Info

*** PLEASE NOTE ****

This will be a Mpreg story. If this is not for you then please do not read. This story will be placed in a universe where some males can have both male parts and a uterus. A friendly reminder to always check tags before starting a fic.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this story. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No copyright infringement is intended.

I am NOT a professional writer and only write for fun. Please do not critize for any spelling mistakes or things that are not accurate. This is only all for fun.

I will write from 3rd person POV 

I also want to note that people named  in the story are for character purposes only. The storyline is not real.

Please remember to always like a chapter and leave plenty of comments. It keeps me motivated to write.

Prologue

A/N

Hi guys!

Welcome to my new fic.

Here is the prologue.

Before I start I thought I would share these pictures with you to give an insight into how I pictured the characters for this story.

Harry . 26 years old.

Lexi. 29. Harry’s wife.

Louis. 27.

Elly. 24. - Louis’ wife.

3RD PERSON POV

Louis Tomlinson has been Harry’s best friend for the last 5 years. A best friend is someone who is always there for you, someone who you can always without a doubt rely on. You tend to confide in each other about anything and everything ranging from your relationships to family problems to even the stress that your job may bring you.

You spend a large portion of time with them, and undeniably you feel 100 % yourself and comfortable whenever you are in each other’s company. You trust them, you love them, and you may, without sounding too dramatic possibly even die for them. That’s what best friends are for right?

Once you fall for a best friend, there’s no telling what may happen. What if they feel the same? What if they don’t? Then, there’s the danger of creating that unwelcome awkwardness between the pair of you, with the possibility of losing your best friend either way.

Making matters more complicated, let’s say you are now realising that when you look at your best friend, your heart is filling with feelings that are no longer just platonic. You can’t and you will not address it or act on it in any way shape or form because there are 2 major factors that simply just won’t allow you too.

1. What happens when you know you are falling in love but at the same time it feels totally and utterly like the worst thing that could ever happen to you because it just so happens, that your best friend is also another man. 2. More importantly if it could seem any worse, what else can you do when both these men are already married…..to women.

Harry is having a hard time with all these new feelings and to top it off, his wife Lexi is really getting on his nerves. You see Lexi is a lawyer and she spends a lot of her time at work, leaving her very tired and irritable when she arrives home.

Harry is starting to question all his life decisions and Lexi is definitely one of them. As he grows tired of living the same boring routine day in and day out, he finds himself dreaming about what life would look like with someone else. That someone else happens to be his wife’s best friend’s husband.

Their marriage wasn’t always so glum. Harry was genuinely in love with Lexi for many years. They were very young when they got married at only 18 years of age after only dating for 6 months prior. Everyone including Harry’s family all tried to warn him about committing to someone so quickly but Harry was in love at the time and was therefore blinded by the advice and now here he stands regretting that silly decision.

Louis loves his Fashion designer/model wife Elly. El as she likes to be called is nothing but the doting wife. Whenever Louis needs her she’s there. El could pretty much be the definition of a perfect wife. She’s beautiful, she’s kind but there’s only one thing Louis doesn’t support with El and that is her love for and tendency to overspend money. That is the only problem the pair ever find themselves fighting about.

Louis is a professional writer and is currently signed with an agent. He already has 3 published books and his only 27. His imagination is brought to life with his talented love of fiction and horror stories.

The best thing about his career is being able to stay and work from home, which suits Louis as he prefers the comfort of his own house to that of being out somewhere socialising.

Louis loves Harry …as a best friend of course. The men can not go one day without seeing or talking to each other, it’s been like that for years.

They both depend on each other for almost everything and sometimes their wives find it rather amusing just how flirty and funny and dependant they are of each other. To Lexi and Elly it’s all just banter. Most of their friends and family adore their ’ bromance’ as most like to call it.

Harry leans on Louis and Louis leans on Harry. They both need that support from each other in order to continue their everyday lives happily but with both boys alone when the wives are away will Harry let Louis in on his secret? The secret about his feelings for him surely will shock an oblivious Louis……or does Louis already know about Harry’s feelings because maybe deep down he feels them too????

This is Harry’s current predicament. So let’s maybe rewind a little and see how exactly Harry ended up here in the very first place……………

A/N

So that’s the prologue.

What are everyone’s thoughts?

Who’s ready for the first official chapter?

As always please remember

to

vote, comment and share it keeps me motivated. 😘

Chapter 1 - Drinks

A/N Trigger warning. Talk of miscarriage. Please if this is a trigger for you, read at your own risk.

3RD PERSON - POV

Watching his wife lie in bed curled up crying, should make Harry feel more saddened over his wife’s miscarriage. He knows he should have cried by now but he hasn’t. Consoling his wife is something he should try and do a little more to help comfort her, but he doesn’t seem to be able to bring himself to do it.

Lexi has wanted a baby for years hounding Harry effortlessly every chance she got, not taking in his lack of enthusiasm and effort. Two months ago her wish was finally granted when she returned a positive home pregnancy test. Harry, his heart ached a little at the newfound news.

Having a baby was something he had always wanted ever since he could remember, however having a child should be with someone you really love and cherish. Someone who when you just look at them, your mind and body automatically feels that connection, your heart consuming all aspects of them as all your senses realise your soul simply belongs to them. Unfortunately, he just didn’t feel that way with his wife, not anymore at least.

He hadn’t felt that way in a long time and Harry felt he was stuck in his marriage, a marriage that now just felt boring, repetitive, loveless and lonely.

He sucks in a deep breath throwing his keys onto the dressing table as he crosses the room to sit down beside her on their bed. Not knowing what exactly to say he decides to just put his hand on her back rubbing her gently hoping she will stop sobbing.

“ Lexi I’m sorry I don’t- “

“ what Harry? What are you sorry for huh? The fact you never even got excited when I was pregnant? Or maybe you are finally sorry for when you brought me back from the hospital after I lost our baby, only to leave me to go straight back to work. You left me to fall apart and have a breakdown all on my own!!! Or are you sorry for being happy about this miscarriage because you know what Harry, I haven’t seen any type of emotion out of you. Do you even fucking care? “

Lexi sits up reaching to the bedside table, grabbing a tissue to blow her nose. It does actually hurt Harry to see her cry, it’s not like he hates her or anything. He has in a simpler term just fallen out of love with her.

Looking around he notices there are tissues everywhere and their one and only ultrasound picture is being held tightly by the grip of her hand.

Harry doesn’t want to reply because there’s a tiny bit of truth to what she’s saying and it’s not that he isn’t hurting because he is, but it’s a different type of pain to what she’s currently feeling. He doesn’t know how to explain that to her or even if he wants to at this stage because she’s clearly too upset to have a conversation without it turning into an argument.

Looking down at his phone as it dings he sees an incoming text message. He replies instantly before standing up and walking to his cupboard. He searches for a moment as he decides on what to wear. It doesn’t take long before he is pulling off his existing shirt and replacing it with a clean one.

“ who was that and what are you doing?“ Lexi snaps glaring at him.

“ It was Louis, we are going to go have a few drinks, he needs to talk to me.“

As Harry drenches himself with cologne he hears Lexi mumble.

“ Of course it was.“

He turns his head quickly in her direction.

“ What the fuck was that suppose to mean?“

“ You don’t think I need you right now, that maybe I need to talk to you too Harry. No … you don’t…. Louis will come first, he always does. “

This comment throws Harry off. Lexi has never been jealous of Louis or our tight friendship before, other women yes but never of his long-time friend.

“ Don’t wait up “

He can hear her start crying again as he makes his way down the stairs. He had a long day at work and coming home to Lexi is getting all too much for Harry to handle, so a beer or two tonight would go down easy.

Harry exits the house and waits for Louis to meet him at Louis’s front gate. There’s a pub only a few minutes down the road so naturally, the men had decided they were going to walk there.

When Louis finally greets Harry he already knows Harry is not in the best of moods. He knows him too well, he knew the moment he saw the way he was rocking staring at the ground. His eyebrows burrowed as though he was in deep thought. So Louis did what he does best, he makes Harry smile.

“ Hey, babycakes! I was a little unprepared for how hot you and the weather were going to be tonight“

Like always, Harry’s face grins from ear to ear.

“ Flattery won’t get you everywhere Lou but… it will get you into my pants“

The pair both laugh as they begin walking side by side along the street.

“ I’m glad we can have a casual flirty friendship without either of us getting the wrong idea. “ Louis mentions as he elbow bumps Harry’s arm.

“ So how’s life over at your house Haz, How’s Lexi doing now, is she ok? Are you guys getting along any better? “ Louis asks with a hint of hopefulness.

Harry had already informed Louis last week about their loss and his ongoing fights with his wife, but not going into too much detail.

Talking to Louis about his problems was easy. Lou listened to him intently and he certainly didn’t judge his feelings or actions, and more importantly, Lou somehow on every occasion managed to lift his spirits and make him feel better about himself and all that was going on with his life.

Louis was somewhat of a stress relief for Harry. His presence alone was enough to calm his unwanted moods. Louis thought the same about Harry and that was why the pair found themselves making sure to spend time with each other every single day.

“ Erm…well…you know what, Let’s get the drinks in first shall we before we start on all the soppy shit?“

It doesn’t take long to reach our destination. The pub is pretty busy which is nothing unusual for a Friday night. Approaching the bar Louis leans into Harry’s ear as the noise of many men chatting loudly makes it hard to talk.

“ My shout H, what do you fancy tonight?“

Knowing that he hasn’t had a drink yet and is certainly 100 % sober Harry doesn’t understand why out of the blue the little voice inside his head replied with the word ‘YOU’.

Glad that he knew Louis couldn’t hear that, he clears his throat as he tries to awkwardly re-arrange himself on the bar stool.

“ Something strong “ Harry says as Louis smirks in return.

A lot of shots have been taken and a couple of hours later both men have clearly had way too much to drink. It was apparent in the way Harry was stumbling as he made his way to the toilets and how Louis was burping uncontrollably but neither one of them mentioned or complained to each about it, because to them, that was them being comfortable in their own little bubble of happiness.

“ As much as I adore your company and all the laughs tonight Harold, I do really need to talk to you about Elly.“

Louis says as he unzips his jeans preparing to use the urinal. Harry who is already peeing turns his body to give Lou his full attention, not realising he has now accidentally urinated all over Louis’s shoe.

“ oops“ Harry giggles as Louis laughs hard shaking his foot and reaching for some paper towel.

“ Come on, let’s go get another round and have a chat, it’s time we faced our problems babe“

Louis tugs Harry’s arm guiding him out the door, holding tightly as he realises Harry is having trouble standing up alone.

The place is starting to quiet down. It’s nearing midnight as Louis skulls the remainder of his beer. Harry watches Louis wink at him as he finally starts their first serious conversation of the night.

“ So Harry. What was with the long face when we left home?“

Harry shakes his head no.

“ Good try buddy but You wanted to talk about Elly remember so what’s up? Spill it “

Louis stares at the table quietly speaking, low enough that Harry had to ask him to repeat it.

“ I said……I think Elly is cheating“

Harry frowns confused, shaking his head.

“ Nope, there’s no way Lou, she literally worships you. Why would you think that ?“

Sighing as he reaches over to steal Harry’s vodka, he runs his hand over his mouth as he pulls his seat closer to Harry.

“It’s just that there are too many things not adding up lately. She’s working late all the time, which makes no sense…… like….. what’s a model doing at 2 am exactly Harry.”

Louis’s whole attitude has swiftly changed as his frustration becomes evident.

“ I mean there’s photo shoots and editing and promotion and god knows what other stuff so I’m sure -“

Louis interrupts him now eager to voice all his concerns.

“ Then there’s her ‘Assistant’ Tom who is calling, Texting all hours of the night and then …wait for it….took her out to dinner the other night after picking her up from our house. Our house Harry!!! She tried playing it off as a work dinner but something felt off Haz and it’s got me worried, you know how much she means to me“

Harry all of a sudden feels a little more sober at the thought of remembering how much Louis loves Elly. In a way his kind of envious of their relationship, he wishes he loved Lexi the same way.

“ I’m sure you are just paranoid Lou. I promise you, she wouldn’t do anything to compromise losing you, I know I wouldn’t. “ Harry says mumbling the last part.

It takes Harry a few seconds to realise what he has said as he flicks his worried eyes to Lou who fortunately doesn’t seem to have heard it, or if he did he isn’t showing it.

“ yeah, your right……She wouldn’t do it. I can’t believe I even suggested it. I’ve had a shitty day. I didn’t sleep too well last night and on top of that I couldn’t focus on my novel today and the stress is probably just getting to me “

Harry is starting to overthink and panic because tonight, as he sits watching Louis bat his long eyelashes while he stares into his eyes, he starts to have thoughts and unexpected feelings arise in his stomach that he never imagined he would.

Louis over the years has given him many things before, but butterflies were never one of them. Harry ignores it all instead blaming the drinks, it’s gotta be the alcohol. Yep, definitely the alcohol he convinces himself.

“ The only things to cure a bad day my friend is straight vodka and rough sex and preferably in that order“ Louis laughs as he returns to the bar grabbing more pints.

Upon returning Louis leans across patting Harry’s thigh.

“ So your turn, what’s happening in your household?“

Truthfully Harry doesn’t know where to begin. He doesn’t know how or what to say to describe the way he feels. He does know he isn’t happy anymore and that life with Lexi is proving to become too difficult. Deciding to just bite the bullet Harry runs his hands through his hair as he throws both hands up in the air in defeat.

“ I want a divorce“

Chapter 2 - Therapy and Shopping

‘You can either burn in love or burn for love, either way, you cannot escape the fire.’

Those were Louis’s words that haven’t been able to escape Harry’s thoughts since last night.

In Harry’s mind, he had already made up his decision about his future with Lexi. Then Louis had to come along and be the man with the convincing advice about how he should at least try a little bit harder before giving up his marriage.

Louis has always had a way with words and without realising it, he has always held a strong power over persuading Harry. It’s not something Louis does deliberately or is even aware of because to Harry, Louis only needs to simply look at him and smile and he will surrender and agree to anything. It’s always been that way ever since they met but it’s only been recently that Harry has actually realized just how much influence Louis really does hold over him.

That is how he now finds himself and Lexi sitting in the waiting room waiting to see a couples therapist and it’s making Harry anxious.

For the last 17 minutes, he has stared at the same poster that is pinned to the wall opposite his seat. Reading it over and over and analysing it again and again and it’s starting to make him feel sick.

‘There’s no challenge strong enough to destroy your marriage as long as you are both willing to stop fighting against each other and start fighting for each other’

“ Mr and Mrs Styles“ The older lady calls out pushing her small rounded glasses back further onto her nose.

Wiping his sweaty hands along his trousers as he stands, he smiles at the woman as he looks to Lexi who simply shoves past him in a huff eager to enter the room they are being directed to. Harry follows into the room and with every step he takes he is heavily reminded how much of a bad decision this really was.

The therapist who I now know is named Julie, dives into an in-depth speech regarding the Pros and Cons of counselling along with all today’s current marriage statistics and Harry doesn’t take very long to completely zone out. He is aware Julie is talking, he can hear her, and he knows all too well that he should be listening, but examining the office interior appears way more pleasing than the prospect of saving his marriage. In his defence, his only present here right now because Louis had suggested it.

Julie sits with her leg crossed over her knee, in her beige u-shaped chair, her notepad and pen sitting in her lap. The Walls are all a light yellow, besides the one and only exposed brick one which supports the small window.

Looking around it’s totally cliqued. There’s a lamp in one corner and what appears to be a large artificial plant in the other. Julie’s therapy credentials and certificates are framed and hung proudly around the walls.

Leaning forward to grab one of the cups of water provided on the coffee table, it seems Julie has already sensed Harry’s lack of willingness to be there. He hasn’t noticed his leg bobbing up and down nervously as his too busy watching his finger running back and forth along the brown leather armrest of the lounge.

“ Harry, what do you think about that? “

He can’t help but jump at the sudden mention of his name. He has no idea what Julie is talking about. He looks at his watch. 7.37 pm. Thirty-seven minutes he has not heard a single word. Every now and then he would hum a simple “ Mmmhmm“ trying to acknowledge he was engaging into the conversation and it clearly was working up until now. He slightly panics as he carefully answers

“ Ah yeah, that’s good?“

Harry is praying he has given somewhat of a decent appropriate answer to the question he has no idea of what was spoken. Lexi looks content with a small smile, so he guesses he must have said something right….yeah?

“ You will?“ Lexi asks Harry re-affirming his answer.

Julie leans across trying to hand him a piece of paper.

“ Here’s the little questionnaire I discussed earlier on. Please make sure you both fill it out and have it ready before next week’s session“.

Harry folds his paper up as small as he can without looking at it, placing it into his back pocket as Lexi raises to her feet.

“Thank you, Julie, it’s been a pleasure meeting with you, we will see you next week.”

Harry copies suit extending out his arm to shake her hand without saying a word.

The ride home is fairly quiet. They are only minutes away from their ’ humble abode’ Before Lexi suddenly decides to break the silent awkwardness.

“ I’m really surprised but extremely grateful that you agreed to think about trying for another baby. I know you weren’t 100% on the idea the first time around but I appreciate how you understand how much having another baby means to me“

“ Wait what!?!“ Harry snaps rather loudly making Lexi jump at the sudden change of tone.

Fuckkk…….

Lucky for them Harry was held up at a red light intersection otherwise, he is surely confident he would have totally crashed the car at her revealing words.

Pulling into their driveway, Harry is the first to leave the vehicle making sure to slam his door on the way out. Lexi is left sitting in the car, tears falling slowly as she continues to wonder why it is that her husband has all of a sudden become so upset and angry.

Watching Harry search around the inside of their linen cupboard as she enters the house, she can’t help but seek answers.

“ Harry, what is the matter?“

Of course angry as he is and wanting to prove he’s not in the mood, he decides to just ignore her. Finally, he pushes the linen cupboard door harshly as he finds the blanket he was looking for and begins walking towards the guest room.

“ Harry for god’s sake, just fucking talk to me. “

Lexi knows she hasn’t been the best of wives over the years. Harry had mentioned her constant attitude several times and she knows her busy job makes her tired and snappy a lot. Since she was a kid, she has always been a handful. Always strong-willed and stubborn and being the bossy type, Harry had consistently looked past it all.

Now Lexi fears Harry is at breaking point, that he has had enough. Her mind is filling with all sorts of assumptions and it’s driving her crazy. There is no way she wants to lose Harry. He is the love of her life. Lexi has loved Harry from the very beginning.

Harry doesn’t stop instead walking faster to escape her. Inside the guest room, he plops himself backwards onto the bed where he lays still for a few silent moments trying to gather his thoughts.

He contemplates whether or not to go to sleep but seeing it’s now only 8.30 pm he decides against it. He reaches back into his pocket pulling out the paper Julie had given him, scanning over the questions.

Harry searches around the room for a pen, pulling open the bedside drawer finally finding a lead pencil. Seeing as thou he has free time on his hands as there is no TV or books or remotely anything to keep himself entertained in there, he guesses now is the perfect time to just complete this stupid quiz and have it over and done with.

Harry starts filling in the answers and is quite surprised at how quickly he finishes. He smiles as he feels fairly chuffed with himself that he completed this ’ homework’ without any hassle….. until he reads over the answers.

Harry is stunned at what he sees. He is mortified to put it more frankly. He doesn’t want to admit what he is reading. He goes over some of the answers again.

Q1. What do you find most attractive about your spouse’s face? A- Definitely the Eyes Q2. How do you describe your spouse’s smile? A- Reminds me of the sun shining brightly. Genuine and radiating like a beautiful sunflower. Q3. How do you feel when in your spouse’s presence? A- Happy, contented, comfortable, it feels like I’m home.

Harry keeps reading and the more he does the more his heart races. He scrunches up the paper throwing it across the room. Pacing back and forth he can’t help but try and piece together how his feelings towards another has changed. Harry comes up with no explanations as to why all his answers of how he felt, were not about his wife but instead that of his best mate Louis.

Harry was confused and scared, absolutely fucking scared. He feels it deep within, he knows his falling for his best friend and he has no clue what the hell he is going to do about it.

Stressed… that’s what he is. He leaves the house entering his backyard. His mind is in overdrive. He doesn’t want to think about Louis he just needs some sort of sign that someone is there for him and that everything will be ok because sometimes Harry, he forgets that his only human and that it’s perfectly ok to have a breakdown when needed every now and then. He needs to relax, that’s what he needs.

---

Louis has spent the majority of the evening preparing dinner as he does most nights. He doesn’t mind, even though he can’t cook if his life depended on it. He once again burnt the lasagne but he doesn’t care because he knows Elly will only eat a bit of the healthy green salad anyway.

Elly had promised to be home by 7 pm so they could at least eat one proper meal together for the day. That has always been a rule of theirs. Most mornings Elly is already up showered eaten and gone by the time Louis rolls out of bed. That’s Louis’s biggest perk about working from home, he has the freedom to sleep in as much as he desires, which is perfect for Louis who most definitely is not a morning person at all.

Dining with each other for dinner is the only available time of the day when the two can possibly spend some quality time. Lately, over the last few weeks, Elly hasn’t bothered returning home until close to midnight every night. Louis has had enough and has demanded she be home tonight in time for their dinner.

He can’t help but keep flicking his eyes to the clock on the wall 8.15 pm and still no word from her. He has all intentions of calling to suss out her whereabouts as he fishes out his phone from his pocket when he all of sudden hears the front door open and close.

The familiar sound of her high heels are echoing throughout the hallway. As she approaches closer even as upset as he is he already knows he will forgive her for working late because he loves her dearly….that is until he notices her arms are filled with shopping bags. His eyes are drawn to the labels: Gucci, Chanel, Dior, and Louis Vuitton.

Louis stands up from the table shaking his head in disgust.

“ Hey baby, sorry I’m a little late I stopped off quickly for a spot of shopping.“

Elly hasn’t noticed how upset Louis appears until she walks over to kiss his cheek.

“ Babe, are you ok?“

Louis starts to wonder whether his ears are not functioning properly as he can swear he thought he heard her asking if he was ok. Like does she have no idea why his a tad angry?

“ NO El, I’m not ok…!“

Elly freezes hugely surprised at the tone he is using with her. They don’t fight often but when they do, it’s similar to a ticking time bomb. All the held up frustration slowly building up over the weeks, rises to the surface and finally explodes.

“ So you missed our dinner for shopping fucking shopping El!! Here I was thinking you were just working late AGAIN but no, you decided to waste what appears to be a large amount of money on what? clothes???!!!! “

Elly isn’t the confrontational type. Knowing how angry Louis gets when he occasionally snaps, she has learnt to sit back, listen and give him space and tonight was no different.

“ I’m sorry Louis I really am. I’m not going to lie I forgot about our dinner and these bags I- “

Louis cuts her off mid-sentence.

“ I really don’t want to hear it anymore. We have had this same discussion many times before. You can’t keep spending so much bloody money. Do you think it grows on trees El, you don’t make a fortune and my novel payouts will eventually run out especially if you keep buying all this fucking crap!!!! “

El is clearly upset as she pulls out a brochure from her handbag placing it down on the kitchen table.

“ So I guess going on this holiday to New York is off the cards then?“

Surely she isn’t serious? El picks up her handbag her head lowered to the ground.

“ You were the one wanting more time together so I thought maybe we could take a little time away just you and I…..Don’t worry Louis I won’t spend no more of your dam money ok“

As he watches his wife grab her car keys and make her way back towards the front door, Louis is beyond frustrated and finds himself looking around for a smoke. He quit last month so finding a cigarette might prove rather more difficult than he had hoped.

He is sure he stashed some away in his cupboard in case of emergencies like this but he has spent the last 15 mins searching with absolutely no luck at all. Air he needs fresh air.

The moment he walks out his back door, he walks over to lay down on the poolside day bed. Louis takes a few deep breaths hoping to calm himself down, trying hard to not think about a smoke but that is harder than he thought when his nose picks up a nicotine scent. He flings his head around as he stands, walking over closer to his neighbour’s fence.

“ Harry?“ Louis asks quietly.

Harry stills.

“ Harry? I can smell your smoke I know it’s not Lexi“

Louis lifts his foot onto the fence metal beam allowing him to pull himself up to view over the fence.

Harry is sitting at his fancy bar under his gazebo. There is a beer bottle next to him and a smoke hanging out the side of his mouth. Louis forgets all about his own troubles momentarily as he automatically can’t stand the sight of Harry looking so sad, and worn out. Harry is now consuming Louis’s worries not El. Louis hates seeing Harry not being his normal joyful carefree funny self. If Harry isn’t happy then Louis can’t be either.

Louis jumps the fence without thinking it through ripping his pants in the process.

“ Shit !!!“

Harry unexpectedly giggles and that makes Louis smile.

“ Oh boy Haz, you are smoking huh what has happened? It must be bad if you have succumbed to a ciggie“

Louis sees the opened packet and reaches for one as Harry smacks his hand away.

“ Excuse me, Mr Tomlinson, there is no way no matter how much of a shitty night you must have had as well, I will not let you fuck up all your hard work of quitting…. nope, no way….never“

Louis pouts and bats his eyelids and Harry was only microseconds away from giving in. Stay strong Harry, look away, it’s what’s best for him.

Harry gets up walking over to the tiny white bar fridge opening it up and grabs two beers.

“ Here, that’s all I can offer you I’m afraid“

Louis takes the bottle with a smile, even if the smell of Harry’s last smoke still lingers in the air making him crave it more than ever.

“ Ok H, you look fucking horrible“

“ Jeez thanks, Lou, thanks….you don’t look like your normal handsome self either so shut the fuck up“

Both the men laugh and Harry can’t help but eye Louis up and down taking in how exactly shitty he did indeed look. His hair was a mess across his forehead, his pants were now ripped and his t-shirt displayed a large stain of some sort of sauce. It didn’t matter to Harry how messy he was because Louis, still looked nothing but beautiful in his eyes.

Not liking where his own thoughts were taking him once again, Harry quickly opens up a conversation regarding his trip to the therapist and all that was said between himself and Lexi. Louis then informs Harry of his own disastrous night and both men are quick to down another beer.

“ A holiday? I can’t believe she even had the nerve to suggest it, I mean….. Like… they say love is more important than money but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug Harry?

There’s a burst of laughter out of Harry and Louis realises his job here is now complete. Standing up and stretching he turns to Harry.

“ Well I better get going, Elly is probably home by now, time to face the backlash I guess“

Harry stands pulling Louis in for a hug while whispering

“Thank you, Lou. I’m always here for you, no matter what ok”

Harry’s hand is slightly sliding up and down Louis’s back in what some would describe as a loving caress.

The hug seems to linger for longer than it should. Harry thinks he may have said something wrong by the way Louis suddenly tenses up, pulling back quickly.

“See you Tomorrow Lou”.

In an unusual manner, instead of saying goodbye as he generally does, Louis gives a half-hearted smile and quickly jumps the fence.

Harry doesn’t have the slightest clue of what the hell has just happened.

Louis, on the other hand, is dashing inside not paying attention to Elly who had returned and was cleaning up the kitchen. He raced to his ensuite bathroom locking the door. He turns on the tap cupping some water into his hands and splashing his face.

Starring into the mirror Louis is baffled, his heart is beating so dam fast it feels like it’s about to jump out of his chest. He walks over to his bed falling down onto his stomach. Harry is his best friend. The one person he feels complete with, the type of best friend he knows he treasures and couldn’t live without. His bestest of all friends.

So Louis is overly anxious and confused as to why when Harry whispered into his ear, shivers engulfed his entire back, at the same time his nose was blessed with Harry’s strong cologne and smokey minty breath. The goosebumps that succumbed throughout his body, the fluttery tight knots he felt in his stomach…….He doesn’t have an answer for any of it and he certainly cannot explain his hardened cock.

---

A/N Hope you guys are enjoying the story. Please remember to like comment and share.

Anyone have thoughts about the chapter you would like to share? I really enjoy feedback. :)

Chapter 3 - Get Together Gone Wrong

Every Sunday evening is BBQ night, where both the Styles and the Tomlinsons gather together for a night of games, drinks and genuine laughter. This has taken place religiously for the last 5 years since the neighbours had first met.

Both couples eagerly look forward to it every week. The women are usually wrapped up in their own little world, sat together at the small round cement table under the veranda. With their Martinis in hand, they love listening to each other’s latest gossip and fashion trends and quite often exchange hair and beauty tips seeing the night through.

For the lads let’s just say, Sundays meant both men thoroughly enjoyed that tiny bit of an escape from their demanding and uncontrollable wives as they generally sat around the grill with beers in tow.

Tonight, however, did not reflect this normality at all.

Harry wouldn’t engage with Lexi in the slightest, Elly wouldn’t look at Louis, and Louis was avoiding Harry at all costs. For the first time in history, everyone was wishing BBQ night would just hurry up and end already. There was inevitable tension everywhere you turned.

Harry was concerned about Louis. Normally if something was bothering him Harry was the first one to know about it but as Harry watched Louis tiptoe around him and recognised the lack of interest in any sort of conversation, he decides to just give him some space, even if the nagging feeling that he has done something wrong lingers in his thoughts.

When the food is finally served Louis can’t take the silence any longer. Everyone around the table is slightly shocked when Louis addresses Lexi.

“How’s it going at the firm Lex? Harry mentioned the other day you have been swamped with work.”

As close as Lexi and Elly were, similar to that of Harry and Louis, Lexi and Louis just never really clicked. Of course, they were friendly with each other, how could they not be when their retrospective spouses were their best friends. Even still it was no secret that the pair just had a mutual dislike for one another.

Louis didn’t appreciate Lexi’s attitude and “snobbishness” as he liked to call it. He always thought she somehow found a way to make Louis feel beneath her. Upon first meeting Lexi she had made a moderately rude remark regarding Louis’s profession.

A comment was made one evening about how being a writer wasn’t a ’ real ’ employment choice and from that moment on, there was always friction between the two. Harry had made Lexi apologise non the less but it was too late. Louis no doubtabley despised her.

Although Lexi knew Louis had pulled in a few good checks for his award-winning novels, she still saw him as Lazy. Anyone could see from the outside looking in that she was clearly just jealous of Louis and his freedom to spend time at home with his wife while she herself, was held up in office meetings majority of the time.

Louis was home, he got to spend some time with Elly, and he was never stressed out consistently like she was. Louis’s job was nowhere near as demanding as hers and Louis seemed to always appear happy especially with his marriage. Lexi wished for all that he had, and that subconsciously made her green with envy. Yet there was one other issue Lexi had with Louis and that was his close nit relationship with her husband, the close bond that she desired and wholeheartedly wished she had instead.

“ Fucking tiring, always busy, unlike some, I don’t get the luxury of ever having a break… you know? “

Harry glared at Lexi. Now to most people, the remark seemed casual and friendly but the bitchiness behind her words didn’t go unnoticed by those in the room and her smirk that followed certainly wasn’t missed either.

Harry pushes his plate into the middle of the table in a huff as he raises to his feet.

“ You never can contain that pretty little mouth of yours can you darling! You just don’t care about anyone’s feelings but your own!!!“

Everyone is frozen and shocked at Harry’s sarcastic outburst. You see, the couples never fight in front of each other, for 5 years in each other’s eyes they were in retrospect one big happy family. So tonight is definitely a first in that department and it’s not until this moment that Louis has finally witnessed the true agony in his face with how unhappy he really is in his marriage.

Harry leaves the table and only seconds later the sound of his car is heard leaving the driveway.

Lexi breaks down crying and Elly is quick to caress her back.

“ Oh, Lexi hun… it’s going to be ok“ Elly says trying to give her some sort of small comfort.

Louis makes the mistake of turning his attention to Elly.

“Hey babe, how about you go check on Harry yeah”

Before Louis even has a chance to respond Lexi beats him to it.

“ Yeah Louis, go make my husband happier like you normally do since clearly, I’m no good at it. “

Now, normally Louis would attack back. He can tell she’s not in a good place and is overly upset. Being the better man, he just flicks El a half-hearted smile and grabs his keys.

Louis knows where Harry is headed without even having to ask him. He decides to make a detour first to their local grocery shop.

Pulling up next to Harry’s car he can see him sitting on the rock at the edge of the cliff. A few years ago Louis had found this little lookout only a short drive from their house. The magnificent view shows all of London and right now as the time hits 9 pm London’s lights are all on show and it’s remarkably breathtaking. It’s their spot that no one else knows they visit, not even their own wives. When times get too tough, they both find themselves here. There’s something about the fresh air and the quietness that is simply soothing.

Louis doesn’t say anything to him, instead, he uses his elbow to nudge him over a bit to allow him room to sit beside him.

A good 5 minutes pass before Harry turns his head to Louis. Louis can tell he had been crying before he got there. It’s evident with his puffy swollen eyes.

“ Look I understand we are all a bit on edge tonight and are dealing with our own demons at the moment but Louis, what the fuck have I done to you. You have hardly said two words to me all evening“

Louis feels as thou all his blood has been drained from his head. He can’t tell Harry the real reason he has felt uncomfortable tonight so he does something he hasn’t done with Harry before……..he lies… Well sort of anyway, he doesn’t offer the entire truth and totally deflects the answer.

“ Elly is overspending again. You know best how much it infuriates me“

Harry nods his head in agreement and there’s a slight moment of silence. Louis can see by the way he is staring at him that his waiting for him to continue, that there’s more to the story. Louis gulps.

“ You remember how I mentioned my concerns about Elly cheating? Well, I didn’t go into too much detail last time but we haven’t had sex in months and I guess my thoughts are getting the best of me and I’m just fucking stressed out you know and being sexually frustrated isn’t helping either.“

Harry thinks about his response but not quick enough because Louis has beaten him to it.

“ That’s the other thing. She hasn’t come near me in months Haz. No sex, No blowies, no hand jobs, not a God dam thing and my guess is that that fucking Tom prick is reaping all my rewards!! ….dipping his banana into my peel, dunking his chocolate over my strawberry…do you get my fucking drift, Harry. I don’t know what to do anymore“

As serious as the conversation was, Harry had too much trouble trying to contain his laughter.

“It’s not funny asshole”

Louis backhands his bi-cep smiling as he shakes his head in amusement.

“ Fuck Lou, be careful you don’t want a case of the good ole blueballs“

“ That’s it you little shit “

Louis jumps up, rustles his feet into a stance, he raises his fists as he positions himself ready for a fight.

“ Look at these guns Hazza. Small but powerful“

Louis laughs as he leans down kissing his pecks. Harry grabs his tummy trying not to let any more squeals escape his mouth. Finally, the noise dies back down.

“ If it makes you feel any better Lou I haven’t had sex with Lexi for a while either. The difference is, I’m fucking horny just not for her. “

Stunned Louis raises an eyebrow.

“ What do you mean? Do you want a hooker or something? “

Harry smirks.

“ No don’t be silly, they’re too expensive.“ Louis chokes on his own saliva as he chuckles.

“ Might just have to settle for someone a little more in my budget, maybe kidnap u, place you in some lingerie, close my eyes and hope for the best “

“ Louis gasps placing his hand across his chest acting like his so pressed.

“ Harry Styles I am offended. I will have you know, my going rates are just as high, if not more than any other ’ good time’ around here…..Now you have earned two tickets to the gun show“

Louis and Harry laugh like crazy as Louis jumps around like a kid on Christmas morning.

“ Right c’mon let’s get going“

Louis extends his arm helping Harry to stand.

Returning to their vehicles Louis hands Harry the snacks he brought from the corner store.

“Go home eat these, have a cry, have a shower, watch a movie, have a wank I dunno.”

If only Louis knew just how spot-on he was going to be with that last one.

“ Just relax yeah. I hate seeing you this down H. If things really are as bad as you say they are, then I will support you with whatever decision you decide to make ok.“

Harry goes to pull Lou in for another hug and Louis can see it happening and for a split second, he panics. He had totally forgotten about his ’ situation’ with hugging him. He doesn’t get a chance to think about it any longer because Harry has flung his arms around him.

Louis can sense that familiar feeling of nerves forming in his stomach and just as he feels the need to pull back he doesn’t. He realises that even though he is feeling some sort of butterflies and a warm concoction of serotonin swarming his entire being, he isn’t aroused. It’s different this time, it doesn’t feel sexual at all, it feels more personal, more intimate and that is the moment Louis realises that this hug, was 100x more frightening than the other.

---

When Harry gets home he bypasses Lexi who is sitting on the lounge. A large yellow lamp illuminates the area as she turns another page of her book. Neither speak but they share a quick glance just as Lexi sips a mouthful of her red wine from her glass.

Again Harry heads into that of the guest room. Sitting down bending over to untie his shoes, out of nowhere Harry gets an idea. One that he cannot wait to share with his best mate.

He quickly pulls out his phone dialling his number and opts to facetime. As expected Louis answers straight away.

“ Miss me already huh “

Louis flicks his eyebrows up and down smiling.

“ Louis I have had the best fucking idea. You my friend are probably going to love me but hate me at the same time and - “

Harry was cut short by Louis’s interruption. It’s only now Harry notices Louis is leaning back against his bed head shirtless and even though over the previous summers he has seen this sight plenty of times before, for some reason tonight it knocks Harry’s breath straight out of him.

Louis leans close to the phone in an attempt to whisper but fails miserably.

“ I apologised to El, and she’s in the bathroom wearing nothing but a thong Harry. Did you hear me a thong !!! I’m finally gonna get a bit tonight. I will call you back tomorrow, wish me, luck bro.“

Harry doesn’t get to reply as Louis seeks to hang up the call as he places the phone on the bedside table. Harry shouldn’t be jealous at this turn of events but he is and it certainly isn’t because he’s just as horny. He moves his hand to close off the call when he realises Louis’s call is still connected.

He watches as El slowly grinds her way up over Louis’s torso planting soft tenderly kisses along the way. Harry knows this is wrong. He most definitely knows he needs to turn it off. He hovers his finger over the “end call” button but he can’t bring himself to push it.

El kisses his neck before she slides back down his body removing herself out of view from the Camera. Harry can’t fathom why he simply can’t hang up.

It’s then he witnesses Louis fling his head back. His hands grip the sheets and the veins in his neck are now prominent as he lets out a loud moan. Harry is mesmerised by Louis’s sexual motions. He watches intently as every little detail of Louis’s facials change with the intensity of his blow job.

His eyes are yet to deviate from Louis’s. Harry hasn’t realised yet, that as he listens to Louis start vigorously moan as he arches his back up off the bed, that He had begun stroking himself and was on the verge of his own climax. The moment he hears Louis scream ’ fucccck’ Harry shoots his own load all over his hand.

Completely disgusted in himself Harry slams the call off immediately reaching for an old shirt on the floor to wipe off his mess. He can’t believe he had just done that. He feels as though he has betrayed and disrespected his friend and He feels totally embarrassed. Right there, he promises at that moment to never let Louis know about this never! Never in a million years did Harry ever think he would witness his best friend getting off.

Then again, never in a million years would Harry know that Louis left the camera on deliberately, purposely wanting to see first-hand how his best friend would react.

But that’s a secret that both boys are determined not to share.

A/N

I’m

sorry if this chapter sucks. I have covid and am not

feeling

a 100 % however I was bored and really wanted to get a chapter

out

.

Thoughts/advice?

Chapter 4 - Suprise!

For a relationship to last, both people need to feel safe enough to truly be themselves.

Harry has always been Bi. He understood and accepted his sexuality when he was a teenager. However, he never did feel comfortable enough to share this important information with his wife.

For the last 24 hours, Harry hasn’t been able to stop thinking. He is over-contemplating his entire life decisions. Louis is consuming his thoughts once again and he has come to one big final conclusion. He has finally admitted to himself that his feelings towards Louis have become no longer platonic and they have also grown so much stronger.

Being attracted to another man doesn’t scare him in the least. What his having trouble adjusting to is the fact that it’s his best friend. He doesn’t want to risk anything. He doesn’t want to lose what he already has with him.

Having a soul mate is not always about love. You can find your soul mate in friendship too.

Harry is stuck not knowing how far he can push that boundary. Unknown to him, life sometimes and quite often doesn’t let you determine that decision on your own.

---

Louis however is feeling on top of the world after his night with Elly. It’s nearing lunch time and for the first time in a long while, Louis feels he has slightly re-connected with his wife. The unexpected intimacy displayed from her last night has Louis walking on cloud nine.

He collects his phone sending her a quick text. He figures something like a cute lunch date might keep up the momentum. His mood is instantly shattered when he receives her reply. ’ Can’t babe, I am swamped in the office, maybe another time ok?“

He doesn’t let this bring him down though because, if she is stuck at work, then he still wants to do something nice for her. He reaches over the kitchen counter swiping up his car keys. He drives to a nearby florist to buy the biggest bunch of red roses. On the drive over to her office building, he can’t seem to remove his smile.

As he arrives at her reception desk, he looks around noticing there is no one in sight. It doesn’t bother him, he knows where her office is, so he decides to just proceed behind the desk making his way down the corridor. He knocks gently on her door before slowly opening it. To his surprise, her office is a replica of the rest of the building… it’s empty.

Deep in his own thoughts, he doesn’t hear another person approach him from behind.

“ Excuse me, sir, may I ask what you are doing in here?“

Louis spins around coming face to face with a petite middle-aged woman.

“ Oh I’m sorry, I’m just looking for Elly“

“ Well I’m sorry but she is not here she is currently out on a lunch date.“

His body stiffens at her words. A lunch date. A fucking lunch date!!

“ Ok. Do you have a rough estimate of how long she is going to be?“

“ Well Id say you are free to sit around and wait but that would be pointless. When Elly and Tom finish lunch they are making their way over to the charity Auction“

“ Charity Auction?“ Louis repeats needing further confirmation of what he had just heard.

“ Yes, the charity auction over at ‘Fashion. Co’ I do really hope she wins the clothes and the accessories that she has been talking about all day, she truly deserves it after all her hard work this week.“

He can not for the life of him produce any words. There’s a fire burning through his veins and it’s taking everything he has to not explode all his frustration and anger out onto this poor woman.

“ May I ask who are you ?“

Louis finally lifts his head acknowledging her question.

“ No -one important by the looks of things.“

He doesn’t wait for her response. He shoves past her quickly, storming out of the building. He dumps the roses into the bin on the sidewalk and speeds home. Just when he thought things we were getting back on track this is thrown into his face. He paced the lounge room repeatedly shaking his head from side to side. He finally stops, letting out a scream.

Lunch with Tom….. Auction…… Spending money….. All the lying……

There are too many thoughts going through his head.

Looking at his watch he notices it’s almost 5 pm and he remembers Harry saying he was going to be back from work by 6. It’s times like these that Louis needs Harry. He is the only one who can calm him down, the only one who always has the right words that he needs to hear. He needs Harry’s comfort. He flicks him a quick message.

To Harry:

“ Let me know when you are home I really need to see you“

As always Harry replies instantly.

To Louis:

“ I’m already home, ended up leaving work earlier than expected.“

Harry barely has time to place his phone back down before he hears the front doorbell. Surprised at the promptness Harry unlocks the door. He goes to say hello but Louis has already strode past him. Harry follows him back into his kitchen where he watches Louis help himself to a beer out of the fridge. He pops open the lid taking a huge swig as harry stands there watching with curiosity. Louis Looks at Harry, his face bright red with anger and Harry can already tell he is at breaking point.

“ I’m going to fucking kill her!!!!“

Harry’s eyes widen. Opening up the fridge he grabs himself a beer and signals to the back door. They place themselves at the bar, the bar being their common place to unwind with their problems. Harry takes a deep breath.

“ What has she done now? “

The men haven’t realised that 2 hours have passed until the sun has gone down. Louis feels a lot more at ease now his spoken with his best friend.

Harry would never admit it out loud but his kind of glad Louis and Elly are having issues. They have always been known as the perfect couple and now he finally gets to see that perfect, is far from the truth. He just wishes he didn’t have to witness Louis so upset. That’s the one and only thing that his heart can not cope with.

Louis stands up stretching. He picks up his empty bottles and walks over placing them into the recycling bin.

“ I better get going Lexi should be home any minute now yeah? “

Harry shrugs his shoulders accompanied with a hand run through his hair.

“ Who knows…………..Oh fuck I almost forgot.“

Harry remembers the idea he had last night and Louis seemed intrigued at Harry’s sudden smile. Harry’s nibbling on his bottom lip with nerves.

“ Before you say no, hear me out. “

“ That alone is scaring me Haz.“

Harry grabs hold of his hand pulling him back down onto the stall. 

“ Ok. So last night I called you because I had an idea - …..“

Suddenly Harry remembers the video call they had shared and all the images that are stored in his memory flashes before his eyes and a breath gets caught in his throat. He coughs a little, embarrassed at his thoughts, not noticing the small smirk that had appeared on Louis’s face when he too had, had the same recollection.

Exhaling as he blows out his breath he decides to just say it quickly and hope for the best.

“ Let’s send our wives on a holiday “

Louis hasn’t responded and Harry is debating whether Louis simply hadn’t heard him or whether he may have just misunderstood him. Just as Harry opens his mouth to repeat himself Louis frowns.

“ Are you fucking crazy!! ?“ He spits out.

Not the reaction he was hoping for. Harry burrows his eyebrows in confusion.

“ I’m sorry Lou, I just thought maybe everyone taking a break might help us all. If you don’t like the suggestion that’s fine, it was a stupid idea.“

Louis lets out the tiniest chuckle

“ Of course, I want to get rid of her for a while Harry it’s a great idea really, it’s just ….. it’s the money part I’m worried about. You should have known that.“

Harry smiles as he fondly watches Louis run both his hands over his face.

“ Louis it was all my idea, I will pay for it all.“

“ NO FUCKING WAY STYLES“

Louis shakes his head in disbelief at engaging in this conversation. Elly burning through money has been the main topic of arguments for the last few months. Louis knows wasting the last of his savings to send his lying over-spending wife on a holiday that she’s been asking for, is probably going to keep him up every night for the rest of his life with regret.

“ Ok….but….There’s no way you are paying for my wife.“

“Louis c’mon I- “

“ Please Harry. I couldn’t ever let you do that. If I’m going to let you talk me into this at least let me pay for it. “

The men waste no time organising the surprise for their spouses. Louis suggests New York as El had mentioned it just the other day, which surprises Harry.

“ Shit Lou, I mean, I was thinking a holiday over in the next state but you wanna kick ’em out the country!“

Both burst out laughing before Louis nudges Harry’s shoulder as he opens up his laptop in search of available flights.

“Oh Fuck up, you” Louis giggles and continues.

“ Well the further away she is from me at the moment the safer it is for her. I’m still extremely pissed about all the shit she’s been pulling lately.“

Harry gives a weak smile before adverting his attention back to the screen.

“ Do you think this is such a great idea booking all this when we haven’t even spoken to them about it? I mean, I know Elly is not gonna have a problem with any of it but what about Lexi? Can she even have time off from her job?“

Harry continues clicking away at the keyboard his eyes focused on the screen.

“ I really don’t care what she thinks about it. I need a fucking break from her before she suffocates me.“  

Louis’s phone starts ringing.

“ Its El“

“ Don’t mention any of this yet“

Louis answers the call and after Elly informs Louis that she won’t be home for another hour, he grits his teeth as he says his goodbye.

“ You know, I’m not gonna even address her about Tom or her lying or the auction cos I know if I do, it will erupt into a major fight and then she might not want to accept the holiday. “

Harry grins. He stands up from his chair in search of his wallet needing his details to fill out all the info needed to continue the bookings.

“ Haz I’m going to head home for a bit, take a shower. When do you want to tell the girls?“

Harry’s phone beeps with a notification of a text message from Lexi saying she was on her way home. Harry doesn’t reply and quickly fills in the last section of the booking.

“ After you guys have had dinner, bring El over and we can tell them together yeah?“

“ Sounds fair. I will text when we are on our way“

Louis taps the back of Harry’s shoulder twice saying his goodbye as he makes his way to the front door. Again Louis’s cell beeps as Harry watches him open his phone. Harry presses his lips together tightly waiting for the fury that’s about to unravel from Louis. Louis spins around so fast he could have given himself whiplash.

“ HAAARRRRYYYYYY!!!!!“

You see, Harry has known Louis for a very long amount of time now and he knows Louis deep down isn’t going to be too mad. He doesn’t do it to piss him off, he has done it because he only wants to help him out.  Louis is storming back down the passage towards him.

“ You mother fucker!!“

He says as he tries his hardest to look angry when it’s truly visible that he isn’t.

“ Shut up Tomlinson, you know you bloody love me, I just wanted to do this for you and frankly now you don’t have a choice, so suck it up. “

Louis looks back down at the email containing Elly’s plane ticket. He shakes his head as he pulls Harry in for a tight hug.

“Thank you, H.”

“ Stop it, go on, get home and have ya shower!“

As Louis walks across into his own yard he thinks about Harry’s words.

‘You know you bloody love me’

And he does. He loves Harry very much. He would do absolutely anything for him, no matter what it was and under any circumstance.  Now he thinks about it, he scares himself into thinking about, just how much he would endeavour to keep Harry happy and safe and that thought kind of terrifies him.

---

It’s 1.5 hours later when Elly and Louis arrive back at the Styles household. Elly is in such a good mood and it’s pissing Louis off. He realises it’s probably cos she won her items today but all he can concentrate on is the fact she’s hiding it all from him.

Lexi is tired. She hasn’t been sleeping too well since Harry moved out of the master bedroom and her work has been marginally more stressful. Harry is the first to break only 15 mins after they arrive, as his way too eager to share the news.

“ Lexi, Elly…….. Louis and I have a surprise for you both.“

Harry looks at his wife, placing her hand in his. After all, he needs to look and sound convincing.

“ Darling. I know you have had a rough few months and work has had you stressed out more than usual. Things have been a little rough between us and for that I’m sorry“

Harry is proud of how well he is lying. He knows he has to make this all believable in hopes of her accepting this trip because Harry really needs some space from her. A lot of space actually, approximately 3,459 miles of it apparently.

Harry looks to Louis nodding towards Elly. Louis’s eyes widen and Harry already knows Louis is cursing the fuck out of him inside his head.

“ El, the lord knows you have been over the top busy at work, working all these continuous late nights and never getting home early, never - “

Harry clears his throat rather loudly gaining Louis’s attention. Louis smirks.

“ Anyway sweet. What Harry and I are both trying to say is that we have decided that you girls need a well-deserved break. A chance to relax and regain some energy. Soooo. “

Harry can’t wait any longer and interrupts.

“  We have booked you a holiday to New York and you leave tomorrow morning“

Both women have yet to comprehend what they have just been told as they stare blankly at Harry. Elly registers first.

“ New York !!!! Omg !!!“ She screams.

Her reaction was exactly as Louis said it would be. Excited, would be an understatement.

Lexi on the other hand looked sad but only Harry knew her well enough to pick up on it.

“ Did you hear that hun we are going to New York“ Elly squeals.

“ I can not go “ Lexi suddenly says.

Harry and Louis share a quick panicked look.

Elly is the first to respond.

“ What ..why?“

“ That’s too short a notice, I wouldn’t be able to get time off“

“ I already emailed your boss earlier. He said it was fine and that you deserved it “

Harry replies way too quickly.

“ Well, that’s sorted then. “ Elly says enthusiastically.

“ How long is it for ?“ Lexi asked curiously.

“ A whole month “

Louis’s eyes snap to Harry’s in astonishment.

“ This is bloody crazy,“ Elly says as she jumps into Louis’s arms.

“Thank you baby” El cries.

“ Yeah, thank you baby “ Lexi remarks sarcastically so only Harry would hear.

“ Right you guys better get a move on  to get packing, you have a very early start.“ Louis suggests.

The 4 of them spend a few minutes discussing the details of the plan for the morning rush. The moment El and Louis leave, Harry could cut the tension in the room with a knife.

Silence. Nothing but silence.

Silence often speaks when words cannot.

Silence isn’t empty. On the contrary, it’s full of answers.

Lexi places her glass in the kitchen sink and walks upstairs not saying a word. Harry doesn’t know what to say or do. He knew she wouldn’t be over the moon about the trip but he at least thought she would be a little excited about it.

Harry gives it 40 minutes before he finally attempts to enter her bedroom. Upon walking in, he sees Lexi sitting on her bed next to her suitcase as she folds a pair of jeans.

Harry stays at the door, confused about what step he should take next.

“ You just want to get rid of me don’t you?“

Harry is shocked as he stands there looking like a deer caught in headlights. Lexi gets up walking into the bathroom, searching through her overhead vanity. Harry leans up against the bathroom door frame with his arms crossed. He knows she’s not looking for anything, in particular, she’s just trying to keep herself occupied.

Harry can feel a wave of guilt flow through him. He doesn’t hate Lexi he still loves her, just not in the way he should anymore.

“ I’m sorry. “ Harry let’s out.

Lexi looks at Him through the vanity mirror. Harry uses his finger and thumb to gently pull at his bottom lip nervously.

“ Our marriage is in trouble isn’t it?“  she asks.

Harry’s face falls towards the ground. He has two options here and he has no clue how to proceed.

1. He can lie, and pretend it’s all going to be ok so she doesn’t refuse the holiday and everything’s fine and all goes to plan or …
2. He can confess his feelings and tell the truth about his thoughts regarding their marriage, resulting in Lexi possibly pulling out of the vacation.

Lexi splashes her face with water and Harry can see the pain behind her eyes.

“ Come sit“ He asks.

He makes his choice and continues to speak with Lexi. Any moment now he will realise whether he has made the right decision or not. He knew she would cry, either way, that was expected. Lexi wipes her eyes on her sleeve.

“ We should talk more about this when I get back.“

Lexi stands up removing her wedding band and placing it on the bedside table. Watching the scene take place in front of him hurts Harry more than he had expected it to.

When two people decide on divorce, it’s not because the couple simply don’t understand each other, however, it is a sign that they have slowly begun to.

---

Louis can’t sleep. He can’t stop thinking about how much bliss he is going to get without Elly around. He can’t believe Harry booked the holiday for an entire month.

What Louis doesn’t know is that the next month is going to impact his entire world in ways he had never imagined. What he also doesn’t know is that, as scary as things will appear, he is going to fucking love it all.

A/N

Sorry for the wait guys.

What are your thoughts on the chapter?

I’ve already started the next chapter and I’m gonna tell you I love it. Things are gonna heat up pretty quickly in the next few chapters so buckle up. Haha .

Chapter 5 - Goodbye Wives

One must choose in life between making money and spending money, because you will find, that there’s no time to do both.

As grateful as Louis was for Harry purchasing Elly’s flight tickets, he still had to provide the extra cash for accommodation, food, and no doubt lots of shopping expenditures.

As the two men stand side by side waving at their wives one last time as they stroll down towards the entrance of the plane, Louis can’t help but realise that the money he reluctantly handed over was probably the best decision he had ever made.

Saying goodbye to Elly was a lot easier than he expected. Watching Elly pack her bags into the car this morning, however, he did have a slight feeling of regret about the whole vacation, as the realization of him being alone without her scared him.

The moment the girls had disappeared out of sight Harry wrapped his arm around Louis’s shoulder.

“ You feel that Lou?’

Louis glanced at Harry confused with a raised eyebrow. Harry flashes a cunning smile as he removes his hand from his shoulder opting to pat his back twice.

“ That dear Louis is freedom!“

Louis barks out a laugh as they both turn around to exit the terminal. As expected the wholesome four had shared a ride this morning all agreeing it would be less stressful. Knowing how extremely busy and cluttered airports are, they had all decided catching a uber would be easier than finding and paying for car parking.

Harry spots the uber he ordered and they both jump in. As the car takes off and heads back in towards the city Harry out of nowhere informs the driver of a little detour.

“ Hey, do you mind if I change the destination please?“

Louis snaps his head towards Harry and Louis can already tell by the way Harry is trying to contain his smile that he is up to no good.

“ Do I dare even ask?“ Louis enquires.

Instead of answering Louis, Harry redirects his attention back to the driver.

“ If you don’t mind can you please drop us off at “The Hindley”.

The driver nods his head understanding the new demand as he quickly changes the details into his GPS.

“ Harry are you serious? It’s fucking still morning.“

“ Yes, yes it is…annnd who is it exactly that is here to tell me off huh…….you?“ Harry makes a note with such cheek.

“ You know what, your absolutely right. Your crazy, but your right“

It doesn’t take long to reach their destination. Getting out of the car Louis shakes his head in amusement as Harry smiles. He places one hand on the door, opening it up as he steps to the side.

“ After you Mr Tomlinson“

“ Why do I have a feeling I’m going to be nothing but busy and surprised for the next month Harry, I swear you are out on a mission to get me into trouble!“

If only Louis knew exactly how much those words would truly come into play.

Entering the establishment they both look around until they find a free table. It doesn’t take long until a beautiful blonde-haired woman appears at their table ready to take their order.

Louis looks at the woman and blushes. Harry is holding back a burst of laughter that is getting too hard to contain.

“ Um yeah…mmm..ah… I will just have a beer, whatever is on tap, thanks love…….Harry?“

Harry doesn’t take his eyes off of Louis as he replies.

“ I will have whatever he has. “

The moment she walks away Louis leans across the table and punches Harry’s arm.

“ I cannot believe you brought me here. Imagine if Elly saw me, I’d be a fucking dead man.“

Harry takes a look around the room noticing how many people are indeed present before staring back at him.

“ Well lucky for you she’s currently 30,000 feet in the air, travelling in a totally different direction.“

Louis giggles as he fixes his fringe by gently pushing it to the side of his forehead.

“The Hindley” you see, is somewhat of a good old fashion gentleman’s club that is open 24/7, although most locals just call it a topless bar.

Now the idea behind Harry’s thoughts of attending this place was purely out of consideration for Louis. After all, Harry has only known Louis to be straight, therefore The Hindley was a perfect choice.

Harry loved watching the redness appear on Louis’s cheeks every time a woman walked past their table. He found it extremely cute the way his words stumbled out his mouth each time one of the ladies spoke to him. This is what Harry needed today. He needed the laughs and seeing Louis having so much fun was now feeling like the best notion in the world.

They spent roughly an hour inside the place sipping on beers before Louis mentioned he was hungry. Harry suggests the new sushi place down the road and Louis jumps at the idea.

Walking out of the venue Louis makes a comment about one of the waitresses.

“ Did you notice the lady with the huge tattoo on her boob Haz that looked amazing“

“ Yeah“ he replies.

Harry burrows his eyebrows in deep thought as they make their way down the street. He soon realises that he can’t remember any of the waitresses. Their names, Tattoos, and appearance. Nothing! Because even though he was in a room full of half-naked women he still only had eyes for Louis.

After spending some time at the sushi restaurant both of them have full bellies and decide to head home by calling a taxi.

Arriving at Harry’s they find themselves both sprawled out on the couch with their hands resting on their stomachs.

“ I’m so fucking full. I feel that if I eat anything else, I could literally burst“

“ I know right, I really don’t want to move right now in case I vomit.“

They both sit in a comfortable silence for a few minutes until Louis sits up reaching for the TV remote.

“ Netflix ?“

Harry stands up to stretch a little raising his arms above his head.

“ I’m just gonna grab a drink, you want anything? “

“ ah yeah a Water thanks“

Harry exits the room while Louis collectively makes the decision to move to the same couch as Harry, yelling out for Harry to hear him.

“ Do you have any popcorn?“

Harry yells back from the other room.

“ I do, but how the fuck are you going to fit that into that tiny belly of yours? Thought you just said you were full?“

Louis smirks and doesn’t reply because he knows Harry will bring it in anyway. He decides to scroll through Netflix and settles on some scary TV show. When Harry enters the room minutes later he laughs when he sees the selection as he plonks down onto the seat beside him.

Handing him the popcorn Harry turns himself a little bit away from Louis kicking his feet up and over the edge of the couch so he can lay back a bit to stretch out.

By the time they reach the 8th episode Louis is so intrigued that he finds himself jumping here and there at the scary parts and Harry can’t help but tease the fuck out of him. Either of them don’t care because the playfulness is welcoming and soothing for them both.

Before they know it, a few hours have passed and when they finally reach the final episode Louis is scared as hell from the show’s twisted sickening ending.

“ That was truly fucked up man like, super bat shit crazy. Like I’m grossed out but scared at the same time.“

Harry reaches his arm out and cups Louis’s cheek.

“ You Poor little baby, and here I was mistaken you for a grown man all these years, how terribly wrong I was.“

Louis widens his mouth open pretending to be offended.

“ Fuck you, Harold! “

Harry pokes his tongue out which prompts Louis to jump forward attacking him with tickles.

When both of them remember that they are indeed adults and calm down, Louis decides he needs to visit the bathroom and stands up.

“ You going home now?“ Harry asks as he looks at the clock on the wall noticing it was now 9 pm. Louis chuckles as he shakes his head no.

“ You are kidding right, there’s no way I’m going anywhere until we watch something else. I need to cleanse my mind of all that psychotic blood-curdling crap we just saw before I have to go home and sleep alone“

“ You want me to change your nappy now, collect you a bottle maybe?“

“ Fuck up you!! I’m not a baby, that shit shouldn’t be allowed on Netflix, seriously who watches that shit thinking it’s ok to sleep peacefully afterwards?“

When Louis returns from his toilet break he notices that Harry is laying down across the couch. He lifts up Harry’s head as he sits letting Harry’s head fall back down into his lap. It should feel awkward and weird but for some reason, it simply doesn’t.

“ A rom-com Haz, seriously?“

Harry moves his head back to face Louis and you can see the grin and hesitation before he shoots back the banter.

“ I mean in all honesty I was thinking you should stick to a children’s rating with your wussiness, so be glad I upped it to a PG rating you scardy cat“

Louis uses his finger to poke those gorgeous dimples that are being flashed in front of his eyes.

There’s not much more said after that. 1/4 way through the movie Louis notices Harry hasn’t moved for a while. Upon further investigation, he can now see his chest rising up and down slowly. He leans forward a little checking and yes his eyes are definitely closed.

Grabbing the controller he turns down the volume and its then he hears Harry’s tiny snores.

Snoring is one thing Louis cannot tolerate. It drives him utterly insane. So he can’t help but frown when he realises that the tiny sounds escaping Harry’s mouth are not only NOT annoying him but is making him feel relaxed and somewhat very tired himself.

Looking down at him Louis takes his thumb into his mouth biting his nail. His very conscious of his thoughts and his debating whether he should just do it or not. The temptation is too strong as Louis gives in. Lowering his hand he runs it through Harry’s curls that are falling down over his thigh.

Each time Louis runs his hand through Harry’s hair, different types of feelings erupt. Louis lets his head fall back onto the back of the couch as he closes his eyes taking in the softness of his locks.

He lifts his head back upwards quite swiftly as he feels himself get hard. Like always, things never go Louis’s way, as he sits there hoping Harry won’t move…. but he does.

Not only does Harry move his head, but he also moves his whole body turning around to face Louis and the gay panic has well and truly sunk in. He tries to tell himself not to think about it but his dick has other ideas as it twitches totally sending Louis into a meltdown.

Harry’s cheek was pressing against his boner and there was no way on this planet that he wouldn’t have felt it.

Louis lifts Harry’s head carefully but quickly. He picks up the throw rug placing it over him. He picks up his keys and phone and heads for the exit.

On the walk home all Louis finds himself doing is praying to God that Harry never woke up.

---

Waking up alone in a big bed was something Louis hasn’t had to experience for a very long time.

The moment he kicks off the duvet he hears his phone ding. It’s a snap chat from Elly of her and Lexi in New York. It makes him smile but it soon fades as he remembers leaving Harry’s last night.

Today the boys had planned a golf trip but Louis didn’t want to face him today. Being embarrassed and confused about Harry was a massive understatement. For the first time in 5 years, Louis cancels on Harry with a lame excuse of not feeling well and hides away all day.

---

When the next day arrives, once again Louis finds another excuse and then another and another. By day 4 Harry knows something isn’t sitting right. So instead of Texting asking if his ok like he has been, he takes the initiative and heads over next door.

Lifting his hand to knock is the exact same time Louis opens the door.

“ Hi“ “ Hi“

There’s an unpleasant awkwardness between the two and neither one of them has no idea how to fix it.

“ You off somewhere?“ Harry questions.

“ Just gonna head out for a walk to clear my head that’s all.“

“ Mind if I join?“

“ Sure“

Deciding he can no longer stand the silence, Harry makes every effort to engage in any type of conversation. Louis stops in the middle of the pathway holding onto Harry’s arm.

“ You fancy a drink tonight? I really really really need a drink.“

Louis tugs Harry by his arm into the pub across the street.

Harry watches Louis as they walk across the road and he knows there’s something wrong. He can feel it, see it and sense it. He carefully watches Louis take no time ordering a shot and downing it.

There’s a sense of anxiousness that fills Harry’s body. He wants to know what’s wrong with him but he knows Louis too well. He knows waiting for Louis to bring it up himself is the only way he will get him to talk, but he decides to ask anyway.

“ Louis, what’s going on? “

Louis knows that Harry genuinely cares for him when he asks that question because when Louis replies with the word ‘nothing’ harry continues to wait for the truth.

“ Seriously Haz c’mon lad, just have a drink with me.“

And when Louis skulls down another shot promptly and smiles at Harry with those captivating blue eyes, that was the moment Harry knew he was in big trouble.

---

Harry is not going to lie, the amount of alcohol Louis has consumed tonight has had him concerned. He doesn’t think he has ever seen him this intoxicated before. He struggles to unlock his front door as his other hand is trying to contain Louis from collapsing to the ground.

“ Babe, can you just carry me please“

Babe? Harry momentarily loses his train of thought at the unexpected pet name nearly dropping him in the process. As the lock finally clicks open he scoops him up and flings him over his shoulder securing him via his thighs while his torso hangs down Harry’s back. Harry literally takes three steps in the door when he is surprised with a slap to his ass.

Louis seems to think his hilarious and starts laughing hysterically proceeding to continue slapping over and over again. What Harry does notice is the last slap where Louis’s hand lingers on his behind followed by the most gentle barely there squeeze.

“ I’ve always wanted to do that“ He whispers his voice now turned serious but barely heard, obviously with no intention of Harry hearing it, but he has.

No matter how much this action has affected Harry, he realises his words are only due to his sexual frustration and the excessive amount of liquor. With saying that Harry can not deny how pleasing it felt to have Louis’s hands positioned there.

Harry decides to swing him up and around opting to carry him bridal style instead. He is quiet now, too quiet and out of his peripheral vision he notices Louis staring and if Harry’s eyes weren’t playing tricks on him, he could have sworn Louis was licking his lips. Harry knows he can’t look at him because if he does, they both may end up tumbling backwards down the stairs.

Harry has not slept in his master bedroom for over a week now as he continues to utilize the guest room, so he decides to place Louis into his old bed that Lexi solely occupies. He seems to have semi-passed out as he lays him down gently onto the bed. Harry removes his shoes and socks and just as he’s about to try and lift the blanket up over him, Louis lifts his hips up indicating for Harry to pull his jeans off.

A few weeks ago Harry wouldn’t have even hesitated but now that worry about boundaries is all he can think about. Louis groans a little.

“ C’mon hurry up already. “

Harry slowly unzips the jeans, noticing the sudden climb in his own heart rate. He tucks his fingers into the top of his pants tugging them off and dropping them to the floor, leaving Louis in just his shirt and boxers. Harry pulls the blanket up over him.

“ Goodnight Lou“

He doesn’t get a response so he assumes he is finally asleep. Harry smiles fondly before proceeding to leave the room. He stops at the door turns the light off and pauses when he hears Louis speak.

“ Come and cuddle me already would ya“

Harry freezes.

Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries

Boundaries is all that is running through his head but somehow his body seems to have a mind of its own as he finds himself already standing next to him beside the bed. Louis taps the space beside him.

“ Get in“

Harry hates to shamelessly admit how quickly he removes his shoes, smartly deciding to leave his clothes on as he slides in next to him.

The room is dark but there is a small ray of light from the moon that is beaming through the side of the curtains giving Harry just enough light to see Louis’s face. He has his eyes closed and all Harry can think about now is how much he wants to tell Louis how beautiful he looks.

Without realising what it is that he is doing, Harry uses his hand to gently push a piece of Louis’s hair away from his eyes. The moment he realises his actions, he quickly retracts his hand. It’s what happens next that has Harry regretting his decision of not leaving the room.

Before he even has a chance of acknowledging what is happening Louis lunges forward connecting their lips. It all happens so fast and the kiss is short but the warmth of his lips will never be forgotten. When Louis drops his head back to the pillow Harry runs his finger over his lips still in disbelief at what has just happened.

Harry’s heart swells with happiness. He has thought about this moment several times and now that it has happened, he can’t contain the fireworks that are exploding throughout him. Louis has kissed him and Harry is already craving the contact once again.

All emotions are soon switched off as a single tear builds up in Harry’s eye. What swarmed his heart with pure joy only moments ago is now filled with nothing but hurt and sorrow as Louis mumbles.

“ Goodnight Elly.“

---

---

A/N

Sooo.

There you have it, their first couple of days without their wives.

What are your thoughts?

I really enjoyed writing this chapter.

As always if you are enjoying the story please vote and thank you for all the wonderful comments it keeps me motivated. :)

Chapter 6 - Unexpected

The shattering of a heart when being broken is the loudest type of ‘quiet’ that you will ever hear. You don’t die from a broken heart but sometimes…….you wish you did.

Harrys worst battle right now is between ‘what he knows’ and ‘what he feels’.

Looking down at Lexi’s wedding ring that is swirling around on his finger as he sits on the side of the bed, his mind is working over time. He knows that when he made his vows to Lexi that he had meant each and every single word. He knows the right thing to do is to try and salvage his marriage and that falling back in love with his wife shouldn’t be so hard.

It all sounds so easy in theory but he can’t escape what he feels, especially when Louis is now consuming his thoughts with every second, every hour, of every day. He feels his heart has made up its mind and has taken it upon itself to attach to the one person he just can’t have. Harry lets out a loud sigh. It’s hard to tell your mind to stop loving someone…. when your heart still does.

When Harry had woken up this morning in the guest bedroom his first intuition was to check on Louis. Walking down the corridor he notices before he reaches the room that the bedroom door is wide open and Louis…..is nowhere in sight.

The bed has been made and there’s a small note sitting on the bedside table.

“ I’m sorry“

-L

That’s all it reads. It’s then he notices Lexi ring and places the note down. Harry can only assume the ‘I’m sorry’ is an apology for getting so drunk and having to have Harry look after him. He knows there’s no way Louis remembers the kiss, definitely not after calling him Elly.

Harry is starting to think that pinning over someone he knows he can’t have is really starting to take a toll on him. Gathering up all his thoughts and desires about Louis and locking them deep away in the back of his mind, seems like it’s the only way to stop this madness of nothing but wishful thinking.

When Louis passed out last night, you may have expected him to leave straight away, but he didn’t remove himself from the bed. He decided to lay there for a little over an hour just watching Louis sleep. To some, this may sound creepy, but to harry, it served as a purpose. A time to just sit back and admire the one that he so badly seems to now crave, who inadvertently is also the same one he simply can not touch.

He knew he may never get this opportunity again so every time Louis sighed, breathed or made any type of movement, Harry watched on intently making sure to tenderly store each and every memory so as to never forget that special secret moment.

Eventually, Harry carefully crawled out and returned to his bed to get some sleep but not before shedding a quiet cry to himself. He can not believe how much things have changed in the last few weeks.

Going from being married to wanting a divorce, and going from loving your best friend to being IN love with your best friend. It’s all starting to feel too much.

He realises deep down he can never have Louis. With that being said Harry makes an on the spot decision to reign it all back in and return to just enjoying spending time with his friend. His happily married straight best mate.

Unlike Louis, even though harry was hurt and confused by all the latest unexpected events, he doesn’t try to shut Louis out. In fact, he decides he wants to see him even more today, which not only is this a shock to us but also to Harry himself. He thinks for a little bit and settles on inviting him out to somewhere they haven’t been since they first met.

Louis answers the phone just before Harry was about to hang up. As it had nearly rang out with no answer, Harry was scared that Louis again was seemingly avoiding him. So when he heard his voice say Hello he relaxed a little.

Half an hour later and the two men find themselves driving along in the car. Louis is singing his heart out to Oasis blaring through the speakers and Harry can’t help but notice how much of a good mood he is in.

Harry pulls into the car park, turning off the engine and unclips his seatbelt. Louis is already half out the door, eagerly wanting to proceed inside.

“ I can’t believe we are going here again. Be prepared to have your fucking ass beaten styles.“

“ Yeah ok, we will see about that “ Harry fires back.

Stepping inside the arcade, the venue hasn’t changed at all. From the retro wallpaper to the same red leather booths the place is still identical to what it was 5 years ago.

The Luna Arcade holds a special place in both their hearts. It’s here that the boys first bumped into each other, immediately becoming joined at the hips.

Harry and Louis didn’t believe that the universe worked in mysterious ways. Some may say, it was fate that played a huge part when the inseparable men discovered they had just become neighbours a few days prior without any knowledge. From day one, both of their lives changed, as each of them could not go one day without seeing the other and neither of them would have it any other way.

Harry watches Louis speed walk towards the Daytona race cars and the memories soon flood his head making Harry smile brightly.

Harry loves Daytona and is extremely good at it. Harry use to beat Louis the majority of the time and Louis claimed he was just letting Harry win so as to not let him feel bad.

Harry giggles to himself as he approaches his seat slouching down into it. When I say Harry is good I mean he’s really good. To the point that No-one can ever beat him. So who’s really letting who win? but Harry has always kept that detail to himself and he always will, mainly because he loves seeing Louis squeal with such excitement when he thinks that he has yet again had victory.

“ You wanna make a bet Haz“

“ Hell yes, what am I gonna win exactly cos you do know I’m gonna win right?“

Louis pouts his mouth as he taps his lips as Harry can see the wheels turning over inside of his head as he thinks hard.

“ I’ve got it. If I win you owe me a back massage !“

Harry feels his body tighten. He tries not to let Louis see him freak out. So he plays it off cool.

“ Really Lou?

“ Yes you know how bad my back has been aching lately“

“ Fine, it’s not like you are going to win anyway.“

“ Those are fighting words Harold and what about if you win?“

“ Not if but When I win, you my friend will have to peel and eat an entire avocado !“

Louis rolls his eyes dropping his head backwards totally deflated.

“ What is wrong with you lad? You just couldn’t play a nice friendly game of betting could ya? You had to overstep the mark and bring those hideous fucking green pieces of shit into it. They really do piss me off those avocados“

“ Yes, I’m well aware. I’ve heard that a million times already. What’s the problem thou Lou, scared you are gonna lose?“

“ Oh, you are on!“

Halfway through the race, Harry knows his sitting comfortably to win. There was no way he was going to let Louis win today because the last thing he needs is to be placing his hands all over Louis’s back.

It’s the final stretch of the race and Harry is starting to get nervous as he sees Louis right on his tail. He hits the petal harder and Harry can not fathom what is happening. Louis overtakes him bypassing the checked flag.

“ Oi Oi …things never change Haz, you’re still a loser !“

Harry hasn’t reacted to Louis’s celebratory outburst as he sits staring blankly at the screen. Louis notices Harry’s behaviour and quickly questions him as to what is wrong.

This seems to snap him out of his trance, standing up out of his seat to congratulate him.

“ Nothing it’s fine. Um…Good job well done. “

Louis isn’t stupid, he noticed Harry’s change of tune. He decides to throw some banter to lighten the mood but he doesn’t realise that it’s only adding to Harry’s concern.

“ What’s a matter haz, you having a tantrum cos you lost or are you just speechless at the thought of having to rub those big hands of yours into my muscles huh?“ Louis laughs and Harry internally screams

He remembers to play it off deciding to just bite back and try to not ponder on it too much in hopes that Louis will just forget about the stupid massage.

“ I’m dreading having to go anywhere near you actually, you bloody stink“

“ Harry! I don’t- “

Louis stops mid-sentence lifting up his arm to smell his armpit. He shakes his head scrunching up his nose.

“ Ok so maybe I do a little bit, don’t worry sunshine I will shower when we get back“ Louis jokes nudging Harry as they move towards the air hockey table.

Harry desperately wants to change the topic of conversation and for the life of him, he has no idea why his first thought was to bring up their wives.

“ Have you heard from Elly?“

“ Once this morning actually. She sent a picture of a Gucci bag. Like I thought she would have learnt by now not to show me that crap. “

“ I literally don’t know what to say. Did you reply“

“ Fucking oath I did. I told her she was sending us broke on her quest to look rich“.

Harry laughs as he places the puck onto the table. They continue talking for a few minutes before the determination to win, took over the both of them.

Louis wins the first round and he knows Harry’s getting serious about going for the win when he pulls out a hair tie from his pocket tying his hair up into a bun to get it out of his way. Harry tries not to concentrate on Louis’s tongue that is resting on the outside of his mouth on his top lip as he tries to concentrate.

When Harry glances at the clock seeing it’s getting close to dinner time, he suggests heading home to grab a bite. Louis is not one to pass up a meal therefore they both head home. Harry offers to cook and after Louis makes a joke about potentially contracting food poisoning Harry laughs and orders a pizza instead.

While Harry spends time in the kitchen organising the plates Louis searches for something to watch. Miraculously he falls upon a movie about two male best friends who fall in love and for some unknown reason to everyone but himself he decides it’s the perfect thing to watch.

When Harry arrives back in the room and notices he has already chosen a movie he takes the opportunity to give him some shit about it.

“ NO Louis just no! Whatever it is, it’s a no. I’m not watching no horror with you again, not if your gonna cry about it later on“

Louis folds his arms across his chest tilting his head to the side as he sarcastically remarks back.

“ For your information, it’s not a horror it’s some romance shit I thought you would like. Dunno what it’s about, I didn’t read the description“ He lies.

Harry sits next to him as they both lean forward grabbing a slice of the pepperoni pizza. Pressing play Louis feels a little nervous. There are questions he wanted to ask Harry but hasn’t been able to bring himself to do it. He hopes that watching this movie may give him any clues about what he wants to know.

15 minutes in and the storyline is well and truly out there and Harry is just staring, not once taking his eyes off the screen while he nibbles at his bottom lip nervously.

Louis keeps glancing at Harry every few minutes hoping for something, for anything that will give away how he feels about the movie but there’s nothing, not a single clue even.

Louis can pretty much guarantee that this is the first time in history that they have watched a movie together in total silence. Then about halfway through…. it happens.

A sex scene.

Louis’s eyes quickly flicker towards him as he notices Harry moving a little, re-adjusting himself. He hears Harry inhale and exhale rather sharply and Louis decides it’s now or never. He makes the bold decision to speak, but the words that come out were not entirely what he had expected would leave his mouth.

“ I’ve been so sexually deprived for so long now I wouldn’t even knock back some man-on-man action“

Louis chuckles quietly before he stops abruptly when he realises exactly what it is that he has just said.

Harry’s head couldn’t have turned any faster if it tried.

“ What?“ Harry asks trying to distinguish whether there was any truth to his last sentence.

“ C’mon Harry. Like you wouldn’t either if you were like me and hadn’t had any action for a while. I mean it can’t be that much different right?“

Harry gulps. He knows what it is that he wants to reply with but debates about whether telling him will impact their friendship. Harry looks to Louis who is already for some reason staring back waiting for his response. Harry moves his eyes to the floor.

“ There’s not too much difference actually especially if you are a top. Bottoming however is a different story. “

Louis’s heart rate increases and finally he is happy that he is getting somewhere. He doesn’t want this conversation to end yet so he pushes it further.

“ How do you know that, been watching gay porn or something?“

Harry is starting to not only feel uncomfortable but nervous. He thinks deeply for a few seconds. This is Louis who he has been best friends with for many years. His rock, his happy place, his everything. He decides now is the time to just tell him.

“ From experience actually “

Louis pauses the movie.

“ Shut the front door !!!“ He yells.

Harry confused looks back towards his front door.

“ It is closed. “

Louis laughs.

“ Harry no you silly goose it’s an expression…anyway back to it, why have I not known this information? “

Harry is still 50/50 on whether to inform him of the whole story. He feels his heart tug a little and he takes it as a sign to proceed. Ok here goes nothing.

“ You were not aware because, although I trust you with my life and love you dearly, I wasn’t exactly sure how you would react to me admitting I was bi-sexual let alone explain that I’ve had sex with a man. “

Louis is shook. His mouth has dropped wide open and he is speechless. There are no words to describe how anxious Harry is at this moment in time. He feels a little glad that he finally got that off his chest but with Louis still not saying anything he starts to clam up worried he has made the wrong decision.

“ Well …erm….shit“

That’s it. That’s all that Louis replies with before facing back towards the TV and pressing play. Harry doesn’t know what to do. He just sits there feeling completely embarrassed.

The old saying goes that if you are in an awkward situation, you should always feel comfortable enough to walk away.

That is exactly what Louis does. He rises to his feet not daring to Look Harry’s way and tears off down the corridor exiting out the front door.

“ Fuck “ Harry whispers to himself.

Sometimes we can attach ourselves so strongly to people that when they walk away, a little piece of yourself follows them, leaving an empty space that can’t be replaced.

Harry is determined not to cry. He took a gamble and feels he has lost. He never thought Louis would have just upped and abandoned him like that. He can’t move. It’s not like he doesn’t want to, it’s the fact he can’t. His pretty sure his in shock.

His heart is hurting in a way that it has never experienced before. He feels his hands start trembling as he starts to wonder whether that is it. Five years of friendship suddenly down the drain. It’s a crazy thought how someone who used to be a huge part of your life can be gone in an instant.

Harry starts hyperventilating as the thought of losing Louis forever dawns on him. He continues staring at the screen not paying attention to the movie anymore.

He doesn’t know how long he has been sitting there until he hears his front door open and close again.

Louis appears before him sitting down on the floor in front of him. Louis can tell straight away that Harry is upset.

“ What’s wrong, what happened?“

“Please tell me you are joking right?”

Louis lifts his eyebrows confused about what the fuck is happening.

“ Lou, I came out to you and you barely said a word and then proceeded to stand up and leave with no explanation. Do have any idea how you just made me feel“

Louis is surprised at his words and apologises immediately.

“ Harry I’m so freaking sorry. I’m pretty sure I did tell you I was leaving. …shit maybe I thought it in my head but didn’t say it out loud. Oh fuck. Shit hazza I’m so sorry. You know I do that sometimes accidentally “

And Louis is right. He does have a habit here and there of thinking he has said something when he had only thought it instead. Louis gets to his knees leaning forward to wrap him into a hug.

“ Come here “

Harry can feel tears building in his eyes but he doesn’t care because this time, it’s from relief, not sadness.

“ I thought that I thought. You know, that you may have left me “ He finally stumbles out.

“ I would never do that Harry. Ever. “

Harry looks him up and down noting the change of clothes.

“ Why did you leave anyway?“

Louis shakes his wet hair and takes off his tee shirt. Harry wipes his hand across his mouth trying not to react to the godly sight in front of him.

“ Went home to take a shower, you didn’t think I’d forget my massage did you?“

Harry chokes on his own saliva.

At first contact, Louis jumps at the feeling of Harry’s cold hands. When Harry grips his shoulders Louis flinches a little at the strength at which was applied.

“ This is too hard for me to do sitting on the couch while you are on the floor. I should just stop“. Harry pleads.

“ No, please. Don’t…. Here. “

Louis grabs one of the lounge cushions to act as a pillow and repositions himself to lay on his stomach on the rug that is placed on the floor.

“ There. Fixed. Now you can just sit over me if you like, it will certainly make it easier.“ Louis says his voice muffled from being pressed to the ground.

Poor Harry is trapped in his own worst nightmare.

He places his legs over each side of him and bends down onto his knees. He leans back to rest on his own feet as he straddles him.

Louis starts trying to fidget around in his pocket, which is difficult to do considering the position he is in. He pulls out a small bottle handing it to Harry.

“Before I forget, this might be better.”

Harry examines the bottle and opens it up when he identifies it as massage oil.

Thankfully Louis cannot witness Harry lift his head up staring at the ceiling, praying to the gods above for any type of help.

But unfortunately for Harry, the plead to be saved never arrives.

Succumbed to defeat, Harry opens the bottle drizzling the oil over Louis’s entire back. Louis’s whole body shivers.

“ Fucking hell, that’s freezing!“

Harry can’t help but laugh at Louis’s outburst before lowering his hands and rubbing small hard circles around his shoulder blades. Harry applies some pressure using his thumbs to glide up his spine and then it happens. The one thing Harry was hoping wouldn’t happen.

Louis moans.

Harry swallows deeply and continues to move his hands around his back. He knows he must be doing something right when Louis continues letting out sounds that Harry could only wish were coming from an entirely different scenario.

“ Oh, that feels so good. Omg Haz harder, fuck that’s the spot. “

Old lady, puppies, work. Harry is desperately trying to think of absolutely anything besides the delicate tanned soft skin that is making his stomach feel stuff that he knew was not appropriate.

Getting lost in his thoughts Harry hasn’t realised his massage has turned into a slow sensual caress as he softly runs his fingers around his back.

When he finally realises what he has done he stops. Harry is frozen and Louis hasn’t moved or said anything either. Harry’s breath hitches and he certainly is not ready for what Louis does next.

In one fast motion, Louis quickly rolls around onto his back not leaving Harry any time to move away, retrospectively leaving Harry straddling his lap.

He doesn’t say anything. Both men focus their eyes on each other. Louis’s gaze comes across as needy as Harry is lost in Louis’s blue seductive eyes.

There’s a lot of conversation being exchanged just not with words, but rather reading each other through their eyes.

It’s then Harry feels something. Glancing down he sees both their crotches are perfectly aligned.

There’s a flash of fear that appears on Harry’s face as he slowly tries to lift himself away but is stopped promptly by Louis’s hands on his hips keeping him in place.

Starring deeply into Louis’s eyes he sees something. It’s hidden but it’s definitely there.

Lust.

Should he or shouldn’t he? That is the question waiting to be answered. He doesn’t know if it’s the right choice, but he will soon enough.

As Green still meets blue Harry turns to the side picking up the oil and pouring it into his palm. Rubbing his hands together he leans forward placing both hands onto his chest. Louis inhales sharply as Harry waits for a sign to continue.

The moment Louis bites the corner of his bottom lip Harry moves his hands all over his torso. When his hands fall below his navel reaching the top of Louis’s pants Harry stills.

Louis leans his head back a little muffling out a moan as he tilts his hips gently connecting their groins. Noticing Louis is hard as a rock Harry pushes down slightly and begins to softly rock creating some friction.

Feeling Louis’s cock under him Harry couldn’t be more in a state of excitement if he tried. He starts to work up a faster rhythm essentially dry humping him, and even though there are clothes separating them neither seem to mind as the pleasure continues to grow rapidly.

Hearing Harry start panting as he begins to circulate his hips around down onto him, is starting to drive Louis over the edge.

Harry’s movements are causing him to perspire. He rips his own shirt off and the moment Louis lays his eyes on Harry’s bare chest he pushes Harry back gently and quickly stands to his feet.

For the second time tonight, Louis rushes to leave without saying a single word.

When Louis closes his front door he collapses to the ground leaning his back against the wall. He didn’t want to run, his scared but not regretful. He didn’t want to leave but he had to.

As he places his hand over his groin his ashamed. He feels the wet patch. Harry has made him cum with only foreplay and Louis has never been so embarrassed. There was no way he was going to let Harry see that.

Louis keeps replaying every moment over and over until a smile forms. Louis is fucking happy because Louis likes Harry. Louis ………wants Harry.

Meanwhile, Harry does nothing but think that he has just totally fucked everything up.

Louis feels guilty because Louis……… has a secret. There’s something he wants to tell Harry because he knows he has hurt him but he can’t seem to bring himself to do it.

How does he tell his best friend that he lied? Well not so much a lie but deliberately broke his heart.

Louis wants to tell him that he remembers the kiss. He wants to tell him that he knew it was Harry. He wants to tell him he wanted the kiss and he most surely wants to tell him that he loved it.

What he doesn’t want to admit is the panic that struck him the moment their lips connected. He didn’t know how Harry would react and it terrified him. The butterflies he felt didn’t help either and it scared the living shit out of him.

Not knowing what to do he decided that letting Harry think he thought it was Elly was his way out of having to explain the kiss.

Thinking the same things, both men lay in bed that night with the realization that things will never be the same again, which is perfectly ok because both Harry and Louis have never felt more alive.

When you look into your best friend’s eyes with so much love that your soul feels it….the bromance line… has well and truly been crossed.

A/N

Thoughts?

Chapter 7 - Fun Times

It’s so hard pretending to just be friends with someone, when every time you look at them, all you see, is everything you have always wanted.

There are two types of reasons why people won’t address a sensitive issue.

1. It doesn’t mean Anything to them. Or
2. It means Everything to them.

Although Harry and Louis are getting along really well with neither of them hiding away from each other, the elephant in the room regarding their little rendezvous 2 nights ago has continued to go un-spoken about. It’s not like each of them has forgotten about it or regretted it, they just have no idea on how to approach it, scared of hearing how the other may feel.

Until today…………….

Real friends don’t get offended when you insult them. They smile and call you something even more offensive.

“Are you sure you are not Irish? , I mean you are literally the height of a leprechaun!”

Harry dangles the chocolate bar above Louis’s head just enough that he can’t reach it. In an attempt at jumping to swipe it, Harry laughs hysterically when he watches him still have trouble grabbing it.

Louis punches Harry in the stomach playfully which prompts him to lower his arms, resulting in Louis snatching the snickers bar.

“ And what are you then Harold? An oversized giraffe? Screw you! Don’t mess with my chocolate, you know that one’s my favourite. That’s the last one I have!!!“ Touch it again you clumsy Giselle and I will not hesitate to throw you in the water.“

As Harry watches him unwrap the packet he tries not to show his devious smirk as he conducts his evil plan.

It’s an odd occasion in London for the weather to be so pleasant. The sun is beaming and the temperature is at an all time high of 30 degrees. Which is a lot for the English climate.

Harry grips the bottom of his singlet pulling it up and over his head dropping it to the ground. He wasn’t entirely sure if it would work but it most certainly does.

While Louis sinks his teeth into the chocolate bar, Harry moves closer to him noticing that Louis has stopped chewing and his eyes are panning all across his torso.

“ Lou?“

“ Mhmm?“ Louis answers but his gaze is still upon Harry’s tattoos.

“ Have a nice swim“

“Wha-”

Louis doesn’t get to finish as Harry grabs his arms forcefully pushing him towards the pool’s edge. Now that Louis is well aware of what’s happening, there’s an amusing childish struggle between the two before Louis’s strength finally breaks through. Securing his hands on Harry’s waist he drags him into the water as they both tumble in, both a laughing mess.

“Harry look what you have done you little shit !!! What a fucking waste of a snickers. That’s tragic.”

Harry points as he giggles at Louis’s chocolate covered face.

“ and it’s all over your mouth and cheeks too. That’s bloody hilarious!!!“

“ No, haz it’s not…. waste…nothing but a waste, I should insist to make you clean it up!“

Without thinking it properly through considering what had happened the other night, Harry who is extremely close to Louis in the pool slowly lifts his thumb and index finger to hold Louis’s chin firmly in place. He moves forward staring into Louis’s eyes.

If you tried listening hard enough, the sound of both heartbeats could be heard from the anticipation.

In what may have looked like slow motion but wasn’t, Harry sticks his tongue out, delicately licking up the chocolate from Louis’s chin all the way up to his cheekbone, slowly brushing slightly against the side of his lip in the process.

Harry felt Louis shiver and even if that could have been from him shaking from the cold water, Harry chooses to believe otherwise.

“ Is that better ?“

Louis doesn’t reply he just smiles but Harry understands that smile, it’s not one out of happiness but out of nervousness and concern.

He has been itching to have the conversation. He wants to know how Louis feels but he didn’t want to be the one to bring it up. He didn’t want to sound pushy so letting Louis come to him seemed like the only way to go.

With Louis not having mentioned it at all, there’s a sudden build up of courage forming deep within Harry’s chest. We all have an unsuspected reserve of strength inside of us, finding it and expelling it requires a whole lot of braveness.

“ Lou about the other night I -…..“

Louis shakes his head ‘no’ and sidesteps around him jumping out of the pool. Harry feels the familiar burn of pain that has settled in his heart. He doesn’t want to end the day like this. He doesn’t want that awkwardness back. So he decides that pushing it further is what’s definitely needed.

Exiting the water he walks over to the pergola where Louis is currently drying himself off with a towel. His back is turned away from him and while his head is telling him to just stop and let it all just take its course, his heart just won’t allow it.

Moving slowly up behind an unsuspecting Louis he positions himself as close as he can to his back as he speaks so softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

“ Please talk to me. “

Louis can sense Harry’s body inches from his own. He wouldn’t dare deny how feeling Harry’s breath that is hitting his back is causing him all sorts of electricity that’s flowing throughout him.

Avoiding this conversation had been easy but now being in Louis’s back yard there was nowhere to escape he was already home.

“ I really don’t know what it is that you want me to say, Harry.“

Harry frowns as he bites his thumbnail trying to gather up something to say. Louis fixes his fringe making sure to direct his eyes around the yard, anywhere but towards Harry.

“ Well, let’s start with this. Do you regret what happened?“

“ No“

“ Did you enjoy it?“

“ HARRY!“ There’s a red blush that appears over Louis’s cheek.

“What it’s a fair question.”

Louis lets out a big sigh letting his sight finally fall on Harry. He hesitates at first and there’s an awkward silence that forms with the only sound being heard coming from a couple of birds tweeting away in the big old tree.

“I’m married, Harry. I kinda feel like I’ve cheated and I know how you feel about Lexi so it probably doesn’t matter to you as it does to me, unlike you I actually love my wife Harry.”

The moment the words leave his mouth Louis wishes he could take them back especially noticing Harrys new found sad demeanour.

When Love is real it doesn’t lie, cheat or make you feel invaluable. True love eases worries, it shouldn’t create them. Harry doesn’t like the way Louis is feeling so guilty. Starting to sense Louis’s regret, Harry’s mind fills with panic about losing Louis. But how can he, when he was never his, to begin with.

“ I’m sorry Louis. I get it, you didn’t like it. It won’t happen again I promise…. Just …I beg of you please Lou….. don’t …..don’t run from me. “

Harry goes to hug Louis but pulls back deciding against it. The last thing he wants to do is make him uncomfortable once again. Harry gives a small half-hearted smile because let’s face it, the realization has surely just come to light that he will never have Louis in the way that he wants and wanting him that way was something he really needed to hurry up and get out of his system.

Not caring now that he was still wet Harry pulls his shirt back on and picks up his phone and keys off the outdoor dining table. Turning to leave he feels Louis grab him by the wrist.

“ I never said I didn’t like it Haz.“

Harry grabs Louis’s arm taking it off of his letting Louis’s arm drop down, falling back to his side. For the first time ever it’s Harry who walks out on Louis.

---

One hour is all it took until Harry’s phone started to ding.

From Louis: “ I’m really sorry. I don’t want you upset with me. I apologise H, I’m giving you mixed signals and fuck I, I really don’t know what to do because….look if I’m honest I did like it ok. I liked it a lot. Way more than I’d care to admit. It’s just I keep thinking of Elly and ….“

The moment Harry sees her name he throws his phone to the other side of the couch not bothering to finish reading it.

Over the next several hours his phone dings consistently but he continues to ignore it. Fed up with the lack of anything good to watch on the t.v, he decides to take a shower to rid himself of the chlorine smell from earlier on. He pulls on a pair of yellow shorts and makes his way to the kitchen. Opening up the fridge he realises that it’s almost dead empty. With the current mood he is in, he would rather stay home and go hungry than venture out anywhere.

With nothing else to do, he finds himself lounging down back into the same spot as he was before. He glances at his phone and gives in to temptation. Opening up his notifications as expected, they are all from the beauty next door.

There’s a mixture of messages. Some with a simple ’ sorry’ some saying ‘this feels horrible I hate not talking’ and then he sees one that catches his eye.

From Louis: “ Can you please come over at 6.30 pm? I tried to make your favourite pasta dish. I can’t promise it will be any good cos I will confess it looks like a proper train wreck. I need to see you H. I will understand if you don’t come and I will give you some space for a few days.“

Glancing at the clock he notices it’s 7.50 pm. He scrolls down to another message.

From Louis: (received 7.02 pm) “ Dam….. :( the pasta sucked anyway. It was a stupid idea. I’m gonna head out for a nice night walk, hope you’re ok. Goodnight bubbles X “

Harry’s heart melts when he sees the pet name. Louis hasn’t called him that in years. A very long time ago Harry had become so drunk on a night out that when they had returned home that evening while pouring himself a new drink he had mistaken dishwashing liquid for champagne.

Louis who had been waiting outside at the time was greeted with an incoherent Harry who couldn’t stop burping out bubbles. Louis laughed so hard that night that he vomited all over the grass out of pure pain in his belly from the amount of laughing he had conducted.

Harry has never moved so fast as he jumps up and runs to his room. He grabs his jeans and jacket out of his closet rushing to get dressed while trying to call Louis at the same time but his phone goes straight to voicemail.

Just as he tries to call again he receives an Instagram notification from Louis who had just posted seconds ago. Looking closely at the selfie he zooms in to read the building’s neon sign illuminating in the background. “ Bluebirds“ Harry’s mouth drops open. What the fuck was Louis doing at a gay bar?

---

Louis Downs another shot, as quick as he orders another.

“ Same as last time?“ The bartender asks.

“ Yepp“

The bald headed much older man slides the double strength vodka shot glass along the bar.

Louis feels a hand on his shoulder.

“ Wanna dance?“

“For fuck sakes Luke, you know I can’t dance” Louis laughs.

Of course, there was nothing funny to laugh at but the amount of alcohol he had already consumed was starting to go to his head.

Luke an old school friend of Louis had bumped into him on his evening stroll. Having not seen each other in over 10 years, Luke asked Louis to join him for a ‘quiet’ drink. How different that scenario had turned out.

Louis was oblivious at first not paying attention to the fact that the establishment they had entered was a gay bar. It took 3 men approaching him and asking to buy him a drink before he finally sussed out his surroundings.

It made him laugh actually at the little ironic joke the universe was seemingly playing. Making his way to the dance floor he pats Lukes’s back rather hard gaining his attention from the man he was grinding.

After what seemed like an eternity of dancing but was merely 15 minutes, Luke and Louis return to the bar taking another seat.

“ Hey Lil cutie “

Not again Louis murmurs to himself.

“ I’m gonna have to stop you right there lad, sorry. I’m just not interested. “

When the young man raises his hands in defeat and turns away, Louis turns his head smiling at a laughing Luke.

“ Mr popular tonight aren’t you Lewis“

Louis shakes his head giggling. Luke watches another man walking towards them and the moment he places a hand on Louis’s shoulder he witnesses Louis roll his eyes not bothering to even address the man so he decides to help him out.

“ Sorry mate, he is taken he’s mine tonight.“ Luke plants a kiss to the side of Louis’s face.

“ I can see that….“

Louis chokes on his drink accidentally dribbling some out his mouth at the sound of the deep husky voice. He spins around watching the back of Harry who is disappearing into the crowd.

“ Harry !!“ He screams out to no avail.

“ Who’s Harry? You know him?“

“ Fuck!!!“

Ignoring his question Louis immediately steps down off the stool wobbling a little at the state of his intoxication. It takes him longer than he’d like to, to finally spot him, noticing him enter the bathroom.

By the time he makes it to the door, Harry is already walking out.

“ Harr,y what are you doing here?“

“ I could ask you the same thing“ he replies pushing past him. When Harry is mad he becomes a very fast walker. Louis’s smaller legs are having to move twice as quick to try n catch up.

Following Harry outside he finally gets the chance to step in front of him making him stop.

“ Lou please just move. I only came here to check if you are ok and seems like you are and already have company so I will see you tomorrow.“

“ No. Haz..wait..“

Harry unlocks his car as the two stand in the car parking lot. There’s a loud bang that sounds from the adjacent alleyway making both of them jump and turn in the direction. When Louis looks back Harry is opening up the car door.

“ Harry. It’s not what you think you know.“

“It’s none of my business anyway”

Fed up with Harry’s stern abrasiveness he grabs Harry’s arm.

“ Harry stop, please. “

Harry who continues to stare at the ground with his hands in his pocket hears the club’s loud metal door bang close.

“ Someone is waiting for you“

Louis turns his head to see Luke waiting by the door.

“ I will call you later “ Louis shouts out as Luke waves back in acknowledgement returning through the door.

Louis hears Harry scoff and tries to get in the car. Louis stops him again.

“ For god’s sake, his an old friend I bumped into that’s it. How could you think I would do that when I’m having enough trouble trying my hardest not to fall in love with you“.

Alcohol: Temporary fun with permanent consequences. Some things in life are better left unsaid. Louis still hasn’t learnt that when getting drunk, that does not give you the right to say them anyway.

Louis has no idea what he has just confessed. Harry has no idea what to say or do because he sees that Louis doesn’t realise he has said it.

“ I don’t wanna fight haz…shit will you just hurry up and take me to bed already“

Harry’s eyes widen in shock.

“ Excuse me“ Harry asks as Lou looks dumbfounded.

“ What? ….I’m tired“

Harry lets out a sigh of relief now understanding what he really meant. Opening the door for him Harry stands there making sure he puts his seatbelt on. Driving along Louis suddenly has a thought.

“ Hey hey hey, how the fuck did u know where I was tonight? “

Harry can’t help but laugh at Louis’s playfulness.

“ A magician never reveals his secrets“

Louis lowers his hand slapping Harry’s thigh jokingly as he then lets his head lean against the window closing his eyes.

“ Just keep driving Harold“

Harry does just that, but it’s hard to concentrate when Louis has left his hand resting on his thigh.

Driving along all Harry can think about is what Louis said earlier.

’ trying my hardest not to fall in love with you’

He knows it was just the alcohol, probably just a slip of the tongue or even something out of context as he was in no state to think properly. But then something pops into his mind. An old saying which he wonders if just maybe could be applicable.

’ A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts’ .

Harry smiles to himself as he pulls into the driveway. He doesn’t want to get his hopes up and he has just realised an unhealthy pattern. The only time he gets any answers out of Louis is when his drinking, when his full of dutch courage and he doesn’t like the sound of that one little bit. So tomorrow he is going to bring up their situation again….but this time it won’t be with any words …but actions.

He shakes Louis gently.

“ Lou wake up were home“

Without moving Louis replies.

“ Shut up Harry I’m awake, it’s just my eyes that are asleep“

Harry laughs.

“What? Never mind, C’mon. “

---

Harry leads Louis into his bedroom making sure he doesn’t hurt himself along the way. As Louis collapses down into his bed Harry smirks at the sudden Deja-Vu he is now experiencing.

“Cuddle me til I sleep?”

Harry who is tired himself doesn’t even have the energy to fight against himself about whether he should or not, lays down next to him. Facing him all he can smell is the strong scent of alcohol. Harry can’t help but close his dreary eyes. He feels Louis shuffle a little and freezes.

The most wonderful feeling he felt last week is once again gracing him. Louis’s lips are pressed to his in the most precious tender kiss. It’s longer this time and a lot slower and gentle. Both their lips are just lingering pressed tight as though both not wanting to pull away losing the contact, wanting to store the feeling deep in their memories.

Harry’s heart is racing he can feel that anxious pain return in his chest as he dreads what’s coming next. He’s been here before and he can’t believe that his here in this situation once again. ‘No this can’t be happening not again’ Harry pleads to himself.

Louis is the first to break contact. He rolls away from Harry, reaching back to lift Harry’s arm wrapping it around his tiny waist, the 2 comfortably now spooning.

There’s a moment of panic for Haz when Louis softly speaks.

“ Goodnight……

silence

…………….Harry“.

A/N

Thoughts on chapter?

☆☆ QUESTION:

Who is ready for Larry to start hooking up or should I drag it out a little further?

Let me know in the comments.

As always please remember to vote comment and share ♡

Chapter 8 - New beginnings

There are some people who could sit and listen to you speak a thousand words but still not understand you. However , sometimes you may be lucky enough to come across someone in your life who will completely understand you, even if you haven’t spoken a single word.

Harry and Louis seem to have an unspoken Agreement. There is a silent understanding that has taken place between the two, yet no words have escaped either of their mouths.

During the day, life seems to go on like normal. Day in and day out, the men are making the most of their free time keeping themselves extremely busy with lots of spontaneous activities. For instance yesterday the lads entertained themselves with a somewhat competitive round of golf. While today was spent wine tasting on a vineyard tour in the English countryside.

When night time falls, there’s a significant shift in the atmosphere.

Harry was so sure of wanting to bring up their ‘issue’ once again but after Louis kissed him the other night fully aware that it was him, he realised that you don’t always have to have a plan or understand everything. Sometimes you just need to let go, have faith, and see where things lead you.

So it makes sense that Louis doesn’t question Harry when he follows him into his bedroom to go to sleep.

As with Louis, Harry doesn’t question why Louis has made it a habit of making sure to kiss him tenderly on the lips before cuddling into him every night.

There’s no awkwardness or shyness anymore, to them it’s starting to feel natural…. somewhat…. comfortable.

But when the sun rises all events from the night before are suddenly swept away, never acknowledged, and certainly never discussed. Whatever happens in the dark, stays in the dark.

Best friends by day, lovers by night?

Harry doesn’t mind though because finally, Louis is allowing him to feel that little bit of sensual comfort that he has always desired. To be close to him, to touch him, caress him in a way he had only ever once dreamed of.

Louis has missed Elly’s presence in the bedroom so much over the last few months, that cuddling Harry feels like a gap that was missing within him has now been substantially fulfilled.

This new routine that they have established has only been like this for the last 3 days and yet Louis is already trying to work out why it is that when Harry’s hands wrap around him, he falls asleep in a heartbeat.

Surprisingly Louis went easy on the wine today which was great to see. Both are tipsy of course but they have themselves completely under control.

“ Another glass ?“ The young gentleman offers them never taking his eyes off of Harry. Louis takes note of the smirk Harry offers the man in return. Louis is definitely not liking what he is seeing.

“ No thank you, we were just about to leave“ Louis intervenes.

“ We were ?“ Harry asks confused as he swore Louis had only stated a few minutes prior that he wanted 1 more round before leaving.

Wasting no time. He stands up from the bar stool collectively placing his jacket back on as Harry watches on.

“ You ok Lou?“

“ Mhmm. I’m fine. You ready or what?“

Harry follows behind as they exit out the cellar door. Harry throws Louis his car keys.

“ Open it up and wait here, I left my wallet on the bar. I will be right back.“

Turning around Harry proceeds quickly to walk back into the establishment as Louis makes himself comfortable in the front seat.

10 minutes. A whole 10 minutes and Harry hasn’t returned. Louis is getting restless and concerned. Deciding that going to find him was the logical thing to do, he locks Harry’s car and returns inside in his search to locate him.

Upon entry the bar they were sitting at is empty and Harry is nowhere in sight. Looking around the room he notices he isn’t in there anywhere. The cellar was near to closing time and everyone had pretty much left before they had decided to leave. He goes to check the restroom and stops in his track.

Louis slaps his hand over his mouth as he hears Harry’s voice.

“ You like that huh? Followed by a slapping sound.

Louis slowly backs out of the restroom trying to be quiet as a mouse. He looks around noticing the bartender was also ‘missing’.

To say Louis was pissed off was an understatement. When he reaches the car he slumps down into the front seat and his emotions are spiralling all over the place.

Harry was currently fucking another man approximately only 20 meters away. Louis shakes his head in disbelief, not knowing whether his upset for Lexi or just sad for himself.

There was no reason for him to be jealous. Harry had told him many times he wanted to move on from Lexi. Harry is a grown man and is free to do as he pleases.

That scared Louis. He couldn’t help but come to the realisation that Harry meant a lot more to him than he initially thought because he didn’t understand where this fire from within was coming from, the aching pain in his chest, the …the jealousy? That was something he had no right to feel because Harry was free to do whoever wants because Harry was undeniably not his.

It’s not until 6 minutes later that Harry finally finds himself getting into the car.

“ So sorry Lou, I ran into an old co-worker. He certainly is a talker.“ Harry smiles as he rushes to put his seatbelt on.

“It’s fine.” Louis replies quietly as he keeps his head turned and focused on looking out the window.

It’s a very quiet drive home and Harry knows Louis is mad. He has made several attempts to talk to him and he has barely had 2 words given to him in return. To Harry, he simply assumes Louis is only mad because he took so long having no idea he had been caught.

Seeing him upset doesn’t sit well with Harry and there’s a slight bit of guilt forming below the surface. Harry doesn’t feel he has done no wrong because technically he hasn’t. He sleeps in the same bed with Lou and in return Louis kisses him but that’s it. It’s never gone further and most likely never will.

Harry has needs. He is a very sexual person who needs to feel connected through sensual stimulation. He likes to be close to someone, needing that sexual outlet. Lexi and Harry had always had a great sex life. They had a lot of sex. No matter how tired, angry, or overworked she was if Harry felt the need for pleasure she was sure to give it. She knew looking after his needs kept their relationship ’ alive’. Lexi’s understanding of this is really the only thing he misses about her.

Having had spent so much time with Louis this last week, Harry who was already over having to wank, saw the opportunity with the bartender and took it. Harry wasn’t fond of him not in the slightest, he was just a fuck. A release. A release from all the built up sexual tension that Louis causes him.

For the entire morning while wine tasting Harry was having trouble watching Louis. The way his ass gently sways while he walks, the way he licked his lips after every swig from the glass, the way Louis’s soft delicate hands touched his own. It was all too much for him to take. Louis had been making him unbearably horny all day long. He needed a release and he found one.

“We still on for the movie tonight?”

Harry pulls into the driveway turning off the engine. Without looking his way Louis answers Harry in a tone he wasn’t expecting.

“ Forget it. I’m going home.“

Louis opens his door hurrying to get out. Harry moves just as fast not wanting him to leave without an explanation.

“ Lou C’mon, I get you are mad that I made you wait, I’m sorry I really am. Don’t let this ruin the rest of our plans. You really wanted to see that marvel movie“.

Louis lets out a large sigh turning to face him.

“ I need to work on my book Harry, I’ve spent every spare second I can in your company. I’m not getting holiday pay like you. “

Harry stands shocked staring at Louis having no words to respond with. Harry isn’t going to deny the sting to the heart he just felt, that his words have just caused.

“ See you tomorrow“

Louis strides away crossing over into his own yard. It takes a few moments for Harry to process what he had just said.

Tomorrow? Wait what?

Harry lifts his head up pulling himself out of his thoughts in an attempt to call out to Lou when he sees his front door being shut. “ What the fuck is happening?“ He quietly asked himself.

Harry spends the rest of the afternoon and evening catching up on housework. With Lexi away, the house has become on the too-messy side of things and decides to just get it done so it’s out of the way. He mopped the floors, washed the dishes, made his bed, dusted and cleaned the bathroom.

By the time he has finished and showered Harry is proud of himself for the amount of work, he has completed. It would be a little more rewarding if he knew he had cleaned so much cos he had to, and not because he only needed the distraction.

After such a long day the bed was calling Harry’s name a lot earlier than normal. His belly is full, his relaxed from the shower, he has had his nightly cup of tea and has brushed his teeth. There’s no reason for all the tossing and turning that’s happening in his bed. He can’t get comfortable. He cannot settle. As he lays staring at the ceiling he realises that maybe it’s because he parted bad ways with Louis and it’s stressing him out.

He leans to his bedside table reaching for his phone. Pulling out the charger cable he opens up his message screen.

To Louis: “ I don’t like how we left things today. I’m really sorry Lou. Hope you got some writing done. Have a good sleep. “

Harry deletes the last part that said ’ I miss you’ not wanting to admit how much his absence really was affecting him.

He receives an instant reply which he was most certainly not expecting.

To Harry: “ Good night.“

He was hoping now he has spoken to him it would have made him feel settled and less on edge but something still doesn’t feel right.

He frowns as he puts the phone down and rolls over stretching out his arms. It’s this action that prompts the realization. The message from Louis can’t help him feel better because that wasn’t the problem.

He rubs his hand along the cold sheet next to him. Unlike the previous nights from this last week, tonight beside him… the bed is empty. Louis’s cold toes are not buried into his legs, there’s no small body laying snuggled up beside him, and he can’t smell, taste, hear or touch him.

He doesn’t feel complete that’s what it is. Having had him share a bed all week Harry doesn’t believe how in such a short time he has got accustomed to not being without him.

When two souls finally connect at the highest of levels, there’s nothing on earth that can prevent them from the intense craving of desire and longing, no matter where each one of them may be located.

Louis is not having a easy time either as he returns to look into the kitchen fridge out of boredom for what feels like the 100th time. He keeps replaying over and over the words he heard Harry say in the restroom.

Knowing some random man got to feel Harry and experience the pleasure from him is seething because it has now smacked Louis right in the face that he wants to be the one to experience that. He doesn’t like the idea of anyone else touching him. He wants to be touched by him so badly that the next time he sees him he is going to let Harry know very clearly that he wants to fool around. Exciting as it felt, he also was feeling a tad guilty as visions of Elly consumed his mind.

Although it’s already 11.50 pm he decides to lay in bed flipping through his socials. The moment he opens Instagram he sees a picture of Elly in times square. He smiles at her happy face and he is glad she’s visiting a place she had always wanted to go. He does truly miss her but right now……… he misses Harry more.

---

Louis waits 2 days until Saturday to see Harry. He had suggested they resume their movie ‘date’ and have a few drinks. For once Harry is wanting Louis to become intoxicated in hopes of him talking and opening up. He hates himself for wanting that but there’s no other way he tried. Without dutch courage, Louis is confined in his shell.

“ Tickets please“

Harry hands the Lady the tickets and reaches into his wallet.

“ Would you like some pop c- “

“ LUKEY !!!!!!!“ Louis shouts.

Spinning around to see where Louis’s eyes are focused he sees Luke approaching them giving Louis a tight squeeze.

“ Thanks for inviting me“ He winks and Harry cannot believe what his hearing. Not seeing Lou for 2 days, he was excited to spend time together …alone but obviously, Louis had plans of his own.

“ Harry this is my old mate Luke, Luke this is Harry my ……….best friend. “

He can’t help but take in lukes features. A good looking lad, with dark hair, tall, muscular and a face that could entice anybody in. Let’s just say Harry was wishing Luke didn’t exist let alone stand right here before him.

“ Nice to meet ya didn’t know you were coming.“

Harry emphasises on the last part as he glares towards a smirking Louis.

“ Oh Harry, I remember you, yeah ah sorry about the whole piss off Louis is taken thing, he was being bombarded with propositions and I was only trying to help him out.“

Louis wraps his arm around Lukes’s shoulder using his other arm to rub his fist into Lukes’s head.

“ Always my saviour!!“

Louis doesn’t see the way Harry rolls his eyes and Harry doesn’t notice the grin Louis can’t contain when he notices Harry’s stern reaction to seeing an unexpected visitor.

Louis and Luke Mumble quietly to each other as they stroll together towards the cinema door, leaving a fucked off Harry to silently follow.

Louis has deliberately placed himself between the two men with the full intention of splitting his attention equally. It doesn’t work and Harry has had enough of them fucking about throughout the whole movie. There are only 4 other people in the room who don’t seem to be too interested in the movie so they are not fazed by the noise escaping from Louis and Luke.

Watching Louis throw Lukes’s popcorn into his mouth out of his peripheral vision was the breaking point for Harry. He lets out a loud sigh gaining Louis’s attention.

“ You ok there Haz?“

“ I dunno, you guys want some alone time or what? I’m happy to leave.“

Harry stands grabbing his belongings and walks out of the room discarding his soda into the provided bin on the way out. Harry leaves the venue and returns home.

Luke turns to Louis and smiles.

“ You think it worked?“

“ Absolutely!“

Seeing Harry jealous over Luke made Louis feel good…. but that feeling didn’t last long. He was glad that Harry reacted that way and that he got to witness him feel that same bit of hurt and pain that he had to endure the other day with the bartender. But he didn’t allow for himself to feel the unplanned embarrassment and regret that had followed after his actions.

Louis had asked Luke to come along and flirt. Having known him since kindergarten Luke didn’t need a back story or reasonings of ‘why’ he simply did as Louis requested with no questions asked.

Knowing Harry had gone home, Louis thanked Luke by shouting him to a few drinks at the local pub. A few drinks who are we trying to kid here? Louis stayed with Luke til midnight when he then said his goodbyes to him and parted ways by jumping into a uber home.

‘Knock knock knock’

Harry shuffles around on the lounge rubbing his eyes and picking up his phone to look at the time. He hears Louis before he sees him.

“ Harreehh“

Opening the door Harry is met with an intoxicated Louis who stumbles in, obviously leaning on the door when it opened making Harry automatically reach out and catch him.

“ I bet ya never thought I’d ever fall for ya hey Harold “ Louis laughs.

“ Can I please..umm..like..fuck. can I just sleep here please?“ Louis finally spits out as he looks around the lounge room.

“ Wait. Are you sleeping on the couch?“

Harry walks to the kitchen and returns handing Louis some water and Panadol.

“ To answer your question, yes I was asleep on the couch and yes you can sleep here, you know you don’t have to ask anymore. “

“ I guess I kinda thought u might have still been a little mad at me .“

Louis skulls the water as he was indeed dehydrated. Harry takes the glass placing it on the counter.

For the first time in a few days. It’s awkward.

Louis walks over to the couch sitting at the end pulling up the blanket from the floor.

“ what are you waiting for?“

“ You wanna sleep here? That’s gonna be a tad uncomfy don’t ya think? There’s not a lot of room.“

Harry joins him on the lounge as Louis pushes him backwards slightly so his head and lower back are leaning on the lounge end. Louis spreads Harry’s legs and positions himself in between placing the blanket securely over them. He leans back so his head is resting on Harry’s belly.

“ Quite comfy I’d say “ Louis giggles as Harry flicks off the lamp next to him.

It’s quiet for a few moments and Harry can’t help it, he places his hand on top of Louis’s head and gently strokes his hair.

“ Harry?“

Louis turns completely around his chin now adjacent to his stomach. Harry is consumed with nerves as Louis starts to crawl up his torso not stopping until their faces are aligned.

“ Yeah“ is all he can muster out.

The art of seduction is knowing what the other person wants and slowly giving it to them in a way that no one else can.

Louis moves his lips inches from Harry’s mouth.

“ If you are going to play around Harry then do it with me not some fucking bartender“

It isn’t said with haste or anger but rather seductively. Harry’s breath hitches and as he goes to respond Louis places his finger over his mouth.

Louis runs one of his hands down Harry until he securely takes hold of Harry’s hard cock. He squeezes gently making Harry moan. Smiling to himself Louis again meets Harry’s lips with his own. The light tender kisses he was used to are all but gone, now replaced with hunger and passion. Harry slides his tongue into Louis’s mouth finally getting the chance to taste him properly for the first time. Louis pulls back deciding to attack Harry’s neck sucking with such force that Harry is sure he has drawn blood.

“ Louis stop you’re drunk, you don’t mean what you’re saying.“

Louis who is resting his forehead on Harrys replies

“ But I do…I’m not as drunk as you think I am.“

“ Fuck Lou…you are making this incredibly hard to behave myself around you. “

Louis leans down to nip at his earlobe before whispering into his ear.

“ Then don’t“

Harry grabbed the back of Louis’s neck pulling him back a little so he too could sit upright. With Louis now inadvertently straddling his lap he connected their lips once again.

Harry is starting to wonder if this is all a dream. Meanwhile, Louis is freaking out that he finally had the courage to make this happen, but his glad he had because Louis is in such a place of serenity that he can’t wipe the smile off his face.

Louis grabs Harry’s tee shirt pulling it up and over his head throwing it across the room. Pushing Harry backwards he plants kisses from his neck all the way down to his sweatpants. He tucks his fingers into the waistband and stops.

“ Can I? I just want to try something, I might not be any good but …“

Harry sits back up immediately suddenly worried about him. With all this action happening and his own desires taking over, he had totally forgotten in the mix of things that Louis was new to all this. He doesn’t have any boy-on-boy experience his never done any of this before.

“ Shit Lou, are you really sure about this? We don’t have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable “

Louis decides that answering with his actions is better than words. He pulls down Harry’s pants letting his dick spring out free. There’s enough light illuminating in from the moon outside and Louis can vaguely see but he can certainly feel Harry’s length. Louis’s mouth drops open

“ Holy fuck Haz, I mean ..I’m glad you can’t see my face I’m fucking blushing, you are huge! “

Harry laughs as He looks at Louis who is already watching Harry intensely. Harry watches Louis’s silhouette as he bends down closer and closer towards his groin.

Harry flings his head back as Louis takes him half into his mouth. Louis is sucking beautifully and Harry can’t help but wonder whether this is truly Louis’s first time as he seems to know too well what his doing. Harry tries hard not to buck his hips but fails resulting in Louis taking in a little more than he could handle making Louis gag a little.

“ Fuck I’m so sorry “

Louis tightens his grip on Harry’s hip digging his fingernails in at the same time while his other hand holds him firmly around the base of his dick. He pulls him out of his mouth and licks his tongue from the base up to his tip swirling his tongue around his slit enjoying the taste of his pre cum. Without warning, Louis starts vigorously pumping him several times before fully taking him back into his mouth. As he starts bobbing his head up and down his length Louis uses his hand to caress Harry’s balls sending him into overstimulation.

“ Fuck Lou. I’m so close, pull off babe“

Louis does as his told which Harry appreciates because being his first time he didn’t want to overwhelm him too much. Louis was kinda disappointed with Harry’s suggestion, so as he watched Harry coming close to his high as he started to arch his back Louis leaned back down for a final suck just in time to feel Harry’s warm load shoot down his throat.

“ LOUISSS“ Harry hissed in pleasure.

When Harry finally stops panting he lunges forward switching their positions. Harry leans down placing a sweet quick kiss to his lips.

“ Are you sure about this Lou? Really sure?“

“ Please Harry“

That was all Harry needed to hear before he gave Louis his first ever blow job from a man. An experience and a night he will never forget.

As they once again find themselves cuddled more tightly than before Louis softly speaks

“ I missed you last night Harry.“

---

A/N

Crap chapter I know.

Sorry. I tried to make up for it with a longer chapter ..did it work? haha.

Sorry about the smut as I’ve said before In my other fics I’m no good at writing it but I give it a shot cos I know most of you thirst for it.

:)

♡♡♡

Chapter 9 - Temptation

Happiness is waking up and feeling the warmthness of the person you love, laying right beside you.

Louis’s arm is hung loosely around Harry’s waist as he snuggles into his back. He can feel his hot breath blow against his neck every time he exhales. His still lightly sleeping which Harry knows just by the sound and movements of his levelled out breathing.

When Harry tries to gently pull his arm out from under his pillow as its given him a dead arm, he feels Louis slightly shuffle and it brings an instant smile to Harry’s face because the grip around his waist just got tighter with Louis who subconsciously, must have been thinking Harry was going to leave the bed.

Harry can hear the light morning traffic from the street outside. It’s a sign the sun’s about to rise, so he doesn’t want to open his eyes. He knows that the moment Louis opens his, all permission to touch is gone again until the following sunset. It’s a long wait for Harry, that craving in-between but he doesn’t mind because the fact that his actually having all this contact with him is everything his ever dreamed of.

Moving from the fetal position he is in, Harry stretches his leg out straight prompting Louis to stir. When Harry returns back to his original position he stops as he purses his lips firmly together.

He can feel Louis’s boner pressed to his ass which makes his own morning glory start to arise. He doesn’t want to open his eyes in case it’s daylight. He pushes back a little trying not to be too obvious which gains a small moan out of Louis’s mouth.

Louis must have been brought out of his sleep by his own sound making him realise what he had done. His arm is suddenly pulled away from Harry’s waist and Harry misses the contact immediately. He feels Louis leave the bed and hears him close the ensuite door.

Giving in Harry opens his eyes just in time to see the sun start glaring through the window. As sad as that makes him his not too devastated, it’s only what…another 12 hours until the sun goes back down and the touching can resume. It’s not that long right?

Harry wants to rid of that rule but he doesn’t want to bring it up in case it scares Louis off. It’s not a rule they have spoken about it kind of just happened that way.

Harry noticed it straight away when Louis wouldn’t come near him during the day but as night time appeared things became different. He doesn’t know how long this is going to last with Louis, at any given moment he may pull the plug and end it all and Harry doesn’t want to risk whatever time he may have left.

The bathroom door opens and he can hear Louis getting dressed from behind him. Harry rolls over watching him pick up his shirt from the floor. Louis decides to pretend he doesn’t know his being watched, pretending to concentrate on putting his shirt in the right way while flexing his bare chest. Harry doesn’t comment either, too invested in the free perve session that has been given.

“ Hey Lou“

“ Mhmm“

“ firstonetosaythewordwhathastocookbreakfast“

Harry blurts out the fastest he has ever spoken in his life. Louis ties the lace on his last sneaker standing back up looking towards Harry

“ I have no idea what you just said. “

“ Ha!! you just said it !!“

“ Harry, what the actual fuck are you talking about?“

“ You said it again!!!!“

“ Are you feeling ok, should I ring a doctor, a therapist maybe?“

Harry belts out a laugh before sitting up properly in the bed crossing his legs.

“I..said..first..person..to..say..the..word..WHAT..has..to..make..breakfast” Harry spells out in a dramatic slower tone.

“ Omg, You do really talk some shit but clever, very clever. Fine I will make you breakfast sure thing, Not my problem if you are sick all day with food poisoning. “ Louis smirks in the hopes Harry will change his mind but it fails.

“ Good, I will wait right here and Lou….try not to burn it yeah and ..um.. don’t be too long I’m kinda starving“

Harry winks as Louis laughs on his way to the door but stops, turning back towards Harry.

“ You know what H, you are gonna fucking love my cooking. I’m that confident that You will, that I’m willing to even bet on it. “

Harry grins adorably, so much so that Louis wants nothing more than to run back to the bed and shower him with kisses…. but he doesn’t. In fact, Louis’s attention has returned back to ‘breakfast’ and Louis’s naughty thoughts take over as he realises he is indeed hungry but the only thing Louis feels like eating right now…. has completely nothing to do with food.

“ Alright Tommo out with it, what are we betting on?“

“ Nothing spectacular just $100 “

Harry laughs and fires back a sarcastic comment. A comment a few seconds later that he wishes he could totally retract.

“ Whoah shit Louis a $100 over breakfast, you know your gonna lose. So eager to waste your money, what’s your name Elly?“

Harry laughs at first having not thought it through properly. Louis is staring at him with a blank look and now Harry is praying to God that he saw it as a joke the way it was intended and didn’t take it the wrong way.

Louis places his hand on his hip and fuck if looks could kill Harry would be a dead man.

“ Wow, Harry wow.“

Harry starts to panic raising up out of the bed to apologise but is quickly shut down.

“ Lou I’m so s-“

Louis starts laughing abruptly while Harry frowns not understanding what is happening.

“ Your face Harold. You were shitting your pants. You know what, seeing you have no faith in my cooking ability I’m upping the stakes to $200 fucking dollars and for the record, I will take that in cash, not by card“

Louis laughs leaving the room. As he heads down the stairs he hears Harry call out.

“ I will have strawberry waffles and a cup of coffee!!“

Louis shakes his head as he giggles at Harry’s cheekiness before shouting back.

“ Beggers can’t be choosers curly, you get what you were given or go without !“

Harry hasn’t moved from his spot on the bed. Sitting upright with his hands casually behind his head he looks at the clock on the wall. It’s been 28mins.

Finally, the door swings open and in walks a proud looking Louis holding a serving tray. Harry can’t help but return the smile as Louis places it on the bed sheet beside him. Looking down at the food Harry is quite impressed.

He may not have gotten his waffles but what sat before him looked scrumptious, smelling absolutely delicious. A full English breakfast comprising of fried tomatoes, 2 sausages, eggs and bacon and last but not least some beans and toast. Harry doesn’t say anything he grabs the fork digging into the beans.

“ Well, I tell ya what Tomlinson this is amazing. I thought you said you couldn’t cook. Shit, I think I owe you an apology. “

Louis leans down close to his face causing some faint sexual tension as he speaks softly into his ear.

“ You don’t owe me an apology, you owe me $200“.

Harry bursts out laughing as he pushes Louis backwards playfully. Louis proceeds to hold out his hand.

“ Hand it over styles!“

“ Wait you want it right now. I can’t even finish the food, bloody hell“

Harry jumps out of the bed walking over to his jeans that are on the floor reaching into the pocket and collecting his wallet.

“ Here you go. You have left me with $20 in my wallet. I should have subtracted half as you got me tea instead of coffee. “

Louis snatches the money quickly holding it in his palm.

“ Nice doing business with ya. Enjoy your food haz, I’m gonna go clean up real quick.“

Louis faces away from Harry and almost makes it to the door when Harry notices a piece of paper fall out of Lous back pocket. Harry keeps quiet as Louis exits the room.

Picking up the white paper he screams out to Louis who is already halfway down the stairs.

“ Louis you little fucker !!!“

Hearing Harry shout, Louis smirks to himself and Harry hears Louis’s fast footsteps running down the remainder of the stairs.

“ Loueeh“

Harry chases him down the stairs and stops when he gets to the kitchen. He can’t help but bend over clasping his hands on his knees as he falls into a pit of laughter. Harry watches Louis who is standing like a statue his eyes closed, nose scrunched up with his hands covering his eyes in an attempt to ’ hide’.

“ You little cheater!!“

“ I have no idea what you are talking about“ Louis states laughing as he starts to walk backwards slowly backing himself into a corner.

“ You mean to say, I’m just imaging this takeaway box here and this little receipt from the Cafe down the road that unfortunately for you, fell out your back pocket.. huh?“

As they both crack up laughing Harry lunges forward tickling the shit outta him. There’s a moment where desire kicks in and Harry and Louis find themselves in a moment of weakness.

The only time when ‘losing’ is more fun than ‘winning’ is when you are fighting against temptation.

Harry is currently in a position of power. He has Louis backed in a corner holding him tightly around his wrists which is being sternly held above his head. Everything stops as they both discover how close they really are.

Starring at each other fiercely, it’s easy as an outsider to observe how much desire has entered the room and how much each man is trying to hold back. Harry turns his head to look out the kitchen window taking a deep breath when reality hits him that it’s still daytime.

Upon returning his gaze back to Louis whose eyes are flicking between Harry’s eyes and lips, Harry makes a bold choice and slowly starts to lean in.

Their lips are so close as both hold still, breathing into each other’s mouth. If either of them move even the slightest, their mouths will connect. Harry feels a twitch in his pants and is cursing inside for not being about to control himself.

Harry squeezes Louis’s hands which are still firmly above his head, while Louis bites the corner of his lip at the action. Harry assumes that’s the green light he was waiting for when all of a sudden Louis’s front doorbell rings.

Harry immediately pulls back stepping to the side allowing Louis to manoeuvre around him. Louis looks confused not having any clue who could possibly be at his door.

Harry moves upstairs at a high speed feeling the need to hide. He’s not sure why but it’s the first time he feels a bit of guilt realising what they are doing is wrong and that they could in fact be caught at some point.

He quickly gets dressed properly and even though he knows it’s wrong in all ways, shapes and form, he positions himself at the top of the staircase to try and eavesdrop on Louis’s conversation.

“ Barry I’m not going to lie, I totally forgot you were dropping by today. “

Harry recognises the name as Louis publisher, his boss. Not wanting to pry any longer Harry returns to Louis’s room packing up his stuff and deciding to head on home for the day as he remembers Louis still needs time here and there to get some work done.

Another 10 minutes goes by before he hears Louis closing the front door.

Louis enters the room and looks confused as he watches Harry rise from the bed grasping his keys wallet and phone all into one hand.

“ Harry…Sorry, I didn’t mean to take too long my boss Barry Grump who I forgot was stopping by needed to have a quick word about starting a new book, are you going somewhere?“

“ Yeah just home for a bit.“

“ But I thought we were going to go to the museum today, you were really looking forward to it. “

Harry flashes an apologetic smile.

“ I was, but it sounds to me like someone needs to spend some time on their new book. Don’t worry we can go out later tonight if you like….if ….you get some work done.“ Harry demands

“ Yes Daddy…fuck I mean mum…yes mum!..oh my god“

As Louis turns away with embarrassment, Harry who laughed initially is currently already reminiscing how fucking hot that just sounded coming out of his mouth and how much he would kill for, to hear it again.

“ Yeah um.. I will text you later. Good luck on whatever sick horror twisted thing you come up with this time.“

“ Actually. Barry has asked for something different this time around, wants something nonfiction something my readers wouldn’t expect. So yeah pressure, a lot of fucking pressure. I’ve never written anything other than horror fiction. “

The men continue down to the lower level and Harry turns his attention to the blue-eyed boy who looks nervous. Both stare at each other both not knowing what to do. Why is this all of a sudden feeling weird? Do we shake goodbye, high 5, hug, kiss, the struggle is real.

“ So I’ll catch you later ok“

“ you promise“

“ 100 % “

Harry spends the next couple of hours catching up with work emails and a few errands. Surprisingly enough the day flies by and his happy with all the stuff he completed today.

It’s getting close to 5 pm and he knows Louis will be wanting dinner shortly and as if on cue his phone starts to ring. He smiles to himself jogging over to the lounge room coffee table where his phone was located. Without looking at the caller ID he answers it knowing Louis’s stomach must be grumbling.

“ Hey Handsome“

“ Handsome?“

“ LEXI ?? !?!? “

Fuck.

---

Louis has been stuck in his home office chair for too long. Besides his numb ass and the cramps in his legs, his getting way too bored as he can’t seem to concentrate. His boss throwing him a curve ball for his next project has him extremely concerned, as he has no idea on what to write about.

Having Harry stuck in his head 24/7 is hard enough let alone trying to write a new ‘out of his comfort zone’ type of novel. It’s like a switch turns on and Louis’s fingers move rapidly across his laptop keyboard suddenly finding motivation.

Before he realises, 9 hours have passed and it’s just passed 4 pm. He needs a break. He looks at himself in the bathroom mirror and scrunches his nose at the facial hair that is starting to look a little messy. He grabs the clippers and shaves his face. He opts to take a shower and clean himself up a bit.

As the hot steamy water fills the bathroom Louis scrubs his skin with coconut body wash. He sniffs his forearm surprised at how nice it smells mentally thanking Elly.

Jumping out and drying himself. He stands in his boxers as he searches through his closet. He has a sudden wish to present himself properly. He wants to feel nice, look nice, smell nice……fuck he wants to impress Harry.

He decides on a brown Burberry checkered shirt and denim jeans topped off with some white trainers. He dries his hair then adds a little product slightly styling it. When he finally finished he picks up his phone as he has the best idea for dinner.

After a little googling he finds the number he was searching for and calls to make a booking.

He doesn’t ring Harry, instead thinking surprising him will be more fun. Ringing the bell, it doesn’t take Harry long to present himself at the front door.

“ Louis…..come in…did you get much work done?“

Harry steps aside letting Louis past him.

“ I did….but anyhow, I have news…I’ve booked us somewhere for dinner. But…… it’s an hour’s drive from here. So get moving and get ready “

Harry claps his hands in excitement.

“ Ok. I will pop in the shower quickly. Where are we going?“

Louis shakes his head no.

“ Nope not telling you, you will have to just wait and see. “

“ Then how am I supposed to know what to wear? “

“ Neat and casual nothing too fancy“

Harry smiles and points to the lounge room.

“ Make yourself at home, I won’t be long. 10 mins max“

Louis already knows his 10 minutes isn’t going to be 10 minutes rather 25 at least. He plonks himself into the large lounge chair and looks around the room. There are photo frames along the wall filled with pictures of Harry and Lexi. He moves closer to get a better look. He finds himself stuck staring at a photo of Harry and Lexi dressed in formal wear at what looks like a wedding. He quickly pulls his eyes away the moment he suddenly found himself replacing Lexi’s body with his own.

His estimate was almost correct as Harry emerges 30 minutes later.

“ Fuck I had trouble finding something to wear. Does this look ok?“

“ You always look great Haz“

Harry searches around the kitchen finding his wallet and phone.

“ Ok let’s go“

---

“ What is this place?“ Harry asks as Louis pulls into the carpark.

They have spent the last hour driving out to a secluded little cabin that is hidden in the woods just off the main highway. From the outside, it looks small and cosy but upon entering it’s a lot bigger than it looks. It’s pretty much set up like a pub but a little cozier and more private.

After finding their small booth Harry takes a good look at the surroundings blown away by the cuteness wondering how it was that he didn’t know that this place even existed.

“ Lou this is amazing. “

Halfway through their main course, the waiter approaches the table holding a little notebook and a camera drawing both of their attention.

“ Sorry to interrupt you gentlemen, my name is Sam. I was just wondering if you guys would be interested in winning yourself a hefty $1000? “

Louis’s eyes pop open like it’s Christmas morning. Harry being the more skeptical of the two can’t help but ask questions.

“ Sounds good but how exactly? What is the catch?“

“ There is not so much of a catch, but see that board over there“

Sam points towards a wooden light brown pin up board that is hung near the bar that is covered in photos.

“ yeah, what about it?“ Harry asks.

“Each month we pick a winner for the cutest couple on a date. All you have to do is pose for the camera kissing your partner and you are in the draw”

Both Harry and Louis suddenly feel the urge to re-adjust themselves in their seat.

“ Thanks but sorry we are not- “

Harry feels a kick to his shin under the table. Feeling the pain he diverts his eyes to Louis who is trying to contain a laugh. Louis puts a hand over his mouth as for Sam not to lip read and whispers to Harry.

“ I really could use that $1000 Hazza now shut up and just kiss me you fool.“

Harry inhales deeply, he looks over to the window noticing it’s become dark outside already. Of course, it has. Returning his gaze back to the waiter he smirks.

“ Sure. Why not.“

Sam gives Harry a form to fill out their details in case they win, while Louis wriggles his bum moving himself closer to Harry in the booth. Sam raises his camera.

“ Ok guys give us your best kiss if you’re wanting to win!….3.2.1 “

Harry places his arm on the back of Louis’s neck pulling him in for a kiss to the cheek. Louis had a different idea. He turns his cheek connecting their lips instead.

It’s a nice slow kiss their lips pressed tightly together. Harry removes his lips now slightly parted before pressing in again.

“ Got it, thanks, guys. Good luck“

Sam says as he walks away from the table but the boys don’t hear anything too caught up in their own little bubble of heaven.

Louis parts his lips letting Harry gently run his tongue along his bottom lip biting it gently before letting it go. Louis is desperate for more and doesn’t seem to remember where he is as he starts to palm Harry’s crotch under the table.

Louis widens his eyes clearly shocked, scooting backwards realising the waiter was gone and that they were in public. Louis can feel his hard and as much as he tries to think of other things to distract himself he can’t.

Harry is in the exact same position. Harry can see Louis is freaking out a little and places his hand on Louis’s thigh giving him a little rub with his thumb to try and soothe him. It works because the moment Harry’s skin connects with Louis he is instantly relaxed.

It goes quiet for a moment both looking deeply into each other’s eyes, both wondering if the other had felt the same intense euphoric feeling of desire in their stomachs, the fire burning throughout their bones craving for the next wave of physical pleasure that is igniting all their senses.

Harry knows. He knows now deep within his soul that he is in love, in love with his best friend.

There comes a time in life when you may be lucky enough to kiss someone with so much passion and sincerity that you suddenly realise that those lips, are the only lips you want to kiss for the rest of your life.

He needs to calm down and snap out of it, so he tries.

“ Well..erm..You um…want some dessert?“

Harry picks up the menu his eyes pretending to skim over the paper. Louis smiles and Leans close to Harry, his lips brushing against his ear.

Harry coughs using his fist to tap at his chest in an attempt to clear his throat at the unexpected words that just blessed his ears. His shocked. He looks at Louis whose cheeks are flushing bright red.

“ What did you just say ?“ Harry asks, needing clarification that he did hear him correctly.

“ I said….You are my dessert. Now take me home and fuck me. “

---

Longest chapter yet I think, Jeez almost 4000 word count.

Thoughts on chapter ??

Who’s falling harder you think?

♡♡♡

Chapter 10- Popped

A/N I haven’t proof read so, sorry if there’s any mistakes or weird words haha :)

“ Again?“ “Yes.Now!! Please Harry”

Sex is more than an act of pleasure, it’s the ability to be able to feel so close to a person, so connected, so comfortable, that it becomes almost breath-taking. It comes to a point that when ‘making love’ you somewhat become a part of them.

For Harry and Louis, they no longer feel they are individuals as such, crossing that line from friendship to lovers and experiencing each other in a totally new and exciting way, they feel more whole, a team if you will.

Harry never in his wildest dreams, would have ever imagined there would come a day where he would deny Louis of anything, let alone another round between the sheets.

“ Lou geez c’mon, I need a break.“

It’s currently 2 am and approximately four hours ago the men, for the first time had finally had the pleasure of indulging with each other in the most intimate way possible. Some-ones ‘gay virginity’ has well and truly been popped.

“ A little break right? “

“ Are you not sore enough?“ Harry teases.

Louis smirks as he crawls over to Harry who is currently sitting on the side of the bed as he skulls a cup of water. Louis starts to gentle nip at the top of Harry’s shoulder and Louis knows his plan is working when he feels Harry shiver.

“ You don’t have any self-control do you?“ Harry laughs as he spins around quickly pinning him to the bed.

“ How can I with you laying naked beside me“ He jokes wriggling his eyebrows up and down.

Harry leans down placing a sweet gentle kiss below his ear.

“ You kiss my neck like that again Harold and I’m not responsible for whatever happens next“

Harry continues to press multiple quick kisses down his neck and chest. Louis lets out a small barely there moan as Harry reaches his belly button.

“ You wanna know what’s happening next huh, well…..“ Harry teases.

Louis arches his hips off the bed towards Harry when he felt him palm his groin.

“ I’m going to get us a cup of tea, so you can calm down and we can go to sleep.“

Louis sits up so fast as he feels Harry crawl off of him and stand to his feet collecting his shirt from the floor.

“ Excuse me what! I don’t want no fucking tea I want your fucking d- “

Harry picks up one of the little rectangular pillows and throws it at him, shutting him up in the process. Harry laughs as he proceeds towards the door.

“ Fine don’t say I never offered. “ Harry laughs but is soon stopped by Louis who has sprung from the bed and ran to block him from leaving the room.

“ password “ Louis grins.

“ What are you 5? Let me out“

“ Password“ Louis demands once again.

Curious Harry decides to play along.

“ Abracadabra ?“

“ Password denied“ Louis replies in a robotic voice then pressing his lips together trying not to laugh.

Harry can’t help but laugh at Louis’s playfulness.

“ Open sesame? “

“ Password Denied“

Harry huffs and Louis leans close to kiss him.

“ Seems you need help Haz…. The password is ….“

• kisses his lips*

“Promise ….” kisses his lips

“Me….” kisses his lips

“Round 4”

• kisses his lips*

“When…” kisses his lips

“You…” kisses his lips

“Get ….”

Louis doesn’t give a quick peck this time. He licks Harry’s lip making Harry part them allowing him to pash him. He sucks his lower lip letting go with a pop.

“Back…..”

Harry feels those familiar butterflies return as he stares into Louis’s eyes. Only 24 hours earlier there was no way they would have been discussing this or acting on these cravings. But the flood has arrived and the gates have been widely opened.

“ You really are an animal, Tomlinson.“

“ Don’t act like you don’t like it, Harold, it’s not like I hid how sexually frustrated I’ve been… and well….you made it quite apparent, you were willing to um…you know…“

It shouldn’t be awkward to discuss but since they hadn’t spoken of it yet it did feel kinda weird and out of place.

Harry just smiles, happy that Louis has finally admitted out loud that this was happening, It was all real and not some made up fantasy playing out in Harry’s mind.

Louis slaps Harry’s ass.

“ Hurry up“

Harry turns his head just in time to watch Louis jump back into the bed. Louis who knows he’s being watched lays onto his side, one hand to the side of his head holding him up. Bending up his outer leg he giggles.

“ You wanna draw me like one of those French girls“

“ Oh my fucking god. Shit. Nope. I’m going to get my tea“

They both laugh heavily. Harry hears Louis shout as he heads down the stairs.

“ You mean OUR tea“

“ Nope. You declined remember! Correct me if I’m wrong but I’m pretty sure you said and I quote: I don’t want no fucking tea“

Harry can hear Louis scoff which makes Harry giggle. Louis doesn’t reply or need to be worried. He knows Harry will 100% bring him back a cup of tea.

As Harry stands at the counter staring into space as he waits for the kettle, he finds himself reminiscing.

The drive home from the restaurant was very quiet Harry is shocked. His totally excited but in a silently 'freaking out' kind of way. Harry couldn't wipe the smile off his face the entire way home, already contemplating half the ways he wants to sink his teeth into Louis. 

Meanwhile, Louis was a nervous wreck. It was he who started this. He was the one to be brave and suggest it, it was his words no one else's. He wanted it and now that they are heading home he finds himself utterly jittery. He is more than nervous, his scared. Excited but he knows having not done this before that he doesn't know what to expect. 

There's a million questions swarming his mind. 

' who tops who bottoms?'
' Is this going to hurt?'
' What if I can't please Harry properly?' 
' Does this mean I'm gay GAY?'
'Am I the worst husband on the planet?' 
'Will Harry not want me anymore if we do this?' 

but the one question that sticks out the most and that he finds harder to ponder about is..... 

' Am I falling in love with Harry?' 

Louis's heart is being pulled in all sorts of directions and his starting to wish he had never said anything at all. 

Walking in the front door of Harry's house Louis immediately excuses himself to the bathroom. Harry is starting to see what's happening. The moment Louis returns he goes to speak but Louis interrupts. 

" I'm just going home. " 

Harry nods and Louis walks quickly towards the front door. Harry should be used to this by now, it's not the first or second time Louis has walked out on him, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt nonetheless. 

Harry feels bad. He can see the panic in Louis's eyes. He is changing his mind and although Harry is disappointed, he doesn't care because if Louis is not ready or scared even the slightest bit, he won't do anything to upset him more or proceed any further. Louis being comfortable and his happiness is all that matters in Harry's eyes. 

Reaching the door handle Louis turns back sharply when he realises he didn't really explain himself. 

" Oh shit Harry. I mean , I will be back , I just, I need 30 mins and I will be back. " 

Harry's heart slows back down as he blows out a huge exhale of air when he hears the door close.
Soon enough Harry finds himself unknowingly doing the exact same thing that Louis has rushed home to do. 

Louis races to the shower and scrubs himself clean. It's the quickest shower he has ever had but he has no time to waste. Wrapping a towel around himself he whips open the bathroom vanity grabbing his toothbrush. Starring back at his reflection Louis repeats the same words over and over. 

' You can do this.' 'It's just sex' 
' You can do this ' 'It's just sex' 

Meanwhile, in Harry's bathroom, a similar scene is being played out but with totally different words and most definitely with stronger emotions. 

'Don't scare or hurt him' 
'He means everything' 

There's a clear division happening which either haven't realised yet. Whether it's friends, partners, lovers, or couples, communication is the lifeline of any relationship. To effectively communicate properly we must realise that we as individual human beings are all different in the way we perceive certain things. 

Harry and Louis have yet to understand that the worst distance between two people occurs when there is a misunderstanding. 

Harry knowing it's Louis's first time, wants everything to be perfect. After he too has showered and made himself desirable he sets up his guest bedroom. He softens the lights, makes the bed 3 times over, and lights a scented candle. He opens his drawer and pulls out a condom. Shit shit shit. he muffles to himself as he can't find any lube. 
' what am I going to do' ..... 

He quickly googles what he can use instead of lube deciding on using the Aloe Vera he has found. 

Harry is wishing he could say, that taking this big step with Louis feels good because it's the first guy he has slept with since Lexi but he can't and he curses at his actions from screwing the bartender the other day. 

When Louis arrives back, both of them are seemingly shy, which is totally understandable as this is the first time they have ever planned on being intimate instead of it being spontaneous, both gently smile before laughing. 

Harry notices Louis wiping his hands down his pants as he eyes the room trying his hardest to avoid Harry's eye contact. His freaking out. Harry walks over closer to Louis bypassing him while running his hand along Louis's lower back. 

" Hey, relax ok..a wine maybe?" 

" yes, please. " 

Harry hands him the glass and turns on the vinyl player to slow classic music setting the mood. Louis chugs the entire glass as he realised this seemed more date-like than a casual hook up, and maybe doing all this was meaning more to Harry than he thought. 

Harry grabs each of his hands in his, both getting completely lost deep into each other's eyes. Harry is hoping he is calming Louis, which on any other normal night it would have but tonight it's just made him even worse as his heart rate rises, as he swallows a dry lump in his throat. 

Louis thinks maybe now might be a good time to address how they are truly feeling and what it means for each of them but that is pushed straight to the back of his mind the moment Harry places his hand softly cupping his cheek as he pulls him in to connect their lips. All of Louis's rational thoughts have now been demolished as his caught in this tranquillity that Harry presents. 

" You are going to be ok, I promise you, Lou" 

That was it. That was the moment Louis relaxed as he trusted Harry's words. It was also the moment that fate made sure it was going to erupt on the men in the upcoming weeks. There are 3 things you should never break. 

Promises, Trust, and Someone's heart. 

Unknown to Harry and Louis over the next several hours each of them were about to make a mistake. 

" Follow me" Louis felt safe as he took Harry's hand as he was guided to Harry's room. 

Harry had every intention of treating Louis delicately and with the utmost care but Louis had other ideas which we can all assume came to light when he noticed the romantic setting in which Harry had organised. 

Louis tugged at the bottom of Harry's shirt, and Harry instantly removed it. Louis placed his hand on Harry's bare chest letting it linger for a little longer than intended. Louis felt something inside of him that made him 100X more terrified than he already was. He felt a sense of love and that was something Louis was not expecting. 

To discard that unwanted attachment he chanted the words in his head. 

' Its just sex, it's just sex' 

He moved quickly unzipping Harry's pants leaving no place for any hesitation as he lunged his hands down his jeans taking him into his hand. He put his other hand behind Harry's head pulling him down a little to attack his neck. He sloppily kissed all around his ear area before latching on and sucking a nice purple bruise. 

Harry surprised at the sudden pace they were moving pulled back. 

" Lou, slow down...there's no need to rush " 

But Louis had no intention of listening. The nerves, completely now taking over. To Louis, he just wanted to have sex already. He wanted to get things moving. Sadly but true, he just wanted to fuck Harry quickly to prove to himself that it was sex just sex and not that niggling little feeling of love that was now wedged so far back inside of him. 

⚠️ Slight Smut warning ⚠️ 

Louis was rock hard as he pulled down his pants revealing himself. Harry now totally aroused at Louis's determination, throws him down onto the bed. Unlike Louis, Harry was still trying to be gentle, still wanting to take care of him and really make sure he enjoys this first time experience but Louis was making it really hard. 

" Harry. Don't make me wait please" 

Hearing those words Harry collected his '"lube" coating his fingers as he took in the sight of Louis's tight little pink hole that was all laid before him, making Harry drawl at the mouth. 

The room was so silent making it feel somewhat awkward. Louis, being Louis found a way to lighten the mood. 

" So.....I'm guessing I'm bottoming then since you never asked. " Louis laughs as Harry smirks and giggles. 

If you don't laugh during sex at least once, then you are having sex with the wrong person. 

" I didn't even think to ask? I mean I top most times, shit I'm so sorry Louis I really should have asked. " 

" Harry it's fine really. I'm quite happy to lay here and enjoy myself why you do all the work" Louis replies sarcastically. 

" ooh, now I'm really gonna make you earn every fucking moan." 

" Mission accepted styles" 

Harry spreads Louis's legs apart leaning down to kiss him one last time to reassure him before returning down to between his legs. Harry lowers his head using his tongue to lick a stripe up his hole. 

" Harry what are you doin- HOLY FUCK ooh oh fuck " 

Louis moans as Harry dips his tongue inside of him. 
Harry rubs his finger around his entrance making him nice and oiled up. 

" I'm going to open you up ok" 

Louis nods his head yes before throwing his head backwards to stare at the ceiling. 

" Was that a yes?" 

" Yes I'm ready" 

" Are you sure?" 

" YES" 

Harry continues on his way to open him up and to Harry's surprise, Louis is taking his fingers easier than he thought he would. 

" Are you ready for me?" 

" Yes" 

Harry grabs the condom and places it upon himself. 

Harry can feel Louis's apprehension when he aligns himself at his entrance feeling Louis clench a little. 

" Louis if you're not ready we don't have to" 

" NO please I do...don't stop please" 

Like normal Harry can't deny him anything. Slowly inserting the tip of his cock into him Harry stops allowing him to adjust to the stretch. 

" Go" 

Harry wastes no time and pushes himself the rest of the way in. He hears Louis hiss but it's suddenly replaced with a moan as Harry pulls out pushing back in sliding his dick against Louis's prostate on the way. 

" Fuck Harry. You feel so good" 

Harry can't seem to find any words or desire to reply as his consumed in his own little world at finally getting to hear Louis moan underneath him. 

" Faster Haz " 

Heaven, that's what Harry is in right now as Louis's words are music to his ears. He grabs both of Louis's legs throwing them up and over his shoulders followed by thrusting into him deeper and deeper. 

Louis is squirming with pleasure as Harry watches him grip the bed sheets. Harry takes hold of Louis's leaking cock and starts pumping him in rhythm to each pounding. 

"Fuck Harry " 

Harry is so much In a state of euphoria at feeling Louis's tight walls for the first time that he doesn't realise he is slamming him hard as he starts to build up the need for his own release. 

" Fuck I'm sorry, I'm so sorry baby, you want me to stop?" 

Louis never answers that question instead screams 

" I'm so close Harry fucking hell" 

Hearing that sends Harry over the edge. He lets go of Louis grabbing him by the hips to hold him in place as he thrusts into him deeply one last time holding himself inside of him as he feels himself fill the condom. 

Harry looks to Louis's cock with the intention of finishing him off but he already came. A long streak of thick white cum covers his torso. 

" Holy fuck Lou, " 

Harry who is panting ferociously slowly pulls out discarding the latex onto the bedside table. He walks over to the large single seat in the corner of the room grabbing the towel he prepared earlier to clean Louis up. 

Harry feels amazing and is so happy that they have gotten to experience this together. Every look, every flirt, every touch from over the last few weeks that had built up within them, has finally been able to be burst open and looking at Louis who can't wipe the smile off his face, is pretty sure he must be feeling the same way. 

~~~END of flashback~~~ 

Harry is drawn out of his memory by Louis screaming. 

" Fucking hell styles have you run to China to make it or something what's taking you so goddam long." 

Harry feels the kettle realising it must have boiled some time ago as it's only now Luke warm. He makes the tea returning to his room. 

" Your tea" 

" Thank you. " 

" Well Your lucky your cute" 

" Well, You are lucky....um......ah.." 

Harry laughs as he sees Louis struggling with a comeback. 

" Shut up Harry" 

" Careful there Tommo, that's no way to talk to someone who has something that you want. " 

Louis raises an eyebrow oblivious as Harry grabs his dick in the same sense as Michael Jackson used to. 

" Oh, Harry you fucking kill me. " 

Louis is in stitches laughing so hard it's hurting his ribs. 

" Don't ever do that again " He continues to laugh. 

For the next 3 hours as both of them settle they have discussed everything under the sun and it felt liberating for them both. It's nearing 5.30 am and after all their shenanigans, you would think they would have fallen asleep a lot earlier. 

Louis has his head resting on Harry's chest who is caressing Louis's back while they speak. Harry doesn't want this moment to end. It's the closest they have ever been physically and emotionally. Harry keeps looking towards the window knowing that the sun is due to make its appearance very soon. 

18 minutes later the inevitable happens and the sun starts to shine through the curtain. Harry closes his eyes not wanting to witness Louis pull off of him but he doesn't. Harry thinks he may have fallen asleep but only seconds later he feels Louis squeeze his torso ever so gently. If Harry wasn't paying too much attention he wouldn't have even felt it. Harry's joy is short lived when he feels Louis lift his weight off of him and roll to the side. 

Harry isn't aware that he has made a mistake. Louis however caught it and can't stop thinking about it. Harry had called him ' baby' and Louis is stressing about it. Not because he didn't like it but because he did. 

************* 

As they slept til midday, the rest of the day went on Like usual, shower, breakfast, lots of talking, filling the day with an activity of some sort but today there was one thing that changed and it was surely unexpected. 

When 4 pm hit, Louis placed his coffee cup into the sink and walked over to Harry who was currently standing at the fridge trying to find something to munch on. 

" I'm going to head on back to my place for a few hours to get some ideas onto paper for work" 

Harry smiles as Louis smirks. 

" I can come back later on yeah?" 

"Of course" Harry replies. 

Louis leans forward pecking his lips. 

" See you later on then...say 9ish?" 

" Perfect". 

Louis picks up his keys from the table and proceeds to walk out the door. Harry is stuck in his kitchen frozen in disbelief. Harry looks out the window and then to the clock. It's 4 pm and Louis has just made a mistake, Louis has kissed him in the daylight. 

Harry runs his finger across his lip as though trying to work out if that had actually happened or not. 

That begs the question, doesn't it? Was Louis aware of what he had done? or was he also starting to adapt to domestic life with Harry just like Harry was with him? 

***************

A/N 

Thoughts on chapter?

DO YOU THINK EACH OF THEM KNEW WHAT THEY HAD DONE?

# Chapter 11- Beautiful Mistake

The secret of your future is hidden in your daily routine. Depending on what that may be, our habits will either make us or breaks us. If this is anything to go by, then the future for the attached neighbours is starting to look very optimistic.   

Harry who for the last 3 days had pretty much moved in next door, is enjoying every single moment the two of them share and is relishing in this newfound routine of breakfast for two. The days are going by too quickly. Time really does fly by when you're having fun. Since Louis kissed him the other day Harry has decided today is the day he wants to make it clear that their silly little unspoken rule gets disposed of. 

"I'm going to take a shower." 

It's 9:33 AM and Louis is stacking the dishwasher while Harry is currently watching Louis's ass consistently as he continues bending down to stack the dirty plates. Louis unexpectedly feels hands on his hips causing himself to freeze. 

"Did you not hear me? I said I'm going to have a shower" 

The hands around his waist pull him backwards gently grinding Louis's ass against his boner. Harry is waiting for a response but doesn't receive one, so he does it again. This time he feels a little circular rocking motion as Louis presses back down harder begging for more contact. Harry leans down to his ear 

"Clothes off.  The water isn't going to be the only thing making you wet" 

Louis instinctively tilts his head to the side as Harry attacks his neck. Within mere seconds the men have moved to the bathroom where for the first time they are indulging in a bit of R-rated water play. Harry drops to his knees in the shower and Louis can't help but breathe in a breath of fresh relief because 'thank fuck' Louis has been longing for this. He hasn't liked not being able to touch in the daytime just as much as Harry has, but there was no way he would be the one to make the 1st move. 

Louis who is still new to boy on boy is grateful that Harry is experienced and knows what he's doing. Louis likes it that Harry initiates and dominates. While the men are busy pleasing each other in the bathroom, both of them are oblivious to their phones that are continuously ringing downstairs in the kitchen from their wives. If only they knew the importance of the calls. 

By the time they finally step out of the shower and get dressed it's almost 10:45 AM 

"We need to do some grocery shopping" 

Louis continues to stare at the bare fridge that now only contains a bag of carrots and some yoghurt. 

"Yep I stand by what I just said Haz, I can't live off of this." 

Harry walks over reaching into the fridge grabbing a carrot and biting a huge chunk off its end. 

"What's wrong with carrots Lou? Vegetables are good for you, you know. " 

Harry takes another bite deliberately crunching the loudest he can as he laughs. 

"yeah OK true but, I'm only hungry Harry I'm not desperate!" 

Harry laughs shaking his head as he looks around for his car keys. 

"Alright let's go then" 

He goes to walk past Louis who steps in front of him. Harry gives him a questioning look as he raises an eyebrow curiously. Louis pushes up onto his tippy toes connecting their lips and now Harry couldn't care about whether he starves for the next week because shopping is now the furthest thing from his mind, while Louis is suddenly convincing himself that living on carrots wouldn't be so bad after all. 

"Louis Tomlinson you horny little devil. Was that rendezvous in the shower only an hour or so ago not enough? How will I ever keep up with you hmm?" 

"I don't know but I have a sneaky suspicion that you somehow will." 

Resting his head to Louis's forehead he pecks Louis's nose with a kiss quickly before roughly squeezing both of Louis's ass cheeks finishing it off with a slap. 

"Go upstairs and grab a jacket, it's a bit chilly out today. I will wait for you in the car, don't be long." 

Harry smirks turning around with the front door in sight, as he hears Louis's footsteps running up the stairs. 

"No need to be so bossy darling" he yells laughing. 

Harry sits himself down in the driver's seat patting his thighs as he bops along to the song on the radio. He's happy and it's not because it's a one-of-a-kind rock classic but because Louis called him 'darling' and Harry is enjoying the pet name a lot more than he should be because all he can think about right now is how good and natural it sounded and how much he craves to hear it again. 

********* 

Walking around the supermarket Harry is having a hard time trying to control himself. He is often discovering that he is fonding, daydreaming about this everyday life with Louis that he has had the pleasure of experiencing and how his wishing it would never end. 

You see you can't force chemistry between two people where it doesn't exist, in the same way, you can't deny it when it does. Harry forgets where they are for a split second and doesn't think when he grabs Louis's hand interlocking their fingers, while they stood there trying to decide on which type of cheese to choose. A good 45 seconds pass before Harry and Louis realise they are holding hands. 

Louis pulls back instantly letting him go and checking around the aisles in the hopes of not seeing anyone they know. Thankful for Louis the coast is all clear. 

"Shit, Lou I'm sorry. I don't know why I did that" 

It's true. Harry can't explain it but it does hurt a little bit at Louis's reaction, when to Harry.... holding Louis's hand had felt nothing but a natural instinct. 

Harry was not going to let Louis pay for the shopping. The total amount was a £113 

"Harry no, what do you think you're trying to do?" 

Harry has pulled out his wallet whipping out his bank card and swiping it before Louis could object any further. 

"What? I pretty much eat most of the food at your house anyway, it's only fair that I pay for it."  

"If you felt that way you could have paid half then, not the lot." 

Louis isn't angry he's just a little annoyed as he doesn't want Harry to treat him like a charity case and Harry notices straight away the change in his mood. 

"I'm sorry " 

"It's fine" 

The drive home is too quiet and Harry doesn't want the day to turn sour. Harry doesn't even bother with an indicator light and sharply turns a corner, swerving into the opposite direction in which they were supposed to be travelling making a detour, immediately catching Louis's attention. 

" Jesus Harry slow down, what are you doing? Why did you vere off?" 

Harry giggles as Louis jokes around holding on for dear life. Louis can already tell Harry has a plan and he doesn't know whether to be excited or scared. 

Louis has asked Harry now a total of 8 times where they are going and still Harry has yet to answer. They have been driving for a good 40 minutes. 

"We're here." 

Harry pulls into the carpark while Louis scrunches up his face. 

" Is this some kind of joke Harry? Do I look like I'm 5?" 

" Hey, I've always wanted to do this. C'mon it will be fun. " 

Walking into the building the first thing Louis's eyes are drawn to is the massive sign on the wall that is illuminated with big red and blue lettering. 

' Welcome To Build A Bear' 

" I can't believe we're doing this. " 

" How about we make one each separately and surprise each other? " 

The universe wasn't on Louis's side this day as one of the staff workers approach him asking if he needs help using the tablets to pick out his options. 

" Yes, he needs help. I know what I'm doing. See you in a bit" 

Harry takes off leaving Louis standing alongside the staff member who doesn't look a day older than 20. 

" Ok, so where do we start then?" He asks the young man. 

Louis cannot believe the amount of time and effort that goes into making these bears. Getting to choose his own bear, getting to fill it with stuffing, choosing its clothing, naming it, no wonder all the children in here are smiling and having a great time. 

When he has finally finished, with a much needed thank you to the boy helping him, he sees Harry waiting for him back at the exit door with his hands behind his back. Not wanting Harry to see his work of art he to decides to place it out of sight. 

" Let me see Let me see" Harry demands and Louis thinks Harrys spent too much time in here already by his new apparent childish tone. 

" After you Hazza" 

Harry as proud as he is of his new creation whips out his bear as Louis bursts out laughing.  

" Louis meet 'Rainbow bear' " 

Harry's bear is not just one colour it's multiple. There's a mixture of pink, yellow, and purple and Harry is grinning so wide from the amusement on Louis's face because this is it. This is the happy smiley Lou he always loves to see. 

" Harry, what the fuck have you done? Is that bear ...no wait...Is that bondage wear?" 

Harry turns the bear back towards himself bursting out into laughter. 

"It was just supposed to be leather clothing but now you have said that I can't see anything different!" 

Some other children around the place were starting to give the two men some weird looks as they watched on at the sound of their horrendous laughter. 

" My god Harry that's not Rainbow Bear, from now on his name is RBB" 

" RBB?" Harry questions.  

" Yes, Harold. Rainbow Bondage Bear" 

When the two decide to finally calm down, Harry looks over Louis's shoulder. 

" Let's see it then, where's yours?" 

Louis purses his lips tight together and tries his hardest not to break because the kid standing not too far away looks like he's ready to kick them both out. 

Sometimes when two people are just so right for each other, something magical can happen. They tune in to each other and have a sixth sense about the person. They start to synchronise.  Louis pulls out his teddy and Harry loses his shit. Louis grabs him by the arm dragging him out the door into the parking lot. 

" Fucking hell Louis, yours is exactly like mine but smaller. What the fuck. Great minds think alike hey" 

Louis's jaw is extremely sore from smiling as he watches Harry laugh so hard but it's a good scene to endure because there's nothing more in this world that Louis loves watching more than Harry's dimples. 

Getting back into the car, Louis can't believe that teddy bears of all things, has made his day so exciting and fun. 

**************
"Fancy a beer? " 

" When have you ever known me to knock back a beer?...of course I want one." 

" Mr sassy pants tonight are we?" 

Harry cracks open the bottle watching Louis put on a jumper before turning back to him. 

" You wanna sit outside? " 

" Sure. " 

The night sky is dark. There's a few twinkling stars glowing between the many clouds. It's cold out but bearable but Louis still doesn't understand how Harry is just in a shirt and shorts when he himself was still shivering. 

" I will be right back" Louis states as he disappears back inside the house. 

Harry looks around his backyard and finds it a tiny bit funny that he hasn't been here for a while. After spending so many days couped up at Louis's place, as he now eyes his backyard it occurs to him how odd it feels being back here. He frowns as he wonders why that is. Hopefully, Harry isn't as naive and will soon connect the dots that maybe it's because his home is longer a place but a certain person. 

Louis returns no soon later re joining Harry at the pool's bar, adding another coat on top of his existing jumper. 

" My god it's chilly tonight. " 

Harry gets up off the stall, walking over to the outdoor patio heater lighting it up to create some heat. He walks around the side of the house and Louis hears what sounds like a little motor start humming. 

Harry pulls back the tarp that is covering the hot tub. 

" Well let's warm you up then. " 

Louis loves a hot tub. He doesn't even hesitate. He rips everything off to his boxers and jumps right in. It's still slowly getting warm so the initial quick change of body temperature didn't bother him too much. It doesn't take long for the hot tub to become steamy and bubbly and no sooner Harry is joining him. 

" I should have brought my beer in here. Dam it.. " 

Louis laughs meaning it as a joke but watches Harry immediately jump out going over to the table and collecting it for him. Harry hands him the beer gliding himself back into the water. Harry is sat opposite Louis and for the next hour, they do nothing but talk about all sorts of crap and continuously down beers just enjoying each other's company. 

Louis is getting hot. His cheeks have flushed and his pretty sure his drunk and even though he is sitting down he feels like his head is floating. He's not sure if it's all because he's been in the tub too long or whether the amount of alcohol he has had is starting to affect him. 

What he does know, is that Harry who is topless is looking very appetising. Louis is so lost in Harry that he finds himself gawking. There's a hunger evident all over his face as he licks his lips and Harry has picked up on his desire as the two stare silently at each across from the tub.  

The water is bubbling around them fiercely and Louis can't wait any longer. 

■■■ Slight Smut ■■■ 

Louis drifts across the tub ever so slowly as Harry watches on his eyes full of lust as he knows what's happening. Louis rests his arms on each side of Harry behind him on the tub to gently sit down on Harry's lap straddling him. 

Harry's mouth falls wide open when he goes to wrap his arms around his waist feeling nothing but skin. Louis smirks knowing Harry is surprised at his lack of boxers which he had removed earlier on when he made Harry fetch him a beer. 

Just as Louis moves to kiss him Harry moans into his mouth. 

" You little minx, fuck Lou. How do you make me so hard so fucking quickly all the time?" 

It's not a question that needs to be answered. Hearing his deep husky voice sends Louis into an erotic bliss. Tonight however is different. Louis isn't moving too fast. He kisses his favourite spot near Harry's ear before licking a long strip up his neck sucking a deep purple bruise, all while Harry has tilted his head backwards moaning at the pleasure it's caused.  

Under the water, Louis starts tugging at Harry's shorts to remove them. The moment it's only skin on skin Louis takes Harry's cock into his hand slowly stroking him. Harry moves to grab Louis's ass cheeks and finds a pleasant surprise. 

" Fuck, do you have a butt pl - " 

Louis shooshes Harry by holding his finger over his lips before bending down and pressing his tongue inside his mouth slowly but sensually as they tenderly explore and taste each other. 

Harry can't explain the goosebumps he feels when his in hot water. Louis has a warm fuzzy feeling in the pit of his stomach and fuck Louis has realised this is not just sex. It's intimate. He feels a connection with Harry like no other and it's driving him into a euphoric kind of happiness that he never felt before. 

" I did it so that I'm already prepped for you, now get inside of me, please. I really need you right now Harry." 

There's something different in the way Louis pleads for Harry's closeness which makes Harry's heart melt. He doesn't want to make Louis wait any longer, still holding onto his ass cheeks he spreads them apart discarding the plug and lifting him slightly before lowering him down carefully and slowly onto his cock. 

Louis doesn't break eye contact the entire time as he adjusts to Harry being fully inside him. Louis uses a hand to caress Harry's chest before holding him tightly behind the back of his neck. 

Louis circles his hips listening to Harry moan. Lifting himself up lightly off Harry's length Louis pushes back down with a little more force. Harry's hands are now firmly on Louis's waist as he guides Louis's delicate bounces. 

Louis again presses his lips to Harry's as he continues to ride him. Harry knows he isn't going to last too much longer when Louis's hand grabs Harry's hair pulling it out from the bun it had been tied in. 

Louis pulls Harry's hair prompting Harry's head to fall back against the tub's edge leaving Louis the opportunity to again plant kisses along his neck and jawline. Louis places his mouth next to Harry's ear and whispers. 

" You like this don't ya Haz, feeling every inch of my tight walls. You fucking love it, but don't worry darling I love it even more" 

That was it for Harry. He almost spilled at Louis's sinful words. He starts to gently thrust inside of Louis grabbing his cock and pumping Louis in sync. 

" Cum with me baby" Harry pants. 

Louis instantly senses his impending release, soon feeling his load escaping his slit as he hits his high. It's not exactly the same time but close enough for Harry, who shoots his cum inside of Louis filling him completely. 

■■■ END of Smut■■■ 

Louis leans forward giving Harry one last kiss. When their lips parted green eyes and blue eyes stared intensely at each other both knowing that, the sex they just had was far from being "just sex." 

Sometimes it's not just sex that we crave but rather intimacy. To be admired, and touched, to feel completely safe with another while in our most vulnerable state. Even though Louis tried and tried to refrain from anything other than 'just sex' He has failed miserably. 

Harry stays put in the tub while he watches Louis. 

" I'm just gonna pop on over home quickly and freshen up."  

Removing himself from the tub he collects a towel tying it around his waist. Walking over to the back door Louis can feel a thick warm liquid oozing from his hole and he squeezes his eyes closed shut for a few seconds as he realises the mistake they have just made.  

Mistakes. We all make them. It's impossible to go through life not making any. Sometimes we may make a mistake that's bigger than others and sometimes, we can make a mistake that is going to affect not only ourselves but all our loved ones as well. Depending on who you ask, some might even say that in life, we don't make " mistakes"  but rather 
" Happy little accidents". 

One night. 
One moment of lust.
One beautiful mistake.
One life-changing experience!! 

*****************

A/N 

Attention, a friendly heads up. 

There's

 only one more chapter until the wives return!!!! 

Things are soon set to change. 

What do you think is going to happen when the wives return? 

I'm

 actually nervous to see all your responses to what I have planned in the following few chapters. Please 

don't

 hate me, trust the 

process

. 

♡♡♡

# Chapter 12 - The Talk

There used to be a time when Harry could do this. Lay beside him and cuddle, while not feeling anything more than the contentment of unconditional friendship. Looking at Louis who is stretched out next to him while he sleeps, he knows that this is now no longer the case. 

Harry knows he's running out of time. It's not much longer until their wives return. Harry watches his own hand that is rested on Louis's forearm who is faced away from him, his thumb creating little circles as he caresses his skin. 

In a short couple of days, everything is going to change. He will no longer feel the warmth beside him at night or his overall softness, he will no longer smell his nice vanilla Scent that radiates off his entire body. He will no longer be able to run his hands through his soft Beachy hair. He won't be able to hear Louis's dainty little snores or listen to the air that he breathes through his nose when he first falls asleep. He won't be able to feel those cold toes shoved under his legs in the middle of the night when Louis becomes restless and tries to get warm. The one that he dreads missing the most... is that he won't hear "Goodnight Harry" anymore.  

Time is ticking. Harry is having a hard time trying to get to sleep. He knows that he needs to talk to Louis. Try and be brave enough to confess how he feels, to see if there is any slight chance, any at all, that Louis may feel the same way about him because Harry has realised Louis is the one for him ..not Lexi.. him. His best friend, his soul mate. The only one he thinks of when he first wakes up in the morning, and when he showers when he cleans the house when he tries to do anything really and he is undoubtedly the last person Harry sees when he closes his eyes before falling asleep..... it's always Louis.   

But he is scared, he is pretty sure that Louis doesn't reciprocate the same feelings. He has a wife that he clearly loves and adores. Harry knows this. He knows that Louis was just being adventurous trying out new things, which he was OK with because he was the one who got to share that experience with him. It doesn't stop that feeling of wanting it to be something more even when he knows it's not really possible. 

Harry shifts a little bit closer to Louis inadvertently spooning him from behind. He wraps his arm around him his hand gripping Louis's chest tightly. He doesn't want to let him go. He lays there for a few minutes savouring every moment. 

Louis has been sleeping for a couple of hours and starts to stir at Harry's slightest movements. Using his other hand that is laying behind Louis's head on the pillow, he bends his hand to gently run his fingers tentatively throughout his hair. It comforts Louis who immediately falls back into a deep sleep. 

Harry closes his eyes in an attempt to finally switch off his thoughts, he tries to fall asleep, and he tries to push his feelings to the back of his mind. No matter what he does nothing seems to work as he just lays there, not wanting to waste any more of the short time he has left because he has become too used to this. This gorgeous petite body next to him each night. 

Harry's big heart.......has got to use to loving his best friend. 

It only feels like minutes pass when Harry finally falls asleep when he is suddenly woken. It annoys him cos it's the best freaking dream his had in ages. He starts to stir not yet opening his eyes when he felt what feels like a mouth pressing kisses to his thigh. Nope, Harry convinces himself his still half asleep because his dream was somewhat similar. But there it was again followed by a mouth skimming the top of his boxers over his cock. 

He opens his eyes pulling up the blanket and looking downwards, coming face to face with the most beautiful set of ocean coloured eyes. 

" Good morning " Louis smirks. 

harry falls back down trying to convince himself that he hadn't died and gone to heaven. 

" May I?"  Louis asks. 

Harry chuckles 

" You may do whatever your heart desires Tomlinson." 

" Mmm ...really " Louis says devilishly. 

After a bit of foreplay and a good pounding, Harry decides he doesn't want to do anything today. 

" Do you have any plans for today Lou?" 

" No maybe a bit of work on my book for a little bit, then I'm all yours. Why?" 

" I was thinking of just chilling out today. Maybe some movies and a bite to eat." 

" Sounds great to me. " 

The day goes by quickly and true to their word they don't do much at all. 
They have watched movie after movie and laughed after laugh. As Harry watches Louis throw the popcorn in the air catching it in his mouth, he realised that his idea of a perfect day has nothing to do with the weather or any type of activity. His perfect day is just spending time with him. 

Of course, there was a lot of cuddling involved as Louis clung to Harry like a koala. He found himself watching Harry sporadically instead of the screen which was ok because he preferred that view anyhow. Louis squeezed Harry tight as they curled up on the couch, he didn't know why at the time but felt the strong need to.  
Louis learnt a very valuable lesson this day. There is more power in a good strong hug than in a thousand powerful words. 

By early evening the boys had worn themselves out, yes by doing nothing. Starring at a screen and indulging in junk food all day has made them want to retire to bed a lot earlier than usual and by 8.30 pm they find themselves moving to the bedroom.  

*******
With both of them laying flat on their backs staring at the ceiling Harry is in deep thought about whether now is the perfect time to have " The Talk" to bare his heart and lay it all out on the table. He goes to open his mouth but nothing comes out. He frowns to himself. All day he has rehearsed what it is that he has wanted to say but now that the time has come the words just simply don't want to leave his mouth. 

Louis oblivious to Harry's ongoing fight between his thoughts is thinking about something entirely different. We know that because his words have no problem coming out, he just doesn't know why they were these ones. 

" So the girls get back soon. How do you feel about seeing Lexi again? " 

It feels weird hearing their wife's names out loud to both of them, Lexi and Elly had somewhat been forgotten about over the last month and Harry couldn't help but shiver at the sound. 

" Yeah, I guess they do." 

Harry says just that, nothing more nothing less. Louis notices he doesn't address the Lexi part and knowing him as well as he does, he doesn't push it any further, opting to turn away from Harry to face the outside of the bed. 

Unknown to Harry Louis has been fighting his own battle. Fighting against his own head and heart because Louis has really enjoyed this time with Harry way more than he ever imagined. If you had told Louis a month ago he was going to sleep with his best friend and love it, he would have laughed at you in the face. 

Spending all this time with Harry has ignited feelings about him too that Louis can't hide from. He is scared though, cheating on his wife, kissing his best friend, sleeping with the said best friend, the general thought of now having had sex with another man, it's a lot for him to process and it's causing mixed emotions. 

He has had so much fun these last 4 weeks and his felt a shift in chemistry with Harry that he can't explain but he likes it, it excites him because Harry somehow whenever he touches Louis, it sets his mind body and soul on fire but in the same breath, he misses his wife Elly that he has always loved and still loves. 

Harry assuming Louis must be ready for sleep leans over turning off the lamp. The moment the light goes out is a moment Harry is about to regret. 

" Harry" 

" Mhmm" 

" Do you think it's possible to love two people at the same time?" 

Harry starts picking at the sheet while contemplating on how to answer. His heart is going a million miles an hour because is this about him? Does Louis think he loves him? Just the thought alone makes Harry's lip curl in happiness but to play it safe he decides to close that thought off not wanting to get his hopes up. 

" Honestly Lou, I don't know. I guess it's possible." 

Harry really really wants to ask why but he doesn't want to push it in case 
this conversation is about something entirely different and he ends up making himself look like an idiot. Harry decides to further try to justify his answer. 

" I mean, I think you can love two different people at the same time but it can't be at the same level you know. Like, if you really loved the first person you wouldn't have fallen for the second." 

He feels Louis let out a soft sigh before he rolls back facing Harry snuggling in close. There's just enough light beaming in from outside allowing Louis to see, as he starts tracing along the outline of one of Harry's tattoo's on his arm as the room returns to silence. 

Today has been a dream. Perfect from start to finish and Harry is secretly brainstorming ideas on how to keep the wives away for another month more. 

" Do you believe in soul mates?" 

For some reason, Harry's first thought was to lie and say no. When the two of them had first met many years ago Harry had always known deep within that they would endure a close knit relationship just by their initial first meeting.  A special kind of bond that not only had he never experienced before but felt in his inner soul was never going to leave.  

" I do, yes." 

Louis is quick to rebut. 

" Of course, you would, I don't know about it personally, like what even is a soul mate truly? Just something made up for romantic fairytales." 

Harry runs his hand through Louis's scuffled hair as he stares off into the darkness. 

" No Lou, I think it's sort of like having a best friend but it's a give and take of a little bit more. The one person who knows you more than anyone else. That same person inspires you to become a better version of yourself. It's someone knowing the real you and accepting you fully even if no one else would. It's knowing that whatever happens in life whether that be for the good or the bad that you will always have them beside you matter what and nothing nor anyone will ever be able to change that. " 

Harry is snapped out of his little trance by the movement of Louis jumping up and out of the bed. 

" Are you ok Lou?" 

" Yep, I'm fine. I'm just gonna have a quick shower. Do you um...mind staying at home tonight I..um.. have an early start I have a work call to attend to in the morning. You mind letting yourself out?" 

Louis doesn't wait for a reply. He quickly walks into the ensuite closing the door and slides down the wall to the floor because Louis is definitely not ok. Harry's words have hit him like a freight train. 

Screwing around with Harry in his eyes was only supposed to be a bit of fun until Elly got back and now there are all these new feelings towards Harry that his totally confused about and has him completely petrified. He has a wife he is committed to who he thought he loved solely. He has that ultimate dream in life, a house, a wife a job and now it feels like it's all up in the air. 

Louis has realised he is in fact bisexual and he's not sure how to explain it to anyone, hell he doesn't want to tell anyone. Scared. Louis is scared because as he sits there alone on the floor, his heart is pounding rapidly because Louis has just had an epiphany. 

Louis is 100% in love with Harry. 

He hears a knock on the door. 

" Lou, please let me in." 

Harry who's so in touch, has that gut feeling that Louis isn't ok. He wants to check on him. He wants to make sure there's nothing wrong. The door slowly opens and one look at Louis and Harry sees it. He feels it. It's time for the talk. 

" I'm happy to leave and go home Lou but I think we really need to sit and have a chat first. " 

Louis walks past Harry and sits on the bed with Harry not far behind following suit. 

" I don't know how the hell to start this and I know it's a little weird but I'm just gonna say it....I really like you, Louis. I REALLY like you. " 

Louis covers his face with his hands while Harry observes the tapping of Louis's foot. His scared. 

" Harry, please. I can't talk about this." 

" I'm sorry. I just need to tell you how I feel. Yes, the girls are due to come home in a couple of days but I just need to ask Lou in case there's any chance that you and I ...that we...I want more..I want..." 

Louis stands up and starts pacing the room erratically. His stress level is through the roof. Louis may have only just admitted his feelings minutes ago to himself in the bathroom but now that Harry has brought it up he can't think straight. 

" You want what Harry ?" Louis snaps. 

He doesn't mean to but his adrenalin is rushing throughout him as he feels the start of a panic attack approaching. 

" I want you, Louis. I just want you." 

Louis stops in his tracks looking over at Harry who's seated on the bed, his head lowered to the floor. 

" I love Elly. She's my wife Harry. I made a commitment to her, til death do us part. I can't go back on my word. I wouldn't do that. Yes I have cheated, and yes I have betrayed her but I can't leave her. I love her. " 

Silence. 

" What about me?" Harry softly speaks, the hurt evident in his cracked words. 

" It was just sex, Harry. It was only meant to be just that. You knew this. I mean I enjoyed our time together Harry I really have and I'm truly grateful but you knew it was never going to amount to anything serious right? " 

Louis is hurt. He knows his hurting him because he too is hurting himself. He didn't think when starting this whole ordeal that feelings would be caught and now his scared of losing his best friend. 

" So what was I then? An experiment to you, to just see if you liked boys, just a replacement til Elly got back? What about us Louis? Our walks, our dates, our snuggles, all the fun we had. All our late-night talking. What was it all nothing?" Harry shouts. 

He too stands walking over to glare out the bedroom window. Louis knows Harry is right. They have connected but he can't be with him. Louis knows that staying with his wife is the right thing to do even if it isn't what he wants anymore. Louis hates himself because he does love Harry but he knows they can't be together it's too complicated, so why prolong the inevitable.  

" I don't want you in that way, Harry. " 

There it was. Did you hear it? The heart is a very strong muscle and when something affects us so deeply that the pain we feel inside ourselves, can make you feel like your heart has physically broken in two. 

" You don't mean that. You are lying. I know you, Louis. You can feel this connection between us just as much as me. " 

Louis can hear Harry's heartache. He can see the tears pooling in his eyes. Louis wants nothing more than to pull him in and tell him his correct and that he does want him but he can't. 

Louis looks around picking up his phone and keys. 

'I'm gonna go for a walk. Lock the door on the way out." 

Harry stares him down. All the hurt has been pushed aside as anger has set in. 

" You can't even admit it out loud can you huh !! Say it out loud, C'mon!! look me in the fucking eye and tell me you don't want me anymore, that what we have is all in my head. " 

Harry places himself directly in front of Louis only inches from his face. 

" See you can't do it. But No worries Louis, do what you do best. Runaway." 

That infuriates Louis who finally snaps. 

You know the old saying 
'when you are angry, stay silent' 

Louis really should have listened because you should always be careful with your words, as when they have left your mouth, they can only be forgiven not forgotten. 

" I get that you no longer love your fucking wife and that walking away from that type of commitment must be so dam easy for you to do but just because you have a shitty fucking marriage doesn't mean I'm not happy with mine. !!!" 

Silence. 

Louis has never yelled at Harry before, hell the two have never even fought like this before. Harry who hasn't moved or said a word is surely in shock. Louis walks over to the desk placing his hands down, lowering his head in disappointment at himself. 

" I'm sorry. I wish I could tell you what you want to hear Harry but I can't. I'm sorry. " 

Louis slowly proceeds to leave stopping at the door way his back to Harry. He wants to stay. He doesn't want things to end this way but he needs air. No, he needs a drink and a fucking smoke to hell with all those months clean. A fucking smoke sounds perfect right now. He just about moves when he hears Harry sobbing.  

" I love you, Lou." 

He freezes. Tears now in his own eyes but that only makes him want out of there faster. 

For the final time ever.......
Louis.... walks out on Harry. 

**********

A/N 

SOOO....

Do I need to remind you, I 

said

 last chapter not to hate me. :) 

yeah, so how is the weather ? 

Hahaha.
 

Serious note:

Thoughts on this chapter ? 

What do you think is happening next ? 

Who do feel more sorry for?

# Chapter 13 - Return

Harry is living by the motto that if you can't be happy.... well at least you can be drunk. It's been 48 hours since he last saw Louis. Harry has never drunk so much alcohol at once in his entire life. No soon as his bottle is finished, it's quickly replaced with another. 

Sitting down at the kitchen table with a scotch in hand. He leans forward resting his head in his crossed arms on the table. The problem with drinking so much is that it causes Harry to overthink. His life, his choices, his existence. The one thing he has concluded on is this. 

There are about 3 different ways to die faster. 
1. He can continue drinking alcohol daily, not only does it block out some pain for a short period but it can also knock 10 years off your life over time.
2. Smoke. Smoke and smoke some more. Studies have shown it may lessen your life by 30 years. 
3. And this is the route Harry has decided is the most effective method. Love someone who doesn't love you back, that way, you die over and over every single day.  

The moment he feels that familiar pool of emotions building in his eyes once again, he stands promptly skulling the liquor and searching the cupboard and fridge for alcohol. There's nothing. It infuriates him as he knows his in no state to be driving anywhere to get any more. He needs more, he can't function at the moment without any because right now, alcohol tastes a whole lot better than tears. 

It's only 3 pm in the afternoon and yet Harry's house is in darkness. The curtains have been drawn closed, the Smell of smoke is lingering and there's empty bottles lying everywhere. He doesn't think it's going to work but he's going to try anyway. Opening up his phone he sends Louis another text message. 

To Louis: 
" Please Lou, don't ignore me. I miss you" 

After 20 minutes with no reply, Harry picks up an empty bottle throwing it across the kitchen, the sound of smashing glass echoing throughout the empty house. For the last 2 days, Harry has texted and called and not once has Louis replied. Not a word, not one fucking word. 

Harry is flicking from angry to hurt to sad, to eventually settling on vindictive. He wants sex, the urge to release all this frustration and sadness and the sweet memory of a certain bartender is filling his desire for a revenge fuck. He doesn't know why he wants this, Louis has made it clear he doesn't want him, so why he feels the need to try and make him jealous really makes no sense at all. 

It's funny how the universe works in mysterious ways sometimes. Just as he was trying to figure out ways of transport to the winery, Harry hears the sounds of the front door unlocking. He walks quickly to the door, his drunk state of mind convincing himself it was Louis and not the logical explanation of who really had a key. 

" Harry! It's really good to see you aga- " Lexi pauses taking a deep sniff. 

" Why does the house smell like smoke and..." 

Harry has had enough of her talking already. He eyes her up and down and internally feels relieved as the craving he just wanted can now be fulfilled. She may not be a man and exactly what he felt he wanted but standing there in her little tight white skirt with a black singlet was enough for him to be satisfied with. Lexi smelt good but it wasn't the scent he longed for. He wanted comfort but unfortunately, it was to be in the wrong arms. 

He doesn't even say hello to her. He grabs the bags that are hanging over her arms and drops them to the floor, picking her up and flinging her over his shoulder. Lexi laughs and Harry carries her as he hurries upstairs. 

He takes no time undressing himself and her. Lexi is beyond happy as she hasn't touched her husband in months since she had the miscarriage and he moved into the guest room. 
Harry is acting like an animal, ripping her clothes, moving fast and Lexi takes a minute to try and slow it down. 

" I missed you too Harry." 

All Lexi wants to hear is for him to say it back. She has missed her husband and now finally she's starting to believe that Harry too had realised on their time apart that maybe absence does make the heart grow fonder. 

Harry doesn't respond. It's now as Harry is towering over her as he plants kisses around her breasts that she gets a good strong scent of the alcohol. 

" Harry are you drunk? Are you ok?  

Again, there's nothing. Harry acts like he hasn't even heard her, deciding that if he was going to fuck her, he couldn't face her. He rolls her over onto her stomach grabbing her hips pulling her up onto her knees. As he slowly pushes into her vagina Harry tilts his head backwards closing his eyes, putting everything he has into imagining it's Louis. 

Poor Harry, he has no idea how much the decision he has just made, is about to come back to haunt him in the worst possible way later on.  

*********** 

In the house, next door Louis has taken a different approach to their time apart. He hasn't moved from his home office, having spent hours on end writing. It's keeping his mind focused and is distracting himself from the guilt he feels for treating Harry the way he did. 

Hearing his phone ding again he stops to read the text that he knows will be from Harry.  He wants to reply. He wants to apologise.  To hell, he wants to kiss him but he knows he can't anymore. He is preparing himself for Elly's return and understands trying to rid Harry from his thoughts is what he needs even if it isn't what he wants. 

Besides working Louis has spent all his time sleeping. His guessing the amount of alcohol, sex, endless days exploring places with Harry and all the late nights have finally caught up with him. He can't seem to stay awake for long periods of time without needing a nap. 

Speaking of a nap Louis lays down on the lounge deciding to rest his eyes for what he believes to be only 10 minutes. 

He feels his arm being shaken. 
" Louis babe, wake up" 

Squinting open an eye he sees Elly smiling back down at him. Sitting up he rubs his eyes and stretches as he makes grabby arms towards her. 

" I'm back baby. I have missed you. Did u miss me ? " she asks as she falls down into his lap throwing her legs to the side so he cradles her. 

" I did very much. What are you doing back so early? I thought it was another few days until you arrived home?" 

" Well Lexi and I both tried calling you but you guys never answered. We were trying to let you know we had to change flights because of the storm that was brewing, have you not watched the news?" 

" No sorry been busy with writing. Did you at least have a good time?" 

Elly starts to talk his ear off about all the wonderful activities her and Lexi experienced and as he watches her eyes twinkle about how much she enjoyed herself the guilt starts to flow throughout him. This causes him to start zoning out, his pretending to listen because he can't stop thinking now about whether he should come clean or not about Harry. 

" Glad you had a great time. Are you hungry at all? I haven't prepared anything but I can get some takeout if you like?" 

" Yes, please. Just something lite I've eaten wayyy too much in the last month so something a little bit healthy if you can. While you do that, I'm gonna take a shower " 

Louis nods and fetches his phone from his office. Looking out the window at the house beside him he keeps wondering how Harry must be feeling having Lexi back around knowing how much he doesn't want her anymore and the anxiety it must be giving him. He just prays Harry is at least being a little bit nice to her. If only Louis knew exactly how pleasing he was being. 

*************
An alarm? The beeping sound that he hadn't heard for some time was now blaring as Louis rolled over to see Elly reaching out to shut it off. 

" Why exactly are you getting up so early?" 

" I'm going back to work today" 

" What !?" Louis snaps a little. " You only just got back yesterday." 

" I know. I have so much to catch up on." 

After dinner last night both Louis and Elly were tired. Only seconds after they jumped into bed they both passed out from exhaustion. Besides the brief cuddle when she arrived home Louis hasn't had the chance to barely touch her. 

While Elly is getting dressed after her shower Louis stumbles down into the kitchen to make Elly some oats with some cut up fresh fruits. Pouring himself a coffee, Elly enters the room her sunglasses on her head, handbag over her shoulder. 

" Oh babe that's very sweet of you but I'm in a hurry. I will see you later on tonight." 

Elly plants a kiss to Louis's lips and no sooner or later the sound of the front door closing pisses him off. He had only just gotten her back and she was gone already. He sighs heavily as he looks around the house. It's in desperate need of a clean. 

Picking up the vacuum he starts to tidy everything but it's kind of hard as everywhere he looks, there's something reminding him of Harry. The lounge where they watched movies, the swimming pool outside, his bed, the kitchen where Harry pinned him against the wall. Trying not to think of Harry was proving to be more difficult than he first imagined. 

For the next 4 days, it kind of feels like groundhog day. The same pattern of routine over and over. Elly has buried herself into work and Louis is finding it difficult to try an even catch a glimpse of her at all. Life fell back into the same boring old pattern as it was prior to the holiday. Elly was gone when he woke up and Louis ate dinner alone as for the second night in a row, she's stuck in the office and won't be home ' til late'. 

Louis misses conversation. 
He misses the hugs, the laughs, and having fun. He misses the green eyes and dimples. 
He misses Harry. 

************ 

Harry has been in a daydream for the last week. Lexi has noticed Harry's drinking problem and when she asked about it Harry snapped at her. What she has learnt over the years is when Harry gets into a mood is to just step back and give him space. If and when he wants to talk to her about it he will. She knows not to push him too much as he closes off completely. 

" Harry, I know things were rocky when I left but now....." 

Harry pushes back the kitchen chair walking to put his plate into the sink. Lexi has tried and tried to get Harry to talk to her but she's only getting the minimal answers. Lexi wants to know what it is that has her husband so clearly upset. 

Like every other night after dinner, Harry retires to his room not to be seen until the following morning. Lexi doesn't know how to fix it but she knows someone who might. 

********** 

Finally, it's a Thursday night and Louis is amazed that Elly returned home from work at 5 pm.  After her shower, he notices that Elly isn't in her normal night attire instead a long floral dress. 

" I'm sorry babe, are we going somewhere that I've forgotten?" Louis questions. 

" No, but we are expecting company" 

" What! Who ? " 

The doorbell interrupts his questions as Elly smiles at him. 

" Harry and Lexi are coming over for drinks, the four of us haven't been together for a while. It was Lexi's idea" 

Louis is frozen. He doesn't want this to happen, it's been almost 2 weeks since their argument and it makes him nervous at the thought of seeing him again. Elly opens the door and Louis can hear Harry's voice as he greets her. 

Louis takes a deep breath as the neighbours enter on through to the kitchen. Lexi puts the wine bottle down onto the counter engulfing Louis into a hug. 

" Hey you, long time no see. " 

Louis finds this action extremely bizarre as the two do not normally see eye to eye but he plays along anyway. 

" Nice to see you again Lexi. " 

Over the next hour the four of them sit closely around the island bench sipping wine and eating the crackers Elly insisted on. For the majority of the time, both men sat quietly listening to their wife's adventures that they endured around New York. Harry hasn't addressed Louis and Louis has barely even looked Harry's way. It feels odd for the pair who only weeks ago were making love, not awkward glances. 

" So boys, what did you two get up to while we were away ?" Elly smiles flickering her eyes between Harry and Louis. 

Louis stiffens not knowing how to address anything. Harry shifts a little in his seat and realises it's going to have to be him to speak as Louis shows no attempt at talking. 

" Kept busy, nothing important. " 

The words hit Louis's heart and he knows he deserves the blow. He can hear the hurt in his tone so he doesn't want to leave it at that. 

"  We had fun. A lot of fun. Harry was great company. I'm glad we got to spend some quality time together. " 

" Oh that's beautiful, you guys are too cute." Elly mocks. 

Oblivious as Elly seems, Lexi is taking note of the unusual silence between them. Where there used to be a countless amount of banter and laughs has been replaced with quietness and sadness. 

Louis looks to Harry who is staring at the bench in front of him. 

" I'm gonna go have a smoke. Excuse me ladies" Harry stands and exits out through the sliding door. 

Louis thinks for a moment about whether joining him is a good idea. He makes the decision quickly, following behind him. 

While Harry puffs a smoke, Louis takes it from his mouth inhaling it as Harry shakes his head. His not angry that he started again but more disappointed that he knows he was probably the cause for it. 

" Look Harry I'm sorry ok. I...I miss you alright, our friendship, I miss our friendship. " 

Harry internally screams. He doesn't have much of a choice, so being friends with Louis and nothing more is better than not having him at all. 

" I'm sorry too, let's just pretend nothing happened. It meant nothing anyway" 

Louis doesn't like hearing it like that. 

" Harry" 

Harry turns his body to fully face him. 

" No Lou you were right all along. I shouldn't have ever had any hopes of being with you. It was wrong. Everything was a mistake. A big fucking mistake." 

Louis can't tolerate it anymore. 

" Harry listen to me. What we did, what we had, it was not a mistake. I'm sorry if you feel like I used you or whatever but I asked for it. I told you if you were going to play around to use me. I had fun Harry, too much fun if I'm honest. I really like you haz but if things were different, if we didn't have 2 wives sitting inside who rely and depend on us who we made an oath to, I wouldn't hesitate being with you. " 

Harry stands there staring in silence into Louis's radiating blue eyes. 

" It's not that I don't want you Haz, because trust me when I say, I've missed you terribly, it's just I can't leave Elly. I'm sorry." 

There he said it out loud to Harry that he wants him. It wasn't a mistake. But it doesn't change the situation that they are all in. Louis just hopes that telling Harry this has given him some sort of assurance that it wasn't his fault and that his sorry and that what they shared wasn't " not important " as he had specified earlier. 

" Friends?" That is all Harry can say because if he tries to say anything else his going to cry. 

" Friends" Louis mimics back. 

Harry doesn't hesitate about pulling into him a hug. Sometimes when you don't know what words to say, a simple hug says it all. Neither would admit it, but it's not a ' simple' hug because when their bodies reconnected after all this time apart, they both felt the stress escape, their sadness disappears and how it felt so right being back in each other's arms. 

When Louis pulled back first Harry felt relieved but he still couldn't shake the fact that he was still going to have to try and move on from a broken heart.....but that was going to be a lot easier than trying to move on from a broken friendship. 

Harry and Louis felt somewhat whole again. 
But for how long? Not very long at all, it seems as if fate is about to step in, in a way none of them were expecting. 

Another week from now and both of them are about to have their worlds come tumbling down because 
Louis has a secret
Lexi has a secret 
Elly has a secret
while Harry styles is just caught up in the middle of it all.  

***************

A/N

Thoughts on chapter? 

I'm

 sorry about the Hexi sex scene ( Harry and lexi ) 

I

 needed it to happen for a further storyline.

This was more of a filler chapter. Sorry.  

Also sorry about any grammar mistakes. I havent had time to proof read ! 

♡♡♡

# Chapter 14 - Pregnant

There is some sort of magic in the 
' unexpected ' things in life. It's true. Sometimes what your looking for comes, when you are not expecting it at all. 

Louis has vomited for the 3rd time today. After brushing his teeth and cleaning his mouth once again he just wants to jump into bed, it's the only place he wants to stay today. Louis hates getting sick, it's times like these he wishes his family was still around. 

He opens up his laptop tuning into Netflix. Wanting something different he decides on a Rom-Com and immediately regrets it. Louis has never cried at a romantic comedy in his life so he doesn't understand why when the main character dies and the dog is left all alone Louis bursts out into tears. He feels really off. His only rational theory is to blame the flu he seems to have. 

Harry had sent a message last night asking if they could catch up over a coffee and now Louis has to cancel. Not feeling the best, he decides to just text instead of calling. Harry replied with a one worded response of 'really?' Louis is sure Harry must have thought Louis was playing sick just to get out of seeing him, thinking he has gone back to avoiding him and if that was only true, Louis wouldn't be running once again to the bathroom. 

Upon returning to the bed, Louis can understand why Harry may have misinterpreted his text. Thinking it's funny he opens the camera on the phone and takes a picture of how awful he looks. His cheeks are red and blotchy from vomiting, his eyes are puffy from crying about the stupid movie, and he literally looks like death warmed up. He tries pulling a funny face adding the caption : 
' Not lying, see I look terrible' 

From Harry:
" Oh shit. What's wrong? Do you need anything? Are you ok?" 

Louis smirks at Harry's fussing. 
Harry didn't reply with what he wanted to say. He had initially typed 
" What are you talking about, you still look beautiful " but quickly deleted it. You know because of the whole friends only thing. So he had settled for something short instead. 

To Harry :
" Don't worry about it, I'm superman! Just wish I could hold something down. I'm tired of spewing it's making me hungry." 

Harry packed up the paperwork in his office, hopped in his car and drove straight home. 

50 minutes goes by and there's no reply. Louis was on the verge of wanting to send another message explaining he was really feeling ill in case Harry was really mad and the last thing he wants is to fight again after just clearing the air. Finally, Harry replies. 

From Harry: 
" I hope you have clothes on im coming up the stairs" 

Louis sits up quickly, wiping his hair to the side of his face. He looks terrible, he feels terrible and his highly embarrassed that Harry is going to see him like this. The small creak of Louis's door being pushed open is heard as Harry appears carrying a large tray. 

" Harry, what the hell are you doing here? You might catch whatever I've got! How did u get in? Even worse what are you doing home from work?" 

Harry places the tray on the bedside table, immediately feeling Louis's head. 

" Harry I'm fine, it's just a little bug." 

Harry smiles and hands Louis the large bowl that was situated on the serving tray. 

" Here, drink up. My mum use to give me this when I was sick. It is a chicken broth. I used the key under the mat silly and of course, I came to check on you, as if I wouldn't." 

Louis picked up the spoon, worried the smell alone would make him sick he swallowed it slowly and to his surprise not only did it smell lovely it tasted delicious. 

" This is actually good Haz, thank you." 

" No problem. It doesn't take long to make. " 

" You made this!?! You left work to cater for me. Oh shit Haz, I'm sorry. You shouldn't have done that." 

" Don't be sorry. You know I'd do anything for you, plus it was a slow day at work anyway. " 

For some reason, Harry's words had caused a moment of silence. Pretty sure it was Louis who was scared of the choice of words Harry had used. 

'You know I'd do anything for you' 

It sits a little differently now, feeling somewhat deeper and more meaningful than it use to. 
Even thou they had agreed to be friends only, there was still that connection, memory, and hurt still associated with their brief time together. 

" Yeah ok..um, I'm going to go, if you need anything just call." 

As luck is never on Louis's side, he lunges to the side of the bed, running to the toilet just making it in time. Harry follows not bothered by the action. Harry isn't going to lie, right now he just wants to cuddle him and tell him it's all going to be ok. He finds himself reaching out to rub Louis's back but retracts his arm immediately not wanting to cross any line or make it awkward. 

By the time Louis is finished he turns to see Harry is no longer in sight. I mean he can't blame him, the sight of someone puking isn't amusing for anyone. When he finishes cleaning his face and brushing his teeth, he hops back into bed pulling the covers up over himself. His eyelids are extremely heavy and again the overpowering feeling of tiredness falls upon him. 

His eyes are closed when he hears footsteps approaching his room. Not really sure why but he decides to keep his eyes closed pretending to be asleep. There's a ruffling sound next to him on the bedside table, realising Harry must have been placing something down. 

Louis can sense how close Harry is standing and it is confirmed the moment he feels Harry's large hand move his hair out of his face, his thumb dropping to caress his cheek. 

Louis had forgotten how soft his hands were. How warm and comforting he felt. What he didn't expect was feeling his plumpy lips pressed to his forehead. Louis nearly caved at the sudden reminder of how much contentment Harry gives him. He hears Harry sigh followed by the sound of receding footsteps. Harry just made it to the door when his heart skips a beat. 

" Harry" 

Harry is surprised as he had assumed Louis was asleep. His a little worried Louis is going to scorn him for kissing him. He doesn't turn around, he doesn't want to see Louis's reaction. 

" Thankyou " 

Harry smiles to himself. 

" Get some rest. " Harry says softly before continuing on towards the staircase. 

Louis sits up looking next to him. There beside him was a cup of tea and some dried toast. His phone dings seeing a text from Harry. 

From Harry :
" Sorry, the broth didn't work. The only other thing I could think of was dried toast, it use to settle my stomach when I was ill. Get better soon. -H x" 

Louis couldn't help but smile at his screen. The amount of spewing had made him hungry so he did attempt the toast and surprisingly enough, he ate it all and kept it in. He tucked himself back into bed and within seconds, he was out cold snoring like a baby. 

************** 

After a few days had passed Louis was feeling back to normal fully convinced he was recovered. Life went on and Louis felt great today, the best he had been in over a week until he found a letter hidden in Elly's make-up drawer. 

Elly was late this morning leaving 30 minutes later than usual. It was a cold morning and she struggled not wanting to leave the blankets. In her rush to get ready and leave, she had left quite the mess on the bathroom vanity. Louis since he was feeling so much better today went on a cleaning spree. He had opened her drawer with no intention to snoop just to pack away her lipstick and mascara when he noticed a neatly folded up piece of paper. Thinking it was weird and completely odd to have paper like that in a make-up drawer, curiosity got the better of him and he opened it to read it. 

So much anger filled Louis. For the rest of the day, he swore at everything from the t.v remote not working, to dropping his spoon in the cereal. Everything was pissing him off. He tried to clean the rest of the house but found himself slamming drawers and cupboards. The fury building up inside of him was not going anywhere. He found himself consistently watching the clock, each tick bringing himself closer to Elly's arrival home. He didn't care what plans she had tonight or whether she had to 'work' late. He took out his phone sending her a message. 

To Elly:
" I need to speak to you urgently. The sooner you get home the better!" 

From Elly:
" Is everything ok? I can leave in an hour or two. Should I be worried?" 

Louis doesn't respond not wanting to say something he might regret before she returns home. Time went slowly for Louis who was itching to address what he had found. Hearing the front door close at 4 pm he rushes downstairs. 

Elly is taking off her coat, as she proceeds to the kitchen. 

" Hey baby, what's wrong you had me worried earlier" 

Louis watches her open the fridge pouring herself an orange juice. He can't believe she had done this to him, knowing his stance on it. He pulls out the paper slamming it down onto the bench. 

" How could you !!!" 

Elly stills and he can already tell she recognises the paper. 

" Babe, I can explain." 

There's no justifiable explanation in Louis's eyes. 

" It's fraud that's what it is!!" Louis yells. 

" You went and did this behind my fucking back, knowing full well how I would feel about it and for what reason huh?? Tell me, Elly !!! what made you think taking out a $20,000 credit card using my home as equity, forging my fucking signature would be ok by any fucking means. Dam you Elly, I can't seriously believe you sometimes. !!!!" 

Elly starts to cry due to Louis's loud screaming. 

" I'm sorry, I'm sorry. " is all she can repeat in between Louis's outbursts. 

" Sorry. Wow. You are fucking sorry. Well that's something at least isn't it." 

His sarcastic remarks cause Elly to leave the room. Louis follows not wanting her to escape the issue at hand. 

" Tell me when did you do this and why at least " 

Elly enters the bedroom taking off her work dress and searching her cupboard for something casual to wear. She tries not to make eye contact. She does feel terrible and guilty but in the same respect never thought she would have ever been caught. You see, when Elly had found out about the charity auction before her trip she knew Louis wouldn't allow her to spend too much money and all the designer clothes on sale were too much of a good opportunity to pass up. Taking things into her own hands she applied online using both their details. When it was accepted, she made sure any correspondence was sent to her office where she signed Louis's signature to confirm it all. She knows she's done wrong in a biggggg way but at the same time, there doesn't seem to be any regret there, even when Louis is death starring her. 

" Louis, please be reasonable and see it from my point of view. I needed money, and you didn't want to give it to me, so I acted on instinct and got a loan. So what, I'm working more now and I can totally afford the repayments. Plus, it gave me extra spending money for New York." 

Louis can't for the life of him believe what he is hearing. Disgusted he walks up to her, his face inches from hers. 

" You have a fucking problem El, you have no idea how angry I am. You forged my fucking name for fucks sakes!!! You really need to get some help because if you ever pull this type of bullshit again so help me God, our relationship will be over. Understand!" 

Elly stands still eyes glued to Louis as she doesn't respond. 

" DO YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND!!" 

He shouts as Elly jumps at the sound. 

Leaving the room he slams the door, he can't remember a time where he has ever been this enraged. 

~~~ 2 Weeks Later ~~~ 

Louis and Elly haven't spoken a word in 14 days. It's been awkward and uncomfortable in every way. Elly has made sure to return home as late as she can knowing Louis would be in bed and always woke at the crack of dawn to be gone before he had the chance to wake. 

Being Sunday today she had no excuse to get out of bed and leave. The two who still share a bed sleep on opposite sides making sure to avoid each other at all costs. This morning Elly walks out of the bathroom after her shower while Louis watches on silently. They are supposed to be joining Lexi and Harry for dinner tonight so Louis feels he needs to somehow make a truce so as to not make the evening over at next doors any more uncomfortable. 

" What time are we due at Harry's?" 

It's the first time they have spoken and Elly turns to Louis giving a small half-hearted smile. 

"6 pm" is all she replies with and Louis decides to be the better person. He stands up walking over to grab her from behind hugging into her back. 

" I shouldn't have yelled the way I did. I'm sorry for that. " 

Elly turns around to face him, kissing him on the lips slowly. 

" No baby, I'm sorry. I knew it was wrong, I can't change what I did but I can promise not to do it ever again. " 

Louis pulls her in for a hug. 

" Just think next time. Don't ever do something like that again without discussing it with me first. And El, I was serious about what I said. I can forgive you for this but if you lie and deceive me again, that will be it for us. " 

Elly looks to the ground taking a big deep sigh. 

" I know. " 

Louis felt a little better having now resolved things with his wife but not everything had been resolved. He started spewing again and Louis now had an unsettling inkling in the back of his mind, as to what it could be. He didn't want to check though because, in all honesty, he was beyond fucking terrified. 

As the day went on, Louis found himself more tired, more irritable and more nauseated. 

" Louis babe, do you mind popping over to the shops to grab a few things the fridge is almost empty." 

" Sure" 

************ 

" Louis you need to move faster it's already 5.50 pm and you are not even dressed properly. What is wrong with you, I thought you were over your little flu." 

" I am, Just let me have a shower and I will come over. You can go now I won't be long. I'm sure they are not going to sue me if I'm late" .....Louis pauses pretending to think..." then again knowing Lexi and her being a lawyer" 

Elly laughs as she picks up her handbag. 

" Ok don't be long. " 

****** 

The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is the unknown. 

As Louis stands in front of his bathroom mirror, he splashes some water onto his face in the hope of freshening up the perspiration he has acquired from the nerves that are consuming him. He knows what he has to do now, but it's trying to find the courage to do so that is the problem. Taking a few deep breaths he reaches for the towel dabbing his face dry. 

Now he has finally talked himself into it, it's got to be now or never. He walks quickly leaving the house believing it's better to just get it over and done with. From Louis's front door to Harry's, it should only take approximately 45 seconds. He left his house 4 minutes ago and finds himself standing at Harry's door not being able to bring himself to knock. 

Standing there trying to deal with the ongoing battle inside his head, he hears Elly squeal with excitement from inside. This prompts him to knock before turning the knob and entering through. 

Halfway down the hallway, he notices all three of them sitting in the lounge room, Harry sitting in an armchair while Lexi and Elly shared the 2 seater couch. Harry was staring off into space his eyebrows somewhat burrowed as though he was lost in deep thought. 

" You are finally here. Baby come here, you need to see this. " Elly claps her hands in eagerness. 

Louis looked to Harry who still hadn't moved. The more closer he got to the girls Louis noticed the massive smile on Lexi's face. That alone was making him more anxious than he already previously was. Elly points to the little coffee table down in front of them. 

" Sorry, I did try to wait until you got here but you were taking way too long. " 

Lexi says, although her words don't seem genuine at all. When his eyes fall on the 'excitement' Louis's heart almost stops, for a few seconds he actually thought it had. 

It suddenly becomes hard to breathe. There before him sprawled out on the table lay something he never expected to see. 

      ![](https://img.wattpad.com/bdd97b259f5c18ea760f02354a77f65bbf453792/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6f7069414c7a6c514868347477513d3d2d313233303434323039332e313732343965613130643166323162663738303439303333303037322e6a7067)

Louis looked to Lexi who had the biggest smirk on her face. He couldn't bare to look at Harry yet. Although he felt a piece of him was dying inside he put on a brave face and lent forward to hug Lexi. 

" Congrats love. " 

Louis under any other circumstance would have shown more excitement but those were the only words he could seem to put together.
Louis felt Harry's hand on his shoulder and a whisper to his ear. 
' A word ' 

Elly and Lexi were already back to being in their own little element and didn't even notice the 2 men leave to the back patio. Harry headed straight to the bar fridge grabbing out 2 beers, popping the lid and handing one to Louis. The two sat in silence for a couple of minutes before Harry looked at Louis with pleading eyes. 

" What the fuck have I done. Help me, Lou, please. I've fucked up. I can't do this. I can't be with her, I can't...." 

Harry was talking so fast, it scared Louis seeing the panic and distress he was clearly under. 

" Haz. Calm down. Take a deep breath. " 

It was kind of ironic when you think about it. Here Louis was only 10 mins prior having his own anxiety attack and now here he is trying to talk Harry through his. 

" How can I calm down Lou, she's pregnant. I can't believe I made this mistake with her again. " 

Louis frowned. 

" I don't mean to pry and tell me to stay the fuck out of it if you want but How did this happen? I didn't realise you were sleeping with her,
I thought you told me you hadn't touched her since you moved out to the guest room. " 

Harry skulled the beer downing the bottle in one shot. 

" Whoah slow it down their buddy. " 

Louis raised his eyebrows waiting for his response. 

" I slept with her when she got back. I was really drunk and wasn't thinking clearly. I was so upset about us and our fight and ....I don't love her Lou...I love- " 

Louis felt a stabbing pain straight through his heart, in more ways than one. Not only had he been the cause of Harry's drinking but now coincidentally he was the reason Lexi was now pregnant. 

" Harry..." 

Louis knew where this conversation was heading so he put a stop to it before it got there. 

" I don't want a baby." Harry whimpers out. 

" Harry, you love kids." 

Harry covered his face with his hands as he lent forward slouching onto the table. It was hard to hear as his mouth was buried into the table but Louis heard it. 

" I can't do this Louis, I don't want to be a dad." 

The words hit Louis hard. Harry had always wanted kids and now he doesn't? Louis's vision became blurry as everywhere he looked everything was spinning and he felt the familiar taste of bile creeping up his throat. 

" Harry I'm sorry I have to go. Please tell Elly I'm not feeling well and I'm going home to rest. " 

Harry stood up immediately, shocked at Louis's unexpected departure. 

" Lou please don't leave. I need you right now. Please. " 

Louis couldn't even respond. His little legs have never moved so quickly as his nausea worsened. He left through the side gate. When he arrives home he runs straight to the bathroom to empty his stomach. 

Sitting on the bed, he reaches into his pant pocket and automatically cries. He sobbed uncontrollably as he grips a hand across his chest, the tears strolling down his cheeks. 

Louis thought he was scared and confused before, doesn't even come close to how he feels now. There's no way he is going to talk to Harry anymore, he can't do it. 

Harry is going to be a dad. 

Louis looks down at the positive pregnancy test in his hand......
well so was he, as it turns out. 

************

A/N 

* hides under blanket* 

I'm

 sorry !!! 

It was needed, 

I

 promise 

it's

 all for the good. 

Thoughts on chapter?

So both Lexi and Louis are pregnant....

How

 is Louis going to explain baby stylinson to his wife? How is Harry going to cope with not 1 baby on the way but 2???? 

Please remember to vote, comment and share. !! 

Thankyou to all of you who keep me inspired. 

♡♡♡

# Chapter 15 - Denial 

Change can be a scary thing, but do you know what's even scarier? allowing fear and worry to stop you from growing, moving forward and progressing in life. 

Harry and Louis are both in a state of denial. What they don't realise is that no matter how much you try to deny the truth, it can't change the facts, in the same way, that no matter how much you try to deny your feelings about a certain situation or someone in particular, it won't make it go away. It only prolongs resolution. 

Harry has had to listen to Lexi inform her parents of her pregnancy and laugh on the phone excitedly with her friends and Harry has not yet once been able to smile about any of it. He's hoping that all of this is just some bizarre dream he has landed himself into.  

Harry watches the wooden spoon circle around and around the pot, as he zoned out into his own little world. While he continued to stir, the doorbell sounded unexpectedly. Lexi who was curled up on the lounge rose to her feet. ' I will get it ' she yells walking down the hallway. 

" Elly, what a nice surprise. What can I do for you?" 

Harry turns the stove off placing the pot onto the sink trying to listen in. 

" I'm really sorry if I'm intruding, I've just finished work and when I pulled into the driveway I had an idea. I haven't checked with Louis yet but I'm sure he will be fine with it. I was wondering since we haven't done it in a while, would you guys like to go to the cinema tomorrow, the one not too far from here, the one located in the mall, if you guys are not busy of course" 

Lexi like usual doesn't even check with Harry first instead agreeing instantly. 

" That's such a great idea, we haven't been there together for such a long time" 

Harry sighs, the last thing he feels like doing is spending any more unnecessary time with her than he has to. A few minutes later Lexi enters the kitchen. 

" Did you hear that? 11 am tomorrow movie date with the Tomlinsons, I'm so excited we haven't been there in so lo-" 

" It would have been nice if you actually asked me first. What if I was busy or had stuff to do huh ?" 

Lexi frowns as she walks closer to him. 

" I'm sorry. Are you busy?" 

She aligns herself chest to chest with her husband. She wants to hug him, Harry hasn't touched her in any way since the night they slept together so many weeks ago. She is craving some sort of affection from her husband, anything even if it is something as small as a hug. 

Lexi makes a bold decision to try and hug him by wrapping her arms around his torso while pressing her cheek to his chest. For a moment Harry is confused within himself. He can feel Lexi's plea for contact and he doesn't know what to do. He will always love her just not in the way she desires. He places a hand on her lower back in a half-assed attempt to show her a tiny bit of comfort. He just doesn't want her to get the wrong idea. He has been thinking about having a talk with her, to discuss their marriage and baby, but he just can't seem to find the right words yet or the courage to do so. He feels utterly trapped. 

Harry grabs her by the arms pulling her backwards softly. Lexi places a hand on her stomach which causes Harry to sidestep around her grabbing the pasta sauce and proceeding to cook dinner in silence. Lexi finds herself back on the lounge starring blankly at the T.V. There are a million different thoughts consuming her, the biggest and most hurtful one is her trying to understand and make sense of why her husband has become so distant so quickly and why he isn't showing no support or enthusiasm towards her pregnancy. 

Holding back her tears, she vacates to her bedroom opting to pass on dinner. While laying on her bed she uses the palm of her hand to caress her belly. Harry had agreed to try for another baby which was making her even more confused. What had changed and why? An hour later she eventually dozed off after succumbing to a good cry, while Harry spent half the night sitting at the kitchen table with a bottle of scotch in hand. 

************ 

" Louis C'mon wake up" 

" I am awake" 

" No you are not, your eyes are still closed" 

" That may be true, but my mind is well and truly awake I will get up soon just give me another 5" 

" What is happening with you lately? You slept for like 12 hours straight last night." 

Sick of hearing her bitching Louis lunges the blanket off of himself and beelines for the shower. 

"That's better, now don't take all day"
Elly shouts as Louis closes the door. 

After relieving himself from his morning wee, he pulled his t-shirt over his head dropping it to the floor. He turns on the taps, adjusting the heat just the way he likes it. Turning around to check whether there was a towel ready for when he got out, he notices himself in the mirror and something catches his eye. 

'No No No' 

He thinks to himself. He turns sideways looking at his stomach. There is the smallest of smallest of smallest bit of roundness to his lower belly. No one else would even notice or think anything of it but Louis does. He sees it all too clear. He has spent the last several weeks in complete denial. In some kind of wishful thinking, Louis has the idea in his head that if he doesn't think about or address his 'problem' it will miraculously disappear. 

He tried his absolute best to not think about the little human that is slowly forming and growing inside of him and for the first time, as he now looks at his tiny 'bump' he wants to feel his stomach.....his baby. Louis has not yet touched his belly at all, too frightened that the action will make it all seem to real. He nibbles at his lower lip as he watches his hand that is hovering only inches from his tummy. He can't do it. He closes his eyes letting out a deep sigh before stepping into the shower. 

Louis has always done his best thinking while in the shower. There's just something about the few minutes where the heat, the steam and streaming water hitting and rolling down your body that allows you to semi escape your worries if only for a little bit that Louis loves. 

Elly is downstairs doing god knows what and Louis couldn't be any more grateful because his favourite pair of jeans that he religiously wears is starting to feel a little snug. He feels bloated and a little nauseated still and if Elly walked in the room right now, he could totally pass it off as having eaten too many tacos for dinner last night. 

He has to remember to buy a new pair because now he has searched and searched the cupboard and nothing seemed appropriate to wear out that he feels comfortable in unless he throws on his grey sweatpants but he can't see himself doing that as Elly would have a stroke. He decides to just wear the tighter jeans leaving the button undone, making sure to wear a shirt and jacket that is a little larger. 

Louis has made a decision. 

Sometimes in life, you have to make choices that are best for you and not everyone else. Looking after yourself mentally and physically is something you should prioritize even if it's something you are not used to doing. 

As Louis is still trying to come to terms with his pregnancy, his feelings for Harry and his marriage to Elly he has decided that he is going to keep his little ' surprise' a secret for a little while longer, at least until he has had some more time to think and work out exactly how it is that he is going to break the news to everyone. Creating some distance between him and Harry sounds like it's the only best option he has. 

*********** 

Harry cannot believe he is sitting in a cinema watching some romantic comedy called ' friends with benefits' its kind of funny when you think about it. Harry noticed upon arriving that Louis was rather quiet. Harry had assumed the girls would sit together leaving him to sit beside Louis but it wasn't the case. Louis made sure to enter the row of seats before Elly and Lexi leaving Harry on the opposite end to Lou. 

Louis seemed very engaged in the movie as Harry couldn't help but steal as many glances as he could. At one point he witness Louis smirking to himself, Harry couldn't tell you why though as he was in no way paying any attention to the movie. If only Harry knew that Louis's smile was because of him. Louis was making sure not to look Harry's way, the idea of wanting space between them still fresh in his mind, had found himself smirking reminiscing about the last time they were here. More directly, the way Harry had gotten so jealous over Luke. 

Louis stretched his arm out behind the back of Elly's seat, both men not realising they were mirroring each other as Harry's arm fell behind Lexi. Louis instantly felt Harry's wrist pressed against his own but tried to pretend he didn't. He closed his eyes taking in the feeling of calmness that it gave him. It was longer than Harry had expected before Louis moved his hand away. Harry couldn't deny loving the feeling that had just flowed throughout him caused only by the smallest of Louis's touch. 

Louis stood up announcing he was going to go and use the bathroom quickly. Watching him vacate through the exit door Harry too excused himself following in pursuit. Opening up the toilet door he spots Louis who has his head hung low with each hand holding onto the sides of the basin. He knows there's something wrong and he can't stop the natural instinct he has to approach him and ask him about it. 

Walking closer to him, Louis who is aware of his presence doesn't move an inch. 

" Lou, what's wrong?" 

Harry places his hand gently to Louis's chin, turning his head slightly to face him. As Louis hasn't responded Harry chooses to speak once again. 

" Whatever is bothering you, Lou, please let me help you" 

Louis stares into a pool of green eyes and he can only blame the uncontrollable hormones that he has picked up this last week as all thoughts about distancing himself go flying right out the window. Louis's eyes focus on Harry's lips and Harry is totally sure that what he does next is 100% going to have some sort of repercussions. 

He places both of his hands to Louis's hips, smoothly pulling him in closer. Ever so slowly and gently, as to give Louis the opportunity to pull away if he wishes, he delicately connects their lips. When he feels Louis kiss him back, it all changes really quickly. Harry becomes very hungry, not having felt those lips he craves for such a long time. It all happens so fast as Harry pulls Louis into the cubicle. 

⚠️slight smut warning⚠️ 

While Louis attacks Harry's neck with kisses, in a moment of lust Louis seems to forget that their wives had returned home and sucks a bruise into Harry's collarbone. Harry pulls Louis's pants and boxers down and Louis is glad that Harry turns him around, his belly now out of sight as Louis is pushed up against the wall. Within seconds Harry drops to his knees as Louis feels his cheeks being pulled apart and gasps when he feels the coldness of Harry's tongue licking a stripe up his entrance. Harry kisses, licks and sucks frantically using his saliva as a lubricant making Louis whimper in pleasure. 

Harry returns to his feet inserting his fingers to open him up quickly as he leans himself up against Louis's back whispering into his ear. 

" I've missed you so much, baby" 

Using the palms of his hands that are pressed to the wall Louis pushes back slightly deepening Harry's fingers into him. Harry uses his other hand to undo his pants realizing Louis is ready. Wasting no time Harry penetrates into him steadily. The sex is slow and tender. It's very intimate, even if the surrounding setting wasn't that great. Louis comes first seconds before Harry who had gripped Louis's hips tightly bottoming out. 

⚠️End of smut ⚠️ 

It becomes quite apparent that whenever Harry is around Louis he seems to switch off his brain as everything becomes fuzzy. You would have thought he would have learnt a valuable lesson regarding condoms, not that it matters now anyway with him being none the wiser of the current situation but Louis frazzles him and Harry can't seem to get enough. 

Harry leans forward placing a small kiss to Louis's back before pulling up his pants. Louis takes 0.02 seconds to enter into a state of panic. He can't believe he just let that happen. He already hates himself for giving in so easily but somehow it's not nowhere as easy as he thought it was going to be. 

Louis Tomlinson, the master of changing his mind, emotions and feelings over and over and over again. Turning to Harry who notices his regret immediately, Louis fumbles for words before finally settling on the following. 

" Shit Harry, I'm so very sorry, this....this should not have happened, this was a mistake. I'm so sorry, I'm really really sorry." 

Harry stops him. 

" No don't you dare say that to me, please. It was not a mistake Lou. I know you feel it too, whenever we touch, tell me you don't feel the love that radiates off of us Louis, I know you see it too." 

Louis who cant deny what Harry is saying because it's true can feel the tears filling his eyes. 

" What I see Harry....is your pregnant wife sitting out there. This should not have happened. It was wrong, it's my fault, I don't know what come over me." 

Harry stands there shaking his head no. 

"It's no-ones fault as such Lou, ok." 

Harry grabs Louis's hand squeezing it tightly not wanting to let him leave. 

" Harry....can we just go, please....This never happened ok" 

Not wanting to upset him any further, Harry releases his grip and pushes open the door allowing him to exit the cubicle. 

" Lou, I will be out in a minute, just tell the girls I went outside for a smoke." 

Louis nods understanding the excuse for their longer than expected absence. When Louis has left, Harry washes his hands and face giving himself a look over in the mirror. He traces his hand along his collarbone noticing the purple bruise and he should be freaking out but his not. He adjusts his shirt covering the mark, making a note to put his jacket back on when he returns to his seat. 

Harry looks in the mirror one last time and there's not one ounce of panic whatsoever. There's no worry spread across his face at all, but something is there....a huge fucking smile, that's what. 

On the walk back Louis is wiping his eyes angry at himself for giving in to temptation. 

If only Louis understood that temptation..... usually comes in through a door that has been deliberately left open. 

************* 

Leaving the cinema and re-entering the mall, Elly squeals and claps her hands. 

" Lex hunny look" 

Harry rolls his eyes as he realises where Elly is pointing. 

" C'mon let's go" Lexi smiles. Elly pulls Louis along as they all step foot into Babies'R'us 

Louis is struggling. Walking around he tries to not focus too hard on all the items of baby wear and furniture. He feels his heart already starting to increase and his only been in the shop barely 2 minutes. 

" Aww Louis look at this" Elly coos holding up an infant romper. 

Louis smiles gently. 

" Lexi I can not wait to babysit, but I'm so glad I can hand the little one back. " Elly laughs. 

Louis swallows. Hearing her say that reminds him just how much Elly has never wanted children. She loves kids but from the very start of their relationship had always let Louis know she had no intention of becoming a parent. Of course, this had hurt Louis initially. He had always wanted children but he loved Elly immensely and giving up the chance to be a parent seemed small in comparison to marrying the love of his life. 

Harry is slowly following Lexi around keeping a few feet in tow. He looks across and sees that Louis has slightly ventured off onto his own. He doesn't know if approaching him is the smartest idea after what had just previously gone down in the cinema but he does it anyway. 

Louis is standing beside a baby's crib his hand carefully feeling the material of a small cloud that is a part of a cot mobile. It's beautiful he thinks and for a split second pictures it for his own baby.  He hears footsteps behind him quickly letting it go and turning to face them. 

Harry had seen the way Louis was admiring the mobile and thought it was a little strange but doesn't question it further. 

" Found anything you like? " Louis questions. 

" Louis...you know how I feel, I can't, I don't......" 

Louis leans closer to Harry so he can lower his voice. 

" You are going to be a dad Harry. You need to let that sink in. However, you feel about Lexi needs to be put aside. There's a small baby who is going to need you Haz. I know you are struggling to come to terms with it all but you have to start supporting Lexi and be there for her. I know you are better than this." 

Louis doesn't know why or where that little speech just came from. All he knows is that looking over across the room, Lexi is super happy and he knows that Harry will be a wonderful dad and husband when their baby is born and Louis..... does not want to be the reason a family could be torn apart. 

Louis has done a lot of thinking these last few weeks. He doesn't know what to do. His wife doesn't want kids, and the person he is in love with is his best friend who is already married and expecting a baby of their own. He feels lost and scared. 

He has thought of everything possible from leaving Elly, packing his bags and leaving the country to start afresh to just jumping off a bridge. He can't seem to come to any reasonable solution. 

On the ride home, Lexi shows Elly an ultrasound that she had yesterday. He hears Lexi claim she's now 8 weeks along. Louis unknowing he is doing so smiles as he realises he must be 10 weeks, knowing he slept with Harry 2 weeks earlier than she had. It makes Louis realise that he can't put this off any longer He needs to make an obstetric appointment and start getting some maternity care. 
    
***********
The following evening, Louis is sat in his office chair finishing off a new chapter for his new upcoming novel. He is pretty annoyed that Elly hadn't come home for dinner again. It's pushing 10.40 pm when he hears the sound of Elly's heels echoing down the hallway. 

" I'm in here love" he calls signalling her to his office. 

The door opens and Elly looks angry. Elly never looks angry. Louis who is still seated is concerned at his wife's demeanour. 

Without speaking she slams something down onto the table in front of him. Louis freezes when he sees what it is. 

" Care to explain your fucking yourself " the tone of her voice shocked Louis completely. 

He reaches forward picking up the square object. 

How the fuck did she get this? 

***********

A/N 

What do 

you

 think Elly has? 

Were you suprised at the Larry toilet scene? How do you think it affects their relationship? 

And lastly, what are your thoughts about what Louis should do regarding his situation? 

Thanks again for all your support. 

Vote share and comment. 

♡♡♡

# Chapter 16 - Moving

It's always the things that you least expect that tend to hit you the hardest. You should never be afraid to start over, it's a chance to rebuild your life just the way you had always intended. Sometimes trying to fix something that is already broken will simply not be enough, because every now and then, starting over fresh allows for something better to enter your life. 

Louis is not in the mood. He hasn't felt this way in such a long time. His life is crumbling down around him and he feels there's nothing he can do to stop it. Venturing out to the grocery store has worn him out. He didn't want to go there, to begin with, and now his just plain tired. Tired from no sleep, tired from crying, tired from fucking life. 

Harry who is walking out his front door on his way for his daily jog notices Louis at the trunk of his car unloading the grocery bags. Harry's plan was to throw a little banter and joke around like they use to. An effort to bring back some familiarity from their years of friendship. 

Now, normally Louis would have loved this. What Harry says is something they would generally make fun about with each other, being as close as they were neither would take offence...it's just banter after all. Unfortunately for Harry, he had no idea how close his words were about to hit home. 

" Fancy a run with me?" 

Louis jumped a little startled at the voice that had approached him from behind. There was no amusement on his face and Harry could see he seemed upset. Trying to lighten his mood, just like he always would, he makes a little joke. 

" I can see that little tubby pouch you got happening Loubear, I don't think you can afford to say no...no more beers for you I think." Harry laughs reaching out to grab and tickle Louis's stomach. 

It's a joke of course and Louis normally would just throw something back 10x worse in regards to Harry's appearance. It's something they have always done, so Harry is absolutely alarmed when Louis intercepts his hands extremely tightly. 

" Fuck off Harry. Don't touch me!!" 

Harry puts his hands up surrendering. Louis was just so scared of having Harry touch his belly and somehow putting it all together he overreacted. 

" Far out Lou. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. 

" No shit! How bout you go touch your fucking wife for a change!" 

Louis slams the trunk closed picking up his bags. 

" Louis ..." 

" Leave me the hell alone Harry." 

Harry jogs away now pissed off himself, not understanding where the fuck that all just came from. Louis drops the bags to the kitchen counter before breaking down. 

He didn't mean to snap. He's so overwhelmed with everything that is happening and his hormones are getting the better of him. His argument with Elly is still not sitting well with him. It's so quiet. Elly has only been gone for 1 night and the house already seems so empty. 

~~~FLASHBACK ~~~ 

" Care to explain your fucking yourself?" 
the tone of her voice shocking Louis completely. 

He reaches forward picking up the square object. 

How the fuck did she get this? 

Elly leans forward snatching the photo and slamming it to Louis's chest. 

" I fucking knew it. I knew you and Harry were close but I didn't think it was that close. My god, I should have known." 

" Elly calm down, it's not what it looks like. It was a joke that's all" 

Elly starts pacing the room. 

" OH it all makes sense now, when we got back and I asked what you guys had been up to, and you both became uncomfortable. For fucks sake. How was I so blind." 

" Elly" 

" Don't Elly me, Louis. Are you going to sit there and try to deny that you are not kissing him here.....wow Louis. Harry of all people. So... what are you gay now all of a sudden." 

" What! No." He says panicking in a last attempt to try and cover his infidelity. 

" Oh before I forget here. " 

Elly reaches into her pocket pulling out a rolled-up stack of money. 

" Here's your money darling. Most romantic couple! Congratulations!!" 

The money is forcefully thrown to the ground. 

" The man called this morning while you were still asleep. I answered the call. When he announced you had won, he went on to say it was great to see a same-sex couple win for a change. Of course, this made me curious. I opened up your phone. I've seen your messages. I've seen some photos. I literally can't believe this." 

Louis can't move. Elly knows. Elly knows about him and Harry and it's safe to say Louis can now barely breathe. 

" Please Babe I can explain. " 

Elly is standing tall both her hands firmly on her hips. 

" Go ahead, darling. Give it your best shot. I'm so embarrassed, how the hell am I ever going to be able to show my face there again? Not only did I humiliate myself going there to collect your prize but I've had to try to work today knowing about all this fucking bullshit." 

Louis jumps to his feet. 

" El, you need to listen to me.... Harry and I we are not - " 

Louis pauses for a split second when a light bulb goes off. 

" El what did you just say? 

Louis frowns as Elly widens her eyes as she realises her mistake. 

" Is that why you are never home early? You go there don't you? Who do you go with? You go with him don't you, It's Tom isn't it!!!" Louis shouts. 

Elly who is playing with her fingernails just stares at the ground not having the courage nor the answers to reply yet. Louis storms past her to the kitchen swiping his keys off the counter and exiting the front door. He hears Elly calling his name but he doesn't acknowledge it. 

Louis is glad the cabin pub is open late tonight. Walking in he heads straight for the picture boards. There are tonnes of photos spread along the wall from over the months. Skimming through them his eyes finally fall upon what he was searching for. 

Elly and Tom. 

Louis knows he shouldn't feel as shocked as he is. He had always had a suspicion but somehow the blow didn't hurt any less. As if one picture wasn't enough, he counted 6 more, the knife digging a little bit deeper into his chest. 

The drive home was slow as Louis took the opportunity to process tonight's revelations. By the time he arrives back he finds Elly in the bedroom, her suitcase laid open on the bed. 

" Going somewhere cheater?" 

Elly scoffs as she turns around back to her clothes cupboard grabbing another pair of jeans and tossing it into the case. 

" Cheater. Ok. I wouldn't go throwing that word around too lightly if I was you hunny. Takes one to know one right?" 

Louis stands there hopelessly watching as Elly finishes her packing. He can't even argue with that, because what she's saying is true. He is a cheater just as much as her. 

" How long?" Louis asks. 

" Does it really matter ?" 

" Not really" 

Elly pushes down into her suitcase zipping it shut. 

" I'm going to my mum's tonight for a couple of weeks. I think we both need some time to think." 

" I don't need time El," 

" Well, I do.." 

" No I mean, I don't need time to think. I want you out of here." 

" Are you fucking serious?" She yells. 

" We both cheat and yet I have to leave???" 

Louis is hating seeing her so upset but his anger and hurt is overpowering his decision making. 

Elly grabs her bag and heads out the door. Louis is worried because she's leaving so late at night knowing her mom lives an hour away. 

~~~END OF FLASHBACK ~~~ 

Louis blames Harry. 
It's all Harry's fault. 
It's his fault he cheated. 
It's his fault he kissed a man. 
It's his fault he looks gorgeous.
It's his fault for having adorable dimples and perfect long curly hair. 
It's all Harrys God dam fault!!! 

Right now even thinking about Harry is pissing him off. Because of Harry, his life is forever changed. 
His wife is gone. 
His career is now probably gone. 
Having company is gone. 

Laying down trying to calm himself he tries hard to clear his mind but he can't because he just realised that without Elly he now has to pay off the 20,000 dollar loan and look after the house all by himself and it's daunting. Without any new book ready for publishing it's frightening to think of how much he did rely on some of Elly's money. 

How was he going to do this all? Pay off the loan, write his books, look after the house and raise a baby? 

Louis cries. 

15 minutes and he was just about asleep when he heard his phone ring. Looking at the caller ID he noticed it was Elly. 

Elly had called to inform Louis she had stayed in a hotel last night and she was going to her mums this afternoon but wanted to come back and get more of her stuff to which he agreed would be fine. 

Not staying too long Elly hurried around the house collecting anything that she wanted. Louis didn't care what she took, his own guilt eating away at him. Walking to the door, the two still not having said a single word Elly gives Louis one last stare 

" Is this really it Louis?" 

Louis can feel himself being ripped apart. He knows he could forgive her and try to make it work if she could forgive him but then he remembers his ever growing bump. 

" Look after yourself El" 

************ 

The following week Louis sets off to the clinic. Having booked his scan and appointment last week he can't believe how quickly time has flown by. His anxious as he walks in, the waiting room filled with pregnant women. Male pregnancies are normal and common in this day and age but Louis had never known anyone close to him who had become pregnant. 

After signing in with the receptionist he takes a seat rubbing his hands up and down his pants. His palms are sweating badly at the thought of walking into this appointment as he knows it's going to make it all seem so real. Hearing a door close he lifts his head to see a pregnant man coming out of the restroom. 

Coincidentally he sits down beside him a large smile planted across his pale face. His hair is bleached blonde and has the bluest eyes he has ever seen. The man smiles at him as he rubbed his large ready to burst stomach. 

" Hi there. You look nervous buddy. Is this your first pregnancy? " 

Louis who normally feels uncomfortable talking to people he doesn't know, for some reason feels relaxed enough to engage into conversation. 

" Yeah, it is. My first appointment too." 

" Oh, I see. There's nothing to worry about I promise the doctor is great, trust me. " 

Louis laughs. 

" I dunno about that, I mean his name is Doctor Payne" 

The man giggles as the doctor's door opens. The doctor looks at the man beside him and winks. The man stands looking back at Louis. 

"He is my husband." 

" Ahhh oops. " 

"My name is Niall by the way, it was really nice to meet you....." 

" Louis" 

" Louis. Well, hopefully, I will see you again sometime. Good luck today, you will be fine" 

Louis thanks him and is relieved he wasn't the only man in here today. Although now as his processing in the queue, there's a part of him that wants Harry here. Deep down Louis doesn't want to do this alone. He doesn't want to do ANY of this alone but he knows he has to. Harry has another baby and wife to look after so now is the time to stop these insecurities and pull on his big boy panties. 

Niall was right. The doctor was nice and attentive. He made Louis feel safe and valued and most importantly he showed Louis his tiny baby. The appointment went well, all the baby measurements were correct and all looked OK. Louis isn't going to lie, the moment the doctor applied the gel to his belly he felt like passing out from the anxiety he was trying to conceal. 

The entire walk back through the lobby Louis couldn't take his eyes off of his sonogram. 10 little fingers and 10 little toes a beautiful mixture of himself and Harry. 

For the first time in weeks, Louis smiles. He finds himself taking a detour on the way home. He remembers seeing a little baby shop not too far away. He knows what his after and it only takes a few moments to find it. Walking back into the car he can't wait. He unwraps the baby keepsake book and places the sonogram into the little sleeve. 

*********** 

A week later and Louis has non stopped stressed about his current living predicament. He has spoken to Elly on the phone and they have decided on what to do. 

************
Back in the Styles household Harry is worried about Louis. After their little tiff the other week Louis isn't answering his calls, texts or opening his front door. 

Sitting on his lounge room couch Harry hears a car pull up out front. As his blinds are open he sees a younger lady dressed in business attire walk up to Louis's door. He hates the fact that his spying but since Louis has shut him out he feels there's no other way. 10 minutes later and now he can see not only the lady again but Louis also who are standing together near his letterbox. 

Another man appears from inside her work vehicle and Harry halts to a still. 

' WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK !!!' 

He has to grab onto his couch in order to restrain himself from storming out there. What in gods name is going on? Why is he doing this? Why hasn't Louis spoken to him about it? Harry's heart is beating a million miles a second as he watches the man hammer a ' FOR SALE' sign into his lawn. 

Harry lingers around the window waiting until the moment the lady's car leaves. He pushes open his door running across his driveway catching Louis at his door. Louis tries to deviate his eyes to anyway besides Harry but fails. Harry is heartbroken. He doesn't know what his done wrong or why Louis is shutting him out. He just wants him back. He wants his best friend back, he wants.....he just wants Louis back. 

" Your leaving?" 

Harry doesn't care if his question is pretty straight explanatory since the sign meters away from him already provides his answer. 

" I don't know what I've done to you Lou, I've upset you somehow and I'm truly sorry for whatever it is. But this ? " 

Harry points to the for sale sign. 

" What is happening? You are not answering me, you are avoiding me like the plague. I have spent so many hours trying to work it out and I come up with nothing. If it's about the little fight we had then, I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry Lou. Just stop pushing me away, please. " 

There's a loud crack of thunder and rain starts to pelt down around them. Louis can't help it. He hugs Harry tightly making sure to savour the moment because he knows he's not going to get the chance to feel this again. He pulls back looking Harry in his eyes and Louis can feel his heartbeat thumping under his shirt. 

" Promise me you will support Lexi, she needs you....A baby is a blessing, You are going to be a perfect dad Harry." 

Louis turns quickly entering his door and shutting it closed, leaving Harry standing clutching his chest, the pain shooting throughout him. 

***********
Every morning when leaving for work Harry looked at the sign exhaling a sigh of relief every time he noticed the sign hadn't changed. 

3 weeks is all it took before Harry watched the sold banner being placed on the sign. 

" Lexi have you spoken to Elly at all?" Harry questions. 

" No, she's not answering me either. I have a bad feeling about this Harry, I haven't seen her or her car for weeks." 

Harry sits down beside Lexi on the couch lifting her feet over his lap. Harry listened when Louis begged for him to support his wife, so he has attempted to at least. 

" I'm sure they will be fine. Louis is a big boy Harry I'm sure he can take care of himself." 

" How can you say that Lex, they are literally moving out and they have completely shut us both out with no fucking explanation" 

Harry rises to his feet leaving out the back sliding door, out onto the patio for a smoke. 

When night time falls Harry again finds that sleeping is nothing but a troublesome task. He hardly catches a couple of hours of shut eye each night and trying to keep himself awake and alert at work is killing him. 

Today was Lexi's doctor's appointment. Harry accompanied her and did all that was expected of him. He has started to feel like a Stepford wife. Quietly tiptoeing around the house, abiding by whatever his partner wanted. He didn't want to disappoint Louis even if he was entirely miserable doing so. 

Seeing his baby on the monitor today made Harry cry. He lent down placing a kiss to Lexi's forehead and returned his attention back to the screen. Louis was right, all he had to do was try and make an effort and things might turn out for the better. Watching his baby float around warmed something in his heart and now Harry had regained some hope and excitement to meet his little one. 

************ 

Louis had the house all packed and ready for the movers who had just honked their horn outside. Opening up the front door he greets the young lads who proceed to take directions from Louis regarding the boxes. 

When the boys head upstairs Louis stays put looking over his checklist of things to do on the clipboard he is holding. He stops, letting the pen lid that he was chewing on drop to the floor. He can feel someone behind him. He knows the scent all too well. 

" Were you even going to say goodbye?" 

Louis doesn't want to turn around because he knows he will surely break down if he does. 

" I already said goodbye last time." 

" That wasn't a goodbye Lou." 

Louis's eyes have pooled with tears so badly that every time he blinks his cheeks become wet. 

" Where is Elly ?" 

Shit. 

" She's gone, Harry." 

Harry surprised at his words grabs his arm spinning him around noticing his tear-stained face. 

" Shit what happened?" 

" She found out about us Haz, she's gone. I couldn't afford to keep this house on my own, especially with a ba- " 

Louis stops himself just in time before making a huge slip of the tongue. 

" Where are you moving to?" Harry says frowning and biting his lip. 

" I don't have anywhere to move to as such, so I'm going to stay with Luke for a little while. " 

Harry feels his whole body tense at hearing the name. 

" Oh before I forget." 

Louis searches the room knowing he had it in there somewhere. 

" I got this for you and Lexi. I was going to leave it at your door but since you are already here. " 

Harry extends his arm to hold the present bag. 

" Go on. You can look inside. " 

Harry smiles looking into the bag. He pulls out the box opening its lid. There inside is a brand name silver plated baby brush and rattle combo. Harry purses his lips together as he looks to Louis in awe. 

" You didn't need to do that Lou, you should have not spent your money like that" 

Louis smirks. 

" Don't worry I didn't" 

Harry, confused as he is, raises an eyebrow. 

" You brought it actually," Louis says trying not to laugh. 

" Huh?" 

" Jesus H you have the memory of a bloody goldfish I swear. The 200 dollars I scammed off of you over "me" cooking you breakfast. " 

Harry burst out laughing when he finally remembers. Louis is smiling so hard that Harry forgets for a second all about why he is standing there in his kitchen. Louis too becomes quiet all of a sudden, both men now not knowing what to do. Harry lunges forward hugging Louis. 

" I will see you soon Harry I promise." 

Harry pulls back and smiles. 

" Oh I know you will" 

Louis finds the comment a little weird and didn't understand what he meant by it but he didn't question it any further. Upon another final hug, Harry exits the house and returns home. 

Harry isn't sure whether what he has done is either the smartest thing you can think of or the most stupidest mistake ever. He feels confident that the decision he had made weeks ago will all turn out for the best....if only he can hide it from Lexi. 

Harry walks into his office, punching in the numbers on the safe opening the lid to reveal a bunch of papers. Picking it up he glances over the deed once again. 

Harry has secretly brought Louis's house anonymously and without Lexi or Louis having no clue about it. You see, Harry had realised that when the house went on the market he knew he had to enquire about it. He jumped on the phone and the realtor had explained the owner was having money issues and needed to sell. Harry was not going to let Louis lose his house, not in this lifetime. 

Now hearing that he is staying with Luke, Harry is going to move his plan faster along. He had wanted to redecorate a little, to upgrade a few appliances and fix a few things back up before informing Louis and letting him have the house back. 

Now he is determined to get it done quickly because the longer he takes the longer he is away from him. 

**************

A/N 

Thoughts ? 

How do you think Louis will react when he eventually finds out this bit of information?

Who's

 happy about Elly being gone? 

is it a case of 1 down another 1 to go ? Hahaha.... 

Nope
 
sorry guys....

Lexi is hanging around. 

Please remember to vote comment and share. 

♡♡♡

# Chapter 17 -Revealed

A/N

Just a heads up. This chapter is way longer than usual. I normally do 3000 word chapters but this one is 5400 

that's

 almost 2 chapters in one. I just 

couldn't

 

separate

 it into 2 and hopefully you understand why after reading. Grab a cup of tea, and settle in, shits about to get real. Enjoy !!!! Xxx

**********

" Lexi shut the fuck up, I can't believe you just did that" Louis snaps. 

Lexi is pushing and pushing for more info and Louis can feel his face getting hotter by the second due to his rising anger. He wants to run and fucking hide because if he has to sit here with her any longer his going to end up with a prison sentence. 

~~~ SEVERAL HOURS EARLIER ~~~ 

Everything in life moves by so quickly. They say that time flies by while you are having fun. It's not completely true. Louis and Harry have been lonely, mad and sad and yet time...has still been on the run. 

It's been 2 months since Louis sold his house. Living with Luke was like some much needed fresh air for him. He is now 5 months along and Harry still has no idea about his second child. Louis knows he has to tell him soon and that no matter how much it scares the shit out of him he can't put it off any longer. 

Luke has been good for Louis, especially with keeping him occupied and healthy. It could also be the very reason that Louis did not keep his word and visit Harry. In fact, every call and text from Harry has gone unanswered. 

Louis just needed some space to think, to heal from his failed marriage and to let the whole idea of parenthood well and truly settle in. As much as Elly did him wrong he still misses her. Years of marriage and seeing her day in and day out is not something you just ' get over' in a flash. He knows it will take time. The anger he felt for her is slowly diminishing and he has come to terms with the whole "everything happens for a reason" thing.  

Louis has been taking his pre-natal vitamins, keeping hydrated and has even started going for a little 30-minute stroll every night to try and keep himself in shape. Giving up the alcohol has been tough but now that he had not long ago tasted tobacco again, staying away from it has been torture. 

The amount of stress he has been under has had him wanting to take a puff every 10 minutes. Luke who is a smoker himself has tried his best to hide his smoking by leaving the house and spraying himself with deodorant so Louis can't smell it and be tempted.
He hasn't given in yet, as each time he feels remotely too tempted he just imagines his baby coughing on the smoke. It's enough to take his urge away and so far it's working. 

As Luke works a lot and is away for most of the day, Louis finds himself alone a lot of the time. Every night as he hops into his bed he finds himself missing having a person to cuddle with. He misses the warmth, the talks and the laughs. Tonight as he rubs the sheet beside him, he realises he hates the spot next to him being empty and when he closes his eyes he sees Harry.  He misses Harry not Elly. 

When morning arrives Louis finds himself doing what he does every other day. He writes. The only good thing to come out of all this ordeal has been having the time and ideas to get stuck into his new book. It keeps his mind busy and that's what he needs because when he sits back and relaxes his thoughts always turn to Harry. Wonder what his doing? Wonder if he misses me?  But like always he remembers Lexi and snaps himself out of it. 

His belly is very rounded now. Louis wears oversized jumpers and jackets to hide his bump whenever he leaves the house, even when the temperature outside isn't fitting for them. He looks at his growing stomach every day in the mirror and once a week he takes a photo adding it to his keepsakes book. 

He is starting to adjust to the idea of life inside of him. When his belly had suddenly grown in size in what seemed like overnight, he often caught himself smiling when taking off his shirt when retiring to bed but he still hasn't been able to bring himself to touch his bump yet. He doesn't know why and it makes him feel guilty. 

Louis is still having bouts of morning Sickness even at 5 months. His doctor had prescribed him some nausea pills but they never helped. So he stopped taking them choosing to just deal with it instead. 

Croissants....yep that's what Louis feels like on this fine sunny morning. For the last 2 months, Louis has had the biggest cravings, having eaten Croissants for breakfast lunch and dinner almost daily. Luke has been making him vegetables with sides of protein mainly chicken and some fish here and there but Louis can't resist them. So after Luke has left for work or gone to bed Louis sneaks off for his little fix at a little French Cafe not too far from the apartment. 

He gets a little nervous leaving the house. A month ago while in the Cafe Louis who was waiting in line heard the cry of a newborn that pierced his ear. Turning around to locate the noise he found the young Irish lad he met at the clinic seated in a small corner booth. 

Niall had given birth to a little girl he named Matilda. Louis approached them and congratulated him and the two men sat together, exchanging numbers and catching up over a nice cup of tea. Louis felt safe with Niall who was very easy to talk to. He seemed to make Louis laugh a lot which he really appreciated because laughter wasn't a normal everyday occurrence for him anymore and it felt refreshing. 

At first, Louis declined Niall's offer to hold Matilda. Seeing the delicate little baby in her pram made Louis nervous. To think that in a few months time he will also have this tiny person who will rely on him, to care for them. It was a scary thought but Louis couldn't stop smiling at her. 

" Niall honestly she is so adorable, you are such a natural, look at you. " 

Matilda had started to cry and Niall was quick to pick her up out of her pram placing her up and over his shoulder gently caressing her fragile back. 

" You will be too just you wait and see.  Also, this is baby number 2 for me so I've already had practice. Have you thought of any names yet? " 

Louis frowns as he thinks. He hasn't even thought about names not once. He hasn't touched his belly, he hasn't brought his baby anything. No clothes, no accessories, no furniture no nothing. 

Luke has told Louis several times that staying with him after the baby is born is perfectly fine and he doesn't need to rush for a place until he is well and truly on his feet and ready to do so. Luke has pretty much been a lifesaver and Louis has no idea on how to thank him properly. 

" I really need to pee. Louis, do you mind just for a few minutes?" 

Niall extends the baby out to Louis who takes her into his arms gracefully. Louis is terrified he's going to hurt her. Niall stands draping the blanket over Matilda. 

" Stop looking like that, you are going to be fine. I will only be gone a minute or two." 

Soon as Niall leaves of course Matilda starts to stir a little. She's not crying just being fussy making small noises that Louis thinks is so amazing but scary at the same time. He looks down to her not knowing what to do to settle her. He bounces her a little but nothing works. Matilda is becoming more vocal and Louis starts to panic. 

" Try patting her back." 

Louis nearly drops her at the sound of Harry's voice. He quickly squirms his way across the booth seat to hide his stomach under the table out of view. Louis has no choice but to address him. 

" Harry ..um..Hi." 

Louis who is now patting Matilda's back has noticed she has drifted straight back to sleep. 

" How you been Louis?" 

Harry doesn't say what he really wants to. He wants to tell him he misses him. He wants to ask why he isn't responding to him. He wants to ask again what it is that his done wrong. But he won't because he doesn't want to annoy him anymore or ruin the moment of finally being able to see him again. So he finishes his sentence with a simple.... 

" You look good." 

Louis smiles and he had forgotten just how gorgeous Harry is. He has missed those dimples, those curls, those long legs and green eyes. 

" Thank you. You too. What um brings you here over this side of town?" 

Luke lives about half an hour away from Harry so it seemed odd Harry being there. 

" Oh. Ah, Lexi asked me to stop and grab some bagels. Apparently, the ones here are the only ones she craves. " 

Louis looks down at Matilda upon hearing Lexi's name. Harry was running around town collecting food for his pregnant wife and Louis felt conflicted. He was happy that Harry has stepped up to help Lexi and be there for her but deep down at the same time, he was jealous. He wanted Harry and his support but he knew which option was right and which one wasn't. 

" Who is this little princess?" 

" Oh yeah sorry this is Matilda." 

" My beautiful little angel" Niall responds from behind Harry as he returns from the restroom. 

Harry's smile has diminished now replaced with confusion. Louis can tell Harry's mood has changed. Harry clearly jealous at the cute company Louis was keeping. 

" Harry this is my friend, Niall" 

" Nice to meet you, Harry, Louis and I met at the pre- " 

" Park. While I was on a run. " 

Niall sat looking utterly confused but got the memo when Louis kicked him under the table. 

" You run now? Harry asks. 

" Yeah well, like you said I couldn't afford not to." 

" Louis I - " 

Louis hands Matilda over to Niall. 

" I have to go, it was nice seeing you, Harry. " 

Harry simply nods his head a little disappointed at how their interaction has taken place. He smiles fakely at Niall before turning around and heading towards the counter. Niall gives Louis a questioning look. 

" I will explain later I promise. I do really have to go. Call me ok. " 

For the next few weeks, Louis couldn't stop thinking about Harry. It was driving him insane. He had an appointment with his doctor today and everything was all ok. Leaving the doctor's office Louis didn't worry about hiding his belly the sun's heat was soaring today. Getting into his car he cranked the air con and returned home. 

That leaves us to today. 5 months along. Today is the day that Louis has decided he needs to start doing some shopping. Walking around the mall he enters a baby boutique and is astounded by the prices. Looking around at the prams and cots, and clothes Louis is feeling overwhelmed at how expensive having a baby really is. 

Something weird is happening to him this morning. It's not anything out of the usual for Louis to be thinking of Harry but today Louis is seeing Harry everywhere. Wherever he looks or turns there's some sort of reference or reminder of Harry. 

The bear he picks up is rainbow colours and the reminder of 'buildabear' floods his memory. Leaving the baby shop Louis notices the hairdresser across from him called 
' Harry's barber place'. 
Wanting to leave and go somewhere else he pulls into another smaller mall. Upon entering he stops walking and rubs his eyes, ' surely not'  he thinks to himself. The first place he sees is a men's clothing shop with a phrase written in massive letters on the front window that says 
' STYLES FOR YOU ONLY' 

Surely the universe is just fucking with him right. Or is it a sign that he needs to tell Harry? The rest of the day was surprisingly a success. Louis managed to buy some clothes and bottles along with a couple of teddies and nappies. 

It was 5 pm in the evening and Louis had woken from a tiny nap. With Harry still consuming his worries he still cannot decide what to do. Standing at his kitchen table he picks up one of his coins rolling it in his fingertips. He is reminded of something his mother once told him. 
'When you have a hard decision to make, always flip a coin because when that coin is spinning in the air, you suddenly know which side you are hoping for.' 

So he does just that. Odds are odds. Heads he goes and tells Harry. Tails he moves on and lets Harry and Lexi be happy. He sucks in a huge gulp of air before tossing the coin. He catches the coin and lays it on the table. This is the moment of truth for him. In a few seconds when he removes his hand he will know what to do.......... 

Sometimes doing the 'hardest thing' and doing the 'right thing' are two of the same. The truth of the matter is that we as human beings all know deep down what the right things to do are...the hard part is just doing it. 

Louis can relate to this as he sits in his car outside of Harry's house. Fucking heads!! Why didn't he pick tails? Tails never fails. 

For three minutes he has sat watching the clock tick over on his car dashboard. He looks at himself fixing his hair in the mirror. Finally, after talking to himself like an idiot, he stops trying to convince himself to do this and opens up the car door doing up his jacket zipper. 
' You can do this Louis pull yourself together' 
he softly encourages himself. 

It's the longest walk of his life, his steps striding up the pathway his hands firmly in his jacket pockets. His only meters away from the door when something catches his eye. 

Moving slowly closer, his heart sinks to the ground. There's no other way to describe how he feels. He knew telling Harry to stay with Lexi was the right thing to do but actually now seeing it, was ripping his soul out. 

There in the window, Lexi was laid on the lounge. As Harry approached her he crouches down beside her to kiss her baby bump. Lexi laughed and ran her hands through Harry's hair and Louis couldn't breathe. It's the moment he realised he has fucked up. He has left it too late and seeing Lexi's bump pushes Louis to further want to distance himself. He wants to be happy for them but he can't. 

Louis squints trying not to let the tears escape his eyes. His lost Harry for good. He tried to do what he thought was right and it backfired because now seeing Harry, especially the way he is being with her, he wants that too. He wants Harry to kiss him and his bump, he wants Harry to hug and cuddle him at night. He wants to be the one planning a future together but It's all too late. 

Harry is gone. Elly is gone and he feels alone. He looks down at his belly and realises that maybe... just maybe he might be ok because the only person he has left now..is his and Harry's baby. 

Maturing is realising that at some point you must understand that, 'some people can always stay in your heart but not necessarily in your life.' 

Wanting to leave he turns and starts heading to his car quickly. What Louis doesn't understand is that Harry has just seen him out the window. Fumbling to get his keys in the car door due to his current state of a mini breakdown, he curses himself for not getting the central locking fixed. The car door unlocks at the exact same time he hears Harry. 

" Loueeeh" Harry shouts from his front door. Louis stares at him for a split second. The things he would do right now to be able to run and hug him but instead he opens the door fastens his seatbelt and tries frantically to start the engine but it's too late. Harry is already knocking on the glass. 

Rolling the window down Louis doesn't make eye contact not wanting Harry to see his upset. 

" Hey. What's going on? I looked out the window and saw you walking back to the car did u ring the buzzer we didn't hear anything, I'm so sorry." 

" Lou are you ok?" 

Louis realises he hasn't responded and looks to Harry with pleading eyes. 

" Yeah sorry I ..was gonna come in but I remembered I'm supposed to be somewhere. " 

Harry has known Louis for 5 years and in that time he got to know Louis better than himself. He knows by the way Louis tilts his head a little and bites his nail that his lying. 

" Come inside, please. I haven't seen you in so long. Join us for dinner I've just made lasagne. " 

Harry has been so busy over the last 2 months. He buries himself into his work. He got a promotion which he is proud of but the extra time spent in the office has him exhausted. He hasn't done too much to the house next door. He has upgraded a few appliances and fixed a lock on the outside shed but that's it. Lexi keeps asking and enquiring about who the new owners are and Harry freaks out every time always changing the subject promptly. 

In regards to Lexi, Harry had real trouble being separated from Louis. His insomnia increased and he found it hard to eat. He often sat alone at home staring into space. Lexi knew it was because of Louis's departure and she was saddened to see her husband so distraught. Lexi also being Lexi, took the opportunity to use it to her advantage. 

Morning coffees, backrubs, anything she can do to console him she did. There are a lot of ways to turn someone's attention onto you and Lexi knew how to get Harrys. 

Sex and words. 

Lexi has convinced Harry that being apart from Louis was better in the long run. Time apart was healthy and that focusing on their baby was what was more important. 

No matter how hard Lexi tried Louis has never left his thoughts. 

" Another ti-" 

" Lou please...." 

The desperation in Harry's voice is something Louis can't argue with. Harry smiles when Louis's face softens. He knows his won. Harry opens up the car door for him allowing him to step out. Making sure his jacket is loosely fitted he removes himself from the car turning to lock it. 

To say Lexi was surprised when Louis walked through the door was an understatement. Looking him up and down first Lexi goes to hug him kissing him on the cheek. 

She pulls back making sure to cradle her bump proudly showing it off against her tight white singlet. For obvious reasons, this pisses him off instantly. 

" So nice to see you again Louis." 

Unlike Harry, Louis picks up on her sarcastic tone. He hasn't missed her one bit. 

" You too. You look.....radiant. You are glowing. "  Louis has no idea why he says that. Just trying to be civil he puts it down too. 

Lexi rubs her belly. 

" I guess I am. Harry and I are so happy at the moment. We can't wait to meet this little one. " 

Bitch. That's the first and only word Louis can think of right now. Lexi just had to throw that out there. Regretting his decision to stay for dinner has just multiplied by X100. 

Looking down at the lasagne Louis is ready to dig in. It smells amazing but subconsciously his thinking of croissants covered in peanut butter. 

Harry has always been a great cook. He just loves being in the kitchen. As the three of them are sat around the table Louis notices that Lexi is throwing death stares continuously. He isn't going to ruin the night so he won't question it, ignoring her seemed more fitting but she wasn't going to let that happen. 

" So....tell us, Louis. How's life been without Elly? " 

" LEXI " Harry snaps. 

" Sorry let me re-phrase that. Are you ok on your own now Louis? " 

Louis raises his eyebrows surprised at her sudden bitchyness. 

" A word NOW!!" 

Harry glances at Lexi nodding towards the kitchen. 

" What the fuck is wrong with you? Why are you being like this? " 

Lexi places her hands on her hips. 

" What? Now Louis is back I'm the bitch? I was only asking a question." 

" Yeah rudely. Cut it out. I haven't seen him in so long and I miss him. Don't scare him off. " 

Harry brushes past her missing Lexi rolling her eyes. 

" Sorry, Lou. Her hormones and all" 

Louis smiles half-heartedly understanding all too well how that felt but he couldn't shake the feeling that Lexi wasn't going to let it go and he was right. 

For the next 10 minutes, Harry and Louis laughed and smiled and joked about while Lexi sat there invisible. It was only not too long ago that Lexi had finally swooned her husband back and now Louis was once again regaining all of her husband's attention and she doesn't like it. However, that isn't the only thing that's getting to her. Lexi has another issue with Louis and now that she's watching her husband be the happiest he's been in months she decides that enough is enough and she's not going to sit by and watch this anymore. 

It just so happens to be at the exact time she's thinking all this that Harry's phone rings, to which he explains it's his boss and that he has to take the call. After excusing himself from the table, Lexi acknowledges her chance and takes it in full swing. 

" Lexi I don't know why you are looking at me like that but - " 

" When are you due?" Lexi interrupts. 

Louis spits the water from his mouth choking a little as his throat automatically feels like it's closing over. 

" What ?!?" Louis asks trying to regain his composure. 

" Louis hunny. Let me make this easy for you. I'm a lawyer. I am trained to never miss a clue. I see everything. You don't think I've noticed you declining every beer Harry hands you. You don't think I haven't noticed your swollen ankles and puffier face. Or the fact you are rugged up in a baggy jacket when it's hot as fuck outside. I may be a pretty face Tomlinson but I'm definitely not fucking stupid. " 

Louis laughs. It's all he can think of to do. His fucked... he has no idea on what to say to try and get himself out of this. He doesn't want to admit it to her not without Harry knowing first. This is not how it is supposed to go. 

" What kind of pills are you on Lex, you literally sound delusional. Do you need some sleep or something? Pregnancy fog brain? I've heard that's a thing." 

Lexi just smirks which makes Louis anxious. 

" I think I might just go. Tell Harry I will see him another time." 

Louis stands wiping his face quickly with the serviette. Lexi rises to her feet walking over to him to whisper quietly. 

" No, you won't. Because if you come near him again I promise you, I will make your life a living hell, I will  fucking destroy you, Louis. Do you understand me?" 

Louis is stunned. He can't move. He hasn't never in the entire time he has known Lexi seen her this angry and manipulative. At a last attempt to tell her she's crazy, Louis can only pray to God that she believes him. 

" Look if this is about me kicking Elly out I'm sorry. I know you girls were close and all but ..." 

Lexi lunged forward ripping the buttons open on Louis's jacket revealing his bump. Louis grabs his jacket quickly pulling it back together. 

" I fucking knew it !!!" 

" Lexi shut the fuck up, I can't believe you just did that" Louis snaps. 

Lexi is pushing and pushing for more info and Louis can feel his face getting hotter by the second due to his rising anger. He wants to run and fucking hide because if he has to sit here with her any longer his going to end up with a prison sentence. 

Louis snatches his car keys and goes to sidestep around her but she stops him by grabbing hold of his arm. 

" I seen you. " 

Louis freezes. 

" My regular doctor is going away on holidays and they referred me to another clinic. Last month I was sitting in the carpark about to get out when I saw you exit the building. You didn't have this on." She says tugging his baggy jacket. 

" How far along are you?" 

Louis doesn't know what to do. He doesn't want to tell her. His heart is racing and lord forbid he would hate to see his blood pressure right now. 

Louis succumbs to defeat and lowers his head. 

" 20 weeks." 

Lexi's eyes bulge the moment it hits her. She's 18 weeks which means..... 

"It's Harry's isn't it? " Lexi laughs but it's no ordinary laugh it's pure evil. For the first time, Louis is actually scared of her.  

" My fucking god. Wow. Should have seen it coming. I mean when I saw you I wondered whether it could be his but the shock of you being bisexual was something I wanted to conceal from Harry so... you are welcome that  I kept these details to myself. " 

" Lexi, please... I'm not going to come between you and Harry I promise." 

" So it's definitely his?" She pushes. 

Louis has held it back long enough before the flood of tears makes an entrance. He walks past her making a quick dash for the door and that was enough confirmation that Lexi needed. 

Lexi stood there trying to gather all this new info into her brain. Her husband had cheated. Her husband slept with his best friend. A man. Her husband was not straight. Her husband was having a baby but not just with her but with Louis as well. 

Harry emerged a couple of minutes later from his office shocked to see Lexi alone in the dining room. 

" Where's Lou?" 

Lexi started gathering the plates from around the table throwing them into the sink clearly agitated. 

" What have you done?" 

Lexi shakes her head. 

" Yeah that's right Harry it's all my fault, of course, you would assume it's something I've done because Louis would never be the problem would he?" 

Harry who is too concerned about Louis, knows something big must have happened for Louis to not want to wait to say goodbye. If he was upset that bad. He knew where to find him. 

" I will speak to you when I get back." 

**********
Pulling into the parking space provided he is relieved when he sees Louis's car. It's only a short walk to their spot. Their little getaway hideout. They haven't been here in a while. As he approaches up the slight hill incline he notices Louis sitting on the little wooden bench. He knows his upset by the sound of the faint sniffles. 

Even thou he has apologised time and time again for whatever he had done to him Louis still appears broken. What is hurting Harry more is noticing that Louis is no longer being himself. He has closed himself off to everyone including himself and it's so out of character. He has never been the quiet type, so to see him staring off into the night's stars as he fidgets with his hands Harry's heart breaks. 

He just wants to hold him and comfort him. It's been too long since he felt the security from his embrace. His missed him terribly. He nudges Louis to shuffle over allowing him to sit down next to him. 

" I'm glad I found you here." 

Louis doesn't respond and Harry isn't surprised just saddened. Harry thinks about how it's kind of heartbreaking that strangers can become best friends, just as quickly as best friends can become strangers. 

Louis looks down to his hands that he has pulled up under his jumper sleeves. Harry is trying his hardest not to stare but he hasn't seen him this up close in so long. Deciding not to make things any more awkward he averts his eyes to the sea of yellow night lights of London that is set before him. Their spot. 

Several minutes pass before one bares brave enough to speak. 

" I've missed you, Lou" 

Louis can feel the physical pain in his chest that it causes him from hearing those words. 

" Harry no, don't please." 

Louis has to turn his head away, he doesn't want Harry to witness the hurt that is consuming his face. 

" Louis I'm begging you. Just talk to me. I need to know what's wrong. I hate seeing you like this. Is it something Lexi said? If it was I'm sorry, she's just so moody lately. It's no excuse I know, but you haven't been answering me or coming to see me. It's like you gave up on our friendship and threw it away like you didn't care. If it's about Lexi's pregnancy then I'm sorry. You know how I felt about her and that this baby was not planned. That night with Lexi, you and I had just had our fight and I was severely drunk, it was a moment of weakness, that's all. I swear !!!" 

Harry makes a wrong move by placing the palm of his hand on Louis's thigh. It makes Louis jump up quickly, walking towards the cliff's edge, stopping to place both of his hands over his face. 

He feels the now 'unfamiliar' body behind him. He wants to shift a tiny bit further away but there's too little distance between himself and the drop off. Louis's stress level is through the roof and he knows he needs to calm down. 

Having successfully avoided him for so long Louis is feeling overwhelmed. He can feel his face getting warmer as he lifts his finger to his jumper collar tugging it, in the hopes it will allow a bit more airflow. He doesn't even feel it coming, he can't hide it. He turns sideways hands clasping to his knees as he projectile vomits. 

He hears Harry shuffle along the rocks behind him before he feels Harry's hands gently rub his back. 

" Shit Lou are you ill? You shouldn't be out in the night's air if you are" 

Louis just wishes Harry would shut up. He talks too much and no matter how many times he asks him to not speak he still does. Louis is contemplating kissing him just so he can't talk anymore. But that was just wishful thinking. 

Louis uses the sleeve of his jumper to wipe his mouth. He wants to get home now. He feels like shit probably now looks like shit and being here with Harry is too tempting. 

" I need to leave." 

" Louis no!!! You can't keep running away like this. TALK TO ME "  Harry yells. 

Louis stills. His back turned away from Harry's. Louis throws his head backwards staring to the sky and it makes Harry jump when Louis screams. 

"FUUUUUUUCK" 

Louis turns back around to face him. He had no intention but the words were there all ready to come out, even if Louis didn't want them to. 

" I'm fucking pregnant Harry. "  

Tears were not the only thing of Louis falling to the ground as he removes his jumper letting it collapse down onto the dirt. His rounded belly is now on full display. 

Louis is not game enough to look at him. Harry's impending reaction is sending his anxiety sky-high but nothing happens. Harry is standing there in pure shock. Harry doesn't notice Louis panic as he starts to dart off quickly towards his vehicle now wanting to get far away from here as possible. The last thing Harry hears is the sound of the stones being crunched as he listens to Louis drive away. 

***************

A/N

Thoughts on chapter? 

So Harry knows. 

Lexi knows.

How is poor Harry going to cope ?

Hope you enjoyed. 

If you did please remember to vote, and comment. 

Thanks everyone. 

♡♡♡

Longest chapter yet with 5,400 words. That's literally nearly 2 chapters in one!  :)

# Chapter 18- Boy or Girl?

A/N

So I had a few people message and ask me this, so I think I need to clarify. In the last 

chapter Harry

 was in shock and didn't move or say anything. It was Louis who panicked and drove away. Sorry for 

confusion I

 should have re-worded it better. 

Unlike other 

chapters this

 chapter 

will

 continue on from 

Last

 one. 
Also TW for the F slur in this chapter. 

If a conversation is hard, then it's probably the one worth having. 

Louis has left Harry standing on the cliff, contemplating what he should do now. Louis has confessed he's pregnant, and obviously, Harry doesn't know how to feel about this whole situation. He was just getting used to adjusting to the fact he's having a baby with his wife and was starting to love the idea of their impending arrival and now he has to accept he has a baby on the way with his best friend as well. 

When Harry finally snaps himself out of it, it's too late. He turns to see the dust still lingering in the air from Louis's car, which is now nowhere in sight. 

" Fucckk!" 

Grabbing his phone, he dials Louis's number, and it's diverted to voicemail.
He races to his car, jumping in and speeding home. There's so much going on in Harry's mind that he doesn't notice that he runs 2 red lights and almost rear-ends a car at an intersection.  

Arriving home, Harry enters his house, slamming the front door. 

"Hey babe, where did you go?" Lexi comments acting all sweet and innocent. 

" You know exactly where I went, don't play fucking dumb with me." 

Harry replies walking past Lexi catching her eye roll. Harry knows Lexi has always had a hard time being "nice" to Louis but he hasn't understood fully why until now. 

" So I'm guessing he finally told you?" 

" You knew?!?!" 

Lexis laughs. 

" Only since tonight. Mother's instinct I guess you could say." 

Harry pours himself a glass of scotch downing it in one mouthful. 

It's funny. You never really know the true quality of someone's character until the road becomes rocky. Harry is about to learn this lesson. 

" So you planning that whole ass trip to New York was not only to get rid of me but to seduce our fucking neighbour! Fucking hell Harry....You know, I could handle the way you stopped kissing me. I could handle the way you no longer engaged in deep meaningful conversations or no longer showed any interest in me. I could look past all that in order to save our marriage... but fucking your best friend, my friend's husband....a fucking man!!!! " 

Lexi is fuming. Her face is now the colour of a tomato as she waves her hands in the air frantically with every sentence she makes. Harry knew it would come to this. An argument was bound to happen. He doesn't want to hurt or further upset her, especially when he has the baby inside her to worry about. 

"You just going to stand there and ignore me, Harry? Be a fucking man and admit you are an asshole. A cheating fucking faggot at that!" 

Lexi didn't mean for the word to slip out but it did. Harry's hands are tightly curled up in fists next to his thighs as he stands, his head hung over the kitchen sink. There's anger building up inside of him and his trying his best not to explode. If Lexi doesn't ease up he is worried about what may come. 

"I've never denied you sex Harry not once. Every spare bit of my time has always been devoted to you and yet I still wasn't enough? When we met Louis and Elly, you didn't think I noticed how close you two became so quickly. The way you guys flirted and carried on with each other. Oh my.. I see it all too clearly now!! He fucking stole you from me!! That little lazy fucker did it. Were you guys fucking all along, this entire time? What does he have that I don't huh? GOD DAM IT HARRY ANSWER ME!! Lexi screams. 

Harry really tried but in the end, he lost his own battle to stay calm. He picked up his empty glass turning around and throwing it across the room the sound making Lexi jump. 

Lexi froze as Harry's voice roars throughout the house. 

"JUST FOR ONCE SHUT UP!! JUST FUCKING CLOSE THAT PETTY LITTLE MOUTH OF YOURS. I'M DONE LEXI ABSOLUTELY DONE. YES, I FUCKED LOUIS AND GUESS WHAT, IT WAS A LOT MORE THAN ONCE AND I ENJOYED IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN. BENDING HIM OVER AND THRUSTING INTO HIM GAVE ME MORE SATISFACTION THAN I'VE EVER HAD WITH YOU. YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE CARRYING MY BABY LEXI, REMEMBER THAT THE NEXT TIME YOU DECIDE TO SPEAK BECAUSE I WILL LEAVE YOU ALL ALONE LEXI, I WILL!! DONT FUCKING PUSH ME. THERE MAY BE 2 BABIES ARRIVING DARLING, BUT DONT YOU EVER FORGET THAT I'M ONLY HAPPY ABOUT ONE OF THEM." 

Harry automatically recognises that what he has just implied was 100 % wrong. He regrets his choice of words immediately. He loves both his babies no matter who the other parent is, his anger had just gotten the better of him and lashed out in an attempt to hurt her. Which he clearly had as Lexi doesn't say a word as she walks away no doubt upset as she quietly retreats upstairs. 

Harry heads back to the guest bedroom which is now his recurrent sanctuary. After looking at his phone's bare screen for what seemed like hours he decides to send Louis a message.  

************ 

Meanwhile, Louis is on the edge of having a heart attack on Luke's bathroom floor, as his having a hard time finding it difficult to breathe. Louis is wanting to run and hide from everything, to give himself a chance to 'reset' but it's not that easy. All that Louis could hear was a constant banging on the door followed by Luke yelling. 

"Louis come on! open the door! Please" 

Louis ignores him throwing up in the toilet for the 4th time. His told Harry. Harry knows and yet he didn't say or do anything. That can't be a good sign, Louis repeats over and over again in his head. 

Luke eventually breaks through the door running over to Louis who was currently laying down back pressed to the floor. Luke runs his hand through Louis's hair and talks softly near his face. 

"Louis.. come on, please let me help you up. I will get you to bed." 

Luke guides Louis down onto the bed and tucks him in. 

" Get some rest. I will pop back up in a bit with some water. " 

" Thanks, Luke. I mean it, for everything. " 

Luke sends an endearing smile before turning off the light and leaving the room. Louis as wound up as he was, somehow found it easy to fall asleep. Tonight's activities mixed with his hormones exhausted him and he sleeps for a couple of hours. 

By the time he wakes it's nearing 11 pm. He reaches for his phone and notices a message from Harry.   

From Harry: 

"I'm sorry Lou I truly apologise. I was stunned you could say, absolutely shocked. Please forgive me. I'd love to talk. If you don't mind would you care to meet up? I do really think we need to have a talk about all this. I was thinking of the Beachwood café, tomorrow at noon?" 

Louis stops and re-reads the text a few times over before deciding on how to reply. He knows this talk is inevitable, he knows it needs to happen. He has dreaded this moment for months but it's here. 

To Harry : 

"OK, I'll see you then." 

************** 

Louis has overslept as he had trouble falling back to sleep last night. It's 10.15 am already. Louis rolls out of his bed sideways as the strain is easier on his back that way. His belly is getting larger by the day and sometimes every day activities like getting out of bed are starting to become a hassle. After an extremely quick shower, he moves as fast as he can opening up his cupboard and reaching for a baggy jumper. 

Although Harry is now aware of his pregnancy, he has somewhat gotten used to ' hiding ' his bump as he feels a little insecure about it still. Louis heads downstairs where Luke is sitting at the island bench eating burnt toast. The smell alone makes Louis gag. 

" That's fucking terrible. How can you eat that yuk! " Louis dry reaches. 

" Luke I'm glad you are still home. I know it's your day off and all but remember how my car is playing up. Is there any chance you can drive me somewhere, please? " 

Luke dusts the crumbs off his hands by wiping them on his pants. After swallowing his last mouthful of toast he responds. 

" No worries. Where too?" 

***************  

Harry of course arrives at the Cafe earlier than the arranged time. He hasn't stopped thinking about the fact that Louis is carrying his child. The thought of having one child was overwhelming enough but somehow now knowing he has another baby with Louis on the way, it doesn't stress him out as much as he thought it would and the constant smile on his face proves it. 

The Cafe door swings open, the sound of the bell making Harry quickly turn his head in the direction, his smile falling when he sees not only Louis but Luke as well. 

Louis approaches Harry while Luke continues on to the front counter. 

" Hey. Shit am I late?" Louis asks, his face filled with concern as he notices Harry's 2 cups of coffee in front of him. 

" No..No I just, I got here a bit earlier. I didn't have much sleep last night, needed a bit of caffeine that's all." 

Louis can tell there's more to it than that and debates whether to push it any further or not. He doesn't want to force him into a discussion he doesn't want to have or anything like that, he's just concerned for him. 

" You ok Haz, we can leave this for another time if you prefer." 

Harry who now realises Louis must think his slumber demeanour is caused from his baby announcement, quickly puts a stop to it. 

" Yeah, I'm all good. Lexi and I, well ..you know how she is. We kinda went head to head that's all. Anyway, let's not discuss that right now. How have you been?" 

Louis' nerves disappear as Harry stands, pulling out the seat for Louis to sit down. 

" Since when did you become such a gentleman Mr Styles?" Louis teases as Harry blushes. 

" Since...a part of me started growing inside of you." 

Harry responds making Louis become shy all of a sudden. To break himself out of it, Louis calls out to Luke who had just sat down at a table across the other side of the room. 

" Hey. You don't have to sit over there you can join us if you like. " Louis shouts. 

Luke makes his way over to the table. 

" Harry nice to see you again. Lou, it's fine. Actually, I was just going to go for a stroll through the park across the street, you guys take all the time you need. Call me when you are ready to leave." 

Luke pats Louis's shoulder as Louis works out what Luke is doing. 

" You lying sod. You are chasing that young good looking fella we saw on the way in here aren't ya? " 

Both Louis and Luke laugh as Luke walks away. Harry knows he shouldn't be jealous, he knows they are just friends. There lies the problem because that's exactly how Louis and him started out, so the paranoia will always be there in Harry's eyes. 

"In case you are wondering I didn't mean to bring Luke along. My car has been playing up a little and I asked for a ride." 

Harry nods at the explanation and is glad Louis explained so he didn't have to ask. The atmosphere becomes thick as the 2 realise they are now alone. 

" So...... " 

" yeah... So......" 

Harry hasn't been this nervous in a long time, he wants to address their baby and hopefully, their future but all he can feel and hear right now is his thumping heartbeat. 

" Oh um...Here. I went and got you a little something this morning. I hope you don't mind. I saw it and thought of you and ..I mean if you don't like- " 

" Harry, what is it?" 

Harry picks up the little bag next to his feet handing it to Louis. Opening it up Louis laughs at first but then feels totally in awe that Harry brought it for him, for their baby. A tiny one-piece in neutral colours with a cheeky message about their tattoos.

![](https://img.wattpad.com/4bf113596f919728648219cccfdd10b8a1d67b33/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f67496479776535574f5378416e773d3d2d313233353137383830392e313735323431633138303735383338313934373134313034373438312e6a7067)

" Harry oh my god. Thankyou, you didn't need to do that. That is so cute. Funny but cute. For the record though my tattoos are clearly better by far. " 

Harry winks and the ice has finally been broken. 

" Would you like me to get you anything? A tea? A slice of cake?" 

Louis who is just as nervous as Harry looks back around to the menu board before back at Harry. 

" Do they have croissants here?" 

" I don't think so, no." 

" Fuck. Ok. Never mind. A cuppa would be great thanks." 

When Harry returns the silence is almost deafening. Louis is the one to break it with a simple but effective... 

" I'm sorry." 

Harry knows why he is saying it and seeing Louis look guilty and sad, tears away at his heart strings. 

" It's ok Lou really. I've had time to think about it and I get it. You were scared. I'm not mad at you. Shocked at the whole baby part but I'm happy ok. " 

Harry reaches out placing his hand on top of Louis. The feeling of his big hand covering his own makes Louis warm inside. For a brief moment, they stare into each other's eyes and it's no secret the pair are itching for more contact. Louis pulls his hand back. 

" Shit Hazza. I was only apologising for your lack of enthusiasm to wash that greasy hair of yours but ........"  Louis bursts out with laughter. 

Harry flicks Louis's arm softly as he laughs and both men won't admit how good it felt to be able to throw a bit of banter again. 

" Some things don't change do they, Tomlinson? " 

Louis just smiles. 

" Seriously Harry. You are right. I was scared. Scrap that I am scared. I just. With you and Lexi and Elly. It all became a little too much you know. " 

Louis hasn't spoken of Elly in a while now and Harry used the chance to question him. 

" Have you spoken to her ?" 

" No, I haven't. Harry, there's something I never told you. Elly was cheating with Tom. It's also the reason I kicked her out. Ironic a little isn't it. The cheater got cheated on. " 

Louis's attitude had changed and Harry was quick to comfort him. 

" Far out Lou. I'm so sorry I really am. You cannot think like that, you cannot blame yourself ok. You had thought Elly had been cheating for a long time." 

" It doesn't make it any better though does it?" 

" Lou. Listen to me. None of this is your fault. NONE. Everything happens in life for a reason yeah. You had your doubts about Elly, and yes you cheated, yes your marriage may have fallen apart but Louis ....look at your belly. There is an amazing little human being who is growing inside of you, depending on you. You always wanted a baby Lou, you had told me that many times before. " 

Harry can see that Louis's eyes are filling with water and doesn't know whether he should shut up or not. He doesn't want to. He made the decision on the way here that he was going to lay it all out on the line, tell Louis how he felt and what it is he wants for their future. 

" Louis....This baby is a blessing. You are going to be such a wonderful daddy Lou and I'm so proud of you. I want you to know that I want this. I want it all. I want to witness your ever-growing belly. I want to attend your appointments. I want to look after you for the rest of your pregnancy. I want to be there for the birth. I want .....you Lou.... " 

The look Louis is giving Harry makes him understand he has said too much. 

" Harry"  

Louis's tone softens as Louis feels every feeling coming off of Harry's words. 

" You can't abandon Lexi and your baby Haz, you just can't" 

Harry hurries his hand over the table grabbing both of Louis's hands and clasping them into his own. 

" I'm not abandoning my baby Lou ...just her. I don't want to be with her. I want to be with you. Yes, she is going to have my baby as well and I'm going to love that baby but I can't sit by and pretend that I love her when I'm in love with someone else..." 

Louis is praying like hell that Harry doesn't say it but he does. 

" I'm in love with you" 

Louis blinks as a tear rolls down his cheek. Harry cups his face using his thumb to wipe it away. It's hard for any words to leave Louis's mouth, especially when 30% of himself is trying to convince him that being with Harry is selfish and wrong towards Lexi. While 70% is wanting to lunge forward and wrap his arms around him and kiss him because Harry.... is all he has wanted and thought about every day for the last few months. 

Louis struggles to form any words to produce a sentence on how he feels. He can feel himself getting flustered. He keeps asking himself what to do or say. ' Do I let him in ?' ' Do I allow myself to get close to him again?' 

" Please Louis let me be involved. Don't shut me out." 

It's at this moment Louis feels something he's never felt before. He halts to a still his breath hitching in shock. A wave of movement, a fluttering, bubbly popping feeling deep within his stomach. Harry notices Louis's smile that has appeared on his face as Louis feels like his experiencing someone tickling him from the inside. 

Louis has felt his baby move for the first time, here right now in the cafe with Harry sitting right beside him. He takes this as a sign from above that letting Harry back into his life, is what's best for not only him but for their baby. 

" Harry I would never not allow you to be involved with this baby if that's truly what you want. I just ask you to be there for both babies that's all." 

Harry squeezes Louis's hand tightly. 

" Of course, I will love." 

" I have an appointment tomorrow actually. I'm more than happy for you to come along if you like. 

" I can......pick you up?" Harry questions. 

" Sure.  I will text you the address later." 

Louis stands at the same time as Harry. 

" I've......I've missed you, Harry. " 

Harry engulfs Louis into an affectionate embrace as he kisses the top of Louis's head. 

" Not as much as I've missed you, baby." 

************* 

Having Harry sat beside himself this time around produces a sense of reassurance that maybe just one day, everything might be OK but for now, just having him lounging in the chair next to him is severely soothing. 

" Mr Tomlinson" 

Looking to each other as they stood up, Harry's hand finds its way to Louis's lower back to guide him along. Doctor Payne goes over the same usual questions. ' Are you feeling ok? ' ' Are you taking your vitamins?' ' Any questions' 

" Ok, Louis like last time if you could lay back on the bed there and pull up your shirt we can get onto the measurements and then we can go ahead and have a look at your little one." 

For some reason, it's only just clicked to Louis that Harry is about to see his belly fully exposed and he doesn't know how to feel about it. He decides not to watch Harry's reaction as he lifts up his shirt instead keeping his eyes glued to the TV screen provided. 

" Ok, this is going to be a tad cold, as you are aware." Liam squeezes the gel across Louis's stomach as Louis twitches a little at the sudden coldness. 
The room is silent besides Liam who every now and then asks if Louis is OK. 

" So if you look here. You can see the baby is sucking their thumb. " 
As much as Louis tries he can't hold back his smile as it's the most precious and adorable site he has ever seen. 

" I know I asked last time but I will ask again just to be sure. Are you wanting to know the sex of the baby because right now this baby is in the perfect position and I can already identify their gender. " 

When DR Payne told Louis at his last appointment that when he came in again he could find out whether his baby was a boy or girl he got excited and told him he definitely wanted to know. As sure as he already was, Louis rolled his head to the side looking at Harry who was sitting beside him in the chair. 

Louis didn't have to physically ask Harry as Harry had already understood the knowing question at hand. 

" Oh yeah I mean I'd definitely like to find out but I mean it's up to you Lou honestly. I won't mind either way." 

Louis looked to Liam and nodded his head. 

" Yes, please. I'd love to know." 

Watching the baby move about on the screen, Liam turned his body towards Louis and smiled. Louis knew this moment was about to change his life and it was indeed a tiny bit scary but at the same moment, he felt a hand cover his own and Harry like usual had completely comforted him. 

" Congratulations guys." 

Harry who has tears streaming down his face completely overcome with emotions leans forward kissing Louis's forehead. Louis doesn't even comprehend what Harry has done or even care at that point because right now after hearing the gender of his baby he is over the fucking moon delighted at the news. 

" So I will see you again in 4 weeks. Keep hydrated get lots of rest and again congrats. Here " 

Liam hands Louis a towel to wipe his belly. 

" It was nice seeing you again." 

Liam goes to walk out the door while Harry notices how Louis wipes the gel so fast hardly touching his skin. 

As Louis stands re-adjusting his shirt Harry takes the opportunity to try and spend more time with him. 

" Are you hungry at all? Celebratory lunch on me? I hear they make killer meals at that new burger place a few blocks from here." 

Louis's eyes light up excitedly. 

" Yes, I am starving Harold. Thankyou. Although croissants smothered in peanut butter sounds amazing right about now." 

Louis laughs as Harry screws his face in disgust. 

" Ewe. Is that some weird craving you have because that sounds atrocious, yuk."  The pair laugh as they exit out back into the main waiting area. It's all fun and giggles until they are met with Lexi's Burning gaze.  

Harry stares back at her confused. Lexi is pissed and her death stares toward Louis has Harry concerned about Louis's safety. 

" Lex, what are you doing here?" 

Lexi scoffs and eyes the room. 

" Gee Harry I dunno. What could I be possibly doing here in an obstetric clinic? " 

Her sarcastic tone eats away at Harry. 

" That's not what I meant and you know it. Your appointment was next week, was it not?" 

Lexi focuses back on Louis while she answers Harry's question. Louis just wants to leave, he knows his presence is making things awkward. 

" Well, I guess if you weren't so caught up with Mr Twink over there, you would have known my appointment was changed to this afternoon." 

Louis is utterly thankful that there are no other patients left in the waiting room and it's just the 3 of them alone because Lexi's words had just severely embarrassed him. Louis doesn't want the drama, he doesn't want to add to this unpleasant and already difficult situation they are all in. He smiles sadly at Harry. 

" Another time yeah. " Louis goes to leave but Harry stops him with a hand to his forearm. 

" Hey, I'm sorry about her. We can still go get food I can just tell her - " 

" No Harry don't do that. Go to your baby's appointment, please. I will text you later, I promise. " 

Harry watches Louis leave before sitting down next to Lexi. 

" Wow Harry if it's too much of a problem for you to be here, don't stay on my account." 

Harry shakes his head at her. Looking her in the eyes he lowers his voice. 

" When we get home. You and I are going to have a serious chat. Stop with the bullshit coming out of your mouth or so help me God I will - " 

" Lexi Styles" 

Liam notices Harry and is taken aback. 

" After you, darling" Harry says to his wife as he holds out a hand helping her rise to her feet. 

To say Liam was confused was an understatement but professional as he was, he didn't question or make mention of it. 

Lexi and Harry sat quietly during her scan, seems today he also found out the gender of his other baby. Lexi and Harry were bringing a little baby girl into the world. 

************* 

Later that night Louis stands in front of his mirror, taking yet another picture for his scrapbook before jumping into bed. 

Laying on his side thinking about how life with Harry and baby could possibly look, he realises it's exactly what he wants. He smiles as he is unexpectedly hit with an unfamiliar feeling as he feels the baby move once again. 

Louis instinctively rubs his belly for the first time. When he realises what his doing, he smiles and says: 

" Hello there my baby girl, daddy can feel you. I love you." 

And with that, Louis has never felt more comfortable and content in his entire life.  

**************

A/N

So Harry is expecting two 

baby

 girls. Louis has finally connected 

with

 his baby and Harry and Louis are on the mend. 

Thoughts on chapter? 

Sorry for the long wait. I had 

writers

 block and have been a bit busy. 

Sorry

.

Don't

 forget to vote, comment and share. Thanks everyone.

♡♡♡

# Chapter 19 - Renovated

The changes that your body goes through while being pregnant is naturally beautiful, yet it can also be completely over whelming and some what daunting. Through the months your body undoubtedly changes and its easy to start feeling 'fat' or 
' Uncomfortable' in your own skin. 
Looking in the mirror you will notice that parts of yourself may have grown 'wider' and more ' rounder' but however that makes you feel, always remember the reason why its changing. Your body is producing life that is growing more and more each and every day and that is a true blessing. At the end of it all when you finally get to look into your babies eyes, you will realise that every little stretch mark and weight gain was totally worth it. 

Louis is currently cussing to himself as he sits back down onto his bed in pure frustration. Having forgotten his need to buy bigger jeans, he currently now has zero 'going out' jeans that fit him. He had been getting by with just leaving his button undone but as time is ticking on he has found his thighs have also expanded a little, his favoured and only fitting jeans now no longer able to proceed pass the top of his legs.

Louis picks up his phone after hearing his message notification. 

From Harry:

" I will be there soon X" 

Louis texts back immediately. 

To Harry:

" I don't think I can go, I'm too busy."

From Harry:

" Doing what?" 

To Harry:

" Being fat" 

As expected Louis phone starts ringing. 

" Hel-" 

Louis doesn't even get the opportunity to finish saying hello before Harry interrupts.

" Lou you are not fat, you are pregnant"

Hearing those words should have made him feel a little better, it didn't fully but hearing it from Harry who he knew was trying to make him see his weight gain differently did settle his body insecurity even if it was only a tiny bit. 

" I've just pulled up out front." 

Louis has been looking forward to seeing Harry. Unfortunately the pair haven't seen each other in over 2 weeks since Louis last scan. For some un-known reason Harry had been really quiet. Louis had texted and called multiply times trying to meet up but Harry kept putting it off with excuses like ' sorry im working late' or ' im really busy sorry' and Louis was starting to think Harry had changed his mind about them and chosen Lexi.

His heightened emotions has had his feelings all up and over the place this week, so when Harry had called suggesting a lunch date Louis finally relaxed a little. Louis grabbed some sweat pants and a large jumper surrendering to being 'comfortable' over being 'fashionable' praying that Harry isn't going to be put off by his appearance. 

Opening the car door Louis eyes flick to Harry's who is looking him up and down. 

" Hey beautiful" Harry smiles. 

Louis face flushes as he pushes his fringe out of his face.

" You are only saying that because you feel obliged too because I said I was fat." 

Harry frowned. 

" Don't ever put yourself down Lou ok. You look amazing no matter what you wear. I mean with clothes, without clothes you are fucking beautiful" He says raising his eyes suggestively as they both laugh. 

Harry has missed Louis like crazy these past 2 weeks. Its no lie, Harry has been flat out over exerting himself. As he sits admiring the beauty beside him, he is craving to kiss him but his not 100% on where they stand yet so he holds it back. He hopes that today him and Lou can have a talk about their future and what it may hold. Harry would also like to fill Louis in on the big conversation he has had with Lexi but he needs to wait for the right time.

Harry pulls out onto the road, turning the opposite direction from the way they were suppose to be going. 

" Um...Haz You made a left turn, we needed to go right. " 

Without Looking his way Harry responds.

" Actually we are going the correct way."

Louis gives Harry a questioning look.

" What are you up too styles?" 

Louis asks when he sees Harrys 
' I've done something bad and I'm guilty'
 look.

" You will just have to wait and see." 

Driving along Louis feels complete again. With Harry next to him and his baby slowly moving around in side of him, he cant help but rest his head on the window gazing out at the scenery to avoid Harry witnessing him smiling like an idiot.

In Louis mind, this moment couldn't get any more perfect but all of a sudden it does. Louis lowers his eyes to discover where the sudden warmth had come from. Harry had placed his hand onto Louis thigh while smiling like a Cheshire cat, waiting for Louis response and he got one the moment Louis lowered his own hand cupping the top of Harry's. 

" Eyes on the road Mister!" Louis joked trying to disguise his blushing cheeks.

To say both were the happiest they have been in months, would most definitely not be a lie.

" Did you forget something at home?" 

Harry pulls into his driveway turning off the engine. 

" No Lou I didn't." 

Harry exits the car, making his way around the vehicle to open Louis door. Louis surprised by the action steps out smiling. 

" Thankyou, but what has gotten into today H and why the fuck do you look so.....anxious? all of a sudden?" 

Louis is right, Harry as excited as he was prior to arriving, has lost all colour from his face, his hands becoming sweaty as nerves take over him.

" Harry?"

Louis voice now becoming concerned as he watched Harry take a deep breath slowly blowing air out of his mouth. 

" follow me ok. " Harry says timidly. 

Louis confused as he is, reaches out accepting Harry's offered hand letting Harry slowly pull him along...until they crossed over into Louis old yard. 

" Harry what the hell? What are you doing? We can't go over there."

Harry stops dead in his tracks turning to face him.

" yes we can it's ok. Trust me."

Louis's mouth falls open.

" Oh my god, you made friends with the new owners. What are they like? Family ? Single ? kids? Oh fuck Harry I can't meet anyone I'm not dressed properly." 

Harry grins. He tried the best he could to retain it but Louis's babbling was just too cute to interfere with.
  
" Lou. Stop. Breathe. We are not meeting anyone ok. Just...just promise me ......you are not going to be mad." 

"Okkkk....." Louis dragged out.

The moment the words left his mouth he grabbed Louis softly pulling him along stopping when they arrived at the front door. The curiosity had somehow silenced Louis and Harry was trembling from head to toe. He has no idea how Louis is going to react to this. He has a innocent heart of gold but get on his bad side and boom you are met with the Tomlinson wrath of fury. 

What's making matters worse is that they have only just patched things up between them and now, Harry could have well and truly fucked it all up again returning them to ground 0. With his voice now shaky he goes ahead to speak. 

" Just remember you promised."

"Now you are scaring me Harry."

Giving his lips a lick over and producing a small nervous smile, he reached into his pocket pulling out the key and sliding it into the lock. He wasn't game enough to face him, instead pushing the door open. He was about to walk in when he felt Louis tug his arm. 

"Harry how do you have keys and what are we doing here? I'm not stepping in there without an explanation. What's going on?" 
Lou demanded and Harry understood that it was time to confess. 

" We had a lunch date remember. " 

Louis was confused by Harry's happiness and was starting to wonder whether Harry was over worked and under slept. He was starting to sound crazy. 

" Yes! So let's go then." 

"We are here. We are having lunch in your kitchen." 

Louis was now sure Harry was sleep deprived and loosing the plot because his pretty sure Harry just said 
'your kitchen' as in present tense. 

" My kitchen?" Louis questions needing confirmation that he had heard correctly. 

" Yes your kitchen. Well mine technically"
( Harry dangles the keys in the air ) "but no it's your kitchen." 

Harry is standing there waiting for Louis to unravel his anger but nothing happens. Louis has frozen. There's no words or any movement from him. Harry is generally concerned fearing he may have gone into shock. 

" Lou please say something. " 

Harry wraps his arm around Louis waist gently guiding him through the door. Still without any words Louis eyes buldge open noticing the significant change. The walls have all had a fresh coat of paint and Louis notices the slight change of colour. Realising now that it can't get any worse Harry pulls him into the kitchen to show him the upgraded appliances and new bench tops. 

Harry can see Louis looks as though he is going to cry but what he can't distinguish is whether if it's because it's tears of joy or out of anger. 

" I fixed up the shed out back. It's fully functional again. As you can see I've re-done the kitchen, the entirety of the house has been painted and yeah I brought some new furniture for you. Kind of thought you might like a complete fresh start. Of course if you dont like anything you can change it." 

It's then Louis looks around the space his in noticing the new lounge and dining table. There's alot going on in his head. He is happy, his shocked and suprised. He is over whelmed and his angry. Too many emotions are flowing and Louis can not tell which one is winning. Letting out a small sigh Louis finally connects eyes with Harry's. He can see the anxiety pouring out of Harry as he stands there biting at his nail. 

" Harry this....this is nice, it's amazing actually but...I can not except this."  

At first Harry is relieved with Louis response but like some twisted line of fate, Louis turns into Jekyll and Hyde. 

" Harry how the fuck did you do this? You must have spent your entire savings. Are you fucking mad?.....A house...you brought me a bloody house.....my god how did you get lexi to agree to this?" 

Harry didn't have to verbally reply because the fear in his eyes spoke for him. 

" She doesn't fucking know!!!!!! Oh great, thats just fucking great. Another reason for her to hate on me."  Louis exclaims rather loudly. 

He knew Louis would be upset, so he was expecting some sort of outburst. Louis was now pacing back and forth across the kitchen, his hands buried in his face. 

" Why did you do this ?"

Louis quiet tone now reinstated.
Harry walked close to him grasping on to each of his biceps. 

" Louis I don't know how much more plain and simple I can put this...
I love you ok. 
I have loved you for such a long time actually. You mean the world to me. I told you a long time ago that I would do anything for you and I still will, and I will continue to, for the rest of my life." 

Harry cups Louis face.

" I know you are upset with me and I understand why but I couldn't lose you. I couldn't let you lose your home. My name may be on the paperwork but the house is yours Lou. It always has been and always will be. Money is nothing to me, the only thing I care about is you and our little girl." 

A tear falls down Louis cheek as Harry lowers his hand to caress Louis bump. The move terrified Louis at first as Harry hasn't touched his bump properly before. 

" Initally I brought this house back for you but now....
(he circles his hand over Louis tummy) it's for both of you. I love you Louis Tomlinson and I want us to be a family, you me and our daughter Lou ....it's ok if you don't- " 

Louis interrupts Harry by connecting their lips for a brief second. He buries his head into Harry's chest squeezing him tightly. 

" I don't know how to thank you or ever repay you." 

" You can start by saying you will accept me as your partner." he says with a hopeful grin. 

" Yes omg yes of course!! Sorry this has just been so over whelming I..I really can not believe this is happening. " 
Louis grabs hold of Harry's hand entwining their fingers. 

" This is beautiful Harry. Thankyou really. " 

Harry sucks in his bottom lip before securely biting it in anticipation. 

" Um Lou. I have one more suprise for you. " 

Louis smile faded. 

" Harry I swear to fucking god if you tell me you have brought me a new car or something I'm going to loose my shit at you. " 

Harry lets out a laugh accidentally making Louis suspiciously raise an eyebrow. 

" You better not have!!!" 

" No No No.....no car I promise. Although you did say your car was playing up so - " 

" HARRY " Louis warns. 

" Follow me. " 

Making their way up to the top floor Harry smiles at himself while he makes a mental note to indeed start looking for a new family car. After all, it was needed. 
Harry came to a halt in front of Louis small old guest room. 

" Now remember you said earlier you wouldn't get mad. " 

Louis is worried. 

" What have you done?" 

" I will show you instead." 

Harry pushes open the door, exposing his suprise. Louis hand is slapped to his mouth as he gasped. Looking around the room quickly was enough before Louis completely broke down. He turned to Harry not being about to form any words. Tears streamed down his face. He collapsed forward onto Harry who caught him. Harry pulled him in tight caressing his back as Louis let out a small sob. 

Wiping his face and pulling himself together. He slowly entered the room taking it all in. His eyes were skimming around the most gorgeous and stunning nursery he had ever seen. 3 times Louis went to speak and 3 times no words escaped his mouth . 

He was totally speechless.

![](https://img.wattpad.com/ce504ea4d6daa27e4eb17f787cd0c9fc903e9132/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6c6b4f494e6e3741514b316466513d3d2d37312e313666393733656339656461633731323134343135363731343232362e6a7067)

" Told you I had been busy." 
Harry whispered into his ear. 

" My god Harry. This ..all this..." 

Louis starts to quietly sob as he walks in further examining the cot closer as he once again wipes away his tears.
Harry is feeling the moment and decides to test the waters. He approaches Louis from behind wrapping his arms around his waist nuzzling his head into the crook of Louis neck. Feeling Louis lean into his touch he turns his head slightly to place a placid peck to his neck before pulling back. Louis turns around facing him. 

Louis doesn't know if it's because of his hormones or the fact his so overwhlemed or whether it just felt like the perfect time as the beating of his heart rapidly increased but the words slipped off his tongue so smoothly and eagerly. 

" Harry....I...I love you." 

It was Harry's turn to leak water from his eyes as he leant forward resting his forehead to Louis. 

" You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that Lou."

Harry drops to both of his knees.

" Harry wtf no!! Not here in the babies room " Louis says horrified.

Harry laughs.

" Get your head out of the gutter Lou I'm not... No... that's not what I'm doing." 

Harry lifts up Louis jumper unexpectedly and Louis, who normally would have freaked out....doesn't. 

He closes his eyes feeling both of Harry's warm hands being placed on either side of his belly. It wasnt suppose to be loud enough for Louis to hear but he does. 
" I love you too baby girl" 
The moment he feels Harry's lips softly kiss the area next to his belly button he smiles because this....this is what he has wanted. Harry is here with him, done all this for him and their baby. Harry is kissing him and nothing could ever ruin this day, nothing because it's in this moment that they both realise that they are finally where they belong..... Home.

Harry has Louis and Louis has Harry.

" So im guessing you like it?" 

" Oh I love it...but... I'm trying to be mad at you Styles and your making it very difficult. " 

Harry rises to his feet grabbing Louis by the bottom of his jumper tugging him in closer. Staring at his lips, Harry whos index finger is placed under Louis chin, uses his thumb to slowly brush along Louis bottom lip, before closing the gap connecting their lips.

Having both waited for this moment for so long it makes complete sense that neither one of them wanted to pull away. 

" You hungry now?"  Harry smiles.
" because after I make you something to eat we are off to the mall to buy you some new pants. " 

" Oh ok. Yeah you know what, I'm not even going to fight you on that one. " 

************

Harry doesn't hold back buying new clothes, even convincing Louis to wear proper maternity jeans. It's been the best day but Louis is getting tired.

" Haz, I really don't mean to be a buzz kill and all but I need to lay down I'm kind of exhausted." 

Harry who is carrying a shit tonne of shopping bags lowers them to the ground. 

" No worries love. Look take a seat. I have one more thing to get. Rest here and I will be right back." 

Harry walks off promptly as Louis relaxes down onto the wooden bench just glad to be off his feet. With his hand rested on his belly he closes his eyes for what felt like a few seconds. He feels someone shaking his arm. 

" Lou ..hey..I'm back. Let's get you home so you can nap properly. " 

Harry extends his arm out helping Louis rise to his feet. Louis notices the 'Babies R us' bag and gets excited. 

" What do you have there?" 

Louis leans forward quickly pecking his lips. 

" Curiosity killed the cat you know. " Harry laughs back. 

" Lucky I'm not a cat then." Louis retorts. 

Harry hands the bag over allowing Louis to peak inside. 

" How did you...Shit you remembered ?" 

Harry smiles. 

" Of course I did. I mean, I didn't understand why you were so smitten with it but I do now. So I wanted you to have it." 

Louis looks back in the bag at the cot mobile he had fell in love with months ago. 

![](https://img.wattpad.com/d06a6b0eab3f770c8dc98f8163970fb502d2f4c7/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f444b4d4748414a65424d753842413d3d2d313233373133383637372e313666396131333965633432303832643237373432313231303732322e6a7067)

Louis hugs Harry tightly. 

" You are too kind to me baby. Thankyou. " 

As good as it feels the two of them embraced with each other in the foyer of the mall, they are snapped out of their own little bubble back into reality when they hear a loud intentional cough.

Both of them spinning around, Louis immediately notices the two sets of eyes that are flicking from Harry to his own stomach. 

FUCK!!! 

Louis instantly goes into panic mode as Harry is un sure of how Louis wants this to go down, instinctively places his hand to the lower part of Louis back for support. 

Louis stutters, being the first to speak. 

" Um...Elly..Tom...hi.." 

***************

A/N

Thoughts on chapter. 

Favourite part? 

How do you think Elly is going to react ???? 

Please don't forget to vote and comment. 
Thankyou all for your on-going support. 

♡♡♡

# Chapter 20- A Understanding

Two words comprising of six letters. It's easy to say, however hard to explain and even harder to accomplish.

" MOVE ON"

*************

Lexi lays back against her pillow on the bed, tears pooling in her eyes. Harry slides across the bed to sit beside her allowing her head to fall to his shoulders. He places his arm around her, guilt rushing through him. 

" I'm so sorry Lex" 

1

hour earlier/ several days ago

It was the talk he knew he had to have. Lexi had been out of line with the way she treated Louis and he couldn't stand it any longer. The moment he walked through the front door from work he drops his keys onto 

the

 counter, loosening his tie as he tiredly made his way up the stairs. 

He stops in her doorway, watching her as she turns another page of her book. The sight is familiar as he has witnessed the scene before him many times over the years. Finally sensing his 

presence Lexi lifts her head offering a small but sweet smile. The notion makes him anxious as he knows what it is that he has to do.
 

He

 has 

memorised

 every word he wants to say, spent hours upon hours thinking 

over

 his decisions. The house is quiet which is normal, the only sound being heard coming from that of his own conscious. 

" Hey. I made you dinner 

it's

 in the oven. " 

With just one look Lexi realises Harry has something on his mind. She knows this by the way Harry is picking at his palms and the way he's looking all around the room to anywhere but towards her. He lowers his head to the ground in front of him. 

" We need to talk." 

Harry

 starts pacing the room and Lexi already understands where this conversation is going to go. 

She's

 been waiting for it, she knew it was coming...her husband had given up on their marriage........on her. Having tried to 

prepare

 herself for this 

moment

 she 

had

 underestimated how much her heart would truly ache. 

" I ........."
 
Harry starts before again stopping himself.

Harry walks over to the bed, carefully sitting 

down 

beside

 her, his head falling back to the ground. 

" I have loved you 

since

 we were 18. We got married so young and ...." 

" Harry please 

don't

 leave me"
 

Lexi's voice is soft, trembling as the words roll off her tongue. 

The sudden words rip through 

Harry's

 chest. 

He can hear the fear and desperation and it does truly break his heart. 

" Lex I really hope you listen to me ok. I need you to hear this." 

Closing the book she re-adjusts herself sitting up a little taller placing one of her hands on her belly to where she stares because she knows if she looks at him ......she's going to cry.

" 

Don't

 ever doubt my love for you. You were the first person who 

loved

 me for me. Supported me, cared for me and we have 

shared

 some of the most fun and beautiful memories that I will always cherish. 

We've

 enjoyed life together, we had made a home, hell we have even made a baby." 

Harry places his hand on top of Lexi's bump. She still 

can't

 bring herself to look at him yet. 

" 

You know me deep down to my roots, which means you also understand that this has not been easy for me. You are an amazing woman Lexi and I don't want you to think that this decision is your fault or something you have done wrong ok."

Harry grabs hold of her hand squeezing it gently.

" I love this baby Lexi and I promise to you I am going to try and be the best dad I can be. Please listen when I say to you that you won't be alone, I will co-parent and support you." 

Lexi still hasn't said a word or even looked at him yet and he doesn't know whether it's a good or bad sign. 

" I love you, Lexi. I will continue to love you.....just not in the way you would like me to." 

It's at this moment Lexi decides to finally connect their eyes. Tears currently strolling down her cheeks. Harry out of habit goes to wipe her face but Lexi stops him. It is not done in spite but rather in respect. Harry leans over opting to provide her with a tissue instead. After cleaning her cheeks she rubs her belly gently before eventually deciding to speak. 

" You really love him don't you?" 

Harry blinks rapidly in deep thought as he watches Lexi's fingers circulate in small circles across her large stomach. He doesn't want to lie to her, the whole idea of this conversation was to be all open and honest but he knows if he answers truthfully it's going to crush her. He takes a deep breath letting out a nervous sigh which is caught by Lexi. She already has her answer. 

" With Lou, I feel...When he is around I just.... he..." 

Harry tries multiple times to say it without hurting her but nothing sounds sincere.

" Yes, I do. I love him." 

Lexi doesn't respond. Slowly pushing aside the blanket she vacated the bed walking into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. He doesn't follow, he knows she needs space so he allows it. He continues to sit there still on the bed. Thinking back to their wedding day he never would have thought that they would be here right now in this situation. Hearing the door open again several minutes later, Lexi approaches her walk-in cupboard grabbing her dressing robe. 

" Cup of tea?" 

She asks.

Harry looks at her confused. He was awaiting the backlash of her anger or an outburst at least. Maybe it's still to come. He nods his head and follows her as she exits the door making her way downstairs to the kitchen. 

With the two now sitting in silence face to face at the kitchen table it's Lexi's turn to voice her emotions. 

" What's going to happen to the house?" 

Harry frowns. This is not how he expected her to start this. It's also something he hadn't thought a lot about yet.

" There's no question there Lexi the house is yours. I'm not going to uproot you and my daughter. If anyone leaves it will be me." 

" And where will you go? To him?" 

Harry pulls at his bottom lip. He hasn't got a clue what he is going to do. He and Louis hadn't spoken about living arrangements or what their plans were. He is however glad that Lexi is asking kindly and calmly, nothing like he had expected
.

" I'm not 100% sure on details yet. I would ask that you allow me to stay here until the baby is born, like I said I'm not going to leave you alone. I also ask that you allow me to come back and forth freely once the baby has been born for the first few weeks." 

Lexi just nods her head in agreement. 

" I'm not going to keep you away from her Harry. You can do as you please. Am I hurt and saddened about us? Yes. Am I happy about you and Louis? No." 

Here it comes. Harry had been waiting for it. The conversation up until now had gone too smoothly. He knew it must have been the calm before the storm.

" Do you know how humiliating it feels to have to explain to my family that my husband is not only expecting a child with me but also with the man next door? " 

Harry is thankful her tone is low. He was anticipating a screaming match but it didn't arrive. He can see her hands shaking and her lip quivering. 

" I'm sorry."

Harry suffers from the remorse he is experiencing. He hadn't thought about how hard that would be for her and her family. 

" I don't want to hear that you are sorry Harry. You know Louis and I were never too close but he was still a neighbour, a friend, my best friend's husband. It's still a lot to take in. It hurts a lot, Harry. It really fucking hurts. Seeing Louis bump, you don't know what that did to me. Knowing it's my husband's baby. It kills me because you may not be in love with me still but my feelings towards you haven't changed. " 

" I know you probably don't see my point of view or even want to know but this whole situation hasn't been easy on me either. I hadn't planned to fall in love with my best mate. I didn't plan to have sex or get him pregnant. This is all new to me too and I'm hurting about ending our time together Lex. It wasn't something I just thought about on the spot. It's been a long time coming. I think you also knew deep down that things between us were getting rocky. " 

Lexi wipes her eyes while Harry stares off into space. His phone rings and he totally ignores it. He knows it's Louis but he wants Lexi to know she has his full attention at this delicate time.

" I don't want him in my house." Lexi suddenly says. 

" That's fair." 

Lexi becomes a little restless and Harry can see she wants to say something but she's holding back. 

" Lexi please say whatever it is that you want to say. I want you to open up to me. We need this all out in the open. We need to discuss and agree on how all of this is going to go ahead. Now is the time to let it all out."

Lexi picks at her fingernails. 

" I don't hate Louis, Harry I just want you to know that. If anything I'm jealous of him. I always have been." 

Harry is surprised at what he's hearing. 

" I have always, I guess in the back of my mind had some sort of idea about how close you guys were becoming. He always made you laugh when I couldn't. Those beautiful dimples of yours only came out for viewing whenever he was around. Whenever you needed to discuss work or any problems you always went straight to him...never me." 

Hearing it like that Harry feels like shit right about now. 

" I know he is a nice person. His cute and has a great personality that everybody falls in love with. I kind of feel that's why I was a slight bit nasty towards him. I don't despise him, Harry, I want to be him. Because if I was him then id still 

have

 you. " 

Harry reaches out to entwine their fingers. 

" I know you didn't want this baby Harry but please just please I beg of you, don't treat her any different 

to

 your other baby. " 

Harry slides into the bed next to her. 

" I may never have planned this baby but she's here and I love her already Lexi that I can promise you." 

Lexi grabs another tissue blowing her nose. 

" I'm not going to cause you guys any trouble I promise." 

Lexi lays back against her pillow on the bed, tears pooling in her eyes. Harry slides across the bed closer to sit beside her allowing her head to fall to his shoulders. He places his arm around her, guilt rushing through him. 

" I'm so sorry Lex"

Tonight Lexi has learned a hard life lesson:

'
It's painful to say goodbye to someone that you don't wish to let go but it's more painful to ask someone to stay when you know they want to leave.' 

~~~PRESENT TIME~~~

" Louis nice to see you again" 

Tom extends his arm out in an attempt to shake his hand. Louis knows it is the decent thing to do, he was raised with manners but he can not help but feel like ripping his fucking throat out as he stares at his hand. No matter how polite Tom is being here in public, all Louis sees is the man who fucked his wife. 

Although Louis has mostly healed and moved on from Elly, now having the pair stand in front of him proved to be harder than he had imagined as the past feelings of anger and hurt swarmed back in. Harry wasn't oblivious, he too could see how hurt Louis was feeling and if Harry could see it then Elly probably did too. 

Harry gently rubbed the middle of Louis's back to remind him to stay calm and that he was there for him. Elly was yet to speak. Her eyes haven't deviated from Louis's large pregnant belly. Noticing her gaze Louis protectively tries to 'cover his stomach' 

" Your pregnant?" 

Elly doesn't look happy. Tom is surprised by her tone. Elly looks back and forth from Louis to Harry. 

" So you had the audacity to kick me out for cheating but here you are fully fucking pregnant so quickly" 

Tom leans closer to Elly. 

" Hey c'mon let's go yeah." 

Elly acts as though she hasn't heard him, her gaze now on Harry. 

" Well aren't you a catch. Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't your own wife knocked up? What one baby and wife, not enough for you Harry?" 

There's steam pouring out of Harry's nostrils. He's ready to pounce and protect but the inner anger of Louis has already been let loose. 

" You fucking bitch, shut your fucking mouth! How dare you say anything about Harry while your own little toy boy is standing right beside you. Yeah, I'm pregnant with Harry's baby so what!! What's the big fucking deal huh? You never wanted a baby remember! " 

Louis's wrath comes out a little too loud and has now gained the attention of the shoppers close by who have all stopped to listen. 

" What the fuck are you all staring at?" Louis screams. 

Harry tugs on Louis's arm trying to hint at leaving. He knows it's best to leave. This has been embarrassing enough and the adrenaline that's racing through him right now is probably not good for his baby. He turns to leave when he notices a big sparkly ring on Elly's finger and it's not the one he had brought her. 

"Wow, holy fucking shit wow!!!! You really don't mess around do ya? A few months is all it only took for you to completely move on and get engaged and yet you have the nerve to mention my baby!! What's the rush? You run out of money?" 

" FUCK YOU LOUIS" Elly screams. 

Harry's had enough. He forcefully pulls Louis's arm guiding him away from her. 

" Fucking bitch" Louis mumbles.
He's still too worked up and turns back again. 

" Good luck with that one Tom....and oh a word of warning, hide your fucking credit cards!!" 

Elly sticks her fingers up and Louis smirks. 

Harry as proud as he is of Louis finally allowing himself to unleash his built-up anger with the whole situation, he really just what's to get him home and calm him down.

On the drive home, Louis is reasonably quiet. He hates himself for the way he has acted especially inside the shops. Most importantly he feels a little confused and hurt within himself that he let Elly get to him like that. He can't help but think Harry might have taken his reaction the wrong way. He doesn't want him thinking he lost his shit cos he missed Elly and he was jealous, that most certainly wasn't the reason at all.

" Hey, I'm sorry for all that back there. I didn't mean to go off the way I did. I not only embarrassed myself but you as well." 

Harry who is driving takes his eyes off the road for a split second to give him a small smile. 

" Hey don't worry love. You said what you needed to. Hopefully, you don't see her again any time soon. I'm just glad you have settled down now." Harry flicks his eyes to Louis's belly. 

" I wasn't jealous or anything Haz, she just....she just got under my skin. I dunno maybe it's my hormones." 

" Louis it's ok. I get it. I also had a run-in with Lexi the other night. Well, not so much a run in but we had a good talk. I um...told her we are over and that my life is with you now. She was hurt but she's ok Louis. " 

Louis who was genuinely concerned by the news gave a small but worried smile.

" I will tell you more about it when we get back to yours" Harry says before returning his attention back to the road. 

" Ours" Louis says quietly. 

" What was that babe?" Asks Harry who genuinely didn't catch what he had said. 

" I said, Ours. Our house." 

Harry slows the car down quickly pulling off to the side of the road and coming to a stop. Harry turns to face Louis fully. 

" Are you saying what I think you are saying.?" 

" Yes. " Louis blushes. 

" I mean only if you want to" 

Harry would be lying if he didn't admit how fucking happy he felt right now. He knows he had promised Lexi to be there for her. Which he still will be. That he can guarantee.

Harry is hoping that he has enough stamina to work his magic back and forth between the houses. 

What he hopes most is that Lexi doesn't get mad about this, because he also still needs to explain how it is that Louis is moving back in next door".

" I'd love to baby. There's no other place id rather be." 

*************

# Chapter 21- Balancing 

A/N 

I truly apologise for the long wait.

:(  I've had a lot of stuff going on. I have tried to make up for it with a longer chapter. Normal chapters are 3000 words this one is 6300 it's pretty much 2 in 1. 

There is a small smut scene which I've flagged further on for those who wish to skip.

************ 

There is something about pregnancy that requires a sense of great balance. As we speak, Harry and Louis are comfortably coming to terms with this ratio as Louis's pregnancy is bringing out the worst mood swings his ever experienced, while Harry is currently at a world record of controlling his self-tolerance. 

Harry now has to make a detour to the shop on his way home from work. He had only just pulled out of his workplace parking lot when he received a text from Louis complaining about his never-ending heartburn. As expected Harry suggests kindly that swallowing some reflux tablets may help. Louis responded with a sassy

" Don't you think if I had some, I would have! " 

That was enough to let Harry know that Lou has most likely had an unpleasant day. He wants to call him to check in before he drives off again but he chickens out taking the easier option of texting so as to not have to physically hear the sassiness. It's not that Harry is sick of hearing Louis complain, quite the opposite. He's just sad that he can't help him with a lot of it. 

To Louis : 
" Milk, I've heard that can help" 

From Louis :
" I literally have a mouthful left and I need that for my morning cup of tea" 

Harry doesn't reply after that he knows there's no use. He smiles to himself and drives to the closest shop. Louis had moved a lot of his stuff back in next door today with the help of Luke and Niall. 

Lexi had left the house early this morning to go and stay at her mum's house for the weekend, which Harry agreed was for the best. After their confronting discussion, they both need a little breathing space to let it all sink in that their marriage is now over. When she returns Sunday night Harry will tell her about Louis moving back in. He will, he's promised himself. His absolutely shit scared about her reaction but there's no getting out of it now, Louis is already back where he belongs. Harry thanks the gods above that Lexi wasn't home to see it. 

Seeing lights on inside Louis's house as Harry pulls into his driveway, ignites a warmth throughout him. Opening the car door Harry fumbles around grabbing his phone, keys and his paper shopping bag. Upon reaching the front door Harry pauses. Does he ring the doorbell or use his key? He smirks to himself as he places the key into the lock turning it until he hears it click open. 

As as soon as he pushes open the door, his nose is blessed with the aroma of something cooking from the oven. If his smelling senses are anything to go by his guessing it's chicken. Walking quietly down the hallway, he turns into the kitchen where he is met with a dancing Louis. There is light music radiating from his laptop that is placed on the kitchen island bench. Louis has yet to notice him as he's faced in the opposite direction peeling some potatoes, his hips swaying as he gently moves in sync with the music.

Harry enjoys the view. He finds himself staring a little longer than needed as he realises the sight in front of him is serene. Everything he has ever craved and wanted in life is before him and his having trouble believing what he is seeing. A house, his best mate, his lover, his soulmate, his baby....his home.  Harry is happy truly happy for once and he is using every inch of his well-being not to cry. Tears of happiness that is.

" Honey I'm home" Harry chuckles loudly, enough for Louis to hear but not enough to jump scare him. Louis spins around smiling with his hand placed on his chest. So maybe it scared him a little.

" Jesus Christ Harry!! " 

Louis lowers the knife down onto the chopping board and instantly approaches Harry connecting their lips for a welcome home kiss. 
It's nice and slow and Harry......well... he could get used to this. 

When Louis pulls back Harry takes a split second to once again memorise this scene because in this moment, the pair have never been this domesticated before and both Harry and Louis can not wipe the contentment off their faces. Harry hands the bag to Louis.

" Here, tablets for the heartburn and milk for the fridge." 

Louis snatches the tablets from Harry's hand incredibly fast not wasting any time. He doesn't want to even chance it reappearing, so he opens the milk and guzzles it down straight out of the container as Harry who is wide-eyed, watches on as he tries not to laugh. 

" Lou just think about it this way, it means our little girl has lots of hair. Well that's what I read somewhere anyway" 

Louis attaches the lid placing the milk in the fridge with a smirk on his face. 

" No Harry because if your theory is correct then the amount of heartburn I've had means our little 'girl' is probably ' Chewbacca'  " 

And with that comment, Harry can't contain himself from laughing any longer.

" Yep it's real funny isn't Harold, go ahead keep on laughing, keep on laughing!!" 

" what are you cooking? It smells delicious by the way."

Louis opens the oven door allowing the smell to accumulate the room. 

" It's just some chicken wrapped in parma ham that is stuffed with some mozzarella. You know I can't cook but I saw this recipe today and I dunno, I kind of just wanted to try and do something special for you. I hope you are bloody hungry H, I better not have slaved and stressed over this for nothing." Louis laughs as Harry pulls him closer to nibble his neck. 

" I'm hungry for you." 

Louis's eyes widen and smirks at Harry's failed attempt to flirt. 

" Go up and shower will ya and also I will let you know that -"

* Louis stands tall to whisper into Harry's ear * 

" I too am very hungry for you. Very very very hungry. So much so that, the cheesecake I brought over there, is not going to be your only desert" 

Harry feels himself instantly harden as his face flusters. Harry becomes warm, his very very warm. To be fair both men are extremely eager for some bedroom antics. They haven't pleased each other in months and the sexual tension between them just keeps on increasing with every passing second. 

With each step up the stairs, Harry grins because when the words left Louis's lips about showering, he realized that this place, is where he now feels comfortable..... Safe. 

When Louis had suggested moving in Harry was all for it. After his talk with Lexi, he informed Louis that he will try and balance life between the two houses, at least until the babies are a few months old and then his all Louis's. 

Louis was ok with Harry's plan. After all, he wanted Harry to step up for Lexi and his other daughter which he is doing and Louis has never been prouder of him. 

*************

Dinner went by quickly and like it has been for years the boys laughed and joked around, the conversation flowing freely and easy. All was seemingly going smooth. Too smooth.

As late as it had become both their eyes were becoming heavy. It had been a busy day for them both. When Louis suggested it was time for bed, the air had suddenly become a little thick. Even though they had agreed to move things forward with their relationship they haven't shared a bed or touched each other in months. 

It kind of explains the nervousness that Harry feels when entering Louis's room, evidently his room now too. Louis can sense what's happening because he too is feeling the same way. His heart is racing as he watches Harry remove his pants. Fuck he had forgotten in the short amount of time apart how good and fit he truly is. He can't seem to take his eyes off of him as he skims over his entire body studying him as though he hadn't seen him before. 

Louis has yet to remove anything other than his pants. Not only is he a tad busy with perving but he feels a slight bit embarrassed by his weight gain and heavy stomach. 

" Toothbrushes are in the bathroom mirror. " 
Louis states with a smile hoping he will take the bait, to which he does.

Louis uses the opportunity to undress and climb into bed pulling up the large thick white duvet. He feels stupid about it. He knows Harry wouldn't care about his few extra pounds, it's just his own stupid insecurities eating away at him, especially now after remembering how gorgeous Harry looks. 

When Harry slides into bed after flicking off the light there's a moment of quietness. It's not so much awkward but more the sense of calm; of blissfulness. It's everything they have both been yearning for and now the time has finally arrived there's nothing but tingles and butterflies swarming throughout the sheets. Both men laying still, smiles consuming their faces as they lie in the dark debating within themselves as to what to do next. Louis presses his lips together daring to be brave enough to break the silence. 

" Haz, I'm wholeheartedly grateful for everything you have done for me, with this house. It's without a doubt something I'm so appreciative of and I'm 100% indebted to you." 

Harry rolls over from his back to face Louis, who like a mirror copies his actions. Placing his arm around his waist he leans over planting a kiss to Louis's nose. He had aimed for his cheek but his judgment was slightly misplaced due to the darkness.

" You owe me nothing, Lou. You gave me a baby, I gave you a home. In all honestly, I think I got the better deal so it's me who should be thanking you."

It's now that Louis feels Harry's hand slowly moving across his belly that is clearly keeping them apart. Louis has noticed that every time Harry touches his belly, their daughter starts to move rapidly. It may kill his ribs but it melts his heart. 

" Whoah. She's really having fun in there, isn't she! " Harry jokes which makes Louis laugh. 

" I swear to you Harry no word of a lie, she's only this overactive whenever you touch her or she hears your voice."

Louis feels Harry shift a little down the bed and without meaning to lets out a small gasp at the unexpected action. He feels Harry's lips pressed to his belly as Harry for the first time speaks aloud to their eagerly awaited little girl. 

" I cannot wait to meet you. You have no idea how much I love you already." 

There was more Harry wanted to say but his lips were met with a little foot or hand to the mouth rather hard. Louis didn't hold back on the laugh at Harry jumping back from the feeling. 

" She hates me, doesn't she. She literally just smacked me in the mouth, telling me to shut up already!" 

Harry maneuvers back up towards Louis aligning their faces.

" I'm so sorry I took so long to tell you about her Harry." 

Harry could understand by Louis's tone that he was genuinely upset. Using his hand he lifts up his chin to caress his cheek. 

" It's ok Lou, I can't imagine how shocked and scared you must have felt dealing with all that on your own... I'm sorry I wasn't there to comfort you." 

Louis grabs hold of Harry's hand squeezing it tightly. He feels like shit. He had quite often thought about how he would have addressed things differently in the past if given the chance again and not telling Harry about his pregnancy is what he regrets the most.

Harry uses the silence to redirect the conversation back to their baby. 

" Have you thought of any names yet?" 

Louis rubs his hand up and down Harry's arm as he thinks. 

" I've had a couple of ideas but no, not really. What about you?" 

Harry sits up onto his elbow excitedly as he starts to rush out names. 

" I have heaps of ideas, what about Olive? Gertrude? Bessie? Alice? Dorothy? " Harry lets out a gasp " No I got it...Harriet!! Harry and his little Harriet. " 

Louis slaps Harry across the chest playfully as he bursts out laughing. 

" My God Harry you better be fucking joking. You do realise we are in 2022, not 1920 right?" 

" Heyyyy" Harry protests as he continues to chuckle. 

" Well do you have anything better?" Harry asks. 

" I do actually. " 

Louis whispers into Harry's ear. 

" That's perfect Lou."

************ 

Tonight has been amazing. They have had laughs over a nice meal together, Louis has moved back in and looks beautiful as he always does, so Harry goes forward with what he's been itching for all night. He connects their lips. 

Feeling the softness and re-living the delicious taste of his mouth creates a sensation throughout him that he can't hold back any longer. His hands travel down Louis's body to palm Louis region. Louis moans like Harry has never witnessed before almost bringing himself undone in the process. 

Neither Harry nor Louis have had proper sex in months. The amount of sexual tension is evident in the room. Louis whose hormones are going crazy has been sexually frustrated for a long time. The only perk of being pregnant so far is that of feeling horny 24/7. 

He had gotten himself off a couple of times while staying at Lukes but that soon stopped when one night a very drunken Luke offered a sexually frustrated Louis a head job to which Louis accepted. It meant nothing and Louis and Luke agreed to never mention it again. It's a secret that Louis will take to the grave because now he has Harry he doesn't want to lose him at any cost.

Louis knows he isn't going to last long whichever way this pans out. Harry is currently sucking into Louis's neck.

" This feels so good Haz"

⛔ Slight Smut Warning

Harry lowers himself down towards the bottom of the bed, removing Louis's boxers allowing him to bend up his knees, carefully spreading them apart. He leans forward wrapping his hand around Louis's hardened length. He pumps quickly a couple of times, his pre cum already soaking everywhere. 

" Fucking hell babe, you are so wet for me." 

Harry's cock twitches and is eagerly awaiting an exit from his tight boxers.  Harry takes Louis fully into his mouth. My God how he has missed him so much. From the way Louis's back arches when he gets so sensitive, to the salty but sweet taste of his liquid that is leaking down his throbbing cock, Harry has missed it all. 

Slowly removing his cock from his lips, he collects the pre-cum holding it inside his mouth. Opening his lips he lets it messily fall upon his two fingers. Kissing his thighs produces a whimper out of Louis that sounds terribly sinful and Harry is nearly ready to combust from just hearing his moans alone. 

He pulls apart his ass cheeks licking a long stripe from his entrance up to his balls. He decides to enter both the index and middle finger, which is heavily lubricated into Louis at once, knowing he thrives off the initial stretch and burn. He knows he made the correct decision when Louis tilts his hips up off the bed begging for more. Inserting his fingers two knuckles deep, he again returns to Louis's cock running his tongue from his base up to his tip, swirling his tongue around delicately before swallowing him whole. 

Harry starts to move his fingers in a small back and forth motion and hits his prostate immediately. Not expecting it so soon, Harry is surprised when he hears Louis muster out a desperate cry; 

" Oh fuck babe...fuck oh no..." 
Quickly followed by the heat of his ejaculation squirting down his throat. 

Louis is morbidly horrified. He is totally embarrassed and ashamed of himself that he has come so soon. There's enough light in the room that Harry can see that Louis has covered his face with his hands. 

" Hey don't do that, it's ok Lou. " 

Harry moves back up towards him kissing his torso along the way. 

" That was fucking embarrassing Harry!! " 

" No, what it was, was incredibly sexy." 

Louis rolls away from Harry onto his side with Harry immediately cuddling up to his back. Louis can feel Harry's cock pressed to his ass completely forgetting that Harry needed his own  release. Louis grinds back onto him slowly but seductively circling his hips, to fully let Harry understand what he's implying. 

Harry plants a few brisk kisses to Louis's back while he pulls down his own boxers. Lifting Louis's leg slightly to allow extra room, he aligns himself with Louis's hole and gently penetrates into him. Moving gradually Harry has never felt this intimate with anyone. 

Using one hand to keep Louis's cheeks apart as he slowly rolls in and out of him, Harry realises that Louis is the one. The one and only person he ever wants to do this with for the rest of his life. 

Louis reaches his arm back holding Harry in deeper when he noticed Harry's panting had increased. He knows he's getting close and Louis also isn't wanting this to be over but he couldn't stop the words escaping from his mouth, knowing full well that Harry would crumble. 

" fill me up, daddy "

" Fuccck Lou" 

Two more thrusts and Harry bottoms out holding tightly onto Louis's hips as he spills his load inside of him. Pulling out gently, the cum leaks down Louis's leg initiating a 
' mission accomplished ' smirk from Louis. 

⛔ End of Smut ⛔

Harry exits the bed to collect a towel to clean up their mess but finds Louis already rolling out of bed when he returns. 

" Gotta pee, this girl loves playing trampoline on my bladder. " he laughs. 

Louis heads off into the bathroom while Harry lays on the bed pondering. 

Intimacy in a relationship is not just physical. Intimacy is not just who you let touch you, it's about who you find yourself texting at all hours of the night about your fears and your dreams. It's about giving your full attention to someone while many others are already fighting for it. He comes to the conclusion that intimacy is that one person who is always stuck in the back of your mind no matter how busy or distracted you are. 

Louis is pure intimacy. 

*************

Louis is woken by the awful sound of his phone ringing. Wiping his eyes quickly he reaches out his arm looking at the screen. 

" Hey, Barry. What can I do for you so early on this Saturday morning?" 

Louis listens to the words from his publisher carefully along with a few hums of agreement before finally answering. 

" Yes, the first chapter is complete...Yep, I can do that. I will email it over this afternoon." 

Louis places the phone back on the bedside table when he finishes the call. He is nervous about how Barry may react to his new book. Well, he wanted something different, so that's what he's getting. 

" Are you hungr-" 

Louis stops mid-sentence when he notices the space beside him is empty. 

" Harry?" Louis calls as he walks downstairs in hopes of finding him. He doesn't see Harry but he spots a note on the kitchen table. 

'
 

Had to go into work for a couple of hours, didn't want to wake you, hopefully, I won't be too long. Miss you already X '

Louis can not believe how empty the house feels without Harry in it. He walks around opening up the fridge. For some reason, he feels super hungry today. Staring blankly at the contents he decides cereal may be the easier option. 

Harry left the house at 8 am. It's now just past 11.40 am and he is almost finished and ready to return to Louis. He doesn't have to go far, he is only next door at his house. He doesn't know why he felt the need to hide the car in the garage and lie about where he was. He had promised Lexi to start their daughter's nursery and for some reason, he found it weird and heartbreaking to confess what it was he was truly doing. Nothing about this whole situation felt right. He doesn't want to hurt Louis with his other daughter, in the same respect he wants to hold his promise to Lexi about their own daughter. 

Looking around the room he has completed, he is semi-happy with what he has accomplished. He can't help but shake the feeling that he is indeed more excited about one baby more than the other and it's really starting to weigh him down. 

He knows it's because being with Louis so closely he is physically more connected to their daughter as he constantly feels her kicks and speaks to her. None of that happens with Lexi and he fears he isn't bonding with that baby yet and the guilt is growing stronger every single day. He keeps reminding himself that it will all change once she is here. When he can hold her in his arms, he will connect better. He will Love her, he knows he will.

*************

Walking back into the house to find Louis, Harry is met with a sight he didn't expect to see.

The kitchen bench is covered in spilt cereal surrounded by chopped-up vegetables and food packaging. It's a total mess. The room looks like a bomb has struck it in the short few hours he had been gone. When he eventually lays his eyes on Louis he discovers that he is trying to make a sandwich. The problem here is that he doesn't look very happy at all. Harry can tell he must address this carefully. 

" Umm babe, what happened in here?" 

The look Louis generates sends shivers down Harry's spine. No matter how scary he may look when his angry Harry still only sees a cute little kitten. 

" Don't fucking ask......" 

Harry threw his arms up in defeat and didn't plan on taking it further but Louis had other ideas. 

" YOUR daughter has been hurting me in all ways shapes and forms to start with" 

Harry picks up on the emphasis of the word YOUR. He makes a mental reminder that it's clear that whenever their daughter misbehaves later on in life, she will be referred to as  Harry's daughter only.  It makes Harry internally laugh.

" As you can see, I've knocked over the cereal. Not one packet Harry but two! And this fucking knife is so dam blunt it won't even cut through the Tomato. " 

Harry approaches cautiously biting his lip hard trying his best to contain the outpour of laughter that his struggling to refrain. He reaches out taking the knife out of his hands and turning it around the right way. 

" Oh for fuck sakes!!!! " 

Harry erupts into a pit of laughter expecting Louis to do the same but he doesn't. With his hand on his lower back, he sinks down into the chair and starts crying. 

" Oh shit, I'm sorry Lou what's wrong. I was only messing about. " 

Louis doesn't respond just sobs harder and for once Harry doesn't have a clue what to do. He instinctively lowers himself down pulling him in close. 

" I just wanted a goddam fucking sandwich " Louis cries. 

Harry knows he shouldn't be internally laughing but he can't seem to help it. 

" Look at me. It's all ok. Look how about we go out and get something to eat and I will clear all this up when we return yeah?" 

Louis wipes his face feeling like a fucking idiot. He can't believe he just had a breakdown over a stupid sandwich.

" I stubbed my toe too" 

" Aww, baby I'm sorry." 

" and I dropped my camera pulling it out of the closest" 

" Oh shit! That was expensive that one."

" Yes, I am very aware thank you. And then to top it off I spilt hot wax everywhere and before you ask, no I'm not explaining how or why I needed the wax" 

Harry smirks

" Poor Lou. You really did have a bad day huh. " 

Harry laughs along with Louis as they head upstairs to change their clothes. 

" What do you feel like? Pizza? Salad? We could do a pub meal or - "

" Peanut butter croissants," Louis says firmly as he interrupts. 

Harry screws up his face. 

" Ok bakery it is then. " 

************

Watching Louis stuff his face with croissants is making Harry gag. On the contrary, Harry loves croissants just.....not smothered in peanut butter. It looks disgusting and smells even worse and Louis is downing one after another like there's no tomorrow. 

" You sure you don't want one Haz, you have no idea what you are missing out on. " 

Harry shakes his head no as Louis giggles. Harry is just happy that Louis is back to being himself. 

***********

The next day flies by so quickly. It's late Sunday afternoon and Harry hears a scream come from the kitchen. It appears Louis has sliced his finger while opening a metal tin. Looking around the kitchen Harry is once again met with the sight of food everywhere.

" What are you doing in here?" 

" Eating my feelings Harry that's what and they were tasting great until this happened." 

Louis raises his hand revealing the cut. 

There's blood all over the counter and it looks worse than it really is but Harry still manages to panic. He grabs a cloth wrapping his finger tightly. 

" Holy shit Lou, do you have a first aid kit here yet?"

Louis shakes his head no. 

" Follow me. " 

They both exit out Louis's front door both of them not hearing Harry's phone ringing from the bedroom upstairs, missing Lexi's call. 

Ten minutes later they return to Louis's house where Louis is all cleaned up with a bandaid. Louis is disappointed Harry refused to wear a nurse's outfit but he did promise it for another day. 

" Hey I know it's last-minute but I signed up for a pregnancy class tonight. They were originally closed but I received an email this morning stating they were in fact opening so I went ahead and made a booking. Would you like to attend with me?" Louis asks shyly. 

" Of course. Yes." Harry replies too eagerly. 

When the time finally arrives for them to leave, Harry who had fixed his hair and doused himself in deodorant picked up his phone sliding it into his back jean pocket failing to look at the screen. 

It only takes 15 minutes to arrive at the hall where the classes are being held. There are also a lot more people than Louis had expected as they both become aware of how many cars are in the parking lot. The first thing Louis notices is that they are all women that he can see entering the building. It makes him slightly uncomfortable. 

" You ready?" Harry asks as Louis unclips his belt opening his door. It's only then he checks his phone for the first time noticing the 4 missed calls from Lexi. He doesn't want to mess this night up for Louis so he decides that Lexi can wait. He will call her later tonight when they leave. She was due to return tonight so she's probably just checking whether he is going to be 'home' or not. 

Walking into the establishment Louis immediately wants to turn around and leave. Pregnant women everywhere. Not one man in sight. He feels out of place and for some reason incredibly embarrassed. The lady running the sessions picks up on Louis's insecurity immediately making herself known to him. 

" Hello there. My name is Tammy I will be running the session tonight, I am so glad to meet you....." 

Louis extends his hand out to accept her handshake. 

" Louis. Louis Tomlinson." 

" and you, I assume are the husband?" 

Harry smiles back at her while flicking a smirk towards Louis.

' Not yet 
' 
he thinks to himself before eventually answering. 

" No,  I mean... Im the boyfriend, not the husband. Harry. My name is Harry styles." 

" My apologies. Well, it's nice to have you guys here. Please come on in. Make yourself comfortable. Please take a seat anywhere around the circle. Most people are here now so we will commence shortly." 

Louis and Harry smile and walk in the direction she had shown. There's only a few seats left.  

" What is the point of these lessons anyway?" Harry inquires genuinely interested. 

"  I mean, a lot of it will be about how to handle the labour, obviously that doesn't apply to me since I'm having a C- section but it's not just that though, these classes will also focus on what to expect once the baby is born with tips on pretty much how to survive the first few weeks." 

Harry smiles as Louis takes his hand in his. The seats are sat in a semi circle and Harry for some reason is focused in on all the posters hung around the walls as Louis sits nervously picking at his fingernails. 

Tammy starts to introduce herself as the room becomes quiet. She's just starting to explain what's on tonights agenda when she stops due to the door being opened, a last minute expectant mother rushing through the door, Louis and Harry can only assume as they don't bother turning around not wanting to add to any more embarrassment she may be experiencing.  

Louis watches Tammy smile to whom ever it is, her heels clicking loudly against the tiled floor, followed by the scrap of the chair. 

" You are just in time. My name is Tammy welcome. Is it just you or are we waiting on your husband perhaps?" 

" Oh sorry no it's just me, my husband is already here by the looks of things." 

Harry and Louis snap their heads quickly in the direction of Lexi's voice. Lexi looks mad and poor Tammy is completely confused. 

" Please continue, " Lexi says as she plonks her handbag beside her feet her glare seething towards Harry. Louis wants to leave immediately. He feels so uncomfortable. He hates that Lexi has yet once again, something to be mad at him about. Louis pulls his hand out from Harry's earning a slight frown but it soon drops when Harry understands. 

The next 30 minutes is pretty much spent just sitting back and listening. A few brochures have been passed around and even though Louis feels guilty with Lexi near by, he is still glad he came, he has learnt a lot.

Tammy suddenly asks for the couples to sit on the floor as she plans to show and explain how  spouses and partners can help with pregnancy back pain. Harry helps Louis to the floor taking his seat slightly behind him somewhat in a protective manner. 

Louis can't help it. His eyes drift over to Lexi who is sitting alone. Her eyes are zoned in on the space in front of her. You don't need to be a rocket scientist to realise she's embarrassed. She has no -one and she's upset about it. She's trying to hide it the best she can by lifting her head and smiling to Tammy who has now just realised the awkward position she put Lexi in. 

Louis can't stand it any longer. There's guilt flowing through him. If it wasn't for him cheating and fucking Harry, Lexi would have her husband beside her right now. It's getting too much for him to bear. He feels his leg start to bounce a little at his own nerves. He looks back to Harry. He doesn't have to say a word. Just by the look Harry already understands what Louis wants. So Harry does. He leans forward kissing Louis's temple as he stands up. The only thing Louis hates at this moment is the amount of eyes watching his every move.

Lexi watches Harry sit down next to her while Harry's eyes are fixated on Louis, who mouths a 'thank you' to him. 

It's only 25 minutes later when the session concludes. When Harry darts off to the use the toilet, Tammy advises all the guests to help themselves to the buffet of light refreshments. As much as Louis is excited to leave, the chocolate coated strawberries and coconut slice was too good to pass up. He grabs a plate making sure to fill it. He's hungry and it's free so he has no regrets about it.

He is about to turn around when he catches sight of Lexi right beside him out of his peripheral vision. She doesn't look his way and Louis doesn't move either. For some reason they both come to a still. Louis truly has no idea what he should do. He waits a few seconds and decides that just keeping quiet is the better option but Lexi thought otherwise. Her voice is soft and quiet. There is no animosity in her tone. 

" Thank you. " 

It's then Louis looks at her while Lexi connects eyes. He nods and smiles before she walks away. It may not have been much, a small step if you like but it was a start at least.

*************

Harry decides to stay at ' His' house tonight. He really hopes Lexi is still awake as he opens the front door. Walking up the stairs he can hear movement coming from her room. He knocks on the door and enters after she yells out ' come in ' 

Lexi walks out of the bathroom in a silk robe and Harry is shocked to discover how big Lexi's stomach has become. He hadn't taken notice in a while and it has thrown him a little at the sudden growth. 

" You never answered me today " Lexi starts, bringing Harry out of his daze.

Harry finally removes his eyes from her belly, opting to look around the room. It feels foreign being back in there. For what was once his sanctuary is now a memory. 

" Yeah ah sorry about that. Louis had cut himself and I was busy applying first aid. I did mean to call back it just slipped my mind. " 

Lexi doesn't mean to sound sarcastic but it definitely comes out that way. 

" oh I see and what if I had 
slipped
 out a baby" 

" Lex please. I apologise it was a legitimate mistake, I promise it won't happen again. I will make sure to answer you ok" Harry takes a deep breath attempting to keep his cool. The last thing he wants is to fight with her again. " What were you calling for anyway? " 

" To let you know about tonights class. I didn't  receive the email til late, just thought I'd invite you but you and Louis...." 

Lexi stops talking and the room has become silent at the mention of his name. It's a hard road for Lexi who had agreed to try and accept Louis in hopes of obtaining a mutual decision to ' get along' for the sake of Harry and his daughters. 

Lexi lowers herself down onto the bed. She scrunches her nose a little clearly in pain. 

" What's wrong?" He asks concerned. 

" Nothing it's just she keeps moving or turning around. I'm getting jabbed all over. " 

Harry looks to her belly which he can see is moving about. 

" Do you mind?" 

Lexi nods only as she pulls herself up against the bed head pulling a couple of pillows behind her back. 

Harry places his hand down still on her belly. He feels a good kick, and another and another. 

" Always so active when you are around." 

Harry internally scoffs, smuggly he will admit as his heard this once before. He can't help the smile that forms, because his just had a tiny bit of hope restored within himself that BOTH his daughters will be loved and cherished equally just like they should be.

" There's lights on next door." 

Harry's smile diminishes on the spot. 

" Yeah....um about that....we need to talk." 

" What do you mean, why are you looking like that?" 

" Like what?" 

" I know that look Harry, you are scared, what's wrong?" 

Harry can feel droplets of sweat forming across his forehead. It's not a lie, he is scared in fact, his fucking petrified. There's no time like the present. 

" Louis. " the words clumsily stagger out of his mouth. 

" Louis?? what does he have to do with the new neighbour?" 

Harry clears his throat. He tries not to panic but his sure his life had just flashed before his eyes, so that can't be a good sign right? 

" Louis IS the new neighbour." 

There is a darkness that falls upon Lexi's eyes and he hasn't missed the way she is clinging on tightly to the blanket.  

" You better be fucking joking Harry how is that even possible? " 

Shit, and there it is. The question he was dreading because how does he explain this. How does he explain to his ' Wife' that he used their entire savings and pulled a few other strings to buy his ' boyfriends' home. 

" Harryyy?" Lexi drags out,  impatient that his taking too long to respond. 

Standing up backing towards the door in order to feel some what safer he bites his thumb nail. 

" Before I tell you, I want to let you know the nursery is done. I think you are going to love it. I used all the colours you- " 

" Harry!!!" Lexi shouts, annoyed at his attempt of stalling. 

"  ok ok...well............." 

************

A/N 

Please be aware next chapter there will be a time jump of a few months. This will bring both Lexi and Louis nearly to full term. I have decided there will be about 5 chapters left give or take depending on which way I decide to waver the ending. I just don't want to drag the story out any longer than needed boring you guys in the process. Hahaha 

Thank you all so much for the 5k reads already. It's truly blown me away with the amount of support. You are all amazing. Xxx 

♡♡♡

# Chapter 22 - Hospital Rush

~A few months later ~

Lexi = 36 weeks 

Louis = 38 weeks

When you are tired, you become over whelmed. Being over whelmed causes you to over think. Over thinking creates a mess inside your mind, and despite all this, Harry smiles through it all because he refuses to be defeated by his current complicated life circumstances. But Harry is tired of feeling stronger than he feels. He knows what is coming in life will be better than what has been put behind him. 
Harry has faith in the future.

Harry just wants to sleep. For the last couple of months he has tried his hardest to Keep both Louis and Lexi comfortable, calm and healthy. He has been back and forth between the two houses continuously. 

Well that was up until a few weeks back. 

Harry and Louis have hardly spoken in the last few weeks. Harry got scared after Lexi encountered a problem with her pregnancy. Harry jumped to Lexi's aid and well, Louis found that Harry only made a house call every so often to visit him quickly, mainly checking in via texts. 

The last couple of months has truly been a roller coaster for Lexi. After finding out about Harry buying the house next door she found it extremely difficult to be herself. After initally having a full blown argument followed by giving Harry the silent treatment for weeks, Lexi found herself in the emergency room after she unexpectantly started bleeding. No matter how much she wanted to call Harry her stubbornness wouldn't allow it.

The doctor performed a scan to rule out placenta previa and placenta abruption and all was well. It turns out her uterus walls had started to thin a little. Dr Payne had assured her it was not too serious but advised bed rest until delivery. As embarrassing as it was she had confessed to the doctor regarding the stress she had been under and asked if the bleeding was caused by her own anxiety and run down emotions. Liam had reassured her it wasn't her fault and advised her to relax the best she can as any unnecessary stress is not healthy.

When Lexi had returned home to find Harry walking into next doors, Harry approached her asking where she had been. Lexi who automatically noticed Harry's concern took it upon herself to tell him all about the bleeding and bedrest. Of course Harry panicked and immediately vowed to come back to look after her. Lexi had initially refused. The two of them were on talking terms but only because they had to be. 

It only took a couple of days before Lexi started to play it up a little as she realised Harry was pretty much at her beck and call. 

There's a part of Harry that is blaming himself for the bleeding. Once Lexi explained what the doctor had said, he still couldn't shake off the thought that his and her arguing was affecting his unborn daughter. 

Not being able to decide on anything to watch on the TV, Harry slowly stands up off the couch tilting his head side to side stretching out his neck listening to it crack a couple of times, before deciding it was time for bed. He worked back late again today trying to jam in as much over time as possible before his children are brought into the world. 

He nearly makes it past Lexi's room un-noticed before she calls out. 

" Any chance you could do me a favour?" 

" Depends. I'm on my way to bed. What is it?" 

" I really feel like some cheesecake." 

Harry knows the shop not too far down the road that is open all night has it available but he really just can't be fucked. It's simple as that. Looking towards his watch he makes the snap decision. 

" Sorry , it 9.40 I've had a big day I'm off to bed." 

" Ok." 

He can hear her disappointment but he can hear his bed calling more. 

It seems Louis could see right through the way Lexi was behaving. When Harry filled him in on everything that keeps happening between them, every time he suggested to Harry that she was using it all to her advantage Harry would jump to defend her and for some reason he was completely oblivious to it all. 

Louis couldn't help but keep tapping into that niggly feeling in the back of his mind, that paranoia, that Harry will realise his mistake and run back to Lexi. To settle his thoughts he found himself having a few lunch dates with Niall and matilda.

Spending time with a little baby was allowing Louis to get in a bit of first hand practise of what's to soon come. It also however caused a tad of anxiety realising how much work a small human being demands. Holding and playing about with matilda has boosted Louis confidence in parenthood, an impending part of his future that he was once terrified of, he is now looking forward to the most. 

If Louis has a calender in his room that he is marking off the days with little crosses as he counts down to meet his baby girl, then no -one really needs to know. 

************

Some days you will feel like the ocean, all free and flowing and some days.... you will just feel like your drowning in it. Today is one of those days. Harry is missing Louis. He knows looking after Lexi has been the right thing to do but the time apart from him has dragged out the days.

Although Harry is staying in the same house as Lexi he feels more alone than he ever has. He misses Louis tremendously and tomorrow he is going to make it all change. He needs to see him and spend some quality time. It won't be long now before their daughter arrives so making the most of their remaining time alone is now itched onto Harry's top priority of things to do.

He knows Louis is OK. He has been spending time with Niall and Luke while Harry has been at work. He is glad he has other friends but Harry still wishes he could somehow pull more hours out of the day.

He lays back onto his pillow, the night lamp illuminating the room as he stares to the roof struggling to keep his eyes open. It's only 8pm and yet all he wants to do is sleep. He has been so worn out over the last few months trying to keep the peace with both Lexi and Louis and trying to accommodate both pregnancies, that he has fully come to over exertion.

He shakes his head to himself as he wonders how the hell he's going to cope with 2 newborns when he can hardly handle 2 pregnant people. The amount of pre natal appointments and birthing classes, attending his daily work, along with pregnancy hormones spiraling from both Lexi and Louis, the moment Harry stretches out on the bed his body just wants to shut down. 

Switching off the lamp, He closes his eyes but all he can see is Louis Louis Louis. His lip slightly smirks as his mind invisions that perfect shade of blue, Those immaculate eyes and rounded belly, all before he is soon drawn into a very deep sleep. 

His not sure what it is exactly that wakes him up without warning. When he opens his eyes he can hear a dog barking in the faint distance noticing the room is still dark. He reaches for his phone the clock showing 2.33am. He can see there's a message from Louis but he opts to use the bathroom first before reading it. He may have only slept for 6 hours but to him it felt like 12. Sitting back down on the side of the bed, he now feels wide awake. The message from Louis was sent at 11pm.

To Harry : 
" How is Lexi? Hope all is well. I'm going to sleep. Missed seeing you today. Hope you had a great day at work. See you tomorrow? 😘 " 

There's nothing upsetting about the message but it somehow makes Harry feel un easy. He knows Lou well enough to understand the hidden message. Louis needs more from Harry and Harry feels nothing but guilt. He starts to reply until he remembers the time. He closes it off and lays back into bed drawing the covers. He opens instagram and sees Louis is 'online' while he is debating wether to text, Louis has already beaten him to it. 

" Hey. What are you doing awake?" 

" I was going to ask you the same thing. " 

" I'm awake because of peanut crossiants, what is your excuse?" 

Harry lets a small giggle escape. 

" croissants at this hour? " 

" Do not judge me Harold!!! what this baby wants I provide..Well ..I'm trying too at least. I have croissants but I'm out of peanut butter. I just spent 17 minutes scouring the entire kitchen but I definitely finished off the jars I had yesterday. She's kicking like crazy and I'm so tired. If only I had some she would settle but oh well....anyway you never said what you are doing awake. " 

Harry gets up collecting his shirt from the ground beside him. Closing his bedroom door quietly he tip toes down the stairs opening up his own kitchen cupboards in search for peanut butter, unfortunately he is unsuccessful. 

He grabs his jacket and his keys and heads towards the exit. 

*************

Lexi is startled when she hears the front door open. After all it is 3am. It's safe to say she was scared as she peered down the hallway. She relaxed when she saw Harry taking off his coat. 

" Harry! What are you doing? You just scared me half to death." 

Taking a deep breath Harry walks slowly along the hallway joining her in the kitchen.

" Sorry about that. What are you doing up, are you ok?" 

Lexi places one hand on her belly while wiping her mouth with the other. 

" Yeah I was just really thirsty. Um where were you?" 

Harry was hoping she wouldn't ask. 

" I had to go the 24/7 supermarket for some peanut butter that's all." he says nervously as he runs a hand through his hair. 

He walks over to the fridge clasping the water jug. He takes a whole mouth full before Lexi speaks again. 

" Where is it?" 

" Where's what ?" Harry queries. 

" The peanut butter. I could totally enjoy some of that right now." 

Lexi pauses as her eyes skim over Harry's empty hands. Her face drops as she realises. 

" Oh....I see ..." 

He can already tell she's saddened by it and it hurts him. He has tried and tried to keep both parties happy and he feels like shit because he knows what his done and why she's upset. He opens his mouth to apologise and explain but she's already turned around, the sound of her bare feet hitting the floor lightly as she makes her way towards the staircase. 

Harry sighs fishing out his phone that has just vibrated in his pocket. 

From Louis :
" Thankyou babe. Our daughter thanks you and me too I guess. Hahaha. Goodnight Xxx" 

He smiles before typing out his response and returning it to his back pocket. 

To Louis : 
" You are welcome. See you tomorrow.
I promise!! Like I said earlier anything for you my love. Now go to sleep and get some rest. X "

**************

" Harry come here." 

Lexi is sat at the kitchen table. Only moments ago she ended a lengthy phone call with her parents. Harry knows where this conversation is about to go because he sat in the living room eavesdropping on their call. 

" What's up?" 

" So mum and dad just asked about names for bubba. What do you think. There's a name I really like but what about you, surely you must have some names you like." 

Harry smiles gently. 

" I'm happy with what ever you decide. " He turns away with the intention of busying himself with the dishes. The action is soon interrupted with Lexi's voice. 

" Do you not want any say in our daughters name? Is she not that important to you or just not the favourite? not the one worth worrying about." 

All Harry feels like doing is ripping her fucking head off. There's no words left in the dictionary to try and explain how hard he is finding trying to refrain from bursting out into a fit of rage. He doesn't want that added stress put onto the baby. He can't win with her. His doomed if he does and doomed if he doesn't, no matter what he does.

With clenched fists by his sides he keeps his mouth closed and enters out into his back yard for a smoke in the hopes of calming down. He knows it's her hormones getting the better of her as Louis too has been acting the same way. 

When Lexi first had her bleeding Harry took the opportunity one night to address their lives once again now that they had both had time to think and calm down. Harry explained his history and sexuality to Lexi in full detail and suprisingly she reassured Harry that she accepted his decision about Louis even though it still hurt her deeply. She had even asked how his pregnancy was going and suggested a dinner night which nearly made Harry collapse with shock. 

So there were good and bad days, some with more highs than Low's but Harry is definitely looking forward to the day these pregnancies end in the hopes of having Lexi and Louis return to being themselves without the emotional rollercoaster of tears and tantrums.

**************

This week Lexi has begun experiencing the joys of Braxton hicks contractions. Louis had started them a couple of weeks ago but Lexi has only today started to feel them. Harry can tell by Lexi's reaction that she's getting nervous and scared about the impending delivery. 

The doctor's appointment was at 5.00pm today. Lexi made it the lastest she could to make sure Harry only had to leave work only a fraction earlier than normal. 

Liam is happy with the amount of bed rest Lexi has aquired. Her blood pressure was better than her previous visits. Lexi had just informed Liam about how the baby's movements had slowed down significantly. 

Liam can see how anxious she is and starts to explain how the kicks and constant turnings, slow down near the end of the third trimester due to lack of room and being in position for the birth. He heard Liam reassure her and promised to look over her just to put her mind at ease, when his phone started ringing. After digging into his pocket to pull it out of his jeans he notices the name.

Louis knew he was at the appointment so Harry found it weird he was calling. He apologised to both Liam and Lexi before excusing himself from the room ,much to Lexi's annoyed eyeroll. 

" Sorry guys I really need to take this call. " 

The moment he closed the office door he answered and was met with a frantic Louis. 

" Harry thank fuck. Where are you ?" 

" At the doctors with Lexi you knew this. What is wrong ?" 

Harry can hear that Louis's breathing has increased and instinctively Harry can tell he is pacing back and forth.

" Shit I'm so sorry I forgot I'm not thinking straight." 

" Louis calm down. Why is it you called love?" 

" Oh um I just wanted to know what it was Liam said to do if my water broke early before my scheduled C-section?" 

Relaxed as he was Harry thought for a quick second before replying. 

" Um I think he said that you would need to go to the hospital immediately. Why is everything ok?" 

It was then the realization struck.

"Has your fucking water broke?" 

Harry spoke louder than expected a sense of fear rolling off his words. There was no time for Louis to respond because Harry's eardrum was soon filled with a loud cry" 

" Ow ow ow ... Harry get me to the Hospital NOW !!!!" 

It didn't even register to him to inform Lexi he was leaving. The only worry he had right now was attending to Lou. Harry hasn't noticed the way his hands have started trembling along with the nauseous feeling he was now enduring in the pit of his stomach. 

It doesn't take him long to arrive home. Sprinting through the door the sight of Louis bent over the arm of the lounge room chair weeping in pain was enough for Harry to let the true depth of his anxiety take over. For a split second he freezes as it all hits him at once. 

Louis is going to have a baby. 
Now! 
He is going to become a dad really soon. 

Harry can't take his eyes away from Louis who is rocking back and forth trying to find a bit of relief from the contractions. 

" Harold you mother fucker snap the fuck out of it and help me!" 

Louis roars at Harry who instantly does as his told. He grabs the bags Louis has placed on the table and rushes them to the car. Louis slowly makes his way out to the driveway as Harry clings on to him trying to support him. 

Harry would like to confirm it was a quiet drive to the hospital but that unfortunately couldn't be further from the truth. After he called the hospital to let them know they were on the way, Louis's contractions were getting stronger. 

"Can you not drive any fucking faster Harry, you are not a God dam grandfather move it !" 

Harry looks at the dash in front of him sighting that he is already over the speed limit. He hates seeing Louis in pain. In retrospect he hasn't seen him in so much physical pain like this before. 

" Will you just answer that dam thing" 
Louis shouts. 

The entire trip to the hospital Harry's phone has consistently rang. He knows it's only Lexi asking where his disappeared too. He kinda forgot that leaving the way he did, left her no way of getting home.

He lets it go to voicemail again as he steers into the hospital parking Lot. Upon entering Louis is immediately placed into a wheelchair while Harry starts to fill out a form for the receptionist. Harry is asked to take a seat and told he will be taken to Louis's room once he is settled. 

Harry uses this time to open his phone. There's 8 missed calls and a voicemail. Ignoring the voicemail he types a quick sms instead. 

To Lexi: 
" I'm sorry, Louis is in labour. Call a taxi. I'm so sorry. " 

He doesn't recieve a reply. He can only assume that she's clearly annoyed.

Minutes later Harry is approached by a nurse in the waiting room. 

" Are you Harry?" 

Harry extends his hands to greet her. 

" Yes that's me. Can I see Louis now?"

" My name is Andrea. I will be his attending nurse during his stay. Ofcourse you can see him now. Please follow me." 

Along the way Andrea informs Harry that Louis is waiting to hear back from the surgeon's. Liam had been contacted but was currently busy. 

Opening the door to his room Louis was laid in bed curled to his side holding onto a mouth piece that was providing gas pain relief. He walked over quietly laying a hand to Louis lower back rubbing it slightly. 

" Haz ?" 

" Yeah it's me. " 

Louis seemed a little tired which is understandable considering he also didn't get much sleep last night either. He looks so sleepy and Harry just wishes he could trade places. 

" I'm so scared Harry. " 

Harry sits down on the bed behind his back leaning forward to hold Louis hand. 

" I'm right here darling. You have nothing to worry about. Not long and we see our little girl. "

Louis doesn't reply opting to squeeze Harry's hand as he inhales the gas once again. Harry doesn't mean the nervous banter to slip out his mouth but it does. 

" You actually in pain there Tomlinson or you just wanna try and get high ?" 

Louis tries to laugh and smiles just as Andrea the nurse walks in. 

" How you going there, is the gas enough relief? Would you like some water? " 

Andrea places the cup and jug onto the side table. 

" You will hopefully be brought down to theatre in about 10 minutes where they will prep you for delivery ok. You are going to be fine love. Doctor Payne has been paged and has arrived. He is currently down stairs in emergency with 2 other patients. He will pop into theatre when he gets the chance. " 

Louis nods his head to show his listening. As Andrea walks past Harry, she leans close as she softly speaks, in a way as to hide her words from Louis. 

" Doctor Payne requests to see you outside." 

Harry looks confused then nods agreeing. The moment she leaves the room, Harry leans forward using his hand to wipe Louis fringe out of his eyes. He plants a kiss to his forehead. 

" I will be back in 5 minutes Darling."

Louis swings his head around extremely fast completely panic stricken. 

" What. Where are you going. Please don't leave me please." 

Harry's heart wants to combust. His never seen Louis so vulnerable and it breaks his heart. 

" Only 5 minutes babe and I will be back. " 

He kisses him again and walks to the door, stopping to take another look as Louis rubs circles around his stomach as another contraction hits. He exhales a sigh before walking out and closing the door. 

15 minutes later Louis rolls around at the sound of the door opening but is quickly disappointed when he sees Andrea standing there with a small smile on her face. 

" Theatre is all ready for you. It's time to go Mr Tomlinson not long now and you shall hold your little one. " Her smile would normally be comforting but in this case it's simply not. 

Louis goes to sit up as he looks around the room. Harry isn't there. 

" Where's Harry ? I can't go without Harry. " 

Andrea gives a faint smile in return but stays firm in her position. 

" Please can you find Harry or wait just another 5 minutes PLEASE. " 

The sound of desperation in Louis voice makes Andrea turn and leave. Louis reaches for the phone and calls Harry. It goes straight to voicemail. He tries again and again and each time it's the same result. Voicemail. He sends a text asking where he his and to get his ass back to the room.

Louis heart is racing he can feel himself getting worked up and Harry right now can go fuck himself. 

" Where the fuck are you!!" He yells to himself in the room. It draws the attention of the people outside. His door opens and Liam is standing there. 

" Louis you really need to get to theatre now." 

Two men step around Liam and walk towards his bed pulling up the side railing preparing to exit the room. 

" Liam please. I need Harry. I can't do this without him. " 

Louis doesn't notice the concern forming across Liam's face. 

The bed starts to be moved out the door. Everyone is quiet besides Louis who is calling out for Harry as he looks around the corridors. 
Liam is the last to leave the room hanging back a little. 

From here, things move fast. One moment Louis is entering the theatre and the next he is getting a needle into his back. The spinal block epidural is needed for the C-Section. There are many doctors in the room all chatting away within themselves, preparing for the delivery. 

Louis is silent. He has turned off. He lays there still, his head to the side starring at the adjacent bench which is supporting a baby weighing machine. There's a single tear running down his cheek. 

An anaesthetist approaches his face asking him several questions. 

' Are you ok ?' 
' Can you feel this ?' 

Louis doesn't respond. He feels broken. He can't understand why Harry hasn't returned to him. He knew how scared he was. They had waited for this moment for so long. 

Liam notices Louis demeanour and walks over to him. He offers somewhat of a half smile. 

" Where is he Liam? Please just tell me. Please." 

Liam looks around the room for any listening ears. He makes a decision that goes against his medical judgment and confidentiality. He can't stand seeing Louis in so much despair when this should be a time of joy. He checks again and leans close to his ear. 

" His with his wife. That's all I can say. I'm sorry. " 

Louis cannot believe what he has just heard. Surely he is high or something because there's no way in this fucking world, did Liam just say Harry has abandoned him to be with Lexi. Not now not when their daughter is so close to entering the world.

He sucks in his bottom lip trying his hardest not to sob in front of all these people. He needs to stay strong but he can't. Tears swell and eventually fall upon his cheeks. He rolls his head towards the ceiling closing his eyes tightly. What seems like minutes pass by before he feels a hand wrap around his own. He opens his eyes and exhales deeply. Finally he isn't alone anymore. 

" How did you know?" 

" Liam rang me. He advised me there was someone in theatre who really needed a friend. " 

Niall smiles as Louis squeezes his hand tightly. 

" You got this Louis. Let's meet your little girl." 

**************

A/N 

I 

hope

 all you guys read my announcement and understand why this chapter was cut dramatically and written so short and sharp. Once again 

I

 apologise. 

Where's Harry ?

# Chapter 23- Delivery 

A/N 

If you have had any trouble during a pregnancy than 

I

 advise you to be cautious and read at own risk. I will announce a TW later on in the chapter. 

Also please 

don't

 hate on the name 

I

 chose. I had to pick something. 

Thought it

 kinda fit well but we all have different opinions.
 So no hate please.

I have 

waited

 so 

long

 for this chapter it was planned months ago and 

I'm

 so excited. Enjoy !  

**********

LOVE: 
A deep and tender strong feeling of affection towards another, and/or an intense emotional attachment. 

Well that's what the dictionary says anyway, but to Louis, there are simply not enough words that can describe the euphoric feeling you endure when you first lay eyes on your newborn baby. 

Tiny toes, tiny feet and a cute delicate button nose. Louis stares in awe at the small miracle in his arms. He cannot explain the foreign emotion he is currently feeling. Rubbing his thumb over her little hand it all hits him.
Looking at the beautiful creation he and Harry had made, he realises he could never feel this way about any other being in this entire world. For the first time in his life he has now experienced what it feels like to encounter ' true love' genuine unconditional love. You could say that as Louis watches her yawn as he readjusts her adorable little beanie, he now becomes acquainted with the word perfection. His daughter is nothing but pure perfect. 

After being back in his room for only 2 hours, Niall who has already taken a gazillion pictures apologies to Louis as he makes mention of having to return home to check on Matilda to who he had left with his mum. 

" Sorry Louis I will be back first thing in the morning ok." 

Louis who finally lifts his head up and away from the pretty face his holding smiles at Niall. 

" I cannot thankyou enough mate. I don't know what I would have done without you. Thankyou so much for being there for me. Yes go home to that sweet girl of yours."

Niall bends down taking another close look at the baby in Louis arms. 

" You too are so cute. Let me take one more picture." 

" Niall you are going to run out of space on your phone in a minute. " Louis laughs as Niall pulls out his phone once again. 

He takes the shot and shows Louis who is beaming with proudness. 

![](https://img.wattpad.com/da075553525eafe453f47dfdc26f2d98007da8b4/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6d364861773948686763673152513d3d2d37352e313730303735633563346533366361363633323535373233373630342e6a7067)

After a long and unconventional turn of events during the last 9 months 'Melody Styles' entered the world at 8.28pm on September 28th.

Now that Niall has left, Louis finally finds himself alone with Melody for the first time. It's a weird thought that this tiny human now relies on him to survive. His mind starts to race a little as he begins to become a little over whelmed. He has tried to ring Harry several times in the last hour and its been pointless. Louis is tired of hearing his voicemail to which he knows it off by heart now word for word. 

There's a tear forming in the corner of his eye as all sorts of scenarios enter his mind as to what's happened to Harry. 

Is he ok? 

Where did he go? 

Why did he go? 

Did he finally leave him for Lexi?
 Melody let's out a lung curdling cry which snaps Louis out of his worries. 

" Hey hey hey love, what's all this noise for hmm? You need a diaper change?" 

He knows she couldn't be hungry. He only gave her a bottle 30 minutes ago. He places her down onto the bed in front of him and calls for the nurse. Having a C- section means he is still very much sore. He is suprised to see nurse Andrea is still on shift when she enters the room. 

" Hi Andrea I'm sorry to call. Melody needs a nappy and I haven't been able to get up and move properly yet. Do you mind collecting my bag over there for me please. " 

Andrea smiles as she sanitisers her hands while making her way over to the bed.

" Oh Louis she is just adorable." She coos before reaching for his bag. 

" Do not apologise for needing help that's what I'm here for love, it's my job." 

It doesn't take long to change her and Louis is amazed at how quickly he feels comfortable with Melody. Since finding out he was pregnant Louis was always paranoid about not knowing how to handle a baby and yet, here he is only 2 hours into parenthood and he feels so relaxed with her, everything between them feeling so natural.

Cradling her for a few minutes is enough to send her to sleep which Louis couldn't be happier about. He is beyond exhausted. His eye lids are so heavy. With the excitement of labour, then suffering the panic that Harry's exit had caused, to the magical feeling of delivery, all he wants to do is close his eyes. 

He places Melody into the hospital crib which is placed next to him and strokes her cheek with fondness. Laying back to stretch out carefully as to not harm his stitches he finds himself looking at his phone on the bedside table. He already knows there's no point, but there's still a fraction of hope somewhere deep down that Harry might answer this time. He clicks Harry's name and again his hit with those words he now despises. 

" Hi, you have reached Harry. I must be busy so please try again soon or leave a message . Byyeee" 

Louis feels torn. 
There's half of him that is so filled with happiness and joy about becoming a parent and meeting his daughter, while the other half is so blantly annoyed and disappointed with Harry that he can't possibly understand why he would do this to him. He is happy but sad and its weighing him down. He just wants him to call at least or let him know his ok. 

He can't help but look over to Melody one last time before he eventually falls asleep.

Poor Louis doesn't get much shut eye. It only feels like his been asleep for 10 minutes but according to the clock it's been 3 hours. It's 2am and Melody has startled him awake by testing out her lungs. He knows it's milk she desires this time and he was right. Andrea had left the formula, a kettle and utensils in the room for Louis to use so he didn't have to leave the room. When the bottle was ready Melody downed the lot without hesitation. 

Unlucky for Louis her fast drinking has caused a bit of trapped air bubbles. It's making her need to burp frequently and it's upsetting her tummy, in return making her cry. He tries patting and rubbing her back, moving her from his shoulder to his chest. He even stands up out of bed and begins to rock her in the hopes the swaying movement will calm her but nothing works. 

He can hear a couple of voices outside of his room and when the door starts to slowly creak open he won't lie confessing that he had hoped it to be Harry but it wasn't. Liam who was washing his hands smiled as he joined Louis near the bed. 

" Someone's a little upset I hear. " 

Louis bites the bottom of his lip now feeling embarrassed that his daughter is disrupting the entire maternity ward with her wailing. 

" I'm so sorry. I've tried to stop her. I don't know what I'm doing wrong." 

Louis's voice trembles as he starts to get a little emotional. Liam looks to Melody than to Louis. 

" Do you mind?" 

" No, go ahead" 

Liam picks her up and examines her. There's nothing physically wrong with her besides some wind that she needs to clear. 

" You are doing a great job Louis. It's just wind. You are adapting to being a parent very well. " 

Liam shows Louis a few techniques to provide Melody with some relief. He wants to ask Liam about Harry again but he knows he is bound by confidentiality and he doesn't want to put Liam in an awkward position again. So he fake smiles as Liam leaves the room after he had thanked him. 

The quietness was blissful but it only lasted 2 hours. Now reaching 4am Louis felt himself becoming overly stressed but he refused to call for any more help, the thought of looking like a failure wouldn't allow him too.

" Mello darling, please I beg of you sweetheart, you don't need to cry so loud. I'm right here. " 
Louis without realising has already given his daughter a nick name as he picks her up cuddling her into his chest as he rolls to his side. 

She starts to settle after a few minutes and as tired as he is, he wants to leave her there so he can sleep but Liam and the nurses all warned him about the dangers of co-sleeping. His sleep deprivation takes over his rational well being and succumbs to dozing off. 

" Louis. Louis. Hey. Wake up." 

He can feel his shoulder being tapped and opens his eyes to see a nurse his never seen before. 

" Hi Louis I'm sorry to wake you, my name is Sue I will be your nurse for the next 6 hours. I do need you to place your baby into the crib while sleeping. It's our hospital policy. I'm so sorry. i just need to do your blood pressure and you can return to sleep." 

Louis let's out a sigh as his daughter extends her arms out stretching as she flutters open her beautiful green eyes. 

He knows that sleep is probably not on the cards now. After Sue does what she came for and vacates, Louis looks to the time it's 5.50am. Again there is still no missed calls or texts. He decides to send a message to him. He wants to crush him with words to show how angry he is, he wants to scream at him for not witnessing their daughter enter the world and supporting him. He wants to let Harry know that his mad. His mind is wanting to scream so much but his heart wants to express something different because confusion comes when he finishes typing and sees the words;

To Harry :
" Harry. Please answer me. You are scaring me. Just let me know you are ok.please."

He hits the send button just in time before Melody starts to cry. He spends the next 2 hours feeding, changing, playing with her but she still continues to fuss and whimper the entire time. Louis is starting to believe that Melody hates him because he still cannot calm her down 100%. Sue enters the room just after 7am bringing Louis his breakfast. Melody is in her crib gently sobbing as Sue offers Louis a comforting smile. 

" It's ok Louis. Babies are allowed to just cry on their own. You don't need to be holding her every second. Letting her be is nothing to feel guilty about." 

Louis wants to cry. It's the fact that Sue could tell exactly how he was feeling  just by looking at him. Was it all that obvious that Louis was tired and struggling. Ashamed thats how he felt. He grabs his fork and circles it around the scrambled eggs with no intention of consuming any. 

As Sue goes to leave she stops at the door glancing back. 

" please eat some breakfast love, you need to keep yourself strong. Even if its only a little bit. " 

Sue along with the rest of the nursing staff had all heard the little rumours surrounding Harry. Like any other work place gossip was easily spread but Sue nor anyone addressed it, they all felt for Louis. 

He manages to eat half the eggs and 1 piece of toast. He does however finish his cuppa tea quickly which he secretly wishes was a coffee, he really could have used the caffiene right now. The room is suddently quiet which prompts Louis to get excited thinking Melody has finally drifted back off. He leans over to see her laying there staring right back at him. He wishes he hadn't done so as the action starts her off again. He rolls over away from her pulling up his blanket. His so tired. He glances over to the clock on the wall. Niall said he was coming back at roughly 8am it's now 7.40am. 

He lets Melody lay there softly babbling as he closes his eyes. He can feel himself drifting into semi unconsciousness when he hears he door open. He already knows it's Niall so he doesn't move. Melody quietens completely for the first time in ages. Without moving a muscle Louis speaks. 

" How did you do that Niall I haven't had no sleep all night. I'm so tired." 

He continues to lay still not having the energy to move. He waits for Niall to respond but he never does. It makes Louis anxious, so he rolls over. 

Harry. 

Louis sits up as quickly as he can without hurting his stitches. He rubs his eyes profusely as if his sub conscious is trying to confirm that its really him and not an illusion. Louis first instinct is to cuss at him, a sense of rage suddenly fulfilling him. He whisper yells to Harry. 

" Where the fuck have- " 

Louis stops abruptly when he finally takes in Harry's appearance. 

He has collapsed to his knees, his bottom resting on the heel of his feet. His head is lowered to his chest with one palm covering his face, while the other hand is draped into the crib, Melody clasping at his pinky.

Something is wrong. 

Harry is devastated it's easy to see, he looks truly gutted. There's no denying it, Harry is completely broken.

Both Liam and the nurses had told Louis he needed to get up and move around soon, so now is as good as time as any. He pulls back the blanket, shifting his legs to the side of the bed. He stands slowly noticing Harry hasn't moved or said anything. 

Watching Melody who is quiet as a mouse at her dads touch warms Louis heart. When he reaches the space in front of Harry, Louis reaches his arm out cautiously lifting up Harry's face.

" Harry?" 

Louis holds a breath not understanding  why he instantly feels nervous.  It's only then he sees the full  extent of Harry's image when Harry connects their eyes. His face is red and tear stained, his eyes swollen and puffy. He can already distinguish that Harry hasn't had any sleep either, but its the look of angony and heartbreak that Louis feels radiating off of Harry that claws at his chest. 

" Baby what's wrong?" Louis asks. 

Harry blinks as Louis watches a stream of tears fall from his eyes. Louis can feel his heart race, as Harry finally opens his mouth. 

" She's gone...she's...." 

His head falls again, Louis reaching out and pulling Harry to his feet. Any anger Louis felt in the last 14 hours has all but gone because Harry is an emotional wreck and Louis wants to find out why. 

" Haz, look at me. Who's gone what do you mean? Where have you been?"

Harry looks back to Melody then back to Louis, his bottom lip trembling. 

" Scarlett she's.....she...she wasn't breathing Lou." 

Just for clarification Louis double checks to make sure he is understanding properly. 

" Scarlett I assume is your daughter?" 

Harry presses his lips tightly together as Louis engulfs him into a hug breaking the connection from Harry and Melody to which she doesn't like as she makes it known with her cry. 

Hearing her little vocal cords Harry peers down close to her now having his first proper look of her. With one hand placed across his chest he uses his other to stroke her cheek before kissing her small hand. And just like that ......Melody was quiet. 

Louis gasps covering his mouth with his hand in disbelief of what his hearing. To think he was so mad at Harry makes his tummy churn even if he wasn't aware of what was happening. 

" Shes so beautiful...." Harry pauses as it seems he enters into deep thought. Taking Louis hands into his own, words start tumbling out of his mouth at record speed. 

"I'm so sorry Lou, I ..I really wanted to be here, I just couldn't leave her ...and Lexi was a mess and ...I should have been here..omg Lou I'm so fucking sorry." 

Harry is shaking from head to toe, he knows deep down Louis will understand but the sheer thought alone that Louis wouldn't forgive him and leave, scares the hell out of him. 

Louis wraps his arms around him pulling him into a tight hug. 

" Shh it's ok love, calm down take a deep breath for me. "

As he watches Harry who can't keep his eyes off of Melody he leans forward to pick her up when she starts to whine as she becomes restless. 

" May I? " Harry asks. 

Louis confused at first proceeds to  smile at him.

" Ofcourse. You don't need to ask to hold her she's not just mine. " Louis remarks trying to soften the mood. 

The moment Melody connects with Harry's chest she stops crying. Louis freezes in astonishment as his daughter starts to flick her eyes open and closed slowly as she starts to drift off to sleep. 

" Well that was easy. " Harry says softly, not having a clue how much its just made Louis internally scream. But at the same time, he realises that all Melody needed, was the exact same thing he had also needed.....Harry.

" I'm so sorry about Scarlett Harry. I don't know what to say. What happened if you don't mind me asking. Stupid question I know but is Lexi alright?" 

Harry plants a kiss to Melody's head and returns her down into the crib. Louis takes a step back sitting himself down onto the edge of the bed. 

" Lexi is struggling as expected. I will tell you all about it babe, I just need a moment to breathe you know." 

" Not trying to sound cruel here H but you look so tired. How about you scoot home, have a sleep and freshen up. I can't imagine how the last few hours have taken a toll on you." 

Harry squeezes his hand. 

" I don't want to leave you Louis. I've missed so much already. I can't apologise enough sweet. I should have been here for you. It's just. I only had a small amount of time to be with her you know and Lexi wasnt coping and either was I if I'm honest. I feel like her dying was somehow my fault and I just wanted to keep holding her. I couldn't bring myself to leave." 

It's brought to Louis's attention just how much Harry has endured and how guilty he feels, when Scarlett's death was most definitely not his fault. Louis still in shock from all this news has no idea how to respond. He lets his arm fall behind Harry and gently caresses his back. 

There's a quiet knock on the door which opens slowly as in walks Niall. 

" Hey mate." 

" Good morning. Am I interrupting?" Niall asks. 

Harry stands to his feet running a hand through his hair and clearing his throat. 

" No it's fine. I was just leaving. " 

Louis looks to Harry with nothing but concern. Harry kisses Louis lips tentatively before whispering to him.

" I will be back. I'm going to go sleep and shower. Our daughter is beautiful Lou, I'm so extremely proud of you." 

Louis doesn't get a chance to reply as Harry is already half out the door. It only becomes apparent to Louis as Harry leaves that he doesn't even  know their daughter's name yet. Well they had discussed it a few months ago, so he can only assume Harry already knows.

Niall looks to Louis.

" So did the little sweet munchkin sleep?" Niall laughs. 

Louis scoffs rolling his eyes.

**************

The moment Harry steps into his and Louis bedroom he takes off his clothes and runs the shower. He stands there his arm under the water waiting for the right temperature but his mind is still buzzing with all that has happened. He can feel his going to crumble again. He isn't sure how he can cry any more, his surely used up every possible tear available. 

He can feel his feet slipping as he starts to fall towards the ground. The ground is cold against his bare skin but Harry can not feel a thing. His numb. Sometimes in life you just need to cry it all out on the floor and that....is perfectly OK. 

He doesn't know how long his been sitting there before he eventually finds the strength to bring himself to his feet stepping into the water. Letting the hot water surround his body he can't help but recall all of the emotions he has succumbed to in one night. 

⚠️TRIGGER WARNING⚠️
Please skip this part if you are affected by talk of still birth/ miscarriage.

~

FLASHBACK

 ~

The moment Liam explained what he had discovered on the ultrasound that he performed when he had left to take Louis to the hospital, Harry felt his heart sink. Knowing Lexi was calling and he ignored her sent  undeniable pain throughout him. After rushing to Lexi's room he found her laying on the bed her hands clasps across her large rounded stomach. The moment she laid eyes on Harry she cried hard. 

Harry lunged forward joining her on the bed taking her hands.

" Shit Lexi I'm so ...I'm so saddened to hear. I didn't know otherwise I would have come sooner. Shit I'm so freaking sorry. " 

Harry lets the tears falls from his eyes that he was desperately trying to hold back. 

" Harry...Liam said...she.." 

" I know darling. I don't know what to say to comfort you. This, this isn't fair." 

Liam had explained to Harry that his daughters heart had unfortunately stopped beating. He remembers so clearly the lump that formed in his throat the second he heard the words. Liam had come into the room with Lexi and Harry to discuss what had to happen next. Lexi was given the opportunity to choose between a C-section or drugs to bring on labour and deliver naturally. After talking with Harry for a few moments Lexi had decided she wanted to deliver as she had always envisioned...naturally. 

There's lots of paperwork involved and so many discussions with doctors, nurses and a anaesthetist that Harry is over loaded with information. Lexi hasn't stopped crying and time is ticking by. 

By the time Lexi is induced Harry hasn't a clue how long he has been gone from Louis. He knows it's been awhile just not the extent he thought. 
He opens his phone to find it flat. Not one ounce of battery left. 

He sighs regrettably understanding that he has probably missed the birth of his other daughter. What he hasn't realised or put into perspective is the time. With so much going on with Lexi, to Harry it feels like his only been gone 5 minutes, when in reality the whole night is passing by. 

Louis has been in the back of his mind the entire time but Harry couldn't find it within himself to give up any of the small amount of time he got to spend with his deceased daughter. 

Scarlett Styles was born at 7.55pm on the 28th September via an emergency induction requested by Dr Payne. 

In a sad twist of fate another angel had grown their wings today and both Harry and Lexi  were unconsolable. 

The labour for Lexi lasted only a couple of hours. When Scarlett was born she was taken immediately to the counter across from her where Liam and a nurse did a quick check and confirmed the inevitable. Clearing up Scarlett first they wrapped her in a small pink blanket and placed her into Lexi's loving arms. 

Harry tried, he really really tired to stay strong for her but he couldn't. The heartache consumed him and he let it all out. He sobbed as he started hyperventilating as grief took over. Scarlett had minimal brown hair and Lexi's dark brown eyes.

After half an hour Lexi handed Scarlett to Harry. He found that he squeezed her that little bit tighter and the out pouring of love he felt couldn't be explained. He didn't know which felt worse. The whole shock of this happening or the ache for the life he will never experience with her. 

What people do not realise is that when parents 'lose' a baby, they are not just losing a newborn. They are also losing witnessing their toddler learn to speak and taking their first step. They are losing the opportunity of watching their child graduate school. They are losing the chance for their child to fall in love and get married. They are not just losing a baby as it is so commonly thrown around. They are losing every blessed magical moment in their child's life. To the parents involved, the future they had invisioned has been stripped away in the blink of an eye. 

Harry doesn't realise how long he had held her when Liam returns. He had mentioned hours ago that they could take as much time as they needed. There was no rush. But when Liam walked in Harry found it extremely difficult to let her go. Lexi wanted one last cuddle and he knew he needed to hand her back. 

When Lexi reached for her, Harry couldn't help but hesitate. For the last few months Harry had worried so much that he wouldn't have loved Scarlett as much as his other daughter and yet here he stood now having to let go of this precious tiny girl who had undoubtedly stolen his heart. He knows he was wrong. He couldn't love her anymore if he tried.  

When he saw the desperation in Lexi's eyes he kissed her tiny hand and laid her on Lexi's chest. Watching Lexi again lose control of her tears broke him and when Liam went to grab her Lexi held on tighter. Harry knew this moment was going to be hard but he didn't know it was going to be this hard. 

" It's time Lex" Harry musters out between his sobs. Lexi nods her head In agreement and kisses her before Harry gently prys her out of her arms.  Harry holds on to her as he walks around the bed approaching Liam. He looks down one last time. He bends down kissing her cheek his own tears falling down onto Scarlett's forehead.

" I love you baby girl" he whispers. 

He delicately lays her into Liam's arms and tucks her blanket around her comfortably. He turns away not being able to bear the thought of watching his daughter leave for the last time. 

" Once again guys, I'm so sorry for your loss" Liam announces as Harry listens to his steps that are receding out the door. When the door closes both Lexi and Harry cling to each other like never before.

Life isn't always about beating the waves. Sometimes it's about learning to breathe underwater because Harry has just drowned in his own tears.

The grief of a still born is unlike any other form of grief. The months of planning, the baby clothes, the diapers, it all magnifies the devastating comprehension of giving birth to a baby that bears no sign of life. 

Both Lexi and Harry have discovered that there is a unique pain that forms from a place in your heart that prepares yourself for a baby that you don't get to bring home.

After several discussions with health professionals Lexi and Harry opted for an immediate cremation. They will follow up with a ' Goodbye' service in the next few days. They get planning straight away. 

~

END

 OF FLASHBACK~ 

When Harry returns to the hospital after his nap which lasted only a few short hours, he decides to check on Lexi first. Upon entering the room he sees Lexi sitting upright in the bed, papers sitting in front of her. 

" You ok? What are those?" 

" They um...they are birth/death certificate forms."

Harry can already tell she's struggling. Lexi is broken in ways she could have never imagined. To lose a child is to lose a piece of yourself. Harry without looking picks up and hands her the paper and pen. The hospital needs her signature for consent to Look after Scarlett's body until they have finalised details for cremation. Lexi looks to Harry for a consoling nod of the head. Wanting to get it signed and over and done with she stops suddently when one of the questions catches her eye. 

Mothers name : 

As if her heart wasn't already in a million pieces she swears she just heard it shatter. Her mind races with questions as she stares blankly at the words printed before her. She can't help but wonder

'
Am 

I

 really a mother? My body delivered a baby but she never drew a breath.'

' Am 

I

 even considered a mother when my belly grew but I never heard a cry?' 

She drops the pen her head falling as she begins to cry. Harry races around the bed engulfing her into yet another hug. He kisses the top of her hair unable to contain his own composure.

" Hey. Look at me. How Bout we write our notes together huh ?" 

When talking with one of grief counsellors they had suggested that both Harry and Lexi write their daughter a note each to place in the box with her while being cremated. They both liked the idea even though he knew it would be difficult.

Harry takes roughly 10 minutes to write his. He had to stop a few times unable to see the words through the thick layer of tears swelling in his eyes. He did however notice Lexi was finished within 30 seconds. Lexi lays down rolling away from Harry. She's tired and exhausted. 

Harry knows he shouldn't do it. It's a personal note but it's right there in front of him and he sees the words clearly. It breaks his heart. 

' 
I carried you for every second of your life, but I will love you with every second of mine. If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever. Love mum ' 

Harry places his note down on the hospital table that is at the end of her bed. He fishes into his pocket pulling out the polaroid photo that Liam so kindly took of himself and Scarlett early on. He looks at his note one last time.

' I am convinced that there is no picture that can convey in all its 

dreadfulness
 
a vision of heartbreaking 

sorrow

 and despair. You may have been born silent but you were without any doubt beautiful and perfect in every kind of way. You are still loved, still missed, still remembered, yesterday today and every day furthermore. You may have been " Stillborn" but you were still born. Scarlett my precious 

baby

 girl, heaven and earth may have seperated us today and I may not have held you for as long as I would have hoped but I promise you this, you will be forever in my heart. Sleep tight my angel. -Dad'

He wraps the note around the photo. 

![](https://img.wattpad.com/2a01ee30f92b8def749984312e73170ecc686bc3/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f54784b353671534b5f7a543869513d3d2d313234353532323536322e313730306234633466303863653061653132363736373030363730362e6a7067)

He hears Lexi snore so he carefully pulls the blanket up and over her. Carefully closing the door not to disturb her he makes his way to the lower floor level to see Louis. 

*************

His not sure how much more his heart can take as he peaks into the room seeing Louis asleep. His out cold. Melody is softly making noises as she lays calmly in her crib. He reaches down bringing her up to his chest.

" Hello there darling. Dad is so sorry for not being here for you. One day when you are alot older I will explain.  But for now, I ask that you please forgive me." 

By some weird unexplainable answer Melody reaches her arms out as she arches her back for a full body stretch grabbing hold of Harry's hand in the process. 

" Is that a yes?" Harry asks her softly. 
" I love you so much Melody. I'm guessing that's what papa called you right ? He was so insistent on it. Well I think it suits you sweetheart. I hope you have been a good girl." 

Unknown to Harry he hadn't heard Louis stop snoring, who was now awake and rolling over. 

" Hey! you said you liked the name if I remember correctly."

Harry smiles at Louis as he places Melody back down. 

" I do baby I love it. " He replies as he connects their lips. 

" Did you have a good sleep?" 

" I did thankyou. Seems you got one too finally. " 

" Yeah I can't explain it. Since you have met her, she has become a totally different baby. Shes so calm now." 

Louis looks down at the forms in front of him and Harry who has seen so many forms in the last 24 hours knows what it is. 
It's Melodys birth certificate.

" I um...I don't know how you are going to feel about this, but I had this idea and look, if you don't like it just tell me " 

" Louis what are you talking about." 

He hands the paper over and  it takes Harry a few seconds until he sees it. Louis can't tell if his sad or happy about it. Harry holds back the tears and hugs Louis tightly. 

" What did I ever do to deserve you Lou. I think it's truly a lovely idea but....I'm not sure Lexi would like it. " 

" Lexi approves." 

Lexi's voice appears out of nowhere as both men flick their heads in the direction to see Lexi leaning against the door frame.

Un-known to Harry, Louis had made a visit to Lexi's room when he had gone home to sleep. 

~

FLASHBACK~

When Harry left, Louis had an idea. He wasn't sure if it was a good one but he needed to try at least. One of the nurses had entered the room for a general check up to just see how the pair were doing. 

After

 seeing all was well Louis asked if the 

lady

 could take Melody to the nursery for 20 minutes while he made a visit to another patient. 

After approaching the reception and finding out her room number he found himself standing out the front of her door. His heart beating rapidly.  Louis was probably the last person she would want to see. He raises his hand to knock but stops when he hears a soft cry. He lowers his hand back down and closes his eyes. 

Hearing her makes Louis's heart break. Now having Melody he can not imagine having to 

have

 to say goodbye to her. As much as he has despised Lexi  over the years he pushes that all aside. They were all friends once and losing a baby is something Louis 

won't

 forgive himself if he 

doesn't

 give his condolences. He takes a deep breath and knocks. 

" Come in" 

Her voice cracks and when he lays 

eyes
 on 
her, he can notice her wiping away her tears. When Lexi looks up Louis is expecting her to scream at him, tell him to get out but it doesn't happen
. 
Somehow
 
as if there's silent words being exchanged between two parents Lexi gives Louis a look to which Louis races to her side just in time before her head falls to Louis shoulder.
 

" 
Oh hunny. I know you are probably tired of hearing it but 

I'm

 so sorry for your loss. " 

Lexi who is trying not to 

break

 in 

front
 
of Louis fails.

"  Lexi darling listen to me closely please. Just remember that none of this is your fault, do you hear me. You 

did

 nothing wrong and no matter what I will always be there for you." 

Lexi turns to face Louis, her face wet from crying. Louis leans over to the bench behind him reaching for a tissue.

After blowing her nose she clears her throat.

" I 

didn't

 mean to take Harry away from your labour Louis, I 

sincerely

 apologise and I swear I 

didn't

 mean to keep him from you. " 

" I know. 

Don't

 worry about me, you look after 

yourself

 ok."

Neither of them can say how long they sat there in silence before Lexi hands Louis a photo of Scarlett. 

" Oh Lex 

she's

 a mini you." 

Lexi turns to face Louis fully. 

" 

It's

 still going to take me alot of time but I can now see how good you are for Harry. You are an amazing person Louis and I can understand why Harry adores you." 

Louis 

doesn't

 know how to respond. 

" He always loved you Lex and he always will. 

Don't

 ever think differently."

Lexi smiles softly and they hug once again. 

" What did you call her ?" Lexi asks timidly. 

" 
Yeah ..ah.. about that. I wanted to discuss something with you."
 

~

END OF FLASHBACK~

" Are you sure?" Harry asks for confirmation. 

" I am. Louis came and asked me while you were gone. Honestly Harry I'm ok with it. It's kind of beautiful." 

Harry looks down at the birth certificate that spells out his daughters name. 

Melody Scarlett Styles. 

Lexi leans forward holding her own piece of paper which she hands to Harry. There's no stopping any tears now as both Harry, Louis and Lexi all start crying. On Lexi's form reads 

Scarlett Melody Styles. 

Louis wipes his tears as he grabs hold of Harry's hands. 

" Both your daughters are loved and always will be. These sisters will always have a part of each other Harry." 

Harry cannot believe his ears. He feels an overwhelming feeling of love from both Louis and Lexi and it warms his heart. He cups Louis cheeks and kisses him. Lexi watches on and its the first time she's seen them intimate. She lowers her eyes to the ground at the sight. It still hurts her but it doesn't disgust her like she thought it would. In some regards she's Happy for Harry. 

Louis notices Lexi's eyes are fixated on Melodys crib. He doesn't know what to do. He feels it's only polite to ask but even though he already knows the answer. 

" You can meet her if you like. " Louis suggests as she continues staring. 

" Oh ah... I'm sorry. No I mean...I would love to meet her at some point. I just can't right now I'm sorry. " 

" There's nothing to be sorry about I totally understand." 

Lexi smiles at Louis then looks to Harry. 

" Harry can I um speak to you outside for a second?" Lexi asks quietly.

Harry follows  Lexi outside. 

" I've been released I can go home later tonight." 

" Do you want me to stay with you ?" 

" No! My parents are on their way to pick me up. They are going to stay with me for awhile. " 

" That's good , I really didn't want you alone." 

Lexi hugs Harry and kisses his cheek. 

" Thankyou so much for being there for me this last 24 hours. I'm really sorry about keeping you away from Louis. I feel terrible Harry I really do." 

" No don't do that. Don't be sorry. You know it couldn't be helped." 

" Congratulations on your daughter Harry you and Louis will be amazing parents it's easy to see. " 

Lexi turns around walking away rather fast. It hurts Harry's heart. He can't believe his life has turned out this way. As happy as he is that her parents are coming to look after her, his worried about Lexi having to see the nursery when she gets home. 

Walking back into the room he finds Louis taking photos of Melody. 

" why are you looking at me like that Styles?" 

" Have you not got enough pictures already?" 

" No I haven't actually."

He turns the camera and snaps some of Him and Melody together. I need some to send to our family and friends. He opens the picture gallery in his phone to show Harry. 

" what about these?" 

![](https://img.wattpad.com/d6cdd9196369f1b5d724dc316c4faa4e7c890f00/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f6969737543327a4c523550577a673d3d2d313234353532323536322e313730306237613836653335643338323637333236343036383131372e6a7067)

![](https://img.wattpad.com/982f4c364f108b44032b2805839b370f2aa97eb9/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f494b4c35744a43424d6454546e513d3d2d313234353532323536322e313730306237616132393734633839623535363739353635363639302e6a7067)

" Perfect" Harry says as Louis uploads them. He grabs Louis hand pulling out his own phone. 

" Let me take one. " Harry says as Louis laughs. 

After a few clicks he turns his phone to show Louis. 

" What do you think?" 

![](https://img.wattpad.com/a4730ca36bd6412e713aaff8d4968135d663b27f/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f74306b795342745a5374475f59673d3d2d313234353532323536322e313730306237636163636166363131643336323038393037373431312e6a7067)

" It's perfect. " 

**************

Louis has to stay in hospital for one more night but this time, he doesn't care, because tonight he is no longer alone as Harry is right where he belongs.....beside him.

**************

A/N 

Thoughts on chapter ?
I'm not going to lie. I cried writing it. 
🥺 

I 

think

 there is only going to be an epilogue left guys.

I hope you enjoyed. 

6800 words! 

Like always, remember to vote and comment, I love seeing your reactions. 
Thankyou so much. 

♡♡♡

# Final Chapter

A/N 

Sorry for all the photos in this chapter. They were just all too cute. There will be 2 time jumps in this chapter. Starting with 6 months, so keep an eye out while reading. 

Also please read the end A/N xxx

***********

~~~ 6 Months Later ~~~

      ![](https://img.wattpad.com/06a0d048d71ee1e97a8ed0345c47a9b73e1f0651/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f50356a5a47754a673663786875513d3d2d313234363638303038322e3137303139626431323261343261323835343030393536393430362e6a7067)

The joy of parenthood arrives in different stages and moments. Without a doubt, there are hard times and sometimes even frustrating times. However, amid all the chaos and challenges we face, the most wonderful moments of love are created and cherished.

**************

Louis licks his lips as he watches Harry walk out the shower door. The water is trickling down his torso as he begins to towel dry his hair. Louis still finds it difficult sometimes to believe that Harry is all his. There have been nights while lying in bed where he has stared at Harry while he slept, questioning the gods as to how he had won the lottery.

To Louis, Harry was the perfect catch. Since Melody has been born, Harry has not only been an excellent partner but the most invested and loving dad he could have ever wished for. Not only does Harry work to provide for their little family, he makes it his priority to remind Louis how much he loves him each and every day and Louis never gets tired of hearing it. Being a hands-on dad is something Louis admires about Harry. He helps with baths and changes nappies and settling Melody when she wakes up is one of Harry's most favourite things to do.

Harry drops the towel from around his waist which makes Louis gulp. There hasn't been a lot of sexual activity since their daughter arrived. Between working, being worn out and exhausted, to Melody taking up all their time, bedroom antics have been exceptionally rare. On the odd occasion, if they were lucky, things usually ended embarrassing quickly.

Tonight is one of those occurrences where Louis is seeking some one on one time. Louis isn't aware that Harry has caught him starring and decides to play it up conspicuously. He uses his hand to gently fondle his manhood. He tries to make it look like his scratching or re-adjusting himself but the truth is, his out to make himself hard. When he begins to support a semi, Harry closes his eyes and slightly bends his head backwards moaning ever so lightly, barely audible but enough for Louis to hear and be teased.  

He could still feel Louis's eyes burning all over him. He opens his eyes to find Louis now situated right in front of him because Louis is rock hard and after the rough day he has had, releasing all his stress through sex seems like the best and most pleasing option available. 

Louis's eyes travel up Harry's body from his navel to his chin until their eyes finally connect. It's become increasingly quiet in the room the only sound being heard is the low static from the baby monitor and both their nervous racing hearts. It's rather funny how the pair after being together many times before still feel the butterflies and nervousness when being intimate. 

Harry cups Louis's cheek before slowly connecting their lips. It's slow and extremely sensual and Louis could almost cum from the kiss alone. Harry tugs at Louis's boxers letting them fall to the floor allowing Louis's length to spring to his stomach. There's a sinful and hungry tone that escapes Harry's mouth. Louis spins around his back now pressed to Harry's front. He can feel Harry's excited cock against his ass. Harry grabs Louis's head tilting it to the side, he starts attacking Louis's neck with multiple kisses before latching on and sucking until he produces a nice purple mark. Louis's dick twitches at the personal feeling it provides. He circles gently pressing back into Harry. 

With limited activity over the last few months, both men already know this isn't gonna last long and Harry doesn't want to waste time. He turns Louis back around, who pushes Harry backwards a couple of feet. He flinches from the coldness that radiates throughout him when his back makes contact with the wall. Harry lifts Louis up holding him under his thighs. Louis leans forward biting harry's bottom lip.

" Fuck me daddy" Louis whispers as Harry nearly falls dead at hearing the lustful words.

Harry lowers Louis onto his cock with no prep and Louis hisses at the burn but welcomes it openly. Harry waits a couple of seconds before Louis starts to ride him, bobbing up and down with the help of Harry's strong arms. The tightness of Louis's inner walls makes him leak, the precum creating some lubrication at last.

Harry can feel his already close. He starts moving hastily, his high already approaching. With his fingernails dug deep into Louis's legs, he grunts as he deepens his cock exploding his load. It just about sends Louis over the edge with his own ejaculation, but not before they are interrupted by a loud piercing scream. Harry halts to a still. 

" Harry no I'm so close don't stop, please." 

Harry doesn't listen. He never does, because if Melody needs him, he is right there. He lowers Louis and peck's him on the lips. 

" Sorry babe." 

Harry heads to the ensuite bathroom and cleans himself up. As he walks out he looks over to the bed to see a very annoyed looking Louis. 

" Finish you once I'm back?" Harry says sheepishly with a grin. 

Louis frowns before rolling over and  pulling up the blanket. Harry can't tell wether the look is a joke or if his genuinely mad. Either way it makes Harry feel guilty. 

When Harry enters the nursery he is met with a sad tear-faced Melody who is sitting up in her cot. There's one thing Harry can not stand to see in this world and that's his daughter upset. He leans over grasping her into his arms. 

" Hey, my little princess, what's all this crying for huh?" 

And just like it always has been for the last 6 months, Melody becomes quiet the moment she feels safe in her dad's arms. 

" Let's get that nappy changed." 

Harry lays her down onto the changing table and removes her pyjama bottoms. He continues to chat away with her while finishing up with the talcum powder. 

" You really were a handful for papa today weren't you, yep he told me all about it. As much as I love you baby girl, I need you to cut papa some slack. He loves you just as equally as me and he deserves a break munchkin." 

There are no lies from Harry it's all true. Melody was in fact driving Louis crazy today. So much so that he called Harry at work while he had a little mental break down. He's sure she's teething but no matter what Louis did to try and soothe her nothing worked and Louis knows why. 

Because nothing he gave her.....
was harry. 

Melody is dads princess, there's no questioning it. If Melody could talk right now, it would be a case of her telling her dad to 'jump' and Harry would reply with a 'how high?'  

You could say in simpler words. 
Harry is wrapped around Melody's little finger.

Cuddling her into his chest after he positions himself down into the rocking chair, Melody is already yawning. Harry looks around the dimmed lit room, noticing the MS initials on her towel, that is hanging over the bedroom door,that Niall had made and gifted her after she was born. It makes him smile. 

" You wanna know a secret darling....I love your papa so very much. I have loved him for such a long time. Just like papa does for you, he keeps me feeling loved and protected. When I'm down and need someone to talk too, he is always there. Your papa's smile, laughter and huge heart is what keeps me alive...and you of course." 

He strokes her cheek as her eyes close, this time not fluttering back open. He doesn't want to chance her waking just yet, so he continues to rock back and forth. 

" One day very soon, I am going to put a ring on your papa. How would you like that hey?"

Harry has been thinking about it for a while. He loves Louis unconditionally and ever since Melody made her grand entrance into the world, Harry has felt it was time. He doesn't like the unsettling feeling he gets when they have to write down their names somewhere and there's always two Styles and One Tomlinson. It doesn't feel right in the least. 

Melody hasn't moved. He stands slowly, returning her to the cot. He places her blanket over her and closes the door leaving it slightly ajar. He tiptoes down the hall and enters his bedroom. Louis is pretty much in the same position as he was when Harry left. Turning off the lamp, he crawls into bed behind him and wraps a arm around his waist. Harry is sure Louis is asleep. He hasn't moved or said anything so he places a kiss to the back of his head and whispers a soft 
' Goodnight sweetheart'

However, Louis is awake. 
He is just 'pretending' to be asleep. Why? 
Because Louis is frozen in thoughts, in happiness actually, because Harry had forgotten the baby monitor was on.

*************

~~~ 9.5 years later ~~~ 

      ![](https://img.wattpad.com/c7a6c017f42e4da9a724d1ac03c50d4680e8a94a/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f39626e796130363430514a3379413d3d2d313234363638303038322e313730313962646366353337376538613735313334393434393134332e6a7067)

~~~Melody age 10~~~

" Dad stay still. " Melody demands as she attempts to paint yet another one of Harry's fingernails. 

" Papa's right, you never do as you are told." 

" Hey. That's not true....wait a minute papa says that?" 

Melody rolls her eyes, like as what she said was the most obvious statement ever.

" Yes, mainly when his mad at you. Like when he tells you to take a umbrella when you go for a walk but you don't and then you complain about getting rained on" 

Harry's giggles. 

" Yes I can kinda of see that now. Papa is pretty smart isn't he." 

Melody smiles as she finishes. 

" Do you like it dad, please o' please tell me you like it." 

Harry lifts his hands examining his daughters work. 

" Absolutely beautiful, you are so talented Miss Styles." 

Just as Harry scrunches his nose cutely towards her, they both freeze as Louis's voice roars from downstairs. 

" Melody Scarlett Styles! Get down here now!" 

Both Harry and Melody's eyes have widened in shock. 

"  Papa called you by your full name, Oh darling what have you done?" 

Melody shrugs her shoulders genuinely having no clue. Melody gets up immediately running down to the living room where Louis is currently sitting on the lounge folding laundry. 

Melody doesn't like being in trouble but somehow she always seems to find herself in the mix of it all. Hearing Louis call her Melody makes her nervous. Louis always refers to her as Mello, the nickname he has used since the day she was born. 

" You want to explain to me why your brother just told me to "slay bestie" Louis says using air quotations.

Melody looks to Colby and back to Louis. 

" I dunno I never taught him that I promise."

Colby William Styles was born when Melody was two years of age. Was he a suprise? To Louis yes but not to Harry who was desperate for another baby. He made sure there was a lot of practise sessions going on. Louis had always said if it happened it happened, so Harry well, he tried and tried until the inevitable took place. 

      ![](https://img.wattpad.com/a1aaca5678081acba15c2117d12dce6268b383ec/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f456648534b676d4f4266646533513d3d2d313234363638303038322e313730313939376336666136356465353436333738313239363934302e6a7067)

Colby aged 8 ~~~

Colby was a Louis mini clone. He was the sweetest little boy who couldn’t hurt a soul. He was papa’s little boy and Harry sometimes got confused who he was talking too when chatting with Colby because he spoke with such wisdom and maturity and Harry often couldn’t believe how much Colby resembled Louis.

“ Papa, listen to me. You didn’t let me finish. I didn’t say I heard Melody speak it.“ Colby says quietly but firmly not wanting to get his sister into trouble for something she had not done.

“ oh..Well where did you hear it then? “ Louis questions.

“ It was dad. He was the one who said it.“

Just then Harry appears in the doorway.

“ What did I say?“ He asks now only hearing the last part of the conversation.

“ Slay bestie…really Harry.“ Louis says.

“ Don’t be mad papa, dad only said it to the lovely man. “ claims Colby.

Louis glares at Harry.

“ Lovely man huh.“

Louis stands up and storms upstairs. The sound of the bedroom door being closed harshly can be heard by all.

“ Dad I’m sorry. I didn’t mean- “

“ Hey. Don’t apologise. You did nothing wrong. Papa is just…having a bad day that’s all. Melody how about you take your brother outside and play and I will be out there in 20 minutes.“

Melody nods her head and takes her brothers hand. As they walk off Harry couldn’t help but over hear their conversation.

“ I’m sorry Mello. I never said to Papa it was you. “

“ I know. “ Mello responds as she ruffles the top of Colbys hair.

“ Race you outside.“

Harry smiles feeling a sense of accomplishment with how his children have been raised. He looks in the direction of the stairs. Now he needs to distinguish what it is that has Louis so worked up. Surely Louis wasn’t truly upset right?

He pushes open the door to see Louis in just his sweat pants, his back to him as he searched their walk in closet for another shirt. Harry approached him from behind wrapping his arms around Louis waist. He knows it’s risky but he places a kiss to crook of Louis neck right near his collarbone.

Louis pulls away, which Harry was expecting anyway. Without looking his way Louis takes that as an invite to speak.

“ Why don’t you go kiss the other ‘lovely man’.“

Harry wants to laugh, but he knows it will only infuriate him further. He wants to explain to him that the ‘lovely man’ that Colby had referred to earlier was a 70 year old busker they had met at the mall while grocery shopping a few days prior. He opens his mouth but Louis beats him to it.

“ Just give me some fucking space Harry will you“

Harry frowns throwing his hands up in the air in disarray.

“ What the fuck is wrong with you lately. Always so fucking moody. Snap out of it. I’m taking the kids to the park. “

Harry shuts the door on his way out not witnessing Louis start to cry.

After several hours at the park Harry and the kids arrive home to a pizza on the kitchen table for dinner. Since having children Louis has pretty much cooked every night so seeing takeaway is something now of a rare sight. After the children have washed their hands and eaten, he prepares them for an early bed.

When he eventually walks into his room Louis is snuggled up under his blanket facing the inside of the bed. Harry hates it when they do this. Over the years not speaking to his husband when they are fighting internally kills him.

He walks around not bothering to remove the blanket and lays himself down on top of the bed facing him. They stare at each other for a brief few seconds before one dares to speak.

“ He was an old man darling. A busker. That was all.“

Louis closes his eyes feeling like a dickhead.

“ I’m sorry I over reacted. It was so stupid. Fuck, I’m such an idiot.“ Louis says quietly, frankly a little embarrassed over his ridiculous rant.

“ Don’t be silly. Kinda glad u got a little jealous. “ Harry winks lightening the mood.

Harry can tell by the way Louis doesn’t laugh that something is still not right.

“ Babe what is it. Please talk to me.“

Harry stares in the sea of blue as Louis bites his lip.

“ I’m pregnant.“

Harry couldn’t smile harder if he tried but he soon retracts it when he notices Louis doesn’t seem excited at all. He most certainly is not having the same reaction he had to colbys pregnancy. This time, Louis looks miserable.

“ I…are you not happy about it?“

Harry wished he had worded it a little better but he just needed a direct answer.

“ I don’t know if I can go through it all again Harry. You know it’s been hard.“

Melody as mentioned was all for Harry. There was a time when Louis felt neglected. He knows it was stupid he doesn’t understand it even to this day. But sometimes he had found himself crying. He carried her for 9 months, she came out of him and yet Melody only soothed and craved for Harry. It wasn’t until Melody was at the age of talking when Louis and Melody finally bonded properly.

When Mello had homework problems, or couldn’t find something, she went to Louis but anything remotely personal she always needed Harry’s hug. Neither of them understood it but they made peace with it.

When Colby came alone, things changed and escalated quickly as Colby only found comfort in Louis. The roles somehow being reversed. Harry played sports with Colby a lot and they had their own bonding time but Colby was always at Louis side. If Louis moved Colby moved. If Louis needed a shower, Colby would crawl and sit in the bathroom until he was finished. As much as Louis loved it at first having missed out on that with Mello he soon found it suffocating. Louis became stressed. Harry worked a lot and Louis found raising two young children harder than he expected.

“ Lou what are you saying? Please don’t let it be, what I think your meaning.“

Harry sits upright and worryingly starts biting his nail.

“ How long have you known, how far along are you?“

Louis picks at the hem of the sheet.

“ I only found out this morning when I took a test. I knew I wasn’t being myself and I felt off for a few days. I just….I need some time to process it all. I need time to think about what to do.“

“ What to do!!“

Harry jumps up out of the bed scaring Louis in the process at the sudden movement.

“ Harry. Please. I’m no spring chicken anymore I’m 37. After having Colby we have been so careful this is not what I had planned. I thought we were happy with us being a family of four. I…thought….“

Louis pauses as he looses his train of thought as Harry walks over to the cupboard pulling out a blanket and spare pillow.

“ I cannot believe what I’m hearing.“

Harry exits the room leaving no chance for Louis to reply. Louis feels a little conflicted, trapped if you wish. He is fully aware how Harry feels about babies and Louis too loves his kids immensely but there’s tonnes of thoughts racing through his mind that’s scaring the shit out of him.

Louis does not enjoy the fact that Harry is the only one contributing any income. When Melody was born Louis finished his last book and it was published when Mello turned one. It became a best seller and Louis had a big payout. However babies are very expensive and Louis found out the hard way as he seemed to burn through the money rapidly.

Harry and Lexi had sold the house next door and once again Harry handed it all over to Louis. It didn’t make him feel good. With Harry bringing in a hefty paycheck every week Louis feels he doesn’t contribute to his childrens welfare.

For the first time in almost 10 years Harry sleeps on the couch.

---

When a couple argue, every word has consequences, but giving the ‘Silent Treatment’ makes the loudest noise of all. Harry and Louis haven’t spoken in two whole days.

Harry has been staying at work as much as he can, while Louis has kept busy with housework and entertaining the kids. Louis rang Niall today to have a heart to heart. He didn’t reveal his pregnancy news just explained that they were arguing. Niall being the problem solver he is, suggested to Louis to sit down when he has a chance and watch their wedding video in an effort to remind himself how much he loves Harry and how fighting isn’t worth giving everything up for.

So he does. While the kids are at school, he places the DVD into the player and lounges back on the couch. He is hating not speaking with Harry. It feels foreign and awkward and he misses him. He makes it up until their vows before he breaks down. He pauses the screen, the picture of them in their suits kissing under the alter. He drifts off remembering how excited he was when Harry proposed.

  

" Harry, this is so lovely. I can't believe you have set this up. I love you so much!" 

Harry had arranged for Niall to watch Melody at his house for a few hours so they could have a 'date' at home. Harry had planned it all out. He knew Louis wouldn't go out to a restuarant, he hadn't been feeling too well lately and he wouldn't want to be too far away in case Niall called. 

He decided to set up a romantic little space in their dining room. He didn't want to over do it, not wanting Louis to discover prematurely what was happening. 

      ![](https://img.wattpad.com/c8941c6556bf31d37f45a356ce96d233dba2a54f/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f54585557453648447942705244513d3d2d313234363638303038322e313730316230343739353964303264663238363132353133353932302e6a7067)

He made a nice home cooked meal of spaghetti and meatballs, the aroma floating around the house. Niall who was Harry's accomplice, had organised for Louis to return home just in time for their meal. 

" This table is too cute babe. I can't believe....Oh my God Haz we are alone...like fucking alone alone. Like for the first time in so long. This is so beautiful. " Louis gushed at the amount of red everywhere which was his favourite colour. 

Harry smiles as Louis raises his eyebrows suggestively as he kisses him softly on the lips. 

" I hope your hungry." Harry responds.

After completing their meals. Harry became extremely nervous. He can feel the sweat building in his palms. His pretty sure his hearts beating that loud Louis might soon hear it. Louis stands up reaching to clear the dishes. 

" I don't think so mister put that down." 

Harry stands grabbing both of Louis hands into his own. His not ready for the big question just yet. First he has a present for him. 

" Babe. You know how much I love and adore you right." Harry starts.

" Harry what have you done? Did you break some thing? Oh shit that explains the flowers you gave me when I walked in the front door. My God what was it, please tell me it wasn't anything expensive." 

Harry laughs. 

" Shit Lou thanks. Like...yeah thanks. No I didnt break anything" 

Harry takes the opportunity to kiss him again. 

" I got you a present actually. " 

He reaches into his pocket pulling out a tiny bag. Louis watches on quizatively. Opening it up Harry pulls out two necklaces. 

"This one is for you and this one is for me."

Louis turns around as Harry places it around his neck. 

Louis looks down at the key charm. 
He didn't understand what it meant at first until he saw Harry's matching heart. 

" You are too god dam adorable. How did I become so lucky, I love you baby. Thank you so much for this.Tonight has been so perfect." 

      ![](https://img.wattpad.com/c2e809e5a03a4476cdacf2dc6c8b30b7ef525206/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f724c594c596248683354355450413d3d2d313234363638303038322e313730316164646432326238356366653933343131383835303038302e6a7067)

" You are very welcome darling, however, there is one more surprise I have for you." 

Louis saw Harrys face change. Only seconds ago Harry was all smiles and dimples and now he looks utterly pale. Unknown to Louis, Harry does feel sick. Completely sick to his stomach as his belly tightens with nerves. It's time. It's now or never. 

" Harry are you ok. You don't look so good." 

Harry doesn't answer. He grabs Louis's hand and literally drags him into the adjoining living room. Louis freezes and smiles. 

" Haz, what are these? They are too cute! " 

Louis hasn't moved yet as Harry's grip on him is strong. 

" Are they what I think they are?" 

Louis walks over to where the teddy bears are lined up on the table. When he gets close enough he looks back to Harry who is still stood across the other side of the room. 

" You went back to Build-A- Bear !?!? When?" 

Harry smiles. 

" I did..yes..and not alone, Melody had a wonderful time helping me choose the colours." 

Harry takes a deep breath and exhales out deeply. 

      ![](https://img.wattpad.com/81e0116aea4a96b090f7d51d8891fc85269c4d6b/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f517a634357486f4b5a70676a50413d3d2d313234363638303038322e313730316166623262363031633062393838333731313534393735322e6a7067)

" These ones have names Lou. You just need to press their feet to hear them voice their name. Start from the left. " 

Louis who looks intrigued stands to the left and instantly squeezes the first bears foot revealing it's name.

" Will" the bear says. 

" That's a cute name. Remember I had that on the list if Melody was a boy. Will short for William. " Louis smiles. 

He reaches out to bear number two and Harry feels himself of the verge of vomiting. 

" You" the bear says. 

" That's a weird name Harry." Louis scrunches his nose confused. 

This is it, he knows Louis is about to fully get it. He bites his bottom lip so hard he can taste the blood. 

" Marry" the bear says. 

Louis spins around so fast. Tears already spilling from his eyes. 

" Yes Harry, yes yes hell yes!!" 

Louis lunges towards him jumping up into his arms. He kisses Harry all over his face before settling on his lips. 

" Aww bear number 4 looks sad, you totally neglected it. "  Harry mocks. 

Louis laughs incredibly hard. 

" I don't care styles. We have 40 minutes until Melody arrives home. Take me to bed. " 

~~~END OF FLASHBACK~~~

Louis heads to the kitchen for a tissue and blows his nose. He quickly throws it in the bin when he hears the front door open and close. It was only 1pm so it wasn't the kids and Harry doesn't normally get home til after 5. 

It was Harry. 

Louis wiped his eyes as he looked at Harry who had too stopped in the kitchen. 

" Harry -" 

" Louis I can't do this anymore. I can't go another day like this. I miss you baby. I'm so sorry." 

Harry wraps his arms around him squeezing him tightly. 

" I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. I would like to talk to you about it thou. " 

" I've missed you too. That would be great actually." 

" How about I see if I can get the kids babysat and we can go have a quiet meal tonight, somewhere we can have a chat without interruptions." 

" Sounds great." 

***************

" Colby, when we leave soon, you can have 2 snacks only. Do not let Mello convince anyone otherwise. Do you hear me?" 

" Yes papa."

" Mello. Come down here please. !" 

Louis scoots around quickly packing away the mess the kids have left sprawled over the kitchen table. 

" Wow papa you look handsome. " 

Louis walks over to Mello and kisses the top of her head. 

" Thank you sweetheart. Please look after your brother tonight, be kind and let him help pick out a movie. I don't want to hear of any fights while I'm gone." 

" Me...fight...never." Melody smirks. 

Harry enters the room and his mouth falls open when he sees Louis. He is dressed smart in some black tight jeans and a light blue button up shirt. His styled his hair like he had done so  many years ago and Harry feels like his just stepped back in time. He can't help it as the universe naturally pulls himself towards him.

" You look remarkably stunning" 
Harry kisses his cheek as the door bell rings. 

" Kids. Your babysitter is here. " 

" Yay!!! " Melody yells from the lounge room. 

Louis opens the door. 

" Hey thank you so much for this. " 

" No worries. Any time. You know I love spending time with them."  

and Louis does know that's true, it's why he never frets when he leaves them. 

Both Melody and Colby suddenly approach the doorway, arms out stretched as they both yell in unison.

" Aunty Lexi" 

Lexi smiles fondly as she catches Colby in her arms. 

" You two, please look out for Mason."
Louis demands as he points towards the pram next to Lexi currently being held by Sam.

" His only very little, so calm down." Louis says firmly.

When Lexi had lost Scarlett she remained living in the house next door for the following year before it all became too much. She made mention to Harry that selling their house would allow her to move on somewhere fresh. Harry couldn't deny her that. He made the sale happen quickly and Lexi moved across town. 

A couple of years later Lexi and Louis had bumped into each other at a gas station. He so happened to be with Melody. Lexi was surprised at how she felt when meeting the little green eyed girl. Lexi imagined she would crumble upon seeing her, the memories of her own loss surely ready to haunt her but it didn't happen. There was something in Melody's personality that warmed Lexis heart, making her somehow drawn to her.

Louis invited Lexi to dinner and well, there somewhat awkward history was all but well forgotten. The kids loved Lexi and Lexi loved them in return. Three years ago Lexi met a lovely gentleman called Sam, a lawyer who had transferred to Lexi's firm and the pair had hit it off. Two years ago they married in Italy, and just 3 months ago little Mason was born.

Harry and Louis could not have been happier for her, and Lexi still fully believes Mason is a miracle.

" Be good for Lexi, ok" 

" Louis stop being a worry wart. They are always good for me, aren't you Melody?" 

" Yes always...Lexi never gives me soda when you leave, never papa." Her devious smirk makes Louis and Harry laugh.

" Right, if all's good here, I think we should get going. " Harry insists. 

Louis kisses both children. 

" We won't be too long." 

" Louis, go. Enjoy yourself please. You have nothing to worry about. " 

Harry places his hand on the lower part of Louis back and slowly ushers him out the door. Louis ignores the comment he hears Lexi make to Melody. 

" Little dobber. No soda for you tonight." 

It makes Louis smile as Harry closes the door. 

**************

Harry had chosen a quiet little restuarant not too far away from their house. It was small and private and had a great reputation. It had become a little quiet as it does without the kids in tow. There's an elephant in the room and Harry needs it sorted. 

When the waiter finally leaves after collecting their order Harry pours himself a glass of wine. 

" Water? " 

" Please" Louis replies politely. 

" Lou I really need to apologise to you.  When you told me about the pregnancy I was estatic. You know me, I was just excited and when you...well, when you suggested what you did, I guess I just wasn't expecting it that's all." 

Louis's head drops to the table where he stares at the flowered vase, listening intently. 

" when we didn't talk for two days it killed me. It gave me a lot of time to think and I realised its not my choice. You know how I feel but if for whatever reasons you feel that makes you believe you don't think you can go through with another baby Louis than I stand by whatever decision you make. What ever you decide will not make me love you any less." 

Louis reaches across the table clutching Harrys hands. 

" Thank you. You don't know how happy I am to hear you say that. I just need a few more days to think about it. " 

Now that the conversation has been started, the husbands continue to discuss their thoughts for the following hour. Harry asked Louis about what was troubling him, and Louis explained everything from not coping to worrying about money to having no job. Like usual Harry comforted Louis and promised to be there for him no matter what.

The night was a success. Harry was glad he had the chance to make things right again between them and Louis was happy he got to express everything he has been compressing inside. Things were hopefully looking up for the pair. 

**************

Breakfast in the styles house was usually rowdy and by rowdy they all meant Melody. That girl can really  talk. Louis is supporting a headache. He woke a couple of times last night feeling a little nauseous. Harry is making pancakes and the smell is driving him crazy. 

" You ok babe?" 

" Yeah it's just the smell is a little off putting that's all. " 

" Are you not feeling well papa?" Colby asks as he and Melody enter the kitchen. 

" Oh...yeah..just feeling under the weather a bit. I will be ok. " 

Louis looks to Harry for confirmation that the lie was good enough and is glad when Harry gives a reassuring nod. 

" Here papa I collected the newspaper from the front door for you. " 

" Thanks kiddo" 

Harry continues to cook the pancakes when he hears Louis gag. Luckily it goes un noticed by the kids who are now talking among themselves while waiting patiently on their ipads.

" I can stop and make something else if it's that bad."

Louis doesn't know what prompts him to say it, I guess he feels it's a joke an attempt to make light of the situation. 

" I could really go some peanut butter  croissants."  Louis snickers. 

Harry doesn't laugh. He looks back to the pan because he doesn't want Louis to see the pain he is currently feeling. He doesn't want Louis seeing him upset because he doesn't want to sway Louis into guilt to keep the baby. He wants the decision to be made purely on how Louis feels and nothing more. 

Louis looks down to the newspaper and scoffs

" You are fucking kidding me "

Harry leans back noticing the front cover. There in the middle of the page stood Elly with a headline Louis never expected to see. 

' World renown Model and Fashionista flaunts her growing baby bump'

Harry notices the way Louis attitudes changes. 

" Never thought I'd see that." Harry says cautiously. " Don't worry about it babe." He continues. 

" So she did want a baby just never with me." Louis comments his voice soft and trembling. 

Louis turns his head as Colby starts laughing loudly at Melody pulling funny faces. It's enough to make Louis notice right there that this is enough, the laughter, the sibling rivalry, the bills, the love. This is what his always wanted, all of it. His children and husband were the most precious people in the world to him. Feeling a tug at the heart, Louis doesn't realise he has sub consciously starting gently rubbing his belly. He smiles fondly and looks to Harry who smiles back. There's nothing to explain, no words need to be exchanged. Harry can already sense that Louis has just made his decision. 

**************

~~~ 3 Months later ~~~

Harry doesn't understand why young girls tend to be so loud when having sleep overs. Melody and Matilda are currently playing music from her bedroom and it's currently 10pm. 

" Harry c'mon let them be. Twenty more minutes and I will make them turn it down. It's a Saturday night relax a little. Come here and cuddle with us." 

Colby is snuggled into Louis's side struggling to keep his eyes open wanting to finish the remainder of the movie. Harry plonks down along side him crawling under the blanket. 

Exactly 20 minutes later Louis keeps his word and makes his way to Mellos room while Harry carries a sleeping Colby to bed. He knocks on the door and enters when Melody gives the all clear. 

" Hate to be the bearer of bad news little ladies but it's time for bed." 

" No papa we were just about to read." 

" You.... read?...haha " Louis laughs because the only time Melody reads, is when she's being forced to at school. 

" Funny papa, I was just going to read this with Matilda." 

" What book are you talking about?" 

Melody pulls the book out from behind her back. She already knows Louis is going to say no because she's tried this many times before. 

" Nope" Louis says firmly snatching the hardcover, making a mental note to lock the only copy he has in his safe. 

" Why papa? I just wanna know the story. The story of you and Dad. What's so wrong with that? " Melody pleads as Louis tucks her into bed. 

" You will hear the story....someday...just not... today. When you are a lot older, I promise!"  

" You are so mean." 

" Melody, don't speak to your papa that way"  Harry says as he enters the room. 

" Good night girls. Have a good sleep." 
Harry bends down kissing Melody's forehead, then looks to Matilda. 

" Did you ring your dads and say good night? " 

" Yes sir" 

" Matilda I don't know how many times I've told you, you don't need to call me that. Just call me Harry." Harry smiles at Matilda's good manners. 

" Ok. I'm sorry, daddy says it polite." 

" It is yes but I really do not mind just being called Harry ok. You have a good sleep too."  

" Night loves" Louis chirps in as they close the door. 

When they enter their bedroom Louis sits down on the edge of his bed rubbing his now rounded 4 month pregnant belly. He looks at the book in his hand, the last book he ever wrote. He hadn't seen it in a while. He smiles as he is reminded how much he misses writing. 

He places it on the bedside table and rolls over snuggling onto Harry's chest. Looking at Harry Louis feels nothing but bliss and contentment. Harry kisses Louis as he realises this is it. Everything he ever wanted with Louis fell into place exactly how it was destined to be.

They made it. 

" What book did she want to read?" Harry questions. 

Louis let's out a laugh and clears his throat trying to keep a straight face. 

" When the wives are away." 

THE END.

A/N

Completed at 7k reads. To say I'm beyond happy is truly an understatement. I loved writing this story and it was all due to the love and support from many of you along the way. I just want to shout out to a couple of people. If I haven't mentioned you please understand there were just too many to individually name but you all never went un- noticed. To the continuous comments and voting on chapters. I seen you all and appreciate each and everyone of you. 

How did you find the ending? 

A special thanks to the following. Wattpad was being a pain and wouldn't let me tag. Sorry if I've missed anyone like I said I seen you all and appreciate everyone. 🙏 

Ingelanting 
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