lips.

Of course, he wouldn’t let me swim back. I had to be carried like a princess.

If I’m honest, I enjoyed it way too much.

When we got out of the water, Jace gently placed me on the blanket and settled down very closely beside me. We got the tortillas out of the foil and ate without speaking. The food was so delicious.

We didn’t need to say anything. We just looked at each other and nodded-both thinking the same thing: we’re good at cooking.

I listened to the birds singing up in the trees, enjoying the light breeze against my skin. I missed this place. I should bring Dad here again.

From time to time, I sensed Jace glancing at me. That was something he continued to do.

“What?” I finally asked and looked at him.

Jace’s eyes dropped to my top. I ducked my head and finally understood why he couldn’t keep his eyes away.

“I’m so sorry, Freya,” Jace started. “I don’t want you to think that I’m only thinking about… those things when I’m with you, but it’s a struggle to ignore you.”

Ahh, he’ll be the death of me.

“Do you not know me? If I had a problem with it, I’d say something. And I don’t see anything wrong with being too attracted to your girlfriend. In my opinion, it’s very healthy that you want to fuck me all the time,” I proclaimed.

Jace’s eyes went wide.

“Freya!” he whisper-shouted. “W-What if someone heard you? This is so embarrassing.”

I laughed when he covered his face in his palms.

“First of all, no one is here. And second of all, I don’t give a fuck.” I grinned. “I want everyone to know that you’re mine and that you like me as no one else does.”

Jace raised his head and stared into my eyes for a few moments. Then he got up and moved behind me. When I felt his arms around my middle, I leaned against his chest and rested my head in the crook of his neck.

One of his hands went under my top and touched my wet breast. He held it, giving it a soft squeeze.

“You’re the most beautiful woman, Freya. Even if you stepped on me, I’d thank you.”

My heart skipped a beat.

“I’m starting to doubt that I’m your first girlfriend because you’re too damn good at this sweet talk.”

Jace kissed my temple and leaned his cheek against the side of my face.

“You are my one and only. I can’t wait to marry you, to see you in your wedding dress. God, I already want to cry. It’s going to be the happiest day of my life.”

All the hair on my body prickled.

Hearing Jace talk about marrying me so excitedly… I’d have never thought someone would love me that much.

I never considered it possible.

“I’m a little thirsty. I’ll go grab a water and be right back,” he added.

That pulled me from the trance.

“Oh, right. I forgot to take it.” I smiled, and Jace got up.

“That’s okay. I’ll get it.”

He strolled up the path to the car, and I let out a deep exhale, lying down.

One thing was for sure. I’d look super sexy in a white dress.

We didn’t need to rush with the wedding. First, we had to find out what we wanted to do in our lives.

Jace already got his answer.

And as for me…

Teaching dancing is what would make me happy. Dahlia and Yumei signed us into some dancing competition, so if we won, we could become backup dancers.

I could make a living out of my favorite hobby.

“Hey there.”

I opened my eyes to find myself staring straight into a stranger’s. I sprang up, staring at him.

“Sorry for startling you, but I just wanted to know if it’s allowed to fish here.”

He had dark brown hair and eyes, and he was probably my age.

“Uhm, I think so? My dad often fished here,” I said.

The guy stepped farther away, and I relaxed a little.

“Oh, thanks! I honestly can’t believe I found such a nice spot. It’s like nobody knows about this place.” He laughed.

I stretched my arms over my head, feeling a bit tired.

“Actually, this place is a secret. If you like the quietness, you’d better keep it to yourself.” I chuckled, flipping my hair to the other side. It was too heavy when it was wet.

The guy smiled, watching me far longer than necessary.

“I will. Thank you for telling me.”

He settled his things close to our blanket, and I frowned.

Why can’t men leave after a small chat? The shore is big enough for at least 50 people.

I glanced at our remaining tortillas, considering leaving.

“Hey,” the guy appeared in front of me, crouching down. “Do you like pancakes with honey? I packed too much with me.”

I usually don’t get startled that easily, but seeing him so close to me made me flinch.

“No, thanks,” I replied, my eyes narrowed.

He suddenly reached his hand to my leg, and that’s when I got up and heard Jace’s excited voice echo through the woods.

“Freya! You won’t believe what I found near the car-”

He cut himself off when he noticed the unfamiliar man in front of me.

Jace dropped the bottles of water to the ground and stormed toward me. In a quick stride, he shielded me with his back and grabbed my wrist.

“I’d appreciate it if you backed away from my girlfriend,” Jace seethed, and his deep voice shocked me.

I wouldn’t mind that tone in the bedroom.

“I’m sorry, man. I was just-”

“I don’t care,” Jace interrupted him. “Can you leave us alone?”

The guy mumbled something in response, but I was in awe of Jace’s possessive side. I thought he couldn’t get any hotter, but I was wrong.

He sighed, his shoulders tense. I hugged him from behind, and kissed his back.

“Weren’t you the one lecturing me in the car about jealously?” I taunted.

“Yeah…” He sounded disappointed with himself.

After that, we headed back to the car. The peaceful mood was ruined, and Jace also didn’t want the creep staring at my wet tank top.

“Oh my god!” I exclaimed, spotting a patch of white fur near the back wheel. “Is that a cat?!”

I crouched down, taking in the most beautiful white cat with striking blue eyes.

“That’s what I wanted to tell you. I was playing with her and couldn’t wait for you to see her,” Jace said.

I’ve always been a sucker for cats.

“Come here,” I whispered, and the cat slowly approached me.

She was a bit dirty and thin. But she didn’t look like a common breed, so someone must’ve left her here on purpose.

She sniffed my hand and then purred.

“Kitty!” I squeaked. “I really want to bring you home, but I can’t.”

Jace bent over and caressed the cat’s head. “We will keep her if you like her so much.”

My eyes widened. “Really!”

He tucked a curl behind my ear, staring intently into my eyes. “Anything to keep you smiling.”

The cat suddenly jumped into my lap and reached her paw to Jace.

“Hello, cute lady.” He shook her paw, smiling.

Fuck, Jace is the best guy in the entire universe.

And no, I’m not exaggerating.

Okay, maybe a little.

I guess this is what love does to you.

“Are you sure we can keep her?” I asked. “I mean, won’t Rose be mad? I can’t have any animals in my flat.”

Jace rubbed the cat’s ear. “My mom loves cats. She likes them more than dogs. And she won’t stay there for too long anyway. She will have a nice, big backyard and a lot of toys in our house.”

I snapped my gaze to Jace. “What do you mean?”

He glanced at me before he smirked. “We will bring her to our house after we get married, of course.”

Oh.

Ohh.

Jace gently picked up the cat and straightened to his full height.

“We should drive to a vet to get her checked out,” he added.

I blinked. “Y-Yeah. We should go there immediately.”

After Jace loaded everything into the trunk and settled the cat in the passenger seat, he walked toward me.

He cupped the back of my neck and pulled me into a kiss, his other hand sliding to my hip to draw me closer.

“Can’t you stop acting so surprised when I talk about living together?” he whispered, our foreheads pressed together. “Do you… hate it?”

I smiled. “Of course I do not, silly. I’m just not used to being treated like this.”

Jace rubbed my cheek with his thumb. “I’d give you the whole world if I could, Freya. Let me love you the way you deserve. Don’t fight it.”

“Alright.”

On the way to the vet, I gave the kitten some water and a bit of tortilla. She seemed to love being petted-she couldn’t stop purring.

“What should we call her?” I asked, caressing her head.

“Hmm, something that fits her,” Jace answered.

I stared at her for a couple of seconds, all the possible names whirling in my brain.

But only one stuck out to me the most.

“Pearl.”

Jace lifted our interlaced fingers and pressed a kiss to the back of my hand. “As you wish, my future wife.”

⸻⸻

Honestly, Jace is the perfect husband and totally my type, haha.

Shadows of Submission is now on Kindle!

Hey! I can’t thank you enough for putting so much of your time into reading my story. I can’t express with words how grateful I am.

I decided to publish Shadows of Submission on Kindle as an ebook, same as Shadows of Obsession.

If any of you use

Amazon

or

Goodreads

, please be so kind as to leave a review!

The link is in my bio.

Love u, xx.

Those of you who always commented, thank you again! You can find your usernames mentioned in the Acknowledgment :)