The Rozovsky Heirs 8: The Billionaire’s Lover

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THIS BOOK IS FOR MATURE READERS ONLY. IT CONTAINS FLAWED CHARACTERS, PROBLEMATIC SCENES AND EVOLVE ON A VERY DARK THEME. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.(R18)

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All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, distributed or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author.

This book is a work of fiction. All names, characters, locations and incidents are products of the author's imaginations. Any resemblance to actual persons, things, living or dead, locales or events is entirely coincidental.

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Date Started Writing: May 1, 2023
Date Finished: January 2, 2024

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# Synopsis

Synopsis

WARNING: MATURE CONTENT [ SPG | R18 ]

Being the only son of his billionaire father, Soronious Euxerre Rozovsky's responsibility was heavier compared to his sisters. That being said, he didn't say no when his parents matched him up with a decent girl who they said were perfect for him. 

Being an obedient son, he put up with the girl's bullshit even if it was already hate at first sight. He stayed and tried taming her thinking he could change her just like what his mother did to his father, but all of his plans and effort were put to waste when he met his fiancée's identical twin, Imogen.

Imogen Lauv Hoffman almost convinced Soronious to stop marrying her twin sister Imara because of their blossoming romance, but one drunken mistake lead him on getting the latter pregnant—and her heart shattered into bits of pieces.

Will Lauv let her feelings for Soronious go down the drain? Or will she stay and fight for him even if it only means being the billionaire's lover?

# PROLOGUE

Prologue

Soronious Euxerre Rozovsky

"I want you... all of you." I whispered softly against Imogen's ear as I pinned her to the door.

My hand had already unzipped the back of her red silk night gown. I gently pulled the straps off of her shoulders and let it freely dropped to the floor. My eyes burned with desire as I gazed to her perky breasts and her hard bright pink nipples eager for my uneven attention. I instantly felt my mouth salivate at that.

"God, you're a masterpiece, Lauv..." I continued mumbling-praising her wonders as my eyes locked on hers while my hands were already twisting, tweaking, caressing, and thumbing the perfect orbs.

"Eux... o-our family is just outside and—ahhh..."

She moaned after I pulled her by the waist and started attacking her begging mounds. I drew a nipple inside my mouth, I encircled my tongue around it and then gently sucked it. Tiningala ko siya. The sweetness of her skin were delicious—it made my cock as hard as a rock.

Ilang beses siyang napalunok nang panuorin akong ilapat ang dila sa gitna ng kanyang dibdib at taas-baba iyong iginalaw. Mga pigil na ungol na ang lumabas sa kanyang mga labi. Bumibilis ang pagtahip ng kanyang dibdib sa bawat pagdila ko't sipsip sa kanyang mga bundok.

While licking and sucking her nipples, I reached beneath the front of her thong. A smile immediately went across my lips when I felt her juice already coating her hairless flesh. My fingers found the top of her slit and the hood of her clit. She tried closing her legs, but my left knee was quick to stop her. Wala siyang nagawa kung hindi ang magpadala na lang sa sensasyong dulot ng bawat galaw ko sa kanyang katawan.

"Oh..." she muttered as my finger movement became more ragged on her dripping pussy.

She was resisting at first, but as my fingers moved playfully in her femininity, she eventually lost and let lust finally took over.

"Damn right. I know you've been wanting this, too, Lauv..." I hissed against her ear when she started grinding her soaking wet pussy on my fingers back and forth.

"I am literally going to hell because of this." nanghihina niyang sambit.

Her weak bedroom voice made me suck on her neck, purposely leaving a kiss mark on it. Iginapang ko ang mapaglarong dila hanggang sa maabot ko ang kanyang tainga.

"Then let's fucking go down there and claim the fucking throne. I'll worship you every goddamn second..."

"Ohhh... ohhh—Nio!" she moaned louder as her hips assumed a tempo of their own.

Sunod-sunod ang pag-ungol niya nang kusa nang pumasok ang gitnang daliri ko sa kanyang pagkababae dahil sa dulas. Patuloy kong hinalik-halikan ang kanyang leeg habang papalapit na niyang maabot ang rurok sa sariling pagsusumikap. I let her fuck my fingers lewdly.

"Do you want another finger inside you?"

"Put it inside... Let me fuck it... Ohhh!"

"Beg for it... tell me how much you want my fingers inside you."

"Please... I want your fingers inside me. I want you to fuck my pussy with it, please..."

I did. Hinayaan ko siyang malango sa sarap na dulot ng aking mga daliri hanggang sa unti-unti ay maramdaman ko nang lalabasan siya.

"I'm going to cum..." she groaned as her hips clenched and drove her pussy down my fingers but it looked  like it wasn't enough so I moved my hand against his pussy to finally put her misery to end.

Her abdomen and her legs shuddered as I began fucking her dripping flesh with my three middle fingers vigorously. Moments later, she was moaning in ecstasy. I moved my mouth back to her jiggling nipples as waves of orgasm rippled through her body. I didn't stop fucking her with my fingers until she finally squirted—my favorite scene of all.

"Ohhh! Ohhh! Eux!" Impit niyang hiyaw matapos akong mayakap nang mahigpit!

Basang-basa ang mga damit niyang nasa sahig maging ang pantalon ko sa dami ng likidong inilabas niya. It was the first time she squirted so much and it made her body so weak. Agad kong sinagot ang yakap niya bago pa siya malaglag sa sahig dahil sa panghihina. Ibinaon niya ang mukha sa aking leeg. Ang bawat paghinga ay parang apoy na tumutupok sa aking balat.

"That's quite a load." I playfully murmured against her ear. Maging 'yon ay marahan kong hinalik-halikan ulit.

"I'm sorry... I didn't control—"

"It's fucking hot, baby. I'm always looking forward in making you squirt."

"Stop. You know it cause us a problem now. Basa na ang dress ko at hindi ko na pwedeng isuot 'yan pabalik sa party."

"Then don't."

"H-huh?"

Imbes na sumagot ay walang sabi ko na lang siyang kinarga at muling idiniin sa dingding matapos niyang ilingkis ang mga paa sa aking bewang. Agad kong kinalas at inilabas ang pagkalalaki ko sa aking pantalon. I let her pulsating flesh feel my aching bulge. Sabik na sabik na sa kanya.

"S-Soronious—"

"Let's fucking stay here, Imogen. Forget the damn party and our family because I don't care anymore. Ikaw lang ang gusto ko ngayong gabi so let's make this night about us. Let's make this 
fucking
 night memorable..." I said before I finally slide my cock inside her still dripping and sensitive flesh—making her finally shut her mouth and just beg for my mercy as I send her back to heaven.

Full version of this story will only be posted on patreon and VIP group. Click the link on my bio to read this or message me for details.

CHAPTER 1

Chapter One

Worth Fighting For

My mother always told me that love was the most magical thing you’ll ever find in this lifetime. She said it was the center of all emotions kasi kapag nagmahal ka, you’ll feel everything. Sadness, happiness, anger, guilt, etc., Tanging iyon lang daw ang nagbubuklod sa mga emosyong ’yon dahil kapag hindi mo naman mahal ang isang tao ay wala kang magiging pakialam.

My parents were the only people I look up to when it comes to love. I know their history. Masalimuot pero nakakatuwang isipin na natalo nila ang lahat ng pagsubok sa buhay dahil sa matinding pagmamahal nila para sa isa’t isa at habang tumatagal pa ay pinatutunayan nilang tama ang desisyon nilang ayusin ang ipagpatuloy ang kanilang nasimulan lalo na para sa amin ng mga kapatid ko.

The happiness that I see in my parents were everything. Kahit ilang taon na ang nakalipas ay hindi nabawasan ang pagmamahal nila bagkus ay umuusbong pa ’yon sa paglipas ng panahon. It was like wine. Habang nabuburo ay lalong sumasarap. And I sometimes wished that someday I can find that same love, too. Cruel, challenging, whirlwind, but always worth fighting for.

Pangarap ko rin na makahanap ng babaeng gaya ni mommy na gagawin ang lahat hindi lang para sa alam niyang tama kung hindi para lalo sa ikabubuti ng lahat at ng kanyang mga anak. There was nothing more amazing than seeing a woman stand on her own and take responsibility for her actions. Sa panahon ngayon kasi ay madalang na ang makahanap ng babaeng magtatiyaga sa ’yo at mananatili sa tabi mo ano man ang mangyari. It was vice versa. Finding that one true love was just once in a lifetime. Kapag napalagpas mo ay hinding-hindi na kailanman babalik.

“You really have to date kuya.” napatuwid ako ng upo nang marinig ang boses ni Somerset na hindi ko namalayang nakapasok na pala sa loob ng opisina ko dahil sa tindi ng aking pagmumuni-muni.

“What do you want and why are you here?”

She laughed and sat on the chair in front of me. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

“I am, but answer my question.” matabang kong sagot sa kanya dahil alam kong may kailangan na naman ito.

And knowing Somerset, she never wanted something simple. And she didn’t also like taking no for an answer. Lalo na ang bagay na ’yon.

Pinigilan kong masapo ang ulo ko. Seeing her puppy face makes me want to punch myself hard because even if sometimes I didn’t want to approve her demands, I’d still end up saying yes. Wala eh. Lahat ng mga kapatid ko ay hindi ko magawang hindian.

“You’re being paranoid. Hindi ba pwedeng na-mi-miss lang kita kaya ako nandito?”

“Swear to me it’s just that before we get on talking.”

She smirked devilishly. Napailing na ako.

“Okay fine. I need you to give me at least thirty million pesos so I can start this new venture I have in mind.”

“Hit me.”

“Hmm, wait, maybe more? Okay, I little bit more that thirty.”

I heave a sigh. “Tell me everything about this venture and I’ll tell you my answer afterwards.”

Hindi ko akalaing mas bibigat pa ang ulo ko sa kanyang pagpapatuloy. The thirty million tripled in jusr the first two minutes of her speech.

I’m not going to lie, I applaud my sister for being business minded. Sa lahat ay siya iyong mahilig talaga sa negosyo simula bata pa lang. She loves bargaining, too. At the age of ten years old she already made millions by scalping concert tickets, electronics, shoes and everything in demand. A year after that, she used our father’s name to invest that money in real estate and now her mind and dreams were even larger than mine. Bukod sa successful na negosyo sa beauty industry na tinatangkilik ng buong bansa kahit sa karatig Asia ay hindi nito gustong matapos doon lang ang lahat.

She was a risk taker. If she saw some potential to a business, she’d go and invest in them. And so far, lahat ng kanyang pinapasukan ay nagiging successful. Iyon din siguro ang dahilan kung bakit mabilis niya akong napapapayag lalo na pagdating sa pera. Bukod kasi sa alam kong pinag-aaralan na niya ang isang bagay bago niya pasukin ay talagang walang negosyong hinahawakan niyang nalulugi. Lahat ay successful. Kaya rin nakakaganang mag-invest pero sa naririnig ko sa kanya ngayon ay parang gusto kong humindi.

Ilang beses akong napalunok dahil kahit na napakatalino ng kanyang perception at plano sa gagawin at hindi ko maiwasang kabahan para sa kanya.

“So? what do you say?” She asked after almost thirty minutes explaining to me where my money would go.

“I don’t think I can give you my decision now, Somerset. I have to confide with our father first—”

“No! That’s the point. That’s why I asked you and not dad because I want to keep it a secret first.”

“So you already know the answer is supposed to be a no, right?”

“I think I can only do a maybe.”

“Somerset.”

“Guns, armors, tanks, and everything a soldier needs to defend their country is everything kuya. Daddy knew the industry. He’d been there. He was successful at it until he was forced to leave that life for mommy—for all of us.”

“That’s the thing, Soms. He left it for a reason so we don’t have to be penetrated by the awfulness of that world.”

“Well I don’t have any reason to avoid it so help me. War is an economy and admit it, it’s fucking genius. This new venture will be everything to me.”

“It is genius, but—”

“Tell me maybe and I’ll be happy to accept it, nothing else.”

“I need to tell dad.”

“Kuya naman… I’ve been studying and planning this for months now. I even dig our father’s past and even grandpa. I already contacted our past employees, suppliers—”

“No, you did not.” napapaahon sa swivel chair kong sambit. “Somerset, tell me you didn’t.”

She leaned on her seat. She tried hiding the smug and proudness on her face, but she failed.

“Well…”

“I’ll definitely need to talk to dad. What you’re asking me is not just massive, but dangerous, too. You don’t know that world. And it’s a messy one.”

“But I know you agree that it’s a whole goddamn business! And I think it’ maybe best for one of us to go back and claim the throne our father abandoned.”

“He left it for us to live a more peaceful life.”

“So that’s why you’re staying on the safe side, too? Ayaw mong sundan ang mga yapak ni daddy noon? You just want to be the boring CEO of our hotel chains and multi-billion businesses which we all know that more than half of that riches came from the industry our father tried to bury?”

“He’ll kill us both, Somerset. Kapag nalaman niyang alam mo ang tungkol dito malalagot tayong pareho.”

My sister just smirked at that. “Alright, then multuhin na lang natin siya.”

Napailing ako pero gaya nga ng sabi ko, I just can’t say no to her. Hindi dahil marupok ako pagdating sa kanya kung hindi dahil alam kong kahit humindi ako ay gagawin niya pa rin ang gustong gawin. And once that happen, I would be out of it. Kaming lahat. And I don’t think I can let her do dangerous things without anyone knowing.

Ilang beses niya pa akong kinumbinsi pero naging matigas ako sa pagkakataong ito’t sinabing pag-iisipan ko kaya umalis siyang walang nakuhang sagot sa akin.

The Rozovsky Ltd., Our family’s company for generations supplies high caliber firearms, armors, tankers, and even nuclear weapons to any country that needs it until my father had to drop the illegal transactions to save us from any possible danger. Marami ng nangyaring hindi maganda sa pamilya namin lalo na noong nasa linya pa ng cocaine at illegal drugs ang ilan sa negosyo ng aming pamilya at iyon ang puno’t dulo ng lahat ng mga problema. Now that my father and the whole Rozovsky’s were not that much active on that lane to save our future generations, kahit paano ay malaki ang naging pagbabago. Iyon nga lang, hindi pa rin naiiwasan ang mga illegal lalo na ang iniisip ng kapatid ko.

Dealing with any government or anyone to supply armors for the war they’re trying to win will always be bloody. At talagang mapapatay ako ni dad kapag nalaman niyang susuportahan ko si Somerset sa bagay na ’yon.

I got out of my office to have an alone time. Minsan ay nag-ko-coffee ako sa labas ng mag-isa at kasama lang ang mga tauhan ko.

Vlasta, my right hand followed me when I went outside the house. I told him where we were going, but before we could go any further, natigil na ako sa paglalakad nang matanaw si mommy na pasalubong sa akin dala ang napakatamis na ngiti.

Oh crap… here we go again.

“Nio…” she called sweetly.

Sinagot ko ang kanyang ngiti at pagkatapos ay niyakap siya nang makalapit sa akin.

“Mom.”

Hindi pa man siya nakakapagsalita ulit at mukhang alam ko na kung saan patungo ang sasabihin niya.

“I am planning to have another charity event this month and I want you all to be there.”

“I’m going to check my—”

“Schedule first, mom.” she cut me off and completed my sentence. Napailing ako.

“This is not negotiable, Nio. I want you all to be there especially you so please don’t say no. You how important this is to me. Especially this one.”

She continued talking when she saw I wasn’t impressed.

“I’m currently working with this private organization who helped kids with all types of cancers to still have a meaningful and joyful life amidst their condition. This foudation really impressed me with their pitch and their background so I wanted to support their cause. Baby please don’t let the kids down. Your Uncle Zeke and Tita Bia are also going to be there so please say yes to me, son.”

I heave a sigh and just nodded at her. Kahit naman kasi anong gawin ko ay hindi ko naman siya kayang tanggihan lalo na ngayon sa sinabi niyang mga detalye. I need to research about that and I hope I’ll be impressed, too, so I wouldn’t waste my time letting my mom try to match me with anyone she thinks perfect for me. Alam kong iyon lang talaga ang purpose kung bakit niya ako gustong sumama.

“Alright mom. Just send my secretary the details and I’ll be there.”

Umabot hanggang sa tainga ang kanyang ngiti at walang sabi akong nayakap nang mahigpit!

“Oh thank you, kuya! Please do tell your siblings to come, too!”

I nodded. Nang hindi niya pa ako paalisin ay alam ko na ang tutumbukin ng mga susunod niyang salita.

“Mom please. Stop setting me up with a woman.”

“Why? As far as I can remember, you are still into one and you’re lucky I met someone yesterday to be your date! Wala ng bawian, ha! You already said yes to your mother.”

I knew it.

“Aren’t you getting tired setting me up? It’s been ages already at wala namang nangyayari. It’s still not my priority now—”

“Wait until you meet this one! Vlasta told me you’re into sassy girls and this one is just sassy enough for you. I’m sure you’re going to like her trust me!”

Awtomatikong lumipad ang matalim kong tingin kay Vlasta na agad namang nag-iwas ng tingin sa akin.

This traitor.

Napailing na lang ako. Dahil alam kong hindi naman titigil si mommy sa pangungulit ay wala na akong nagawa kung hindi ang sumang-ayon sa kanya kahit pa labag iyon sa akin.

“Seriously? Sassy girls?” nababaliwan kong tanong sa kanang kamay ko matapos makawala kay mommy.

Vlasta just shook his head and pretended he was not hearing me scold him. I can’t believe he sold me like that. Palibhasa isa ring gusto na akong mag-settle kaya nakikikuntsaba na sa mga magulang kong i-set up ako. Maswerte siya dahil wala ako sa mood na pagalitan siya dahil kung hindi ay buong araw kaming parehas na bad trip.

I tried getting the conversation with my mother off of my mind, but it just intensified in my head when we finally got to my favorite coffee shop to clear my mind.

There was another girl whom I’ll meet soon. I don’t know who she was, even her name, but fuck it. Nakakapagod mang makipagkilala dahil alam kong hindi pa rin ’yon uubra pero gagawin ko pa rin para kay mommy.

I’ll do everything for her and my father because they deserved everything. And I don’t want to be a disappointment. Alam kong tinutulungan lang nila ako kaya sa ngayon ay hahayaan ko na lang sila hanggang sa isang araw ay makita ko na ang babaeng para sa akin.

I wish I could meet her soon so this mess and the concern of my parents and family could finally end, too.

CHAPTER 2

Chapter Two

Universe

I didn’t like her.

Iyon kaagad ang naramdaman ko matapos pa lang akong ipakilala ng mga magulang ko sa babaeng nagngangalang Imara. Not because we were just both set up but because I just don’t. Hindi naman ako mapiling tao pero madalas na-ra-radar na kaagad ng pagkatao ko kung gusto o ayaw ko ang isang tao. In her case, unfortunately it was the latter. Her vibe was just off for me.

“So why are you single? You’re what? Thirties?”

“Late twenties.”

“I see. So bakit nga? I mean, you are literally the most sough bachelor in this country. Just being a Rozovksy is way too much of a great deal and I bet women are piling up just to have a taste, so why? Are you gay?”

The side of my lips rose at her last question. Pinigilan kong matawa sa walang amor niyang mga tanong. Mabuti at ipinanganak akong mahaba ang pasensiya kaya hindi ko siya nasagot ng pabalang.

“I’m not. I only enjoy a woman’s company and not because someone is single means they’re gay whatsoever.”

“So why are you still single nga? In your case, it’s not that hard to settle. Maraming babaeng nagkakandarapa sa mga gaya mo. Don’t tell me you’re a hopeless romantic who believes in fairytale and shit?”

“Why do you say it like it was the worst characteristic to have?”

“Because it literally is. Sa panahon ngayon and in our world, it’s either you marry for convenience or not. Hindi uso ang pag-aasawa dahil sa pagmamahal. It’s a bs thing of the oldies,” naiiling niyang nilingon ang mga magulang naming saktong nakatitig sa aming dalawa.

She smiled and waved back at them while she continued with her speech, “They act like cupids when it’s all bullshit. Fuck it.”

“How about you?”

Napabalik ang mga mata niya sa akin. She raised one of her eyebrow, “What about me?”

“Why are you single? Bakit ibinubugaw ka ng mga magulang mo sa ’kin? Are they tired of you?”

Nawala ang angas niya dahil sa aking diretsahang tanong. She paused for a bit and then laugh sarcastically.

“Look. I don’t like you, alright? And I will never like someone like you. Kahit ikaw na lang ang natitirang lalaki sa mundo, hinding-hindi kita papatulan. I don’t like soft-romantic guys so please tell your parents to stop hoping for the both of us because it will never happen.”

“Glad to hear that we’re on the same side, but if you hate me like that then you’re the one who should tell your parents about it. I wouldn’t waste my time telling mine about what you said. It’s bs.”

Tumalim ang titig niya sa akin at walang sabing natungga ang nasa harapang champagne.

“I hate men like you. Akala n’yo dahil sa estado n’yo ay kaya n’yo nang kontrolin ang mga tao. News flash, I wouldn’t be controlled by you and this conversation is over.”

“Thank God. It’s nice to meet you, too, Imara.” I answered sarcastically.

Inirapan niya ako’t inis na umalis sa kanyang kinauupuan. Saka lang ako nakahinga ng maluwag. The side of my lips rose when she finally was off of my radar. Finally. Someone who hates being told what to do and someone who actually hates me.

This was actually the first time it happened. Madalas kasi ang lahat ng mga babaeng inirereto sa akin ng mga magulang ko kahit ng mga kaibigan ay parang gusto na kaagad akong pakasalan sa unang pagkikita pa lang.

Imara was a different girl… but it was not in a good way and yes, I will never like her, too. I’m sure of it.

Buong gabi na niya akong iniwasan. Kahit nang kasama namin ang aming mga magulang ay hindi niya man lang ako tinapunan ng atensiyon kahit man lang bilang respeto sa mga magulang namin. I could feel her parents disappointment. Nahihiya rin para sa akin. Sa pag-alis nga nito ay agad nagpaumanhin ang dalawa. Glad my mother saved the conversation. Nakaalis din ako sa kanila.

I never thought I could feel more disappointed with the woman I met, but that feeling intensified when I saw her pulled a waiter to a dark hallway and before the curtains fall back, I saw her kiss him hungrily. And that type of kiss only lead to something I would never want to imagine.

I ripped my gaze off of their direction and tried concentrating to the party.

Perfect for me my ass. My mind spits bitterly. Yet again disappointed and kind of irritated at my parents for not knowing that word.

I don’t think I can ever be in a relationship with a girl who talks like that and give herself to literally anyone available. I need a wife and not a whore. Kahit ano pang ganda ng pamilyang pinanggalingan niya at kahit gaano ako kadesperado na bigyan ng panibagong henerasyon ang pamilya ko ay may karapatan pa rin naman akong mamili. At ngayon pa lang alam ko nang hindi iyon si Imara.

“What happened?” Bungad ni Somerset sa akin kinabukasan nang maabutan na naman ako sa aking opisina. “Bukod sa nalasing ka raw, anong nangyari at bakit parang hindi maganda ang feedback ni mommy sa inyong dalawa ni Imara?”

Great.

Ngayon na lang ako hindi nakadalo sa breakfast kaya alam kong ako ang naging topic nila buong durasyon no’n. I know that was the only reason why my sister was here.

“The rents were right. Imara is lovely kuya so where did it go wrong?” untag niya nang hindi ako nakasagot.

“Everything is just a mistake, Somerset. I don’t feel anything but dislike for that woman.”

“So it was hate at first sight?”

“Definitely.”

“Hate is a strong word. Hmm, you think it’s not because you actually like her and you’re just being hard because she said something that you find off?”

“I don’t like her at all,” I let out a sigh. Nalasing ako ng gabing ’yon dahil sa sobrang inis sa babae.

Yes people might say you hate someone you love, but that was not the case. I really don’t like her and I don’t wish for our path to meet again. Hindi ko alam kung saang parte ang sinasabi ng mga magulang kong perpekto ang babaeng ’yon para sa akin. We were clearly the opposite and this time, it will never work.

“Bakit ka nga pala nandito? What do you want?”

“Nothing.”

“Okay, then can you please leave me so I can finish all my work?”

“You really hate her ba talaga kuya o you’re just in denial? I mean, matagal na panahon na since you last had a girlfriend. You barely leave this place and even your office. Hindi kaya nawawala ka lang sa game kaya inaayawan mo kaagad si Imara? Mommy said she’s nice. Balita ko rin ay nasa construction company ang linya ng business ng kanilang pamilya. She’d be a good wife and I think the rents were right.”

“Since when did you like any woman our parents liked for me?”

Nakangisi siyang nangalumbaba sa aking harapan, muntik ko nang masungitan dahil nakakairita ang ngiti sa mga labi niya.

“You’re getting old. Daddy married mom during their early twenties and everyone expects you to do the same. I know you want them be proud of what you’re doing right now, but marrying someone should still be your priority. Aanhin mo ang successful na career kung wala ka namang asawang magiging kasangga mo sa lahat? You need to marry and you should start searching for the perfect girl because if not, I know you’ll be left with no choice but marry anyone our parents decided for you.”

Ayaw ko sanang magpadala sa mga salita ni Somerset, but she actually made sense. These past few years ay wala akong inatupag kung hindi ang kaliwa’t kanang trabaho. I may have bedded some women this year, but the amount was nothing compared to what I used to have years ago.

Hindi ko napigilang masahiin ang aking batok dahil sa pagbigat nito. Siguro nga kailangan ko nang unahin ulit ang sarili. I need to step back from working and just enjoy my youth a bit more. I wasn’t worried not marrying someone right now but since my love life became part of my family’s vocabulary, I’m honestly a bit pressured.

I called my friends that night to chill. They were surprised to hear me invite them to Black Rock, but I was the one who got more surprised when instead of only them, they bought their girlfriends along—making me think about how serious my case was.

I only have few friends right now. Five to be exact. Sov, Dex, Carter, Devon and the best player of the team Jacuun who bedded more girls when we were in college. Sa aming lahat ay siya ang tingin kong unang mag-si-settle because his fiancée was now pregnant with his first child.

I watched my friends and their partners mingled. Nakikisali ako sa usapan pero ang utak ko ay kusang lumilipad sa kung saan. Seeing them found the love they were not looking for made me a bit jealous especially because I was the most behave in the group. Ako iyong akala nila mag-aasawa at agad na susunod sa yapak ng ama ko tungkol sa pagpapamilya pero ngayon ay huling-huli na ako.

My father, Thelonious Auxerre Rozovsky made rounds of headline whether it be good or bad. He was a legend. Kilalang-kilala ito sa university at kahit sa business world. Maugong rin lalo na ang nangyaring pagtakas nito kay mommy sa gabi ng engagement party nito sa matandang politiko at ilang linggo lang ay nabalitang ikinasal na silang dalawa. It was one of the most iconic news about my parents. Everyone envy and love their love story. Hindi nila alam na marami ring napagdaanan ang mga magulang ko bago muling sumaya at umayon sa kanila ang tadhana ngayon.

Kahit na hindi ako komportableng pag-usapan ang love life ko ay wala na akong nagawa nang mapunta doon ang usapan. And as expected, their partners suggested their single friends to me. Um-oo na lang ako at buong gabi nang nilunod na lang ang sarili sa alak hanggang sa ako na lang at matira at ang kanang kamay kong si Vlasta. I asked him to join me, but he refused after drinking two bottles of beer. Understandable naman dahil trabaho niyang bantayan ako pero mas lalo lang umingay ang mga alalahanin sa utak ko nang wala na akong kainuman.

I felt like even though I was successful with the field I chosen and everyone applaud me for running my father’s multi-billion company, I am still left behind. All of my friends were now building their own family and I am here, still stuck being single and have no plans on settling down any time soon. Kahit ang paghahanap ng babaeng may potential na maging asawa ko ay wala akong amor.

I heave a sigh.

Sometimes, life really has its own way to make us feel like we lack everything the society requires. Minsan hindi nawawala ang pakiramdam na nahuhuli ka na sa lahat ng mga kakilala mo’t mga kaibigan. Sometimes you would feel sorry for yourself for taking a different path and for having a different goal than others because people tend to tell you it was not what you supposed to do.

Ito ang kailangan mong gawin, ganito ang kailangan mong tapusin, you should marry while you were young so you can still play with your kids while you’re still strong and other bullshit like that. But in reality, life was never a race and we are not in a competition. We have our own different and unique path to take. Hindi porket iyon ang nangyayari sa lahat ay iyon na rin ang dapat mangyari sa buhay mo.

I strongly believe that you don’t always have to blend in and do what everybody was doing because sometimes the universe only wants you to be you . To be contented and happy with the life you create for yourself. Walang pressure, walang restrictions, and always have an endless possibilities. I think life was meant to explore, to have fun, to learn, and to never compete with anyone but your old self.

I stopped feeling bad after I had that realization again. I affirmed myself that I was doing okay. I am on my own lane. I am moving forward. I maybe slow, but I’m getting there. And whatever the universe will take me, I’ll make sure I am ready.

Full version of this story will only be posted on Patreon and VIP group. Click the link on my bio to read this book or message me for details.

# CHAPTER 3

Chapter Three

Desperate

I became busy the next weeks, I almost forgot about my parents' failed matchmaking with me and that girl. Dahil aware at medyo na-bo-bother na rin talaga akong maging single, I started going out again. Sabi nga ng mga kapatid ko, hindi ko naman daw mahahanap sa opisina ko ang babaeng mapapangasawa ko. I need to go out and be back on my game—and so I did.

Sa mga sumunod na linggo ay tatlong babae ang nakilala ko. They were good women. May isang wife potential naman, but I was not into her. The conversations were dull. We were both boring together so it ended right after our first date. 

The other two were wild and was exactly my teenage self would want, but now that I am on my late twenties, my choice and standards on women changed, too. Hindi ko na lang gusto ng basta galing sa  maayos na pamilya, maganda, at may successful na career. I now opted for a woman who can converse with me even when I don't even feel like it. Iyong makukuha ang ugali ko. Iyong kaya akong intindihin at vise versa. I like our vibe to meet and everything else would just be a bonus. 

Marami naman na akong nakilala at naging girlfriend pa. I knew a lot of women who would die to be my wife, too, but none of them got my attention. Not in the way na pwede nang maging kasangga ko sa lahat at maging parte ng aming pamilya. I had one long time relationship, too, but it didn't work as well because she didn't get along with my sisters. 

I am aware that my siblings have attitude at makilatis talaga ang mga ito lalo na sa mga babaeng ipinakikilala ko except kay Nia na mabait at hinahayaan lang ako sa mga gusto ko. The two were supportive of me with that relationship especially the first few years. Kaya naman nilang mag-adjust sa kung sinong babae ang pipiliin ko dahil alam naman nilang kasiyahan ko 'yon at hindi ako mapipigilan pero nang si Nia na ang magsabing hindi niya talaga makakasundo ang long time girlfriend kong si Alodia ay doon na ako nagdesisyon na itigil.

I always value my family and their opinions more than anything else. Good thing I was still young back then. I moved past that and I learned so much pero hindi na rin nasundan ng seryoso matapos ang relasyong 'yon. As hard as it may be, I was still hoping that I could still find the perfect woman fit for me and who can blend in with my sisters and the whole Rozovsky clan. 

I laid back on my duties to make sure I'm working on that. My right hand, Vlasta, was supportive of me. Siya lang ang pinipili kong kasama madalas bukod sa mga pinsan ko dahil kahit na wala naman iyon sa kanila ay nahihiya pa rin akong nawawala ako sa ganito. My cousin's were good at handling women. Kung may deadline nga lang ang pag-aasawa ay mauuna pa ang mga ito kahit ang mga bata kaysa sa akin. Inaamin ko nang wala na talaga ako sa game. Pakiramdam ko ay bigla akong nalipasan sa ganito. And damn, I am struggling.

"How about that one?" Nia asked while secretly pointing her finger on the girl sitting three tables away from us. 

Nagyaya itong mag-dinner kami at dahil nagsawa na akong si Vlasta na lang palagi ang nakikita ay sumang-ayon na ako. And now we're at her favorite Italian restaurant. Masarap naman ang pagkain at masaya rin akong makasama siya dahil minsan na lang ito, pero nang mabuksan ulit ang topic tungkol sa huling failed attempt ng mga magulang kong hanapan ako ng babaeng makakasama sa hirap at ginhawa ay naging cupid na rin ang kakambal ko ilang minuto lang ang nakalipas.

"Of all people you're the least I expected to do this to me." I answered her. Humagikhik lang si Nia.

"Oh come on! I'm helping you. Ayaw ko namang nakikita kang pressured. You look stiff and all that after the night you failed to please our parents."

"Who told you I am?"

"You're my twin, Nio. Wala kang maitatago sa akin. Bukod sa alam ko ang mga responsibilidad mo lalo na sa pamilya natin, I could feel that there are things that keeps bothering you, too. At alam kong ang pag-aasawa 'yon lalo na't hindi mo na naman nagustohan ang ipinakilala sa 'yo nila mommy. We only have two years bago tayo mawala sa kalendaryo. It wasn't ideal for you to stay single at this point. You know the rules."

I just heave a sigh. Sometimes being her twin could be a blessing and a curse. This moment was the first one. Kahit paano ay dama kong may kakampi ako. May mas nakakaintindi.

"Look, I may not know how hard you're taking it, but don't force it. Let everything flow. Ayaw ko namang sa sobrang pagmamadali mong maghanap ay maling babae ang mahanap mo. Good things take time. Mas mahihirapan ka kapag ikinasal ka na sa maling tao. I think being single is still way better than being with the wrong person. Maiintindihan naman nila mommy at daddy, eh. Don't pressure yourself too much. Look at Uncle Stas. He's old when he met auntie Sofia."

"Thanks, but I'm okay. We shouldn't talk about me and that matter," I took a sip of my wine and continued with the conversation. "How's work? The galleries?"

"It's fine. The last exhibit in London is a success."

"I'm sorry I missed it."

"It's okay. I know you have so much on your plate right now. Marami pa namang susunod, doon ka na lang bumawi."

"You're the most talented among us, Nia. I sometimes envy how I didn't have a single talent and you've got it all."

"Stop. We're all talented and you know it. It's just that you guys didn't focus on it. Lalo na kayo ni Somerset. Mas gusto n'yong tahakin ang kay daddy while mine is a bit more laid back. I don't think kaya ko rin ang mga ginagawa n'yo. Same with Saryna. She has so many talents, but she's too focus on... just being herself. Enjoying her youth."

"But still, sa ating lahat ikaw talaga ang nakasalo ng lahat ng talent. Are you sure you're still single? You've been hailed as one of the best artists in this generation. Your artworks were being displayed all across Europe and your name is known all over the country. You're so famous, Nia."

"No I'm not. Stop exaggerating things."

Parehas kaming nangisi.

"Take it as a compliment. Be proud of your achievements because you deserved it."

"You're just saying that so we could stop talking about you and the pile of women who wanted to marry you if you just don't want to choose anymore."

Itinawa ko ang sagot do'n pero iginiit ko ang mga huling sinabi.

Nia was really one of the talented among us. Ilang beses itong nanalo sa cake decorating competition at mas nakilala pa noong college na kami. Mommy was the one who got her into baking. She was only thirteen when she painted an artwork on her cake and it went viral. Nagtuloy-tuloy naman 'yon hanggang sa magpinta na rin ito. She was not only doing it on canvass. She also has painted handbags, plates, cups that were being sold for thousand of dollars at ngayon nga ay kilala na hindi na lang dito sa bansa kung hindi sa iba pa lalo na sa Europa.

The dinner went well. Pagdating sa bahay ay minabuti ko munang magpahinga pero bago matulog ay nakatanggap ako ng text galing sa isang unknown number. I usually ignore and block messages coming from strangers, but for no apparent reason I opened the message and read it.

09111828293:

Hi! Are you busy tomorrow? Can we talk and hopefully start again?

Hindi rin ako nag-re-reply sa mga tulad nito pero sa kung anong dahilan ay nakita ko na lang ang sarili kong nagtitipa ng mensahe pabalik.

Ako:

Who's this?

09424828293:

It's Imara. I got your number from your mother. I know you don't expect my message and it's okay if you say no, but I'm hoping we could start over again and possibly be friends? I'm sorry for how I treated you the last time. Gusto ko lang makabawi and maybe start on the right foot this time?

Ilang beses kong inulit-ulit basahin ang text niyang 'yon. My head were swamped with unimaginable questions especially because I expected that night to be the last night we would meet and talk to each other and this message alone was weirding me out pero sa huli, nakita ko na lang din ang sarili kong pumapayag. Sumasang-ayon kahit pa nagtatalo ang utak ko at higit sa kalahati ang nagsasabing huwag ko nang i-entertain ang babae.

Did I really lose my game and now being desperate? Oh damn.

# CHAPTER 4

Chapter Four

Believe In Love

I prepared myself for the day of our meeting. I wore my most expensive clothes, put on my most expensive perfume, got my hair cut, shaved my stubble, and be as pleasing as I can be.
 
I really did prepare for it and I never did this for any girl before, kahit iyong mga naging ka-relasyon ko. Ni hindi ko ma-imagine na gagawin ko rin ito lalo na para sa babaeng 'yon.

I dismissed Vlasta's comment when he saw me. I dismissed every word he might say because I know I did extra today even though I don't know what will happen with the meeting. 

I contemplated with her invitation all night. Hati pa rin ang opinyon ko sa gagawin hanggang sa mga oras ng aming pagkikita pero may kung ano sa akin ang gustong mag-expect na magiging maayos ang lahat ng pag-uusap namin ngayon. 

I will not lie. Imara was a gorgeous woman. She came from wealthy and powerful family. Nirerespeto ng mga nasa hanay namin ang kanilang pamilya at siguro kung hindi lang ako na-turn off noong unang beses at hindi gano'n ang ugali niya ay baka sana nag-work kami. Maybe we're actually dating by now if I didn't find her personality off. 

"Are you hundred percent now boss? I can still turn the car around if you like." Vlasta said, now smiling from ear to ear as he glance at me through the rearview mirror.

I just shook my head and dismissed him again. Natawa lang ito at hindi na ako kinulit pa. I got off my car. Diretso akong pumasok sa fire palace. Staff were greeting me. Someone ushered me inside the restaurant and told me my date wasn't there yet. I thanked him and got on my seat after ordering some bourbon. 

Fifteen minutes passed, I was still alone. Naka-dalawang baso na ako ay wala pa ang babae. I stopped myself from texting her dahil baka magmukha akong excited kaya hinayaan ko lang. I texted my sister instead.

Ako:

Where you at? You're still not home, right?

Nia:

Yes, why? What are you up to Eux? And why are you texting me? Don't tell me your phone got stolen? This isn't you right?

I continued replying to my sister. Hindi lang dahil bored ako kung hindi dahil siya ang back-up plan ko kung sakaling pinag-trip-an lang pala ako ng babae at walang balak na siputin. 

Why didn't I think of that before agreeing to meet her? Damn.

Ako:

It is me. Just asking. Ano nga? Are you still out? do you wanna hang or something?

Nia:

I just called Soms. Wala ka raw sa bahay? Where are you?

Ako:

Just out. Ano nga? Are you up? My treat.

Nia:

Of course it's your treat! Unfortunately, I'm busy right now so not unless you tell me what are you up to or give me a valid reason why are you suddenly asking me out then I might say pass.

I heave a sigh and ask for another glass of bourbon. I closed my sister's text to see if there's text from Imara, but that just caused me to curse again when I saw none. I was about to give up and tell my sister the whole story regardless of shaming myself, but all of that was put to halt when a woman's shadow hover me.

My hands automatically let go of my phone as my eyes run up to this gorgeous woman who was now in front of me. Wala sa sarili't lutang akong napatayo matapos tuluyang itigil ang mga mata sa kanya. 

Her eyes were beaming. The pastel pink dress she was wearing was making her whole beauty and aura glow so much. And when her lips finally curved, I totally lost it. Tuluyan na akong natulala sa kanya as if my whole world suddenly stop revolving and all I could do was swallow the bile on my throat as I try to remain my eyes locked on her and sanity intact.

This was nothing like the first time we met. She was beautiful that night, but it was nothing compared to her presence right now. Para bang may nakaalalay sa kanyang mga anghel ngayon para maging ganito ang reaksiyon ko't pagkamangha sa kanya. 

Compared to our first meeting, her make up wasn't that heavy, too, and it was such a game changer. Parang ibang tao ang kaharap ko ngayon at ito pa lang ang una naming pagkikita.

"I'm sorry I'm late. Na-traffic kasi kami. I'm really sorry!" sa paglinaw ng kanyang malambing at banayad na boses sa aking tainga ay saka lang ako binalikan ng katinuan.

"I-it's fine. Kararating ko lang din so don't think about it." I lied.

Inalalayan ko siyang makaupo. I got back on my seat after doing it. Hindi pa rin nawala ang pagkamangha sa akin habang muli siyang tinititigan. 

She has a fair complexion. A pair of perfectly arched and well-maintained eyebrows were complimenting her long natural eyelashes. Her brown eyes were beaming as if they were stars dancing in a dark sky. Her cute button nose was elegant, her set of heavenly-white teeth gleamed as she speak and heart shaped lips was already making me drool. Everything right now was mesmerizing me and I couldn't stop myself from praising each and every part of her face.

"I-I'm sorry! Am I talking too much? Sorry I'm being talkative when I'm nervous. You can stop me anytime. I'm sorry."

"No please, don't be. I like hearing your voice."

The instant blush on her cheeks because of my words became too obvious. Napangiti na rin ako ng wala sa oras. 

Damn, she's cute. 

But wait, did she bumped her head or something? Bangag ba siya no'ng una kaming magkita? Because clearly, she never became this talkative. Iba ang paraan ng pakikipag-usap niya sa akin at mukhang wala itong balak na sigawan ako't sungitan ngayon gaya noong huli.

Why is she being nice all of a sudden? And why does it feel like she already forgot about me and our past interaction? And lastly... why and how did she became instantly beautiful in my eyes?

Hindi natigil ang mga mata ko sa pagtitig sa kanya habang nagpapatuloy siyang magsalita upang iwasang mamula lalo na dahil sa mga titig ko. I continued smiling and watching her as if she was a very important lesson I shouldn't miss. 

My mind couldn't stop praising her in each second. Parang noong nakaraan lang ay isinusuka ko ang kabuuan niya, ngayon ay walang tigil ko na itong sinasamba.

The food was served and we ate in peace. Patuloy pa rin kami sa mga kaswal na pag-uusap. She asked about my parents and my family and I did the same. Though we already knew the background of our families, naging maayos pa rin ang mga unang topic tungkol doon at sa kung anong mga kanya-kanya naming pinagkakaabalahan hanggang sa mapunta na ang usapan sa una naming pagkikita.

"I'm sorry I was rude the last time. Kaya ko gustong hingin ang pagkakataong 'to dahil gusto ko talagang humingi ng paumanhin sa inasta ko't mga nasabi ng gabing 'yon. I'm sorry I was rude to you."

"No, it's fine. I was rude to you too."

Mas tumamis ang mga ngiti niya sa aking sagot.

"So, why are you really single? I mean, I heard your name and how great you are before we even met the first time. May mga nakilala rin akong gustong-gusto kang makilala at sobra pa and I guess that's just few of them so why? Is this a personal choice? Like career muna bago love life?"

Sa hindi malamang dahilan, nagawa kong maging totoo at sagutin ang kanyang tanong ng mga nararapat at walang filter na sagot.

"It wasn't my choice. In fact, I want to have a relationship now. I'm searching for it. I realized spending time in the office will not make me happy in the long run and I really need a wife so there's that. I was never close-minded when it comes to having a relationship, but I set that aside the past years I was thriving at work. Ngayon ko na lang ulit napagtuonan ng pansin. That explains my parents, especially my mom setting us up."

"Yeah! I totally get it. It is your mom."

I nodded. "How about you? Are you really single o napipilitan ka lang or pressured dahil gusto rin ng parents mong mag-click tayo? You don't have to force yourself if you are not comfortable with this—"

"No! I really want to know you more. Hindi naman siguro masama since we're technically both single? Besides, we really came off the wrong foot and I want us to give another chance... I mean, if that's okay with you?"

"Of course. I'm glad to hear you ask me out."

She giggled. "I'm pretty sure hindi naman na bago 'yon sa 'yo?"

I shook my head. "Not really."

"I reckon."

I asked her about her work. She told me she was working with her father run their hotel chains. Hindi pa raw siya magaling, but she was getting the hang of it.

"So you're like his successor?"

"Yes. That's why I'm always grumpy and a bit rude all the time. Siguro dahil na rin nga sa pressure. Bukod sa trabaho kasi gusto na rin nila akong mag-asawa. They tried setting me up with almost everyone available, but it never worked. Kaya sorry talaga kung hindi naging maganda ang pagkikita natin noon. I'm really sorry."

"Stop apologizing now. I totally get it. We're basically on the same side so I understand the pressure."

"Thank you. Back to the question, since naghahanap ka na, wala pa rin ba? Are you choosy or something?"

"Call me romantic, but I still wish that I'll marry a woman whom my heart really wants and not just a random rich girl my parents approved."

Doon nawala ang kanyang mga ngiti. Tila ba ang paglalim ng aking mga salita ay hindi niya inakala.

"So you're not into flings and stuff anymore? Like gusto mo kapag nagkaro'n ka ng bagong ka-relasyon iyong sa taong mapapangasawa mo na? At mahal mo?"

"Yes."

"But you know love is not easy to find nowadays. What if it'll make you wait? Hanggang kailan mo kayang maghintay para do'n?"

Nagkibit ako ng balikat. Napainom din ng alak dahil hindi ko inasahang magiging interesado siya sa topic tungkol sa love. I was trying to turn her off, but I don't think it will happen. Hindi gaya noon, ang babaeng kaharap ko ngayon ay mukhang gusto at handang makinig sa lahat. 

"I believe love is not just a feeling. You should also work on it to happen. Kailangang mag-adjust or even maghintay. If I know it was the love I want for myself then I'll wait no matter how long."

She was speechless to that.

"Don't you believe in love?"

She was still on pause. Nag-iisip. Sa muli niyang pagngiti ay nabanaag ko ang lungkot sa kanyang mga mata.

"I want to, but I don't think it's possible especially for people like us na walang choice kung hindi arrange marriage madalas. Wala masyadong freedom sa pagpili ng taong mamahalin. I sometimes think love is only to those who were lucky at hindi 'yon para sa lahat."

I just looked at her, still charmed by her presence. Sa hindi ko malamang dahilan ay nagawa kong lumapit sa lamesa at walang sabing inabot ang kanyang kamay. She gasped when her eyes darted on me, muli ay namula ang kanyang magkabilang pisngi. 

I slowly run my thumb on her hand and smiled genuinely at her, "Is that so? Do you want me to make you believe in love? Gusto mo bang subukan natin?"

Full version of this story will only be posted on Patreon and VIP group. Click the link on my bio to read this book or message me for details.

CHAPTER 5

Chapter Five

Bad Liar

“I want to see her again.” ’yan ang mga unang salitang lumabas sa aking bibig sa panibagong araw matapos ang pagkikita namin ni Imara.

Halos lumuwa ang mga mata ni Somerset sa aking sinabi. Muntik pa siyang mabulunan.

“W-what?”

Last day I was ranting about how awful that girl was and now I was telling her I wanted to see her again. I know it was really fucked up, but after that interaction last night, I feel like there was a chance. Na baka masyado lang kaming parehas judgemental at mainit ang ulo sa una naming pagkikita kaya hindi kami nagkaintindihan. She was not in her right mind when she hooked up with the waiter, but everything that happen in that party didn’t matter to me anymore. As if the five hours I was with her was enough for me to forget all that.

“Am I hearing that right kuya? You want to see the girl you just told me you hated so much?”

“We met again last night.”

Tuluyan na niyang nabitiwan ang hawak na mga utensils. I was glad kaming dalawa lang ngayon ang nasa hapag dahil parehas kaming late nang nagising at wala na ang iba pa naming pamilya dahil kung hindi ay baka maging topic ’yon ng mga kapatid ko hindi lang buong araw kung hindi linggo.

“Y-you met with her again? How did that happen? Knowing how mad and turned off you are after the party, paano mo nagawang makipagkita ulit sa kanya?”

“She texted me and ask me for another chance. I agreed and she apologize. And honestly, I had the best night with her and I never had that connection for such a long time now.”

Hindi agad nakapagsalita ang kapatid ko. That gave me time to reminisce one of the most entertaining night of my life… with Imara.

“W-what do you mean…”

I pulled my hands away from her, hindi ko rin inasahang gano’n ang iaasta ko. I never done that to any girls I met. I never became too cheesy with my lines, too, and that made my lungs hard to breath I needed to pull away and laugh a little.

“I’m just saying that I’m a believer of love and maybe I can help you believe in it, too. We’re both single and our parents wanted us to be together so maybe we can give it a shot?”

“R-right…” may pag-aalinlangan siyang tumawa, ang mga pisngi ay pulang-pula pa rin.

“You’re too good at this. Baka lang napipilitan ka at mapasubo ka kung gagawin mo. I mean, bukod sa akin alam kong marami ka pang choices—”

“Do you have a lot of choices, too?”

That made her pause. Inayos ko ang pagkakahilig sa lamesa upang ipirmi ang mga malamlam kong mga mata sa kanya.

God, I really wanted this woman. I know it’s too early to tell, but I never liked anyone like this. I was enchanted by her beauty and I don’t know if I can let this one missed.

“If yes, may I know who they are?”

“N-no. I don’t actually have a lot of choices when it comes to this.”

“So I’m lucky I was your only choice then?”

That put her sweet smile back on her lips.

“You’re really good at this, Soronious.”

“Eux, you can just call me that.”

“Right, Eux. I honestly like you tonight. We really messed it up the first time and I hope this isn’t the last. Sana hindi ka lang napipilitan ngayon.”

“No, no. It’s the opposite actually. I never expected us to have a chill conversation and I like it. This is clearly not that last. I mean, kung okay lang sa ’yo?”

“Of course. I really like to know you more. You seems perfect. No wonder why my parents keep talking about you.”

“I’m not. But really? They are talking about me?”

“Constantly. Walang tigil ang mga ’yon dahil manghang-mangha sa ’yo lalo na si daddy. He’s really amazed by you especially because of the success you did as a successor of your father and you did it in such a young age. Walang bukambibig si daddy kung gaano ka kagaling pagdating sa paghawak ng negosyo. My father said you once had a meeting with him but he turned down the project because he doesn’t want to risk it lalo na’t bago ka pa lang sa industriya ng hotel and restaurant, but look at you now thriving. You’re one in a million he said.”

“And what do you think of that? Are you annoyed hearing my name?”

“No! Of course not! I’m with him, Eux. Your success is really outstanding and I really like how you involve yourself in charity stuff. I mean, nakakamangha na kahit do’n may oras ka pa.”

“It’s my mom. She likes doing it to give back to the community and sometimes she asked for my presence just for display.”

She giggled. “And you’re humble, too. I like that.”

“I don’t have time to brag, I guess.”

“Because you don’t have to. Your surname will automatically do that for you. It’s already a flex.”

“Oh yeah?”

She nodded vehemently.

“Do you want to have it, too?” nakangisi kong tanong dahilan para makagat na niya ang kanyang namumula’t mapang-akit na mga labi.

“Hey! Are you daydreaming?!”

Marahas akong napatuwid ng upo matapos umalingawngaw ang mga salita ng kapatid kong humila sa akin sa kasalukuyan.

I cleared my throat. Wala sa sariling napainom din ng tubig dahil sa kaba at pagkakahuli niya sa aking nababaliw na yata dahil kay Imara.

“Oh shit… You’re clearly daydreaming kuya! Talagang tinamaan ka sa babaeng ’yon at mukhang malala ang tama!”

“Stop. I’m just too pre-occupied with work. That’s it.”

“You’re such a bad liar! Hindi bagay sa ’yo.”

I just shook my head as I finish my food. Hinayaan kong asarin ako ni Somerset hanggang sa matapos kaming parehas. Even when I left home, she made sure I was entertained by her messages. Marami siyang mga katanungan tungkol sa babae. I bet she had her research about Imara by now. At alam kong ngayon pa lang ay dapat na akong maghanda dahil mamaya ay kalat na ang mga pinag-usapan namin sa dalawa ko pang kapatid. I just hope it wouldn’t reach our mother. Malalagot ako at baka lalong ma-pressure kapag nalaman niyang naulit ang pagkikita namin ni Imara at may positibo nang reaksiyon sa aming dalawa.

Naging abala ako sa trabaho. I then went to play golf after five hours at the office. I need to chill more. Iniiwasan kong magbabad na naman sa trabaho dahil baka doon muling maubos ang oras ko.

I sent Imara a good morning text earlier pero dahil walang sagot ay hindi ko na muna kinulit. Kalahati ng puso at isip ko ang umaasang mag-ti-text siya pabalik para muli ko siyang makausap. Naging maayos naman ang lahat kagabi at masaya kaming naghiwalay. I was just anxious why she wasn’t texting me back. Saka lang ako nakahinga ng maluwag nang tumunog ang telepono ko’t lumabas ang pangalan niya.

Imara:

Hey! Sorry I left my phone at home. Kauuwi ko lang din. How’s your day?

Walang sabi kong binitiwan ang hawak na golf club at hinayaan si Vlasta na pulutin iyon matapos kong senyasan na siya na ang magpatuloy ng nilalaro ko.

I sat back on the golf cart. Gamit ang dalawang kamay, nagtipa ako ng reply kay Imara habang parang teenager na abot tainga ang mga ngiti.

Ako:

Nothing. Just playing golf right now. How’s yours?

Imara:

Tired. Maraming meetings and I have a three day conference next week so I’ll be more busy.

Ako:

Oh, I see. I’m up if you need to chill before that though. Just let me know.

Imara:

That’s so kind of you. Are you free tomorrow?

I replied right away kahit na kaliwa’t kanan din ang meetings ko.

Ako:

Yes and I’m free even the day after tomorrow. Where do you want to go?

Imara:

What’s on your mind?

Ako:

Hearing your voice right now. Can I call you?

Imbes na mag-reply ay parang may kung anong tumalon sa puso ko nang makitang siya na mismo ang tumatawag sa akin ngayon! I hurriedly answered it.

“Hey!”

“Hi Eux! Are you sure hindi ka busy at pwede tayong lumabas?”

“Oo naman. Where do you want to go? I’m up wherever and whatever you want to do.”

“Are you an extreme guy? I mean do you like adventure?”

“What kind of adventure?”

“Do you like the ocean?”

“I’m a great diver when I was in college. How about you? Do you like the ocean?” humigpit ang kapit ko sa aking cell phone at binalewala ang nakangising mukha ni Vlasta nang lingunin ako’t mahuling ngising-ngisi.

“Yes, I do. Ocean is my therapy kung hindi mo naitatanong. I always go to the beach whenever I’m stressed.”

“Are you stressed right now? Do you want me to schedule a flight to El Nido tomorrow? Saan mo gustong pumunta?”

“No, Eux! Oh God, nakakahiya sa ’yo—”

“I want to see you again, Imara…” I cut her off. “So please let me have the honor of doing this just so I can let that happen. Please don’t make me beg you so much because even though I am not that kind of man, I damn willing to do it just to share a moment and be with you again…” seryoso ko nang sabi, hindi na napigilan ang sarili dahil ang totoo ay pakiramdam ko sinasakal ako ngayong kausap siya pero hindi nakikita ang kanyang kabuuan.

I missed seeing her face. The way she blushed every time I say something sweet. I missed praising her. And I really want to see her again. Kung pwede nga lang ngayon, kung hindi masyadong kabaliwan ay pupuntahan ko talaga siya.

“O-okay… let’s go to El Nido tomorrow then.” she answered sweetly I almost jumped because of too much happiness.

Damn, is this already love?

CHAPTER 6

Chapter Six

Moment With You

I immediately called my secretary to schedule a private jet to El Nido tomorrow and told her it was just pure business. Sa ngayon ay ayaw ko munang malaman ng mga magulang ko ang tungkol sa pag-iigihan namin ni Imara. Kahit na natutuwa ako at gusto ko talagang pagtuonan ng pansin ang sinisimulan namin ay ayaw ko munang sabihin sa kanila dahil ayaw kong mag-expect sila kung sakaling may mangyaring taliwas sa plano. I want to keep it to myself until I was sure she was the one I really like to marry and be with until my end.

“You still have time to back out. Baka napipilitan ka lang…” Imara trailed off while I greet her with a hug.

I was glad hindi niya ako pinakaba dahil hindi siya na-late ngayon at maaga pa ng sampung minuto sa oras n pinag-usapan namin. Vlasta took her luggage. Hindi naman ako umalis sa tabi niya matapos siyang yakapin.

“I’m not. I’m actually looking forward to this the whole night.”

She smiled at me. “You’re really this honest, huh?”

“My sister told me I am a bad liar so I don’t even want to try.”

“Oh right. You have what? Three sisters?”

“Yeah.”

“How was it? I mean, buti hindi sila nakikialam sa love life mo?”

“You don’t have any idea about that.”

“So they know me? Did they tell you to run away from me or something?” she joked. Natawa lang ako.

“I don’t think I can ran away anymore. Besides, it’s my choice kahit hindi nila gusto. Kapag sinabi kong gusto kita wala na silang magagawa.”

Kumalat ang pamumula sa kanyang magkabilang pisngi. Mabuti na lang at binalikan na kami ng mga staff para sabihing handa na ang gagamitin naming private jet.

Naputol sandali ang aming pag-uusap. Buong durasyon ko siyang inalalayan. Nang makapasok na sa loob ay agad siyang sinalubong ng bulaklak nang makakasama naming stewardess. She was so happy when she turned to me while hugging the flowers I prepared for her.

“This is beautiful, thank you.”

“I’m happy you liked it.”

Inalalayan ko siya hanggang pag-upo. I was a natural gentleman so it was not hard for me to do it and take care of her, she was so pleased by it. Para bang ito ang unang beses niyang naranasan ang ganito sa isang lalaki. No wonder why. She maybe realized I was nothing compared to any men she dated so she gave me a chance. Kung ano man ’yon, sisiguraduhin kong iba pa rin ako sa kahit na sinong lalaking dumaan sa buhay niya.

“Are you okay? Natahimik ka.”

Agad akong ngumiti. Inayos ang upo sa kanyang harapan. Hindi ko na namalayang nag-iinit ang ulo ko sa mga naiisip. Just by thinking about her dating someone and being with another man pisses me off. And I was never a jealous type. Maluwag akong maging boyfriend. I always support whatever my girl wants even though sometimes I don’t agree with it. Basta makita kong masaya siya ay sige lang ako.

“I’m fine. Do you want anything? Champagne? Coffee? Anything?”

“Champagne is fine.”

Agad na tumalima ang stewardess na palapit na sa amin matapos marinig ang sinabi ni Imara. We had a light snack during our flight. Masyado pang maaga ang byahe namin at wala pang araw dahil gusto kong sa villa na kami mag-breakfast habang pasikat ang araw.

My father bought a property and built a house few miles away from the busy town of El Nido and it has such a great view of the ocean. Maging ang sunrise ay napakaganda sa parteng ’yon.

We had casual conversation during our flight. She told me how excited she was and I told her the same. Not because I missed going to the beach, but because I am with her. Ang interaksiyon na ito kasama siya ay ang sobrang nagpapasaya sa akin.

“This is nice…” namamanghang sambit niya matapos kaming makarating sa villa.

It was well maintained. Matagal na akong hindi nakapunta rito dahil sobrang naging abala ako sa trabaho, but it was still the same. The villa that was made of glass was still stunning. My father really put all his efforts to it. Mas pinalaki ang infinity pool and the caretaker planted more plants to make it more cozy and pleasing. Mas natuwa ako nang makitang tuwang-tuwa si Imara sa nadatnan.

“This is nice. I was thinking of buying a property here too, but I never had a chance to do it. Ilang taon na simula nang huling beses na makapunta ako sa El Nido. I’ve been here thrice pero sa lahat ng napuntahan kong lugar ay dito ko pa rin gustong bumalik-balik. There’s really something in this place that keeps me coming back. Kung pwede lang buwan-buwan akong babalik…”

“Then come back here. You can use the villa anytime you want.” marahan kong sagot habang dinadaluhan siya sa veranda.

Something pinched my heart when she ripped her eyes off of the ocean so she can look into my eyes. Nagningning ang kanyang mga mata pero hindi ko mawari kung dahil sa tuwa ba iyon o lungkot.

“That’s too much, Eux. Bringing me here is enough.”

“No, I insist. Isa pa, wala namang masyadong gumagamit nito,” saktong dumaan ang isa sa mga caretaker ng lugar kaya ito ang binalingan ko.

“How long since someone visited this place Delia?”

Ngumiti ang babae at bahagyang lumapit sa amin. “Ngayon na lang ulit Sir Eux. Ang huli ay noong nakaraang dalawang taon pa yata.”

I thanked the lady and turned my attention back to Imara.

“See?”

“But still, nakakahiya naman kung ipapagamit mo sa akin. It’s okay. This is fine. I’m thankful for this.”

Napapitlag siya nang walang sabi ko nang hawakan ang kanyang kamay. She didn’t expect me to do that. Kahit na parehas kaming tila nakuryente sa aking ginawa ay hindi ako bumitiw.

“Make use of the place. Nasasayangan din ako dahil hindi nagagamit. Ilang beses ko nang sinabi sa mga magulang kong i-lease ang lugar pero ayaw nila. My father said he built it for my mom so he would never have someone live here. I understand, but I still hated the idea so you, using it would give me such a relief. Use it anytime you want, Imara.”

Kahit na may pag-aalinlangan pa rin ay wala na siyang nagawa kung hindi ang tumango at sumang-ayon para lang mapagbigyan ako.

“Thank you, Euxerre.”

I bit my lip at that. Happy she finally agreed.

“I am always weirded out whenever someone calls me that, but I like hearing it from you.”

“I’m sorry—”

“No please, don’t be,” I heave a sigh, hindi na binitiwan ang kanyang kamay. “Shall we have breakfast now? The sun is about to rise.”

“Thank you, Euxerre. This means so much to me.”

“You don’t have any idea how this is making me happy, too. Kain na tayo?”

She nodded. Habang naglalakad papasok sa loob ay walang tigil siya sa pagkamangha sa bawat nadaraanan ng lugar. She really loves the ocean and everything in it so she was so happy to see the pond and the fishes swimming around. Ipinangako kong ililibot siya sa buong villa pagkatapos naming kumain.

Hindi pa man opisyal na nag-uumpisa ang araw namin ni Imara ay sobra-sobrang tuwa na ang nararamdaman ko. I knew I did the right thing of asking her here. Sa kasiyahang nakikita ko sa kanya ay solve na ako.

Parehas kaming masaya habang nasa hapag. The food and conversation was great, but the sunrise interrupted us for a moment. Hinayaan ko siyang tumayo upang kunan ng mga litrato ang paangat na araw. I just watched her at first, but when I saw her being emotional and so thankful of me, hindi ko na napigilang kunin din ang aking cellphone. Hindi para kunan ang araw kung hindi siya. Sa buong durasyon nga no’n ay sa kanya lang nakatutok ang aking mga mata. Yes the sun was amazing, but her presence was more captivating.

Damn, this must be what my father felt for mom. Ang sabi ni mommy ay sobrang naging in-denial daw si daddy at ginawa pa siyang alipin noon pero dama niya namang sobrang alaga nito sa kanya.

My father told me the same thing. He said, he only wanted to marry my mom to end both of their miseries, but then he couldn’t stop feeling sick to his stomach when my mother gave him an ultimatum. Nang sabihin daw ni mommy na gagawin din niya ang lahat ng ginagawa niya sa mga babaeng ka-fling ay doon na umikot ang mundo niya. That was when he realized he should stop playing with fire. That he should fix himself and focus on the convenience he created for them both. Nang gawin niya ay mabilis na niyang naramdaman kung gaano kaimportante sa kanya si mommy. That he was in denial for a long time and he actually loved her so much.

I don’t want to be like that. I don’t want to be in-denal and missed something important. All I wanted was to be honest and I didn’t expect myself to do it when Imara turned to me again.

“This is so beautiful Euxerre! I haven’t seen such an amazing view like this!”

“You are more beautiful than this, Imara…” lutang kong sambit, nanghihina niyang naibaba ang hawak na telepono at lutang ring dahan-dahang napalapit sa akin.

My feet automatically closed the space between us, halos mabitiwan ko ang aking telepono mahawakan lang ng mas maayos ang kanyang kamay.

“You are so damn beautiful I’m so lucky to have this moment with you… gusto ko pa ng maraming ganito kasama ka. I’m sorry if I’m being too fast, but I don’t think I can go on another day without asking you this…”

Nahabol niya ang paghinga nang wala sa sariling umangat ang aking isang kamay patungo sa kanyang mukha. My heart was beating so fast too, but I dismissed it. Nahipnotismo na akong muli lalo na nang kusang bumaba ang aking mga mata patungo sa kanyang mga labi.

“Can I kiss you? Please, I want to kiss you, Imara…”

CHAPTER 7

Chapter Seven

Something Out Of This World

She figure out I hate begging so she let me do my request. Ipinikit niya pa lang ang mga mata niya ay parang sasabog na ang puso ko sa matinding antisipasyon.

I lowered my face to kiss her, slowly at first. I knew I was not a bad kisser pero nangapa ako nang tuluyan nang maglapat ang aming mga labi. I was lost for a moment. Indeed I feel like a teenager having his first kiss for the very first time. Wala sa sariling nabitiwan ko na ang aking iPhone para lang maayos na ilingkis ang kamay sa kanyang bewang. I didn’t bother picking it up. I had to grip on her waist tightly dahil para akong matutumba sa lakas ng kalampag ng puso ko.

My eyes remained closed as I started tasting and savoring her lips. She gasped and put her hands to my shoulders, gaya ko ay nanghihina rin sa aking kapangahasan. Naghinang ang mga labi namin ng ilang segundo. I let our breathings do the talking for us. Mahigpit ang kapit namin sa isa’t isa, parehas nagpipigil na palalimin ang halik. I had to pull an inches away so my lips could praise her again.

“God, Imara… I didn’t know I’d crave for this… You’re making me crave for you and I want more than just a peck.”

“Then kiss me more, Euxerre… I’m not stopping you—”

I did. This time, I was more aggressive, determinado. Pero kahit na sinisiil ko nang muli ng halik ang kanyang mga labi at gustong-gusto pang bilisan iyon ay hindi ko magawa. There was something in me that kept on telling me to do it gently. Banayad at may buong pusong pag-iingat. Sa pagkawala ng ungol sa kanyang mga labi ay natauhan ako’t mas binagalan lang ang paggalaw.

My insistent mouth began kissing her with so passion, sending wild tremors along my nerves. Bawat galaw ay sigurado, making me hungry for a sensation I never thought I was capable of feeling. And when Imara started kissing me back with the same eagerness, I totally lost it. Her bubblegum tongue began dancing salsa against mine. Naidiin ko na siya sa barandilya, nanggigil pero pigil ang bawat galaw.

Ilang minuto ang lumipas ay hindi ko na rin napigilan ang pagkawala ng ungol sa aking mga labi, making her gasp and lose her strength. Mabuti na lang at mahigpit ang kapit ko sa kanya dahil kung hindi ay parehas kaming nalaglag sa sahig. We were both laughing when the kiss finally broke.

Hindi ko na inalis ang pagkakayakap sa kanyang katawan matapos naming balikan ang panunuod sa araw na nakatutok na sa aming dalawa’t naging saksi sa aming unang halik na pinagsaluhan.

I helped her settled in the villa after we finally finished our breakfast. Ilang minuto ang nakalipas ay muli kaming nagkita para sa paglilibot ko sa kanya sa buong lugar. She changed her clothes. Ngayon ay nakasuot na siya ng pink na beach dress. I don’t know why, but pink really suits her. Lumalabas lalo ang ganda ng kanyang balat sa kulay.

Her glow was beaming. Hindi matapos-tapos ang pagsamba ko sa kanyang kabuuan. I was jealous of her dark long hair with big natural curles because it was hugging her curves. I wish I could do that 27/4.

“You really like pink, huh?”

She chuckled and nodded at me. “You figured. How about you? What’s your favorite color?”

Nagkibit ako ng balikat pero nang mapabaling sa kanya ay nagkaro’n din kaagad ng sagot. “I think pink’s my favorite now, too.”

“Stop, hindi nga?”

“I’m serious. I don’t fancy any color but I like seeing pink now.”

She blushed at that. “I don’t know why you’ve been single all these years. Magaling kang mambola. Your lines are always solid.”

“Hindi naman ako nambobola. And I told you, I’m a bad liar so expect me to be honest all the time.”

Hindi na niya nagawang kontrahin ang mga sinabi ko. Imbes na magpahinga at hapon na lang pumunta sa beach ay doon niya hiniling na magpalipas buong araw. She said we only have the day to enjoy the place and we’re going back again tomorrow so she wanted to make the most of our trip. Wala naman sa akin ’yon. I actually miss being on the beach so it was not hard for me to grant her requests.

We spent time island hopping, mingling with other people, and just enjoying the day being normal, free, and happy.

“Thank you so much for doing this, Eux. You don’t have any idea how much I needed this.” untag niya matapos naming makapagbihis at ngayon ay naglalakad na lang sa dalampasigan habang naghihintay ng sunset sa Las Cabanas.

“My pleasure. I didn’t think I needed this too until now so thank you.”

She smiled and let the salty air brush against her face. Wala sa sariling napangiti na lang din ako. Her face was a bit red because we were exposed from the sun the whole day, but it suits her more. Balewala sa kanya ang tan na nakuha sa araw. Kung wala nga lang daw trabaho ay gusto niya pang mag-extend. I offered her again the villa and the private jet. Muli kong inulit na kahit anong oras niya gustong pumunta ay pwede. Muli siyang nagpasalamat.

As we lay on the beach, the silence took over us. Tahimik kaming dalawa. Walang ginawa kung hindi ang pakinggan ang banayad na alon sa dagat at lasapin ang sariwang simoy ng hangin.

It was nice taking a break sometimes. Sa buong araw ay wala akong naramdaman kung hindi kasiyahan. As if I forgot to have fun for such a long time at ngayon na lang ulit. Pakiramdam ko ay nakawala ako sa matagal na panahong pagkakakulong. With that, I promised myself this wouldn’t be the last. Gustohin ko mang kasama si Imara palagi lalo na sa mga ganito, ipinangako ko na sa sarili kong kahit wala siya ay gagawin ko rin ito ng madalas. That fun should always be on my schedule.

“It feels like the movies…” namamangha niyang sambit habang ngayon ay nakatitig sa kulay rosas na langit at pinapanuod ang araw na kasalukuyan nang bumababa.

“It is.” I answered as I glance at her. Umahon na rin ako’t naupo sa kanyang tabi.

“I sometimes wonder how some people was given such beauty yet they just take it for granted. ’Yung mga nasa siyudad gusto rito, samatalang tayo, gusto naman dito. People really don’t know how to be contented, I guess. Or maybe, nagsasawa rin sa mga kinalakihang environment. Maybe humans were created with hunger to always look for something new. Something that will excite us. Something out of this world…”

Wala akong naisagot. My head was blown away with how deep her words are.

“Kapag nasa Manila ka, parang walang ibang importante doon kung hindi trabaho. Mabilis ang oras. Everything feels heavy and polluted samantalang dito, parang napakabagal ng oras. You get to fully enjoy every minute of the day. It gives us new perspective, freshen our mindset, and freed our minds and soul. It makes me so thankful I was granted the gift of life. I appreciate everything more being here…” she paused, sadness slowly crept on her lips. Sumagot na ako.

“That’s deep.”

“You didn’t think about it?” she asked, ngayon ay nakabaling na rin sa akin.

“Being with you now makes me so thankful of my life, too… and everything in it.” I answered, dahan-dahang inilalapit ang kamay sa kanya.

She smiled when she felt my hand touching hers. Hinayaan niyang maingat kong ipagsalikop ang mga kamay namin. She then leaned on me and brought her attention back to the sunset.

“I think I take all things for granted. These past few years I feel like I was on the loop. Lahat ng ginawa kong cycle paulit-ulit lang dahil sa trabaho. Parang walang progress sa buhay. Everything felt dull. Even before going here, I think I was on that same loop, but now I was freed from it because of you. And no, I am not saying this because I want to please you whatsoever. Sinasabi ko dahil sa pagkakataong ito ay ’yon ang nararamdaman ko. You gave me new perspective that made me don’t want to be imprisoned of that cycle anymore. I want something new, too. Something that will excite me. Something out of this world… at kung bibigyan ng pagkakataon, I want this new chapter with you, Imara.”

Napabalik ang mga mata niya sa akin. Our eyes locked, but it bothers me to see mixed emotions from her eyes. Tila ba napakarami niyang gustong sabihin na hindi niya magawa. Sa huli, kahit na hindi kasiyahan ang nababanaag ko sa kanyang mga mata ay iyon ang ipinadama’t ipinakita niya sa akin.

“I want to be in this new chapter, too, Euxerre… Can I be honest with you?”

“Shoot. Masyado ba akong mabilis? Ayaw mo ba ng ganito? Is it weirding you out?”

She gently shook her head. Humigpit ang kapit niya sa aking kamay ngunit nakahinga ako ng maluwag sa kanyang masuyong pagngiti.

“I never felt anything like this to anyone. Masyado kang mabilis at ilang araw pa lang tayong lumalabas, but I feel like we’re meant to meet just to feel every extraordinary feelings and emotions there is. It’s weird how each second we got to progress towards what our parents wanted for us, but I’m looking forward to whatever this connection will brought us. I couldn’t explain it—”

“I understand and you don’t have to because I honestly feel the same. Hindi ako kailanman naging ganito kabilis sa kahit na sino. I maybe all in when it comes to being in a relationship, but this is nothing compared to what I felt before with anyone. It’s a good kind of weird feeling. Nakakakaba.”

She smiled and nodded. “Nakakakaba, that’s the word.”

“But I want to dig more. Gusto kong ma-discover kung ano pang pwedeng maramdaman kasama ka at sana gano’n ka rin… I hope this connection wouldn’t change unless for the better.”

“I want that, too… I needed that.”

Wala sa sariling nabitiwan ko na ang kanyang kamay upang akbayan ang kanyang katawan. I pulled her to my body and gently gave a peck on her forehead. She liked it.

Wala na kaming naging usapan. We just sit there with pure silence until the sun finally left the sky. We had dinner after the sunset. Walang segundong hindi ko nakita ang kanyang mga ngiti. Dama ko rin ang matindi niyang pasasalamat na para bang matagal na niyang kailangan ng ganitong break. As I was watching her, I felt the need of it, too. She have no idea how she made me so damn happy.

Hindi ko pa man alam kung saan kami dadalhin ng koneksiyong ’to ay dama at alam ko na sa sariling handa ako. And I can’t wait to succeed to it, too.

CHAPTER 8

Chapter Eight

Red Flag

My connection with Imara didn’t stop. Walang araw na hindi kami magkausap. We hang out a whole straight week after our trip to El Nido. Talagang ang progress ng relasyon namin ay tuloy-tuloy. I sometimes force myself to stop and not be excited about it because I was afraid I’m being too fast and could get hurt, but I couldn’t help it.

“Tell me na kasi kuya. What’s the real score? What happened after the date?”

Pinigilan kong mapangisi sa nangungulit na tanong ni Somerset. If only she knew what happened after that baka sumabog na rin ang utak niya sa mga nagawa namin ni Imara. Though I was still slow when it comes to physical touch, this time I knew it would be best. I don’t want to spoil anything yet.

“Just go, Soms. I’m kind of busy right now.”

“No, you’re not! You’re just being madamot! Since when did you become like that? You remember? I am someone you can trust with your love life.”

“The only thing you need to know is that I’m happy.”

“With Imara?”

Nagkibit ako ng balikat. Mas lalo siyang na-frustate. Hindi ko na napigilan ang pagtayo upang pantayan siya.

“Come on. I just want to keep this one private first until we’re both sure of each other. Baka ma-jinx, eh.”

She heave a sigh. “Fine. Kung sabagay mahirap ngang mausog. Anyway, kapag super happy ka na at need mong mag-vent, just know that I’m here alright? ako ang una mong sabihan.”

“Got it.”

“Imara is really pretty isn’t she?”

Lutang akong nangiti. “Beautiful.”

“Gotcha! Oh God my brother is finally in love again!”

Agad nag-init ang mukha ko nang madulas sa mga salita. I shove her out of my room. Tatawa-tawa lang ito at buong araw na naman akong tinukso. Hinayaan ko na lang at naghanda na lang ako para sa dinner namin ni Imara.

Gaya noong pangalawa naming pagkikita, todo pa rin ang pag-aayos ko. Good thing my parents didn’t suspect a thing. Tikom din ang bibig ni Vlasta at ngingisi-ngisi lang sa akin.

“What do you think about her?”

“For starter, she’s really beautiful and you look perfect together.” he answered, lumawak ang ngisi ko.

Vlasta has been with me since I was a teenager. I remember may ibang mga nagbantay sa akin noon iba rin sa mga bantay ng kapatid ko pero si Vlasta lang talaga ang pinakanakasundo ko sa lahat. Bukod kasi sa ilang taon lang ang agwat namin, he really became my wingman and buddy. Siguro kung parehas kami ng estado sa buhay ay baka maging best friend ko siya. It was weird to have that kind of relationship to your employee so when I began working, I appointed him as my right hand. Gaya ko, he struggle with having relationships, too. Ang unang rule kasi ni dad sa trabaho ay mag-focus lang at wala dapat makaka-relasyon habang binabantayan ako pero sa aming dalawa ni Vlasta ay malaya siyang gawin ang lahat ng gusto niya. Iyon nga lang, maalat din.

“And?”

“And I don’t see you this happy again. Parang dekada na ang nakalipas simula nakita kitang ganito ka-excited na parang first time magka-girlfriend.”

“Sad I wasn’t her boyfriend yet.”

“Papunta na rin naman ’yon doon. Look at you now. You’ve been on a date for how many times? I already lost count boss.”

“I told you to drop that.”

“Sorry. Technically you’re still my boss so.”

“It’s weird especially when we’re talking about my personal life. I need a buddy when it comes to it.”

“Fine. Anyway, I’m happy for you. I like Imara and I know you like her, too.”

“Do you think it’s too early to ask her to be my girlfriend?”

“Why don’t you ask her tonight? Siya lang ang makakasagot n’yan.”

Wala sa sariling napabuntong-hininga ako. It has only been three weeks since we met yet my mind could already access our future and build an amazing life with her.

I loosened my tie. Habang palapit sa venue ng dinner namin ay para akong sinasakal. My suit were as usual expensive, I smell success, the flowers I have in my hand were special, and the diamond bracelet I had in my pocket was worth millions. Kung singsing lang ang dala ko ay baka aakalaing mag-po-propose na ako ng kasal. Kung sabagay, we can already skip all that and our families won’t mind. Baka magdiwang pa ang mga iyon kapag bigla kaming ikasal.

“Thank you. Nag-abala ka pa.” masayang bati ni Imara matapos akong salubungin at kunin ang aking hawak na bulaklak.

“Of course. You’re too precious to not be spoiled with gifts even though I know you’re already used to this.”

Naging hilaw ang mga ngiti niya. Hahalikan ko na sana siya sa pisngi pero agad siyang umiwas.

“Shall we? I’m sorry medyo gutom na ako. I’ve been working the whole day.” Agad niyang sabi matapos umatras palayo sa akin.

I wasn’t expecting that since we couldn’t stop kissing each other the last time we were together, but I just shrugged it off.

Siguro nga ay pagod lang siya sa trabaho dahil buong durasyon ng pagkain ay tahimik ito. The vibe was so off, I was afraid to give her my gift but then it was the only thing that I think could lighten up the mood so I finally took it out of my pocket.

“What’s that?”

“I swear this is not an engagement ring so you can relax.” I joked.

Pilit siyang nangiti at kinuha na ang kahon. I was expecting her to at least be giddy and excited, but it really seems like she was really used to it. Nawala ang ngiti ko gayunpaman ay nagawa ko pa ring maging gentleman at itago ang lahat ng pagiging awkward sa gabi naming dalawa.

“Do you like it? I can have it altered and customized—”

“No it’s okay.”

“Can I put it on you?”

“No, I’m fine. I don’t fancy wearing any bracelet tonight, but thank you for this Soronious. I appreciate it.”

I pursed my lips and nodded at her. “You’re welcome.”

I thought I could still save the conversation. I talked about our last trip and the dates we’ve been on, but it bores her. Tila ba pagod na pagod itong makinig kaya hindi na ako nagpumilit pa.

“Do you want to go somewhere after this? the night is still young…” I trailed off still hoping to save the night, but my lips immediately closed when I saw her dry reaction. She then shook her head and forced herself to yawn.

Ibang-iba siya ngayon. Inintindi ko na lang. Being a woman is already a struggle. She maybe on her period or something so I didn’t try to be more annoying. Sabi nga ni Soms, kapag bad trip ang babae at saktong may dalaw ay ikaw na lang ang lumayo kung ayaw mong makain ng buo. I did that. She maybe on her period.

“I’m sorry to end our dinner this early, but I’m really tired. Gusto na nga sana kitang tawagan kanina na i-cancel na lang pero pumunta pa rin ako. I appreciate your gifts, but you don’t have to, really.”

“It’s okay. I had to do it. It was you who I remember when I saw that bracelet so I bought it.”

“Thank you. I’m sorry, but I have to go home now. Parang babagsak ang katawan ko.”

“Are you alright?”

Muntik na siyang matumba nang akmang ilalapat ko ang kamay sa kanyang noo pero mabilis siyang umiwas na parang ako ang may sakit.

“I’m fine! Sige na. Thanks again!” she said and then walked away from me as fast as she could.

Naiwan akong tulala, gulat sa lahat ng nangyari, at nag-iisip kung bakit naging ganito?

Did I do something wrong? May nalaman ba siya sa akin sa mga maling nagawa ko sa nakaraan? But I am behaved all these years. My past was outstanding. Kahit ang mga ex-girlfriend or naging fling ko noon ay maayos ang mga relasyon namin. There was no bad blood. I know she wouldn’t find something off because I am not that kind of man.

What if ’yon ang ayaw niya? What if she realize she likes men who loves trouble? Who has many red flags?

I know it was weird and wrong for anyone to aim for that, but I knew I lot of women who loves chasing men with red flags. Iyong mga babaeng gusto ng lalaking babaguhin kahit na ang totoo, walang lalaking magbabago kahit gaano pa kahaba at ka-dakila ang pagmamahal mo.

Men change when they want to and not just because of someone. Parte iyon ng pagbabago pero hindi iyon ang kabuuan. You can never force someone to change his ways just because of the love you are willing to give.

Most men were broken, but their ego was too big to tell the world about it. And most of us, marami akong kilala ay hindi kailangan ng babae para gumaling sila. They need to accept, love, and forgive themselves first before they can extend that love to others.

It was risky to love a broken and toxic man. It was as if literally, you’re playing with fire. Kapag hindi mo naapula ng maaga, pati ikaw madadamay. And two broken people in a relationship will never work.

Buong gabi akong hindi pinatulog ng pag-iisip. Nagsimulang mag-rewind ang utak ko para lang isipin ang maling nagawa pero wala naman akong maalala.

I was about to close my eyes when my phone beeped for a text. Parang may naghabulang daga sa puso ko nang makita ang pangalan ng babaeng buong gabing laman ng aking utak.

Imara:

I’m so sorry I went home early. Masama lang talaga ang pakiramdam ko.

I replied right away.

Ako:

It’s okay. I understand. Are you okay now?

Imara:

Yes. Nakaidlip na ako. How are you?

Ako:

I’m good. I’m thinking about you.

Imara:

What about me? I’m sorry talaga kung may nagawa man ako ngayon.

Ako:

No, please. I get it pagod ka lang. Naiintindihan ko. Sana hindi ka na lang talaga tumuloy kung masama pala ang pakiramdam mo. Next time tell me, alright? Mas importante ’yon kaysa sa akin.

Imara:

Sorry ulit. Babawi na lang ako sa ’yo next time.

That finally put a smile on my face.

Ako:

Are you sure you still want a next time?

Imara:

Are you kidding me?! Of course!

Ako:

I was worried I did something wrong that turned you off tonight. I’m sorry kung meron man.

Imara:

No please. You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me. Don’t blame yourself.

Ako:

Are you sure?

Imara:

Positive.

Nakahinga na akong ng maluwag. Tuluyan nang napawi ang mga negatibong nararamdaman ko nang sa wakas ay marinig ko na ang kanyang boses. It was lively now. Ibang-iba na sa tono kanina. Halatang nakapagpahinga na at maayos na ang pakiramdam.

“Did you like my gift?”

“What gift?”

“The bracelet? Kasya ba? Tell me honestly, nagustohan mo ba?”

“Oh shoot! yeah, of course! It’s beautiful! It’s perfect.”

“Well that’s a relief. I’m glad you liked it.”

“Thank you so much, Eux. Sa lahat-lahat. I really appreciate you putting efforts in everything.”

“You’re welcome, Imara. But please don’t scare me again like that. Kapag masama ang pakiramdam mo o wala ka sa mood sabihin mo lang. I hate overthinking. Akala ko may nagawa akong mali kaya wala kang gana.”

She apologized again. Nabawi ng usapan namin ang mga nangyari sa aming pagkikita. I was glad we had a talk and cleared everything out.

“You say you have three sisters, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Uhm, alam na ba nila ang tungkol sa atin? How about your parents? Did you tell them?”“

“No. As much as I want the whole world to know about us and how you make me happy, I won’t until you’re comfortable with it.”

Natawa ako nang mapabuntong-hininga siya.

“Are you really worried about that?”

“No naman. Ikaw ba? Aren’t you worried someone might caught us?”

“And spread what? That we’re perfect for each other?”

She giggled. “Hindi nga? Hindi mo ba naiisip ’yon?”

“You want me to be honest?”

“Uh-hmm.”

“I almost asked you to be my girlfriend tonight. This past few week feels like the longest time I’ve been alive. The thought of you keeps me excited. Your voice always makes me weak, and your smile? damn, I missed that today, but that’s honestly the only sight that comforts me… Gustong-gusto kita and I always look forward meeting you. Seeing and enjoying your presence. Sabihin na nating baliw na ako sa ’yo so there’s that.”

“Whew! That’s a load of honestly, Eux.”

“You’re about to have an honest man so be used to it.”

She paused. Matagal siyang hindi kumibo kaya ako ulit ang nagsalita.

“Hey… you don’t have to force yourself if you’re not ready yet. Gusto ko lang maging honest sa ’yo para malinaw at malaman mo kung anong gusto ko para sa atin. I really want you to be my girlfriend, Imara… I am mesmerized by you and I don’t think I want to look in other places for love because with you… I feel like I already found it. I really want this to work, us. Maghihintay ako kung kailan ka handa. Hindi kita mamadaliin—”

“What if I say yes now? Paano kung ngayon pa lang pumayag na akong maging girlfriend mo?”

Dama ko ang pag-ha-hang ng utak ko sa narinig. Parang nag-lock din ang panga ko sa kanyang sinabi.

“W-what?”

“I think all I want right now is an honest man so… can I be your girlfriend now, Euxerre?”

“D-damn, y-yes… oh fuck! Yes!”

Full version of this story will only be posted on Patreon and VIP group. Click the link on my bio to read this book or message me for details.

Gcash payment is accepted!

Thank you! 

✨

# CHAPTER 9

Chapter Nine

Love Language

After so many years of being single, I finally have a girlfriend. 

I couldn't believe 
that
 finally happened. Hanggang paggising ay hindi nawala ang ngiti ko't kasiyahan sa puso habang inaalala ang matamis na ngiti ni Imara pagkatapos niya akong sagutin. We took a video call after that and I was damned we only see each other through screen. Gayunpaman, ngayong alam kong opisyal na kaming magkarelasyon ay marami pang bagay na dapat kong paghandaan.

I still kept my mouth shut about it. Sa lahat ay si Vlasta lang ang sinabihan ko dahil imposible rin namang hindi niya malaman gayong bente kuwatro oras ko siyang kasama. I trust him with it, too, and I also needed someone to vent out the flooding happiness in my heart. And when he heard it, he was more than happy for me. 

Kasama ko siyang namili ng mga bagong regalo para kay Imara. Ewan ko ba. Kahit na alam kong hindi niya naman kailangan ng mga regalo at sanay na siya sa gano'n ay hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili ko. It was one of my love language. Mabuti na lang at nang magkita kaming muli ay hindi na gaya noong gabing nag-dinner kami. This time, she was glowing again. Abot langit ang ngiti. 

Nang ibigay ko na ang mga regalo ay kitang-kita ko kaagad ang malaking pasasalamat niya kahit na ilang beses na niyang sinabing huwag na akong mag-abala.

I took her to Coron the next day. Gusto ko lang buong araw siyang makasama. I know ocean calms her and she was happy by it. Mas nagustohan niya pa ang pagkakataong makasama ako sa napakagandang lugar kaysa sa milyon-milyong halaga ng mga regalo ko.

I sometimes love the idea how she was spoiled by her parents. Kung gaano rin sila kayamanan dahil alam kong hindi iyon ang habol niya sa akin. I've met a lot of women who has one thing in common when it comes to knowing me. And that was only my money. 

I remember my father talking about wealth also being a curse. Iyon din kasi ang dahilan noon kung bakit sila nagtagpo at nagkaroon ng mas malalim na koneksiyon ni mommy.

"Even if you have loads of security, you still need to be careful and evaluate what people may take away from you. You need to be wise on choosing who you hang out with and who you give your attention to, because most people only likes people whom they know they can use. Bukod sa maraming manggagamit sa paligid na dapat mong iwasan, you also have to be careful with those people who are jealous of you dahil kahit na mukhang masaya ang mga iyan para sa 'yo, mas parte pa rin sa kanilang mas sasaya kapag bumagsak ka. You always need to use this." he said while tapping the side of his forehead, pertaining to his brain.

Growing up, those words lingers on my head like a broken record. It was my reminder. Nagpapasalamat akong ibinigay ni daddy sa akin ang mga paalalang 'yon dahil talagang nagamit ko rin at wala namang nakagamit sa akin at sa kapangyarihang saklaw ng pagiging isang Rozovsky ko.

"Does my gifts overwhelm you? Ayaw mo ba?"

"Why do you think of that?"

Humigpit ang kapit ko sa kamay ni Imara. I hugged her body tighter. Nasa iisang hammock kami habang pinanunuod ang dagat sa hindi kalayuan. Maliwanag ang buwan at masarap ang sariwang simoy ng hangin. We only have two hours before our flight back to Manila. Gustohin man naming manatili sa lugar ay hindi pwede dahil parehas kaming may trabaho pa bukas.

"I don't know. Baka lang iniisip mong ni-la-love bomb kita para mas mahulog ka sa 'kin. That's not my intention at all. It's just that I love giving gifts especially when I'm happy."

"So ibig sabihin masayang-masaya ka dahil ilang designer bags at cartier watches ang binili mo para sa 'kin?"

"I want you to have an option tsaka para hindi ka rin magsawa. I don't know. Seeing those things reminded me of you. Naisip ko lang na baka magustohan mo so I bought it. We can take it back to the store if you want to exchange it to some design you want."

"Those birkin bags were limited edition and only special people can get it so no. Isa pa, ikaw ang pumili no'n, 'di ba?"

I nodded as a response.

"Then I'm keeping it. You actually have a good taste when it comes to giving gifts. Mukhang praktisado kang mamigay ng regalo?" she teased. Natawa ako ng bahagya.

"Yes, but not because of what you're thinking. I have three sisters and I always accompany them when they are shopping especially Somerset. Sa lahat ay siya iyong mahilig sa mga designer clothes so I learned a lot from her."

"That's cool. She seems nice."

"They all are. And I think they will like you."

"You sure about that?"

Bahagya akong lumayo upang magsalubong ang aming mga paningin. Kusang umarko ang aking mga labi sa isang napakatamis na ngiti.

"Of course, baby... I mean, what's not to like? You're stunning and perfect."

"Stop. You're making me blush. Parang ni-la-love bomb mo na yata talaga ako."

Natawa ako doon. Iginalaw ko ang aking kamay patungo sa kanyang leeg. Her eyes began to flick slowly while locking eyes with me.

"I just... like you so much... Masyado pa sigurong mabilis para maramdaman 'yong love, but I think it's what I already feel for you. Wala naman sigurong time frame kapag nagmamahal?"

She held my hand and shook her head. Muntik na akong mapamura nang basain niya ang kanyang mga labi, making it more red and tempting.

"I guess so... It's really weird feeling like this every time I am with you, but your presence gives me comfort. Parang katahimikan sa magulong mundo. And I'm yearning for it. Parang hindi ko na rin kayang bitiwan..."

"Then can we now say we're in love and let the odds be in our favor?"

She giggled. Sa kasiyahan ay hindi na napigilang halikan ako. I responded to her kiss wholeheartedly. Sa loob ng dalawang oras na natitira ay wala kaming ginawa kung hindi ang pupugin ng halik at yakapin ang isa't isa, pero kahit na isang buong araw na kaming magkasama ay parehas pa rin kaming hindi kuntento sa aming paghihiwalay. Para bang kalahati ang nawawala sa kabuuan ko kapag wala na siya.

We decided to keep our relationship private for now. Gusto naming bigyan ng oras muna ang isa't isang maging handa bago ianunsiyo iyon sa aming mga pamilya. I won't mind telling it to everyone pero siya at ang mga desisyon niya ang importante. Sabi ko nga, kung saan lang siya komportable ay doon ako.

My mindset changed so much since I had a better connection with my now girlfriend, Imara. Kung noon ay pakiramdam ko nahuhuli ako sa karera ng buhay, ngayong masaya ako sa piling niya ay naiisip kong tama lang ang lahat ng mga nangyari. If I focus and succumb to the pressure of having a partner, hindi ko na siya makikilala. I wouldn't feel this happy and loved by the woman I value and adore so much. It was really a great timing. 

Wala man tayong timeline sa progress natin sa buhay, naniniwala akong may tamang oras pa rin para sa lahat ng bagay. And I'm glad I waited for the right moment. 

Our relationship was something I was so proud of. Hindi gaya ng mga nakaraang relasyon ko, with her, everything was just chill. Walang pressure. Malayo sa hindi pagkakaintindihan, and our interest were the same. Kung may pagkakaiba man sa mga gusto namin at hilig, we were both willing to explore it together. She never played golf but she loved it the first time we dated at the golf club. I've never been in a theme park and I always hated the thought of roller coasters, but hearing her laugh because I was being scared was the loveliest thing I was lucky to get to experience.

Walang tigil ang aming pag-di-date. Walang araw na hindi kami magkausap. I sometimes couldn't breathe without seeing her everyday kaya kahit na busy siya, nagagawa niya pa ring bigyan ako ng oras whether it be personal or sa video call kapag sobrang busy niya. That was our routine. I settled for that kahit na kaliwa't kanan na naman ang tanong ng mga magulang ko kung may nililigawan na raw ba ako.

"You're at the right age, Nio. Hindi naman sa pinipilit kita, but I want you to know that you should prioritize your love life, too. Me and your father appreciate what you are doing for the company, but you should also think about your future. Kung sino ang gusto mong makasama habang buhay. You see, we are not here forever. Gano'n din ang mga kapatid mo. Eventually, you'll need someone to be there for you, to fight with you. Your own person through thick and thin."

"I got it mom. You don't have to remind me again."

She heave a sigh as she sat beside me. Hinawakan niya pa ang kamay ko. 

"I'm worried, Soronious."

"Please mom, don't be. I'm fine and I'll get there I promise you."

"Ayaw kong tumanda kang mag-isa."

I laughed a little just to cut the drama. "I said I got it mom. Hindi mangyayari 'yan."

"Oh... so you mean, you are into dating again?"

Kahit na napakarami kong gustong sabihin sa kanya lalo na tungkol sa estado ng puso ko at kung gaano ako kaswerte at kasaya sa girlfriend ko ay pinigilan ko pa rin ang sarili. This is something Imara and I should talk first. Hindi ako dapat madulas.

Ilang minuto pa kaming nag-usap. She poured all her sentiments and fear for me ending up alone, but I assured her that it will never going to happen.

I told Imara all that when we got to talk before bed. 

"I couldn't imagine the shock from their faces once they knew I already have a girlfriend and it's you. Baka magtatatalon sa tuwa si mommy kapag nalaman ang lahat ng tungkol sa ating dalawa."

"Are you ready for that?" she asked, her voice were a bit sleepy and it was so damn sexy to my ears. Parang may kumikiliti sa tainga ko.

"Uh-hmm. At this point, I think it's a dream. You know I never want to do 
us
 in secret. Alam ko sa sarili ko ngayong handa akong ipakilala't ipagmalaki ka sa lahat. It's what everyone wants for me and I know same goes to you, right?"

"'Yan din ang topic kanina, but I don't know. I'm scared, Eux..."

"Why, baby? Anong ikinatatakot mo?"

She did a long pause. Pakiramdam ko ay sumisikip ang dibdib ko sa ilang segundong hindi siya nagsasalita.

"Hey..."

"I love you, Euxerre... and I'm scared because I know I'm falling too fast."

Ako naman ang sandaling natahimik dahil sa narinig.

"Y-you... love me?"

"I know it's such a big deal and I should take time contemplating to it, but everything feels like falling into places... I know I already fall in love with you but—"

"I love you, too, Imara..." I cut her off, lutang sa pakiramdam na dulot ng kanyang mga salita. "You're with me. Ako ang boyfriend mo at ngayon pa lang ipinapangako ko nang wala kang dapat katakutan dahil mahal din kita. I can protect you to whoever you're scared of, you know that."

Nanatiling tahimik ang kanyang linya. Napaahon ako sa pagkakahiga ng wala sa oras.

"Baby... Don't you trust me? Tingin mo ba hindi ko kayang gawin 'yon? That I'm just doing this for convenience or whatsoever?"

"No, it's not that. I know you're true to your words and I feel that everything between us is genuine but—"

"I love you, Imara," I repeated, mas madiin at malinaw. "Wala kang dapat ikatakot sa pagmamahal ko and I promise you that."

"I know, Eux... I know..." she heave a sigh, hinayaan kong magsalita siya ulit.

"When will you think we're ready to tell them about us?"

"I am ready. I'm just waiting for you."

"You think next week is fine for a proper dinner with all of our family?"

"But you said you're not ready yet."

"I am with you and you're right that I should trust you."

"Are you sure?"

"Will it make you happy?"

"The whole Rozovsky clan will definitely rejoice, my love."

That put a smile on her face. Napangiti ako't nakahinga na nang maluwag sa kanyang pagtango.

"Then let's do it. Handa na rin akong sabihin sa kanila ang totoong estado nating dalawa. I want to let them know how much you mean to me and how this love could grow and do more."

I was flooded with happiness. All I could do was raise my eyebrows to ask her again if she was sure of it.

"I'm ready, baby... as long as I'm with you, I know I'll always be fine. Let's make it official."

# CHAPTER 10

Chapter Ten

Best Day Of Our Life

"Do I look fine?" matindi ang pag-aalalang tanong ni Imara sa akin habang hawak ang aking braso at patungo kami sa Fire Palace upang tuluyan na siyang makilala ng pamilya ko.

My mother was excited when I told her I have a girlfriend. Walang araw na hindi niya ako kinulit. Ilang beses niya ring sinabi na ipakilala ko na ito sa amin at ngayong gabi, alam kong mas masosorpresa pa siya kapag nakita niyang si Imara ito. 

Dad was also excited. Kitang-kita ko sa kanyang sobrang proud siya at parang nabunutan na rin ng malaking tinik dahil sa aking inanunsiyo. As if they have been waiting for this moment to happen.

"You're perfect, love. Stop overthinking."

"You love me so that's technically a biased opinion."

Natawa ako't agad ding umiling. "I'm an honest man and you know what that already means."

"Fine. But are you sure? How about your sisters? Tingin mo magugustohan nila ako para sa 'yo?"

"Hundred percent sure."

Muli siyang napabuntong-hininga. I tightened the grip on her hand. "You need to relax. Everything is going to be fine, love."

Sa aking mga salita ay tuluyan na rin siyang kumalma. Just like what I imagined, halos magtumalon si mommy sa tuwa at kabiglaan nang tuluyan na kaming makarating sa restaurant. Somerset's face were just as surprised as mom. Lahat ay magiliw na binati ang girlfriend ko at gano'n din ito sa aking pamilya. 

Nang tuluyan na kaming naupo ay ramdam ko nang mas kalmado si Imara. Everyone was already throwing their praises at her. My sisters teased me and told her that I am the luckiest man alive for having her. Walang pagsidlan ang malawak at matamis na ngiti ni Imara. She was as happy as my family was.

"We're thinking about having a formal dinner with my family, Mr. and Mrs. Rozovsky."

"Oh stop, hija. Please drop the formality and just call us tito or tita. If you want, you can also call us how you call your parents because I think that's where we're heading!"

"Mom."

Imara continued blushing. 

"What? Don't tell me patatagalin n'yo pa ito? You're clearly perfect for each other and it has been ages since a Rozovsky got married, right baby?"

My father nodded at mom. Nagniningning din talaga ang mga mata sa sobrang kasiyahan. I mouthed '
I'm sorry' 
to my girlfriend, but she was entertained with the topic. Sinegundahan naman ng mga kapatid ko ang usapan. 

"Darating din naman talaga tayo d'yan, pero ayaw ko namang i-pressure at i-corner ang girlfriend ko. I want to give her time to think because marriage is a lifetime job. Hindi dapat magpadalos-dalos. I don't want to make mistake and I don't want to hurt, Imara."

Nangilid ang mga luha niya sa aking sinabi. I'm glad my family got my point. They all respected my answer. Somerset changed the subject. Nagtanong na lang ito sa pinagkakaabalahan ni Imara. Habang nag-uusap silang mga babae ay nag-usap naman kami ni dad.

"What do you think about her, dad?"

"I always respect and trust your decisions when it comes to this, Eux, but I'm impressed. I already like Imara for you long before you two have met. The Hoffmans have a long history with our family and it's just time we sealed that connection through both of you. I'm proud of you son."

"I appreciate it dad. Thank you."

I looked back at my girlfriend. Abalang-abala silang mag-usap sa hindi ko na nasundan na topic. She was clearly enjoying my mother and sister's company and seeing that moment solidified the thought that I just made the right choice. That she is clearly the woman I love to be part of our family—my life. Wala na yata akong gusto pa sa buhay kung hindi ang sundin ang mga kagustuhan ni mommy. Hindi dahil sa utos niya kung hindi dahil iyon na rin ang gusto ng puso ko ngayon. 

Natapos ang dinner na naging maayos at masaya lang ang lahat. We couldn't let go of each other while we were on our way to her place. Gustohin ko mang sumama pa nang yayain niya ay minabuti ko na lang na umalis dahil ayaw kong may magawa kaming pagsisisihan namin sa huli.

Ang totoo, hindi ko alam kung saan ko nakukuha ang lakas at pagpipigil na walang mangyari sa aming dalawa. Though I feel like Imara was just waiting for me to make a move, I still doesn't have the gut to do it. Kahit na gustong-gusto ko rin 'yon bilang lalaki and it has been a ages since I bedded someone.

My past relationship was almost all about sex. Ngayong siya ang girlfriend ko, gusto kong dahan-dahanin dahil ibang-iba siya sa mga babaeng nagdaan sa buhay ko. I don't really want to make a mistake and I also want to give her time. Gusto kong kapag handang-handa na rin siya at hindi lang nadadala sa tensiyon at kasiyahan sa aming relasyon ngayon.

My sister's couldn't stop bugging me about Imara especially Somerset. Sa lahat ay siya talaga ang present at gustong usisain ang love life ko. She was so happy for me. She said that Imara and I were a match and everyone already loves her. Talagang nasa akin na lang kung kailan siya opisyal na gagawing parte ng aming pamilya.

"What do you think about marriage? I mean, just a random question. Gusto ko lang malaman if you're a fan of it." I asked Imara one night.

"I am. I grew up with strict parents, but I also witnessed the love that they have for each other. It wasn't that marvelous and they also have up and downs, but I still want that for myself. I want someone I can grow old with, you know."

"Your parents are lovely."

"They are. Lahat ay ginagawa nila para sa amin ng mga kapatid ko kaya naiintindihan ko rin ang pagiging istrikto nila sa amin lalo na sa akin. Gaya ng parents mo, they also want me to have someone I can lean on to. Gano'n din sa mga kapatid ko. Oh, I told them about the dinner and they couldn't wait for it."

"You told them about me?"

"I did. Excited na rin sila."

"Well, that's a relief."

She giggled and then paused for a moment. 

"I love you, Euxerre... I never met someone so humble, honest, and gentlemen like you. And honestly, you made me believe that true love exists. Na pwede rin sa aking mangyari ang bagay na 'to."

"Of course, baby. Why would you think you don't deserved true love?"

"I don't know. Growing up, my parents feed us with the idea of a partner and not a lover. Hindi importante kung mahal mo. Mas maigi kung oo pero it was just a secondary thing when it comes to having a husband. Have I told you na ilang beses na rin akong muntik nang ipakasal?"

"You told me about men, but not that. You're stubborn and firm when we first me. I wonder how your parents handle pairing you with strangers."

"Right. I'm a bit rebellious when it comes to this. I always hated the idea. Well, lahat naman siguro ng taong pinipilit sa ayaw nilang gawin ay 'yon ang magiging reaction, 'di ba?"

"True."

"But unfortunately, it's a job for us. Para lang sa pamilya at sa negosyo."

"But that change now, right? There's true love between us." I insisted.

"Right, pero mali ang mga kapatid mong maswerte ka sa akin dahil ang totoo ay ako ang napakaswerte sa 'yo. Any woman you choose to love will be the luckiest."

"Ikaw na ang mahal ko, at ikaw na lang ang gusto kong mahalin, Imara..."

Kahit na punong-puno ng pagmamahal ang puso ko ay hindi ko maiwasang mag-isip ng iba dahil sa pagbabago ng kanyang tono. As if she was worried about something so big, she couldn't tell me about it. Kahit na wala naman kaming problema and everything is going according to plan, there was something that was still holding her back from being in bliss with me.

"I love you so much, Euxerre..." she finally answered. "Thank you for always making me happy."

"Pleasure is mine, love... You know what? Why don't we go to Thailand and have an excursion tomorrow?"

"Aren't you busy?"

"I can cancel anything for you, baby."

"No, please don't do that."

"I will. Isa pa, gusto kong makasama ka ulit ng matagal. Gusto kitang ma-solo ulit."

Lumawak ang ngiti ko, nai-imagine na namumula na naman ang pisngi niya. I love when she does that. It tickles my heart.

"Are you sure hindi ako magiging abala sa 'yo? I only have a meeting in the morning, but I could pretty much cancel everything for this trip, too."

"So we're all set?"

She giggled. Iyon na ang tanda na sumasang-ayon na siya sa panibago naming trip na magkasama at bumuo ng mga bagong alaala.

I called my secretary to help me with our trip. Ilang oras lang ay tumawag na ito at sinabing settled na ang lahat. Wala sa sariling napangiti na lang ako at lutang na umalis sa kama upang puntahan ang vault sa kabilang banda ng aking silid.

My heartbeat quickened when I saw the small black box that has been on my vault since the day I asked Imara to be my girlfriend. Inside was a 30 carat round brilliant cut diamond ring I bought to propose to her.

Unang-una iyon sa dinala ko para sa trip namin sa Thailand. Because just like what she said, the love we have right now is true and I don't think I can still let go of that. Kaya naman matapos naming maglibot buong araw sa Koh Samui ay walang pag-aalinlangan ko nang itinanong sa kanya ang noon pa ma'y gusto na nang puso kong mabigyan ng sagot.

"I don't want to pressure you and I will not be swayed away if you turn me down today because I can still wait, but I don't think this ring could stay long in my vault without you knowing about this and my true intentions," she was now surprise, her tears were about to fall as she watched me on my knees while proclaiming my love for her.

"Imara Loverly Hoffman, I love you so deeply and I want you to know that I'm ready to take care and cherish you my whole life so please... will you marry me?"

Inihanda ko ang puso sa posible niyang sagot. We had such a great time at the beach today and I want to end it with my proposal kaya naman abot langit ang dasal kong sana ay marinig ang gusto kong sagot sa aking tanong.

"Euxerre..."

"It's okay. You can say no—"

"Yes," she cut me off. "Of course I want to marry you, too."

"B-baby..."

"I said yes!" umiiyak niyang pag-uulit pagkatapos ay iginalaw ang kamay kaya naman lutang kong agad na naisuot ang singsing sa kanya. 

Mabilis niya akong hinila paahon sa buhangin. She hugged me so tight as she continued sobbing because of happiness.

"Oh God! I love you! Thank you!" buong puso kong sambit at wala nang pag-aalinlangan siyang hinalikan ng masuyo sa labi. Finally sealing the best day of our life with a faithful kiss.

# CHAPTER 11

Chapter Eleven

Gentleman

The love I was feeling being someone's fiancé finally made me forgot about anything else. Para bang sa isang iglap ay nagbago ang buhay ko at ang mga gusto kong pagtuonan ng pansin. Kung noon ay puro trabaho, now that I am committed and about to get married, all I could ever think of was the life with my future wife, Imara. 

We haven't told anyone about our engagement until the day our families had proper dinner together. Everyone was ecstatic to see each other. Imara was as usual perfect in my eyes, but this was one of those times our vibes were off. 

"Are you alright? Masama na naman ba ang pakiramdam mo?"

"No, I'm fine. I'm just a little nervous I think." She tried smiling sweetly at me. Pinagdiin ko ang aking mga labi at hinalikan na lang ang kanyang kamay.

She loves it when I did that. Ngumiti lang siya at muli akong pinasalamatan. Everyone was happy. Masaya akong makitang muli ang kanyang mga magulang. Habang nasa hapag ay hindi mapatid ang usapan lalo na tungkol sa aming kasal. Everyone was already expecting it. 

Hindi ko binitiwan ang kamay ni Imara. She was smiling and all that, but there was this familiar vibe that wasn't falling into place. Buong gabi akong nag-alala.

"I'm sorry my other daughters couldn't come, but rest assured they'll turn up in the wedding. No one could missed that right, Soronious and Imara?"

"Yes mom." My fiancée answered, tumango naman ako bilang segunda sa kanyang sagot.

"Oh this is really a surprise, you two! Hindi ako makapaniwalang magbubunga rin ang mga pangungulit namin sa 'yo, Imara. You see, you hit the jackpot with Soronious! I'm so happy to see you in love and about to finally get married!" Her mother said using her happiest pitch. 

"Thanks mom."

"I'm lucky having your daughter, too, Mrs. Hoffman. Sobrang swerte ko rin kay Imara."

The latter turned her gaze at me, hindi ko alam pero parang may kung ano sa salita kong bago sa kanyang pandinig. It made her emotional.

"Y-you mean that?"

"Of course, baby... I mean everything I said to you. I'm an honest man, remember?"

She smiled and nodded. Humigpit na rin ang kapit niya sa aking kamay at natigil lang 'yon nang dumating na ang main course.

Kahit paano ay naging kalmado na rin siya. She began mingling especially with my sisters and everyone was so happy with the event. Nang matapos ay nagpasya kaming maunang umalis. We went to went to Tagaytay because she said she wanted to do some road trip. We went to Highlands and decided to stay there for the night.

"I don't want you to think so much about our wedding. Long engagement is fine with me."

"I don't think my parents would be happy to hear that. Did you see how happy they are? Ngayon ko lang sila nakitang gano'n na parang nanalo sa lotto. I'm sure kung wala ang family mo baka nagpumilit na 'yon na ikasal tayo bukas. That's how keen and excited they are about us."

I smiled and welcomed her beside me. Inabutan ko siya ng red wine. Halos maubos niya kaagad iyon.

"Easy baby..."

Ilang beses pa siyang napabuntong-hininga.

"I can talk to them about the long engagement if you want."

"No, it's okay. I can handle it. Besides, we're in love and it will happen whether we like it or now so let's just go on with it. Let's plan our wedding."

"I like the idea of marrying you, but I still don't want to pressure you if you're not ready. Sabi ko nga no'ng nag-propose ako 'di ba? Kahit umayaw ka okay lang. I can wait until you're fine doing it. I'm sure they will understand. I'll make them if they don't."

Natungga na niya ang laman ng hawak na wine glass. Sinalinan ko ulit ang kanyang baso. We talked more until we finished a bottle. She wanted something hard and I gave her tequila. It was the first time I see her drink this much, but I couldn't stop her. Sinabayan ko na lang.

"You're really handsome..." namumungay ang mga mata na niyang sambit habang titig na titig sa akin. 

My face heated because of that. "Am I? Ngayon mo lang 'yan na-realize?"

She laughed. "Kaso medyo mayabang."

"No I'm not. It's just that it's old news. Everyone already knows that."

"Psh, yabang."

Natawa na lang din ako at tinigilan na siyang patulan. The conversation went slow as we emptied the bottle of tequila. We were both tipsy at hindi na maganda ang estado ng pag-iisip ko lalo na't sa bawat galaw niya ay lumalabas na ang kalahati ng kanyang dibdib sa suot na puting silk dress. She was really tempting. Noon pa man ay sexually attracted na rin ako sa kanya at kapag hindi pa ako umiwas ay baka tuluyan nang matapos ang lahat ng mga pagpipigil ko.

"Kiss me, Euxerre. Help me forget the pressure of everything." 

And so I did. It was a slow and careful kiss. I stopped it before it poisoned my mind pero bago pa ako tuluyang makaiwas ay walang sabi na niyang iginalaw ang sarili pakandong sa aking ibabaw pagkatapos ay sabik na sabik akong muling sinibasib ng halik!

Dama kong nawalan ng lakas ang aking kamay at agad na nabitiwan ang hawak na baso just so I could held her body as she started to deepened the kiss. Hirap na hirap akong itigil 'yon dahil dama ko ang matinding kagustohan niya sa pakiusap. She never wanted a simple kiss. And I'm afraid she will not be fine with 
just
 that. 

Kumawala ang ungol sa aking bibig sa uhaw at lalim ng kanyang paghalik sa akin. She never kissed me like this before. Gusto ko tuloy sisihin ang sarili dahil alam kong gawa 'yon ng alak. 

"I-Imara..." I whispered after successfully breaking the kiss. Parehas kaming hingal na hingal at halos malagutan na ng hininga.

"It's just Imara now? How about the endearments? I kind of like hearing you call me baby so just call me that." 

"Imara, stop..." mabilis kong sambit matapos iwasan ang kanyang mga labi. "I know you feel how hard you're making me right now, but I don't think we should do this."

"What do you mean we shouldn't? Don't you like it?"

"No, I do! Damn, I always wanted to, but I don't really think we should. I think it's best for us to save it for later. Maybe after the wedding?"

Imbes na makakuha ng sang-ayon ay natataranta niyang inayos ang sarili at nagmamadaling lumayo sa akin.

"Imara."

"No, I'm going to sleep. I'll use the room upstairs and please don't try chase me."

"Imara, please—"

"Good night, Euxerre." She cut me off before finally storming out of the living room.

I cursed when my feet couldn't ran after her anymore. Nanghihina akong napabalik sa pagkakaupo dahil sa biglaang panghihina ng mga tuhod ko.

Shit, what have I done? 

Bigo kong nasabunutan ang aking buhok. I immediately called Vlasta so I won't go crazy. Glad he was awake. Sandali kaming nag-usap. Nang matapos ay bumalik na ako sa tutulugan kong silid. 

I never expected things to turn out like this. Damn it, we started so good. Bakit ba kasi baliw ako at gusto pang dahan-dahanin ang lahat when she clearly wanted it, too? 

Ilang oras akong walang ginawa kung hindi ang isipin si Imara. Ilang beses kong binalik-balikan ang kanyang silid para sana katukin pero hindi ko na magawa. I just texted her a long ass apology message and that helped me put to sleep.

Maaga kaming umalis kinabukasan. Parehas kaming walang kibo. She didn't reply to my text. Binati naman ako pero iyon lang 'yon. She was still mad.

"Just drop me off the office."

"Can we atleast have some proper breakfast and talk about what happened?"

"I need to be at work by nine."

Bigo akong tumango. Ilang oras ang lumipas matapos makarating sa SLEX ay hindi ko na napigilang magsalita ulit.

"I'm sorry again. Kung iniisip mong hindi ako attracted sa 'yo dahil natanggihan kita ay nagkakamali ka. You don't have any idea how much I wanted to do all that with you but—"

"We don't have to talk about it. You're right. Maybe we need to wait until we get married."

"Imara..."

"Please just drive. My head hurts and I don't have the mood the argue with you."

Hindi na ako nagsalita. Inintindi ko na lang ang kanyang mga sinabi. I dropped her off of her office and that was it. Kahit na masakit din ang ulo ko ay minabuti kong lunurin na lang ang sarili sa trabaho.

I sent flowers, foods, and more long text messages to still apologize to her, but I received no response. 

I gave her time, but I didn't stop blaming myself for being such a fucking gentlemen. Paano kung dahil doon makipaghiwalay siya sa akin? Paano kung dahil doon, manlamig siya? What if she realized I was too fucking dull and boring to put up with for the rest of her life? Na hindi talaga ako ang gusto niya?

All those questions fucked with my head big time. Ilang beses kong sinubukang tawagan siya pero hindi siya sumagot. Kahit ang mga texts ay walang reply. 

Para akong mababaliw sa dalawang araw na hindi siya nagparamdam. Classic and fucking gentleman me just waited for everything between us to cool down until one day I finally received a text from her saying that she wanted us to talk but not soon. Bumawi na lang ako sa pagsuyo sa kanya hanggang sa mapag-usapan naming ayusin na ang gusot sa pagitan naming dalawa.

I felt a huge relief when we finally met a week later. She looked fine but I still apologize for what I did. Buong durasyon nga ng pagkikita namin ay humingi lang ako ng tawad. She said I was forgiven. Nahiya lang daw siya para sa sarili. I explained my side and told her I was just being a gentleman. That I want to do things differently this time because I don't want to make mistakes. That I respect her so much. 

I was glad she understood. We made up and dated again the next week. Everything has gone smoothly again. Walang tigil ang kasiyahan sa bawat date na parang walang nangyaring tampuhan. Everything was calm again... until it wasn't. Until I saw her one night... in the arms of another man.

# CHAPTER 12

Chapter Twelve

Shattered Heart

"Are you okay? Do you need anything? I'm about to leave the office so if you need anything please tell me."

"No, I'm fine. I just have a bad headache. Kailangan ko lang ng pahinga. Sorry kung hindi ako makakapunta sa dinner natin ngayon." 

"No please, don't be. I understand. Okay lang. Take the rest that you need. I'm fine. Besides, ano ba naman 'yung isang gabing ma-mi-miss kita?"

"Oh Eux... That makes me feel bad."

"It's okay, baby... Susunduin ko lang si Saryna tapos diretso na kami sa bahay. Magpahinga ka na. We'll talk soon, alright? Bawi na lang tayo next time kapag mas maayos na ang pakiramdam mo."

"Sorry ulit."

"Stop apologizing now. It's okay, love. It's okay..." mas malumanay kong sagot dahilan para tumigil na siya.

Pagkababa ng tawag ay tinapos ko na rin ang trabaho ko dahil nagpapasundo sa akin si Saryna sa club. Siguro ay lasing na naman ito at kailangan ako para makalusot kina mommy. I don't mind. Mas gusto ko pang ganito ka-bukas sa akin ang mga kapatid ko. I want myself to be the first thing who comes in their mind when they were in trouble. Gusto kong bago ang ibang tao ay sa akin sila nagtitiwala. Damien already called me when I missed to answer Saryna's first call. Hindi daw niya masusundo at nagpapaumanhin kaya ako na lang talaga ang pag-asa ng kapatid ko.

"Where you at? Malapit na kami."

"I'm drunk kuya, Nio. I'm so sorry. I know I told you the last time was the last time, but it's my friend's birthday so I had to go and celebrate the day with her."

"Alright, I understand. Can you come outside the bar now? We're almost at the entrance."

"I don't think I can, kuya. Everyone is already drunk. My world is spinning already. 
Fucking patron
. Fuck, my head hurts and I think I'm about to puke!"

Wala sa sariling napapikit ako nang marinig ang pagsuka ni Saryna sa kabilang linya pagkatapos na pagkatapos sabihin ang salitang 'yon. I cut the line and asked Vlasta to hurry up, but because it was Saturday night, talagang nag-traffic sa entrance ng club.

Imbes na ibigay pa sa valet ay walang pakialam na lang naming iniwan ni Vlasta ang sasakyan sa mismong harapan ng exclusive club. Nang makilala naman ako ng mga empleyado ay walang nagawa ang mga ito. They even accompanied us inside to look for my sister, but my feet was put to stop when my eyes immediately locked to a girl walking towards my direction. 

Pakiramdam ko ay may biglang sumakal ng mahigpit sa aking leeg nang tuluyan nang makita ang kanyang kabuuan.

Are my eyes betraying me? What is she doing here? Ang sabi niya ay may sakit siya kaya hindi siya makakapunta sa dinner namin pero anong ginagawa niya rito sa club? 

Did my fiancée just... lied to me?

Bago pa ako masagot ng natitirang katinuan sa aking utak ay para na akong pinagsakluban ng langit at lupa nang makita ang halos patakbong pagsunod sa kanya ng isang lalaki at walang sabing paghila sa kanyang kamay upang ilapit sa katawan nito. Before I could even react to it, the man already savored her lips like he was craving for it the whole night. Ang mas malala, my fiancée answered the man with the same intensity and passion, leaving me with nothing but a shattered heart.

I blacked out. The next thing I knew, I was being pulled by the security after continuously punching the man my girlfriend just kissed. 

Everything was happening so fast yet I feel like time was standing still. Kita at dama ko ang bawat paglapat ng malalakas kong kamao sa mukha ng lalaki. I watched Vlasta pulling me away from the man. May mga dumalo na ring security nang hindi niya magawa. The place became quiet and all I could hear was the horror to Imara's voice. She was shouting and crying while begging for me to stop, but I just couldn't. Hindi ko alam kung anong demonyo ang sumapi sa akin at bigla akong naging bayolente.

I was never a mad man. Kaya kong timpiin ang sarili ko lalo na pagdating sa galit pero sa pagkakataong ito ay parang hindi na ako ang sarili ko. 

I could feel the bones in my hand breaking while I continuously disintegrate the man's skull. I could feel many hands trying to stop me. They were all not successful for minutes until some customers from the bar helped them, too. 

Pakiramdam ko ay mawawalan na ako ng hangin sa baga nang sa wakas ay mailayo nila ako sa wala nang malay na lalaki. Hinang-hina ang buo kong katawan at nagsisimula ko nang maramdaman ang kirot ng aking mga kamao pero nang mapunta ang mga mata ko kay Imara na agad dinaluhan nakabulagtang lalaki para tignan kung buhay pa ay pakiramdam ko may namatay sa akin.

Bago pa ako makagalaw at makapag-isip ng kung ano ay nahila na ako ni Vlasta palayo. Sa aming paglabas ng club ay nakita ko ang kapatid kong nakatayo sa labas ng aming sasakyan. Her brows furrowed when she saw us, but then she was shocked to see my state.

"What happened, kuya? Bakit punong-puno ng dugo ang mga kamay mo?!" nag-aalala niyang tanong, tila nawala ang kalasingan habang palayo na kami sa bar.

Wala akong naisagot sa kanya at nanatili lang na tulala. I didn't even bother checking my hands even when the pain was starting to kick in.

"Vlasta? What happened? And where are we going?!"

"We're on our way to the hospital. I already called your dad and told him you are with us. Sinabi ko na rin sa kanya ang nangyari sa kuya mo."

"Then tell me what happened! Nagpasundo lang ako pero mukhang nakipag-away pa kayo! It is your fault! Sinong kaaway mo at bakit nadamay ang kuya ko?!"

"It's not my fault."

"You're such a fucking liar! Hindi nakikipag-away si kuya! You're fucking going to lose your job you idiot! Wala kang kwenta!"

"I swear it was not my fault. Nakita ni Eux si Imara na nakikipaghalikan sa ibang lalaki sa bar na 'yon."

Doon natahimik ang kapatid ko at pagkatapos ay awang-awang napabaling sa akin. Sunod-sunod naman akong napalunok nang muling umulit sa utak ko ang mga sinabi ni Vlasta.

"Turn the car around. I just want to go home."

"Kuya you need to go to the hospital—"

"I said turn the fucking car around! Hindi ko kailangan ng hospital! And you," Napaatras si Saryna nang siya naman ang balingan ko, nabanaag ko ang takot sa kanyang mukha. 

"Stop talking dahil sa ating dalawa ay mas matino kaysa sa 'yo ang utak ko so just stop now, Saryna!"

Halos maiyak siya sa aking pagsigaw pero hindi ko na mabawi. I don't know what just got into me, but I feel like a different person. Nagsisisi man akong nasigawan siya pero hindi ko na gusto pang magsalita upang bawiin ang lahat ng mga pagalit. 

Walang nagawa si Vlasta kung hindi ang sundin ako. Nang makarating sa bahay ay nagpapasalamat akong hindi pa nakakababa sila mommy kaya malaya akong nakadiretso sa kwarto ko.

"Tell everyone to leave me alone. Walang kakatok, walang lalapit sa kwarto ko, at walang maghahanap sa 'kin, maliwanag ba?" I said to Vlasta who was following me.

"But Nio—"

"Even you," I cut him harshly. "Don't follow me. Just let me be alone, Vlasta."

His feet was put to halt after I said that. Kahit na nag-uumapaw pa rin ang pag-aalala sa kanyang ekspresyon para sa akin ay wala na siyang nagawa kung hindi ang sundin ang mga utos ko. Even though it was clear that we are friends, I am still technically his boss kaya ako pa rin ang masusunod.

I locked my door when I finally got to my room. I went to the sink and tried washing the blood on my hand. Masakit at namamaga na ang mga iyon. I clearly needed some medical attention, but I just want to be alone. 

Ilang beses akong napangiwi habang tinatanggal ang mga natuyong dugo pero pakiramdam ko ay hindi matapos-tapos ang ginagawa ko dahil sa muling pagbalik sa utak ko ng mga nangyari.

Imara, my fiancée just ran after the man she kissed after the scene I created. Hindi sa akin, hindi para humingi ng tawad at magpaliwanag kung hindi sa lalaking kasama niya sa panggagago sa akin.

I thought we were fine. Akala ko maayos kami dahil wala naman kaming pinag-awayan at mas lalong nagsisimula na kaming mag-plano para sa aming kasal kaya bakit? Did she cheated on me because I won't have sex with her? Masyado pa rin bang big deal sa kanya na nagawa ko siyang tanggihan at piniling gagawin lang 'yon kapag kasal na kami? Was she really 
that
 hungry for sex? 

Tama ba ang nararamdaman ko o nabulag na lang ako sa pagmamahal ko para sa kanya? Kasi noong una, alam ko namang ganito siya. Wild, liberated, yet I discarded all that because I want to give it a chance and I already forgot all that about herself so why? bakit niya ako nagawang gaguhin? Bukod sa sex ay wala na akong iba pang maisip na dahilan. 

Damn it, I was fooled. And I hated it so much. 

Bigo kong naitukod ang mga kamay ko sa lababo, hindi na natapos ang paghuhugas at hindi ininda ang sakit dahil natalo na naman ako ng aking mga luha. 

What did I do wrong? All these time naman wala akong ginawa kung hindi maging totoo at iparamdam sa kanya ang pagmamahal ko. If this was just a game to her, then I'm not interested. I don't fucking want it.

Hinayaan ko ang sarili kong ilabas ang lahat ng sama ng loob. I continued crying and asking myself why. Saka lang ako natigil nang marinig ang pagtunog ng aking telepono. It was Imara. Alam ko na ang sasabihin niya at hindi ako handang marinig ang lahat ng 'yon kaya nang sagutin ko ay hindi ko siya binigyan ng pagkakataong makapagsalita.

"I don't want to hear anything from you so please don't fucking call me again, Imara. We're fucking done." walang preno kong sabi pagkatapos ay agad na ibinaba ang tawag.

# CHAPTER 13

Chapter Thirteen

Ruthlessness And Power

Sabi nila mas mabuting umiwas ka kapag galit at huwag nang magsalita dahil iba ang nagiging mentalidad natin kapag masyadong mataas ang ating emosyon at baka may masabi tayong pagsisisihan natin kapag humupa na ang lahat. In my case, I didn't regret a single thing. Kahit nahimasmasan na ako, kahit na dalawang araw na ang lumipas simula nang mahuli ko si Imara na may kahalikang lalaki ay hindi nagbabago ang desisyon kong tapos na kami. 

We're done and that was clearer that a crystal.

"Sir, Miss Hoffman came here again today and is looking for you. She says it's urgent and—"

"How many times did I tell you to stop calling me just for that? I said call me if only there's something important you need tell me about my meetings, but this is not it. This is bullshit."

"I'm sorry, Sir!"

Agad ko nang ibinaba ang tawag at iritang napabalik sa kama dahil doon. My family was worried of me. Simula ng gabing 'yon kahit na sinabi ko na kay Imara na huwag na huwag siyang tatawag dahil tapos na kami ay hindi ito natigil sa pangungulit. She even called my sisters to help her talk to me, but only Nia entertained her call. Alam na nilang tatlo ang ginawa sa akin ng babae dahil sinabi iyon ni Vlasta kay Saryna. Everyone hated her, but my twin was still calm about it. Siya lang ang nagpapaliwanag sa mahinahong paraan dahil ang dalawa ay baka kung ano pa ang magawa sa kanya.

I haven't told about my parents what really happened. Ang alam lang ni daddy ay nakipag-away ako. Good thing it was only his men who fixed things at the bar at bago pa masabi sa kanya ang totoong dahilan kung bakit sa unang pagkakataon ay nakipag-basag ulo ako ay naagapan ko na 'yon. Hindi rin sinasabi ng mga kapatid ko out of respect for me. They all want me to announce it myself pero hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa magawa. 

I stayed in my room since that day. Halos hindi ako lumabas. Wala akong ganang kumain pero minsan ay ginagawa ko dahil ayaw kong sobrang mag-alala sa akin si mommy. 

My sisters forced me to have my hands checked and so I did, pero hanggang ngayon ay masakit pa rin. The doctor covered the wounds and gave me medicine for the pain. Good thing wala namang nabasag talagang buto. It was now looking fine, but what my heart suffered from that night became worst. 

I never got so broken hearted like this. Kahit iyong babaeng unang minahal ko ng matagal. This one really sucks because I rooted for this. I had high hopes yet it broke me completely. Ang masama ay hindi ko alam kung saan ako nagkamali. The wondering where did I go wrong part always kills some part of me whenever I think of it. 

Nag-igting ang aking panga nang muli iyong maalala. I stood up and got myself some alcohol. Being in my room was fucking me up, but I don't want to be seen by anyone. Especially in this state. I am being anxious every time I think that I failed. Alam na ng mga kakilala ko ang tungkol sa kanya. Our engagement were already published and known and I was afraid that I might hear something that will crush me again the moment I step out of my chamber. 

Damn, I hate being a loser in this game. This is by far the greatest humiliation of all time for me. 

Naging desperado ba ako ng sobra? Did my idea of us—that love, was only an excitement to fulfill for my parents' life long dream for me? My obligation as part of the Rozovsky family? Was I just too excited to that idea that it blinded me and thought about it as love?

I emptied a bottle of whiskey while I tried answering those questions. I called Vlasta to ask him to joined me. Wala naman siyang magawa dahil ako ang boss niya at iyon ang utos ko. He looked miserable like me. Ito ang unang beses naming nagkita ulit at nag-usap ng masinsinan pagkatapos ng araw na 'yon.

"Are you okay? how are you feeling?" he asked in the middle of our random conversation.

"Fine. My hands are healing."

"That's good."

"What?" I asked when he stared at me suspiciously.

"Did she contact you?"

Bigo akong tumango. I contemplated telling him about the last thing I said to Imara and what entails that decision, but I needed to let it out so I did.

Gulat ang unang ekspresyon niya. Sa ilang segundo ay hindi siya napakali sa harapan ko. I kept drinking. He told me his worries. Kung ano na ang susunod na mangyayari. I told him the truth that I have no idea what was next, but I am firm with that decision. 

I am Soronious Euxerre Rozovsky, son of the most powerful and formidable man Thelonious Auxerre Rozovsky, and grandson of the most ruthless man who made everyone kneel in front of him. The ruthlessness and power runs in my blood and that alone was a clear sign that I should never settle for less. Kung tutuusin, I could ruin Imara with just one call, but there's always gentleness inside me because I am also a La Casse. Kayang magtiis at handang maging mabuti na lang para sa ikatatahimik ng lahat. 

Naghiwalay kami ni Vlasta nang malasing na ito. I was drunk as well, but I continued drinking even when I'm alone again. Gusto ko na lang palaging maabot ang pinakasukdulan ng limit ko sa alak para makatulog na lang ako at hindi na mag-isip pa. That was what I did until someone knocked on my door. 

I called Vlasta but he was not answering his phone. It was already almost midnight. I called Somerset, but she kept declining my call. Nagpatuloy ang mga pagkatok kaya napilitan na akong buksan 'yon, but to my surprise, it was not Soms or any of my sister.

Literal na muntik na akong mahulog sa sahig matapos agad na mapaatras nang makita si Imara na nasa harapan ko. Ilang beses akong napakurap pero totoong narito nga siya.

"Euxerre..."

"What are you doing here? Who let you inside our house?"

I stepped back again when she hurriedly entered my room and locked my door. Hindi ako makapag-isip ng maayos. I wanted to push her outside, but the alcohol keeps clouding my mind. 

"Get out, Imara. Leave before I call someone to drag you out of my room—"

"We need to talk... I need to talk to you personally—"

"And what? Para mabilog mo ang ulo ko?" I scoffed when tears immediately formed her eyes. 

"You think you can't change my decision by crying and begging in front of me?"

"Euxerre—"

"I know what I saw and my decision is already final. Wala ka nang magagawa dahil tinapos ko na ang lahat sa atin at wala ng dahilan pa para mag-usap tayong dalawa kaya umalis ka na."

"I'm sorry... I won't justify what I did because it was my fault, but please... please give me a chance."

"A chance?! Naririnig mo ba ang sarili mo? just like that, huh? what do you think of me, a saint?!"

"Eux—"

"I said get out of my room and leave now!"

Hindi siya natinag kahit na sumisigaw na ako, muli ay damang-dama na naman ang galit na sasabog na sa aking buong pagkatao. I was about to say more pero hindi ko nagawa nang malaglag ang mga mata niya sa aking kamao.

Bago pa ako makapagsalita ay walang sabing nahawakan na niya ang mga iyon, tila ba gulat na gulat na iyon ang napala ko dahil sa kagagawan niya.

"I'm sorry, Euxerre... I'm sorry I did this to you—"

Marahas kong hinawi ang aking kamay at walang sabi siyang naitulak palayo. Mabuti na lang hindi iyon masyadong malakas para matumba siya sa sahig!

I wanted to shout at her. Gusto ko na siyang kaladkarin palabas pero nang makita kong tuluyan nang nag-unahang malaglag ang kanyang mga luha ay hindi na ako nakagalaw sa aking kinatatayuan. My heart felt more pain when she dropped to the floor and kneel just to beg for my mercy. My jaw tightened when she got on all fours. Ang mukha niya ang nasa gitna ng aking mga paa, nagmamakaawa.

"I'm sorry... I don't know what to say anymore. It's my fault. I lied to you. I kissed someone else, but it was nothing I swear. I won't do it again, Eux... I'm begging you please give me another chance..."

"Get up."

Bigo at hirap niya akong tiningala. She was catching her breath like this was the first time she cried heavily and did this.

"I said get up, Imara." malamig at may pagbabantang pag-uulit ko ng mga salita kaya wala siyang nagawa kung hindi ang sundin kaagad ako.

I was still so mad and I know it in my heart, but when I get to stare at her face while her tears continuously falls down her cheeks, I almost lost it again. Para bang may kung anong glitch sa pagkatao kong biglang naawa at gustong maging marupok kaagad sa kanya, yakapin siya, at sabihing kalimutan na lang namin ang lahat. It kept punching my heart as I stare at her face for almost a minute. I knew it came from my La Casse side, but before the gentleness dominated my whole-being, my Rozovsky side already took over by kissing her hard and putting her on my bed.

I would normally stop whenever I hear her whimper because I don't want her to get hurt, but the anger and pain my heart was feeling didn't care about all that. All it cared was the punishment I wanted to give her for cheating on me. At 'yon ang ginawa ko.

Hindi ko binitiwan ang kanyang mga labi. I kissed her the way only fucking could satisfy it. Habang hinalikan ay hinuhubad ko na ang kanyang mga saplot sa katawan. I was quick and harsh with every move. I stopped myself for adoring the sweet scent and taste of her skin just for the sake of her deserved punishment. Ilang beses kong narinig ang ambang pagmamakaawa niya, but it all stopped when my mouth began roaming in her naked body.

"Ohhh!" she whimpered, her body was shaking when I finally put one of her hard nipple on my mouth. 

I caressed her breast and suck it like a baby yearning for it. Muli siyang napaungol nang malakas nang ilipat ko sa kabila ang aking mga labi at halos kagatin ang tuktok no'n dahil sa gigil. 

I wanted her to moan louder. I wanted to do everything these men did to her. Ang pag-iisip no'n ang naging dahilan kung bakit mas bumilis at rumahas ang bawat galaw ko sa kanyang katawan. I didn't even take any of my clothes off when I parted her legs while still kissing and sucking her nipples. Ibinaba ko lang ang boxer ko, hinawi ang kanyang panty at walang sabi nang idiniin ang sarili sa kanyang pagkababae.

My plan was to never stop until she begged me to. Gusto kong ipakita at ipadama sa kanya lahat ng matagal ko nang pinipigilan dahil sa mataas kong respeto sa kanya. Now, all I wanted was her to know how beastly I could get when it comes to sex. That I could be the best fuck she could ever have, but all of my plans were ruined when I heard her whimpered in so much pain and shocked after my long and hard shaft broke her hymen.

Sunod-sunod akong napalunok at bahagyang nahimasmasan sa naramdaman at natanto.

"I-Imara..." lutang kong sambit, nanghihinang hinayaang malaglag ang katawan sa kanyang ibabaw. 

She was still crying when she stared at me. Pakiramdam ko ay nawala ang lahat ng epekto ng alak dahil sa aking nadiskubre.

"Y-you're still..." 

Hindi ko maituloy ang sasabihin. She forced a smile and wrapped her palms around my face. May pagsusumamo at pagmamahal ang kanyang titig. Natauhan ako at wala nang ibang naramdaman kung hindi ang matinding pagsisisi.

"You're my first."

Akmang aalis na ako sa kanyang ibabaw nang ilingkis niya ang kanyang mga paa sa aking bewang upang pigilan ako pagkatapos ay umiling.

"Just continue, Eux... I want you to take me fully... please, just continue fucking and punishing me..."

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✨

CHAPTER 14

Chapter Fourteen

Do It Slow

What I found out change the whole course of my sanity. She kept begging for me to continue, but I just laid on top of her while my cock was buried on her virgin pussy.

“Y-you’re a virgin…” lutang kong pag-uulit nang makabawi habang nakatitig lang sa kanya. “H-how did that… happen?”

“Eux—” hindi niya natapos ang sasabihin nang walang sabi akong umangat palayo sa kanya at hinugot ang sarili pagkatapos ay bahagyang lumayo.

I sat on the edge of my bed. I was so damn confused. Lasing lang ba ako? Was she really pure? Gusto ko na sanang kwestiyunin ang mentalidad ko pero malinaw sa dugong nangingintab sa aking kahabaan na totoo ang nalaman ko. I really just ripped her hymen.

I didn’t looked at her when the bed moved. Sa gilid ng aking mga mata ay kinuha niya ang comforter pagkatapos ay ibinalot sa kanyang katawan pagkatapos ay lumapit at umupo sa tabi ko.

“I-I’m your first…”

Nalaglag ang mga mata ko nang walang sabi niyang ipagsalikop ang aming mga kamay. She pressed her hand gently and firmly on mine.

“You haven’t taken me fully yet and that’s not how I want to remember my first. You already started it so you must finish it now, Eux.”

I swallowed the bile on my throat when I looked back at her. May mga kiss mark siya sa leeg at itaas ng dibdib dahil sa gigil kong pag-angkin kanina.

“But how? All this time I thought you’re liberated. Hell, I saw you the first night we met with a waiter and last week you cheated on me so how come you’re still a virgin?”

Sunod-sunod ang paglunok niya nang makipagtitigan na akong muli sa kanyang mga mata ngunit sa pagtulong muli ng kanyang mga luha ay tuluyan nang napawi ang lahat ng galit at sama ng loob kong naramdaman. I raised my hand to wipe her tears. Hinila ko pa siya para isandal sa aking balikat. I closed my eyes when I kissed her hair.

“I’m sorry… I know you’re still mad at me for what I did, but I told you it was nothing. I guess I just did that because deep in my heart I still feel like you’re not that sexually attracted to me so I needed another man’s attention to prove me wrong. To know that I am fine. Na walang mali sa akin dahil tinanggihan mo ako ng gabing ’yon.”

“Oh please… I told you my reasons, baby…” I said now facing her with both of my palms on her face, wiping her tears.

“You don’t have any idea how attracted I am to you. Na sa tuwing nahahalikan kita para akong natutunaw. You made me feel things I never thought I was capable of feeling. Sa tuwing nararamdaman ko ang init mo gusto ko na lang mabaliw. Gusto kong ipadama sa ’yo lahat ng kagustohan kong angkinin ka, sambahin, markahan, pero pinipigilan ko dahil nirerespeto kita. I don’t want our relationship to focus on sex until we get married. I want to give you time to be completely ready for it because I don’t want you to regret it.”

Marahan kong idinikit ang aking noo sa kanya. Both of my thumb continued moving back and forth her cheeks. Masuyo kong hinagkan ang kanyang mga labi.

“I will not regret a thing and swear that date with that man was nothing. It’s you that I want. Mahal kita… mahal na mahal kita. I’m sorry, Euxerre… I’m so sorry for hurting you.”

Mabilis akong umiling. I stared at her eyes again and began shaking my head. Habang nakatitig sa kanya ay wala na akong maramdaman. As if what she did was already forgotten. As if it never happened.

Tuluyan na akong natalo at nakalma habang nakatitig sa kanya. Parang hindi ko na magawa pang magalit. There was something in her words that made me believed. Damang-dama kong mahal niya ako at iyon ang tumapos sa lahat ng sakit.

“I’m sorry for hurting you, too… Oh God baby, you should’ve told me.”

Umiling siya at bahagyang natawa. Napangiti na rin ako.

“You can make up to me by continuing it.”

“Are you sure?”

She nodded gently. “I don’t want to remember only pain for losing my virginity so please… give me something I should remember. Make love to me, Euxerre… Please just make love to me.”

Nang hindi pa ako makagalaw ay walang sabi na siyang lumipat sa aking ibabaw. She take my clothes off. Sa paglaglag ng comforter sa kanyang katawan ay napaawang na ang aking mga labi.

Seeing and holding her naked body for the second time gave me fear. Kung paano ko iayos ang kamay sa kanyang katawan ay walang-walang sa ginawa ko kanina. I held her like she was the most precious thing in the world. Buong pag-iingat ko siyang kinarga at muling ibinalik pahiga sa kama. She watched me removed all of the clothes that was left in my body. Ilang beses siyang napalunok nang tuluyan ko nang mahubad ang boxers ko at ngayon ay nakatitig na siya sa aking pagkalalaki.

“Are you really sure about this?”

She nodded vehemently. “Kiss me now, Euxerre… make love to me.”

And so I did. Kung paano ko siya halikan bago kami nag-away ay gano’n ko siya hinalikan ngayon. The kiss went from sweet and gentle to hungry and full of desire. Parehas kaming muling mabilis na nalunod sa kamunduhan.

“Ohhhh…” she moan when I started caressing her breasts while sucking and thumbing her nipples.

Now I understand why her body was shaking and so sensitive the first time my mouth and hands roamed in her body. Iyon ay dahil ako pa lang ang kauna-unahang lalaking nakagawa sa kanya ng ganito. I was the first man who kissed and touched her like this. Ako lang.

Imara’s mouth dropped open in a long moan of pleasure as she felt my cock’s head rubbing against her wet pussy and spreading the lips as it slowly thrust back inside her.

“Tell me to stop if it hurts so much.”

She nodded. I kissed her again and continued burying my shaft deeper inside. I felt her nails dug on my back as I sink deeper and deeper until I was fully inside her.

Nalunod ang mga ungol namin sa aming mga labi. Nagpatuloy kami sa paghahalikan. I knew she was in pain and I don’t want to hurt her again so I took my time and distracted her by my kisses. Nang maramdaman kong nalilibang na siya ay dahan-dahan kong hinugot ang sarili at mas mabagal na ibinaon ulit iyon sa kanyang pagkababae. I did it repeatedly until I felt her loosen up. Basang-basa at sobrang dulas na niya.

“How’s the pain, baby?” I asked now gasping as I control myself to stop fucking her fast because the pleasure I was getting inside her was already making me crazy.

“It’s not that painful anymore.”

I planted kisses on her cheeks. “Masarap na?”

She nodded. “Just do it slow. I want to feel you slowly, love…”

That made me smirked. Mas binagalan ko ang paggalaw kaya damang-dama ko lahat ng sensasyong ibinibigay na kanyang naglalawang pagkababae.

Nanatiling nakaawang ang kanyang bibig habang patuloy ako sa paggalaw sa kanyang ibabaw. I stopped kissing her. Bahagya akong umangat upang titigan ang aming mga kasariang nag-iisa. I concentrated pushing and pulling myself out of her with slow and gentle rhythm and each time I hear her moans, I would groaned.

“Ohhh!” Napahawak siya sa aking mga kamay nang igiling ko ang balakang bago may kaunting bilis na ipasok muli ang pagkalalaki sa kanya.

“Do you like that?”

“Uh-hmm. It feels good… oh gosh, so this is sex… it’s really something, huh?”

Natawa ako. “It’s not sex until you cum.”

“Orgasm?”

“Uh-hmm.”

“But wait… you don’t wear any condom.”

“Do you want me to?”

Walang pag-aalinlangan siyang umiling.

“They say it’s best when nothing on. Mas randam daw ng lalaki. Totoo ba? Do you… like it?”

Ako naman ang napatango. Wala sa sariling nakagat na rin ang labi. I don’t usally talk when fucking someone because I don’t want to be distracted, but even Imara’s voice was pleasure to my ears. I feel like that alone could make me cum.

“You’re my fiancée and we’re about to get married. I don’t think a condom is needed, too.”

“Ahhhh… that feels nice, baby…”

Nakagat ko ang aking labi at muling inulit ang ginawa. I now started doing the alphabet and she loved it. Imara made the most delicious sounds. She was moaning softly and lewdly when I hit the sensitive spots. Paunti-unti ay bumibilis na ang aking mga paggalaw. Muli kong ibinaba ang sarili upang halikan siya.

I never really liked doing missionary unless I like the woman I am fucking but with my fiancée, it was the only position I wanted to do. Gusto kong kabisaduhin kung paano malukot ang kanyang mukha, kung paano niya kagatin ang kanyang labi, kung paano siya umungol habang sarap na sarap sa pag-ulos ko. God she was heaven.

Mahigpit niya akong niyakap at sinagot muli ang aking mga halik. We kissed for another minute until I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Can I go faster, love? This is killing me already.”

Hindi ko inasahan ang pagtawa niya. “Is that what you want all these minutes?”

“Yeah… You’ll make me cum fast if we do it this way.”

She bit her lip and nodded. “Do what you want. I’m all yours now, baby.”

I let out a low, animalistic groan as my phase changed its rhythm and began pounding her pussy hard and fast the moment she gave me permission. Para akong animal na matagal bago nakawala sa kulungan. It has been a while since I had sex, but this was by far the best because I am doing it with the woman I adore and love so much!

“Hmmph! Ahhh!”

“Oh, Eux! Ohhhh…” she purred, closing her eyes as I continued fucking her hot, yearning, and dripping pussy.

I thrust back and forth with vigor, taking her close to the brink of an orgasm. Humigpit ang kapit niya sa aking katawan. Her breathing became heavy. Napabaon ang ulo ko sa kanyang leeg. I sucked it, wala na sa sarili dahil sa nag-uumapaw na sarap sa pag-iisa ng aming mga katawan.

When I sensed that she was finally going to come, I slowed down, and then fucked her speedily when she was about to burst. What I did became too much for her, but I did not stop until her body began shaking as the rush of orgasm hit her like a train.

“Ohhh baby! Ohhh, Euxerre—ahhhh!”

I didn’t stop. Her legs were shaking uncontrollably. I pound her more.

“Ohhhh love! Oh gosh I’m—ohhh!” She continued crying out in passion.

I Instantly embraced and kissed her passionately as I rocked her back and forth. I was nearing the edge as well, pero hindi ko siya gustong mabitin. And I’m glad I did because if not, I wouldn’t know that she was a squirter.

Agad niyang natakpan ang bibig nang bumuhos ang napakaraming likido sa kanyang pagkababae. Seeing her lose her mind as her fluid gushed into me was the sexiest thing and definitely the best fuck I’ve ever experience. Tinangka niya pang takpan iyon pero agad ko lang kinuha ang kanyang kamay. I replaced it with my hand but not to stop the liquid from coming out but to give her more pleasure.

“I-I’m peeing! Ohhh I’m sorry!”

I just smirked and started rubbing her cunt. Hindi pa siya natatapos ay naipasok ko na ang dalawang gitnang daliri sa kanyang pagkababae at walang sabi iyong ginalaw para muli siyang tulungang labasan.

“It’s not peeing love… You just squirted…” I trailed off, now kissing her ears as I hold her body tight and fuck her with my fingers. “And it’s fucking sexy.”

“E-Eux…”

“I want you to cum again… Just let it all out. Squirt on my hand just enjoy it, baby.”

Nanghihina siyang tumango. Nahihiya pa rin kaya malugod ko siyang hinalikan ulit. I suck on her nipples while I kept fucking her with my fingers. Nang lumakas muli ang mga ungol niya ay ibinalik ko ang mga halik sa kanyang labi. I continued pleasuring her until she squirted again. Hindi niya sinasadyang makagat ang aking labi upang pigilan ang pagsigaw pero hindi naman ako nasaktan.

Her body was convulsing. Mas malala ang pangalawang beses na nilabasan siya. Seeing her weak because of pleasure was already a success to me. Hinang-hina na siya at wala na akong pakialam kung mabitin ako kaya hinayaan ko na munang magpahinga kami. I rolled on the other side of the bed and took her with me.

Wala akong ginawa kung hindi ang yakapin lang siya habang nasa ibabaw ko. She was silent, still panting and recovering from having an orgasm twice. I gave her time to rest. Okay lang din kung tapos na dahil nagawa ko na naman ang gusto niya. For sure she wouldn’t forget about her first time because I would never forget about it.

“Does it feel good, love?” I asked after minutes of silence.

Nahihiya siyang tumango ang mukha ay nakabaon lang sa aking leeg at yakap ako.

“I peed on your bed.”

“I told you it’s not just a simple pee. You have no idea how hot it is for me to know that you’re a squirter.”

“What do you mean? Hindi ba lahat gano’n? Am I the only one?”

She asked, worry was visible in her face. Inabot ko ang kanyang mukha na nakadungaw sa akin. Marahan akong umiling.

“Not all women can do that.”

“B-but… do you like it? Please be honest with me. I’m embarrassed.”

“I love it, baby. You don’t have to be embarrassed by it.”

She pursed her lips and kisses me, but before that kiss became wild again, she stopped when she remembered something.

“How about you? D-did you… cum?”

I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. You can take a bath and rest now. I’ll replace the bed so you can sleep here and spend the night if you want.”

Hindi siya sumagot. Hinayaan kong magpahinga na muna siya pero hindi ko inasahan ang mga salita niya sa muling pagtukod ng kanyang mga siko sa kama upang magkatitigan kaming muli.

“C-can I… ride you?”

“W-what?”

“I don’t think I can rest knowing that I failed to return the favor so please… Can I ride you, love? I’ll do my best to make you cum, too…”

Bago pa ako makasagot ay nakalipat na siya sa aking ibabaw. I watched her take my still-hard shaft and positioned herself on top of it.

“Please?” She asked again, wala na akong ginawa kung hindi ang mapatango at mapaungol na lang nang walang sabi na niyang upuan ang aking kahabaan.

Damn, that was clearly the best request I’ve ever granted my whole life.

CHAPTER 15

Chapter Fifteen

Wild Night

I never thought that one night could change everything again. Maayos na ulit kami ni Imara at nagkapatawaran na pero ngayon ay may panibago akong problema dahil hindi ko alam kung paano sasabihin sa mga kapatid kong tuloy na ulit ang kasal namin.

That was the thing about telling your problems to your family or anyone that dears to you. Alam kong mahihirapan ako dahil nabahiran na ang tiwala nila kay Imara. Kahit anong paliwanag ko ay mananatili siyang cheater sa mata ng mga kapatid ko. I can’t tell them that it was nothing just because I was her first. Kahit na iyon ang totoo ay hindi ko pwedeng i-broadcast ang bagay na ’yon. I am not that kind of man. I don’t think they’ll buy it, too. I guess I’ll just have to think of another solution before they hate her more.

“Are you okay? Masakit pa ba ang katawan mo?” I asked, now still concerned because she got sick when she went home that day.

Hindi lang kasi isang beses kaming nagniig. She gave me the wildest and the best night and before she went home the next day, we made love in the shower again. It was definitely one for the books. She was a fast learner and she didn’t have any idea how she pleased me so much. How I loved every single bit of that moment with her.

Damn, I’m getting hard just by thinking about it now.

“I’m fine. Hindi na ako nilalagnat.”

“Good. Please next time kapag masakit na o may nararamdaman ka na huwag na nating gawin.”

“Why? Hindi mo ba nagustohan? Please be honest with me.”

“No, I didn’t mean that. Gusto ko. God, gustong-gusto ko, but it’s your health that’s we should always prioritize.”

“You sure you liked it?” she asked again, not paying attention to what I am saying.

Paano ba naman. Bukod sa lagnat buong gabi ay dalawang araw ding sumakit ang katawan niya kaya sobrang nag-alala ako.

“I do, baby… I swear.”

“Baka napilitan ka lang. I know I am not an expert to that field, but just so you know, I did my best.”

I almost burst out laughing because of what she said. Kung nasa harapan ko lang siya ay baka napupog ko na siya ng halik… o baka sobra pa.

Damn baliw na baliw na yata talaga ako kay Imara.

“Do you really want to know what I think about everything that we did?”

“Yes.”

I let my back and head laid on my swivel chair. Malawak ang ngisi ko habang binabalikan ang mga maiinit na oras na kasama siya.

“You’re making me hard right now for forcing me to remember every single bit of that wild night.”

“Tell me now, Euxerre.” She demanded.

“I swear to God and the whole universe that you exceeded my expectation. I may have had a lot of experience about sex, but what happened between us made me wished that you were my first, too. Na sana sa ’yo ko lang naranasan lahat ng ’yon. You don’t have any idea how perfect you are to me. How much I value and love you. And it’s so different making love to the person you love. You took it to a whole new level and I might do something crazy right now if you don’t stop asking me about it because your voice alone is turning me on.”

“Hmmm, tell me how crazy?” She asked in her most innocent yet seductive voice.

Napamura ako at wala sa sariling naibaba na ang isang kamay patungo sa gitna ng aking mga hita dahil sumasakit na ’yon sa tigas.

Shit, is this really happening? Tinitigasan talaga ako kausap pa lang siya?

“Stop, baby… you’re making me crazy right now. I swear if you’re just right in front of me, the next thing that would come out of your mouth is your begging moan.”

“Oh yeah? And how will you do that, huh?”

Wala sa sariling nakagat ko na ang aking labi, tuluyan nang natalo ng kamunduhan. She kept talking on the other line while I was busy pulling down my zipper so I could take my aching shaft out. Hindi ko na kaya pang pigilan.

I was never this turned on with just talking to someone on the phone. I never did this my life. I once was addicted to porn, but it will take me loads of videos before I got to this state but Imara’s effect on me was too much. Boses pa lang niya ay nagsisimula na akong laruin ang sarili ko.

“Damn it baby, stop teasing me.”

“I’m not lying… I can’t stop thinking about it too and I don’t know what’s happening to me now. I feel like touching myself in inappropriate places just like how you touched me that night.”

That made me jack myself slowly and tightly. Now imagining Imara riding me again with her tight and dripping pussy.

Bumalik at nanatili ang utak ko sa mga oras na ’yon. Kung paanong malukot ang mukha niya sa tuwing ibinababa at taas ang sarili sa aking kahabaan. It was slow at first until she got the perfect rhythm of our bodies and rode me like she was a professional equestrian. It was so fucking hot. Ilang beses akong muntik nang labasan sa ilang minutong pag-indayog niya sa aking ibabaw. Her perfect boobs were bouncing. I sucked and caressed her pink and hard nipples. I kissed every part of her body and we made love until we both ran out of energy.

“Suck your thumb and put it on your nipples, baby…” utos ko, baliw na baliw na sa pagpapaligaya sa sarili habang kausap siya sa kabilang linya.

“Ahh…”

“Wet your thumb more and play your nipples with it. Imagine it’s my playful tongue that’s flicking and sucking on your nipples.”

“Oh my god it feels good… It feels so good, Eux…”

I guided her to explore her body more. I was getting closer to the edge each time she would moan on the other line. Naiisip ko pa lang ang hitsura niya ngayon na gaya ko ay nasa swivel chair lang din at pinapaligaya ang sarili ay parang lalabasan na ako.

“Now I want you to suck your fingers and slowly run your hands down your body,” I commanded, she was panting hard on the other line. I knew she was obeying me religiously. “Put your hand inside your panties and began rubbing yourself like how I would play with your clit. Spread your pussy lips and just continue rubbing your fingers on your clit, baby… fuck, just like that…”

“Ahhh…” she exhaled, nanginginig na ang boses.

Dumiin ang pagpikit ko’t mas bumilis pa ang paggalaw sa aking kamay. I couldn’t believe we became this wild. Isang gabi pa lang kaming nagsama pero hindi na namin matigil ang kamunduhan para sa isa’t isa. Everything about Imara was just a turn on for me. And I like how dominant and submissive she could be at the same time.

“You want to feel me now love?” I teased, habol na ang paghinga.

“Slowly insert your fingers inside. Imagine it’s my cock that’s being buried inside you. Ipasok mo ng dahan-dahan…”

“Ahhh… hmmmp!”

“Sige pa, baby… go deeper. Ibaon mo pa, love.”

Her moans became louder as she obey me to fuck herself with her playful and desperate fingers.

“You are beautiful, love… fuck, you’re already making me cum. Just continue fucking yourself… just continue fucking me, baby.” Hibang na hibang kong pagpapatuloy. Mariin nang nakapikit ang mga mata at mabilis na ang pagbayo sa sarili.

“Like this baby? Masarap ba? Please tell me how much you like it, Eux… ohhhh!” she demanded into my ear.

“I like that so much, keep going. Sige pa… fuck me more.” I groaned.

She continue exchanging lewd words and sentences with me, teasing me just how I wanted to. I could hear the sexy slams of her hand to her wet pussy as she fuck herself with her own fingers and imagining it was my cock who was fucking her.

“H-harder, baby…” she whispered.

I smirked. “What baby? what do you want harder?”

“Y-your cock… Fuck me harder with it, Eux… Please fuck me harder, love—ohhh!”

I can feel the heat flushed through my body as I heard those words. It feels so damn good and it tickles my ears!

I spit on my cock and pumped it more as I hear her breathing became shallower. Ilang beses akong napamura. Fuck wish I could see her face right now. I wish I was really fucking her. Fuck.

“Put your other hand down to your clit and play with it while you fuck yourself with the other.”

“Ohh Eux! Ohhh I’m coming! Ohhh!”

“Let me hear you cum, baby… Moan for me, love. Cum with me…”

I almost dropped my phone when the surge of intense orgasm rushed through me. I felt like my brain was exploding while jacking my dick as fast as I could to join her in zenith.

Good thing my other hand was still sane enough to grab some tissue from my table right in time for my explosion.

Imara’s shaking and moaning voice while cumming and probably squirting on the other line was too hot I could go for another round. Siguro kung nandito lang siya ay baka hindi na kami lumabas ng aking opisina.

I was never really a fan of making myself happy, but my body was too horny it needed a release. Para akong teenager ulit na first time nakatikim ng sex. At kahit nilabasan na, parang gustong-gusto ko pa. Hindi na sa phone na lang kung hindi siya na mismo.

“Damn baby that was so fucking hot…” I said after dropping the phone on my table and letting myself breath so my heart beat could be back to normal.

“I love you, Euxerre… I love you so much.” hinang-hina niyang sagot.

I responded the same words but then I couldn’t stop thinking about it the whole day so I decided to fetch her after her work. I was happy she immediately said yes. And later that night, we were making love again. Hotter, more passionate, and mind blowing I called the angels and all saints because of too much pleasure.

Scratch what I said about her health because damn… she was irresistible.

CHAPTER 16

Chapter Sixteen

Saved

“You’re back together?! How the hell did that happened kuya?!” Somerset blasted one day while storming inside my office.

Isang malalim na buntong-hininga kaagad ang kumawala sa aking mga labi pagkatapos ay nagmamadaling itinigil ang lahat ng ginagawa sapat bago siya makaupo sa aking harapan.

Alam ko namang hindi ko maitatago sa kanila ng matagal ang katotohanang maayos na kami ulit ni Imara at tuloy na ulit ang kasal pero hindi ko inasahang ngayon na ako magpapaliwanag kung bakit ako bumaliktad sa mga desisyon ko.

“Hello there, Somerset.”

“What happened kuya? Anong ginawa niya sa ’yo at bakit mukhang tuloy na ulit ang kasal? What lies did she told you para mabilog ang ulo mo?!”

“Enough, Soms. It’s my relationship and I get to decide what I want for it.”

“So that’s it? Gano’n na lang ’yon? Paano ang ginawa niya sa ’yo? Kakalimutan mo na lang bang nakipaghalikan siya sa ibang lalaki?!”

“I said stop! I don’t want to hear anything from it. Nag-usap at nagkaayos na kami ni Imara at tuloy na ulit ang kasal. Again, this is my relationship and I get to decide with it. Kung ano ang desisyon ko ay iyon ang masusunod.” mariin at tuloy-tuloy kong salita.

Ikinagulat niya ang pagtaas ng boses ko’t pagiging matigas sa desisyon pero imbes na makipagtalo pa at igiit na mali ako ay pinili na lang na umalis.

I feel bad for almost shouting at my sister, but I need them to see that I was firm with my decision.

I was worried about Somerset being mad at me but I really couldn’t do something about it. Wala na akong magawa kung hindi ang magalit na lang sa paningin niya para matapos na ang usapan.

“I’m sorry. Kasalanan ko kung bakit kayo magkaaway ngayon.” Imara said while we were at the elevator to her condo unit.

Apparently, she has been staying here since the day she got fed up with her parents setting her up with different men. It was a decent one bedroom condo unit with an amazing view of the city. She said she always love to live in a small space. Iyong tama lang sa kanya at madaling linisin dahil ayaw na ayaw niyang kumuha ng tao para doon. She likes to do things her way and by inspecting the place, she was really good at it. Malinis ang bawat sulok ng kanyang bahay. It was a spotless nordic style unit with a lot of really healthy and expensive plants to give the whole place more angst. Simple pero sobrang komportable. It made me like the idea of living small and simple.

I sat on her white couch while she go directly to her room to change. Sinabi kong o-order na lang ako ng pagkain para hindi na siya magluto. She agreed. Marami kasi kaming pag-uusapan ngayon tungkol sa aming kasal kaya para hindi na kami mag-abala pa ay o-order na lang ng pagkain.

I waited for her for five minutes. Sa kanyang paglabas ay nakasuot na siya ng puting silk dress na hapit sa kanyang katawan. It shows her curves and the immediate turn on I had from seeing her was too much. Agad akong umayos ng upo dahil pakiramdam ko ay makikita niya kaagad ang reaksiyon ng aking katawan partikular sa gitna ng aking mga hita.

We began talking about our wedding. We decided to get the best wedding planner in town as per my request but I valued what she said about the guest. Aniya ay kahit gagawin naming bongga ang kasal ay gusto niyang mga malalapit lang talaga ang iimbitahin namin. The wedding was still eight months away from now but it was just right to start planning it ahead of time.

We had loads of conversation while eating Chinese food. I told her it would be best to choose her gown now and all that. Agad ko namang pinatawagan ang wedding planner sa aking sekretarya at kahit gabi na ay malugod naman nitong tinanggap ang appointment na gusto ko.

“Tuloy na tuloy na talaga?” she asked smiling, but there was something in her question that made me uneasy.

I pulled her towards my body so I could hug her tighter.

“You still have eight months to back out future Mrs. Rozovsky.” I joked, natawa siya.

“No, baka ikaw.”

“Why would I do that?”

She looked at me. Her eyes were about to tell tales but she just shook her head to stop the words from coming out of her mouth.

“Just promise me that you’ll marry me no matter what happen, Eux…”

“Imara—”

“Please? I want to hear it.”

“I promise, baby.”

She forced a smile and nodded at me. Humigpit ang hawak ko sa kanyang kamay.

“Why do you need to tell me that when you know that I am already and looking forward to marrying you? Do you still have doubts about us?”

“No. Not that… I don’t know. It’s too early to tell. I mean, ilang buwan pa lang tayong magkakilala. With that span of time marami na rin ang nangyari. We already had ups and downs and I’m afraid that one day you’ll realize that I wasn’t the one that you need. Na parehas lang tayong pressured—”

“Are you pressured?”

“No, I love you and—”

“That’s enough for me,” I cut her off again. Halos mangilid ang mga luha niya sa aking sinabi. “I don’t think time really matters, Imara. I’ve been a long time relationship but she never made me feel this way. Walang oras o tagal ng panahon ang kayang magparamdam sa akin ng kung anong nararamdaman ko para sa ’yo ngayon kung hindi ikaw. And I don’t think I need more time to be sure that I want you to be my wife. Ikaw na ang gusto kong makasama habang buhay.”

I paused and wiped her tears. I also kissed her lips to stop her from overthinking. Ako rin naman ay may mga pag-aalala pero mas lamang ang excitement ko sa nalalapit naming kasal.

“I love you, Imara Loverly… and I can’t wait to marry you.”

“Promise me, Euxerre… I want you to promise me that you’ll marry me no matter what.”

“I’ll marry you… And I promise it with all my heart.”

Sa pagkakataong ’yon ay siya na ang humalik sa akin. I could feel her emotions everywhere so I responded to her kisses to make it stop.

We ended up making love again, but this time everything was different. Ramdam ko namang parehas kaming masaya at mahal namin ang isa’t isa pero sa hindi ko malamang dahilan ay hindi ko maiwasang mangamba. There was something in our conversation that was making me uneasy and it sucks because I can’t figure out what it is. Dama kong may iniisip siya pero pilit niyang ipinapakitang wala.

Sa mga sumunod naming pagkikita ay wala siyang ipinaramdam sa akin kung hindi saya. There were times that she was not in the mood, but I understood. Sanay na rin ako dahil minsan talaga ay sobra siya sa trabaho at laging pagod kaya iniintindi ko na lang palagi ang pag-iiba ng ugali niya.

“You didn’t wear it again?” I asked one night when we met at the Fire Palace to celebrate our first month of being officially together.

May sama pa rin ng loob ang mga kapatid ko pero wala namang nagawa ang mga ito. My parents are very happy about the on going preparations of our wedding. Dahil wala silang alam sa pag-aaway namin ni Imara ay sobrang excited lang sila. They already booked the designer to get their measurements for the gowns and suit that they will wear. Talagang kaunti na lang ay magiging handa na ang lahat.

“I’m sorry. Naiwan ko kasi sa bathroom sa sobrang pagmamadali at takot na ma-late na naman ngayong gabi. I know how important this is for our relationship. I promise next time hindi ko na kakalimutan.”

“Are you sure it fits perfectly? Gusto mo ba talaga ang design? We can buy other engagement ring that fits your taste if you want.”

“I like it. Talagang nakalimutan ko lang ulit ngayon, sorry na.”

Pinilit kong intindihin na lang. I prepared a very special night with her, but it seems like she was on the state where she was not in the mood so I had to adjust again to make her comfortable and happy.

“So, about the wedding. I already scheduled the fitting of my wedding dress. This week rin ang sa flower arrangements and all that.”

“Do you need me there?”

“No, I’m fine. Isa pa, bawal mong makita ang wedding gown ko.”

“Is that really true?”

She laughed and nodded. Natawa na lang din ako. We talked more about the preparations. She was more serious this time.

“Hmm, what’s your plan after that? I mean, where do we live after the wedding?”

It was a surprise to hear her asking about that. Minsan kasi gusto niya lang na mag-enjoy kami. She even said that she didn’t want to leave her condo unit and live big so I was a bit confused.

“You told me about the condo. You said you don’t want to leave your place for another year?”

Bumagal ang kanyang pagnguya sa aking sinabi. Hindi ko mapigilang magsalubong ng bahagya ang aking mga kilay. The uneasy feeling was now being intense and I’m hating myself for it. Wala namang ginagawa si Imara ngayon pero hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili kong mag-isip. As an honest person, I really don’t like it when she was being like this. It seems like she was a different person and it was impossible for us to connect. Naguguluhan ako.

“Oh, hindi naman ’yon pwede. I mean, I want that, but my parents would hate seeing me live in that small space without you. Alam kong hindi ka rin sanay at hindi pwedeng tumira doon so why don’t we change our plans about us living together as a married couple?”

“Where do you want to live then? Do you want us to move to El Nido and live in the villa?”

“Why would you want us to live there?” She said, almost mocking my suggestion.

Doon na ako natigil sa pagnguya. Nang makita niyang naging seryoso ako ay kumawala ang tawa niya.

“I’m sorry! I mean I love the idea, but our job is here. Nandito ang buhay natin. I’m my father’s successor and I don’t think living away from here is a smart choice.”

I was still confused about her attitude tonight. Hindi ko na sana gusto pang magsalita pero nang abutin niya ang kamay ko ay parang may kung ano pa ring lumambot sa aking puso. Naisip kong pagod lang ako buong araw kaya kung ano-ano ang naiisip ko.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to offend you but my parents… they are asking too many questions that I don’t know how to answer. Ayaw ko namang magkamali sa isasagot at mas lalong ayaw kong pangunahan ka. We need to talk and plan about this so they would finally stop bugging us.”

I held her hand properly as I nodded at her. I heave a sigh. Ipinilig ko ang ulo para matapos na ang mga naiisip kong hindi maganda sa gabing ito. I should just focus on what I was planned for us tonight. Iyon ang ginawa ko.

We talked about our set up after the marriage. I told her there was no problem with the house she wanted us to live in. Ang gusto niya ay manatili kami sa Manila at iyon ang gagawin ko. She was happy when I told her I will set up a meeting with the construction company that my family owned. Nakita kong napanatag siya sa aking mga sagot.

“How about the honeymoon? Where do you want to go?” I asked while now preparing for the massage.

“What do you have in mind?”

“How about Indonesia or Hawaii?”

“Hmm, nice, but how long do we need to be away?”

“Two weeks tops?”

“That’s a bit long. Can we do three days? I mean for sure marami tayong trabahong kailangang tapusin pagkatapos ng wedding so…”

Hindi ako nakasagot. Inayos ko ang bathrobe na suot at saka lumabas sa banyo. She was on a high table sipping some champagne. Gaya ko ay nakasuot na rin ng robe.

“That’s a little bit short don’t you think?”

She dismissed my question by lighting up a cigarette. Tuluyan ko nang naitikom ang aking bibig.

“Oh sorry!” Nagmamadali niyang idiniin sa ashtray ang yosing hawak nang sa pagpihit paharap sa akin ay nakita akong nasa harapan na niya.

“Since when did you learn how to smoke?”

“Since college? It’s not a regular thing I swear! I only smoke when I’m pressured and this week has been too much for me.”

I remained standing, still looking at her confused. Pinilit niyang ngumiti at inayos ang sarili bago ako lapitan. She smiled and tried to charm me by holding my hand again, but there was this urge to pull away. Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili ko. Good thing the masseuse came in to start the massage. Hindi na kami nag-usap. I don’t think I can talk more when this weird feeling was continuously eating me up.

We had champagne after the massage. May mga maliliit pa ring pag-uusap pero nang halikan na niya ako ay mas lalong sumidhi ang kakaibang nararamdaman ko. I still continued making out with her. She was a bit excited tonight. Siguro ay dahil sa champagne at wine na nainom kanina.

Sa paglakad ng aking mga labi sa kanyang katawan ay mas lalo siyang nag-iinit. I left kiss marks on her neck, she liked it. She wanted more. She was so hungry and horny for me, but there was still something inside me that was telling me to stop. Bilang lalaki ay sobrang nakadadala na ang init ng pinagsasaluhan naming mga halik pero nang tumunog ang telepono ko ay mabilis ko iyong nagawang putulin, walang pag-aalinlangan.

“Kuya please, I need you… please help me now.” Saryna begged on the other line that made me stopped everything that Imara and I was doing. And some weird reason, I feel like I saved by her call.

CHAPTER 17

Chapter Seventeen

Tell Me The Truth

I knew she was disappointed when I left, but there was nothing else she could do. My sister needed me. Kahit yata bumaha o bumagyo ay pupuntahan ko’t isasalba ang kapatid ko sa kung ano man.

I’m glad it was not that serious. Saryna just got drunk and got into a fight but it was already done when I got there. Hindi rin naman nasaktan ang kapatid ko kaya nakauwi rin kami kaagad.

We talked to my parents and it lasted for about thirty minutes. Napagalitan din ako ni daddy pero dahil hindi ko naman talaga kasalanan ay agad din akong pinaalis.

Nang tuluyang makapasok sa aking silid ay saka ko lang ulit naisip si Imara. Then the guilt started kicking in. I tried called her but she was not answering her phone. It was already past midnight so instead of continuously calling and hoping that she would answer, I just opted for a text.

Ako:

Sorry if I had to leave. My sister got into a fight and she needed me. I’m sorry.

I didn’t get a response. Dahil sa pagod ay nakatulugan ko na rin ’yon. I was still worried that Imara was mad at me but I woke up with a text from her saying it was okay. Napangiti kaagad ako. I guess she was in a much better mood today and that brighten up mine, too.

I was about to ask her for lunch but then I got swamped with work. Kaliwa’t kanan din ang mga meetings ko at mga appointment sa pag-aayos ng aming kasal kaya halos hindi ko siya nakausap buong araw. Mabuti na lang at naiintindihan niya naman ang trabaho ko. Sinabi niya ring medyo na-busy din siya kaya hindi na niya naisip ang oras.

We didn’t see each other the whole day. Hindi na rin kami nakapag-usap ng matagal sa aking pag-uwi at pagtawag sa kanya dahil parehas kaming pagod kaya ipinagpabukas na lang namin ang lahat.

I got to my office two hours early the next day to finish some of my work. Bago magtanghalian ay natapos na rin ang meeting ko sa mga agent na nakausap ko tungkol sa lupa at lokasyon ng ipatatayo kong bahay para sa amin ni Imara. I wanted the house to be finish before our wedding. Dahil biglaan din ang desisyon niyang ayusin namin ’yon ay kinailangan kong magmadali.

I sent Imara the available location for our house to be built along with the numbers of the best architects and engineers I know in the country. I waited for her response but I didn’t get one until dawn.

Imara:

Let’s talk and meet in my place. I’ll wait for you.

Nawala ang pagod ko sa nabasa. Dahil tapos naman na ang trabaho ko at alam kong marami pa kaming dapat pag-usapan lalo na sa nangyari kahapon ay doon kaagad ako dumiretso pagkatapos ng huli kong meeting.

I bought her flowers and gifts. Ako naman ang mas natuwa dahil sinalubong niya ako ng halik at mainit na yakap. I was surprised when she told me that she cooked for us tonight so there’s no need for me to buy us food outside.

“You really cooked this?” I asked after she presented the beef bourguignon and kale pasta. Sa amoy pa lang ay nagutom na ako kaagad!

“Yup! Para makatipid ka naman.”

That made me laugh. “Well that’s funny.”

She giggled. “I’m serious though. Kapag kasal na tayo, ayaw kong gumastos ka palagi sa akin. I want us to save and be wise with our money.”

“I’m sorry, but I think there’s no need for that. I’m already wise with my money that’s why I’m one of the youngest billionaire in this country. Just saying.”

Nailing at natawa lang ito.

“Isa pa, alam naman nating hindi ko kayang huwag kang gastusan. Money should be spent and I will spend my every dime for you, baby. Walang problema do’n so don’t ever worry about that.”

Shs pinched my cheeks and couldn’t resist to kiss my lips. Mabuti na lang at talagang nagutom din ako sa pagkaing inihain niya dahil kung hindi ay siya ang nauna kong kinain.

We talked about how our day went as we dig the food that she prepared for us. Kung nasaan na siya sa ginagawang preparasyon para sa aming kasal and vice versa.

“Don’t you like a rose gold themed wedding? Pink’s our favorite color and I’m totally fine with it.”

She blushes at that, but then she said she wanted us to have a neutral color. We then decided to go for an ivory themed wedding. Doon nag-focus ang pag-uusap namin sa halos isang oras. We exchange and complimented, each other’s ideas. Marami kaagad kaming natapos at napagkasunduan.

I told her my best man would be Damien since he was my closest cousin and friend. She told me hers will be her sister Lala.

“So this is why you don’t want to invite many people? It’s because you don’t really have a lot of friends?”

“Let’s just say that I got fed up with trusting people so I stopped friending strangers.”

“I can’t blame you.”

She just shook her head and smiled at that. Marami pa kaming naging usapan tungkol sa bagay na ’yon. I told her about my friends and how I wanted her to meet them. Pumayag naman siya.

“I’m happy you’re wearing the engangement ring tonight.” I said, now looking at it as she happily flaunt it tonight.

“Of course. I wear it all the time kaya please stop saying na papalitan ang design. I really love this one so enough with that topic. Gusto ko na ’tong napili mo.”

I swallowed hard and nodded.

“I remember your mom talking about your sisters not being with us during our first dinner together?”

Natigil siya sa pagnguya, sa unang pagkakatoan ay hindi nakapagsalita.

“How come we don’t talk about them?”

She chuckled and wiped her lips before answering me. “Wala namang dapat pag-usapan tungkol do’n.”

“Really?”

“Why? Is there something wrong? I mean, we can set up another gathering if you want to meet them. Wala namang problema. Gusto ko rin talagang makilala mo sila. It’s just that, they’re always busy. Kahit kami kasi halos hindi na rin magkita minsan.”

I nodded and asked her more about them. May pag-aalinlangan siya noong una pero nagkwento pa rin naman. She said she has two sisters, but her closest was her youngest sibling. She was still in senior high. Medyo malayo ang agwat ng edad nila kaya baby nila ito kung ituring.

“How about your other sister? What is she like?”

“O-oh… Lala? I mean, Imogen?”

I nodded. Naiiwas niya ang mga mata sa akin at bahagyang bumagal ang pagnguya.

“I don’t know… I really can’t tell a good story about her. She’s boring you know…”

“Huh…”

“And there’s nothing really interesting about that sister of mine. Hindi rin kami gano’n ka-close so let’s not talk about her.”

I wanted to ask more questions about that one, but I stopped myself from asking because I could see how hard it is for her to even talk about that. Mukhang totoo ang lahat ng sinasabi tungkol sa kapatid.

I let her changed the subject. Tinulungan ko siyang mag-ayos ng kinainan namin nang matapos kami. She was happy about it. And I love seeing her like this. Kaunting bagay ay masaya na kaagad. This is the side that I fell in love with… dito lang ako masaya.

We had wine while watching the city lights. Napag-usapan ulit namin ang tungkol sa bahay at ang dinner kasama na ang kanyang mga kapati. I told her how surprised I am that she wanted us to live big now. She continued apologizing for that.

“Are you sure you want us to live here in the city?” Tanong ko, ang mga mata ay hindi na nawala sa kanya.

“Where else do you have in mind? Ayaw mo ba rito?”

“Ikaw. It’s up to you, really. Kahit naman saan tayo pwede tayong makapunta kaagad dito anytime. We can use the private jet and helicopters if you wanted us to live far away from here.”

“But that would be expensive and lavish. I don’t think I’d want to spend our money for that kind of lifestyle.”

“Don’t be silly, baby…” agad ko siyang niyakap galing sa likuran. Sumiksik naman siya sa akin. “You will never worry about money once you become my wife. We have a lot of that even for countless generations to come, so please…”

“I know, Eux…” pumihit siya paharap sa akin.

Kinuha ko ang basong hawak niya at ibinalik sa lamesa. Inayos ko ang mga kamay sa kanyang bewang. She did the same. Maingat kong inayos ang takas ng buhok sa kanyang mukha. Hinawi ko maging ang nasa kanyang leeg. Marahas akong napalunok matapos mapatitig do’n.

“Tingin ko hindi ko pa rin kayang gumastos ng gano’n araw-araw. Besides, my father needs me here. I don’t think he’d allow me to live far away from here.”

“You don’t want to live in El Nido? In the Villa? Pwede rin naman kitang patayuan ng bahay na gusto mo do’n. Wherever you want. Kung saan ka mas komportable at magiging masaya.”

Bahagyang humigpit ang kapit niya sa aking balikat. Nagtangis ang aking bagang nang makita ang sobrang kagustuhan niya sa suhestiyon ko ngunit nananaig pa rin ang pagpipigil.

“How about our honeymoon? Where do you want us to go?”

Tuluyan na niyang iniwas sa akin ang mga mata. Humigpit ang kapit ko sa kanyang bewang pero hindi na siya nakasagot pa.

“Imara…”

She bravely forced herself to lock eyes with me again, but the sadness I saw in them finally lose all my patience.

“Mahal mo ba talaga ako?” Hindi ko na napigilang itanong, unti-unti nang nararamdaman ang galit sa kaibuturan ng aking puso.

Her jaw dropped at that. Mabilis na kumalat ang pag-aalala sa kanyang kabuuan.

“What kind of question is that? Of course I love you, Eux… I love you so much.”

Wala sa sariling nabitiwan ko na siya’t umatras ako upang hindi niya mahawakan. Dama ko ang kanyang panghihina sa biglaang pagbabago ng aking ekspresyon pero hindi ko na kaya pang pigilan ang lahat. I hate being bad at lying and even pretending because I just can’t fucking do it.

“Then why do you keep lying to me, Imara?”

“W-what are you talking about? Eux, I’m sorry pero gusto ko lang na ikaw ang mag-decide kung ilang araw mo gusto at kung saan. It’s all up to you, please don’t be mad.”

I scoffed sarcastically at that. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin siya natitinag. I can’t fucking believe it.

“Eux…”

Umatras ulit ako. Halos tumulo na ang mga luha niya sa biglaan kong pagbabago.

“Mahal mo ba talaga ako? I want you to tell me the truth and be honest with me for once, Imara.”

“Euxerre—”

“Or should I say Lala? Imogen Lauv? Your real name? Tama ba?”

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# CHAPTER 18

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Chapter Eighteen

God Is My Witness

She went pale hearing the words that I said and the name that I just called her. Tuluyan na siyang napasandal sa railings at nanghihinang napakapit do'n.

"W-what..."

"Am I right? Isn't that your real name?"

"E-Eux..."

"Stop with this bullshit, Imogen. I already know the truth."

Nag-unahan nang tumulo ang kanyang mga luha sa takot.

"H-how did you..."

"Your kiss marks. I put kiss marks on your neck yesterday, but it wasn't there now. Imposibleng sa isang araw lang ay tuluyang mawala ang mga markang 'yon. You've been inconsistent with your lies especially your twin and I'm dumb enough to let you both fool me for this long."

She shut her shaking lips. Wala nang masabi dahil huling-huli ko na ang lahat. Damn it, ngayon ay malinaw na malinaw na sa akin.

"Now what? Are you just going to cry?"

"Euxerre please—"

"It was you, right? Ikaw ang sumalba pagkatapos ng pagkikita namin ng kakambal mo. You pretended to be her so you could fixed things between us especially this stupid marriage, tama?"

"I-it's not that..."

"Stop fucking lying now and tell me the truth, Imogen! Fuck! Even that name is not familiar to me! Tangina, alin ka sa lahat ng mga oras na kasama kita? Alin doon ang totoo at pagpapanggap lang para maisalba ang kakambal mo?!"

Her tears began falling fast. Iniwas ko ang titig sa kanya dahil kahit na damang-dama ko ang galit, I still hate seeing her in that state. It added more pain in my heart, but I can't control my anger now. I needed answers and I will get it no matter what.

"I'm sorry... I didn't plan any of these at mas lalong hindi ko plinanong saktan at lokohin ka."

I scoffed sarcastically at that.

"I swear, Euxerre!" Hindi ko napigilan ang paghawak niya sa aking kamay. Nag-igting ang panga ko.

"Parang awa mo na maniwala ka sa 'kin. I don't want to hurt you. Tama kang ako ang sumalba sa kapatid ko pero hindi ko ginustong umabot tayo sa ganito... na minahal kita—"

"You don't hurt the people you love, Imogen."

"And I'm sorry if I'm hurting you now. I'm so sorry!"

Nanghihina niya akong nabitiwan. Napabalik na siya sa upuan at sandaling binigyan ang sarili ng pagkakataong makapag-ipon ng lakas. 

I walked to the edge of the balcony and grabbed the railings as hard as I could. Doon na lang gustong ibuhos ang lahat ng galit at pagkadismayang nararamdaman ngayon.

"I love you, Euxerre... and God know that it's true."

Nanatili akong nakayuko. Pinipigilan ang paglaglag ng mga luha dahil mas lalo akong nasasaktan sa kanyang mga salita.

I knew something was already wrong the moment I feel like being in a relationship with two different person. There were a lot of inconsistencies, but I still gave her the benefit of the doubt—until I couldn't lie to myself anymore. 

Dahil sa pagmamahal ko sa kanya ay nakalimutan ko ang ibang importanteng bagay. All I did was focused on her and the love that we have for each other. I didn't ask anyone to dig more about her life because the love that I had for her has already blinded me. 

Pagkatapos maisip ang naging takbo ng usapan namin noong gabi sa Fire Palace ay doon lang ako nagising. That was where I knew about her twin. Unang kita ko pa lang kanina sa litrato ni Imogen bago pumunta dito sa kanyang condo ay alam ko nang ito ang babaeng minahal ko at hindi ang kasama ko kahapon. Their resemblance was on point. They shared the same appearance, charm, voice, but then I was glad my heart could still tell the difference. Pagod na rin sigurong maging tanga sa harapan ng dalawang babae matapos ang ilang buwang kalokohan.

I kept mum about it seeing her tonight. I was still hoping I was just being paranoid, but my eyes are awoke now. Hindi lang sa kiss marks ko napatunayan 'yon kung hindi pati na rin sa singsing at sa mga plano niya para sa kasal naming dalawa. 

"I love you," she repeated, ngayon ay nakatayo na sa aking gilid at ang boses ay nagmamakaawa. "Totoong mahal kita kahit na wala 'yon sa plano. I never intended to love you. Pumayag ako sa gusto ng kapatid ko dahil kailangan ko ng pahinga. I know you are not as bad as she told me and you proved me that the day we met. At kahit hindi niya ako alukin ulit na ayusin ang problema niya ay ginawa ko dahil una pa lang ay gusto na kita,"

My jaw clenched more when I felt her hand now touching my arm again. 

"Euxerre please... hindi kita niloko at hindi kita gusto pang lokohin pero wala akong choice."

"You always have a choice Imogen, but you still choose to fool me." I said bitterly. 

Humigpit ang kapit niya sa aking braso. Unti-unti ay nararamdaman ko na ang paghila niya sa akin upang ibaling ko ang paningin sa kanya. I did not let her win.

"Please... look at me, Eux."

"I'm going home—"

"No... I can't let you go home without us talking and fixing this."

A sarcastic laughed escape my lips. Mas lalong nagpintig ang aking tainga sa sinabi niya kaya marahas kong nahawi ang kanyang kamay pagkatapos ay mabilis na muling lumayo.

"And what do you expect, huh? Na patawarin kaagad kita? Na magbulag-bulagan ulit?"

"I love you Soronious... mahal na mahal kita at patuloy kitang mamahalin kahit na hindi pwede. Kahit na para ka kay Imara—"

"I'm not for someone I don't like! Now that you mentioned that, pwedeng ikaw na rin ang magsabi sa kakambal mong tapos na ang palabas."

Marahas kong naitikom ang aking bibig at hindi nakaalis nang walang sabi siyang lumuhod sa aking harapan. I felt my heart dropped at that. Mas lalong lumakas ang kanyang pagluha na halos hindi na siya makahinga.

"Get up. Your tears will not save you this time, Imogen." Matigas ko pa ring sabi kahit na hindi ko na rin maintindihan ang nararamdaman ko. My heart was totally breaking for the both of us. 

"Please listen to me, Euxerre. Please give me a chance I'm begging you..."

"I said get up!"

Humigpit lang ang yakap niya sa aking mga binti. As much as I wanted to rip her away from me, I can't. Alam kong kapag inalis ko siya palayo sa katawan ko ay masasaktan ko siya. I am hurt, but I couldn't hurt her physically just because of that. 

Nanatili akong nakatayo sa kanyang harapan. Umaasang sundin niya na lang ako pero mas lalo lang niya akong binigyan ng rason upang manatili. 

"I'm sorry for hurting you, Euxerre... I just want to help Imara at first, but then I fell in love with you. Everything that I said and did was real. Mahal kita at natakot lang akong magpakatotoo dahil hindi pa ako handa. I know I'm going to hurt you regardless if I tell you the truth o not. Hindi lang ikaw kung hindi ang kapatid ko maging ang sarili ko kaya naduwag ako,

"Maniwala ka ilang beses ko na ring sinubukang sabihin sa 'yo ang totoo pero hindi ko magawa. Sa tuwing alam kong siya ang kasama mo ay sobra akong nasasaktan. I never wanted this, you know. Gusto ko na lang na tumakas sa lahat kasama ka. Gusto ko na lang sundin ang nararamdaman ko para sa 'yo pero hindi pwede... Euxerre, mahal kita... m-mahal na mahal kita maniwala k-ka..."

Her speech made me close my eyes. Dama kong tumulo na rin ang mga luha ko kaya agad kong naidiin ang aking mga daliri doon matapos mapatingala.

She crawled up to get back to her feet. Sa kanyang pagtayo ay walang sabi niya akong agad na niyakap nang mahigpit.

"I love you... I love you so much and I'm sorry... maiintindihan ko kung hindi mo ako paniniwalaan. I'll respect your decision, but please know that everything that happened between us was true... My love for you is true..."

I swallowed the bile on my throat when her body body began shaking. Patuloy pa rin sa malalim na pag-iyak.

"I know you feel the same and I want to thank you for loving me..."

She stopped hugging me. Parang ako naman ang nanghina sa kanyang paglayo matapos magtagpo ang aming mga matang parehas nang lumuluha. 

"Spending every minute with you has been the happiest moments of my life and God is my witness..." she forced her shaking lips to smile. "But I guess I need to stop dreaming now and let you end this. Ako nang bahalang magpaliwanag kay Imara."

"Or maybe I can? What if sabihin ko na lang sa lahat para hindi ka na mahirapan pa?"

"Please, Eux... parusahan mo na lang ako huwag mo lang ipahiya ang kapatid ko. Please don't let this be public."

"Hanggang ngayon ang kapatid mo pa rin ang iniisip mo? What about me, Imogen? Paano 'yung panggagago n'yong dalawa sa 'kin?"

"Hindi kita ginago! Oo mali kong hindi ko sinabi sa 'yo ang totoo tungkol kay Imara pero hindi ako nagkunwari sa lahat ng ipinakita ko sa 'yo!"

"And I should thank you for that? Gano'n ba, huh? Do you want me to thank you for now being honest with me?"

Hindi na siya nakapagsalita. She bit her lip but she turned her back on me when she couldn't take it anymore. Nanghihina niyang naitakip ang mga kamay sa kanyang mukha at doon muling napahagulgol.

There was a part of me that wanted to pull her towards me. Gustong umintindi, gustong magpatawad, pero mas matindi pa rin ang kagustuhan kong maging matigas at tapusin na lang ang lahat. 

"My love for you wouldn't save you this time, Imogen. This is too much and I'm hurt... I'm fucking hurt." gumaralgal na ang boses ko sa huling sinabi.

Pinilit niyang muli akong harapin pagkatapos ng halos isang minutong parehas naming pananahimik.

"I can't love you, Euxerre... What me and my sister did was the only way that I can be with you and I'm such a hypocrite for living in that dream... Baliw akong ipinagpatuloy ko kahit na alam kong parehas tayong masasaktan lang."

"Stop fucking making excuses!"

"I'm not!"

"Then why the hell are you saying that you can't love me?! That we can't be together?!"

"Because I'm already engage with someone else! I'm about to get married too, Euxerre!" she shouted so loud that I could hear my totally heart breaking.

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